1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:02,800 RD: Fluttershy, I'm flying sideways! 2 00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:03,900 FS: Oh no! Me too! 3 00:00:03,900 --> 00:00:04,900 RD: Oh no! 4 00:00:04,900 --> 00:00:17,200 RD: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! FS: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! 5 00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:30,900 TS: In today's episode, everyone in Ponyville is lining up so that they can drink cider. That is what is happening. 6 00:00:30,900 --> 00:00:42,010 That is a thing that we're all doing. Someone thought it was a good idea for this episode if everyone just lined up so that we could all drink cider. 7 00:00:42,010 --> 00:00:45,600 S: Oh, it could be worse, at least we're not watching paint dry. 8 00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:49,650 TS: Wow, Spike! I know the writers are stupid but they're not that stupid. 9 00:00:49,650 --> 00:00:52,900 S: I bet you 50 bucks next season we're watching paint dry. 10 00:00:52,900 --> 00:00:53,900 TS: You're on! 11 00:00:53,900 --> 00:00:56,000 S: Why are we lining up for cider anyway? 12 00:00:56,000 --> 00:01:00,080 TS: I don't know, maybe because RAINBOW DASH PEED IN THE WATER SUPPLY! 13 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:01,800 RD: Hey, you can't prove that was me! 14 00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:03,700 TS: You admitted doing it five minutes ago! 15 00:01:03,700 --> 00:01:05,800 RD: Yeah, well maybe I can't prove that was me. 16 00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:08,000 TS: We saw you do it six minutes ago. 17 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,000 RD: Fluttershy told me to do it! 18 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:14,000 FS: Well, that isn't true, but I'm happy to take the blame for my best friend. 19 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:15,670 RD: Shut up, Fluttershy! No one's interested! 20 00:01:15,670 --> 00:01:19,700 AJ: Alright everyone, if you're done being stupid I've got some good news and some bad news. 21 00:01:19,700 --> 00:01:24,450 The bad news is I've had to quadruple the price of the cider. The good news is I'm about to be very rich! 22 00:01:24,450 --> 00:01:26,800 Random Pony: You business practices are reprehensible! 23 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:32,300 One day, we ponies will have had enough of your tyranny and unite against your reviled machinations! 24 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:37,750 AJ: Oh, well, uh, thank you Random Pony that I've never seen before. So who's first up for cider? 25 00:01:37,750 --> 00:01:41,800 PP: Oh! Me me me! Time to make LittleKuriboh proud! Shut up and take my money! 26 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:47,800 (crowd laughing at hilarious original joke) 27 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:52,280 RP: Your low standards of humour are why no one tries to make legitimate comedy anymore! 28 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:56,329 One day, we ponies will rise up in demand of higher quality! 29 00:01:56,329 --> 00:01:59,630 AJ: Sorry everyone, Pinkie Pie bought all the cider. You'll have to come back tomorrow. 30 00:01:59,630 --> 00:02:01,900 Not entirely sure where she got the money for all that. 31 00:02:01,900 --> 00:02:06,500 P: I'm a professional gamer! It is the best career choice and I recommend everyone do it. 32 00:02:06,500 --> 00:02:09,700 RD: It's not fair! How come there isn't enough cider for anyone else? 33 00:02:09,700 --> 00:02:11,310 AJ: Well don't blame me! 34 00:02:11,310 --> 00:02:11,900 RD: Why not? 35 00:02:11,900 --> 00:02:13,500 AJ: I would prefer it if you didn't? 36 00:02:13,500 --> 00:02:15,200 RP: The reasons behind your actions are... 37 00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:19,300 AJ: Would you shut up! Are we just introducing random characters whenever we feel like now? 38 00:02:19,300 --> 00:02:21,800 Flam: Well good morning to you, Ponyville! 39 00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:23,800 Flim: A hallowed hello, hallelujah! 40 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:26,000 AJ: Wow, this must be how Twilight feels all the time. 41 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:30,900 Flam: Citizens of Ponyville, do not be alarmed. I come bringing the word of the lord! 42 00:02:30,900 --> 00:02:37,300 TS: Hmm, someone's trying to bring religion to Ponyville. Watch out, Spike, this may turn violent and/or the apocalypse. 43 00:02:37,300 --> 00:02:42,900 Flam: I have some to teach you of the one true alicorn. He who saved Manehatten from killer robots. 