Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/6778906. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Choose_Not_To_Use_Archive_Warnings, Underage Category: F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other Fandom: Snowpiercer_(2013) Relationship: Curtis_Everett/OMC, Curtis_Everett/Random_Male_Characters, Curtis_Everett &_Edgar, Curtis_Everett_&_Grey, Grey_&_Edgar, Grey/Wilford/Gilliam, Wilford/Gilliam Character: Curtis_Everett, Edgar, Grey_-_Character, Gilliam, Tanya, Wilford, OMC, OFC Additional Tags: aromantic_Curtis, Homosexual_Curtis, This_does_not_have_romance_between Curtis_and_anyone_else, Curtis_adopts_Grey_and_Edgar, AU_still_on_the train, But_they_all_work_in_a_brothel_of_sorts, Train_Brothel, brothel, Alternate_Universe_-_Prostitution, Prostitution, This_is_NOT_forced though, Its_explained_in_the_fic, NOT_a_one-Shot, This_is_mainly_about brothels, The_train_itself, And_Curtis_being_a_dad_to_Edgar_and_Grey, Bottom!Curtis, Sub!Curtis, The_Ice-Pocalypse_still_happens, Just_that_the train_is_a_bit_different_than_the_movies, It's_about_500_cars_long, Still shorter_than_in_the_novel, but_longer_than_in_the_movie, And_it_has_a VERY_different_class_system_than_before, this_is_actually_WAY_nicer_than the_movies_cause_its_less_death, but_more_sex Series: Part 1 of Stagnant_Movement Stats: Published: 2016-05-08 Chapters: 1/? Words: 7831 ****** Your Salvation Is Dirtier Than You Thought ****** by Bam4Me Summary Instead of being confined to the tail end of the train, the makers of the train thought it would be a better idea to make them work for their stay. This is the story of that section, and how they turned the train on it's end. Notes Come see me at trashforsnow.tumblr.com See the end of the work for more notes   “It’s probably the last hope of survival on this Earth, we should be thankful we’re getting on at all. At least we won’t die.”   Curtis gave the man next to him a nervous look. He knew fully well that something was up right now, but he had to admit, he was just as nervous to get onto the train as everyone else in the line with him, and he just hoped it would fit them all.   Actually, it’d be stupid if it couldn’t fit them all, it was over five hundred cars long, and they were big cars too, it should fit them all.   It better fit them all, because Curtis doesn’t think he’s even been this terrified in his life.   It was a long line, and they were checking people at the front entrance before they got into the train. Some people were rejected, and Curtis couldn’t figure out what their reasoning was, because as far as he could tell, they all looked healthy.   People with babies were almost guaranteed to get in, unless the child and parent both looked sick, but singles seemed to be just tossed out at a whim when it was their turn.   Curtis really really hoped that they’d accept him.   See, none of them were paying passengers. They were going into the working class right now. Curtis knew fully well that he might spend the rest of his life working in the lower class here just for food and a place to stay.   It was worth it. Outside of the train, was sure to be certain death.   They were at the equator right now, probably the only reason any of them were alive at all, Curtis had never felt so cold in his life.   Curtis hadn’t even owned a jacket heavier than a backpack before now.   He guesses, he doesn’t even really own this one, either. He had to steal it.   He pulled it tighter against the chill. His bones felt cold, he kind of wanted to die… but not of the cold. He’s never felt so horrible before in his life.   When he got to the front of the line, they were terse and quick, telling him to take off the coat and stand up straight. Curtis did, but it felt like his entire body was trying to tell him not to, and he could barely stop shivering.   Someone grabbed his chin, and forced his head in either direction, gloves cold against him, as soon as he let go, Curtis recoiled from them, not sure if there were bruises on his face, but feeling like shit and trying to burrow into his jacket.   One of the dark eyed men shoved a piece of paper at him, and Curtis took it. It was bright yellow. “Go in the door to the left, give this to the officer there, and do not cause a fuss. If you argue or make things difficult, you will be booted off the train without warning. Next!”   Curtis had to be nudged into moving again, and leant down, grabbed the handles of his bags, and stood back up with them, high tailing it towards the door they had motioned to.   He could immediately feel a difference in the temperature here, and for the first time in weeks, he could breathe again.   ***   The first week was quiet.   Curtis could barely sleep. Everything was different now, he often found himself sitting up all night until he couldn’t take it anymore, after several days like this, he’d have to close his eyes and pass out before it was even time to eat.   The train was massive, in fact, it was so massive, that the four single cars he’d been confined to with so many other people, even with so many others, he felt small, and a little helpless.   He’d always been skinny. He just couldn’t help it, it was in his genes. He ate just like every other teenager in the world, that is to say, he’d eat the entire fridge in one sitting if he could get away with it, but his mama had always bemoaned the fact that he couldn’t fucking keep the weight on his body. She said his waifish figure was making her look bad.   