Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/477979.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Supernatural_RPF
  Relationship:
      Jensen_Ackles/Jared_Padalecki, Jared_Padalecki/Original_Male_Character
  Character:
      Jensen_Ackles, Jared_Padalecki, Chad_Michael_Murray
  Additional Tags:
      Alternate_Universe_-_High_School, Younger!Jensen
  Stats:
      Published: 2011-10-16 Chapters: 3/3 Words: 24143
****** This Boy I Know ******
by spiders_stars
Summary
     As far back as Jensen could remember, he’d been in love with his
     straight best friend Jared. When Jared turns out to be not-so-
     straight and not in love with Jensen in return? That’s just a little
     too much for Jensen to handle.
***** Chapter 1 *****
The sound of plastic connecting hard with cement was the only warning Jensen
got before cool, dark foamy liquid was splashing up over his khakis,
undoubtedly instantly staining the material with the foul stench of alcohol.
He’d have to do his own laundry tomorrow if he wanted to keep his parents from
finding out that he wasn’t hanging out with his best friend like he’d said he
was. Well, he would be hanging out with him, but just not in the boy’s bedroom
watching movies or playing video games.
Jensen was pretty sure his parents were incredibly naive. Which he found a
little remarkable considering they’d lived through Josh’s high school years.
Somehow they never seemed to realize his best friend wasn’t the let’s stay in
and play X-Box type. Then again, when it came to Jared Padalecki, that amazing
best friend of Jensen’s, his parents only ever saw sunshine and halos. Somehow
Jared had both his own parents and Jensen’s parents fooled into thinking he was
the perfect little angel.
Maybe because he was the youngest boy in two decades to make Varsity
Quarterback, something of a legend already. Or maybe because he always minded
his P’s and Q’s, along with the yes ma’am’s and let me hold the door for you,
Mrs. Ackles. Or maybe it was just those damn dimples he got whenever he smiled,
which were something of a force all their own. Actually, Jensen was of the
belief that Jared was just kind of perfect in general because well, he was.
Jared Padalecki was Jensen’s gorgeous, breathtaking, one hundred percent
perfect life-long best friend. And Jensen was completely head over heels in
love with him. Jared also happened to be the straightest person alive and was
dating head cheerleader Sandy McCoy, because of course his perfect little life
would have to include a perfect little girlfriend.
Which likely didn’t matter, considering Jared was a summer away from being a
Senior, a month shy of eighteen, king of the world so to speak. Jensen was just
a barely fifteen year old soon-to-be-sophomore who’d been Jared’s tag along
side kick from the day he was born. Even if Jared was magically gay, he’d never
be interested in someone like Jensen. So Jensen watched and pined and savored
every moment Jared spent with him alone and Jared just kept... being perfect.
Currently, Jensen was doing what he did best. Which was hunting Jared down
amongst the crowd of crazy high-schoolers that were celebrating the end of the
school year. Tomorrow Jared was flying to L.A. to spend the summer with his
brother and Jensen was miserable about the idea. As far back as he could
remember summers had meant no homework, long sunny days laying out on Jared’s
trampoline or splashing in the neighborhood public pool, cookies made by either
of their mothers. Most importantly though, it was just Jared and him. Sometimes
Sandy but she had her own friends to lay out and tan with.
Jensen had no idea what he would do without Jared for three whole months. At
the moment though he was more focused on trying to find Jared at all.
“Heya Jenny!” Chad’s call was loud enough to be heard over the milling crowd
and Jensen flinched, bracing himself. Moments later the boy was throwing arms
around his shoulders and attempting to jump on his back. “Carry me!”
“Ugh. Get off me, you dick,” Jensen grunted, rolling his shoulders back to try
and shake Chad off even as he stumbled forward to keep from falling. “Don’t you
have something really douchey to be doing?”
“You need better comebacks,” Chad scoffed and jumped down, bumping into
Jensen’s side. “Whatcha doin’ here, mini-man? Set to stalk your lover boy?”
Jensen flushed and ducked his head down, pursing his lips in annoyance.
Somewhere along the line Jared had picked up Chad as a friend and consequently,
Jensen had befriended the boy as well. Only Chad seemed to somehow know Jensen
in a creepy, all-too-wise way and that knowledge included his epic love for
Jared. Thankfully the boy hadn’t informed Jared of Jensen’s crush but that
didn’t mean Jensen trusted Chad to keep it silent forever.
“Leave me alone, Chad,” Jensen grumbled and readjusted his glasses. He never
felt cool enough for these kinds of parties, never had the in style clothing,
hadn’t hit a growth spurt recently enough to catch his height up with the other
kids. He was like a shrimp in a wide open ocean were all the other fish had
bright colorful spots and stripes. Or, he was exactly Jared’s opposite.
“You know Jenny, you never give me enough credit,” Chad sighed dramatically and
looped his arm through Jensen’s dragging him through the mass of bodies filling
the front hallway. “Why don’t you love me, little boy? I could be so good to
you.”
Jensen groaned and tried to squirm away as Chad landed loud smacking kisses to
his cheek. “Oh my god, I hate you! Let me go!”
“Chad? Are you giving my boy a hard time?” Jared’s warm laughter and rich voice
was pretty much the best noise Jensen had ever heard and when the boy’s hands
curled around his middle and tugged him free from Chad’s hold, Jensen sank back
into the familiar heat willingly. Of course, Jared’s hands felt impossibly
large on his thin waist and that didn’t help the fluttering in Jensen’s
ribcage.
The smirk on Chad’s lips lingered as his gaze shifted from Jensen to Jared. “Of
course not. Your boy and I were just having a friendly little chat. Haven’t
seen Sandy around tonight, Jay, something up?”
Jared shrugged and let his arms fall over Jensen’s shoulders to wrap around
under his neck, leaning heavily against Jensen’s back. Unlike Chad nearly
climbing on him, Jensen really didn’t mind Jared’s too heavy weight pressing
into him. For so many obvious reasons. “She’s probably around or whatever. I
wouldn’t know.”
Since Jensen couldn’t twist around to look at the expression on Jared’s face,
which usually helped him read between the lines of whatever Jared was saying,
Jensen watched Chad’s instead and leaned back against Jared. He loved when
Jared was like this, touchy-feely, as long as he was the person being touched.
Jared’s problem was he had this tendency to touch everyone.
Chad’s eyebrow arched which most likely meant Jared was doing his evasive,
scanning around the room to feign disinterest in the conversation thing. The
very idea of what that meant had Jensen perking up. “You two alright?” Chad
asked casually but Jensen didn’t miss the way their gazes momentarily locked.
“We broke up,” Jared said simply and stepped back from Jensen only to drop his
arm over his tense shoulders instead. “No big deal, whatever. Come on Jen, I
wanna get you wasted. Like, more wasted then the spring break bash. So drunk
you won’t even know your own name!”
Jensen stared wide eyed at Chad even as Jared dragged him, mostly willingly,
further into the house. The way Jared was calling loudly at people, slapping
their shoulders and laughing, suggested he’d already had a few drinks himself.
But Jensen would allow Jared to get him drunk because clearly, Jared needed the
drinking buddy. And there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for Jared.
~~
Everything was spinning. Or maybe just Jensen was. Regardless, things were
definitely weird and the couch Jensen sat on suddenly felt unsteady beneath
him. It seemed pretty important so Jensen turned to tell Jared but... Jared was
missing. And he wasn’t the other way when Jensen twisted rapidly to check.
“I lost my Jared,” Jensen mumbled to no one and shook his head, pushing slowly
up to his feet. He swayed dangerously for a moment but extending hands out to
either side seemed to help so he did that for a while, letting everything
stabilize.
Once he was sure the floor wasn’t about to flip out from under him and suddenly
become the ceiling, he forced himself forward a few steps. He had absolutely no
idea how many drinks he’d had, how long he’d been drinking, and just what kind
of things Jared was pouring in those damn red plastic cups. But tomorrow, when
he was hunched over the toilet and trying to heave his stomach up through his
throat, he was really not gonna love Jared so much.
Currently though, most things felt pretty good. Except the losing Jared thing.
He thought he could vaguely recall Jared mentioning something about going for a
piss but that had been a while go, sometime after the drinks started and after
Jared had ranted about how uptight Sandy apparently was. Jensen wasn’t sure he
wanted to know the specific details of their break-up, at least not when he was
drunk and couldn’t do much to help his surely hurting best friend.
