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Harmonosphere, Book One: Convergence (WIP)


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#201 greebster

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 08:40 PM

It's like watching a knight train for a lifetime and be an absolute master at swordsmanship, only to be taken down by a lowly peasant who only trained for 3 weeks with a crossbow.


might I mention that this is reality, don't expect all things to be as they are. But I'm not saying your character will die.

@hxfthxft. Change your character however you like. But know that though your character must have his limits, he is a bad guy and they are allowed to be madly OP. In other words moderate the use of his magic but keep him incredibly hard to kill. If you want.

#202 Volvonski

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 08:41 PM

That makes much more sense, but my character is still pretty much dead without magic as its the only way he can use his sword. His sword is enchanted to be not only resilient to damage and be very sharp, but unless the right spell is cast(a spell only paladins of the empire were taught) the sword becomes incredibly heavy that even the most strongest being wouldn't be able to pick it up(just like thors hammer mjolnir).

#203 greebster

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 08:47 PM

Thor's hammer style, huh? Well maybe the loss of your magic will be a twist in the story leading to you getting it back eventually. Then your sword will return to your hoof... Enough said, I don't want to be practically making a spoiler right here. That could be one possibility though.

#204 Golfmann

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 10:07 PM

My character has frickin golf clubs! Ya'll villains are screwed now!

#205 hxfthxft

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 10:09 PM

Added some new abilities to my character

#206 greebster

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 10:18 PM

Our good guys have one thing that our bad guys don't. Hopefully they will remember it in the end.

Edited by Greebster, 24 November 2012 - 10:32 PM.


#207 Volvonski

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 10:44 PM

Let me guess is it a cappuccino machine?.

#208 Golfmann

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 10:49 PM

Let me guess is it a cappuccino machine?.

:D

#209 Defective

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 10:52 PM

Let me guess is it a cappuccino machine?.



Arrow: CAFFEINE!? WHERE?!

Edited by DefectiveTurret, 24 November 2012 - 10:53 PM.


#210 Golfmann

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 11:02 PM

I'm like the only person who drinks coffee in a five mile radius....

#211 ziomalQ

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 11:21 PM

Join the dark side, we have cookies.

#212 Jaylex

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 11:29 PM

Fuck that Ziomal, We have COFFEEEEEEE!!

#213 Golfmann

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 11:30 PM

Fuck that Ziomal, We have COFFEEEEEEE!!

This is me:

Posted Image

#214 FaffleMaster

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 11:31 PM

Ah, I see Tom is being all useful and shit XD. Is there anything I can do at the moment?

#215 Tom_Tiara

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 11:54 PM

I love being all USEFUL and SHIT. OuO

Edited by Tom_EN, 24 November 2012 - 11:55 PM.


#216 FaffleMaster

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 11:55 PM

It is a very good thing to be.

#217 Volvonski

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Posted 24 November 2012 - 11:58 PM

Just found a picture that practically describes how i envision my character:

Posted Image

Edited by Volvonski, 25 November 2012 - 12:00 AM.


#218 High Orbit

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Posted 25 November 2012 - 12:15 AM

While that's true its still annoying knowing that my character has the ability to stay alive for over 2000 years, is a master at arcane warfare and the last paladin of an ancient empire, only to have some villain come over and basically kill him with the single touch of a hoof(regardless of how many times said villain can use power).


I suddenly feel that my OC is the least OP of all the villains now :/

#219 Jaylex

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Posted 25 November 2012 - 12:21 AM

I'm pretty sure they'd all be the same Orbit. Just because yours seems weak, that doesn't mean the author can't make him badass.

#220 High Orbit

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Posted 25 November 2012 - 12:22 AM

Merp. I never intended for him to be on the front lines, but is the author wills it...

GO FOR IT.

#221 FaffleMaster

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Posted 25 November 2012 - 12:31 AM

There are many different classes of villain OPness.

