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DarkJester
#500754
10 months ago
"Twilight! Twilight!"
Pinkie Pie burst into the library, where Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy were laying down reading books together.
"Twilight, what's a 'penis'?"
She blinked, taken aback. She had never come across such a term in her studies. "Um... a what now? Where did you hear this word?"
"WELL, I was out by the Carousel Boutique and saw the MAYOR with one of the royal guards!" Pinkie Pie pranced over to Fluttershy, suddenly straddling the bewildered pony's rump. "...and he was on top of her like this, bumping his hips into her hind quarters like this!"
She imitated the motion vigorously. "EEP!" Fluttershy scrambled out from under the thrusting pink pony. "...and she kept saying stuff like--" then in a ridiculous mock impression "--'Oh, YES! Drive that penis DEEP inside me!'"
Twilight Sparkle was absolutely flustered. She scowled, thinking for a moment. "'Inside me?' I... have no idea. But moreover, what were they DOING? Was he hurting her?"
"Oh no, no! The mayor sounded REALLY happy to have him bumping her!" Pinkie Pie chirped.
"Um..." Fluttershy whispered, "I think I know... well, maybe..." She trailed off.
Pinkie and Twilight both turned their attentions to her. "You do??"
"Well..." She hid behind her hair a little more, "it sounds like what I see the bunnies doing sometimes... You see, some of them um, climb on top of others and move how you were showing, Pinkie Pie... And... I sometimes see a little pink thing between their legs dripping drops of cream from the tip--"
"Oo! oo! Yes, I saw that too!" Pinkie Pie cut in, "I mean, I didn't see a pink thingy, but cream was dripping onto the ground beneath them! Only it was WAAAY more than a drop!"
This mystery was beginning to bother Twilight, who had suddenly remembered an encounter with her parents when she was younger. The description of the mayor and the royal guard sounded very similar to what she had seen, which her parents had been quick to dismiss and change the subject. And then there was that rod between her dad's legs, and the way her mom was dripping...
"Um, Twilight? Why are you blushing?" Pinkie Pie chimed in.
Twilight snapped out of her brief trance. "It's nothing!" She turned to a bookcase, her unicorn horn glowing as she levitated an encyclopedia over, dropping it open in front of her, "I just... need to figure this out!"
"If you don't know maybe we can just ask the mayor!"
"No, Pinkie Pie, she'll just change the subject, trust me. I'm figuring this out!"
She flipped through the pages for a while. Nothing. "Ugh!" Desperate, she levitated over a spell book. "No... no... no... hmm..." She stopped on a page as the other two ponies crowded in to look.
"A controlling vine spell?" Pinkie Pie asked quizically. "What does that have to do with finding out what a penis is?"
"It may not be the exact thing, but I have an idea of how it works I think..." She scoured over the page some more. "Well, it's not pink, but it should do... and I can conjure some cream to appear at the tips as well."
The pony stood up, closing her eyes as both the book and her magical horn began to glow, a bevy of vines from the walls outside sliding in through the open window.
Kaboodles
#500767
10 months ago
.... I don't even.
Kaboodles
#500768
10 months ago
I don't even.
Anonymous
#500798
10 months ago
I even, but i wish I didn't.
Anonymous
#500808
10 months ago
I've seen enough hentai to know where thi is go...oh, too late
Anonymous
#500813
10 months ago
bueno
YoyoTripleThree
#500821
10 months ago
Damn you, DarkJester! You made me laugh... but that doesn't make it right!
Bongo
#500832
10 months ago
I guess you could say she had some wild oats to sew.
Atiarotias
#500848
10 months ago
I read that up there. The whole thing. I've read it.
Drax99
#500950
10 months ago
I almost laughed, till I get to the part where Pinkie Chirps. I am most of the way through Past Sins, and every time I see it I am like "WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THE CHIRPING PONIES?" The author uses it at least 5 times per chapter.

Seriously, ponies arn't birds, they don't chirp.
Anonymous
#500956
10 months ago
Although I'm not really into tentacle stuff, I'm actually pretty impressed with how canon the characters look. I wonder what else this gut does? *Searches Internet, Finds droves of quasi-realistic anthro scat porn* JESUS FUCK. Okay, yeah, not interested in the rest of his work.
Anonymous
#501272
10 months ago
To artist:
Too far man, too far.
Kooner
#501362
10 months ago
Not bad ... not bad at all.
Anonymous
#501379
10 months ago
>#500832

BA DUM TSHHHHHHHHHHH
BK_Leonidas
#502137
10 months ago
@Darkjester tl;dr
Anonymous
#512160
10 months ago
@Drax99
It's Pinkie Pie! She can do ANYTHING!
Anonymous
#549353
9 months ago
>#500754
whatthefuckamireading.jpg