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#201 Idze

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Posted 10 January 2013 - 11:01 PM

well ther is a reason for the blue and publel in the mane short one it ar portal colers



#202 Cyv001

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Posted 11 January 2013 - 01:32 AM

Bluh I wish I could critique, but it is jas's thread after all!

Edited by Cyv001, 11 January 2013 - 01:38 AM.


#203 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 11 January 2013 - 03:03 AM

Bluh I wish I could critique, but it is jas's thread after all!

 

...

Just this once.



#204 Cyv001

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Posted 11 January 2013 - 03:17 AM

...

Just this once.

Woo! Ok so I have two things to say, but i'll just say the suggestion that's less detailed. It's for Idze's OC. I don't think she should remove her OC's color strands, but rather link them together in a similar fashion to that of Twilight Sparkle's hair. the two compliment each other well, and if slightly off put to the side, like Twilight's, it could look good! I mean, wouldn't Twi's hair look a bit odd too if her streaks were widely separated? That's all!


Edited by Cyv001, 11 January 2013 - 03:17 AM.


#205 EquestrianAlchemist

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Posted 11 January 2013 - 05:00 AM

I guess someone else's opinion isn't so bad, thought I would throw mine up.
BLARGH!!!
 

Spoiler

This one would work as a Ponysona as well but normally when I RP'd I used myself as a template as I think most people should to be relatable.
That's just me though.
Too explain my CM, I like research not just any kind but historical. When I get into something I check up its history, literally hours of just reading stuff like
"The Exodus of Cybertron" XD I have always loved history in any form.

So feedback? take your time, I'm in no hurry.
Thank you~



#206 Cyv001

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Posted 12 January 2013 - 12:18 AM

I can't help but notice that our OCs are basically using the same base, EquestrianAlchemist.



#207 EquestrianAlchemist

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Posted 12 January 2013 - 12:33 AM

I can't help but notice that our OCs are basically using the same base, EquestrianAlchemist.

Oh? 



#208 Cyv001

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Posted 12 January 2013 - 12:54 AM


Oh?


Flip back a page. Same body type, mane, etc

#209 EquestrianAlchemist

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Posted 12 January 2013 - 12:57 AM

Flip back a page. Same body type, mane, etc

Ah, I can see that. I made mine in FBponymaker though
Here is the original Image of that

Spoiler

Still, I can see how they are similar.



#210 ǝzɐןb ʍoquıɐɹ

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Posted 12 January 2013 - 01:09 AM

qYMey.png

Unicorn, Male

Lives in Canterlot. Has a wife. His wife is named Rolling Hills,

4uSFe.png

And they are expecting a colt soon. Good OC Family? Give me the details of what I should improve on.



#211 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 14 January 2013 - 09:19 AM

I've had this tab open for about 3 days, probably time to use it.

 

undeadvendetta_by_sakurabomb-d5p6i8x.png
 

 

 

I think usually black doesn't work well as a colour on OCs, but it's done well here and looks nice. I also don't think clothes usually work but for some reason you pulled it off pretty well. The only thing I can think of for you to consider changing is the cutie mark since your OC shares it with Doctor Whooves and Colgate/minuette.

 

 

qYMey.png

 

4uSFe.png

 

I think you should tone down the hair on the first one, it's a bit too neon IMO, but that's the only problem I can find in either of them.  


Edited by Jasplosion, 14 January 2013 - 09:19 AM.


#212 Hieros Godhead

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Posted 14 January 2013 - 10:45 AM

Just stopping by to say awesome work you're doing here jas. taking the time out of your life just to help others is never too easy, I know from experience, and these OC's are all looking better through you're critiques.

 

I'm not letting you near Cider, I already know your standing on R and B OCs, and I don't really want a drastic change to him.

 

I'd be happy to give you a hand when need be though, if you need proof of my experience in critiquing there are examples on this forum and on my devART page. Not telling, just a mild suggestion in case you get swamped.



#213 EquestrianAlchemist

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Posted 14 January 2013 - 07:48 PM

I think usually black doesn't work well as a colour on OCs, but it's done well here and looks nice. I also don't think clothes usually work but for some reason you pulled it off pretty well. The only thing I can think of for you to consider changing is the cutie mark since your OC shares it with Doctor Whooves and Colgate/minuette.

 

Yes that cutie mark is a filler, I couldn't find one on the PonyMaker I liked or represented what I wanted better then the hourglass.
I still need a name and a better fitting cutiemark.
Thank you~



#214 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 16 January 2013 - 02:01 AM

Just stopping by to say awesome work you're doing here jas. taking the time out of your life just to help others is never too easy, I know from experience, and these OC's are all looking better through you're critiques.

 

I'm not letting you near Cider, I already know your standing on R and B OCs, and I don't really want a drastic change to him.

 

I'd be happy to give you a hand when need be though, if you need proof of my experience in critiquing there are examples on this forum and on my devART page. Not telling, just a mild suggestion in case you get swamped.

 

 

Really appreciate it, man. And if I ever get swamped, you'll be the first person I go to.

 

Yes that cutie mark is a filler, I couldn't find one on the PonyMaker I liked or represented what I wanted better then the hourglass.
I still need a name and a better fitting cutiemark.
Thank you~

 

No problem :)



#215 ConFused

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Posted 19 January 2013 - 12:34 PM

How is mine?

Spoiler



#216 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 19 January 2013 - 01:35 PM

How is mine?

Spoiler

 

The first time I saw your OC I thought it was just yet another boring RD recolour, but after taking a longer look I can see you actually used a different mane and tail style, one of which (the mane) I have never seen before, so kudos for using a mane  I haven't seen yet. I think the coat and mane complement each other really well. I don't think you could change anything to make it better, really. 