Sometimes Jared might come across as a douche or something, the all-star jock
with the inflated ego, but Jensen knew him better. Jared had a heart of gold;
of course he cared if he split up with his girlfriend of the past two years. He
was just choosing to express that at the moment by getting very drunk. And
getting Jensen very drunk too.
“Hey!” Jensen grabbed the arm of the nearest blonde but it wasn’t Chad, it was
some girl, and she looked annoyed until she realized it was him. A lot of
people acted that way with him. Jared was kind of a protective, older best
friend. “Have you seen my Jared? I mean, Jared? Have you seen him?”
“I think I saw him go upstairs.” The girl nodded and pointed toward the stairs.
“You need some help, Jensen?”
“Nah, I’m good.” Jensen smiled at the girl - both of her, there seemed to be a
lot of clones in his vision - and waved before hurrying forward. “Jared! You
asshole! You’re not supposed to drink me- I mean, get me drunk,” Jensen stopped
halfway up the flight of stairs to giggle at his slurred words, shaking his
head then forcing himself on and up once more. “Don’t leave me alone drunk!
People could take advantage of me. Chad could.”
There was no sign of Jared on the top landing and Jensen scratched at his
forehead for a moment before shrugging and starting for the doors. The first
room was empty and dark, the second was a bathroom and locked, the third had a
pool table and two couples making out on top of it. Jensen snorted as he shut
the door, shaking his head and crossing the hall to the other row of doors.
Another empty bedroom. Another bedroom with the light out but this time Jensen
stopped to flick the light on, because being drunk apparently didn’t give him
special super powers. Light flooded across the room, illuminating two bodies
rolling together on the mattress. Jensen blinked at the shirtless boys. Two
boys. And heat flushed his cheeks because whoa. That wasn’t the type of thing
you walked in on all that often.
The boy on top broke away and twisted toward him, exposing the boy beneath him,
and Jensen was suddenly, completely, painfully, sober. “Jared,” he whispered,
eyes wide with shook, fingers still curled hard around the doorknob.
“Fuck, Jen, get out of here!” Jared hollered and tugged the boy he was making
out with, who Jensen had never seen before, closer.
“What about...” The boy mumbled around the kiss and Jensen just kept watching
because he couldn’t seem to stop.
“Oh, that’s just Jensen. He’s like my kid brother,” Jared said dismissively,
sliding his fingers up into the boy’s hair and holding him close. “Jen, shut
the fucking door would ya? And get the lights on your way out.”
Jensen couldn’t move, couldn’t blink, could barely even breathe. It wasn’t
supposed to be like this. Jared didn’t like boys. Because if Jared liked boys
then he would be in love with Jensen. Why wouldn’t he? They knew each other
better than anyone else in the world, they’d grown up together, and Jensen
loved Jared with everything he had.
“Come on, kid,” Chad’s voice was soft and right beside his ear, fingers curling
around his wrist to pull his grasp from the door.
Jensen stumbled back as Chad reached in the room, flicked the light off and
shut the door. No matter how many times he stared at the door things weren’t
changing and when he heard a moan that was distinctly Jared’s, the pain sliced
through his chest with startling harshness.
“Jen,” Chad whispered, ducking down to catch Jensen’s eyes. “Hey, you okay?”
Years Jensen had known Chad and he’d never heard the boy sound so concerned;
hell, he’d never heard the boy call him anything outside Jenny no matter how
often he protested. Which maybe was the final straw. Tears pricked along
Jensen’s eyes, his lower lip trembling as he met the bright blue of Chad’s
gaze. “I don’t... understand. Jared doesn’t. He doesn’t like guys.”
Chad sighed, fingers passing up through his hair then dropping to curl over
Jensen’s shoulder. “Man, Jen, it’s just a thing. You know how he is. It’s not
like he does it often. But you know, between the alcohol and breaking up with
Sandy, I’m sure he’s hurting and looking for comfort.”
Jensen let Chad guide him back down the stairs, out back, not really aware of
moving until he was dropping on the sidewalk, feet in the gutter. Chad’s words
made about as much sense as Jared tangled with that nameless dark-haired boy on
the bed and he looked over once more, trying to blink the tears away. “But,
what about me? I could comfort him.”
“Fuck. Jen, come on.” Chad groaned and grabbed Jensen’s wrist, squeezing. “You
don’t want to be his rebound hook up.”
“He doesn’t want me,” Jensen whispered, blinking down at his shoes until the
words sank in and his gaze snapped up to Chad again. “He likes boys but he
doesn’t want me. He doesn’t love me. Why doesn’t he want me like that? I could
do that. I could be his rebound. I could comfort him. Why doesn’t-” The words
caught in Jensen’s throat and swayed forward as Chad’s arms slid around him and
tugged him forward into a hard hug.
“You don’t want that, Jensen. You don’t want to be his rebound. And of course
Jared loves you. He’s a fucker, yeah, and he doesn’t deserve you, but he does
care. Just... in a different way.” Chad slid fingers through Jensen’s hair,
groaning again a moment later. “I’m gonna kill the bastard.”
Jensen sniffed, struggling to pull himself together because crying on the curb
in Chad’s arms was really, really lame. And people would see, they’d tell
Jared, and Jensen didn’t know how to explain the way his heart felt so broken.
“Why doesn’t he love me, Chad? Am I... gross or something?”
“Gross? You’re fucking kidding, right?” Chad pulled back and smirked at Jensen,
thumbing tears from under his eyes. “If you were a girl, I’d fuck you in a
heartbeat.”
A surprised laugh fell from Jensen, twisted somewhat with a half sob but well,
he was trying to pull it together. “Gee, thanks.”
“Jen?” Jared was a few steps behind them, voice curious and maybe a little
deeper than usual.
Jensen slowly glanced up at him, not really all that comforted by Jared’s kiss
swollen lips and bed ruffled hair. The boy’s cheeks were flushed and his eyes
were darker and Jensen really could have gone the rest of his life without
knowing how Jared looked when he was turned on.
“Don’t you have some nameless boy to be fucking, Jay?” Chad asked, his voice
harsh and cold as he stood and faced Jared.
Jared’s shoulders tensed, his eyes narrowing on instinct. “What’s your issue,
Chad?”
“Just not a fan of stuck up assholes is all.” Chad stepped forward, crowding
into Jared’s space and glaring up at him.
“What the fuck Chad?” Jared met the move forward, fingers curling into fists at
his sides like whenever he prepared for a fight.
Jensen quickly scrambled up from the ground and tugged at Chad’s arm, slipping
between the boys to spread them further apart. “Guys, stop. It’s- nothing. It’s
fine. Chad’s just gonna take me home Jared, so um, you can get back to
whatever.”
“Are you okay, though?” Jared grabbed his arm, dipping down to meet his gaze.
“You’ve been crying.”
“Jared?” That boy, from upstairs, was calling out to Jared from the sidewalk.
His shirt was unbuttoned and hanging open at his sides and Jensen’s heart
plummeted even further. “You said you’d only be a minute.”
“Yeah I’m coming.” Jared smiled at the boy then turned back to Jensen. “So
you’re good.”
Jensen blinked up at his best friend and took a step back, bumping into Chad’s
shoulder. “Yeah. See you around Jared.” He forced himself to turn and walk away
after that because well, Jared was just too much to deal with at the moment.
Thank god Chad was there to take him home, Jensen was pretty sure he’d never
make it on his own.
~~~
The early morning air was warm enough Jared could get away with wearing just a
t-shirt and showing off the wicked tan he’d gotten over the summer in
California. One of the few good things to come from three months away. He’d
mostly been bored; apparently laying around at the pool and living in a
bachelor pad wasn’t so cool. His brother worked a lot and wasn’t the party
animal he used to be and Jared was... lonely.
For some reason, Jensen hadn’t called at all, not even once. The night before
he’d left was kind of a weird blur but he’d remembered drinking a lot, making
Jensen drink a lot, then maybe something to do with Jensen crying and Chad
being a douche. There was also something to do with some random boy he couldn’t
remember the name of but that didn’t matter too much.
The point was, Jared had gone three months without hearing from the one person
who’d been a solid in his life outside his family for his entire life. Jared
was hurt by the entire thing, confused, more than a little unsure what had made
Jensen ignore him all of a sudden. But now it was the first day of school and
ever since Jared had gotten a car for his sixteenth birthday he’d driven Jensen
to school.
