Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/7581391.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      EXO_(Band)
  Relationship:
      Byun_Baekhyun/Wu_Yi_Fan_|_Kris, Do_Kyungsoo_|_D.O/Park_Chanyeol, Kim
      Jongdae_|_Chen/Oh_Sehun
  Additional Tags:
      Alpha/Beta/Omega_Dynamics, Underage_Sex, Age_Difference, the_difference
      is_of_5_years, Mating_Cycles/In_Heat, Mpreg, Self-Lubrication, Knotting,
      Orphans, Slight_social_issues
  Collections:
      the_EXORDIUM_2016
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-08-29 Words: 60826
****** Unexpected Situations and How to Face Them ******
by buttercream
Summary
     Baekhyun has a plan for his life. One that doesn't include street
     alpha Yifan.
Notes
     Baekhyun is 18 years old in this fic. South Korea's legal age is 19.
     Yifan is 23. The underage sex in the fic happens under circumstances
     pertaining to the universe. What I mean is that it is explained in
     the fic why it happens. This fic also deals with mild consent issues
     (no dub-con, no non-con, no violence), however, it can still trigger
     some people. I advise you to not read it if this kind of thing
     bothers you.
     This is omegaverse, so heat, mating, self-lubricating, knotting,
     mpreg and all that stuff will appear in the fic. There is no actual
     mpreg, but mentions indicate that it can happen.
     Even though it's a bit similar to our real world, this is still an
     alternate universe. I took a lot of liberty with how some things work
     in this AU: the foster system, college entrance exams and scholarship
     interviews etc.
     This is the longest thing I've ever written, and also the hardest. I
     don't know how I made it, honestly. I'd like to thank Sara, Cata, and
     Bee, who betaed for me and advised me when all seemed impossible LOL
     I'm sorry I whined so much about this fic. This would have turned out
     an even bigger mess if it hadn't been for the three of you. Also
     thanks to my tlist friends who encouraged me to keep writing
     (especially Kira Bear, who was going through her own struggles).
     Thanks to the Exordium mods for being so understanding and so nice to
     me. Why it was so hard to write this fic remains a mystery, since
     there's nothing special in here.
See the end of the work for more notes
It’s common knowledge that whenever a student is called to the counselor's
office, they’re in trouble. Big trouble. Not ‘one week in detention’ kind of
trouble. It’s ‘you need professional help’ kind of trouble.
Baekhyun is not a troublemaker, he’s an honor student. There’s no reason for
him to be called in if not for career counseling, and his whole class went
through that at the beginning of their senior year. Besides, Baekhyun doesn’t
need career counseling, he’s probably going to Seoul National on a full
scholarship. There is absolutely no reason for him to be called to the
counselor’s office. He tries to convince himself that this is a mistake,
they’re probably expecting Kim Baekhoon to walk in -- that kid is a menace.
When he knocks on the door, a female voice tells him to come in.
“Ah, Baekhyun dear, have a sit.” the counselor, a middle-aged woman who goes by
Ms. Kang says, smiling at him. Behind her, several motivational posters
featuring kittens and bunnies greet Baekhyun with ‘You can do it!’ messages.
“Ms. Kang, there’s been a misunderstanding,” Baekhyun tells her. “I don’t think
there is a reason for me to be here.”
Ms. Kang gives him a look that says ‘oh sweetie!’ before chuckling in complete
amusement. “Oh, I see what’s going on. You think you’re in trouble?” Chuckling
some more, Ms. Kang waves a hand at Baekhyun. “Don’t worry, it’s nothing like
that.”
Frowning, Baekhyun stares at her. Ms. Kang takes a deep breath and watches him
from behind her thickly rimmed glasses. “Then… Why am I here?”
“Well,” she starts. “You’re one of the students living in the school dorms who
doesn’t have a legal guardian.” Her voice is careful, soft, as if she’s trying
to avoid hurting him with her words. Baekhyun hums, and Ms. Kang takes another
deep breath. “This school has been responsible for you, and as you approach
maturity, it is also our responsibility to orient you in certain aspects of
life.”
Oh. So this is a ‘you’re an orphan’ kind of visit. Baekhyun was used to being
called to counseling sessions in middle school. Apparently, they were worried
that he would make the wrong choices (because of course all orphan omegas
raised in orphanages and attending schools participating in the fostering
program are prone to becoming 1) a sex worker, or 2) a hobo), but that kind of
treatment changed when he came to high school. This is only the second time
Baekhyun is meeting with this counselor.
“Certain aspects of my life?” he questions, and Ms. Kang nods.
“According to your files,” she quickly adjusts her glasses, opening a folder
and laying sheets of paper all over her desk, “It’s been a long time since
you’ve had counseling. Has anyone spoken to you about your first heat?”
Ah. Yes. The invasive, extremely embarrassing questions. Averting his eyes,
Baekhyun clears his throat. His cheeks are warm, and he’s pretty sure he looks
pathetically flushed. “Isn’t that kind of private?”
“As I mentioned, this institution is legally responsible for you.” Which is a
nice way of saying that Baekhyun is their property. “Until you graduate and no
longer require a guardian, we need to do our best to help and assist you.” Ms.
Kang offers him a weak smile. “There is information you need to know about your
first heat, if you haven’t had this talk with anyone close to you.”
“No, I haven’t.”
“Very well.” Putting the papers back inside the folder, Ms. Kang relaxes in her
seat. “The first heat is a valuable moment for an omega. It is the moment in
which the omega reaches maturity, and consequently becomes fertile. What
triggers the changes in an omega’s body during first heat are the hormones of
an alpha, which makes it of extreme importance that an alpha is there to offer
assistance to the omega in heat.”
Yes, Baekhyun knows that. He takes biology classes. Where is she trying to go
with this?
“Certain cases see omegas as young as sixteen years old reaching their first
heat, and it is not common for someone that young to be mated. If the family
can afford it, they can pay for an Alpha Shot, to make sure that their body is
provided with all the hormones it needs.”
Alpha… Shot? Baekhyun frowns at her. “Is that… Some sort of drug?”
Ms. Kang nods, opening one of her drawers and pulling out a pamphlet. “It’s an
injection. A hormone shot.”
The pamphlet she hands him is entitled ‘All you need to know about the Alpha
Shot.’ Baekhyun goes through the pages, reading bits and pieces. It doesn’t
look like an experimental procedure, so it probably means it’s been around for
a while. Then why wasn’t he aware of this?
The Alpha Shot, according to the pamphlet, is an alternative to an alpha’s
presence for young omegas going through first heat.
“This is expensive as fuck, isn’t it?” Baekhyun lifts his eyes from the
informative, meeting Ms. Kang’s eyes.
“It is. Your allowance from the fostering program won’t be enough to cover the
costs, and even if you decide to save up, it would take you at least two years
to gather the exact amount.” She looks at him with something akin to pity. “You
know the academic year is almost ending. We only have a few months to go.
You’ll be emancipated when you graduate, and then the allowance will be cut.”
The allowance is not his only source of income. There’s his part time job at
the juice bar, which is more like part time torture considering how much he
hates it, but it’s still paying him. He saved all year and now there’s a good
amount at the bank. For a second, Baekhyun allows himself to become hopeful.
Then he reminds himself of college, and how that money he’s been putting in the
bank already has a destination.
Baekhyun knows he will need some time to get used to the new pace his life will
fall into when he moves to college. That money is his safety net. He can’t use
it.
Of course.
Swallowing, he places the the informative down on the table.
“Have you thought about how to deal with this situation?” Ms. Kang asks. “Is
there an alpha you trust? A friend, perhaps?”
Baekhyun runs both hands through his hair. “No, I haven’t thought about it. I
was a little bit more worried about doing well in the college entrance exams.”
It was the first part of his plan.
Nodding as if she’d expected his answer, Ms. Kang reopens that drawer in her
desk and pulls a few more pamphlets. “There are organizations providing unmated
omegas with heat carers, alphas who can give them assistance during first heat.
You have options, Baekhyun, but you need to act fast. If you don’t have a
friend who can help, apply for a heat carer. You might not be thinking of
finding a mate or having babies now, and I support your decision of putting
your studies first. But not worrying about this now might threaten your
fertility in the future.”
She hands him the pamphlets. “Take your time to read these, and then send an
online application. They will email you with time and date for an appointment.
As the institution is your legal guardian, we will receive an email soliciting
our approval to your application, but don’t worry, I will handle it myself.”
With a sigh, Ms. Kang stands. Following her lead, Baekhyun rises to his feet
and bows, thanking her for her time. “In a few months you will graduate,” she
says. “Until then, you can talk to me any time you need.”
 
Baekhyun leaves the counselor’s office feeling a little fuzzy.
He knows how it works, being an omega, yet he’s been awfully dismissive of it.
In the big scheme of Baekhyun’s life plan, relationships, alphas, and sex were
supposed to come a bit later. He recognizes he’s been careless about something
so important as his first heat.
In a haze, Baekhyun lets his feet take him back to the dorm building, ignoring
the previous plans of stopping by the library. How many of his friends have
been through their first heat? Baekhyun is sure that Jongdae has, and he thinks
that there’s a chance that Jinri’s mysterious disappearance last year had
nothing to do with mononucleosis.
Opening his room door, Baekhyun pulls his phone and texts Jongdae. Classes are
over for the day, but he can still catch Jongdae on campus.
To: Jongdae
Where are you?
From: Jongdae
lab. ksoo found out that we can watch the soccer team practice from up here.
there’s a little supply room.
To: Jongdae
Why don’t you just go out to the field?
From: Jongdae
ksoo doesnt wanna run into chanyl
But he’s willing to spy on the guy. Figures. Tossing his backpack on his bed,
Baekhyun guesses he’s got some time to spare before going to work. On his way
to the lab, he makes sure to keep an eye out for every alpha who crosses his
way. They all seem so silly, teasing each other and ogling omega asses. An
alpha girl actually growls at a passing omega. Squinting at the behavior,
Baekhyun speeds up, deciding that if he’s getting an alpha, it certainly won’t
be from the student body.
At the lab, in the supply room, he finds both his friends crouched in front of
a small window. Upon spotting him, Jongdae pulls him to the ground.
“Practice is finishing, they’re removing their t-shirts,” he says excitedly.
Baekhyun peeks over his shoulder and watches a few shirtless people run across
the field. He rolls his eyes and pokes at Kyungsoo’s waist. His friend jerks
around, glaring at him.
“I thought you wanted nothing to do with Chanyeol.”
About a week ago Chanyeol made his interest known by inviting Kyungsoo to a
party. Kyungsoo’s been hiding ever since. Baekhyun kind of understands -
- Kyungsoo can be skittish -- but if he’s willing to creep on the alpha, he
might be willing to return his feelings. It could take some time though.
“I’m just observing.” Kyungsoo justifies.
Baekhyun hums, then moves on to Jongdae. “Do you think we have time to talk? I
need to ask you something.”
“Yeah, there’s nothing more to see here,” he says in a dismissive tone, moving
away from the window. “Are you coming, Soo?”
His back turned, the beta waves a dismissive hand at them. “We’ll talk
tomorrow.”
Jongdae snorts, pulling Baekhyun through the supply room door, out of the lab.
“What did you want to talk about? How was your counseling? What was it about,
by the way?”
Baekhyun looks around, trying to spot any potential eavesdroppers. There aren’t
any, most of the student body went home for the day. He steps closer to Jongdae
anyway, exercising caution. “She wanted to talk about my first heat.”
Jongdae frowns at him. “Isn’t that a little personal?”
“It would be,” Baekhyun shrugs. “To you. Or any other omega. The talks your
parents had with you, I get from counselors.”
“And what about it did she want to talk about?”
“She wanted to make sure that I have an alpha,” he snorts, a little
embarrassed. “Gave me a lot of pamphlets from organizations I can contact for a
contract alpha.”
Jongdae laughs boisterously, as usual. “There’s no such thing as a contract
alpha,” he shoves at Baekhyun. “You mean a heat carer?”
“What’s the difference? Isn’t it an alpha I can rent for a few days?” Baekhyun
chuckles. “That’s a contract alpha for me.”
“You’re dumb,” shaking his head, Jongdae looks up at him. “Are you going to do
it? Get a,” he smirks, “contract alpha?”
“Probably. I don’t have any other choice, and I really don’t want to be
infertile.” Perhaps this is the time to ask Jongdae about his own first heat.
“Can you tell me how it was for you?”
“I guess.” Voice thin, Jongdae lowers his face, toying with the hem of his
shirt. “It happened last year.”
“Did you have an alpha?”
Jongdae shakes his head. “I took the shot. My alpha dad said they got me a
private health insurance as soon as I was born. They had my omega dad take some
tests to know if I was an omega, and started planning soon as they had the
confirmation.”
“So… You can take the alpha shot if you have a private insurance?”
“It depends, I think. In my case, the insurance covered only that one shot, for
my first heat. My dads paid it for years, every month. Some people pay more
money so they can have the shot every time they go into heat.”
That’s interesting. It’s a policy that he really can’t see being taught in
schools. This sort of information is obtained through research, and since
Baekhyun never worried much about his first heat, he is now completely
ignorant.
“If you got sick would this private insurance cover the costs of your
treatment?” Baekhyun asks.
“Oh no, that was only for the shot. I think it’s cheaper that way, if you pay
the insurance instead of paying directly for the thing.”
Ok. Yes, it makes sense. It makes him wonder, though, how would the caregivers
at an orphanage handle a first heat situation. The Home Baekhyun grew up in was
a home for younger boys. After reaching teenagehood, they’re transferred to
another facility. Perhaps in this facility, where they’re prone to dealing with
first heats more often, there’s an actual protocol.
“And…” he starts. “Did you feel different after? Your body is supposed to
change.”
Jongdae shrugs. “I felt the same. I mean, I’m just hornier than before.”
“How spaced are your cycles?”
“Three months apart? You’re kind of lucky you’re a late bloomer. If no one
warned you about this stuff before and you’d gone through your heat earlier
without the hormones, you could have gone infertile.”
He’s right. Despite knowing the consequences of going through first heat
without alpha hormones, Baekhyun’s plan kind of forced him into neglecting
other important areas of his life.
“Anyway, don’t waste any more time and apply for a heat carer. Maybe you’ll get
a big, muscular alpha daddy.”
“Jongdae!” Baekhyun slaps Jongdae’s head.
When he gets to his dorm room later that night from his part time job, Baekhyun
goes on an internet search. He feels that his knowledge on first heat and heat
cycles is too scarce, the words printed in his 6th grade book a distant memory.
He wants to know more about himself.
However, the link that catches his attention is entitled “Research shows that
30% of omegas raised in orphanages are infertile”, and not at all contains the
scientific information he was after.
It’s an article disclosing information about a research carried out somewhere
in the Americas in which the researchers visited eighteen Homes for teenagers.
According to the article, the omegas who live in these facilities are often
neglected heat assistance, from orientation to the moment of their first heat.
Dr. Patel, the researcher in charge, says that more often than not omegas will
just receive care from any alpha available. ’They don’t really have a choice.
And when they do, they choose to not have anyone helping them’. The results
show that 30% of the omegas interviewed have chosen not to receive alpha care
during their first heat. From the 70% that have received assistance, 58% did
not receive it from professional hands, which should have been an option in the
event of these omegas not having someone of their own to assist.
Dr. Patel’s team believes it’s worrying that young omegas dive blindfolded into
such an important moment of their lives. They criticize the facilities that
will not provide the omegas with professional heat caring and just allow any
alpha -- sometimes a complete stranger -- to partake in these intimacies.
’We question the true motives of the people in charge of these facilities. It
seems as if they treat these omegas as their property’.
Baekhyun gapes at his phone, eyes unfocused, mind reeling away. So. This kind
of answers his doubts on the first heat protocol adopted by orphanages.
That sounds terrifying. Somehow it doesn’t feel right for him to feel lucky
right now, but he feels lucky. He’s lucky the place he’s lived in was not one
of those places, he’s lucky whoever gave birth to him decided to drop him off
there, he’s lucky the caregivers he grew up with were good people, he’s
freaking lucky. Despite everything, Baekhyun is lucky. And outraged.
How the fuck people expect omegas to know their own nature if no one cares to
educate them? Why the fuck do they think it’s alright to treat omegas like
this, how scared these teenagers must be, how confused--
This is unfair. It’s unfair for them to not be given a choice, it’s unfair that
the alternative is so awful that they’d rather be infertile.
An article related to the one Baekhyun just read reports Omega Rights
organizations speaking up against the orphanages participating in Dr. Patel’s
research. They claim that the research shows articulated criminal behavior, and
demand that authorities do something about it. These organizations are asking
for donations to provide omegas from orphanages in the Americas with
professional heat caring. A link to a website where people can contribute with
donations is provided.
Baekhyun doesn’t have much money to spare, but he makes sure to visit the
website and transfer a small amount. Unlike most of the omegas interviewed by
Dr. Patel, Baekhyun has a choice. He’s thankful for everything he’s
accomplished so far, and he can’t stand knowing that there are omegas younger
than him going through this without any help.
After his nerves have calmed, he inspects the three pamphlets Ms. Kang gave
him. The first one is from a clinic called ProHeat. According to the
informative, ProHeat offers doctors, counselors and fertility specialists to
omegas who are having trouble reaching their first heat. On the pamphlet
Baekhyun learns that to have access to a heat carer, the omega needs to go
through a series of tests to make sure their body is ready to go through the
changes of first heat.
The second pamphlet introduces an omega care center called Safe Cycle. Safe
Cycle’s purpose is providing lone omegas with heat carers. The procedure to
request one includes an online application form, followed by an interview.
Apparently he would be able to choose his heat carer from a catalogue. Besides
offering heat care services, Safe Cycle also tends to medical emergencies. The
pamphlet shows a team of smiling, clean doctors with the words: Committed to
your care 24 hours a day.
The last is from 44 Health Center. Both omegas with trouble reaching their
first heat and having problems with their cycle can procure specialists and
treatments. 44 Health Center provides heat carers after an interview with an
officer. If the need rises, the omega can also be tested for fertility problems
within the cost of the heat care program. 44 Health Center also offers free
tests and appointments with specialists on Omega Rights Holiday.
After consideration, Baekhyun decides to apply with Safe Cycle (it’s the
cheapest option, and Baekhyun’s pitiful job at the juice bar doesn’t pay much).
He fills out the form on their website and turns his computer off. Grabbing his
toiletries, he leaves his room and heads to the bathroom for a shower.
He’s soaping himself when the thought of Zhang Yixing being a good solution for
his alpha problems strikes him. Yixing is the nicest, smartest, most
considerate alpha Baekhyun knows. Mature enough not to engage in silly food
wars with the other alphas and really, really hot. Yixing is an exchange
student, meaning he also lives in the dorm building. It would make things
pretty easy… Baekhyun shakes his head. There’s no way Yixing would want to have
sex with him. (He certainly wouldn’t have the guts to ask.)
Pushing the thoughts of his impending first heat aside, Baekhyun wraps up his
shower and returns to his room.
                                      {x}
He was never told the name of his parents. Some children had met theirs, having
become orphans after unfortunate fatalities, but Baekhyun never knew who gave
birth to him. He has no recollection of a time before the Children’s Home.
Baekhyun’s first memory is of watching the stars shimmer across the sky while
laying in the courtyard at the orphanage he grew up in. He doesn’t know how old
he was -- two, maybe three -- but he remembers feeling happy. He was happy
during the years he lived at the Jung-Kim Children’s Home.
Many kids like Baekhyun, who had never met their parents, used to fantasize
about being adopted, about having a family. Baekhyun remembers going on outings
with the caregivers and observing parents and their children. He was never
jealous. Baekhyun wanted. He wanted it so much, and for a while, he thought
adoption was the only way to belong to a family like the ones they saw. Every
time he would not get picked to spend the day with nice couples looking for a
child, Baekhyun would lose his faith a little bit.
It was one caregivers who told him that was not the only way. ‘You can build a
family of your own in the future.’ Yoona had wiped his tears and crouched down
to his level. Baekhyun remembers the scent of her cologne so clearly. ‘You will
have your own children one day. They will be sweet, and beautiful just like
you.’
As Baekhyun got older, he began to comprehend how it would be possible to
achieve that. First, he needed ‘to be someone’. The caregivers would always
tell them they needed to focus on ‘being someone’, because that was the key to
having a good future. Baekhyun took that to heart, even though it had taken him
a while to understand what exactly ‘being someone’ meant. Being an orphan
shouldn’t stop them from succeeding in life. If there was no one looking out
for him, he needed to look out for himself. It was all on him. He had to create
his own opportunities.
So the first step of his master plan was to be someone. After gaining control
of his life, Baekhyun would be ready to start living the life he’s always
wanted to live.
From that point on, Baekhyun stopped crying about what he didn’t have, and
started focusing on achieving it. He would meet someone, fall in love, and have
children. But first, he had to be someone.
Children were relocated from Jung-Kim Children’s Home to another facility
destined for teenagers around middle school age. Baekhyun’s teachers at the
orphanage thought it could be a good opportunity to apply for the fostering
program: A government initiative that allows orphans to be taken in by
educational institutions. The officers at the orphanage arranged for him to
visit the schools he could apply to. Baekhyun was completely taken. Living
within the school grounds wouldn’t be much different from living at the
orphanage, but having such wide curriculum of options and clubs he could enroll
in -- Astronomy Club! Baekhyun could be a part of the Astronomy Club! -
- sounded pretty amazing. So he applied and was accepted in the program.
As the social worker from the orphanage explained to him, the school would be
responsible for him from that moment on, and would provide him with all the
assistance he needed. The sleeping arrangements were the same as the orphanage
-- the children slept together in a wide room filled with beds and bunks. There
were supervisors taking care of them, and the kids were not allowed to bring
candy into the room.
It was only when Baekhyun moved to high school that he got his own room and was
able to do what he pleased without having to respond to anyone.
The fostering program granted a small allowance, but as Baekhyun got older he
felt the need of having his own money. Work at the juice bar was horrible, his
coworker Soojung was nearly a decorative feature of the place leaving all the
work for Baekhyun, but it’s close to his dorm building and sometimes he could
study and finish homework during his break.
Going to Seoul National on a full scholarship would prove right everything the
caregivers at the orphanage told him, make every single all-nighter he pulled
studying for tests and developing projects actually count. There’s nothing he
wants as much as this.
While his friends spent the whole year fussing about the CSATs, Baekhyun was
awfully confident about it. He never worried about the college entrance exams,
he knew his biggest trial wouldn’t be the test.
The scholarship selections are held before the entrance exams’ results. The
potential candidates for a scholarship are evaluated through their school
history (sent with the application) and the interview. Baekhyun’s had his
interview a few weeks before the CSATs, and it’s been a complete success. The
letter from Seoul National arrived the next week. ‘In hopes that you might
achieve satisfactory results at the CSAT, we are excited to accept you in our
scholarship program’, it said.
He’d been saving money all senior year. Baekhyun knew that going to college
meant leaving his job at the juice bar, and finding work some place else could
take a while. He was ready anyway. Everything was going exactly as planned.
Baekhyun was getting even closer to completing the first step of his master
plan, to becoming someone, and he couldn’t wait.
                                      {x}
“Fucking Jongdae. Fucking fucker.”
It’s late and freaking cold. Baekhyun didn’t take extra money with him when he
left the dorm building to venture through the night towards Jongdae’s house.
Stupid decision. He could have taken another bus to shorten his walk, but of
course he’s a cheapskate. When sick Jongdae asked him to bring his homework,
Baekhyun readily agreed like a good friend. Shouldn’t have been so eager to
help. Kyungsoo would have been a better option, Kyungsoo’s mother has a car.
Kyungsoo could come and go without dreading a stabbing or being assaulted.
You’d think that a Friday night would see the streets booming with life. So
far, Baekhyun’s only company has been a sad fly that circled him for a while
but quickly lost interest.
Baekhyun could at least have been smart enough to wear a hoodie with his
sweater. He could at least have used a scent masker, what was he thinking?
Leaving the dorm room so late without a scent masker? Why did he insist on
taking the damn homework tonight? Why didn’t he think like a human being and
waited to visit Jongdae in the morning?
He’s cursing Jongdae (and himself) for the tenth time when something hits him.
Not something. Someone. Someone’s chest, to be precise. Letting out an ‘oof!’,
Baekhyun stumbles back, arms flailing trying to find balance, and suddenly
there’s a hand on his lower back.
“Wow!” someone says, and Baekhyun looks up to meet a pair of strong eyebrows
and a pointy chin. In his distraction, Baekhyun just bumped into a man. Not
just a man. A very tall, very blond and very much alpha man. The very tall,
very blond and very much alpha man looks down at him with inquisitive, almost
amused eyes.
This man is so handsome he could be classified as a work of art. His face has
the most interesting features, sharp jaws and blond hair styled away from his
face. He’s got a pretty nice forehead. And it looks smooth, too.
Baekhyun is nearly reaching for the alpha’s smooth-looking forehead when
realization sinks into him that this is a stranger, and that said stranger has
a hand comfortably settled on Baekhyun’s lower back. Wriggling away from the
man, Baekhyun frowns, and the alpha’s hand lifts from him. Analyzing the
situation, he concludes that the man probably came from the side street.
“Sorry.”
“I was distracted,” the man says, and the same wind that makes his styled hair
flutter blows his scent right into Baekhyun’s nose. It’s such a strong scent
that for a brief moment Baekhyun’s mind goes dazed. Had Baekhyun ever
experienced a scent this powerful? It probably means that this man is older
than him. Definitely stronger. “You should be careful, little omega.”
It takes him a while to break away from the confusion provoked by the alpha’s
scent. What. Did this dude call him? Baekhyun blushes so furiously that his
whole face burns with shame and his ears tingle. He gapes at the man, trying to
fight back the blush. “You’re the one who shouldn’t go inappropriately touching
people you don’t know.”
The blond alpha widens his eyes and takes a step back. “You were going to fall,
I helped you.” He watches Baekhyun for a few moments, then folds his arms on
his chest. “Besides, it’s late. I don’t think you should be wandering on your
own at this hour.”
Baekhyun glares at him, patting non-existent dust from his clothes just to give
himself something to distract himself with. The way this man looks at him makes
him nervous. And his scent. His scent keeps attacking Baekhyun, hitting him
right in the face as if it expects Baekhyun to do something about it.
“I’ll be fine,” he takes a deep breath and faces the man, those incredible
eyebrows frowning down at him. “Will you please move out of the way?”
“I…” the man clears his throat. “I don’t think it’s safe for you to walk alone.
See, your scent… Is really strong.” The alpha blinks quickly. He looks like
he’s trying really hard not to pass out. Or yawn.
The man is not moving. He simply stands there chewing on his lower lip, his
nostrils flaring and the tap-tap-tap of his feet against the ground sounding
oddly unnerving. Baekhyun’s stomach twists.
“Can you please get out of my way?” He asks politely, however, his heart beats
so fast that it wouldn’t surprise him if this man can hear it.
The alpha sighs. “Listen, I can’t let you go in this state. Your scent is
really strong, you smell like you’re about to go into heat. Do you realize how
dangerous it is for you to walk alone?”
Each breath he takes is a new dose of the alpha’s scent, and Baekhyun is
sweating. There’s something slightly baffling about having this stranger
mention his heat. “Please, let me pass.”
“It’s too dangerous for you to walk alone, little omega. I can accompany you.”
Feeling like he’s out of breath, he glares at the alpha. Baekhyun’s face heats
up at the nickname. “Don’t call me that.” He feels so hot… His whole body is
pulsating. His breath is coming out ragged and this alpha’s scent is not
helping.
“Sorry,” the alpha says, hooded eyes looking down at Baekhyun as if he’s
feeling just as hot, as if his mind is spinning just as quickly. “I…” He
inhales. “Just don’t think it’s safe for you to wander alone. Trust me, I work
with omegas on a daily basis, and your scent is strong.”
Why is he so certain about Baekhyun’s scent? If it was as strong as he says it
is, one of his classmates would have said something, wouldn’t they? Wouldn’t
any of the customers at the juice bar have remarked on it? Soojung would never
have passed up on an opportunity to humiliate Baekhyun in front of the
customers. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, my scent is fine!”
Swallowing, staring at the man and hoping that the fact that his skin is itchy
is well concealed, Baekhyun says, “Get out of my way.”
“Okay,” the blond alpha says. “I’ll just discreetly follow you so no one will
mess with you. Or you could let me rub my scent on you.” The nerve! Baekhyun’s
mouth is halfway open for an angry retort when the alpha raises his hands. “I
don’t mean to offend you, I’m sorry!”
“I wouldn’t let you touch me, you pervert!” he accuses, taking a good two steps
back and yelping as his back hits the wall. Great. Now he’s backed himself into
a corner and it’s like from this side, the alpha’s scent is even thicker.
Baekhyun’s stomach is wildly somersaulting and it feels like there’s nothing he
can do to make it stop.
Somehow, the idea of having this alpha rub his scent on him does confusing
things to his insides. He’s so, so, so hot. Practically melting.
“Alright, it doesn’t have to be me!” the man says hurriedly. “You can call
someone and I’ll stay with you till they get here. ”
It’s stronger. Why is his scent getting stronger… “If you just let me pass--”
“Hey, is everything alright here?” An unfamiliar voice asks. Baekhyun turns his
head in the direction of the sound and finds a woman.
It’s an alpha. An alpha woman wearing a dressing gown, coming out from an
apartment building. She looks older than the blond jerk, and her scent is
powerful, soothing. It’s strange that Baekhyun’s never seen this woman before,
but he feels like he can rest assured. Perhaps because she came out of the only
building that’s decorated for Christmas. Someone who decorates for Christmas
this early must be nice.
“Is this guy bothering you?” she asks Baekhyun.
Baekhyun and the blond alpha say “Yes!” and “No!” at the same time.
“I was just trying to convince this little omega to not walk alone!” Blond
Alpha says like it’s absurd that Baekhyun is even questioning his motives. “Can
you smell him? He’s alpha bait!”
“Don’t call me little omega!”
“His heat will come soon, and you know as well as I do that some alphas will
see him walking alone in this state as an invitation.”
“Like you?” Baekhyun rasps, folding his arms on his chest. “I’m just trying to
get to my friend’s house and this asshole keeps calling me little omega!”
The alpha woman squints at them and takes a step closer in Baekhyun’s
direction, lifting her chin and sniffing. “He’s not going on heat anytime
soon.”
“See!” Baekhyun exclaims. “He won’t let me go!”
“But the asshole is right,” she says. “It’s not safe for you to walk alone at
such an hour.”
“That’s what I was saying!” the alpha shouts. When the woman shoots him an icy
glare, it’s with mild satisfaction that Baekhyun watches him recoil.
“Can’t you see the situation you’ve created here?” She pokes a finger at his
chest, and Blond Alpha winces, his eyes lowered. “Don’t go around approaching
omegas like that. You scared the boy, you dimwit.”
“Can you at least accompany him?” Blond Alpha asks with a sigh.
“I don’t need a chaperone.” Seriously, this is getting tiring. Baekhyun would
slap this man’s face if he didn’t think this could end badly for him. Also,
he’s got a feeling that getting into direct contact with Blond Alpha won’t do
his prickly skin or his heartbeat any good.
“Wait here, I’ll get my coat.” The alpha woman says and shoots Blond Alpha with
a glare. “And you should take off.”
She walks into the apartment building, but her scent stays. Baekhyun avoids
looking at Blond Alpha, but he can tell the man is watching him.
“Don’t go out by yourself again, please,” the alpha says. Baekhyun ignores him.
“My name is Yifan, by the way.”
“I don’t care,” Baekhyun answers just in time for the alpha lady to come out,
wrapped in a trench coat. She mutters ‘let’s go’, and Baekhyun follows her,
leaving Blond Alpha behind. It’s only when they have walked for a few minutes
that Baekhyun actually breathes. He feels like the whole time he was close to
that alpha, he was breathing toxic air. He closes his eyes, filling his lungs
with oxygen at full capacity.
“How old are you, kid?” she asks, lighting a cigarette. Baekhyun shoves his
hands into his pockets.
“Eighteen,” he says.
She snorts, shaking her head like she disapproves of the information. “Your
scent is currently shifting, and that’s a characteristic of omegas about to go
into heat. That’s probably why that asshole mentioned it, although I don’t
think you’re at risk of peaking at any moment. It’s close, but not that close.
Shouldn’t be out by yourself this late, still.”
“I know. My friend is sick. He needed his homework.” Baekhyun tries to justify,
walking a little faster to keep up with her strides. Funny, she should be
catching up with him, since he’s leading the way.
“You couldn’t ask your parents to come with you?”
Swallowing, Baekhyun blinks up at her. “I don’t have any parents.”
The woman looks down at him before lifting her face and blowing smoke. “Sorry,
kid.”
“It’s ok, I never met them. What’s your name?”
“Hyojin,” she says.
“I’m Baekhyun.”
They make light conversation all the way to Jongdae’s house, and when Hyojin
asks if Baekhyun wants her to take him back, he thanks her and says he’ll spend
the night. Hyojin only leaves after Jongdae’s answered the door and ushered
Baekhyun upstairs.
“You owe me big time,” Baekhyun tells him, flopping on Jongdae’s bed. “I was
nearly mauled by an alpha on my way here.”
Jongdae’s eyes widen comically. “Seriously? What happened?”
“I was distracted and bumped into him,” he pouts. “He kept calling me ‘little
omega’ and refused to let me go.”
Smirking, Jongdae gets closer, “Is that so?”
“His scent… Was really strong.” Baekhyun touches a palm to his heated cheek.
“I’ve never felt scent that strong before. He kept saying my scent was also
strong… Except I can’t see how it’s possible.”
Jongdae hums, tapping his chin. “If his scent was strong to you, and your scent
was strong to him, it’s pretty obvious you’re attracted to each other.”
Baekhyun blushes harder. Albeit finding it pretty inconvenient in this
situation, he’s has read something about it. Still, Baekhyun adds with a weak
voice, “Shut up. He was an asshole.”
“How did you escape from his claws?”
“Another alpha appeared and scared him off. She brought me here.”
“Dude. Why didn’t you ask anyone from the dorm to come with you?” Jongdae asks.
“That alpha, Zhang Yixing, he lives on your floor doesn’t he?”
He snorts. That’s just like Baekhyun, asking for an alpha to escort him across
town. “I have my two feet, they work perfectly fine without help. Besides,
people have their own agenda, it’s not like Yixing just sits around waiting for
a summons.”
“He’s nice enough that he’d actually come with you if you’d asked him.” Jongdae
snuffs, looking apologetic. His runny nose and red cheeks make him look extra
pitiful. “Sorry.”
Baekhyun nudges his side gently. “Don’t worry, I made it in one piece, didn’t
I? The good thing is that now I’ll get to spend the night, because there’s no
way I’m going back tonight.”
 
Breakfast at Jongdae’s place is great. There is lots of fruit and yoghurt, at
least two kinds of juice and the softest pancakes. His parents are pretty funny
and always make Baekhyun feel at home. Jongdae’s family, in Baekhyun’s view, is
the perfect family. He often takes his time watching his friend’s dads and
amazing in how kind they are to each other, how considerate. They function so
well, there never seems to be a problem that can’t be solved in Jongdae’s home.
That… is exactly what he wants. Baekhyun wants his future to have a little bit
of what they have.
 
Usually on Saturdays Baekhyun does laundry. There are only three washing
machines in the dorm’s laundry room, so if he wants to avoid spending his
weekend holding a basket of his dirty clothes and waiting for his turn, he
should wake up early. At 10 AM he’s the fourth in line. Not fun.
“Hey, Baekhyun,” says Yixing, approaching him.
“Oh hi,” Baekhyun replies.
“I’m third,” Yixing informs him holding up his little ticket, the number 3
written in thick black marker. “Do you want to put your stuff in with mine? I
don’t have much today, I took care of most of it on Tuesday night.”
“Ah, should I?” He looks down at his basket. “I have about ten pieces here. And
the occasional sock.”
Laughing, Yixing tugs at the sleeve of his shirt. “Come on, most of these
people have at least thirty.”
Feeling immensely grateful, Baekhyun smiles at Yixing. What a great alpha. The
greatest. Why couldn’t the rest of the alphas in his class be this nice? Maybe
this is due to Yixing’s Chinese blood. Maybe all Chinese alphas are nice.
“So, you missed dinner last night.” Yixing mentions.
“Yeah, I ate at the bar. Jongdae’s sick and I had to take him his homework
after work,” he explains. Yixing frowns.
“Last night?”
Baekhyun hums, and Yixing frowns deeper. “You went by yourself?”
Not this again. “I know it was a bad idea, everyone scolded me like a thousand
times already.” He rolls his eyes. “It was fine. There was a douche alpha, but
I made it in one piece.”
“A douche alpha?”
The memory of Blond Alpha’s strong scent is still vivid in his memory. Baekhyun
says, “This alpha kept being a jerk, but a lady came up and told him off. She
accompanied me to Jongdae’s place.”
Yixing looks genuinely worried, and Baekhyun feels a pang of guilt. “Next time
you need to go out at night, knock on my door. I’m not that far, you know.”
Sighing, Baekhyun stretches his lips in a lazy smile. “Why are you so nice,
Zhang Yixing?”
Yixing laughs, eyeing Baekhyun with purpose. “I’m not going to spoil you of all
the fun of finding out yourself.”
Because of Yixing’s generosity, Baekhyun finishes his clothes faster than
expected, winning some extra time before he has to deal with his homework. He
checks his e-mail for notifications from the online war game he’s been lousily
playing, but instead, finds a new message from Safe Cycle - Omega Care Center.
 
