Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/1515509.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Major_Character_Death, Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Alice_Nine, Ayabie_(Band), SID_(band)
  Relationship:
      Tora/Aki, Kenzo/Aki, Aki/Kenzo
  Character:
      Tora_(Musician), Aki_(SID), Kenzo_(Ayabie), Mao_(SID)
  Additional Tags:
      Character_Death, Suicide, Blood, Underage_Sex, Explicit_Language, Drug
      Abuse, Underage_Drug_Use, Mental_Instability, Alternate_Universe,
      Vomiting, Tragedy, Alternate_Universe_-_Dark
  Stats:
      Published: 2014-04-24 Words: 2747
****** Too Young ******
by kyoselflove
Summary
     Everyone told him that he was to young to understand love. That he
     didn’t know what it was. But what he felt for his best friend was
     truly love, everyone was wrong. Instead of lecturing him on love,
     maybe they should have brought his attention to his unhealthy
     lifestyle.
Notes
     An old OTP came to me and I wrote this! <3
Everyone told him that he was to young to understand love.  That he didn’t know
what it was.  But what he felt for his best friend was truly love, everyone was
wrong.  Instead of lecturing him on love, maybe they should have brought his
attention to his unhealthy lifestyle.  At the mere age of fourteen, he sat on
the cold tiled floor of a bathroom; loud music and people chatting away could
be heard beyond the door. Everyone was having a good time at the party, except
for him.
 
The tears never stopped flowing, but his cries to become almost silent, a
shuddered gasp for breath.  He didn’t know how long he had been sitting there,
with his best friend in his arms.  Looking down, his friend, or rather lover,
Kenzo, head in his lap, he looked into his unseeing empty eyes, and another
uncontrollable sob left him, his grip on the boy in his arms tightening.   He
ignored the blood and vomit that lay next to them, along with the white powder
that was drawn into neat lines on top of the toilet, the only thing that
mattered was the boy in his arms.
 
“Kenzo, please.  Don’t leave me.”  The words that slipped passed his lips were
useless, as they went unheard.
 
Trembling, he lowered his face down to his lover’s, placing a chaste kiss on
the bloody lips below him, the taste of metallic and bile made him pull away,
now noticing that Kenzo was becoming colder, he pulled the lifeless body closer
to him.
 
A knock on the door brought him out of his catatonic state. “Hey, come on!  You
guys have been in there forever!”
 
Without letting go of his lover, he unlocked the door before him, waiting for
his friend to enter.
 
“What the fuck are—” His friend stopped as his eyes landed on Kenzo.  “Oh my
god, Aki, what the fuck happened?!”
 
His friend, Mao, ran to the deceased body in his arms, attempting to get a
response, but Aki knew it was no use.
 
“He’s dead.”  Aki kept repeating in a whisper, rocking back and forth, his grip
never loosening on his lover.
 
Mao looked down at the body, the blood, then he lost it, he puked on the floor
away from his friends, it looked like Kenzo had been dead for hours.
 
“Aki, you need to let go.”  Coming out as a whisper, not very convincing.
 
Aki just shook his head, arms still wrapped tightly around Kenzo’s icy
motionless body.  Ignoring his living friend, he brought a hand to pull
dampened hair away from his best friend’s face, and murmured, “I love you,
Kenzo.”
 
A scream of an unknown girl resonating through out the rooms,  “There’s a dead
body!” Mao and Aki turned their heads to see that the bathroom door was open,
and a horrified looking girl was standing shrieking.
 
With what strength he could gather, he stood up, Kenzo still in his arms, he
struggled at first, as his mind was far from sober, giving him the illusion he
had strength that wasn’t there.  Mao reluctantly helped them, with stares from
everyone, they walked out of the house, when they got to the yard, and Aki fell
to his knees, bringing Kenzo with him.
 
There he finally began to realize that Kenzo was never coming back.  His throat
was dry, and it hurt to swallow, still tears came, he felt Mao hug him from
behind, trying to give him comfort, but it didn’t help at all.
 
~-~
 
Days, weeks, or maybe months have passed since Kenzo died.  His parents were to
ashamed to look at him, in the end he spent most of his time locked away in his
bedroom contemplating on ending it all.
 
His bedroom door opening took him out of his deep thought.  Aki buried his head
into his pillows, trying his best to avoid the other man.
 
“Akihito.” The man’s voice was deep, laced with concern yet firm.
 
Slowly, he pulled himself away from his pillow sanctuary with a groan of
frustration. “What?”
 
“Your parents are worried, I’m here to help.”  The man before bowed politely,
and then kneeled down next to the bed.
 
“I know this is hard, but please let me help. Sorry, I didn’t introduce
myself.  I’m Tora.”  The man was smiling widely at him.
 
“You can’t help me.” His voice came out harshly, but really he was just
hurting, and the truth hurt.
 
Tora’s smile faltered for a moment but then soon came back, “I know you feel
that it is the end of the world, but you are so—“
 
“Don’t you dare say young.”  Aki hissed the last word, anger building up in
him.
 
“You’re right. You are very mature for your age.” Tora complimented.
 