So even if Jared hadn’t heard from Jensen in the couple of days since he’d been
home, he stopped in front of his car and turned to Jensen’s house. Truthfully,
he was pretty excited about seeing Jensen. He’d really missed the kid, missed
the way he’d ramble about some book he’d watched or some History channel
program that caught his interest. For so long Jared had just been used to
Jensen being around, not having him kind of threw everything off.
When at least ten minutes passed without Jensen, which was weird enough
considering the boy was always on time for school, Jared frowned and headed
across the driveway. He’d figured if Jensen for some reason didn’t need a ride
he would have at texted but another check of his phone came up empty. So he
knocked on the Ackles’ front door instead, smiling when Donna answered.
“Jared, look at you, you must have grown another five inches over the summer.”
Donna smiled at him, stepping out onto the front step to lean up and kiss his
cheek. “I’m gonna need a step stool to do that soon.”
Jared laughed and pulled the woman forward for a hug. She was kind of like a
second mom to him really and it was just as weird not to have her around as it
was not to have Jensen. Though, for different reasons Jared couldn’t name.
“I’ll try and stop growing,” he promised Donna then stepped back, peering
curiously into the familiar front hall of the Ackles home. “What’s up with Jen?
He running late?”
Donna sighed in that way she used to when they were younger and got caught
playing in the mud in their dress clothes. Which never meant good things.
“Jensen stayed the night at Chad’s last night, where he’s been most of the
summer. I’m just not sure what’s gotten into that boy.”
A frown tugged at Jared’s lips and something pinched in his chest but he shook
it off, taking another step back. “Really? Huh. Well, I’ll just hunt him down
at school. He’s um... he’s okay, right?”
“Oh Jared, I really don’t know.” Donna sighed and gave Jared a sad smile before
patting his shoulder and turning toward the house. “Have a good day at school
honey, and if you could convince my son to ride home with you afterwards, I’d
appreciate it.”
Jared nodded and forced a smile for Donna’s sake, not wanting her to know how
concerned he was for Jensen’s sake. Chad wasn’t a bad guy but he certainly
wasn’t all pure and innocent. It was one thing for Jensen to drink when Jared
was there to look after him but who knew what kind of trouble Chad could get
Jensen into while Jared was elsewhere. The idea alone had him turning with only
a wave to Donna and half jogging to his car.
He’d find Jensen at school and make sure the kid was okay. Then he’d tear Chad
a new one for doing whatever it was he’d likely done to Jensen over the summer.
~~~
The thing about being popular was, people all tended to pretend like they knew
you. Which meant on the first day of school nearly everyone was stopping you to
say hi and ask how your summer was. As a result, it took Jared nearly ten
minutes to get just through the parking lot, which was annoying because he just
wanted to hunt down Jensen. He was secretly praying Chad hadn’t done something
to forever scar his geeky, innocent little best friend.
He spotted Chad first, standing in a small group of people and laughing on the
front lawn. Jared blew out a relieved breath, gaze sweeping around the nearby
people to spot some sign of Jensen. There was a tall boy by Chad’s side, almost
his height but not quite, with a dark leather coat and spiky brown hair, and
some girls in front of them, but no Jensen. Maybe he’d already gone to class.
Jared approached Chad from behind and greeted him with a punch to the shoulder.
“Chad, man, I’ve been looking for you. Have you seen Jen-” Jared cut off as
both boys turned and apparently, tall boy with the leather coat was Jensen. At
least, Jared was pretty sure that was Jensen. Same bright green eyes and
freckled cheeks but there were no wire frames balanced on his nose and his full
lower lip was adorned with a shiny black metal ring.
Jared’s gaze flickered quickly over the boy’s features, trying to take in and
absorb all the sudden differences. Both ears were pierced, and his eyebrow and
lip, and Jared could see dark ink just beneath the collar of the leather
jacket, crawling up Jensen’s neck like it was alive or something. The boy was
wearing an impossibly tight white shirt beneath his jacket and loose denims
that hung low enough Jared could see the top of his hipbones as his gaze
dropped down.
Holy shit. Apparently Chad had not only scarred his poor innocent little
Jensen, he’d turned him into some type of fifteen year-old twink or something.
Like a wannabe hooker. Or something else really dirty that made heat crawl
through Jared at a pace that was more than a little terrifying. “Jensen,” he
breathed in shock, forcing his gaze back up to those narrowed green eyes. “What
the hell happened to you?”
Jensen snorted a laugh that sounded not at all amused and maybe mostly annoyed
and made Jared’s stomach churn. “Gee Jared, nice to see you too.”
“Ah give him a break Jen, he spent three months in Cali. His brain is probably
smog mush or something.” Chad laughed and dropped his arm over Jensen’s
shoulder, tugging him flush to his side. “Can we help you with something, Jared
or would you just like to stare for a while? I’m sure Jensen would love putting
on some type of show for you.”
“As if,” Jensen huffed, rolling his eyes and leaning just slightly into Chad’s
side. “I have a million better things to do with my day.”
Jared’s mouth opened, closed, opened and stayed that way for a while. He felt a
little like he’d just been tackled by a three hundred pound line backer or
something. This was Jensen, the boy Jared had grown up with, the one who’d read
the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy by the time he was ten and had spent weeks
on end making Jared pretend to be Hobbits traveling through Middle Earth to
destroy some powerful magic ring. Only he wasn’t, he was this Jensen, with
piercings and some crazy ass tattoo, and a look that held something a lot like
anger and annoyance.
All the pieces weren’t adding up in Jared’s mind but he forced words to come
back because Chad was starting to tug Jensen away, toward the school, and Jared
needed to figure shit out before it was too late. His hand snapped out and
grabbed Jensen’s arm, effectively stopping the boy in place. “What’s going on?
What’s happened to you?”
Jensen turned slowly toward him, looking pointedly down at Jared’s hand curled
around his forearm then back up. “Like you even fucking care, Jared.” Jensen’s
words were nearly a hissed and he reached out with his free hand, peeling
Jared’s grasp from him. “Don’t you have some cheerleader to fuck or something?”
“But, Jen-”
“Oh and Jared?” Jensen interrupted him swiftly, turning to face him and taking
a step closer. He was still shorter then Jared but he’d definitely grown over
the summer, using the height to his advantage as he glared up at Jared. “Touch
me again and I’ll fuckin’ punch you, got it?”
“What the fuck,” Jared gasped as he stumbled back a step, rubbing at his chest
as if Jensen had shoved him. He hadn’t, he hadn’t laid a finger on Jared, but
the force of his words was like a physical blow that left Jared feeling dizzy
and a little sick.
He watched as Jensen shot him a final glare then turned, stalking off for the
school building, Chad lingering a beat longer before jogging after him. Jared
was rooted to the spot, more confused then he’d been that morning when Jensen
hadn’t turned up, and a little scared for the first time that summer that he’d
really, truly, lost the best friend he’d ever had. And he wasn’t even sure why.
~~
“Oh my god,” Jensen whispered, pacing across the classroom as Chad shut the
door and dropped heavily back against it with a laugh.
“Dude, that was fucking incredible.” Chad slapped his hand on the door. When
Jensen turned back to him, he wasn’t all that surprised to see him grinning.
“You sure put the smug bastard in his place.”
Jensen frowned and rubbed along his neck. He was trying not to scratch,
everyone told him not to, but the damn thing kept tingling all weird. And well,
it was better to focus on that then the look that had been on Jared’s face a
few minutes before. “He... I think I really hurt him, Chad. He looked shocked
and hurt.”
“And you shouldn’t care,” Chad pointed out, shoving off the door and crossing
to him. “You were hurt, Jensen, you were fucking crying and what did he do?”
“He came out to see if I was okay,” Jensen whispered and ducked his head down.
They’d had this argument a million times over the summer, they’d replayed the
entire scene over and over to the point it only barely hurt to think of now.
Just that small little pinch in his heart that Jensen thought might always be
there. “He did come after me.”
“And even though you clearly weren’t, he still ditched you to hook up with some
random guy. Come on, Jen, I thought we were getting past this. You’re not that
same kid and Jared can go find himself a different sidekick to tag along at his
asshole heels.”
Jensen’s lips twitched in a smile as he leaned into Chad’s arm hooking over his
shoulder. “That doesn’t even make sense,” he muttered and punched Chad’s side
lightly. He didn’t tell Chad how much he missed Jared, how he really hadn’t
minded being the tag-along sidekick, because there was never anything quite
like Jared’s smile when it was aimed at him alone. No one could make him feel
like Jared did, nothing else would compare - he knew, because he’d tried all
summer to find that feeling with each piercing, each needle of ink to his skin,
each drink of alcohol.