From: Safe Cycle - Omega Care Center (no-reply@safecycle.com)
To: Byun Baekhyun (bbyun02@gmail.com)
Subject: Appointment date and additional information
Mr. Byun,
Your application for our heat care services has been received and evaluated.
Below you will find the details pertinent to your scheduled appointment for an
interview. Do have in mind that this message does not guarantee you a heat
carer.
Please refer to the PDF file attached for all details on your appointment.
Regards,
Safe Cycle Omega Care Center
xxxxxxxxxx
Seoul, South Korea
 
The pdf file attached to the email contains Baekhyun’s personal information and
the date of his appointment. Damn, it’s on a weekday afternoon. He’s going to
have to ask Jinki to cover his shift at the bar. Besides the date and time of
his appointment, the file instructs him to ask for someone called Lee Jimin at
the reception. The location is not far from campus. Baekhyun’s supposed to
cover the distance with only one subway ticket.
He only hopes the information from the pamphlet is correct and that the prices
at Safe Cycle are indeed reasonable. Baekhyun can’t afford an alpha that costs
more than his phone bill.
                                      {x}
From: Jongdae
do you have your alpha daddy?
Baekhyun snorts.
To: Jongdae
I’m not there yet, Jongdae.
He will be there very soon, according to his navigator app. The walk from the
subway station to the omega care center is not long, and he’s pretty sure the
building is somewhere between that ice cream parlor and the… Ah! There it is.
From: Jongdae
k keep me updated n send pics!!!
Pushing the door open, Baekhyun walks into Safe Cycle. The walls are a smooth
tone of blue and there are pictures of waterfalls and calm rivers. It would be
pretty dull if it wasn’t for the Christmas tree blinking faintly on a corner.
There is a waiting area and different kinds of plants. Baekhyun walks straight
to the reception counter, tapping at his phone in search of that PDF file. What
was the name of the person he’s supposed to see?
“Um, hi,” he says, quickly looking at the receptionist sitting behind the
counter before getting back to his phone.
“How can I help you?” the man asks.
“I have an appointment with… Lee Jimin?”
Baekhyun thinks the receptionist asks for his ID, but his request is muffled by
a curious voice that says, “You?” Out of sheer reflex, Baekhyun looks up.
There, standing right next to the receptionist holding a bunch of blue files
and wearing a white coat, is Blond Alpha. Squinting, mouth curling in a
surprised smile. Baekhyun’s first thought is to call the police (this man could
be a stalker! He did say he would follow Baekhyun!), but then he takes in the
blue files he’s carrying, and the top one has the Safe Cycle logo on the cover,
which makes him suspect that all the other ones also have the logo. A stranger
wouldn’t be walking around carrying those. He also notices that Blond Alpha is
wearing a white coat, signifying that he’s either a doctor or a really creepy
and realistic cosplayer. The worst part is that Baekhyun is pretty sure Blond
Alpha works at this very omega care center.
The one place Baekhyun can afford.
While Baekhyun is assessing the situation, Blond Alpha -- he is horrified to
remember that the man is called ‘Yifan’ -- takes the opportunity to say, “The
little omega,” and he sounds astonished.
Warmth spreads throughout his body, and he slips into a frown. “Please do not
call me little omega,” he says gently, despite his face telling a completely
different story.
Blond Alpha’s smile drops, and he clears his throat. “Right. Sorry.” Yifan
opens a drawer at the counter and dumps all the files in there. From his
peripheral vision, Baekhyun can see the receptionist gape in disbelief. Yifan
then turns to the other man and points down at the files, “New test results.”
“Yes.” The receptionist’s eyes nearly pierce holes onto his face. Baekhyun
would be very pleased to see it happen.
Humming, the alpha looks at Baekhyun once again, daring to circle the counter
to get closer. “Do you have an appointment with Jimin?”
As if Baekhyun would answer him. Turning back to the receptionist, he hands his
ID. The man smiles at him, taking his time to glare at Yifan once more. “Have a
seat, please.”
Baekhyun does so, avoiding Yifan’s eyes. Should he be surprised that the alpha
follows him?
“Did you get to your destination safely?” he asks Baekhyun.
Crossing his arms on his chest, Baekhyun scowls. Blond Alpha just keeps
talking.
“I know we’re not supposed to treat omegas as if you can’t take care of
yourselves, but I’ve seen alphas acting dumb before.” He can’t get a hint.
Baekhyun is glaring at him, a clear indication that he. Does. Not. Want. To.
Talk. Yet, this alpha won’t shut up.
Sighing heavily, Baekhyun looks away. He’ll just ignore him harder.
There’s silence for a moment. Baekhyun knows Blond Alpha is still standing in
front of him because his shadow looms over.
“Okay. I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable that day, that was not my intention.
And I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable now,” the man says. “I’ll leave you
alone.” He waits for a response from Baekhyun and gets none. Finally. The air
was starting to get a little dense and his scent was starting to escape from
the confines of his masker. Baekhyun stares after him, watching him disappear
behind a door with a large “Only authorized personnel” sign.
The receptionist calls him to discuss payment methods, seeing that the costs
are not covered by the National Health Insurance. Baekhyun knew that, the
pamphlets were very clear. He pays cash, receives a receipt, and is directed to
Lee Jimin’s office after retrieving his ID.
Baekhyun’s first impression of Lee Jimin is that she wears a lot of orange. Her
computer case is orange, the notepad on her desk is orange, all her pencils are
orange. The cardigan she’s wearing is peach (that’s also a shade of orange.)
“Mr. Byun, please have a seat,” her thin, delicate voice says. Baekhyun notices
that her eyeshadow is orange. “Your purpose for procuring heat care is that you
don’t have an alpha for your first heat?”
“That is correct.” Baekhyun clears his throat, blushing a little. He’s quite
used to having random people poke and prod at private details of his life, but
it never ceases to embarrass him.
Lee Jimin nods, looking at her computer, the clicking of her mouse filling the
silence in the office. “And you don’t have an alpha that you trust?”
Honestly, all this information went into his application form. Is it really
necessary that he repeats himself? “Yes.”
“Your authorization was signed by Kang Soojin and Kim Soohyun. Do you know
them?”
Ah, Ms. Kang and principal Kim. “Yes.”
“Alright.” Lee Jimin looks satisfied with what she sees on her computer screen,
settling back on her chair. “Mr. Byun, have you ever had a sexual encounter?
Arching his eyebrows, Baekhyun blinks in confusion. “No? I wouldn’t be here if
I had. Having intercourse with an alpha triggers an omega’s first heat even if
it’s not the time.” Said omega will have a painstakingly long heat as their
body changes slower than usual. Baekhyun wouldn’t want to experience a whole
month in heat.
“Yes, having sex with an alpha will trigger first heat. However, dalliances
with beta and omega friends won’t have the same effect.” Her tone is gentle,
like she wants him to feel safe to share.
“No, I never had sex.” He’s… There was… Something with a beta in freshman year.
Things did not go that far.
“Have you ever taken fertility tests?”
“No.”
“Do you masturbate frequently?”
Lee Jimin is staring at him like she doesn’t want to miss the moment his face
turns impossibly red. “A few times a week.”
“Ok, Mr. Byun,” she smiles. “We need to run a blood test to know where you
stand. We can’t give you an exact date, but the test can help us identify when
your heat will most likely strike.” She leads him towards the door, carrying
one of those blue files. “The test results will be out in a few days, we will
automatically schedule a new appointment for you. It might take a while,
though. Depending on your results we can settle for choosing a heat carer,
alright?”
“All good.” The pamphlet wasn’t very clear about the procedure, he realizes. It
sounded so simple, like plucking an apple from a tree.
“Good. Come on, I’ll show you the way.”
Lee Jimin knocks on a door down the hall and pushes it open, dragging Baekhyun
along. She places the blue file on a table near the supplies and smiles at him.
“The technician will be here shortly. See you soon, Mr. Byun.”
After she leaves, Baekhyun inspects the room. It’s not very large, only a few
chairs and a table with supplies occupying the space. He takes a seat.
He hears the door opening and turns around to face the technician. Looking down
at him is none other than Blond Alpha himself.
“Before you ask, I’m not stalking you. This is my job, I run the lab here,” he
explains, hanging by the door.
Embroidered on the man’s lab coat are the words: Wu Yifan, lab technician. He
watches Baekhyun expectantly.
Is it safe to be in such a tiny room with a dude who tried to corner him?
Someone whose scent had Baekhyun’s mind swirling? Should he trust him? Should
Baekhyun allow this person to poke a hole in his arm?
“I don’t want you to think I’ll use this as an opportunity to grope you.” Yifan
continues. “So… Um. I’ll… I’ll call for someone else.”
Yes. That would be good. Although Baekhyun will return for at least two more
appointments and the chances of casually running into Yifan in the hallways of
Safe Cycle are too high. His stomach irrationally clenches at the idea of
bumping into Yifan, having Yifan’s arms wrapping around his waist to steady
him…
“Can I ask you a question?” the alpha breaks his musings, and Baekhyun blushes
at being caught fantasizing. Yifan doesn’t really wait for his response, and
asks, “That day… Did you feel something? Something unfamiliar. Something that
you’ve never felt before?”
Yes. Nothing he felt that night was familiar, and the fact that Yifan is asking
him about it like he had an unusual reaction to Baekhyun himself makes the
omega’s heart beat faster.
Swallowing, Baekhyun averts his eyes from Yifan’s, focusing on his chin, his
throat, the pocket of his coat. “I...” he what? What would he say?
Yifan nods quickly, as if wanting to prevent Baekhyun from answering. “The
technician will be right with you.” And leaves.
Baekhyun stares at the closed door for what feels like ages. The new technician
arrives and introduces herself as Kim Bomi. Her touch is light, Baekhyun barely
feels the needle. He wonders if Yifan’s fingers would feel as light as Bomi’s.
He ponders if he would react to Yifan’s touch on his bare skin the same way he
reacted to the man’s scent.
                                      {x}
Kyungsoo is trying to study. He glares at both Jongdae and Baekhyun as they
whisper, stealing glances at the librarian. She’s already reprimanded them
twice.
“He’s a doctor?” Jongdae asks.
Baekhyun shakes his head. “A technician. He runs the lab at the center. He
would collect my blood samples, but he stepped away and called for someone
else. I was surprised, didn’t think he was capable of reason.”
“That’s uncanny,” Jongdae marvels. “What are the odds of someone you met on the
street actually have a role in your life?”
Gaping, Baekhyun nudges Jongdae and says, appalled, “He doesn’t have a role in
my life.”
“He works at the daddy alpha center, of course he has a role in your life.
Kyungsoo, tell him the street alpha has a role in his life.”
“The only thing I’m telling both of you is to shut up. This is a library, not a
saloon.”
Baekhyun pouts at him, “You could at least offer some advice. What should I do?
Should I keep ignoring whatever weird sensations I have when I’m around him?
Should I mention these weird sensations? He asked me, you know. If I had felt,”
he makes quotation marks in the air, “something different.”
“What I think is that you’re wasting your money on that omega center. This dude
sounds like he would jump you on command,” Jongdae says, flipping one of the
Biology books on the table open.
Blushing, Baekhyun blinks rapidly. “That’s not the point.”
“No, that’s not the point.” Kyungsoo cuts in, dropping his pen and sighing as
if discussing the subject is burdensome. “The point is that evidence shows that
it’s possible that you’re mutually attracted because of the reactions you’ve
had to each other. This can lead to bigger things.”
“What are you trying to say?” Jongdae asks.
“That Baekhyun should definitely look into that. Did you know that omegas about
to go into heat can get scent claimed by an alpha? Any alpha, even a passing
soul on the street. It happens if the couple recognize each other as potential
mates, and it’s pretty rare, so it might not be what’s happening to you, but
it’s still worth investigating.”
An omega close to heat? Scent claimed? By any alpha? Baekhyun’s chest
constricts, and he touches his neck, having a weird feeling, like invisible
teeth are trying to bite into him. Hyojin, the nice alpha lady, said just a
week ago that he wasn’t about to go into heat. Baekhyun couldn’t have been
scent claimed.
“Listen,” Kyungsoo says, reading from a thin book entitled ‘Mating habits and
the physiology of cycles.’ “Page 57 says that common symptoms of this sort of
unannounced scent marking for both omegas and alphas are ‘consistent sexual
anticipation and the feeling of being void of something they can’t identify.’
Is that how you’re feeling?”
“Not exactly,” Baekhyun answers honestly. “I feel hot. All over. And my stomach
is weird, and my heart beats faster. My skin itches sometimes, too.”
Kyungsoo nods, closing the book. “Then yeah. That’s a pretty regular case of
the hots. You want into his pants.”
“Ha!” Jongdae exclaims, and the librarian glares at them once more.
“Since Baekhyun’s issue is settled, I’d like to mention that I decided to stop
hiding from Chanyeol.” Kyungsoo announces, casually picking up his pencil and
going back to writing like the information he just tossed at them is not a big
deal. Jongdae and Baekhyun share a glance.
“You mean you’re going to date him?” Baekhyun asks carefully, adding, “And my
issue is not settled, we’re getting back to that.”
“Yes, it’s settled. You might be attracted to this dude, but it doesn’t mean
you have to do something about it. If he’s an asshole it doesn’t matter how hot
he is. Just tell him off,” Kyungsoo answers. “And no, I’m not going to date
Chanyeol. Yet. But it’s pointless to pretend that we both don’t want each
other.”
He then shoots a pointed look at Baekhyun. “I don’t know if you should ignore
whatever you’re feeling, Baek. You don’t know this guy. If there’s a chance
that you’ll see him again, try to check if he’s the kind of person you’d want
to be around. If he’s not, just forget about it and keep living your life as
always.”
 
After his classes, Baekhyun drags his ass to work, regretting his life choices.
He wishes he’d been smart enough to take up that spot at the bookstore a few
minutes away from campus. The juice bar is closer to his dorm, but he’s pretty
sure he wouldn’t have such an awful work environment in a bookstore. Baekhyun
hates his job. Not because there’s too much work at the juice bar, the work is
not the problem. It’s his coworker. If it was up to Soojung, people would never
get their juice. Baekhyun glares at his coworker as she blows at her recently
manicured nails. Honestly. Baekhyun uses his break to take care of personal
business, but to Soojung every hour is her break hour. Their manager, Jinki, is
always so smitten with her that he never takes her behavior into consideration,
and Baekhyun is the one doing her work.
He charges one dude for an apple juice and moves to prepare two orange and
lemon juices. The bar is busy today, but it only feels so because he’s the only
one working. A woman walks up to Soojung trying to order, but Soojung directs
her to Baekhyun. Snorting in disbelief, Baekhyun asks the customer to sit while
he finishes up and he’ll be right there to take her order. She smiles at him,
shooting Soojung with a pitiful look before walking away.
This is too much. Baekhyun would quit if he could. He really would quit.
He’s wiping sweat from his forehead when Yixing walks into the bar. Baekhyun
wants to return Yixing’s pretty smile, but all he manages is a scowl, returning
to his previous spot behind the counter where he can deal with all the orders
he’s just taken.
“Baekhyun?” Yixing follows him, taking up a seat at the counter. “Are you ok?”
“No,” he says honestly, moving about his business. “I’ve been working like
crazy all week just so beauty queen over there can rest her ass.”
His voice was loud enough for Soojung to hear him. “Why don’t you shut up and
keep working?”
Baekhyun’s blood boils with rage, and he slams a knife down on the sink. A few
customers startle, looking in their direction before deciding it was nothing
and returning to their conversations. Yixing looks worried.
“Hey, have you taken your break today?” Yixing asks.
“No.” He couldn’t because Jinki was busy in the storage room and Soojung was
painting her fucking nails.
“Then come outside for a minute.” Yixing touches his wrist, trying to convince
him. “We’ll go for a quick walk, I can even buy you an ice cream to cheer you
up.”
Inhaling, Baekhyun shakes his head feeling utterly defeated. He could quit. He
really could quit. “I can’t leave, she won’t move a finger.”
“Why don’t you let her worry about it?” Yixing lightly pulls at his wrist
again. “Come on.”
After Baekhyun notifies Jinki that he’s taking his break, they go for a walk
around the block. Yixing buys them ice cream and talks to Baekhyun about the
book he’s been reading. Eventually, the conversation flows back to what
happened at the store. Yixing listens to him patiently, offering some advice,
and Baekhyun marvels at how nice he is. It not news that Zhang Yixing is a good
guy, but every time they interact, Baekhyun is even more amazed.
“Why are you so nice?” He smiles at Yixing.
The alpha’s cheeks turn pink, but he doesn’t avert his eyes. “I already told
you that’s for you to figure out.”
The way Yixing smiles at Baekhyun suggests that there’s some deeper meaning
behind his words. Baekhyun is curious. “Are you nice to all omegas?”
“Yes,” Yixing answers, reaching for a strand of Baekhyun’s hair, a
contemplative look in his eyes. There’s something different in the air, how
Yixing touches his hair and runs his eyes all over Baekhyun’s face. “But to
some people I’m even nicer.”
“You can get even nicer?” He feigns surprise, gasping. It draws a chuckle out
of Yixing, the alpha’s hand dropping from Baekhyun’s hair.
“To you? As nice as you want me to be.”
Baekhyun squints, his lips quirking up. Ok, that’s definitely flirtatious.
Baekhyun doesn’t have that much experience on the matter, but he can surely
tell when someone is flirting. Maybe that’s Yixing’s thing. Maybe he flirts a
lot. That would explain his actions. Or. He could be interested. Romantically
interested.
He can’t muster a reply, just smiles at Yixing, feeling the need to hide. Too
good to mock him, Yixing just touches his wrist, leading the way back to the
juice bar.
                                      {x}
“So, Baekhyun.” Ms. Kang sighs, resting her entwined fingers on the desk. “I
see you followed my advice on the omega care centers.”
Baekhyun squints at her. Not that he’s not glad that her summons kept him away
from work this afternoon, but the personal subjects still make him
uncomfortable.
“Yes.” Baekhyun answers.
“The document we received explained that if you are willing to proceed with the
heat care assistance, you’re supposed to take some tests and undergo
evaluation.”
“I’m expecting an email about my next appointment, I already took the test.”
Ms. Kang hums. “That’s good. And how do you feel? Have you been feeling on
edge? Do you think your heat is close?”
Baekhyun feels his cheeks tingle. He clears his throat. “I,” he shifts on his
seat, “I feel fine.” Except for the fact that he met an alpha and is now
suffering from a horrible case of attraction. Should he mention Yifan?
“Ok, good. We’ll be notified again once you choose a heat carer, and you’ll
need our authorization. We’ll have to review the alpha’s profile, but you
should be good.” She smiles. Baekhyun grimaces as he thinks of Ms. Kang and the
principal knowing exactly what alpha will get to fuck Baekhyun’s first heat out
of him. Awesome.
                                      {x}
The email with Baekhyun’s next appointment date arrives on the next Monday.
He’ll need to be absent from work again on Wednesday. Great, it’s been
unbearable to work next to Soojung anyway. Everyday Baekhyun is one step closer
to reaching his limit.
On Wednesday, Baekhyun makes sure to wear as much scent masker as he can,
showering even his hair in the lotion. He picks his outfit carefully,
convincing himself that he’s doing so in favor of his evaluation. The bus ride
to Safe Cycle is quiet, he listens to music and thinks about the pile of
homework demanding his attention back at his dorm.
The receptionist is the same at the last time, and he smiles at Baekhyun when
the omega hands in his ID.
“Please wait, she will be right with you,” the man says, and Baekhyun sits.
While he waits, he feels restless. Anxious. Like he’s waiting for something, as
if Lee Jimin comes too soon he will miss his chance at Something. He stretches
his neck, trying to look past the walls, which is ridiculous. Lee Jimin comes
for him, and Baekhyun follows her with disappointment settling low in his
stomach.
Her office is as orange as he remembers, her voice as thin.
“We have your results, Mr. Byun,” she announces, opening a blue file. The same
type Yifan was carrying the first time Baekhyun was here. “Your hormone levels
are fine. Your heat will probably strike in 2 months and a few weeks. We can’t
say when, as I’d explained to you previously, but you can organize your life
around this information.”
Humming, Baekhyun swallows. “So… What now?”
Lee Jimin grins. “Now you have the ok to choose a heat carer! Please keep in
mind that they won’t be available to you every time you go into heat. Most
people have heat cycles about three months apart. That gives you plenty of time
to decide how you’d like to handle your next heat. If by any chance you decide
to have a heat carer again, another fee will be charged, but you won’t need to
go through any more tests.”
So much protocol. Baekhyun really lacks the patience. Lee Jimin is waiting for
a signal that he understands the conditions, and Baekhyun nods. She seems
satisfied, standing up and ushering him through the door, chirping about
someone called Youngwoon who’s responsible for scheduling his heat carer.
“Here, Mr. Byun.” Lee Jimin knocks on a door situated near her office.
Baekhyun’s stomach flutters when Yifan opens the door.
“Yifan!” Lee Jimin sounds surprised. “What are you doing here?”
“Youngwoon is on his lunch break,” the alpha explains, his eyes on Baekhyun. “I
was taking care of his appointments.”
Baekhyun’s skin is already feeling warm, and he inhales, trying to gather some
control. He can’t smell Yifan, he’s probably wearing a masker. He won’t be
affected by his scent.
“But,” Yifan swallows, blinking at Baekhyun before looking at Lee Jimin. “I can
call for someone else to take this one.”
Disappointment settles low on Baekhyun’s stomach. Which is, again, ridiculous,
because he should be relieved that the Blond Alpha doesn’t want to be near him.
Does he want to be near Yifan, then?
Lee Jimin makes a sound. When Baekhyun averts his eyes from Yifan’s smooth-
looking forehead, he sees that she’s frowning. “You can’t see to Mr. Byun?”
Something in Yifan’s eyes change, and his cheeks tinge with the faintest color.
His lips part, and out of his mouth comes a slightly amazed, “Mr… Byun?”
He’s not exactly sure what makes him do it, but Baekhyun blurts, “It’s
Baekhyun.”
Yifan gazes at him, parted lips hinting at a smile. “Baekhyun.” Is that
reverence in his tone? He sounds genuinely surprised to be learning Baekhyun’s
name. Which probably means he didn’t look into Baekhyun’s file. The realization
is… Comforting.
“Very well.” Lee Jimin touches Baekhyun’s back, and the omega startles and
shivers. “Oh my!” she chuckles. “I’m sorry. Go with Yifan, dear, he will show
you the catalogue. Good luck!”
Baekhyun is not looking when Lee Jimin turns on her heels and marches back into
her office. His eyes are focused on the alpha in front of him, who’s not
wearing his lab coat today, only a white button down with his white pants,
unstyled hair strands falling on his smooth-looking forehead. Baekhyun doesn’t
think he’s ever seen anyone this gorgeous.
“Come on in, Baekhyun,” Yifan says, voice low. Hearing his name in Yifan’s
voice does something weird to his stomach. Baekhyun licks his lips (so dry!)
and follows him inside. The room is small, only a table and two chairs. Behind
the table is a short bookcase filled with fat files. Yifan indicates Baekhyun a
chair to sit on, and he does so, watching the alpha circle the table and get
one of those files. The other chair is situated across from Baekhyun, on the
other side of the table. Yifan is supposed to sit there.
Instead, the alpha drags the chair around the table, placing it right next to
Baekhyun’s.
“Do you mind me sitting here?” he asks, but it’s pretty clear that he’s not
intending to sit anywhere else. Baekhyun’s throat feels too tight. He shakes
his head anyway. “Alright then, this is the catalogue of heat carers available
to you. Choose one of these alphas.”
He hands Baekhyun the fat file. Baekhyun opens it, and the first profile he
looks at is of a man called Lee Jihyuk. Jihyuk is 23 years old and was born in
Daegu. His pictures show a big, muscular guy with a slightly brown skin.
Jihyuk’s hair is short, and he looks like the kind of guy who could give an
omega a great time. Baekhyun thinks about those thick arms wrapped around him,
those strong knees spreading his legs apart…
Yifan clears his throat, and Baekhyun looks up, meeting the alpha’s eyes. He
has an uncertain look on his face.
“Do you like him? He’s a top seller,” Yifan points out, and Baekhyun thinks he
hears anxiousness in his voice.
“Yes, I like him,” Baekhyun dares to say, holding Yifan’s gaze before looking
back down at the catalogue on his lap.
The second is a woman, Park Sanja. She looks nice, her hair has blue tips.
Baekhyun passes her profile. He passes a few more female profiles (not that
he’s not into alpha girls, but… He likes alpha guys more).
Kim Minseok’s profile is promising. 26 years old, born in Gyeonggi. According
to his description, Kim Minseok likes to dance, and is into games and reading.
Minseok is not as large as Jihyuk, but his body is perfect. He’s bulky in all
the right places and he surely looks like he could carry Baekhyun around.
Licking his lips, Baekhyun runs the tips of his fingers across Minseok’s
pictures, wondering if this could be his alpha.
Baekhyun keeps browsing, but none of the following profiles are as interesting
as Lee Jihyuk or Kim Minseok.
“Do you have your pick?” Yifan asks. The tap-tap-tap of his feet on the floor
is familiar to Baekhyun’s ears. Frowning, he turns to face the alpha.
“I’m not in a hurry. If you are, you can leave. I’ll call for someone when I’m
ready.”
Sighing, Yifan looks away from him, adjusting in his seat and leaning forward,
resting his forearms on his thighs. When his eyes meet Baekhyun again, there’s
a darkness to them that makes Baekhyun’s stomach clench.
“Are you wearing a scent masker?” he asks. Baekhyun can’t see how that
information is relevant to the moment, but nods anyway. “I can still smell you
underneath it all. It’s too strong. The way you smell.”
Heat rises to Baekhyun’s cheeks, and he averts his eyes, blinking down at the
catalogue. “You’re the only one who says that.”
From his peripheral vision, Baekhyun can see Yifan straighten himself, and lean
closer to him. “Maybe your scent is only strong to me.”
That’s when Baekhyun makes the mistake of eye contact. They’re too close. He
gasps, not expecting to find Yifan so close. The alpha comes even closer,
sitting on the edge of his chair, his eyes dropping from Baekhyun’s eyes to his
mouth, and Baekhyun unconsciously bites on his lower lip. Yifan swallows, the
bob of his throat making Baekhyun want to lick it. He really, really wants to
lick it.
Baekhyun’s heart is beating so fast that he’s pretty sure Yifan can hear it,
but his heart rate is the last thing on his mind when the alpha’s thumb is
running across Baekhyun’s mouth. Shit, this is too much. Baekhyun’s pants are
too tight on his crotch, and he’s feeling out of breath.
A knock on the door startles them away from each other. Baekhyun’s hand flies
to his heart in a weak attempt to soothe it, coax it to go slower. Yifan’s eyes
are still on him even when the unknown woman informs them that there is a new
customer wishing to take a look at the catalogues.
The next few minutes pass in a haze. Baekhyun chooses Kim Minseok, and Yifan
schedules Baekhyun’s heat carer.
When Baekhyun is about to leave the room, Yifan says, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t
have touched you, I…” The alpha runs both hands through his blond strands,
looking genuinely messed up. “I don’t know why I keep acting like that around
you. It’s like my hands, my mouth, my mind… They’re not mine anymore.”
Baekhyun’s heart is going to jump out of his mouth, he’s pretty sure he’ll
spontaneously combust if he doesn’t leave immediately. Yifan is still watching
him hopefully, and Baekhyun doesn’t know what to do, or say. So he just leaves.
He exits the building in a hurry, tripping over his own feet on the sidewalk.
His heart still hasn’t gone back to normal when he boards the train.
                                      {x}
The first time Baekhyun was kissed involved a beta named Joonmyun and rain.
Joonmyun was one year above Baekhyun, and was the first person he met when he
moved to high school. Joonmyun took an instant liking to him, clearing all
Baekhyun’s doubts about the institution and telling off alphas who would try to
bully him. In a way, it was because of Joonmyun that he met Jongdae.
“You dating the golden boy?” The lazy-looking boy leaning against the wall had
asked one day after Joonmyun walked Baekhyun to class. It had become a regular
thing for Joonmyun to walk Baekhyun to class. At first Baekhyun really didn’t
know where the classes were held, but weeks after his first day he didn’t fear
getting lost anymore. He just really liked Joonmyun’s company.
Jongdae’s question startled Baekhyun. He croaked, “What?”
Pointing his chin towards the direction Joonmyun had just walked, Jongdae said,
“Kim Joonmyun. Honor student, rich boy. You’re always with him.”
Baekhyun stared at Jongdae before walking into class. He intended to ignore the
question, but would soon learn how persistent Kim Jongdae actually is.
“He seems to like you,” Jongdae said following Baekhyun into the room.
Flopping down on his seat, Baekhyun stopped and evaluated Jongdae’s statement.
Joonmyun was a nice guy. He was always offering help and smiling at Baekhyun in
that cute way that made the corner of his eyes crease. Baekhyun liked
Joonmyun’s smile. He also liked how he seemed to care about Baekhyun even
though they’d known each other only for a couple weeks.
“I like him,” Baekhyun said, watching Jongdae’s eyebrows shoot up and his lips
stretch in a kittenish smile. “He’s nice.”
He kept hanging out with Joonmyun (and Jongdae, who latched onto Baekhyun with
no intentions of ever letting go), and soon, Baekhyun could tell that things
had changed. He began noticing the way Joonmyun’s fingers would brush over
Baekhyun’s when they were walking, or how Joonmyun would always swipe
Baekhyun’s bangs away from his eyes when they were too long. The way Joonmyun
would intently watch Baekhyun when he was telling a story as if it was the most
fascinating thing anyone could ever say. He liked it. Baekhyun liked having
Joonmyun’s hand on his neck. He liked knowing that Joonmyun would be waiting
for him after classes so he could walk Baekhyun back to his dorm room, he liked
having Joonmyun’s eyes on him and knowing that the beta was kind of infatuated.
He liked it.
One night they all went to a soccer game together. Jongdae insisted (he was
always fond of alphas’ thighs). After the game, the students got together to
celebrate. It wasn’t the kind of gathering Baekhyun would attend, but Joonmyun
would be there. While Jongdae fooled around with the whole soccer team,
Baekhyun sat with Joonmyun on the ground and talked. They just talked about
anything and everything, and felt blissful.
It started to rain at some point. Most people had whined about the rain killing
the bonfire, but Baekhyun couldn’t care less about it. He felt too good to be
brought down by a bonfire. He didn’t know if it was the rain, or the fact that
Joonmyun was there, or that Baekhyun was feeling light like he’d never felt
before that made him stand up and stretch his arms open, rain pouring onto his
skin.
Baekhyun heard Joonmyun call out his name. Baekhyun was laughing when he turned
around to face Joonmyun, the beta looking at him with heavy eyes. Baekhyun’s
heart rate increased when Joonmyun brushed wet strands away from Baekhyun’s
forehead, his hand lowering to Baekhyun’s neck.
It happened so naturally. Their lips met, and Baekhyun placed his hands on
Joonmyun’s shoulders. He had nice shoulders. Joonmyun caressed his cheek, and
touched his neck, and it all felt so nice. His lips were soft, moving against
Baekhyun’s with so much care. That was his first kiss. With Kim Joonmyun.
During a high school party, near a dead bonfire, under the rain. In that
moment, he thought that maybe that whole master plan was bullshit. Maybe he
didn’t have to wait to get a boyfriend.
After that night by the bonfire, Joonmyun was a lot more touchy. He didn’t seem
to be able to keep his hands off Baekhyun (or his mouth, for that matter), and
Baekhyun liked it. He liked kissing in the locker room, and he liked the way
Joonmyun’s mouth on his neck made his whole body tingle. He liked Joonmyun.
Weeks had passed before Baekhyun began questioning his choices. For a moment,
Joonmyun’s whole ‘niceness’ managed to make him forget his priorities. Baekhyun
had a plan, and a goal. He wasn’t supposed to have someone like Joonmyun before
‘becoming someone’. He needed to graduate and go to college first, that was the
plan. But Joonmyun… He was just… So nice. So nice that Baekhyun would gladly
forsake his homework in favor of kissing (kissing was also really, really
nice). As a result, his grades started to waver. And Joonmyun, an honor
student, got called to the counsellor’s office to answer why the clubs he
presided over were being neglected.
All those nice things… Kissing, and cuddling, and being close to each other…
All those things came with a price, Baekhyun learned. As much as he liked
Joonmyun, as much as he could see someone just like Joonmyun belonging next to
him, it wasn’t the time to belong to someone just yet.
Baekhyun had nothing. He didn’t have a safety net underneath him ready to
support his fall. He couldn’t afford to fall.
It took him a while, but Joonmyun eventually got over Baekhyun. They remained
friends though, and Baekhyun sometimes visits Joonmyun at Yonsei.
Joonmyun was the only one who came close enough to twisting Baekhyun’s ideas,
to making him question if his whole plan was actually worth it. If things have
gone any farther, he could have fallen in love with that boy.
Baekhyun wonders, now, laying on his bed and hugging his fluffiest pillow, if
he’s any closer to it. To falling in love. There’s an order in which he expects
things to happen in his life, but he can’t help but wondering. What kind of
person he’ll fall in love with? Will they be smart and kind like Joonmyun? Will
they be witty and friendly like Jongdae? Perhaps quiet like Kyungsoo. They can
be nice and warm like Yixing.
To you? As nice as you want me to be. Yixing’s words replay in his mind, and
Baekhyun hugs his pillow tighter.
Or.
They could be forward and steaming hot like the blond alpha he met on the
street.
Yifan.
Yifan who spins his mind out of focus. Yifan whose scent is so strong it makes
Baekhyun dizzy. Yifan who makes Baekhyun’s insides turn into jelly. Baekhyun
knows nothing about Yifan. Is it fair that his body gets all sorts of reactions
from someone he doesn’t know as opposed to someone like Yixing, who is too nice
for his own good and pretty obviously interested in Baekhyun?
He can’t understand. If he prays on it, will he get a straight answer?
They will probably meet again. Perhaps in the next meeting, Baekhyun will be
able to test Kyungsoo’s theory and finally discover if the feelings he’s having
are really related to attraction.
                                      {x}
Casting a look at Chanyeol’s overflowing lunch tray, Baekhyun glances down at
his own lunch. It appears sadly empty. The alpha is already eating before he
even takes a seat at their cafeteria table. A peek at Jongdae says that
Baekhyun is not the only one surprised by the amount of food Chanyeol seems
committed to ingest.
He wouldn’t be sitting at their table if this was a regular day. On a regular
day, he would sit with his dumb friends and make eyes at Kyungsoo from a
distance. However, today Kyungsoo accepted eating lunch together, conveying
that they would all have to bear with Chanyeol’s presence at their table.
Jongdae even tried to argue with their beta friend, urging him to go eat with
Chanyeol at a separate table by themselves. Kyungsoo’s eyes got wider than
saucers at the idea, resulting in Chanyeol’s knee nudging Jongdae aside so he
could sit by Kyungsoo’s side. Jongdae simply moved to sit by Baekhyun’s side,
across from them.
“So,” Jongdae says after a few minutes of awkward silence. “Are you going on a
date?”
Chanyeol smiles, teeth so white it nearly blinded Baekhyun. “I hope so.” He
gazes at Kyungsoo, a lovestruck look on his face. “I’d like to take him to this
nice place in the university area.”
“Hongdae?” Baekhyun asks. Some places in that area won’t allow people younger
than 19 years old in.
“Yeah,” Chanyeol replies. “They have the best barbecue ever.”
So not a bar then. Baekhyun will see hell freeze over before Kyungsoo goes to a
bar with an alpha. “Soo? Are you saying yes?”
The beta frowns slightly. Baekhyun is pretty sure that Kyungsoo is more
inclined to accepting going on a date than refusing. His words the other day at
the library made it perfectly clear that he’s done running away from Chanyeol,
and even if he’s never told the alpha himself, Kyungsoo appreciates Chanyeol’s
advances.
“He is, isn’t he?” Jongdae pushes.
Kyungsoo sips at his juice. Glances at Baekhyun and Jongdae, then looks up at
Chanyeol who’s even closer now than before. “I’ll come… If Baekhyun and Jongdae
can come too.”
Ha. Naturally. Kyungsoo could go to a bar with an alpha, if it’s not just the
two of them. The fact that he’s inclined to go out with Chanyeol accompanied by
his friends already shows a huge amount of trust. It might take a while before
he concedes going out just the two of them.
Chanyeol looks bummed at Kyungsoo’s imposition, but nods nevertheless. “Deal.
Can we go this weekend?
Lucky for them, Baekhyun doesn’t have to work on weekends. “Fine by me.”
Jongdae shrugs. “Me too.”
Beaming, Chanyeol pops a grape into his mouth. “It’s a date.”
                                      {x}
One of the things Baekhyun wanted most when he was a kid was to have a best
friend. He loved the concept of having someone he could unconditionally trust,
someone to be there for, someone to hold hands with. Not that Baekhyun didn’t
have any friends at the orphanage, he just never connected with any of them the
way he connects with Jongdae and Kyungsoo.
Although Baekhyun is radiant about having not one but two best friends, he
never thought that being someone’s best friend would result in skipping class
to watch the out-of-service bathroom door on the third floor so his friend
could hook up with some dude.
At the moment, Baekhyun sits on the door, right in front of the door, tapping
angrily on his phone. Loyalty, Baekhyun, one of the counselors who assisted him
in middle school used to say. Never forget where your loyalties are. Well,
being a loyal friend apparently means skipping two periods of English class.
And he’s not even having any fun.
Jongdae, though, is having a lot of fun. Sometimes Baekhyun can hear him moan
as the alpha in there does stuff Baekhyun doesn’t want to think about. Baekhyun
has no idea who that alpha is, but Jongdae probably does. Jongdae has an
uncanny talent for finding stray alphas and adopting them.
Skipping class and doing nothing wouldn’t bother him (Baekhyun really is a
loyal friend) if, after nearly two hours of looking out, he didn’t start
feeling weird. Like… Turned on weird. He starts to sweat, and the tips of his
fingers slide wet across the screen of his phone. His stomach won’t stop
turning, and his breathing is starting to get strange.
Baekhyun is almost sure he’s not having a reaction to anyone’s scent. Both
Jongdae and the alpha were careful enough to dampen their scents in masker to
avoid being caught in action by a faculty member. What could be the source of
his impromptu horniness? That never happened before, Baekhyun has witnessed
Jongdae getting personal with many alphas (and the occasional betas), and never
before had such a reaction.
In there, the alpha’s voice says, “You want it, don’t you? Don’t you? Tell me
you want it,” and Baekhyun literally moans at the sounds Jongdae is making.
It’s freaking embarrassing, because this is his best friend, and he’s so close
to getting off to their making out sounds.
Baekhyun swallows, his throat tight, his hands itching to drop to his crotch,
to massage the hardness trapped inside his pants. What if he starts touching
himself and a professor walks by? Or worse: what if an alpha student walks by?
Baekhyun will never live it down.
Fucking Jongdae. This is all his fault. Baekhyun had an easy life back at the
orphanage when he had no best friends. Perhaps he should finish the school year
as a lone wolf.
The alpha groans and Jongdae whimpers. Baekhyun swallows, his breath short.
Fine, this might not be entirely Jongdae’s fault. Baekhyun’s been having
thoughts. They’re most likely to hit him at night, but these days, he’s been
catching himself deviating during class or in the middle of preparing a
watermelon juice. Maybe… Maybe it’s his heat, maybe it’s too close. He’s been
so horny lately. Even the dumbass alphas from his class are inspiring
erections, and Baekhyun ends up having to wrap his jacket around his hips to
avoid flashing a boner in public.
It’s kind of embarrassing to admit, but Baekhyun thinks he might need to make
out with someone.
He shares his thoughts with his friends when they’re watching the soccer team
practice later.
“I can introduce you to some nice guys!” Jongdae chirps, too excited with the
idea of finding Baekhyun a hookup.
Wincing, Baekhyun slaps his head. “I don’t want to kiss someone you’ve kissed
before.”
“I haven’t kissed every single person in the campus,” his friend retorts.
“Yet.” Kyungsoo says. Baekhyun didn’t even think he was paying attention.
Kyungsoo’s eyes are glued to the field where Chanyeol is running around. He’s
probably disappointed because it’s too cold for the athletes to wear tight
shorts and sleeveless shirts.
Jongdae snorts, “Fine, just keep jerking off in your bed like a sad old man.”
“Everyone jerks off in their own bed.” Baekhyun sure does, the bathroom in the
dorm building is not exactly a private place.
“Have you considered this unexpected horniness to have a connection with that
alpha you met?” Kyungsoo asks. He’s still watching the field, a small smile on
his lips.
Blinking, Baekhyun opens his mouth, but makes no sound. He doesn’t know how to
respond to that because he hadn’t considered it. Yifan? Yifan’s been making him
horny? Can he do that from a distance?
“I can hear the cogs in your brain working too hard.” Kyungsoo rolls his eyes,
finally looking away from Chanyeol to focus on Baekhyun. “I thought you said he
gave you a hard on the other day with the mouth touching, neck sniffing--”
“He didn’t sniff my neck!”
“--and that you would have kissed if that woman hadn’t interrupted you.
Baekhyun,” the beta stares at him with severe eyes, “he’s probably making you
horny.”
Alright. He might be right. Baekhyun knows he’s attracted to Yifan, he feels it
in his bones.
Kyungsoo continues, “If you’re still unsure about how to proceed, take your
time, you don’t have to act on it, but Baek...” Baekhyun looks up. “Having
stomach curls and heightened heartbeats? Blushing when you look at someone,
wanting to kiss and make out? That’s what attraction feels like.”
                                      {x}
Baekhyun is pretty sure that if not for Chanyeol, they would be completely
lost. The place the alpha’s chosen for his date with Kyungsoo is in Hongdae,
right in the university area. Baekhyun’s never been here at night before, and
now it appears to have been a poor decision. The streets are packed with
interesting people, a mix of scents and different smells -- food, alcohol,
smoke.
The restaurant Chanyeol takes them is called Beale St, and serves mainly
American cuisine. The smell of roast pork is to die for, Baekhyun’s mouth is
watering before they’re shown to their table. The whole establishment is
decorated for Christmas, snowflakes hanging from the ceiling and candy canes on
the walls, giving a very cheerful vibe.
As they wait for the food to arrive, Baekhyun watches Chanyeol and Kyungsoo
interact. They look even more intimate than before, Chanyeol’s arm draped
around the back of Kyungsoo’s chair, Kyungsoo’s smiles directed at him.
Baekhyun is pretty sure he’s never seen Kyungsoo smile so much. He wonders if
his and Jongdae’s presence was really necessary when they have it all covered.
Trying to give them some privacy, Baekhyun engages Jongdae in conversation. He
mentions Yixing, and their walk during his work break.
“Look, Yixing is pretty reserved. If he’s being forward with you it’s because
he wants you,” Jongdae says, toying with a salt container.
Jongdae is explaining how much of a prude Baekhyun is when something odd
happens. Baekhyun picks up a scent amid all the mix and food smell. He looks
up, searching around the restaurant, trying to find where the scent is coming
fr--
Oh. This must be a joke. Some divine figure is playing with Baekhyun’s life.
There’s no other explanation as to why Wu Yifan, the blond alpha, is making his
way into the Baele St with a group of people.
“Baek, are you listening to me?” Jongdae touches his arm, but Baekhyun is too
intent in watching Wu Yifan waltz in, his blond hair styled as the night
Baekhyun met him on the street, a black button down snug against his chest. He
looks too fucking good, and his scent is so strong that it’s literally wafting
towards Baekhyun. His stomach somersaults, and Baekhyun clears his throat,
discreetly fanning himself in a pathetic attempt to alleviate the burn on his
cheeks. Baekhyun feels hot. Why is he so hot?
As if he’s heard someone call his name, Yifan snaps his head to Baekhyun’s
exact spot, meeting his eyes. It’s like he knew where Baekhyun was sitting. His
eyebrows arch, lips slowly parting in clear surprise. His friends move on to
find themselves a table and Yifan remains still, eyes glued to Baekhyun. He
doesn’t move to approach Baekhyun though, just stays there. Motionless.
Watching Baekhyun as if he’s a vision.
“Yifan!” It’s Chanyeol who calls, and Baekhyun blinks out of his trance,
staring at the alpha sitting at his table. Chanyeol is smiling, quickly
standing up to wave Yifan over. “Yifan hyung!” He looks down at Kyungsoo and
explains, “He went to school with my sister.”
Yifan responds to Chanyeol, waving back and hesitating, casting Baekhyun
another glance before walking over. “Hi, Chanyeol. Damn, you’re tall.”
Chanyeol hugs Yifan like he’s a long lost brother. “Not taller than you, hyung.
Are you here on your own?”
“Nah, I came with friends. We’re going to hit some bars later, but Luhan wanted
to eat here first.” He tells Chanyeol but his eyes are on Baekhyun. “Hello.”
“Hi,” Baekhyun says.
Chanyeol, Jongdae and Kyungsoo look from Baekhyun to Yifan.
“Do you know each other?” Chanyeol asks. Baekhyun doesn’t even know how to
answer.
“It’s,” Yifan licks his lips, and Baekhyun feels like he’s being burned alive,
“complicated.”
Chanyeol’s eyes widen, his eyebrows shoot up and a smirk appears in his mouth.
Baekhyun knows how that sounded, and he’s well aware of what Chanyeol is
thinking. “It’s not like that,” he says.
Humming, Chanyeol taps Yifan’s shoulder. “I don’t want to keep you, hyung.”
This time, Yifan actually looks at Chanyeol. “Great seeing you, Chanyeol. Tell
Yoora I said hi.” He looks at Baekhyun one more time before smiling at Kyungsoo
and Jongdae, and going to meet his friends. Their table is right on Baekhyun’s
field of vision. He takes a deep breath, attempting to soothe the fire inside
him. What the fuck is wrong with him? He lowers his head and takes a sip of the
water a waiter placed in front of him earlier but the will to lift his face and
watch Yifan is powerful. What. The fuck. Is wrong. With him? The way he felt
just now could have had him begging Yifan to come closer, to breathe on
Baekhyun’s neck, to let Baekhyun bathe in his marvellous scent. Is he in heat?
Is this what heat feels like? It doesn’t quite match the descriptions, but...
“I don’t feel very well.” Baekhyun confesses to the glass of water. He knows
all eyes are on him, and that his friends are repeatedly asking him if he’s ok.
He’s not. There’s something wrong with his organs, with his stomach. It won’t
stop jumping. It’s got to be Yifan’s scent. He’s probably not wearing a scent
masker. That’s the only explanation.
“Do you want us to call someone?” Jongdae asks, his palm rubbing Baekhyun’s
back.
“Drink some more water,” Kyungsoo suggests.
“He must be hungry,” Chanyeol concludes.
Baekhyun can’t say if what he’s feeling can be treated with food or water. He
doesn’t know what it is, he’s never felt it before. He didn’t feel it when he
bumped into Yifan, and he certainly didn’t feel it during his appointments at
Safe Cycle. He’s had stomach curls and heightened heart beats just as
Kyungsoo’s described, but this is different. This is nothing like before.
Baekhyun felt like the only thing pinning him down and stopping him from
jumping Yifan was the alpha’s own eyes on him. Yifan’s stare kept him in place.
“I’ll be fine,” he tells them, taking evenly spaced breaths and gulping down
the water. “I’ll feel better once the food is here.”
Chanyeol mutters something like ‘see i told you he was hungry’, and Kyungsoo
turns his attention back on the alpha. Jongdae, though, doesn’t look convinced.
“That’s him, right?” he asks quietly. “The alpha. Yifan.”
Baekhyun faces him, nodding. “It’s so weird, Jongdae.”
“What’s weird?” Kyungsoo asks. Baekhyun looks at him, surprised by his
attention. “Being attracted to him or the fact that everyone in this restaurant
can sense your attraction?”
Chanyeol frowns. “Are you talking about Yifan?” He faces Baekhyun. “How do you
know him?”
“They met on the street,” Kyungsoo explains, looking up at Chanyeol. It’s
ridiculous how pleased the alpha is by such a small moment of Kyungsoo’s
attention. Baekhyun would roll his eyes if he weren’t concerned with his
friend’s choice of words. “Yifan said something about Baekhyun’s scent being
strong and now they can’t stop meeting and Baekhyun is getting hard ons.”
His cheeks burn, and Baekhyun glares at Kyungsoo. “It’s not like that. He works
at the omega care center I’ve been attending.” Not nice to report such an
intimate detail of his life to Chanyeol, but it sounds a little more reasonable
than what Kyungsoo is offering. “We’ve met a couple times.”
“They’re attracted to each other,” Jongdae says. “It’s perfectly normal, but
Baekhyun is acting like this is the end of the world.”
“If you still had any doubts about that alpha liking you, those are gone. He
couldn’t keep his eyes off you,” Kyungsoo says.
“I thought that was strange.” Chanyeol’s frown deepens. “Could he have reacted
to your scent?” Sniffing the air, he shrugs. “I can smell you, but it’s very
mild.”
“Which makes it pretty obvious that you smell stronger for him. Because he
wants you.”
The effect that those words have on Baekhyun’s insides worry him. Licking his
lips, Baekhyun lowers his eyes. They’re right. Baekhyun doesn’t know Yifan but
he knows himself, and he’s sure that he would never feel, on regular days, what
he’s been feeling since he met the alpha on that Friday night.
The food arrives and the awesome flavor of the ribs they ordered distracts him
for a while, his stomach settling. He even manages to ignore Yifan’s scent.
When the food is over and Chanyeol and Kyungsoo are practically on each other’s
laps (“That escalated quickly,” Jongdae mentions), the feeling is back.
Baekhyun’s hand clutches at his belly and he, without thinking, glances at
Yifan’s table.
The alpha has a glass to his lips, sipping. His eyes were on one of his
friends, but as if he’s aware of Baekhyun’s attention, Yifan turns to him. They
maintain eye contact for what seems like ages, but eventually Baekhyun breaks
it, leaning onto Jongdae, resting his head on his friend’s shoulder.
“Okay?” Jongdae asks.
“Yeah.” No it’s not. He’s restless, like he needs to get up and move. “I’m
going to the bathroom.”
He stands up, policing himself not to look at Yifan. Baekhyun enters the
bathroom corridor, but never pushes the door open. He just leans against a
wall, hand still protective on his belly. Yifan’s scent twirls around him, and
Baekhyun closes his eyes.
“We keep meeting like this.” Yifan. Baekhyun is not even surprised that he’s
here. It’s like he was expecting Yifan to come.
Slowly, he opens his eyes, turning to look up at Yifan without pulling his head
away from the wall. The alpha’s eyes slide down to his neck, and he visibly
swallows. Baekhyun licks his lips, feeling parched. “Are you sure you’re not
following me, alpha?”
Yifan’s eyes darken at the name, and he steps closer. “My friends and I are
going out. Explore the city.” Yifan sounds slightly out of breath, but still
flashes a smile. “You could come with us.”
To explore the city? With Yifan and his friends? With the alpha who kept
calling him ‘little omega’? With the alpha who’s looking at him like he could
eat Baekhyun up in one bite? With the alpha who’s been driving Baekhyun
completely crazy? I don’t know you, he wants to say. Stop messing with my mind.
“Come with me,” Yifan whispers. “I promise I’ll behave.”
“I don’t even know you.”
Nodding, Yifan says, “My name is Wu Yifan, I was born in Guangzhou, China. I’m
twenty-three years old and I live in a studio apartment. I don’t have any pets.
I majored from University of Seoul, although I almost ended up in Sogang.
“I want to be near you, I want to know you.” Yifan inhales, his head tipping
back. “You smell so good.”
“I can’t go anywhere,” Baekhyun reasons, forcing himself to move out of Yifan’s
reach, to put some distance between them. “I have l-laundry tomorrow.” It’s a
lie, Baekhyun does laundry on Saturdays.
“I’ll do your laundry myself,” the alpha chuckles. “Just come, please.”
God, Baekhyun wants to touch him. His hand moves onto Yifan’s chest on its own,
and splaying his palm on the alpha’s tight pecs feels so good. Yifan grabs
Baekhyun’s hand, pulling him even closer. There are just a few inches between
them now, and Baekhyun never wanted to kiss someone as much as he wants to kiss
this alpha.
“I can’t go to bars,” Baekhyun tells him. “I’m eighteen.”
Yifan gazes at him for a while, his eyes lowering for a second. He looks taken
aback. “That’s fine, we don’t have to go to bars. I’ll get you back home in one
piece, I promise.”
Damn him, damn this overwhelming lust that is sweeping Baekhyun off his feet,
clouding his mind. He wants so much to go with Yifan, to find out what is
happening between them, what is compelling Baekhyun to act the way he’s acting.
“Baek, we’re leaving.” Jongdae’s voice startles him, and Baekhyun jumps back,
pulling his hand from Yifan’s grip.
“I’ll be right there,” he says, voice shaky. He doesn’t really want to leave.
He wants to stay here, or go explore the city with Yifan and maybe give him one
or two opportunities to really grope him this time.
But in real life, he goes back to his dorm room. In real life he walks away
from the alpha and keeps in mind that it’s not the time. There’s a protocol to
follow, Baekhyun can’t blindly throw himself in the arms of a potential mate.
He’s been there before, with Joonmyun, and it didn’t work very well.
He swallows, avoiding Yifan’s eyes as he turns to walk in Jongdae’s direction.
A hand grabs his elbow, swirling him around, and Baekhyun squeals. He doesn’t
have time to understand what’s going on before Yifan is kissing him, soft lips
pushing against Baekhyun’s. The fire inside him, that for a second seemed
dormant, bursts all over again, and there’s nothing Baekhyun would like more
than to submit to this alpha.
The kiss doesn’t last long. Yifan slowly steps away from Baekhyun, and the
omega makes a pained sound at the loss of contact, biting on his lower lip.
“For you to have something of mine,” the alpha says. Baekhyun’s heart is
beating so fast he’s afraid it might jump out of his chest.
“B-Baek, let’s go.” Jongdae catches Baekhyun’s attention. With one last glance
at Yifan, Baekhyun walks away, allowing Jongdae to drag him out.
Jongdae’s hand is tightly linked to his, like he’s afraid Baekhyun will run
back to Yifan if he’s let free. Truth is that he might. Sounds crazy, but he
might.
“Fuck!” his friend exclaims as they meet Chanyeol and Kyungsoo outside.
“What happened?” Kyungsoo asks.
“Yifan, the alpha, captured Baek in the bathroom and kissed him senseless,”
Jongdae reports excitedly. “You should have seen it, he looked like a manhwa
character. Fuck, Baekhyun, he’s so hot. What is wrong with you?”
The need to defend himself rising, Baekhyun reacts, “What is wrong with me? I
can’t just tackle him to the ground like a dog, Jongdae! We don’t know each
other, this isn’t an everyday thing in my life. I don’t have alphas making me
feel things, so excuse me if I don’t know how to handle this.”
Silence takes over, the sounds from the nearby bars and the chatter of the
people passing by filling the spaces between them. Jongdae stares at him with
one raised eyebrow, as if Baekhyun’s little outburst meant absolutely nothing
to him. Suddenly embarrassed, the omega sighs, folding his arms on his chest.
“Sorry,” he tells Jongdae, his friend approaching him with light steps. “It’s
just… I’m attracted to him. But I might need some time figuring out how to deal
with it.”
Although the thought of being attracted to someone is somewhat unnerving,
Baekhyun can’t deny what just happened. He’s very much attracted to Yifan. So
much that his hands are still a bit shaky.
When the subway arrives, Jongdae touches his neck, leading Baekhyun into the
wagon. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol find their own seats like Baekhyun and Jongdae
were never there.
“You know,” Jongdae says once they’re seated. “You could tell him to leave you
alone if his attention bothers you.”
“It’s weird how I keep meeting him,” Baekhyun confesses, leaning his head on
Jongdae’s shoulder. “Don’t you think it’s weird?”
Maybe it’s Baekhyun’s tone, maybe he sounds unsure enough to make Jongdae sigh
and pet him. “It’s weird. It could be a sign, I don’t know Baek.”
His friend’s fingers thread into his hair. It feels so good that Baekhyun
allows himself to close his eyes. Just for a moment. “I have a plan.”
“A plan?”
“Yeah.” He sighs. “I want a family I can belong to. I want a mate, I want
children. I want to have a house just like yours. When I was young I learned
that someone like me will only get this kind of life if they work hard enough.
So I worked hard. I studied a lot, because I want to be able to provide a good
life to my family. The kind of life I couldn’t have.”
Jongdae listens quietly, the sounds of other people chattering and the train
moving on the trails filling the gaps in Baekhyun’s speech.
“I wasn’t supposed to… Falling in love was supposed to come much later. I
should be able to graduate and go to college and find a job first. But I guess
you can’t predict when it will happen.”
“Was that why you broke up with Joonmyun?” Jongdae asks.
Baekhyun hums. Jongdae’s fingers down to his ear, caressing his lobe. “Joonmyun
was… Perfect. I really liked him.”
“I know you did.”
“But I felt that it was too soon for that. I hadn’t even completed the first
phase of my plan, why was I jumping ahead? Being with him started affecting my
grades… And his as well.”
Jongdae turns to brushing his hair. “Maybe, if you were in love with Joonmyun
you wouldn’t have been able to let him go. But you might, you know? Meet
someone who’ll turn your world upside down.”
“What if it messes everything up? What if--”
“Baek, look at me.” Jongdae leans away from Baekhyun, forcing him to lift his
head from the other’s shoulder and face him. “It’s your plan. You have a goal,
and if you feel that something is getting in the way of that goal, you’ll toss
it aside. But… You got a job before graduation. You got a job because you felt
the need to have a job, and it didn’t ruin your plan. You still rocked that
scholarship interview. Some things won’t get in your way.”
Baekhyun understands what he’s saying. When he was with Joonmyun, he fell head
first into their relationship. Baekhyun let if affect the things that were
important to him. But perhaps he’s able to control it. Perhaps he can deal with
it the same way he’s dealt with having a job: not letting it be the only thing
he should be focusing on. Maybe now that he’s a little older Baekhyun will be
able to find better solutions for these things he can’t predict. Like falling
in love. It shouldn’t be a bad thing, he shouldn’t need to run away from it.
 