#217 Arthur

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Posted 25 January 2013 - 11:11 PM

Might as well drop this in

Spoiler



#218 Cosmo Gaze

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Posted 26 January 2013 - 01:59 AM

welp lets just put this here

photo-17973.png?_r=1358741632post-10433-0-09342900-1358911051_thumb.ppost-11094-0-30149900-1359149194.png


Edited by boboy76, 26 January 2013 - 02:00 AM.


#219 Snopes13

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Posted 26 January 2013 - 10:01 AM

Here is mine:

 

Melody_zpsc406dfda.png



#220 Guardian Selene

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Posted 29 January 2013 - 08:12 PM

Well before I change my OCs to their new looks, I'm curious to see what you have to say about the old looks.

 

Northern Crescent

Spoiler

 

Starlight

Spoiler



#221 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 29 January 2013 - 08:16 PM

Why does everyone make their OC a Pegasus again?

#222 Guardian Selene

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Posted 29 January 2013 - 08:42 PM

I don't know, thou I only had a few OCs when I 1st came to brohoof which were two Pegasus and the non-pegasi were either too OP or not much work was put in on them at the time. 



#223 EquestrianAlchemist

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Posted 30 January 2013 - 01:50 AM

Why does everyone make their OC a Pegasus again?

 Not everyone does, you have just been noticing more Pegasi.
A reason for that is someone likes a certain character so they find them relatable and in the end make them selves relatable in a way for creating Ponysonas or OC.
 



#224 Cosmo Gaze

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Posted 30 January 2013 - 01:58 AM

Why does everyone make their OC a Pegasus again?

'cuz a lot of people would love to be able to fly and manipulate weather



#225 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 31 January 2013 - 11:34 AM

9rvPzXB.png

 

 

S/He's nice, (I never know which gender some of them are because some people use female noses for male OCs) I think the cutie mark doesn't work well with his/her coat though. Everything else is fine.

 

photo-17973.png?_r=1358741632post-10433-0-09342900-1358911051_thumb.p

 

 

First off, change that mane. Rainbow Dash manes are possibly the most unoriginal manes you can choose. Secondly, swap out that black for another colour (something pastel being the best choice). Lastly, and this is only dependant on if your OC is athletic or not, if your OC is athletic I suggest removing the glasses, because if you're flying at high speeds they're bound to come off. This is only if your OC is a speedy flier though, if not then ignore this.

 

Melody_zpsc406dfda.png

 

 

I can't think of anything you should change, the pastels and brown work together well. Nope, nothing I can think of.

 

 northern_crescent_by_god_zoidberg-d4s1b5  

 

 starlight_by_god_zoidberg-d4to68s.jpg

 

1: I think you should have used a different colour other than the green in her mane, other than that nothing to say other than the fact that she's a bit overly tall for a pegasus.

 

2: She's okay, I think you should have gone for a slightly different red in the mane because at the moment you're using a LOT of warm colours. Maybe change up the mane. Other than that, she's fine other than what I said before about being tall for a pegasus.

 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Alright, had the tab open for a couple of hours but I'm done. Open for more OCs again now.


Edited by Jasplosion, 31 January 2013 - 11:36 AM.


#226 Cosmo Gaze

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Posted 01 February 2013 - 07:10 AM

ok.. i have another OC

sorry, idk why image is so small.

2nuud09.jpg


Edited by boboy76, 01 February 2013 - 07:20 AM.


#227 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 01 February 2013 - 07:11 AM

gsm_zpscd4fc4ff.png

Working on a new OC, wanted to see what you thought.



#228 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 01 February 2013 - 07:18 AM

ok.. i have another OC

et9nqh.jpgsorry, idk why image is so small.

 

He's alright, I think  you should put a bit more variation in the mane other than just straight white. It's a little plain. I do like that blue though.

 

 

 

gsm_zpscd4fc4ff.png

Working on a new OC, wanted to see what you thought.

 

I think there isn't really anything you can improve on. I like the contrast of the brown and cream. But remember, in case your OC is steampunk-themed, don't:

 



#229 Arthur

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 09:15 PM

How about my new OC I'm working on?

Spoiler



#230 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 09:32 PM

'cuz a lot of people would love to be able to fly and manipulate weather

But unicorns can do both those things of they're good enough at magic.

#231 Rori

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 10:07 PM

my OC, Electron

YCpTT.jpg

cm:

FunUjT2.jpg

she's 13 so yeah.... half filly size, half adult size.


Edited by DJ D3RPY <3, 03 February 2013 - 10:10 PM.


#232 dazhito23

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 10:08 PM

But unicorns can do both those things of they're good enough at magic.

 

Wouldn't this be considered OP, though?



#233 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 10:25 PM

Wouldn't this be considered OP, though?

unicorns on a whole are OP, but a unicorn that can do that is gonna be a bookworm that will be a weakling (like twilight)

#234 Golfmann

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 10:48 PM

unicorns on a whole are OP, but a unicorn that can do that is gonna be a bookworm that will be a weakling (like twilight)

 

Actually no unicorn is OP except for twilight. Most unicorns only know how to levitate at the least but twi is the one of the few with a plethora of spells.

 

While i'm here.

 

lPsbMfD.png

 

 

There ya go jas :3


Edited by Golfmann14, 03 February 2013 - 10:49 PM.


#235 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 10:55 PM

I think many unicorns can use much magic. It's based on there cutie mark. Twilight gets a magic cutie mark so it's more coveniant for the creators.

#236 Guardian Selene

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 11:00 PM

Most unicorns know how to levitate and at least have 1 to 3 other magic spells to do unless trained for years to do more magic.  Thou they can only learn spells that are similar to what they know if they train for years. 