The only thing he hadn’t tried was hooking up with someone else, not that Chad
hadn’t encouraged him, but it was a line he just couldn’t get himself to cross.
Maybe soon though. Now that Jared was back, now that Jensen would see him in
the halls and in classrooms, it wouldn’t be long before it would become too
much. Jared would probably get himself a new girlfriend soon, hopefully not a
boyfriend, Jensen didn’t think he could handle that at all. So Jared would
continue his perfect life and reaffirm what Jensen knew, that he didn’t want
Jensen. And maybe then Jensen would finally be ready to have his own style of a
hook up.
“Come on, let’s ditch first hour and go smoke under the bleachers.” Chad
dragged him out of the classroom once more. And Jensen tagged along because he
was good at that, and at least Chad never made him feel like his heart was
being smashed into a million little pieces.
~~~
No matter how much Jared searched throughout the day for Jensen and Chad, he
couldn’t seem to track the boys down again. Last year, when Jensen had been a
nervous freshman in a brand new school, Jared had walked with him to every
class for the first week. Now it seemed like Jensen knew the school better than
Jared did, either that or he wasn’t even there because Jared was sure he’d
searched down every hallway.
He didn’t even know what classes Jensen had, which felt so weird. And they
didn’t eat lunch together like they had every day the year before. People had
always been nice to Jensen he thought, and maybe a lot of that had to do with
Jared being so popular, but it wasn’t like the kid wasn’t equally awesome. He
was just a bit of a geek too.
Jared ate lunch with most of the team and tried to scan every face in the
cafeteria but wherever Jensen and his new BFF were, it wasn’t there. And what
the fuck was with that anyway? What had Chad said to get Jensen to turn into
this, crazy punk, wannabe bad ass kid? What else had Chad convinced Jensen to
do? Was Jensen’s life in danger?
Of course it was. Chad was crazy. For all Jared knew, Jensen had been
brainwashed or something. And okay, that was probably ridiculous to think but
Chad wasn’t stupid, he was like an evil mastermind. He was probably getting
Jensen to rob banks with him on the weekends or something.
“Padalecki, get your ass on the field!” Coach Beaver called from across the
field and Jared huffed, clutching his helmet tighter and half jogging on to the
field.
At least practice would give him something else to think about for a while. He
was a bit worn out from worrying about Jensen all day and as much as he wanted
to just talk to the boy and figure things out, he’d take the distraction of
familiar plays and miles of grass beneath his cleats.
Thinking that was probably the reason everything got all screwed up again.
Because Jared’s gaze was caught by the sun hitting a flash of metal and he
glanced up at the top row of bleachers as he continued his slow jog. And there
was Jensen, with Chad, leaning back against the top rail. This time he wasn’t
wearing his leather jacket. The tight white shirt he wore was rucked up
slightly, molding along his skin, but Jared was caught more on the dark tribal
marks of the tattoo that were curling out just under the cut off sleeve.
Jared tripped on his shoes and stumbled a moment, barely managing to straighten
himself before he face planted. With the sun beating down on him, Jensen’s head
tipped back to soak in the heat or something, his hips slightly jutted out and
suggestive, it was the fucking hottest thing Jared had ever seen. And Jared
learned exactly why getting a hard-on with an athletic cup was never a good
idea.
Then, as Jared watched, Jensen lifted his hand and brought a cigarette to his
mouth and that time he came even closer to face planting. Jensen. Smoking.
Smoking. That was about enough for Jared. He was going to murder Chad for
ruining Jensen’s sweet little pureness. Except maybe not for the tattoo and
piercing thing because well, that was hot.
Ignoring the bellowing call of his Coach Jared turned and sprinted to the
bleachers, not in the least bit slowed by the padding he wore. He’d gotten
adjusted to the football attire and he took the steps of the bleachers two at a
time, not stopping until he was right in front of Jensen. Reaching out he
snatched the cigarette from the boy’s fingers and dropped it, toeing it out
easily.
“What the fuck is your issue?” Jared spat, narrowing his eyes first at Chad
then back at Jensen.
“My issue?” Jensen’s eyebrows rose, the black bar lifting with it, and pushed
off the back of the stands. “What did I say about touching me, asshole?”
Jared’s brows pulled together in confusion, his lips shifting down in a deep
frown. “Why are you so angry with me? What has Chad done to you?”
“Me? You douche-”
“Chad has nothing to do with this,” Jensen swiftly interrupted, pushing forward
into Jared’s space like he had that morning. “Chad has been the one to support
me, be with me, the entire summer. You didn’t even call. You don’t even care.
So don’t get all up in my face like you have any right to be protective of me.”
Jared’s jaw dropped as he stared down at Jensen, shocked by his words. He’d
never thought he was the one behind Jensen’s whole, meltdown or whatever. Why
would he be behind it? What could he have done? “I don’t understand.”
“Yeah, Jared, that’s the point. You never do.” Jensen rolled his eyes and
brushed hard past him, knocking into his shoulder and starting down the steps.
Jared spun, blinking rapidly a few times to clear his vision and the
surprising, dizzying blur. “Jen, wait, come on.”
“Stop calling me that, Jared, it’s a nickname only reserved for friends,”
Jensen spoke over his shoulder, pausing halfway down the steps. “Chad? You
coming?”
“Yeah, Jen, I am.” Chad shot Jared a smirk and flicked his own cigarette over
the back of the steps, jogging down to catch up with Jensen and finish their
journey down the steps.
Jared was left staring once more as Jensen and Chad walked off. That sinking in
his heart wasn’t stopping and Jared was starting to get a bad feeling about the
entire thing.
~~
“Jensen, I need you to run this over to Sherri,” Donna called from down the
hall, clattering something in the kitchen a moment later.
Jensen, who was halfway to the safety of his bedroom, froze. The very prospect
of going over to the Padalecki’s for any reason had Jensen’s stomach rolling
unpleasantly. For the last week he’d been dodging Jared left and right at
school. Sometimes he’d look up, catch Jared’s eyes on him, but he always turned
away before anything could happen.
The last thing he needed was Jared pretending he really gave a damn, like he
ever really did. Because, if he had, then he would have called over the summer.
He wouldn’t have ditched Jensen at the party. He never would have looked at any
boy but Jensen.
“Jensen? Do you hear me?” Donna called once more and sighed, stepping to the
entry way of the kitchen and peering down at him. It was that mom look he’d
been getting all summer. Jensen supposed he was just lucky they hadn’t seen his
tattoos yet. “I said I need you to take this dish over to Sherri’s.”
“I was going to Chad’s.” Jensen shrugged, taking a step back from the offered
dish.
“You’re over there all the time. I think you can spend a night away from Chad,”
Donna sighed and shook her head. “Maybe you should spend some time with Jared.
He was gone all summer and he used to be such a good influence on you.”
Jensen eyed his mother, knowing that arguing wasn’t really going to get him
very far. The last thing he wanted was another lecture about how he was
throwing his life away. Apparently his parents seemed to think a couple of
piercings meant he was tumbling head over heels down the dark side or
something.
“You don’t know Jared like you think you do, mom,” Jensen said quietly, meeting
his mom’s gaze as he took the dish and turned. He’d rather just drop off the
dish with Sherri and book it. The last thing he needed was some kind of
encounter with Jared. Especially since Chad wasn’t even there to back him up.
Before Donna could say anything more Jensen nearly stormed from the house,
slamming the door behind him and jumping over the row of flowers that separated
their yards. He kept his gaze down as he walked up the familiar walkway,
clutching the dish tight in his fingers and finally jamming his elbow into the
doorbell. Any other day, a few months before, and Jensen just would have walked
in.
The door opened and Jensen stared down at familiar white tennis shoes before
blowing out a painful, slow breath. Why couldn’t he be out with one of his
perfect cheerleaders or slut-like boy toys?
“Jen... sen,” Jared’s tone was definitely laced with shock, probably because
Jensen had been like a skittish mouse around Jared all week. “Um, hey. How’s it
going?”
Jensen looked up, watching as Jared rested his hip against the door and
considered him. “Fine. My mom said this is your mom’s.” Jensen held the dish
out, arching his brow when Jared just continued to stare. “Wearing your cups a
little tight lately Jared? That means fuckin’ take the dish.”
