Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/13100310. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Major_Character_Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage Category: F/M, M/M Fandom: 방탄소년단_|_Bangtan_Boys_|_BTS Relationship: Min_Yoongi_|_Suga/Original_Female_Character Character: BTS_|_Park_Jimin, BTS_|_Min_Yoongi_(Agust_D), BTS_|_Kim_Seokjin, BTS_| Kim_Taehyung, BTS_|_Jung_Hoseok, BTS_|_Kim_Namjoon, BTS_|_Jeon_Jungkook Additional Tags: multiple_personality, Gore, Blood, Rape/Non-con_-_Freeform, Torture, psychotic, Betrayal, Kidnapping, eventual_smut_but_it_lasts_for_like_ten chapters_straight_so, Intermissions, prewritten, Oral_Sex, Penetration, Orgy_(idk) Stats: Published: 2017-12-22 Chapters: 26/26 Words: 38871 ****** Tongue Technology || Agust D ****** by Mincity Summary "You were stupid enough to fall into my trap. You let me, a total stranger, into your life. Really, it's like you really wanted this all to happen... stop crying you stupid bitch." "Yoongi-" Smack. "You know my name." She takes a minute to catch her breath. "Aug- Agust D. Please," "Please what, princess? You want me to fuck your tight little hole again or what?" "Anything! Just please don't kill me or anyone else." She sobs some more but all it gets her is another blow to the face. I can't help but feel sympathetic to her but I'm heartless, as usual. "Get back on your knees. I'll do whatever I want. Bitch, I own you."     Or : Yoongi befriends Areum And gets her to trust him only to torture her. Notes I posted this on Wattpad but I horribly unappreciated there. I get too much criticism so I brought it here. I hope it doesn’t get the same treatment. It took me seven months to write this book. ***** Chapter 1 ***** • 2017 •   I started off so innocent, and pure. Full of potential, too. I had a plan. A plan to be successful. And it would've worked out fine if it weren't for... I don't even know what to call him at this point. My stalker. My boyfriend. My lover. My rapist. Min Yoongi. Agust D...       That last one is probably the right choice. It's not important. This is the story of how I fell in love with my greatest tormentor. A monster. He ruined my fucking life.           My name is Areum Choi. Only daughter to  Cheol-Min and Mae-Young Choi.       • 2011 •   Of course the firsts day of the rest of my life started off good and fine. Business as usual and nothing was wrong. I was in a great mood. My parents, whom we're currently divorcing weren't arguing at the top of their lungs this morning when I went downstairs for breakfast. Good thing, but rare. But isn't everyone always in a great mood when it's their last day of school. Senior year is ending for me and all of the studying translated to perfect grades. High ass GPA and I've been accepted to a top university in Seoul. "Which means my precious baby will be leaving us and heading to Korea! Are you sure we can't come with you? I need my daughter." "Mom!" I try to squirm out of her death grip she's got around my shoulders. "Let the girl go, Mae!" My father says from the kitchen. I hear the sizzling of his cooking from the dining room. Skipping graduation just to get a two week head start on my career is a bold move that everyone is against, but they don't get a say. I'm moving out in four days. I'll be on my own at seventeen years old.                 Something about high school that I definitely won't miss are the uniforms. Fucking plaid. I hate plaid. Guys like to flip our skirts to see our underwear and I find that everything but flattering. That's one thing I could never hope for. High school romances, no matter how cliché, was my dream. I stayed away from it though. Quite successfully. Love is intangible enough. Don't make it worse by trying to figure it out before you're ready. There's plenty of time for that in Korea. I park my car in my usual space next to the big maple tree that I sit under for afternoon reading and peace. One last deep breath before I have to labor through my last day here. This is where it ended. I remember everything that happened here so vividly. Everything was fine until I had to get out of the car. I turned my keys in the ignition. I noticed how no one else was really here. Just a few bystanders. And then he drove up next to me, honked the horn, got annoyed because I ignored him and tried to walk into the school instead of acknowledging his presence and then before I knew it....   I was blushing. And he was smirking.   As I explained clearly before, I've had a lack of romance in my life. So when this attractive older guy was showing clear attraction to me... I got weak. But we're just getting started on this one.     *****     "I have to go to class." God forbid I miss my last day of school. "Isn't it the last day? Why don't you skip it?" He said this so cooly that I felt like... well a nerd. I can't bring up my perfect attendance that I've held since I was eight. That's like boy repellent. I take a small breath and glance somewhere else. When I look back at this handsome stranger he gives me a 'come on, it'll be fun' look. "Okay," If I only I didn't just say this so shyly. It doesn't matter he's smiling right now. "Where would we go?" Finally feeling nervous about being with a sketchy stranger in a fucking van. A black van should set off an immediate warning. "How about..." "Somewhere public." Finally I say something that reflects on my smarts. "Of course, but don't worry. You're safe around me." He shoots me another smile but I fades. "What's your name, beautiful child?" I laugh. "Areum Choi." I blush again and look down. "What's your name, handsome stranger?" "Min Yoongi," He answers plainly. "Min Yoongi?" "Sure," He waves me off. "Now get in." Of course I oblige and do as he asks. My parents won't be too mad since I'm basically an adult anyway. It's the last day. Last chance to have some of what I've missed out during these four years. Even if he's older...         He rolled the windows down just enough so the rapid wind could get caught in my light brown hair. Turning the radio up loud enough so that he could, goofily, sing along to Call Me Maybe. All to make me laugh. I already like Yoongi. "So where to, Areum?" He asks with a cheerful smile. "Your choice since I saved you from hell. I'm mean school. Choose something fun." He put his eyes back on the road and never breaks his grin. "Uhm, I don't know." I never do anything fun in this town. I mean, I know its the L.A, but with all of my studies and hard work... Without sounding too mainstream. "How about the park? The one with the big fountain?" The only place I ever hang out at, for the tranquility. "Alrighty," With one right turn I can see that we're already on our way to the place of my choosing. "So tell me about yourself?" "Only if you do the same." I instinctively tug on my seat belt strap. "Of course I will," He resumes that bright perfect smile. "Well what's to know about me? Hm... now that I think about it I'm pretty boring." "Let's start with your favorites then." I look at his eyes. They shine with a deep hazel that complements his deep black hair. "Favorites... my favorite color would have to be... blue, like really light blue." "Pastel?" "Yes! That's exactly it." "That's mine too." He smiles fondly again. "Look at us! We already have things in common." "I think my favorite food is anything Mexican. I love things like Latin dishes." I continue. "What about you?" "Well I'm originally from Korea, and I've always loved our traditional foods." I gasp. "Really? You're from Korea? I'm moving there in four days to attend Kyung Hee University." "I was heading back tomorrow night. Wow, this is like... destiny." "Really? Tomorrow night seems sudden." We're almost there. "Not really. I've been planning for a few weeks now. I just wanted to hang out with a beautiful girl before I headed back." "Then why did you end up with me?" I joke. "Because you exceeded my standards." The smile creeps back again and this time I smile in return.       •| intermission |• Once upon a time a quiet hard-working student, who had achieved everything she'd worked hard for, met a boy. He didn't seem to have any goals, or any achievements. But she thought she could fix him. •| intermission |•       As we arrive at the fountain I sit on the rim of it. That's when a really great conversation breaks out. "How do you plan on creating an entire rapping career without any reasonable plans?" "Don't worry about that. I've got connections." He smirks. "Connections? Yoongi, that sounds sketchy as hell." "That's how I meant it honestly. I just mean that I know a lot of guys in the music industry that can help me get where I want to be." "That sounds amazing. I've never known anyone famous before." "And I've never know a damn doctor before! That's like the ultimate success in Korea. Your parents must be proud." "Oh, they're proud. They've been trying to convince me to let them come live with me. I don't know how to tell me mother no without-" "Rejecting her?" He cuts in with a smile. "Yeah..." How does he do it? I love how someone I just met already knows me so well from just the hour we've spent together. A cloud in the sky shifts and the sun shines brightly in my face, causing me to squint my eyes. Yoongi's hand rests on my knee but with my oh-so-special instincts I freak out and boom! Dead in the water. Literally. I'm such a clutz that I fall backwards into the fountain. I immediately see Yoongi's hand emerge towards me helping me out of the fountain of water, pulling me out. I stand there in the fountain, with my school uniform clinging to my wet skin and my tie wrapped around my neck. I try to untangle it and struggle, which must look like a cry for help to Yoongi because he starts to help, leaning dangerously close over the water. As a spur of the moment, completely spontaneous, with his arms still near my neck I tug on them just hard enough for Yoongi to come flying into the water landing onto of me. The water is freezing all over my body and there's a constant spout right above our heads that's spraying water directly onto us. His baggy clothes hang soaking off of his body. The line of his v-neck hugs damply onto his chest, defining his abs. Swoon. "You're insane!" His heavenly laughter begins to light up again. "Now look at us, doctor." He's standing closer to me more than earlier and I can feel him coming closer to my body with his. Before I really know what's happening, Yoongi's deep brown eyes are starring into mine fondly, as if we've known each other our whole lives and not just two hours. His large hand finds its place beneath my chin, drops of water rolling down my face and his. He's leaning inwards... as if he's aiming his lips for mine. That's when it snaps. I don't know this man. I lean away from him. "We should probably get out of these clothes!" My outburst only seems to make him smirk. "I didn't mean it like... that." "I know what you meant. Should I drop you off at home?" "Ah... I can't. My parents would freak out if I came home early from school." I motion down my wet body. "Especially looking like this." "I... I mean you can hang out at my place until school's over. I've got extra clothes unpacked." I think he gets nervous of his words because he tries to cover them up quickly. "I don't mean like... I'm not some creep trying to lure you into my house or anything-" "I get it." I laugh.   "I trust you."     Big mistake. ***** Protect ***** Chapter Two : Protect   • 2011 • My name is Areum Choi. A girl of big ambition, and bad luck.         Min Yoongi's house was common. Standard for a bachelor of his age and someone that was moving soon. The mid-afternoon sun shone through the windows, all stripped of their shades and curtains. The rays of the sunlight landed on the white carpet, all stripped of its furniture. The only room he says is still furnished is his bedroom, and not much of it. On my way to the master bathroom, I saw it was just a single queen sized mattress on the ground and one lamp. "Everything else is in storage. I'll sell it and buy new stuff in Korea." He says. I currently stand on the tile floor of his bathroom, still dripping wet from earlier while he, also still wet, trifles through his drawers to find suitable clothes. "Just a sec," He reassures me when I cross my arms, starting to shiver. He walks in with a bundle in his muscular arms. "Clothes for me, and clothes for you." He goofily smiles again. "Thanks," I expect him to leave and dress in the other room or show me a room in which I can get undressed but he doesn't. No, Yoongi just begins to undress here in front of me while I stand frozen. "Aren't you going to...?" The shock ends. "Oh! Yes..." This is the first time I've ever undressed in front of a man. I don't hate this, the way he try's to be subtle about admiring my waist. I can tell he's trying not to come across to me as a pervert. Don't worry, I'm admiring the hard work you clearly put into those abs. I pull the sweats over my legs, and hang my bra over the shower rod, slightly touching him in the process. There's fog forming on the mirror as if we're hyperventilating together and his bathroom is just small enough that when I'm hanging things over the shower rod and he's still dressing, he's gently pressed against me. My wet hair still drips, as I turn around still silent. "Sorry, my hair dryer is packed away somewhere." Yoongi barely says this above a whisper, after he finishes putting his clothes on. I'm facing him and look long enough to see the soft expression on his face. His hand moves to touch mine, and grabs it. Something doesn't feel right. "You look cute in my clothes." I think he senses my uneasiness, following a stranger into his house, getting fully naked in front of him just like that. "Are you hungry?" He let's go of my hand and walks into the kitchen. "I left some stuff in the pantry just in case." "Yeah, sure." I should probably get out of here as soon as possible though. "Let's see..." I hear him in the pantry searching. "I've got some ramen and... jelly? I don't remember buying jelly. Anyway, there's ramen!" "Ramens cool." I wander into his living room. "No kitchen table though." The rifling stops. "Oh, I did not think about that." He chuckles at himself. He grabs the two plastic containers and smiles all the way to the microwave. "I was just thinking, Areum-ssi." He speaks for the kitchen. I look at him through then one opening from the living room questioningly. "We're both moving out to Seoul... in the near future, right? Why don't we remain friends? And hang out!" He cracks a half smile, as if the other half isn't going to come out until I agree and if I decline it'll vanish. I don't want to responsible for the disappearance of Yoongi's... beautiful smile. "Yeah... sure." His entire smile lights up, as the microwave emits a quiet ding! signaling the ramen is finished. What's the harm in remaining friends? I'm not sure if my parents would be okay with it. But who says they have to know? Yoongi seems harmless enough. I mean, like he said earlier, all he wanted... was a friend on his last day America. "You sound hesitant." He says, turning his back to me. He sounds angry that there's even a sliver of a chance of me not wanting to be around him. "Well, I am. We just met, like, four hours ago." I hear him let out a frustrated sigh and murmur something incoherent. "Are you okay?" "Yeah!" He faces me with a forced smile. He seems frustrated. "Why don't we meet up in Seoul? I know it's kind of big but still..." "Yeah, I'm going to Kyung Hee so it's on the way." "Perfect."       •| intermission |• Once upon a time, a man and a woman had a daughter. They taught her to never talk to strangers or to get into a strangers car. She listened, for the most part but eventually one man broke down her walls. For all the wrong reasons. •| intermission |•       After we're finished eating, I help Yoongi clean up. We're both standing; silently at the sink working on the dishes, when he finally breaks the silence between us and asks me a question. "Do you think your school is out of session yet? I can drive you home if you're ready." I think for a moment and answer him clearly. "Yeah, it's probably over by now." I dry my hands with a towel. "Hopefully my uniform is dry by now." He grabs his keys and slips on his shoes at the door. "Should be." I go back into his bathroom and look around as I pull my clothes from the shower rod, article by article. As I'm redressing, I can't help but notice a smaller photo album underneath the sink. When I pull it out, simply out of curiosity, I find that it's been labeled with tape as a single and subtle word. Her... Min Yoongi doesn't seem like the type to have had a girlfriend or maybe a girl that he's in love with, but I can't tell because he's got a small padlock on the zippers, not allowing me to unzip it either way. Fuck, now I'm going to be thinking about this all night. I allow myself to fool around with the little book for a few minutes longer. Just so that I'm sure that there's no way to view the private "photos" that it contains. Just long enough that Yoongi begins to call me from the front door. I can hear his keys jingling, ready to drive me home. "Areum? You ready to go?" He begins, but I can hear a smirk etch it's way into his voice. "Or are you becoming fond of me?" He sounds nothing short of cocky with each word, but he's right. I push the small, not for my eyes, album back into it's orginal place and take an extra few seconds (or maybe it was minutes giving by the tone of his voice. Annoyance. "I'm coming!" And by the time I'm back into the living room, he's already gotten into the car and started it. "I had no idea you weren't of patience," I smile and poke his cheek. A small part of me wonders if that was weird, but I feel like I've goten close to him during the short few hours that I spent with him, and not at school like a good girl. My thoughts are dismissed when he answers my boldness with a slight chuckle. "It's not that I'm impatient," "Oh! So I'm just slow-moving?" I continue to play with the man. He doesn't answer. We're in my driveway. Thankfully, my parents aren't home, since they'll be at the school for graduation. He turns the engine off and I notice just how dark it's gotten, that I can see the frosty air hit the windsheild of his van. "I don't know why I feel like I don't want to let you get out of the car. Like I want to keep you with me forever." His words don't phase me in the way that I expected. I'm relived. I had previously thought that maybe, Yoongi was annoyed by me. I found that he's just naturally... stoic in a way that can be confused with disinterest. "I strangely feel the same way." I don't even look at him when I basically agree with his words. He doesn't say much else, but instead looks at me. Without even thinking about I'm doing, and how it might change things, I lean forward. Meaning to kiss him. Him. This man that I don't even know. A total stranger that picked me up at school like a creep, in a black van. Like a predator. Like a criminal getting me flowers or some shit. It's a terrible idea. I might regret it. It goes against every thing my amazing (sometimes amazing) parents have taught me. To never get into a stranger's car, let alone to initiate a fucking kiss with one in his car. But still I lean in because... I want to. I want to kiss those, plump pink Korean lips. But it was a mistake to initiate this. Because he turns his face, just as soon as I ghost my lips over his being. The land gently on his cheek, but trust and believe that I'm satisfied. I get embarassed, obviously, and turn my face forward again. Looking away from him, and allowing my lock brown ringlets to cover my already bright red face. My mind drifts back to his photo album. I was probably right about it being about a girl. Someone that he loves, or has loved before and maybe still does. How could I be so stupid? When I finally work up the courage to say something after what feels like ten or fifteen minutes, I decide that it should be an apology. "Listen, Yoongi, I'm... I knew that it wouldn't be a good idea to-" But I'm cut off by him reassuring me, nervously. "No! It was my fault." I discovered earlier that he was not good in awkward situations, being observative as usual. When I finally look back at him, I find that his face is even redder than mine. Reminding me that he's not much older than I am. "It was my fault. But...." I hear his seatbelt being unbuckled and his arm snakes around my waist like a serpant. He looks me in the eyes, meaningfully. Like I'm the only girl on the planet. Like we're the only people on the planet.     "Haven't your parent's ever told you that you shouldn't kiss strangers?" ***** Befriend ***** Chapter Three : Befriend   • 2011 •   My name is Areum Choi. A girl that seems to be losing herself in a man that is fond of lies.     I'm shaken, but excited. I kissed him. I mean, not on the lips but in general. Why is skin so warm? His cheeks are so soft. My walk back to the front door was mortifying. I could feel his eyes burning on my back. My heart was beating so rapidly that I could barely breathe all the way up the stairs. The heated pitch blackness of this night is closing in on me, just reminding me of how much of a mistake it was to kiss a total stranger. He was so inviting though. When I finally make it back to the front door, I wave at him like a child. I can barely see through the bright hase of Yoongi's van headlights, that he's waving back and then... he's driving away down the street leaving me to wonder... Will I ever see him again? I make it up to my room and take immediate notice of the clothes that have been clearly set out by my, erratic, mother. I've got about an hour to hurry up and get to the high school for our graduation. As I dress myself in the sexiest dress I've ever put on in my life, only to cover it with the black cap and gown, my thoughts never cease. I should've gotten his number or some contact information. I shouldn't have just gotten out like that. Most girls would find that incredibly creepy, a man just driving up on the school grounds and offering to take this girl away on the last day of school like a movie. Claiming that all he really wanted was a friend before he moved away to the exact same place she's going to within days for college. This doesn't make much sense and it's all too convienient. Damn it. I already miss him. I miss him, and I don't even know him.       "Choi Areum, class president and valedictorian!" I walk up on stage and take my diploma like it's the prize I've hyped it to be all four years of high school. I was never popular in high school, but those who were? Look at them now. They'll be wishing they were me. "Congradulations, Class Of 2010!" The last thing I hear is my principal yelling this into the microphone. The last thing I see is my parents, smiling brightly and proudly and taking nonstop pictures of me. The last thing I do is smile as brightly as possible. The last thing I think is.. finally. All before my eyes land on a singled out figure in the crowd. One with pitch black hair and a mysterious smirk. Making my heart beat impossibly faster.     •| intermission |• Once upon a time, there was a girl whom was hard-working and unsure. There was a man whom was completely sure of what he wanted. He wanted her. •| intermission |•         He's gone before I can approach him, but I spot his car cruising slowly and trying not to draw any attention to himself. I approach him with a smirk and rest my head on his windowsill. "Miss me?" I joke. "I missed your lips." He captures me in a kiss and I make no action to deny his mouth, not caring about the people here. When I pull away, a deep blush covers my face like a sheet. "Hop in," And I do.             "And they didn't even ask me if I wanted to go to a stupid grad party. You know, they want me to act like a fucking adult but they think they can still boss me around like a kid. Fuck that. I can't wait to get out of here." I vent to him, as we pass nothing but pitch black skies. "Then lets go," He says plainfully, and keeping his eyes on the road. I look at him. "What?" "What's stopping you?" He laughs. "Everything is packed and flown to your residence in Korea and it's not like you're not an adult. Your flight leaves in like two hours, right? I'll just take you right now." I look at Yoongi incrediously, "You're joking, right? Just bail on everyone?" He smirks and takes a turn in the direction of LAX without even looking, scaring me shitless I might add. "Like I said, who's stopping you?"           "Alright, I canceled your ticket in coach." "And you have a private jet? Who the fuck are you, James Bond?" I joke, looking at literally everything with curiosity. "I wish, but no. Just have rich & absent parents." I nod understandingly, before sitting down across from Yoongi. "I can't believe I let you convince me to do this." I squeal. "But you're happy you did it." Yoongi crouches in front of me, a leans in to kiss me again. I pull away having him just barely miss my lips. "Maybe... we should get to know each other a little?" I smile, awkwardly. "Of course."       There's a fourteen hour flight to the country of my dreams by which I get to know a man. This man becomes my best friend. ***** Pretty ***** Chapter Four : Pretty     • 2011 •   My name is Areum Choi. Someone that was blessed with an attractive appearance but a sensitive personality.                   Min Yoongi and I aren't the luckiest set of friends.     