Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/251367. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Homestuck Relationship: Eridan_Ampora/Sollux_Captor Character: Eridan_Ampora, Sollux_Captor Stats: Published: 2011-09-10 Words: 2041 ****** Updated ****** by Chichirinoda Summary Sollux offers to webcam with Eridan, or is it that Eridan offers to show off for Sollux? Notes I honestly have no clue when this fic is set...and I don't care. Enjoy. Written for kink_bingo for the prompt: Exhibitionism Your name is ERIDAN AMPORA and you have a number of INTERESTS. Chief amongst those INTERESTS at the moment is determining why a certain YELLOW-BLOOD TROLL is trolling you. You'd ask who THIS DOUCHEBAG is, but unfortunately, you already know. > Eridan:_Answer_this_douchebag twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA] TA: hey eriidan, run thii2 program. TA: http://ta22erver.com/runthii2anddonta2kque2tiion2eriidan.exe TA: ii'll waiit. CA: are you fuckin kidding me? CA: wwhy the fuck wwould i just install wwhatevver stupid shit you send me like a glubable idiot TA: don't you mean gulliible? CA: wwhatevver TA: ju2t run iit, two be hone2t ii'm doiing you a courte2y by even a2kiing iin2tead of ju2t hackiing you and doiing iit by remote. CA: wwhat is it? TA: iit'2 ju2t an upgrade for your trolliian client, jegu2. TA: you would thiink that ii wa2n't tru2tworthy or 2omethiing. CA: did you send it to anyone else? TA: nope, feel priiviileged, fi2hpriince, you're my fiir2t cu2tomer, and also the beta te2ter. TA: ju2t iin2tall the damn thiing, wiill you? CA: glub CA: fine but im wwarnin you if this thing is just to bloww up my computer or somethin equally juvvenile my revvenge wwill be pretty fuckin spectacular sol TA: not worriied. > Eridan:_Run_the_program You run the program. Your husktop so far fails to explode, and the trollian connection appears to be uninterrupted, though it gains a red and blue border around the chat windows. They're not actually too unattractive, so you decide not to complain. CA: okay its installed CA: nothin much seems different TA: wow, ii can 2ee you. CA: wwhat? TA: hahaha! thii2 ii2 amaziing! ii reprogrammed iit 2o we can open viideo moniitor2 and 2ee each other whiile we talk. TA: man, your hiive ii2 fuckiing 2weet. TA: ii can't beliieve anyone need2 2o much fucking 2pace for one troll. CA: are you fuckin serious CA: you set up this wwhole thing and all you wwant to do is critique my design skills? CA: wwhich by the wway are obvviously just superior beyond your peasantlike mind to appreciate TA: oh 2top complaiiniing, ii'm allowed two celebrate a liittle. TA: the poiint ii2, iit work2, ii'm a geniiu2. CA: howw do i open a vvideo wwindoww to see you then? TA: you don't. CA: wwhat do you mean? TA: ii haven't iin2talled the patch on my hu2ktop, of cour2e. TA: why would ii want all of you nook2niiffer2 watchiing me whenever you want?! CA: wwait are you sayin you can sea me but im nevver going to be able to sea you and basically you just tricked me into installing this so you can spy on me? CA: id say its flatterin that youvve got such an interest but its really just flippin wweird sol TA: blah blah do 2omethiing iintere2tiing iit'2 boriing watchiing you type. CA: wwhat should i do? TA: ii dunno, how about 2tart by takiing that 2tupiid cape off. TA: iit'2 obstructiing my viiew of the re2t of the room. CA: its not stupid TA: you're 2tupiid. CA: youre so fuckin unbelievvable howw dare you address me in that manner? TA: becau2e ii'm currently holdiing the potentiial mean2 for collectiing 2weep2 of blackmaiil materiial iin my hot, lowblooded hand2 TA: ju2t take iit off, priince. TA: take iit ALL off. TA: ii'm watchiing. ==> Is he really saying what you think he's saying? CA: are you fuckin sayin wwhat i think youre sayin? CA: you wwant me to strip off all a my clothes CA: wwhile