“God, you’re bitchy,” Jared huffed, reaching out to take the dish and pull it
close. “Come on in, hang out a while.”
“I’d rather not.” Jensen stepped back, forcing himself to turn because well,
Jared just looked too damn hot leaning all casual against the door like a porn
star or something else Chad would say. Jensen was still learning those terms.
“Jensen, come on,” Jared sighed and it sounded weary, worn out, like this whole
thing was making him feel... awful.
Which Jensen couldn’t really wrap his mind around. Because how could Jared
really care if he’d been so quick to dismiss Jensen months before? All summer
long, not a single word, it had been a pretty clear message to Jensen. “What is
it you wan,t Jared? Because I’m not really up for being your geeky little
sidekick anymore. You miss having someone tagging along that makes you look
better? Not getting laid as easily without your poor, helpless, geeky little
shadow?”
“Jesus fuck Jensen, is that really what you think? Is that how you think I saw
you?” Jared dragged his fingers up through his hair and Jensen watched it
flutter back into place. It was longer, weirdly more golden like the California
sun had brightened the locks somehow. It was a little painful to watch really.
“You’re my best friend.”
“Oh really? Is that what I am?” Jensen snorted a painfully harsh laugh and
shook his head. “So, I’m the best friend that you’re just okay ditching even
when you know I’m upset? I’m the best friend you got drunk then left alone to
go hook up with some random guy you probably can’t even name now? I’m the best
friend that you never want-”
It was a miracle Jensen managed to cut himself off before he spilled all his
dirty little secrets right there on Jared’s front door step. There was the
possibility that he didn’t need to spell it all out, despite what Jensen
suggested before, Jared was pretty damn smart and he knew Jensen. Better than
anyone really. That look on his face definitely suggested he knew something
more than he had before.
“So you’re like this now... with the piercings and the tattoos, because of me.”
It was a statement, Jared’s words a little flat and hollow. “I did this to
you.”
“Oh my god, he’s managed to use his brain to puzzle something out. Let’s note
this day in history. The headlines can say, super asshole jock uses one percent
mental capabilities, scientists marvel.” Jensen waved his hands about at his
sides, dropping them a moment later with a heavy whoosh. “How’s your head? Did
that hurt?”
“Fuck man, you’ve been spending too much time with Chad.” There was something
like the hint of laughter to Jared’s words and the boy stepped closer, reaching
out to thumb along Jensen’s collar. “You know, if I really am responsible for
this new look, I should probably be thanked.”
Jensen shot him a decidedly unheated look. It was supposed to be a glare but
Jared was kind of really close, and Jensen could smell his cologne. It was
familiar in a painful way; Jensen had missed it. “You want a medal or
something?” It wasn’t really the scathing remark he’d intended but he managed
more of a glare so that was something.
Of course, Jared only smirked and let his thumb drag along the upper curve of
black ink just under the jacket collar. “Your parents seen those yet? Man, they
had to have freaked.”
“They haven’t.” Jensen was losing his battle on not speaking with Jared. He’d
told Chad he wouldn’t, that he was strong enough to resist the pull, but with
Jared right there in front of him and Chad nowhere in sight, Jensen wasn’t.
“Though my mom cried after the piercing thing.”
“Personally, I think they look good on you.” Jared ducked down, his lips
brushing along the edge of Jensen’s ear, his grip tightening on the leather
collar of Jensen’s coat. “I think you look fuckin’ hot as hell Jen. I’m sorry I
hurt you, didn’t mean to, but maybe you could some inside and we could talk?
You could tell me all about what I did.”
Heat boiled just under Jensen’s skin, bringing a flush to his cheeks, causing
his breath to hitch in his chest. He was swaying into Jared out of his control,
every inch of him tingling. “I- I won’t be some easy lay for you Jared. Forget
that. I’m not yours.”
“But you could be,” Jared said easily, with a level of confidence Jensen had
heard from him a million times before.
When he spoke about games and plays, girls and whores, little trophies he could
add to his belt notch or whatever. Jensen would not be that. As much as he’d
love to give it up for Jared - and probably would, in a heartbeat - he couldn’t
be that thing so easily dismissed once it was used up. So he broke away from
Jared and stepped back, praying the arousal in his jeans wasn’t too obvious.
“Go find someone else to fuck, Jared. If all you want is someone with tattoos
and piercings then I’m sure you can find it elsewhere.”
“What if I just want you?” Jared asked quietly but he didn’t step forward.
Instead he slid back a step and tucked his hands into his pockets, eyeing
Jensen like a lion would eye his next meal. “Maybe I just want to explore your
tattoos.”
“Well then, you better get used to not getting what you want.” It was a pretty
lame comeback and Jensen huffed, spinning on his Converses and heading back
down the walkway. The sooner he got away from Jared, the better.
“I always get what I want, Jensen!” Jared called after him and Jensen quickened
his steps, ignoring the way Jared was laughing and the heat that still crawled
through him.
~~
Jensen was irritated. It was understandable, really, considering Jared had been
this constant nagging presence over the last couple of weeks and Jensen
couldn’t seem to escape him. Sure he ignored the boy, blew him off, shot back
as many snarky, scathing remarks as he could, but Jared wasn’t easily
dissuaded. Jensen already knew this about him. Especially when the boy felt
like there was something he wanted and it was being denied of him, he’d do
whatever it took to get it.
Chad kept telling Jensen to stay tough, ride it out, kept saying how proud of
Jensen he was. Of course, Chad couldn’t possibly know how hard it was to resist
when Jared’s gaze darkened on him, cheeks flushing, that heady look of lust
Jensen had seen on Jared’s face before but only directed at others. It was
enough to drive Jensen a little crazy, especially at night when he laid in bed
and thought about Jared imagining him like that.
But he wasn’t an idiot. He knew those looks would burn away the moment Jensen
gave into him. That fact alone was the only thing keeping Jensen back some
days. Because being cast aside like that? After having Jared? It would probably
kill him.
All these things were piling up in him, adding up and tangling together, and
Jensen blew off Chad that Friday night because he wasn’t up for hanging out
with anyone. He felt on edge, testy, and the safety of his dark bedroom seemed
a much wiser place to spend his time. The weekend before he’d added the last
little bit of his tattoo at the base of his spine; it was still kind of sore,
which was really the only welcome distraction to Jared and all the crap he
couldn’t seem to get over.
Jensen wasn’t trying to being some melodramatic teenager as he sat in his room
in the dark, staring at the opposite wall. Maybe he was just taking the time to
figure shit out. It wasn’t easy to have one best friend your entire life and
suddenly lose him over the course of a summer and then have him not really care
about getting that friendship back. No, all he wanted was Jensen’s body, the
one that had been marked and pierced, like some type of trophy.
When the light in the house next to his turned on it flooded through Jensen’s
window, spreading out across his feet. It sent tension rolling across his spine
and his eyes fell closed. It wasn’t like Jared would know he was sitting there
in the dark, not at all moping. Why Jared was home on a Friday evening Jensen
wasn’t sure. Usually Jared always went to some party after practice when there
wasn’t a game.
Rising slowly, Jensen crossed his room and leaned against the window seal. He
could see Jared crossing his room, dropping his sports bag, slipping off his
coat. So many years Jensen had watched Jared in his room, watching TV or
playing X-box or just laying around, and it had never felt weird. In that
moment though he felt like a spy or a perv or something. Because Jared was
pulling off his shirt and Jensen could see miles of smooth flesh.
For a moment Jared’s gaze flickered up to him and Jensen reflexively stepped
back, shrinking further into the shadows. There was no way Jared knew he was
there, but the boy slowly stepped forward, coming to a stop directly in front
of the window, and he didn’t tear his gaze away. Jensen stared because turning
away wasn’t a possibility, not even as Jared dragged his thumb down the middle
of his chest, circling his belly button then slipping further down.
Jared continued to stare his way with confidence, like he knew Jensen was there
and watching, like he knew Jensen couldn’t possibly tear his gaze away. The
boy’s thumb slid across the fine trial of hair to his jean button and the air
hitched painfully in Jensen’s chest. The moment Jared’s thumb flicked open the
button on the loose denim Jensen stepped forward, into the faint light spilling
between their houses and casting a soft glow in Jensen’s room.
There was something like a knowing smile on Jared’s features but Jensen only
spared a moment to glance at it. Instead his gaze was focused more on the slow
drag of the zipper being tugged down, Jared’s fingers moving with a steady
confidence Jensen was sure he’d been born with. As Jared’s fingers slipped
under the top of his boxers Jensen lifted a hand, pressing it flat against the
cooling window in front of him.