He knew she’d said it in jest, because she always said it right before poking him in his ticklish rib cage, making him laugh no matter how bad he’d been feeling before, but thinking about it, alone that night in the darkened bunk that was in the carriage he shared with five others, he couldn’t hold back the tears that came out, and just barely restrained himself from letting out racking sobs that would wake up the entire carriage.   He pulled in a shuddering breath, and heard a noise to the side, looking over fast to see Mayah, a young girl barely two years behind him, giving him a sympathetic look. It made sense since she had made the actual mistake of crying everyone awake two nights before, and had gotten yelled at by Gerard, an angry old man who felt like none of this was what he deserved.   He was wrong. None of them deserved this. Curtis just wanted his mama.   She sat up in the bed, swinging her legs over the side of it. She wore soft sleeping pants and a tank top. She pulled out a pair of soft wool socks from under her pillow, and pulled them on, no longer looking at the tears streaming down his cheeks. She grabbed a sweater next, pulling it on, before sliding to the floor with a soft thud.   She wasn’t very big, in fact, Curtis would say she was downright starved looking, and Curtis thinks that she might have been homeless before the ice had come, because everything that was in her bags was brand new, obviously stolen from stores, and she looked around suspiciously while eating anything, like she was afraid someone was going to come and take it away from her.   Curtis felt bad for crying over his mother -a woman he’d lost an entire year before any of this had happened- because this was probably the only thing keeping some people fed and alive right now. He felt bad for crying over something he couldn’t help, when this is possibly the first chance at good help she’s gotten in years.   She walked the three feet over to the other side of the room, and tugged on his blanket.   He didn’t know what she wanted, but he wasn’t stupid enough not to realize she at least wanted him to get up. She barely spoke.   They weren’t in America when they’d gotten picked up, he’s not sure she speaks a word of English.   He knew fluent Spanish, despite having lived in an area of mostly white people who barely spoke the language at all, but you didn’t exactly live in Brazil your whole life without knowing any. It was kind of impossible.   He should see if she speaks Spanish, because he could teach her.   His arms felt numb as he tugged them into his sleeves, but as he pulled his feet out of the blankets, they already had socks on.   Her bed was directly across from his, and it might have been a terrifying place, but it wasn’t the most horrible thing in the world to fall asleep with those big brown eyes firmly fixed on his. Some nights, the way they looked at each other like they finally had some help in all this, was the only thing that kept him from screaming.   She wasn’t someone that he liked per-say, but he knew he’d probably cry if she had to leave.   He knew that the quiet way they looked at each other until they could close their eyes, was something no one else in this room would understand.   Everyone else here? Everyone else in this room was angry. They were so, so very angry.   Curtis and Mayah were scared. Curtis doesn’t think he’s ever been this scared in his life.   She pulled him out the door, and Curtis finally decided to say something she might understand.   “ Can you not sleep either? ”   She shook her head, and he let out a little sigh of relief that she could understand Spanish. “ I… I think I could if I tried, but I keep going back to the kitchens every night. I think I’m getting used to eating before I sleep. ”   Curtis made a questioning noise. “ The kitchens? We’re allowed there? ”   She nodded. “ We’re the only train system that hasn’t started working yet. ”   Well, that was news to him. “ How do you know that? ”   “ I speak with the cooks at night before sleeping. Since so many of us were taken from Brazil, many are passable or fluent in Spanish. Our train system is the only one not working right now. ”   Curtis couldn’t for the life of him, figure out why. “ Is… does that mean they’re going to make us leave it? ”   She shook her head, “ No. They just figured that it’d been too fast after trauma to make us start training yet. ”   Curtis followed her through another bulkhead door, frowning when he saw just another car system. He’s been in this one before, but the one ahead of them, he’s never been into. “ Training? For what? ”   She looked at him in shock, pausing in place before letting out a sigh. “ You fell asleep before that meeting. I could not rouse you. We’re to be… not everyone in this car system will stay here. Many will move on to work in other places. Our own bunkmates will move on to work as farmers and Doctor Davis is a scientist. He will go two train systems ahead to work there.”   “Train systems?”   “Each train system is a hundred cars. One hundred cars for workers, one hundred cars for us, I believe it is one hundred and fifty for the scientists and mechanics to work there, and another hundred and fifty for the paying passengers, the first class of the cars. If you do not wish to stay in our car system, all you must do is get a job in working class, or prove you’re smart enough to be with the engineers and scientists. They will put you where you fit in, and no one will make you stay.”   