Is there really a reason
Is there really someone watching
Am I pretending the patterns
Are just that instead of whatever else
Randomness scares me because
Well
The uncertainty scares me.
I feel like I know everything and nothing
About us
Who do I want?
I knew what I want back when I left him
I wanted to leave him.
I still do
But
I wonder if he'd approve
Maybe not
Maybe not
Maybe
There's a thousand and one things I'd ask god
And they're all the exact same
Can I be with her?
Can I be with her?
Can I be with her?
Is it worth it to keep doing this to myself
To go back home to where my home isn't
Home's where my heart is
And I left that a hundred miles away
Now I just feel empty
Please let me return to my heart