Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/13548192.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      F/M
  Fandom:
      Super_Mario_Bros._(Video_Games), 艦隊これくしょん_|_Kantai_Collection, Super
      Mario_&_Related_Fandoms
  Relationship:
      Luigi/Mario_(Nintendo)
  Character:
      Mario_(Nintendo), Luigi_(Nintendo), Ushio_(Kantai_Collection), Travis
      Hicks
  Additional Tags:
      Literature, fan_fiction, Horror, Large_Breasts, Mutilation, Sibling
      Incest, Humor, Nullo, Eunuch
  Stats:
      Published: 2018-02-02 Words: 2081
****** What Mario Saw That Night ******
by Darfur_Maxx
Summary
     Some things are better left unsaid . . .
"Hello!" the naked nullo eunuch known as Mario sez, no, says; no, shits. "It's-
a me, Mario!"
Ushio was busy masturbating to animal poarn (the evolved form of porn,) as all
shitty kanmusu do when otaku aren't watching. Her ship cloaca chirped happily
and sappily at the Alfred Alfer x Drew Pickles x Pee-Wee Herman hentai three-
way, mixed with a heavily edited episode of Law & Order: Special Victim Unit
that was forcing its florescent, mood-altering strobes, to subtly rearrange the
wiring of her frontal lobe in such a way that will cause her to lose her
eyesight, and vote for a libertarian U.S. presidential candidate in 2020,
before she turns twenty-five years old. Her mood soured the moment she noticed
the greasy man standing behind her.
She turned her head slowly, glaring over her shoulder as she swiveled around in
her chair to face Mario. "Go away," She growled in her best impression of
Olivia Benson. "I hate you."
"No." Mario wagged his mustache and eyebrows in defiant, unrestrained
anticipation.
Suddenly, with all the agility and professional foresight of pornographic
variants of every single episode from every single series and spinoff of Law &
Order, she pulls out a handgun and cocks it, aiming for the heart, like an
elite police detective from New York City. "I said GO AWAY! You fat, dirty
FUCK!"
"FAACK-A YOUUUUU-SHIO!" Mario screeched as he unleashed a torrent of Super
Mario Fury from his nice and smooth front. It hit her right in the brain stem,
killing her instantly.
Mario stood in triumph, having finally put one of the attackers of Pearl Harbor
to a fate worse than overly sexualized brown-skinned American male prison gang
rape.
"YEAH! HAH-HAH-HAAAAAHHH!" This filled him with so much Patriotic Pride that he
enlisted in the U.S. military immediately, using the Nintendo Power™.
Because he was Super Mario, he was soon thrown in the back of a garbage truck
at the earliest convenience by two Green Berets, who were disguised as
undercover police officers, disguised as registered sex offenders, disguised as
Chris Hansen in a desperate attempt to molest children on school property.
"You wan' goin' de ahhmy?! Fatty bi'ch whit' boii, huaaaahhh!" one of the two,
non-descript pedophile warriors/felons/PROUD AMERICAN PATRIOTS screamed, right
in Mario's scrunched up testicle of a face. It was really loud and mean and it
turned Mario's doughy nullo eunuch sensibilities into an embittered gutter
demon of castrations. Mario mindlessly salutes and nods, before shitting
himself.
And thus concludes Mario's grueling boot camp experience. He now possesses all
of the skills and tactics needed to become a low level drug dealer, in the name
of national security. The two Green Berets had Mario dress in the blood-stained
clothes of a Serbian immigrant. Next thing Mario knew, he was clad in a cheap,
smelly, black and red coloured track suit someone got murdered in, and a pink
trucker hat that proudly displays "WILL HONK FOR YUGE_BOOBS!" in eye-catching
gold and black Comic Sans font.
"Now, go forth, and unleash your poarnstar destiny, you fat dego cuck!" The
Green Berets saluted him, before unceremoniously dumping him out of their
moving vehicle into a busy intersection in Detroit. Mario was almost run over
immediately by a cop car. Then narrowly avoids another one. Then a third one.
