>Rolling over, you haven’t slept much since you got back last night.
>Your thoughts keep going back to the previous days.
>The movie you watched with your friends was great, though you cut yourself earlier that day…
>As for the museum, it started nice...Then you had a small breakdown…
>But shopping was fun, you even bought a new book, then again, you had cut twice earlier…
>Then there was yesterday, seeing Connie being so happy to show the hall was great.
>Visiting the statue however, not so much…
>Only good thing that came out of that was seeing Connie scare that stallion.
>Still curious as to what she said.
>Rest’s snoring breaks your thoughts.
>It’s kinda funny to be honest.
>As you stare at the ceiling, you close your eyes and try to sleep.
>’Seems kinda fruitless at this point.’
>Not again…
>’Gonna bite yourself if you hear the truth again?’
>I just need to sleep.
>’So you’re going to lay in bed like you usually do? Good, about time you accept that things don’t change.’
>I already changed from everything I did on this trip.
>’It’s not just a habit you break, it’s who YOU are. That is something that doesn’t change in a week.’
>I’m making the effort to fix that.
>’Each day you’ve been here, you’ve fallen apart at one point or another.’
>I…
>’See? Even though you pushed on, you fell each time. Your ‘friends’ might’ve been there, but that didn’t stop it from happening.’
>You...You’re…
>’Still going on with that? I’m a thought in your head, one of many in fact.’
>Yeah…
>Reopening your eyes, you realize this is futile.
>Looking over, you see Rest let out another snore.
“Least she isn’t that loud.”
>You open up your suitcase and pull out your personal book.
>Haven’t written anything since you got here.
“Might as well.”
>Getting up, you head out into the living room.
>As you settle into the couch, you start to write.

>Strange how creativity can come and go like this.
>You keep writing and erasing, not quite satisfied with your work.
>Setting down the pencil, you reread it again.
“This isn’t right, it should be more personal. Maybe something on what happened to me?”
>Of course, that’s the only way you can write.
>Such an obvious answer too, though you try to avoid doing that.
>You’d rather write poetry about anything else other than yourself.
>Shaking your head, you pick up your pencil and start writing again.
>>”You’re up early.”
>Pausing, you look up and see Connie trotting out.
“Couldn’t sleep.”
>She nods, heading over to the fridge to pull out stuff for breakfast.
>As she is prepping to cook, you figure you could ask her the question on your mind.
“What did you say to that stallion yesterday?”
>She stops for a moment before continuing.
>>”Well...I just made him reconsider his actions.”
>Yeah not likely.
“Really?”
>She shakes her head and stops cooking to come over to you.
>Connie stops in front of you and her face loses some of its happiness.
>>”You really want to know? Okay, I said I wasn’t afraid to tear his balls off in front of all those ponies if he didn’t fuck off.”
>You let out a little laugh, but feel some shock hearing her swear.
>She smiles and heads back to cooking.
>>”If he had accepted your apology, I would’ve let it go, but he didn’t. No pony, and I mean NO pony, messes with my friends.”
>Her words warm your heart.
>Of course she cares, she has done so much for you and Rest this trip.
>Going back to your writing, you try to focus.
>You rewrite it again and again though, still not satisfied.
>Setting down your pencil again, you smell Connie’s cooking.
>Your stomach answers you, just the first day you smelled her cooking.
“I can take a break.”
>You get up from the couch and sit at the table while watching Connie.
>She notices and smiles.

“Sorry, your cooking pulled me away from writing.”
>>”I figured as much. You both seem to be addicted to it.”
>Furrowing your brow, you turn your head and see Rest approaching with a tired look on her face.
>”Good morning, surprised to see you up Eri.”
>She sits at the table and lets out a yawn.
“Like I told Connie, couldn’t stay asleep, so I came out here to write.”
>”Oh? Surprised you didn’t stay in bed to do it.”
“That’s because you were snoring.”
>Her eyes widen and you hear Connie giggle.
>”I-I don’t snore! Do I?”
>She looks back and forth between the two of you.
“Yeah, yeah you do Rest.”
>She blushes and buries her face in her hooves.
>”No pony ever tells me these things...”
>Well now you kinda feel bad, but it’s the truth.
>Connie sets a plate of pancakes in front of her.
>>”This should take your mind off of it.”
>Rest raises her head and sighs.
>”At least I know now.”
“It’s not so bad. You could be fucked up like me.”
>As she eats and waves her hoof.
>”Eri, that’s not fair to say. Sure you’re having trouble, but snoring is VERY minor in comparison.”
>She’s not wrong, even though you want to argue with her.
>As you sit there, you gently rub your leg, it’s still sore.
>Thankfully, you’re not limping anymore.
>Still can’t let either of them know you’ve been cutting yourself this trip.
>’Afraid they will leave you? You know they will.’
>They wouldn’t, they have stuck with me through this trip and more.
>’Then why not put it to the test if you’re so sure?’
>No, that’s just asking for trouble. They deal with enough bullshit from me.
>’Knew you would be too weak to show your vulnerabilities.’
>I know I’m weak, that’s nothing new. If I was actually strong, I wouldn’t be doing half the shit I do.
>’But you can’t trust them enough to tell them everything.’
>Fuck off.
>’You know that it’s the truth Eri. It always will be.’