He wanted to turn away, wanted to flip Jared off and roll his eyes and make it
clear this wasn’t doing anything to him. Only he wanted to watch more, he
wanted to see Jared’s fingers curl around his cock, and a moment later that was
exactly what happened. Jared used his forearm to push down his boxers and free
his cock and Jensen clenched his teeth to keep his jaw from opening.
There was at least fifteen feet separating them, two windows, a yard and fence
and the stupid rose bushes both their mothers had planted to bring up the value
of their property. But Jensen swore he could almost hear Jared soft moan as his
lips parted with the slow roll of his hips into the loose curl of his fingers.
Jensen sucked in a painful breath, unable to tear his gaze from the steady fuck
upwards of Jared’s hips.
His fingers pressed near painfully hard into the window, his lips parted in a
soft pant, and he didn’t look up from the red swollen flush of Jared’s cock
because he didn’t want to see the sure-to-be satisfied smirk on Jared’s lips.
So he kept his eyes locked on each slide of Jared’s fingers, the slow twist-
stroke-drag of his fingers, the steady roll thrust of his hips as he picked up
speed.
Jensen refused to drop his hand down to his own pressing arousal, refused to
let Jared see just how turned on he was. It was bad enough the boy knew he was
watching really but Jensen just couldn’t make himself strong enough to turn
away like he knew he should. Chad would completely fucking lose it if he knew
how Jensen was giving in to temptation in such a way. But how could he not
watch? As Jared’s fist quickened, Jensen’s body began to buzz, the pleasure
almost too intense for Jensen to ignore.
Jared stepped in closer to the window, his free hand pressing to the glass, his
forehead dropping to rest against it a moment later. His mouth moved slowly and
Jensen thought, maybe, that might have been his name on the boy’s lips.
Jensen’s brain couldn’t wrap around this, why Jared was messing with him in
such a way, but he figured it was likely just another of Jared’s techniques.
He wasn’t used to having to work so hard to get someone. Obviously Jared saw
Jensen as an ultimate challenge and he was stepping up his play. Jensen was
distracted for just a moment by the flush on Jared’s cheeks but the steady
thrust of the boy’s hips was picking up speed and Jensen’s gaze rapidly
dropped, lingering on the shiny tip of Jared’s cock as it disappeared under the
brush of his thumb.
Then Jared was coming, the splash of white landing against the window, and all
the air seized in Jensen’s lungs. He nearly came in his jeans right there, just
from watching, and his hand shook as he dropped it from the window. Jared was
panting against the window, the glass around him steaming up then fading every
few seconds.
Jensen stepped back, his gaze fixed on Jared even as the boy’s eyes slowly
lifted to meet his. Jensen expected a smirk, or that knowing smile, something
that told him Jared knew it was a victory. But the boy simply stared and
Jensen’s heart lodged in his throat. It was like some type of moment and he
couldn’t name it, didn’t want to. Instead he reached out and grasped the string
for the blinds, tugging hard and letting it slowly drop, almost relieved when
Jared’s body vanished from sight.
He nearly stumbled to his bed, so hard it was painful. Something sharp pricked
along his eyelids and Jensen refused to acknowledge the maybe-tears as he
dropped down on his mattress and shoved his hands under his jeans. So many
times in the past he’d got himself off thinking about Jared, imagining those
fingers roaming over his skin, but it had never felt like this before.
Falling back on the bed, Jensen stroked over his cock and wrestled with that
part of him that was nagging wrong, wrong, wrong. Jared didn’t want him, not
really, he was trying to get him because he felt like he had to - especially
knowing what a challenge it was. But god, Jensen wanted Jared. He wanted to
touch every inch of him, wanted those hands mapping along the endless miles of
creamy smooth skin.
Jensen kicked off his jeans and let his fingertips stroke over his cock,
teasing the sensitive skin. One hand lifted and his finger slipped between his
lips, parting to suck the digit in full and soak the skin with spit. As he
thought of Jared’s lips on his skin his hand dropped once more and circled his
hole, inching forward to slip just inside the tight muscle. It wasn’t like he
hadn’t touched himself like this before, and thought about Jared as he did so,
but those images of Jared getting himself off were still so fresh in his mind.
As his finger slid slowly up into his tight entrance Jensen rocked back, trying
to imagine Jared’s fingers inside him instead. What would it really hurt if
Jensen gave in? If he spread his legs for Jared? Jared’s fingers would fill him
so richly, spreading him further apart, reaching deeper to touch every inch of
him. Then he’d pull those fingers back and would thrust deep into him with his
cock, stretching him even wider, and Jensen would be connected in that one way
he’d always longed for with Jared.
Just the thought alone had his fingers picking up speed, the grip on his cock
tightening, the fingers inside him twisting to plunge deeper. He just barely
grazed that spot up in him that had his hips snapping up, his orgasm already
sparking up through him. As he came he thought of the look on Jared’s face as
he hit his own release, imagined the boy’s deep tone as he moaned Jensen’s
name.
Jensen slumped down on the mattress, still panting, still buzzing from his
release. The swell of want though hadn’t eased with his release. He wanted
Jared even more. He wanted Jared to want him. Even as he knew Jared would never
want the real him, wouldn’t love and care for the same way, Jensen’s desire
wasn’t waning.
Pursing his lips, Jensen rolled over and grabbed his phone, hitting Chad’s name
in his contacts and pressing his phone against his ear.
“Jen? Thought you were going hermit on me tonight,” Chad laughed into the line
and Jensen hiccuped on half a sob. “Aw shit, what happened?”
“Just... Jared.” That was probably answer enough.
***** Chapter 2 *****
“You’re a real fuckin’ piece of work, you know that, right?”
Chad’s voice was cold and harsh in a way Jared had never really heard it before
and his steps slowed, fingers curling into the straps on his backpack as he
turned to face his friend. Or, once friend as it was. Ever since he’d come back
from California and school started up again, Chad and he weren’t exactly on
speaking terms. Instead for the last month Jared had watched Chad stick to
Jensen’s side like an unpleasant growth with a bad temper.
Jared wasn’t really in the mood for a snark battle with Chad, especially if
Jensen wasn’t at least there for something nice to look at. “What the hell did
I even do to you, Chad? Do you even know? Or have you finally just succumbed to
jealousy because you’ve always wanted to be me?”
“You fucking wish,” Chad spat and pushed off the wall, shoving Jared’s shoulder
a beat later. “It must hurt, having your head shoved so far up your ass.”
“Hilarious.” Jared rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to rub at his
shoulders and the lingering ache of Chad’s hard touch. “Seriously. What the
hell did I do that has you acting like this? You’ve always been a douche but
never really to me. You wanna explain it?”
“Are you seriously this fucking retarded?” Chad huffed, arms flailing out hard
enough to smack Jared’s chest again. “What’s wrong with your brain? Those other
players smack you in the head too many times or something? Your mama drop you
one too many times as a kid?”
“Hey now, no need to bring my mama into this conversation,” Jared muttered,
trying to sound more defensive and annoyed than hurt and unsure. Between Chad
and Jensen, Jared was going to get some kind of complex or something.
“Jensen. Come on Jared, put the pieces together, use the tiny little part of
your brain that I know can work.” Chad reached out to tap two fingers against
Jared’s temple, groaning when Jared simply stared at him. “Jensen.”
Of course, Jared had already known this whole thing came down to Jensen. No
matter what Chad seemed to think, Jared wasn’t that dumb. But whatever pieces
he was supposed to be putting into place weren’t lining up. “What? Like, the
him being hurt because I ditched him thing? I’ve done it a million times, I’ve
tried to apologize, and I offered plenty of other ways to make things better.
Not my fault if he’s not interested.” Actually, Jared was a little hurt by the
way Jensen kept brushing him off but he wasn’t gonna tell Chad that.
“He’s in love with you!” Chad nearly yelled the words, causing a few people
passing by to look curiously over at them. Jared stared, his eyes wide as
Chad’s hands dropped and he laughed in disbelief. “You really didn’t know? Are
you fucking kidding me?”
“But... he’s... we’re best friends,” Jared whispered, trying to sort out Chad’s
words, force them to make sense. Jensen. In love with him.
