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Lost Time

By: Xzon on Jun 23rd, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 4.99 KB  |  hits: 38  |  expires: Never
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  1. >Day 435 in equestria
  2. >Twilight asked you to come by her house later on to try some 'experiments'
  3. >Your sure she didn't mean anything sexual in anyway what so ever
  4. >...you think
  5. >Oh well, might as well get this over with
  6. >You strut your way out the door, careful to avoid any traps set out by fluttershy
  7. >After about five minutes of copious amounts of swag, twilights library comes into view
  8. >You strut your way in and are greeted by everyones favorite purple dragon, spike
  9. "Hey little bro, whats up?"
  10. >"Oh, hey anon. Not much, just twilight going on about 'chronology magic' or something or other"
  11. "The hell does chronology magic mean?"
  12. >"I dont know, do I look like a dictionary?"
  13. "No, that roles already filled by sweetie bell. Well, guess I'll just go ask her myself"
  14. >You enter the main room, and twilight comes up to you looking very excited
  15. >You were starting to regret this
  16.  
  17. >"Hi anon! I'm almost done putting the finishing touches on a new spell that will surely knock your socks off!"
  18. "Uh, great. Just curious though, what exactly does this spell do?"
  19. >"It alters a selected individuals understanding of the cosmological chronology of the universe!"
  20. "So... basicaly, it fucks with time?"
  21. >"Yep!"
  22. "And you see nothing wrong with this?"
  23. >"Uh, no? It's just a simple spell, what could possibly go wrong?"
  24. >Clearly, someone didn't read science fiction
  25. "I don't know, Its just... where did you even find something like this?"
  26. >"In the Starswirl the Bearded wing of the Canterlot Archives"
  27. "The what in the where?"
  28. >"Just stand over there"
  29. "O-Okay"
  30. >Twilight begins charging up her magic, and her eyes start to glow
  31. >You can feel the air in the room start to weigh down on you, and a metallic taste settles in the back of your throat
  32. >You were DEFINETLY starting to regret this
  33. >Shit Nigga, what are you doing!?
  34. >Shes gonna zap you with something that alters fucking time!!
  35. >Oh hello common sense, nice of you to join us
  36. >Shut up! You need to get out of there now!
  37. >lol nope. Too late now faggot. Nothing left to do now except enjoy the ride
  38. >You can see twilight is clearly struggling, from the beads of sweat coming down her face, and from seeing twilight struggle quite a lot in your time
  39. >Simple spell my ass
  40. >Suddenly, theres a bright flash, and everything slows down
  41. >And then freezes completely
  42. >Shit, what did twilight do to you?
  43. >Everything in the library is completely still
  44. >Twilight is locked in a state of intense concentration
  45. >Spike remains with a look of mild disintrest
  46. >A few books float in the air, unmoving
  47. >As you move towards twilight, you bump into one, and it moves a couple centimetres, then stops
  48. >Everything has stopped, frozen in time
  49.  
  50. AlmostAverageAnon: Anon runs around and uses his newfound power to slap every p0ny in p0nyville at random, and cause a huge scare of ghosts in equestria
  51.  
  52. >Well then
  53. >This is certainly new
  54. >Hey, common sense, were still friends, right?
  55. >I warned you bro! I told you about fucking with time!
  56. >Fine, be that way
  57. >In the meantime, you have some newfound powers to abuse
  58. >You walk outside to discover that time is in the same state here as in the library
  59. >Ponies are standing still, some are floating above the ground, and one has a goofy look stuck to its face
  60. >Stop that goofy pony; you look rediculious
  61. >You go to fix it, but then you think to yourself
  62. >If you can change one pony's expression from weird to normal, whats to stop you from doing the reverse?
  63. >Nothing, thats what!
  64. >You rearrange goofy pony's face into an acceptably retarded fashion
  65. >We artists now!
  66. >There are a few other ponies nearby, the flower trio
  67. >You never did like them
  68. >Nows your chance to take revenge on them for what they never did to you
  69.  
  70. >You lift daisy into the air and flip her upside down
  71. >Shes a bit heavy, but you can manage
  72. >Next up is rose
  73. >You flip her upside down, and put her end to end with daisy
  74. >Lily follows soon after, and is placed to the side at an appealing angle
  75. >Just a bit more and.. perfect!
  76. >If only you had a way to capture the moment..
  77. >Oh wait, you totaly do
  78. >You grab a camera from a tourist, who is now standing on a rooftop at an impossible angle
  79. >Returning to the flower girls, you quickly snap a picture of their unfortunate pricadament
  80. >Fucking Priceless
  81. >Hey, look over there! Its applejack and rainbow dash!
  82. >Don't they just look cute together
  83. >You move their forarms over one another, so that it looks like their in a loving embrace
  84. >Aww... they finally discovered their true feelings for each other
  85. >You snap another picture to save the moment
  86. >You would probably need to hide this
  87.  
  88. >Fluttershy was caught just outside an adult book store
  89. >Of fucking course
  90. >You go over to her, and whisper into her ear
  91. "All this time, you've been trying to find my fetish. Well I'll tell you my fetish. It was...
  92. >Kneeling down to her, your voice is barely audible
  93. "...defenastration"
  94. >You then pick her up, and throw her through the pornshops window
  95. >She doesn't hit the ground though, due to lack of inertia
  96. >So you take another picture
  97. >Hahaha
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