 

Twilight is a freak of natural, her type of magic ability is to wide to be a normal unicorn.  She has alicorn blood in her veins



#237 Blazuhira Miller

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Posted 03 February 2013 - 11:05 PM

No, she's just a valid deus ex machina for most situations because she has an unexplained, op cutie mark. You give a unicorn a spider cutie mark and they may as well know web magic.

#238 Cosmo Gaze

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Posted 04 February 2013 - 09:31 PM

Wouldn't this be considered OP, though?

 

 

unicorns on a whole are OP, but a unicorn that can do that is gonna be a bookworm that will be a weakling (like twilight)

 

 

I think many unicorns can use much magic. It's based on there cutie mark. Twilight gets a magic cutie mark so it's more coveniant for the creators.

 

 

Most unicorns know how to levitate and at least have 1 to 3 other magic spells to do unless trained for years to do more magic.  Thou they can only learn spells that are similar to what they know if they train for years. 

 

Twilight is a freak of natural, her type of magic ability is to wide to be a normal unicorn.  She has alicorn blood in her veins

 

 

No, she's just a valid deus ex machina for most situations because she has an unexplained, op cutie mark. You give a unicorn a spider cutie mark and they may as well know web magic.

Ok guys, lets keep this on topic.



#239 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 February 2013 - 05:59 AM

Ok guys, lets keep this on topic.

 

I don't actually mind debate in this thread. I'm all for talking about OCs and how they can be OP.

 

 

YCpTT.jpg

Spoiler

 

 

I think the coat colour is a bit too dark, and the glasses are a bit tacky. If you swapped that body out for a lighter blue she'd look better. Also the pointy horn (as in it's a spike) should be reserved for Alicorns, most regular ponies aren't seen with horns that sharp.

 

lPsbMfD.png

 

I already did this one didn't I?

 

edit: found it

 

 

I think the horn looks a little out of place, the tail could match up to the mane a little better, something, just something, is making the OC look a little weird to me. It might be that I haven't see that many colts that are that buff without the neck thing that Big Mac has, I can't find a picture of it but I think you know what I mean. I dunno. Something just feels off.

 

Then you posted that version and I responded with 

 

 

He looks a lot better here, it may have been the eyes that had put me off a little on the first one, and he looks a bit less overly buff.


Edited by Jasplosion, 05 February 2013 - 06:02 AM.


#240 High Orbit

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Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:09 AM

Whelp. I've been here before, and I'll do it again this time. 

Can any of you tell me what would be a good symbol representing Solace(Emotion) that's vague enough not to recognize at first glance, and would fit Orbit's dark-brown well?

 

((Before you start flaming me, yes, it's a pegasus, because I've always wanted to be free from the world's suffering, yes, it has multi-coloured wings because Orbit's unique in the sense that he's not supposed to have wings like these, but ended up with them anyways, and yes, he has hooves because he would look funny without them, and that he was supposed to be an earth pony (He was, in the first draft.) but ended up a pegasus due to a genetic defect. (His mother is a unicorn, father pegasus. Therefore by default he should be an earth pony) And yes, his coat's a tad too dark for your liking, because if I lighten it even by 0.5 on the colour chart it throws his entire palette off sync.))

 

If you have a better palette for Orbit, voice it now or forever hold your peace.


Edited by High Orbit, 05 February 2013 - 06:10 AM.


#241 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:41 AM

Whelp. I've been here before, and I'll do it again this time. 

Can any of you tell me what would be a good symbol representing Solace(Emotion) that's vague enough not to recognize at first glance, and would fit Orbit's dark-brown well?

 

((Before you start flaming me, yes, it's a pegasus, because I've always wanted to be free from the world's suffering, yes, it has multi-coloured wings because Orbit's unique in the sense that he's not supposed to have wings like these, but ended up with them anyways, and yes, he has hooves because he would look funny without them, and that he was supposed to be an earth pony (He was, in the first draft.) but ended up a pegasus due to a genetic defect. (His mother is a unicorn, father pegasus. Therefore by default he should be an earth pony) And yes, his coat's a tad too dark for your liking, because if I lighten it even by 0.5 on the colour chart it throws his entire palette off sync.))

 

If you have a better palette for Orbit, voice it now or forever hold your peace.

 

007-Quantum-of-Solace-1-icon.png

 

just kidding

 

I honestly have no idea what a solace cutie mark would look like.



#242 High Orbit

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Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:45 AM

007-Quantum-of-Solace-1-icon.png

 

I knew this was coming...

 

Looks like Orbit's going to be stuck a blank flank for a tad longer. Not that it affects anything, seeing Orbit's entire backstory is hinged on the fact that he's unsure what his talent is, even after getting his mark.



#243 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 05 February 2013 - 06:51 AM

Your OC's backstory is so complicated compared to my OCs... they seem almost too simple.

 

But I guess I am working on a new OC, so I'd love ideas for a backstory.

 

Okay, to be relevant to this thread, I have a poni.

shade_zps3b67cf3d.png



#244 High Orbit

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Posted 05 February 2013 - 07:15 AM

The trick is not to make a backstory for an OC, it's to make an OC for a backstory.

 

Orbit has been under my development for 6 months, ever since I've joined the fandom. He started out as a bad OC, in fact, a grey alicorn with sliver hair, eyes, and blue tipped wings. His cutie mark back then was the earth, and I called him Solace. Which was fine, as I used that skin primarily for ruling over my server.

 

  Then, I met Brohoof, and it's high OC standards. During that six months between my first and second builder tests, I did a complete overhaul of Orbit, basing his new name off his old cutie mark. I shredded the color scheme, and pretty much threw everything out the window except his wings and spirit. 

