Anon and Chrysalis Ch 14

The Marvellous Mishaps of Anon and Chrysalis

Chapter 14: Rainbows aren’t a physical thing guys lets be serious please

 

>Light shines into your cozy home, washing over you.

>Fuck your shit Celestia. Seriously, I didn’t ask for all this light.

>Groaning you get out of your bed. You walk toward the bright light.

>In a swift motion that would make all the world’s ninjas infinitely jealous, you close the blinds.

>Yep. You’ve still got it.

>Yawning you throw on some pants and exit your room.

>The hallways are empty; it’s too early to expect anyone else to be up.

>You walk downstairs. You move to enter your kitchen but stop.

>Your TV is on. Who’s up this early?

>You enter your living room instead, looking for the culprit.

>It’s that weird unicorn from before. Sindri or something.

“Sindri? Why are you still here?”

>”Bale wants to know how that show ends. Normally I wouldn’t even bother with this but his whining is disrupting my planning.”

“Oh. Hm.”

>You look at your TV. Sindri clearly has no idea what the fuck he’s doing; he isn’t even on the right channel.

“Well, more or less the two orgasm and lie together happily. Not much more too it.”

>Sindri narrows his eyes at you. You smile nervously.

 

>”Hmph. I see. I was hoping for something more original. Oh well.”

>He gets off of your couch, magically lifting up a dark purple helmet from the floor.

>He quickly puts it on then begins to walk out.

“Just curious Sindri... What are you exactly? You don’t seem to be a normal pony.”

>”I’m not a normal pony. Let’s leave it at that. Now if you’ll excuse me, Bale has probably made a mess of our defensive lines again...”

>He walks past you, leaving your home in short order.

“Well that was interesting.”

>You shrug. Whatever he’s talking about is none of your concern.

>You enter your kitchen and make some food.

>Sitting at your kitchen table you take a bite of your food. Well at least you can still make eggs right.

>You wonder what you’ll do today. There’s not really anything to do.

>Perhaps you could chill with Rainbro or something.

>Thinking about it reminds you that she never did get to see that Wonderbolts show.

>She didn’t /seem/ upset on the train ride back, but you know /something/ is up.

>You rise from your seat and dump your dishes in the sink. Meh. You’ll do them later.

 

 >Ponyville is fairly calm this early. It’s not like when you visited Applejack; of course not.

>You swore you’d never get up that early ever again.

>You casually stroll down to the other side of Ponyville.

>None of your normal pony companions are out and about, so you make good time.

>You look up at Rainbow Dash’s cloud home. It really is an amazing construction.

>Definitely cooler than that one Luna brought out of nowhere.

 >You cone your hands over your mouth to focus your pending verbal assault.

“Hey Rainbow Dash! You there?”

>You wait for a response from your rainbow maned friend.

>A few minutes pass, making you consider yelling out again. However just then a multicoloured head pops over the edge of the cloud palace.

>You think it smiles at you, but you can’t tell precisely from the distance.

>The mare takes flight, landing in front of you. She’s definitely smiling now!

“Hey Rainbro, how you doing?”

>”Pretty good Anon. What’s up?”

“Well, I was thinking we’d go do something. You know the two of us. We barely ever hang out anymore...”

>She nods, “Yeah... Well where to Anon?”

“...I don’t know. I was hoping you had some ideas.”

 

>She rolls her eyes, “Of course. Hm. Well I guess we could uh...”

“No ideas either?”

>She smiles sheepishly, “Not particularly, no. I was just gonna chill for the day.”

“Well then let’s go chill?”

>She shrugs, taking flight. She heads towards the town. You do your best to keep up.

>You both arrive at Sugarcube Corner. The trip had been fairly quiet.

>Still, none of the ponies you knew were up and around. Strange.

>The store is equally empty. You can see Mr. Cake up front but there are only one or two other ponies in here.

>Slow day, clearly. You walk up to the counter with your bro.

“Hey Mr. Cake. What’s up?”

>He smiles at you, though you notice it’s a bit strained. “Not much. Just... Well, baking.”

“I trust the Pie sisters aren’t giving you any trouble?”

>He laughs uneasily, “No no, of course not.”

>Rainbow laughs, “Its Inkie, isn’t it?”

>He lowers his head in defeat. “Yes.”