 
Baekhyun can’t sleep. He rolls around in bed, fidgeting with his blanket, with
his pillow. He can’t stop thinking about Yifan, his words, Jongdae’s words. It
appears that everyone else has better insight than Baekhyun himself. Maybe he’s
grown to be a dimwit. Baekhyun, smart and dexterous Baekhyun, is actually a
dimwit.
The ping of a new text arriving steals his attention, and Baekhyun reaches for
the phone on his desk.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
Did you like my kiss?
He gasps so loudly that, on reflex, his hand flies to cup his mouth. Baekhyun
sits up and kicks his blanket, suddenly feeling too warm.
To: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
Who’s this?
The reply comes in seconds.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
I asked Chanyeol for your number. I hope you don’t blame him, I really
insisted.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
It’s Yifan, in case you were still wondering.
Baekhyun’s stomach clenches, and he stares at the last text, not a single clue
of how to respond. Yifan is texting him. Yifan. The alpha. The alpha who kissed
him tonight, the alpha he wants so bad.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
It’s ok if you don’t want me to text you, I’ll stop.
Baekhyun blinks down at his phone, momentarily releasing it to turn on the lamp
on his bedside table.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
I can’t stop thinking about you.
Jongdae. Jongdae will know what to do. Baekhyun calls him, his friend’s voice
heavy with sleep when he answers.
“What is it, Baek? It’s late.”
“Yifan is texting me.”
“What?” Now he sounds awake. “Texting you? You gave him your number?”
Baekhyun shakes his head before remembering Jongdae can’t see him. “Chanyeol
did.”
“Oh… What is he saying?”
“He’s asking if I liked the kiss, saying he can’t stop thinking about me,”
Baekhyun says in a whisper. “What should I say?”
Jongdae chuckles, “Wow, he seems pretty committed to the cause. You tell the
truth, Baek. If you’re not comfortable with his texting, ask him to stop. And
chill out. A guy is texting you, it’s not Godzilla.”
Closing his eyes, he inhales. He can deal with this. Baekhyun is not at all a
dimwit, he’s a well versed person and he can deal with crushes and dudes
texting him. “Ok, I’ll talk to him. Thanks, Dae.”
“Alright. If everything goes downhill don’t call me again. Wait to discuss it
in the morning.”
He smiles. “Yes, sir.”
He finishes the call to find two more texts from Yifan.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
I meant what I said earlier. I want to know you.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
I really want to know you
Thinking about what happened tonight, Baekhyun nods to himself, typing an
answer.
To: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
You should wear a scent masker more often
It’s a pretty solid message. Baekhyun is not ignoring him, nor acknowledging
his advances. Chewing on his lower lip, he waits for an answer.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
I will.
He will? Well… That was easy. Baekhyun was honestly expecting a witty remark or
a stupid joke about his scent.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
You too.
Yeah, Baekhyun didn’t think there was a reason to wear a scent masker. He went
out with his friends, it’s usually a safe environment.
To: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
Sorry. I was careless tonight.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
Can I see you again?
He feels his stomach tense for a second, licking his oddly dry lips. He has no
more appointments at Safe Cycle before his heat, they won’t meet at the center.
But does Baekhyun want to meet Yifan?
He should be honest with himself. The semester is almost over, high school is
almost over, the results of the entrance exams will be out in four days. A
little while longer and it’s winter break. Baekhyun’s goals are very close to
his reach. Is it really bad if he wants to meet Yifan again? What damage could
it do to his academic life? To his plan? Agreeing to a meeting doesn’t mean
that he needs to lock himself in a bathroom stall somewhere with Yifan, they
could be friends. That’s it. Friends. They could be friends.
To: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
I could be free to go out with a friend.
The response takes about two minutes to arrive this time.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
When are you free to go out with a friend?
A smile threatens to take over his lips, but Baekhyun bites on them. His only
free time is after eight, when the juice bar is closed. Then he goes back to
his room and works on school projects. Is there a night he can spare this week?
Probably not.
To: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
Saturday afternoon.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
Alright, text me where you want to meet.
From: 111-1111-1111 (Save)
I can keep texting you, right? Now that we’ve decided to be friends.
                                      {x}
Someone knocks on Baekhyun’s door. Strange, none of his friends mentioned
coming over. It must be a neighbor wanting to ask for some detergent. With a
sigh, he abandons his war game and walks over to open the door.
“You’re awake!” Yixing says enthusiastically.
“Of course I’m awake,” he snorts. “Are you here for detergent?”
“Oh, no no. I was wondering if you’d want some popcorn.” Yixing wiggles his
eyebrows like he’s suggesting that Baekhyun join an illegal activity. It makes
him laugh. “I made too much, and you know popcorn. Can’t overnight it. It has
to be eaten while it’s warm and buttery.”
Popcorn… Warm and buttery. Baekhyun’s mouth waters and he hums at Yixing, the
alpha grinning. “Bring your popcorn over.”
While Yixing runs back to his dorm to fetch the popcorn, Baekhyun takes his
time applying scent masker all over himself. He’s not going to risk it, even
though this is Yixing and Baekhyun is a hundred percent certain about him, he’s
still an alpha. And it’s been proved that alphas have an Effect over Baekhyun.
When Yixing returns holding two bowls filled with popcorn, they settle on
Baekhyun’s bed. He worries for a second that Yixing will get his scent all over
the bed. It’s not like many people walk in here anyway.
“So, how was your Saturday?” Yixing asks, stuffing popcorn into his mouth. It
makes his cheeks bloat, and Baekhyun pokes it. “Agh don’t do it!”
Laughing, he runs a hand through his hair. “It was ok. Took care of my laundry
then my homework, studied for a quiz and went out later.”
“Where did you go?” The alpha inquires.
“Jongdae and I were third and fourth wheeling on Kyungsoo and Chanyeol’s date.
Soo didn’t want to go by himself.” He rolls his eyes.
“Oh! They’re dating now? I heard Chanyeol was really invested.”
“They’re getting along,” Baekhyun nods, eating some more popcorn. “Kyungsoo was
hesitant at first, but Chanyeol won him over, I think.”
“Good for them.” Yixing chews, eyes on Baekhyun. “It’s good to have someone.”
He hums, averting his eyes. He doesn’t have much to add to the subject.
“What about you?” Yixing asks, and Baekhyun lifts his face to look at him. “Do
you have anyone?”
Frowning, Baekhyun tilts his head. “Why do you ask?”
“It’s just…” Yixing shrugs, looking down at the bowl on his lap. “You smelled
faintly of alpha when you opened the door.”
Going rigid, Baekhyun feels a squeeze in his chest. He smelled of alpha? Could
that be… “Isn’t it Chanyeol’s smell?” He brings his own arm to his nose.
“No, I know Chanyeol’s scent.” Yixing’s eyes search him, blinking. “You don’t
have to tell me, Baekhyun. I’m just being nosy. I’d just like to know if
there’s anyone.”
So he can take his team off the field? Baekhyun nods, rubbing his clean palm on
his cheeks, feeling them get slightly warmer.
“There’s no one, but I don’t know if I’m ready to date,” he explains. “I’ve
given this some thought after the hints you’ve been throwing at me, and I know
you expect something, but… You see, I like our friendship. It’s really special
to me.” It’s not that Yixing is not hot, or nice, or wonderful… It’s just…
Baekhyun doesn’t see him like that. This isn’t even about the plan. He might
have thought about asking Yixing out once or twice, right when he was informed
of his first heat situation, but truth is he doesn’t want to have that kind of
relationship with Yixing. “You’d make a great boyfriend, Yixing, I’m pretty
sure you would. But… Maybe not for me?”
Yixing gazes at him and chews. He swallows, licking his lips. “I don’t expect
anything, Baekhyun. I like you, I like talking to you and being around you.
We’re friends. I’m not going to pretend I’m not attracted to you, but that’s
not all. I like our friendship too, it’s also special to me. I’m happy being
friends with you.”
Just like that. Just like that Zhang Yixing admitted to have a crush on him
while promising to respect his feelings. “Why are you so nice, Zhang Yixing?”
“I don’t know.” Yixing leans back on his hands, contemplative. “Sometimes I
think I’m missing good chances to be a little more devious.”
After a few beats of silence, laughter bursts out of Baekhyun and he bends
over, swatting popcorn at Yixing, who easily shields them, smiling at the
omega. He still eats those. Baekhyun pushes him out of the bed.
                                      {x}
Kyungsoo and Chanyeol have resorted to giggling to each other on the hallways,
and Chanyeol wanting to be near Kyungsoo results in all his friends crowding
around them. Their usual cafeteria table’s never been so packed. Jongdae loves
the attention he gets from Chanyeol’s alpha friends, but Baekhyun considers
seeking refuge in the library.
It’s too noisy, too uncomfortable. Baekhyun tries to be friendly and even
engages in conversation with a few of them, but on the second day he finds
somewhere else to sit.
Yixing keeps him company, listening while he talks about the Astronomy club and
how bad things are at work.
“I can’t quit.” Baekhyun shakes his head. “I really want to quit, but I can’t.”
“Baekhyun, if something hurts you, you have to let it go,” Yixing offers, kind
eyes observing him across the table.
“You don’t understand,” the omega insists. “I won’t keep this job once I leave
for college. Once I graduate I won’t have the program’s allowance, I need the
money. If I quit now, I’ll be forced to use all the savings I was reserving for
my freshman year to keep me comfortable until I find a more suitable job.”
Yixing nods. “Then you need to find another job.”
Baekhyun squints. “Find another job? Just to abandon it when I graduate?”
The alpha chuckles, rolling his eyes like Baekhyun is being particularly
difficult. “Then what are you going to do? Keep doing the work of two people
while Soojung curls her hair?”
Just the mention of it makes rage bubble all the way up, Baekhyun’s jaws
tightening.
“You could try to spend less money for the next few months, and get a job as
soon as you start college,” Yixing suggests. “I know you have a plan, but it’s
really awful walking in there to see you taking care of five tables while
Soojung sits unworried.”
He has a point, Baekhyun knows it. “So you’re saying I should quit.”
“I’m saying that you should stop struggling when there’s no reason.”
Toying with his food, Baekhyun decides not to dwell on the subject. Not today,
at least. He’ll keep thinking about it and hoping to reach a reasonable
decision.
                                      {x}
From: Yifan
Good morning! :)
The text comes during Baekhyun’s Algebra class. The teacher, Mr. Lee, is
reading on his table while the class completes a task. Baekhyun’s already
finished it, and he reasons with himself that that’s why he answers Yifan’s
text.
To: Yifan
Morning
When the next text arrives, Baekhyun peeks at the teacher to know if it’s safe
to open it. Mr. Lee is still reading.
From: Yifan
Feeling good?
To: Yifan
So so. You?
From: Yifan
Fine. Decided to drive to work today. It’s too cold to walk outside.
Yifan has a car. Of course he would have a car, why wouldn’t he? He’s not one
of Baekhyun’s teenage friends.
From: Yifan
I heard the college entrance results will be out tomorrow. You took that?
To: Yifan
Yes. Hoping for Seoul National.
Mr. Lee’s voice asking the class to share the results of their task startles
Baekhyun. He quickly types a final message.
To: Yifan
Gotta go
It’s only when the class is over that Baekhyun sees Yifan’s answer: “Good luck
on getting Seoul National! We’ll talk later, Baekhyun.”
 
Yifan texts him the whole day. He sends nice pictures of flowers and stray dogs
-- apparently, Yifan is a dog person. Baekhyun even receives a picture of a
blond guy with fluffy hair looking positively annoyed. In the accompanying
text, Yifan says ‘Out to lunch with Luhan. He’s pissed about getting sauce on
his shirt.’ Baekhyun studies the picture for a while, and smiles when he spots
the stain on Luhan’s shirt.
After class, Baekhyun decides to call in sick at work and goes back to his dorm
room. Jongdae and Kyungsoo come along under the pretense of studying. Kyungsoo
might have the intention of studying, but Jongdae tags along to hang out. Turns
out that they never study, sitting on Baekhyun’s bed and talking about the
college exam results.
“If I don’t get into a good college my parents are going to skin me alive,”
Jongdae laments, leaning his head against the wall.
“Are you going to retake the exam if your grade is too low?” Kyungsoo asks.
“Probably.” Shrugging, the omega sighs. “I might have to get a job, though.
You’ll find me in the nearest coffee shop brewing shit.”
Baekhyun chuckles. “Retaking is not that bad.”
“You only say that because you’re pretty much in,” Kyungsoo says. “The rest of
us mere human beings are allowed to fear failure.”
Kyungsoo is aiming for Yonsei (only because he’s not confident enough to go for
SNU). He knows that Kyungsoo’s cool exterior doesn’t let out how worried he is
about not making it to his first choice. Placing a hand on his friend’s
shoulder, Baekhyun smiles at him. “Your grades have never been less than
perfect. There’s nothing to worry about.”
“Why don’t I get a reassuring speech?!” Jongdae protests, shoving at them.
“Because you cared more about flirting with alphas than studying for the exam,”
Baekhyun explains, and Kyungsoo laughs. They take some time teasing Jongdae
about the two alphas he hooked up with this week, and the conversation turns
into a detailed report of Jongdae’s sexual adventures.
“Speaking of alphas,” Kyungsoo says shooting Baekhyun’s constantly pinging
phone a knowing look. “You’ve been talking?”
Inhaling, Baekhyun retrieves his phone from the desk, dropping it between his
folded legs. “Yes. He sent me a bunch of pictures.”
Jongdae wiggles his eyebrows. “Of himself?”
“Curiously, no. I’ve received pics of dogs, flowers, coffee cups, friends and a
huge microscope, but no selfies.”
“He must be one of those annoying people on Instagram who never post pictures
of themselves,” Kyungsoo points out.
“That’s a shame, to be honest,” Jongdae adds.
“Do you know where you’re going for your date?” Kyungsoo asks.
Baekhyun’s considered a few places, researched online. He’s only ever been to
one café in his whole life, with Jongdae’s parents one day when Baekhyun slept
over, but that’s in Seodaemun and farther from where his school campus is
located, in Seocho.
“It’s hardly a date, but I think I do,” he says. “I’m going to text him about
it later.”
“Are you excited?” Kyungsoo moves a few cushions away from him, taking the
opportunity to smack Jongdae in the face with one of them.
Feeling a little bit uncomfortable, Baekhyun shifts, grabbing one of the
cushions Kyungsoo just discarded. “I guess. Even if we agreed to go as friends,
it still feels like a date.”
“He’s probably planning on wooing you,” Jongdae says.
“If he is,” Kyungsoo glances at him. “Are you going to let him?”
Is he? Baekhyun’s brain is cluttered with thoughts on this matter. He made
peace with the fact that he wants Yifan. If the alpha’s intention is to woo
him, Baekhyun can’t see a good reason to stop him. He wasn’t planning to get
involved with anyone at this point in his life, but now he knows it might just
happen. If it really does happen, Baekhyun hopes to be so deeply and hopelessly
in love that he won’t be able to stop himself.
His silence is enough an answer for Kyungsoo, who sighs and grabs his notebook,
rambling about studying and scolding Jongdae for distracting them with mindless
conversation. Jongdae retaliates by screeching that discussing the entrance
exams isn’t mindless. Eventually, Baekhyun tunes them out, rescuing his phone
and checking the three new messages. Two of them are pictures. The first is an
artwork that, according to Yifan, was designed by a friend of his called Zitao.
It’s the drawing of a lion in a background of geometric patterns. To that
picture, Baekhyun replies with ‘Your friend is very talented.’ The second
picture is of Yifan’s eyes. His strong eyebrows give a nice effect to the
picture. It’s the first of those many pictures that portrays Yifan himself, and
Baekhyun finds that he likes it. He’s not bothered by the spam of pictures,
they’re a way of getting to know Yifan. Baekhyun wonders if that’s why he likes
them.
The last message says ‘I’m really looking forward to Saturday’. Baekhyun’s
stomach flutters, and he blinks down at the screen, fingers hovering the
letters as he ponders over a reply.
To: Yifan
Café Oui - 523-19 Sinsa-dong.
He receives two messages.
From: Yifan
Zitao has an Etsy shop, you should check it out.
From: Yifan
Great! What time?
After Baekhyun takes care of his laundry.
To: Yifan
5PM ok?
Five sounds like a good time for coffee. Or tea, whatever they decide to order.
From: Yifan
It’s perfect, Baekhyun.
Stomach fluttering yet again, Baekhyun locks his phone and drops it back
between his legs, lifting his head to realize that his friends have stopped
fighting and are watching him with knowing eyes. Feeling his cheeks burn,
Baekhyun blinks, scratching his nape.
“What are you looking at?”
“Your dumb smile,” Kyungsoo says.
“Did you even realize you were smiling?” Jongdae chuckles. “It was kind of
cute, Baek.”
“Yifan sent me pictures.” Baekhyun says as if that would justify it all. “He
sends a lot of pictures.”
“Yeah, we know.” Getting up from the bed, Kyungsoo collects his things. “I see
we’re not doing any studying. I better go home and prepare myself for
tomorrow.”
Snorting, Jongdae splays himself on the bed, stretching all over the free
space. “Why do you have to prepare yourself?”
“Because I worry about my future.” The beta opens the door and turns to give
them one last glance before saying, “See you tomorrow,” and leaving.
                                      {x}
There are no classes on CSAT results day. All senior students are jittery. Some
people even take trips to the infirmary because of too much stress. Baekhyun
sits on a bench in the courtyard while his classmates run around crying and
fussing over getting accepted into their first choice universities. Kyungsoo is
in a debate club meeting while Jongdae was last seen playing cards with a group
of people (Baekhyun suspects they were all alphas), leaving Baekhyun to
contemplate life on his own.
Yifan only texted him once so far. ‘Good luck today!” it said -- no pictures
attached. He wouldn’t mind receiving some photos now that there’s absolutely
nothing holding his attention. Baekhyun tries to hear some of the conversations
around him, but they all involve the students’ fear of failing the test, and
not going to college in the spring. He doesn’t know if it’s the lack of
parental pressure in his life, or the fact that he’s confident about getting
his first choice, but Baekhyun can’t relate. Maybe it is the lack of parental
pressure. The caregivers at the orphanage talked to the students about good
grades every day. When he moved to middle school, the supervisors at the
institution he lived were always lecturing them about the importance of being a
good student. However, Baekhyun knows that none of that can actually be
compared the pressure of knowing you’ll disappoint someone if you fail. He
knows that some of his colleagues (like Jongdae) only took the test to please
their parents. Baekhyun never had to do someone else’s will. Everything he’s
done, he’s done for himself. Perhaps that’s an element of his life he should be
grateful for.
“You don’t look worried,” says a soft voice, a lump dropping next to him on the
bench. The lump, he realizes upon glancing, is Yixing.
Baekhyun shrugs. “You don’t look worried.”
“That’s because I didn’t take the CSAT.” Yixing grins.
“Why not?”
Crossing his arms on his chest, Yixing squints. “Well… Considering I’m going
back to China after graduation, there was no reason for me to take the exam.”
A pang of sadness hits Baekhyun at the reminder. He knew Yixing was bound to
return to his homeland eventually, but didn’t know it would happen so soon.
“Oh, you’re going back!”
“Yes I am.” Nodding, the alpha leans into him. “Are you going to miss me, Byun
Baekhyun?”
“Of course! You’re the only decent person in that dorm building!”
Yixing chuckles. “Good thing you’re moving to college.”
Blinking, Baekhyun ponders over his words. “You know… I’m excited about going
to college, but at the same time I feel this anxiousness about being on my own.
In the foster program I have a shelter. If somehow I screw up really bad, I can
get help from them. When I graduate I’ll be on my own. Emancipated,” he snorts,
shaking his head, “sounds crazy.”
Scooting closer to him, Yixing slides an arm around Baekhyun’s shoulders. It’s
not flirtatious, it’s friendly and protective. Baekhyun sighs, gently leaning
onto Yixing, resting his head on the alpha’s shoulder.
“If there’s someone who can pull it off, it’s certainly you,” Yixing says,
fingers brushing on the lobe of Baekhyun’s ear. “You’re amazing, Baekhyun.
You’re capable of incredible things.”
Feeling uncharacteristically warm, Baekhyun leans away from the alpha, Yixing’s
arm dropping to his waist. Reassuring. Baekhyun watches him, taking in the
alpha’s features and serene countenance. There’s no doubt in his face, he
really believes what he just said. Baekhyun smiles.
“It might be scary at first,” Yixing continues, “but you’re not going to be
alone. Jongdae and Kyungsoo will not disappear, and I’m pretty sure you’ll meet
new people.”
He takes a few seconds to absorb Yixing’s words, and groans, kicking the grass
under his feet. “Why do you have to leave? Where will I find someone like you?
You always say the right thing!”
Chuckling, Yixing bumps their shoulders together. “Can I tell you a secret?”
“Of course.”
“I considered taking the exam. I even considered applying for another exchange
program, for a scholarship.” He shrugs. “I thought, ‘This could be a way to
spend more time with Baekhyun’.”
Stomach fluttering, heightened heartbeats, pressure in the chest. Baekhyun is
experiencing every single one of those symptoms, but they feel different this
time. He meets Yixing’s eyes, and sees an ocean of emotions there.
“You’re captivating like that. You captivated me. You captivated Jongdae, you
captivated Kyungsoo -- and Kyungsoo is very difficult to win over. You managed
to snag him.” Yixing offers him a smile, his dimple turning him a little
sweeter. “Just like us, other people will find themselves captivated by you.”
The sensation he has is that of a blanket over his shoulders, warm and
guarding. Yixing is still smiling at him when his hand wraps around Baekhyun’s,
squeezing. “I’m really glad I met you, Baekhyun. Tell me you’ll Skype when I go
home.”
Blinking out of the trance, Baekhyun nods. “Oh, I’ll Skype you. I’ll Skype the
shit out of you, just wait.” And Yixing laughs, big and hearty, his eyes doing
those cute half-moons that make Baekhyun want to poke his cheeks. While they
tease and smile at each other, Baekhyun hopes that Yixing hasn’t noticed the
wet corners of his eyes.
 