Mario was about to panic as he saw an entire squadron of police cruisers
zooming past him. It hadn't even been ten minutes and he's already facing the
fuzz at full throttle. One car actually hit him, as if on cue of his
realization. It crushed his kneecaps and it caused him to fall down, like a
doughy midget man. He made inhuman noises of pain and hatred, now fookin'
pissed that his knees got broke by the cops.
"JEEWWWWWWWAAAASSSSSSSSSSSS! SPICSLIT FUCKER WHOOORRREEESSS!"
That was all it took for the remaining cop cars to start spiraling and drifting
around him at high speed.
Little did Mario know, that in Trump's America, unacceptable, or even fake
racist, or sexist phrases in public are punishable by DEATH!
Low-riding dirty ass cops are swirling around him, like the water inside a
toilet bowl relentlessly sucking down a giant turd, like himself.
Even Mario can't stop this many cockholes and birth canals. He slaps his ass
fiercely, partly to empower himself staring into the face of death itself, in
the form of twelve police cruisers.
Partly, however, simply because he likes making an ass of himself at the worst
possible times. It was part of the reason Luigi had moved away from his
lecherous ass. The other part, however, Luigi and his friends don't like to
talk about.
It had to do with that one, fateful summer night.
===============================================================================
Dear ol' uncle Travis, the man that Mario used to look up to, had a weird
condition; one that caused him to fetishize, no, obsess over the act of genital
removal. He wanted to do this to Mario for a long time, as far back to the day
she was born, in matter of fact. In Travis' mind, since she was fourteen at the
time, and her breasts have grown fucking huge, that it was the perfect excuse
to finally go through with it. She needed them parts removed, of course,
otherwise she'll inevitably touch some other girl or woman's parts and end up
wetting herself, in matter of fact.
Which is gay of course, and therefore not natural nor godly, because God and
Black Peter says so, in matter of fact, of course.
Travis didn't understand the female body, or even the most obvious facts about
orientation or genitals, in fact, of course, in matter of fact, in fact. In his
eyes, God apparently hated mankind enough to demand him and his male brethren
to be attracted to unnatural gyroids with no penises, testicles or prostates to
circumcise and castrate, and the bible-themed key chains whispering sweet,
sweet madness was not helping him, Mario or Luigi lead remotely normal, incest-
free lives, so he believes that this is how the GAY spreads. It is okay for a
girl or woman to wet herself while touching another girl or woman's parts only
when she can see all ten of her toes on her bare feet. And only while their
toes are wiggling. If it's true for him, then it must be true for everybody.
Perhaps even God. God saw Adam and Eve's parts after all, but did not touch
them. Because He is a just, forgiving God, and He is not a total sick fuck that
will use your own love against you.
If only Luigi and Jesus were that lucky.
On one hot, fateful summer night, after Mario had her fill of her Mario Cum
stained toy that she loved so very much, it happened.
Travis flew in through the window across the room, his beard flapping in the
midnight breeze. The key chains were rattling every which way, and yet made no
noise. He saw his niece and nephew laying on top of the covers, with Mario
nestling her prey in her sleep, their animalistic actions apparent to anyone
who's ever lived through their sick sad little world, and not that hard to
figure out for those that haven't. He was naked and barefoot. Everyone in the
room was, in fact. Travis slid his hand down his body, until he reached his
crotch. Or where it used to be, for he had his genitals removed. There was only
smooth skin there, just like the key chains, his LORD, his MASTER, has decreed
to become a nice and smooth front, which he applies baby oil and lotion to
after every time he bathes while looking down upon where his genitals used to
be, while smiling.
Which is every single day.
