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#1 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 02:38 AM

I've recently been getting back into making OCs and drawing them, and I've seen a rise in...let's just say bad OCs. The main purpose of this thread is to make your OC's appearance fit in the show's style.

This is not a thread to ask for help on your OC's backstory.

I'll be taking absolutely all OCs in for critiquing. Also admins, please tell me if this thread is okay for this forum and if not, please move it to the correct one.

 

What not to do:

princess_neon_boom___new_design__by_neko


Edited by Jasplosion, 21 April 2013 - 02:46 AM.


#2 343 Guilty Sparkle

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 02:44 AM

Technically, This is the kind of issue that is taken care of in the RP help and questions subforum in the RP forum. To help develop the OC in general to determine if it is OP, Canon breaking, or just plain outright stupid; as well as the development of the backstory for any OC if requested by the user.

Edited by adwrynn, 05 October 2012 - 02:46 AM.


#3 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 02:52 AM

I was meaning for this thread to be more of a guide to the OC's visuals (e.g. does it look like it would fit in the canon) to eliminate the amount of red and black alicorns with zebra stripes.

#4 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 02:55 AM

Oh good! Could you please tell me what you think about this?
Posted Image
It's my OC Hotwire, and I may as well stick it here

#5 Sky Jazz

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 02:58 AM

Sounds like....... An okay thread maybe... Don't have a picture on hand, go by my DP?

By the way, his cutie mark is the same as rainbow dash, just recolored, The cloud is a dark grey, the bolt is a solid yellow, like lightning

There is a better picture on my profile also

Edited by Thunder Strike, 05 October 2012 - 02:58 AM.


#6 343 Guilty Sparkle

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:01 AM

Ahhhh like ponymaker Critiquing. ^_^ Coolbeans. Have fun. If someone needs an opinion on backstory, or any other character development, Point them to make a post in the RP help and questions sub-forum.

#7 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:05 AM

Posted Image
Alright. first off, both metal wings and a broken horn? Try to just choose between unicorn, pegasi and earth pony rather than using an alicorn. Now for the rest of the OC. Grey hair doesn't look good on a pony, try using pastel colours such as these:

Posted Image

Pastel colours will make your OC look like it could actually be seen as a background pony (asides from being an alicorn). The mane and tail match up, and that is a plus. Try to avoid clashing with colours, as the purple in the OC's eye doesn't fit well with the grey.

Thanks for asking to be critiqued and I hope I was not too harsh.

#8 Ocean Ice

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:13 AM

Oh good! Could you please tell me what you think about this?
Posted Image
It's my OC Hotwire, and I may as well stick it here


Choose a race besides an alicorn (broken). My personal preference is pegasi, but since this is your OC that is your choice. The pastel colors is a good steer, but keep in mind complementary colors when you make an OC. For the eye color, I would recommend a light blue or a steel. The mane is fine for me after I mentally subtract the iron wings. Get rid of the iron wings.

((Hope you don't mind a second opinion.))

Edited by Ocean Ice, 05 October 2012 - 03:15 AM.


#9 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:29 AM

All right, thanks!

#10 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:30 AM

Sounds like....... An okay thread maybe... Don't have a picture on hand, go by my DP?

By the way, his cutie mark is the same as rainbow dash, just recolored, The cloud is a dark grey, the bolt is a solid yellow, like lightning

There is a better picture on my profile also


Keep in mind I have absolutely nothing against you.

This OC is nearly exactly like Rainbow Dash but recoloured, and that is a bad thing. First off, change that hair. There are a billion trillion gazillion metric tons of OCs with that exact hair. As for the coat, the colours complement each other pretty well, but it could be a bit brighter.

I don't really care about cutie marks because your OC's talent is more something you ask for critiquement in the rp forums. All in all, I give it a mediocre/10

Edited by Jasplosion, 05 October 2012 - 03:32 AM.


#11 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:38 AM

Okay, I'm gonna try this again

(Right now I'm trying to develop a pegasus OC, so this thread is great :))

Posted Image

#12 Virelen

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:44 AM

how does this look?

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#13 Ocean Ice

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:46 AM

Just for the fun, what are your thoughts on my canon-OC hybrid Rapidfire? He is a wonderbolt that is mentioned, but has no screen time.

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#14 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:46 AM

Posted Image


Great improvement for great justice. I can see that you really took my advice, +1 charisma.
The only real problems with this one is that it is a bit tall, and the cutie mark kind of clashes with the coat. Other than that, I don't see much else you could really do to make this fit into the show more (plus it looks like it's from an older generation which is badass).