Surprisingly, the expression on Chad’s face softened. “Yeah, you were. He’s had
a thing for you for years Jared but he thought, you were straight, dating
Sandy, he dealt with it. Then the end of year party and he saw-”
“Me with that boy,” Jared filled in and yeah, the pieces were suddenly lining
up a lot quicker. That night, no matter how drunk he was, he could still
remember. Jensen had sounded so shocked when he’d found Jared with that boy in
the guest room, which was part of the reason Jared had gone to check up on him.
He’d thought at the time that maybe Jensen was having issues with the whole gay
- or well, bi, - thing.
Apparently, he’d been way off base. And that expression on Chad’s face hardened
once more. “Just imagine how he felt to learn the boy he was in love with
wasn’t so straight. He was crushed, Jared. Then you came out there and I know
you knew he was upset but you still hurried off to hook up with whoever that
asshole was.”
“And so he changed himself? The tattoos and piercings, he really did do all
that because I... I broke his heart?” Jared stumbled back until he could lean
against the wall, like the weight of this conversation alone was breaking down
all his strength. He blinked a few times and looked over at Chad. “I turned him
into this... cold little bastard he’s become?”
“Shut up fucker,” Chad snapped, punching Jared’s arm. “He’s not cold and he’s
definitely not a bastard! He’s... Jesus, you don’t even know anything about
him. You’ve spent your whole life taking advantage of the fact that Jensen was
always around, that he’d follow you wherever. You never even stopped to notice
how great he truly is.”
Jared bit down on his lip for a moment then looked over at Chad, unable to deny
just how right Chad was. “You’re not... you don’t like him, do you?”
Chad stared for a moment then laughed. “God, no, I don’t do dicks. But I like
him, you know, like the awesome brother I’ve never had or something.”
“You have four brothers,” Jared pointed out quietly, possibly still a little
shocked.
“That’s beside the point. Jensen is awesome. He’s funny and hella smart and for
some stupid reason, he’s still ridiculously hung up on you. He deserves someone
a million times better than you but since I can’t get him to see that, maybe I
can knock some sense into your stupid jock brain.” Chad shrugged and folded his
arms over his chest. “So, how do you feel about him? Because if you think I’m
just gonna let you fuck him and toss him to the side then you’ve got another
think coming.”
“And who decided you get to make that choice?” Jared shot back before he could
think better of it. It was easier to be defensive and Chad was being a dick.
This was a lot to absorb and Jared needed some time to really take it all in.
When Chad just raised his brows in disbelief Jared groaned and let his head
drop back against the wall. “Are you seriously asking if I’m in love with him
or something? Because, god, Chad, up until five minutes ago I didn’t even know
how deep his feelings went. I can’t just... magically feel that way.”
“I think you already do. I think it’s why you’re trying so hard to seduce him.
You want him around again, you miss him. And you obviously think he’s fucking
hot which, I’m straight and I can say he is so you’re right there.” Chad
shrugged and stepped back. “Maybe you’ll figure your shit out and get him back.
But you better be begging for forgiveness on your hands and knees and then
some. Because you’re gonna have to work your fucking ass off to be worth having
someone like Jensen in your life again.”
Jared swallowed thickly, staring at Chad until he couldn’t take anymore. It was
obvious how serious the blonde was, possibly more serious than Jared had ever
seen him, and he was maybe just a little nervous. How could he possibly win
Jensen back after he’d broken his heart? And was Chad right? Could he really be
in love with Jensen? Up until a few minutes ago Jared was pretty sure no
teenager could really even feel love.
“I’ll try,” Jared whispered and it was the best he could do at the moment. Chad
would just have to be okay with that.
~~
It was too damn early. Jensen didn’t used to have a problem getting up and
getting ready for school but this sleepless nights thing was kind of killing
him. Things were supposed to get better once Jared wasn’t part of his life
anymore; he was supposed to be able to handle seeing him with the confidence
that he wasn’t that geeky little boy who trailed along at his heels. Now
though, all he could think about was Jared, worse than it ever had been before,
because he was the very reason they weren’t anything.
Sure, that something would be a random hook up until Jared got tired of him and
tossed him aside but at least for the moment he would be Jensen’s. And he’d
forever get to say he lost his virginity to the man he was still in love with,
so at least there was that. But how could Jensen possibly move on after Jared
already had? It was putting Jensen at risk of having his heart broken all over
again.
And really, going through all these thoughts all over again as he waited for
Chad to pick him up was exhausting. Why couldn’t he get his brain to shut up
for a few minutes?
“Need a ride?” Wouldn’t it just figure that there was Jared, sounding bright
and cheerful despite the early hour.
Jensen blinked out at the street a couple of times, then half twisted, glancing
over at Jared. The early morning sun was catching along random strands in his
honey golden hair, lighting it up, and nearly sparkling. He was fucking
gorgeous and it wasn’t even eight AM. Fucker. “I’m waiting for Chad,” Jensen
said simply and turned back, tugging his phone from his pocket just to have
something else to look at it.
“You sure? I mean, I’m here already.” There was a shrug with Jared’s words,
Jensen didn’t even have to look back at Jared to know that much.
“No I-” Jensen cut off as his phone beeped. It was a message from Chad, about
damn time, and he lifted it up to show Jared. “Chad, see?”
Only when he lowered the phone the message said, can’t make it this morning and
Jensen’s heart kind of sank. Damn Chad. Of all the mornings he chose not to
show up, why did it have to be the one in which Jared was there to witness the
whole thing? “Problems?” Jared asked quietly, stepping toward him.
Jensen frowned at his phone then looked up, expecting to see a smirk on Jared’s
face. There wasn’t one, just a familiar, warm smile and Jensen’s heart
fluttered against his control. “Chad can’t pick me up,” he said though he
hadn’t really meant to. Damn Jared for always have some weird subconscious
power over him.
“Bummer. Well then, looks like you can use a ride. Get in.” Jared turned back
to his car and tugged the door open, climbing behind the wheel and not leaving
Jensen much choice but to follow.
Or walk the near twenty miles to school. And a big fuck no to that. “Fine,”
Jensen grumbled even though Jared had already shut his door.
Trying not to sigh too heavily, or bounce over to the car excitedly, Jensen
crossed slowly to the passenger side and tugged the door open, dropping heavily
down in the seat. He hadn’t been in Jared’s car for months but it was exactly
the same, smelled the same, just like Jared. It made everything in Jensen
tighten and twist unpleasantly and he turned his gaze out the window, trying to
pretend like it didn’t hurt just to be sitting there.
It was silent as they began their drive, the route just as familiar as
everything else, like Jared humming along with Modest Mouse playing on the
stereo. Jensen sank further down in the seat, focusing on hating Chad because
thinking about being stuck in the car with Jared for any length of time was
maddening.
“Jen,” Jared said quietly when they were more than halfway there and Jensen
tensed. “I just wanted to apologize. I... I didn’t even realize how I’d hurt
you, I didn’t know how much I meant to you.”
Jensen frowned and slowly turned to look at Jared, blinking a few times like
that would somehow give some logic to Jared’s words. Talk about coming out of
left field. The last Jensen knew, Jared had been proud of being responsible for
Jensen’s transformation. And what the hell did he know about how Jensen felt
about him? “What are you talking about?”
Jared sighed, shifting one hand on the wheel and slipping the other up through
his hair in that way he did that always made him look a little like a model.
“You were in love with me. And I broke your heart. I really didn’t mean to. I
guess it didn’t even occur to me that you might feel like that, or like I
wouldn’t want you.”
Hearing this was just too much. Jensen had no idea how Jared had finally
figured it all out; it had been so glaring before and now it was mostly hidden,
but he had a pretty good feeling Chad was behind it. Stupid Chad. He should
know better than to get in the middle of this entire thing. “You think I was in
love with you?”
They pulled up to a red light and Jared turned to face Jensen, brows pulling
together. “Weren’t you?”
“You’re an idiot.” Jensen rolled his eyes and purposefully looked away. Jared’s
confused expression was too adorable.
“And you’re an asshole,” Jared said through a laugh, continuing to drive as the
light changed. “So what, you weren’t in love with me?”
“It’s not so much a matter of past tense,” Jensen muttered grumpily and slid
his arms over his chest, sinking down in the seat once more and glaring out the
window at the passing town. “Are you trying to mock me or something? Is this
some big game to you?”
“Fuck. I really did a number on you didn’t I? You’ve never been this cold to me
before. No matter how stupid I was.” Jared sighed and pulled over, slipping his
car into park and turning to face Jensen. “Look at me. Come on Jen, please?”