>A plate of pancakes is placed in front of you, and you see Connie smile.
>>”Bit for your thoughts?”
>Yeah, why not?
“Just thinking about how this trip has gone.”
>Not entirely a lie, just don’t need to know your internal thoughts at the moment.
>”Oh? I think it’s gone pretty well.”
>>”I agree, it’s been great to hang out with you two. We really need to do it more often.”
>It’s clear they ignoring the incidents and trying to focus on the positives.
>You feel yourself slouch and mumble out your thoughts.
“...Despite me fucking up so much.”
>Almost immediately Rest snaps to you.
>”Eri, you’re being too hard on yourself. You can’t expect everything to go one hundred percent all the time.”
>You’re about to respond, but she continues on.
>”Besides, you’re forgetting how much progress you’ve made this trip. You rode a train to get here and even went to various public places with ponies. Even with those minor hiccups, I’d say that’s some pretty fucking amazing progress.”
>Taking a bite of your pancakes, you let out a sigh.
>She’s right, but you keep forgetting about that.
>It’s obvious why as well, so obvious that you don’t want to see it.
>You’re afraid of change.
>Sitting up once more, you give a small smile.
“Yeah, sorry. Just hard for me to accept it. Maybe one day I will.”
>As you take a drink, Connie joins you both at the table.
>>”Speaking from my own experience, you almost never notice your own progress as you develop. The only reason I know I’m growing better at playing, is because of others noticing. The point is, when eventually do notice your progress, it’s one of the best feelings in the world.”
>Of course they are both right on the matter.
>Would be nice to have the answers like they do, could make dealing with your own madness easier.
>’Keep telling yourself that. Who knows? You might one day believe that kind of delusional idea.’

>Ignoring that thought, you finish eating and get up to head to the bedroom.
>Before you leave the table entirely, Connie grabs your attention.
>>”Since today is the last day you’re both here, how about we hang out here?”
>Honestly, that sounds like a good idea.
>Sure you’ve enjoyed going out during this trip, but spending time with your friends here is just as enjoyable.
>Plus you can avoid anymore troubles with them around.
>You nod and feel a little happier.
“Sure, I’d like that.”
>”Me too, we have been out almost day since we’ve been here after all.”
>As Connie beams, you continue to head to the bedroom, but stop at the couch to grab your book and pencil.
>You’re starting to feel like you know what to write, and continue to your destination.
>Setting your stuff on the bed, you grab another hoodie and pause briefly at the sight of your razor.
>’Thinking about cutting yourself again? Go ahead, you need it after all Eri.’
>Shaking your head, you ignore it again.
“No, not today.”
>Heading to the bathroom, you start to fill the tub and look at your reflection.
>Moments like these allow you to really take in yourself.
>Your eyes still have bags under them and your mane is a mess, but honestly, you don’t really care.
>It’s still you looking back in the mirror.
>As you unwrap your bandage, it sticks to your coat in some places.
>Not surprising, its from from yesterday’s hasty job.
>The area around the cuts are stained a dark, nearly brown, red.
“Doesn’t look too bad.”
>’Are you certain of that?’
“No, but it doesn’t look as bad as yesterday.”
>’Kinda sad that you don’t know, despite cutting yourself so much.’
“Go away dammit...”
>’You can’t escape for-’
>Squeezing your leg, the pain silences the thoughts again.
>As you wince, you know you can’t keep doing this.
“Just have to hold out till I get home, that’s all.”

>Letting go, your leg hurts, but thankfully it isn’t bleeding.
>You turn off the facet and climb in to bathe, relaxing quickly.
>Though your mind doesn’t stray into dark territory, you feel uneasy.
>The answer is obvious as to why.
“I’ll be going home soon...”
>A stray tear rolls down the side of your face, and you blink away anymore forming.
>Taking a breath, you slowly release it to calm yourself.
>You raise your leg into view, and look at it closely as the water cleaned it away.
>Like you thought, it’s not so bad despite the cuts still being there.
>Sitting up, you clean up quickly so as to not waste time like previously.
>When you finish drying off, you decide to not wear a hoodie this time.
“No point in trying to hide the cuts, they are never going away.”
>When you reach the bedroom, you put away the hoodie and pick up your book to start writing again.
>You sit on the bed and grab your pencil, picking up where you left off.
>Even though the words flow freely, you keep stopping to erase the words.
“Feels like I’m never satisfied with my work...”
>Letting out a sigh, you continue to write for some time.
>Pausing again, you look it over and let out a sigh.
“Guess this is okay.”
>…
>Hopefully.
>You close your book, bringing it with you into the living room.
>>”-only thirty seconds too. I thought stallions lasted longer than that.”
>What the fuck?
>No wait, you clearly just walked into the tail end of the conversation.
>It’s not like Connie is actually talking-
>>”What’s worse, he tried to claim that most stallions have that little of stamina.”
>Okay, maybe she is.
>Before she can continue on, you need to know.
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
>She freezes, turning to you with a smile.
>Rest is sitting nearby and also smirking, probably because she saw you come into the room.