His nice and smooth front also happens to contain a hidden scalpel, the kind
used to circumcise babies. In the LORD's wisdom, He told Travis to have the
doctor surgically install a hidden sheath inside his body, right next to where
the doctor rerouted Travis' urethra, which was next to the anus, like a girl or
woman's. Travis was now armed with the tool that will save the sanctity of
heterosexual hegemony. The key chains all pointed towards Mario, specifically
at her chest. Travis knew what had to be done. He clumsily waddled towards the
Mario siblings, picked up a boob, and sliced into the halal. He, unlike the
eunuch nullo doctor that was responsible for turning him into a nullo himself,
did not know shit about anything that had nothing to do with the giblet-headed
vomit modern day fathead pastors spew out, much less delicate surgical
procedures, and simply cut it in half. Mario woke up screaming, already driven
half insane by the sudden, searing pain. She looked at the cause, and saw her
naked uncle stomping her mutilated big boobs into gory red mush with his bare
feet.
"Good morning Mario," said Travis, "I am removing them genitals from you now in
matter of fact of course."
"MAKE IT STOP!" Mario screamed out, over and over. "MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!
I'M BEGGING YOU, TRAVIS! STOP!"
"I can't, or you will end up touching a girl or woman's parts and turn gay, of
course in matter of fact." Travis said matter-of-factly while waving his finger
at her, as if he knew what he was talking about in the slightest. His toes
suddenly grew sharp talons due to Mario's blood being in direct contact with
his blood-thirsty bare feet, and started raking her flesh to shreds! Clumps of
bloody skin, fat, and gore fell through Travis' toes as he plopped on the
ground sitting up so we could utilize both of his feet at once. He practically
disemboweled her through her chest as she screamed relentlessly on top of her
bed.
"AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK-FUCK-FUCK-FUCK-FUCK-FUCK-
FUCK-FUCK!-!-!"
The whole situation was excruciating and humiliating beyond belief. Travis had
already finished turning her mammaries into mulch, and is now coming for her
cooter, compelled by the holy spirit being channeled through the WordGirl and
Arthur-themed key chains (but not the SheZow one. That key chain just wants
Travis to watch more reruns of Caillou and give small children terminal brain
cancer.)
Mario trembled, laying on her back, her expression somewhere between what
Luigi's expression often was after "uniting", and the face Steve Irwin made
throughout the eternity of his tortures in hell; sentenced there due to his
love of those soulless, meaningless animals in life. The whole bed was covered
in her blood. Bits and pieces of what used to be her breasts coated one of the
few happy places that she had in this world, as well as her sweet baby brother,
pretending he was asleep and that this wasn't happening. The last thing she
ever wanted was anything happening to him, and for all she knew, he would've
went for Luigi if she wasn't there. She took a deep, laboured breath, and
mustered the effort to intelligibly speak out.
Just when Travis started to bring the scalpel towards her body, she started
talking. "Please, no more of this. I'm sorry!" She said as calmly as possible,
which came out in pained sobs. She was crying and hadn't even realized until
the tears started falling into her mouth. Utterly dehumanizing. "I don't know
why you're doing this, I don't even like girls. You don't have to do this, I'm
not gay and I never was, now STOP IT! FUCKING STOP TRAVIS, STOP!"
Travis wasn't listening to her. While Mario begged for him to stop, he pondered
for a moment. It didn't take him long to decide on his next act; he was going
to inflict her with a rapid-necrotizing agent that specifically targets the
genitalia. He thumbs over the Arthur-themed key chain until he finds a small
button, and presses it. A small, thin, pointy knife slides out of the Arthur-
themed key chain's crotch, making a "sssliicc-KH" sound. This knife was
designed so that the necrotizing agent was contained within the needle-like
blade, where it would penetrate the skin and act as a ghetto, Arthur-themed
syringe when used like one.
It was finally time to defeat the spirit of homosexuality, in the name of Black
Peter, Buster Baxter, Arthur Read, WordGirl, Caillou, Santa Claus, and last and
by far the least, outside of SheZow of course, Jesus Christ.
Without saying a word, he stabbed Mario right in the clitoris.
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