Curtis nodded, brows furrowed, “What section of the train is this?”   She opened up the last bulkhead door, and the room past was brightly lit, with a few people littering around, an industrial kitchen bigger than any he’d seen. It seemed to take up the whole car, and it probably did.   There were some people still cooking though, possibly for night passengers like them, or maybe for tomorrow’s meal. Curtis simply takes all his meals in the meal room three cars back with everyone else they slept near. He didn’t know he was allowed this far up.   “The brothels. We were put into the sex work class of the trains.”   Curtis just about brained himself on the floor when he slipped on his too soft socks there.   ***   So… sex work…   Curtis honestly isn’t sure what to think about that.   He kept going back to the kitchen car at night with Mayah. It seemed to be helping.   That’s where he met Tanya, and Liah.   He immediately knew there was something wrong with Liah.   Liah had a baby, maybe a year old, at most. He was small, with big blue eyes that followed people around everywhere.   He was so tiny.   Liah was tall, but she sat hunched over like straightening up might just be too much effort for her at all.   Curtis wonders how she got past the guards, because there was no way in hell she wasn’t sick.   “I don’t think for a second they didn’t notice I was sick. They ignored me, started looking at Edgar instead. When they saw he was healthy, they let me on.”   Curtis raised an eyebrow at that. He was sitting in front of the baby carrier at one of the kitchen tables attached to the wall. Little Edgar was sleeping there. Curtis was kind of happy about it, he’s heard rumor that some of the other passengers on the train weren’t exactly taking the constant movement very well.   Liah said that she’s hardly had to rock him any at all since they boarded. Apparently, the constant movement was amazing for getting him to sleep.   Curtis spared a vague thought for wondering what their future would be like. Would babies on this train later on get still sickness? Some people on this train, might never know what it’s like, walking on land that doesn’t move.   He was scared, and worried, and felt just a little bit hopeless.   Little Edgar didn’t look scared. He wasn’t worried about anything but getting his next meal and being entertained.   He was hopeless, but he’d grow, and become less and less as things went on.   Curtis couldn’t stop looking at his peaceful little smiling face, even in sleep, the baby looked happier than he felt.   “There’s doctors on board. Have any of them looked at you?”   Liah gave a gentle smile to the teen, shaking her head. “They aren’t going to tell me anything that I haven’t been hearing for the last five years. My days are numbered, and that number is shrinking.”   Curtis looked up, worried, “How long do you have?”   She thought about that for a second. “Well, by the time the month is up, I probably won’t be getting out of bed much. Two months would be a blessing, but I don’t think I’ll last that long.”   “Oh…” Curtis trailed off, looking back down at the baby with wide eyes.   He wasn’t sure what would happen to Edgar.   ***   Curtis wasn’t sure how this had happened, but he found himself taking care of Edgar more and more often these days.   Liah was smiling at them from the bed, laid back against the pillows while she watched Curtis pace with the baby. Edgar was easily gentled by being cradled in someone’s arms, and seemed to be fussing a lot lately. Tanya thinks that he’s cutting his last tooth.   Edgar rubbed his face up against Curtis’ shoulder as the teen sat down in a chair next to Liah’s bed. She had her own room, and Curtis wasn’t sure if it was because she was dying, or because she had a baby, but it was nice. The cabin that Curtis had been staying in before now was mostly cleared out, and Mayah was still staying with him, though she’d already applied to be reviewed by the mechanics up in second class, to see if she qualified to work there. Apparently, she more than knew her way around an engine, but Curtis hadn’t asked why.   Second class was a whole two day walk from the back of the train, but it was only a day’s walk from where they were towards the front of the brothel section.   Curtis still couldn’t believe they were living in a train that had a fucking brothel in it.   He guesses that it sort of makes sense though. It was supposed to be a train for high class paying passengers before the ice came. So, they probably had some interesting wants. Ew.   Liah was giving him a funny look, and Curtis raised an eyebrow at her. “What’s wrong?”   Liah shrugged. “He… he’ll need a guardian after I’m gone.”   It took Curtis a minute to get that. “You… want me to do it?”   She nodded, “You’re already the one who helps me with him the most.”   Curtis thought about that for a minute. “Won’t I eventually have to start working, here?”   She shook her head, “No, I’ve asked around. Curtis, this train is one of the last places of humanity left in the world, and even then, it’s very small. They need doctors, and workers, but I know they’ll also need caregivers for children. This train has an entire brothel , and as far as I know, the working class here does long hours, depending on what they do. People are going to need caregivers. No one would fault you for keeping to yourself and taking care of him all day.”   