“Well as long as you don’t tell Cup Cake I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

 

>”Tell me what, Anon?”

>You all look behind Mr. Cake. Sure enough his wife is standing right behind him with a curious expression.

>”Nothing dear, don’t worry about it.” He shoots you a cold stare.

>”Well anyway, I’m hungry. What are we getting Anon?”

“Some cupcakes sound good. How’s carrot sound?”

>Mr. Cake smiles, “Excellent choice. I’ll fetch ‘em for you.” He trots away.

>Mrs. Cake also smiles, nodding at you before she returns to the kitchen.

>You share a smile with your bro, heading over to a random booth.

>The shop master, Carrot Cake, brings you your cupcakes. You pass him some bits and then dig in.

>Once again, Sugarcube Corner succeeds in creating delicious food. Mmm...

>”This stuff is awesome...” She ‘mmm’s in delight after taking another bite.

“Agreed, Rainbow.”

>”Glad you two like them!”

>You blink, turning to face the newcomer.

“Pinkie Pie? Oh uh... Hey. No problem. I take it you made these?”

>She smiles happily, “Yep!”

>Rainbow Dash chuckles, “Well good job Pinks! You’ve got my vote for best baker in Ponyville for sure!”

>She shakes her head, “Nah, that’s Mr. Cake! I just help out.”

“You aren’t helping out now though.”

>She gives you a serious look, smile gone, “There’s not really a lot to do. In case you hadn’t noticed, business is slow.”

 

>She hops in next to Rainbow Dash, smile returning to her face.

>”So what are you two up to?”

>You shrug. Rainbow Dash mimics your gesture, “Not much Pinkie. Just figured we’d hang out or something.”

>”Well that sounds fun. Guess I’ll hang out too!”

“I guess so. Sure you shouldn’t be in the kitchen though?”

>”Nah they’ll be fine! Inkie and Blinkie are helping out after all!”

>Oh right. You hadn’t thought about it before, but it made sense that they’d be helping here too.

>It’s not like the Cakes would let them loaf around for free, after all.

>You all sit about in silence, chilling as sentient life forms often do.

>Rainbro grunts, “Not a lot to do, huh.”

“Not particularly.”

>”Nope, I guess not.”

“Hm. Well... Pinkie, what’s the plan with your sisters and stuff? Surely your dad won’t just let them sit around here in Ponyville forever...”

>She nods, “We were thinking up a solution for that last night. No ideas yet, sadly.” She sighs.

“Well, maybe Twilight could help?”

>She shakes her head, “Honestly I don’t think spreading the uh... news around is a good idea.”

>Rainbro nods in agreement. “Well, maybe we can ask the ponies who already know?”

 

>Pinkie ‘hm’s, thinking it over.

“Chrysalis is probably not the best choice. Maybe Ditto could think of something?”

>Rainbro smiles, an idea coming to her. “Why not have Ditto turn into like, a normal pony and then have Pinkie’s Dad meet him?”

>Pinkie shakes her head, “He’s already met Ditto though. He’ll know something is up.”

“Especially when he tells him about how he married all three of his daughters without his blessing. That would be messy.”

>”Well fine, let’s go ask Ditto and whoever if they know what to do. It’s better than sitting around here!”

>”What’s wrong with sitting around in Sugarcube Corner? I thought you liked our store...”

>”Huh? I do Pinkie, I just... Ugh! Never mind.”

>Rainbow Dash shakes her head. She jumps up, taking flight. She quickly zooms over to the doorway, glancing back to you before heading outside, likely to your house.

“Guess we better go catch her then?”

>”I guess so. Don’t worry, I have lots of experience with this!”

>She hops out of her seat, galloping off after her friend.

>Great. Running.

 

>She doesn’t get far, luckily.

>Some ten feet from Sugarcube Corner, Rainbow Dash is being yelled at by an angry Bonbon the Destroyer.

>”Honestly Rainbow Dash, can you guys schedule rain on worse days? I mean really, everyone knew for weeks about that TV show coming over to Ponyville yet none of you even tried to reschedule! What’s wrong with you ponies?”

>”Don’t yell at /me/, Bonbon! It’s not my fault! I don’t make the schedules, Cloudsdale does!”

>”Well why didn’t you ask them to change it? Aren’t you in charge of the weather in Ponyville?”

