Title: LNPP from thread 123 (the Truth and Buck Norris) Author: Asian_Anon Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/rV9jSh6p First Edit: Thursday 1st of September 2016 11:44:54 PM CDT Last Edit: Thursday 1st of September 2016 11:44:54 PM CDT 631_______________________________________________________________________________________ Non-Canon >Pinkie "Cadence" 'DT' [Luna] ~~~~ >Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content does matter, but my writer is feeling a little better!   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imamcajBEJs [The dream is collapsing.] In the background, multiple dragons rush through the streets and fill the skies. They burn and smash everything in their way. Buildings collapse. Shadows, night guards and Dream Eaters alike flee. Tall skyscrapers that were previously normal, morph and crumple into giant dragons. Houses become jagged teeth. The ground shakes and cracks as random giant gems jut out from below. A 3 story tall dragon from the sky lands on the ground creating a crater in front of Luna and the Pinks. It roars fiercely at them, before launching a fireball from it's mouth.   [LUNAR SLASH!] Luna slices the the fireball in half with a sword and it explodes either side of her. [LUNAR CROSS SLASH!] She slashes vertically and horizontally in a cross on the dragon's chest. It glows brightly before the dragon explodes in pillar of light.   [...would you stop playing that?]   DT turns off the music and puts TBDRLIATU away. 'Sorry, Pinkie told me to put in background music.'   A group of Smaller baby dragons run up to them and wave hi. "Oh, these ones look like a skinnier version of Spike." They jump and start biting the Pinks. >"'Ow ow ow ow ow!'"   >Stop, drop, roll! STOP, DROP, ROLL!   [LUNAR MARBLES!] A number of moonlike marbles float up and fire into the baby dragons at bullet speed, dispatching them all at once. [Obviously, we're being perceived as invaders.] Luna opens a door. [Leave. I'm going to stay here and make sure the giant Dream Eater is put down.] The biggest dragon bites the head off of the giant Dream Eater. [...Never mind.] She shoves them all through the door and shuts it behind her. Somewhere in a cave, an elder dragon wakes up.   {...Ugh why is it so hard for a drigga to get some sleep these days?}   632_______________________________________________________________________________________ Non-Canon >Pinkie "Cadence" 'DT' [Luna] ~~~~ >Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content does matter, but I like being abrupt and interrupting!   "That uh...that was that I guess."   'That's not fair! We fought hard and took down a bunch of Dream Eaters. Even saved an old couple.'   [It was a valiant effort, but some nights are just a lost. However, we believe this was an act of desperation. Their hunger is pushing them to become more and more reckless to come in at that many numbers. While we may have lost that dream city, but we are sure he'll have to fall back asleep eventually. Unless there have been dragons dying left and right, folks will have to take up residence in another dream city...hmmm, which reminds me that there have been an unusual number of dream city dragon hosts gone missing lately.]   >That doesn't sound so bad. Folks can rebuild. Do the dragons ever interact with ponies?   [They usually seem indifferent about hosting the cities, so typically no, but when they do take action, it often results in the lost of the entire dream city.]   >What happens now?   [Continue on guarding the night. There are still nightmares to protect our citizens from. Thank you for answering the call, P-Team. Until you are needed again, farewell.] Luna opens up a door and leaves.   "...yep."   '...yip.'   >...mhmm.   "...Pinkie, we're friends right?"   >Of course!   'and you know friends would be concerned if something bad was happening to a friend right?'   >Uh duh?   "Pinkie...what black eyes you have."   >...what are you talking about?   'Pinkie...what sharp teeth you had.'   >...oh. You're talking about that.   'Are you going to tell us what's going on?'   >...fine.   Life in the Pink Pony Club~   633_______________________________________________________________________________________ Non-Canon >Pinkie "Cadence" 'DT' ~~~~ >Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content does matter, but a mare's gotta do what a mare's gotta do! Now for our main segment...THE PINK PONY CLUB!   Life in the dreamhouse~ They're all gathered in the living room of Pinkie's Dreamhouse. Cadence takes a sip of her tea.   "...sooo you put cardboard Pinkie in a ball...and ate her?"   '...she's also giving you an insatiable hunger to eat nightmares...like the Dream Eaters.'   >Yup.   "...I think we should ask Auntie Luna what to do in this situation."   >No, don't bring her into this!   'Pinkie, it can't be good to have that bitch gnawing at you from the inside.'   "Can you at least talk to Auntie Luna about it? Just be smooth and ask her a question on the show."   >Neeeeh I don't want to.   'Stop being such a kid. Why not?'   >What if she wants shatter my mind?   "You're overreacting."   >I'm not. Remember how she planned to fix Rarity. She was going to break her mind and put it back together. That sounds really not safe.   '...she kind of has a point. It really doesn't.'   "...um you should ask her what happens when you eat your own shadow anyway...just hypothetically."   '...are you binge eating your house?'   Pinkie's eating a chocolate column. >...I made my house an edible gingerbread house for a reason. It's too delicious not to do this. Plus it helps keeps the hunger in check.   "Pinkie, I know we're not as close friends as the elements of harmony, but we really are worried about you."   'What she said. What we do here is just a dream, but what we experienced together is real enough, so...can you please talk to Princess Luna?'   >...what if she loses respect for me afterward?   'That's okay. She probably never had respect for you in the first place.' Cadence smacks the back of DT's head. 'Ow.'   "We'll cross that bridge when it happens...together."   >...thank you.   They join hooves >"'To the Pink Pony Club!'"   634_______________________________________________________________________________________ Non-Canon >Pinkie "Cadence" 'DT' [Luna] ~~~~ >Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content does matter, but Nyquil can really put you to sleep! Now for our main guest...PRINCESS LUNA!   [Salutations everypony.]   >Hypothetical question. What would happen if you were to eat your own shadow?   [Ahahaha, what would make you ask such a question?]   >Uh just wondering is all.   [It's typically not the first thing that ponies would do, but we'd have to deal with you the same way we did with Buck Norris.]   >...wait what?   [Sadly that's all the time we have now, so we must go, but I had a pleasant time.] Leaves through a door. Cadence and DT poke their heads in.   'What did she do to Buck Norris?'   "...we should ask her again?"