44 00:02:42,900 --> 00:02:45,800 He who first fought and defeated Discord. 45 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:51,000 He who is totally best friends with Celestia and she has a secret crush on him. 46 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:57,200 It is King Lord High Commander Darkflame Steelwings the Magnificant! 47 00:02:57,200 --> 00:03:00,000 He has an extra pair of wings and also created magic. 48 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:01,170 Flim: The original creator! 49 00:03:01,170 --> 00:03:04,100 TS: That's bullcrap! Celestia is the only true alicorn! 50 00:03:04,100 --> 00:03:05,800 S: What about Princess Luna? 51 00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:06,900 TS: Princess who of the what now? 52 00:03:06,900 --> 00:03:13,300 Flam: Citizens of Ponyville, you need to ask yourselves are you sick and tired of the Apple family running out of cider all the time? 53 00:03:13,300 --> 00:03:14,200 Flim: All the time! 54 00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:18,000 Flam: Are you unsatisfied with the unfulfilled promises of this faithless heathen? 55 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:21,520 AJ: Faithless heaten? Screw you, I'll have you know I'm catholic! 56 00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:23,100 TS: Wait a minute, you're catholic? 57 00:03:23,100 --> 00:03:25,200 AJ: Yeah. TS: But you don't believe in God. 58 00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:27,600 AJ: Of course I don't! I'm catholic! 59 00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:32,610 Flam: Mares and stallions, don't you think now is the perfect time for change? 60 00:03:32,610 --> 00:03:37,200 RP: Just because you are well spoken and charismatic doesn't mean we will blindly follow you! 61 00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:41,500 We ponies are better than mindless sheep and will not stand for this subjugation! 62 00:03:42,500 --> 00:03:45,100 Flam: Uhhh... AJ: Oh, just ignore him, he's a douche bag. 63 00:03:45,100 --> 00:03:48,800 RP: You may well try to hurt my spirit, but we ponies will not... 64 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:51,800 AJ: You know, you may think your some sort of champion of the population, 65 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:55,700 but you actually just sound a lot more like an ass who hates anyone who doesn't share your opinions. 66 00:03:55,700 --> 00:03:56,900 PP: Yeah, you sound just like... 67 00:03:58,100 --> 00:04:04,400 Flam: Regardless of all that, if you come to the service of King Lord High Commander Darkflame Steelwings the Magnificant, 68 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:07,200 You will have all the cider you'll ever require. 69 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:10,800 I just remembered he has the power to make cider, he can totally do that. 70 00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:12,580 AJ: You're making this up as you go along! 71 00:04:12,580 --> 00:04:15,000 Flam: That is absolutely not true! 72 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:20,200 King Lord High Commander Darkwing Flamesteel the Magnificant is always correct. 73 00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:21,500 AJ: You got his name wrong that time. 74 00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:28,000 Flam: You may well point out things that are the truth, but that does not mean that my truth is also not equally the truth! 75 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:28,900 AJ: Uh, what now? 76 00:04:28,900 --> 00:04:31,000 Flam: How about we settle this in a competition? 77 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:36,050 Whoever makes the most cider will be the sole cider provider for this town. 78 00:04:36,050 --> 00:04:39,930 AJ: No, that's a stupid idea, and anyone who thinks it's a smart idea is stupid. 79 00:04:39,930 --> 00:04:42,700 We're not doing that, you piss off back to where you came from. 80 00:04:42,700 --> 00:04:44,700 Flam: Very well, peace be with you. 81 00:04:44,700 --> 00:04:46,000 AJ: Peace be with you. 82 00:04:47,500 --> 00:04:49,500 AJ: Oh, thank goodness, they're finally gone. 83 00:04:49,500 --> 00:04:54,200 Wait a minute, the stupid bastards left their sacrificial cider here! Everyone let's get drunk! 84 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:55,699 PP: Yeah! Shut up and take my money! 85 00:04:55,699 --> 00:04:59,900 (crowd laughing at the best joke again) 86 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:17,400 BB: My cider's got pee in it! RD: Sorry! My bad.