Once the plane touched down in Seoul, we both agreed to meet at a regular cafe. He set my phone's GPS to find the café when I finished handling my school arrangements. In the meantime, I think he went to an audition but he decided to go quite abruptly and it didn't seem like he really wanted to go there to begin with. Almost like he knew he wouldn't pass the audition. Or if he knew he definitely would. That was at least five hours ago. Give or take a few minutes. I've taken care of my responsibilities. I called my mother first thing. She and my father aren't the slightest bit angry at me for skipping out on then like that, just a bit annoyed with me. I'm sure they'll get over it. Of course, when they asked why I didn't tell them it's because of a guy I met as a stranger and ran away from home with. But holy hell, I'm in Seoul. This is a personal dream of mine that I've been dead set on achieving for years now. I'm actually Chinese and I don't even speak Korean fluently, but I don't care at this point. I stare at my surroundings, nuzzling my cheeks further into the maroon knit infinity scarf capturing a brief moment of warmth and defense against the cold and chilly Korean air. And look around in an awed view of the beautiful people whom surround me. My phone lets me know that I'm already there, or technically a few feet past it. "Areum!" I hear a velvety voice behind me, only to turn around and see my friend waving me from the glass doors of Blind Alley. I don't speak but turn back around, blushing that I actually almost got lost; even with the GPS on my phone, clutched between my fingers. "Fuck, it's freezing out there." He notes that, clearly been inside this heated building for more than half an hour. I take in my surroundings, and of the smells of freshly brewed coffee, the fully-stocked bookshelves and the subtle Lana Del Rey (maybe the Korean version of her) filling my ears swiftly and with welcome. The in-scents burning on the table invade my nostrils, and for a brief moment block the iron coffee smell, prevent me from listening to Yoongi as he tells me about his audition. "So, you're an aesthetic person?" He chuckles, with the ability to bring me out of my much enjoyed daze. "How do you know?" I ask, as if it's not really that obvious but I was starring at the koi fountain the whole time wishing I were a fish. It's pretty clear. "I'm one too." And for a second Min Yoongi blushes. I've only ever known his tough exterior, but I'm the only one (currently) that he's let in this far. He can be somewhat cold sometimes, granted I can annoying, but he has more cold moments than warm moments. Despite the warm moments we spend together, moments like this. His eyes hold a certain glimmer hinting that he's really glad that we share more in common, and that traveling together brought that to light. I'm not going to question anything else. No matter the questions I've had lately and the actions he took to meet me, to kiss me, to get me here... But a smart person would question him. "Yeah, that's why this place is one of my favorite spots in the city." His eyes get a faraway look to them, as he runs a hand through his jet black hair. I can't help but find him more aesthetic than the café itself. There's always a light pink tint to his cheeks (at least when I'm around him) and a slight glaze to his eyes. He seems a bit sullen all of the time, like when we first meet up to hang out. It takes him some time to get into his regular personality, happy and somewhat cheerful. I mean, he goes through lots of changes though. Like once we first touched down his mind shifted. He became all business. That's what he seemed to only think about. The audition, the need to become successful and with his own music. I can not relate to his passion for his music. I've always been missing that creativity. The only reason I'm becoming a doctor is because that's what my parents raised me to become, and it's just another thing I won't question. A cynical question nags at the back of my mind, one that I shouldn't neglect like the rest, no matter how rude it'll sound. "What were you doing in America to begin with?" If he grew up here, and had business here, what was so important in L.A? I try to ask him this without seeming too nosy or anything, but I feel like it backfired. A certain expression crosses him, like a mix of a scowl and a grimace but with a tinge of anger. I've pissed him off. He takes a few seconds and inhales, brushes his dark strands away from his eyes, then shoots me a daring look. That's another thing about Yoongi. He's easily pissed off. One of the main things we talked about was how much he'd want his friends to understand is that he's got a temper. A really short one at that but he's doing his best. I can tell. "Nothing serious, there's just," Yoongi interrupts himself just to look through the window, at a passerby. Sexy young female, wearing flashy (yet almost nonexistent) clothes and she's winking at him. This I only see through my peripheral view, but it makes me sick to think of him being attracted to girls like that. The ones with no morals, whom don't share his interests in music. I've only known him for a short time, but I know Yoongi invests his everything into the music industry. That whore that passed him? She's doing that to everything with a penis. She's not special. "There's plenty of sights to see." He winks at me as well.     That same sick feeling comes back.         •| intermission |• Once upon a time, a smart girl thought highly off a man she trusted. He was her poison and she was his dream come true. His dream was to find someone clueless enough to poison. •| intermission |•       "It's almost five thirty." Yoongi squeezes my hand just a bit tighter, heating me up. He smiles at me again. Something he's been subjecting me to for quite some time, even in the short few hours we've spent here. "You don't have to check in at the dorms until like what? Nine?" He doesn't look at me but instead focuses his attention on a similar thing to earlier. Instead of an actual girl, a store with nude females in the window. Pictures of them. Completely naked. This seems to completely take him away from me. His attention. His presence. He's focused on these naked girls. I feel his grip on my hand loosen drastically and his speed decreases. Completely focused on this porn. I mean the store that's hosting these vulgar images is clearly an adult video store. Min Yoongi likes porn. I'd never thought of him like that but clearly investing my trust in a stranger is turning out badly. I allow my jealousy to pull him along the sidewalk without really saying much else. Maybe he wouldn't be interested with me anyway. I'm not Korean. He's been paying more attention to his own nationality. It doesn't take an idiot to discover his ideal type, but it's not really a big deal anyway. I'm fine with it. He's just my friend. I don't think I'd ever want that to change. "Areum? Baby girl, don't walk so fast." His words cause my heart to leap and fight rapidly. I still can't stop the slight tear dip down the curve of my cheek. I'm fine but... The crowded streets of Seoul are nowhere to have an emotional episode so I pull myself together and force myself to get out of my feelings. A terrible feeling pools in the pit of my stomach  and my checks heat up so much, I'm sure they'll engulf me in flames any minute here. "Areum, what's the matter with you? Are you crying? What happened?" I stay looking away from him and don't bother to answer his question. But that's not fair, he didn't do anything wrong. Not intentionally, so I can't become distant towards him. The icy breeze nips at the back of my neck, almost as if to say; stop being a bitch and talk to him. When I do turn around, Yoongi's arms stretch out to squeeze me in a tight hold. The hug immediately warms me up and kills the chills and shivers that I was previously cursed with. I hum as I nuzzle my face into his pale skin. His body temperature seems to be naturally low so when it comes to who's heating who up, I'm the one working. "Fuck," He growls in my ear. "Your hair smells so nice." I can't help but let out a flurry of giggles. Why is Min Yoongi so damn cute? You'll never see him the way I do. I knew him first. I'm the only one he ever let in. Let in to see the real him. And as far as I can tell...   The real him is art. ***** Acquaint ***** There's going to be Korean in this so make sure to pay attention to the translations in bold once you start seeing words you don't recognize. I don't write Hangul, I just kind of translate the sound words to romanization so it's easier for non-speakers to follow along. And also, please bear in mind that this is a smut book. It's eventual but once it hits, I'm going to be really insane with it. Reader discretion is advised.     Chapter Five : Acquaint   • 2011 •   My name is Areum Choi. A girl that's been searching her whole life for something completely intangible but is now spending every second of the day with that exact thing.         I'm not sure when I started locking my door at night. Maybe when I found out that my dorm is unisex, just crawling with horny guys ready to prey on me; the girl that isn't yet fluent in their language. Whom it wouldn't be difficult to talk into anything. It could've been the day I moved in and my parents called for an update on how it went. I talked to them for about an hour, still not telling them about Yoongi. I know fully well they would reject him. He's six years older than me, and I don't even have to ask them to know they'd disapprove. Anyway (towards the end of the phone call) my mother not so sneakily made sure to stress how people would take advantage of me because of my differences, and to always lock my bedroom door at night. Then I distinctly remember dad taking the phone from her and hanging up with 'Have fun, bunny. Love you!' Or maybe it could've been the night I started sneaking him in. Every single night, just until my actual roommate arrives, he comes into my room. I can hear him kick his shoes off, trying to be quiet. He crawls into the bed with me, straddling me for a second to eventually maneuver until he's back hugging me. Arms wrapped securely around my waist as if I would up and vanish if he didn't hug me tight enough. I've gotten used to him whispering my ears in exchange for a response, like a hum or something. Anything audible to let him know that he wasn't the only one awake at that moment. The way he attempts to sleep with this socks on on while he sleeps but ultimately finds them uncomfortable; kicks them off and eventually tangled his ankles with mine. I even love when he's so freezing cold (more when he naturally is) that I can tell he probably spent a good few minutes outside, working up the courage to sneak inside of the building. I've fallen for these moments in which I break the rules just a little, and just for this person. "Suga," I call him by my chosen nickname and check to see if he's awake. A small snore answers my call so I decide against speaking anymore. "Yes, Min Areum?" I involuntarily chuckle at his words. It's three in the morning, and he's still awake enough to call me his own nicknames. When did he even come up with that? It's clever. Almost like if I called him Choi Yoongi. "I can't sleep." I moan out, whiny like a little kid even if kids annoy him just a bit. "Well I can," His face nuzzles further into my neck and I feel him shift behind me, trying to find a better angle to sleep. "Let's play a game." I suggest jokingly, but I can already feel the drags of sleep about to pull me back into slumber. It's three A.M, and my first class of the year starts at seven sharp, so I'm nothing short of grateful for the return of my sleepy feeling. "Mhm, not unless you let me pick the game." He whispers. There something in his tone that I don't recognize. "Okay, go for it." I shift my body and turn to meet his face, a pale smirk looking back at me. Yoongi leans over to whisper a silent 'don't move.' in my ear before he gets up, and leans over me. "What are you doing?" I can just barely make out his expression, it's dark just like my bedroom. There's a small sliver of the orange streetlight coming in through the blinds that just so happens to catch on his face, giving him an eery I'm about to kill you look. "We're playing a game, remember?" This just rushes out before straddling my waist and bringing my hands to around his neck. At the same time, Yoongi leans down towards me and just barely graces his lips against mine. He's so close I can taste the coffee on him, but he's not fully touching me. I expect him to (when he's ready) crash his lips onto mine, but he doesn't. That's just like him, to make me sure of his next action only to find that he doesn't go through with it. To make me be the one to make the first one, knowing that I'm not outgoing. To smirk as I force my lips onto his, hungrily attack his soft pink lips with my own and doing my best to flip our position so that I'm in charge, so that I'm the dominant. Once I'm successfully on top of him, I can't help but moan in satisfaction, still not breaking the kiss. He returns the sound but with a groan. More of frustration. I feel his hands grope at my thighs but he's clearly trying his best to keep himself from grabbing my ass. My hand stay on either side of his head, trying to keep my balance but I feel the strain creeping through. Our lips move and melt perfectly together and at a nonstop pace and it's art. It's not just two people, who barely know each other making out, no. This is two once strangers losing themselves in each other. I can feel his care radiating from his mouth. I positively dread this moment of having to break away from him for the sake of breathing. A slim thread of saliva connects us (I can feel it) at the lips, but I'm too out of breath it wipe it away. I fall back onto the pillows ready to pass out. "That was my first kiss." He sits up and leans over me again, tongue poking out just a bit, straddling me with a satisfied smirk. "Well, get ready for your second kiss." His husky voice assaults my ears. This time I'm ready.     •| intermission |• He's the cat, and she's the mouse. And he doesn't like to tease his prey. •| intermission |•     "Choi... Areum? Is it Chinese?" "Yes, but I speak the majority of the Korean language." I quickly nod to reassure the man. "Sure you do, I just don't want you to act handicapped in here. I'm not slowing down my lecture for anyone. I'm a difficult professor, and if you think that you can't handle this, please drop my class." My papers are carelessly pushed back at me and I'm looking at his back as he is walking away from me. Yeah, he's gay. He's dressing better than me and he twists his hips better than me. Oh, let's be mean to the new girl simply because she's a little different. Please, I'm not dropping this class. I didn't work that hard just to drop it. I cautiously look for a seat for the year. Not to close too the professor that already hates me but not too close that I can't hear him and fall behind. Definitely not in the center though. A lecture hall consists of a large bleacher like scatter of seats. They sit on at least seven or eight stairs and in front of them, the teachers desk and white board. There's a cluster of desks being occupied by that oh-so-cliché group of girls. Wearing too much makeup, trying to look extra sexy for, I'm assuming, our gay professor. The type of girls Yoongi shows interest in. The type of girl that he wants. When I sit down in my decided seat it matches all of my preferences down to the mark. The girl next to me starts mumbling at the sight of my laptop (the sticker with my name on it) and then gasps. "Jung-gug salam-ieyo? Naneum jeon-e oegug-in-eul mannan jeog-i eobsda. 10 sal ttaebuteo." (Are you from China? I've never met a foreigner before. Not before the age of, like, ten.) The first time someone has started speaking to me in Korean so fast, before I even had a chance to say hey, I'm from America. She seems excited though. "Ah," I start but she interrupts me before I even have a chance to fail horribly at my attempt of Korean. Yoongi has been piecing together his limited amount of English for my sake but I'll have to meet him in the middle eventually. "O, jeongmal mianhae!" Her hands race to cover her mouth in mock shock. "Jung- gug-eoneun yuchanghaeyahabnida. Naneun eotteon ablyeogdo gahago sipji anhseubnida.” (Oh, I'm so sorry! You must only be fluent in Chinese. I don't want to add any pressure.) The main bell; signaling that if we're not seated we're late to class interrupts this flushed girl next to me. She's clearly embarrassed, and it's the cutest thing ever. The way her little pink lips curl into an 'o' shape. Her hands squeeze at her own pudgy cheeks, trying to get them to not heat up and become red in front of everyone, but she ultimately decides to let her dark hair cover her face completely. Once the lecture begins, I sneak a glance at her name tag. She knows my name, so it's only fair that I know hers. And it's almost as cute as her.   Kim Hyuri.         I've packed my supplies ahead of time, sticking my pages of notes for the day in a binder. The broad title still pokes out 'Basic Safety & Sanitary Means Of Carrying Medical Equipment, Unit One.' And as soon as the bell rings; go wherever you have to go now, and a loud "Class dismissed!" From our gay professor, I tap Hyuri on the shoulder. "Ohmygosh," I guess I surprised her. "Areum, he..llo." Hyuri patronizes me in English. Dragging out the word as if I'm incompetent and can not understand my mother language. "I speak English." I warn her with an edge in my tone, not failing to surprise her again. Jesus Christ she's so vanilla. "Hyuri, I'm from America." I shrug and eventually along my bag over my shoulder. "You just never gave a moment to tell you." I laugh a bit, hand her a pink pen that she almost forgot. "I-I'm sorry I assumed. I speak English well too." She looks down at her feet and whispers awkwardly. I begin walking down the stairs ahead of her and through the double doors, her small frame following closely behind. "That's okay, but these classes are not. I swear they're never ending." I dramatically groan to her, my unwitting confident. "Hey, but it'll be worth it someday right?" She hopelessly asks me. People in the halls pass by and look at us like we're out of my minds, speaking a completely different language from them. "Our, wish whats the word? Our... learning? Our learning is important." "Maybe our education?" I offer, continuing towards the next hallway for another lecture. "Ye, gomabseubnida." (Yes, thank you.) I give this girl I just met a look, causing her face to blush crimson again. "I mean thank you."   I like her. ***** Want ***** Chapter Six : Want   • 2011 •   My name is Areum Choi. A girl that's been put on track for a future she didn't ask for.         "Areum, are you coming?" A spur of the moment decision has been set in motion, from the cogs turning in my head. The sea of faces, and of one day doctors dodge me perfectly and flood into another lecture hall. Hyuri waits patiently for me to follow her and everyone else. This isn't what I want anymore. From birth Areum Choi was sent and trained to become a doctor of an East Asian country without wasting time to ask her what she wanted. But it has to be, or everything was for nothing and I fail. I fail before I start. How could I call my parents and tell them that? "I won't." All I see from her, possibly ever again is a confused glance and of wonder. One of 'what the hell does she think she's doing?' And lastly a hushed, "Eomeona." (Gosh, this girl./ She's crazy./ Oh my goodness.) - showing fondness And then I just turn around... And I walk right out. "Annyeonghaseyo. Areum? You're in a class at this hour." Yoongi's voice floods my ears, as I walk out of the building; getting hit with cold wind after cold wind. An involuntary sniffle follows my cracked voice, "Can you come pick me up?" I hear him, literally, drop whatever he's doing from my end. "Be there in second. Just stand at the front gates." I do as I'm told, shivering but not complaining. People are passing me and giving me what the fuck looks. I'd be that one girl who freaked out on the first day and decided to skip classes. I'll just blame in on my gay teacher. Yoongi and I, our friendship, has escalated as far as him running light or maybe not doing the speed limit dead- on when I sound troubled. He's here in less than half an hour from the other side of the city. I don't get into the car (he left his van and rented a regular car for his own safety) immediately, instead I walk around to the drivers side, the right side. "I'm not going back in there." I kiss him on the cheek and get into the car. Without asking any other questions he drives away, leaving the school in the rearview mirror to disappear. "Where to, Doctor?" I look at him and I don't know what crosses my my mind. His ripped jeans hug his legs in a certain way. His black hair is messy like I just woke him up. It creates an attraction that I don't understand. "Let's go to your place." He giggles with a slight hiccup, then starts the car. "Is someone ready for their third kiss?" He asks me this jokingly. I know it's humor but my answer is serious. "Third, fourth, fifth..." He gasps in fake disbelief. "Doctor Choi, look at you being naughty." He begins driving in the direction of his apartment. "Be warned that my place is barely pressentable." I don't answer him back, trying to push away the foreign feeling I'm having for him and return to my usual self. "You wanna grab something to eat first? My roommate might've already blown through my pantry." He keeps his eyes on the road responsibly. "Yeah," I shrug. "After we should head straight to yours though. Don't know what's next, if I'm quitting college." He spots a fast food place and without hesitation, pulls there. "Don't you worry your pretty head. I plan on talking you back into your education by the end of the day." He says casually, and shushing my upcoming protests as he opts to speak into the drive through speaker. The whole conversation is in Korean so I basically just sit here won't what he got me and if he got it without any tomatoes because I hate them. We've become so close that he just knows this about me. Yoongi parks the car under a bridge that doesn't become very active and starts a conversation by forcing me to eat. With the lame excuse "You look like you haven't eaten all day, Missy." "Yeah, but I have. Remember this morning before I left the dorms, you force fed me an omelet." "Yes, because it was in that moment that I learned that Min Areum doesn't like to-mat-oes." He taps my nose for each consonant. I don't look at him, but provide him with a slight smile. "Min Areum doesn't like lots of things." I state this silently. "Does Min Areum... like me?" I see his big and dark eyes grow wider, holding innocence but something tells me it's false. I don't believe that he's got an innocent streak within him, there's just an atmosphere you'd feel if you're around Min Yoongi, that seems like he's trying to not blow up on you for no reason. Like he's just give anything —anything— to scream for absolutely no reason. And people aren't just born like that. "I love you. We're best friends, aren't we?" I say simply. There's a final mixture of emotions for him. Relieved but eventual anguish and an agonizing over-think about my words. It's simple, really, that Min Yoongi is my best friend and that I love him for that, being the only 'best friend' I've ever really had. A slight rain settles against the ever present fog we we're surrounded by. The weather seems to get worse with everyday. "The temperatures here can be harsh, yeah?" I look out the window, realizing we're completely secluded. Not hating it, but I really want to take nap. "Can I kiss you again, Areum?" There's a pinkish tint to his cheeks and it's adorable. He leans closer to me but not necessarily in a way that initiates the meeting of our lips, more so that my eyes are forced to look deeper into his. "I just need to feel it again." His voice is soft on my ears. "What?" I quickly look away out of shyness. The temperature feels like it's rising considerably. I can barely hold a steady breathing pattern at this point. "What do you feel when... we kiss?" His face is leaning in closer to mine. So close that I can smell the smoke on his breath and the gum he was chewing on before I called him. "It felt like you belonged to me. That's what I want." I'm about to ask him exactly what he means by that but before the chance comes he's forcefully gripping the sides of my face and kissing me roughly, only landing on my lips about sixty percent of the time, but Jesus Christ — I don't care. Because if we're being honest here, I want him to belong to me as well.   •| intermission |• The trick to the perfect deception is to make your victim think of you as their savior. Some ray of sunlight in their world of darkness. You need to find a victim that's smart enough to know better, but desperate for your love. •| intermission |•     I don't completely enjoy the fact that Yoongi and I have possibly ruined our friendship. Ive never done it before, but I'm almost sure that kissing your best friend changes things between you. Not always for the best. It's awkward, possibly for me only, his lips clumsily find mine as a target and it's weird. It's so weird. But I love every minute of every time his lips brush over a particularly sensitive spot of my neck. I love how his hands roam over my body as he slowly exposes it. "Tell me if you're not ready." His lips stop just so he can whisper this. I can feel myself sinking into the plush mattress of his bedroom. His pouty lips travel across my neck and chest, leaving behind a trail of open- mouthed kisses and wetness. My skin was so hot at this point that it feels like I'm running a high temperature and I just lay here letting him give me my first everything. "We... should stop." He sits up from his hover over me. I take in his expression, uneasy are worried. "You don't have to." I sound desperate, but I am at this point. Yearning for his feverish kisses against me. "Kiss me." He rapidly shakes his head as if he's trying to get something out of his ears. "I can't, Areum. I'll hurt you." The man that's in front of me is pure art. Swollen lips, and pale skin that's been marked by my lips returning the actions of his, biting and sucking, and sinning. "You could never hurt me." I trust him wholeheartedly and fully. My arms snake around his neck pulling him closer to me and into another kiss. It last for a few seconds before he pushes off of me and stalks away from the bed, his shirtless form disappearing behind a curtain that's being used as a temporary door. He's right in every way though. This isn't how I imagined my first time, and these feelings I have about being with him in that way are desperate. If anything this is just proof that I'll always be able to trust Min Yoongi. He knew what was better for me in this situation. He put me first. He respects me.       