The results come out after lunch. As expected, Baekhyun’s grade is enough for
Seoul National. He didn’t expect to score so high though. When a list with the
seniors’ scores is brought to the bulletin board, Baekhyun’s name is at the
very top. According to Mr. Kim, the principal, Baekhyun’s grade was amongst the
highest scores in the country. Every teacher in the institution comes to
congratulate him, and even a few classmates Baekhyun’s never talked to before
come to drop a word. Some people glare at him, envy and jealousy oozing from
their pores, but Baekhyun couldn’t care less about their salty asses. If they
wanted a high score, they should have studied harder.
He’s trying to find his friends amid the horde of crying and excited students
when his phone vibrates in his pocket. He retreats to a safe corner and pulls
the device out.
It’s Yifan.
From: Yifan
That was pretty impressive, Baekhyun. 99%? What did you get wrong? One
question? Half a question?
So he looked up the results. It probably wasn’t hard to find, Yifan does have
access to Baekhyun’s ID number.
To: Yifan
I might be a genius
Snorting, Baekhyun hits send. Jongdae and Kyungsoo find him a minute later.
“You fucker! You got the highest score among us all!” Jongdae screams, swatting
at him. Jongdae got an 87%, which means he’ll probably be waitlisted by mid-
tier colleges. There’s a chance he’ll get a spot, though.
“And you, you scored higher than I thought you would!” Baekhyun exclaims,
shoving back at his friend. Jongdae yells ‘I know!’.
“We knew you would rock that exam,” Kyungsoo says.
“Thanks.” Baekhyun smiles at him, his eyebrows arching as he remembers
Kyungsoo’s own score. “Shit, Soo, you scored really high as well!”
Kyungsoo blushes, but grins excitedly. “You think I can get into Seoul National
with a 96%?”
He might. SNU admits students with scores higher than 97%, but a 96 is really
close. He’ll definitely get into Yonsei, his initial choice.
“If you do, we should room together,” Baekhyun says. Kyungsoo frowns.
“I don’t know how I feel about that.”
Baekhyun’s phone buzzes again, and he checks another message from Yifan. It’s a
picture of his thumbs up.
“Street alpha?” Jongdae guesses.
“He texted me about my score. Apparently, he checked it online.”
“Did he.” Kyungsoo smirks at Baekhyun. A rare occurrence. “I’m going to find
Chanyeol.”
As Kyungsoo leaves, Jongdae pushes Baekhyun away from the crowded corridor and
into the courtyard. Since Baekhyun needs to go to work, he convinces Jongdae to
keep him company in exchange of free juice. His friend is about to refuse when
Baekhyun reminds him of how many alphas stop by the juice bar everyday, and
Jongdae readily agrees.
                                      {x}
Café Oui is probably one of the nicest places Baekhyun’s ever visited. It feels
like a home, with a garden, living rooms, dining tables. It’s so cozy. Baekhyun
walks in and removes his coat, keeping it on his arm as he looks over the
tables. A waiter approaches him, offering to show him to a table, but Baekhyun
dismisses him saying that he’s looking for someone. He doesn’t even know if
Yifan is here yet.
Turns out that he is. Upstairs, on a table in the balcony. Baekhyun spots him
as soon as he gets there, and his stomach does that fluttery thing that’s been
doing a lot lately. With a deep breath, he walks over.
Yifan’s head lifts from his phone when Baekhyun’s shadow falls over him.
Immediately letting go of the phone -- the device falls onto the table with a
faint thud -- Yifan stands up, looking at Baekhyun with so much expectation
that the omega feels a little bit cornered.
“Hi,” he says.
Yifan smiles. “Hi. I was worried that you wouldn’t find me up here.”
When Baekhyun sits across from him, Yifan accompanies him, getting back to his
chair. He looks so damn good. His hair parted to the side, a light blue t-shirt
and jeans. He looks the most casual Baekhyun has ever seen him.
“Did you wait long?” Baekhyun asks as a waitress brings the menu.
“Not at all, I just got here,” the alpha answers. “Do you want to order?”
They take their time reading the menu, Yifan making comments about things that
sound interesting.
This is a different setting. At first, Baekhyun finds it strange that he’s at a
coffee house with Yifan on a date, and the atmosphere is a little awkward. But
as soon as Baekhyun’s peach iced tea and Yifan’s americano arrive, they settle
on a topic that makes the conversation flow.
“So, when will you know if you’re going to Seoul National?”
Baekhyun tries his best not to look so smug when he says, “I’m going. I
received a letter.”
“A letter? Aren’t admission interviews held after the CSAT results?” Yifan sips
on his coffee, eyes never leaving Baekhyun.
“Not for scholarship candidates.”
The information takes a while to sink in, and when it does, Yifan’s eyebrows
shoot up in such a way that Baekhyun feels his cheeks warming.
“Scholarship?” The alpha’s mouth hangs open. “Wow. You really are a genius,
aren’t you?”
Chuckling, Baekhyun rubs a hand on his cheek. “I just worked really hard for
this.”
The look in Yifan’s eyes is one of fascination. “I worked really hard but only
managed to get into University of Seoul. Scoring a 99% and going to SNU on a
scholarship? I think you’re a little more than a hard worker.”
There is more to say about this, but Baekhyun hesitates before talking about
growing up in the orphanage and the support he received from teachers and
caregivers. Yifan probably already knows that he’s a foster kid -- his
authorization papers weren’t signed by parents. Besides, aren’t they on a date
to get to know each other? Isn’t the goal to become friends?
Baekhyun sighs, and blinks down at the table. “If I tell you about me, you need
to tell me about yourself.”
“Deal,” Yifan says without a second guess, lips quirking up.
“I grew up in an orphanage,” he starts, voice low. Baekhyun watches Yifan for
any changes in his features, but he doesn’t seem surprised by the revelation.
“And there, education was very basic. I received a lot of encouragement from
caregivers who thought I was too talented to be wasted. They helped me get into
the fostering program, and once I was in, I made the most of it.
“One of the first lessons I learned was that I need to look out for myself. If
I don’t do it, no one else will. Being good for a spot in a prestigious
university isn’t enough for someone like me. I never had a penny to my name, so
I had to work to be better.”
Yifan looks at him as if he’s trying to memorize every curve of Baekhyun’s
face. “No one can deny your determination.” It’s a strange feeling, but it
almost seems as if those were not the words he wanted to utter. Like he just
toned down his comment.
Taking a sip of his iced tea, Baekhyun nods. “Now you. Were you a good
student?”
The alpha snorts, leaning back onto his chair. “All I cared about was
basketball. I wasn’t good enough for a scholarship, but I was good, and being
good had me excited about the game. I hardly paid any attention to Korean
classes.”
“But you speak Korean very well.”
“Been living in Seoul since I was seven.”
Baekhyun can see Yifan as a basketball player. He has the build for it. “You
still went to college.”
“Oh yeah, I did.” He sips his coffee, placing the cup back on the table and
running his thumb over the rim. “Had to retake the test once to get accepted.
My mom was furious, she could have killed me.”
“You seem to be doing good now,” says Baekhyun.
“Now I am.” Yifan tilts his head to the side. “Do you already know what major
you’re applying for?”
Humming, Baekhyun narrows his eyes, drawing out memories from his childhood. “I
think I do. When I was a kid, I was really into the universe. Planets and stuff
like that. So much that when I moved to the fostering program in middle school,
one of the best things about it was that I could be part of the Astronomy club.
I was convinced that I would major in something sciencey and be a researcher
studying planets. However, as I got older I realized that being a researcher
could take me a long to become rich.”
Yifan interrupts him with a snort, followed by a chuckle. “Sorry. Your goal is
to be rich?”
Baekhyun shrugs, “Kind of. I want to be able to take care of my family, if I
ever have one in the future. I’m a foster kid. I can’t rely on other people,
there’s only me and myself now. The faster I get financial stability the
better. So I gave up on the dream, and decided to major in business.”
“Business?” Yifan winces, as if Baekhyun’s words had physically hurt him.
“That’s the most generic major ever. Only the people who don’t know what they
want from their lives major in business. Or the ones who think they can get
rich faster.”
“Like me.”
“No, not like you. You don’t want to simply get rich. You want to have a family
and take care of them, you just said that.” Leaning forward, Yifan moves his
cup out of the way and places his forearms on the table. “Don’t you think that
someone who scored a 99% at the CSATs is destined for greater things? You could
be the one to discover the next galaxy. Hell, you could discover an inhabited
planet!”
“Hey, there are geniuses working in business too!” Baekhyun retorts. Yifan
laughs, and Baekhyun can’t stop himself from laughing along. “You seem to have
a lot of faith for someone who doesn’t know me very well.”
“I’m trying to rectify that, aren’t I? Besides, I think a researcher or a
scientist would do a great job taking care of their family.”
They talk about their hobbies. Yifan likes to watch cartoons, and going to art
shows. Sometimes he goes to the river courts and plays basketball with his
friends. Sometimes he drives around the city and snaps pictures.
“In my apartment,” he says. Their cups are already empty, and it’s getting
darker outside. The lights in the balcony have already been lit. “There’s a
space for these pictures. I put a few strings on a wall so I could hang the
photos. Gave my place a hipster vibe.”
“You sent me a lot of pictures,” Baekhyun says, remembering all the photos
Yifan texted him. “I wondered if you were into photography or if it was just a
habit.”
“I think it’s a little bit of both. I like pictures. My mom also loves them,
she used to take pics of everything when I was a kid. I hope the stuff I sent
you was not a bother.”
“Oh no, it wasn’t. I liked them.”
Yifan’s smile colors his whole face, and Baekhyun’s stomach flutters. It
fluttered a lot less than he was expecting. It probably means that he’s
comfortable in Yifan’s company.
“It’s getting late,” he says, checking his phone for the time. “I still have to
catch the subway.”
“I can give you a ride, if you want,” Yifan offers.
“It’s fine, thanks.” Baekhyun reaches for his wallet, pulling out the exact
amount of his iced tea.
“Wait a second, I can handle it.” Yifan has his own wallet in hands, grabbing a
couple of bills and waving the waitress over. “It’s only fair that I pay for
your drink.”
Because you stalked me, and kissed me? Baekhyun wants to ask, but he thinks it
might be too soon for that kind of joke. Instead, he chooses to issue a
warning:
“Alright. This is the moment where you can prevent a bad habit from being born.
You’re offering to pay for a broke teenager. Who guarantees that I won’t take
advantage of the situation and expect you to pay again the next time?”
Yifan chuckles. “Although I’m glad you’re thinking about meeting me again, I
don’t mind paying. I have a job, and you’re a broke teenager.”
The waitress brings back Yifan’s change and leaves with their empty cups.
Baekhyun stands up, wearing his coat. He watches Yifan wear a coat of his own
(Baekhyun didn’t even see a coat anywhere. Judging by the way it’s marked by
folds, it was crumpled in a chair nearby).
“I have a job.” Baekhyun thinks it’s pertinent to say.
“You do?” Yifan squints, a smile stretching his lips.
“Yes. I work at the juice bar near the campus.”
“So you’re not exactly a broke teenager.”
“I am! I have a job, but I’m still broke.”
They laugh, a nice sensation lingering in the air after their laughter fades.
Baekhyun watches Yifan for a few beats, unsure of what to do now.
“It was nice seeing you, Baekhyun. I had fun,” he says, and sounds sincere.
Baekhyun puts on a smug face, crossing his arms on his chest. “Surprisingly, I
had fun too.”
Yifan snorts, shaking his head in disapproval, but the smile on his face is
fond. He bows very lightly, and tells Baekhyun he’s looking forward to their
next meeting. Baekhyun is not at all surprised to admit that he is too, looking
forward to their next meeting.
 
Baekhyun tells Jongdae and Kyungsoo about the date over a group call. Jongdae
sounds disappointed that there were no kisses, and Kyungsoo yawns at least
fifteen times before trying to change the subject to his own day with Chanyeol.
Baekhyun allows him to do so and listens quietly, noting how excited his friend
seems whenever he talks about Chanyeol. When Jongdae, claiming that he’s needed
in the kitchen (his parents were cooking), ends the call, Baekhyun decides to
take a quick shower and declare the day over.
He’s easing himself into bed when Yifan sends him a text -- a picture attached.
‘Goodnight, Baekhyun.’ says the text. The picture is a selfie. Yifan has a palm
on his cheek, leaning into it. His hair is wet and falling across his eyebrows.
He looks so soft and warm, almost angelic, and Baekhyun wishes he could brush
those wet strands away from his forehead. Baekhyun lies down, resting his head
on the pillow and keeping his phone right next to him. He doesn’t know for how
long he watches Yifan’s picture, but when sleep comes to take him over, the
screen of his phone is still bright.
 
The same day Baekhyun purchases a coffee mug from Huang Zitao’s Etsy shop, he
sends Yifan his first picture.
It was an impulse decision, to make a purchase from AB Panda. His intention was
to only check out Yifan’s friend’s art, because first thing on Sunday the alpha
sent Baekhyun another picture of one of Zitao’s drawings. At the bottom of the
page, written in thin ink letters, was the address of AB Panda on Etsy. Out of
sheer curiosity, Baekhyun decided to take a look. The result was a purchase.
The drawing on the mug is that first one Yifan sent him, the lion and the
geometric pattern. As he browsed, many other designs also caught Baekhyun’s
attention, but in the end he decided he liked the lion best.
The picture he sends Yifan is one of his empty wallet, accompanied by the words
‘Just purchased an item on your friend’s shop. Now I’m truly broke’.
Yifan answers promptly.
From: Yifan
Wow, cool! Not that you’re truly broke, but that you got something from Zitao’s
shop. He’s going to be happy.
From: Yifan
By the way, I can treat you to lunch if you’re bound to starve.
Baekhyun snorts.
To: Yifan
I can eat from the dorm cafeteria. But thanks for the offer.
From: Yifan
Do you have plans for today?
Let’s see. Besides watching a bunch of movies, Baekhyun has nothing planned. He
doesn’t even have homework. Winter break is around the corner and next week
they’re only having Monday and Tuesday, which is saved for wrapping up club
activities.
To: Yifan
Yes, I’m marathoning Marvel movies.
From: Yifan
Sounds fun!
Strange, but it seems like if they were having this conversation face to face,
Yifan would have the sort of expression on that would urge Baekhyun to invite
him over for his Marvel marathon. He doesn’t.
He sends Yifan another picture though. Later, when he’s halfway through Iron
Man and the bottle of soda he bought downstairs at the vending machine is
empty. Yifan answers him with another picture, one of an amazing view of Seoul
from what it seems like an apartment building. There are curtains framing his
shot. Yifan doesn’t say anything about the photo.
                                      {x}
If Baekhyun has a favorite room in the school building, it’s probably the
Astronomy Club room. The walls are a pale green covered with posters and
artwork made by the students. The bookshelves are filled with books on
astrophysics and universe matter, some of them never touched by a member of the
club. There are two solar system models hanging from the ceiling, one of them
has Venus missing. It’s a pretty standard club room, with tables and chairs and
a black board. What Baekhyun likes about it is the fact that it’s almost always
empty. There are only three members in the Astronomy club (including him), and
the meetings are held whenever the members feel like it. The rest of the week
sees the Astronomy room free of human souls. Which means that Baekhyun has a
hiding place where no one will ever find him, because the Astronomy club is not
as important as the Debate club, therefore they get one of the farthest rooms
near where the janitors keep old brooms and used floor cloths. Baekhyun still
likes it.
He also likes the fact that there aren’t any club activities to be wrapped up
before Winter break. The school gave the students two days to take care of
everything related to clubs, and since the Astronomy Club mainly meets to
discuss the news posted at the NASA website, Baekhyun has two free days. And
then it’s Winter break.
He takes his time having breakfast at the dorm cafeteria, takes a long shower
afterward, and even stops by the front desk to check if he has any mail. There
is absolutely no reason to go to school. He could organize his closet, which is
a big mess, or store all the books he won’t be using at all this break. He
could waste some time on Pinterest gathering ideas for Christmas presents. He
could use his morning for so many different (and productive) ways. Instead,
Baekhyun decides to go to school and just wait for time to pass by, because why
not?
Baekhyun finds it weird that none of his friends bothered to text him first
thing in the morning as they usually do. He texts his group chat with Jongdae
and Kyungsoo inquiring into their whereabouts. Kyungsoo replies a few minutes
later saying that they’re at the library behind the Philosophy shelves, which
is commonly known as the make out spot. Baekhyun frowns, fearing what he might
find there, but decides that Kyungsoo wouldn’t reveal their location if there
was any chance of Baekhyun walking into something inappropriate.
What he finds is Kyungsoo and Chanyeol sitting too close for comfort on the
floor, leaning over a book. They seem immersed into their own world, casually
giggling while reading. A few feet from them, Jongdae sits comfortably on an
alpha’s lap. The dude has an arm around Jongdae’s waist, and the omega’s hands
are wrapped around the other’s neck. They’re almost chest to chest, and
Baekhyun is pretty sure that they’ll start kissing any moment.
Suddenly, Baekhyun understands why none of them called or texted him earlier.
They’re obviously busy with their own romantic adventures, and Baekhyun would
only feel out of place among them. As he is now.
He stands there for what if feels like five minutes just watching the scene in
front of him, his mouth feeling dry, and his chest too empty. Baekhyun
swallows, turning on his heels and walking out as quietly as he can. He’s
halfway out of the library when Kyungsoo catches up with him.
“Where are you going?” his friend asks. His eyes are big and concerned, his
eyebrows a bit frowned, and it makes Baekhyun feel guilty.
Clearing his throat, he tries to put on a better face. “I just remembered I
need to get some stuff from the Astronomy room before they lock it up.”
“I thought you were joining us,” Kyungsoo says.
“I was, but then I remembered the stuff in the room…”
It’s clear from the way Kyungsoo studies him that his friend knows what’s going
on. Kyungsoo sighs, his words very careful. “We’re going out on Wednesday.
There’s this cool bowling place that Sehun wants to take Jongdae. They asked
Chanyeol and I to come along. You should come with us.”
Sehun. Yes, that’s the alpha’s name. Baekhyun thinks he overheard Chanyeol
mentioning that he was interested in Jongdae, but with the omega’s full
schedule there wasn’t a spot for a date with a new alpha. Seems like Jongdae
cleared some space for Sehun, after all. That’s good. Good for them.
“That’s fine, Soo, I have to go Christmas shopping on Wednesday.” Baekhyun
waves his hand. “Otherwise you might not receive a gift,” he chuckles.
“We’re going at night,” Kyungsoo explains. “Chanyeol is borrowing his sister’s
car so he’s taking us all home afterwards. We can stay out later.”
Looks like everything is already planned out. They’ve probably been talking
about it for a few days, and if Baekhyun was not informed, it’s because he
wasn’t a part of their plans. That’s fine, he gets it. It’s a couple’s outing
and Baekhyun is not part of a couple. He feels like he doesn’t have the right
to be upset about it -- it’s not really their fault. They’re not leaving him
out to be mean.
“I’ll think about it,” he says just to avoid dismissing him and making it seem
like he’s salty. “But seriously, I have to go now. I’ll text you later, ok?”
Baekhyun escapes the library before Kyungsoo has the chance to say anything
else.
He takes refuge in the Astronomy room.
Baekhyun grabs The Planets by Dava Sobel from the bookshelves and sits at his
favorite spot by the window. He browses through the book looking for the pages
with pictures, running his fingers over the images of the planets he knows so
well. He wonders if his life would be different if he lived in another planet.
Would he have parents? Would he live in a big house where he’d be allowed to
have pets? In another life, would Baekhyun still prioritize his future over the
present?
Perhaps in another life the circumstances would be otherwise, and he would make
completely different choices.
Taking out his phone, he places the book down on the table and types up a
message.
To: Yifan
Do you think about how different life would be if you were not yourself?
From: Yifan
You mean if I were someone else I know or an entirely different person?
From: Yifan
Good morning, by the way. It’s freezing outside. Wear a coat.
Baekhyun smiles, adjusting the jacket of his school uniform around himself.
To: Yifan
Yes. What if you were not a weird man who walks around bothering young omegas?
From: Yifan
Well I would probably be a young omega being bothered by weird alphas.
To: Yifan
So what you’re saying is that there are only two types of people in the world?
From: Yifan
No, I thought we were just making fun of me. What is this about, anyway?
This is about the empty areas of Baekhyun’s life. And whether they would be
filled if he were someone else. Why he dragged Yifan into this, though, is
unknown to him.
To: Yifan
I’m bored. All my friends have boyfriends and I’m just the single-man-out.
He hits send before considering the implications of that second sentence. Since
Baekhyun started texting Yifan, they’ve met once under the status of “friends”.
So far, the topic of boyfriends and love lives had not come to the surface. His
chest tightens when Yifan doesn’t immediately reply.
From: Yifan
If being single is the cause of your boredom, then find yourself a boyfriend.
I’m pretty sure there are lots of candidates.
Not exactly. There’s Yixing and maybe one of Chanyeol’s friends, but the
problem is not the lack of candidates. The problem is Baekhyun, who’s
perpetually unsure about giving room to his own needs and wants. Or perpetually
ignoring his own needs and wants. The message he sends Yifan doesn’t say that.
To: Yifan
There are.
Baekhyun feels out of breath as soon as his finger hits send. He had no
intention of sending those words. Why the hell did he send that? That is a
complete lie, why would he lie to Yifan? There’s no reason to lie to Yifan.
Unless he wants the alpha to have an idea about him that’s not completely true.
Unless… Unless he just unconsciously tried to impress Yifan. Or worse. Make him
jealous.
Gasping, Baekhyun pushes his chair back, the drag of the metal legs loud in the
empty room. He stands, pacing, his heart beating too fast for his liking. A new
message arrives, and Baekhyun flops onto the chair again, grasping his phone.
From: Yifan
And what do you want from them?
Thoughts are swirling all around his mind and Baekhyun really doesn’t want to
overthink his actions. There is a fact -- the fact that he’s been wanting to
have someone for a while now. And there is an obstacle -- the obstacle of
himself, and the standards he set up for his life. His plan rules out the
desire inside him, but Baekhyun feels himself reaching a point where ignoring
it will no longer be possible. The only certainty, he now sees it clear as day,
is that he wants this. He wants to sit on someone's lap and have their arms
around him. He wants to share a book with someone, or a set of earphones, or a
milkshake or a slice of cake.
His phone pings again.
From: Yifan
Do you want them to act on it?
Yifan considers himself a potential candidate, there is no doubt. Baekhyun’s
next words will not be just an answer. Whatever he says next will define how
their relationship will develop.
Do not overthink, he reminds himself. Do not overthink.
To: Yifan
Perhaps.
To: Yifan
Yes.
 
When Baekhyun gets to the juice bar that afternoon he feels lighter. Bolder,
maybe. He changes into his uniform and cleans the tables. Jinki is having a
talk with Soojung about her nail polishing habits during work hours. Apparently
the owner stopped by an afternoon and found her reading a magazine and trimming
her toes while the tables were packed. Baekhyun wasn’t there, and he finds that
he doesn’t care enough to want to have been there. He doesn’t care that Soojung
doesn’t look the least guilty, and he doesn’t care that he’s once again doing
all the work. He makes juices for customers, does the dishes and when it’s time
for his break, he searches for Jinki.
“Starting from tomorrow, I’m not coming anymore,” he says, surprised by how
steady his voice sounds. Jinki frowns, the cloth he’s using to wipe a few
tables dropping. “I know I’m supposed to give a two weeks notice, but fuck
that. I quit, and today is my last day.”
He feels the weight of a ship being lifted from his back as soon as the words
are out. Jinki touches his arms a little desperately.
“You’re quitting? What? You can’t quit, Baekhyun.”
Baekhyun chuckles humorlessly. “Of course I can. I’ve been wanting to for the
longest time.” Politely removing Jinki’s hands from himself, he adds, “Besides,
I would quit in a few months anyway. I’m just speeding up the process.”
Jinki looks like he wants to argue, but no words come out.
“Sorry, but I won’t change my mind.”
It’s an assholey thing to do, but Baekhyun doesn’t care. He’s impressed with
all the zero fucks he’s giving the matter, and goes through the rest of the day
neatly, knowing that tomorrow he won’t need to come back.
When his shift is over and he changes, leaving his work clothes behind,
Baekhyun feels a small tug in his chest. He’s leaving behind something that he
deeply disliked, but he’s still leaving something behind. It’s one chapter of
his life that’s finished. Knowing that soon a new chapter will start is kind of
scary.
The clock reads 8PM. Baekhyun usually takes seven minutes to walk from the
juice bar to his dorm building, and if he’s fast enough he can still catch
dinner at the cafeteria. He goes outside, burying his hands into his hoodie
pockets to warm them up. It’s cold, but not freezing cold. He watches people
walk past him with two layers of coats and gloves and beanies covering their
ears, and wonders if he can deal with the cold better than other people.
“Hey. Baekhyun.”
The voice comes from behind him. He turns around, finding a familiar figure
leaning against the wall. In his haste to go out, Baekhyun totally missed him.
“Hi,” he answers a little dazed, walking towards the alpha. Yifan has a smile
on, hands buried into his own sweatshirt pockets, and a red beanie covering his
blond hair. “What are you doing here? How did you know I worked here?”
“Well,” Yifan shrugs, shifting, and Baekhyun notices that he has sneakers and
sweatpants on. “I know from the papers at the center that you go to school
here, and when you mentioned you worked at a juice bar close to your campus, it
wasn’t exactly hard to figure out which.”
Amazed, Baekhyun wows. “You really are a stalker.”
Yifan chuckles, running a finger under his nose. “I just wanted to beat the
competition.”
Oh, yes. The stomach flutters. Baekhyun can’t say he missed them. He definitely
didn’t miss the blushes or noticing how handsome Yifan is.
“You’ve beat them,” he says, meeting the alpha’s eyes. He’s wearing a scent
masker, but Baekhyun still can get a hint of his musky scent.
“I have my car parked a few streets from here,” Yifan says. “My friends are
waiting for me at the river court, we’re playing a basketball game.”
The invitation is loud and clear.
Baekhyun knows why he’s here. He made a decision when he sent Yifan that text
earlier this morning, and refusing his invite is going back on that decision.
Besides, Baekhyun wants to go with him.
“Will you come?” Yifan asks just for good measure, it seems.
“Alright,” Baekhyun answers. “But you have to buy me food because I’m
starving.”
The alpha readily agrees, looking too excited while he leads Baekhyun to where
he parked his car. He buys Baekhyun a hotteok from a street vendor, and gives
him permission to eat in the car. Yifan drives a blue Kia Morning. Baekhyun
thinks it fits him. Young and lively.
They make quiet conversation in the car, Baekhyun resorting to his hotteok,
afraid to distract Yifan from the road. He doesn’t usually ride in cars, so he
enjoys the scenery and the unusual routes they take to get to the destination.
It seems like the Christmas lights are brighter when seen from Yifan’s car.
“Are you giving out presents on Christmas day?” Baekhyun absently asks. Just
because it suddenly popped into his mind, and the mood is comfortable enough.
Yifan hums. “I got my mom a pair of earrings. My dad doesn’t like gifts, so I
didn’t get him anything.”
“Are you getting your friends anything?”
“Yeah,” the alpha shoots him a quick glance. “Why do you ask?”
“I didn’t get my friends anything yet,” Baekhyun explains. “I’m thinking of
doing some cards myself, now that I’m jobless.”
“You’re jobless?” Yifan frowns.
“Yeah.” Baekhyun shrugs. “I hated it. I had plans to quit once I moved to
college so I could get an internship, or a job closer to campus.”
“SNU campus is pretty close to that juice bar, you know?”
“I would still have to take a bus everyday. That’s the sort of thing I want to
avoid. When I tell you I’m broke, I’m not being dramatic.”
Yifan laughs. Baekhyun can see the street lights reflected on his eyes, and the
sight makes his stomach flutter one more time.
“Is that why you were on your feet the night we met? You didn’t want to spend
bus money?”
Thinking of that night makes Baekhyun blush, but he forces himself to swallow
down any lumps forming in his throat. They’re not strangers anymore. “Yes,
that’s it. Now you think I’m a cheapskate.”
“Not at all, you’re a broke teenager,” Yifan says matter-of-factly. “Why don’t
you get a bike?”
Baekhyun snorts. “I don’t have money to spend on a bike, Yifan!”
“But you spent money on Zitao’s shop just the other day,” the alpha reminds
him.
“You can’t compare the price of a coffee mug over the cost of a bike.” Baekhyun
takes one final bite at his hotteok, crumpling the paper bag and shoving it in
the pocket of his pants. He’ll remember to toss it in a thrash can.
Yifan finds a parking slot not so far from the river court. They walk a short
stretch to get to where his friends are gathered. Baekhyun hadn’t even
considered the fact that he’s going to meet Yifan’s friends. His stomach
plummets.
There are four of them. Three are men, and one is a woman, all wearing scent
maskers, he can tell. They all comment on Yifan’s tardiness, and the alpha
explains that he had to pick up Baekhyun. Flushing under their eyes, Baekhyun
bows, feeling too warm in his clothes.
“So that’s Baekhyun,” the woman says. She’s blonde, looking young and boyish on
a snapback and clothes at least two sizes larger. Baekhyun can tell that her
hair is short. He thinks she looks adorable (and that she smiles like a
dinosaur, if that’s possible). “I’m Amber, I’m sure Yifan mentioned me.”
He’s embarrassed to say, “He didn’t.”
The others laugh at her, and Baekhyun apologizes. Amber kicks at Yifan’s legs,
cursing him.
“He might not have mentioned us, but we’ve heard a lot about you,” says a man
with caramel blond hair. He looks younger than Amber.
“That’s Luhan,” Yifan says. “Don’t trust his face, he’s older than us all.”
Luhan nods, stroking his own face with reverence. “I’m a miracle of nature.”
“That one over there is Jongin.” Yifan waves a brunette over. He looks a little
shy, a little cute. “He’s Luhan’s little cousin. Jonginnie goes to Yonsei. He’s
pretty smart.”
Jongin smiles at Baekhyun, but says nothing.
The last one to introduce himself is Zitao, and from him, Baekhyun gets a tight
hug and a thanks for purchasing an item from his store. Zitao is really, really
warm.
“What did you get?” he asks. “Was it you who bought the lion mug? I’m not sure
because someone also bought a notebook the same day you made your purchase! I
should have sent you a complimentary gift!”
They ask if Baekhyun wants to play, but he refuses by saying he’s a terrible
athlete, so he just sits nearby to observe. Yifan asks him to hold his phone
and keys, and Baekhyun clutches at them protectively.
He witnesses Yifan’s basketball skills firsthand. The alpha knows how to move
around the court, he has technique and expertise. Not the owner of stellar
talent, but good enough, as he said himself. Halfway through the first game,
Yifan removes his beanie, jogging over to hand it to Baekhyun. It smells like
him. It smells so much like him. Baekhyun feels the urge to hold it close to
his cheek and sniff it. He doesn’t.
He wears it, though, tucking his hair strands inside. He doesn’t want to think
about the reasons that make him wear it, or that tomorrow he’ll be smelling
like alpha.
When the first game is over, they pause to drink water and replenish. Yifan
walks over, a sparkle to his eyes when he touches the beanie in Baekhyun’s
head.
“Looks good on you,” he says.
“I think so too.” Baekhyun grins, tilting his chin up.
Yifan laughs, sitting next to him. Baekhyun spots his friends a few feet away
from them. He can see that Zitao is bugging someone for a bottle of water.
“What you said this morning,” Yifan starts. “Was it sincere? Do you really want
that?”
Does he? Baekhyun’s heart skips a beat when he notices how anxious Yifan looks,
teeth scraping his bottom lip and eyebrows arched.
“Yes,” he answers. “I want that.”
Yifan sighs, looking a bit relieved. “So… Is it ok if I ask you out? On a date?
As… More than a friend?”
Baekhyun was expecting that, but it still doesn't ease the pressure in his
belly. It certainly doesn’t stop his stomach from fluttering or his chest from
tightening.
“Yes, it’s ok,” he says.
None his romantic adventures (or the sole adventure he had with Joonmyun on
freshman year) have prepared him for the effect that Yifan’s gummy smile has on
him.
He watches two more games. Then, they say goodbye to Yifan’s friends and walk
back to the car. After Yifan drops him at the dorm building, Baekhyun goes
upstairs thinking about how his easy and lazy day turned out fast and busy.
                                      {x}
On Tuesday, Baekhyun doesn’t bother going to school. He takes the day to
organize his closet and clean off his desk. Most of his books go back onto the
bookshelf, while his homework sheets are filed into a binder. He places his
newly arrived lion mug on the desk. Baekhyun is not exactly the King of
Organization, but when you live in such a small space, you need to assign
places for everything in order to walk around. He takes advantage of the mood
and cleans his mini fridge, tossing away some bad bananas and a bag of nuts
that’s probably a year old.
When it’s close to lunch time Kyungsoo comes over. He has his backpack, which
probably means that students are being dismissed earlier. It’s officially
Winter break.
“You didn’t show up today,” his friend says, letting himself in. “Is everything
ok?”
“Yeah. I was cleaning. Where’s Jongdae?” Baekhyun sits next to him on the bed.
Kyungsoo shrugs. “Last time I saw him he was quarreling with Sehun.”
“Already?”
“You know Jongdae. Can’t have the attention of only one alpha.”
Baekhyun snorts. “Sehun’s going to have a hard time.”
Humming in accordance, Kyungsoo asks, “Are you coming with us tomorrow? To the
bowling alley.”
“Um. Well, actually, just like I told you, I’m going Christmas shopping.”
Kyungsoo hums again, studying Baekhyun like he’s seeking for signs of a lie in
his expression. “Are you sure you’re ok? I mean, with us going bowling
tomorrow?”
Baekhyun rolls his eyes. “Kyungsoo, why wouldn’t I be ok with that? Because you
have boyfriends and I don’t? That’s ridiculously silly and I thought you knew
me better.”
Kyungsoo keeps watching him, eyes slightly narrowed. Baekhyun clears his
throat. “I quit my job yesterday,” he says, desperate to change the subject.
At that, the beta’s face falls. He scoots closer to Baekhyun. “You did? Why
didn’t you say anything?”
Because I didn’t want to bother you and your boyfriends, is at the tip of his
tongue. But he decided he wouldn’t be snappish or passive aggressive.
“I forgot,” Baekhyun says. “It was a pretty long day.”
He’s not sure why he doesn’t tell Kyungsoo about Yifan or his decision to go on
a date with him. Maybe he is salty after all. Or maybe he doesn’t want him to
think that Baekhyun’s decision was motivated by what happened yesterday in the
library. He doesn’t want Kyungsoo to think that he’s forcing himself to go
faster just to match their pace.
He lets Kyungsoo comfort him for a while, and when his friend leaves, Baekhyun
doesn’t go back to cleaning. He lies on his bed, arms under his head,
pondering.
Baekhyun thinks about Yifan, and their date. They’ve decided that Yifan is
picking Baekhyun from the dorm building on the next Friday, the location a
secret. Just thinking about it makes Baekhyun tingly. He’s never been on a date
before, his thing with Joonmyun was basically restricted to the locker room or
the empty projection room. Sometimes he would go to his house but that’s pretty
much it. They were never on a romantic outing. Should he watch YouTube videos
on how to behave on a date? What to expect from a date? Yifan will probably
expect intimacy, and that’s ok. Baekhyun expects that too. Maybe they’ll hold
hands. That would be nice. There could be a kiss.
Groaning, he faceplants on the pillow. He doesn’t remember having so many
concerns when he was with Joonmyun. Everything flowed so naturally and easily.
Maybe Baekhyun should let it flow just like that, let whatever it’s growing
between him and Yifan to shape itself.
Deciding not to put too much thought into the matter, Baekhyun gets up,
resuming the cleaning and occupying his mind with new arrangements for his two
pairs of shoes.
                                      {x}
Baekhyun only has two people on his Christmas shopping list. He’s been getting
books for Kyungsoo every year, so he thought about being a little more original
this time and get him a journal. Baekhyun has no idea if Kyungsoo is a
journalling kind of person, but the beta sure has a lot of thoughts in that
head of his. Shopping for Jongdae is never a problem, he’s always happy about
receiving a present, and Baekhyun mainly goes for stuff he knows Jongdae will
use (because if he’s going to spend money it’s better be an investment), like
shoe laces or underwear. This year, Baekhyun decides to get him pajamas. It’s
in his budget and he knows Jongdae’s been sleeping in the same Chewbacca t-
shirt for a year.
Having decided what to get his friends, Baekhyun sets to map out his route.
There are several stationery shops in Seodaemun, and if he wants to buy nice
pajamas for Jongdae, he won’t be able to save on bus fares. So, instead of
spending more than necessary on transportation, Baekhyun goes to Hongdae, where
he knows there is an Artbox shop and many retail brands to buy pajamas for
Jongdae.
The streets are packed, but Baekhyun strategically avoids the known stores and
finds refuge in small corners that provide quality material with a good price.
He purchases a funny dinosaur onesie for Jongdae. Once his eyes rested on the
piece, Baekhyun couldn’t see Jongdae wearing anything else. It was a little bit
expensive, but he’s pretty sure it’s worth it.
In the Artbox shop, Baekhyun buys a penguin themed journal for Kyungsoo. He’s
not sure why, but finds it fitting. Instead of going straight to the cashier
after finding Kyungsoo’s gift, Baekhyun strolls around the shop, eyeing stuff
that he would never buy for himself -- like photo albums and frames. He thinks
of Yifan while inspecting one particular photo album. It has black pages and
lots of blank spaces. The alpha would surely know what to make of that album.
Baekhyun checks the price.
Shrugging, he deems it in the budget and carries it to the cashier.
 
On Thursday, Baekhyun receives an e-mail from Safe Cycle Omega Care Center.
 
From: Safe Cycle - Omega Care Center (no-reply@safecycle.com)
To: Byun Baekhyun (bbyun02@gmail.com)
Subject: Heat Care Program - Information
Mr. Byun,
Your heat carer will be available to you in 20 days. The alpha will remain
scheduled for two weeks, as it is not known your exact cycle dates. Attached to
this message you will find the heat carer’s detailed file, as well as the
numbers you should contact when your heat comes.
Regards,
Safe Cycle Omega Care Center
xxxxxxxxxx
Seoul, South Korea
 
Kim Minseok’s file, the one Baekhyun inspected at the center, is the attached
document, along with a list of numbers and e-mails he should contact. In 20
days Baekhyun will have his very own heat carer, and the thought of having sex,
even if as a necessary device for his development as a person, makes his
stomach clench in anxiety. It helps that Kim Minseok looks like a nice guy. At
least Baekhyun tries to convince himself he does.
                                      {x}
There is only one shirt in Baekhyun’s closet that can be considered “new”. It’s
a light pink button down - a present from Kyungsoo’s mother on his last
birthday. Baekhyun thought about wearing this shirt for his interview with
Seoul National, but decided to go in his school uniform. There wasn’t an
occasion special enough to wear such a nice shirt, but he figures tonight is
special enough.
Should he wear jeans on a date? Is there any rule forbidding the use of jeans?
Baekhyun should call Jongdae, he surely knows how to behave in a situation like
this. But. Calling Jongdae would imply confiding about the date, which is
something Baekhyun is not sure he wants. He bears with sweaty hands and
accelerated heartbeats, wearing his pink button down and washed jeans.
All Baekhyun’s knowledge about dating comes from Joonmyun and the limited
collection of movies he’s seen in his life. He knows that sometimes, there is a
kiss on a first date. Yifan already kissed him once before. Could it happen
again? A shiver runs down his spine at the memory of Yifan’s lips on his. This
is the night for kisses, if a kiss is happening it’s probably happening
tonight. Does Baekhyun want to be kissed? Will Yifan wait for a signal or will
he just… Kiss? Should Baekhyun be the one initiating it this time? Dear God.
"I'm such an amateur," Baekhyun tells himself, looking at his styled hair (he's
not even sure he can call it 'styled', since all he did was part it on the
side) and pink button-up in the mirror. It's a good thing he doesn't wear make-
up, his nervous sweating would have ruined it by now. "It’s just a date. I
survived 18 years, I can survive a date. It’s not like I’ve never ‘dated’
anyone before… I’ve dated Joonmyun. We’ve had great moments in the locker
room..."
Yifan arrives at 7PM sharp. Baekhyun is still a bit nervous when they meet in
front of the dorm building. The alpha is just as handsome as any other occasion
Baekhyun's seen him, dressed in a button down and cardigan, looking
nonchalantly perfect. The sight of him nearly takes Baekhyun's breath away. He
keeps breathing by sheer force of will.
"Hey," the alpha says, a small smile playing on his lips as he checks Baekhyun
out. "You... You look... So good."
Snorting, Baekhyun returns the smile. "Thanks. You too. Stylish."
"You think so?"
The omega hums, and Yifan's smile widens.
"So," Baekhyun interrupts what would soon become intense eye contact between
the two of them. "Where is this super secret place you're taking me?"
Yifan seems to remember what they're meeting for, and fishes his car keys from
a pocket. "Come on, you're going to love it."
During the car ride to Yifan's super secret location, Baekhyun gets two texts
from Jongdae. The first asks if he's up for some Starcraft, and the second
whines about Baekhyun's lack of response. He can't lie to Jongdae. Omitting
information is very different from deliberately lying to his best friend about
his whereabouts. A third text arrives just as Yifan talks about something
outrageous done by Luhan.
From: Jongdae
dads are making pizza tonight, they want you to come over. grab a cab, they'll
pay for it when you get here. come onnnnnn
Oh. Crap. There’s no way around it, Baekhyun must reply.
“Is everything ok?” Yifan asks, brows mildly frowning at the road. He turns to
shortly glance at Baekhyun before turning his eyes ahead. “You suddenly went
quiet.”
“I’m fine,” he lies. “Well… Not exactly. I’m not sure. It’s my best friend, he…
He wants me to come over.”
Yifan goes silent, and Baekhyun can tell he realizes that his best friend knows
nothing about this date. No one would invite him over if they knew he was out
on a date. Cursing himself for speaking what he shouldn’t have spoken, Baekhyun
sighs.
“I can drive you there, if you want to go,” Yifan tells him, voice a little
lower. “We can reschedule.”
“No!” Baekhyun exclaims immediately. “I don’t want to go, that’s the problem. I
don’t know how to tell him that.”
Yifan hums. “You didn’t tell him you’re out? Or you didn’t tell him you’re out
with me?”
Just as he feared. Baekhyun blushes, and to his luck, they stop at a red light.
Yifan’s attention is wholly on him. He takes a deep breath. “I didn’t tell him
about tonight because it might spark some questions that I’m not sure I want to
answer.”
Which is silly, he sees it now. He’s on a date. It’s not like he’s having
intercourse of anything, they’re just… On a date, enjoying each other’s company
and eating some nice food, hopefully. If his friends think Baekhyun is doing it
to catch up with them… Well, they can think whatever they want.
Sighing, Yifan smiles. “Right. Just tell him you’re out with a friend.”
Out with a friend. Baekhyun doesn’t want to be out with a friend, that’s not
what tonight was supposed to be. Frowning down at his phone, he types an
answer.
To: Jongdae
I can’t, I’m out with Yifan.
“Alright?” The alpha asks him, and he doesn’t seem at all fazed by the friend
thing.
Baekhyun nods. “Alright.”
“Good!” He stops the car. “We’re here!”
By here, Yifan means a Mr. Pizza store. Baekhyun’s been here many times before
with Jongdae and Kyungsoo, and even alone sometimes.
“Mr. Pizza?” He asks as they walk in, Yifan quickly finding them a table.
“Why? You don’t like it?”
“No, I love it!” Baekhyun is quick to explain. They sit side by side this time,
by Yifan’s initiative, and it feels different from the other time. More
intimate.
“It might be weird, but I wanted to come here with you,” the alpha says, one
elbow on the table as he slightly turns to face Baekhyun. The way he looks down
at the omega makes his insides melt, and his face warmer.
They order Baekhyun’s favorite, the Crunch Potato, with bacon and gorgonzola
cheese. It’s easy to convince Yifan to get his pizza, he seems so prone to
doing Baekhyun’s will.
It’s not just their seatings that make this time feel different than the café
date. It’s Yifan, the way he touches Baekhyun’s wrist ever so gently whenever
he wants Baekhyun to look up at him. It’s how he brushes strands of Baekhyun’s
hair away from his eyes, or how he drops a few ice cubes into Baekhyun’s drink.
It makes Baekhyun realize that “the friend thing” earlier in the car didn’t
change his mind about tonight. He feels good about it, he likes being on a date
with Yifan. He likes having the alpha’s undivided attention, and he loves the
soft looks and the gummy smiles directed at him.
His phone buzzes every minute with new messages, but Baekhyun works really hard
to ignore it, turning the vibrating function off and leaving the damn thing
silently forgotten in his pocket.
“This is a really good pizza,” Yifan mentions halfway through Crunch Potato.
“Isn’t it? The bacon and the gorgonzola really complement the potato.” Baekhyun
stuffs his mouth, cheeks bloating with pizza. “I’m really glad we came here.”
Yifan chuckles, a look that can only be described as fond in his eyes. “Stop
looking at me like that.”
“Do I make you embarrassed?” The alpha inquires, his chin in a palm as he
watches Baekhyun wolf down the pizza like he’s delicately eating grapes.
There’s cheese on the sides of his mouth, he’s pretty sure he doesn’t look as
angelic as Yifan seems to find.
“Sort of.” Baekhyun wipes his mouth with a napkin and rests the pizza on the
plate. “I’m eating pizza and you’re watching it with the kind of look you’d
watch some kittens playing in a field.”
Laughing, Yifan offers him another napkin. “I can’t help it if you’re just as
cute as some kittens playing in a field.”
Well, that makes Baekhyun feel his cheeks coloring. He clears his throat and
scratches at his nose. “Um. Did you know I still have your beanie? I should
have brought it today.”
With a wave of hand, Yifan dismisses it. “Nah, you can keep it. It looks much
better on you anyway.”
Baekhyun’s weak attempt of changing the subject and easing the atmosphere
around them doesn’t work very well. Yifan still follows his every move, eyes
dropping to Baekhyun’s throat when he swallows, and lifting to his lips when he
licks them. It ignites that fire inside him, the one he can only feel when
Yifan is near.
“You never answered my question. About the kiss.”
Stomach fluttering, Baekhyun touches his belly. If only he could get these damn
butterflies to calm the fuck down…
“You never told me if you liked it.”
If he liked it, of course he liked it. He only kissed one other person his
whole life, and even if he had kissed a thousand more, Yifan would still top
them all. Can he tell the alpha, though? It would probably boost Yifan’s
confidence and suggest that Baekhyun wouldn’t mind another smooch. Which is
true. He’s been thinking about it, and he definitely wants another kiss.
So he takes a deep breath and meets the alpha’s eyes. “Yes,” he says. “I liked
it.”
Yifan’s fingers caressing his nape make him want to close his eyes. Baekhyun
knows it’s a trap. The alpha is dangerously closer, and the thumb drawing
circles at the side of his neck slides up to his jaw. The tables are full at
the pizza place, and people could be really ogling them, but Baekhyun can’t
seem to bring himself to care. He’s entranced.
When the alpha leans into him, a shudder runs through his body as Yifan touches
his lips to Baekhyun’s ear and whispers, “Would you like me to kiss you again?”
Lifting a hand to Yifan’s face, Baekhyun lets his fingers explore the alpha’s
cheekbones, his jaw, his nose. He’s so fucking handsome, there’s no other way
to express it. When Yifan’s lips part in surprise, Baekhyun pulls him down, and
kisses him. He can tell that he did it alright by the way Yifan’s hand tightens
around his neck. Baekhyun moves his mouth, catching Yifan’s lips with his own
as his eyes flutter closed. His heart is beating insanely fast, and he can feel
the alpha’s pulse at the tip of his fingers when they move to Yifan’s neck.
Yifan hums into the kiss, threading his other hand into Baekhyun’s hair, taking
charge. The pace is still gentle, the difference is that now Baekhyun lets
Yifan’s lips slide against his. It’s amazing.
They part against Baekhyun’s will (he finds out that he could kiss all night),
one of Yifan’s thumbs brushing the side of Baekhyun’s mouth.
“Tomorrow is Christmas Eve,” the alpha says, eyes glued to Baekhyun as if he
will disappear if he looks away. “What are you doing?”
“Um… I will…” His mind is still a little fuzzy from all the kissing, but
Baekhyun takes control of himself, blinking the haze away. “Probably meet some
friends.”
“Do you want to meet me the day after?”
“On Christmas Day?” Yifan nods. “Alright.”
“Alright.”
 
