1 00:00:03,300 --> 00:00:06,260 Twilight Sparkle: ...So ever since I woke up, I've just had this weird sense of vertigo 2 00:00:06,260 --> 00:00:09,340 and déjà vu. Like something isn't totally right. 3 00:00:09,340 --> 00:00:13,390 Applejack: Well, I dunno what to tell ya, darlin'. I'm not a doctor. In fact, the only 4 00:00:13,390 --> 00:00:17,180 thing I'm an expert in is apples. So unless your problem is related to apple farmin', 5 00:00:17,180 --> 00:00:18,250 I can't really provide much insight. 6 00:00:18,250 --> 00:00:22,279 Twilight Sparkle: I didn't come to you for your expertise. I would go to a book for that. 7 00:00:22,279 --> 00:00:25,989 Actually, I'd go to a book for apple farming while we're at it. I came to you because I 8 00:00:25,989 --> 00:00:29,730 get the feeling that maybe you're the most levelheaded pony I've met around here. And 9 00:00:29,730 --> 00:00:32,870 I figured if anyone could sense a deviation from the norm, it might be you. 10 00:00:32,870 --> 00:00:36,699 Applejack: Now, I'm pretty sure I heard an insult in there. Was any of that supposed 11 00:00:36,699 --> 00:00:39,510 to be a compliment? Because... 'Cause it sounded like maybe... 12 00:00:39,510 --> 00:00:40,170 Twilight Sparkle: There was— 13 00:00:40,170 --> 00:00:41,859 Applejack: ...probably most it was just insults really. 14 00:00:41,859 --> 00:00:46,699 Twilight Sparkle: A little of both, I guess. I mean to say you're boring as hell but reliably 15 00:00:46,699 --> 00:00:47,800 boring, so that's good. 16 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:51,980 Applejack: Oh, well, if it's good, then you're reliably a bitch. Great job. But I haven't 17 00:00:51,980 --> 00:00:54,120 noticed none of the stuff you're tellin' me about, Twilight. Okay? 18 00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:57,660 Twilight Sparkle: I find it funny that the element of honesty gets snippy with me for 19 00:00:57,660 --> 00:00:58,239 being honest. 20 00:00:58,239 --> 00:01:01,449 Applejack: Oh, don't you pull that on me. There is honesty and then there is frankness 21 00:01:01,449 --> 00:01:02,269 to the point of absurdity— 22 00:01:02,269 --> 00:01:05,710 Twilight Sparkle: It doesn't matter! Just look around your farm. Does it seem... I dunno, 23 00:01:05,710 --> 00:01:07,770 I... I dunno how to describe it. 24 00:01:07,770 --> 00:01:09,970 Applejack: Looks the same as it always has to me. 25 00:01:09,970 --> 00:01:13,710 Spike: [belch] Ugh. It's like heartburn every time. Twilight, I've got a letter. 26 00:01:13,710 --> 00:01:19,030 Twilight Sparkle: Here. Give it to me. Okay. Dah-dah-dah-dah-dah... Oh, right. The Gala. 27 00:01:19,030 --> 00:01:25,520 I hate the Gala. And of course tickets. Two of them. Like I've got anybody to invite or 28 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:27,080 something. God, I'm lonely. 29 00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:29,170 Applejack: Wait. The Great Galloping Gala? 30 00:01:29,170 --> 00:01:32,380 Twilight Sparkle: No, it's "Grand Galloping Gala", you backwards mudhorse. 31 00:01:32,380 --> 00:01:35,260 Applejack: It says right there on the ticket "Great". 32 00:01:35,260 --> 00:01:36,920 Twilight Sparkle: Oh. ...Huh. 33 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:38,580 Applejack: See? You bonehead. 34 00:01:38,580 --> 00:01:40,450 Twilight Sparkle: Don't call me a bonehead. 35 00:01:40,450 --> 00:01:44,350 Applejack: Are these fightin' words? Or are they terms of endearment? Choose carefully, 36 00:01:44,350 --> 00:01:47,680 darlin', because one option gets a horseshoe embedded in your teeth. 