>>5396THE STORY THUS FAR:
Spike has travelled to the sandy outpost of Appleoosa on an as-yet unknown mission of honour, glory and ponyfest destiny. He has donned the red sombrero that will forever cement his reputation in the history of Equestria. Worlds will collide, universes will implode, and Derpy will fly in the correct direction. Now read on...
'So much for the disguise,' Spike thought bitterly to himself. Thinking quickly, he tackled Applejack and drew her deftly into an alley between two buildings.
"What in tarnation-?!"
"Sssshhh! I can't let word get out that I'm here!" said Spike urgently, glancing out of the alleyway to see if anypony had noticed his rash move. "I've been tracking those dastardly Diamond Dogs for ages now, and if they know I'm in town they'll up sticks and vamoose before I can collar them."
"What? Why would you want to track down those mangy mutts anyways?" asked Applejack, picking herself up off the ground and dusting off her beloved hat.
Suddenly, it seemed as though a shadow was drawn over Spike's face. He turned away from Applejack and gazed out over the plain.
"The last time we encountered them, they stole something very dear to me. A keepsake that I meant to hold close to my heart until the day I die."
"And that is...?" Applejack asked in hushed tones.
"...The jewel that Rarity gave me."
"Aw, fur Pete's sake!"
"Whaaat?!"
"You're getting all so serious over a single jewel?!"
"It was given to me by the most beautiful pony in all of Equestria - the pony whose hoof I shall one day request in marriage, and I plan to have that selfsame jewel set in a ring as a symbol of our everlasting love!"
Applejack snorted heartily. "Yeah, well, good luck getting it back." She turned to leave.
"Wait!"
"...Get your hands off mah tail."
"Sorry. Applejack, you know a thing or two about the lands around here, don't you?"
"I guess so."
"Then you can help me find them! You must know a thing or two about tracking."
Applejack stared at Spike for a long while. His eager expression had a certain quality of dreadfulness to it.
"If I don't help you with this, you'll keep pestering me til ah do, arencha?"
"You bet."
"I'm in."