Curtis was so fucking scared here. He couldn’t help it, that sounded amazing. He already spent the majority of his time looking after Edgar since his mother became unable to get out of bed.   He nodded a little, swallowing around the lump in his throat. “Alright. I’ll watch him.”   ***   When Liah died, a lot of people cried.   Edgar didn’t cry right away, too little to realize what was wrong, but the longer he went without his mother, the more he knew something wasn’t okay.   Curtis cried even harder when he realized how lucky the baby would be. One day, he’d just forget she was even there at all. He pitied and envied the boy in both turns. He wished he could forget his own mother, but he also knew how much he cherished the times he’d had with her.   Edgar would grow up with a longing for something that he couldn’t remember, but a distance from it that never let the pain seep in like it did for Curtis.   He held the baby tighter as he watched the guards.   They were burning the body.   They said they could give him a small urn of her ashes, but the rest of it would have to be scattered from the train.   He asked them to wait until they were over the ocean next to do it.   Liah had talked about being on a boat as a child. She said it was the best time of her life, floating at sea.   He wanted to give her that again at least.   Less than a day later, he asks Mayah if she can make Edgar a locket or something out of the ashes. She comes back to him a day later with a small bronze locket that Curtis hangs from his mobile.   Curtis moves into Edgar and his mother’s room after that, knowing they need the space, and it would be easier for him to move, than for the baby.   Edgar is still upset, but he’s latched onto Curtis with renewed vigor. Everyone he knows is gone now too. Curtis will be damned if he disappears too.   ***   Edgar was smiling, bubbly and excited while he cautiously moved along the walls. Curtis had planned this out very well, and they had a few hours now of no turns on the train, so the ground under their feet would be most steady at this point.   Curtis knelt down on the floor, just a few feet in front of him, holding out his hands to the baby. Edgar was just big enough to start toddling on his own. He wouldn’t be very good at it for a while, but he was determined.   “Come on, Edgar, you can do it. Just come to me, now.”   Edgar looked down at his feet with determination, and took an unsteady step forward. He almost immediately fell, but Curtis just winced once, before getting an encouraging look. “That’s okay, Ed, you’re trying so so hard right now! You can do it, just come on, try again.”   Edgar looked up at him with a smile. Curtis wasn’t stupid. If he acted like Edgar falling was the end of the world, Edgar was going to think it was, but if you just kept going, Edgar wouldn’t even bat an eye at the tumble.   Edgar moved, getting his little feet under him, and pushing up against the ground. It was cute, so so damn cute.   When Edgar was finally up, he put a hand against the wall again, looking a little nervous this time. Curtis made sure to smile real wide at him though. That seemed to soothe the babe just enough to try again.   This time, he made it three whole steps before going down, but this time, Curtis was close enough to pick him up before he landed, voice excited as he held the baby aloft in his arms. “That was so good , Ed! You did it, you did that all on your own!”   He leaned up, pressing dry kisses to the baby’s cheeks, till he was a giggling mess.   Curtis found, that he didn’t really mind being here with Edgar.   Not at all.   ***   “He’s getting big.”   Curtis smiled, pulling the baby tighter to his chest. Since Mayah left for the second class section the month before, Curtis finds himself spending more and more time with Tanya in the kitchens closest to the end car section. Apparently, having someone around who actually know how babies worked, was pretty much invaluable.   Curtis nodded. Edgar was playing with a soft toys in his arms, completely enraptured in his own world. Curtis tried not to let him wander much in the kitchens, since he was so small, he could get hurt here easily. “Yeah, he’s eating very well. Not too many solids that aren’t squishy yet, but he’s eating good.”   Edgar didn’t seem to mind not being able to move about freely right now, content to just be tucked against Curtis’ chest.   He seems healthy and happy, that’s enough for now.   ***   Curtis was trying to stay out of any official talks between workers. Thing is, he didn’t want to move to the working class cars. From what he’s heard, they work longer hours there to keep everything running smoothly, and Curtis didn’t like the idea of needing to hand Edgar off to a stranger every morning and only seeing him at night. Besides that, he’s been to the working class quarters, and none of them were child friendly.   The other morning, a woman moved two doors down from him with a baby of her own. Apparently, he was right, the car he lived in right now was meant for parents and children. That suited him just fine.   He didn’t know how long they’d be on this train, or if they’d ever get off, he was going to claim as much space for them as he could, and as long as living conditions stayed as well as they were, he wasn’t going to complain.   The little boy that had moved three doors down from them was older than Edgar, at least three, and he had big dark eyes and darker hair. He was adorable, and sweet, and barely said a word, but Edgar had latched onto him right away.   