Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/10058450.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Rape/Non-Con, Underage, Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Harry_Potter_-_J._K._Rowling
  Relationship:
      Draco_Malfoy/Harry_Potter, Harry_Potter/Other(s)
  Character:
      Harry_Potter, Other(s), Draco_Malfoy
  Additional Tags:
      Explicit_Language, Chan, Slash_sex, Drug_Use, Self-Harm, Sexual_Content,
      Angst, Tragedy, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
  Collections:
      HPFandom
  Stats:
      Published: 2011-03-29 Completed: 2011-05-09 Chapters: 2/2 Words: 7235
****** We Are Broken ******
by hrmheatherrenee [archived by HPFandom_archivist]
Summary
     When Draco witnesses Harry's grisly torture at the hands of
     Voldemort's deranged followers, the course of his life takes a vastly
     different turn. Draco finds himself irrevocably in love with a broken
     Harry Potter and he's determined to pick up the shattered remains of
     the boy on his own even if it means breaking himself in the process.
Notes
     Note from SeparatriX, the archivist: this story was originally
     archived at HP_Fandom, which was closed for health and financial
     reasons. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its
     works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I
     e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but
     may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator,
     please contact me using the e-mail address on HP_Fandom_collection
     profile.
***** A Single Moment *****
Chapter 1: A Single Moment
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the other amazing characters
that J.K Rowling has created.
"A window/An opened tomb/The sun crawls across your bedroom/A halo/A waning
moon/Your last breaths moving through you/As everything, everything ends."
-Meet Me On The Equinox by Death Cab For Cutie
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Life can change drastically in a single moment. All it takes is one seemingly
irrelevant action to effectively succeed in altering everything. A million
things could have been done differently, but the fact of the matter is that
they weren't. 
Bright lights and loud crashes reverberated around the room as the order
attempted to fight off the deatheaters. Harry let out a loud gasp as his
godfather pushed him off to the side. 
"Stay down Harry," Sirius demanded, his eyes searching wildly for Remus and
Tonks.
"Sirius, I can help," Harry argued feebly. He clutched his wand tightly in his
hand. "I want to stay with you. Let me fight"
"No" Sirius snapped "Stay where you are. I'm not going to lose you James"
Harry was momentarily stunned by the name slip-up. His surprise wore off rather
quickly as he watched Sirius start to duel Lucius Malfoy. He searched for Ron
and Hermione, and was relieved to find them both huddled safely behind Tonks. 
This was quite the mess he had managed to get them into. A stupid, cryptically
worded prophecy had not been worth all of this dangerous chaos. He should have
listened to Hermione. It had been foolish to leave the safety of Hogwarts. 
Harry was pulled harshly from his pondering when he saw a masked deatheater
sneaking up behind Sirius, who was completely unaware of his surroundings, as
he continued his fierce duel with Lucius. 
"Sirius" Harry yelled, jumping up from his current safe haven "Behind you! Look
out" 
What happened next would forever modify the life Harry had once known. 
Sirius turned to the deatheater, narrowly managing to dodge the killing curse
that flew over his shoulder. The green light collided with the opposite wall
while Lucius Malfoy threw himself to the floor to avoid being hit by any of the
poorly aimed curses. 
Harry stood brandishing his wand. An internal debate echoed in his head. He
couldn't just stand by and watch everyone else fight a battle that he had
caused. It was his responsibility to help. 
Unfortunately, before Harry could reach a decisive movement, he felt a hand
jerk him backwards. He stumbled slightly until his back came in contact with a
scanty body. His wand slipped from his fingers and clattered to the floor. No
one heard Harry's cry of surprise. No one saw him struggling against the tight
grasp of his captor. 
"Don't move," A vaguely familiar voice hissed in Harry's ear. 
Harry did not obey the command. He continued to fight quite ferociously until
he felt a cold, sharp edge graze the sensitive skin on his neck. His eyes flew
closed tightly, and his struggling ceased with a sharp intake of breath. 
Bellatrix held Harry tightly against her with one arm while she held an
acumnious dagger to his throat. She applied a slight pressure on the blade
causing it to bite into Harry's skin. He felt a wet liquid running down his
neck and skittering below the front of his thin t-shirt. The small cut was
stinging painfully and Harry emitted a tiny, inaudible whimper. 
"STOP!" Bellatrix yelled. "STOP! DROP YOUR WANDS OR I'LL SEVER HIS HEAD FROM
HIS SHOULDERS" she shouted. 
"NO" Hermione's heart-wrenching scream cut through the frolic. 
Silence fell over the occupants in the Department of Mysteries. All duels came
to a screeching halt. Everyone's eyes locked on the terrifying scene laid out
in front of them. 
