- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlHmGy4Aq_g&t=0m50s
- >The glass in your hand was just about empty, the lager in it turning to thin foam as you finished it off.
- >Rainbow sat next to you, cradling a mug of cider.
- >It’s pretty much the only thing she was willing to drink in this place, despite your protests.
- >You had tried giving her some rum you got in from a friend in Fillydelphia, but the stuff only made her gag.
- >Dash knocks back her mug, slamming it to the wood of the bar with a satisfied exhale.
- >Wiping away the foam on her lips she looks to you and grins.
- >”So you have to tell me, what was life in Manehatten like?”
- “Oh it was nice for a time. If you use the word nice in the same capacity as the word shitty, that is.”
- >”Oh please, there must have been fun to be had somewhere in that city.”
- “Not really. My best nights were spent with a handful of mates down at a bar like this. Only thing missing here is a decent dart board. That and quality booze.”
- >Dash raises her empty mug to the bartender, ordering another drink.
- >”That’s why I stick to cider. I can’t get drunk as quickly on this stuff as opposed to whatever the heck it is you drink.”
- “It’s beer.”
- >”Yeah. And it’s nasty.”
- “One of these days I’ll have you nursing a bottle of whiskey late into the evening, mark my words.”
- >You slide the empty glass of lager down the bar, pulling out your flask from your coat and down the liquor within.
- >As your throat feels that old familiar burn, you pass the flask to Rainbow.
- >”What do you want me to do with this?”
- “I want you to kiss it and start a family. It’s a flask, Dash. The fuck do you think you’re supposed to do with it?”
- >She rolls her eyes and takes it, sniffing the whiskey within.
- “Don’t be a feckin’ baby. Drink it.”
- >Dash sighs, and takes a sip.
- >She cringes a bit at the taste, but perks her ears up all the same.
- >”This… isn’t that bad, actually.”
- “Told you. So, what do you want to know?”
- >”Well you never told me what you did after getting out of the orphanage, so-“
- “Not something I tell often, Dash. Sorry.”
- >It’s true. Dash was your best friend out here, but not even she knew about the gang you ran with back in Manehatten.
- >So far, Twilight was the only one to know about that.
- >You nod as you reach for a cigarette in your shirt pocket, craving a smoke right about now.
- >To your dismay, you find that the small carton is empty save one last cigarette.
- “Well fuck me…”
- >Dash takes another sip, this time larger than the last.
- >”What’s the matter?”
- “I’m out of cigarettes.”
- >”So? Just go get some more.”
- “Dash, there’s only one place in town that grows tobacco and sells cigarettes.”
- >”Right.”
- >You cock your head as you stare at her, waiting for it to sink in.
- >”…oh.”
- “Right.”
- >Ponyville had only one distributor when it came to tobacco products.
- >The Apple Family.
- >And right now, the Apple Family wasn’t taking very kindly to you.
- >Well, the men in the clan weren’t, that is.
- >Your hand reaches for your face, rubbing the space between your eyes.
- “Guess I can head down there tomorrow, see if they’ll sell me a carton or two.”
- >A voice from behind you chimes in on your predicament.
- >”Or ya could just ask me considerin’ Ah’m right here.”
- >Glancing over your shoulder, you spot Applejack sauntering over to the bar, sitting next to you and raising a hoof to the bartender.
- “Evening lass. What brings you here tonight?”
- >”Thought Ah’d get off the farm for a night. Might try to find a nice bed that doesn’t smell like hay t’sleep in.”
- >She gives you a sly grin as she snatches the glass of cider that slides down to her.
- “Sorry love, but whenever I think I might have at you, your family tends to use me as their own personal punching bag.”
- >”Aw, and here Ah was thinkin’ you were the dangerous type.”
- >She gives you a wink as she takes a drink from her glass.
- >Dammit she wasn’t making it easy to resist tempting fate.
- >Dash pulls you over to her, whispering into your ear.
- >”Don’t.”
- “Oh come on what’s the worst that could happen?”
