>You are Anon, self proclaimed Hortator of Equestria.
>You have just returned to your house with Twilight Sparkle.
>She waits in the living room while you head upstairs to grab a new shirt. She shouts as you leave the room.
>"I still don't see how it's possible, Anon!"
>You pause and shout to Twilight before entering your room.
"True, the Warp in the West was one of more paradoxical legends. Speaking of paradoxes, wait until you hear about the Gray Fox. A man everyone knew, but none could remember."
>You chuckle as you remove the charred remains of your once favorite shirt.
>You look it over, nostalgia setting in.
>This was the shirt you wore when you came to Equestria.
>A soft smile crawls across your face.
>Its logo was the design p0nies had come to associate you with, Rarity most of all had taken an interest in it. Simple yet elegant, it had become synonymous with you.
>A simple circle with perpendicular lines crossing slightly off center...
>Ironic that something you had identified yourself with before is now so closely identified with you.
>...
>This was also the shirt you wore when SHE began trying to guess your fetish.
>You frown as the fabric tears in your hands.
>Needed a new rag anyway. You toss the shirt across the room and pick out a new one from the closet.
>"101" was displayed on the back.
"Tastes. My tastes never change, do they?"
>You laugh to yourself as you put the shirt on.
>Twilight call from the living room.
>"Anon? What's taking so long? Hurry up!"
*Thump-thump*
"Yeah, I'm coming."
>You quickly walk through the door and enter the living room.
>A faint scent hits you upon reuniting with Twilight.
>Smells like... paper?
>Weird.
>As the two of you head to the hospital, you regale Twilight with the legend of the Gray Fox.
>The purple bookworm takes the story in and you can practically hear the gears turning in her head as she processes the information.
>When you finish, you gasp for air. Talking for such a long time is an arduous task, and you never seem to get enough oxygen when speaking more than four sentences in quick succession.
>...
>That paper smell is back.
>You inhale again to be sure.
>Yup, just like opening a new book. What could it be? It wasn't a bad smell. If anything, you actually enjoyed it.
>"Anon? You OK?"
>Twilight's voice pulls you back to reality.
"Hmm?"
>Twilight nods to the side and you notice you've reached the hospital.
"Oh, heh, just thinking I guess."
>She looks you over again, her worry palpable.
>You chuckle to alleviate her fears.
"I'm OK…"
>You bang your fist on your chest as a display of power and cry out like the Black Knight of old.
"I'm invincible!"
>She lets out a giggle of relief and smiles as the two of you enter the hospital.
 
*Tick**Tick**Tick**Tick*
>That clock…
*Tick**Tick**Tick**Tick*
>Is driving…
*Tick**Tick**Tick**Tick*
>You…
*Tick**Tick**Tick**Tick*
>c…
*Tick*
>r…
*Tick*
>a…
*Tick*
>z…
*Tick*
"WHY!"
>Your sudden outburst startles Twilight who had been doing some nervous reading in the corner.
>After being led to this examination room, you were told to wait for a bit until somep0ny was able to see you.
>The uncomfortable hospital bed you sat on wasn't making time move any faster though.
*Tick**Tick**Tick**Tick*
>God, you hate hospitals.
>It's not that you dislike doctors, or needles, or any of that stuff.
*Tick**Tick**Tick**Tick*
*Sigh*
>You just hate the boredom.
>A sudden tapping at the window breaks the excruciating dreariness of the room.
>You turn and see Rainbow Dash flying just outside the window.
>The blue pegasus flies in as you open the window.
"What are you doing here Rainbow?"
>"I was sent to get you. Aren't you supposed to be helping Applejack today?"
>You swear under your breath as you remember your original schedule for today.
>Applejack needed some help around the orchard and you had volunteered.
>OK, not really volunteered, she was paying you. The work was nice and the bits were good, so you agreed to show up and help out for a few days (or however long they needed you).
"Fu…"
>You catch yourself.
"Yeah. Can you go tell her I'll be there as soon as we're done here?"
>Rainbow grins as she turns to leave.
>"Sure thing!"
>As Rainbow passes Twilight, she stops and looks at the purple unicorn.
>"Why are you both here exactly?" *Gasp* "Twilight, are you pregnant?!"
>She snaps her head to you.
>"And Anon's the father?!"
>Both your's and Twilight's faces flush as you both try to speak.