>”Uh no? Just cause I’m the fastest flyer in Equestria doesn’t mean I run Ponyville’s weather patrol.”

>”Ha! Fastest in Equestria. You keep saying that even though it’s false.”

“Bonbon, stop.”

>You walk between the two angry mares that looked ready to fight.

>”Stop? Get out of here, Anon. This doesn’t concern you.”

“Uh, yes it does? Rainbow is my friend. I don’t know what show was in town, but Rainbow wasn’t even here to manage the weather for it so stop bitching.”

>”Excuse me?”

>She glares dangerously at you. You flinch away from her gaze.

>She lets out a frustrated sigh, pushing past you.

>She probably planned to step on your foot, but there’s no way to tell for sure. Fucking Bonbon.

 

>You make your way to your home with your friends.

>Both Pinkie and Rainbro were fairly concerned about your crushed foot, but you assured them it was fine.

>Whether it was or not you weren’t sure. You make a note to stay off the bastard until then.

>Your house is more or less as you left it. Fluttershy hasn’t come by yet, clearly.

>Does she even know you are back in town? You pray she does not.

>You bring Pinkie and Rainbro into your home, bringing them to your living room.

>Ditto, Chrys, Derpy and Dinky are all sitting about watching some TV. My Little Molly once again.

“Hello my little ponies. What’s up?”

>Chrysalis glances at you briefly before refocusing on her show. Typical.

>”Not much Anon! Just watching some cartoons! This show is really funny.”

>At that point Derpy and her daughter begin to laugh at some of the shows antics.

“I see.”

>You walk past them with your two sidekicks, taking up seats all around Ditto.

>You haven’t really sat in your couch in awhile. It feels so foreign. You shake your head; this isn’t what you’re here for.

“So Ditto. As you know, we have a problem. And by we I mean-“

>”Me and you!” Pinkie finishes.

>He nods, “...Yes. I suppose we do.” He glances down at his wedding bracelet.

>Pinkie continues, “Well, you know /I/ don’t really mind it for now and stuff, since if we were going to be a couple we’d probably end up like this anyway. Unless we did one of those weird union things like what deer or gryphons do. Hm, I wonder if ponies are even allow-“

>Rainbow Dash frowns at her friend, “Get on with it Pinkie.”

 

>”Ooh right! Well, the problem is my sisters need to go back to the farm to help out because they work there, but they can’t because we all got married to you and stuff.”

>Derpy sees fit to give her two bits. “Why can’t Ditto just let Inkie and Blinkie go to Stone Falls like nothing happened?”

>Chrysalis yawns, stretching out her neck. “The rings have side effects if you go too far apart.”

>”Oh. What kind of side effects.”

>”Honestly Derpy, I don’t care enough to list them right now. They aren’t fun and that’s all you need to know.”

>Derpy pouts but doesn’t push the issue.

>”Hm. This is worse than I thought...”

“Yes Ditto, it is.”

>Rainbro frowns, thinking. “What could we do...? Maybe we should just tell Clyde the truth?”

>Pinkie shakes her head, actually a bit scared. Rainbro drops the idea immediately at this point.

>Chrysalis sighs, “Clearly you ponies have forgotten who I am.” Her horn lights up...

>Nothing happens right away but the glow keeps up.

“Chrys? What are you doing?”

>At that point a sheet of paper, a quill and some ink float into the room, propelled by Chrysalis’ magic.

>Damn. She grabbed something from a room she couldn’t even see into...

>She writes up a message onto the paper, which then is engulfed in a green flame.

 

“...You could have let us read that you know. What exactly did you do?”

>”I solved your problem. The Pie sisters will stay here in Ponyville while my agents will go to Stone Falls to replace them. It’s foolproof really.”

>Pinkie shakes her head, “Except my Dad has been dealing with changelings for years! He’ll see through it!”

>”I guess we’ll see, won’t we?”

>Pinkie facehoofs, expecting certain doom.

>Well, at least Chrysalis has some sort of plan. You guess you’ll just have to see how it plays out.

>You hope it works though. The last thing you want is Clyde making another leather chair out of Chrysalis.

>Or even worse, you.

>You all sit about for a bit. The episode of My Little Molly ends. Something about dogs is coming on next, but you don’t really care enough to catch the name.

“So... Now what?”

>Rainbow Dash smiles, “Well, we were hanging out if I recall. Let’s go do that again? I’ve got an idea of what we can do too!”

