Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/1141375. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Homestuck Relationship: Ambiguous_or_Implied_Relationship(s), John_Egbert/Dave_Strider Character: Dave_Strider, John_Egbert Additional Tags: Established_Relationship, Masturbation, Chubby_John, Awkward_Boners, Tickling Series: Part 1 of Adventures_of_Chubbert_and_Dave Stats: Published: 2014-01-18 Words: 1156 ****** i'm laughing but my dick is still hard ****** by historiCthrenody_(Cookieluv246) Summary In which Dave just really really likes how soft John is and just wants to fuck his cute butt. But John is too precious to fuck so he'll wait. It won't stop him from fantasizing though. Notes See the end of the work for notes Click. Ok, chill. Everything's chill. No more shrill giggling, or impish boys with dumb buckteeth, or squirming cute boys underneath you heaving and panting and-- and-- Splash. Cool it Dave, ok, it's just you and your boner now. John none the wiser, it's fine, all fine. You gulp as you wipe your face of the water dribbling down your chin. It's really not fair you have such a hot boyfriend. It's really not fair, and it's absolutely not fair what he does to you.  Ok, so you guys only recently got together, a couple months and going strong, but Egbert barely lets you kiss him without going all dopey and blushy and fuck. You haven't been dating long enough to be wanting to do the things you've been wanting to do. You feel really skeevy about it to be honest, you doubt he even thinks that far ahead,honestly, but your dick is like the star student of the class as it's the first to respond to every annoying thing John ever does.  You just wanted to tease him a little, he was wide open and vulnerable and what would a little tickling do? But you didn't consider it would end with you almost rutting against your boyfriend of four month's stomach as he whined underneath you and-- Breath. Ok, it's no big deal, it's no big deal, you got yourself out of there in time, you're in the clear. But the images don't leave, like a horror video recording it just stays in loop in your head. The way he arched his back, and his stomach rose and fell and the way he'd push his chest up, you were almost sure you saw a nipple, almost positive. He was always so soft and so round, and his ass would always twitch if you touched him on the right spot, and you wanted to make it red and wobble, you swear Egbert had the perfect ass, the perfect body, the perfect everything it was so not cool. You wanted to shove your dick on every meaty part of his body and feel his soft skin caressing your hard dribbling cock, his pouty lips pressed around your cock, his ass rubbing against your dick as you teased him, fucking his thick thighs as you bent him over and watched everything move like god damn jello and FUCK you were fucked up. Your head was to the wall as you shamefully gripped at your crotch, rolling your hips and biting your hand as you thought of the way it would look if you slapped that ass naked and open, if he would roll his stomach in low consecutive movements or if he'd be panting like earlier and if he would be stained with sweat or your jizz or both, or if he would get off on himself as his cock would betray him, and he'd be covered and you would watch the way it would drip down his crotch and thigh and FUCK FUCK. Drip. You felt frozen and nearly suffocating as you shivered. Your hand was bleeding with the way you were biting it, but it was ok, it was all ok, you couldn't give any less of a shit as you were on the floor gripping your balls. You were scared he would hear you, or Mr. Egbert, or whoever the fuck but you couldn't care. Your eyes were shot and you must have looked like a desperate wreck but you couldn't be shitted. "John..." You let out a low breath and were nearly humping the floor as you rocked, the throbs julting you and pushing your every movement and you needed more, so much more. You needed him to spread his legs for you, and scratching those nails down your back as you fucked him so hard his GRANDMA could feel it. Your jeans were soaked in the front and they were tight already but they were tighter now and the way it chafed was painful but so good as you laughed between whimpers, backing yourself into a corner as your head hit the wall.  You were close, you were really close, fuck you needed to get out of your pants before this got messy. You fumbled with your front, popping the button with a surprising amount of ease as you tried to be careful with the zipper, but also fuck the zipper cause this is frustrating you immensely. "Dave?" SHIT. Play it cool Dave, play it cool. It's just John you're lovely considerate boyfriend who is more then most likely worried cause you're taking FOREVER IN THE FUCKING BATHROOM. You can't say anything though, you know your voice will betray you, so this time he knocks and calls your name with a bit more concern. "Dave? You alright in there?" "FINE." You let out a loud groan, hell yes sweet release. Pants shimmying down your legs and God you're a horrible person, trying to still get off with John literally a door away. But your hand is slow and careful as your breathing stays shallow. "Are you ok? Do you need anything?" You could think of a couple things you need, his ass to be bouncing on your dick, that's one thing. Hell even him just giving you a strip show or posing or something would be hella tight, so tight, just fuck you hear yourself babbling and you need to stop he's right fucking there, you hear yourself babbling AND YOU NEED TO STOP HE'S RIGHT FUCKING THERE. "Dave?" "No." "Oh, ok. Well I'm right outside, so just holler if you need anything." "YeAh--" You clench your teeth, your voice was slipping and hopefully he wouldn't notice. But as you heard footsteps tapping away, you let out a large exhale as you go in to full speed. Twisting your wrist at every which way, rutting and bouncing in your spot and you're there, right there, jegus Christ fuck yes, fuck fuck FUCK-- Squeak. "Hm?" You're too busy in a happy daze to be bothered by the fact that you literally just squeaked, Dave fucking Strider does not squeak like a God damn little mouse, but here we are kids. Bow legs, dud's eschew, drool dripping down your mouth as you let out a noise associated to the weakest links of nature. But you still can't give a fuck, cause you were so backed up and this was really fucking good considering. "Did you say something?" "Nah." You're grin ever present, you were on cloud nine, ten, eleven, twelve, life was pretty swell and you think you might sleep on that floor, but you force yourself up and ugh. Even without your pants you still made a horrible mess. You really needed a shower now. And a new pair of underwear, ergh.  Maybe next time John will be the one to clean it up. Fuck you didn't plan for a round two. End Notes I'm such a fucking liar, I said I would never do Dave's POV ever again and here we are. Man I don't even know how to explain this, I can't justify shit. I don't even know if fatjohns my kink bUT HERE I PRESENT IT. There's another fic on the way too but this one was actually written second?? I just wrote this faster???? Whatever I make no sense. asdfgjkl; I hope you enjoy it. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!