Time seemed to stand still. That was far from the truth though and they were
all harshly reminded of what was actually happening when Bellatrix dug the
sharp dagger deeper into Harry's throat causing him to cry out. 
"Don't do that, " Sirius shouted, rushing forward, his wand still raised. 
"Oh, I think I do that," Bellatrix sneered  "Drop you wand, Black or I promise
you that they'll be scrubbing baby Potter's blood off this floor for months"
she warned him. 
Harry opened his eyes hesitantly as Sirius lowered his wand and allowed it to
slip through his fingers, landing uselessly to the floor with an unnaturally
loud clatter. He clenched his sweaty hands into fists at his side and waited. 
In a way, it felt like falling. He was slowly dying while he waited to die. The
blade was still perched at his throat and, in any moment, Bellatrix was going
to bleed him dry. 
"Let him go," Sirius growled. "I swear to Merlin that I will kill you if you
hurt him"
Harry bit down on his tongue as Bella's fingers twisted in his hair and jerked
his head back roughly. The metallic taste of blood filled his mouth and he
fought back tears. He felt weak and helpless. 
"You really shouldn't threaten me, cousin," Bellatrix said "I could do things
to him that would turn your stomach. I could flay him alive right here in front
of you all. I could make you watch as I rip his eyes from their sockets. You'd
never be able to get the images out of your mind. His screams would forever
ring in your ears" 
"Please," Sirius begged softly "Please. I-I"ll do anything. Just let him go."
he pleaded with his eyes shining with unshed tears. 
Harry's eyes met his godfather's. The terror in them was obvious and Harry shut
his own eyes quickly. He hated seeing his godfather so afraid but, more
importantly, he didn't want Sirius to see the fear that mirrored his own
reflected back at him from Harry's eyes. He didn't want the only family he had
left to see how scared he truly was.
"How sweet," Bellatrix cooed "Did you hear that baby Potter?" she whispered in
Harry's ear "He's begging for you. I think he's going to cry. Such a bad boy,
Harry. Scaring everyone like this. You naughty little boy" she mumbled, kissing
his cheek before trailing the tip of her tongue down his jaw.
"I can taste your fear," she said softly "It makes me want to taste more of
you. So fragile. So innocent. I'm going to enjoy breaking you"
Harry let out a tiny sob and attempted to close his eyes tighter. Maybe if he
kept them closed, he'd wake up from this horrible dream. 
"Stop! Get your filthy hands off of him"  Ginny yelled "He's of no use to you.
Let him go. It's only a matter of time before someone is alerted about the
ministry break-in and the aurors arrive. You're wasting your time here. Let
Harry go and get yourself out of here while you still can"
"What a brilliant idea," An eerie voice answered. 
Harry's forehead erupted with pain. His head felt like it was on fire and white
lights danced behind his closed eyelids. The last little bit of the hope he had
been clinging to slipped away like sand in an overturned hourglass. He was
doomed. 
Voldemort had arrived.
"Your wit always astounded me Ginny Weasley," Voldemort said stepping forward
to stand by Bella's side. "You're not the same stupid, frightened little girl
my teenage self met in the chamber of secrets. You've filled out nicely. Your
mum and dad must be so proud" he hissed as he rested his hand on Harry's head
and proceeded to stroke his hair gently. 
A scream tore it's way out of Harry's mouth despite how hard he tried to
contain it. Pain radiated through every bone in his body, and, if Bellatrix
hadn't been holding him upright, he surely would have collapsed. 
A loud shout assaulted Harry's ears as the sound of the floo network flared to
life. 
"They're here! The aurors are here with Fudge and Dumbledore!" Neville yelled 
Harry was barely able to register the meaning of Neville's words. The only word
that he heard was Dumbledore. Dumbledore had come for him. He was saved. There
was no way that the deatheaters were going to get out of here now. It was
finally over. 
The sound of renewed fighting started again and Harry felt Bellatrix tighten
her grip on him. 
"Give it up," Harry spat "It's over. There's no way out. You're done for" he
yelled. His infamous courage had suddenly returned to him and he was determined
to hold onto it this time. 
"Shut your mouth," Bellatrix demanded, stumbling backwards towards the floo
grates. 
"HARRY!" Sirius called running through the masses of the dueling groups.
"Harry! Don't move Bella. You're not going anywhere with my godson" he yelled. 
Harry fought against Bella's arms as Sirius rushed towards him with his wand
pointed at Bella's head. He saw Voldemort dueling with Dumbledore from the
corner of his eye and he prayed that Dumbledore won. 