37 00:01:47,680 --> 00:01:51,730 Twilight Sparkle: I have the magical power to kill you, resurrect your corpse, then kill 38 00:01:51,730 --> 00:01:54,110 you again. Don't threaten me with violence. 39 00:01:54,110 --> 00:01:59,230 Applejack: Okay. Uh, let's back up and try again. I am expressin' displeasure with the 40 00:01:59,230 --> 00:02:00,310 tone of your discourse. 41 00:02:00,310 --> 00:02:03,870 Twilight Sparkle: I am connected like you would not believe, and if you challenge me, 42 00:02:03,870 --> 00:02:05,550 there will cease to be an Applejack! 43 00:02:05,550 --> 00:02:06,810 Applejack: Darlin', seriously? 44 00:02:06,810 --> 00:02:08,060 Twilight Sparkle: Yes! 45 00:02:08,060 --> 00:02:10,679 Applejack: [scoffs] Okay. Fat lot of good it'll do ya. 46 00:02:10,679 --> 00:02:11,019 [beat] 47 00:02:11,019 --> 00:02:14,810 Twilight Sparkle: So... do you want a ticket to the Gala? 48 00:02:14,810 --> 00:02:15,180 [crash] 49 00:02:15,180 --> 00:02:16,680 Rainbow Dash: [pained groans] 50 00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:19,720 Applejack: Good heavens, darlin'! That sounded painful! Y'all alright? 51 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:21,390 Twilight Sparkle: What is wrong with you? 52 00:02:21,390 --> 00:02:26,170 Rainbow Dash: Oh, what went wrong? Uh, well, I was practicing flying and then I got disoriented 53 00:02:26,170 --> 00:02:30,660 and then there was the ground. So what is wrong is I clearly need to practice harder. 54 00:02:30,660 --> 00:02:33,200 Twilight Sparkle: Have you ever thought about getting a non-stupid hobby? 55 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:36,930 Rainbow Dash: I don't have time for hobbies. I gotta train for the Wonderbolts. I keep 56 00:02:36,930 --> 00:02:40,810 applying and they keep rejecting me, but if I keep doing it, sooner or later they're gonna 57 00:02:40,810 --> 00:02:41,310 let me in. 58 00:02:41,310 --> 00:02:43,470 Twilight Sparkle: They require a college degree. 59 00:02:43,470 --> 00:02:48,180 Rainbow Dash: [sharp inhale] Well... that... n-not if you're really good. 60 00:02:48,180 --> 00:02:51,990 Twilight Sparkle: No, Dash, it's a program for military officers, so you... Look, do 61 00:02:51,990 --> 00:02:53,460 you guys want Gala tickets? 62 00:02:53,460 --> 00:02:55,440 Applejack: Wait. You're just givin' them to us? 63 00:02:55,440 --> 00:02:58,440 Twilight Sparkle: I don't need them. I'm the princess's protégé and my brother is the 64 00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:01,230 captain of the royal guard. I may as well be castle staff. 65 00:03:01,230 --> 00:03:05,340 Applejack: Well, I'll be darned, Twilight. That's sweet of y'all. Well, you know, for 66 00:03:05,340 --> 00:03:08,840 practical reasons, I bet I could set up a food stall and make a huge bundle sellin' 67 00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:09,910 some of our apple dishes. 68 00:03:09,910 --> 00:03:14,190 Twilight Sparkle: You're... You're gonna bring a food stall? N-No, look... catering is included 69 00:03:14,190 --> 00:03:15,910 with the ticket. Food is provided. 70 00:03:15,910 --> 00:03:19,860 Applejack: Yeah, well, that may be, but I'll betcha those sheltered high-class ponies ain't 71 00:03:19,860 --> 00:03:22,090 never had any real down-home country cookin'. 72 00:03:22,090 --> 00:03:25,740 Twilight Sparkle: AJ, the catering is rated with three Messara stars. You're planning 73 00:03:25,740 --> 00:03:30,140 to compete with world-class chefs with street vending. I'm feeling sympathetically embarrassed 74 00:03:30,140 --> 00:03:31,680 just imagining it. Don't. 75 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:35,390 Applejack: Twi, nobody gets ahead by not takin' any risks. You gotta put yourself out there. 