 

  Now, I faced a problem. I had a new OC, but he had no mark. For weeks I tried finding ways around it without changing his appearance, but to no avail. Solace, my OC's old name, I integrated into his story, giving him his golden quill pen, and later what would be his talent. Now I had another problem, that is to find a way to get around his looks, as his wings and hooves would never fit in a canon storyline. The solution? More backstory. It was around this time I implemented his yearning to find out who he was, as well as his parents stories. (His father is Altitude, while Orbit has no mother, a silent respect for my best friend who is the same.) 

 

  Then, I began refining the crude backstory, canonizing it. I separated his curiosity, and replaced it with uncertainty. This curiosity I shaped into the one called Muffins, or 'Fins, in Uni Days. He is usually portrayed as a parasprite or computer program, unless the RP forbids it, which then I return to using Solace, Orbit's childhood gift from his mother. 

 

  There are many, many ways to create a character with depth. In Orbit's case, I used the simplest: Feedback. With every RP Orbit is in, he gains more and more traits, 'growing' as I call it, in depth and personality. 

 

  In conclusion, the more 'flawed' an OC is in the start, the better it will be in the future, if you choose to never give up despite the criticism that you might get.

 

Re-railing the thread, I really need to get Orbit's palette a few notches up :/ All I can see are his gold eyes on my phone screen.


Edited by High Orbit, 05 February 2013 - 07:18 AM.


#245 midnight228

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Posted 05 February 2013 - 11:33 PM

Wow

#246 tudexd

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Posted 05 February 2013 - 11:57 PM

Can you critic my amazing OC?

 

Spoiler


#247 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 06 February 2013 - 12:51 PM

Can you critic my amazing OC?

Spoiler


needs more plums

#248 High Orbit

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Posted 06 February 2013 - 01:50 PM

And pears, more pears. I like that HD face O.o



#249 Gwendolynn

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Posted 06 February 2013 - 11:30 PM

Here's an an OC of mine, Purplethought.

http://fc01.devianta...on3-d5tnll3.png

Yes, I know the name is not very original...but I wasn't coming up with anything. XD

#250 RunningWolf251

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Posted 06 February 2013 - 11:40 PM

Whelp. I've been here before, and I'll do it again this time. 

Can any of you tell me what would be a good symbol representing Solace(Emotion) that's vague enough not to recognize at first glance, and would fit Orbit's dark-brown well?

 

((Before you start flaming me, yes, it's a pegasus, because I've always wanted to be free from the world's suffering, yes, it has multi-coloured wings because Orbit's unique in the sense that he's not supposed to have wings like these, but ended up with them anyways, and yes, he has hooves because he would look funny without them, and that he was supposed to be an earth pony (He was, in the first draft.) but ended up a pegasus due to a genetic defect. (His mother is a unicorn, father pegasus. Therefore by default he should be an earth pony) And yes, his coat's a tad too dark for your liking, because if I lighten it even by 0.5 on the colour chart it throws his entire palette off sync.))

 

If you have a better palette for Orbit, voice it now or forever hold your peace.

 

When you think of comfort (solace, seeking solace in something), what do you think of? When you were a kid, what would have been something you could seek solace in? A sort of 'security blanket'? I believe that a teddy bear or stuffed animal constitutes a source of solace and comfort, and when you see one, wouldn't you think of childhood memories and how happy and carefree you were as a child? So then, would a teddy bear be good for you? Perhaps one with a slightly lighter shade of brown would be visible against his coat color?

 

Perhaps not this one, but as a suggestion for one?

 

how-to-draw-a-teddy-bear.gif

 

Also, the color scheme is fine to me.



#251 Golfmann

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Posted 06 February 2013 - 11:50 PM

I don't actually mind debate in this thread. I'm all for talking about OCs and how they can be OP.

 

 

 

 

I think the coat colour is a bit too dark, and the glasses are a bit tacky. If you swapped that body out for a lighter blue she'd look better. Also the pointy horn (as in it's a spike) should be reserved for Alicorns, most regular ponies aren't seen with horns that sharp.

 

 

I already did this one didn't I?

 

edit: found it

 

 

 

Then you posted that version and I responded with 

 

Just figured I post it while i was here just in case i didn't before ^^



#252 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 07 February 2013 - 01:34 PM

Here's an an OC of mine, Purplethought.

http://fc01.devianta...on3-d5tnll3.png

Yes, I know the name is not very original...but I wasn't coming up with anything. XD

 

I actually like the name purplethought :P . I don't think you can change anything with her to make her better, you've used similar colours but they differentiate enough to not make the OC look dull. 



#253 High Orbit

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Posted 07 February 2013 - 01:56 PM

When you think of comfort (solace, seeking solace in something), what do you think of? When you were a kid, what would have been something you could seek solace in? A sort of 'security blanket'? I believe that a teddy bear or stuffed animal constitutes a source of solace and comfort, and when you see one, wouldn't you think of childhood memories and how happy and carefree you were as a child? So then, would a teddy bear be good for you? Perhaps one with a slightly lighter shade of brown would be visible against his coat color?

 

Perhaps not this one, but as a suggestion for one?

 

how-to-draw-a-teddy-bear.gif

 

Also, the color scheme is fine to me.

 

That made me think of a certain brown bear with a rapist face...

 

I had very few childhood toys, and most of my time was spent on books. My short-sightness is well over 1000 in both eyes now, and I have been wearing glasses since I was 5.

 

Anyhow, Orbit is unique, as 'Solace' in his case, is comfort in times of need, of which he will understand when he finally trusts someone enough to tell them about his true self behind the mask, as I am attempting in Uni Days, as a development RP of sorts. But his mark must be obscured enough not to be recognizable as solace, yet unique enough in the fact that it sticks out, like his wings. Also, Orbit, in his current dev state, is typical of somepony who has been given so much when he never asked for it, and now has no idea where to begin. In his case, wings, and an innate ability to write, read, program, sing, do poetry, draw, whistle, fly, dive and play the recorder well, but only to a certain limit.