"Don't come any closer," Bellatrix growled raising the dagger to Harry's throat
once again "I could still kill him before you're able to utter a word, Black"
she warned 
"They're sealing the floo networks. You've got nowhere to go," Sirius said
"Dragging Harry around is only slowing you down. If you give me my godson, I'll
give you my portkey. You can leave and I promise I won't come after you" 
Harry felt Bellatrix loosen her hold on him slightly. The blade left his neck
once again as Bellatrix reached out for the portkey. 
"Don't even think about it," Voldemort roared turning his wand on Sirius. 
Harry's heart froze in his chest. Dumbledore was nowhere in sight. It was if
the old man had vanished into thin air. 
Voldemort reached out for Bellatrix, and the hand that had been seconds away
from accepting the portkey found it's way into Voldemort's bony hand instead. 
"NO!" Sirius' scream rang out over the ongoing battle. 
The aurors were now running towards Bellatrix, Voldemort, Harry, and Sirius but
it was already too late. A small pop sounded as Voldemort disapparted with
Bellatrix and Harry by his side. 
Sirius fell to his knees staring at the spot where his godson had been standing
seconds before. His soul-shattering sobs started and he became oblivious to the
screams of terror and the similar sobs of grieving that emitted from the others
around him for an entirely different reason. 
In a single moment, one life had been lost and another was about to be
destroyed forever. 
***** I Know You're Gone *****
Chapter 2: I Know You're Gone
"I know you're gone/I know you're leaving me/Behind your dreams/Behind your
prayers/What do you think?/What do you want?/What do you love?"
-Gone by Jessica Riddle
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The tears seemed to never stop flowing at Grimmauld Place. During any given
hour, someone was sobbing for one reason or another. People came and went quite
often but words were rarely exchanged between the occupants of the old house. 
The only sound that broke the uncomfortable silence was the continuous weeping
that echoed through the hollow halls serving only to remind them of exactly
what they had lost. It did nothing to comfort anyone but, then again, it wasn't
as if anyone could be consoled regardless of the methods that some attempted. 
The aurors had been unable to retrieve Dumbledore's body from beyond the
enigmatic veil in the Department of Mysteries. However, the failure to recover
the old man's remains did not permit the Order of the Phoenix from mourning the
loss of their leader. 
The Daily Prophet had retracted the earlier slander they had printed in their
newspapers all year long about the former headmaster of Hogwarts. They now
focused on editing various renditions of his life story, most of which was
fabricated. 
Unfortantly, Albus Dumbledore wasn't the only person absent. The news of Harry
Potter's disappearance had spread like wildfire. Posters had already been
posted all over the wizarding world and everyone was searching frantically to
find the teen boy. Every second that ticked by felt like a lifetime to Harry's
friends and family. 
The hourglass had been overturned and the sands of time were falling quickly.
Everyone was all too aware of what was probably happening to Harry but no one
was willing to say it out loud. Voicing their concerns only made them seem more
real. 
Sirius Black sat in his brother's old room, his back to the wall and a nearly
depleted bottle of firewhiskey clutched in his hand. It had been less than
twenty four hours since he had lost the only person that had ever really
mattered to him. 
"Sirius," Remus said, leaning in the doorway of the room. "Molly is here. She's
been baking for the last three hours. I think it helps keep her mind off of
things." he muttered
Sirius grunted in response and took another swig from the bottle of liquid in
his hand. 
Remus continued, "Are you hungry? You should come downstairs and have something
to eat."
Sirius shook his head, "Not hungry," he replied with a shrug "Do you think
they're feeding Harry?" he whispered
Remus sighed and gripped the doorframe tightly, his knuckles turning white and
his nails biting into the pristine wood. "Don't do this, Sirius," he pleaded.
"We can't think negative thoughts right now. We have to stay strong and alert.
We're no good to Harry if we focus on anything but getting him back alive."
"I let him down," Sirius mumbled, completely ignoring the things Remus had just
said. "He was right in front of me. I was close enough to touch him and I just
let him go. I could have stopped Lestrange. I shouldn't have let her take
Harry."
"You didn't let anyone do anything," Remus replied, walking into the room and
shutting the door behind him. "Nothing that happened at the ministry was your
fault. It was no one's fault."
Sirius ignored him and continued, "That's what I do though, isn't it?" he
muttered "I let the people I love down. I let my parents down. I never lived up
to their expectations. I let my brother down when he needed me the most. Reggie
made some bad choices, yeah? He tried to make it better once but he couldn't do
it alone. If I would have just fucking helped him." he hissed
"Sirius, stop," Remus interrupted
Sirius once again ignored him. "I let my best friend down. James was always
there for me. He was my best mate, he was. He trusted me. He needed me and I
pissed off." he cried, draining the rest of his whiskey and throwing the bottle
against the opposite wall. The loud crash reverberated around the small room.
The shattered pieces of the broken bottle littered the floor and Sirius stated
at them blankly as a dry sob escaped his throat. 