- >”You could wake up to a bunch of stallions with murder in their eyes. That’s one thing.”
- “True, true… BUT, that would imply that I also wake up with that mare next to me in the morning.”
- >Rainbow groans and shoves you over, drinking from your flask still.
- >You turn to Applejack as she adjusts herself in on her barstool to get a better look at you.
- >”So… are you th’dangerous type?”
- “Maybe. You aren’t worried that your brother and his goons might try to kick my teeth in?”
- >She grins, biting her lower lip softly as she brings a hoof to your chest.
- >”Somethin’ tells me you’re even less concerned with that happenin’, sugarcube.”
- >Time to weigh the options in your head it seems.
- >On one hand, you could try to bed the mare next to you and have a right good time at it as well.
- >On the other hand, her family would try to flay you alive if you actually had a roll in the proverbial hay with her.
- >It was a tough decision, that was for sure.
- >”Ah know a quiet little place near here, right behind the bar. Once you make up yer mind-“
- >She hops off her stool, flicking her tail upwards and brushing your chin with it, letting you steal a peek at what’s up for grabs.
- >”-just come back there and we can get better… acquainted.”
- >She walks away from you and out the bar.
- >Dash lets out a sigh of relief.
- >”She’s gone. Good. Jeez man, I thought you were actually going to go and-“
- >You snatch your flask out of her hooves and bring it to your lips, tilting your head back.
- >”Whoa the hell are you doing?”
- >You raise you hand, signaling her to wait while you down the entire container, slipping it into your coat once you finish.
- “Excuse me Dash, but I have a country girl to go tame.”
- >”You cannot be ser-“
- “Cheers.”
- >You hop out of your seat and walk out of the bar, leaving Dash to shake her head in her hooves.
- >The prospect of having a night with AJ.
- >Heavy risk.
- >But the prize.
- >Standing in front of the bar door, you take your last cigarette and light it, taking a deep breath for good luck.
- >Turning the corner and walking down the alleyway, you spot Applejack standing underneath a neon sign for the store next door.
- >You walk up to her, a sly smile on her face as she makes her way to you, her orange fur illuminated by the green neon light behind her.
- “So lass, where shall we begin, aye?”
- >You bring a hand to her face, stroking her cheek gently.
- >She smiles at you.
- >”Ah’m afraid Ah’ve got some bad news.”
- >She cranes her head passed you and nods, as the sound of hooves walking up to you sounds off.
- “Shite.”
- >You whirl around and ball a fist, clocking a medium sized colt right in the jaw, sending him yelping to the ground.
- >”The hell are you doin’?!”
- >Applejack trots up to you and crouches down at the colt as he nurses his jaw.
- “Here I thought you were interested, when you were really just tryin’ to get the jump on me.”
- >”The jump- he’s here t’make a deal with you ya jittery son of a bitch!”
- >The colt rubs his jaw as he gets up, smiling.
- >”It’s alright Applejack. You were right, he’s one mean bastard. Meaner right hook, by the look of it.”
- “Who the fuck are you?”
- >The colt brushes some dust off his chest and nods his head, holding a hoof out to you.
- >”Time Turner. It’s a pleasure, really.”
- “Uh huh. Any reason you’re sneaking up on me while I’m trying to get lucky with our blonde friend over here?”
- >Applejack blushes lightly as she stands next to Turner.
- >”Applejack here came to me with a proposition. She tells me that her brother and some of his friends gave you quite the thrashing a few nights ago.”
- “Did she also tell you the part about me being the only conscious one to walk out of that feckin’ barn? Or did she gloss over that bit?”
- >Time Turner smiles and gives a short laugh.
- >”Oh no, she most certainly mentioned that part. In fact, that was the part I took a bit of interest in.”
- >You raise an eyebrow while rubbing your hand.
- >Applejack speaks up.
- >”We want you to fight.”
- >…
- “In the quiet words of the virgin Mary… come again?”
- >”Turner here runs a small fightin’ circuit. Underground sorta thing. He wants you t’fight fer him.”