I sit up and don't really bother to put back on the clothes that he carelessly and haphazardly tossed off of me. I'm still in my underwear and shirt. He, on the other hand, was down to his boxers. I grab a blanket and follow him into the living room about ten minutes later. He's just sitting with his head in his hands on the couch, and almost looks sorrowful. "I didn't mean to make you feel compelled to do that with me." I wrap the blanket around his practically naked body. "Don't blame yourself. I wanted you too and probably more now." His eyes shift and rake over me, rapidly clouding with lust. "You're not ready for what I was going to do to you." A strike of panic actually hits me. I sit next to him, feeling his warmth radiate off of him, but I'm still shivering. He wraps the blanket around me as well, easing me to sit next to him. I feel his warm skin and it's soft mess against my own, probably ice cold. His arm hugs me close to him and I rest my head on his shoulder as he runs his hand up my thigh soothingly. "I really don't want you to think that's why I'm friends with you. You mean so much more to me than just that. You're... mine." That sounds endearing to someone that doesn't hear him saying this words but for me it came across as possessive. His grip on me tightens causing pain. "I want to wait until you're ready. I can wait for now." His voice is shaky, as if he's getting really worked up. "Okay," I whisper, becoming wary of him. "Areum, do you trust me?" I stare straight ahead, beginning to question things. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to... no he'll get angry if I say or think these things. "Of course, I do" I'm so petrified at this point, I can barely breathe. It felt like you belonged to me. His words from earlier ring in my head. Suddenly they don't seem as endearing. They seem like he meant something else by them. Other things seem off now. How he just popped out of nowhere on the last day of school, or how he coincidentally was moving to South Korea at the same time as me. What the hell was that? It was too convenient. I picture myself calling my parents, them taking me home to safety. Never seeing him again. But I also picture Yoongi giving me a good reason as to why he's acting like he's out of his literal mind right now. Maybe he's just passionate.   "I trust you completely." ***** Doubt ***** There's a little Korean in this one. I didn't type it in Hangul though. It seems like it's easier for people to follow along when it's in English characters. Chapter Seven : Doubt   • 2011 •   My name is Areum Choi. A girl that has a cross between good and bad luck, but no even score between the two.     It's like we never, almost, had sex. He's gone completely back to normal. He was upset the night of, but the morning after was a completely different story. No, this morning he woke me up with excitement over a new drink added to his favorite café (with extra bananas of something or other) and with the statement that I just had to try it or else. So here I am, with my best friend who almost had my virginity last night for dinner, casually sipping banana milk and taking in the aesthetics with him. It's all I really wanted to do here, referring to the country, I just wanted to relax and really have some good experiences. I wanted to spend all my time sitting here, with his much enjoyed company, soaking in the much enjoyed melancholic atmosphere. I spent all of high school working to get here and into a medical university. Now I'm jut wasting my time drinking banana milk. When I call my parents, I'm not going to have anything to tell them in my progress. They're going to be so disappointed in me because of this. It was a waste, because here the fuck I am — dropping out of a elite university. "You know what?" Yoongi lets the straw out of his mouth. "This is our place." He provides me with a subtle, yet extremely gummy smile, and places his hand over mine. His light fingertips sooth over my palm, eliciting a humming noise from me. The relaxed moment is cut short by the approaching of a Korean. A women, in a pants suit, looking vibrantly professed in her own world, and she doesn't examine me long enough to conclude that I am, in fact, not Korean. Not really speaking the fact that I'm not fluent in Korean but, you know, don't assume. "Yongseo na. Mian na neun dangsin ui ileum eul. Yocheong hal su issseubnikka?" (Pardon me. I'm so sorry. Can I ask your name?) she address me in Korean. Her voice comes across as slightly panicked. It's similar to my voice during school, and it does nothing but provide me with war flashbacks. I don't hesitate to look to Yoongi for assistance. He's been my impromptu translator recently, just until I become fluent but that could be some time from now. It's just another downside to my unofficial dropping out of college. The school would've provided me with someone who spoke English very well. When I was twelve, I wanted to speak an Asian language just to have something to show for not living in China. It was almost Korean, but no. My mother thought she'd benefit me by swooping in and telling me to learn Chinese, 'to become more in contact with my culture.' We see how well that shaped my ideals. The two have a conversation in front of me, about me, as if I weren't here. I use my context clues to determine that it is, in fact, a conversation about me. They continue, so far that she's profusely shaking his hand that's when he turns to me to whisper. "She's a talent agent." And that's it before he's speaking to this lady again. She's speaking too fast, that her hair is whipping into her eyes, just to hastily wipe it behind her neck. I examine this woman closely. She's not ugly. Just enough for me to be jealous that she gets to speak to my friend, comfortably, and I don't. I can't even follow along with my excruciating limited amount of Korean. About, no approximately, seven more minutes pass by and she hands him a small card with her contact information on it. I can't help but fake a smile when she reaches out and grabs my hand, graciously shaking it. She says one more thing, in Korean, before waking away from us. This is the only thing I understood from the conversation. You'll never regret this.   •| intermission |• Opportunities present themselves at the best and worst of times. You have to adjust to their schedule. They know what's best. •| intermission |•   "Who the hell was she?" Yoongi ignores me, while closely examining the card. "She's a talent agent." He mumbles, still paying more attention to the piece of paper than me. "She saw you from," He motions around him as if to suggest a table but halfheartedly. "Anyway, she thinks you're pretty. That's an understatement. She wants you to swing by an audition later." He says this in a monotone and passes me the business card. It's futile, every word is in Hangul. "Did you tell her that I'm Chinese?" I face Yoongi's bad attitude skeptically. "No, but it became obvious after I translated for you." He looks away, and out of the window. My thoughts wander back to the first time we were in this place, the types of people that caught his attention and it fully sickens me. It's a good minute, a fucking awkward minute, before either of us say anything. "What's your problem?" I ask harshly. He doesn't reply for awhile. Honestly, he's trying to piss me off. "I don't have a problem." He bores his eyes into mine, and I defiantly return the treatment. "Stop lying." His breath hitches and his head tilts slightly. He doesn't speak up until we're on the sidewalk, following his lead. "What makes you think you have what it takes to be an idol? Just because you're pretty? It's childish for you to even consider it." Yoongi's eyes glaze over with something I've never seen in him before, but it's definitely not a good thing. "Who said I was considering anything?" "You didn't necessarily have to say it. I know that look, and it says that your considering it. Don't be so ignorant, Areum." Who does he think he is? "Are you serious? You can't mistake ignorance for hopefulness." I never said anything about actually going to the audition but looking at the card, I continue to think. I dropped out of college. I have no money at all. I'm depending on a stranger, whom I think I can just call my best friend without knowing who he was before we met. And I still have to tell my parents about all of the bullshit I've subjected myself to foolishly. "I can mistake your so-called hopefulness for the obvious stupidity." I stop walking but he doesn't. I don't think he's acting like this maliciously. He doesn't stop walking away from me, he knows I'm not following behind him but all Min Yoongi does is stuff his hands in his pocket and leaves me alone. "You'll regret not believing in me." I say just loud enough for him to hear me, but he clearly doesn't give a damn. That's not what friends do to each other.         I don't hesitate to pull out my phone and use the map app, searching for the building that says 에스엠 엔터테인먼트 (SM Entertainment). I have to be have to trust that I'm talented enough for this. I enter the lobby, elegant and chic. Not one surface that isn't white or clear and clean and perfect, this is worth it. The sacrifice, that I made not even an hour ago. "Yah, dangsin-i waseo. naneun nega al-ass-eo!" (Hey, you came. I knew you would!)The same woman from earlier walks up to me speaking Korean again. She looks at me expectantly for a response before she remembers that I'm not a native. "Yah! Kim Hyuri. Yeogiwa. Igeos-eun uliui gajang saeloun yeonsusaeng- i doel geos-ibnida. Geunyeoneun hangug-eoe neungtonghaji anh-eumeulo dongbanjagadoeeoyahabnida." (Hey! Kim Hyuri. Come here. This is going to be our newest trainee. She's not fluent in Korean, so I need you to be her companion.) "Okay!" A mousy brunette leaves a group of others like her. My recruiter gives me a chaste handshake before —in English— whispering a welcome and a good luck to me, then she's gone. "China?" The girl called Kim Hyuri asks me, and suddenly I remember. My first, and now only, friend I've met. I suddenly feel self-conscious about my surroundings. All of these beautiful Korean women, and they're talented, more talented than I could ever aspire to be. This is futile for me. It was stupid of me to make this decision on a whim simply because of Min Yoongi. That's all I've been doing since I met him. Deciding to ditch graduation and fly here ahead of schedule, not saying goodbye to my parents, quitting college, almost having my first time with him, and now... this. I'm at an idol audition. It's his fault that I'm about to make a giant fool of myself. I've never in my life danced one step or picked up a microphone. "This is what you stopped going to college for?" Hyuri walks me into a more secluded area marked '공식 연수생ㅅ.' I don't recognize it immediately but I do the one across from it marked, '외국 오디션' and it makes sense. "Doesn't that second sign say... foreign audition? I'm not sure what this one says but I fit that description best." I point over to the section's label, double checking to make sure I translated it my head right. She takes a second to register my English. "Ah, Cheong So-min-unnie has you categorized as a full trainee. You're not auditioning for anything." She says curtly, with a hint of jealousy. I'm confused. The long line of native auditionees have numbers printed on their torsos. I glance over to Hyuri and see that she's number 708 in place. The current audition is at 300-310. Each audition is only a few minutes long, but she's going to be here for awhile. "I think she said that she'll meet with you once the auditions are all completed. Scratch that. We're going to be here for awhile. "Why do you think I'm not having to audition?"  I ask, but I know the chances of her actually knowing are slim to none. "She thinks, just based on your appearance, that you have potential. Even if you're not at the same level of experience as most girls here," Hyuri motions to the long line that she's going to return to any moment know. "That she can turn you into a big deal." That doesn't make any sense. I was nobody coming into the world. I'll be nobody going out. It's obvious, just take a look at my messed up life.   "She's going to make you famous. Just wait and see." ***** Year ***** Chapter Eight : Year • 2013 •   My name is Areum Choi. I work hard for everything I have. Now I'll work just as hard for something I never dreamed of wanting.         If you ever want to amount to something, do as you're fucking told. After these words followed cruelty. I think I earned this after I fell down during dance practice. No, I was pushed but told to keep that a secret. The truth that I'm nothing more to them but a face for them to distort. I'm clay; they're the hands that mold me into their desired shape and there's nothing I can do about that. Quitting is not an option. It's been two years. I actually just got told I'm that I'm ready. To an outsider that sounds like 'You're ready to debut. Congratulations.' To me, it sounds like I haven't wasted two years of my life. I haven't destroyed my relationship with my family. I haven't lost every friend I made, and made new friends as if they were replaceable. I haven't intentionally deteriorated my health. Not for nothing. These little tragedies... were not done in vain. They seem more worth it to an insider but to an outsider they're heartless. I really have my manager to thank. Mrs. Cheong So-min turned me into what I am today. She practically raised me from a little doctor-want-to-be to a highly respected idol. Two years —which is less than standard for a trainee but no ones bragging here— and I watched herself destroy herself training me, and trying to give me the same stats as her. She succeeded. "She looks peaceful," I whisper to the person next to me, it mattering who they are or were to the dead woman. This woman became my mother. She taught me everything, she discovered me when I was feeling lost; questioning my worth. Feeling hurt was out of the question; being the one that hurt others was not. Whatever it takes to get to the top, and I'll have no regrets over it. She didn't die with any. I look around at her mourners. It's a dark day, and they're showing it through they're attire. We're here to respect her life, and acknowledge that it's over. I'm here, only because of her. I inhale. "Well, that's enough." I shove my hands into the pocket of my black trench coat, the only winter coat I own and all it does is make me look suspicious. I don't allow myself to indulge a minute longer and bid my final goodbye to my manager. Then I walk out of her funeral and into the constant rain and fog and disgustingly chilly weather. There's not much to do, that I would want to anyway due to the whole company being at the funeral. I guess you could call it a day off but with me there's no such thing or rather no such luck. Don't be one of those people that look at an idol in performance and say, 'I can do that.' Because —news flash— you can't. Idol life brings a whole new meaning to its not as easy as it looks. I haven't had a break since he and I quit talking. Well my mind hasn't, everything seems to remind me of him. Even things that don't typically remind you of men. I keep thinking about how abrupt it was; our ending. Neither of us clearly saw it coming. I know it's been two years and to be thinking of this is considered obsessive; I'm not it's just mind-numbing. I only ever think about him, or allow myself to think of him, in a complete state of solitude. Each lone thought of the beautiful stranger whom I trusted does nothing but result in a constant pool involuntary of tears. It's not that I'm particularly still hurting over the loss of a personal friend but I'm indifferent. Should I be grateful that fate worked out in the favor of me never seeing him again. He showed definite signs of mental sickness. Maybe I dodged a bullet. Every time I have that thought, that losing him wasn't a bad thing, I shake it away. "What are you doing here, pabo?" There's a tiny voice that asks from behind me. A set of hands comes to rest on either side of my shoulders on the revolving chair that I've taken the liberty to lounge in, spinning my worries away. The slightly younger version of me sits across from me but isn't wearing the shining smile that normally adorns her pale features. It's the mood that will most certainly surround the atmosphere of SM Entertainment. This is the vibe for months to come. Everyone will be in mourning, not because the took liking to the executive manager and top talent agent of the company, but simply because that's what they think is expected of them. To be upset over the loss. In truth, no one liked the woman. They pretended because she signed a few paychecks, but when she left whispers broke out about her attitude or how 'this bitch really thinks she owns the building or something' other ridiculous and generic slurs follow on a repetitive loop that I wish didn't exist. I'm might've been the only one that truly cared for her, but it's probably because I'm the only one that saw the real her. I saw who she really was. It's her own fault for living like that though. She was the type of person that never let anyone in unless she had no other choice. I quite remember having to beg her for it, for that one chance and opportunity to be a part of her life. She was so hesitant. That's how I knew I could trust So-min Cheong as not only my manager but as my friend. "Don't let what happened to her ruin you. It wasn't your fault, Min." Hyuri rests her hand on my knee to relax me, but she's been trying since we got the news of how she died. It was so gruesome and tragic that I can't consider bringing myself to recount it. "We saw it." And now we can't unsee it. "I've never even seen that much blood in my life." She doesn't keep trying, finding out that it was useless from the beginning of this chain. As if she could speak with dignity on this subject, I remember how she lost her stomach when we walked in on the scene. I guess I lost mine when it really sunk in, hours later. And the other girls... they're weaker than I am. So-min put us together to be a girl group of eight but after we saw what happened, I think it was too much for them because they left the day after. Some went back home, some I haven't been able to contact. Hyuri wasn't even strong enough to deal with what happened to So-min. I had to talk her into staying with me. I had to help her through the tragedy while pretending that I wasn't phased. She was dead, but I was dying.   •| intermission |• Once upon a time there was a guy. He played the good guy and he played it well. So well that people were honestly tricked into loving him and made to trust him. It's written somewhere that he'll get what's coming to him, playing this game. Karmic retribution works both ways.   •| intermission |•   "Y'know we only have fourteen hours to find six more trainees. And then another two weeks to train them for debut." Hyuri reminds me of the responsibility that So-min died with. "Just pull them from the pool of trainees." This company has thousands of them, with a steady number growing every ten fucking seconds. "I feel like we should do this together and be personal towards them, but you're the leader. It's your decision." She shrugs. "Just let me know what you want to do." She's still trying to push me into auditioning them like their children or something. She's not right. An audition is something for the higher-ups to do. Hyuri doesn't understand that it's not our problem. "Pull. Them. From. The. Pool. Of. Trainees." I don't say this to be cruel, but I hear how harsh my tone is. Little Hyuri can't handle people being harsh towards her but instead of doing the right thing and apologizing, I just walk out of the room and into the empty hallways. Reporters are shadowing a anything out leaving, trying to get a shot of someone —doesn't matter who— crying or having a meltdown of some sort. I pull my hoodie over and make my way out of the lobby and into the elevator. The throw flashes from their cameras at me relentlessly. All I hear before the elevator door shuts is another crackling of lightning and shouts asking whoever I am, to come make a comment about the death in our company. "Fuck," I look away not being able to hold myself together anymore. I have one floor to go down until I'm in the parking garage. I'm almost there. Keep it together. I unlock my car and slam door on my way inside. I no longer feel the overwhelming urge to cry no matter how well I've been holding it in. My finger flicks the dial turning on some random station and not really giving a damn about what it lands on. It's when I gradually slow to a stop light that a familiar voice assaults my ears. "I want a- big house, with big cars and big rings..." "What the fuck?" I whisper to no one. I've heard this voice before.   But I can't match it to any particular face.         I tell myself that I'm going to do some googling when I get home, find out who the rapper is in the new song 'No More Dream.' But Hyuri calls and asks to come over with the girls she chose for debut. "I'm not even close to being in the mood for meeting new people." "You never are. Min? You there? Whatever it doesn't matter, I'm coming over because I went with a different approach and you're going to want to know about it. Bye." She hangs up in my face and I take it upon myself to get dressed, since apparently I'm having company over. The doorbell sounds as I'm finishing up my makeup. Yes, I have to wear makeup when people I don't know come over to my house. I understand that it makes me sound insecure but I really just care about my image as a celebrity. It would really be a waste if I worked this hard only to have it be ruined but six total strangers that are coming into my house without permission. My heels click clack against the newly refurbished floors. It's funny, thinking about my lifestyle. I'm not even famous right now, not well known to any population, yet I live like I am one with the checks I get bi-monthly, simply because I'm signed to a label as big as SM. Even before I open the fucking door, Hyuri is scrambling to reassure me that she made a mistake but it supposedly works out for the better. I'm hardly even listening to her babbling. I strictly hold an open-palmed hand to her, signal for her to shut up. She obliges, remember that I'm the dominant out of the two of us despite the age difference that leaves me younger than her but two years and however many months. It's not that I'm intentionally a bitch, when she continues her ranting but I yell for her to be quiet before I kick her out of my fucking house. I look behind her as nothing but two other girls trail behind her, pretty or whatever but not up to my standards. Let's say for arguments sake that they look very predebut, and not in a positive tense. They look like they won't be easily fixed, like they wouldn't care either way or as if they've never worn makeup. To put it, finally and honestly... "They need work," I say not even letting them introduce themselves. Hyuri looks at me expectantly, waiting for me to say something else whether it's good or bad. I look at the two again, not even asking why they're two of we're supposed to be an eight member group. I gauge my opinion quickly, not really having to think about it. A regrettable opinion is already formed, and I can't help but think Somin would be one hundred percent against it.   "But they can be fixed." ***** Chance ***** So I'm gonna stop writing out the Korean words even though they seemed helpful to some people. I know the translations made the story seem more authentic but I don't have the patience anymore. Everything is in English.       Chapter Nine : Chance • 2013 •   My name is Areum Choi. I do my best in everything. That's the way I was taught. I was never taught to deal with grief, the greatest grief I'll every experience and with no one there to ease my pain.       "I'm tired. Go home." I grab my water bottle and sling my long pony tail from my face. The dance studio connected to my house isn't good enough to teach trainees that have only been four months into it but the fact that it's inadequate doesn't stop us for a second. I took some time to not be a bitch and bothered to learned their names. Well not they're names, more like the stage names we had for the rest of the group before they quit. They chose my least favorite two, go figure. It's not about that and I know it. I'm going to have to let the three girls in and stop hating life. If I want this work to be payed off. "Thanks so much for giving us a chance." QT beams like the cutie she is. "If you hadn't we would've been trainees for about two more years." They're really thank Hyuri for this because I wouldn't have even met these girls without her and it's just as well. The longer I know then the better a musical duo sounds better than an actual girl group. These are their stage names, QT and Saylor, but I can't find it in myself to learn their real names and become attached to them. That's exactly what I did with  the others. If they don't stay with us (most likely won't because of my strictness, then I won't bother to learn them. "Maybe more." Saylor, the jellybean adds on. So you think you're exempt from those extra years? Why should these two be the only ones that didn't have endure the hell? Hyuri got sent on a mission to pick the best ones, but she failed. QT and Saylor aren't good enough. "Well, I'm sure Min is going to still expect you to train just as hard as we did." Hyuri giggles trying to break some tension. She can clearly tell that I'm getting pissed. "Yeah, you'll wish for death." I mean it but I say it in a joking manner. "Anyway, I'm heading out for the night. Tomorrow around ten AM, we'll meet at the dance studio on the third floor, last one. Don't any of you dare to be late." And with that, my reputation and their opinion of me is that member that pushes too hard. But I've lost the ability to give any damns. "Hey, Min. Get some rest tonight." Hyuri stops in the doorway after ushering the other shy girls out of the house. "I know you haven't been sleeping too well after the incident." And by 'too well' she means 'not at all.' "I'll try." I hand her this empty promise before I close my front door, locking it twice. My mind is still on the song I heard earlier. I can't be bothered to linger on any other subject right now. That rapper, I swear I've heard his voice before. It was strong, with a hint of being sultry but overall familiar to my ears. There's no way to describe what I'd heard. It was like sex to my ears. I couldn't even concentrate on translating the words to my native language in my head. It was like the guy's voice captivated my every thought. Took control of my every thought, and if the thought wasn't on him it wasn't allowed to stay in my head. "That's it." I whisper to no one. I almost grab my keys, but realize that it defeats the purpose of going for a walk. Instead I leave everything, the only exception being my phone, and walk through my door without a destination in mind at all. It isn't a long before I can hear the faint thumping of EDM, and nothing else. Now I've never been the clubbing type, but due to recent events I've found that it's painfully easy to get lost in a bottle of something and drown your problems in its contents. That's exactly what I do every other day and feel no regret. I've kept this habit a moderate secret. When I do drink, I'm safe. I don't drive there, just choose one bar within walking distance. I've never made the horrific mistake of drunkenly sleep with a stranger either. Instead of waiting in line, I waltz my way to the front without even thinking about it. People, those who have been waiting in the cold and probably for hours gripe at me and yell, clearly jealous. I have status in Seoul now, a difference from when I first arrived. "I'm important," I flash the bouncer my I.D, and he lets me through the velvet ropes without questioning me. As often as I come to a club I've happened upon, I quickly developed a routine. Every club is the same, permeated with the stench of sex and dancing and alcohol. I can't get enough of the energy and the vibes, the fact that I can barely hear myself. It's surreal, truly it is. Every club here is like this, full of girls that look and act the same and guys that can't seem to get enough of them. They're sluts, but no one can be judged in this scene. I make my way over to the bar, having to scream at the bartender that I want a vodka soda and my accent makes it even tougher to understand. That and my poor skills in East Asian languages. I turn in the neon swivel chair and face the crowd, drawing a few stares from hungry eyes. It seems to be more attractive to be a girl that's simply dressed here, not wearing thread bare bullshit. Not that I'm completely covered like the virgin I am, I'm still wearing my white jean shorts and a see through top. As you saw before, it was a snap decision to go for a walk. The song shifts but you can't even tell, due to the screams and boarderline moans. "Hey," An onlooker gains the ability to finally approach me, despite my intimidating stance and the intentional look I hold in my eyes. "Where did you clearly just come from? Most girls don't wear this to a club." I'm offended but don't show that. "What makes you think I'm like most girls?" I almost bring up a stale argument that 'this is America and I wear whatever I want.' But I stop myself before I sound like the example of idiot, because I'm not in America anymore. "Nothing if I can be honest," He continues this futile attempt at flirting with me. "But maybe that's not a bad thing. You should tell me your name." I look away from him, a good move, and twirl the straw in my mouth seductively. After awhile, you become great at this sort of thing. "I'll tell you mine, if you tell me yours." He barters weakly. His eyes hold a pure innocence, but I've seen that before. It's not candor, no he's something else, but I can't place it. His tanned skin glistens, which tells me nothing but he's been dancing all night (most likely around whores) and this definitely isn't his first time using these lines on a girl that was literally just minding her own business. His hand comes up to brush a strand of hair out of his deep brown eyes and he gives me this smile like 'sleep with me, I'm cute.' I still don't answer him, but I'm not hating his company although I can barely hear him over the blaring music, a hit song from last year. "Okay, I'm getting nowhere. Instead of names let's try something else." His hand ends up on my thigh. "I'll call you princess, and you can call me daddy." I choke on my drink and go into a coughing fit. The guy reaches out to assist me but I hold my arm out to stop him from touching me anymore. "Seriously what the hell is your name?" I ask after I'm finished dying in my seat. He chuckles and grabs my hand, leading me into the hallway where the bathrooms are. We close ourselves in a stall of the empty restroom, hearing nothing but the ragged breathes of our own bodies and the extreme (but muffled) music from the next room over. "I'm Park Jimin." His lips cover mine completely and it's like he wants to swallow me.     •| intermission |• Once upon a time, there was a girl that gladly kept her walls up and protected herself from being hurt and soiled. This kept her clean of sin. But the one that's become obsessed with her has other plans. •| intermission |•     The feeling never ceased. You know how it feels. A person of regular sanity feels the urge — has this issue — every month or so. That feeling to kill. It doesn't even necessarily have to be killing for me. I just want to make someone feel the pain, that satisfying pain. I need someone to trust me, only to feel fear that I caused. I look through my glass doors of the twenty third floor in this hotel BigHit put us in for the beginning of our promotions. Like an itch you can't scratch, I have this terrible need to strike terror in this person's heart. I want to play with her, love her, make her trust me, and when she does... When she finally does, I'm going to kill her. I breathe in allowing my thoughts to finally consume me. It's been awhile since I've had time to really think about this. It's finally starting. I set my plan into motion only two days ago and Jimin texted me about in hour ago. My baby is slutty enough to sleep with Park within minutes of knowing him. I'll have to punish her for it later on. I pick up my phone and check the time. It's been an hour since he told me that he successfully got her to his place and is definitely fucking her tonight. I don't know how I feel letting him take her virginity like this, knowing that I'm not her first. My baby was keeping herself pure for me. Keeping herself untouched and waiting with her sweet tight little pussy. The feeling courses my veins again as I wrap my left hand around my cock, slightly squeezing and bothering the tip with my thumb. I groan at the feeling. Thoughts and images of bursting into Jimin's room, two floors down, and entering his bedroom only to find them screwing in his bed circulate. It keeps me hard thinking about seeing their writing bodies, naked and tangled together. Him pounding into her, my muse, and causing her to scream makes me want to mangle Jimin but his voice in the back of my mind reminds me that this whole scheme is mine. I don't care if I'm exposed right now, standing in front of a full length wall of glass at night. I stare down at the city, nothing but lights swimming in a pitch black sea from my angle. "Ugh, fuck." I whisper this as quietly as possible to myself. "Take his cock you little whore." The image of her little pink lips around the circumference of his dick kills me. "Swallow. It. All." He cums straight down her throat. My load bursts from my red tip and paints the window white. I continue jacking myself off, getting small bursts and coming down from my orgasmic high with a moan. The fact that she's finally so close to me fuels me like nothing else but we've discussed her not knowing that Jimin and I are connected until tomorrow or maybe the next day, but definitely not tonight. No matter how badly I want to dip my pocket knife into her perfect pale skin and fuck her so well... "Areum..." I keep moaning, before I tuck my cock back into my boxers. "Min Areum..."   I want her... so badly. ***** High ***** Chapter Ten : High • 2013 •   My name is Areum Choi. I've learned that trying new things isn't always that bad. Yet there's a fine line between taking chances and just being fucking stupid.       "This is creepy." I speak drowsily to the boy who's hand is stroking through my hair, thinking that I'm still asleep. I can feel his eyes boring into my closed eyelids. I open my eyes slowly to find his looking back at me dreamingly. "I'm sorry, you're just so beautiful in the morning." He admits and then removes his hand to get into a lying down position next to me. "You lips are so... pink. You're so..." He trails off but I'm still asleep mentally. His slim fingers end up in the same place they were last night, causing me to choke back a deep groan. "W-what time is it, Jimin?" I close my eyes and throw my head back in pleasure of his quick fingering. "Two in the afternoon, babygirl." He whispers in my ear. I can believe I slept in so late but it felt so good I don't care. "Just enough time for us to get in one more quickie before I go to dance practice with my band mates." He straddles my waist and fondles my unclothed body. The puffy white duvet tangles in our naked bodies and he moans into my neck. He ruts against my leg and growls, giving me pleasure. That same pleasure from last night and I don't stop him no matter my soreness. "You said two in the afternoon?" I ask between kisses, but not actually caring. "Why does that matter baby? It's just the two of us." His hand runs down the curve of my back and between my legs to spread them. His head disappears between the freshly exposed parts of my body. I can't feel anything but his tongue in the most intimate part of my body. I feel like there was something I was supposed to be doing this morning. "How long can you stay? I know you have dance and shit but I like what we've been up to." "I can stay." I decide to blow it off for this. I'm already late anyway and I just lost my virginity. Hyuri will understand. He provides me with a dimpled smile and returns his tongue to its previous place. I bury my hands in his hair and tug lightly, not sure if it hurts. I've never been in this situation before. "Ah, Jiminie..." My head is thrown back. His tongue enters and exists and when I feel myself getting closer I yank his raven locks, not even caring anymore. Just as I'm coming down from my high, there's a slight knock at his bedroom door. I think he mentioned before that he shares this floor with two other members while there is another pair of two. Then there's the lead rapper that requires his own room since he doesn't exactly get along with the other members. He kisses my neck, not knowing if I'd appreciate a kiss on the mouth right now. "The bathroom is on the left, baby. Take a shower and I'll drive you home, yeah?" His eyes concentrate on mine. "Yeah." I get up, not covering my naked self away from him, he who was my first. I want to regret what I did with him last night and this morning but I'm reeling in from an orgasmic high. Everything feels good. My mind won't allow me to hate the decision but it might later, which I dread with my everything. I run my hand under the shower's spray, deeming it warm enough and stepping under it so that I'm being rained on. My hair dampens and starts clinging to my body. I feel my neck with my fingers, remembering the harsh treatment Jimin gave that area of my body. He squeezed so roughly, that I have imprints of five fingers on my neck. I check out the rest of myself. There's slight bruises on my collarbone and dark ones on my hips and thighs. I love it so much. I've never exactly pegged myself as a kinky person or into something like that, but I definitely want him to do that again to me. I want a repeat of the events occurred last night in his bed (and in his car). When I step out of the shower I wrap the plush white towel and take notice of the large mirror, now fogged completely from the heat and stream of the shower. There's a conversation going on in the bedroom, but who am I to listen in? It's none of my business so I scribble my phone number on the fogged mirror and reclothe myself, making sure to tie my hair in a wet (gross) bun. Last night I barely wore anything to keep me warm outside. Just my dance practice clothes are all I have to cover myself with but it works out fine. I'll go straight to Hyuri's and we'll work on the choreography with the others. They can't be too mad at me for bailing out on them despite the emphasis I put in not being late and the big deal I made out of it. Hyuri comes through claiming to be at Jimin's hotel in at least five minutes since he's not far from the dance hall. I send her a smiley face to take the edge off of the chat and ensure she's in good spirits within the next ten minutes. My phone chimes and I already know it's my designated driver. Instead of going through the room's bedroom I opt for the next door over, successfully escaping Jimin and whoever knocked on his door to interrupt his skillful tongue. The brisk air slaps my entire body, forcing me to wish I brought a coat with me. The only cost I own is trench and I definitely could not wear that to a club scene without looking like either a health inspector or a prostitute. "Hey there, naughty girl." She teases. "The walk-of-shame suits you." I scoff. "Shut up, you've done this more than I have." I recount the number of sleepovers Hyuri is guilty of. I can count them on one hand (she's no whore) but it's still more than me, since I only have one. "Fuck you," She laughs, starting into traffic. "So are you going to tell me who this god is that convinced you into finally giving it up? Seriously, you're twenty three years old, Min." "No, but could you stop calling me by my stage name, babe? We're not even debuted yet. It's Areum, not Minmin." I give her an irritated chuckle when the heat finally kicks in and warms me up. "Minmin is cuter. How did you even come up with that?" I remember how, and every second that led to me introducing myself by that name. I remember why down to the exact last detail. "It was so long ago. Barely remember anything." She takes that and doesn't press any further. "Seulgi and Ah-yeong are probably already here." She mumbles. "Who?" I give her a questioning look and ask this in Korean, having become absolutely fluent over my two years living here. "You're a bitch. We spent like four hours with the two yesterday." She pinches my arm playfully and then returns it to the steering wheel. The radio picks up slightly, indicating that the current song is more upbeat and intense. "Have you heard of the new rookie group? Only one of them is actually cute, but I guess they're all good looking." I want a- big house, big cars and big rings but really, I don't have any big dreams— The rapper continues and introduces his name by something that actually strikes a feeling in me. And it scares the living hell out of me. "That's the lead rapper. He's kinda cute. I'll show you the MV when we get to the studio." She winks. "His name is Suga, but his real name in Min Yoongi." She has no idea what this information is doing to me but she continues on in her own idle chat, barely realizing that my whole demeanor is pained. "He's my bias."   •| intermission |• It's at the best times of your life when he's watching you. He's plotting the best way to ruin that melancholy. He wants you to know how much he loves you. He loves you so much that he'd kill. He's waiting for you. He's watching you. Look out the window. He's watching you through the window. •| intermission |•   "Grueling as per usual." QT groans, but I don't bother her for it. My frustration got the best of me, therefore I'm guilty of pushing the girls too hard during practice. It's always easiest to coach dance practice in an emotional state either way, because the work isn't for nothing. You always benefit from it. "Don't like it? You can leave. Practice on your own time." My expression doesn't exactly harden but it doesn't soften. I keep my demeanor of pissed as hell. "Hey, Minnie!" Hyuri calls from her spot, back against the wall mirror and portable computer in her lap, her headphones winding around her throat with their cord becoming more tangled with her every move but she looks so cute I can't help but oblige. "I want you to learn the members of that group we were listening to in the car." Anything but that right now. "I'm tired," I lie, not at all wanting to see Min Yoongi's face. My thoughts and previous feeling are hurting me so much. "I'm gonna go home." Her smile drops a bit. "Oh, okay. You need a ride?" She begins gathering her things, although I know she planned on spending good ten or fifteen minutes in that spot. "No, I'll call someone." I sling my backpack over my shoulder, grabbing my glass water bottle. My phone rings for a few minutes, and I question whether or not he's going to answer. "Hey, can I just say how glad I am that you left your number?" His husky voice assaults my ears. "It hasn't been that long." I hate myself for wearing nothing but shorts right now. The chilly air is too much. "Where are you? I wanna have some fun." He knows what I mean. "Hmm, me too baby. I shouldn't be that far from your studio. We're just dicking around." "I think the debut studio is just around the corner from the trainee studio." I start walking only to confirm that I'm right. "Why is it so fucking hard to keep up with BigHit's buildings?" I ask rhetorically. "I'm so hard." He whines. I hear another voice in the background, reacting to his off-topic and blunt statement. Hyung, what the hell? "My girl is coming over." He reassures the boy. He refers to me as his girl, and I don't really hate it. They have a slight conversation only for me to interrupt them a second later. "What's your code?" I'm at the lounge door. "Hm? Oh, it's Cypher. C-Y-P-H-E-R. Cypher." I punch the letters in according to his direction exactly and the red light turns green. I push the door open with ease, suddenly hoping that there's not many people in the room. "Hey, babe. No fans are allowed in here." A guy sitting at a soundboard takes his headphones off to address me. "How did you get the passcode?" "She's with me, Seokjin-hyung." I see Jimin come literally out of nowhere. He removes his black face mask. "This is Kim Areum." "Choi," I futilely correct him. "Oh yeah, you told me that." He glances at me and wraps his arm around me waist. "She's Chinese, but you can't even tell." The one called Seokjin holds his hand out for my to shake formally and gives me a warm smile. "Get used to seeing her." Jimin whispers. As we're walking through another corridor, Seokjin calls one last thing out before retiring his headphones to the correct spot. "Use a condom, Jimin." He just keeps walking me somewhere else. He grabs my hand and walks me towards the couch area. "That's Jungkook, our little maknae." The small boy, that's resembling a rabbit, holds his hand up but doesn't look away from his xbox. "How many members are there?" I ask curiously. "How many rappers?" He smirks. "Trying to make me jealous already? We've only been together for a day." We stop walking in the hallway where he presses his lips against mine feverishly and without patience. He moans into the kiss as his tall frame backs me against the wall. My hands become trapped by his and they're being held above my head. Jimin's lips travel down my neck, harshly leaving wet sucks scattered. "I wish I could fuck you against this wall properly, but I don't have enough time." I whine and free my wrists from his in order to wrap them completely around his neck, not letting go. "Stay here." I feel like if I let him go I'll lose him to someone better than me. He definitely has options with his appearance and talent. "We can hang out tonight when we get home. Come by our dorms." "I thought you were in motels." I look him in the eyes. "That was temporary. Our dorm isn't far though. We have a permanent building, three bedroom and three bathrooms. I guess now that we're technically famous BigHit wants to start treating us right." His eyes disappear as he grins at me. We're taking the back entrance to avoid his publicity. "I'll see you tonight babygirl." He bends his knees a little so that he's standing on my level. His lips smash against mine passionately. My time with Jimin has been nothing short of amazing, ands it's definitely filling the lack of contact with the opposite sex I've had my whole life. That brief period with Yoongi doesn't count. I don't even know who he is anymore. Jimin's lips violate mine as much as they want since we're alone and in an alley; as private as public kissing gets. He finally pulls away from me and let's go of my hands that were entangled in his. "Come over around ten, okay?" "Alright, I'll see you then." I mumble. Before I can walk away and leave the suspicious alleyway, he stops me. "Here," Jimin wraps his black jacket around me and waits for me to put my arms in the sleeves. "Can't have my baby freezing to death. Get back home safely, and call me when you get there." His lips gives my forehead a caste kiss and then renters their studio. Is this what it's like having a boyfriend? I didn't consider Park Jimin one until our grossly domestic scene just now. My checks heat up and I inhale the sweet scent of his cologne. The walk home can't be called a walk-of-shame, because I won't regret how much I'm falling for him.               "You saw it? I did exactly what you wanted." "Yes, Jiminie you've been a very good boy." His tone bothers me but I don't let it show. "So everything's going well. I eased her into the dating status without an issue. She's so desperate it's not even cute; anyway she'll be at the dorms around ten to get dicked again." I continue according to the plan; the plan that he devised on his own while I simply agreed to it.   "That's where you come in." ***** Consummate ***** There's some fun in this one (18+)   Chapter Eleven : Consummate • 2013 •   My name is Areum Choi. After everything I've worked hard for has been earned, I'd just like to spend some time with someone that is making me happy. That's all I want.       