"Lily trusted me with her baby boy," Sirius cried "Do you remember how she
refused to let me hold Harry at the hospital? She claimed I'd drop him. She
threatened to hex me everytime I touched him. He was so small and so fragile. I
was so happy the first time she finally put him in my arms. I didn't even mind
that Lily was screeching in my ear about supporting his head and not clutching
him too tightly. I just- I melted completely when he looked up at me with those
green eyes. I saw him and I loved him, Moony. Merlin, I loved him."
Remus smiled and slowly sat down in the floor next to Sirius. "I always
resented the fact that Lily and James chose you to be Harry's godfather." he
admitted "I am the more responsible one after all. Lily was always complaining
about how immature you were. It was such a contradiction when they appointed
you Harry's godfather. I waited for you to mess up, but you didn't. You were
perfect with Harry. He adored you, and you knew exactly what to do when he
cried or when he was hungry, tired, grouchy... It didn't matter what he was
feeling. You could always decode his emotions. It was as though you had this
unearthly connection with him right away."
"That's a bloody lie," Sirius scoffed. "I had no idea what I was doing. I was
terrified. I had no clue what to do when he cried so I'd just try it all until
he stopped." he mumbled, staring down at the floor. 
"He adored you. He'd be ecstatic to know that you're now a free man," Remus
said. "I hope Pettigrew receives the kiss. He deserves worse. I don't think
they should have made torturing prisoners in Azkaban illegal."
Sirius chuckled, "It's probably a good thing that they did. Otherwise, I most
likely would have spent the majority of my time in prison under the Cruciatus
Curse." he muttered. "They all thought I was responsible for James and Lily's
deaths. I would never...I wouldn't have-"
"I know," Remus interrupted. "I always knew deep down but I was so
distraught...so alone. We all needed someone to blame and the world chose you.
I should have fought for you. I'm not worthy of anyone's friendship."
"You were mislead," Sirius replied. "I still love you despite it all." he
whispered, resting his head on Lupin's shoulder. "It's a hollow victory. I
wanted to be a free man so I could take care of Harry but he's gone.
Pettigrew's arrest at the ministry didn't bring me happiness. Without Harry, my
aquital means nothing."
"We'll bring Harry home," Remus promised. The sound of the floo network flaring
to life signaled the arrival of more Order members.
Remus sighed, "We have an Order meeting in a few minutes. Molly has been
fighting tooth and nail to keep Ron and Hermione out of the meeting but those
children are relentless." he told his friend.
"They're just scared, Moony." Sirius said. "They have a right to know what's
going on. Harry is their best friend. Dumbledore wouldn't have stood a chance
if he told us that we couldn't be involved in meetings that concerned James."
he mumbled quietly. "Who is conducting the meeting now that Dumbledore is..."
he trailed off. He couldn't bring himself to say the words.
"Snape," Remus answered with a scowl. "Apparently Dumbledore relied all
information to Snape before his unexpected demise. He's smug about the whole
situation. I'm trying really hard not to hex his bullocks off." he admitted.
"James would be proud to hear that you haven't completely abandoned your
marauder roots," Sirius teased. "Snivellus should consider himself lucky that
you didn't hex him back when you were teaching in Harry's third year. He's
deserved a nice hexing for years now. I would have already done it but everyone
keeps telling me to grow up and act like an adult."
"That's probably a good idea," Remus joked. "You are a grown man now, Padfoot."
he reminded him.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Sirius brushed his comment off. He turned his head and
buried his face in Lupin's shoulder. "I want Harry back." his muffled voice
whispered.
"Me too, Padfoot." Remus said, rubbing his best friend's back soothingly. "Me
too"
They sat together in silence for a few moments listening to the commotion
downstairs. Molly was arguing with a sobbing Hermione and a shouting Ron once
again while Order members continued to arrive and pick their respective sides
in the spat between Mrs. Weasley and the two stubborn Gryffindors. Sirius had
started to cry softly into the thin folds of Lupin's shirt and Remus continued
to rub the distraught man's back while he starred at the mundane wall in front
of him blankly. Finally, Remus broke the uncomfortable and tense quiet.
"We need to get downstairs for the meeting," Remus said, removing Sirius from
his person and getting to his feet. "Molly made a huge meal but I doubt she'll
have much luck trying to forcefeed any of us. The idea of food right now
doesn't seem very appealing."
Sirius sniffled loudly and wiped his eyes with his fists. He stood up and
leaned back against the wall while he waited for the room to stop spinning.
"I have to stop drinking," Sirius muttered.
"I couldn't agree more," Remus said, helping Sirius cross the room. He kept a
tight grip on his friend as they made their way through the hall and down the
stairs.