They get frozen yoghurt after the pizza. Yifan gets lemon, and Baekhyun gets
mint choco. Taking a walk, Yifan sticks closer to Baekhyun under the premise of
warming him up. Baekhyun hears about Yifan, the places he’s traveled to, the
people he’s met while traveling. His friends, his work. Baekhyun talks too,
except that he doesn’t have anything exciting to share. His life’s been pretty
much the orphanage and the schools he’s attended. Not exactly an adventure.
“On the contrary,” Yifan points out. They’re back to Baekhyun’s school campus,
slowly making their way from where Yifan’s parked to the dorm building.
“What do you mean?” The omega frowns.
“I think you lived quite the adventure so far.” Yifan shrugs. When Baekhyun’s
frown does not disappear, he continues, “See, I know a lot of people who have
lived their lives on the tip of their toes. They’re afraid to accomplish stuff,
to get out of their comfort zone. You… You didn’t have a comfort zone. The way
I see it, you did more than a lot of thirty-year-olds out there.”
That’s not exactly true. There are other eighteen year olds who managed to get
scholarships for SNU, Baekhyun wasn’t the only one. It just sounds a little
more amazing because of the orphan factor. It might be awesome, but it’s not
that great. He just got a scholarship and saved some money.
Humming, Baekhyun nods in acknowledgement. “I don’t think I agree with you.”
“You don’t?”
“Well…” He buries his hands in his pockets. It’s getting a little colder. “It’s
just a scholarship. I didn’t clone anyone.”
Yifan chuckles, bumping against Baekhyun’s side. He grabs the omega’s arm,
linking it with his own. It doesn’t even feel like a calculated gesture. It’s
like Yifan just wanted him closer. Baekhyun feels much warmer all of a sudden.
“It’s not about the scholarship,” Yifan says, looking down at him. “It’s about
force of will. You have a goal, right? So, to reach that goal you have some
steps to complete. You didn’t have a penny to your name, so how could you go to
college? A scholarship. Am I right?” Baekhyun nods. “So the fact that you
focused on getting a scholarship and actually got it says a lot about you.
About force of will.”
“I’m not saying it’s silly, or diminishing my hard work. I’m just saying that…
I did what many teenagers do. Get myself a spot in college.”
“You did it better.”
Snorting, Baekhyun shakes his head. Perhaps the orphan factor is a catalyst.
“That scholarship cost me a lot of stuff. I had a boyfriend once.”
There’s silence for a few seconds. Then Yifan clears his throat. “Oh. What
happened?”
“I think we got too immersed in each other. My grades got lower, he got called
into the principal’s office… I didn’t even realize at the time, but once I got
hit by the consequences I realized that I couldn’t afford to have something
else in mind when I had a goal. So I broke up with him.
“I might have mentioned before that I have a plan. I came up with it when I was
a kid. I wanted so bad to have a family, and every time I was not picked for
adoption my hopes died just a little bit more. So one of the caregivers at the
orphanage sat me down and told me I could have a family in the future. My own
family, with my own kids, my own mate. That became my goal. And to get it I
needed much more than to grow up. I needed to be someone. I was born as,
basically, a no one. I didn’t have a family, no one had planned my own future
for me. And if I wanted a family, I knew I had to work hard. So… I didn’t break
up with Joonmyun because I needed a scholarship. I broke up with him because I
was working in stages. First, going to college, then, getting a job, only then,
finding a mate. You see? I had a method, and I was not expecting him. Joonmyun
was a situation I hadn’t anticipated and didn’t know how to deal with.”
It’s only when he stops talking that he realizes they’ve reached the dorm
building. The air around them seems a little denser. Baekhyun wasn’t planning
on talking about serious stuff tonight. He doesn’t know why he did, it just
poured right out.
Yifan watches him, his hair strands softly moving with the wind. “So you had to
give him up. Are you still… Working in stages?”
Baekhyun knows exactly what he’s asking. “I guess now I can think of better
ways to deal with unexpected situations. Instead of breaking up, I could have
enlisted Joonmyun for study groups, we could have worked on our grades
together. We could have spent less time together. Sometimes I think I was too
young for reasonable thinking. Sometimes I think I didn’t like Joonmyun enough
to have come up with alternatives. Either way… Things would unfold a lot
differently.”
Baekhyun has so much more than he had when he left the orphanage, and most of
that is his own merit. He let himself get carried away with Joonmyun because
that was his first experience having a ‘boyfriend’. He was younger and excited
and overwhelmed by all the amazing new things Joonmyun made him feel. He won’t
make the same mistake, Baekhyun’s learned his lesson. He has priorities, but
that doesn’t mean he can’t find a bit of happiness in between. Balance. That’s
what he needs.
Yifan swallows, eyes never leaving Baekhyun’s. He looks a bit nervous, somewhat
anxious. Baekhyun didn’t mean to scare him with his life story, he just felt
like sharing that part of himself with Yifan.
Just for good measure, he adds, “Besides, I see relationships in a different
light now.”
“How so?” The other asks.
“Falling in love is not something you can predict. It happens when it happens.”
Baekhyun doesn’t tell him that Yifan is the reason why he started reevaluating
his concepts. He just smiles up at him as the alpha hums and releases his arm
with a gentle pat on Baekhyun’s hand.
“You’re right, you can’t predict it. But you can avoid it if you want.”
Yifan is watching expectantly, as if Baekhyun’s next words will change the way
he sees the universe. “I don’t think I want to avoid it,” Baekhyun says, and
Yifan’s shoulders visibly relax. “Not anymore.”
They remain silent for a moment, the singing of the crickets surrounding them.
“I should get inside.” Baekhyun points to the door, and Yifan smiles. “Thank
you for walking me back.”
“Thank you for trusting me,” the other says, and he really sounds grateful.
Baekhyun grins, walking back into the building feeling a bit lighter and warmer
than he was when he left.
                                      {x}
He wakes up to a ruckus. There is nervous knocking on his door along with the
incessant ringing of his phone. Baekhyun sits up in a jolt. Mind still numb
from sleep, he forces himself awake, rubbing his eyes and yawning briefly,
because apparently the end of the world has reached him. Cursing, he picks up
his phone but doesn't answer it, just walks towards the door and unlocks it,
pulling it open to reveal Kim Jongdae and Do Kyungsoo looking positively
annoyed. Both of them have their fists midair, Kyungsoo’s other hand holding
his phone against his ear. As soon as the beta puts the phone down, Baekhyun’s
own device stops ringing.
“Fucking finally!” Jongdae walks past him and right into his diminute dorm
room. Kyungsoo glares, pushing Baekhyun further inside and closing the door
behind them. “Can you fucking tell me why the fuck you didn’t answer my fucking
texts last night?”
Baekhyun whistles. “A lot of swearing in a sentence.”
“Not enough swearing! You went out with your alpha last night and forgot to
tell us?” Jongdae demands to know.
Frowning, Baekhyun curls his lips, crossing his arms on his chest. “I don’t
have to tell you anything, you have no right to barge in like I’ve committed a
crime.”
Jongdae looks ready to retort, but Kyungsoo’s hand in his mouth silences him.
“What Jongdae means is… Are you mad at us?”
“No.” Baekhyun tilts his chin up, eyelashes fluttering. “Why would I.”
“Because,” Kyungsoo sighs. “You quit your job and you never told us.”
“I told you when you came over.”
Jongdae’s voice is laced with disdain. “Did you tell me?”
“I figured Kyungsoo would tell you!”
“And why didn’t you call me the past few days? I’ve been texting and leaving
voicemails and you’ve been ignoring them!”
“I haven’t!” Well, he has. The reason is too petty and dumb to be said out
loud.
“You’re both acting like children.” Kyungsoo sits at the edge of Baekhyun’s
bed, carefully avoiding the spots wet with drool. To Jongdae, he says, “If I
had known you’d behave like that, I wouldn’t have dragged you all the way
here.”
The omega deflates. “He ignored me.” He turns to Baekhyun. “Why did you ignore
me?”
“Because you were going to be obnoxious about Yifan,” Baekhyun says. It’s true,
but not the whole truth.
“We’re sorry about not mentioning the bowling thing beforehand. We didn’t want
you to feel left out,” Kyungsoo says, voice thin.
There’s a snarky remark playing at the tip of Baekhyun’s tongue, but he
swallows it down. “You don’t have to feel bad about it, it was a couple’s
thing.”
Kyungsoo nods, his next words careful. “Are you dating the street alpha?”
He’s not sure why that stings. “His name is Yifan.”
“That’s right. I’d forgotten,” the beta says.
“We’re not together.” But we might be dating.
They’re here now. Both of his friends, showing interest in him. There’s no
reason to keep it a secret. Yet, Baekhyun doesn’t say it. This whole thing is
so silly. Why is he acting like a sore loser, he didn’t lose anything to begin
with.
He’s acting as if someone’s forbidden him from getting a boyfriend. No one
forbade him from anything. He trapped himself inside a cage, and it’s not like
Kyungsoo and Jongdae contributed to anything. Baekhyun’s had opportunities
before. He’s had Joonmyun, and he ended that because he felt it was not the
time, even when he really, really wanted to be with Joonmyun. It really is
silly.
Why can’t he get a boyfriend if he wants one? So. So silly.
Sighing, he shakes his head. “I’m sorry for ignoring your texts, Jongdae.”
It takes the omega a while, but he mutters an “Ok”, coming to sit next to
Kyungsoo, right onto the drool spot. He doesn’t seem to have noticed.
“I was jealous of your relationships,” he confesses. It makes his whole face
burn with shame. “I want to have what you have. Maybe that’s why I went out
with Yifan, I don’t know.”
“It might have prompted it, but you’re into him. We’ve been trying to get you
to let him in for some time now,” Kyungsoo reasons. “If that’s what made you
finally get out of your shell, then I’m glad it happened.”
The atmosphere around them eases up, and after a few comfortable minutes in
silence, Baekhyun sits on the floor in front of them. “So… How was your date?”
Jongdae snorts. “Are you kidding me? I’m dying to know about yours. You go
first.”
Baekhyun smiles, and talks.
 
Figuring they’ll spend the next day with their families, Baekhyun gives his
friends their presents. Jongdae is unexpectedly thrilled about his dinosaur
onesie (apparently an inside joke between him and Sehun. Baekhyun fears for the
chastity of his gift), and Kyungsoo thanks him for the journal with a hug,
promising to write on it every night. Jongdae gives Baekhyun a tiny cactus,
saying his dorm needs more green. Kyungsoo, one for practicality, gives him a
pair of gloves.
When the evening falls, Yixing knocks on his door, reminding him of dinner at
the cafeteria.
“They say there’s turkey,” the alpha says, excitement glinting in his eyes.
Christmas Eve dinner at the dorm cafeteria is always a treat. There’s turkey,
ham, a variety of pies and fruit cakes. The building isn’t as packed as usual,
most students having gone home for the holidays, but souls like himself and
Yixing are always there. Tonight the number is a record: seven students.
The food is delicious. Yixing eats three servings while Baekhyun stuffs himself
with pie. They leave the cafeteria with cups of hot chocolate and a bag of
candy canes each.
“Aren’t you sad to be missing Christmas with your family?” the omega asks when
they’re on their way back to their floor.
Yixing shrugs. “My family doesn’t celebrate Christmas. I’m not really missing
out on anything.” He glances at Baekhyun, bumping their shoulders. “What about
you? How are things going with your alpha?”
Eyes slightly widening, Baekhyun feels his cheeks warm up. “My alpha?”
“Yeah. The alpha whose scent is clinging to you. It’s the same from last time.”
If he smells like Yifan, why wouldn’t his incompetent friends mention anything
earlier? Baekhyun is pretty sure he’s wearing a scent masker, why can Yixing
smell Yifan on him? Well, he knows he’s smelling like Yifan, but shouldn’t the
masker dampen it? Baekhyun brings a forearm to his nose and sniffs, a little
bashful. Yixing chuckles.
“This is Biology 101, Byun,” Yixing playfully remarks. “Scent marking is a real
thing. It gets right through scent maskers because if you’ve been scent marked
by someone else, others are supposed to know.”
Huh. Yeah, that makes sense. So basically, scent maskers can’t erase Yifan from
him. Baekhyun lowers his eyes, once again bringing his forearm to his nose.
He’s never put much thought into being scent marked, betas can’t scent mark,
Joonmyun never did it to him. The idea of walking around smelling like Yifan is
somewhat.. Pleasant.
Yixing’s laughter startles him. “Oh my god, you’re so red.” A finger brushes
his cheek, and Baekhyun winces, frowning at Yixing.
“Stop laughing at me,” he pouts, and the alpha hooks an arm around his neck.
“Sorry. Your reaction was just too cute. You don’t have to tell me about your
guy, I was just curious.”
Sipping at his hot chocolate, Baekhyun ponders if he should discuss Yifan with
Yixing (considering the alpha’s previously announced romantic intentions
towards him), or if the way his friend is acting suggests that he’s ok with
talking about it.
“He’s not my alpha… Yet,” he says, a small smile tugging at the corners of his
lips.
Yixing hums, and they stop right in front of their rooms. “He better be good to
you. Or I’ll hunt him down and kick his sorry ass.”
Baekhyun smiles, gently patting Yixing’s shoulder. “Do you wanna come in and
watch something?”
They watch all the videos in a specific japanese cooking YouTube channel
Yixing’s been hooked and end up falling asleep on Baekhyun’s bed, the computer
screen fading to black from disuse after a while.
                                      {x}
The café Baekhyun’s chosen for their meetup is relatively near the campus. The
streets are cold and bright albeit not busy (people are probably indoors with
their relatives), and he makes his way to the shop without any problems. Inside
is warmer, little santas plastered to the walls and fairy lights hanging from
the ceiling. There are candles on the tables acting as centerpieces, and
Baekhyun didn’t think the atmosphere would be this romantic when he convinced
Yifan to meet here.
The alpha is sitting on a couch by the window, looking down at his phone. He’s
wearing a grey sweater and his hair is shorter, giving his dark roots emphasis.
Baekhyun strides in his direction, the bag with Yifan’s present behind his
back.
“Your roots are showing,” the omega says, and Yifan looks up, mouth stretching
in a smile when he catches sight of Baekhyun.
“I’m thinking about letting go of the dye,” he answers, watching as Baekhyun
sits next to him. “Merry Christmas, Baekhyun.”
“Merry Christmas.” Baekhyun returns his smile before offering the gift bag to
Yifan. “I got you something.” The alpha’s eyes widen, and before he can say
anything, Baekhyun clears his throat and continues, “I wasn’t intending to, but
I saw this and it looked like something you’d like.”
Yifan chuckles, gently messing with his shorter strands. “I got you something
as well.” He then grabs something from his feet and presents it to Baekhyun.
It’s a frame, a large frame wrapped in craft paper.
Curious, Baekhyun launches at the frame, unceremoniously ripping the paper
protecting it and gasping in amazement when he sees what it is.
“You gotta be shitting me.”
“I got it commissioned from Zitao. You seemed to like his art, so…”
It’s a painting. A galaxy perfectly portrayed in tones of navy blue, deep
purple and yellow. It doesn’t look like digital art, so Zitao probably painted
this by hand. Baekhyun could cry. He gently runs his finger over the glass
shielding the drawing and sighs.
“This is gorgeous,” his voice comes out like a whisper. “Thank you so much…”
“You’re welcome,” Yifan says. “I remembered you mentioned digging Astronomy.”
He hugs the painting. “It’s very considerate of you. Makes my present look
shabby and cheap.”
The alpha snorts, finally moving on to taking the photo album out of the bag.
He inspects it, the black, blank cover and all the black, blank pages. Baekhyun
bites on his lower lip as he watches him study it.
“It’s a photo album,” he blurts anxiously. Yifan is still twisting the small
book in his hands, not uttering a single word. It’s possible that he hates it
and is taking his time trying to come up with a soft way of breaking it to
Baekhyun. “I know it’s silly, you probably have loads of them…”
Yifan snorts once more, this time it sounds a little fonder. “It’s not silly,
Baekhyun. It’s significant.” He meets the omega’s eyes and smiles. “You learned
that I like photography and you got me a photo album. This means a lot.”
“So… You like it?”
“Of course I like it! This is very special to me.” He brushes a palm against
the cover and sighs, bringing a hand to rest on Baekhyun’s neck. “Thank you,
little omega.”
Heart skipping a beat and stomach dropping to the deepest levels of hell,
Baekhyun feels his whole face warming up. It tingles up to his ears, and he
swallows, trying to blink away this disconcerting feeling. Yifan’s hand is hot
on his skin. It’s been so long since he’s been last called that, he wasn’t
expecting it, it literally caught him off guard. He used to hate being called
“little omega”, but now… Now the words coming out of Yifan’s mouth contribute
to igniting that fire he knows so well, and his whole body shivers at the
alpha’s eyes on him.
“So, I’ve got an idea,” Yifan says, hand moving away from Baekhyun’s neck.
“What about you choose the pictures that will go in here?” He lifts the photo
album and taps the spine.
Baekhyun seems to have lost his voice for a second. Clearing his throat, he
takes a deep breath and tries to regain focus. If Yifan notices his struggle,
he doesn’t make a comment. “But-But you were supposed to work on it. It’s
yours.”
“It’ll be more fun if you help me.” The alpha shrugs. “Besides, it will give me
an excuse to spend more time with you.”
The playfulness in his tone eases the tension in the air, and Baekhyun smiles.
“Fine.”
“Then it’s settled! We’ll schedule something. Are you hungry? I’m hungry.”
Yifan gets them a plateful of pastries that smell absolutely mouth-watering and
keep them occupied for a few minutes. They still talk while eating. Yifan tells
Baekhyun that he got a new bookshelf for his apartment and that his mother
nearly broke it when visiting. They laugh and Baekhyun tells him about Kyungsoo
and Jongdae, and how they had a near-fight the day before. Yifan doesn’t press
for details, but listens attentively.
“Do you have plans for New Years’?” Yifan asks when they’re almost done with
the pastries.
Baekhyun frowns, recollecting memories of past years. “I just stay in. Last
year I was at Jongdae’s place. His dads threw a party. They didn’t mention
anything this year, so maybe I’ll marathon something off Netflix. What about
you?”
“There was talk of Luhan cooking, but that’s kinda dangerous. We might just go
out.”
Baekhyun laughs, and Yifan scoots closer, draping an arm on the back of the
couch, almost around Baekhyun’s shoulders.
“Or…” the alpha singsongs, his arm slipping right to Baekhyun’s shoulders, “I
could just marathon something off Netflix with you.”
It sounds nice, being cozy with Yifan over a movie. “That would be ok.”
“It’s a date then?”
Bumping his shoulder against Yifan’s side under his arm, Baekhyun smiles up at
the alpha, “Yeah. Ok.”
                                      {x}
“Can I just eat ice cream the whole week?” Jongdae inquires, the shopping cart
parked in front of an ice cream fridge.
“Jongdae, your parents want to return from this trip and find you alive,”
Kyungsoo mentions, pushing the cart away before the omega has a chance to load
it with more ice cream pots than necessary. “You should be getting vegetables
and meat.”
“It’s not like he’s going to cook vegetables,” Baekhyun reasons. To be honest,
he think this whole grocery shopping is pointless. Having the house to himself,
Jongdae will just have Sehun or any other alpha of his liking over and feast on
them.
“Still, we should encourage healthy habits,” Kyungsoo says matter-of-factly.
While Kyungsoo drags Jongdae away from the frozen section, Baekhyun’s phone
buzzes on his pocket with the arrival of another text. Yifan’s been ranting
about work since the morning.
From: Yifan
Now the espresso machine is broken. How can they expect me to be productive
without my motivation elixir?
Baekhyun chuckles, lifting his eyes just to check on his friends. Kyungsoo
holds a big, bagged fish up for Jongdae’s inspection. Yep, they’re fine.
To: Yifan
Instead of being angry you could snap a pic of the broken machine and add it to
your new photo album with the words: “Great memories.”
From: Yifan
Is that what you want my first pic in that album to be? Well, it’s your choice
anyway.
The alpha sounds really annoyed.
To: Yifan
You need a breather. Go outside, grab yourself a cookie.
From: Yifan
I’d rather just see you. Do you want to meet later? I get off at 5.
Well. It’s been awhile since they last saw each other. Yifan’s been sending
pouty selfies all week to express how boring his days have been, and how he
would be much happier if he could see Baekhyun’s face on a daily basis. It was
then that Baekhyun decided to send at least one selfie a day. It seemed to work
to humor Yifan at first, but today is Friday, and it looks like work stress
finally caught up with him.
Baekhyun considers his options.
“Hey,” he calls for his friends. “Do you need me later tonight? I might go
out.”
Kyungsoo squints. “Is it your alpha? He just can’t leave you alone, can he? Not
even Chanyeol is that clingy.”
Jongdae snorts, “Yeah, right.” Kyungsoo elbows him in the ribs, and the omega
bends over in pain. Baekhyun winces.
“We haven’t seen each other since Christmas.”
“Like that wasn’t a few days ago,” Kyungsoo says, dropping a few peppers in
Jongdae’s shopping cart. “Are you dating? Officially?”
An excellent question Baekhyun himself wasn’t able to answer. They kissed and
snuggled but there was never talk of anything ‘official’.
Baekhyun’s silence is probably enough answer. Kyungsoo sighs, “Have you given
the fact that you hired a heat carer some thought? I mean, you and Street Alpha
are getting closer. How is he going to feel when someone else gets to pop your
cherry?”
Oh. Right. The heat carer. He didn’t give Kim Minseok any thought. In fact,
Baekhyun even thinks he’s forgotten the event of his first heat altogether.
He’s been getting closer to this alpha, dating the man, and hasn’t even
considered what would happen if his heat strikes when they’re together. Would
Baekhyun call for his heat carer while Yifan waits it out? Would Yifan’s alpha
instincts kick in? He’s heard about alphas jumping omegas in heat out of
instinct-- friends, cousins, family members… Would Baekhyun want Yifan to jump
him? Would he feel safer sharing such an important moment with someone he knows
a little better? Studying Kim Minseok’s profile is definitely not the same as
spending time with Yifan, learning about him, learning to trust him.
Sighing, Baekhyun faces Kyungsoo, his friend patiently waiting for a reaction.
“Don’t call him Street Alpha. I don’t call your boyfriend Lanky Alpha, do I?”
Kyungsoo snorts, slapping a chocolate bar away from Jongdae’s hands. The omega
yelps, pouting at the item now lying on the floor. “So you do think of him as
your boyfriend. That’s progress.”
As he watches Kyungsoo lead an unhappy Jongdae towards the fruits section,
Baekhyun frowns, thinking he needs to start paying more attention to himself.
 
To: Yifan
I’m outside.
Baekhyun leans against the wall, pocketing his phone and folding his arms on
his chest. After Kyungsoo escorted Jongdae home (“Better cook some of these
broccoli to make sure he’ll eat them”), Baekhyun arranged to meet Yifan at 5.
They would go somewhere, Yifan’s choice, to get his mind off work stress.
It doesn’t take long for the alpha to come out, a plain white button down and
jeans, hair a bit messy. Baekhyun chuckles.
“You look awful,” he says.
Yifan sighs. “I feel awful. I can’t believe it’s Friday.”
“Well, it’s Friday.” Baekhyun rests his hand on Yifan’s arm, offering him a
reassuring smile. “So where do you want to go?”
 
They end up at a rooftop restaurant in Gangnam. Not the kind of place Baekhyun
would ever go on his own, or with his friends. When they got there Zitao and
Amber were already waiting, sitting at a large table. They looked surprised at
seeing Baekhyun, which indicates that this meeting was already planned, and
Yifan did not inform them Baekhyun was coming. He didn’t have time to wallow in
embarrassment, though. Zitao quickly found him a seat by his side and engaged
Baekhyun in exciting chatter about the galaxy painting Yifan commissioned and
whether Baekhyun loves it or not.
“Zitao, don’t overwhelm him,” Yifan warns a few minutes into the conversation.
He planted himself next to Baekhyun, his arm resting over Baekhyun’s shoulders.
“He’s not overwhelmed.” Zitao looks at Baekhyun. “Are you overwhelmed?”
Chuckling, Baekhyun shakes his head, leaning back into Yifan. The alpha rubs
his neck, and the gesture makes Baekhyun look up at him. “He’s not overwhelming
me.”
The hand that was on Baekhyun’s neck moves to his cheek, Yifan’s knuckles
gently caressing his skin. It’s warm and comfortable, and the fluttering in his
stomach feels so natural that Baekhyun doesn’t even startle at the touch. He
smiles blissfully.
“He’s monopolizing you, then,” the alpha accuses, his hand hand sliding to
Baekhyun’s shoulder, down to rub his arm. He glares at Zitao. “I brought you
here for myself not for Zitao.”
Zitao, who Baekhyun can tell now is an alpha, frowns and pouts.
Baekhyun playfully elbows Yifan. “You are monopolizing me! I wanna talk to your
friends.”
“See!” Zitao exclaims, and Baekhyun laughs.
Amber, who’s been silent all throughout the exchange, laughs as well, drinking
something pink from a tall glass. She seems to notice Baekhyun’s eyes. “Do you
want some? It’s delicious.”
A bit embarrassed to have been caught watching, Baekhyun shakes his head. “No,
thanks.”
“Don’t offer him alcohol, he can’t drink that stuff!” Zitao reprimands and soon
enough they’re arguing.
A few minutes later, Luhan and Jongin arrive, and the table gets even louder.
Baekhyun knows there’s music playing on the background, but Yifan’s friends are
so loud that whatever song is playing gets muffled under their loud voices. The
soft drinks Yifan ordered them get forgotten on the table. Seems like everyone
is curious about Baekhyun. Did he really get a scholarship for SNU? Is he
really living on school dorms? Is it true that Baekhyun has no family?
“Amber, what the fuck?” Luhan frows at the beta girl, lightly punching her arm.
“Seriously, you’re all making me look like a big gossip.” Yifan grunts.
Baekhyun smiles at that. “It’s fine. Yes, I grew up at an orphanage.”
Zitao leans forward, Jongin arches his eyebrows and Amber massages her arm.
Yifan tightens his hold on Baekhyun. “And how was it?” asks Luhan.
“Well… I don’t know. It was… Crowded? Too many children. But I don’t have bad
memories, I lived in a nice place. The people were nice.”
The group remain silent for a while, their eyes intent on Baekhyun, studying
him, probably asking themselves the same question everyone else Baekhyun knows
has once asked themselves (or him): How did he turn out like this if he grew up
like that?
“Stop staring you bunch of creeps, you’ve bothered him enough for tonight,”
Yifan says, retrieving his wallet and dumping a few bills on the table. “We
should get going.”
“What?”
“Already?”
“But Baekhyun didn’t even tell me if he liked my painting!”
They’re on their feet before Baekhyun’s noticed. He tells Zitao, “I loved it!”
Yifan drags him away and all Baekhyun can do for them is wave goodbye, four
pairs of eyes staring astonished after them.
“Why are you in such a hurry?” Baekhyun inquires when they’re in the elevator.
“I thought you wanted to have fun? To alleviate work stress?”
“No, I said I wanted to see you, remember?” Yifan looks down at him. “I brought
you here because they were expecting me tonight, but I wanted your company. And
they kept demanding your attention and asking questions and being obnoxious.”
The alpha huffs in annoyance, folding his arms on his chest.
Is he serious? He looks like he’s serious. Baekhyun rolls his eyes, stepping
out of the elevator when the door splits open. “Yifan… I wanted to talk to
them, they weren’t bothering me.”
The alpha stops, rubbing both hands on his face. He looks genuinely tired when
his eyes meet Baekhyun’s. “Sorry. I’m not making any sense, I know. I’m sorry.
I just had a bad day. We can go back upstairs if you want--”
“No, wait,” he reclaims Yifan’s hand, stepping closer. “What’s going on? Do you
need to talk?”
Yifan blinks at him. Three beats later, he sighs, running a hand through
Baekhyun’s hair, drawing the omega into him. Yifan’s arms wrap around
Baekhyun’s middle, his face burying in Baekhyun’s hair. The alpha inhales, and
when he exhales his arms tighten around Baekhyun. This. This is what he needed.
Baekhyun rests one hand on Yifan’s shoulder, the other sliding to his neck.
Somehow, Baekhyun feels that this is the most intimate moment they’ve ever
shared. Of course kissing is intimate, but holding Yifan like this, rubbing his
neck and leaning his cheek on his shoulder. This is more.
They hold each other for a few minutes, then Baekhyun remembers they’re
standing in the middle of the building’s lounge, and there are probably people
staring at them. He rests both hands on Yifan’s face, leaning back a bit so
they can face each other. “Are you feeling better?”
The alpha frowns. “I’m not sure. I might need another one of those…” Baekhyun
laughs, and Yifan smiles. “Do you have to go? We can go to my apartment and
work on that photo album? Listen to some music?”
Once upon a time Baekhyun would refuse. He would question Yifan’s motives,
doubt him. Does he really want to work on a photo album or he’ll jump Baekhyun
the minute they step inside his apartment? Instead, Baekhyun agrees to go with
him so quick Yifan has to double check. Baekhyun simply shrugs. He doesn’t want
to go home yet. He didn’t stay in Yifan’s company long enough.
 
The place is, surprisingly, tidy. Baekhyun’s always had this idea that young
people living alone resulted in a messy environment. He was wrong, apparently.
Yifan’s apartment is incredibly clean, not a single item out of its rightful
spot: books in the bookcase, chairs near the table, pillows on the couch. It’s
a small space, living and dining room attached, the kitchen separated by a
small counter. Small, but charming. The furniture is either black or white, and
so is the art on the walls (Baekhyun can identify Zitao’s style now that he’s
seen so much of it).
“It’s lovely,” he says, taking one last look around before flopping on the
couch. Baekhyun runs his palms over the padded surface and cushions. Soft and
comfortable like a good couch is supposed to be. He could easily nap there.
“You think?” Yifan places his car keys on a side table and walks towards
Baekhyun. “Took me a while to furnish it but I think I’m happy with the
results.” The other sits by his side, moving a few pillows out of the way.
Humming, Baekhyun leans back, tilting his head back, resting his nape on a
cushion. The ceiling lamp is square and simple, but provides good lighting to
the room.
“Do you want something to drink? To eat?” Yifan offers.
“No, I’m good.” Baekhyun looks back down, facing the alpha next to him. “So…
You mentioned the photo album?”
Yifan blinks. “Ah, yes! Just a moment.” Then he scurries away, returning
moments later with the black photo album Baekhyun gifted him on Christmas, a
silver pen and a polaroid camera. He reclaims his seat next to Baekhyun and
promptly presents him with the polaroid camera.
Baekhyun inspects the device. “Am I supposed to take pictures now? I thought
you would ask me to choose from a bunch.”
The other chuckles. “I thought it would be fun for you to snap the first
picture that goes in there.” Yifan lightly pinches his earlobe. “I’d like to
see what’s beautiful in your eyes.”
His fingers remain on Baekhyun’s ear, thumb tracing the edges and sliding to
the back of his head. The way Yifan fondles him almost makes Baekhyun close his
eyes to bask in the attention. He chooses to lean into the other’s touch,
risking a peek at him. They’ve been careful around each other, but what
happened the night Yifan first kissed him suggests that getting closer was
inevitable. Getting to this point, having Yifan’s hands caress him and his eyes
resting on Baekhyun with so much fondness, was inevitable.
Perhaps that’s what makes Baekhyun turn the polaroid on and lift the camera,
photographing Yifan. The alpha startles, blinking to alleviate the effects of
the flash on his eyes. Baekhyun picks the photo that the camera spits, shaking
the piece of paper to help it dry faster.
“What, Baekhyun…”
“You wanted to see what’s beautiful in my eyes.” The omega holds the photo up
for him to see. “Not sure if you’re beautiful when you look this startled, but
you’re cute enough.”
It takes him a few seconds, but Yifan laughs eventually, picking the photo held
by Baekhyun and studying it. “This is horrible. I look terrible.”
“Nonsense!” Baekhyun stands up, searching for something else to capture on
camera. He goes out to the small balcony, seeing the rooftop of a slightly
shorter building. The view from Yifan’s balcony is not splendid at night, he’s
sure it’s better during the day. Baekhyun continues his inspection, finding a
few interesting decoration pieces, but nothing exciting enough to deserve a
picture.
“We should have done this when we were outside,” he says.
“I didn’t have my camera then,” Yifan explains. “Besides, I was too stressed
out to have good ideas.”
The omega returns to the couch, placing the camera on the coffee table. “Guess
we’ll have to use that first one.”
“Or… I could just print one of those selfies you sent me this week.” Yifan
shrugs, scooting a bit closer to Baekhyun. Their thighs touch, and the alpha
spreads his arm on the back of the couch. Baekhyun can feel it brushing his
nape. “Those were really cute.”
The atmosphere changes then -- perhaps the way Yifan’s arm slowly sneaks around
Baekhyun’s shoulder, his eyes shifting between the omega’s eyes and his mouth.
Baekhyun can feel his heart beating faster, that warm feeling inside him
intensifying.
“But you’re cute, so,” Yifan mutters, a hand lifting to poke Baekhyun's nose.
For some reason, Baekhyun feels bold. Maybe it’s how clearly he can see in
Yifan’s eyes how much he wants Baekhyun, maybe it’s the alpha’s scent escaping
from the confines of the masker, telling Baekhyun that he’s messing with this
man’s senses. He hums, leaning into Yifan, meeting his eyes. “Are you going to
kiss me, alpha?”
Yifan inhales, the corners of his lips stretching as he lifts Baekhyun’s face,
leaning close enough for his nose to touch Baekhyun’s. This time, the answer
Baekhyun gets is Yifan’s mouth pressing against his, his lips quickly parting
to claim Baekhyun’s. They haven’t kissed many times, but enough times for
Baekhyun to start recognizing the patterns of Yifan’s kiss, how long it takes
him to wrap his arms around Baekhyun, to pull him closer and search the omega’s
tongue with his.
They kiss for god knows how long, Baekhyun isn’t really keeping track of time,
only minding Yifan’s hands squeezing his waist, brushing his neck. He ends up
half on top of Yifan, one knee between the alpha’s legs as the kissing deepens,
Baekhyun’s mouth exploring Yifan’s face, kissing the line of his jaw before
sliding down to his neck. Between a moan and a groan, Yifan palms the back of
Baekhyun’s thighs, pulling them forward and causing Baekhyun to drop on his
lap. The omega yelps, gripping at the other’s shoulder to avoid falling back.
He meets Yifan’s eyes, finding fiery desire glinting there. The way Yifan
growls at him, pulling him closer makes Baekhyun’s breath catch. He feels that
flame burning up inside him when Yifan pushes his nose right below Baekhyun’s
jaw, his hands tightening on Yifan’s shoulders, teeth pulling on his lower lip
to prevent a moan from escaping. But the truth is that Baekhyun can feel
himself losing control, he can feel the very essence of himself pleading,
yearning--
Yifan noses his way back to Baekhyun’s mouth, his tongue quickly coaxing
Baekhyun’s lips apart. One of Yifan’s hold a tight grip at Baekhyun’s hair,
while the other rests on his lower back keeping him right where he is. The
ghost of Yifan’s fingers hovering his ass cheeks makes Baekhyun tremble, a
needy whine getting muffled by the alpha’s insistent mouth hot, wet and open
against his as saliva pools on the corners of their mouths.
The hand fondling with his ass moves to his hip, sneaking beneath his shirt,
one thumb brushing and pressing against his skin. Baekhyun lets out a helpless
whimper. His pants are too tight and his skin feels oddly sticky, beads of
sweat rolling down his neck. He’s hard, been hard since Yifan first touched his
mouth, and now Baekhyun can feel arousal clawing at him, setting him ablaze. He
parts the kiss, desperate for air, panting against Yifan’s mouth as the alpha
surges up for another, clearly not done with ravishing Baekhyun’s lips.
The hand at his hip slides to his back, Yifan’s palm sprawling open to push
Baekhyun even further on his lap, precisely on top of his undeniable hardness.
Yifan’s rock solid cock is right under Baekhyun’s clothed ass, and he curses
amid kissing, pulling on Yifan’s shirt, touching his arms, and he doesn’t know
where to place his hands. His head is spinning, this alpha is pressing open-
mouthed kisses on his neck, licking his throat, and his cock is twitching
beneath Baekhyun. He can’t help the sounds that come out of him because this…
He’s never felt anything like it. He knows Yifan’s got him. He’s got him good,
and supple, and eager for him. There is a sort of pull yanking him towards
Yifan, begging him to deliver himself, to allow himself to be taken. And
Baekhyun readily complies. He lets Yifan handle him as he pleases, lets him
lick and nip at his lips, lets him pull his shirt up, tossing the bundle of
fabric somewhere behind them, and lets him suck on his nipples. Baekhyun’s
sweaty body shakes at every tug Yifan gives his nipples, fingers weakly trying
to grasp at the alpha’s hair. They slip, falling limp on Yifan’s shoulder as
his alpha runs his mouth over his chest.
How did this end up like this? They were just kissing, and now Baekhyun feels
as if he’s hanging by a thread. His eyelids flutter closed as his head tilts
back, a call for the alpha whose mouth seems to be attached to his neck rolling
off his tongue. Baekhyun whimpers when Yifan growls, calling once more. Alpha.
Yifan suddenly stops, leaning back just a bit. When Baekhyun opens his eyes, he
meets pure fire dancing across Yifan’s irises. He’s not given enough time to
think before the alpha is going for his neck, teeth sinking on Baekhyun’s skin
with purpose.
Baekhyun’s eyes widen, and his jaw slacks open in a silent scream. His fingers
dig on Yifan’s back seeking support, trying to signal something, he’s not sure.
But the bite seems to jolt him awake like a bucket of cold water to the face.
All of a sudden there is no more fire lighting inside him, his head seems
clear, and his heart beats the fastest he’s ever registered.
Yifan bit him. His tongue is now licking the bitten spot on Baekhyun’s neck,
spot that will surely leave a nice, purple mark on him. A mark. A mark made by
an alpha.
A jumble of thoughts swirl wildly inside his head, and Baekhyun frowns. The
bite seems to have subdued Yifan’s eagerness as well. The alpha leans away from
Baekhyun’s neck, studying his face with careful eyes. He runs both hands
through Baekhyun’s hair, and it’s such a fond gesture, so soothing on
Baekhyun’s warm skin...
The bite on his neck throbs, and even if the skin wasn’t pierced by Yifan’s
teeth, Baekhyun still feels the need to nurse it. He places a closed palm at
the spot, cupping the bite as if it can make it stop hurting. Baekhyun
swallows, eyes never leaving Yifan’s, and whatever the alpha sees in them makes
him frown.
“Baekhyun?” He asks, not looking as assured as he did a moment ago, attention
shifting from Baekhyun’s face to his neck.
Baekhyun might not be an expert in relationships, but he knows the significance
of an alpha’s mark on an omega. Alphas leave marks on their lovers to assert
ownership, don’t they? The bite on his neck, shaped just like Yifan’s teeth, is
like a tattoo with the alpha’s name on Baekhyun’s skin.
His stomach twists, and Baekhyun feels like he’s going to throw up.
Quickly scrambling off Yifan’s lap, he crawls after his shirt on the floor,
trembly hands pulling it on. He can hear Yifan calling for him once more, the
alpha’s shadow falling on him as Baekhyun stands up, not daring to turn around
to face him. Baekhyun probably looks disheveled and thoroughly kissed, his lips
still tingling, and he really doesn’t want to face Yifan right now.
“Baekhyun, what--” He shakes Yifan’s hand off his elbow, and gets his phone
from where the alpha had placed it earlier, on the couch. “Hey, Baekhyun!”
The alpha’s tone makes him halt. He can sense Yifan stepping closer, and soon
enough his hand is turning Baekhyun around. He refuses to look at Yifan for
long, keeping his eyes on his chest.
“What’s the matter?”
Baekhyun clears his throat. “I think I should go.”
“But why?” Yifan’s voice suggests that he’s confused. Of course he is. He has
no idea of the weight of his actions. It was the same when they first met, the
words he tossed at Baekhyun.
Stomach twisting once more, Baekhyun feels the urge to leave as fast as he can.
“It’s getting late.” Now, Baekhyun makes sure to meet Yifan’s eyes. He wants
the latter to understand that he really means to leave.
Yifan blinks, nodding in acceptance, his hands falling from Baekhyun’s sides.
“Let me give you a ride.” The alpha runs to the side table where he dropped his
car keys earlier. “Just, let me--”
“No need, I’ll walk to the station.” While he walks towards the door, Baekhyun
hears a long sigh.
“Did I do something wrong? Talk to me!”
“Bye, Yifan.” Baekhyun walks out and closes the door behind him, hurrying to
the elevator and praying for it to arrive quickly. Lucky for him it’s already
there and Baekhyun hops on, watching the doors close on Yifan’s face as he
calls for Baekhyun.
 