#15 jimme neutron corndog

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:55 AM

Heres my OC Blu trat.Posted Image

#16 Rhythmition

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:03 AM

I have to post Flaming on here. What's a thread without a pyro?



Flaming 2.0
Spoiler


there are other drawings of him I just can't find any right now.

oh and Moon Mist
Spoiler

Edited by Flaming Night, 05 October 2012 - 04:04 AM.


#17 EonLight

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:08 AM

Does it have to be from the Ponymaker?
Posted Image

#18 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:19 AM

Okay, did another quick revision

Posted Image

#19 castle13oblivion

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:22 AM

does the OC have to have a background story, or can a work in progress make the cut?

#20 FaffleMaster

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:23 AM

You just need to show a peectar

#21 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:23 AM

does the OC have to have a background story, or can a work in progress make the cut?

It can be a work in progress, for example the pegasus I keep on posting is something I'm working on. She doesn't even have a name yet (I'm thinking maybe Painterly or something like that)

#22 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:28 AM

Heres my OC Blu trat.Posted Image


This looks pretty good, the mane and tail match up well, and the colours complement each other well. I can't find anything to fault really.


Spoiler


Spoiler


Flaming: I really hate red and black OCs. You never see any ponies with black coats in the show . It really goes against the show's pastel style. Try using a dark grey instead.

Moon Mist: This OC would look great if it had a light blue coat. Also, the tail doesn't match up well to the hair, so I suggest fixing that.


Does it have to be from the Ponymaker?
Posted Image


This OC delights me and I love everything about it. There is literally nothing wrong with it and I could see it in the background of a season 3 episode and not bat an eyelid.



does the OC have to have a background story, or can a work in progress make the cut?


If you want to get your OC's background story critiqued,go to the roleplay section of the forums. This is a thread for critiquing your OC's appearance

Posted Image


That cutie mark fits a lot better.

#23 Rhythmition

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:41 AM

why did you skip Ocean's?

also thunderlane is black.Posted Image

#24 Sanctussaevio

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:51 AM

why did you skip Ocean's?

also thunderlane is black.Posted Image


That's a pastel grey.
Not to mention he has a very light mane and eye color to contrast it.

Sorry about critiquing in your critique thread, but this is just a bad OC.

Edited by Sanctussaevio, 05 October 2012 - 04:52 AM.


#25 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:52 AM

why did you skip Ocean's?

also thunderlane is black.


1. Because I got like 7 replies and I didn't see it there
2. Very very dark grey, not black.

That's a pastel grey.
Not to mention he has a very light mane and eye color to contrast it.

Sorry about critiquing in your critique thread, but this is just a bad OC.


I don't mind Caventh ^^

Posted Image


Looks like it could be an official character, showstyle/10

Posted Image


I'll be honest with you, those colours clash horribly. Lavender, green and lightish darkish blue do not mix. Try and use complementary colours.

Edited by Jasplosion, 05 October 2012 - 04:53 AM.


#26 Caventh

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 04:55 AM

I don't mind Caventh ^^


Whoa whoa whoa, don't bring me into this.

#27 Linx the Lynx

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:00 AM

Okay, for my pony I used Super ponymaker 2013
Her name is Amethyst.
Spoiler

Edited by Spookcore, 05 October 2012 - 05:00 AM.


#28 Stev

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:03 AM

Holy crap this thread is getting a TON of traffic. Anyways, wondering if you could give an opinion on deesh poneh:
Spoiler

No, there was no ponymaker involved, and yes, I realize the legs are a bit thin

Edited by Mr_Stev, 05 October 2012 - 05:04 AM.


#29 Caventh

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:10 AM

Posted Image

It's name is IMDRUNKANDDONTKNOWWHATIAMDOING.JPEG

#30 Sanctussaevio

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:14 AM

Holy crap this thread is getting a TON of traffic. Anyways, wondering if you could give an opinion on deesh poneh:

Spoiler

No, there was no ponymaker involved, and yes, I realize the legs are a bit thin


SEE HOW OBNOXIOUS THIS IS?
IT REMINDS ME OF YOUR COLOR SCHEME!

#31 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:19 AM

Whoa whoa whoa, don't bring me into this.


Damn, I saw you were reading the thread so I got you two mixed up. Sorry.