They could be strong, but unskilled...

or weak but skilled....

or any other combination.

Even if a character is "weak" doesn't mean he isn't powerful.

#222 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 25 November 2012 - 12:36 AM

^ this.

If Trade Place is a villain, he is OP not in strength, but his ability to convince who he pleases to do his bidding.

Each villain (or good guy) Will have strengths, and weaknesses, but with villains, their boundaries are more pronounced, and their limitations seem higher than the heroes, when really the hero just has a lot of potential. (usually how it goes, correct me if I'm wrong).

#223 FaffleMaster

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Posted 25 November 2012 - 12:39 AM

You are correct.

Have a cookie.

#224 greebster

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Posted 25 November 2012 - 08:26 AM

Because of some amazing work from Tom_EN and Fafflemaster, we have a really beautiful cover art being made. You can see the how it looks so far on the start of the thread.

#225 greebster

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Posted 26 November 2012 - 09:54 AM

I'll send chapter two for review soon, thanks pre-readers :)
If it seems as though there's a huge gap of time between each chapter, that'll be because I've been doing a 3D animation for college as well. Don't worry, I'm never giving up on this project :D

#226 Jaylex

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Posted 26 November 2012 - 09:59 AM

I'm never giving up on this project :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

Edited by TheDeathScorpion, 26 November 2012 - 10:00 AM.


#227 greebster

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Posted 26 November 2012 - 11:02 AM

beeeotiful! :D

#228 greebster

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Posted 26 November 2012 - 08:00 PM

Hmm, interesting. The poll disappeared, I'm sure I didn't delete them. Ah well, I got what I needed.

#229 Microburst

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Posted 26 November 2012 - 09:12 PM

Enough time left to join?

#230 greebster

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Posted 26 November 2012 - 09:13 PM

Enough time left to join?


yes indeed :)

#231 Microburst

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Posted 26 November 2012 - 09:36 PM

I really can't be bothered. Cancelling. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Edited by Microburst, 27 December 2012 - 12:56 PM.


#232 greebster

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Posted 26 November 2012 - 10:31 PM

aight ^^

#233 Golfmann

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 04:14 AM

Wen is neu chpter?

I'm so excited :3

#234 greebster

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 07:02 AM

Me too :D and I'm writing the thing XD

I promise to get more done today :)

Edited by Greebster, 27 November 2012 - 07:03 AM.


#235 Steampunk_Pony

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 07:05 AM

Ugh, did i really have to find this while i am in the progress of writing a story for my OC, and I haven't really gone into too much depth in her either so i don't want to mess stuff up... but oh well, lets do this!
im
Spoiler

ok, if you wanna read some of the story that she is in just ask, It is much easier to read it than for me to describe it so far in the bio.

Sorry if this seems jumbled. its 2AM and i need to slee[

Edited by Steampunk_Pony, 27 November 2012 - 07:10 AM.


#236 greebster

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 07:53 AM

Ugh, did i really have to find this while i am in the progress of writing a story for my OC, and I haven't really gone into too much depth in her either so i don't want to mess stuff up... but oh well, lets do this!
im [spoiler]Character Name: Aaron Star


Insane toy vendor? Yes!
ACCEPTED!
I'll just call you Erin Star instead, that should be OK, right?

Edited by Greebster, 27 November 2012 - 10:18 AM.


#237 Golfmann

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 10:04 PM

I promise to get more done today :)

This is what I think, then take a procrastination to the brain.

#238 greebster

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 10:39 PM

what Golfmann said, creativity comes in dregs, distractions come in pints.

#239 greebster

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 12:35 AM

Chapter two is in the pre-reading stage. After which it comes back to the workbench where I make the required adjustments and finally upload it here :P

#240 Steampunk_Pony

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 03:44 AM

Insane toy vendor? Yes!
ACCEPTED!
I'll just call you Erin Star instead, that should be OK, right?