you wwatch TA: yeah, 2ure. TA: do iit, priince. TA: my bulge ii2 already throbbiing thiinkiing of catchiing a gliimp2e of your 2uperiior 2ea dweller phy2iique. TA: a lowblood liike me can't hope two have thii2 chance twiice. CA: uh Yes. Fuck yes. He is really saying what you think he's saying. This is AMAZING. ... There is absolutely no way in which this can possibly come back to bite you in the ass later. CA: okay ill do it TA: what? TA: ii mean, oh man, thank you. TA: ii've really 2eriiou2ly hiit my lucky day. TA: iit'2 liike my wriiggliing day came early. CA: your sarcasm is reely fuckin unappreciated sol so just carp it the fuck out TA: no really ii'm exciited. CA: really? TA: no. TA: but quiit beiing a wriiggler and get on wiith iit. > Eridan:_Get_on_with_it You aren't really sure exactly what you're supposed to do, but you undress every day. How hard can it be to do it now, even knowing that some dirty- blooded, desperate fool is watching you from several hundred miles away? Your collapsing and expanding bladder based aquatic vascular system is throbbing in your chest in a manner you haven't experienced since the day you decided to ask Feferi to be your moirail. But you struggle to keep your expression nonchalant as you begin to take off your cape, and then your scarf. Oops, the husktop is beeping again. TA: oh yeah. TA: 2howiing off 2o much 2kiin, priince. TA: iit'2 downriight 2candalou2! CA: givve me a fuckin break CA: im wworkin on it TA: you can't be comfortable iin that chaiir, priince. TA: why don't you liie down on the floor or 2omethiing? TA: ju2t make 2ure ii can 2tiill 2ee you. CA: howw am i gonna type wwhen im lyin on the fuckin floor? TA: who 2ay2 you need two 2ay anythiing? TA: do a2 you're told. CA: im of half a mind to forget this wwhole flippin thing CA: wwhy did i agree to this anywway? TA: becau2e you're fuckiing de2perate. Okay. He has a point. You decide to take the husktop down with you, anyway. You're not sure you can just lie there on the floor, stripping on camera, without the ability to see what Sollux is saying or to respond to his jibes. CA: okay im lyin on the floor TA: ii know, ii can 2ee you, remember? CA: fuck off sol im tryin to concentrate Fuck, this is embarrassing. You sit up just enough to pull the sweater off over your head, careful not to tangle it in your horns. That would really make him laugh at you. In fact, he's probably laughing right now, anyway. Your vascular system is still pounding hard, and you can hear another beep as you receive a new trollian message. Why won't he just fucking shut up? But there's only a single word on the screen. TA: oh. Oh? What does oh mean? You have a feeling it might be good. With a little more confidence, you roll onto your stomach on the plush carpet, and kick off your shoes. CA: oh? CA: oh wwhat sol? TA: nothiing, my fiinger 2liipped. CA: slipped CA: wwhat wwere you really doing wwith your fingers sol CA: come on givve me a little somethin CA: you touchin yourself sol? TA: take off the re2t and ii miight giive you a liittle 2omethiing. CA: fuck that CA: no wwait i changed my mind CA: you can see me right? CA: wwatch me good sol CA: and then talk to me You give your hips a little writhe, closing your eyes and letting your mouth fall open. You can hear the husktop beeping again, but you ignore it, your earfins spreading in an arousal display, showing off the gills tucked in behind them. You're literally grinding your bulge against the floor, and it feels good, but is frustrating, too. You hope it is equally frustrating for Sollux. Your hands shift down and push at the waistband of your pants, pushing them down. You literally writhe them off, kicking them aside as you roll onto your back, fingers splayed over your bulge to keep it mostly hidden from Sollux' view. Now you are ready to answer that douchebag again. TA: eriidan