- >You look from Applejack to Time Turner, then back to Applejack.
- “If he wants me to fight then why the fuck are you comin’ to me in a bar and hitting me up?”
- >”Because she has a personal stake in the next fight,” Turner responds.
- >”Bic Mac is in the next fight,” Applejack chimes in. “We want you to go into that ring and win it.”
- “We?”
- >”Mac has been the most overbearing bastard to me fer the longest time. Ah’d like t’see him get taken down a peg.”
- >You take a drag of your cigarette, mulling this over.
- “Alright, let’s say I’m your fighter. What the fuck is in it for me?”
- >”Other than your share of the winnings? You’d be making 40% of the total pool. And trust me, once I announce you as my fighter, the betting will go through the roof.”
- >You look over to Applejack.
- “I want cigarettes.”
- >”Deal. How many?”
- “Five cartons.”
- >”Done.”
- “Then you’ve got yourself a fuckin’ fighter.”
- >You shake their hooves, Turner smiling ear to ear.
- >”Perfect! The fight is in three days at the Apple family cellar. I’ll stay in touch.”
- >He walks off and you turn back to Applejack.
- “So Ms. Applejack, about you and I…”
- >She giggles and shakes her head.
- >”Sorry darlin’, no can do. Ah was just doin’ Turner a favor. However…”
- >She pushes your back to the brick wall, her hooves on your shoulders.
- >”..Ah don’t see why Ah can’t get to know you after ya win yer big fight…”
- >Running a hand down her neck and using the other to take the cigarette out of your mouth, Applejack kisses you deeply.
- >When she breaks away from you she exhales, your smoke trailing from her nostrils.
- >”Some other time, lover boy.”
- >She hops back down, smiling as she saunters off.
- “Fuckin’ tease…”
- >Putting your cigarette back into your mouth, you turn around and head back for the bar.
- >If you were going home alone tonight, then the best you could do to make up for it was to get a bit drunker with Dash.
- >Entering the bar, you’re greeted with a sight you didn’t need to see.
- >The three colts from the other night are currently surrounding Rainbow, sneering at each other as they try to make a pass at her.
- >Seems they got ballsy since you left the bar.
- >But for now, they don’t see you.
- >You stride calmly up to the one in the middle, their leader, and tap him on the shoulder.
- >”Yeah what the hell do you wa-“
- >He freezes, his eyes widening in fear when turns around to see you.
- >Taking drag of your cigarette, you glance at all three of them before locking eyes with the colt in the middle.
- “Listen to me and listen close. You, my friend, are a dick.”
- >”We’re not looking for trouble, man.”
- “So, you are obviously the “big” dick. The colts on the side of ya are your balls. Now there are two types of balls. There are big brave balls, and there are little mincey faggot balls.”
- >You take the glass in his hooves from him, drinking his beer.
- “Now, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but they are not clever. They smell pussy and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old pussy, and have brought your two little mincey faggot balls along for a good old time.”
- >You finish his beer and toss the glass in your hand up and down, not breaking eye contact with him.
- >His friends on each side of him begin to back up, their legs shaking.
- “But you've got your parties muddled up. There's no pussy here… just a dose that'll make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick, you are having second thoughts. You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you.”
- >The middle colt gulps down air, his ears turned downwards.
- “Now… fuck off.”
- >They start to back away, but the one in the middle puffs out his chest and glares at you, confident for some reason.
- >”Joke’s on you, my cousin is here!”
- “Why the fuck should I care about your god damn-“
- >Pain flashes through your head as it’s slammed to the bar buy a rather… buff, pegasis.
- >”NOBP0NY MESSES WITH ROY-D-RAGE OR HIS FAMILY.”
- “Fuckin’ hell, why do I always piss off the burly fuckers?”
- >You get up, rubbing your head as you do so when you come eye to eye with this guy.
- “Creepy eyes you got there, mate.”
- >”WERE YOU MESSIN WITH MY COUSIN?”
