Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/4444433. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Shameless_-_Fandom, Shameless_(US), Shameless_(US)_RPF Relationship: Ian_Gallagher/Mickey_Milkovich Character: Ian_Gallagher, Mickey_Milkovich, Iggy_Milkovich, Terry_Milkovich_ (Referenced), Mandy_Milkovich_(Referenced) Additional Tags: Abuse, Alcohol_Abuse/Alcoholism, Past_Abuse, Unrequited_Love, Requited Love, Homophobia, Semi-Homophobic_Language, Swearing, Anal_Sex, Anal Fingering, Omegle_Roleplay, Mickey's_"Not_Gay", Not_Suitable/Safe_For Work, Angst_with_a_Happy_Ending, Emotional_Hurt/Comfort, Emotional_Roller Coaster, Emotionally_Repressed, Non-Consensual_Kissing, Consensual Kissing, Sad_Ian, Semi-Beta'd, Takes_Place_Early_On_In_The_Series Series: Part 2 of Omegle_RPs Stats: Published: 2015-07-28 Words: 3945 ****** You Love Me. And You're Gay. ****** by TheWallHadItComing233 I saw your bruises last night. Terry? IG Fuck off. MM Mickey... IG Fuck off, Gallagher. MM Why am I not allowed to worry about you? IG Because I said so. MM Not everyone is your slave, Mickey. I'm still worrying about you. IG (delay) Why not move out? IG Where the fuck would I go? MM You could stay with me... IG Ha, no way. MM Why not? IG The real question is why would I wanna do that. MM You wouldn't get the shit beat out of you? IG I'm fine where I am, at my house. MM You're not safe, Mick. IG I told you I'm fine, drop it. MM I'll never stop worrying about you. IG Well try harder, asshole. MM What, kill him? IG Shut up. MM I'm not opposed to trying. IG You don't know what the fuck you're talking about. MM I'm talking about ridding the world of another south side piece of shit. IG And making you a little safer. IG Don't text me again. MM Why? IG I don't need your shit. MM Because God forbid I care about you. IG You care about another south side piece of shit? MM (delay) You aren't hurting someone I love. IG Don't. MM Don't what? IG We're done, okay? I don't want to see you anymore. MM Why? IG Because. MM Because, what? Because I care about you? IG Yeah. MM What's so fucking wrong with that? Do my feelings for you interfere with you lying to yourself about what you want? About who you are? IG Just fuck off. MM I love you, Mickey. IG I'm not... I'm not answering you anymore. MM Fine, then. Just listen. I do love you, and I want you. And I know you feel for me too. You think that by admitting it, that's makes you a pussy, that having any sort of fucking emotion makes you weak, but not admitting it, or running off anytime we become something more than just fuck-buddies means that you are more of a pussy and a coward than you ever would be by just telling both yourself and I the truth. IG [no reply] I'm on my way, Mickey. IG Don't. MM Yes. We need to talk. IG There's nothing to talk about. MM Yes, there is, as much as you'd like to hide from it. IG I won't let you in. MM Your room has a window, Mickey. IG You're gonna break into my fucking room? MM I'll fucking shoot you. MM No, you won't. IG Yeah, I fucking will. MM No, you won't. The last time you held a gun to my head, we ended up having sex. IG Just don't come over. MM Why do my feelings scare you so much? IG Feelings are fucking crazy and I don't want that. MM Nothing would have to change... IG How would it not change? MM I know how badly you're trying to hide. We wouldn't have to go on dates or anything. IG We're not fucking boyfriends. MM We could be. IG I don't want to be boyfriends. MM Why not? IG Because I don't fucking want it! What's your problem with the NO? I don't want that shit! MM I see you, Mickey! I see the way you look at me. IG You're fucking blind, I don't look at you like anything! MM You've "left" in the past, but you still come back. Why? IG You can find someone else to fuck you. IG You're easy. MM You can go to any fucking gay bar and find at least ten guys that'd want to fuck you. IG I'm not setting foot in a gay bar. MM Why? IG It's fucking gay. MM YOU'RE gay, Mickey. Or at least bi. IG Shut the fuck up. MM You take it up the ass from a guy. I know you don't want to be honest about yourself, but really, Mickey. You at least like guys. IG THE POINT was that gay bars are too faggy for me. I don't want some twink covered in glitter. MM You could get someone tough and masculine like yourself. IG Well I'm not gonna be some dude's bitch. MM You are some dude's bitch. Or you were. IG I have