Okay, for my pony I used Super ponymaker 2013
Her name is Amethyst.

Spoiler


I feel like an idiot because I looked up super ponymaker 2013.

Anyway, the main thing I find wrong with Amethyst is that her colour scheme is a bit dark. The OC is nice, but it just needs to be a bit brighter. Oh and also pointy horns. Pointy horns should be reserved for the Princesses.


Spoiler



The coat is too dark. If you absolutely must use a dark coat, try using a lighter pastel grey. The light cyan and purple clash badly. Combine this with the ear-stud-thingies and the metal bands around its legs and no offence, but it looks like a ponified version of a 'scene' kid (e.g. the ones with piercings, and neon streaks through their hair). All in all, this needs a lot of work before it could fit into the world of FiM.

Posted Image

It's name is IMDRUNKANDDONTKNOWWHATIAMDOING.JPEG


Posted Image

Edited by Jasplosion, 05 October 2012 - 05:21 AM.


#32 Linx the Lynx

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:26 AM

I feel like an idiot because I looked up super ponymaker 2013.

Anyway, the main thing I find wrong with Amethyst is that her colour scheme is a bit dark. The OC is nice, but it just needs to be a bit brighter. Oh and also pointy horns. Pointy horns should be reserved for the Princesses.

Posted Image

Edited by Spookcore, 05 October 2012 - 05:27 AM.


#33 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:28 AM

Holy crap this thread is getting a TON of traffic. Anyways, wondering if you could give an opinion on deesh poneh:

Spoiler

No, there was no ponymaker involved, and yes, I realize the legs are a bit thin

Mind if I give it a look? Right then, down to business!

When you are making a ponysona, you are basing it on you. When you make an OC, you add a little of your personality, and sometimes your personality isn't quite canon-style. It has, as sanct rather bluntly put it, an obnoxious colour scheme. The black, smacking right into a light blue and purple mane, just screams dissentry at you, and while you might have been going for this, somehow I don't think that's the case.

The next this that was brought to my attention was the bands, there are a bit too much, I have never yet seen a punk pony with spiked and chrome arm bands, and he had one on his rear leg? How, one might ask, does a pegasi put one there? armbands in themself aren't canon, but they can work if not screaming out dissonance at me.

Another, big thing. Piercings. They are... not pony. Nopony has ever, and will never in canon, get a piercing. Ponies have not quite advanced to the point where tattoos and piercings are commonplace, much less the gothic, punk rocker look your pony is sporting. The ponies are living in a perfect world ruled by an immortal deity who converses with them regularly at parties, there is no need for rebellion, as of yet.

Pretty much, this OC is not canon. I'm never suggesting you are a terrible person, or stupid, or any thing, hell, if I was I'd be thrown off this server on my ear before I could edit this post. But sometimes you need to tone it down a notch.

(Jas, forgive me, I couldn't resist, please tell me if you want this post editedand gone. Sort of seems like I'm invading your parade... thingy. Just tell me if you need it gone.)

#34 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:34 AM

Posted Image


I would respond with an image but I don't want to derail my own thread.

Alright, I will redo the critique.

Anyway, the main thing I find wrong awesome with Amethyst is that her colour scheme is a bit dark which is amazing and beautiful. The OC is nice, but it just needs to be a bit brighter and I love it and it's beautiful. Oh and also pointy horns. Pointy horns should be reserved for the Princesses. Pointy horns are amazing and you can use them because they suit everyone

(Jas, forgive me, I couldn't resist, please tell me if you want this post editedand gone. Sort of seems like I'm invading your parade... thingy. Just tell me if you need it gone.)


Posted Image

Just kidding, I don't mind.

#35 Sanctussaevio

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:41 AM

Alright, I've judged enough without putting my own creations up for all to see.
So now, I present, MY OC

Spoiler


Her name is Eyelashes Extravagant and shes half unicrn and half pegasus (but not an alicorn because thatd be so uncool of me) and half zebra but her zbra mom was an abusive bitch and I HATE HER and every night she goes home to reaply all the eyeliner she lsot from all the criyng she does because everyone bullies her all the time
Sowhaddya think? XD LOL

YOLO

#36 Microburst

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:43 AM

Is mah OC alright?

Spoiler


Dear god Sanctuss, you made that??

Edited by Microburst, 05 October 2012 - 05:46 AM.


#37 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:44 AM

sact, You have murdered me.

Edited by RoyalInBlue, 05 October 2012 - 05:44 AM.