“Lead the way.”

>You get up, following her out. Pinkie plants a kiss onto her husband’s cheek before following suit.

>Chrysalis laughs at Ditto’s embarrassed visage. Clearly she thought his suffering was grade A comedy.

>Sad to say, it actually is.

 

>Rainbow Dash takes you some ways out of town to a clearing.

>She’s taken you to this clearing before, actually.

>This is where she shows off all of her new tricks before she adds them to her usual routine.

>Not that she actually gets to show off her routine much.

>She isn’t exactly a renowned star, despite her claims to fame.

>Regardless you and Pinkie take a seat, watching her show off all the cool tricks she had come up with.

>They are actually pretty impressive. Now if only the Wonderbolts were here to see it.

>She lands in front of you, grinning cheerfully.

>”So how was that? Which do you think are best?”

>”Ooh they were all super duper cool Dashie! You should use all of them!”

“Except that fourth one. That was pretty whack. No offense.”

>She nods, taking in your criticism. You think back to the first time you did that. She was pretty mad.

>Luckily her ego has shrunken just enough to let you comment on her performance.

>”Thanks for the heads up, Anon. I’ll see what I can do.”

>You nod, smiling.

>She would go places, that much you knew.

 

>She continued to show off some of her other tricks, occasionally taking suggestions from Pinkie Pie for awesome things to try.

>You managed to kill a whole hour doing this. It was quite enjoyable.

>You walk with your friends back to Ponyville.

>Pinkie breaks off from your group to return to Sugarcube Corner which she predicts “will need her help for certain by now.”

>You head over to a random pub with Rainbow Dash, figuring you’ll get some food and then head home for the day.

>The food is... alright. You can’t really expect it to be fine dining after all.

>That’s not how Pubs work.

>”Today was sweet, eh Anon?”

“Yeah, it was pretty nice. We should really hang out more often.”

>She nods, taking another bite of her food.

>She looks off out the window. She actually seems a bit... upset?

“Rainbro? Is something bugging you?”

>”Huh? Oh no, no I’m fine. Why do you ask?”

“Just wondering. You seem upset.”

>”Why would I be upset Anon? There’s no reason to be upset.”

>You catch the slightest hint of unhappiness in her voice, but decide to leave it.

>You’ve got food to eat after all.

 

>You trot on back to your home, fairly chilled out.

>Rainbow Dash had left for her home, but you both agreed that you’d go hang out the next day.

>It’s what bros do, after all.

>Your house is, once more, as you left it. Seems Fluttershy hasn’t bothered to come by at all today.

>Or she did, and was scared away by the Changeling Queen or perhaps her commander.

>Either way, your friends are where you left them before; on the couch watching some shows.

>There are two newcomers, however.

>Two changeling mares sat between Ditto and Queen Chrysalis. They wore purplish-black jumpsuits and shades.

“Oh hey guys. You brought the spies?”

>Chrysalis shakes her head, “Do you even pay attention to what I say? These are the replacements for Inkie and Blinkie.”

“Yes Chrys, I know.”

>Derpy gets out of your seat, bowing as you take it.

>You smile awkwardly. You aren’t royalty, so why is she acting like you are.

>She giggles as she spots your confused look before taking up her usual spot in your lap.

 

>The two agents look over to you but say nothing.

“They don’t really seem much like Inkie and Blinkie. How do you expect them to fool Clyde?”

>”They will be spending tomorrow with Inkie and Blinkie to learn how to be them.”

>Oh alright. That seems fine then.

>“And you’ll be making sure they get it right.”

>Wait, what?

“I didn’t agree to that. I have plans tomorrow.”

>”Reschedule. We only have a day before Inkie and Blinkie need to back to Stone Falls so they need to be ready by then.”

>Damnit Chris... How are you going to get out of this mess now?

>”Do not worry Lord Anonymous. We are experts in this; it will not take long.”

>Lord Anonymous? Hm. You could get used to that.

>You nod at the agents who then refocus onto the screen like their Queen.

>What the fuck are you watching anyway?

>Apparantly Chrysalis wanted to know about the mating habits of various avian species.

>You can’t see how it’s such a hard thing to grasp. Girl lays egg, Guy fertilizes, Girl sits on egg, babby is formed.

>You sigh. This would be a long night...

