Don't like ads? PRO users don't see any ads ;-)
Public Pastes

sausagepreview

By: TheUnbr0ny on Nov 5th, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 2.63 KB  |  hits: 27  |  expires: Never
download  |  raw  |  embed  |  report abuse  |  print
Text below is selected. Please press Ctrl+C to copy to your clipboard. (⌘+C on Mac)
  1. >You are Sausagerollinz.
  2. >Well, that’s what you go by on the internet, more specifically 4chan and Tinychat.
  3. >You just finished reading the final chapter of Unfaggot’s “Tex-Eques”.
  4. >Asshole had forced you to stay up too late waiting for the promised post.
  5. >Again.
  6. >Fucking nigger*.
  7. >You’d have to chew him out again tomorrow evening; now you were tired.
  8. >You yawn and stretch your arms.
  9. >Time for bed.
  10. >You get up and throw on your usual sleepwear before you promptly collapse on the bed, narrowly avoiding your tulpa.
  11. >She’d started off as an accident, a mistake created through trickery by an old friend.
  12. >Thought you’d abolished her from your mind.
  13. >You were wrong.
  14. >She hid for two years, and popped up again recently.
  15. >Since then you’d grown attached.
  16. >Thought of fucking her still creeped you out though.
  17. >You manage to crawl under your bedsheets and go to sleep.
  18.  
  19. >Next evenining, hop on T1ny chat.
  20. >You’d hopped off the PC for a bit to get some food, as Unfaggot hadn’t been there when you logged on after school.
  21. >This wasn’t new for him; he had a tendency to oversleep, one that pissed you the fuck off.
  22. >Time to check the T1ny chat.
  23. >Sure enough, Unfaggot is there.
  24. >NOT WRITING.
  25. >AS USUAL.
  26. >No, he’s playing Left 4 Dead 2.
  27. >Ever since he got it he’s been spending MORE time playing that and LESS time writing.
  28. >You log in and hear him bitching about the Hunter that just pinned him and about how his team is shit, even though HE ran ahead of them.
  29. >When he finally notices you, his usual response over the speakers:
  30. >”There’s saw sage. Hey there, faggot.”
  31. >You click on the blank space where you would put text.
  32. >However, just as you’re about to start typing the room starts spinning.
  33. >You hit the floor with a thud.
  34.  
  35. >You shoot awake and promptly wish your eyes had stayed closed.
  36. >Oh shit.
  37. >You look around you and take note of the vibrant colors, the bright blue sky and the sun above.
  38. “FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKKK!”
  39. >You were in Equestria.
  40.  
  41. Coming in the near future to an AiE thread near you…
  42.  
  43. Watch as Sausage struggles to survive in the magical land of Equestria!
  44. Laugh at his misery as he’s forced to communicate with pastel p0nies!
  45. Hold your breath as he risks his life (the whole penny it’s worth) to save the land from the evil King Sombrero!
  46. Feel as he struggles to deal with his own feelings like the pussy he is!
  47. Rage as I continue my pattern of late/ last second updates!
  48. All this and more in: IRON SAUSAGE IN EQUESTRIA!
  49.  
  50. *Note, I do not use this word to insult any race or group of individuals within a race. This is an accurate representation of how Sausage talks in t1ny chat.
create a new version of this paste RAW Paste Data