#38 Ocean Ice

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:51 AM

Sanct's OC has made my eyes burn a second time today.

#39 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:53 AM

Posted Image


Posted Image


Posted Image


Seems pretty good, the brown balances out the neon enough to make it not look weird. I don't know what the heck that cutie mark is supposed to be though.

#40 Sanctussaevio

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:57 AM

Okay, Ill hand it to ya, Eyelash wasnt my best effort.

But this is my most recent OC, and I run an ask tumbr with her and everything! You should check it out X D LOL

Spoiler


Behold! Princess Neon BOOM
http://nekomellow.tumblr.com/
x DDD <3 EL OH LEL

YOYO
(You Only Yodel Once)

Edited by Sanctussaevio, 05 October 2012 - 06:03 AM.


#41 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 05:59 AM

Okay, Ill hand it to ya, Eyelash wasnt my best effort.

But this is my most recent OC, and I run an ask tumbr with her and everything! You should check it out X D LOL

Spoiler


Behold! Princess Neon BOOM
http://nekomellow.tumblr.com/
x DDD <3 EL OH LEL

YOYO


I've seen that OC before and I'm not even going to comment on its awfulness. But I will mention that more art gets done for that OC by the fans of it than it does by the actual creator.

Edited by Jasplosion, 05 October 2012 - 06:01 AM.


#42 Microburst

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 06:04 AM

Seems pretty good, the brown balances out the neon enough to make it not look weird. I don't know what the heck that cutie mark is supposed to be though.

An arrow. Isn't it obvious?

#43 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 06:07 AM

@sanct No. That was you? Small world!

EDIT- I'm a sucker.

Edited by RoyalInBlue, 05 October 2012 - 06:07 AM.


#44 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 06:11 AM

An arrow. Isn't it obvious?


I mean what the cutie mark is supposed to represent, Of course I know it's an arrow :P

#45 Ms.Harshwhinny

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 06:38 AM

This is a old pic of my Oc the one on the right btw...
and obviously you can tell who the other is...

Spoiler

Edited by AcidRain, 05 October 2012 - 06:39 AM.


#46 mattbot12

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 07:12 AM

Can you critique mine

OC: Storm Flower

Cutie Mark: Flower (its a prototype give me some advice about it)

Thanks


Posted Image

V.2
Posted Image

Edited by mattbot12, 05 October 2012 - 08:03 AM.


#47 Ocean Ice

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 07:19 AM

The information contained in that post is nonexistent. Do you want help building an OC?

#48 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 07:39 AM

Posted Image


There's not much to say about this OC seeing as most of it is covered by a wonderbolt costume, but I will try and critique it anyway.

The green and blue don't usually complement each other very well, but it seems to work okay with this OC.

...That's it. There isn't much other than that I can really say.

Can you critique mine

OC: Storm Flower

Cutie Mark: Flower (its a prototype give me some advice about it)

Thanks


Posted Image


First off, that hair is waaaay overused. There are dozens of hairstyles available in generalzoi's pone creator, why use Vinyl Scratch's?

The mane and tail work decently enough with each other, so that's a plus. The colours, however, do not. Green and red should be reserved for Christmas.The colour of the coat is pastel-like, which is good. I have no idea what that cutie mark is supposed to be. All in all, your OC's coat is good, but the mane and tail hair colours need work, and you need to pick a better mane.

#49 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 08:56 AM

Can you critique mine

OC: Storm Flower

Cutie Mark: Flower (its a prototype give me some advice about it)

Thanks


Posted Image

V.2
Posted Image


Gahk you could have posted a new reply instead of making me double post D: .

Anyway, this is an improvement, although I think you could choose a better eye colour. The tail and mane don't match up well either. Also, why does your OC always look so bored? I dunno, just an observation.

#50 TrulySerperior13

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 09:57 AM

Posted Image
This is Amber, I added the accessories because I want her to be different from the other OCs.
Please rate it, thanks.

#51 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 10:11 AM

Posted Image
This is Amber, I added the accessories because I want her to be different from the other OCs.
Please rate it, thanks.


First off, adding pointless accesories will not make your OC unique. If you make your OC without using Mane 6 hair and good colour schemes, they will look unique.

The coat colour is not good. The hair and mane, however, are. Try to avoid giving your OC red eyes unless it really suits them. If I were you, I would have given her a different eye colour, but that may be just me. If you are sure you want those accessories, don't make her a pegasus. If she is a pegasus, she shouldn't be wearing a watch or glasses, because they would just fly off.