 

>You get up early the next day, heading off to do your morning routine out of the way quickly.

>While you are brushing your teeth, Chrysalis walks in.

>Usually she gets up much later than this. She trots over to you as you brush your eating implements.

>”Good morning, Anonymous.”

>She leans onto the bathroom sinks counter watching you clean. Good thing you were almost done already.

“Uh... Hey Chrysalis. What’s up?”

>She blinks slowly, smiling faintly at you. “I was wondering... We haven’t really done anything together in a while...”

>Where is she going with this?

>”Do you think once you are done with the Pies that we could, oh I don’t know, go do something?”

“...Chrysalis, are you asking me out on a date?”

>”Perhaps.”

>You wait for her to elaborate, but she doesn’t.

“Chrysalis... You know how I feel about ponies...”

>Her horn glows and her form shimmers. You are now looking at not a bug pony...

>...But a human female. “Good thing I don’t have to be a pony then. Wouldn’t you agree?”

“Chrysalis...”

 

>”Come on Anon. I’ll wear that dress Rarity made me and everything. It’d be fun...”

“But I already have plans...”

>She pouts, “But Anon, what will I do here then? You’d leave me all by my lonesome?”

>Damnit Chrysalis, stop this shit...

“Look, we can go out... tomorrow I guess. Now where are those agents of yours? We should get started as soon as possible, don’t you agree?”

>She looks off, disappointed. “Yes, I suppose.”

>There’s a pause.

“By the way, put on some clothes? I’ve got lots of spare shirts and pants in my dressers.”

>You walk past the nude false human, heading downstairs.

>Once you reach the first floor, you glance behind you to see if Chrysalis was ignoring your request.

>For once, she’s not. You catch a glimpse of her entering your room.

>Hurrah! No more naked chicks in your home.

>Well except Derpy and Dinky. And those agents. But their posture isn’t nearly as revealing as Chrysalis’ is when she’s apeing it up.

>You look into your living room, but don’t see the agents anywhere around. Oh well.

>Guess you’ll have some breakfast first.

 

>You bite into a sandwich that you threw together quickly. You would be assisting spies in pretending to be a pair of very unique ponies, so you decide not to cook anything.

>Chrysalis walks downstairs, entering the kitchen. Her outfit is...

>Well, unique to say the least.

“Uh... Hi Chrysalis.”

>You sigh, shaking your head at her failure. “What’s wrong?”

“You have the shirt on backwards and you need a belt with those pants.”

>”I don’t know what you are talking about. These fit just fine.”

>The pants begin to slide off of her hips. She reaches down, pulling them back into place.

“Chrysalis, don’t even try telling me that’s the style. Because it’s not.”

>”Shut up Anonymous.” She gestures with her hands, magically snatching away your sandwich.

“...How did you do that?”

>”Sorry, I can’t talk. Mouth is full.” She takes a bite into your precious. The fiend!

“...You will pay for your crimes against mankind.”

>”Mhm. Okay Anon.”

>You roll your eyes, walking past her to the living room. Still no agents.

>Guess you’ll go get them yourself.

 

>You head down into your basement.

>It has been awhile since you actually went down here. Things have changed, clearly.

>For one, instead of being a boring square of nothing, there’s now, besides the tunnel to Epsilon Hive, a new hallway.

>You enter said Hallway, spotting two doorways near the end of it.

>One has a changeling seal on it, some sort of military symbol. You figure this is Ditto’s room.

>You don’t recall there being another room down here though. Cautiously, you knock onto the second door.

>It opens in short order, revealing one of the agents. “Lord Anonymous?”

“Anon is fine. Also, good morning. Let’s get started?”

>”As you wish my Lord.” She looks into her room, horn aglow.

>She probably prods the other agent with her magic. In short order both are standing before you.

“First things first, we need to go to Sugarcube Corner.”

>”As you wish.”

>You head upstairs, the agents following right behind your every step.

>It feels good to be in charge. However, you still have to make this quick. Rainbow is waiting, after all.

 

>You make your way to Sugarcube Corner, your secret agents right behind.

>Chrysalis had changed to a pair of shorts, which, being comfortable and easy to wear, were less inclined to fall off.

>She seemed quite content in them anyhow. You guess she can have them; you don’t wear shorts much anyhow.

>Now if only you could get her to wear underwear with them... Oh well.

