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Asshole Anon - Part 5: Yellow pone strikes back

By: Mariomike on Aug 18th, 2013  |  syntax: None  |  size: 2.77 KB  |  hits: 70  |  expires: Never
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  1. >Day it’s time in Equestria.
  2. >Most ponies have gone to help with Sweet Apple Acres, forgetting about the issue of you.
  3. >You need to strike now.
  4. >You don’t bring anything, other than a blow horn, and you sprint to the outskirts of ponyville.
  5. >Yellow pone time.
  6. >You get up, and burst into the door.
  7. >Nobody is home.
  8. >Time to get to work.
  9. >You grab 2 bags of animal chow, so that you’d be able to attract most of fluttershys animals to one spot.
  10. >Angel tries attacking you, but you shove him into blender.
  11. >No, I didn’t turn it on you sick fuck.
  12. >You take all other bags of animal food and switch them around.
  13. >You give meat to the herbivores and plants to the carnivores.
  14. >All of them will be hungry.
  15. >Perfect.
  16. >You scoop up all animal dropping and bring them up to Fluttershy’s room.
  17. >You fill her pillow case with the droppings, and throw the rest of them on the bed.
  18. >You notice a nearby empty birdhouse and slam the droppings that are on the bed, permanently sticking them to the bed sheets.
  19. >You tear off the curtains in her bedroom and head downstairs.
  20. >You dump the various foods onto the curtain, then tie it up, but very loosely.
  21. >Now, you wait for her return.
  22. >After a good 10 minutes, you can finally start seeing her in the distance.
  23. >Many hungry animals were sniffing your food curtain. They have to wait.
  24. >You start spinning it, as she gets closer
  25. >and closer
  26. >and
  27. >closer
  28. >And you throw it
  29. >Direct hit.
  30. >The curtain explodes on contact, covering her in food.
  31. >The hungry animals slowly start walking towards her.
  32. >”W-Wait!”
  33. >Too late for that.
  34. >All animals run towards her, and trample her.
  35. >All the animals start scratching her and biting her to get their food.
  36. >Finally, she doesn’t something.
  37. >”STOOOOP!”
  38. >She starts giving them the stare, lecturing them.
  39. >Calming them…
  40. >Just as planned.
  41. >Shame really, she did have quite a talent.
  42. >”Now go back to your home-“
  43. >You blow the air horn.
  44. >Complete chaos ensues. Fluttershy jumps 20 feet in the air, then falls back with her legs straight up in the air. And then she got trampled.
  45. >Bear, Rabbits, Squirrels, Deer, all were running around in complete chaos.
  46. >And they were shitting EVERYWHERE.
  47. >You shuffle through all of them, grab Fluttershy, and head inside.
  48. >”A—Anon… Why did you do this…?”
  49. “I’ve been doing it to everyone so far.”
  50. >”It’s… Been you all along?”
  51. “Yes. And Rainbow Dash is next.”
  52. >You get in closer to her ear, and whisper….
  53. “And no one will stop me.”
  54. >With a kiss to the cheek, and confused and terrified Fluttershy, and a complete and literal shitstorm going on outside, you figure the best to finish this pony is just a swift punch to the ear.
  55. >And she was out cold.
  56. >It was finally time.
  57. “Rainbow dash.”
  58. “Where are yooou?”
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