Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/9196496. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Rape/Non-Con, Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Persona_4 Relationship: Adachi_Tohru/Narukami_Yu Character: Adachi_Tohru, Narukami_Yu Additional Tags: Unrequited_Crush, Semi-Public_Sex, Blow_Jobs, Dubiously_Consensual_Blow Jobs, Extremely_Dubious_Consent, Accomplice_Yu, POV_Second_Person, Implied_Sadism, Emotional_Manipulation, P4G_Continuity, Movie_Theater Sex, Age_Difference Stats: Published: 2017-01-04 Words: 2656 ****** bad decisions ****** by apricots Summary "A movie? Haha, that sounds like a date." You open your eyes; Adachi still has not peeled himself off the wall. He's just looking at you, wry and amused. "It's not a date. That would be weird," you say, because that's what you're supposed to say, though the words feel heavy and clumsy in your mouth. You're not good at lying. You never have been. "I just thought it might be the kind of thing you would enjoy." Notes title is the ariana grande song bc she sings yu narukami's life When you step through the doors to Junes, a stiff air-conditioned wind buffets your clothes and hair. Yosuke is here today, staring intensely at his phone, gnawing on his lower lip. You take a step toward him, then see something in your peripheral vision. You stop. It seems that Adachi has some free time today. He's lounging against the wall, staring out the window with a far-away look in his eyes. You pivot on your heel and march towards him instead. You can talk to Yosuke any time; he'll be free tomorrow, too, probably. You politely pretend you don't hear Yosuke saying, "Oh, hey, partner, you wanna hang out?" Adachi seems to not notice you, at first. He must be lost in thought. You stand in front of him, fidgeting, not sure if it would be too much to touch him to get his attention. You can tell that you're about to become closer, though. It's that kind of day. ......... Eventually, you clear your throat and say, "Adachi-san?" That makes him look at you, eyes half-lidded. It takes him a moment to react, like it always does; he is always sort of tired and sort of not quite present. "Well, howdy," he says. He says it like it's a joke; as though he's only saying hello ironically. You ball your hands into fists at your sides so you'll stop fidgeting. This... will take quite a bit of Courage. You take a deep breath and, nervously, bow slightly with your eyes squeezed shut. "Adachi-san, would you like to go to a movie with me in Okina City?" you ask. You ask this all in one rapid tumbling breath, so it comes out as one babble word; adachisanwouldyouliketogotoamoviewithmeinokinacity.There's barely even a rise at the end to indicate that it's a question. Your cheeks are burning hot. Your Expression has increased. "A movie? Haha, that sounds like a date." You open your eyes; Adachi still has not peeled himself off the wall. He's just looking at you, wry and amused. "It's not a date. That would be weird," you say, because that's what you're supposed to say, though the words feel heavy and clumsy in your mouth. You're not good at lying. You never have been. "I just thought it might be the kind of thing you would enjoy." You wait, counting to ten in your head, while Adachi looks at you. Stay calm and count to ten before you say anything else; that's what you read online, about getting nervous around people you like. Don't babble. One. He's probably just trying to think about how much time he has to spare. Two. It's not that he doesn't like you. Three. You know that Adachi enjoys spending time with you. Four. You don't usually go anywhere or do anything with him, but maybe it would be a nice change. Five. It's unlikely that this would make him mad. Six. Especially since you specifically said it wasn't a date. Seven. He can't get mad if you tell him it's not a date, right? Eight. Maybe he's embarrassed, too! Nine. If he says no, that's fine, you can just hang out at Junes like you always do, it's not a big deal. Ten. "Sure," Adachi says. "Let's go." As you walk out of Junes, you trip over one of Adachi's feet and nearly faceplant on the concrete. You catch yourself before you hit your face on the ground, though, and hop back upright with just your palms a bit scraped up. Adachi laughs. "Careful," he says. You smile at him. You can sense he really cares about you.   "If this were a date, you'd buy my ticket for me," Adachi says idly. You buy his ticket for him. He gets the popcorn. The movie is a horror movie- - a slasher, not quite Yukiko's thing, about a bunch of sorority girls being stalked by a madman in a mask. None of your friends wanted to see it. You don't really want to see it, either, but you have a feeling it'll make you a bit braver. Also, it's the only thing playing right now. Adachi sprawls in the seat next to you, one arm draped casually over the back of your chair. You're not sure what it means. In movies, people do that on dates. Is this a date after all? You try to stay very very still; you're afraid if you move, he'll take his arm away. Even though you really want to lean back and rest your head against his arm, you have to not do that. You don't know who any of the people in the movie are. You're too busy staring at the seat back in front of you and trying really hard not to move. So when the slasher first arrives, accompanied by a preposterously loud scare chord, you actually yelp and jump really hard, slamming your back against the back of your seat. Your head hits Adachi's arm. He laughs. "That was so high-pitched," he says. You whisper, "Sorry." "In the dark, you could be a girl." You pause, cheeks flushing. You're not sure it's a compliment, but it kind of sounds like one. "It's dark right now," you say softly. Adachi tilts his head back, keeping his eyes on the movie. "Yeah," he says. He flicks his tongue out over his lips; your eyes catch on his mouth. There's a crooked smile playing over his soft lips. "If I was a girl," you say, "This would be a date, right?" Adachi shrugs, and his smile widens. "What else would it be? A guy and a girl alone at the movies, sitting next to each other? Sure sounds like a date." You clear your throat and shift, cheeks too warm. "If... if I was a girl, and this was a date..." you say, then stop and stare at your hands. You're not a girl, and this isn't a date. One of the girls onscreen screams as she gets stabbed. You wince. Adachi blinks, slowly, smile unflinching. "What... what kind of girl would you go on a date with?" you ask. That sounds like guy talk, right? Yosuke asks you that pretty much once a week. "The kind of girl who puts out, I guess," Adachi says, and pops a bit of popcorn into his mouth. "I mean, 's pointless otherwise, right?" "Right," you say feebly. You can tell that Adachi hasn't been on a date in a while. It seems like he's sort of frustrated. You rub your thumb against your palm, staring at the seat in front of you again. You can feel your heart pounding in your throat. You smile weakly and try for humor. "Sorry I'm not a girl." "Well," Adachi eats some more popcorn and curls his long fingers against his lips. "It's dark. I can pretend."  It is dark. Your palms are sweating. Would Adachi like you if you were a girl? You close your eyes and think about Yu-chan, the yanki girl, with a braid and a long skirt and a bokken over her shoulder. Is she the kind of girl who puts out? ...You get up, mumble something about getting a soda, and walk out. Adachi's arm leaves phantom warmth lingering on the back of your neck. You walk quickly to the bathroom and yank your phone out of your pocket. Rise knows about this sort of thing. She'll know what to do. You text her. when you go to the movies with someone and he (You delete the "he" and change it to "she." You can't be too careful with these things.) when you go to the movies with someone and she says it's not a date but you r sharing popcorn is it a date?????? Rise texts back immediately: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn’t know u liked the tsundere type  owo You inhale sharply and tap out another text as quickly as you can. Should I make a move?? I don't want to be too bold... And, again, almost immediately: do it!! girls like assertive guys... the worst that can happen is she says no, right? You nod, flip your phone shut, and clutch it to your chest. The worst that can happen is he says no. Good thing you have a lot of Courage. When you go back to your seat, instead of sitting down, you instead kneel on the floor in front of Adachi. The floor of the theater is hard and sticky... it's gross. Adachi does not look down at you. He doesn't seem to register your presence, even when you slide your hands up his thin legs. You lean over and undo his belt, fingers shaking a little bit. He shifts forward in his seat slightly, which makes unzipping his pants easier. He doesn't ask what you're doing. He doesn't look at you. It's probably easier to pretend you're a girl that way. He is hard already-- that's encouraging. You sort of freeze for a second, staring at the bulge of his erection in his underwear. Are you really doing this? ...Yes. Fortune favors the bold, right? You tug Adachi's underwear down and wrap your hand around his cock. You've seen this in porn before, but it feels a lot more nervewracking in person. You look at his face to try to see any sign of hesitation, anger, whatever-- nothing. He is watching the movie like you're not even there. You press onward, and take the head of his cock into your mouth. Adachi makes a very faint noise: a soft grunt in the back of his throat, cut off. You feel emboldened. If he likes it, then it should be fine. You can do this. How hard can it be? You press your tongue against his dick and take a little more into your mouth. It's bigger in relation to your mouth than you thought it would be. You can't fit much in there; dramatically less than you thought you'd be able to. This is... a logistical issue. You try to go lower, but the head of his cock hits the back of your throat and you gag a little bit. Nope. Not happening. Perhaps you should have practiced. Now what? --!! Very suddenly, Adachi grabs a fistful of your hair and thrusts his hips into your mouth, mashing