>Right now, you have work to do. You look up at the Sugary confectionary.

>”This is Sugarcube Corner, correct?”

“That’s right. Let’s go say hello?”

>”As you wish.”

>You enter the building quickly. The dead monotone that agent has is beginning to weird you out.

>No one is at the counter this time, so you ring the fancy bell they have. And by fancy you mean ‘basic as possible while still doing its job.’

>Pinkie Pie pokes her head out of the kitchen, smiling as she sees you. She bounces over.

>”Hiya Anon! Who are your new friends?”

“They are Chrysalis’ solution to your problem with Ditto. Where are your sisters?”

>”Hm, I think they are upstairs. Let’s go check!”

>You follow her upstairs, your agents right behind.

 

>Pinkie opens up the door to her room, revealing Blinkie and Inkie who are moping on her bed.

>”Blinkie! Inkie!”

>The pink party pony bounces off over to them, pulling the two into a hug.

>Inkie’s scowl remains in place, but Blinkie cheers up at her sister’s touch.

>”Hi Pinkie. Oh, and hi Anon! What’s up?”

“Not much. Chrys sent these two here to solve your problems.”

>Inkie scoffs as you gesture to the agents. “Is that a fact? What are they going to do, mimic us?”

>”That is correct. We are professional doubles.”

“Check ‘em out. Ladies, if you will?”

>The agents light up their horns, transforming into perfect copies of Inkie and Blinkie Pie.

>Well, except for the expression. Both of them maintain their stoic gazes.

>”Hmph. Not bad I guess. But how exactly do you plan on fooling dad like that? In case you hadn’t notice, you aren’t us.”

>The Inkie agent rolls its eyes, “What makes you sure /you/ aren’t the fakes?”

>”Because I’m not?”

“Before you begin to argue over insignificant things, can I explain what I’m here for?”

>Blinkie smiles, “Sure Anon, go for it.”

 

>You clear your throat before addressing your loyal subjects.

“Well, Chrysalis wants these two here to follow you around and figure out how to act exactly like you.”

>The Pie sisters nod.

“And I’m here to I guess make sure they get everything right. You know like, a 3rd party judge I guess.”

>”I don’t see how /you/ would be good for that...” Inkie jumps off the bed onto the floor. “But fine, I guess.”

>Inkie glares at her doppelganger but says nothing.

>Blinkie joins her sister, looking over her copycat. She seems satisfied with its appearance, unlike her sister.

“I get the feeling we should find somewhere more open for this?”

>Pinkie nods, “Yeah! My room’s designed to fit a maximum of three medium sized ponies. I don’t want to get fined for having too many inside! Let’s go!”

>And so you did. Pinkie took the helm, leading you out of Sugarcube Corner and off to...

>Well, actually, you aren’t sure where. Out of town for sure but...

>...You shake your head. It doesn’t really matter.

>As long as you are done quickly...

 

>Sadly, you were not done quickly.

>Three hours into the session and only Blinkie was happy with her copy. Inkie seemed adamant that she had to be perfect or she may as well not go at all.

>”Honestly, this isn’t going to work. We should just cut off the stupid rings and be done with it.”

>Her copy rolls its eyes. ”You can’t cut the rings off, Inkie. They are enchanted to prevent that.”

>”Why do you even need such security anyway? Are divorces that much of a problem in changeling circles?”

>”...Yes.”

>You groan. They’d been going at for ages now. You for one thought the copy was just fine, but without Inkie’s blessings you were stuck.

>Blinkie splits the two apart for maybe the ninth time. “Girls, come on. Enough.”

>They both turn to her, in perfect unison declaring, also for the ninth time, “Shut up, Blinkie!”

>She shrinks away as usual. “Please girls, let’s be reasonable. There’s no reason to still be doing this.”

>Pinkie nods, “Yeah! We need to get back to Sugarcube Corner!”

“I’m pretty sure you were supposed to be back there hours ago. Lunch breaks aren’t usually this long.”

>”...No, they aren’t. Which is why I’m going back. Good luck Anon!”

“Yeah, thanks.”

 

>The hopeless banter continues for another hour before you decide for Inkie.

“Alright, enough. Inkie, your copy is good enough. Stop bitching and go home.”

>”I’ll bitch as much as I want to, Anon!”