Thank you very much, and Yes, that is fine. (it is what everypony else calls her)

#241 Virelen

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 04:06 AM

Character Name: Virelen
Nickname(s): Vire
Race: Unicorn
Cutie Mark: Book with a pencil
Special Skill: Writing
Description of OC:
Posted Image
Bio: Virelen has had a silent and peaceful life, living by herself except for her pet cat. She spent most of her days writing and reading. She is timid and does not talk much, and also does not like to fight with others. She will fight if she must, but tries to stay out of battles.
Favourite Weapon: Iron hammer, although she wishes to not have to use it.

I wasn't gonna add my OC but then I thought, eh, why not :P

#242 greebster

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 10:50 AM

An amazing OC you have there (creeper voice). I can see how your character might be involved in the story already! ACCEPTED :D

#243 Virelen

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Posted 01 December 2012 - 01:46 AM

An amazing OC you have there (creeper voice). I can see how your character might be involved in the story already! ACCEPTED :D

Posted Image

#244 greebster

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Posted 01 December 2012 - 07:48 AM

:D
Sorry if I'm taking so long with the story. I'll admit that I may be procrastinating a bit, but it is more down to having taken time to have inspiration come to mind. I am also in search of a job to help me get some money before i head off to University, it's not as easy as people make out. Just to let you all know, chapter two is written, I'm currently in the middle of revising and fixing it up. If I could choose, I would work on this story all the time because it is what I love to do. I've made a promise not to give up and so I am keeping that promise, my imagination has been dribbling with new ideas for this anyway. Thanks to those who are helping or have helped, you've all done a great job. All I must say now is: onward with the fun!

#245 hxfthxft

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Posted 01 December 2012 - 10:20 AM

Can't wait i wanna read it!

Edited by hxfthxft, 01 December 2012 - 10:20 AM.


#246 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 01 December 2012 - 10:33 AM

I know how hard getting a job is greeb, I only got one today after a few months of searching, but be patient, and make sure it's YOUR phone number on the resume, you don't wanna lose as many opportunities as I did that way. Either way, can't wait for chapter two,. but be sure to take your time! Don't do it quickly, do it right.

#247 greebster

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Posted 01 December 2012 - 02:39 PM

Thanks dtgen :) I did make the phone number mistake a few times before, that was down to my mobile number having changed :)



#248 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 12:37 AM

GREEEEEBSTEEEEEER I'm going to have to start whipping you if I don't see a chapter soon!

#249 Tom_Tiara

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 12:39 AM

GREEEEEBSTEEEEEER I'm going to have to start whipping you if I don't see a chapter soon!


Oooh! Kinky!

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#250 Volvonski

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 12:49 AM

Give him time, he's dealing with other things as well you know(college project being one of them).

#251 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 01:15 AM

Just kidding around volvo, it's all good.

#252 Golfmann

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 01:56 AM

I would like to quote my last quote (jokingly of course. Take as much time as you need greeb.)

wen iz dee nex oopdat m8?

#253 greebster

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 02:40 PM

Hey guys :)
I'm pretty much done with the second chapter, now I'm currently waiting on the pre-readers to give their assessments :)

Admittedly, I've learned a lot from having people point out my mistakes, it has built on my knowledge as a writer and what to do to make an interesting story for you guys. I thank you all for putting up with the wait. I'll have it uploaded before Christmas, that I promise.

GREEEEEBSTEEEEEER I'm going to have to start whipping you if I don't see a chapter soon!


I would like that.

Posted Image

#254 greebster

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 05:47 PM

Chapter one is pretty much done with editing, so I've re-uploaded it :D

#255 onlyrainbowdash

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 06:22 PM

is it too late to add a character?

#256 greebster

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 07:02 PM

Nope, keep adding OC's people :D


#257 Jaylex

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 10:40 PM

I would like that.

Posted Image

:o I Know that Critic! And I'm pretty sure the new chapter will be released when I'm down at Caloundra. No internet there, but there is a beach.