All in all, the things that need to be changed are
1. the coat colour
2. the accessories need to go
3. the eye colour

#52 Sky Jazz

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 11:19 AM

Keep in mind I have absolutely nothing against you.

This OC is nearly exactly like Rainbow Dash but recoloured, and that is a bad thing. First off, change that hair. There are a billion trillion gazillion metric tons of OCs with that exact hair. As for the coat, the colours complement each other pretty well, but it could be a bit brighter.

I don't really care about cutie marks because your OC's talent is more something you ask for critiquement in the rp forums. All in all, I give it a mediocre/10


Just now reading this, lol, good thing I kept the pony make code, huh? :)

#53 Stev

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 02:51 PM

The coat is too dark. If you absolutely must use a dark coat, try using a lighter pastel grey. The light cyan and purple clash badly. Combine this with the ear-stud-thingies and the metal bands around its legs and no offence, but it looks like a ponified version of a 'scene' kid (e.g. the ones with piercings, and neon streaks through their hair). All in all, this needs a lot of work before it could fit into the world of FiM.

Pretty much, this OC is not canon. I'm never suggesting you are a terrible person, or stupid, or any thing, hell, if I was I'd be thrown off this server on my ear before I could edit this post. But sometimes you need to tone it down a notch.


Lol I guess I should have seen this coming because I knew from the start that he doesn't fit into the canon whatsoever xD Though I am incredibly grateful for the tips on the colors. I was never good at that kind of thing. About the metal bands and stuff... I have seen a few other OC's like that before, but in hindsight, yeah I took it WAY too far. I think it's mostly just because I am putting a bit of myself through the pony (though I probably would never wear purple and light blue at the same time), and I like wearing things all over my wrists and such.
Not mad that I screwed this one up. Not mad at all :D

Edited by Mr_Stev, 05 October 2012 - 02:51 PM.


#54 Microburst

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 03:41 PM

I mean what the cutie mark is supposed to represent, Of course I know it's an arrow :P

Gonna say! Going fast, hence the crazy mane.

#55 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 06:04 PM

Gonna say! Going fast, hence the crazy mane.


Ah I see

#56 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 07:34 PM

All right, I'm going to put my OC Flaming Arrow in (I didn't make this at all except the cutie mark, it was a pic I sorta adopted XD)

Posted Image

#57 jimme neutron corndog

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 07:43 PM

Im gonna critique it, if no one minds. 5 Colors? it looked good on rainbowdash, but grey coats arent good for 5 different colors ms paint cutie mark lulz

DAT FAIC

#58 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 07:48 PM

ms paint cutie mark lulz

DAT FAIC


I know, someday I'll get the time to make a better one

And since I'm here

Posted Image

I'm still developing my Pegasus OC, so I'm gonna put up a few models I'm gonna choose from

Edited by stardragon, 05 October 2012 - 07:50 PM.


#59 Karkat

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 07:59 PM

Posted Image
Firefeather of the Clan of Elements

#60 Squint

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 08:41 PM

What do you think of Cteno?

She's a good OC once her personality's in, but otherwise?

#61 castle13oblivion

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 11:29 PM

i have very few ideas about what to do, i think ill keep him as a blank flank until i can find a suitable cutie mark

Posted Image

Posted Image

Uploaded with ImageShack.us

Edited by castle13oblivion, 05 October 2012 - 11:54 PM.


#62 Ocean Ice

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 11:35 PM

Posted Image
Firefeather of the Clan of Elements


Not a fan of the body colour or the alicorn wings on a pegasus. The creme and red mane is a bit... Interesting to say it nicely.

#63 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 02:21 AM

Im gonna critique it, if no one minds. 5 Colors? it looked good on rainbowdash, but grey coats arent good for 5 different colors ms paint cutie mark lulz

DAT FAIC


This isn't a critique, this is a mockery. Be kind, and actually have reasons. You presented your reason for the mane, but simply laughed at her cutie mark. What's wrong with ms paint any way, it's free. installed and a good program to learn on, and the makr presented itself rather well.

As the other person stated, though, the mane colour rather clashes with the lack thereof in the body, try finding a body colour that matches the mane & tail better, although I suppose metaphorically, an ash grey coat rather suits the flaming mane somewhat. I was never a fan of the wet mane look, but due to bias I will leave that alone. Also, as the above person stated, the whole RD thing is nice, but you should try for your own look in future, it was nice, but it didn't quite meet canon standard.