“Then go bitch at Pinkie or something. We’re done here.”

>She rolls her eyes. She turns to her fake, “Have fun failing.”

>”You too, Inkie.”

>Blinkie shakes her head, trotting after her sister. She glances back briefly, silently apologizing.

>You can’t really blame Pinkie for moving out to Ponyville. Living with Inkie must be a royal pain.

>And she’s not even fucking royalty.

>You sigh, beginning the great trek back to your house. You’ll dump these two there then go find Rainbow Dash. You could still probably go to a bar or something, surely.

>On your back home however, you are cut off by a familiar yellow Pegasus.

>Fluttershy. Of course.

>”Anonymous! Hi Anon! I missed you!”

>Before you can even speak she’s all up in your grill. She gives you a fairly painful bearhug. Where’d she get all that muscle mass?

>She looks you in the eyes, blushing deeply, “How was Las Pegasus?”

 

“Fine Fluttershy. Can you get off of me?”

>She lets go of you, using her wings to hover in place.

>She’s still right in your face though, smiling nervously.

>”So Anon, I was wondering. I know I’ve uh... Done mean stuff to you before, but I’ve changed!”

“I’m certain you have Fluttershy, but I ha-“

>”So you’ll go out with me? Oh thank you Anonymous!”

“I did /not/ agree to th-“

>She plants a kiss onto your lips, cutting you off. It doesn’t last long though, as you quickly back off of her.

“Fluttershy, I don’t have time for this shit. Go bother someone else, please.”

>You push past her, heading on your merry way. Unfortunately she’s not done yet.

>She silently flies beside you, watching you intently.

>Eventually your house comes into view. You turn to Yellowquiet angrily.

“Fluttershy, if you aren’t gone by the time I get to my door, I will have Chrysalis/make/ you leave. Go. Away.”

>Her smile wavers. Fluttershy at least had enough sense to avoid purposefully getting herself beaten up.

>Well except that one time she thought you liked injured mares. Ugh.

>You’ll never look at a cast the same way again...

 

>Fluttershy took the hint and left.

>You place a hand on your door, preparing to open it and walk inside. But first.

>You turn to the agents behind you.

“So any reason you didn’t try to help me there?”

>”Not in our jurisdiction.”

“So, you were lazy. Gotcha.”

>You open the door and walk inside. You smell muffins...

>But they don’t smell... right. Something is up.

>You head into your kitchen, the agents heading to your living room instead.

>Your kitchen is a mess, clearly. Chrysalis has a pan of ‘muffins’ on the counter, cooling.

>”Anon? Oh hello Anon. How did it go?”

>She leans onto the counter, making a ‘sexy’ pose. It doesn’t work, as her elbow collides with the hot pan.

>She yells out in pain, grabbing the injured section of her arm.

>”Damn these arms... I’ll never get used to this form...”

“You’ve been like this all day? Really?”

>”Of course. We’re going out later tonight; I need to be in good form after all.”

>She strolls over to you, placing a hand on your chest.

>You roll your eyes at her antics. She just giggles at your dismay.

>Fucking changeling queens...

 

“Chrysalis, I need to go find Rainbow Dash. We can hang out later.”

>She smiles devilishly, her eyes glowing a greenish color.

>Before you can respond, her form shimmers, transforming her into of course, Rainbow Dash.

>The clothes she was wearing disappears with her magic. Someone clearly owes you a new shirt.

>”Here I am Anon! Let’s go hang out!”

“No Chrysalis, not you pretending to be Rainbow Dash. The actual, legitimate, wants-to-be-a-Wonderbolt Rainbow Dash.”

>She sighs, turning back into her usual form. She hovers up her outfit, dumping it onto her back.

>”Fine. Go hang out with your ‘bro.’ I’ll just wait here, all alone.”

>Someone sure seems keen on guilt tripping. Too bad.

“The agents are in the living room. Chat them up?”

>She grunts, trotting off to speak with her agents.

>Now then. Time to find Rainbow Dash!

>But first, since Chrysalis went through all the trouble of making them, you have a muffin.

>It’s alright, you suppose. Derpy’s are much better, though.

>You finish up the muffin and quickly head out.

>You glance about the sky outside your home. There are no signs of comfy clouds for your bro to sleep in. Hm.

>This might take awhile...

 

>You end up wandering throughout Ponyville and the surrounding areas for well over an hour.

