"Fuck off Fluttershy." you grumble, staring at the selection of milk cartons available from Applejack's stall.
>"But Anon, m-my milk is made with love, I promise." Fluttershy weakly pleads.
>Fluttershy has been hounding you all around the market today, pestering you with poorly formulated attempts to win your affection.
>So really, just like any other day.
>Today though, you had things to do. Things that you weren't going to let a pony ruin.
>Tomorrow was Cereal Day, the best day of the month, and by no means was anything getting between you and a big bowl of your favori-
>"Hey! An just what are ya implyin about mah milk Ms. Luvbug? That I ain't carin about my cows?" Applejack's sharp retort snaps you out of your reverie.
>With a muffled "eep!" Fluttershy quickly hides behind your legs, a redness creeping across the top of her muzzle.
>Sighing, then shaking your legs free of their yellow entanglement, you finally decide on your milk.
>With a smile, you hand over a few more bits than it's worth to the orange shopkeeper.
>Applejack stops glaring at Fluttershy long enough to notice the transaction is considerably in her favor.
>"Shucks, c'mon now Ahnon, ya know ya can't keep doin that."
"That's for when you fixed my fence last week AJ, besides, what are friends for?"
>You let out a sardonic chuckle at that last line. The purple horse was always onto you about that friendship horseshit.
>"Oh ah think yew already paid me back -plenty- for tha fence sugarcube." Applejack's bashful visage shifts into a seedy leer, her eyes trained directly onto yours.
>Applejack's comment hangs heavy in the air and you feel a second set of eyes boring into the back of your head.
"Y-yeah, m-must have forgot haha thanksgottago" you stutter out, quickly grabbing your carton and putting it next to your spaghetti.
>You dread what might happen if Fluttershy were to find out about you giving other ponies belly rubs.
>"See ya around then hoss." Applejack winks as you scramble to leave.
>You offer a flustered farewell and begin making your way back to your house, your shopping for the day finished.
>Fluttershy, ever your shadow, trails close behind and speaks up as soon as you've left earshot of Applejack's stall.
>"Anon.. what was she talking about? You're n-not.." her quiet voice trembles as you tread the familiar marketplace cobbles.
"I, uh, already paid for the fence Fluttershy. We're friends."
>"Anon, are w-we friends?"
"You kind of just follow me everyw-AACK"
>Your admission is cut short by a bolt of cerulean slamming into your lower back, knocking you to the ground.
"AAH FUc- WHAT THE SHIT DASH" you spin around to face the perpetrator.
>Rainbow Dash hovers proudly in the air, hooves crossed and a giant smirk on her face.
>"Gotcha Anon! That wasn't even my top speed, I can go triple that easy." Rainbow Dash boasts as you attempt to regain your footing.
>"Y-you could have really hurt him.."
>Fluttershy has taken advantage of this opportunity to check your body for damage, namely using her snout and hooves.
>"B-be careful with him.. p-please." Fluttershy murmurs towards your assailant.
"Fluttershy I'm fine, get off." you push her muzzle off your crotch.
>Turning your attention back to the haughty blue pegasus, you fix her with a malicious stare.
"What the fuck was that for dude? You know tackling people from behind isn't a prank, right?"
>Rainbow Dash deflates a little under your glare and admonishing before speaking up.
>"Y-yeah I knew that. Just testing your, uh, reflexes."
>She pauses, regaining her posture and smirk.
>"So where are you guys going? I bet you I know somewhere way cooler we could check out Anon, it's r-"
>Standing back up and dusting yourself off, you interrupt her ramblings.
"I," you aim a frown down at Fluttershy, "am going home. By myself. I have a big day tomorrow that I'm trying to get ready for."
>Fluttershy's eyes widen nervously, "Y-you aren't g-going on a date... are you?"
>Rainbow Dash laughs a little louder than normal, "No way, he'd never date uncool ponies. It's gotta be like a party or something. Right Anon?"
>After giving both ponies an exhausted stare, you wordlessly turn around and head off towards your house.
>It's always fucking something with these ponies. Cripes.
>"Hey Anon, it's a party right? You're just getting ready for a party tomorrow that isn't cool enough for me to know about right? You aren't going on a date right?" Rainbow Dash's inquisitions come faster as both ponies follow hurriedly behind you.
>You can practically hear Fluttershy's eyes well up with tears as she anxiously trots alongside you.
>"A-annon.. p-pplease..."
>You decide not to grace the ponies with a response, prompting further pleads and questions while you silently plod to your house.

>Arriving at your front porch, neither pony has ceased talking since your initial statement.
"ALRIGHT ALRIGHT!" you exclaim loud enough to freeze both ponies.
"Tomorrow is Cereal Day. I eat cereal in my house by myself. Okay? That's all it is. No dates, no parties."
>Both ponies' expressions of shock fade into relief.
>Rainbow Dash is the first to speak up, "H-haha wow that uh. That's kinda cool I guess. Cooler than a party."
>Fluttershy blinks a few tears free from her eyes, "C-can I come A-anon? I like c-cereal.."
>"Sorry Fluttershy, it sounds like only cool people are allowed to go, so it'll just be me and Anon. Hey Anon, need any help getting ready?" Rainbow Dash answers Fluttershy before you can get a word in, all the while casually walking up to your door.
>You sigh, then reach down and pick up Rainbow Dash by the midsection.
>She gives a slight spasm as your hands make contact with her flank and she snaps her head around to lock her widening eyes with yours.
>"wha-?"
>Leaning back, you wind up and then hurl her as far from your house as you can manage.
"NO PONIES ALLOWED ON CEREAL DAY." you shout towards the quickly fading blue speck.
>You turn your attention to the sniveling yellow pony squatting pitifully in front of your porch.
"And that means you too. Now scram."
>Walking back into your house, you shut the door with a slam.
>Not even a minute passes before you hear a familiar feeble knock at the door.
>Opening the door confirms your suspicions that Fluttershy never left.
"Didn't I tell you to get fucking LOST?"
>"C-can you t-throw me too?"