never been your bitch! MM Well, we aren't boyfriends, right? What would that make us? IG We're fuck buddies. MM Were. You chose that. IG Because I actually have and had feelings for you. IG What we had going was good. MM Like I said. Nothing would have to change. We could just continue fucking. IG But you'd wanna label all that shit? MM We have labeled it. IG Label it with all your boyfriend bullshit. MM We wouldn't have to. I'd like to, but it's worth not losing you. IG So... what do you want? MM You. IG What do you want from me? MM Sex. Your company. Your touch. IG Whatever you will give me. IG So, fine. Nothing changes. MM If that's what you want. IG Yeah. MM Why don't you kiss me? IG Jesus Christ, I don't want to. MM I'm just curious, Mick. You don't have to. IG I don't do kissing. MM Nothing romantic? IG Nothing romantic. MM Alright. IG But you want that shit. MM Of course. But I won't push it on you. IG Why don't you just go find somebody who wants that too? At your gay bars. MM Because I want you. IG Why? MM I don't know. I don't control who I love, it just happens. IG Sounds stupid. MM Yeah, it is. Love is stupid, and illogical, and painful, but it happens, has happened and there's nothing I can do to stop it. IG How do you know? MM Know what? IG That you love me. MM Every time I'm near you, my heart pounds, I feel something that's like a mix of fear and excitement and anticipation, I want to kiss you, hug you, hold you as if it's instinct. IG Sometimes, even when we're not together, all I can think about is you. IG Sounds like it sucks. MM Sometimes, yes. IG You also stick your nose in my business. Is that a love thing too? MM It's worry. Human thing. I want you very badly, and am afraid of losing you, so I worry. IG My dad's not gonna kill me. MM He could. IG He don't got a reason. He won't. MM You're enough of a dick that you could piss him off enough to kill you. IG And also, I just hate him. IG I'm not a dick! Fuck off. MM You like hiding any emotion but anger. IG When you're not an angry little ball of fury, you just act like you don't care. IG An angry little ball of fury? You better watch your mouth, Gallagher. MM My dad gets shitfaced and takes shit out on his kids. It's not new. MM I love you, Mickey. Even the really shitty parts about you. IG I don't mind you sometimes. MM Aw, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me. IG Yeah, yeah. MM You know I only give two shits about your asshole dad because of you, and to a lesser degree, Mandy. I want you safe. IG I keep telling you I'm fine. MM You're being beaten, Mickey. That's not fine. IG I'm safe. MM He is hurting you, Mickey. IG I don't care. MM I do. I care about you. IG I'm not running away from my own fucking house. MM Because you, what? Like being hit? IG Because it's mine. MM Why not just call the cops on him? IG What, and send me and my brothers off to lock up too? MM And Mandy? I know she's got a lot of stolen property in her room. MM Stop worrying. MM Never. But I'll stop pressing you. IG Thanks. MM Do you mind if I come over, Mickey? Or if we meet somewhere? IG You can come over, I guess. MM I'll be over in a minute. IG ~ Ian took a few minutes to calm himself down from the emotional roller coaster he'd been sent through, before he tugged on his coats. He made an excuse for leaving and started on his way to Mickey's house. He took a deep breath in and knocked on the door. Mickey was exhausted and a little sore. Mostly he was irritated at how right Ian had been. About everything. How he was afraid to be gay and how he felt some of those things Ian talked about about how he knew he was in love. Mickey thought he was right about his dad though. He jumped up off his bed and hurried to the door when he heard the knock. "I got it!" He yelled at Iggy who seemed absorbed in a video game to even notice anyway. "Hey." He murmured when he opened the door, letting him in and gesturing to his room. Ian put a hand on Mickey's shoulder gently as acknowledgment before he headed back the the other's room, relaxing a bit as he returned to the familiar scent of cigarettes, beer, and just a hint of a scent that was purely Mickey. He sat down on the bed, running his hands over the fabric. Mickey followed him to his room, closing the door and looking over at Ian expectantly. He ignored how Ian touching his shoulder made him feel things. That wasn't important anyway. "Why'd you wanna