#258 greebster

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 10:59 PM

Not to worry. It will still be there when you return :)

#259 onlyrainbowdash

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Posted 08 December 2012 - 06:15 PM

Is it too late to add my OC?

#260 FaffleMaster

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Posted 08 December 2012 - 06:18 PM

IT'S NEVER TOO LATE.

#261 greebster

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Posted 08 December 2012 - 06:25 PM

What faff said ^_^

And I say this from a stagecoach gold, finest public transport ever! It has wifi

#262 Tom_Tiara

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Posted 08 December 2012 - 11:45 PM

I see you have updated the cover image :D
I'll try to get more work done tonight :P

#263 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 12:51 AM

Awesomesauce! I have tried out Photoshop and decided it is my new favourite ^-^ one day I'll get somewhere with my art skills. Meanwhile you and Fafflemaster have shown real artist qualities. I thank you for taking the time to do this for not only me but for the rest of us.

#264 Golfmann

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:46 AM

Awesomesauce!

Posted Image

#265 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 07:35 AM

That was beautiful Golf XD

#266 jamiejibba2259

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 12:12 PM

alright this is me jamiejibba and i write fanfics (witch i am terrible at XD)
even though i have came up with great idea's i have not been able to express them till i found out about "Harmonosphere"
so HERE is my OC characters that i hope to get into awsome this story line.

character name: tinker Tankering
nickname(s): "the crazy bolt guy",
race: unicorn
cutie mark: a spanner and electrical bolts.
special skill: meteor blitz can make some useful weapons and armor to protect
ponies from certain types of magic such as ice, fire, electrical like magic, ect.
he was the inventor of the still in progress "nut'n bolts cannon" witch is a highly dangerous e weapon kind of like a shotgun somehow.
location:????? unknown?????
Bio: Tinker is a inventor of many strange machines , weapons,and some useless stuff
infact he loved making new mechanisms so much he went "loco in the coco (crazy)"
and had to be put in the canterlot dungions to sorta go back to sane...
he finaly did get sane again... as long as NOPONY reminds him of his past... except inventing
as that is his talent. so NOPONY reminds him of when he was crazy till this day.
desc: err.... he always wears black robes so nopony can see his face... as he is.... butt ugly...
but other than that he is a realy nice guy
(if u dont like this one you can just ask me to write another one... that is way better than this one as it is comepletely and utterly....BAD)(i realy got to practise this more so i dont just put random stuff down that i think of from my mind...... kind of like breaking the 4th barrier i guess... is that possible? lemme try it... nope didn't work i feel like a idiot now :P

#267 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 12:41 PM

I like your spontaneous thinking, so I must say ACCEPTED! I can see you as our weapons and armour blacksmith. Thanks for your character :) I'll put him to good use!

#268 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:38 PM

I'm gonna make an oc for this today, for sure.

#269 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:44 PM

Sweet :)

#270 hxfthxft

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:50 PM

I want moar :(

#271 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:58 PM

Moar is on its way.

#272 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 03:04 PM

Hey Greeb, can I make a villain and a hero?

#273 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 03:21 PM

Maybe just one of them if it's ok :)

One OC per person :D

#274 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 03:21 PM

Owlrighty then, and now I choose between evil or good.

#275 Golfmann

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 03:31 PM

Owlrighty then, and now I choose between evil or good.

Villains are good. You just don't know it. Your guy could be evil to start but turn later and die heroically allowing the heroes to escape from the enemy.

It's an idea :3

#276 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 03:34 PM

Eh, that happens way too often in fiction, I don't want to see this fic having almost every villain change good at some point.

#277 Tom_Tiara

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 03:34 PM

Villains are good. You just don't know it. Your guy could be evil to start but turn later and die heroically allowing the heroes to escape from the enemy.

It's an idea :3


*cough*So Original*cough*

#278 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 03:36 PM

Eh, that happens way too often in fiction, I don't want to see this fic having almost every villain change good at some point.