The rain splashing against my window reminds me that I shouldn't continue to make the mistake of dressing for summer again. I opt for something to match the weather but still sexy. Pajamas and rain boots. "No way am I letting you wear that to a hook up. Are you even wearing makeup?" Hyuri, who has become a regular at my house, scoffs from her spot on my bed. "Do I need to wear makeup to have sex?" I ask with sincerity. "Oh, honey." She gets up from her position and walks over to my dresser, beginning to rummage through my underwear. She passes a set of black lace to me. I've only worn these once, when I attempted to lose my virginity and it did not work out well at all. "You'll wear this, with heels and your coat. I'll do your makeup too." She moves to another table in search of my rarely used makeup bag. "What the hell? A trench coat and underwear? You want me to look like a whore." "You're getting dressed to go have sex. You're supposed to look like a whore." She giggles. "And it's not like anyone is going to see you other than him. Speaking of him," She scoffs and then cracks her most mischievous smile. "Do you feel like telling me his name yet" I shake my head, clipping the bra. And she accepts that. I'm not at all ready to admit that I'm hooking up with someone that's debuted a week ago, but I'm also still not ready to even ask him about his music or what his group name is. I don't care. I was nice meeting those two of his members because I'm polite. The end. Hyuri spends the next half an hour (maybe more time) doing the minimal on my face, red lipstick, blush, mascara. That's it, then shut wastes time curling my hair so than it runs it ringlets across my back. She wraps the coat around me ceremoniously. "Good luck wearing this in the taxi," She giggles again, exploiting her dimples for the adorable mounds in her face that they are. "Thanks," I roll my eyes at my friend. I have to tie the belt and tighten the buttons in the car, while avoiding the eye of the driver. "So where is a girl like you going dressed up like that?" He asks, slyly but I'm not having any of this shit. "130 pwangdak. It's the dormitory building owned by BigHit Entertainment." I don't say this with any formality or politeness at all. In this country, I've found that it's not exactly customary to be polite towards strangers that hold insignificant places in your life. He seems to take the hint, and doesn't press the fact that he's hitting on me but unfortunately keeps the conversation going for the last seven or eight minutes of our ride. How great would it be if, in addition to paying for a car ride, we payed for silence? I step out of the car after paying the conversationalist. The rain has died down to a slight drizzle, but more of a mist. My phone screen illuminated the dim lobby, displaying the fact that it's only twenty after ten. The only thing I hear in the elevator and down each hallway is the click-clack of my heals. I was asked not to knock but to just type in the same code as from earlier and let myself in. Just like before Jimin is sharing this form with his band mates and I think there are about seven or eight of them. In addition to just not having a full floor they share one form, with their own rooms. I'm so afraid of getting attacked right now. What would you do if someone broke into your house in the middle of the night in the fucking dark? I check each door first (only having to check the first three) until I'm in front of the one that says 'JM' then I, as quietly, as possible open the door and step inside. There's a male figure lying shirtless on the bed, the blankets have been pushed aside. He doesn't move until he hears the click of the door and he knows it's me. But it's completely dark in this room. He sits up, swings his legs over the edge of the bed and pats his lap expectantly. I don't ignore him and willingly straddle his thighs. They seem less muscular than the last time I was sitting here. He seems hesitant to be here. I don't want him to feel obligated or anything. "Jimin-ah, we don't have to do this..." Jimin shushes me and stays silent. His lips wander across my skin, taking in the fact that I'm not wearing clothes. He hums at the fact that I'm only wearing underwear and a coat. I feel his erection poking me through his briefs. He moans into my neck, slightly tugging my hair. I wrap my arms around his neck, allowing him to pull me closer yet he still says nothing. The last time (my first time) we did this he was absolutely gentle and Jimin is a vocal lover. Now he's completely silent and rough. It's a welcome contrast though and I don't hate it. His hands are on my hips getting me impossibly closer. One particularly harsh suck on my collarbone coaxes a groan out of me. "Fuck," My breathes are becoming ragged. "Jimin." He flips our positions until I'm on my back beneath him with his lips attacking my exposed skin, leaving purple bruises in their wake. Jimin's fingers toy with the hooks of my bra after throwing my coat off, not caring that it's sprawled on the ground. He shifts me and places my head on the foot of the bed, kissing my nipples and gently tugging them with his teeth. I moan his name continuously, like a mantra. My hands —my fingernails— cut crescents in his back, marking him completely. "Jimin." I whine again, more high-pitched. My hands fumble to tug his briefs at the waistband, groping what's been revealed. He doesn't even bother unstrapping my heels, which just makes this that much more hotter. I'm feeling too much pleasure to ask him why he's so silent. I wrap my legs around his waist and flip our positions again, and he places his hands on my hips encouragingly. Jimin falls onto his back, lifting my hips just enough so that I can ease his tip into me. "No condom?" Instead of answering me, he just begins bucking his hips, nailing me. "J- Jimin..." I throw my head back in exasperation. He groans but seems to try to keep himself quiet. When his hips get tired, I leave my hands on his chest to steady myself and use my legs to rise up and down atop his throbbing cock. "Fuck, fuck, fuck," I squeeze my eyes shut, feeling a thin film of sweat start to form on my forehead. His hips move to meet mine and we're moving in sync, and I swear it's art. It's fucking art. I can't even see him but this feeling. When it stops I'll miss it. This feeling that only he has given me and in this moment. Small mewls exit my mouth and he does the same, less vocally than the last time. I feel my orgasm creeping up on me like a stalker, a very welcomed stalker because I come down my  high with a slight scream of pleasure. I feel him release himself inside of me, reminding me how thankful I am for the birth control I started at the beginning of the year. I lean down to press my lips against his gently, tasting him and fucking loving it. I fall over onto my side of his king-sized bed, and let my exhaustion drive me into a fitful sleep.     •| intermission |• Foolishly, she's completely desperate for the feeling she deprived herself of as a teenager. She wants that pleasure, and she'll get it from whoever is willingly to do it laced with love. But he has needs as well. •| intermission |•     I finally get out of bed and turn on the lights, to examine the naked girl in Jimin's bed. She's perfect. I spread her legs by the thighs and push my head between them for a quick taste. Brushing my tongue against her clit and sucking harshly, savoring her sweet taste. My palms roam the expanse of her chest to get the feel of it. I've waited so long. I've. Waited. So. Long. I've waited so long... to finally claim her as mine. She's mine. No one else can love her the way I do. The way I did tonight. Who else is going to fuck her the way I did? She fucking loved every minute of having my thick cock shoved into her. That little fucking slut. This is my property. I-I can't believe I let Jimin —that Jimin— touch her. He's unworthy! I start to violently tug my hair. Trying to get the... the bad thoughts to go away. The bad thoughts.... not now. I'm pulling so hard, it's actually painful. I love this. Finally being able to let this violent side of me out, my mind needs that release. Like he could ever appreciate the gift that she is. I kiss up to her neck, knowing that she's fully asleep. I reach over to Jimin's nightstand and take the previously hidden blade. It's so light in my hand and deadly and I fucking love it. I love this feeling of 'I could kill her right now if I wanted to.' It's such an addicting thing, really it is. I allow the cool metal to slide against her naked flesh slowly as if to not wake her up to find me in my naked state with a knife. My member is fully erected at the sight of this helpless little girl, this stupid stupid girl. How can see not see what I really am? And how much I fucking love her?! I'd kill someone if she asked me to! She's has absolute power over me and I don't care! I just need her. I feel the urge to stab her repeatedly, painting her red with beautiful crimson strips. I know it's wrong. I know it's wrong. I know it's wrong. I know it's wrong. I have to stop myself. "Not yet. Soon, but not yet." So I don't. Instead I put the knife away like a good boy and palm my fully erected shaft in anticipation, bothering the slit with my thumb and suppressing a groan of pleasure. I keep my position hovering over the naked girl, and just stare at her. She dressed herself for this tonight just for me. She came here for this. She wants this. She needs this. She needs me. At this point I'm fully stroking myself above her, nearing my peak of complete pleasure. "Areum..." This I do my best to simply whisper, but it's difficult to suppress such love for someone while their unconscious. My cum splashes onto her naked torso. It's all over her, and she's never looked prettier. My cum-covered index finger moves to enter her pretty little mouth, risky because I'm surprised she's not awake yet. Her mouth doesn't close around my semen-doused digits the way I want it to but she can taste me. "This is the only person you'll ever taste in your life. Get used to my cum in your mouth, Min Areum." I whisper in her ear, not caring if this wakes her up. I take as much time as possible to admire this vision in front of me and I got to fuck it tonight. And I'm the only one that's going to do that for the rest of Areum's life. ***** Corrupt ***** Chapter Twelve : Corrupt • 2017 •   My name is Areum Choi. As time passes, secrets are revealed but some secrets... should fucking stay hidden.       There was a point in my life, not too terribly long ago, that my manager was murdered. Hyuri and I walked into her house that afternoon, to find her a bloody mass of brutally stabbed flesh. Oh god, the vomit. I was sick for days (weeks) after that. Every time I pictured her corpse like that, in pieces. In pieces. You see, you always hear about things like that happening to unsuspecting victims and you feel sorry for them but you're cruel. You brush it off, not even thinking about the people that discovered the body like that, naked and torn apart. You don't think about those that cared about that. My manager was murdered. She was mutilated and then tossed in the ground by people that used to bully her at work. And they're fucking adults. Maybe it should've been one of them. I remember thinking like that the day after the funeral when they all returned to business as usual without a tear shed. Maybe it would've been better if one of these people got violated like So-Min did. I have to shake that type of thought away because I'm terrified of it. If I could easily let a feeling like that in, then I'm no better than the sick bastard that committed the crime. This, by chance, incident has completely changed me, and not for the better. I hate everything. Anything that I enjoyed the day of this is soiled. Tainted by that gruesome memory. I regret every decision that I made that led up to that moment. "Babe, you alright?" He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me towards him, letting himself burry himself in my neck to inhale my hair. I don't answer. He's gotten used to my stoic exterior and how I can seem like I'm contemplating suicide. We talked about this, quite a few times now that I'm recounting them. It's not a big deal for me anymore when I feel like jumping off of something that will be fatal. "Don't think yourself into a bad mood." He whines. I love this about him. I've been dating him for almost five years. "Jagi, it's our anniversary." He brushes his hand through his blonde locks, a bad habit that I've picked up on and come to love. "Yes, and we can't even spend it outside." I'm a rookie idol currently. My debut date was exactly nineteen days ago and when I say the press is after me I fucking mean it. I had to push the debut date back for a third time last year due to... certain circumstances of meeting the boys Jimin debuted with. They've been driving me insane everyday to this point where I don't even feel like it was worth it, the literal hell I went through for this fame. "Who says we can't?" I flop onto the bed next to him and whine a bit, feeling better and craving his attention. "Seriously, Jagiya. They don't own you. If I want to take my girlfriend out on our fifth anniversary then fuck them. Get dressed," He kisses my lips briefly before walking into his side of our shared walk-in closet. Jimin is as successful as it gets. I don't think there's another level for him to accomplish at this point honestly. With his group that I've been watching for the entirety of his career. BTS has been interview, and invited and loved by everyone. Who else could they cross of the list of VIPs? No one because they've conquered it all. "I'm not joking, Areum." He calls with a slight edge in his voice. "Or do I have to punish you?" Then it's not a game anymore, because not only is this closet full of clothes but it's full of Jimin's dominant toys. Looking at him you'd never peg him for a freak but that's the deceptive point in him. He's confusing and it was like walking labyrinth blindfolded to get to know him. I get up and do as he says, turning the corner and into the basically full sized room designated just for our over-priced clothing. I don't expect to find my boyfriend in the closet stark naked and holding a belt but that's exactly where I find him. "I told you I meant business." I think he recalls the circumstances (it's an anniversary and I'm upset) because he puts away the belt and starts shifting through he racks upon racks of Gucci. It's funny because in the four years we've been 'together' we haven't been free enough to do it again. We've only really had penetrative sex on our anniversaries. It's not like it was that exciting anyway because Jimin always asks for the lights off and then he's completely silent during the whole thing. Of course, I'm suspicious of it but I can't start any issues now that I'm being watched. I worked through too much to get to this point in my career. Depression after the death of Somin, the episodes of panic I'd suffer through when he reentered my life but Min Yoongi has proved to be no threat and has become quite a close friend to me once again. My thoughts cease when I realize I'm thinking myself into a mood again. "Where are we going?" I whisper like a mouse. He chuckles sickly but doesn't make eye contact with me at all but more with his clothes. "Wouldn't you like to know? I bet it's tearing you apart, knowing how crazy you get about things like this," He tests my patience with ease and he knows the only he can get away with bullshit like this. "Just don't dress formal. Casual as you can, princess. Take all the time you need." He finds the simplest outfit he owns and takes my cheek, still naked, and kisses me softly before leaving the room. He closes the sliding door behind him, giving me absolute privacy. It's not even that difficult. Jimin likes to anticipate things. Things that don't even have value and I'm not surprised that he's doing it now. He gets his hopes up, then turns to me expectantly to make him feel better. This is something that I feel is more of a disorder but it's not like I know much about health. Ironic coming from a doctor wannabe, right? I settle on a really boho look but it's still chic enough to be worn in the place that I live.   This was never the type of thing that I considered important but summer in Seoul is the most important. You only get caught in pajama pants and a hoodie before you learn that lesson. I'm going to get my picture taken about a billion times out here today and it's hot, and I'm just out of the fucking mood. "Ready?" He's dressed himself in casual cutoff jeans and a stripped shirt. A straw fedora rests over his currently white blond hair. When BTS' promotions send they'll be able to dye their hair neck to their natural colors or to whatever they want. I can't help but let my thoughts wander to the one who's hair is currently a bright blue. The way I've been crammed into his life but the fact that we have barely spoken a full conversation to each other irritate me like nothing else. I consider him my friend still to this day. I've known him for seven years. Although we don't speak as often as I'd like us to, he's still there when I actually need him to be. Right before our debut when I needed to fit in some extra dance practice. Jimin found an excuse to not be there, Yoongi didn't and gladly helped me out. Last year when Jimin and I got into a fight that lasted about a month (over our nonexistent sex life) Yoongi let me cry into his hoodie and rant and scream as much as I wanted before I realized that it was a stupid reason to fight with Jimin. Things are always a little edgy with our relationship but it's unspoken. Honestly it pains me sometimes. He grabs my hand with a little smile, small but his eyes still disappear. "Don't be afraid of them. Remember what I said, Areum? They don't control you. They don't control us." I understand exactly what he's saying, but it's not true.   Not for me it isn't.   •| intermission |• Don't assume things are going well, if they haven't been for awhile now. You're nothing but destined to wear a mask all of your life. Don't shed a tear now. You wanted this. You're not allowed to regret it. •| intermission |•   The sun is beating down on me like I owe it money. Seoul is hell at the moment but it's to be expected. It's that time of the year. "You want to stop for something to drink?" Jimin beans and looks at me through his dark-framed sunglasses. His chubby cheeks and dyed blonde hair remind me of how much I absolutely adore this boy. Sometimes I can barely remember that he's a grown ass man, because he seems so child-like all the time. "Sure," Then there's me. Ever since the Somin (almost seven years ago) incident I haven't been at my typical personality. Words I would use to describe my past self would be things generic shit like timid and bubbly. They do not suit me now (unless I'm acting, therefore getting paid to act like that) but my actual persona fits better with absolutely and completely beaten by fate. I'm more sullen and it's not necessarily me doing it intentionally. Everything happens according to fate. I've talked (cried) to Jimin about this countless times and he seems to understand me well enough. There are few actual problems in our relationship, besides our nonexistent sex life. It's what we hear about our relationship every time we leave the house together. Why are they together? They don't suit each other at all. Sweet Park Jimin doesn't fit well with that evil bitch. She never smiles but he always is. I think Oppa would fit so much better with a different female idol. Then they smile at me. They're so damn fake. Everyone is so fake. It's like an instant replay in my fucking head! Everyone's got a god damn opinion! That's another point in which the thoughts came back. The thoughts of how much easier it would be if I simply... killed them. It doesn't seem like something I would normally think. These are thoughts that have clearly been provoked by someone on the outskirts of my life. I wish more than anything that I could figure out who. There's a sudden warmth on my hand (it's his) and it snaps me out of my thoughts. "Baby girl, you okay?" He asks concerned. He knows my answer but he still asks anyway. I'm never okay. "Yep," I smile. But no one is faker than I am. ***** Mental ***** Chapter Thirteen : Mental • 2017 •   My name is Min Yoongi. I'm currently holding a knife.     "I want you... to take her out today. She still thinks today is your anniversary of meeting, right?" "Yes, hyung." He's bold enough to take seat next to me on the bed, but I'm more naked than he is. "Hyung do you want me to screw her tonight?" They're only allowed to fuck once a year. This is according to my rules. I'm too smart to think that Jimin would follow through on my plan this long if there wasn't anything in it for him. He gets to have sex with my Areum... my... mine. Mine! She's mine! He can't touch her. I love her. I need her! Mine! She's... "No." A shocked expression takes his face. I can already hear his next sentence. Hyung! I've been waiting so long! I've been such a good boy! Before he says it, gets the chance to, I raise my hand and throw the small throwing knife with minimal effort and the right amount of force. It's sticks out of the wall across from us. "Okay, Jiminie. I'll tell you what. If you do as I say tonight, I'll suck your cock. Better yet. I'll let you fuck my face to your hearts content. You can fuck me too, whatever you want, only if you do whatever the fuck I tell you. Got it?" He ponders my proposal while I make sure it's worth it. I don't want Jimin getting any wrong ideas. I want Areum Choi. If it came down to it I'd kill him. I'd kill... anyone that got in the way of my angel. I think I've proved that quite nicely, although I can count the number I've actually killed for her on one hand. I'll add to the body count if that's what my angel wants. "Yes." He says pouting a bit. "And to ensure that you do exactly what I say, I'll be in the guest room of your place. Make sure you let me know when you get home... but don't let her find out that I'm watching you two." He sulks away from me, insinuating that my promise of sex won't be enough to fully convince him. If something were to go wrong tonight he wouldn't care to fix it. He wouldn't deny anything Areum swiftly out together and write it off as an assumption for my sake. Or worse, he'd just tell her himself. Ruin absolutely everything. The thought of simply killing him right here and now crosses my mind but I know better. With only the thought of having her after all of this was said and done, I lean over and places quick and open-mouthed kisses all over Jimin's collarbone area and slowly make my way to sit on his perfect thighs. He's what really brought out my bisexual. The fact that he's as twisted as I am, willing to fuck with Areum for the cause that I'm after and willingly, in exchange to, have intercourse with me over it. If it came down to it Jimin is easily more twisted than I am. Sure, he has no blood on his chubby little hands but if I asked him to... he'd do it without a second thought. His brand of crazy crosses the territory into psychotic, whereas mine was getting close to it until I met Areum. I gain a moan from him after one particular harsh suck that ends up on one of his sensitive little nipples. I work my body into a position that lands me lying on top of him perfectly and finally press my lips to his. I skip the bullshit foreplay that comes with effectively kissing anyone because Park Jimin is a horny bitch. My tongue destroys his relentlessly, gaining nothing but sweet moans that I gladly swallow whole. My mind shifts to what's it's effectively been for the past few years. Areum Choi.... Areum... Min Areum. Min Areum, oh my god. Suddenly I'm kissing her and not some pawn like Jimin. She's beneath me. She's got me hard. I can feel her hair between ever single one of my fingers and her hands gliding across my back. She starts rutting against my thigh to gain some sort of friction for her own horniness. "Areum." I moan loudly and move my lips to her exposed stomach but I'm greeted by hard abs and the salty taste of aroused sweat. She stops her movements still together. "Do you love her more than me?" Jimin's voice trails off as I get up and swing my legs over the edge of the bed. "You're in love with someone as stupid... as her. I've been dating that girl for almost five years. Been stuck with her, and I can't find one single reason to love her. That's besides her being decent in bed.... if the lights are off." I chuckle at his bluntness and let the fact that he insulted my angel slide just this one time. "That's because your bitch ass is gay."   •| intermission |• I used to get told that I'm obsessive. I'm not. I'm just heartless. I never smiled at birthday parties to pretend I was enjoying myself. I never flinched when some brainless girl threw herself at me with promises of love. Even when a guy did the same; I cared a bit more but not enough to change my ways. I'm heartless and I'm immune to the pain I inflict on others. •| intermission |•     Its like he's forcing himself to appear happy to be around me. Sometimes Jimin just doesn't look like he really wants to be as close to me as he is. He spends more time with his band mates, Jungkook to be more clear. It's almost like they're the ones dating. I laugh at my thoughts. That would explain enough. "Whats so funny?" He asks from his spot on the bed, his hand wrapped securely around his Xbox controller. "N-nothing, just laughing myself." I lie, but that joke isn't for him. He barely acknowledges that I answered his question having returned his attention to his game again. I crawl from the head of the bed to the foot where he's sitting and press my torso to his back, wrapping my arms around his waist and kissing his neck. "Jimin-ah," I whine. "Isn't there something else you'd rather be playing with." He doesn't answer again, becoming more enthusiastic about his gaming. "C-can you give me some space?" He half-heartedly shakes me off of his shoulder. I'm disappointed. I know our private life is rocky but I always assumed he was just shy to initiate anything. On our anniversaries he gets really into it, but now he's not even looking at me... I've never been the naughty type but a thought strikes me and I know it'll work for sure. I maneuver into a crouching position between Jimin's legs (he barely notices) and bother the waistband of his shorts. He just barely glanced at me before quickly shifting his attention back to the screen in front of him. He does bother to turn the mic part of his headset down so that no one can hear his following words. "What the fuck are you doing?" He glances down one more time and permanently this time, as I place caste kisses all I over his tip and then down his length. Only when I put my lips completely around him does he give me his undivided attention. "Shit," he moans to bury his hand in my hair, once neat and now getting manhandled. "Keep fucking going. Just like that, baby." His harsh treatment in my scalp doesn't cease and he starts rocking his hips, nailing me in the back of my throat every time and savoring the in-between sucks I'm giving him. He seems like he's trying to find the will to make me stop all together but I'm persistent. He's a moaning mess, fucking my face with his eyes full of unshed tears.           I can't believe that brat. I didn't give him that many instructions. I said one thing. Don't fuck her and what does he do? And that little exhibitionist knew damn well I was watching them. He was proud of himself. Areum just laid there riding him on our anniversary. That little fucking whore. I love her... so much. All I want to do his beat her... and kiss her... and slap and spit all over her... I need her. I can still here her moans vividly and can barely make out any of their shapes, naked and tangled together and fucking and licking and kissing and — "Jimin! Ah! Right there!" I hate this. I hate this too much. It would be so easy to burst in there and kill him. Kill them both. No, not both of them. Not either of them. I'm going to have to make my own move. I need to make a move without Jimin. I can't use him anymore. He's out.. he won't obey me.   I need to to make a move against him. ***** Euphoric ***** Chapter Fourteen : Euphoric • 2017 •   My name is Choi Areum and I'm just lost, trying to get found.     "Where did he go?" Jungkook powers off the Xbox and starts a conversation. I look up from my phone and shrug my shoulders. "Jimin? He wouldn't tell me." I explain while recounting the fight that it caused, his secrecy. Jungkook just hums in response and sits next to me on the couch of their lounge. I'm currently in their studio, where the record or practice. I don't know anymore. I stopped paying attention around two years back. We're just sitting in silence (more like he's just starring at me while I mindlessly scroll through my Twitter feed) and I finally speak up. "Kookie, are you bored?" He responds by putting his head in my lap like a child and looking up at me with wide eyes. "Play with my hair, Noona." I can't help but comply with his wishes happily. I love Jungkook for his childlike ways. The kid just started his fucking twenty's and I still treat him like a baby. He sighs softly as I run my fingertips gingerly against his scalp. "Noona, I have something to tell you but I don't want to hurt you. I know for sure that this will hurt you." His hesitant words peak my interest here but I don't allow that to stop my movements in his soft fluffy hair. I want to coax the information out of him with ease. "I appreciate that Kookie. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." I whisper and continue to caress his deep raven locks with its purple streaks fading slowly. "So when did you find out this... secret that could hurt me?" I start off without actually asking him directly but more of details that surround it and could most likely get him to let it slip. "After the very last DNA performance. That's maybe," He makes a thinking face and sighs and my fingers still buried in his hair. "A month ago." I don't reply. I'm not angry with him because he waited all of that time. It's not like I could be mad anyway without even knowing this secret for myself. "Noona, if you want to know, I'll tell you." Some part of me wants desperately to rip the information from him, but I know better. I know how Jungkook works. I have to get him to tell me without him actually telling me. If he knows that he let it slip then he'll just go straight to the person and they'll know everything. He's the type of person that you have to work around. "No, I don't want to get hurt Kookie. Remember?" I speak to him in a patronizing voice as if he really was a child. Jungkook sits up into a position where he's meeting me at eye level while lying across me. "Can I ask you a question Noona?" He stares into my eyes and cups my face, using his knees on either side of my legs to support himself. I feel my eyes blow up a bit, because this is as close as I've ever been to Jungkook in the entirety of my knowing him. "Have you ever kissed anyone?" My eyes can't help but stay locked in his brighter ones. I slowly nod my head in response. "I haven't." He continues. I don't completely believe that but I won't press him. I'll take his word for it. "Will you kiss me, Noona?" His lips are pouting. They're inviting. I've learned things about Jungkook. Mostly from the older members of BTS and mostly from Namjoon and Jin. Even Hoseok and maybe once from Taehyung. They've taught me that Jungkook acts innocent and sweet but he's devious and manipulative. There's always something more to him even if you can't see it in the beginning. "No." He chuckles and looks down, his grip falling to wrap around my neck and starting to harshly tighten but not really squeeze. My hands move quickly to meet his but primarily to make sure he doesn't choke me to death. "You're truly amazing. You know that Areum? You're... fucking amazing." His voice darkens considerably. I try to talk soothingly to him and not let him know that I'm starting to feel afraid of him at this moment. "Really? What about me-" I'm cut off by a sick laugh, coated in serious anger. "You're just..." He trails off and moves his hands down to cup my face again, forcing me to look him in the eyes. "It's the fact that you wouldn't cheat on Jimin," His eyes hold pure hatred for what he's about to say. "But he's been cheating on you." And then he just laughs... again and again.   •| intermission |• Sometimes your perfect plans fall apart. You can't trust people, not the way you used to. You can't listen to them. They're trying to sabotage you. •| intermission |•   It's really not like I didn't know it but it's more like I didn't want to admit it. I don't want it to be true. "I didn't want to hurt... you." Jungkook begins to cry. I can feel his tears landing beautifully on me. "I'm so happy that you did though." I reassure him. "So will you tell me what her name is?" He begins to swell with laughter again. "Her? Areum, come on. Don't be such a dumb ass." It's the first time I've ever really heard him curse. "What do you mean?" When his laughter dies down, he confesses before he can talk himself out of it. "Noona... hyung is getting fucked by a guy. He's gay." Jungkook blurts out losing all ability to care it his words are breaking me. "Who the hell didn't know that?" A deep voice enters the room, oblivious to the actual conversation. Namjoon's face pales when he notices the two that are really speaking and the unshed tears in my eyes. "Shit! Jungkook!" The younger scrambles off the chair and sprints past Namjoon to escape the yelling that will most certainly occur. Before Namjoon can say anything to alleviate my pain I mimic the other's movements and storm past him as well. How many of them knew and didn't tell me? I zip on my coat angrily, knowing exactly where I'm going. The place I can normally go for comfort would by Hyuri's, the other members of Royale... not so much. The debut has made us a bit shaky to one another. I can't really go see one of my band mates. There's a matter of keeping my shit private. I know exactly where I want to go and what I want to do. He lives within walking distance.     The door is unlocked. Never really a good song but I'm already on the brink of a meltdown so I'll stay optimistic for the time being. None of what I expected to find is there. Yes, there are clothes carelessly scattered across the floor. Yes, they look like the we're being ripped off in a way that suggests sex would ensue. "Hello?" I call and get an answer sooner than I thought I would. "Who's there?" I hear Yoongi's voice raise from his bedroom in a way that suggests he's afraid but I know he'd be quicker to defend himself than to run away or hide, even call for help. He's too good at masking his voice like that, tricking people and never failing. "Areum..." I respond hesitantly. He releases a breath of relief and continues. "Just wanted to talk if you have time. Do you?" It's a long while before he answers me back and al I really here as a response are shuffling and the sounds of drawers opening and closing, of jeans being hastily shimmied up one leg at a time, and ragged breathing. "Come in." His husky voice assaults my ears. "You weren't busy?" I ask in reference to his semi-clean but not really house. I think the only reason he bought his house smaller than every other member (despite being the richest) is because he'd never take care of it. "Yeah, but you sounded urgent." He starts to button up his shirt. I'm guessing I might've woken him up. He crosses the room to flick on a lamp, illuminating his features slightly and turning his pale skin a pretty pastel orange color. "I didn't mean to bother you." He chuckles at the shyness he accidentally brings out of me. "You're not," His hands run through my hair one time before patting a spot on his hastily made comforter. "What's up?" Yoongi asks me this so casually, I can't help but instantly want to spill all of my issues to him and completely fall into him. I know better. "Jungkook told me something today." I begin, certain that he's the person I want to talk to. He gives me a knowing look before uttering a hushed, "Oh God." "What?" I flip my hair out of my eyes which must be like an invitation for him to start playing with it. Our relationship slowly deteriorated back into what it was when we first met. I will admit that I found it strange to find him reentering my life by something that couldn't be written off as a coincidence, but I'll never act on this instinct to cut him off for my own good. I absolutely love being his friend again. "It just seems like every time Jeon Jeongguk opens his mouth that's when the stupid shit starts." He rolls his eyes yet continues to twirl loose strands of my hair between his fingers. "Anyway, what did he tell you? What was it about?" "Jimin." I don't even add the normality of honorifics when I say his name, and Yoongi only finds that off because I always add an "-ah" or an "-oppa." "What did he fucking do?" He growls, giving his voice an 'I've had enough of this bullshit' vibe and sitting up to listen with earnest. "It's just... Kook said he was seeing someone else. He said Jimin was gay." An emotion flashes through his eyes but I can't read it fast enough before it's gone, replaced by worry. "I'm not going to lie. Jimin art off my gay-dar the minute I met him but I wrote it off. Do you think he's cheating?" Yoongi pulls me close to his chest and lets us fall back onto the pillows, cuddling with me on the brink of tears. "I don't think I can trust Jimin anymore."       "I did exactly what you told me to do, hyung. Did I do a good job? Was Kookie a good boy?" I pet his soft brown hair in assurance. "Kookie was such a good boy for his daddy." ***** Consume ***** Chapter Fifteen : Consume • 2017 •   My name is Min Yoongi. I'm heartless.       "You can stay here if you want. You'd probably rather not be with Jiminie right now." I offer, silently hoping that she stays with me forever. She nods and yawns, stretching her arms. "You can wear some of my clothes. I bet you'd look cute as hell." Risky sentence to say but we're platonic for now. Areum just giggles a bit and accepts my offer. I've never actually seen her in my clothes but I pictured it too many times for my health. "How's a really long button up sound?" I ask her cute ass, not objecting to her already stripping. She's comfortably enough to undress in front of me and I fucking love it. I'm doing my best to not look like a pervert but I can't help but admire her supple breasts, the curve of her ass, her delectable pale skin and how much I want to bury a blade deep within her. I can almost visualize how smoothly it'll cut and the warmth that will simply leak out of her. How her flesh will cut like butter, clean (just like that) and pale and red and perfect... She'll scream her throat raw to which I'll happily swallow every squeal of pain and agony with my mouth, drinking her displeasure. And I see myself smearing it, the blood, all over her body. Saliva fills my mouth and this visual of fucking her bloody body, leaking, seeping, pouring... "You okay?" I jump at the touch of her hand in my shoulder but regain my composure quickly. "Yep, just really sleepy." I lie, binding my needs to end up and to force myself on her. She nods kindly, not noticing the psychotic moment that just took place within me. "Same here." She's now dressed cutely in my clothes and grabbing a small pillow to leave. "I'll take the couch." I hold my hand out to her from my side of the bed where my legs are folded in the middle of it. My mouth doesn't even move but my eyes trap hers in a knowing look. I don't plan on doing anything tonight, sure I've successfully made a move against Jimin and forced her to never trust him again. I'm holding the upper hand. I've got her desperately clinging to anyone that can show her affection of any kind. She needs me but if I want the moment I've been waiting for to be worth all of this effort, if I want it to mean anything to me, I'll have to take my time and play with her for awhile. Areum takes the hint and lies down to match me comfortably. She doesn't notice the way my hands caress her hips or the way I inhale the fruity scent of her hair. She's too ignorant. "Just like the old days," I chuckle, successfully getting her in my arms and admiring the pink dusted on her cheeks. She thinks that it's too dark for me to see it but I could never miss it. She smiles. "Yeah, before I quit college." "It turned out to me a great idea. It worked out for you and honestly you were right." I have her full attention. "Right out what?" I'm about to have her. She only needs to hear one more thing before I own this bitch. "I do regret not believing in you. I regret not telling you how much I loved you." Without giving her so much as a minute to process what's happening, I rush my lips onto hers and overtake her mouth.   •| intermission |• Like I said before, to never trust someone. No matter how badly you want to, and to love them. They don't love you. They want to watch you suffer. They want to watch you bleed out at their feet. •| intermission |•   He's powerful when he's kissing me and it's been about four years since the last time I've felt this type of passion. It's the feeling of his lips and the warmth of his tongue in my mouth that's what gets me high from him and drunk off of his kiss. He pulls away all to soon —boy do I fucking hate it when he pulls away— and it leaves me chasing his mouth with my own. It's needy of me, really, but I don't want it to end. My legs swing to rest on either side of his laying form and my mouth attacks his again at full force. I feel him smirk into my kiss and it's annoying. He's beating me. He's winning. I feel his hands on my hips and on my waist, urging my to grind further down onto him and to repeat the process over again. I'm feeling needy now that he's forcing my hips down, forcing his erection to come in contact with my wetting area, with his strong hands and thrusting his tongue in and out of my mouth. I don't know when I started moan but it's causing him to smirk against my mouth more than ever. I hate that I have to pull away for a breath due to his intoxicating ways but I succumb to it. "Fuck," He groans not allowing me to cease my hip movements. "Keep going, baby girl." I groan I return as I feel his hands move so that I can fondle other parts of my body. Yoongi sits up to kiss my exposed neck area. My hands snake around his neck and bury themselves in his soft almost white hair, due to the fading of it being blue just three months ago. "Ah, Suga." I accidentally remind him that I'm the one that named him that to begin with. It just fuels him to keep attacking me with bites across my pale skin. How did we end up like this? So close to fucking and my boyfriend is cheating on me with some other person, a guy at that. So my solution is to get in bed with my friend? "Areum..." He pants out of breath from the pleasure we're giving to each other. "Can I please make love to you here?" I'm completely out of breath from the shockwaves of it all but somehow still find the strength to answer him. "Yoongi," my hands pull his hair harshly, but he clearly loves it. "I want you to fuck me right here and right now." ***** Wish ***** Chapter Sixteen : Wish • 2017 •   My name is Areum and I find myself noticing that in my life, it's just one thing after the next. That's not what I planned. It's not what I wished for.   I think it really went downhill when I told Jimin about what Jungkook told me. The two quit talking all together, raising suspicion in their fanbase and more dedicated netizens. Namjoon, the leader is more involved, blamed me for it although he let it go when he realized it's not my fault that Jimin didn't tell me he was gay. What did he expect me to do? Stay with him even though he's not attracted to me and cheating with a guy. Sure, try using your I.Q, Mr. Genius. Anyway after that the other members have lost their focus on the actual work they're supposed to be doing. Taehyung, Seokjin, and Hoseok aren't focusing. They're being good friends but they keep skipping dance practices and vocal practices. With Namjoon hating me, Jimin and Jungkook hating each other, Yoongi not bothering to leave his house unless I motivate him, and the other three all together not caring... People are calling me the girl that destroyed BTS. Today is dedicated to fixing my image. Not only is it bad for me but it's bad for Royale, my group. Our album sales have simply stopped. "I don't have much time. We have a concert tonight. It's only our fourth but I'm still not really getting the hang of it." I swivel my hips a bit in order to get a good grip on his shoulders, but then settle for gliding my hands across the expanse of his exposed back. "Mhm, right there." Yoongi groans before he catches himself. "Oh, I was still nervous by my fourth show. Just go out there, concentrate, do your best, and be yourself." He finishes half-heartedly. "Do you have any less generic advice?" "Focus on my shoulders." He keeps his eyes closed, lost to my actions. I knew where the conversation was going the minute he got back to his place where I'd be waiting, and the first words out of his mouth were, 'You know, one day you might really be Min Areum. I've always wanted my wife to be good at giving massages. Come practice?' Thats how I knew he wouldn't be able to take me seriously. "Yoongi..." I whine, and stop my actions. "Please help me. I'm really afraid for tonight." He hears the waver in my voice. "Okay, babygirl. Listen to daddy." He gets up and positions my on his lap, starts fiddling with the hem of my pastel thigh highs, the bows at the top of them and the squishy fat of my thighs. "I'll be backstage the whole time. I'll be there as soon as you get on and as soon as you get off. You're going to go up there and be your adorable self. Your aegyo is going to be... perfect. And then we're going to come home so I can pound into you like you deserve. Alright?" "You know, we're really fucking up our friendship." I grace the outline of his ever present abs. "I hope I don't sound bad when I say this," His hands lightly smacks my thigh but not that hard. "I don't care." I plant a kiss to his lips, something we've been doing a lot and helping me get over the news about Jimin.   "Neither do I."     •| intermission |• Happiness doesn't just fall into your lap. You either did something to deserve it or it's a deception. You'll have to pay the appropriate price in order to keep it. •| intermission |•     "Hold still!" The artist forcefully grabs my chin, most likely leaving a red mark and causing me to wince in pain. "Hey," Yoongi holds his hands up forcefully, warning the older woman that she'd better let go. I think he's about to yell, fight the way he usually does and not bother fighting down his temper but he takes a more tolerant approach. "I'll take it from here." He simply provides a smile, forcing the trainee make- up artist to give up and take her leave. "They can't be harsh on you guys like that. You're still a fresh fish." He takes hold of the steaming hair straighteners and starts sectioning off my hair like he's done this before. I can't help but feel a tings of jealousy. Those years in which we weren't close, was he out there playing with other girl's hair or something? I won't let myself linger on this subject. "It's nothing new." I mumble, uncaring. "The other three have complained about it but it's useless." "Why don't you complain? You're the group's leader. You'll get shit done. Plus, you're a fucking bad ass." Yoongi's compliment forces me to wave him off but my face's temperature rises and I feel it degree by degree. He notices it, that once faint pink turned full-face crimson, and instantly comes to match the hue in the same way. That leaves a sweet feeling in the pit of my stomach. Even if he had ever been with another girl during our separation, I'm positive I'm the only one that can make him blush like this. I'm the only one that can make him lose that stoic demeanor. "I'm not really that much of a... thank you." I give in and accept that comment, hoping that it'll give me some confidence for when I do confront management about our testy makeup artists. "Baby, you're an idol now. You have to demand respect." I'm about to interject about how my experience so far hasn't been this way, but I cut off instantly. "Areum-ssi, can we talk?" Jimin rests a hand on my shoulder standing on the opposite side of Yoongi. He tended up at the new presence but concentrates more on finishing the last couple of strands of my waist length hair. "Just hurry so I can work on your colors." Jimin takes that as permission to pull me from the vanity chair and into a more secluded backstage room. "Where are we right now?" He asks, pulling a ceiling string in order to illuminate a single lightbulb in the cramped room. "It's called a closet Jimin." I cross my arms over my chest. "I mean in our relationship," He rolls his eyes. "I haven't seen you in nine days. Are we over?" It's my turn to roll my eyes. He brings this up right before a concert? That's a stupid move. "I thought I made that clear." Jimin grabs my shoulders forcefully but not in a threatening way. Another harsh assault is enough to bring a fresh batch of unshed tears to my eyes. "What did he tell you? What kind of lies did he feed you?" "Who!" I try to squeeze out of Jimin's grasp, now shedding the tears. "Min Yoongi!" He throws his arms up in exasperation. "Areum, don't be stupid. He's fucking with you. He's literally a psychopath." "You sound more like the crazy one here." "You don't believe me? Wow," He looks offended but shrugs it off in a sarcastic way. "Fine, you'll regret not listening to me when you realize who he really is." I give Jimin a simple and half-hearted whatever, then take my leave because I only have about two hours left before we have to get serious. If I'm being honest here, I would've been surprised if Jimin didn't freak out like this. It's just like him to try and make Yoongi look like the bad guy here so he could win. I'm over it. I deserve to be happy, and I deserve to be happy with Yoongi.   He might really love me. ***** Flame ***** Short chapter but from here on, consider this book 18+ because there's a lot of hardcore shit here. I'll add the official warnings at the end of this chapter. It's what you need to expect for the rest of this book.     Chapter Seventeen : Flame • 2017 •   My name is Min Yoongi and I'm kind of getting bored with my prey. I'm ready to end this.   "Words can not describe how proud of you I am. Did they just make up that fanchant?" I'm faking it. Seeing her come down from the platform, scared, sweating, smiling, and out of breath but clearly feeling a performance high. "Yeah, I think so because this is the first time I've heard it." Areum giggles with her words and her face flushed again. Idiot. My beautiful little idiot. How does she not know I've been fucking with her all these years? When something in her life went wrong, made her miserable, I was there. I was always there. Nothing makes me happier than the look on her pretty little face full of tears. That's what I live for. She's letting herself fall for me. She's too careless to let me win like this. She's making it easy. It's been happening like this for the past couple of days. I've been getting considerably bored with Choi Areum but I could never let her know. No, that simply won't do. But I'm certain I'm ready to end this tonight. It's just getting to a point in which I could... not go another minute without being able to freely tear Areum apart. All I want... all I want is to kill her! I want to do this right now! I don't care about the masses of people, witnesses, I don't fucking care! I need her! I have to... I have to stop myself from hyperventilating. "Let me take you somewhere." I blurt out without caring to think. No, he's getting impatient. She stutters for a minute, clearly shocked by my abruptness. It's cute, really, watching her stutter like a baby. Seeing her act like a real girl... like a girl that's actually desirable. "Yeah," She finally lands on. "Let's go."   It's like she wants me to do this.   •| intermission |• Impatience is also a virtue. Mutilating someone out of love is an art. I am an artist. •| intermission |•     I thank myself from the past. I don't remember the exact day I bought this studio and I don't remember furnishing it in such a romantic way but too glad that I did. It really only consists of a bedroom, a living room, kitchen, one bathroom, and the centerpiece of it all would be my... personal room. "There's... Areum pay attention to me." I stop the girl from starring at random things in wonder with the snap of my voice. She doesn't look to afraid but that's about to change. "Follow me." I don't smile. I don't continue to fake it. That bullshit that I used to think she'd only respond to. I don't keep that part of the game going. That's over. "Sit," I turn on the light switch, reminding myself that all of the lights in this house are red. She does as she's told hesitantly, still trying to hold onto the fact that I once told her she could trust me. "Now you're going to do as I say for the rest of the night or," I open a drawer and pull out exactly what I want and slam it on the table. A perfectly sharp, and pitch black knife. I can't remember exactly what it's made from but that the furthest from my mind right now. "I'll kill you, bitch." Her eyes blow wide after seeing my weapon of choice, after realizing what's happening. Maybe you should've listened to that fucker Jimin when he tried to tell you about what I had planned for you, stupid whore. I can't kill him, but I'll punish him when I'm done here. I can see the beginnings of unshed tears in her brown eyes. "Don't start crying. Don't even bother crying for help. Baby, that's only going to hurt one of us and it for damn sure isn't going to be me." A tear escapes her eyes anyway, violating my word and she receives her due punishment in full. A perfect smack sound bounces off the walls as my hand beats into her right cheek. I knock her onto her side but she gets up, clearly afraid to have her back turned to me when I have a knife on my bedside table. "Strip." My eyes stare into hers full of fear. "Now, and get in a position on the bed that would make me happy. You have two minutes until I get back. Don't disappoint me." I walk away from her but instead I turn around only to find her eyes looking over the knife. How stupid does she think I am? "You're not my first victim. Certainly not my first hostage, maybe the dumbest though." I take the knife in my hand and run it over the expanse of her neck, letting her feel how cold it is and how it's going to feel on her skin. "Don't make me do to you, what I did to Cheong Somin. Don't make to rip your corpse apart too." I drop the information on her like it's nothing, because it isn't anything to me. This causes a flurry of tears and whines out of her but I won't punish her for it this once. "You have a minute and a half.         