>>”I-uh-um...Going out for a run?”
>You raise an eyebrow.
“Really? Because it sounds like you’re talking about how long a stallion lasts in bed.”
>Connie’s face turns a bright red and Rest starts to laugh.
“So I’m right then? Didn’t think you’d be so lewd.”
>As her faces turns a deeper shade of red, she tries to explain herself.
>>”I-I can explain! It’s not what it sounds like!”
>Letting out a laugh of your own, you decide to push a little more.
“Uh-huh, sure...You’re totally not talking about some stallion blowing his load too early.”
>Rest laughs even harder now, and you feel pretty damn happy yourself.
>>”It was just a friend asking me for advice, it’s not like I slept with him! That’s all I swear!”
>Shaking your head, you join Rest on the couch and give a big shit eating grin.
“So you’re telling me, that a ‘friend’, asked you for advice about his dick?”
>She nods quickly.
>>”Yes! His marefriend had been a little upset, so I asked him what was wrong. We eventually discussed about his bedroom time, and he brought that up out of the blue. It was hard to keep a straight face the whole time, I felt so bad.”
>You can’t help it.
“I bet his marefriend wanted him to be hard longer too.”
>A loud thump pulls your attention, and you see Rest rolling around laughing.
>”Stop! Ahahahaha! It’s-haha-hurting to laugh!”
>Letting out a fake sigh, you roll your eyes and sit back.
“Alright, alright. Couldn’t help myself.”
>As she slowly calms down, Connie’s face returns to normal, mostly.
>Probably the best time for this.
“So...Um...I wrote something that I wanted to share.”
>They both perk up.
>”Alright.”
>>”I’d love to hear it as always Eri.”
>Smiling, you open up your book, close your eyes, and take a breath in slowly.

>Reopening your eyes, you exhale and start.

Though I have journeyed far
I have finally raised myself to a new bar
And though I still fear
I am with friends that I hold dear

Each day was a blast
But those are now in the past
The mornings were fun to behold
And the evenings had me sold

While my vacation was blissful
It could have turned out more peaceful
The memories I held close
Are the ones I enjoyed the most

Soon I will leave this place
And with it, my heart will be encased
But I have more days to come
Even when it seems like there is none

As this draws to its end
My mind will always mend
Though I am still a pest
I still have my friends, Connie and Rest

>Looking back up to them, they both clop in applause.
>You feel so overjoyed that you tear up.
“T-thanks, I know it’s not the b-best, but I tried anyways.”
>Connie shakes her head.
>>”I keep telling you that your work is good Eri, you will see it in time.
>Maybe someday, but not today.
>Rest touches your wither and smiles.
>”It’s true you know. We don’t just say that because we’re your friends.”
“Yeah, I know...It’s hard for me accept sometimes.”
>More like all the time, but who knows?
>Wiping away any tears, you see the nearby clock and frown.
>Connie looks over and lets out a sigh.
>>”Looks like we should get going to the station.”
>As Rest sees the clock, she nods.
>”Yeah, don’t want to be late for our train.”
>Does it really have to end?
>Yes, but that doesn’t mean you can’t hang out with them again.
>As the two of you pack your things, you feel a pit forming in your stomach.
>You both head out into the other room and see Connie wearing a half smile.
>She looks like she wants to say something, but instead leads you three outside.
>The taxi ride is silent, and you can feel the tension building.
>At the station, it finally breaks when you and Rest approach the train.

>Connie quickly pulls you both into a group hug, one you hold onto for as long as you can.
>>”I’m gonna miss you two, write back to me.”
>”I promise that we will.”
“This sucks that it has to end.”
>Connie sniffles.
>>”It’s okay, we got to spend so much time together, I don’t regret a single day.”
>”That’s right, it was all worth it.”
>You say nothing, you’d rather not break down again.
>As Connie pulls out of the hug, she is teary eyed and wipes them away.
>The conductor calls out for ponies to board.
>”Guess we should go, take care Connie.”
>>”You too.”
>Quickly, you hug Connie one last time before boarding.
>Your tears fall freely as you quietly cry.
>You find your seat and Rest joins you.
>”It’s going to be okay, we will see her again.”
>Sniffling, you nod.
>The train starts to move, and you look out the window to see Connie waving.
>You wave back until you can’t see her anymore.
>Sitting back, you let out a sigh and slowly, you get yourself back under control.
“Maybe next time, she can visit us in Ponyville.”
>”That would be nice, we can probably plan it out soon.”
>Nodding, you watch the scenery.
>You’re on your way home, but honestly, you could get used to going out more.