*cough*So Original*cough*

Bam.

#279 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 03:52 PM

Well, all characters are unique, some aren't bad but are misled or making the wrong decision. But the choice for your OC is up to you :3

#280 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 04:04 PM

Posted Image

This is amazing! Thanks to Tom_EN and Fafflemaster for this fantastic work of art.

Edited by Greebster, 09 December 2012 - 04:05 PM.


#281 Haxorizer145

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 04:28 PM

I actually altered a little Diamond Digger design. Here it is: p2dpeos2n

#282 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 04:32 PM

Ok :) well edit it to your original OC post because I refer to your OCs at some point.

#283 Haxorizer145

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 04:51 PM

Edited.

#284 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 04:52 PM

Danke :D

#285 Tom_Tiara

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 05:12 PM

I feel awesome being one of the few that knows chapter 2's title XD

#286 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 05:18 PM

Lolz, well it is almost done :) I am hoping to get a response from some of my pre-readers so that I know what to change. But I'm currently editing ch2 anyways because of what's already been said :)

It is all looking good peeps ^¤^

#287 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 05:42 PM

Dis gun be gud

Edited by Greebster, 09 December 2012 - 05:42 PM.


#288 Golfmann

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 05:45 PM

Posted Image

This is amazing! Thanks to Tom_EN and Fafflemaster for this fantastic work of art.

OMYLAWDY!

I look like a total badass in the shadows xD

#289 Tom_Tiara

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 05:51 PM

Here is a top secret sneak peak at chapter 3

Spoiler


#290 Golfmann

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 05:58 PM

Here is a top secret sneak peak at chapter 3

Spoiler

Wow well done!
Posted Image

#291 Divinyll

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 06:59 PM

I hope I'm not too late to post an OC for you.



Character Name: Divine Light
Nickname(s): Shadow
Race: Unicorn

Cutie Mark: A white eight-pointed star. Diagonal points are half the size of vertical/horizontal points

Special Skill: She see past the darkness and brings out the light in others. However, there is a lot of mystery around her because she typically only goes out at night. (could also be associated with her style of magic)

Description of OC: Divine is a tall pony, a bit taller than Princess Luna, bu not bigger than Princess Celestia. Her coat is a light lavender, like Twilight's but much lighter of a color. Her mane is a light blue. When straight, her mane reaches midway down her legs, but typically it isshaggy and tangled, so it looks relatively short. Her tail is pretty much the in the same condition. Rarity would have a feild day with her. Her eyes are dark blue, narrow and tired looking.

Personality: She is a quiet, shy pony. She rarely even speaks, seeing no reason to. If she had more friends then she'd talk more, but being a nittime pony she finds it harder to find another pony compatible to her lifestyle. Not that she's looking for friends, she he completely happy living an isolated life. She is a passive pony, she never lets anything offend her or hurt her; it helps to only look for the good in others and herself. She tries her best to avoid saying or thinking something negative. She wants to always keep a clear head and conscious so her judgement other others and thing is not clouded. She is definately an optimist.

Bio: She grew up in Manehattan. she was a blank flank for quite sometime. How she actually got her cutiemark was because she was defending another blank flank from four snobby fillies how had cutiemarks. She managed to completely change the way those poines saw blank flanks, letting she how much potential they had, thus showing the light to others. It was quite ironic to get a cutiemark while defending a blankflank. She didn't even realize it until she was told.

Over the years she became a nighttime pony, having been in the daylight since she was a filly. She wanted to she how the other half lived, finding that half was a major overstatement. However lonely the night looked, she enjoyed and enjoys every bit of it. She move to Ponyville looking for the perfect place to enjoy the night. Ponyville was it. Then she started focusing on her magic. She's been studing magic and doing various things around Ponyville since then. Being older than Twilight, she has been studying longer, so she is a little better. But no pony in Ponyville really knows it due to her favoring the night.