come over?" Ian stood up and his stomach twisting nervously. He stepped closer to Mickey and kissed him soundly, lifting his hands to grab Mickey's upper arms. He pulled away after a few seconds and watched Mickey closely for a reaction. "What the fuck?" Mickey hissed, stumbling back once Ian had pulled away. "What the fuck was that, Ian? Is that why you fucking came over?" "I just..." Ian sighed and shook his head. "I'm sorry, I just had to see." He sat back down on the bed, fighting the urge to cry. "Forget I did it." Mickey's expression softened by a fraction. "Would you stop looking like a kicked puppy?" He sighed, moving over to his bed to sit next to him. "Not right now," Ian said softly, moving away from him a bit. He crossed his hands in his lap and looked down at them. "You said it didn't matter if we kissed or not. I told you I don't do that. That wasn't... I wasn't being hard to get, Ian." "It doesn't, and we don't have to again, I just... had to see it for myself, I guess," Ian said, swallowing to keep his voice from cracking. "I'm sorry I did that though.” Mickey rolled his eyes. "It's fine, don't worry about it." He smiled a little and nudged Ian's side. Ian licked and bit his lower lip and looked up at Mickey. "That was maybe a shitty way to start my visit," he laughed softly. "Kinda." Mickey shrugged, admitting. "But I'll let it slide." Ian moved his eyes to look at Mickey's crotch before letting them back up to meet his eyes. "You want?" he asked quietly. Mickey followed Ian's eyes before looking back at him. "Yeah." He nodded. Ian bit his lip and stood up so he could tug his pants and underwear off, and Mickey followed suit. Mickey felt like there was a weird atmosphere, one he knew how to cure but was afraid. Ian smirked and looked Mickey over. Fuck, if the boy wasn't gorgeous. He stripped his upper half and tugged Mickey close. Mickey pulled his ratty shirt off, looking Ian over when he was close before crawling on the bed on his hands and knees. "C'mon." Ian slid his hand between Mickey's mattress and box spring and dug out the lube. He slicked up his fingers and slid one inside Mickey, resting his other hand on Mickey's back. "Mm," Mickey bit his lower lip. Once he was used to the presence of Ian's finger he leaned back into it. Ian smiled a bit and slid in a second, wanting to get inside him as soon as possible. He scissored his fingers a bit. Mickey's head hung down, breathing deeply. "Mm, fuck." He fucked himself back until he was ready. "Okay. Okay, get in me, Gallagher." Ian lubed up his cock and he slowly pressed into Mickey with a soft moan. "Mick..." he murmured, sliding his hand up Mickey's back to loop over his shoulder. "Shh," Mickey said, wincing but as always loving the feel of Ian filling him up. He pressed back until Ian was all the way in. "Mm... Fuck." Ian's moan had gone straight to his dick. Ian took a moment or two to bottom out before he began moving, groaning quietly with each slow thrust. Mickey bit his lower lip to muffle any possible noises, reaching back with one hand to grab Ian's hip and Ian curled his hand around his. He folded himself over Mickey and kissed the junction between his shoulder and neck. "Fuck..." he moaned quietly. "Fuck, Ian, yeah, right there," Mickey gasped, loving being engulfed in Ian. "Harder." Ian complied, snapping his hips to meet Mickey's. Mickey pressed his face into his pillow to keep from being loud, one hand reaching under him to jerk himself off in time to Ian's thrusts. Ian gave a breathy laugh, digging his nails into Mickey's hips, leaving little crescent-shaped marks. Mickey groaned lowly. "I wanna..." he gasped, pressing back against Ian. "I wanna... I wanna be on my back." Ian narrowed his eyes, before he pulled out and flipped Mickey. He slid back in and put his hands on the small of Mickey's back, before starting to thrust again, closing his eyes. Mickey liked the kind of rough flip, groaning softly as Ian was once again inside and moving. He clawed at Ian's back, searching his face. Ian's mouth fell open and he rolled his shoulders back, flexing his back. "Mickey..." he groaned breathily. Mickey could feel Ian's hot breath on his neck and face. Mickey was panting so Ian could feel the same. One hand released Ian's back to grab the back of his head instead. Ian opened his eyes and looked at Mickey. He licked his lips, and smirked a little bit. Mickey's lips were