Boredom gets to us all. And it just happend to me recently. Luckily I came up with this story to end my boredom. Unfortunately the result is...unique to say the least:
Lyra ate a Snickers bar, it was delicious.
Then the universe exploded and was reborn under the rightful rule of Nicholas Cage. Everypony in Equestria died except for Trixie because Trixie is awesome. Then cats with pineapple bodies emerged from the pits of hell and chased after Trixie for several million years.
During this time the rule of Nic Cage was nice except for the time the Snorgleberg Empire attacked. That was particularly weird and annoying but it soon went away after Nic Cage's Giant Squirrel brigade whooped their asses to next century (no seriously their asses got whooped to next century. They would be found exactly 107 years, 25 days, and 13 minutes later partying it up in a night club).
Then suddenly after Nicholas Cage was assassinated in a rebellion a portal to Tartarus opened up and everypony emerged from it to walk the lands of the mysterious planet known as "Cageland". There was some confusion at first as Princess I-Don't-Give-Two-Flying-Fucks went on a rampage and killed four-hundred-and-seven German citizens in a rampage that lasted only 47 minutes.
Pirncess IDGTFF was then captured and prosecuted for war crimes before being sent off too New Estonia for execution by hanging. Former President Obama then 207 years old then exploded and flew off to fairyland which had secretly existed all this time. Several people followed but the sheer awesome power of Obama blinded them and they too exploded.
Meanwhile in Equestria Trixie had found a way to teleport herself to Cageland, unfortunately this came at the cost of teleporting the pineapple-cats as well but it was a minor price to pay. After the teleportation there was a 10-year long Civil War between the ponies and humans of Cageland and the seemingly endless amounts of pineapple-cats, but it eventually ended when the pineapple-cat queen and king were killed during a convoy raid.
Then Sombra (who had been sealed in a block of gumdrops the whole time) finally broke free of his prison and enslaved everyone who served him for all eternity.
THE END.
EDIT: GODDAMIT SPOILER WHY CAN'T I EVER REMEMBER HOW YOU GO?!
Edited by iluvponies35, 02 September 2014 - 03:40 AM.