They pair entered the kitchen to find the members of the Order grouped around
the table. They all wore similar looks of sadness. Hermione and Ron had
apparently won the arguement with Molly since they were seated at the end of
the table. Hermione's face was buried in Ron's shoulder and the normally well
composed redhead was a mess with his bloodshot eyes and dishelved hair. It was
easy to see how deeply their best friend's abduction affected the two
Gryffindors.
"You're late," Snape hissed. His ever present sneer was not present and his
words lacked their usual condescending tone. "And Black smells like he fell
into a vat of whiskey. For Merlin's sake, he's drunk. Perhaps you should put
him to bed, Lupin"
"You can't keep me out of this meeting, Snivellus!" Sirius shouted, getting to
his feet with his wand drawn. "You have no right to tell me to leave. My godson
is gone!" he yelled "You're supposed to be some great spy. Why in the bloody
hell haven't you found Harry's location?"
"Sirius, calm down." Remus demanded. "Sit down now" he snapped, pushing Sirius
back down into his chair.
Sirius scoffed and glared at Severus for a moment before putting his wand away.
His intense glare never faltered though as he kept his eyes locked on Snape.
"Severus, have you heard anything about Harry from the inner circle?" Tonks
whispered. Her usually bright colored hair had faded and taken on a dull, dark
gray shade. She had always been the one to cheer everyone up but now just
glancing at the woman only succeeded in making everyone feel more depressed.
"I am not a member of the inner circle," Snape replied. "Albus and I had
discussed stradigies to increase my rank with the deatheaters but we never
finished agreeing on how far we were willing to take my false loyalties. If I
were faced with the decision to torture Potter in order to establish my
unwavering allegience to the dark lord, I honestly don't know if I would be
able to comply with the demands." he admitted. "One wrong move could expose my
deceit and, no doubtedly, manage to get me killed."
"Surely you've heard something," Molly cried desperately, shaking with silent
sobs, "Anything about Harry! Oh my poor baby, Arthur. Oh Harry" she whimpered,
clutching her husband's hand like a lifeline.
"As I have already explained," Snape said with a hint of annoyance creeping
into his voice, "I am not a trusted deatheater with the dark lord. He questions
my true devotions. Therefore, I am not one of the followers he confides in
about his most important missions. I know nothing of Potter's whereabouts."
"Has the dark lord told you anything, sonny?" Mad-Eye asked, his eye was
spinning wildly in it's socket as he taped his cane against the leg of his
chair anxiously. "Do you know why they took Potter instead of just killing him
on the spot back at the ministry?"
"I believe Potter's kidnapping has something to do with the prophecy he was
tricked into stealing in the department of mysteries." Snape answered. "He is
aware of what the prophecy contained and the dark lord will stop at nothing to
retrieve the information that explains his connection with Potter. His goal is
to-" he paused and his eyes wondered to Ron and Hermione as he searched for
delicate words to tell them all exactly what would most likely be happening to
the young teenage boy in the clutches of the disturbed deatheaters, "persuade
him to reveal what the prophecy said." he finished with a frown. He avoided
making eye contact with any of the upset guests in the room.
"They're torturing him, aren't they?" Hermione's tear filled voice asked
softly. She sounded so small and afraid. It was a rude reminder of just how
young the children really were. They were helpless and, for once, they needed
someone to assure them that things would be okay. However, no one had the
ability to lie to the vulnerable kids in a convincing way. After all, they
couldn't even contain their own fears.
"Please, Professor," Hermione cried. "Tell me what's happening to my best
friend! I'm not an idiot and I'm not a child. I need to know." she said, wiping
frantically at the tears that refused to stop falling from her brown eyes.
"Don't lie to me. I am so tired of everyone telling me that Harry is alright. I
want the truth. I deserve the truth. Harry's my best friend. Please. I just-
God. Oh god, please" she sobbed, turning her head and burying her face in Ron's
neck. She clung to the boy as he stroked her hair.
"Deep down, I know that you, on some level, want me to lie to you," Snape said.
"It would put your mind at ease if I told you that Potter was being pampered
like a prince somewhere, but that fairytale is laughable. I will not lie Ms.
Granger." he told her, looking around the table. "Potter is most definitely
being tortured. I am unsure of the extent of his torture sessions but I have
been asked to brew several pain causing potions that I believe are to be used
on Potter. The effects of the potions are disturbing, to say the least. For
instance one of the potions I was requested to brew was a skin flaying draught.
Do you know what the skin flaying draught is?"
Hermione tightened her hold on Ron and sobbed loudly against his neck. She
shook her head "No. I lied. Ron, make him stop. I don't want to know." her
muffled reply emitted from her current position.