(God, I'm talking out my ass as though I know what the standards are, feel free to ignore this!)

#64 Golfmann

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 02:24 AM

Wham bam slam dunk. Cutie mark still in progress but special talent is (someting) magic more of Twilight than Trixie magic.
Posted Image

#65 Ocean Ice

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 02:26 AM

i have very few ideas about what to do, i think ill keep him as a blank flank until i can find a suitable cutie mark

Posted Image

Posted Image

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The OC's mane and body color looks good, but get rid of the alicorn wings and the metal accessory.

#66 Vargouille

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 03:56 AM

Here ya go! This is quite an old picture of him, I forget the original artist, so, sorry to them, but being an old picture there are things that I don't use anymore, one being that I have now removed the headband from him whenever I use him, also the fact that I use him as a unicorn now.
Spoiler

Edited by Spooky Vargouille, 06 October 2012 - 04:02 AM.


#67 Caventh

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 03:58 AM

Here ya go! His name is Django, and this is quite an old picture of him, I forget the original artist, so, sorry to them, but being an old picture there are things that I don't use anymore, one being that I have now removed the headband from him whenever I use him, also the fact that I use him as a unicorn now.

Spoiler


False! OC means Original Character! This is just the main character from Sunflower Shooter Advance in pony form!

Edited by Just Caventh, 06 October 2012 - 03:59 AM.


#68 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 04:37 AM

PREPARE FOR A FLIPPING LONG REPLY


Posted Image


Interesting, I don't know about the mane colours, they remind me of candy corn. On another note a candy corn OC sounds awesome. From what I can see, this is an MS Paint recolour of Twilight Sparkle? Also, what is 'mybannermaker.com' and why are you making ponies with it? Jeez, I'm getting pretty off topic. Anyway, this looks like a solid OC, maybe get rid of that light pink in the mane because it looks kind of odd, and swap it out for something else.

Posted Image

I'm still developing my Pegasus OC, so I'm gonna put up a few models I'm gonna choose from


Interesting. I kind of like this, but at the same time, the purple and cyan mane doesn't look very good when combined with that coat colour. The mane and tail could match up a bit better.

Also, pointy ears. They should be reserved for Diamond Dogs, they look weird on ponies.

Posted Image
Firefeather of the Clan of Elements


Be warned that I am not going to go soft on this OC.

Simply put, this OC is a Rainbow Dash recolour. The mane and tail are exactly the same as RD's. The red and white looks rather strange combined with that coat. The eye is grey, which is something you don't see much in FiM for good reason. Also, those are Alicorn wings, and as such they should be reserved for the Princesses. Also, I have no idea what the 'Clan of the elements' is, but it sounds like it's involved with the Elements of Harmony... I won't go into backstories though, as Ocean Ice has that covered.

i have very few ideas about what to do, i think ill keep him as a blank flank until i can find a suitable cutie mark

Posted Image




First of all, those hooves do not work on a pegasus. Those are the kind of hooves you see on Big Mac, not on Soarin' or Thunderlane. Secondly, those wings. If you want your OC to fit into the FiM universe, use regular wings. Switch out that tail for something that fits with the hair better. Basically, just remove those hooves and wings and change the tail, and you will have a solid-looking Pegasus OC.


Wham bam slam dunk. Cutie mark still in progress but special talent is (someting) magic more of Twilight than Trixie magic.
Posted Image


ASDFGHJKL;

Use a smaller picture next time, PLEASE! It's so large I had to open it in a new tab!

First of all, change that mane. It's way overdone, and there are many other manes to choose from. The colour scheme for the hair isn't all that great either.

Secondly, change that eye to a Stallion eye, because at the moment your OC looks very androgynous. Change the eye colour too, because green and lavender do not mix.

This OC is a male Vinyl Scratch recolour, which is also a bad thing. The horn looks strangely long, I'm not sure if it's just me or if you switched it out for a long one.

All in all, I give this a need a lot of improvement / 10

Posted Image


Just...please...enough mammoth-sized images....

So, did you make this OC or are you just using it as a Roleplay character?

Anyway I don't know what Anime/cartoon/manga/webcomic/book/whatever Django was originally from before being ponified, but this OC looks good enough. As it is a ponification, technically I would not count it as an OC. Uh, and especially if you didn't make the OC in the first place. If you did, great work, if you didn't, then *shrug* it's not an OC.