“Oh please, save it.” He spat out, this meeting already getting under his skin.
 
Tora let out a sigh, “Even though I am here by law, I truly do care.”
Aki turned away from the man, twirling his fingers into his blankets, trying to
distract himself.
 
“I can not even imagine what you are going through.  I am sorry for what
happened.  But you have a full life ahead of you.” 
 
He snorted, this was ridiculous, “I am so sick and tired of everyone coddling
me, and I don’t need your pity or the damn lectures.  I just want to be left
alone!”  Aki was screaming at this point, he had enough, really he wanted his
life to end, but he couldn’t say that to the social worker before him.
 
“Akihito…” The man brought a hand to the younger one’s back, stroking it
softly.
 
Aki started to cry; he couldn’t hold back the tears that had been threatening
to fall for so long. He flinched at the sudden touch on his back, but soon
relaxed welcoming the comfort he so desperately needed.
 
“I’ll come back tomorrow, okay?  Try to get some rest.” Tora whispered,
standing up, he straightened out his suit.  In that moment, Aki realized how
handsome the man was; he felt somewhat lucky, that he wasn’t assigned an older
man, although Tora looked aged, maybe mid forties.
 
Quietly he managed to say, “Thank you.”  Tears still falling from his face as
he watched the other man leave.
 
He let out a sigh then buried himself underneath the covers, inhaling the scent
that was Kenzo, although it was fading.  His body shook momentarily, but he
stopped it, he was tired of crying.
 
Taking a deep breath, he shut his eyes, he could hear Kenzo’s laugh, the sound
making him smile, he opened his eyes to laugh back, but then he realized it was
all in his head. He clutched the blankets around himself tighter, and then
closed his eyes again; sleep taking him over, eventually.
 
 
~-~
 
It had been six months since Kenzo’s death, and life without him had fallen
into a boring routine. Every morning, he would wait for his social worker to
open is door, sit on his bed, and begin talking. He hardly saw his parents, and
he was glad.  Often they argued, almost every night, Aki wondered why he still
was here, when he was so content on ending his life, to be with the one he
loved.
 
The door opened revealing the handsome social worker, Aki let a small smile
grace his lips. He was the only one who came to see him, talked to him,
listened to him.  Mao, one of his good friends, hadn’t spoke to him since Kenzo
died, he supposed he wasn’t a good friend anymore.
 
“Hey, Tora.” He gave a small wave from his bed, where he always seemed to be.
 
“Hello Aki.” The older man had become used to his nickname, which he liked much
better.
 
Tora sat on the younger one’s bed letting out a sigh, stretching out his legs,
head falling back against the headboard resting on his own hands.  Today was
the first day that Tora and him were alone, his parents went off to wherever,
and he didn’t even acknowledge it anymore.
 
“So, am I deemed unfit for parents, needing a stable home life, with a loving
family?” Aki laughed in a mocking voice.
 
Tora looked at him and grinned, “Your parents are rather undeserving of you.”
 
The sentence left Aki feeling happy, letting him genuinely smile.  “That they
are.”
 
The older man laughed lightly, looking away, shifting his crossed legs.  Aki
moved next to him, lying down on his side, his hand finding the other man’s,
intertwining their fingers.  Then he subconsciously rested his head on the
social worker’s shoulder, sighing.
 
These past few months he had become comfortable with the older man’s presence,
a sense of comfort always there for him.  They just laid there for a while, in
moments like this Aki could almost feel alive again, the pain temporarily
fading away.  He knew eventually that Tora would have to leave forever, and he
didn’t want that.
 
Shifting closer his lips grazed the man’s neck, limbs interweaving, he let his
hot breath ghost over the skin, “Tora…”
 
He could feel the other tense up considerably, because their current position
was beyond inappropriate to people’s standards.  But he didn’t care; the only
thing he cared about now was Tora, the one man who prolonged his pathetic
existence. 
 
Finally, Tora looked at him with worried eyes, Aki raised his hand to stroke
the older man’s cheek, and then lowered himself, face to face, placing his
chapped lips against those moist ones.  For a moment, Tora was still, the
younger one pushed harder into the simple kiss, carefully maneuvering himself
on top of the older man.
 
Once on top, he was bucking his hips against the other, receiving a gasp as he
felt the hardened length press against his thigh.  In that moment, Tora
returned the kiss eagerly; the younger one opened his mouth slightly to let him
in.  Tongues battled against each other, hips grinding together, he felt the
other’s hand slip underneath his shirt, rubbing his lower back lovingly.  Their
kiss was broken as they needed to catch their breaths, Aki took the moment to
take off his shirt, throwing it aside, Tora looked at him with wide eyes,
looking into the orbs he could read the man so easily. The older man was
scared, excited, and showed a certain kind of love; Aki brought their lips back
together, nipping at the lower lip of the other.
 
Truth be told, Aki has been waiting for this day for a while, making him almost
feel guilty. Quickly, he unbuttoned the social worker’s pants not bothering to
take them off; instead he pulled out the hard cock giving it a firmly pressed
stroke, earning a moan from Tora.
 