Snape ignored her. "I suppose you wouldn't be aware of it's effects. The skin
flaying draught isn't in most potion books. You're lucky to even find it in
books that deal with the dark arts." he sneered. "The draught causes the
drinker to feel as though he is being flayed alive. He is forced to endure the
feelings of having his skin ripped from his body without actually having his
skin removed. The pain is very real but the skin on the body remains intact
through it all." he explained, folding his hands in front of him on the table.
"Can you imagine what it would be like to have your flesh torn away from the
muscle and bone piece by piece?"
"Stop it," Ron choked. "Just stop."
Snape continued, "I was also asked to make an adrenal potion. When injected
with the adrenal potion, the victim cannot fall asleep. He is forced to stay
awake even though his body and mind are screaming for sweet unconsciousness."
he hissed. "He feels every ounce of the pain they choose to inflict upon him
but, unlike most of the lucky prisoners, his heart beats fast even when he begs
for death. He gets no blissful moments of sleep. His torture is nonstop and his
injured body gets no rest."
Most of the people in the room had been reduced to sniveling, wailing messes.
They had already known that the young boy would be subjected to torture but
hearing the methods used to cause him pain was more then they could bear.
"Shut up," Remus shouted, banging his fist on the table as Sirius cried into
his hands. "You're really enjoying this aren't you, you twisted fuck." he
yelled. "You sick bastard. How dare you-"
"How dare I what?" Snape cut Remus off, "How dare I tell the truth? Do you have
a problem with honesty? The girl asked a question, and I answered it to the
best of my knowledge. Of course they're most likely using the old favorites as
well. The Cruciatus Curse, knife play, flogging, burning, and bone breaking."
he said calmly, not breaking his eye contact with Remus.
The two glared at each other intensely for several minutes. No one spoke as
Snape's words created a vivid mental picture to accompany his disturbing
statements.
"Will you stop acting like bloody children!" Ron was the one to finally speak
up. "You're supposed to be our leaders now yet you have no idea what you're
doing. I honestly don't give a damn if you fucking kill each other but do it on
your own time. The only thing anyone should be focusing on is finding Harry" he
shouted. "It doesn't matter what those deatheaters are doing to him. He's
strong...He's- He's the strongest person I know and he'll hold on for us. He'd
never give up on us. It's our respondibility to find him and bring him home."
he choked, wiping his eyes in an attempt to get rid of hid tears before anyone
could see them.
"Oh, Ron," Hermione cried, clutching Ron's hand tightly in hers and resting her
head on his shoulder. "You're right. If only Harry could have heard you a
moment ago. You really were listening at the DA meetings."
"Always the tone of surprise," Ron teased, forcing a smile.
"You must understand that my goal is to find Potter," Snape interjected. "I do
not get any enjoyment from his suffering. I do not want to see Lily's son
dead." he said, getting to his feet. "The moment I recieve word on his
whereabouts, I will do everything in my capabbility to get him out of there
alive. It wasn't my intention to upset you by telling you about his torture. I
simply think it's best that you know the truth so you can be prepared for the
kind of condition Harry will be in when he returns" he explained.
Snape buttoned his black traveling cloak. "I will report any news I hear about
Harry right away." he said as his eyes wandered to Ron and Hermione for a
moment before they met Sirius' blood-shot, tear-filled eyes. "I promise" he
added, staring intently at Sirius.
Finally, Snape looked away from the crying, distraught man, turned on his heel,
and strode from the room hastily. The members of the Order sat in silence in
the dingy kitchen for awhile simply holding one another and trying to pacify
the people who were crying. When Molly served dinner, no one took a single
bite. The only thing anyone could focus on was the painful realization that
Dumbledore was dead and Harry was gone.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Draco Malfoy stood alone in his room with a stony expression on his pointed
face. The latest issue of the Daily Prophet was clutched tightly in his hand.
Harry Potter's face stared up at him from the front page. The headline read
"Boy-Who-Lived Missing: Is He Still Alive?"
Draco knew for a fact that Harry Potter was, indeed, still breathing. He could
currently hear the sounds of his screams and loud sobs emitting from the
dungeons. Bellatrix and Rabastan had been with the boy all morning. The screams
were constant, and Draco almost felt sorry for his arch nemesis. Almost.
The blond Slythrin tossed the paper onto his desk and turned to stare at the
photograph on his bedside table. A photo of him and his mother sat by his lamp.
His father had once been in the photo as well but now he was absent.
"Draco," his mother opened the door to his room and crept in quietly. "Are you
hungry, darling?" she asked, resting her hand on his shoulder.
Draco slowly raised his hand and placed it on the hand that sat on his
shoulder. He shook his head and flinched violently as a terrible, painfilled
scream echoed through the house followed by Bella's loud, gleeful cackle.