 

Effectively, Orbit has NO single talent, and his true talent itself is what I, and Orbit, are trying to find out. Which raises yet ANOTHER problem, because you can't have a young adult running around blank-flanked, so he has to have gotten a mark, which leads up to me saying that he doesn't know what exactly is it supposed to mean. This is the first of Orbit's three major plot arcs, the other two introducing his wings and background respectively, which we will not touch as it is irrelevant. 

 

So yeah, it's back to the drawing board for this. The worst thing is, a large chunk of the story hinges on the fact that he is lost, unsure of himself in a world where your talents are laid out before you, and if his mark is too obvious, it kills the rest of his backstory. But if it is too complex on the other hand, like Turret's OC, it kills off the canon. It's a delicate balance.


Edited by High Orbit, 07 February 2013 - 01:57 PM.


#254 Npaws

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Posted 09 February 2013 - 07:26 AM

Critique my OC Lightning Flicker?

 

Spoiler

 

Cutie mark:

Spoiler

 

Anything different I should do with his colors?



#255 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 09 February 2013 - 07:37 AM

Critique my OC Lightning Flicker?

 

rNZGSlh.png

 

nS7Mkgn.jpg

 

All I have to say about his colours is that you shouldn't use dark blue in both the mane and the coat. Switch it out for a different colour.

 

I'm going to do something a little different, I'm going to critique his cutie mark and name. 

 

Why does he have a sword for a cutie mark? You'd think with a name like Lightning flicker he would be involved with electricity or something, and his cutie mark would reflect that. Just try and come up with a name that matches the cutie mark, because otherwise he's pretty nonsensical.

Remember, with an OC the backstory is as important as their appearance.



#256 RunningWolf251

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Posted 09 February 2013 - 07:41 AM

That made me think of a certain brown bear with a rapist face...

 

I had very few childhood toys, and most of my time was spent on books. My short-sightness is well over 1000 in both eyes now, and I have been wearing glasses since I was 5.

 

Anyhow, Orbit is unique, as 'Solace' in his case, is comfort in times of need, of which he will understand when he finally trusts someone enough to tell them about his true self behind the mask, as I am attempting in Uni Days, as a development RP of sorts. But his mark must be obscured enough not to be recognizable as solace, yet unique enough in the fact that it sticks out, like his wings. Also, Orbit, in his current dev state, is typical of somepony who has been given so much when he never asked for it, and now has no idea where to begin. In his case, wings, and an innate ability to write, read, program, sing, do poetry, draw, whistle, fly, dive and play the recorder well, but only to a certain limit.

 

Effectively, Orbit has NO single talent, and his true talent itself is what I, and Orbit, are trying to find out. Which raises yet ANOTHER problem, because you can't have a young adult running around blank-flanked, so he has to have gotten a mark, which leads up to me saying that he doesn't know what exactly is it supposed to mean. This is the first of Orbit's three major plot arcs, the other two introducing his wings and background respectively, which we will not touch as it is irrelevant. 

 

So yeah, it's back to the drawing board for this. The worst thing is, a large chunk of the story hinges on the fact that he is lost, unsure of himself in a world where your talents are laid out before you, and if his mark is too obvious, it kills the rest of his backstory. But if it is too complex on the other hand, like Turret's OC, it kills off the canon. It's a delicate balance.

 

To be perfectly honest, you really, really need to sit down and think about your oc. If you make it (your backstory) so that it's impossible for you to find something about your character, don't you think that a character that exists solely because of your thought and whim is meaningless without your direction? I mean, if you try too hard to make it too hard, it will become too frustrating. I understand that you want to have a complex character, but it's really confusing as an outsider to see that and think of a cohesiveness.

 

I don't think you will be able to find a talent or cutie mark if you don't make it available to yourself. This is a critical piece of information that is just missing from your otherwise extensive story that you've spent a seemingly large amount of time on.

 

You're making too many problems for yourself that have no solution until you whittle away the problems. Sometimes it's best just to start with a question and answer it. What is his top priority, what is his talent, and what can he do that benefits both himself and others? Model your CM after that, then making a story becomes a whole lot easier. You've dug a hole in making a story and then trying to fit a CM to it when it has so many facets that there is no one CM to fit it.

 

Of course, this is just my perspective on it.



#257 Npaws

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Posted 09 February 2013 - 07:44 AM

Spoiler

 

I made his color a lighter blue and am working on the cutie mark.  What you think?


Edited by Npawesome, 09 February 2013 - 07:45 AM.


#258 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 09 February 2013 - 07:48 AM

I just realised I forgot yours, stardragon. Sorry ^^;

 

shade_zps3b67cf3d.png

 

I think the coat doesn't work well at all, definitely try to avoid really dark coats. Maybe a light grey will do better. 

 

By the way, your drawing style has REALLY improved since this picture. I'm impressed.

 

uELg2fZ.png

 

Much better.



#259 High Orbit

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Posted 09 February 2013 - 08:53 AM

To be perfectly honest, you really, really need to sit down and think about your oc. If you make it (your backstory) so that it's impossible for you to find something about your character, don't you think that a character that exists solely because of your thought and whim is meaningless without your direction? I mean, if you try too hard to make it too hard, it will become too frustrating. I understand that you want to have a complex character, but it's really confusing as an outsider to see that and think of a cohesiveness.

 

I don't think you will be able to find a talent or cutie mark if you don't make it available to yourself. This is a critical piece of information that is just missing from your otherwise extensive story that you've spent a seemingly large amount of time on.