#69 Vargouille

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 04:42 AM

Just...please...enough mammoth-sized images....
So, did you make this OC or are you just using it as a Roleplay character?
Anyway I don't know what game Django was originally from before being ponified, but this OC looks good enough. As it is a ponification, technically I would not count it as an OC. Uh, and especially if you didn't make the OC in the first place. If you did, great work, if you didn't, then *shrug* it's not an OC.


Thank you for a well thought out reply, and I can't really help the huge image, that's simply the way the artist drew him, also, while there are hints of the unponified character, I have him diversified quite enough to be considered an OC, but I never consider any character to be one, as nothing is truly original, but, as such, I would consider him to be in-between. Again, thank you for the insightful critique.

-Varg

#70 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 04:44 AM

I actually didn't make that pony it was just a pic I found and sort of adopted :P

#71 castle13oblivion

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 04:57 AM

thanks for the advice, i never even liked the tail in the first place, so thats not a problem for me. i also see where youre coming from for the hooves, it does look a bit off to me.
though i am rather attached to the wings, i do agree on their having no place in canon. but i will keep for fantasy purposes

how about this NIAWOC? (not in any way original character)

Posted Image

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Edited by castle13oblivion, 06 October 2012 - 04:58 AM.


#72 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 05:04 AM

Posted Image


Princess Molestia?

Posted Image

#73 Luna Tic

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 05:17 AM

Posted Image
based of me, blank flank <3

#74 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 05:20 AM

So, here is the final pegasus I'm gonna put up (Well actually two,because I still don't have a clue what I want to do for the mane)

Posted Image

Posted Image

Edited by stardragon, 06 October 2012 - 05:21 AM.


#75 BeTa77

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 05:50 AM

Sure, why not?
Spoiler

Edited by BeTa77, 06 October 2012 - 05:51 AM.


#76 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 06:04 AM

Posted Image
based of me, blank flank <3


I had finished my critique, but my laptop decided it wanted to shut down before I could post it, so I apologise if this seems rushed.

Anyway, if it's based off you. it is technically a ponysona, but some people used ponysonas as OCs anyway, so I'm going to critique this OC-style.

This wouldn't fit in FiM. The feeler-ish things on the head are strange. The eyes appear to be heterochromatic, The coat fits okay, the mane too, but the strange gradient colouring in the mane does not. All in all, I give it a needs a lot of improvement /10

Posted Image

Posted Image


OC 1- I don't even know where to start with you. The mane and tail are exactly the same as Vinyl Scratch's. The OC is coloured very similarly to Spitfire, and as it is a Pegasus, I could almost mistake it for Spitfire with a new manecut. I'm not certain, but I think that may also be Spitfire's cutie mark

I give it a this is spitfire with a haircut /10

OC 2- Again, this looks a lot like Spitfire. The fact that you didn't use Vinyl Scratch's mane is a plus though. The mane and tail do not match up very well. Also, something I noticed with both of your OCs, it is oddly tall. I prefer this over the Scratch-looking one because Vinyl hair is so dang overused.

I give it a better than the other one /10

Spoiler


This is a solid-looking OC, and the fact that you used short hair on a Pegasus is a good thing. The colours complement each other well, maybe switch the eye out for another colour. All in all, I give it a suits the show /10.

#77 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 06:19 AM

There is some truth in that

I think I'll stick with the first pegasus I posted here

You've been a great help, thanks!

#78 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 06:29 AM

There is some truth in that

I think I'll stick with the first pegasus I posted here

You've been a great help, thanks!


Heh, no problemo. I hope I wasn't too harsh.

#79 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 06:34 AM

Heh, no problemo. I hope I wasn't too harsh.

Not at all! Peer revision is a good way to improve
WARNING slightly off topic
Spoiler


#80 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 06:40 AM

It's better to come up with one yourself, because any name someone else gives you won't feel right. I got my old one from a generator, and heck, that was a terrible OC.

#81 castle13oblivion

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 05:01 PM

heres a remake of mine: canon version
Posted Image
Wonderbolt version
Posted Image

code:342L085010FCEC9DFFC49D0070000CEBDUN1I34504000001D1C65600963D020T117F3FCC004CB2
(if anyone wants to use this as a base)

Edited by castle13oblivion, 06 October 2012 - 05:02 PM.


#82 Eighth Note

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 07:15 PM

Posted Image

Name's Eighth Note. Thoughts?