His mother called him ‘Grey’ and that’s what he responded to, but Curtis wasn’t sure if that was his actual name, because she didn’t look at him like a mother looked at a child. She looked at him like he was in the way of everything.   Curtis immediately offered to watch him for her when she needed him to. She’d taken the help, but her relief was more ‘finally, some time alone’ than it was, ‘good, a nice person to watch him.’   Grey didn’t say much, but he watched everyone. He had the biggest eyes, and Curtis had wondered if he’d been born with them already coloured in. That would be a good reason to name him Grey.   He let Edgar climb all over him when they were together, and he never cried when his mother left to go to work.   Curtis honestly isn’t sure why someone would choose to do sex work. The idea was a bit odd to him.   He’s just not sure why you would let someone invasively touch you like that when you didn’t have to.   Maybe that’s the point of it, because you didn’t have to.   His rooms were set, five cars away from the kitchens. That’s exactly five cars away from the front of the brothel section -sex work section? Red Tail District? Let’s call it that one, that one amuses Curtis.   They weren’t that far back, but Curtis could already tell, that things would probably be more family friendly towards the front of the cars, because he never saw any children past the tenth car back.   Already, people streamed in and out of the sections like clockwork. More of them towards the end of the day. Sometimes, men and women left for a few days, which probably means they were going towards the front of the train to work there. Curtis was kind of glad that people just left him and the boys alone though, because he really didn’t actually want to get involved in this.   He frowned when he heard sharp voices outside the car, and looked over at Edgar and Grey. They were both playing with some toys that Curtis had gotten a hold of from another passenger in exchange for fixing a bunk in her room the other day. Grey looked up at the sharp voices, but seemed overall content to stay put, wary of the voices, but Edgar just ignored it all and kept playing with the single minded joy of a baby who just wants to enjoy the simple things in life.   Curtis got off the bed, closing the book he’d been reading and setting it back on the bed.   Nowadays, he seemed clawing at the walls for something to entertain himself. He had his laptop and phone that he’d -probably stupidly, but he was seventeen, give him a break- taken with him, but the train itself had minimal wifi capabilities, and he could only really connect to the train’s main hard drive.   Though, it did have quite a few shows and movies, Curtis didn’t exactly feel comfortable binge watching TV shows while he was supposed to be watching children, so he had been bargaining for books that people had laying around.   A lot of people had novels on ebook though. One girl, over in working class, she had every single published novel of the Doctor Who series so far… well, he assumes, there’s probably not going to be any more of them…   He sighed, pushing off the bed, and looking over at the corner again. Edgar was looking up now, ever in tune to his caregiver’s movements. Curtis smiled down at them. “You two stay here and play. I just wanna see what’s going on outside.”   Grey nodded, but Edgar’s brows furrowed. He didn’t do very well when Curtis left him, probably worried that he’d leave forever like his mom had.   Curtis isn’t planning on going anywhere.   He stepped outside the cabin, and immediately found an argument going on.   “Keep your hands off of me!”   There was a man there, an officer, none the less, obviously trying to convince the woman he was with to change her mind.   Curtis frowned when he didn’t let go of her arm, stepping over and grabbing his wrist. “She said , not to touch.”   The officer looked over at him and snorted, hand pulling back. “So they were right. The boys whore themselves out back here too.”   Curtis let his features move into the most disapproving glare he could manage. “You really should leave. Someone might mistake you for one of the whores and touch you where you don’t want it. Because, obviously, consent isn’t an issue, right?”   His well placed jab did seem to have an effect on the man, and he was at least pleased to see him back up a bit. “Whatever. Not like I can’t find ten more of you two further back.”   Curtis shrugged, leaning against the wall next to him. “Sweetie, you ain’t gonna find another one of me anywhere .”   The officer bristled, looking pissed now. “Why would I even care about you, you’re just a slut like everyone else.”   Curtis contemplated saying that he wasn’t a working boy at all, but decided not to even faster. “You should be really upset about that, you know. I’m a slut , I let people fuck me, touch me wherever to pleases them, all day long. And yet, I still think I’m above you. That should make you upset.”   The officer looked like he might actually take a swing at him, and a glance over at the woman he’d been hassling -a woman he knew worked just a few cars down from him in the front of the Red Tail, he knew she worked with scheduling most sessions with the workers, and she knew fully well that he wasn’t one of the workers… at least, not yet- well, she looked amused, and pleased as pie right now.   