- “Say I was. Are you going to kick the livin’ shite out of me for doing it?”
- >”EEEYEEEAAAAH.”
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogzlmuH7nuY&feature=related
- >You lean up on the bar, grabbing Dash’s glass of cider.
- >You raise it to Roy-D-Rage, and take a long gulp.
- “Cheers, shit head.”
- >His nostrils flare and one of his eyes begin to twitch, along with his little wings.
- >Time to take him down a peg.
- “I see you’ve got yourself some tiny wings. I take it that you’re as ripped as you are as a sort of compensation, aye?”
- >”The BUCK did you say to me?”
- “Ah nothin’, I was just insinuating that you’re not comfortable havin’ small appendages.”
- >He begins heaving as he breathes harder and harder.
- “What’s the matter? Strike a chord in that wee brain of yours? I’m guessing it’s about the size of your wings. Among other things.”
- >That’s done it.
- >He charges you, flying as fast as he can at you.
- >You grin.
- >Twi had better know how to get glass out of a hand.
- >You side step him, bringing the thick glass mug right into his face, shattering it to pieces.
- >He barrels into the bar while yelling about his face, when you grab him by the shoulders and pound him into the bar, sliding him down it’s length and throwing him to the ground.
- >All of a sudden his cousin and his cunt friends rush you, tackling you to the ground.
- “Dash, I could use a hoof over here!”
- >She zips over and clocks the one with a mullet square in the jaw, while you toss the others off you.
- >Grasping a colt, you pick him up and toss him to Rainbow Dash, who head butts him to the floor.
- >Roy groans.
- >You send a boot to his stomach, shutting him up.
- “Dash, I think we’re done here. Pay the bartender like a good mare, will ya?”
- >”It’s your turn to cover the tab though.”
- “Aye, it is. I also got these cunts off your back earlier.”
- >”Point taken.”
- >She trots over to the bartender and tosses him your pay, and the two of you leave.
- >As the two of you walk down the street you try your best to pick at the glass in your hand, whincing slightly as you do so.
- “Fuck me, I had to go and break the glass over his face didn’t I?”
- >”You have a habit of doing that.”
- “True. Might as well buy the bartender a set for Hearths Warming Eve.”
- >Dash giggles at your joke before asking you some more questions.
- >”So, what happened with Applejack?”
- >You roll your eyes and run your good hand through your hair.
- “She wasn’t looking for anything intimate. Turns out she was buttering me up to join some sort of fight club bein’ run by a guy named “Time Turner.”
- >”So what did you do?”
- “I said yes. My first fight is in three days.”
- >Rainbow pumps her hoof a few times in cheer.
- >”Dude I cannot WAIT to watch that. Where’s it at?”
- “Sweet Apple Acres. Their cellar, in fact.”
- >”This is going to rock. Who are you fighting, do you know?”
- >You give a smarmy grin.
- “Macintosh.”
- >”This. Will be. Awesome.”
- >You agree with her. Getting a chance to go up against Big Mac one on one is sounding like a dream come true at the moment.
- >Eventually Dash says her goodbyes and flies off to her house above Pnyville, while you stumble down to the library.
- >Making it to the cellar door in the back, you decide not to bother Twilight about your hand until tomorrow morning.
- >It was late after all.
- >Throwing open the cellar door and making your way into the basement, you walk over to the desk where you placed the book Twi had given you.
- >Adventure novel huh?
- >You suppose a quick read wouldn’t hurt anybo-
- >…
- >You could see your painting in the corner of your room.
- >The sheet was off the easal, hanging on the chair nearby.
- >…
- ”Come out Tink, I know you’re in here.”
- >…
- “Twilight. Now.”
- >…
- >Reluctantly, Twilight Sparkle carefully trots out from behind a few cardboard boxes, hanging her head slightly.
- >”…did you hurt your hand? It’s… well it’s bleeding.”
- “Twi.”
- >She trots up to you, trying to divert the subject.
- >”Let me just-“
- “Twi!”