 

You're making too many problems for yourself that have no solution until you whittle away the problems. Sometimes it's best just to start with a question and answer it. What is his top priority, what is his talent, and what can he do that benefits both himself and others? Model your CM after that, then making a story becomes a whole lot easier. You've dug a hole in making a story and then trying to fit a CM to it when it has so many facets that there is no one CM to fit it.

 

Of course, this is just my perspective on it.

 

Ah, but Orbit IS me, or at least how I see myself. Lost. I can do pretty much anything, to a limit, but nothing ever feels right. So I make it hard, yes,but the frustration I feel is pretty much already the frustration I have towards myself. I can't give him a talent, because I have no idea what mine is, either.

 

Plus, most of Orbit's deeper storylines are usually not brought out during RP's, solely because the RP is just not focused on the emotional side of OC's, but rather the actions. So for now, yes, Orbit is stable without a CM. 

 

In short, Orbit literally represents my drive to seek my place in the real world, and thus I want to see him finally succeed in fitting in the false world.

 

Now,looking back at my earlier posts,I shouldn't have been asking ya'll to find a suitable CM in the first place. After all, one can never force a talent upon someone else. We shall just wait and see. After all, Orbit is a dynamic OC, meaning he learns and grows. Eventually, he will find out his talent, and that I am sure of.


Edited by High Orbit, 09 February 2013 - 09:04 AM.


#260 iluvponies35

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Posted 09 February 2013 - 06:31 PM

Blaze 2.0:

 

hBAnWvm.png?1

 

And I don't know bout you but I feel like I wanna keep the glasses. I can also change the hooves if they still seem weird.



#261 Haxorizer145

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Posted 10 February 2013 - 03:12 PM

Would you crtique Windy Bubbles? http://postimage.org/image/8rfhb7dhl/ her cutie mark is a bubble blower



#262 Arthur

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Posted 14 February 2013 - 09:38 PM

What do you think?

0_Artic.png



#263 Rori

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Posted 15 February 2013 - 01:39 AM

I think the coat colour is a bit too dark, and the glasses are a bit tacky. If you swapped that body out for a lighter blue she'd look better. Also the pointy horn (as in it's a spike) should be reserved for Alicorns, most regular ponies aren't seen with horns that sharp.

oh, it's just how i had made her back then.

it's actualy a bit more curved.



#264 Great And Powerful Derpy

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Posted 15 February 2013 - 02:16 AM

pXM37U4 This is Note Pen she is a dork.Of course no one knows.She was going to keep her hair back and show her freckles and say hi but then she saw a boy with glasses and a hat get bullied.she was to afraid to show her true self and acted like a cute boy but she stood up to the bullies.



#265 RedHolm

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Posted 16 February 2013 - 09:46 PM

first_attempt_att_oc_by_redholm-d5tdyg1.

Might as well =) Any critics on my OC?



#266 CraftyAllie

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Posted 19 February 2013 - 07:31 AM

Forgive me if I already posted her in this thread, but I honestly cannot remember if I did or not.

Have some Tumble Wonder!

Spoiler

 

I am always looking for ways to improve her a bit.

I also really need to draw her a new picture, lol. 


Edited by CraftyAllie, 19 February 2013 - 07:31 AM.


#267 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 24 February 2013 - 10:23 PM

Don't worry guys, I haven't died/forgotten about this thread. I've been busy with a lot lately, so I'll try and get these requests done sometime this week.



#268 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 18 March 2013 - 05:46 AM

Sorry for the long wait, guys! I've been really really busy with schoolwork (and I'm still not finished) and just haven't had enough time to do stuff like this lately.

 

Would you crtique Windy Bubbles? http://postimage.org/image/8rfhb7dhl/ her cutie mark is a bubble blower

 

 

The mane and tail styles don't work that well together, to be honest. The tail looks too messy compared to the mane. Try switching out the tail for a different style, and it'll probably look a lot better.

 

What do you think?

0_Artic.png

 

 

Nice. The multi-tone mane works really well with that coat colour, as well as the eye. I think you've got a perfect OC, here.

 

pXM37U4 This is Note Pen she is a dork.Of course no one knows.She was going to keep her hair back and show her freckles and say hi but then she saw a boy with glasses and a hat get bullied.she was to afraid to show her true self and acted like a cute boy but she stood up to the bullies.

 

 

Broken image, sorry. 

 

first_attempt_att_oc_by_redholm-d5tdyg1.

 

 

Try and use regular wings, I'm pretty sure that style of wing is only used on alicorns (cadence, twilight). The hooves look a little weird and game controller cutie marks are a bit cliche.

 

Forgive me if I already posted her in this thread, but I honestly cannot remember if I did or not.

Have some Tumble Wonder!

Spoiler

 

I am always looking for ways to improve her a bit.

I also really need to draw her a new picture, lol. 

 

I love everything, okay? The colours are beautiful and that drawing style, oh god it's brilliant.

 

 

 


 

 

hBAnWvm.png?1

 

 

 

Pretty good, though the hooves don't really fit that well with the rest of the body. And it's a bit bright.

 

Now accepting more requests, and I'll make sure to get them done sooner so they don't pile up like last time! >_<


Edited by Jasplosion, 18 March 2013 - 05:51 AM.


#269 RedHolm

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Posted 18 March 2013 - 09:28 PM

Problem i had whit the pony generator at that time is that it won't properly show the cutie mark if i had the normal wings. So the generator wings are the alicorn wings. And normal pictures are normal wings=)

The hoofs are beyond changing now tho. And i'm a hardcore gamer, so anything not gaming related would be strange=)

 

Altho ty for the critic.



#270 catopia26

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Posted 18 March 2013 - 09:38 PM

Do you think I can get your opinion on this?