TA: holy 2hiit what are you doiing TA: uh TA: fuck TA: FUCK CA: not too coherent noww huh sol? TA: fuck you iim fiine CA: tell me wwhat youre doing or this is as far as it goes TA: hey you can't do that, thii2 program ii2 already miine and ii can turn iit on any tiime ii want two. TA: 2o you can 2uck my bulge, priince. CA: no you suck my bulge pissblood CA: ill just upright get myself another husktop if i wwant to CA: so if you wwant more you can answwer my question CA: just do as youre fuckin told lowwblood filth TA: fuck you CA: turnin this off noww TA: WAIIT. Wow, you can't believe this is working. TA: okay you want two know what ii'm doiing? TA: ii'm 2iittiing at my hu2ktop, at my de2k. TA: my pant2 are open and my hand ii2 TA: ca what are you doiing You realize abruptly that you've wrapped your fingers around your own bulge and started to stroke lazily, your head turned to the right so you can see each trollian message come in. It's a little awkward to reach over to type, but you manage it. CA: nevvermind wwhat im doin if you cant figure it out by lookin then youre pretty coddamned stupid TA: 2hiit thii2 ii2 2o fucked up. TA: okay TA: 2o my hand ii2 2ort of rubbiing agaiin2t my bulge2 TA: bulge TA: iit'2 hard two type one handed TA: ii2 thii2 even 2exy?? CA: just keep goin You close your eyes as the pleasure starts to mount, the carpet rubbing against your shoulderblades as you shift restlessly, knowing that Sollux can see every inch of you. This is the most exciting thing you've ever done. As you come, you arch your back, feeling the burn in your shoulders as you open your mouth with a shout of pleasure. Fuck, that's pretty messy. Well, your pail is in a completely different room. It wasn't as though you could really stop and go get it. Your husktop has been beeping like mad. TA: oh god TA: ca holy 2hiit TA: ii2 thii2 really happening TA: oh my god CA: it wwas your fuckin idea CA: did you come? TA: uh TA: yeah fuckiing hell priince that wa2 fuckiing iin2ane. > Eridan:_Indulge_yourself You lick some fluid from your hand and roll over onto your stomach again to type properly. TA: hnnngh... CA: wwell considerin the success of this particular vventure CA: i think im justified in askin CA: red or black? TA: are you kiiddiing me? CA: no TA: look thii2 wa2 not what ii piictured 2pendiing my eveniing doiing. TA: ii'll have two get back two you on that. CA: wwell all right i guess i can give you a little time to wwork it out TA: thank2 ii gue22. CA: at least noww you havve some idea of wwhat i fuckin bring to the table so to speak TA: oh my god ii momentariily forgot how annoyiing you are. CA: wwhatevver CA: wwe done here? CA: i need to clean up TA: yeah ii gue22 2o. CA: wwait > Eridan:_Remember_something There is one rather important detail that you hadn't considered. TA: what now? CA: wwere you recording this? TA: duh CA: fuck CA: you had better not fuckin showw this to anyone! TA: ... CA: i mean it pissblood TA: ... CA: stop doin that! TA: 2orry can't type two bu2y laughiing CA: FUCK YOU SOLLUX I MEAN IT DELETE THAT GLUBBIN RECORDING! TA: nope TA: 2orry TA: no can do. CA: fine wwell at least i can take comfort in knowwin i have incriminatin evvidence of my owwn TA: oh TA: riight well obviiou2ly we can ju2t mutually agree not two 2how thii2 anywhere, riight? CA: wwell just sea CA: but i can say that so long as you dont showw that vvideo your flipperin out ovver the sight a me wwill remain safe in my logs CA: and a copy in a remote location you dont fuckin knoww about wwhere i automatically back up all my logs to TA: fuck TA: 2eriiou2ly? CA: wwouldnt you like to knoww TA: yeah okay fiine iit'2 a draw today TA: troll you agaiin 2ome other tiime? CA: lookin forwward to it twinArmageddons [TA] ceased trolling caligulasAquarium [CA] Fuck yes. Best day ever. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!