- >She cringes and gives a weak smile.
- “Did you. Look at. My paintings.”
- >”…”
- “…”
- >Twilight loses the fake smile, takes a deep breath, and gives a small, real smile.
- >”They’re lovely, Anon. I… I guess I was just curious as to why you needed so much paint. I mean I figured you were painting, that was obvious, but… Anon some of these are breath taking.”
- >Carefully, she floats over a painting of a landscape you had done.
- >”Like this one. I don’t think I’ve ever seen something this vivid before! The green hills, the water on the shore… Anon this is just beautiful. I don’t remember seeing anything like this in Equestria, though.”
- “It’s not from Equestria. It’s on Earth.”
- >Her eyes widen.
- >”These… these paintings are of Earth? Where? Did you-“
- “No. You know what I’m concerned about.”
- >She turns her head, looking at the canvas behind her.
- >When she looks back at you, she blushes and nods.
- “What did you think?”
- >”Wha-… what?”
- >You walk over to your painting, pick it up, and show it to her.
- “What did you think?”
- >She looks away from you, but you walk back up to her, kneeling.
- >The painting you were hiding all this time was one of her.
- >One of Twilight.
- >You had wanted to make her it.
- >Sort of a way to say “thank you,” for her taking you in.
- “Well?”
- >Your stern demeanor softens a bit now.
- >Maybe it was the booze
- >She looks back up at you, that small embarrassed smile on her face still.
- >”I… think it’s wonderful, Anon.”
- “Really?”
- >”Yes. Really.”
- “Good. You ruined a fine surprise you did.”
- >”Anon… you’re strange.”
- “Am I now?”
- >You get back to your feet, placing the canvas on your bed.
- >”You like to play a mean game. A tough guy act. But you know what? I think you have a soft spot.”
- “Isn’t that nice? Now would you mind helpin’ me get all this feckin’ glass out of my hand?”
- >You sit down in your chair, and Twilight sighs, walking over to you.
- >As magic envelopes your hand and the shards within start to pop out, you look at Twilight.
- >Despite everything, she let you stay here in her home.
- >She was right. You were a brute and a drunk.
- >Yet she let you stay.
- >She patched you up.
- >Why?
- Maybe it was so she could run more of those tests on you.
- >Maybe it was so she could suck up to that princess of hers.
- >Maybe…
- >But still, she let you stay here all the same.
- >…
- “Thank you.”
- >Twilight looks up at you, her ears perked up and her eyebrows raised.
- >”Did… did you just thank me?”
- >You nod.
- “Aye.”
- >”I-… you’re welcome, Anon.”
- >She smiles warmly at you, before going back to inspecting your hand.
- >”I really do love the portrait.”
- “I’m glad… so do I.”
- >You can see her cheeks redden a tad before she releases your hand of her magic.
- >”All done. Hope that helped.”
- “It did. Can I ask you something?”
- >”Oh uhm… okay. Go ahead.”
- “Would you like to come watch beat the piss out of Big Macintosh?”
- >”W-what? What?! Why would I-“
- “It’s an actual fight, Twi. A real one. With a crowd and everything.”
- >She puts a hoof to her face and groans.
- >”Why do you always have to do this?”
- “So is that a yes? Should I go ahead and reserve a seat for ya?”
- >She closes her eyes in thought, then sighs.
- >”It’s a maybe.”
- >She flinches when you grab her chin and give her a light kiss on the lips, smiling at her.
- “Thanks love. Could use the moral support.”
- >”I-I-I- yes well that’s- that’s good. Yes.”
- >Flustered and a bit confused, Twilight backs away towards the stairs.
- >”I… am going to go to bed now. Yeah. Bed.”
- “Evenin’.”
- >”Yes. Good evening. Right.”
- >She stares at you for a bit before eventually teleporting away in a snap, only to reappear one again.
- >She trots over to your bed, grabs her portrait, blushes at you, and teleports away once more.
- >You give a dry laugh, chuckling to yourself.
- >Mares.
- ~END~