Favourite Weapon: She is not a fighter, but she'd use words and magic. If push comes to shove, she'll panic and be easily defeated.

#292 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 09:27 PM

Here is a top secret sneak peak at chapter 3

Spoiler


*Gulp* naw, it's cool bro ^-^

@ divine ACCEPTED! Your character could be very important indeed. All of your characters are important, mind you :)

#293 Divinyll

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 10:02 PM

Awesome. Just awesome. Now I will try my own hoof at making a fanfiction. In a month when I've got a good stroyline and plot...

#294 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 10:06 PM

Ya know what, if you need any more help with your pre-reading, I'd be very happy to help, I already have quite a bit of experience with fic editing & writing, so if you need another person I'm here to help!

#295 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 10:10 PM

well thanks for offering dtgen :D I'll add you to the list

#296 hxfthxft

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 10:20 PM

Posted Image

#297 greebster

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Posted 09 December 2012 - 11:17 PM

Epic Handclap FTW!

#298 Divinyll

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Posted 10 December 2012 - 12:53 AM

Posted Image
Absolutely shocking brilliance!

#299 greebster

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Posted 10 December 2012 - 01:02 AM

lol, Gifgiggle XD

#300 Guardian Selene

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Posted 10 December 2012 - 04:57 AM

Character Name: Northern Crescent
Nickname(s): North
Race: Pegasus
Cutie Mark: Shield with a Crescent Moon
Special Skill: When a friend is in mortal danger, North gets an adrenaline rush. The rush stops the feeling of pain until the rush weres off and can push her body passed its limits. The down side to this is North will feel double the pain, become eaisly tired, and her muscles are in a weakened state. The recover time depends on how far she pushed herself and what injuries she received from the fight.
Description of OC:
Spoiler



Bio: North was born in Armstrong City, the capital of the Lunar Republic. North was orphaned at the age of three, because her parents died in the Red Moon conflict. North had recurring nightmares of her parents dying. The orphanage staff told North that Luna would protect her from bad dreams. The bad dreams went away and North began to worship Luna. She stayed at the orphanage until she joined the Armstrong guard (National Guard basically). She is sent to Kynareth for basic training. She is later placed into the newly formed LSTS (Lunar Special Tactics Squadron). The LSTS commander assigns her and her squad to special training to prepare them for scouting in Equestria. Once in Equestria, North's squad set up a base camp in the Everfree forest.

Personality: Adventurous, loyalty to her friends and squadmates, brave, protective, and no quick to trust
Favourite Weapon: A recurve bow made from Lost Wood's mahogany.

Character Name: Starlight
Nickname(s): Star
Race: Pegasus
Cutie Mark: A medical plus on top of a full moon
Special Skill: Starlight is a natural expert at healing ponies. She makes do with what she has to heal other ponies.
Description of OC:
Spoiler


Bio: Starlight was born in Armstrong City and has no memory of her parents. She grew up in the same orphanage as North. When Starlight was a young teen, she'd help out at the nearby hospital. Starlight saw the sad and wounded soldiers back from the front lines of the war with the Bartons. She tried her best to heal them both physically and mentally. She offen told jokes to get ponies to smile. Starlight joined the Armstrong guard at the same time as North. Starlight was later recruited into the LSTS by North, but that took some convincing. Starlight didn't like the thought of killing other ponies. We only will be spying on the Equestrians and we can afford muffins every month won her over. The Equestria training and Equestria she enjoyed because of the warmer climate and trees.

Personality: Humorous, Curious, intelligent just doesn't show it, and quick to trust
Favourite Weapon: A dart gun, because everypony hates needles.

Additonal information:
North, Starlight, and everypony from the Republic have four small fangs (Canine teeth). After centuries of eating meat, the Republic ponies evolved to have four pointy teeth to help rip and tear meat while chewing.

Edited by Commander Nanook, 12 December 2012 - 03:49 PM.



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