Curtis spared the smallest of smiles for her, before looking back at the officer, who still wasn’t even sure how to reply to him, and gave him a once over, up and down real slow. “You really don’t know how a red light district works, do you? You know, if everyone in the back says you’re off limits, that’s kind of it for you. You better hope you have some luck with people elsewhere, because you piss off enough people back here, you’re not gonna touch anyone .”   The officer paused, as if suddenly realizing that.   Curtis did know how this worked. The neighborhood he’d lived in hadn’t been the best, and he knew more prostitutes than he did kids his own age. He knew how red light districts worked.   Yeah, he’d been shocked as hell to hear about a train of all the fucking places having one, but he felt more at home here than he’d felt in his actual home before the ice had come, in years.   He knew how this place would run, and he knew if the girls -and boys- decided this man was off limits, he was off limits , bar none.   The officer took another step back, looking defeated, in an angry way. “Fine. I’ll just leave then. I’m not in the mood anymore anyways.”   Curtis snorted at him as he left, turning back to look at the woman. “You should get some kind of bouncer to stay at the front of the Red Tail section. Keep riff raff like that from entering at all. If they wanna talk with you, they get an escort back so shit like this doesn’t happen again. I’m happy to help where I can, but you gotta remember, I take care of most of the kids in this car when their moms aren’t around, I usually have a child with me. If someone wants a fight, I can’t always protect them.”   The woman looked like she was considering it. “You know, that’s an amazing idea. The children live in the front ten cars, and so none of them have reason to be in the back, but that means people like that gotta go through them to get to me. I’ll see about opening up the position to someone willing to do it. We can see about moving the children one car back, and making the first station after the kitchens one to set up appointments.”   He nodded, “That’s a great idea. Keep me updated of any changes so I can help where needed.”   She nodded, and before he turned to go back into the cabin, she put a light hand on his arm. “You should see if you think you could be one of the working boys. There’s a severe lack of men working in the Red.”   Curtis thought about that for a second. Actually, this isn’t the first time he’s been offered to have some help selling himself before. He’s never taken them up on the offer, but the working girls around the corner of his house had offered to help the year before when his mother had first died. He’d barely been scraping by, till his grandfather -cooky old bat who didn’t want anything to do with him- had been bullied by one of his aunts into sending him rent and food money.   He worked his jaw a little, “I… I don’t see why I would do that. I have the boys to look after. Edgar cries if I leave him sometimes. Sometimes he just gives me this pathetic look like I’m ripping his little heart out. I don’t think it’s the best idea to leave him right now.”   She nodded, “I know that. That’s something that can be worked around. At least consider it, when he’s a bit older, a bit less stuck to your hip.”   He frowned, “I don’t… selling yourself like a common-”   “Mijo shut up before I have to make you. I know fully well you grew up in the same kind of neighborhood that I did, so don’t talk like that. It’s bull, and you know it. Just consider it. You eyes that make people want to fuck you, and you’re prettier than half my girls. If you started working, you’d probably immediately get bumped into working in first class. The rich bastards would pay a lot for someone that looked like you.”   Curtis looked down, face red. “I… I’ve never even…”   She gave an almost wolfish grin. “Luckily for you, we’ve got a nice supply of viagra, and many girls and boys who would love to teach you.”   Curtis wouldn’t help the fond eye roll at that. Actually, that did sound a bit nice, to at least be able to work off some steam. Sleeping with a baby in your bed -lack of cribs in this section of the train- really made it hard to get some alone time, and he didn’t even use his in suit shower for anything other than the toilet, since it was just easier to go to the bath car a few cars back and take care of both of them there.   He shook his head, hand moving towards the door to the cabin again, “I’ll think about it.”   “Good.”   ***   Curtis found himself thinking about that offer way too often.   He still hadn’t taken it yet, but he seemed to be thinking about it way too much.   He was further ahead in the train section right now. Past the kitchens, and in a recreation car.   It was during the main working hours in the train, and so it wasn’t very crowded, but it had a few children running around, which was Curtis’ main concern. He had Grey and Edgar with him today. Edgar seemed to be moving non- stop since he got his legs under him a few months back, but seems to have worn himself out today already. Edgar was tucked up against his chest, having a little snooze there while Curtis looked out the window.   Snow. Everything was fucking snow.   Every morning, he woke up and looked out the small window in their cabin, and found snow. Every night, he stared out it before finally falling asleep, and it was still snow.   