parted and his face was flushed. Ian looked so good on top of him, felt so good. He didn't even think about it before he pressed their mouths together hotly. Ian groaned and moved with him. "Mickey," he moaned against a twin pair of dry lips. He panted and sped up a little bit, all of his nerve endings sparking happily. "Ian, Ian.... Ian!" Mickey hissed, head leaning back as he neared the edge. "Fuck. Shit. Fuck." He bit his lower lip to stop from moaning as he came. It took Ian two more thrusts before he came inside Mickey, panting and moaning softly. He collapsed next to Mickey, not bothering to question the kiss and Mickey was glad, because internally he was kind of freaking out. He was also super blissed. “Fuck,” Mickey sighed, smiling, panting up at the ceiling as he tried to catch his breath. "Damn straight," Ian laughed. He turned and kissed Mickey's neck gently. "God, I fucking missed that." "Fucking?" Mickey asked, smirking. "We fucked last night." "Still," Ian said, chuckling. He nosed at his neck. "That doesn't make it feel less amazing." Mickey chuckled, letting Ian pretty much nuzzle him. "Okay. True. It was nice." Ian let a heavy breath out. "Where... Where does this leave us?" he asked softly. "Same place." Mickey murmured, irritated that Ian was asking questions when he felt so good. Ian pursed his lips and nodded, flopping onto his back again. Mickey glanced over at him. "Is that okay with you?" he huffed. "Yeah," Ian said, his sweat cooling on his skin. Mickey got under the covers. "You gonna stick around?" "You want me to?" Ian asked, closing his eyes. "Yeah, sure." Mickey nodded. "Am I allowed to kiss you?" Ian asked, turning to face Mickey. "Uh," Mickey blushed. "I dunno. If you want..." Ian licked his lips and leaned forward to kiss him softly. He moved his hands to pull Mickey close. Mickey let his hands rest on Ian's chest, kissing back. Ian made a soft noise. "What happened to 'I don't do kissing'?" he laughed. "I changed my mind. Got a problem with that?" He asked and raised his eyebrows. "Oh, fuck no," Ian murmured, leaning in for another. Mickey closed his eyes and let him. Kissing was actually kind of nice. Ian moaned and grabbed Mickey's hips, pulling them against his own. Mickey sighed into Ian's mouth, hands trailing around Ian's body. "Mickey..." Ian murmured. He pushed Mickey onto his back and moved to hover over him. "I love you." His voice was quiet and eyes focused on Mickey's. Mickey uncomfortably turned his head away so he wouldn't have to meet Ian's eyes. “You mad at me?” Mickey asked. "No. Just sad," Ian said, turning to face Mickey. Mickey rolled his eyes and sighed. "Ian. C'mon." Ian growled and pinned him down, eyes fiery. "What? What the fuck do you want me to say?" he said. Mickey was surprised, but wasn't complaining. Yet. "I... I dunno. Quit being sad." Ian scoffed and shook his head. "Look, I get you don't give a shit about me, but that's not how fucking emotions work," he said, raising his voice a bit. Mickey tugged a hand from Ian's grasp and clapped it over Ian's mouth. He didn't want Iggy to hear and come in to tell them to shut up. How the hell would he explain that? "I give a shit about you." He frowned. Ian bit his hand hard. "Could've fucking fooled me," he growled, though he lowered his voice. Mickey quickly removed his hands. "Your teeth are sharp!" He whispered, glaring. "No shit, I bit you because I thought they were soft like pillows," Ian said, rolling his eyes. "Fuck you, you cunt!" Mickey scowled. "I like you. Quit being a bitch." Ian met Mickey's eyes. "Fine, I'm sorry. Dick," he growled. Mickey rolled them over so he was on top. "Asshole." Ian put his hands on Mickey's hips. "Fuckface." Mickey pinned his hands on either side of Ian's head. "Shit stain." Ian laughed softly and tugged on his arms. "Literal cocksucker." Mickey tried not to smile. "Could say the same about you,” he murmured as he leaned down to suck a mark onto Ian's neck. Ian arched his neck. "M-Mick..." he groaned quietly. Mickey smirked against Ian's neck before biting down. Ian pressed into it, his mouth falling open. Mickey gripped his wrists tighter, digging his nails in. Ian whimpered softly. "Shit, Mickey... What's with you?" he asked. Mickey kissed Ian quickly to avoid answering and Ian kissed back hard. So maybe this kissing thing was useful too, Mickey thought as he hardened and he groaned against Ian's