Somehow he ends up at Jongdae’s house, banging furiously on the door, tears
rolling down his cheeks. The streets seemed dim to him, fairy lights from end-
of-year decorations illuminating the path all the way here and Baekhyun
shuddered nervously at any potential alpha that crossed him. He keeps banging
on the door, and the harder he punches it, the heavier his tears fall. He just
wants to go inside and feel safer.
It’s Chanyeol who opens the door, the tension in his face shifting to confusion
when he takes in Baekhyun’s figure. “Baekhyun?” He inquires, pulling the omega
inside. “HEY! IT’S BAEKHYUN! AND HE’S… He’s crying?” Baekhyun wipes his face
with the heels of his hands.
Jongdae, Kyungsoo and Sehun come from the kitchen, and Baekhyun wonders for a
second how they’re all here. It was just Jongdae and Kyungsoo when he left them
at the supermarket earlier.
“Dammit Baek, we thought it was a robber!” Jongdae yells, his angry face
falling as he sees Baekhyun flopping on his couch. “Baek?”
In a split second they’re all surrounding him on the couch, and there are
worried hands on his shoulders, fingers wiping his tears.
“Baekhyun, what happened?” Kyungsoo asks, his hands caressing Baekhyun’s arm.
“Get him some water!”
Chanyeol flies to the kitchen, returning a few moments later with a glass of
water. Baekhyun gulps it all at once. Everyone stays silent, studying him
carefully, as if Baekhyun could burst at any moment. If Baekhyun had parents,
or any family, he would turn to them and seek their comfort. He doesn’t.
Jongdae and Kyungsoo are the closest thing to a family he has.
He was right coming here. Their presence soothes him, and when the tears stop
falling, Baekhyun speaks.
“Yifan marked me,” he confesses, voice still watery. “He bit me.”
Jongdae frowns. “He bit you?” His friend’s eyes settle on his neck, spotting
the now purpling bruise. “Did he do it too hard? Did you not want him to do
it?”
Kyungsoo shakes his head. “Let him explain first. Baek, what happened? Tell us
what happened exactly.”
He swallows, blinking. “We were… We were kissing…” Baekhyun sighs. “Things got
heated--”
“You were making out, yes.”
“Jongdae, let him speak.”
Clearing his throat, Baekhyun continues, “I felt… It was good.” His ears
tingle, his face getting warmer. Baekhyun feels the urge to cover himself. “And
then he bit me.”
“And you didn’t want him to?” Jongdae turns to ask, and Baekhyun is so
confused, because he didn’t know if he wanted that bite, he still doesn’t know.
He’s struggling with the meaning of it, what Yifan really wants, what Baekhyun
really wants.
“I don’t know, I…” His chest feels heavy, and he presses a hand against his
throat. “He said some things the night we met, do you remember? I was coming to
your house, and he said--”
Jongdae interrupts him, “That was some time ago. Things changed, didn’t they?”
“Wait,” Chanyeol says, eyebrows knitted. “The last time I talked to Yifan hyung
he said things were going well between the two of you.”
“Baekhyun, didn’t he apologize for how he acted that night? Why are you
dwelling on that now?” Kyungsoo asks, his hand now squeezing Baekhyun’s
reassuringly.
“Because!!!” Baekhyun exclaims. “Maybe I was right all along. Maybe he really
is that kind of person, maybe he--”
“Baekhyun, listen.” The seriousness in Kyungsoo’s voice makes him meet the
beta’s eyes. “What was it exactly that he did to hurt you? Did he bite you
against your will? Did you ask him to stop and he didn’t?”
Ok. Alright. Baekhyun takes a deep breath and tries to align his thoughts.
These are his friends. They’re not here to judge him, they’re here to support
him, and if necessary, to put some sense into him.
“We were making out, and things were good, and he bit me. He didn’t ask if he
could, or if I wanted to. He marked me. And then I left.”
Kyungsoo nods. “You didn’t talk about marking or biting before, did you? And he
had no idea you didn’t want to be marked.”
No, that’s not it. “I don’t know if I don’t want a mark, I just-- He caught me
by surprise.”
“It’s ok,” Jongdae tells him, his voice even and soothing. “Let me see if I
understand… You’re not sure if you’re ok with Yifan biting you, is that it?”
Yes, that’s it. Baekhyun nods, fingers tightening around the glass. “I thought
about everything, Jongdae. I thought about having a relationship, I thought
about falling in love, I thought about balancing everything, you know I did!”
Baekhyun is starting to hear himself sounding desperate. He takes a deep
breath, and Kyungsoo squeezes his hand. “I… I didn’t consider the mark. Why
didn’t I consider it? I should have thought about it. It’s just… It never
happened with Joonmyun, he never--”
“Alright, we get you,” Kyungsoo says. “You need more time to come to terms with
it.”
He needs to understand if the mark belongs to the kind of relationship he’s
ready to engage in. Baekhyun’s ever seen an alpha’s bite as “the next step”. In
school, whenever an omega walks sporting a mark, it’s a sign that they’re one
step closer to mating. Baekhyun wants a boyfriend, but it’s too soon for a
mate.
“Can I tell you something about the mark?” Jongdae asks, and Baekhyun nods, and
his friend lifts the hem of his shirt to reveal a fresh, purple bite on his
hip. “Do you see this mark? This was Sehun yesterday.” Then, he pulls the
collar of his shirt down to reveal a fading bite on his chest. This one is
almost gone, but the teeth marks are still pink. “This one was some other
alpha, about a month ago.”
Baekhyun frowns. He had no idea Jongdae let alphas bite him.
Jongdae continues, “It’s not permanent. It means something, yes, but it doesn’t
mean commitment. It only means that you have an alpha now. Tomorrow you might
not have one anymore. You see? Things changed since our grandparents were
young. Marking doesn’t mean mating. I don’t know if that helps clear things out
for you. You should be able to take your own conclusions.”
Marking doesn’t mean mating? Then what are all those freshman omegas doing
talking about it like it’s the ultimate claiming? Baekhyun gives Kyungsoo a
pointed look, roaming his eyes all over his friend's’ body, trying to wonder if
he also hides a mark underneath his clothes.
“Oh, I bit him.” Kyungsoo gestures at Chanyeol, and the alpha grins.
“He bit me.”
“Are you serious?” Sehun asks looking perplexed.
“Of course.” Kyungsoo says as if the other way around is insanity. Turning back
to Baekhyun, Kyungsoo sighs. “Jongdae is right. A mark is not permanent and
people don’t usually see it as a big deal.”
“Then why is Bae Joohyun walking around like she just got engaged to her
boyfriend?” He inquires.
Jongdae snorts, and Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, saying, “Bae Joohyun is sixteen.
You remember the reaction you had to having a boyfriend at that age. You almost
put to risk everything you’d worked so hard for, it was like Joonmyun was the
most important thing in the world.”
That’s true. He nearly drowned in feelings.
“Can I ask something?” Sehun lifts his hand, and Kyungsoo nods. Sehun then
faces Baekhyun. They’ve never interacted much. Sehun once drank Baekhyun’s
juice at lunch, but that’s it. He’s curious to know what Jongdae’s new alpha
has to say. “Did you… Ever talk about what you have? Your relationship? Did you
discuss what you wanted out of it?”
They’ve discussed what Baekhyun wants out of relationships. He talked about his
plan, and he told Yifan about seeing relationships in a different light. He
allowed Yifan to court him, he said ‘yes’, he wanted to date and have a
boyfriend, and Yifan knew that. But… Maybe they’ve failed to put a label on
whatever is happening between them. It wouldn’t be a big deal to some people,
but it is to Baekhyun. Last time he checked they were walking towards
boyfriends, but did they get there already? Did he miss it? He thinks about
Yifan’s hand on his neck, the alpha’s eyes on him, radiating fondness and
admiration. He thinks about the way Yifan makes him feel, how his insides feel
like they’re on fire. He thinks of how Yifan talks about him as if he’s the
world’s 8th wonder.
Suddenly, flashes from the moment he was in Yifan’s arms return to him. He
remembers being pulled to the alpha, he remembers giving in, he remembers
submitting and wanting Yifan more than he’s ever wanted before. Baekhyun
remembers the words that left his mouth when he was high with arousal. Alpha he
said. And that was when Yifan stopped, and bit him.
The memory makes him shiver.
Maybe they should have talked about it.
Kyungsoo’s voice breaks into his thoughts. “Baekhyun, you’re entitled to your
own feelings. If you don’t want to be in this kind of relationship, you don’t
have to. If you don’t want to see Yifan again, you don’t have to. We’ll
personally tell him to leave you alone, if that’s what you want. You could tell
him yourself.”
Baekhyun thinks that he doesn’t wanna see Yifan now, but doesn’t want to stop
seeing him altogether. He doesn’t think he could.
“You don’t have to walk around with that mark if you don’t want,” his friend
continues. “There’s a cream… An ointment you can use. It’s actually designed
for bites that pierce the skin, to help healing and prevent infections, but it
works perfectly to accelerate the fading.”
An ointment. To accelerate the fading. Baekhyun absently cups the bite, staring
at his friend.
“We can go out and get it right now. Chanyeol will drive us to the drug store.
Won’t you?”
The alpha nods, hair flopping. “Definitely.”
Does he want to get rid of the mark? Yifan’s mark? He should want this, right?
Baekhyun did flee from his apartment without sparing him a second glance. His
phone has been incessantly vibrating in his pocket. Yifan must be worried,
messaging him, wanting to know what happened. Baekhyun had to leave, his mind
was foggy with doubt. He needed to think straight. He still does.
There’s a lot he needs to consider, but one thing he knows for sure: Baekhyun
doesn’t want to get rid of the mark.
“I don’t want the cream,” he says, lacing his voice with finality.
“Are you sure, Baek?” Jongdae checks.
His breath has evened, the tears have stopped falling. Baekhyun is not shaking
anymore. Making sure to look right into Jongdae’s eyes, he says, “I’m sure.”
 
Turns out that Kyungsoo really cooked those vegetables for Jongdae. They heat
some for Baekhyun and talk about the most frivolous things while he eats.
Baekhyun thinks that their attempts to humor him are precious, and senses the
sullen look slowly being wiped off his face. Jongdae lets him sleep on the
couch, and Baekhyun is so, so tired that his body succumbs to sleep more
quickly than expected.
                                      {x}
It’s a Saturday. Laundry day. Also the last day of the year, which means that
Baekhyun has a date with Yifan scheduled.
Chanyeol drives him back to the dorm building as soon as they finish breakfast.
Kyungsoo and Jongdae offer to spend the morning with him, help him with his
laundry, but Baekhyun reassures them that he’s fine, and sends them away. After
all, what bad thing could happen? It’s Saturday. It’s laundry day.
He takes a quick shower and puts on his favorite sweat pants and shirt, forcing
himself to take his stuff to the laundry room. Not doing it today means a whole
week of dirty socks and stinky underwear. There is no line at the laundry room,
seeing that most dorm residents went back home for the holidays. Baekhyun is
the only one there. Well, until Yixing comes in.
“I forgot to buy detergent, do you think I could borrow yours?” The alpha
smiles bashfully. Baekhyun’s already put all his stuff in the machine and
there’s still plenty of detergent left.
Hopping on top of an unused washing machine, Baekhyun says, “Yeah, go ahead.”
“Thanks!” Yixing chirps, excitedly separating his clothes into piles of socks
and shirts. He looks so content and willing to be productive. Baekhyun feels
tired just watching him move around.
“Did you have a good Friday?”
“Ah, yes,” the other answers, smiling at Baekhyun. “Why, you didn’t?”
Snorting, the omega shrugs. He wouldn’t know how to start talking about his
Friday.
“What?” Yixing clicks a machine on and the thing wriggles to life. The alpha
then walks towards Baekhyun. “You went out with your guy, didn’t you? You smell
like him. A lot. And I see your relationship progressed.”
He ignores the warmness spreading on his cheeks. Yixing is obviously talking
about the undeniable bite on Baekhyun’s neck.
“I...” he starts carefully, watching Yixing’s face shift from worry to
surprise. “I don’t know how I feel about it.”
“Why?” Yixing asks, fingers playing with the fabric of Baekhyun’s sweats.
“He caught me by surprise.”
Yixing’s hands stop, and his head snaps up. “Did he force you into something?”
“He didn’t. I wanted to be with him, but…” The way Yixing’s nostrils flare and
his eyes watch Baekhyun attentively indicate that he should address this
carefully. “We never talked about the mark and I don’t know how I feel about
it. So when he did it, I didn’t know what to think of it.”
Yixing studies him for a while. “Baekhyun, you know how I feel about you. I
didn’t pursue you because you didn’t want me to. I respected your decision. But
if you end up at the hands of some asshole--”
Jumping off the machine, Baekhyun stands in front of Yixing. “I need to figure
out some things. Like if this guy is an asshole, or if I just tend to overreact
and over analyze everything.”
Yixing sighs, and the creases between his eyebrows soften. “You know you can
talk to me whenever you need, right?”
Baekhyun smiles, and Yixing’s eyes travel down to his neck, focusing on the
spot he knows is purple. The alpha lifts his hand, touching the tips of his
fingers to the bruise. Baekhyun flinches, and Yixing meets his eyes. The sound
of the laundry room door being pushed open calls their attention.
Yifan stands right there, only a few steps away from Baekhyun and Yixing.
“Baekhyun,” Yifan’s voice comes a little weak, a little surprised. He takes a
step forward, knitted eyebrows and parted lips. His mouth twitches, and his
eyes fall on Yixing. They remain on Yixing for quite a while, so long that
Baekhyun feels self-conscious, removing his friend’s hands from him.
Yixing looks affronted, and Baekhyun panics for a second.
The silence stretches for far too long, and Baekhyun is starting to get antsy.
The two alphas are assessing each other, neither of them daring to break eye
contact. Perhaps Baekhyun should interrupt before it becomes something else.
“What are you doing here?” He asks Yifan. “How did you get in?”
Yifan averts his eyes from Yixing, settling them on Baekhyun. “There was no one
at the front, I just came in and asked for you. Some boy told me he saw you
walking in here.”
Baekhyun folds his arms and remains silent.
Yifan blinks at him. “I need to talk to you. Alone.”
The air is thick with tension, and Baekhyun can sense Yixing growing stiff next
to him. He makes no mention of leaving.
“You can speak,” Baekhyun says.
More silence. Yifan is eyeing Yixing, his jaws clenched. It’s his voice that
breaks the silence. “So that’s the alpha I keep smelling on you.”
His words surprise Baekhyun. “What?”
“That alpha,” Yifan repeats, pointing his chin at Yixing. “I’ve smelled him on
you. I never felt like I had the right to inquire about it, but putting a face
to a scent leaves me quite curious.”
Of course. Baekhyun’s slept on the same bed as Yixing. They’ve touched, hugged,
sat too close for comfort. To Baekhyun, those moments never meant anything
other than sheer friendship, but perhaps it wasn’t the same for his companion.
Yixing did have feelings for him after all. Baekhyun is suddenly feeling dumb
for never considering Yixing’s scent sticking to him.
“He lives in the building. We’re close friends,” is all he says. It’s the
truth.
Yifan nods. “He’s also interested in you.”
Yixing shifts. Baekhyun watches him move to stand a few inches ahead, voice
loud and steady when he faces Yifan to say, “You really are an asshole.”
Quickly pulling his friend back, Baekhyun stops Yifan from advancing with a
hand on his chest. Yifan looks pissed, and Yixing is uncharacteristically
annoyed. He releases Yixing and pushes Yifan back, putting a good two meters of
distance between those two.
Baekhyun stops, looking up at Yifan. The alpha faces him, and the defiance
disappears from his eyes. “You don’t have the right to come in here and
question me. You don’t own me.”
Yifan’s heart is beating incredibly fast against Baekhyun’s palm. “Is he the
reason why you left last night?”
“No, Yifan.” Baekhyun says. “You bit me. That’s why I left.”
Yifan stands there, his mouth open as if he’s about to speak, but no words
being uttered. He’s speechless.
“I,” the alpha tries. “I… I thought we were on the same page about that.”
“Why? Because I moaned for you?” Baekhyun is surprised in how steady he sounds.
It’s not something he ever thought he would say, but there it is.
Suddenly Yifan looks pained, and he sighs, both hands gripping at his hair in a
sign of complete despair. Baekhyun’s heart stutters. “I don’t know what you
want from me, Baekhyun.” Yifan says. “I’m sorry, I-- I didn’t mean to hurt you…
I didn’t mean to be an asshole. I never meant to be an asshole, but with you it
seems that’s all I know how to be.”
Baekhyun wants to tell him he’s wrong. He’s not always an asshole. He’s… He’s
just…
Is it really Yifan? Is it only him? He’s been an asshole before, and he might
have acted in ways Baekhyun disapproved, but does Baekhyun want to push him
away every time he slips?
“Tell me what you want from me, Baekhyun,” Yifan pleads. There’s honesty,
worry, regret in his eyes. They look tired. “I won’t guess anymore.”
He can’t. Baekhyun tells him, I can’t, because his thoughts are all over the
place. Maybe it was too early for him, maybe he shouldn’t have let his
frustration take over. Maybe he’s just scared of this thing inside him that
keeps growing and growing, this massive thing that needs and wants Yifan so
much. Maybe he’s just broken, and he can’t love like everyone else.
Yifan lowers his eyes, biting on his lower lip. He nods. “I’ll give you space.
You know where to find me if you want me.” He looks up. “But if you decide that
you want me, please be sure that you really do.”
He stares at Baekhyun for few seconds, then turns around and walks out of the
laundry room. The sounds of washing machines working were never so loud in
Baekhyun’s ears.
 
Baekhyun watches the fireworks on Yixing’s small tv. He looks at the clock. 00:
15. It’s a new year.
                                      {x}
It’s a bit cold in the dorms, so all three of them stay curled under many of
Baekhyun’s blankets. He shares two with Kyungsoo, his head lying on his
friend’s lap as the beta runs his fingers through Baekhyun’s hair, caressing.
Chanyeol, on the other hand, has two blankets thrown over his shoulders, both
legs wrapped by his long arms.
When Kyungsoo texted him announcing that he was coming over, Baekhyun grunted
and thrashed on the bed, not feeling like being company to anyone. However, the
minute Kyungsoo and his boyfriend walked in, Baekhyun attached himself to them
in a surprising display of need.
He didn’t have time to process how lonely he’s feeling. It’s weird. This is how
things were before Yifan barged into his life -- Baekhyun going around his
business, Kyungsoo and Jongdae with him playing games and studying. But now
everything is different. He’s got a scholarship but is short a job, his friends
have boyfriends, and there’s an alpha-shaped slot in his life that’s
uncomfortably empty.
As they sit and get warmer, Kyungsoo tells tales of their dates, the disastrous
attempt Chanyeol made at surprising him with a gift hidden inside a dessert
(Kyungsoo almost ate the small star brooch), and the funnier the stories are,
the farther Baekhyun is from what’s troubling his mind.
He should have folded his clothes, he should have vacuumed his room, he should
have gone out and bought more detergent and water, he should have cleaned his
desk. But all Baekhyun can do is sit around and get lost in his thoughts,
wondering and pondering and worrying. And checking his phone. Yifan hasn’t sent
him a single text since the 29 messages asking why Baekhyun had left in a
hurry. Now that they’re gone Baekhyun realizes how used to them he was, and how
much he misses Yifan’s daily reports and silly selfies.
When the subject of Kyungsoo and Chanyeol’s dates subdues, the beta carefully
asks how Baekhyun’s been doing.
“Fine,” he lies. He knows he didn’t sound very convincing, and the silence that
follows indicates that Kyungsoo isn’t convinced.
“Did you talk to him?”
That couldn’t be considered talking. Confrontation, perhaps. “He came over the
next day. Found me in the laundry room with Yixing.” Baekhyun blinks, and
Kyungsoo’s thumb brushes over the back of his ear. “Asked me if Yixing was the
reason I left.”
“You smell like Yixing sometimes.” Chanyeol mentions.
“Yifan pointed that out. Then I told him that the reason I left was the bite.
He didn’t seem to understand why I was upset, though.”
“Did he tell you why he did it?” Kyungsoo asks.
“He… Thought we were on the same page about it.”
Humming, Kyungsoo shifts, adjusting Baekhyun’s head on his lap. “Were you? I
mean, he seems to believe this is going somewhere. Is that what you want? A
serious relationship?”
That was never the doubt, Baekhyun is sure about wanting a relationship.
“I guess so,” he mumbles in response.
“Have you thought about the mark? How you feel about it?”
Baekhyun was satisfied with the shape their relationship was taking, and he
knew what was the next step. However, he hadn’t considered being marked. He
should have. He understands now that it was meant to act as the confirmation of
their status, and perhaps, if they had previously discussed what they are,
maybe the mark would have come up.
“I think I understand it a bit better now.” That’s not all. Baekhyun sits up,
Kyungsoo’s hand falling from his head. “But… You know, I’ve never given much
thought to the fact that he’s older than me. I’ve never felt intimidated by
going out with a twenty-three year old guy. Yes, I have insecurities, but they
are never related to his age. But… I don’t know, when he bit me… It was the
first time that I felt younger, like reality weighed upon me.”
Kyungsoo watches him silently, Chanyeol doesn’t move a muscle.
Baekhyun inhales, lowering his eyes. “I’m inexperienced. And perhaps they way I
acted around him compelled him to forget. I don’t have parents nagging about
getting home too late, I have my own money. I know I’m not like most
teenagers.”
“You’re independent,” Chanyeol adds. Both Baekhyun and Kyungsoo turn to face
him, and the alpha offers Baekhyun a tiny smile. “You’ve never really felt like
a teenager to me, Baek. It’s weird, I think the fact that you can take care of
yourself makes us look at you and see someone a bit older.” He shrugs. “I mean,
you aced life! You managed to do all these amazing things like memorize
Chemistry equations and get a scholarship to SNU? Kyungsoo told me the amount
of money you managed to save, like, what the fuck?”
Baekhyun blushes, biting back a smile when Chanyeol grins.
“Twenty-three-year-olds got nothing on you,” he finishes.
Before Baekhyun can say anything, Kyungsoo touches his boyfriend’s thigh, pride
shining on his face. “He can be smart sometimes, can’t he?”
They laugh, and Baekhyun is pretty sure he can feel half the weight that’s
settled on his back being lifted.
“When you feel ready,” Chanyeol says, “talk to Yifan hyung. If you think you
and him can build something real, maybe it’s worth giving it a shot.”
                                      {x}
How many people in Baekhyun’s life truly loved him? How many people were close
enough to be trusted? How many stayed with him?
He’s got no friends left from his days at the Children’s Home, only a teacher
that occasionally e-mails him. He’s got no friends left from middle school. Of
course, growing up Baekhyun wasn’t alone. He wasn’t struggling with loneliness
or the lack of interest by other people. But how many of those people who
helped him when he was a child have stuck with him till now?
Going over memories from that time, he tries to remember when was the first
time he really felt love. When was the first time Baekhyun felt so warm and
filled with happiness and comfort that he thought he could burst. Did he feel
it at all? How can he be sure that it was love he was experiencing?
He remembers getting a Christmas gift from one of the moms who visited the
orphanage regularly. He was 6, maybe 7? On that particular Christmas, that mom
took him on her lap and read him a story. She hugged him, and pet him, and
kissed his cheeks and told him what a smart boy he was for recognizing so many
words and being able to use them properly. When the story was over, she handed
Baekhyun a small, wrapped box. It was a small action figure, one of the kids
from the orphanage took it from Baekhyun and he never saw it again. That was
the first Christmas gift that was his own. The kids would get presents from the
teachers and caregivers like new clothes and shoes, but somehow they never
really felt exclusive. But that action figure… That was precious. Baekhyun
remembers staring at it and marvelling at how precious it was, how no other kid
had one like that, how that mom had chosen him to gift. He felt pretty special.
And as she hugged him goodbye and wished him all the happiness in the world
because he deserved it, Baekhyun thinks he felt a little bit loved as well.
Baekhyun felt love when Jongdae and Kyungsoo bought him a cake on his
seventeenth birthday. He felt loved every time his friends held him and wiped
his tears. That had to be love.
There might not be a lot of people in his life, but there are people and
there’s love.
Maybe he needs to stare at it in the face to be sure that he knows what it is,
to reassure himself that he’s felt it before, and that there is no need to shy
away from it.
                                      {x}
Fight Club is a great movie. Baekhyun thinks he’s watched it for three days
straight now. His Netflix account keeps suggesting titles, trying to get him to
pick some other movie, but he faithfully turns to Tyler Durden. Maybe it’s the
boredom. Who knows.
That’s probably why Jongdae and Kyungsoo barge into his dorm room one Saturday
afternoon and claim that they’re taking him out.
“But I have a date with Tyler!” Baekhyun protests, clutching his pillow. He
knows his hair's a mess and he probably forgot to brush his teeth last night.
“No, you have a date with us.” Jongdae pushes his laptop closed and forcefully
drags Baekhyun out of bed. He really doesn’t want to leave. It’s cold outside
and his bed is warm and comfy. His bed has so much love to give…
“We’re going ice skating.” Kyungsoo says, face blank. Baekhyun blinks at him.
Ice skating? He certainly will not leave his bed to go exercise. “Forget it,”
he says, quickly finding shelter under his sheets. From his cocoon, he can hear
sighs.
“Baekhyun if you don’t get up this instant I’m calling Chanyeol over and he’ll
pluck you up and throw you in the shower.”
 
That’s how Baekhyun finds himself in the middle of an ice rink, surrounded by
children and parents and old people trying to have a good time. Christmas is
over, why is there so much happiness around? He’s feeling atypically cranky,
and as he watches his friends and their boyfriends joyfully skating ahead of
him, Baekhyun wishes that they trip over their own feet.
A group of kids fly past him and he almost loses his balance. Lucky for him,
Baekhyun’s near the edges, so he grabs the safety bar and prevents an ugly
fall. Pursing his mouth, Baekhyun continues skating (on his own, it’s important
to mention). He can’t see the meaning of his presence if his friends keep
acting as if they’re on a double date and Baekhyun is just one of those creepy
lonely people doing stuff they’re not supposed to do alone.
He’s about to go have a seat by the bleachers when someone approaches him.
“Hey,” says a boy. He looks older than Baekhyun, albeit not much. A bit taller,
though. Black hair falling softly over his forehead. The silver necklace he’s
wearing is the scientific symbol for beta. “Why the frown? We’re skating, you
should look happier.”
What? The nerve! As if this dude is entitled to tell Baekhyun when to be happy.
He’s going to be sour when he wants to be sour!
Snorting, Baekhyun looks ahead. “Says who?” He skates towards the bleachers,
the black haired boy following him.
“Me. I can’t have fun while you’re looking this grumpy.”
Removing his skates, Baekhyun darts to the bleachers on his socks. It’s with
surprise that he notices the beta dude mimicking his actions.
“Look, why don’t you go bother someone else? I don’t want company,” Baekhyun
says.
Taking a seat next to him, Black-haired Beta heaves a long sigh. “Everyone else
is having a good time. You’re the only one who’s looking unhappy.”
“Exactly. That’s why you should go talk to one of those happy people.”
“But you need to be cheered up.”
Baekhyun really doesn’t think this guy is funny, but he can’t stop a chuckle
from escaping. Black-haired Beta is looking at him expectantly, as if he’s
waiting for Baekhyun to shift into a bright happiness bubble.
“What are you, the Happiness Gnome?” Baekhyun inquires.
This seems to catch the dude’s interest. He scratches his chin thoughtfully
before facing Baekhyun once more. “I like how that sounds. The Happiness Gnome.
My name is Junki, but you can call me that if you want.”
Junki. Somehow Baekhyun thinks it suits him. For no particular reason.
He folds his arms on his chest, maintaining his grumpy stance. “Well, Junki, go
be someone else’s gnome. I don’t need one.”
A few seconds of silence later, Junki clears his throat. “Tell you what. If I
manage to cheer you up, you’ll tell me your name.”
It’s definitely boredom (maybe some curiosity) that makes Baekhyun answer yes.
He watches Junki as the beta retrieves his phone from a pocket and taps
resolutely. He coos at whatever he sees on the screen, turning it around to
show it to Baekhyun.
It’s a picture of a toddler cuddling with a puppy. Ridiculously adorable.
So adorable that Baekhyun coos, unable to refrain the smile that spreads across
his face. Junki vibrates next to him.
“That’s better!” He pockets his phone. “That’s my niece. She’s the cutest,
isn’t she?”
“She really is,” Baekhyun answers. And considering he made a deal… “I’m
Baekhyun.”
Junki hums, testing the name on his tongue. “Cool name. Now, Baekhyun, will you
tell me what got you so grumpy today?”
What he should do is get up and leave this dude enjoy his own happiness. It’s
boredom (perhaps curiosity) that makes him answer. Baekhyun tells about his
friends forcing him out of bed and then ignoring him in favor of having fun
with their boyfriends. He tells him about Yifan and how much he misses him, but
also talks about the marking issue and how confused he is about everything.
Baekhyun knows he shouldn’t give this stranger so much information, but
something about Junki seems trustworthy. Perhaps the fact that he’s a beta? No,
that’s not it. There are jerk betas around. But Junki… He really does look like
a Happiness Gnome.
"So, those are Yifan's teeth on your neck," Junki says after Baekhyun finishes
narrating the events of the past weeks. The beta stretches his neck, inspecting
the bite. "That's a pretty mark, to be honest. He really managed to sink all
his teeth on you."
Baekhyun frowns, absently running his fingers on the mark. He wonders if Junki
is one of those people who talk before thinking.
“I think a bite means what you want it to mean.” Junki mentions, index finger
tapping his chin. “If you want it to mean commitment, it’s up to you and your
mate. Or boyfriend. But of course you need to talk about it first.”
Well, yeah, Baekhyun knows they failed on that.
The Gnome continues, “You don’t have to decide if you want a mark right now.
Everyone has their own time.
“And about your friends… People get silly and cheesy when they’re in love. That
doesn’t mean they’re ignoring you. If you’re feeling lonely, tell them you’re
feeling lonely. I’m sure they’ll want to cheer you up.”
With a pang of sadness, Baekhyun turns to the ice rink, seeing that both
Jongdae and Kyungsoo are still flailing around, pirouetting and giggling with
their alphas. They did help him that night when Baekhyun just showed up on
Jongdae’s doorstep utterly and completely messed up.
"If you feel like you need a distraction from the alpha, you could always do
stuff on your own as well,” Junki says. “Like... Take Piano lessons! Have you
ever thought about learning how to play the piano?"
It's funny, Baekhyun's thought about learning the piano once or twice during
middle school when he went to a school that offered music classes. He dismissed
those, though, in favor of being a part of the Astronomy Club.
"I don't think I can afford piano lessons,” he says.
"That's alright. Just try something simpler. Like... Learning how to draw. That
doesn't require much that you don't already have."
True. Baekhyun does have a lot of empty notebooks and pencils. He needed those
for CSAT studying sessions. Although he's never had artistic skills, perhaps
taking a few minutes everyday to doodle something here and there would actually
cheer him up. He could try to visit Zitao's DeviantArt for inspiration...
"Are you thinking about it?" Junki asks, probably prompted by Baekhyun's
silence. "Look, I would totally accompany you in your artistic endeavours, but
I'm going back to Busan tomorrow. I only came to Seoul to visit my sister."
"Oh?" Baekhyun turns to look at him. "Are you from Busan?"
"Ah, yes. I've been trying to move here for years, but no one wants to hire
me." The Happiness Gnome lets out an oddly unhappy smile. Baekhyun has the
strangest urge to cheer him up.
"I'm sure you could find a nice job somewhere."
"I could find a job, but not a nice one." Junki sighs, shaking his head.
Suddenly, his mood is back to Happy and he flashes one of those brilliant
smiles he's been smiling at Baekhyun this whole time. "Say, Baekhyun, how old
are you?"
He feels a bit bashful saying, "Eighteen," and quickly adds, "Nineteen in May!"
Junki gasps, both hands clasping over his mouth, eyes wide. "Oh child, you
really need guidance in life. I can't just abandon you now that I've found you,
poor creature. No wonder you're so unhappy."
Baekhyun squints. "Am I unhappy because I'm a teenager?"
"Of course!" Junki exclaims. "Adolescence is the angstiest life phase! I
remember walking around in my long, white bangs feeling very visual kei while
crying about the woes of life. You need help, Baekhyun!"
Um. Baekhyun never really digged visual kei, and he never dyed his hair. He
doesn't think they had the same experiences in adolescence.
"Ok, I have a plan! I'll give you my e-mail address!" Junki says. "Anytime you
feel sad, send me a message and I'll compile my favorite cat videos!"
In a minute, Junki types his e-mail address in Baekhyun's notes app and
convinces Baekhyun to give his own address. They agree to exchange e-mail
occasionally, even with Baekhyun honestly confessing that he's probably going
to forget. Junki says he'll remember. He has to. It's for Baekhyun's sake.
When they part ways with the beta saying he needs to be home in time for dinner
with his family, Baekhyun is surprised to admit that he really feels a bit less
grumpy. He's able to watch the group of kids fly past people without feeling
murderous. He sees Jongdae and Sehun attempting a peck while skating and
instead of groaning in disgust, Baekhyun chuckles.
The Happiness Gnome was indeed effective.
 