your face into his lap. His dick actually goes into your throat. You gag and choke; you can't breathe, and your throat seizes up, and your stomach heaves. He holds you there and doesn't let you move when you try to jerk away. Adachi is stronger than he looks. Panic seizes you for a moment. You might die, you think deliriously. This is the worst way to die you can imagine. You don't want to hurt Adachi, so you don't want to forcibly shove off of him, but you might have to. You give him a pleading look. Adachi is not looking at you. But... He's biting down on his lower lip, his face is flushed, and his eyes are unfocused. He's enjoying this, after all. You can't stop, then. This is what you wanted. You have to just stop choking. You huff in breaths through your nose and use the power of your iron will to stop yourself from puking on Adachi's dick. This involves digging your fingernails into your legs and a fair amount of trembling, but you manage to get yourself together enough to stop choking. You feel the veins in Adachi's cock throb on your tongue. Adachi curls his fingers in your hair, knuckles brushing against your scalp, and he pulls your head back slightly before thrusting in again. You gag again, looking desperately up at him to try and signal with your eyes for him to stop please, but he doesn't pay you any mind. Adachi fucks your mouth in rough shallow movements, and you do your best to work your throat and mouth and tongue around him as he does so. Your mouth is full of spit; his cock is slick and wet in no time, and saliva dribbles out of your mouth and down your chin. Your gagging and slurping feels agonizingly loud. Someone might hear. Your pulse is pounding; Adachi's is, too, though he betrays none of the anxiety you're feeling. If Adachi isn't worried, maybe you don't need to be...? You can hear, behind you, the unpleasant sound of another girl getting murdered; piercing screams, shrill violins, the thin wet sounds of a knife slicing flesh. A hoarse moan spills from Adachi's lips, mostly drowned in the cacophony from the movie but still sounding too painfully audible. What if someone calls the police on you? What if Dojima finds out? This is a small town-- everyone and their grandmother would know in about two days. What then? Would Adachi get fired? You'd be on TV, maybe, and you wouldn't be able to keep it a secret from your mom, and... it would spiral out of control. It would be a total nightmare. Adachi's hands in your hair are firm and long-fingered. His fingernails are a little long, just barely long enough to scratch you. It feels good. Comforting, almost. It feels like he'll keep you safe.  He wouldn't let things get that bad. It'd be terrible for the both of you. That thought anchors you enough that you can enjoy it. You'll be fine. Adachi will protect you. He wants you-- at least right now, he wants you enough to take you. You look up at his face again and can't hold back a feeble moan. He's flushed, his lips parted, and it's because of you. That comes to you in a rush of full-body warmth. Adachi-san wants me. Your hips arch up unbidden. You're too hard, suddenly, feeling a desire more intense than just about anything else you've ever felt. This is everything you wanted, and it's a little too much for you. You shove your hand down the front of your pants, sucking at Adachi's cock with a newfound hunger. "Oh," Adachi groans, hips shuddering, grip on your hair tightening. You fumble with your own cock, out of breath and desperate and wishing he was touching you more. It's embarrassing, losing yourself like this, reduced to a whimpering too-eager mess, clinging to his leg with one hand and jacking off with the other. When he finishes, he pulls your head off slowly. The taste is bitter and unpleasant and you choke on it, gagging again, but when his cock's out of your mouth you press your hand over your wet lips and swallow. You don't want to spit it out; you feel weirdly compelled, like it's very important. Looking at his face is too much; you feel too dizzy, too overwhelmed with how real and unreal this is. Adachi's grip on your hair softens. He smooths his hands over your head, like you're a cat, curling his hands down to swipe his thumbs over your burning ears. You bury your face in his palm, breathing hard, too flushed and too dizzy. You don't say his name, you don't dare, but you make a huffing hoarse noise into his hand as you jerk to a stuttery finish in your hand. Tohru Adachi's Social Link Arcana has changed from The Jesterto Hunger. After that, you sit back in your seat next to him. The rest of the movie passes in a dizzy blur... you don't remember anything at all about it. You decide to look up a summary online, in case anyone asks you about it. In the hallway, Adachi checks his watch and his eyes go wide, eyebrows shooting up. "Oh, sh-- uh, oh, geez! I'd better run to make the next train, I totally forgot I had a thing I needed to get to! See you around, kid." ...He leaves. You realize, standing in the lobby of the movie theater, that you're trembling.  Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!