lips. Ian rolled his hips up again, desperate for friction. Mickey ground his hips against Ian's, the ginger moaning blissfully. Mickey kissed Ian quickly before he awkwardly tried to get up whilst staying on top of Ian. Ian kept rolling his hips against Mickey, panting softly. Mickey reached down to stroke Ian's cock. Ian groaned at the treatment. "What are you doing, Mickey?" "I'm try'na get on you, Gallagher." Mickey's speech was a bit stilted in an attempt to be flirtatious. "Let me help. You're gonna end up hurting yourself." Ian said. It wasn't entirely laughing at Mickey, but it was a close thing. "Well fucking help, then!" Mickey hissed, frustrated but also kind of amused himself. Ian ran his hands up and down Mickey's sides. "Relax first. I'm not gonna fucking rip you," he said. Ian was smart, and Mickey bit back his impatience. "Fine." He slumped down. Ian leant up and kissed him again. "Deep breaths. I don't wanna hurt you," he said. Mickey took one very exaggerated deep breath, exhaling similarly, before he took regular deep breaths. Ian slid a hand between their bodies and ran a fingertip over Mickey's hole. "There you go," he murmured, slipping a finger in his still-slick hole. Mickey pushed himself back. "Okay, okay," he said, annoyed. "I wanna ride you now." "Alright," Ian said, pulling his finger out. He held his cock steady and let Mickey sink down. Mickey didn't moan when he sunk down slowly onto Ian's dick, but his lips parted and his eyes closed. Once he had him all the way in he paused for a moment, getting used to the position. "You okay, baby?" Ian asked quietly, putting his hands on Mickey's hips. "Mmhm," Mickey nodded quickly. They didn't normally fuck like this, though obviously it wasn't like they always had the luxury of a bed. Most of the time they stood up to have sex. "Just full." Ian met his eyes for a moment before he rolled his hips up. "Hurt at all?" he asked quietly. "A-ah," Mickey asked, pleased as Ian moved. "No, it's good. Doesn't hurt." He lifted himself up before sinking down again. Ian moaned with him as Mickey started to work up a rhythm, Ian panting with each time they moved. "Oh god, you feel so fucking good." Mickey panted when he got the angle just right. Ian flushed at the compliment and moaned with him. "Fuck... Mickey, fuck..." Mickey moved fast, fucking himself down hard, biting his lip, Ian arching into it, his eyes rolling back a bit. Mickey closed his eyes and started jerking himself off. Ian panted, his chest heaving. "Mick... I-I'm close..." he groaned. "Come." Mickey moaned softly, hoping to encourage him. Ian kept moving as he came inside Mickey, the thick fluid coating Mickey's insides. Fuck, it felt so good and Mickey saw white as his hot cum spilled across Ian's chest very quickly after Ian. Ian ran his fingers over his chest to gather up the cum, and sucked it off his fingers lewdly. Mickey watched as he slowly got off Ian, kind of mesmerized. "Are you okay, Mickey?" Ian asked softly, turning to kiss him gently. Mickey nodded before he kissed him lazily. "I wanna spend the night," Ian said softly, licking his lips "I... maybe,” Mickey said, thinking to his brothers. They would shit a brick if they knew. Ian grabbed one of Mickey's hands loosely. "You're amazing," he murmured. Mickey blushed red. "Nah..." "I don't think anyone's said something like that to you, but you are. You're sexy, and sometimes kind, and smart. And amazing," Ian said, smiling sadly. Mickey was still embarrassed. "You're kinda like that." He nodded. "Awww..." Ian teased quietly, kissing him again. "Shut up." Mickey muttered, kissing back. "I think someone's starting to care," Ian said, wrapping Mickey in his arms. "Jerk." Mickey sighed, smiling a little. "Don't run from me, okay?" Ian asked softly. "Don't run from your feelings like always. "I ain't runnin'. I'm right here" Ian kissed Mickey's forehead and closed his eyes. "I feel so good," he murmured. Mickey smiled a little. "Yeah? Me too." "I..." Ian started nervously. "I... I love you." He closed his eyes and braced for another rejection. It actually hurt Mickey every time Ian said that. "No one's ever said that to me before." He admitted in a murmur. Ian pulled away. "Jesus, Mickey. Really?" he asked quietly, his eyebrows furrowing together. Mickey didn't respond to Ian. He just said simply, “I love you too.”   Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!