He leaves the rink without waiting for his friends. It feels unfair to
interrupt their outing just because he's hungry. He retrieves his shoes and
goes out seeking something nice and warm to eat. It doesn't take him long to
find a Takoyaki stand, and although Baekhyun is not
very fond of Takoyaki, he orders a portion.
When his order is ready, Baekhyun pays for it and finds a quiet place to sit.
He stays there for a while, eating his food and watching busy people run from
one place to another, parents pulling kids by the arms, tourists taking
pictures... It's peaceful.
Well, it's peaceful until Jongdae's voice booms next to him, attracting
attention from all corners. Baekhyun watches him stride towards him with wide
eyes.
"BYUN BAEKHYUN WHY DID YOU LEAVE US THERE?"
"I didn--"
"YOU LEFT! WE BROUGHT YOU BECAUSE WE WANTED YOU TO HAVE FUN, BUT NO! YOU HAD TO
ESCAPE TO BROOD IN A DARK PLACE!"
"I'm not brooding, I'm just eating."
"AND WHY DIDN--"
"Jongdae, stop screaming," Kyungsoo says before turning to Baekhyun. "I saw you
talking to some guy at the bleachers. Who was that?"
"Ah, that was the Happiness Gnome." Baekhyun smiles in a way that he knows it's
silly.
Chanyeol frowns. "The what?"
"Happiness Gnome."
"Yes, I got that, but... What?"
Seriously, why would someone as smart as Kyungsoo agree to go out with such a
dimwit. Baekhyun rolls his eyes. "He approached me because he thought I looked
grumpy. Said he had to cheer me up."
"Was he flirting with you?" Sehun asks.
"No." Baekhyun inhales. "He's a genuinely good person who thought someone
needed attention. His name is Junki. He gave me his e-mail address."
Jongdae is looking at him as if Baekhyun is telling a particularly offensive
story. "So a stranger managed to cheer you up, but we didn't?"
He's feeling pretty at ease, so the bite in Jongdae's words do not faze him.
Baekhyun simply takes another breath and answers, "Well, it's not like you were
trying. You were skating with your boyfriends and I was being knocked down by
little kids."
Jongdae looks like he wants to answer, but ends up shutting his mouth. The
others just watch Baekhyun.
"Look, it's not your responsibility to look after me," he continues. "I know
you feel bad for me and my inability to do relationships, but you don't have to
drag me along on your double dates."
"This wasn't supposed to be a double date, Baekhyun." Kyungsoo mentions. "We
just wanted to hang out, that's all. You're our friend, you hang out with us."
Sighing, Baekhyun eats another takoyaki. "I know that," he says, mouth full.
Sehun winces. "I'm just explaining that I left because I was on my own and
hungry, and you were having fun. I didn't leave out of anger or anything, I
just wanted to get food."
"Please chew first," Kyungsoo says. "And we don't feel bad for you. We just
didn't want you to be home feeling upset."
Yes, he understands that. Baekhyun knows that he has good friends. They might
forget about him in face of their boyfriends, but they're great.
Baekhyun eats the last of his takoyaki and stands up. "I'm fine, guys. I'm
really ok." He chews, and swallows. "Take me back to my dorm room, Tyler is
still waiting for me."
                                      {x}
Baekhyun is returning from a quick trip to the book market -- he had a few old
copies to sell -- intending to make his way back to the solitude of his room
when something calls his attention. Someone, to be more exact. A tall, skinny
figure sitting on the couch at the dorm’s reception. Baekhyun looks the
figure’s way, stomach dropping when he finds Yifan looking right back at him.
“Oh, yeah, Baekhyun, there’s someone here to see you.” The girl at the front
desk is kind enough to inform. Baekhyun would thank her if he wasn’t completely
frozen in his spot.
He was not expecting to see Yifan today.
The alpha stands up, rubbing his palms on the fabric of his white pants. His
hair is a bit longer, pointing in every direction. His face still makes
Baekhyun want to cry.
“Hey,” Yifan says in a weak voice, his eyes falling onto a very particular spot
on Baekhyun’s neck. He feels awfully conscious.
“Hey.”
“I know I said I would give you space, but I need to talk to you. Please?”
Yifan leads him outside, just out the door to get a little privacy, and
Baekhyun still feels stunned. They stare at each other for what it feels like
ages. Baekhyun wouldn’t be able to speak if he wanted, anyways, he is stunned.
Yifan takes a deep breath, blinking at the ground before facing Baekhyun once
again. “I wanted to,” he starts, voice a bit wobbly. He’s nervous. “I wanted to
apologize. For how I acted. I’m sorry I bit you. I didn’t understand why you
were so upset at first, but… But now I do. And I feel like an asshole. I’m
sorry, Baekhyun. I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have brought upon you
a situation you were not comfortable with.”
Something melts inside Baekhyun (maybe his heart?). He lets out all the air
he’s been holding without realizing. Yifan looks so distressed, so anxious.
Baekhyun averts his eyes, focusing on the leaves of the nearby tree. “I didn’t
know if I was comfortable with it or not.”
“That should have been a good indication to not do it,” Yifan says. “I should
have known. I should have asked you, I… I know better than to act on impulse.”
They both acted on impulse that night, pushed by their undeniable instincts.
Baekhyun’s never wanted to submit to anyone before, and he would have gladly
given himself to Yifan. He wanted to give himself to Yifan. If the bite hadn’t
happened, it’s possible they would go too far and Baekhyun would have triggered
his first heat, something he definitely did not want.
“We’re both at fault, Yifan,” Baekhyun says, gazing at the alpha. Yifan
swallows. “I was vague… About us. We’ve talked about relationships in a general
sphere.”
“This is not your fault.” Yifan shakes his head, taking one step in Baekhyun’s
direction. He doesn’t reach out to him, he doesn’t make any move to touch
Baekhyun. Baekhyun’s breath hitches anyway. “You trusted me. I should have been
more careful.”
They both should have been more careful. Baekhyun inhales, lowering his eyes
for a second.
“I accept your apologies,” he says. “People mess up sometimes. We messed up.”
And there it is again. That look. It’s like Baekhyun is shining brighter than
any star in this galaxy. Like there’s nothing more precious than him. It warms
up his skin, ignites that fire inside him, makes his heart stutter. Baekhyun
wants to touch him, tell him it’s alright, he doesn’t hate him. He still likes
Yifan the same way he liked him a month ago.
“Thank you,” Yifan breathes out, both hands rubbing on his face. “Thank you so
much.”
When he looks down at Baekhyun, the omega offers him a smile. Baekhyun can tell
that things won’t immediately fall back into their rightful places, they’re
both still a bit wary of themselves. But at least Yifan Baekhyun knows that
Yifan understands it, and that he cares enough to feel bad and apologize.
They’ll fall back together. Baekhyun knows they will. In due time.
                                      {x}
There's stew for breakfast at the dorm cafeteria this morning. It's a Monday,
they usually get fried rice, so Baekhyun doesn't know what's with the sudden
change in the menu. He sits with Yixing as the alpha eats, the smell of the
stew not sitting well with Baekhyun. He usually likes stew, so perhaps that
morning he isn't really feeling it. Deciding to just drink tea, Baekhyun drags
Yixing to the market with him in search of something to eat. There's nothing
interesting, though. He ends up getting a few cookies, some bottles of water,
but nothing substantial enough to be called breakfast.
As they walk through the alleys, Baekhyun feels a bit uneasy, uncomfortable. A
sudden tiredness that he feels all over his body, an urge to just go home and
lay down. He hurries, paying for the stuff quickly and leaving the market even
before looking at the cleaning products. He's out of detergent, but that has to
be taken care of some other day.
"Hey," Yixing says when they're almost back at the dorm building. "Are you
feeling sick?"
Rubbing a hand over his belly, Baekhyun makes a face. "Bit. Why?"
Yixing then sniffs. Pauses. "You smell a bit different."
Frowning, Baekhyun glances at him, "Different as in there's someone else's
smell on me? Because I spent some time with Sehun and Chanyeol the other
day..."
"No no," Yixing shakes his head. The way he assesses Baekhyun leaves the omega
somewhat anxious. "As if you're very, very close to your heat."
Baekhyun's stomach drops. His heat. His first heat. The thing that’s very
important, but he keeps forgetting about.
Shit. Oh shit.
But wait, is it really near? He does feel strange, but it could be the flu? It
doesn’t need to be his heat, it’s not even--
Oh yes. Two months and a few weeks, she said. Two months and a few weeks.
"You should stay home," Yixing says matter-of-factly. "If it hits while you're
out it might be a problem."
They return to the dorm and Baekhyun locks himself in his room, cookies and
water forgotten on the floor in favor of freaking out underneath his blankets.
His heat. His first heat is coming. Well, he knew it was supposed to reach some
time, but... It's really coming now. He feels sick. Baekhyun has read that an
omega about to get in heat might experience symptoms such as lack of appetite
and nausea.
Should he call Jongdae and ask for support? What could his friend do for him,
anyway? Should he... Should he call the heat carer, Kim Minseok? Is he supposed
to call Kim Minseok only when he's in a bad shape? Shit, why didn't Baekhyun
just save enough money for a bloody alpha shot?
He should distract himself. That's what the Happiness Gnome said he should do,
do stuff on his own, so maybe it will work. If he distracts himself he won't
focus on what’s bothering him. Yes. Distraction. Drawing. He should draw.
Baekhyun knows he's got a few unused notebooks in his closet, he just needs to
search properly.
There’s a lot of shit in his closet that he hasn’t used in months. Stained
shirts and holed socks. Baekhyun finds the notebooks eventually. However, he
also finds something that he’d momentarily forgotten possessing. A red beanie
smelling faintly of alpha.
The smell is not strong, but effective enough in blowing up that fire inside
Baekhyun, its flames licking the walls of his stomach, drawing a whimper out of
him.
His hands and legs are shaking, and Baekhyun suddenly can’t stand anymore.
Stumbling back, he falls on his bed, hands gripping the mattress, mismatched
breathing. What the fuck is this reaction? His legs didn’t give when he was
walking with Yixing, and that’s an alpha. Why would Baekhyun… Why would a
beanie…
He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes and trying to get a hold of himself.
His hands still shake and his legs are still trembly, but Baekhyun manages to
stand. He takes short steps towards the closet, reaching for the red thing.
It feels soft in his hands, almost harmless. Baekhyun inspects the beanie as he
returns to the bed. His stomach doesn’t feel about to burst anymore, so that’s
good, but the scent -- Yifan’s scent -- keeps hitting him right in the face.
It’s nice and familiar, gives him a sense of comfort.
Baekhyun brings it to his nose anyway, inhaling, capturing the essence of the
alpha he hasn’t seen in days. If he closes his eyes, it’s even possible to
imagine Yifan just a few feet from him. He lowers the beanie to his lap,
running both thumbs over its folds. The Happiness Gnome wouldn’t advise
fondling with the belongings of the person you’re trying to be distracted from.
As he looks at the beanie in his lap, Baekhyun wonders if he really wants to be
distracted from Yifan. They haven’t spoken in days, since Yifan’s impromptu
visit to the dorm room with a sad face and apology, and Baekhyun’s never felt
more lonely.
It’s like… It’s like he was ok before Yifan. He was ok with not receiving text
messages everyday, he was ok with not sharing his thoughts with anyone else, he
was totally ok with not receiving hourly selfies. Baekhyun misses it. He misses
all the texts, all the selfies, he misses Yifan. And this stupid beanie. This
stupid red beanie smells just like him and it’s so hard to convince himself
that it’s ok to go on without him.
With the beanie firmly between his fingers, Baekhyun moves to the desk and
opens his inbox, starting a new e-mail.
 
To: Lee Junki (dalgonadaebakk@mail.com)
Subject: HELP!!!!
This is a message for the Happiness Gnome from Baekhyun. We met that day at the
ice rink, do you remember?
Hello!
I don’t know how to say this, but I might be getting into heat. And I found
Yifan’s red beanie, it was in my closet, it’s a long story, and it smells like
him, and my legs are shaking. I don’t understand what happened because I just
came home with my alpha friend and my legs didn’t shake. Why did I react like
this to Yifan’s beanie? PS: The beanie smells like him fyi.
Baekhyun
 
After he hits send, Baekhyun regrets it. He has his suspicions, he thinks he
knows why he reacted like that, but it’s silly… So silly that he needs someone
else to confirm. Such a silly thing, why would he bother someone else about his
uncertainties. Junki did say Baekhyun could e-mail him anytime, but what if
he’s busy? Baekhyun should have just called Jongdae… But what if he’s with
Sehun and Baekhyun interrupts? What if he thinks Baekhyun is stupid, what if--
A new email arrives.
From: Lee Junki (dalgonadaebakk@mail.com)
To: Byun Baekhyun (bbyun02@gmail.com)
Subject: RE: HELP!!!!
Of course I remember you, my poor child. I am glad you sent me this message.
I think we could video-chat, don’t you think? This platform has a video-chat
option, just accept my request and I will call you. See you in a bit. Xx
 
Baekhyun accepts the request, and in less than two minutes he receives a call.
He adjusts himself in front of his camera and answers.
The Happiness Gnome looks just as happy as Baekhyun remembers. His wide grin
and excitation urge a smile out of Baekhyun.
“Hello!” Yells Junki, his face coming too close to the camera. “Hi, it’s good
to see you again!”
“Hello to you too.” Baekhyun waves. “I hope I haven’t bothered you.”
Junki says something unintelligible (Baekhyun suspects it’s his accent?) and
later rolls his eyes. “I was just unpacking. So, will you explain the whole red
beanie thing better? I honestly don’t understand it haha!”
Well. Yes, it’s awkward when there’s someone watching him. Baekhyun tries to
ignore the warmness spreading on his cheeks and clears his throat. “Well,
Yifan… The alpha, you remember--”
“Yeah, I remember.” Junki smiles encouragingly.
“So, Yifan gave me that beanie. He lent it to me, it was his. And it smells a
lot like him. I hadn’t touched it since the day he gave it to me, and the scent
is mild, but it’s still there.” Baekhyun swallows. “I’m just confused as to why
I got a reaction after smelling his scent if I spent a lot of time with an
alpha friend and didn’t get a reaction. Considering I’m experiencing preheat
symptoms, of course.”
Humming, Junki taps his chin. “Didn’t you say you need to wear a scent masker
whenever you’re around him because the last time you didn’t chaos ensued?”
The episode at Beale St. Yes. “That’s correct,” Baekhyun says.
“So there’s your answer,” the beta states. “There’s this amazing thing that
happens, it’s pretty amazing. You might have noticed. When you find a scent
pleasing and recognize it as belonging to a potential mate, you react to it.
Sexually, I mean. As in getting aroused.” Junki grins. “Just being clear in
case you were confused.”
He continues, “You might not have had time to process like, ‘Oh I want into
this person’s pants’, but your body has. It happens every time you’re attracted
to someone.
“However, it doesn’t mean you have to do anything about it. If you don’t feel
comfortable with these feelings, there are suppressants you can take to inhibit
the urges you might have.”
Baekhyun answers after a beat, “I don’t want to inhibit these feelings.”
“Then own them.” Junki gives him a pointed look. “Have you called anyone?”
Baekhyun frowns. “Call anyone? What for?”
“Well, it’s good to have company when you’re having preheat symptoms. You have
omega friends, right?”
“I do. I mentioned them that day.”
“I remember.” Junki folds his arms on his chest, and suddenly, he doesn’t look
so cheerful and smiley. “I also remember you saying that they,” he makes
quotation marks in the air, “forget about you in favor of their boyfriends.”
“Yeah...” Baekhyun feels like he’s about to get lectured.
“While I’m glad you e-mailed me about this, you should also call your friends.
You said they’ve always been there for you, didn’t you? I don’t think it’s fair
of you to expect them to forget about their own lives to focus on you.”
Baekhyun blushes, ashamed. “I didn’t… I don’t expect them to…” He can’t even
finish that sentence. He knows Junki is right. That’s exactly how he’s been
acting.
“You see it, don’t you?” Junki asks. “It’s ok. Just call them. I’m sure they
wouldn’t leave you hanging.”
Is this what parenting feels like? Did the Happiness Gnome just parent
Baekhyun? He feels like he’s been taught a lesson. Yes, maybe he’s been a bit
unreasonable about Jongdae and Kyungsoo now having boyfriends. It’s just… They
were the first ones Baekhyun’s really cared about. It’s stupid admitting that
somehow he feels like he has a claim on them. And it’s not like he’s been
neglected. Jongdae and Kyungsoo have never failed in showing interest in him,
or worrying about him, or being there for him.
“I think I should call you the Conscience Gnome from now on,” Baekhyun says.
Junki chuckles, his eyes reducing to little half-moons. “I’d like to continue
as the Happiness Gnome. I think it suits my charming personality better.”
Alright then. Baekhyun slightly bows. “Thank you for your input, Happiness
Gnome.”
“You’re welcome, my child. Look forward to hearing from you.” Junki waves.
“Good luck!”
Baekhyun waves back, disconnecting the call. Well. That was ok. He stares at
the computer screen, now back to showing his e-mail inbox.
Grabbing his phone from his pocket, Baekhyun types a quick message.
 
The sound of the water boiling on his portable stove is somewhat soothing.
Baekhyun burrows further under his blankets. When Jongdae and Kyungsoo arrived,
they’d made sure to adjust the thermostat to a comfortable temperature.
Baekhyun is neither cold nor warm. He feels just right, not shaky or out of
breath. His eyes are a bit tired, though, and the nausea keeps coming back.
Jongdae says that the tea he’s preparing will help with the sickness.
Baekhyun is surprised that Kyungsoo has also decided to come. Usually betas
react the same way alphas do to omegas in heat, but his friend says that the
preheat phase is ok.
While he watches his friends try to clean up the small messes in Baekhyun’s
diminished room (“You need a clean space,” Jongdae said), Baekhyun shifts,
bringing the hands that were previously resting against his stomach up to his
face. The red beanie smells less and less like Yifan, and Baekhyun wonders if
he should let go of it. It’s clear that he’s rubbing his own scent all over the
thing.
He doesn’t want to let go of it. The beanie brings him ease, he feels as if
letting go of it means going back to trembly legs and shaky hands. Baekhyun
likes to close his eyes and shut everything out, focusing only on the scent
emanating from it. This is everything he needs.
“Baek, the tea is ready.” Jongdae pulls his covers down. “Come on.”
Groaning, Baekhyun pushes himself up, the beanie secure in one hand as the
other grabs the mug offered by his friend. The tea tastes like grass, but it’s
sweet. Jongdae watches him attentively, as if checking if Baekhyun will drink
till the last drop. Once he’s done, Baekhyun gives the mug back to Jongdae,
flopping onto his bed. He clutches the beanie against his chest, eyelids
fluttering closed.
He hears Kyungsoo whisper, “The red hat.”
“He won’t let that thing go,” Jongdae answers.
“I think it smells like the street alpha.”
Heaving a sigh, Baekhyun allows one eye open. “I can hear you.”
The mattress dips, and a hand settles on his calf. “Baek, do you understand
what’s going on here?”
Baekhyun blinks. Well, he thinks he understands it perfectly. The beanie smells
like Yifan, he likes the way Yifan smells. Baekhyun wants to keep hugging it.
“It calms you, doesn’t it?” Jongdae asks, crouching in front of Baekhyun. He
eyes the beanie. “His scent.”
More than calm him. It’s almost an assurance. The confirmation that Baekhyun’s
been seeking. No other scent was ever able to give him this much satisfaction.
“I miss him,” Baekhyun mutters. He caresses the beanie just like he would
caress Yifan if the alpha was next to him. “I really, really miss him.”
Jongdae and Kyungsoo gaze at him in silence, Kyungsoo’s hand rubbing his calf.
He holds the bundle of red fabric closer to his chin, where he can smell it
stronger. “I’d just… Like to be near him. He’s so warm, you wouldn’t believe
how warm he is.”
Just as he closes his eyes, Jongdae’s hand runs through his hair. It feels so
good, he’s so comfortable… And his eyelids are heavy… Perhaps he can just…
Rest…
 
Baekhyun wakes up feeling like he’s hibernated for a thousand years. He rubs
his eyes, noticing that his room is in complete darkness. There’s an incense
lit on his desk, probably one of those incenses that mask the scent of an omega
in heat. Sitting up, Baekhyun checks the window and is greeted by the
nighttime. He’s alone.
He doesn’t feel like flicking the lights on, so Baekhyun just sits on his bed,
basking in the darkness and the nice aroma coming from the incense. He pats the
mattress, ruffling his sheets after the red cloth. It’s under him, and Baekhyun
rescues it quickly, pressing it against his cheek. The scent is too faint,
nearly gone.
Baekhyun grabs his phone from the floor. The clock reads 10:56 PM. It’s late,
but Baekhyun is not sleepy. He just woke up from a nice nap and apparently
Jongdae’s mysterious tea worked wonders in his body. He feels fine. And a bit
hungry, but he’ll take care of that later. He checks his messages.
From: Jongdae
it was late we had to go home
see u tomorrow <3
From: Kyungsoo
We left more of that tea in your mini-fridge. And oh, we lit one of the
incenses just in case it happened in the middle of the night.
Pulling the beanie onto his head, Baekhyun gets up, taking a seat in front of
his computer. The old thing takes a bit long to turn on, and while he waits,
Baekhyun reconsiders what he’s about to do.
Maybe this nap he’s just woken up from was enlightening, maybe it just made it
evident what deep down he was already sure of. His mind has seems clearer, his
senses sharper.
He likes Yifan. Baekhyun wants to be with him, he wants to belong to Yifan, and
he wants Yifan to belong to him as well. Baekhyun doesn’t feel nauseated, he
doesn’t feel tired or shaky. He feels deadly serious about this.
It’s like the preheat symptoms have given him a break, thanks the heavens.
There’s a lot that needs to be taken care of and he could definitely not waste
time lying on a bed.
With his computer up and running, Baekhyun opens his downloaded files. He
checks the last pdf with instructions sent by Safe Cycle and certifies that
he’s doing this right. Baekhyun opens his e-mail and drafts a new message.
 
To: Safe Cycle - Omega Care Center (forms@safecycle.com)
Subject: Service Cancellation
Dear Mr., Ms.
I would like to cancel the heat carer services I paid for. I understand that
there will be no refunds. The cancellation forms were properly filled, please
check the attached file.
Regards,
Byun Baekhyun.
 
It’s a risk he’s taking, but one he’s willing to take responsibility for. He
reads the message three times before hitting send.
It’s done. Well, at least he hopes so. According to the PDF, Baekhyun needed to
submit the cancellation request and await a confirmation e-mail that might take
a few days to arrive. Well, he won’t call Kim Minseok anyway.
Making sure that the beanie stays on his head, Baekhyun exits his room, the
clarity in the hallway distressing his eyes. Baekhyun blinks adjusting to the
light before walking towards the bathroom.
It’s Kyungsoo’s birthday tomorrow. Maybe Baekhyun can surprise him with
something if he’s feeling ok.
Back to his room, Baekhyun grabs those cookies he got earlier in the market and
wolfs them down, drinking a bit more of the tea just to ensure he’ll have a
good night.
He lies down, staring at the big galaxy frame on the wall next to his closet.
It had been tricky to find a good space for such a big painting, considering
that Baekhyun’s walls were covered in shelves. He didn’t want to put it on the
floor, albeit knowing that floor paintings are a new hype. Even if the painting
doesn’t smell like Yifan, it reminds Baekhyun of him, and for now that’s good.
Baekhyun revisits old texts from Yifan, stares at past selfies, sighs at how
good the alpha looks both blond and brunette. Baekhyun was always very fond of
Yifan’s forehead and eyebrows. He would have given them more attention before
if he had known better. As he goes from selfie to selfie, Baekhyun wonders if
Yifan is doing the same. He tries to picture the alpha lying in his bed, phone
in hand as he goes through every single photo Baekhyun’s ever sent him.
Baekhyun wonders if Yifan’s missing him.
It’s 11:30PM. Maybe he should go back to bed. Or take a stroll around the
building. Knock on Yixing’s door and demand company.
Truth is that Baekhyun feels fine, but he doesn’t really want to leave his
bedroom. Not tonight, at least. So he just relaxes against the mattress,
retrieving the beanie from his head. He places it against his chest, giving the
galaxy painting one last glance before closing his eyes.
                                      {x}
According to Kyungsoo, Chanyeol has claimed the night of his birthday as his
own. So Jongdae and Baekhyun get the day.
“I don’t want to know why he wants to have you at night,” Baekhyun says he
slices the small cake they brought for his friend. Kyungsoo hates the happy
birthday song, so they refrain from singing it.
He woke up feeling ok, so Jongdae met him at the dorm and both of them got a
cab for Kyungsoo’s house. It’s been fine so far. Sometimes his head will pound
and his stomach will feel unwell, but overall, Baekhyun is fine.
“I do.” Jongdae wiggles his eyebrows and smirks. “Are you planning on finally
making use of that nice dick? Chanyeol looks like he’s got a big knot on him.”
Sighing, Kyungsoo accepts the cake slice Baekhyun offers him. “Why do you
care?”
“Because!” Jongdae exclaims. “You’re nineteen now, you can get as much sex as
you want without feeling guilty.”
“Do you feel guilty?” Baekhyun asks Jongdae.
The omega shrugs. “Sometimes. Not much.”
Naturally. Speaking of sex…
“I cancelled my heat carer yesterday,” Baekhyun says casually.
The fork Jongdae was using drops on the floor with a loud clank.
“What?” Kyungsoo blinks at him.
They’re watching him so intently that Baekhyun feels scrutinized. He blushes,
repeats, “I cancelled my heat carer yesterday.”
His friends exchange glances. Jongdae asks, “Why did you do that?”
Baekhyun takes a deep breath. He’s tested out these words several times when he
was alone, and none of those times they’ve sounded wrong. “I don’t want a
stranger helping me with my first heat.”
“Are you sure about that, Baek?” Kyungsoo asks. They know that Baekhyun
cancelling his heat care services can only mean one thing.
He thinks about Yifan’s hands on him, the care with how he’s handled Baekhyun.
He thinks about Yifan’s mouth, his scent, the way he smiles at Baekhyun as if
he’s something particularly fascinating.
“Yes. I’m pretty sure.” Baekhyun smiles in reassurance. “I trust him. We might
have had a weird start, a few bumps on the road, but he’s good. He’s really
good, and he likes me. I like him. Chanyeol said that I should give it a chance
if I think we can be something real. I think we can be something real.”
All of a sudden Baekhyun has his arms full of Jongdae (and some cake crumbs).
He chuckles, holding his friend.
“Fuck, I’m so proud of you, Baek,” Jongdae says. “You carrying this red beanie
everywhere was starting to get ridiculous.”
“So, what are you going to do now?” Kyungsoo inquires.
“I have a plan, and you’ll help me. But first I’ll finish eating this cake. And
then I’ll have a sip of that awful tea.”
                                      {x}
They wait for night to fall, then enlist Chanyeol to help when the alpha
arrives to pick Kyungsoo up for their night out. If he’s upset when his
boyfriend asks him to drive them around before their date, he doesn’t let it
show. They stop by the dorm building so Baekhyun can pack a few clothes and
essentials (including the tea and the incenses his friends brought over the
other day) before heading to his final destination.
Kyungsoo pesters him about the consequences of this going wrong the whole way.
He’s thought about the consequences, and he knows he’ll have a hard time if it
doesn’t turn out the way he’s expecting. Especially considering what’s at stake
if it fails. Baekhyun is confident, though. He doesn’t allow doubt to shake his
purpose.
He exits the car, taking into the building in front of him.
Kyungsoo thrusts his head out the window.“Good luck, Baek. I hope you’re doing
the right thing.”
“If it goes wrong I’ll get you an alpha,” Jongdae winks.
Baekhyun rolls his eyes, waving his friends goodbye and walking into the
building. It looks exactly as he remembers, the doorman sitting behind his
counter unworriedly, watching some tv show from a mini tv. Baekhyun greets him,
giving the apartment number. The doorman nods, calling the apartment. He asks
Baekhyun’s name.
He feels a bit anxious as the doorman announces him on the phone, awaiting an
answer. Then, the man nods, telling Baekhyun he’s allowed to go up.
Yifan is already waiting for him with the door open when he reaches his floor.
He’s got surprise painted all over his face, mouth slightly parted, eyebrows
arched. Baekhyun’s heart skips a beat, and he holds his breath for a second.
This is it.
“Hi,” Yifan says, seemingly croaking the word around a lump in his throat. His
voice still makes Baekhyun’s stomach flutter. “When the doorman said your name
I thought he was joking.”
Before Baekhyun can answer, someone else comes out of the apartment.
“Oh, so it really is Baekhyun.” A barefoot Luhan, hugging a huge Doritos bag.
His gaze shifts from Yifan to Baekhyun before humming. “I should take my
leave.” He retreats into the apartment, shuffling around, muttering to himself,
before coming out wearing sneakers. He pushes the Doritos into Yifan’s hands
and quickly bows to Baekhyun before darting to the elevators.
Well.
Pushing past Yifan and into the apartment, Baekhyun rests his backpack on the
floor. Yifan’s scent is so much stronger here, it literally smells like
paradise. He’s not sure if he can pick up the scent in the air because his nose
is a bit more sensitive or because he’s gotten used to it the last few days.
Baekhyun adjusts the beanie in his head.
Last time he was here the memories created weren’t all that great, but Baekhyun
is ready to work on that and create some new ones. Better ones.
He hears the sound of the door shutting behind him. Turning around, he faces
Yifan. The Doritos now rests on a corner table. “I was afraid you wouldn’t be
home. Being a weekday and everything.”
“What are you doing here?” Yifan finally asks, eyes zeroing on the backpack.
“What’s that?”
“I’m staying here,” Baekhyun announces. He tries his best to not let his
anticipation show, to seem calm and serene
First, he frowns. Then, Yifan’s nostrils flare. His eyes widen impossibly, and
he steps away until his back hits a wall. “You’re going into heat.”
Baekhyun clears his throat, folding his arms on his chest. “Soon, yes.”
The alpha shakes his head, staring at Baekhyun incredulously as if the world
has gone mad. He looks legitimately scared. “Baekhyun, you can’t stay here.”
“I’m not leaving, Yifan. I’m staying.” Yifan looks like he’s about to jump out
the window.
Alright. Baekhyun gets it. This is all a little crazy, somewhat absurd. The
whole thing is dangerous, he risked his whole future by cancelling the heat
carer. But somehow… Somehow it feels right? It feels right to share this moment
with Yifan. Baekhyun wants Yifan to be his alpha. And if the marking episode is
any indication, Yifan wants the same thing. They just need to communicate
better.
Yifan blinks at him, still perplexed. He nods after a moment, looking around.
Anywhere but Baekhyun. “If you want to be here I can call your heat carer. I
can go to Luhan’s house, you can stay--”
“I cancelled my heat carer.”
“...What?”
“I don’t want a random stranger,” Baekhyun says, feeling bold enough to take a
few steps closer. Yifan looks down, probably assessing the space between them
now that Baekhyun’s approaching. “I want you. That’s why I’m here.”
“You’re crazy if you think... Not after… Not after what happened, Baekhyun.
You’re not thinking straight, you’re--”
Baekhyun crosses the room in three large strides, placing both palms on either
side of Yifan’s face, urging the alpha to look at him. His heartbeat is
following the rhythm of Yifan’s breathing, and being so close to him, touching
him like this… It’s exhilarating. “Look at me. Look right into my eyes. You’ve
seen an omega in heat before, do I look like I’m in heat now? Do I look like I
can’t make my own decisions?”
Yifan sighs, eyebrows knitting, face contorting in a painful expression.
Baekhyun slides his hands into his hair, revelling in the silky texture, the
way the short strands slide against his skin.
“Once I read an article about omegas living in orphanages in other countries
and they’re not given a choice about who helps them in their first heat. 30% of
them decide to not have any alpha. They go infertile, do you know how sad that
is?”
Yifan lowers his eyes, and Baekhyun continues, “I have a choice, Yifan. I
choose you.”
“Baekhyun…” The alpha moves as if he’s trying to get away from Baekhyun’s hold,
but the gesture is so weak that there’s no real intention behind it.
Baekhyun takes this opportunity to kiss his cheek, the corner of his mouth.
“It’s you, Yifan, I want it to be you. I need it to be you. Don’t tell me I
can’t stay, please.” Baekhyun kisses his chin, his lips, pressing closer to
him. “I like you so much.”
Yifan doesn’t kiss back, doesn’t touch back, but Baekhyun can tell his resolve
is crumbling. “Don’t do this to me, Baekhyun…”
“I want you.” Wrapping his arms around Yifan’s neck, Baekhyun kisses his jaw.
“I want you to be my alpha, please,” he mouths at Yifan’s lips insistently,
coaxing them open. “Kiss me, Yifan.”
It happens slowly, carefully, Yifan’s hands touching his arm, sliding to
Baekhyun’s shoulders. It sends a shiver all the way down the omega’s spine.
Yifan parts his lips in invitation, angling his head so Baekhyun will have
better access. He’s letting Baekhyun take the lead, slowly kissing back. This
is nothing like the last time they kissed. Last time was urgent, mad. This…
This feels like a first kiss. And maybe it is. Maybe they’ve done everything
wrong, maybe they need a restart.
They didn’t have much time together, but the time they had led them here.
Baekhyun will not pretend the last months didn’t happen. He cannot forget all
the good moments he shared with this alpha, all the nice words and gentle
touches. He also doesn’t want to forget the bad ones, they will surely be an
important part of what they can be, and Baekhyun has no doubt they can be
something.
 