#83 Lucariolugia

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 07:44 PM

Could ya crit Luca please? xD
I updated her design, and wondered whether it looked okay or not.
Spoiler


(OH GOD. The image url is HM0H2. HM02 is the HM Fly. x3 The ironic thing is that she can't fly~)

#84 Arthur

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 11:35 PM

Can I have TwitterSwift critiqued
http://imgur.com/a/n8MAc

#85 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 01:53 AM

Posted Image

Posted Image



This is a solid-looking OC, and I can't really find much fault in it. The colours complement well, the mane and tail match near perfectly.

Even though in my opinion an OC has always got room for improvement in some way, I think the visual aspect of this one is excellent.

Posted Image


Firstly, those hooves do not fit a pegasus. Those hooves are the kind that a hardworking earth pony colt has, like Big Macintosh. Your OC's body type doesn't fit the hooves either. Also, for the hair, mane and eyes, Pastelspastelspastelspastelspastels. The eye, mane and tail are all too dark.

So overall, just get rid of those hooves or change the body time, and switch those colours out for some Pastels.

Posted Image


To start off with, maybe try changing either her mane or eyes to something other than red, because (in my opinion at least) red eyes are overdone.
There isn't much else to say really, the coat is fine and I'm intrigued by the Cutie Mark.

Can I have TwitterSwift critiqued


Alright, to start off with, your mane and coat colours clash terribly, if you want your OC to be an athletic pegasus you need to get rid of the glasses, and the eye colour does not fit with the rest of the pony.

Edited by Jasplosion, 07 October 2012 - 01:53 AM.


#86 castle13oblivion

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 05:48 PM

any suggestions on a name? i would like to base it off me, but all i do is karate and play video games

#87 Golfmann

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 06:27 PM

This is starting to get really nit-picky in here...

#88 EPArcher

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 08:51 PM

i have a few OCs but this is my most recent please tell me what you think

Name: Emerald Archer

Posted Image

#89 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 09:32 PM

any suggestions on a name? i would like to base it off me, but all i do is karate and play video games


A name given by someone else will always feel strange, just wait for a name to come to you.

This is starting to get really nit-picky in here...


Well, that's just, like, your opinion, man.

i have a few OCs but this is my most recent please tell me what you think

Name: Emerald Archer

Posted Image


I'll just be right to the point on this one because I'm using my phone and I have to have multiple tabs open and blah.

If the jacket is part of the OC, try usin another colour than totally black, like a pastel grey, because it shows the detail of the jacket more clearly.

You used pastels on the mane, which is good because any darker and the mane and coat would clash. I don't mind the glasses seeing as it's a unicorn and won't be flying upside down or whatever.

Edited by Jasplosion, 07 October 2012 - 09:33 PM.


#90 EPArcher

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Posted 07 October 2012 - 10:21 PM

Ok made some changes, tell me what you think.

Spoiler


#91 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 08 October 2012 - 03:36 PM

Ok made some changes, tell me what you think.

Spoiler


Better, but try using a more pastel brown (e.g. Lighter)

#92 Rhythmition

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 03:31 AM

what do you think of my other oc?
Spoiler


#93 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 01:48 PM

what do you think of my other oc?

Spoiler


I already critiqued this a few pages back.

Moon Mist: This OC would look great if it had a light blue coat. Also, the tail doesn't match up well to the hair, so I suggest fixing that



#94 Rhythmition

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 01:49 PM

sorry didn't see it.

#95 Snowkitty24

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 07:13 PM

Posted Image

Critique this please?
Cutie mark is a painting pallet.

#96 GoldenLynx54

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 07:46 PM

DANGIT. I want a critique, but I don't have a picture...Hum. I'll find the code on GenralZoi's and post it later.



And person who posted earlier, all I have to say is.... LIGHTER BODY. people say use pastel colors in MLP, and that is true. Just a tad lighter, and none should have a black mane.

Edited by GoldenLynx54, 10 October 2012 - 07:48 PM.


#97 Snowkitty24

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 08:02 PM

Posted Image

Better? Btw, this is an "alternate" version of my original oc.

#98 GoldenLynx54

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 08:08 PM

That is beautiful.

#99 Snowkitty24

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Posted 11 October 2012 - 12:15 AM

That is beautiful.


Yay! Thanks!

#100 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 11 October 2012 - 05:53 AM

Golden, I didn't make this thread for people to critique for me.

Edited by Jasplosion, 11 October 2012 - 05:56 AM.



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