>You checked with all of Rainbow’s friends, at Rainbow’s house, where Rainbow does flying tricks...

>You even asked Thunderlane and some other weather patrollers if they had seen her.

>’Not since this morning’ was the usual answer. Hm.

>You had even risked asking Applejack, but she was more interested in trying to get you to come home with her to Sweet Apple Acres. Safe to say, you said no.

>You were now checking in more or less all the restaurants and other stores around town.

>However there’s no sign of the Rainbow maned mare anywhere.

>As the sun begins to set you move down to random bars. There are only a few in Ponyville, luckily.

>If she’s getting hammered, she’ll be somewhere around here.

>The first few bars prove futile. Sighing, you walk into Ponyville’s last, and worst, bar.

>You take a look around. This place tends to never be full.

>And it’s not. There’s maybe four or so ponies here, probably for nostalgia’s sake rather than the quality of the drinks.

>And of these four is Rainbow Dash herself.

 

>You slowly approach the mare.

>You can tell from her posture alone that she’s been drinking a lot.

>You don’t even have to look at the many empty bottles beside her.

>You take a seat beside her. She’s just sitting there, head on the counter.

>Cautiously, you prod her. She stirs, looking over to you.

>Her eyes are a deep red. She seems surprised at first when she sees you, but then she gets angry.

>”Anon? Where the fuck were you?”

“Sorry about this, Chrysalis had me doing stupid shit all day.”

>She rolls her eyes, “Oh yeah I’m sure. Always doing stuff for your little queen...”

“Well, uh... I suppose you don’t want to do anything right now?”

>”Nah I’m /great./ You go hang out with your precious queen. I’ll be here. All alone.”

>You smile uneasily at her. She just snorts. “Well? Why are you still here?”

“Rainbro look... I’m sorry about this crap, but things happen. We can hang out tomorrow or som-“

>”No thanks, I’ll pass.”

>You blink, not expecting her response. Usually she’s fine with rescheduling.

>Perhaps the alcohol is messing with her?

“Rainbro? Come on, that’s just the booze talking. We can go see-“

 

>You’re cut off when the angry drunken Rainbro punches you in the gut.

>Safe to say, that shit fucking hurts. Damned hooves...

>”Stop calling me Rainbro! My name is Rainbow! Rainbow Dash!”

>At this point the other ponies in the bar are all looking over at you.

“Rainbow... You’ve definitely had too much to drink. I’ll let you uh... chill and then we can take tomorrow.”

>”Yeah whatever. You go back to fucking your stupid changeling queen. See if I care!”

>You shake your head at her antics. Now she’s just being silly.

>You get up out of your seat, heading for the door. [spoiler][/spoiler]”Good night, Rainbow Dash.”

>You are stopped by a tug on your arm. You turn to spotting Rainbow Dash flying behind you.

“Rainbow Dash what the fuck are you doing?”

>”Please Anon! Don’t leave me! I need you! You need me!”

“Rainbow Dash, get a hold of yourself!”

>You pull your arm away from her. She actually looks really sad.

>”...I thought we were bros Anon...”

“We are bros, Rainbow...”

>”No Anon, we’re not! Ever since fucking Chrysalis showed up...” She mumbles out something.

“...Rainbow?”

>”Everything has changed Anon! Everything! It’s not fair!”

 

>She lands on the ground, looking away from you.

>She actually seems on the verge of tears. You’ve never seen her so... upset.

>You reach down to her, trying to comfort your friend. She swats away your hand.

>”Don’t touch me! Leave me alone!”

>She rushes away in a gallop. You reach out for her, but she’s already gone.

>You stand there in shock, unable to figure out what to do.

>You figured Rainbow Dash would be upset with you, but not this upset.

>You head out of the bar, ignoring the murmurs of discussion from the bar’s other customers.

>You look all about the darkened sky, but there isn’t any sign of her.

>You sigh. Clearly you’d need to talk to her another time.

>While she’s drunk there’d be no hope of negotiations. Yes, better try tomorrow.

>Defeated, you head back home.

>You’ll head over to her house first thing and talk it out.

>Yes. That is exactly what you’ll do.

>As you arrive home you pass by the living room, instead heading upstairs.

>You take a nice, cold, shower then head to sleep.

>Safe to say, it doesn’t come easily.