Aki broke away from the man as he lowered himself down, now he was faced with
the one thing he desired, he fervently licked the tip of the pulsating dick. 
His fingers leisurely stroking the base, he placed his mouth over the tip,
sucking it soothingly.  Taking his time, loving the tortured moans coming from
the older man.
 
Eventually he took the whole cock into his mouth, letting it slide with ease to
the back of his throat. He bobbed his head in a rhythm that had Tora gripping
at his hair, pulling him closer, and shoving his dick farther into his throat. 
Aki did not gag he took it all, he could hear the older man’s breath becoming
quicker, in which he released the cock, letting it slide from his mouth.
 
A groan of protest escaped Tora’s mouth, Aki looked at him, his face flushed,
breathing irregular, eyes shut, and very much alive.  It was all he needed, as
he quickly discarded his sweatpants and placed himself on top of the still very
hard slick cock.
 
He pushed himself down hard, not caring as the intrusion was very uncomfortable
but yet exactly what he needed.  Tora was much bigger than Kenzo was, but it
still felt amazing, he let a moan pass his lips, realizing his eyes were shut
he opened them to see Tora’s shocked face, which only lasted a few more seconds
as he began to ride the man, all thoughts of Kenzo leaving his mind
immediately.
 
“Aki…” Tora half moaned and warned.
 
“Too late Tora, enjoy it.” He panted, his pace quickening as he rode the other
man.  Aki looked down, enjoying the view of the cock slamming inside of him, it
sent a shudder down his spine, unintentionally clenching down on the cock
inside of him.
 
“Fuck!” He heard the older man moan.
 
Tora grabbed his ass tightly with both hands and then flipped their positions. 
The older man pounded into Aki relentlessly, the younger one squirming with
pleasure.  Tora buried his head into the teen’s neck placing sloppy wet kisses
along the skin. Aki could feel the pace becoming more erratic, knowing the
older man would release soon; he stroked his own neglected erection.  Only a
few tugs, and he was cumming onto both of their smooth stomachs.  He made sure
to clench around the cock inside of him as hard as he could, within literally
seconds Tora was releasing inside of him, the warm liquid filling him up,
seeping out slowly, Aki moaned just at the feeling. Tora collapsed onto him,
panting hard, they both trying to catch their breaths.
 
Tora pulled out of him, flopping down next to the younger one.  “I’m going to
hell.”
 
Aki chuckled, “No, I am.”
 
The older man turned his head, looking at the very young face before him, “How
could I let this happen?”
 
This time Aki turned looking into those beautiful eyes, “Because you care.”
 
Their gaze was intense, the joking aside, everything turned serious.  “You’re
so—“
 
“Young.” Aki finished, and then continued, “Yes, I am young.  According to you,
really fucking young.”  He let himself grin. “That doesn’t matter.  Call me
naïve, whatever.  I have lived, loved, fucked, and drugged, myself through
life.  I can’t even relate to friends my age.”  He let out a sigh he was so
tired.
 
Tora lovingly stroked his hair, offering his comfort, even though every part of
him was fighting it.
 
“Thank you, Tora.” It came out as a whisper even though he meant to voice it
loudly.
 
He could tell that the older man was fighting with himself inside; after all he
just fucked a fourteen-year-old boy who he was sworn to protect.
 
“I’m ready to go now.”
 
“Aki…” Tora’s voice was the most desperate he ever heard, but he chose to block
it out.
 
“Please, as lovely as you are…you will never be Kenzo.   No one will be.” Aki
shifted, sitting up in the bed, looking out the window, for a moment he heard
Kenzo’s voice, You and I will grow old together, nasty as fuck but still
wanting to fuck!  Aki giggled to himself, of course the voice was in his head,
but it was so very Kenzo, which made him believe it was real.
 
All emotion he felt towards Tora suddenly left him, and he wanted nothing more
than for the other to leave.
 
“Please, go.” His voice was shaking.
 
“Aki—“
 
“Go!” This time he shouted.
 
Tora got off the bed, gathering his clothes and left the room quietly without
another word. Those actions showed Aki that the other did not truly care about
him but he was just a vessel. Then it dawned on him, that he was truly naïve,
and far to young.  But it didn’t matter anymore.  His mind was consumed of
nothing but Kenzo.
 
If it weren’t for his foolishness, young behavior, maybe Kenzo would be alive. 
Kenzo was at the party, only for him, snorting cocaine for him, dying for him. 
It was all too much to handle.
 
With trembling legs, Aki stood from his bed, walking down the stairs into his
father’s study.  Tora was already long gone. There in the drawer of his
father’s desk was a handgun, what kind, Aki didn’t know for sure, but did it
matter?  Of course not. Taking the gun in his hand, seeing that it was indeed
loaded.  The barrel passed through his trembling lips, tears once again falling
from his tired eyes. His finger pressed slightly on the trigger, just a little
bit more pressure and he would be dead. Dead like Kenzo. Without hesitation he
added the pressure, a loud bang echoing throughout the house.
 
I’ll never leave you Aki trust me.  You are the only one for me.
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