"You must eat something. You're far too thin. You've lost weight since your
father..." Narcissa trailed off. She choked out a sob and removed her hand from
it's place on her son's shoulder to cover her face.
Draco turned around quickly and pulled his mother into a tight embrace. He
rubbed her back soothingly and shushed her.
"Don't cry, mum." he pleaded gently, kissing her cheek. "It's okay. It'll all
be alright after I take the dark mark. Everything will be as it was. Father
will be fine." he promised.
Narcissa sniffled and pushed Draco away. She picked up the discarded newspaper
and turned it over to see her husband's mugshot plastered on the page in black
and white. His arrest at the ministry had not been easy for the family. The
dark lord had not been too pleased with the number of deatheaters that had been
sentenced to Azkaban. He was refusing to stage a breakout unless Draco joined
the ranks of his followers.
Of course Narcissa wanted Lucius back but she also wanted her baby boy to have
a life free of torture, murder, and dark magic. The last thing she wanted was
to see Draco end up in prison like his father. She was adamant about Draco's
decision to be initiated but she could not change his mind no matter how hard
she tried. After all, both of his parent's lives were at stake. His father
would rot away in Azkaban and Voldemort had made it clear that he had no use
for Narcissa since she did not wear the mark.
"Are you sure that you want to take the mark next week?" Narcissa asked, wiping
her eyes. "Surely their must be-"
"There's no other way mother," Draco interrupted dejectedly. He had resigned
himself to his fate.
"The dark lord is requesting your presense tomorrow in the dungeons," Narcissa
said quietly, walking towards her son.
"Why?" Draco asked with his surprise evident.
"Can you honestly tell me that you don't know why the dark lord would want you
in the dungeons?" Narcissa snapped. When Draco did not reply she continued,
"There's more to initiation than just taking the mark, Draco. You must prove
yourself. They'll want you to do so by participating in Potter's torture
sessions."
"That's no problem," Draco growled, clenching his fists at his side. "It'll be
most enjoyable to have a go at the golden boy."
Narcissa shook her head. "They're using more than just the Cruciatus Curse. I
haven't seen Potter yet but I know he's in horrible condition. I've seen Bella
leaving the dungeons covered in blood. He's a month younger than you, you know.
He's just a boy and they're using medieval methods on him that most adults
wouldn't survive."
"You actually feel sorry for him?!" Draco asked incredulously. "He's the reason
You-Know-Who is back! He's the reason father is locked in a holding cell at
Azkaban. It's his fault father is facing the possibility of recieving the
dementor's kiss. Everything that's wrong in this world is because of him. If he
had just died like he was supposed to when he was a damn baby then we wouldn't
be in this mess." he hissed.
"I suppose you're right," Narcissa agreed unsurely. "After all, he still hasn't
revealed the prophecy to anyone so they must not be torturing him that badly."
she muttered. "I'm just worried about you, Draco. I don't want you to end up in
Potter's place."
"I won't," Draco snapped clearly offended by his mother's comment. "Potter is
an idiot. I will serve the dark lord well. I will save this family and I'll do
it with honor and grace." he said. "You have nothing to worry about, mother.
Just let me take care of everything."
A piercing shriek issued forth from beneath their feet. Draco froze as Potter's
loud cries wafted through the manor.
"NO! PLEASE! PLEASE! I DON'T KNOW! I SWEAR!" Harry's voice pleaded. Another
scream followed his sob filled begging.
"I've asked Bellatrix to put up a silencing charm," Narcissa muttered, looking
frightened. "She refused. She insists that the screams be heard by everyone to
further humiliate the boy. I doubt you'll get much sleep tonight."
"It's fine," Draco said, turning his head so that his mother wouldn't see the
troubled expression on his face. "What in the bloody hell is he screaming about
this time anyways?" he asked feigning annoyance to cover his courious concern.
"They're scorching him," Narcissa replied. "I could smell his flesh burning
when I was downstairs this morning. It's quite unpleasant. I would have the
house elves bring you something up instead of going down to the kitchens if I
were you. It's best to avoid the stench if you can."
"I thought they surely would have killed him by now," Draco muttered trying to
tune out the shrilling sounds emitting from the dungeons. "I mean why keep him
around if he refuses to inform them of the phophecy's contents? Are they
certain that he even knows what the stupid, bloody thing said?! It's senseless
to drive us all barmey for something so futile." he complained.
"I suspect that the phophecy isn't the sole motivation for these little torture
sessions," Narcissa said. "I believe they just enjoy hurting the boy. The minds
of all these deatheaters are far too corrupted and mentally unbalanced. Even
your father seemed to be a tiny bit off every once and a while. Killing
someone, torturing them into insanity, it damages the soul. Your heart dies,
Draco." she whispered. "They won't kill him right away. They'll torture him to
death or until he's so disabled that his mind fails to register the pain."