He’d never seen snow in real life before the ice had come, and now it’s all he saw.   It was heart wrenching how beautiful it was. It was even more heart wrenching, how many lives it’d taken.   So beautiful, and yet, the most dangerous thing in the world.   He hated it, but he couldn’t help but think how beautiful it was, in a passing train, so fast, everything was a blur.   One step outside, he’d die of the cold, but inside, was like a prison.   He gently ran one hand up and down little Edgar’s back while he watched it, till he felt a nudge at his arm, looking down to see Grey climbing up onto the seat next to him, not quite tired like the baby was, but clearly done with playing for now.   Curtis raised his left arm to help him tuck up under, and Grey snuggled in, looking out the window with him.   “Gonna watch the snow with me?”   Grey nodded, looking out the window, wary and curious in turn.   ***   “I just don’t see why I should even sell myself at all. I’m fine where I am now, aren’t I? They don’t require money to eat and live here, and even if they did, I take care of just about all the kids here, I think that counts for something, right?”   Hina -the woman who booked sessions with the girls and boys- frowned at Curtis, pouring a shot of vodka in a glass for him, before pushing it his way. Curtis took it and downed it without thinking too much about it. He watched her with big eyes. “Curtis, this is a closed community. Even if we eventually get off this train, most people here, are only ever going to know other people from this train. Now, in bigger society, sex is easy to come by. In this closed off community, sex is now a commodity. You’re smarter than just about anyone else I’ve talked to here, you should know, that when one party wants something that the other party has, they bargain, or pay for it.”   Curtis nodded, “Yeah, that’s how prostitution works, I’ve known that my whole life.”   She nodded back, “Then you should know, that in a closed off community like this one, things are going to become hard to come by. Books are going to be harder to get, food will eventually become tighter the longer we stay here. One day, they’re probably going to start restricting passage between the sections.”   Curtis nodded warily, “I… never thought of that. What’s this have to do with things?”   “One day, sex will be the biggest weapon on this train. One day, when people are tense and angry at being here, sex will calm them down. One day, when things like access and food are starting to be restricted, sex will loosen their hold on that. One day, when Edgar is older, people will be less likely to let him around their children because he lives in the tail section, and sex might be the only thing that allows you free travel to see other sections and let him interact with others.”   Curtis looked at the empty glass for a good long while. When he spoke, it was quiet. “One day, living conditions won’t be nearly as good here as we have them now, and sex will get us the things we need, and the upper hand to negotiate for better lives.”   She nodded, “Yes. One day, this will be the biggest weapon on the entire train that’s not a full on rebellion, and we’ll need that.”   Curtis was quiet for another few minutes. “I… I guess I could at least try. For the kids. I could try, just to make sure they get what they need. They won’t ever know anything outside this train in a few years. They deserve for us to try and make sure they get the best of what’s here.”   “Yes, they do.”   ***   Curtis didn’t feel as though enough things in his life had changed.   It was cold, he didn’t go to school anymore, he had a baby, and he lived on a train.   Though, some things were still the same. He was still living with working girls who called him pretty and asked to train him, and he still barely talked with people his own age, honestly preferring the company of the working girls to most other people around.   It was amazing, how little changes he encountered.   The first time he ever said yes to the girls, it was terrifying.   He’d never been touched like this before, and he kept thinking about Edgar, who was with Tanya for the day, and Grey, the little boy who’s eyes were so much older than his mind.   He couldn’t relax.   “Baby boy, if you don’t calm down, none of this is gonna work.”   Curtis was skittish on the bed. It was a big, soft bed, with silky sheets. He wasn’t wearing anything, and he had one girl behind him, gently guiding him onto his stomach, before digging her small, soft hands and fingers into his muscles. It felt amazing, and he started melting into a puddle against the sheets. It was a lot nicer than he was expecting it to be.   Curtis sighed against his arm, melting further into the mattress. The girl behind him smiled, looking over at the others in the room. There was one woman, and one man. The man was kind of on the big side, and he had looked more than happy to help train Curtis that day.   In fact, with his clothes off, he looked downright excitable to help him.   Curtis felt his own cock stir a little under him at the sight of the older man, and buried his red face into the soft pillow.   The girl behind him made a soft noise. “Oh… Ave, I don’t think he likes girls.”   Ave looked curious at that, “Oh? He wants the big bad Daren to play with him instead? I would quite like to see that.”   