"Wh-what are you-"
>"I- I-"
"Th-that's-"
>"Ridiculous!"
"Yeah! R-ridiculous!"
>Rainbow tears up as she laughs.
>"You two! You two are just too easy! Ha ha!"
>She approaches the window and prepares to take off.
>"This has been way too fun!"
>Twilight and you sit in silence as she flies away.
*Tick*
>You tear the clock off the wall and run to the window. You can see Rainbow Dash flying lazily away.
"You know what they say."
>You twist your arm and cradle the clock like a Frisbee.
"Time flies when you're having fun!"
>With that, you fling the clock in Rainbow direction.
>It makes it half way across the street before promptly angling down and striking the ground.
>Twilight snickers behind you, trying her best to not laugh noticeably.
> You suck at Frisbee.
>…
>But at least that damn ticking has stopped.
>The door opens and a medical p0ny finally makes an appearance. It was Nurse Redheart.
>She smiles when she sees you.
>"What seems to be the problem, Mr. Anonymous?"
>You sit on the bed again as she looks over your charts.
>Twilight shifts nervously in the corner. Best to not say everything that had happened.
"I had a little mishap this morning. Just wanted to make sure nothing's broken."
>Redheart looks at you, then back to the chart.
>"Your stats all seem good, no high blood pressure, heart and lungs sound normal… All we need now is some R&M."
"R&M?"
>"Routine and Microscopy"
>…
"Uh?"
>She opens a cabinet and takes out a clear cup."
>You hear Twillight whisper, "Oh my…"
>Nurse Redheart places the cup on the counter and you just stare at it.
"Is this really necessary?"
>"If you want to make sure everything is working, yes."
>This is awkward.
>Twilight bushes a little as she speaks.
>"I'll be out in the waiting area, Anon. I'll meet you there when you're done."
>You hear the door close as Twilight exits, leaving just you and Redheart in the room.
>A sudden pang in your chest causes you to rub the brand through your shirt.
>Not only that, but you could no longer smell the delightful scent of books anymore.
>In its place was the fragrance of something akin to… baby powder maybe?
>Makes sense, being in a hospital.
>Odd that you didn't notice it before though.
>You continue to stare silently at the cup for a few moments, then decide to try your luck again.
"Is this REALLY nec-"
>"Just fill the cup Anon, then we can get you the results."
*Thump-thump*
>You stand and begin to unbutton your pants. You grab the cup and position it and yourself to fill it.
>Nurse Redheart was caught off guard by your vigor.
>"M- Mr. Anonymous, you don't have to do that in front of me!"
>You stare at her staring at you… or rather, staring at -you-.
>It's amazing you didn't have and aneurism with the amount of blood in your head at that point.
"Heh, heh. Sorry"
>You walk behind a curtain and fill the cup. As you give the container to Nurse Redheart, you catch her staring at your crotch, something flashing in her eyes.
"Nurse Redheart?"
>You snap a few times in front of her face to get her attention.
>"Wha-? Oh…" *Cough* "Thank you, Mr. Anonymous."
"… No problem. I guess I'll be going now…  I'll be back later for my results…"
>You head to the door, but are stopped before you leave.
>"Oh, Anon."
"Yes?"
>"I'm surprised you're still in town, are you going to be here all week?"
"… Yes? Why? Is something going on today?"
>A grin flashes across the white mare's face before disappearing behind her regained composure.
>"Never mind, it's nothing."
"Ok then."
>As you leave, you hear her mutter,
>"See you soon."
>Then you hear the sound of plastic being peeled off a container with a *pop* followed by the a deep inhalation sound.
>The door closes all the way and you shudder.
>God, you hate hospitals.
 
>You meet Twilight in the waiting room and the two of you head out.
>Another pang hits you and again you massage the brand.
>The book smell is back… Great?
>You look at your phone.
>11:24 AM
>"You want to get lunch, Anon? I'm craving pizza."
>You look at Twilight and grimace slightly.
"No thanks, I've had enough Italian- uh- Istalion today. Besides, I need to get to go help Applejack, remember?"
>"Right…"
>She hangs her head a little.
>You scratch behind her ear gently, eliciting a glance up at you.
"How 'bout dinner?"
>The look on her face was precious.
>Twilight hops around you chanting,
>"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!"
>She stops after a few seconds and smiles awkwardly at you.
>You return the smile as you part ways and head to Sweet Apple Acres.