 

FacYDuU.png



#271 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 24 March 2013 - 02:18 AM

Do you think I can get your opinion on this?

FacYDuU.png


Broken

#272 catopia26

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Posted 24 March 2013 - 07:06 PM

Here, I posted to imgur. http://imgur.com/fyYIia0



#273 Night_Breeze

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Posted 24 March 2013 - 07:12 PM

My 2 OC's

 

Spoiler



#274 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 25 March 2013 - 10:37 AM

Here, I posted to imgur. http://imgur.com/fyYIia0

 

Pretty nice. I think there isn't much more you can do with this one, besides maybe getting rid of that muzzle gradient because it looks like he's been into the cocaine sugar stash.

 

 

 

My 2 OC's

 

Spoiler

 

I'm pretty sure I already critiqued the second one, but I'll give it another shot. 

-Dark grey and red

-Rainbow Dash Mane

+Nice coloured mane

+/-Bacon hair depending if you like bacon or not

 

The first one is pretty much perfect, not much to say about that one besides the fact that the eyes are pretty boring, you should put some colour in them.



#275 Night_Breeze

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Posted 25 March 2013 - 11:45 PM

ya, I just change the tail style on the second one (used be RD tail too)

 

The first one I mad quickly withe the Pony Avatar Creator



#276 Ice Strike

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Posted 26 March 2013 - 06:20 PM

pony50250.png

 

I didn't have a drawing software to make my own when i made this btw.


Edited by Ice Strike, 26 March 2013 - 06:20 PM.


#277 Haxorizer145

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Posted 27 March 2013 - 11:19 PM

The hooves and ear aren't staying, I still don't have a revised version. http://postimage.org/image/fyyb2rp7b/

#278 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 28 March 2013 - 12:35 AM

pony50250.png

 

I didn't have a drawing software to make my own when i made this btw.

 

 

To be honest, it's pretty boring. The hair is all one colour, also MLP ponies aren't bright neon colours, so tone that down a bit and it would look better. 

But yeah, that hair is really dull. Your whole character consists of blue and grey.

 

The hooves and ear aren't staying, I still don't have a revised version. http://postimage.org/image/fyyb2rp7b/

 

I actually really like it, though I think it would be better if it was an earth pony, just because they have a better connection with growing things and that connects to coffee grains and stuff like that. The hooves and ear aren't that great, no, so good call on taking them out. So yeah, I think it would be perfect if you changed it to an earth pony but that's your decision really.



#279 Quoth the Raven

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Posted 28 March 2013 - 03:24 AM

Well now that the posting isn't going nuts, could you try critiquing Nightingale again?

Shadowsong_zps7b3d3d39.png

no_zpse7c16dd7.png



#280 Idze

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Posted 29 March 2013 - 01:20 PM

made a Stalion a will back and not good wit words

oc_by_idze-d5znrli.png



#281 Sky Jazz

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Posted 29 March 2013 - 02:36 PM

nTwgaWW.png

What do ya think?

Pic made by DefectiveTurret btw :D

(Still love that pic xD)



#282 Rarara

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Posted 29 March 2013 - 04:28 PM

Not a drawing because I suck at drawing ponies, and no cutie mark because I can't think of one

K87q7Mx.png



#283 Haxorizer145

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Posted 29 March 2013 - 11:28 PM

http://postimg.org/image/ihc3gwhq5/ his name is Helter, I just made him for a pic Faffle made me, so I guess he is a uh.. Gangster?

#284 Rarara

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Posted 30 March 2013 - 12:01 AM

http://postimg.org/image/ihc3gwhq5/ his name is Helter, I just made him for a pic Faffle made me, so I guess he is a uh.. Gangster?

if he is a stallion why dies he have mare facial style? see below:

sysiIgi.png


Edited by Pumpkin pie-13, 30 March 2013 - 12:07 AM.


#285 Haxorizer145

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Posted 30 March 2013 - 12:04 AM

I rushed it. And didn't notice.

#286 crowvon

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Posted 05 April 2013 - 06:25 PM

could you please critique my pony coldbody?

ignore his bad cutie mark, whoops

(very sorry for my scratchy art style! i have shaky hands, haha)

 

tumblr_mksnv4xgND1rd4i38o1_1280.png


Edited by crowvon, 06 April 2013 - 12:04 AM.


#287 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 08 April 2013 - 03:37 AM

Well now that the posting isn't going nuts, could you try critiquing Nightingale again?

Shadowsong_zps7b3d3d39.png

no_zpse7c16dd7.png

 

You've pretty much perfected Nightingale, and managed to make dark colours on an OC work. I don't think you could add or remove anything to make it better.

 

 

 

made a Stalion a will back and not good wit words

oc_by_idze-d5znrli.png

 

Nice, but 

a) Why is he wearing an aperture science lab coat?

b What does the candle have to do with aperture science?

 

 

nTwgaWW.png

What do ya think?

Pic made by DefectiveTurret btw  :D

(Still love that pic xD)

 

 

Pretty much perfect, not much I can say about this one.

 

 

 

Helter.png

his name is Helter, I just made him for a pic Faffle made me, so I guess he is a uh.. Gangster?

 

I think it's a bit bland, black and grey makes a very dull OC. Try for more vibrant/interesting colours.

 

 

K87q7Mx.png

 

Decent, change up the eye colour though. It's a bit plain right now.

 

 

 

could you please critique my pony coldbody?

ignore his bad cutie mark, whoops

(very sorry for my scratchy art style! i have shaky hands, haha)

 

tumblr_mksnv4xgND1rd4i38o1_1280.png

 

 

  • Shoes
  • What the hell is up with the orange ears

That's all I can say about this one



#288 castle13oblivion

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Posted 08 April 2013 - 06:49 AM

i havent had a name, or a skill, or a cutie mark.