76 00:03:35,390 --> 00:03:37,840 Twilight Sparkle: There is a limit to that kind of conventional wisdom. 77 00:03:37,840 --> 00:03:39,620 Rainbow Dash: I don't think I really want a ticket. 78 00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:41,870 Twilight Sparkle: Why? Dash, you're just being arbitrary. 79 00:03:41,870 --> 00:03:44,340 Rainbow Dash: It sounds all boring and posh. 80 00:03:44,340 --> 00:03:49,099 Twilight Sparkle: I just said the food is rated with three Messara stars. You will never 81 00:03:49,099 --> 00:03:53,620 get a chance to eat food like that again in your life. You will not be able to afford 82 00:03:53,620 --> 00:03:53,780 it. 83 00:03:53,780 --> 00:03:57,069 Rainbow Dash: But you're just giving both tickets away. If it's so great, how come you're 84 00:03:57,069 --> 00:03:57,770 giving away both tickets? 85 00:03:57,770 --> 00:04:01,000 Twilight Sparkle: Do you want me to give it to Rarity? She... She probably knows what 86 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:01,660 they're for. 87 00:04:01,660 --> 00:04:04,430 Rainbow Dash: No-no-no! No-no. I-If Rarity wants them, I want them too. 88 00:04:04,430 --> 00:04:07,200 Twilight Sparkle: [sigh] Y-You're just gonna set them on your desk and forget you have 89 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:10,110 them, aren't you? The Wonderbolts are gonna be there. You know that, right? 90 00:04:10,110 --> 00:04:12,420 Rainbow Dash: Oh, no way! Oh, you should've said! 91 00:04:12,420 --> 00:04:16,430 Twilight Sparkle: They're the cream of the Cloudsdale military. Formerly anyway. Look, 92 00:04:16,430 --> 00:04:19,809 I've had too much stupid for one day. Are you guys happy? You're not gonna throw those 93 00:04:19,809 --> 00:04:22,270 away or use them for drink coasters, are you? 94 00:04:22,270 --> 00:04:26,919 Applejack: No, no. I mean... it's a ways out and I gotta check my schedule. You know how 95 00:04:26,919 --> 00:04:29,300 it is. It's like opportunity costs and what-have-ya. 96 00:04:29,300 --> 00:04:33,090 Rainbow Dash: Are you sure the Wonderbolts are gonna be there? How come you just give 97 00:04:33,090 --> 00:04:34,520 away tickets to the Wonderbolts? 98 00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:38,960 Twilight Sparkle: Those tickets are worth thousands of bits. Both you guys, it's a royal 99 00:04:38,960 --> 00:04:43,430 event. Look it up. And don't forget – you need to dress nice. Really nice. Not business 100 00:04:43,430 --> 00:04:46,439 casual. I mean you guys should pretend to be filthy rich. 101 00:04:46,439 --> 00:04:50,860 Applejack: Oh. Well, that's gonna be a problem on account of I ain't filthy rich. 102 00:04:50,860 --> 00:04:54,969 Rainbow Dash: I don't really own a dress. I don't even know what size I wear. Hey, what 103 00:04:54,969 --> 00:04:58,559 if we sell the tickets 'cause they're worth thousands of bits and then use the money to 104 00:04:58,559 --> 00:04:59,650 buy a really nice dress? 105 00:04:59,650 --> 00:05:03,870 Twilight Sparkle: Because that's stupid and circular and, on top of everything else, scalping 106 00:05:03,870 --> 00:05:08,520 those tickets is a felony. Don't lose them. Just... I dunno, rent something. And if you 107 00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:11,729 change your minds, for God's sake, tell me. Don't throw the tickets away. 108 00:05:11,729 --> 00:05:15,490 Applejack: Alright. Have it your way. I'll think about it and I'll let you know. See 109 00:05:15,490 --> 00:05:16,319 ya later, darlin'. 110 00:05:16,319 --> 00:05:23,319 Rainbow Dash: This is very suspicious.