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Please Critique my Submission


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#1 CDJ445544

CDJ445544

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    CDJ445544

Posted 05 January 2013 - 04:56 AM

Hi guys, could someone give me feedback on my house at plot 71 in the submissions world? I only have 3 days left to be CMC, so preferably could someone help soon? My ingame name is CDJ445544, like my forum Username. Thankyou!

#2 Gortern

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    Kommandant_Erwin

Posted 05 January 2013 - 05:59 AM

Well, lets start with the Pros, shall we?

- Triangle shaped roof

- Dynamic shaped outer walls

- Preferred Material for exterior

and interior Pros

- Preferred Furniture for bottom floor and some for the top.

Now lets go over the Cons, I'm sorry but I found a lot :(

- you have a giant cross shaped window in the front, which doesn't make the house look good. maybe size it down to just a 2x3,3x2 and or a 2x2?

- the bottom and top floors are very empty and with no interior walls, try adding some rooms inside.

- the bathroom upstairs has obsidian around it, which also, doesn't make the interior look good. maybe it will look better if you remove it?

- the upstairs floor is just 2 colored sandstone blocks in lines, try using different wood colors for both the bottom floor and top floor.

- you used a large amount of torches, try using glowstone or redstone lamps

- and the overall house needs more detail, try adding pictures, flower pots, leaves on caldrons and shelves.

I hope you look into these Cons and try to improve your house.

Good luck!

#3 dazhito23

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Posted 05 January 2013 - 06:19 AM

I want to point out that your entire bottom floor is one gigantic room. I suggest that you find a way to divide it into at least two rooms. Also the tables in the house can look a lot better. /warp ikea has good ideas and references for tables and furniture. Speaking of furniture, your kitchen resembles a room you'd expect to find on a survival home, not a Ponyville house. Try building a sink and a refridgerator.

#4 Luna Lens

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    Princess_Luna

Posted 06 January 2013 - 02:31 AM

Exterior

> Roof is good except for the rear. It is very awkward where the taller section meets the shorter.

> smooth sandstone or sand may be more preferable than birch wood.

> although the frame adds detail to the walls, they are flat. Try having outcroppings in some areas. Be careful not to make "tumors".

> lack of vegetation (there's nothing but hedges surrounding the house) subtracts from its overall presentation.

> the windows on the right side have very strange shapes.

 

Interior

> The rafters on the 1st-floor ceiling look good.

> The wall-lighting is a bit strange.

> The entrance area is very plain.

> [SEVERE] I can see redstone torches in the ceiling. Seeing redstone stuff besides what is intended to be seen (dispensers, lamps, etc.) is never a good idea.

> The 1st floor in general is very bare and lacks detail.

> The furniture is very simple. Try /warp ikea for furniture ideas.

> the 2nd floor is more like an attic than actual living space.

> labeling rooms with signs is generally frowned upon both by builders and admins.

> Sandstone and sand aren't advisable for flooring material.

 

Recommendations

> Modify the shape of your house to make it less square.

> Modify the back of your roof so the lower and higher sections are less awkward at the junction.

> redo your interior layout.

 

Verdict

> This house will most likely not pass in its current state. Heavy revision is advised.




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