 

his name is streak for now

streakn.png



#289 Fohlen Ein Formschön

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Posted 11 April 2013 - 05:47 PM

Well, might as well get my OC critiqued~
 

Spoiler


Edited by Luna Catante, 11 April 2013 - 07:58 PM.


#290 Living Ordyin

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Posted 11 April 2013 - 06:39 PM

living_improved_by_a_living_pony-d618w8aHis name's Living (No surname as of yet, perhaps thing, I'm a Living Thing.)


Edited by Living, 11 April 2013 - 06:40 PM.


#291 catopia26

catopia26

    Pleasure to make your acquaintance!

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Posted 11 April 2013 - 07:29 PM

Um, pardon me if it isn't any of my buisness, but seeing as how the cutie mark is a record, what about Living Record?



#292 Ice Strike

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    I like my coat.

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Posted 12 April 2013 - 12:33 PM

pony53176.pngWiptide, my 2nd OC, hopefully this will get a better saying than my last post



#293 Night_Breeze

Night_Breeze

    I can explain...

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Posted 13 April 2013 - 12:10 AM

^Pony Avatar Creator Demo; Lyra's mane, Twistbolt's tail



#294 Turbo Maximus

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Posted 13 April 2013 - 01:03 AM

How bout mine? It's my profile picture...the cutie mark is a paint brush in flames that generally matches the color scheme

 

(note: I am colorblind so go easy)

 

(note:note: he NEVER takes the headphones off)



#295 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 13 April 2013 - 04:01 AM

i havent had a name, or a skill, or a cutie mark.

 

his name is streak for now

streakn.png

 

 

The hair doesn't look too good, swap that out for a lighter colour. Oh and try not to use the tail styles of the main 6 ponies. Other than that, he's fine.

 

Well, might as well get my OC critiqued~
 

Spoiler

 

 

She turned out pretty nice for an inverted version of your pink OC :P 

 

I don't think you need to change anything, she's fine as she is right now.

 

living_improved_by_a_living_pony-d618w8aHis name's Living (No surname as of yet, perhaps thing, I'm a Living Thing.)

 

 

I'm going to be brutally honest here. I apologise if any of the following offends you.

 

This OC, is to be frank, an eyesore, and one of the most overused kinds of OCs I've seen. Making a colour-swap of vinyl scratch is extremely popular for some reason. Here are some tips to getting your OC to not be kind of awful

1. Change the mane and tail to something that isn't a direct colour swap of vinyl scratch's 

2. Change the body colour to something that doesn't stand out so much and not black

3. Use more than 2 colours in your OC's design, here you've used nothing but black and purple

4. Try to come up with an idea for an OC that isn't yet another DJ, there's already approximately 1432135 of them in the community.

 

Again, sorry if I've been harsh, but you have a ways to go before your OC is acceptable.

 

pony53176.pngWiptide, my 2nd OC, hopefully this will get a better saying than my last post

 

 

My tip is to not use the pony creator you use, you get severely limited to the mane and tail styles you can use and even thought pony creator is used a lot, it's a lot better than the one you use.

 

As for the OC, the mane is a bit too dark when combined with the already dark coat, try to use some lighter colours and pastels.

 

How bout mine? It's my profile picture...the cutie mark is a paint brush in flames that generally matches the color scheme

 

(note: I am colorblind so go easy)

 

(note:note: he NEVER takes the headphones off)

 

Profile pictures are difficult to critique from but I'll try.

 

At the moment your OC's coat colour is very close to a skin colour, which looks pretty weird on ponies and the like, Try switching that out for a darker or different shade of red. Also having accessories that constantly stay on your OC is rather gimmicky and DJ OCs are the most overused ones around.



#296 Fohlen Ein Formschön

Fohlen Ein Formschön

    Creator of Pokémon ...

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Posted 13 April 2013 - 04:11 AM

She turned out pretty nice for an inverted version of your pink OC :P

 

I don't think you need to change anything, she's fine as she is right now.

Not even close to being like my old one~ But thanks ^_^ Your comment actually made my day ^_^ I was having a downer day and seeing that helped me smile a bit~



#297 Turbo Maximus

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Posted 13 April 2013 - 04:12 AM

Profile pictures are difficult to critique from but I'll try.

 

At the moment your OC's coat colour is very close to a skin colour, which looks pretty weird on ponies and the like, Try switching that out for a darker or different shade of red. Also having accessories that constantly stay on your OC is rather gimmicky and DJ OCs are the most overused ones a

 

 

Thank you for the critique...I'm going to change the headphones into earbuds and my coat to a darker shade...thanks ^-^

 

ALL FIXED :D


Edited by Turbo Maximus, 13 April 2013 - 08:02 PM.


#298 Ice Strike

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    I like my coat.

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Posted 13 April 2013 - 08:32 AM

My tip is to not use the pony creator you use, you get severely limited to the mane and tail styles you can use and even thought pony creator is used a lot, it's a lot better than the one you use.

 

As for the OC, the mane is a bit too dark when combined with the already dark coat, try to use some lighter colours and pastels.

 

I find that a useful tip, thank you, I think I'll use the other one with the pony codes.

 

And I guess he is a bit too dark but with the torso, that he was supposed to be a dark color, but I think I'll change the brightness of his mane.


Edited by Ice Strike, 13 April 2013 - 11:56 AM.


#299 deactivated-333333333

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Posted 13 April 2013 - 11:10 AM

Please don't quote the entire post when replying to my critique, guys. Do what Luna Catante did and just post the part where I critiqued yours. This saves a lot of page space.

#300 Ice Strike

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    I like my coat.

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Posted 13 April 2013 - 11:56 AM

woops, fixing that, I forgot your could delete part of it.




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