Draco shuddered despite his attempt to hide his discomfort at the thought of
torturing Potter until he fell to pieces. He hated Potter. Truly, he did but he
was certain that he would not be able to torture his childhood rival in the
violent and sadistic ways like the other deatheaters did. He just did not have
the stomach for it.
"It's never too late to change our lives, my dragon," Narcissa whispered,
reaching out to gently stroke her son's silky blond hair. "Perhaps the Order
would be willing to help us."
"Will you listen to yourself," Draco snapped. He pushes his mother's hands away
from his head with a scoff. "We're Malfoys. They're not going to help us. They
wrote this family off a long time ago. And with Dumbledore dead, they're all
just searching for a reason to destroy deatheaters and their associates simply
for revenge." he hissed. "It's best to go it alone. We can take care of
ourselves."
"You might be correct about your opinions of the Order's prejudiced ways but we
can make them an offer that they can't refuse," Narcissa said with a small
smile.
Draco frowned, "And, pray tell, what could we possibly have to offer the Order?
Valuable information about how to correctly perform the Killing Curse?" he
asked with a snort.
"We have Potter," Narcissa replied. "If we bring him with us then they'll have
no choice but to offer us their protection and generous hospitality. They
wouldn't turn the saviors of their dear hero away."
Draco stood with his mouth agape staring at his mother as if he had never seen
her before in his life. "Are you taking the piss, mum?! That's completely
barmy! We'd be murdered before we even reached the dungeons. You best wipe
those thoughts out of your head. The dark lord is very skilled at legilimency."
"Hold your tongue, dear." Narcissa sneered. "You weren't raised in a barn.
Don't speak like a common sailor. I'm not, as you said, 'taking the piss.'" she
mocked with a roll of her eyes. "I think it's a brilliant idea. Potter is our
golden ticket out of this dreadful sitituition."
"It's too dangerous," Draco argued angrily. "Do you not hear Potter screaming
himself to death down in our dungeons?! Do you want to be in his place because
that's exactly where we'll both end up if we try to play heroes. We can't beat
them so we must join them."
Narcissa scowled. "You sound just like your father," she tutted, shaking her
head. "He thought he had it all figured out. He was to be the dark lord's right
hand man, his most faithful, most loyal servant. Where did his loyalty get him,
Draco?" she snapped. "Lucius landed himself in Azkaban because he chose to
follow that mad man! He disgraced this family's good name. We're living in fear
under our own roof. I want my freedom. Harry Potter can give us freedom from
You-Know-Who."
"There's no way that we're going against the dark lord. I am free! I'm alive
and I'd like to stay that bloody way!" Draco yelled. "I'm going to take the
mark and things will be exactly the way they used to be."
"Were things really that great before, Draco?" Narcissa asked softly, seemingly
unfazed by Draco's outburst. She looked her son straight in the eye for a
moment, studying him carefully. "Were you happy with our mediocre life? I
wasn't. The money didn't make me smile and our high standing in society brought
me nothing but annoyance. You and Lucius are the only things that really bring
me joy." she mumbled.
Draco frowned and turned away, attempting to avoid her piercing gaze. He didn't
like where the conversation was heading. He had never before really thought
about happiness and what it meant to truly be satisfied with life.
The sound of Narcissa's heels clicking against the hardwood floor filled the
quiet room as the woman strode towards the door. She stopped and turned back to
her son.
"I think it's time that you realize your dreams, my dear dragon." Narcissa
whispered in a mournful tone. "You are not your father. You do not have to
destroy yourself in order to become what Lucius expects you to be. I love your
father very much but he's wrong. He's always been wrong." she said. "Your have
your own identity. Don't lose it. What do you think? What do you want? What do
you love? Ask yourself these questions. You may surprise yourself with how you
answer them." she told him before exiting Draco's room and shutting his door
behind her.
Draco stood in silence staring at the spot where his mother had been standing
seconds ago. Her words echoed in his head, effectively succeeding in
distracting him from the screams still echoing throughout the manor. The more
he thought about her speech, the more he realized that he could not answer the
questions on his own. His mind always wondered back to what his father would do
in the given situation or what his father would think about his behavior. He
didn't know himself at all.
As Harry's screeching sobs continued to ring out well through the night Draco
started to think that maybe it wasn't too late to find out who he was and what
he really wanted to do with his life. Perhaps saving Harry Potter was what he
really wanted to do. Soon, Draco found himself crying alone in the dark as he
listened to Potter's cries of pain. The Lucius cloned Draco was gone and a new
man was emerging from the ashes of his previous life.
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