Curtis’ face was burning, but he quite liked these girls. They made him feel better about being nervous, and though he didn’t exactly like the idea of them touching him as much as much as he liked the idea of Daren doing it, he couldn’t help but feel an odd stirring in his lower belly at the idea of them watching him.   Fuck, that was dirty.   Curtis let out a little squeak when Daren took Anna’s place behind him, coaxing him onto his back on the bed, now that he was more relaxed.   Curtis felt his face burning hot, cock hard and slapping up against his stomach.   “Remember Daren, you’re a lot bigger than he is, be gentle or you’ll hurt him.”   Curtis turned to hide his face in the pillow a little when he felt his cock spit out pre-cum at the words.   Oh god, he hasn’t touched himself since getting on the train, he felt feverish all over. They hadn’t even had to give him anything, he just wanted this giant man to touch him all over. He felt the rough scratch of Daren’s beard against his thigh and arched up. Daren was the exact definition of a bear. Big and hairy all over, with a rough look about him that made you just a little bit scared when he first looked at you, but also kind of nice, like you knew he wouldn’t hurt you.   “Oh, I think he likes it when you two talk about him. Not sure if he just likes me cause I’m a boy, or cause I’m big, but he feels hot and pliant all over. He likes it when you both look.”   Curtis let out a soft moaning noise into his bicep, and Daren moved in between his legs. His thighs were soft, and against the rough hair covered torso of the big man, spread wide by how big the guy was, it just made him hotter.   Fuck, he was going to be a horrible prostitute if he couldn’t even last ten minutes while someone barely touched him. He felt too hot, and like any graze to his cock was electric.   He could hear the girls sighing at the sight of him. He felt like a slut, bent upwards at the waist while the big bear of a man held on tight to his hips, rocking up against him with gentle movements.   “He’s going to need a lot of training before he stops being a hair trigger.” Daren leaned in, sucking the soft skin between his thigh and pelvis into his mouth. It felt tingly and wet, and Curtis dug his toes into the soft sheets on either side of the man at the feeling of the touch. “Oh yeah, lots and lots of training. Would you like that, sweet boy? To get trained up by me and the girls. They would be happy to watch if you don’t want them touching, watch you fall apart like you’re doing right now.”   Curtis let out a high pitched noise in the back of his throat, close to the edge, and not sure how to get over. Not sure if he should get over. Fuck, fuck, he’d love to come back for more training.   If it’s this good every time, he’d love to do this job. It made him feel floaty and desperate, like it was the best thing in the world.   Okay, yeah, he might not have been the biggest fan in the world of touching himself before now, but he was probably a pretty big fan of begging others to touch him.   Daren moved one big hand below him, squeezing tight around his cheek, fingertips grazing the hole down there as he pulled Curtis up further.   Curtis gasped at the new position making it impossible to rub against the rough texture of the man’s abs, but that quickly broke off into a small wail when he felt Daren’s tongue coming out, and licking a long stripe up his cock, bucking up against him.   Like Daren said, he was a hair trigger from coming, and he did, almost painfully hard against the man while Daren mouthed against his sensitive dick, nuzzling in with his rough beard.   It made Curtis shake against him, twitching and spurting out cum against the older man.   When he finally came down, he saw Daren staring up at him with something akin to awe. “You’re so pretty when you come. Your cock twitches so nicely, and you even sound amazing.”   Curtis just blushed even more red, laying back against the soft bed.   When Daren sat up to grab a wipe from the girls to clean him up with, Curtis saw his cock standing to attention, eager and red at the tip. He bit his lip, wanting to touch.   “None of you…”   Ave came over to the bed, crawling up onto it and immediately attaching her mouth to his. He sighed against her lips, feeling sensitive and relaxed all over. “In this line of business, it’s all about the customer. It doesn’t matter if you get off. But, luckily for the rest of us, it’s considered good manners for us all to help each other out.”   Curtis looked curious at that. He hadn’t necessarily wanted Ave and Anna to touch him before he’d come, but now that he was sated, he felt the urge to let them use him as they pleased.   He really wanted to please right now.   Curtis gave her a wide eyed look. “I’d love to help out.”   Anna breathed out a soft sigh on the other side of him. “Good boy.”   Curtis didn’t think working here would be so bad. At the very least, he felt relaxed on a deeper level that he hadn’t been in months.   This was progress.   ***   Curtis was still in training a week later, when he was playing with the kids back in their room. He found, he didn’t mind any of this nearly as much as he thought he would.   Edgar was toddling over to him with a thick baby book, looking happier than he had in a while, and Grey was laying on the bed for a nap right now, obviously pooped.   Curtis pulled the baby into his arms with a smile.   Things were going to get better. He was sure of it. End Notes Come see me at trashforsnow.tumblr.com Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!