An hour later, Baekhyun slouches on the couch, his head leaning back. Yifan is
right next to him, sitting in a position that cannot be good for his back just
so his eyes can be at Baekhyun’s level. They sat in silence for a while,
basking in each other’s company, processing what just happened, what is going
to happen. Then, Baekhyun told Yifan about his days, told him about making a
new friend, buying a cake for Kyungsoo, having his friends take care of him
when the first symptoms of heat appeared. Yifan told him how his days were
spent as well. The broken espresso machine got fixed, but it’s making terrible
coffee. Zitao got a big commission from a stranger, got a lot of money and took
they out for dinner.
Now, they start to breach the subject of ‘them’.
“I’m sorry I said those things about your friend,” Yifan mumbles, scratching
his forehead. Baekhyun’s eyes follow his hand, admiring the way his forehead
glistens. “I shouldn’t have asked if he was the reason you had left that day.
I’m stupid, as you’ve noted. At twenty-three I seem to be as childish as a
toddler.”
“We’re both young.” Baekhyun shrugs. “We’re still learning. I’ve forgiven you
for your stupidity already, so don’t apologize anymore.”
Yifan chuckles, averting his eyes for a second. “Thank you. I promise I’ll be
more careful in the future.”
Baekhyun hums, and focuses on a plant that’s pretty dead on a corner. Didn’t
Yifan notice that the poor thing was thirsty? He should take a look around
later and check if any more living beings were neglected.
“I’d only been in one relationship before meeting you,” Baekhyun says, blinking
at the plant. “And you know how it turned out. All the things I felt, what you
made me feel, the strange reactions I’d get to your scent and your presence…
That was very confusing for a while. Add that to the fact that I was trying to
keep away from relationships because of my plan.”
“The plan,” Yifan says.
“When you appeared, I should have stepped away from you the same way I stepped
away from Joonmyun. I should see you as a threat. To my plan, that is.”
Baekhyun risks a quick glance at Yifan. “But I couldn’t step away. I hardly
tried. It was like… I was tied to you.”
“I felt the same. Like I was tied to you. I had urges I’d never had before. I
acted in a way I’d never acted before. Even if I knew how scenting someone so
strongly worked because of my job, it still seemed foreign. I was desperate to
know you, to be with you. I’m sorry if I scared you with my obsessive texting.
Or that first kiss.”
Baekhyun laughs, rubbing an eye with the heel of his hand in an attempt to hide
his pink cheeks. “So… We’re potential mates, then?”
Yifan smiles, that fondness that melts Baekhyun’s insides pouring right out of
him. “We’re a good match. And I think you’re lovely, and amazing. And I might
be infatuated with you.”
His words make Baekhyun’s stomach somersault, a grin threatening to break free.
He bites on his lower lip to try to contain it. “I might be infatuated with you
as well.”
After giggling like middle schoolers, Baekhyun stretches, taking a look around
the apartment. It’s less organized than he remembers. There is a pair of socks
near the TV set, a couple books on top of the DVD player, and, of course, the
plant.
Baekhyun stands up, walking towards the plant. The poor thing. Baekhyun doesn’t
know what kind of plant it is, but the leaves were not very large. He crouches
in front of it, giving sad pats on the pot. A moment later, he senses Yifan
crouching next to him.
“I forgot it was alive,” he says, and Baekhyun gapes at him. “No, listen! I
only keep plastic plants around here. That one was a gift from Amber. She told
me I needed company. Um.”
It’s a tragic story. Baekhyun doesn’t know why he’s laughing. “You killed
Amber’s gift.”
Yifan snorts, lowering his eyes. “I feel terrible. It was a beautiful plant.”
Baekhyun can guess how beautiful it was. He takes one last look at the plant
before standing up, Yifan following him.
“You’re wearing my red hat,” the alpha says.
“Yes I am.” Baekhyun caresses the beanie on top of his head. “It brought me
comfort. Your scent is wearing off, though.”
“Do you want me to wear it for a few days and then return it to you?” Yifan’s
tone is teasing, but Baekhyun seriously considers the offer.
“Would you?” He squints, and Yifan smiles.
“If that’s what you want.”
Pulling out the beanie, Baekhyun brushes his thumbs over the the red fabric. He
doesn’t need it now that Yifan is right here, but Baekhyun thinks he’s grown
attached to the thing. “Please take good care of it,” he says as he hands it
over.
Yifan promptly wears it. “I’ll make sure it’s happy.”
His head feels oddly empty now that the hat is gone. Running both hands through
his hair, Baekhyun eyes the other. “You know what’s funny?”
“What?”
“I freaked out about the bite, I was so upset about you doing it, and when
Kyungsoo told me we could accelerate the fading with an ointment, I didn’t want
it.” When Baekhyun’s fingers lightly move over the mark on his neck, Yifan’s
eyes follow them. “I wanted to keep your mark. Even though I didn’t like to be
facing an unexpected situation.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
“I told you to stop apologizing.” Baekhyun rolls his eyes, gently tugging the
fabric of Yifan’s shirt.
They gaze at each other for a few seconds, Baekhyun’s hand lingering on Yifan.
He pokes at the alpha’s chest, looking down at the spot his finger is touching.
“Is there anything else we should talk about?” he asks.
“I don’t know. I could tell you about the two people I’ve dated back in high
school. Do you want to hear about that?”
Baekhyun arches his eyebrows, basic math quickly doing itself in his head.
“Back in high school? Like… Five years ago? So… You spent five years single?”
“Why do I sense you’re judging me, Mr. I-Have-A-Plan?” Yifan grabs the hand
resting on his chest, rubbing his thumbs over Baekhyun’s knuckles. He pulls
Baekhyun back to the couch, kicking a stray sock out of the way.
Warmness floods Baekhyun’s insides and he sighs, sitting down and relaxing at
the nice feel of Yifan’s thumbs massaging his hand. “I dated someone two years
ago,” he announces proudly.
The other snorts. “Forgive me if I spent four years trying not to disgrace my
family. My mom never let me live down the fact that I needed to retake the
CSAT. I had to be a good student and there was no time for frolicking around.”
“So you had a plan of your own! That’s cool.”
“Well, yeah. My plan was to not suck and keep the good grades.” His thumbs
slide to Baekhyun’s wrist. “Besides, there was no one interesting in college,
so I didn’t miss out on anything.”
“Do you have a good relationship with your parents?” Yifan mentioning his mom
kind of makes Baekhyun curious to know more about his parents.
“Yeah, now it’s fine.” The alpha shrugs. “In high school they hated that I
seemed to care more about basketball than studying. The year I retook the CSAT
was awful, we would fight everyday. Even after I got into college, the
criticism would not cease. They wanted me to go into business, or law. The job
at the omega care center is my first stable job, I was finishing up college
when they hired me. It’s been a year and half, I think? I rented this place
immediately.”
He sighs. “They can see I’m doing well, that was their concern all along. For
me to have a good job and live a good life. I don’t think I’ll treat my
children the way they treated me, though. There must be better ways to raise
your kids.”
“I’m pretty sure someone wrote a book about it.” Baekhyun frowns, feeling a bit
too relaxed by Yifan’s ministrations.
“You’re not falling asleep are you?”
Baekhyun chuckles. “I’m sorry. Please keep talking, I’m listening. Tell me
about your two dates.”
Yifan talks about someone named Jamie and a boy called Jiho. Apparently, Yifan
dated Jamie in freshman year and Jiho in senior year. Neither lasted long, but
apparently Jiho was his sexual awakening. Baekhyun splutters.
“Do you mean he took your virginity? I thought everyone had sexual awakenings
in puberty.”
“Well, yeah, but Jiho was my first. Not like I’ve had a second, you know how my
college life was, but we had a lot of sex in senior year. Jiho was fairly…
Experimental.”
Strangely, Baekhyun does not feel embarrassed to hear about Yifan’s sexual
experiences. It’s like they’re talking about something trivial, like breakfast.
Maybe Jongdae’s retellings of his encounters have prepared him. He listens
attentively, casually dropping a question (‘If Jiho was a beta, how did you
knot him?’), humming in delight when Yifan grabs his other hand and starts
rubbing it.
They talk for hours. When Baekhyun finally checks the digital clock near
Yifan’s television set, it reads 11:27 PM. He’s starting to get sleepy.
Yifan gets up to reheat them some rice and kimchi (because it’s faster and
Baekhyun should eat healthy stuff). When he comes back, handing baekhyun a
small bowl, the omega assesses him.
He deems now a good time, and asks, “Are you going to be my boyfriend?”
Yifan’s face colors faintly, and he blinks, licking his lips. “If you feel that
it’s safe. And that it won’t threaten your future. It’s your decision,
Baekhyun. I’ll do whatever you want.”
So. Besides stupid, Yifan is also dense.
Baekhyun scoots closer to him, placing the bowl somewhere on the couch. Their
knees touch before Baekhyun leans forward, his hand closing around the collar
of Yifan’s shirt as he presses a tentative kiss on his mouth.
“Yes. You are going to be my boyfriend.”
                                      {x}
Morning comes and Baekhyun doesn’t think he’s ever slept so well. Before going
to bed the previous night, Yifan urged him to drink a little more of the tea.
He had already arranged the couch for himself and changed the sheets on his bed
so Baekhyun could make himself comfortable there. He appreciated Yifan’s
consideration and all, but Baekhyun had no intentions of sleeping there alone.
It took him a bit of whining and threatening to put his baby pictures online
(the naked ones Yifan made the terrible mistake of showing him), but in the
end, he manages to bring Yifan to bed with him. Hugging a red beanie that
smells like Yifan doesn’t even compare to snuggling close to him.
Yifan gets up a bit earlier to stop by the center and request leave time. ‘I
need leave so I can stay with you during your heat.’ Baekhyun had signed a
form, but according to Yifan, one of his colleagues needs to be absent all the
time to tend to his mate, and there are no painful bureaucracies. He just needs
to hand in the form. So he goes, and Baekhyun is left alone in his apartment.
There is a bag of chips in the counter with a note that says ‘We ate the
remaining real food I had last night. I’m going shopping on my way home.’
Baekhyun eats the chips (onion flavoured), and changes out of his pajamas. He
wears clothes of his own, but there’s a fluffy, really warm looking grey hoodie
laying on a chair in the bedroom, and it smells like Yifan.
Halfway through the morning Baekhyun feels a little cold, his limbs a bit achy.
He sits on the couch, legs up to his chest, and takes out his phone, opening
his group chat with Jongdae and Kyungsoo.
Baekhyun: My arms hurt.
Baekhyun: I saw all your messages, but I was cuddling last night and could not
answer.
Jongdae: so he took you in????
Baekhyun: Of course he took me in, I’m too adorable to be refused.
Kyungsoo: Did you drink the tea this morning?
Baekhyun: Nope, I’m sick of that tea. And my stomach is hurting now too. I’m
cold.
Kyungsoo: It’s supposed to make you feel better.
Baekhyun: But I don’t have nausea.
Jongdae: dont u think its taking too long for him t peak, ksoo?
Kyungsoo: Can’t really say. He’s a late bloomer, though.
Jongdae: aaaah yes that might be it
Jongdae: so, baek, are u dating the street alpha now?
The sounds of the door being unlocked pull Baekhyun away from the group chat,
and he peeks up like an eager puppy. He watches as Yifan makes his way inside
carrying heavy-looking bags. He’s wearing the red beanie. Baekhyun smiles.
“Do you want help with those?” He asks, not really intending to get up from his
comfortable spot on the couch.
Yifan glances at him. “Don’t worry about it.” He squints at Baekhyun. “Are you
wearing my hoodie?”
“Oh yeah,” he says, running a hand over the soft fabric. “It smells like you.”
Yifan blinks at him, but the corners of his lips tug upwards for a millisecond
before he continues placing the groceries on the counter. “Looks good on you.”
Baekhyun hums, leaning his cheek on his knees. “You should come over here. I’m
cold and my stomach hurts.”
The other stops what he’s doing, a bag of bean sprouts in hands. He stares at
Baekhyun in alarm. “Your stomach? Did you drink the tea?”
Rolling his eyes, Baekhyun lies down, making sure to leave an empty space near
him. “You sound like Kyungsoo. I don’t want that tea anymore. Are you going to
come cuddle me or not?”
It takes two seconds for Yifan to come to the couch, carefully placing himself
next to Baekhyun. His pure, unadulterated scent hugs Baekhyun entirely, and the
omega sighs joyfully. Pressing his nose on Yifan’s neck, Baekhyun takes him in,
his eyes fluttering shut. Yifan’s arms wrap around him protectively, the
alpha’s cheek on the top of Baekhyun’s head. If he’s still being bothered by
any sort of ache, Yifan’s presence smoothes it out and Baekhyun can barely feel
anything.
“This is better than the tea,” Baekhyun says.
“I still think you should keep drinking it.”
Instead of answering, Baekhyun noses his way up to Yifan’s jaw, peppering it
with kisses. Yifan grunts, slightly shifting. Baekhyun adjusts on top of him,
shivering when both of Yifan’s hands rest on his bare lower back. Somehow,
their moving messed up the hoodie, pulling it up a bit.
Their eyes meet, and Baekhyun can see his own desire mirrored. His breath
hitches, and he leans down, capturing Yifan’s lips with his own. Yifan brings
one hand up to Baekhyun’s hair, his other arm circling the omega’s waist. This
kiss seems more like the ones they shared before. A tad more free, less
tentative, more assertive. Yifan sucks on Baekhyun’s lower lip, nipping at it
before soothing it with his tongue. Baekhyun’s crotch is flush against Yifan’s
stomach, his hold so tight Baekhyun can barely move. He can feel blood rushing
there at every stroke of Yifan’s tongue against his, and he can’t help but
whimper and press closer against him, kissing him a little more insistently.
Eventually, Yifan breaks the kiss by turning his face. Baekhyun mouths at his
cheek, dissatisfied. He tries to bring him back into the kiss, but the alpha
gently pushes him away.
“We should,” Yifan wheezes, “slow down.”
What? It makes no sense to Baekhyun, why would they slow down now? “No, we
should not.” Once more he searches Yifan’s mouth only to be denied.
“Seriously, you said you were… Feeling sick.”
“I’m all good now.” Baekhyun goes for it again, and again, Yifan dodges him.
This time he sits up, Baekhyun plopping on his thighs. His hand is still around
Baekhyun’s waist, but the proximity they had seconds before is totally lost as
the alpha makes sure that Baekhyun is not sitting on his crotch.
Yifan fixes the hem of the hoodie so Baekhyun is completely covered. Baekhyun
pouts. “Why you don’t wanna kiss me?”
He’s not expecting the snort, or the gentle smile, or soft kiss Yifan plants on
his lips. Baekhyun feels flooded by affection, and links his hands around the
other’s neck just to touch. Yifan runs a hand through Baekhyun’s hair, and his
eyelashes flutter. “Of course I wanna kiss you, you have the loveliest lips,”
he says, and Baekhyun smiles. “It’s just… You were rubbing on me.”
“Rubbing?”
“Yes. There was friction.” Yifan’s cheeks color with a light shade of pink and
he averts his eyes for a moment. “I feel like we should wait… To… Rub.”
Baekhyun stares at him. He frowns. “Yifan… Are you embarrassed because my
covered dick touched you?”
The alpha gasps, “What, Baekhyun! I’m not--”
“You remember you took a leave from work so you could stay with me, right?
During my heat. And we’ll definitely fuck.”
Yifan is red as a pepper. “I can’t believe you,” he splutters. “When did you
start speaking like that…”
Baekhyun shrugs. Well, he’s feeling a lot more brazen, is true. Maybe when he
accepted that he needed Yifan to be with him, he also accepted that muffled
Jongdae-ish side of him. It’s good, he thinks. He feels unrestrained, more in
control of himself than he’s ever been.
“I’m not embarrassed, I just don’t think we should… Act on impulses and
instincts,” Yifan explains. His eyes drop to Baekhyun’s neck, and a warm thumb
presses smoothly over the bite. “The last time we did that did not go well.”
Ok, Baekhyun gets it. Just because he trusts Yifan, it doesn’t mean that Yifan
trusts himself. Alright then, he’ll behave.
“Besides,” the other continues. “You’ve been having the symptoms for how long?
Three days?”
“Four.”
“It doesn’t take longer than five for the heat to hit.” Yifan caresses his
nape, nose coming to brush on Baekhyun’s cheek. It’s incredibly doting, and it
fills him with more of that wonderful, warm feeling. “Till then, we can just
kiss and cuddle, can’t we?”
“No rubbing?” Baekhyun checks. Yifan chuckles.
“No rubbing.”
Yifan cooks for them, a simple fried rice that tastes amazing. Then, they talk
a bit more, watch TV for a while, kiss a bit more (without humping or rubbing
or any friction). When they go to bed, Yifan’s chest pillowing Baekhyun’s head,
he feels so happy and complete that he wonders if this could be the happy
ending he’s been working so hard to achieve.
                                      {x}
It’s morning when Baekhyun wakes up the next day. He’s alone in bed, the covers
pushed to the end of the mattress. He might have kicked them off in the middle
of the night. It’s so hot. Baekhyun can feel beads of sweat rolling down his
face. It’s so freaking hot. He wipes the sweat off his forehead with his wrist,
and lifting his arm makes him notice that there’s sweat all over his body.
Something is off. Baekhyun doesn’t feel so great.
He whimpers in discomfort, shifting on the mattress. The shirt he’s wearing is
wet, and his dick is so hard it’s almost painful. There’s… Something… Something
slick between his legs. Baekhyun’s breath comes out mismatched, and he’s
suddenly feeling a out of air.
The shirt bothers him, the wetness of it irritates his skin, so Baekhyun tugs
it off. The fabric brushes over his nipples as he pulls it off. The contact
sends a rush of pleasure throughout his body, and Baekhyun moans. He cups his
hard cock through his boxers, fondling with it as if it would make it stop
pulsating with need. It won’t. Baekhyun bites on his lower lip as he feels more
of that slick trailing down, coating the insides of his ass cheeks. He’s
awfully horny. Without putting much thought into it, Baekhyun lowers his
underwear and pumps his hardness. Baekhyun doesn’t think he’s ever felt this
much need. All the times he’s jacked off, even the times he’s tried to finger
himself, it never felt like this. There’s so much pressure lodged inside him,
he pushes his hips off the bed and into his fist as if his life depends on it.
He comes with a gasp, holding his breath as ejaculate drips down his cock,
smearing all over his hand.
His hands shake, and Baekhyun feels worse than before. He rolls onto his
stomach, pushing his crotch on the mattress as he buries his face on a pillow.
Not his own, though. Yifan’s.
He feels the alpha’s scent on him as if it’s running through his veins. It
burns, but somehow he feels good. Baekhyun groans, rocking against the bed as
tears form in his eyes. He comes for the second time, Yifan’s name spilling
from his mouth.
Even feeling worn out and emptied, Baekhyun’s cock is still hard. It twitches
every time he gets a whiff of Yifan’s scent. Yifan. His alpha. He needs him so
much, why isn’t he here? Shifting once more, the sheets underneath him a sweaty
mess, Baekhyun lifts on his elbows, trying to find Yifan somewhere, anywhere.
There’s wetness in his eyes, maybe sweat, maybe tears, but his sight is blurry,
and Baekhyun can’t see much. He flops down on the mattress, his hard cock
resting slick and dripping precome against his stomach. Pathetically, he calls
for Yifan.
He doesn’t know how much time passes until he hears the door, and then there
are hurried steps approaching the room. Yifan barges in. Baekhyun can’t see his
face very clearly from afar, but he’s wearing the red beanie, and the scent
that attacks him is most definitely his alpha’s.
“Yifan,” he whines, head falling back on the pillow. The mattress dips, and
suddenly, there’s warmness next to him. He blinks, urging his eyes to focus on
the man peering down at him.
“It’s alright,” Yifan answers, his voice shaky, loaded with something Baekhyun
can’t identify. Worry, anxiety, lust, he can’t say. He just reaches out, and
Yifan holds his hand. When Baekhyun finally manages to look at him, he sees a
panicking man. “It’s ok, this is… Um… Baek…”
No. No, he can’t pull away now. Not now when Baekhyun needs him so much, no.
“Yifan,” Baekhyun pleads. “Please, don’t… Don’t leave me.”
Yifan shakes his head, a hand cupping Baekhyun’s sweaty face. His eyes soften a
bit. “I won’t, I won’t, don’t worry.”
His touch makes Baekhyun’s cock twitch again, and the concentrated dose of
Yifan’s scent he’s getting is enough to send a new rush of pleasure down his
body. “Touch me,” Baekhyun begs, because nothing he’s ever felt can be compared
to the feeling of Yifan’s hands on him.
It takes him a couple seconds, minutes, perhaps, but Yifan touches him. He does
it delicately, as if a mishandling could break Baekhyun in half. A hand runs
down Baekhyun’s chest, encasing his hip, thumbing over his waistband. It’s
nearly enough to drive him mad. Yifan’s hands feel huge as they caress
Baekhyun’s thighs, gently pulling down the underwear that’s been resting above
his knees.
“What do you want me to do, Baek?” he asks.
What Baekhyun doesn’t want him to do? He wants to feel Yifan’s bare chest
against him, he wants the alpha’s hands on his cock, he wants his fingers
inside him. Baekhyun wants everything he has to offer, and he can’t wait
anymore.
“I want you to make me come,” Baekhyun wheezes. “Please, make me come.”
Yifan complies. First, with his hand around Baekhyun’s cock, pumping
painstakingly slowly, occasionally rubbing his thumb over the tip, spreading
precome all over the length. Baekhyun thrusts up, fucks into his hand until
Yifan drags him closer, places Baekhyun’s lower half onto his lap, his legs on
either side of the alpha. The position restricts Baekhyun’s movements, and it’s
a lot more agonizing to lie still. He whimpers, biting on his knuckles, not
being able to stop himself from rolling his hips, chasing the highest level of
friction he can achieve. Baekhyun releases like that, white behind his eyes,
stomach clenching, throat blocked, Yifan’s hand fondling his erection.
Yifan makes him come with his fingers deep inside Baekhyun next. Two at first,
scissoring, spreading inside him, stretching him. Baekhyun loosens up quite
easily, probably it’s that slick’s doing. Yifan’s fingers slide in and out of
him, a hand soft on Baekhyun’s lower back, supporting him. In the rare moments
he manages to get a hold of himself to actually look at Yifan, his eyes meet
with want. Flowing into him in the same proportion he gives it. Yifan wants him
as much as he wants the alpha, and Baekhyun can feel it. He can feel that
connection people talk about, the exchange between a pair, the need he has for
Yifan, the need Yifan has for him. It’s all right there in their eyes, in the
way they gaze at each other amid all the whirlwind of sensations running
through and out of them.
Baekhyun understands it now. Why he felt pulled towards Yifan, why he couldn’t
ignore it. This is the moment where it all becomes perfectly clear, the stomach
twists, the hitched breaths, the heightened heartbeats. It’s not a simple
attraction. It’s mating.
Using all the strength he can muster, Baekhyun grabs at Yifan’s arms. It halts
his ministrations, and for a second he thinks Yifan is panicking again. Then,
Baekhyun pulls him down for a kiss. He’s not sure if it’s possible, but he
tries to convey everything into that kiss. Yifan’s fingers slip out of him, and
he surrenders to Baekhyun’s lips.
“Yifan,” Baekhyun pants, mouth brushing over Yifan’s, hands tightening on his
arms. “I-I need you… I need you inside me.”
Yifan nods, taking one last kiss before pushing off of Baekhyun, quickly
removing his clothes. It’s the first time Baekhyun’s seen him shirtless, he’s
all tight muscles and hard lines, not too buffed but built perfectly. He
reaches out, the tips of his fingers barely grazing his stomach.
In less than a minute Yifan hovers over him completely naked, his hard, leaking
cock looking so scrumptious that Baekhyun’s mouth actually waters. It might be
his condition, though. He can’t tell. The only thing he can do is whimper a
broken ‘Alpha’ at the man on top of him. Yifan leans down, kisses him tenderly,
brushes Baekhyun’s sweaty bangs away from his forehead.
“You want this?” He asks.
“Yes, I want it, I need it. I need you, please, Yifan, just--”
“Ok,” Yifan says, and he pecks at Baekhyun’s lips once again. “Look at me.”
Baekhyun does. Yifan is looking at him intently, eyes roaming across his face.
Suddenly there’s a poke at his entrance, prodding tentatively. Baekhyun
whimpers, and Yifan caresses his face.
“It’s alright, keep looking at me.” Baekhyun is trying, he really is, but the
tip of Yifan’s cock is now breaching his hole and it’s very distracting. It
pushes a bit further, and Baekhyun feels his rim stretch. It stings, but it
soothes more than it hurts. Yifan keeps on pushing bit by bit, his mouth
pressing kisses all over Baekhyun’s face, probably trying to divert him from
any pain he might be feeling. It works to rile Baekhyun even more, and he ends
up thrusting back into Yifan, and the alpha’s dick slides right in.
It feels impossibly tight, the tip of Yifan’s cock pressing against Baekhyun’s
prostate. He cries, rocking desperately, but Yifan pins him to the mattress and
starts thrusting.
With every snap of his hips, Yifan’s length prods at Baekhyun’s prostate.
Surging forward, Yifan captures a nipple with his tongue. Baekhyun gasps, the
fire he came to associate with Yifan blowing inside him. The alpha kisses him,
tells him how great he’s doing, how good he feels, Baekhyun hears everything as
if coming from a distance place. Yifan’s knot grows inside him, pushing
further, tying them together, and all the omega can do is whimper. The bite on
his neck pulses, and Baekhyun comes. Warmness floods all the tightly empty
spaces inside him, and the last thing Baekhyun acknowledges is Yifan’s voice
telling him something really important. Then he blacks out.
 
There are three more heat waves in the span of four days. Everything is a big
blur, Baekhyun doesn’t even remember stepping out of bed to pee. He remembers
Yifan though. He remembers Yifan naked, rocking his hips into Baekhyun. He
remembers Yifan sweating, cursing, coaxing moans out of Baekhyun, whispering
gently to him after they’re both sated and tired. He remembers Yifan’s scent.
On the fifth day, Baekhyun wakes up to annoying backaches and a stench that he
soon realizes is coming from himself. He ventures out of bed, covering himself
with a blanket. There are sounds coming from the living room -- or is it the
kitchen? Baekhyun pokes his head out of the bedroom. He’s not sure if he should
go any further, he smells really bad. But he’s also curious to know where Yifan
is, and what he’s doing. So Baekhyun finally exits the room, carefully walking
through the short corridor that leads to the common areas. He manages to catch
a glimpse of Yifan in the kitchen. He’s completely oblivious to Baekhyun. Just
watching him chop some meat, an activity that should not be considered sexy,
fills Baekhyun with affection. A heavy sigh escapes his mouth, and Baekhyun
leans against the wall for a while. Yifan grabs a frying pan and turns on the
stove. It’s pretty evident that he’s cooking, and the prospect of food makes
Baekhyun’s stomach rumble. He should wash himself first.
After a warm, soothing shower that cleanses him to the depths of his soul,
Baekhyun searches through Yifan’s closet for comfortable clothes. He wears his
own boxers just to say he’s not totally neglecting his own clothing. It’s just
Yifan’s are so much better. They’re more comfortable, and they smell like him.
When he deems himself presentable, Baekhyun goes into the kitchen. This time,
Yifan notices him. The alpha turns around to face him, eyebrows shooting up in
surprise.
“Hey!” he greets, placing the knife he’s been holding down on the counter. “How
are you feeling?”
“Clean,” Baekhyun says, wrapping both arms around the alpha’s waist. Yifan hugs
him back, a hand caressing Baekhyun’s wet hair strands. It’s so relaxing to be
this close to him, enveloped by his scent and warmness, being able to touch
him. Baekhyun leans a cheek on Yifan’s shoulder, feeling the other’s arms
tighten just a little around him. Comforting.
“I think the heat is over.” Yifan leans back to eye him. “Do you feel fine?”
“Totally fine.” He pulls Yifan back. “I’m hungry, though. What are you
cooking?”
“Well, I was cooking meat, to replenish your energies, but I can’t keep working
when there’s a human octopus attached to me.” His tone isn’t chiding, fond
instead, and Baekhyun chuckles.
“You can go about your business,” Baekhyun says, clinging closer.
“I can’t move!”
They banter for a while about Baekhyun’s insistence of remaining attached to
Yifan while he cooks, but eventually, the omega releases him and takes a seat
on the island counter, claiming that he’ll stay to “inspect” Yifan’s cooking.
He’s not a very good cook, considering he’s had very little opportunities to
engage in elaborate recipes (Baekhyun only got his small stove this year), so
he’s glad to stay put watching his alpha work, occasionally calling his
attention just because Baekhyun likes when Yifan’s eyes are on him. He pulls
the alpha in for sporadic kisses and Yifan nearly burns the meat because
they’re kissing more than he’s cooking, and Baekhyun seriously wouldn’t mind
eating burnt meat if that meant a few minutes longer with his lips on Yifan’s.
The food is good, but snuggling in the couch after is a lot better.
 
Yifan cleans his bedroom the next day. Baekhyun helps by collecting the dirty
clothes and sheet and dumping them in the laundry basket. Yifan does all the
heavy work, though, not seeming to want Baekhyun to strain.
“How do we know that it worked?” Baekhyun asks him later when they’re eating.
Take out, since Yifan was feeling a little bit lazy and Baekhyun did not
volunteer to cook himself, afraid to damage any utensils.
“What?” Yifan asks, cheeks bloating with food.
“The…” How should he call it. “Procedure. During the heat? How do we know it
worked?”
Baekhyun’s been thinking about it. The deed was done, and the first heat
passed. How can he be sure that he’ll able to have children? What if he’s not?
What if they didn’t do it right and now Baekhyun is infertile?
Yifan blinks at him. “We had sex. It worked.”
Baekhyun rolls his eyes. “Yes, I know that worked. But I don’t feel any
different. I just… Want to know if… Everything is ok?”
Placing his chopsticks down, Yifan takes a sip of the water glass standing near
his food bowls on the counter. He turns on his stool so he’s facing Baekhyun.
“It’s usually pretty effective, Baek. If something goes wrong during an omega’s
first heat and this person happens to become infertile, it’s usually because
there was some sort of… Hormonal anomaly or something. At least we can tell
that pretty quickly with that first blood test omegas take when they go to the
omega care center. Your test was pretty alright, there was nothing wrong with
your hormone levels.”
Yifan can probably tell that Baekhyun is not very convinced. He adds, “You can
take another test if you want. Just to be sure?”
Well… That would be good. Although Baekhyun remembers that Jongdae also said he
didn’t feel much different after his first heat. Baekhyun should have known he
wouldn’t be able to tell. It’s just… This is really important to him.
“Can I take another test?” He asks Yifan.
The alpha gently touches his neck. “Sure you can. We’ll drop by the clinic
tomorrow. Are you feeling alright to go out?”
Snorting, Baekhyun lightly pushes at his shoulder. That reminds him of
something.
He’s feeling pretty comfortable here, in Yifan’s home, wearing Yifan’s clothes
while Yifan cooks him food only so they can fall into bed together at night and
cuddle until sleep takes them both. Baekhyun is feeling pretty good. But he
needs to go back to his dorm room. Jongdae and Kyungsoo have already filled
their chat room with questions on his condition and if Baekhyun got “the
dicking of his life” (KIM, Jongdae. 2016).
“I should go back to my dorm room,” Baekhyun concludes.
Yifan doesn’t answer immediately. He pokes at his food before nodding.
“Alright. Tell me when you want to go and I’ll drive you.”
They finish eating in comfortable silence. Baekhyun wonders if he’d get away
with sneaking a couple of Yifan’s shirts with him back to his dorm.
                                      {x}
The test results show what Yifan had already anticipated. Baekhyun is fine, his
hormones are fine. Which means that there is no threat to his future plans.
After being attacked by Jongdae and Kyungsoo on his first day back in the dorms
(his friends popped into his room a mere fifteen minutes after Baekhyun
informed them he was back), Baekhyun decided that his friends should be
properly introduced to Yifan, considering they’re boyfriends now. They end up
at a nice pizza place Jongdae recommends.
Things have been going well so far, Baekhyun thinks. Chanyeol’s light chatter
makes Yifan comfortable. Baekhyun figured his very protective friends would try
to intimidate him. He’s glad Jongdae makes no crude jokes, seemingly focused on
dropping a million questions about retaking the CSAT on Yifan’s lap.
“You still don’t know if you’ll need to retake the test,” Kyungsoo says.
“Well, it’s possible.” Jongdae shrugs. “I’m not worried about retaking if it
means better chances to make it to college.”
“You need to study,” Baekhyun remembers. “Not just fool around the whole year
and expect to score high.”
“I don’t think it’s healthy to just focus on studying, though,” Yifan offers,
holding a slice of pizza up. “Don’t stress too much. Study hard, but take your
breaks.”
Jongdae smiles sweetly at him. “You’re not so bad for a street alpha.”
“Street alpha?” Yifan frowns.
There. He knew it would happen. They were just taking their time, waiting for
Yifan’s defenses to lower so they could catch him in a moment of weakness.
Nodding, Kyungsoo says, “We called you street alpha for a long time.”
“They really did, hyung.” Chanyeol, who’s been immersed in eating all the pizza
he can take, offers his input.
“I think we still call you street alpha,” Kyungsoo ponders. “Because, you know,
the way you and Baek met.”
Carefully, Yifan gazes between them. “The way we met?”
Jongdae shrugs. “We’ve heard you’ve been quite the asshole when you met.”
Yifan’s eyes go wide when Sehun points out, “Street alphas are usually assholes
who bug omegas on the streets.” Baekhyun is a bit happy to see him today, which
is surprising. During the period he was at Yifan’s place, Jongdae had decided
that he didn’t want to date Sehun exclusively, and told the young alpha they
should take a break. According to Chanyeol and Kyungsoo, Sehun cried for three
days straight before Jongdae took him back. He thinks Sehun might be the nicest
boyfriend Jongdae’s ever had. He doesn’t look constantly horny, and he
sincerely seems to care about Jongdae. He’s a big noodle and a bit dumb, that’s
true, but which alpha isn’t? Baekhyun likes Sehun. Especially now that his
comment prompts Yifan into a thousand apologies per minute.
“I feel terrible about that day it wasn’t my intention to be an asshole I
thought I was being helpful ugh I’m so stupid--”
Laughing, Chanyeol pats Yifan’s back sympathetically.
“To be honest I was a little surprised when Baekhyun told me you worked at the
omega care center,” Kyungsoo says. “How can you work around omegas and still be
so tactless when it comes to them?”
Yifan winces, covering his face. Baekhyun can tell he’s blushing by the red
tips of his ears. “I don’t know…” He whimpers.
Kyungsoo snorts, folding his arms on his chest. “It’s ok, I assume Baekhyun
will groom you just right.” He turns to face Baekhyun. “Won’t you, Baek?”
“He’s already showing signs of improvement,” Baekhyun places a reassuring hand
on Yifan’s nape, caressing. “Since the marking incident, I mean.”
Baekhyun’s been feeling a lot more at ease to discuss the bite, now that it’s
past them. The purple mark has transitioned into a warm shade of red. Every now
and again he will look at its reflection in the mirror and feel a weird mix of
feelings; passion, concern, comfort. He remembers feeling scared when it
happened, but no longer. He doesn’t feel fear anymore. The mark represents
being thrown out of his own shell, and swimming into scary open waters. It
represents the moment Baekhyun decided he should not be scared of living,
should not stop himself from living.
“I’m also very sorry about that.” Yifan’s voice comes whiny and muffled by the
hands still covering his face.
“You’re sorry about a lot of things,” Sehun says.
“Which means that you messed up a lot.” Kyungsoo sighs. “We’ll not hold your
past mistakes against you. You’re human, you’re not perfect. But you can
learn.” He leans his arms on the table, eyes as hard as Baekhyun’s ever seen
them. The silence makes Yifan lower his hands to take a tentative look around,
and what he finds is a fierce beta glaring at him with fire in his eyes. “If
you hurt Baekhyun again… I will kill you.”
No one speaks for what it feels like an hour.
The third pizza of the night arrives just in time to disperse the heavy
atmosphere. While everyone moves to grab another slice, Yifan discreetly leans
into Baekhyun’s side.
“Your friend… He’s scary,” he says.
Baekhyun hums. “You better take him seriously. Kyungsoo hardly ever jokes.”
He senses Yifan shuddering next to him.
“Initial warnings issued, I’d like you to feel comfortable around us, Yifan.”
Kyungsoo smiles tightly. “Think of us as friends.” Then, he accepts a slice of
pizza offered by Chanyeol.
When Kyungsoo is distracted with pizza, Yifan leans into Baekhyun again,
whispering, “He reminds me of someone, but I can’t remember who…”
Later that night after Baekhyun’s taken a hot shower and is tucking himself
beneath his covers, Yifan texts him.
From: Yifan
Vito Corleone. Kyungsoo reminds me of Vito Corleone.
 
A few days later when he meets his friends for lunch, Kyungsoo shares something
very interesting.
“He came to talk to me, did he tell you?”
Baekhyun’s eyes lift from his phone and the pictures of the new washing machine
at the dorm’s laundry room that Yixing just sent him. “Who?”
“Yifan,” the beta says, a smile blossoming on his face. “He called Chanyeol and
asked him if we could meet him. I was curious, so I went.”
“What did he want?” Jongdae asks.
“Apparently, he took my warnings seriously that day at the pizza place.”
Kyungsoo chuckles as if the whole situation is nothing but funny.
“Good, he should take it seriously,” Jongdae says, and takes a giant bite at
his burger. There’s lettuce hanging from his mouth. Baekhyun looks away.
“He didn’t tell me he went to see you.” There was one afternoon that Yifan
simply disappeared, though. Maybe that was when it happened. Baekhyun wonders
why he wouldn’t say anything…
“We met. He was very apologetic about everything we mentioned. Told us he never
meant you any harm, and that he’ll never hurt you again. Sounded pretty
sincere.” Kyungsoo drinks his soda. “He really likes you, Baek, I don’t doubt
that. I just wanted him to know that there’s someone here looking out for you,
and that he should treat you right.”
Baekhyun feels flooded by this good feeling that starts in his heart and
spreads through his whole body. He smiles at his friend, pulling him into a
quick hug. “I love you, Soo.”
“I love you too,” Kyungsoo answers, sounding a little bashful.
Sensing a retort coming from the other, Baekhyun drags Jongdae into the hug as
well. “I love you, Dae.”
Jongdae melts instantly, and Baekhyun pecks him on the cheek, feeling
pleasantly whole. They might be a bit weird, sometimes intimidating, but
they’re the most important people in Baekhyun’s life. They’re his family. He
wouldn’t trade them for anything in this world.
                                    {x X x}
The remaining days of winter break go by in a rush. Going back to school after
such an intense break feels weird to Baekhyun. It’s good they only have a few
weeks left before the school year is officially over. To Baekhyun and the rest
of his senior class, it’s the ending of an important phase of their lives, and
the beginning of a new and exciting one.
Most of his colleagues have received answers from colleges. Kyungsoo, as
expected, is going to Yonsei. Jongdae got waitlisted by a few colleges but is
still waiting for some more answers.
Knowing that the next few years of their lives are secure, some students go
through the last weeks of school recklessly, ditching classes and neglecting
assignments. Baekhyun… Is Baekhyun, though. He carries out his school
activities normally, dedicating time to homework and studying. Surprisingly,
Jongdae doesn’t miss a single class. Baekhyun guesses he feels bad about not
making into college and blames it on the thoughtless behavior he had the whole
year.
Because of school, Baekhyun ends up seeing a lot less of Yifan. Their schedules
never match, and when Yifan is free to visit Baekhyun in his dorm, the omega is
too tired to hang out. They see each other on weekends, go out for pizza, tea,
or just a walk. To Baekhyun, who got used to Yifan’s constant presence, it’s
not enough.
When school is finally over, Baekhyun receives a document. It’s a declaration,
signed and stamped by government officials, claiming that from that day
onwards, Baekhyun answers for his own actions. Emancipated. His stomach flops
and clenches as he reads the paper over and over. It takes a while for it to
stop clenching. After the initial shock of receiving the document fades,
Baekhyun gets excited. Finally, finally he’ll get to live his life. His own
life. No more counselling sessions, no more permission forms, no more nosy
faculty members.
He’s told he’ll be able to reside in the dorms until he moves into SNU campus,
which would be in exactly ten days.
Two days before Baekhyun moves, Yixing goes back to China. Baekhyun is not
ready to say goodbye to him. Not to someone who’s been so important to him,
who’s always treated him kindly and respected his feelings like no one else.
“Why are you crying?” Yixing asks when Baekhyun’s first tear drops. The alpha
smiles a dimpled smile, one of those smiles that never fail in warming
Baekhyun’s insides.
“Because you’re leaving,” he sobs. Jongdae, who had agreed to accompany him to
the airport, pats his back.
“Come on, Baekhyun, I told you I’ll skype you, didn’t I?” Yixing pulls him in
for a hug, and Baekhyun’s tears roll freely down his face. He hasn’t got many
friends in this life. Every single one is precious to him. Yixing is more than
precious. He’s almost essential. Baekhyun clings to him as if it would
magically make him stay. “It’s not like we won’t see each other again.”
“He’s coming to visit, aren’t you?” Jongdae asks, and Baekhyun suspects he’s
doing so to offer him some comfort.
“Of course,” Yixing assures him, ruffling Baekhyun’s hair before parting the
hug. “I’ll come visit.”
Baekhyun knows he might not. Who knows what path his life will take, who knows
what will happen to him once he arrives in his home country. There’s a chance
he’ll, indeed, never see Yixing again.
Still, Baekhyun pleads, “Promise?”
Beaming, Yixing presses a lingering kiss on his cheek. When he faces Baekhyun,
there’s honesty in his eyes. “I promise, Baekhyun.”
Once Baekhyun stops crying, Yixing finally decides to board. It’s odd, watching
his back as he walks through the boarding gate knowing that he won’t be coming
back. At least not any time soon. Yixing, who has more faith in Baekhyun than
Baekhyun himself. Yixing, who always went out of his way to make sure Baekhyun
was smiling, who allowed Baekhyun to put his clothes with his when the laundry
room was too packed. Baekhyun will miss him like crazy.
That night, Baekhyun, Jongdae and Kyungsoo go back to the dorm building so they
can pack Baekhyun’s stuff for moving in two days. He watches Yixing’s door for
a bit, thoughtful. Yixing would have been a safe choice, if Baekhyun had taken
him as his alpha. He wouldn’t have been the right choice, though. Baekhyun is
glad to have been able to remain his friend, a friend who gave him so many
good, amazing memories. He really hopes to see Yixing again one day.
                                      {x}
Baekhyun excelled in school because of his commitment and efforts, which made
him seem quite special at the time, but in Seoul National University he’s just
one in a thousand. Every single student in the College of Business and
Administration seems intent on being the next president. It doesn’t help that
each class has at least eighty students, people become desperate for attention.
In his Fundamentals of Economics class, there are at least ten students kissing
the professor’s ass in the first week alone. Baekhyun was a notorious ass
kisser in middle school, but that’s only because he was pretty desperate to be
noticed. As he watches his classmates struggle to say the right thing and
impress the professors, Baekhyun thinks he might do well only studying and
continuing to be an engaged student.
He doesn’t have a roommate, which is good for now. Baekhyun isn’t really
looking to make friends, although he ends up meeting a beta girl called
Sooyoung in Doing Business in Korea. Sooyoung is quite alright. Baekhyun likes
the judgement stare she throws the rabidly horny people making out in the
Management section of the library. He thinks they’ll be good friends.
Kyungsoo sounds excited about college in every single message he sends
Baekhyun, and Jongdae is spending some time studying with Sehun’s help (the
interesting part is that they’re really studying). They visit Baekhyun’s new
dorm room on a weekend they’re both free, and agree that the installations
(especially the private bathroom), are much better than Baekhyun’s old dorm at
the school.
Yifan doesn’t visit as much, since alphas who are not students are not allowed
to enter the omega dorm building -- even the student alphas have to go through
a heavy protocol to be granted access. As if it would stop people from having
sex. Baekhyun is already used to his neighbor’s sex schedule (the walls are
very thin). At 10 AM on Tuesdays, Ahri has sex with a girl called Jieun. At 8
PM on Fridays, it’s a boy called Mingyu. The Happiness Gnome even hears the
sounds coming from Ahri’s room during one of their Skype sessions. He’s just
amused, much to Baekhyun’s dismay. Sooyoung, however, is not surprised when he
tells her about it, claiming that her own roommate brings lays to their shared
room expecting her to go on a casual stroll while they fuck. A bit wilder than
what he was expecting from college dorms.
The useless protocol forces him to go to Yifan’s place, which is not exactly
burdensome. Yifan cooks and lets Baekhyun pick the movie they’re watching on
the nights they don’t go out.
“Rabidly horny, you say?” His boyfriend asks as he hands Baekhyun a bowl of
freshly cooked french fries before flopping next to him on the couch.
Baekhyun stuffs his mouth with french fries and nods. “You wouldn’t believe my
neighbor, the stuff I hear? Sometimes I get curious to know what the hell
they’re doing to her in there. It might be some acrobatic shit.”
Yifan laughs, bringing Baekhyun a bit closer to him. He picks a few fries, but
mostly, he’s just watching Baekhyun.
“I feel bad for Sooyoung. She was unfortunate enough to get a roommate, and now
her study schedule is being disturbed by her roommate’s sex habits.”
“You sound so judgemental,” Yifan says, amusement coating his tone. “Baek,
college kids will have wild, mindless sex. It’s rule number one in the college
kids rulebook.”
“Oh, I don’t mind if they want to jump each other’s bones.” Baekhyun turns on
the couch, placing his legs on Yifan’s lap while his side leans against the
backrest. The alpha rests his palms on Baekhyun’s calves. “I just wish they
would mind others who are more interested in actually educating themselves than
improving their sexual lives. There has to be a rule in that rulebook of yours
that protects the rights of students that want to do some actual studying!”
Yifan laughs louder, leaning forward to kiss Baekhyun’s shoulder. “You’re so
cute, all responsible trying to earn your golden stars.”
Baekhyun kicks him playfully, and Yifan’s laughter intensifies as he recoils.
Baekhyun, failing to bite back a smile, retorts, “I’m not trying to earn golden
stars, you moron, I just want to make the best of my time there. I want to
learn, not find sexual partners!”
“No one can stop you from learning, Baek.” Yifan adjusts Baekhyun’s legs on his
lap, rubbing his calves soothingly. “Not even if they tried.”
Sighing, Baekhyun figures he’s right. He is good at learning, and there’s
always a recluse spot where he can go over the content of his classes.
“Did you check that job you mentioned?” Yifan asks.
Oh, the position as assistant librarian. It doesn’t really pay much, but for
his first semester in college it seems like a good idea. Baekhyun is really in
the adaptation phase, what he wants the most is to explore and figure out every
corner and every little thing SNU has to offer. A job is really important to
him, but the assistant librarian position will only require that he works four
hours a day, whenever he wants. This is why he saved money in high school, so
he could settle down and take his time. He thinks the amount he has in the bank
plus the small pay he’ll get from the job will be enough for the semester.
Baekhyun can come up with a plan for next semester in the meantime.
Besides, Yifan’s been dropping hints.
“Oh yeah, I’ll work four hours a week,” Baekhyun says. “It’s perfect, since
I’ll be able to scold the fornicators at the Management section.”
“Fornicators?” And Yifan is laughing again. “God, you’re really pissed.”
“No one messes with my study patterns, Yifan. No one.”
The alpha gazes at him for a while. “You know… You can always move out of the
dorms if it’s bothering you.”
There. Hints.
He’s not very subtle, Baekhyun knows exactly what he’s proposing. Yifan will
never straight out ask Baekhyun to move in with him, but he’ll tiptoe around
the subject whenever he can. Like now.
Baekhyun has given some thought to moving in with Yifan. It would be good for
their relationship. They would see each other more often, Baekhyun would have
more chances to sneak his hands into Yifan’s shirts, and the food, of course.
However, all the money he wouldn’t spend on food, he would spend on
transportation. Not much, but still. He feels like he needs to be in the campus
now, immersed in that atmosphere, in the new. Even if he complains about the
horny students, the whole experience is pretty exciting, and Baekhyun worked so
hard to be there. He wants to be there.
Sighing, he moves so he’s sitting comfortably on Yifan’s lap, his legs on each
side of the alpha’s body. Yifan’s arms settle around him.
“I know I have options,” Baekhyun says. “I have Jongdae, Kyungsoo, I have you.
I know any of you would give me a place to stay if I needed. That’s more than I
ever had, and I treasure you very much.”
Yifan watches him quietly, a serene expression on his face.
“I want to be in campus for now.” Baekhyun smiles. “You said it yourself, the
horny students are part of the whole college experience.” When Yifan smiles,
Baekhyun kisses him softly, hands threading gently into his hair. They part,
and Baekhyun whispers against his mouth, “Be patient. I’ll move in with you.
Just… Not now.”
Yifan hums and claims his mouth once more, hot and lazy, his tongue sliding
over Baekhyun’s lower lip before he sucks it, nips at it. His mouth moves to
kiss Baekhyun’s jaw, snaking down to his neck. “I’m not very subtle, am I?”
Baekhyun snorts, giggles. “No, you’re not.” He wraps both arms around Yifan’s
neck, meeting the alpha’s eyes when he finally pulls his mouth away from
Baekhyun’s skin. “You never were.”
“Alright,” Yifan says. “Whenever you’re ready.”
They smile at each other, and Baekhyun is at ease. Even if he doesn’t follow
his plan all that strictly, things will happen in their own time. He’s learned
that he can’t control every single thing, he can’t predict what’s going to
happen next. Baekhyun wasn’t looking for a boyfriend, he was even avoiding it,
but among all the noise in the world, he found Yifan. It might not have been
perfect from the start, but they found each other, and they work together. They
match. Baekhyun made it here, he knows he’ll find some obstacles in the way,
but he’ll keep going.
“I’ll survive the dorms, don’t worry.” He kisses Yifan’s cheeks, and the
alpha’s hold around him tightens.
“You’ll be fine.”
Yes, he will. Plan or no plan, he’ll be fine. They’ll be fine.
End Notes
     Omg did you actually read all that? Thank you soooooooooo
     muuuuuuccchhhhh! I accept all criticism and stuff, but please be
     gentle with me :)
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