If it isn't horrifyingly obvious, I'm doing my best to wrap this book up. Also, if it isn't obvious... Min Yoongi is psychotic. In each chapter from here on of this book you should expect :   • kidnaping (he kidnapped Areum in this chapter but you get what I'm saying) • violence (blood, gore, body part separating) • rape/non-consensual sex • victimizing and degradation • long-term capture • being in the point of view of someone with dangerous mental health   I hope to God I have scared any of you away. ***** Monster ***** Please heed the warnings from the previous chapter's, ending notes. They will be in full affect during this chapter.   Chapter Eighteen : Monster • 2017 •   My name is Min Yoongi. I enjoy hearing her screams. I enjoy seeing her blood smeared across every available surface. I love the way it tastes.           She's more disappointing than I thought she would be. I'm not sure what I was expecting from this girl. She's probably still trusting of me. Maybe I should beat her for a few days, not feed her and leave some marks on her... That would do it. "Y-Yoongi, why are you doing this?" She sniffs from her spot on her knees. I haven't done anything to her yet. She didn't follow my instructions so I took the liberty of ripping her clothes off and sitting her in front of me, hitting her a few times in the process. Her eyes meet mine, watering and pleading me for mercy. All I give her is a cold glare, then something inside me snaps. I slap her more than once until she's screaming. The sound of her flesh being attacked fills the room. "Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" I yell between each blow. "Just shut up!" I watch as she cries on the tiled floor, blood pooling from some place on her head and trailing onto the ground. I take a deep breath and grab the knife. My hands find their way to tangle in her ridiculously long hair. "I'm going to teach you something because we're going to be spending a few days —not more than a week or two— together. Do you understand? Nod if yes," She blinks a few tears away and I take notice of the bruises forming in the places that I've assaulted. Then she nods carefully, but it's restricted due to my hands yanking her hair. She winces after a harsh tug. My lips trace her neck, feeling a bruise with my lips. "Lay down." Without even thinking about it Areum falls onto her back, leaving me on top of her and successfully making me hard. I can't wait anymore. "If you ever talk back without permission, I'll stab you. Simply for the pleasure of hurting you but I won't kill you. Are you tough enough for that pain? No, you're not. So do as I say." I continue without letting her take a moment to register what I've said. My lips graze her neck and I let my teeth bite onto the shell her ear. I hum in pleasure, being this close to her. The moment is only ruined by her hushed sobs. "And shut the fuck up," I sit up and grab her face, thrusting my pelvis onto hers and having to spread her legs even more so that she feels the fabric of my black jeans on her bare clit. She gasps at the feeling and whines a bit more. "You cry too much. If you don't stop, I'll have to fix you which is definitely worse than just gagging you, princess." She nods to signal that she understands, already following the rule of not speaking unless spoken to. Smart girl. "Lastly, there's only one name I'm going to let you call me from here on." I say recounting that time only a few years ago that we were in my studio, writing lyrics for a mixtape. She's the person that gave me the name Suga, therefore she gave me the next name. Her eyes tell me that she knows exactly what I'm about to say but I crave the satisfaction of shoving the words into her head anyway. "Agust D."   •| intermission |• She's perfect. I love the way she looks at me. Her eyes full of fear, and tears. I made that happen. I made her who she is today. •| intermission |•   I have Areum bent over a desk in the living room. I simply will never find a view like this. Her; completely naked, ropes tying her wrists in front of her. Her panties settled at her shaking ankles. There's silent tears falling from her eyes but she's quiet about it, no rule broken yet. To top it all off, her wet folds lined perfectly with my tongue. Her taste is a delicacy. Sweet, and wet with the forced orgasm she's undergone. I hum against her clit and start sucking on her core. My tongue fucks into her without showing intention of stopping at all but I do. "You little slut," I slap one of her exposed ass cheeks and then grab onto her whole backside to squeeze it harshly. "You love the way it feels, don't you? You love my tongue shoved up your greedy little hole? Tell me how much you love it." Areum breaks her sobs long enough to answer me. "I l-love it, Agust. I love it so much." That's what I like to hear. I want nothing more that to simply bury my dick into her and hate-fuck her on ever piece of furniture I own. I know better than to do that right now. Instead I finger her to completion one more time, loving her small moans of fear. As if she knows that if she refuses to moan for me she'll be punished for sure. Once her cum is spilling onto the table and she's whining, holding back tears from the pain of being over-stimulated, I grab onto her waist and throw her over my shoulder carrying her to the special room as mentioned before. There's another red light in this room, and once it flickers on I hear her breathing absolutely stop. "Oh baby, you should've seen this coming. I told you it would last as long as a week. It's been three days." "Agust, no. No, please. I do as you say. I follow instructions." I carry her in and sit her on the metal chair, cuffing her to the armrests to take in the picture of her naked body, disgusting and abused and beaten. Ah, she struggles to get her arms free and every time she tugs a bit, her giant breasts bounce perfectly. I have to savor this. "Listen, I'll give you some more time since I'm getting hard again." I say unbuckling my belt and letting my pants and underwear be kicked off and left somewhere else. "I don't normally like to get off in this room. This is where I kill all of my victims. Notice the blood that hasn't gone down the floor drain yet," I laugh. "But you kind of look like a snack here." It's not long before my hard cock is in front of her, and she knows the fucking drill, lick the tip, kiss it, then swallow it. Hands handle what can't fit in her whore mouth and I make sure to un-cuff one hand solely for the purpose. "I'm almost there. When- fuck when I come don't swallow it. I'll tell you what to do with it." I throw my head back and force her to gag some more. "Take it all, you little cumslut. You want your daddy's come, don't you? You want to taste me. Fucking hell." As soon as I release my hot load into her mouth, I pull her off instantly, loving the obscene popping noise that assaults my ears. I catch my breath and then look at her again. My hand goes up to grope at her breasts, that aroused me to begin with. "Don't ever expect me to say this again, but I want you to spit it out. Spit my cum between your breasts." She looks up at me with confusion and all it takes to get her to do as I say is a flash of the knife from earlier and a quirk of my eyebrow. I watch as my seed flows down her chest in the valley of my girlfriend's boobs. I smear some of it more in the space before leaning her chair in a better position and sticking my dick in between her large and warm mounds. "Oh god," I squeeze them together so that the hug my dick perfectly. "Fuck yes." Her silent tears just add to the lubrication and make my fucking her chest that much better. I allow myself to speed up, knowing that it's hurting her a bit. "Areum," I feel myself approaching my climax and chase that feeling like my fucking life depends on it. My head is thrown back and my eyes are screwed shut when she lets a strangled cry out, violating the rules but I don't move enough. Instead, I just throw a hard slap across her face to shut her up (although this room is sound proofed) and fuck her until my cum rains down covering her chest and my thighs. "Oh, Min Areum." I breathe raggedly before speaking up again, and tucking my now soft cock into my pants. "I need to go out. I'm supposed to be helping the guys look for you since you're now a missing person. While I'm gone, I guess... I'll just leave you in here. This room is sound proofed but I keep a mic in here just in case. When I listen to the record I better not hear a sound." I don't even have to threaten her to know that she'll listen to me.   "See you in a couple of days then, princess." ***** Maniac ***** Chapter Nineteen : Maniac • 2017 •   My name is Park Jimin and no one knows regret the way I do. (Not in Jimin's POV until intermission)     "This is fucking insane. We've known her for almost eight years, Yoongi-hyung for longer, but we can't think of one place where she could've gone." Namjoon slams his laptop shut, opened to research page centered around Royale. Comments about Areum missing keep popping up and news articles about her have taken over my notifications and every news and magazine outlet. "If I don't take a break, I'll lose my damn mind." Namjoon stalks out of the room, finally at his limit for now. Jin gets up to replace him, opening the laptop. "I'll take over." "I'll get you guys something to drink. I say in reference to the fact that we've been holed up for a few hours now. Jimin follows me into the kitchen, muttering something about going to help me out, but doesn't say anything until we're both out of earshot of everyone else. "Hyung." "Yes?" I answer, ignoring his honorific affection. Jimin doesn't speak up for a second, but of course I know exactly why he's here. I know exactly why he's been looking for an opportunity to speak with me alone. I know he's relieved that I finally gave him an opening. "Do you know where she is?" He reverts into a childlike person. He's shy and for the first time I can't tell if it's a façade. If Jimin is playing me by acting like this. I follow my instincts. "Yes, I know exactly where she is." I start piling cans of soda, according to each members favorite type, in my arms and even give Jimin a couple. "Don't bother with any other questions because there's nothing anyone can do to find her." He falters for a second but ultimately knows I've won here. "Mianhae? What are you guys talking about?" Namjoon flickers on a lamp from the open concept living room, scaring the hell out of both Jimin and I. Namjoon is the smartest out of us all. No one can easily get away with lying to him, especially not Jimin. That's why I have to beat him to the kill. "He thinks I might know where Areum could be," I look away to grab a few more cans. "You know, since I've known her longer. I'll be in my room and I'll think some more but I'm telling you guys, we're not close like that anymore." He just nods. He does press the matter any further. It'll stay my secret. Min Areum will be my secret for some time. Not much. You see, she doesn't have much time left.   •| intermission |• Hyung has been acting worse than usual. It scares me but I feel the worst guilt now. If he kills Areum I'll be her partial murderer and I'm not sure if I can live with myself as that type of person. I'll hate myself. •| intermission |•   "Hyung, can we talk for a moment?" Jungkook pokes his head in mind and Taehyung's room. Tae takes that as his cue to give us some privacy and closes the door behind him. Jungkook wastes no time. "Yoongi-hyung left," He sits on the foot of my bed and crawls until he's hovering above me, arms on either side of me to support himself. His lips kiss my forehead twice. "He wouldn't say where he was going and I thought about following him but..." His head falls to rest in my chest and he exhales deeply. "I'm so afraid of him." My hands play with the younger's hair and I let him hum in content with the feeling. He loves it. "Me too, Kookie." My chest rises and I look down to see his wide eyes fluttering and starring across the room. He looks so innocent sometimes. "How many times did he fuck you?" I gag at the question. Where the hell did that come from? He smiles in amusement but doesn't move from his spot on top of me. "You're still a baby. Who taught you those words?" He doesn't respond to my patronizing words, and instead keeps his question standing. "I don't know. Twice, maybe three times before he did whatever with Areum." Jungkook hums. "We only did it once. After he told me to tell Areum that you were gay. I topped him too." "He payed you with sex?" Jungkook scoffs and shifts to look me in the eyes. "He did the same thing to you, didn't he? He played us both."   And it's times like this that Jungkook is clearly smarter than we give him credit for.           "Wake up, wifey. I have a fun surprise for you." I rasp, savoring the fearful and initial shock her expression goes through. She looks like she was hoping everything that she's gone through so far was a dream. "This is all very real, baby." I say just in case I'm right. I have her full attention now. "Do you smell that?" I crinkle my nose in mock disgust and proceed to look around my surroundings. Areum has become alert enough to take notice of the curtain on the left wall that wasn't there earlier. I hope she'll be able to see all of my hard work clearly even with the red lights. "Maybe it's coming from here?" I yank the curtain whimsically and take in her expression.   And I live for the horrible scream that comes from her when she sees her dead parents, hanging from my ceiling. ***** Orphaned ***** Chapter Twenty : Orphaned • 2017 •   My name is Areum. No longer Choi, and I'd rather be dead than living the way I am now.   It's the worst feeling I've ever experienced. There's so many emotions crossing me right now that I'm afraid I might break for good here and now. The feeling of being orphaned in an instant there's nothing worse. The real kicker is the fact that the person that's doing this to you is someone you thought you were in love with. It's the fact that I was so damn sure that I could trust him. Jimin was actually right about this. He was right about it all. "Look at them." He crosses his arms over his chest and stares at my parents. Their bodies are bare just like mine but covered in dried blood and stab wounds. "They called your phone. Said they wanted to visit you, and support your career or some bullshit like that. And when they asked what your address was, you told them to come straight here." I feel my stomach turning and lose what little food he's given me. When I look up, Yoongi honestly looks surprised, like he expected me to be stronger than this but also proud that he's broken me down. "Well, alrighty then." He starts unshackling my chains and drags me across the room. Instead I'm now in a seat with my legs chained to it. "You right handed or left handed?" My voice cracks like hell and my throat burns from the screaming. "Left." I also know that if I refuse to answer he'll beat the hell out of me. With this answer my left hand is now shackled to the arm of the chair. "We're going to play a game. I'll go get the other players." There a sick quirk in his voice and I hate where this is going. I hate that this is the man that holds my life now. It isn't long before he's dragging in his other 'game players' in. They're kicking and screaming the same way I was and they're tied up too. By the sound of it, this girl he's caught is gagged. I pity her. I wish he'd leave his sadistic tendencies limited to just me because I'd rather me only have to endure shit like this. I have to force myself to not look back at the tragedy hanging from the wall. When he forces the smaller girl to sit in the same position as me, shackling her right arm and her legs I finally look up to see her red, and tear streaked face. "Seulgi? Oh my god," My head whips to see Yoongi simply smiling at me. She just starts trying to scream even more. "You bastard! Why are you doing this? She didn't do anything to deserve this!" But when I think about it... neither did I. Min Yoongi's type is innocent. "Be quiet," He groans as he goes off into the same direction to pull in Ah- yeong. Although there's something different about the situation this time. "It was a bit more difficult getting her here. I had to go ahead and fix this one. If I hadn't, daddy would've gotten caught girls." He puts her in the seat next to me, as if he's trying make sure I get a good look at my future if I don't keep doing as he says. Ah-yeong doesn't say anything. It's not until he moves some of her pink hair back that we can see what he's done and what he means when he says he'll fix me. Thread keeps her lips together and it weaves in a crisscrossed pattern adorned with blood here and there. He literally sewed her mouth shut.   •| intermission |• Experiences like this can destroy a person. Even if you do escape it, you can never return back to your normal life. Your existence has been reduced down to this. You'll be better off dead. •| intermission |•   Seulgi, Ah-yeong, and I watch as Yoongi carries in our final member over his shoulder. "Hyuri!" Seulgi cries, finding her voice and it's clearer when it's not choked up by tears. Hyuri looks out of it and it's like she doesn't even hear Seulgi's tiny voice. "This one was tough to kidnap as well. Drugged her up a little bit it should being waring off any second now. We have to make sure she feels as much pain as the rest of you, right?" Yoongi situates her the same way and we all notice that she's the same as me. Completely naked. "She's literally the cutest thing I've ever seen. Had to have some fun with her in the bedroom before we started." A sick feeling erupts from my stomach but I choke the bile down, knowing that Yoongi won't let me go without consequence twice. He proceeds to check all of our binds once more before he speaks up again, this time quieting the crying girls. "I told you all the rules before I brought you in. If you're not going to follow them... I guess I get to punish you." He says in reference to the the fact that I'm the only one not sobbing. I know they can't help it, after seeing the hanging bodies from the ceiling that I refuse to let my eyes linger on. Yoongi pulls out a small blade and advance towards Seulgi, touching her just before she screams. I have to look away but the only places to look are either corpse or Ah-yeong's disfigurement. Instead I watch as he, doesn't let the blade cut into her, but starts cutting a clean line up her stripped shirt until it's sliced off of her to showcase her smaller breasts and her pale skin. "Little slut, no bra?" He says, ignoring her cries and teasing her nipples before he moves onto Ah-yeong. He rips everyone else's clothes apart and delivers a sick laugh after taking in our bodies. Yoongi leans down whisper in my ear. "But not a single one of them will ever be as sexy as you are." It's a sick compliment really, under these circumstances. "Wow, I have Royale here with me. How about a song ladies? I'm your biggest fan I swear." But none of us say anything. The girls have been reduced to silent tears as I used to be. I've cried all of my tears out. "No?" He shrugs and the ripping of Velcro fills our ears, then the clicking of metal. "Then we can just skip to the game." Yoongi runs a hand through his eyes platinum hair; that he must've done last night because his hair was blue for the DNA comeback. The metal we heard is placed on the table, right in the middle, for us all to see. It's a gun, and from the sound of it's heft, it's not fully loaded.   "Ladies, the game is Russian Roulette. Winner takes all." ***** Winner ***** Chapter Twenty-One : Winner • 2017 •   My name is Areum. What has my world been reduced to in a week? What has Agust D turned me into?     "I'm sure you already know the rules," He starts stalking around the table, circling us. "I have my own version though." He winds a finger into Hyuri's shoulder length white hair but notices the mint green ends. I know he was about to say that he's the only one that can have this color, or some stupid shit like that, but let it slide due to the multi- coloration. He settles for take the hair tie out of Seulgi's orange/blond half- up-half-down style and tying Hyuri's hair into a short tail that swings when she turns her head. I went through the same thing when I got here. He spent the first day playing with my black hair and complimenting the purple highlights (for the debut) in between each blowjob I was forced to give him. During this whole time I still haven't had to have actual intercourse with him and I'm so unbelievably thankful for that. "The original game is players going in a circle, holding the gun to their head and trying to see who gets the bullet, there's only one." He explains. "My version is better though. Instead I have three bullets," I already feel sick. Maybe I should shoot all three into myself to save the others from dealing with this psychopath's bullshit. No, then he'd just reload it with two bullets and continue without me. I'm their leader and to do that would endanger them further. "You'll go in a circle but instead of holding the gun to your own head you'll aim it at another player. The only thing... the only thing that makes it easy is that this revolver has a five bullet capacity that means the blanks could be in between each bullet, or they could be wherever the fuck I want them. You guys understand?" I'm the only one that nods. He can't get angry because I'm the only one that's broken in. I'm the only one that knows what happens without obedience. "Let's stop wasting time then, or I'll shoot you all." He doesn't mean it. I know him too well. If anything he'll kill them but keep me and it sickens me to my very core. "Hyuri is up first." She squeaks and struggles to grip the gun properly. That's why he chained our primary hands. Protection. He has to ensure that we're only strong enough to aim at each other being as close as we are, and not strong enough to aim at him. He's not given enough credit, is he? "It's okay, Yuri." I try to calm her. That responsibility falls on me, since I'm the oldest. I'm the only one that knows what's happening here. Ah-yeong whines next to me as Hyuri shakily aims at her. Her ragged breaths are muffled due to her mouth's abuse. A thin line of blood seeps from the corner where she trying to pull the thread but he sewed it too well. "Shoot. You have five seconds or I'll kill you both." "Yoongi..." I'm hushed with a cold glare. "Don't call me that." He grits his teeth before returning his attention to the scene in front of all of us. Tears fall from Hyuri's eyes like a waterfall, as she pulls the trigger and squeezes her eyes shut. There's a loud pop and then nothing but smoke. Ah-yeong is still alive. "Only one blank left, sluts." I calculate the odds of me getting a bullet if I were to be aimed at next. He said that he didn't leave them in a pattern, which could mean anything but the chances of a bullet being in the next one are better than it not. Whoever gets aimed a next will surely die and that's what cracks me. This really is just a game.   •| intermission |• Wouldn't it be better to make someone else feel pain if it ensures that you wouldn't? I'd only get to live another day; only if I made sure that they didn't. I'm sorry but that's just not how I operate. I refuse. •| intermission |•   "Saylor, you're next." He refers to Seulgi as her stage name, which comes across as taunting. Seulgi looks up at him with big eyes before taking the gun in her weaker hand and aiming it at Ah-yeong. There's not even enough time to think. It's all happening too fast. The loud bang and then the muffled scream. There's blood everywhere. Not thinking about this, been put in the situation, I've never seen someone get shot in my life. Not until I watch one of my group members kill another. She can't even scream properly because she's been fixed. This girl is dead. I pity her, being aimed at twice in a row. She didn't have a chance in this game, because the other two made it that way. Maybe they're not cruel, the girl was in obvious pain because of her fixing. They set her free of that. More than anything I envy her. She's free of this nightmare. "Three girls, two bullets, one blank. This is really getting interesting, yeah? You're up next, wifey." I was dreading it more than anything. How could I do this to them? I'm their leader. They look up to me as the strong one, but here I am weaker than ever and now hold a gun to Seulgi's head. "This time shoot it twice. Just to see what happens." Yoongi takes a black bag from the shelf with bold white words on it that read to burn. I watch in horror from the corner of my eye as he packs Ah-yeong into it without emotion. "Now, Minmin." My stomach can barely handle him calling me by that but I look back at my target. "Be heartless, babe. Kill or be killed." He whispers. I don't think about it. Making peace with having blood on my hands for however long the rest of my life lasts. I pull the trigger once nothing. A second time, she's dead. I. Just. Killed. Someone.   "You're making me so hard for you right now." ***** Trick ***** Chapter Twenty-Two : Trick • 2017 •   My name is Areum and from here on, I'm determined to take his advice for once. It's kill or be killed.     "Let's end the game here. It wouldn't be much more fun if there's only two of you. Areum, remind me to get more players next time I want to play this game." He packs the gun away, still two bullets left and straps it onto his waist holster. It looks in place on him, matching all of the black he's wearing that's contrasting his white hair and his snowy pale skin. "Agust," I start, making sure he doesn't hit me. When it's safe to speak I test my luck even more. "Can we come out of this room?" I would quite rather not stay in a room full of the corpses of my friends and family and Hyuri looks like she's going to lose it any second now. He ponders my question for a moment. "The only reason I'd let you guys out for a while is if you could do something for me in return. Can either of you do something for me in return?" He smirks, and everyone that's still alive knows exactly what he wants. I don't want to touch this guy, this guy that forced me to kill my friends. I'm not sure if I can handle it. Not in the condition I'm in, although I've had to do it for days. Nevertheless, I'm still Royale's leader. It's still my responsibility to take care of them even if there's only two of us left. "I-I'll do it." Hyuri speaks up from her spot, still looking at the bag containing the girl that I killed. "I'll help." He contemplates, looking the girl over one, twice before nodding. "Alright, you both can come out for one day." This is all he says before moving to take the chains from our chairs and then wrapping them around both of our wrists. "Areum first, wrap you arms around my neck." I do as he says, not missing his soft brown eyes. His hands grope my ass and support me all the way into his bedroom. The sunlight irritates my eyes and this forces me to nuzzle my face into his neck. I can already feel him smirking. "Can I trust you to shower alone without trying anything? I don't have to do it for you baby, but I gladly will if you want me to." He turns in the black light for his room so that I can look at him appropriately. "I can do it but I need you to help me." I've been chained up in a red room for almost a week. There's no way I could stand up and do anything like that in my own so for now, I'm going to let myself depend on him. He carries me into a room designated simply for a shower and it's about the same size of a regular room. There's a rain shower head already turned on. I guess he was about to go in after the game. "Can't get enough of me?" He wets his lips with his pink tongue. "Don't worry, I'm saving that for the other one. You're safe for now." He presses his body against mine, the only one wearing clothes. I'm forced against the shower wall. "Maybe I don't want to be safe." He's dead silent for minute, analyzing my eyes and do my best to keep a straight face.   •| intermission |• The only way to escape a psychopath is to participate in his game. Make him trust you. Let him have you. Then when he least expects it... Kill or be killed. •| intermission |•   "What are you doing..." He trails off, letting me know that this question is rhetorical. I give an answer anyway by pressing my lips against his, the chains probably digging into the skin of the back of his neck. I can feel him giving himself to me, not caring the the water we're positioned under is ruining his clothes and just getting colder. He moans into the kiss as I feel the fabric of his jeans rutting against my clit, moving my body rhythmically. "Agust-ah, don't stop." I throw my head back as a sign of submission, letting him latch his lips onto me. Then his teeth. "Is this your way of agreeing to be my bitch?" His voice rasps harshly in my ear as he keeps thrusting his knee up and down my vagina, getting me closer to my peak. "Do you want my cock? The same way I gave it to when when I took your virginity?" Shock courses through my veins but I don't impulsively ask him questions. I know exactly what he's talking about. The day after I snuck into Jimin's room, o was suspicious that the guy I was really on top of wasn't him but things worked out between Jimin and I do I didn't say anything. Look where that got me. "Yes, ah~" I gasp out. "I want to be your bitch."   And the moans and lies collide so well that he can't even tell them apart.       "Listen to me," Yoongi doesn't bother to grab a condom although I know he keeps them in all of the rooms. It's okay, every female idol is on birth control right before debut. No exceptions. "If you're playing me, I will end you. I won't care and it won't at all matter how much I love you. I will kill you, Areum. Then I'll hang your fucking body up with your dead parents, after fucking it for a few days. It won't be a big deal. I fucked them both, ass and vagina after I killed them. You think I won't do it to you?" His words make me sick. They make me hate him. I want to kill him and after what he's done to us, I will. For now, I keep moaning as he fucks me against the shower wall with water splashing all around us. "You're is damn tight. I fucking love it." He groans until I feel him releasing into me, and then a thin line of him running down my thigh. He's out of breath (I am not) but Yoongi speaks up anyway. "I'll make you a deal, princess." He makes me stand on my own and keeps his hands on either side of my head. "Your week isn't over yet. If you can get me to... stop being heartless. If you can get me to fall in love with you... if you can fix me," He starts tearing up, I can tell that it's not water beating onto his complexion from the shower head. "I won't kill you." I contemplate his proposition although I know that he's decided for me. I don't get a choice in this. I have to find Min Yoongi's heart... Or he's going to kill me. ***** Jealous ***** Chapter Twenty-Three : Jealous • 2017 • My name is Min Yoongi and my baby girl is a natural at being insane.     It's one of those days. I let the girls come out of the torture room after being absent for three days. I couldn't be around after the guys notice a bloodstain on my jacket last time. I played it off as ketchup but it wasn't easy. This is just one of those days where you can hear the downpour of rain from inside the apartment walls. "Faster, Daddy." Hyuri pants beneath me, her walls tightening. This signals that she's getting close. "Wrap your legs around my waist." I grip my teeth and feel my cock stop leaking precum only to let a spray of my cum shoot into her. Hyuri squeals at the sudden feeling but I feel her letting her liquid release soon as well. Areum is resting after getting punished last night. That's why I'm here. That's the only reason I settled for her. I had to get off and this one was around at the right time. Simple as that. As soon as I finish I get off of the panting girl and grab some rope. "I need to go back home for some more time than usual so you're going back into the room. I'll be gone for long enough that you're not starved though." It's been more than a week. It's been more than two, and three but Min Areum has managed to talk herself into getting more time. It's not helping. Just postponing her inevitable death. Nothing anyone can say, will ever change me. It's the way that I was meant to be but not born as. Hyuri has far learned now to not struggle when I'm binding her up, and as a reward I only do her arms and ankles. Areum on the other hand, although she's the first one too be broken in, has not learned this lesson. Which means she in a full body bind. Hyuri yelps as I roughly latch my lips onto her, swallowing up the cute sound but I'm pretending this girl I'm hovering over is Areum. I can't enjoy fucking anything unless it's her. I love her. "Hyuri, will you answer a question for me?" I stare into her wide and bewildered brown eyes. "Of course I will, daddy." I never even asked her to call me anything. I didn't care if she called me but Yoongi, actually I'd quite prefer it. She's just desperate and I can hardly get hard enough for her unless I'm thinking of the other girl. "Will you..." I pretend that I'm afraid and shy, forcing her to crave this question and guaranteeing an instant yes. "Never mind, I don't think I can handle asking you this." "Wait! Please say it. I won't regret it or anything. You can say it." But I don't love her, and she's nothing but a toy. Instead I throw her over my shoulder and carry her to the room, illuminated by red lights and attach a chain from the ground to her leg. I leave her there on the ground, starring at me in wonder and I just close the heavy steel door in her face.   •| intermission |• "Do you love me?" "That's not a safe question, but yes." I answered this, protecting my heart until the end. •| intermission |•   Hyuri cries as I walk toward the only room I let Areum roam in for now. It's safe to say that she's more of a roommate now than a hostage. "You hungry?" She plainly asks, getting up from her spot at the table and walking to the pantry. I can't help but admire her curves as she's wearing nothing but a shirt of mine, her bare ass for me to see. "A little." My eyes rake over her exposed clit and I can feel my mouth watering, my member hardening once again. "Have you ever given an ice cream blowjob?" I ask, as she's coincidentally bent over for me to put my hands on her hips and being her ass to my clothed pelvis. I know she hasn't. I start pushing her back and forth so that she's hitting my hard member with her clit. "N-no..." Areum moans towards the end of her answer and I can feel her wetness and the need to lick it all up. Instead of following that instinct, I stretch over and grab a carton of ice cream from the freezer. "Hope mint chocolate is cool." She stands up and watches me getting a spoon and nods. I can help but admire how perfect she looks in my clothes, blue and black tips of her hair still drying. Her comeback color of purple has faded to a dark blue and eventually it'll be black like the rest of her waist length ringlets. "How do I..." She looks away, shyly. "Just put a scoop in your mouth and suck. Every time you run out in your mouth, pop another scoop in." I explain, hoping it's enough instruction and hoping she easily pulls this off. Areum doesn't look completely sold on the idea, but I'm aware that she knows she doesn't have a choice anyway. "I don't expect your first time doing this to be perfect or anything. Just do your best," I assure her, unbuttoning my jeans and taking my cock out to pump myself a few times. By now, I'm fully hard. "I'll guide you through it, only if you want." She nods and doesn't waste anymore time getting to her knees. "Just make me feel good, and I'll reward you." My hands stroke through her long hair that I'm glad she never cut. I watch her take the spoon from my hands and prepare herself. I know she's never liked ice cream, never liking the temperature so her tongue isn't used to it when it's in her mouth. She wastes no time swallowing the entirety of my cock, gagging a bit. "Slow down." And it's so cold in her hot mouth. There's ice cream everywhere. It's beautifully messy and disgustingly erotic. The temperature fucks with me for a minute, throws me for a loop, because it's warm then it's cold. Then it's warm again because he swallowing it all. "Another scoop, babygirl." She says the carton next to her, to avoid us passing it back and fourth. "Oh, shit Min." My hips instinctively buck, nailing her in the back of her throat. She seems to be enjoying it enough or at least wants to live bad enough to perform well. Her dark brown eyes meet mine and they hold this look of pure sin. She's calling me daddy with her eyes. She's moaning with her eyes. Her eyes hold all of the power just like her moth is now holding all of my cum. "Fuck," I silently groan, fucking into her mouth. "I know what I had to do now, Areum." I'm reeling from possibly the best blowjob I've ever received when my senses re-sharpen and I'm thrown off of my cloud nine. "Let's go to the red room." ***** Breast ***** Chapter Twenty-Four : Breast • 2017 • My name is Areum. I don't know what I'm becoming but I know, for sure, that Min Yoongi is making me insane just like him.   My plan is slightly backfiring. It's the ultimate goal to get out of this apartment. I don't care how sound proof it is, there's got to be someone that can help me. It doesn't matter if I kill Yoongi in the process. He's the one that taught me to kill... or be killed. "Ah!" I squeal in pain when he gives my left nipple a particularly harsh suck. I try not to complain about it though, knowing he'll just double it out of spite. "I'm sorry." He kisses me on the afflicted area. It's different now. I think I might be succeeding in his stupid challenge of finding his heart, of teaching him how to love someone. My hands bury in his white locks and I turn my fake on. "It's okay," He looks up to see my eyes and I fill them with as much genuine feeling as possible. "I love you." He smiles at me and this almost feels real for a moment. The red room is less hellish, with the bodies all gone it's just the two of us and I'm too focused on my escape to continue mourning. "D-daddy, pay attention to me." Hyuri whines from her chained up position across the room. "I've told you to shut the fuck up like ten times!" A flash of light bouncing in the corner of my eye indicates that he's had it with the whining naked girl and has pulled his notorious favorite knife on her. The psychopath stalks over to her an glares before snapping his fingers at me without a look. "Come." It's a simple command that you'd give to a dog. Disgustingly degrading, and I hate it and him for it. "Kim Hyuri, you're becoming less valuable to me. You were just around when I needed to get off and the princess wasn't feeling it. I couldn't possibly think of raping my princess," I stay on my knees which works out because he's becoming accustomed to petting my head. "Areum," He says sternly and savoring the look he gets back from me. “Have you noticed that Yuri-ah has bigger breasts than you?" I don't get a chance to answer the question because he's steering this 'conversation' in his own favor. "I'd hate for her to feel like she's in competition in her own home." The way he refers to his hostage house as my home makes me sick. "Maybe we should just... cut your boobs off Hyuri." That's when she starts screaming. No, it's closer to her whining and begging him even offering sexual favors to get herself out of this situation. I know that he's set on this gruesome idea. Yoongi will love every second of ripping my friend's chest apart. I'll probably throw up and look away. "Daddy, you would really do that to me? You love my chest." Tears are streaking her face. "No, you're wrong. I would do that to you. I like tits but I hate you. I hate how a little attention from me has made you insubordinate. I can't stand the thought of fucking your loose hole anymore." He spits harshly at her, only resulting in her receiving my pity and him receiving her tears. "Maybe I won't do that to you anyway." I can tell he loves he look of relief that crosses our expressions. Her tears just barely stop and my heart stops thumping so violently. "Areum is going to do it."     •| intermission |• I know it's not anyone's fault that she ended up in this situation and it's not anyone's fault that I did. I can't blame her for it. I can't punish her for it. But since it comes down to me or her? It's going to be me and that's the end of it. •| intermission |•     Hyuri doesn't lose her look of relief. In fact, it gets a bit arrogant although her tears don't stop. It's one thing I've never liked about my band mate. She's too cocky for her own good. She's nothing but a young blood. "Agust, please don't make me do something like this." I can feel my own chest hurting just from thinking about it. Hyuri doesn't deserve this. "I've made you do everything I wanted to see. Areum, baby, this is the last thing I want. I want you to torture somebody that you love." He's trying to break me, mentally and I'm letting him. I've hated every moment I've spent in this apartment. I hate him. Yoongi forces the black knife into my hands and gives me a look that says I'll regret not listening to him. He crouches behind me and rests his hands on my shoulders. "It's easy. Remember when you shot Seulgi? This is just doing the same thing, just takes a bit longer." He pats my hand and shuffled me a bit closer to Hyuri's laying down form. "There are even any bones in this part. Should cut like butter." I feel sick. Sick in every way. I can't believe I'm about to put a friend through this agony to save my own ass. I've lost the right to ever be respected. Yet, I still find myself gently lifting her left one up. I find myself taking his advice of blocking out the screams of your victims. It makes the so much easier. "Lift the knife to the base of where it starts. Underneath..." He instructs me, making sure that if I'm going through with it; I'll at least do it right. "You can either take a nice clean cut, make it quick, or you can saw it off slowly." I choose the latter, actually taking my time. Hyuri screams when a thin line of blood runs across her stomach and pools into her navel. "Min-min, stop!" Now she's really screaming and I put the knife down out of distraction. "I can't concentrate on it." I whisper. Yoongi looks at me in shock, not really believing that I'd make it this far so fast. "I'll fix it." When he says fix it, I picture Ah-yeong's mouth all sewn up with bloody white threads meeting on her lips but he doesn't go that far. Instead he settles for stuffing something, a cloth or a sock, in her mouth. Her pained sounds are muffled for now, and this allows me to continue sawing. Not long am I finally holding a bloody mass of disgusting, and oozing flesh that was once attached to my friend. It's more messy than I thought it would be and I don't know if I can stomach taking off the next one. Her body is covered in the fluids from the violating I just ensued upon her. I have to move on to the next one. Finish the job. There's nothing but pain in her eyes, that and betrayal; as if to ask me how I could do something like this to her. It's easy. Really, when you think about it. Just be heartless. ***** Cellophane ***** Chapter Twenty-Five : Cellophane • 2017 • My name is Min Yoongi and maybe I can find a way to love Areum. Maybe I can live without putting her through this much pain.     "She's dead," I mumble to Areum; who's trying to fall asleep on my bed. "She bleed to death about an hour ago." Areum has grown so used to having one of her wrist tied to a bed post, for security purposes, that she's not even struggling anymore. Thinking about it, there are a lot of new things blossoming in her personality lately. I haven't seen any tears, heard any screams, or seen any hesitation when she killed her friend in there. When we're together, we're having sex. It's not like I'm raping her anymore. She wants it. She just nods at the news of her friend's death and then falls back asleep, but it's short lived. "Min, are you okay?" I crawl into bed and place a hand on her cheek. "Yes, I'm fine." And she looks genuine so I don't push her on the subject. Instead, I give her a gentle kiss but it's her that deepens it. "Untie me." I know where this is going so I obey her just this once. It's like she's turned into a completely new person. She's on top of me before I can even blink. This girl was nothing more than a paper doll wrapped in cellophane, covered in pain when I brought her here. I brought her here to kill her. I'm letting my hands run over the expanse of her body, my lips doing the same. "This wasn't part of the plan." I whine. She barely answers me while taking off my clothes and touching my erected shaft. "What?" It's all happening too fast or not fast enough. "I didn't want to love you, Areum." It's anything she was expecting me to say this.she already knew where I was going, as I thrust into her and let her take over. I groan at the girl bouncing on me, but still looking over me in concern. "But I love you so much. I could never hurt you anymore. I need you to," She reaches to the bedside and grabs me a few tissues. "Stay with me."   •| intermission |• He should've seen this coming. I was cellophane, weak and transparent and soft. He turned me into obsidian, strong and indestructible. It started when he forced me to become heartless like him. •| intermission |•     "Areum..." He whispers, holding my hips so that I'm still riding him. "Answer me!" This is a sick love between us. It's monstrous and it's dirty. It's wrong. There are more tears leaking from his eyes. I made him weak. His weakness is my ticket out of here. I move my hand towards the bedside as if I'm grabbing more tissues for him, but my hand grabs the knife I planted while he was in the incineration room. "Fuck," Yoongi groans coming up on his orgasm. I still haven't answered his question formed as a statement. He's forcing me down harder and digging his nails into the flesh of my hips. I don't make my move until I feel that familiar sensation of him releasing inside of me. That's it. I don't dottle around either. Before he can even take a breath my hand; that he so foolishly agreed to untie id in his hair and my dominant hand is holding the knife to his neck. The edge of the blade just barely grazes his Adam's apple and there's a thin line of blood falling across his chest from that spot. "Didn't even see it coming." He tries his best to catch his breath but I'm too harsh. "Do you have any idea what you've done to me?" A lone tear falls down my cheek but that's the last of them. "Adjectives that describe me included sick things. I want you to list them all and I might spare your life. Go." Yoongi takes a moment to process exactly what I'm doing to him. "Orphan." He starts, it's insulting really. "Unpredictable." He describes the position we've found ourselves in, his cock still inside of me and a blade pressed against his skin. "You're beautiful." "Stop flattering me and keep listing." "Is that anyway to speak with your daddy?" He continues as I say when I give his neck another slight graze, drawing more blood. "Tough." I give him a tsk, but he keeps listing. "Broken." "Don't be cliché. Get serious." He has to think for a moment, as if he can't recount what he's done to me or something. "Tragic. Simple. You're... tired." I roll my eyes although he's right. Figuratively, I haven't had mental or emotional ref but I haven't slept either. "Would you like it if I cut your nipples off? I don't think you'd enjoy the way it feels. Ask Hyuri. Oh, wait! You can't." "Who's fault is that?" "It's yours. That wouldn't have happened if you'd just..." But really I didn't have to do that to her. There were other other alternatives. If I hadn't, he would've. Is it better having something like that done to you by a friend. "I don't have the heart to kill you like this." "The heart or the balls?" He gets another tsk from me. The comfort I felt around him, in the beginning of it all and now we're at the end. I feel nothing, not even that happiness that he caused me. When he smiled at me, it was the greatest thing I'd ever experienced. I'm smiling at him now. "Maybe being tied up here and starving to death will suit you better?" Tears are welled up in his eyes. "That's not your style." A tear adorns his pale skin and I just want to know what reduced this psychopath to this pathetic mess beneath me. What snapped? "I don't understand why you're doing this. You won. I love you." "You always felt that way. I felt that way too, but it didn't stop you from killing my friends and family. It didn't stop you from having the desire to break me." I don't know what's snapping in me as well but I can't stop myself from cutting the knife deep into his throat. I just don't have the guts to cut fatally so I can only hope this truly gets the job done. "You wanted me to feel like this." His body is convulsing but something seems off by his actions. "I want to be immune to other people's pain as well." I smile sickly. Watching him like this, on the brink of death, is more satisfying than anything.     "I want to be just like you, Agust D." ***** Finale ***** Last chapter.     Chapter Twenty-Six : Finale • 2017 •     My name is Park Jimin and just when things get worse, her smile brightens up the darkest hour. I love her.         "Did I just watch you earn your first Daesang award?" I mumble into her ear, feeling the tears start spilling over the edges of my eyes and taking over my vision. She doesn't answer now that we're backstage. Areum is back to herself. She's sullen, and emotionless. It's a contrast to her stage face, full of aegyo. "I know you're not going to say anything but I have lots to say. Areum, I'm so proud of you." I have to whisper this praise to her. "I love you so much." My tears are destructive against her sequined dress but when she goes back out, no one will have noticed. It's another five minutes before she hears her stage name come back out. "Mina," It stands for Min Areum, she once told me and explained the meaning of it to me. I remember that pain she felt recounting him. She debuted as a solo artist three years after police tore apart Yoongi's apartment, discovering things that I couldn't have possible imagined in my hyung's possession. Areum was hysterical afterwards. She mumbled things about Yoongi being dead in the master bedroom. Something about being guilty over killing him. We never found a body though.       •| intermission |• I have absolutely nothing to say about what I've been through and the pain I experienced through it. Nothing. •| intermission |•       "For her hit single, 'The Last,' Mina wins for best breakout artist of the year." It's deafening. Not really the crowd screaming for me but it's deafening hearing my stage name called over the screams. That's my level. I walk out on stage, completely transforming. And they all love my smile, despite the lies behind it. There's an acceptance speech prewritten for me and all of those countless hours of memorizing it are for nothing. Everyone sees it. That red dot that starts on my chest, then ends up on my forehead. There are five hundred bodyguards here and not one of them could stop him. I knew it was coming. He's about to shoot me. I regret not checking to make sure Min Yoongi was completely dead. It's not long before I'm bleeding on the stage. It's over.   The game is over. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!