It was Jared’s soft, unsure tone that hit Jensen the hardest. He’d never been
able to handle Jared being hurt, especially not at his hands. So he turned to
look at Jared, pursing his lips in the annoyance he was barely holding on to.
“You don’t even understand, Jared. Can’t you just let this go? Don’t you know
by now that I’m not just gonna give it up for you? So whatever this new
technique is, just stop.”
“New technique?” Jared frowned and leaned closer, reaching out to drag his
thumb over the ring on Jensen’s lip. “Maybe you’re the one who doesn’t
understand. Why are you so convinced that this is a game for me?”
“Because that’s all it ever is,” Jensen whispered, far too breathless. He
didn’t mean to let it be so obvious, the way he felt, but if the rush of air
out of his lungs wasn’t a dead giveaway then Jared would know from the flush of
color on his cheeks. Jared was close enough Jensen could smell him and Jensen
inhaled deeply because he couldn’t get enough even as he wanted to push away.
“You just want my body, you don’t even care that I’m not your friend anymore,
you just want to fuck me.”
“Jen,” Jared sighed and curled his finger under Jensen’s jaw, dragging him
close enough their lips brushed slowly together. Pleasure sparked through
Jensen and he gasped, leaning in out of his control once more because how could
he possibly turn away? “You’re so wrong. I miss you so much it hurts. No one
knows me like you do. I want more than your body. I want you.”
As Jared lips slanted deeper over his Jensen gasped, his fingers curling over
Jared’s shoulder and digging into the soft cotton of his shirt to hold on. He
needed something to ground him. Because Jared’s lips were soft and warm and
better than all those things Jensen had imagined over the years. Jared wasted
no time in deepening the kiss, sliding his tongue forward to trace along
Jensen’s lower lip. Jensen’s mind spun.
Warm fingers were sliding up his thigh, tracing over his jeans, dipping down to
map along the inseam and Jensen moaned softly into the kiss. Oh fuck. Jared’s
tongue in his mouth, along his own, Jared’s hand between his legs, sliding up
until his thumb was ghosting along Jensen’s zipper and well, that was about
enough. Talk about sensation overload.
Pulling back from the kiss, Jensen flattened his hand on Jared’s shoulder and
pushed, trying to get some space between them. “This isn’t happening here,” he
whispered, maybe a little breathless, lips still tingling and swollen.
“But it’s happening?” Jared, at least, sounded just as breathless and Jensen
took satisfaction from that. If he could make Jared feel even a little crazy
and out of control then maybe Jensen still had some cards left to play.
He lifted a hand and brushed his thumb over the ring on his lip, taking a
moment to get his thoughts under control. God, his heart was racing. Not just
because of the kiss, not because Jared’s hand was still on his thigh. The idea
of more, of them, was enough to make him feel dizzy all over again. “You’ve
gotta prove it to me. I won’t be another notch on your belt. You really want
me? You really miss me? Then fucking prove it.”
Jared stared a moment longer then smiled, dipping down to let hair fall into
his eyes. “I will. I’ll prove it to you. Want you as way more than a notch on
my belt.” He laughed and squeezed Jensen’s thigh. “You’re gonna be my perfect
eye candy.”
Jensen rolled his eyes and slid his arms over his chest once more, turning away
so Jared wouldn’t see the hint of a smile on his face. “You fucking wish. Now,
can we go to school? My parents said they’d ground me if I skipped another
class.”
“Good, you need to knock that shit off, Mister Tough Guy.” Jared laughed and
withdrew his hand, slipping the car into drive once more and revving the
engine.
Once more they fell into silence but Jensen thought it was different this time,
more electrically charged or something. Jensen couldn’t stop thinking about
Jared’s lips against his own, the feel of his hand, and that promise for more.
And judging from the smile on Jared’s face, he was maybe thinking about the
same things. Maybe. Jensen still had to work on getting himself to actually
believe that Jared wanted more than just the physical.
They pulled into the parking lot and Jared easily navigated through the kids
into a spot, grinning at Jensen as he parked. “So, lunch today? We could hit up
Taco Bell and go eat at the park.” Jared leaned across the seats once more,
letting his nose brush along Jensen’s jaw bone.
Jensen swallowed thickly and suppressed a shudder. The heat of Jared’s breath
caused his skin to prickle with gooseflesh. “Got plans today,” he forced
himself to whisper. He couldn’t give it all up to Jared so easily, what proof
would that be? How would he know Jared wasn’t going to just ditch him later?
So he pushed open the passenger door and slid out onto his feet, dipping down
to peer across the seats at Jared. “Jared?”
The boy was watching him, still smiling slightly, and he dipped his head in a
nod. “Yeah?”
“This isn’t going to be easy.” Jensen smirked at Jared then turned, shutting
the door with a slam and half jogging up to the school building. At least this
whole Jared proving it thing could be fun.
~~
“Tell me why I shouldn’t kick your ass,” Jensen asked through half a hiss as he
dropped onto the bleachers beside Chad, brows drawn together in a glare. “Like,
seriously. I should put out my next smoke in the middle of your forehead or
something.”
“As if you ever would,” Chad scoffed and leaned back on his elbows, offering
the cigarette between his fingers out to Jensen. “What’d I do?”
Jensen pinched the filter between his fingers and brought it to his lips,
drawing in and slowly blowing out. Smoking wasn’t really his favorite thing but
sometimes, when he was stressed out, it really did help. Also, he kind of felt
cool when the cigarette was between his lips. “You told Jared how I feel. Then
you ditched me this morning so I’d have to ride with him.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Chad smirked and pulled a new
cigarette from his pack, letting Jensen finish his own. “So what happened?”
Jensen rolled his eyes, Chad was a horrible liar, and let his eyes scan across
the field and over to the outer quad. He could just see Jared, arms flailing
out at his sides as he entertained his dutifully laughing audience. “He kissed
me,” Jensen said quietly, watching Jared’s body move. He almost thought he
could hear the boy laugh but that was crazy. “And put his hand between my
legs.”
“Fucker, I’ll kill him,” Chad huffed, pushing off the bleachers and standing.
A laugh rose up in Jensen and he caught Chad’s pant leg, tugging him back down.
“Slow your roll, Batman. I stopped him before anything happened. I told him if
he really wants me, more than just my fine ass, he was gonna have to fight for
it and prove it to me. So as much as I appreciate you trying to be my knight in
shining armor, sit your ass down before you make a fool of yourself.”
Chad looked over toward the quad for a moment before sighing heavily and
dropping down beside Jensen once more. “So you gonna make him work for it huh?
Got any plans in mind?”
“Short of begging and groveling on his hands and knees? Nah, not really.”
Jensen smirked and finished off his cigarette with a long drag, flicking the
butt over the back of the stands. His eyes settled on Jared once more as he
blew out the smoke through his nose. “Any ideas?”
They fell into an easy, familiar silence for a long few moments, Jensen taking
another cigarette from the pack as Chad offered it out. Until wasn’t after he’d
lit it up and watched Jared move out of the quad and back into the school that
Chad answered. “Make him bottom.”
Jensen choked on a laugh and chose not to answer. Chad didn’t need to know how
badly he wanted Jared fucking into him.
~~~
The good thing was, Jensen was talking to him, kind of, mostly. Sure it was a
lot more snark and sarcasm than friendly banter but whatever, it was progress.
The bad thing though, was how often Jensen was likely to snub him. Jared knew
he had his work cut out for him, he knew he was going to have to get creative
if he wanted Jensen to truly believe him, but it didn’t seem like the boy was
giving him much leeway.
What Jared really needed was some time with Jensen not in a car or at school or
with Chad hanging around. Chad was like a worrisome mother, hovering and
scoffing and rolling his eyes whenever Jared even tried to make conversation.
Lord help him if he called Jensen out on smoking, apparently that wasn’t
something he was allowed to argue.
Jared had a plan though. It was Friday and there was no practice because of the
game the following day. He was supposed to take it easy, relax at home
according to Coach, but he’d spent the last five days trying to get Jensen to
give him a chance and that wasn’t working so he was about to make things much
more serious.
“Come over,” Jared said the moment he caught up with Jensen outside the school,
hooking an arm around the thin waist under Jensen’s leather jacket.
Jensen huffed but didn’t push away. “Demanding, bitch?”
“Aw come on, Jen, I know you want to.” Jared pressed his lips just beneath
Jensen’s ear, not caring so much about the people walking around him. He was
kind of untouchable as the star quarterback, and he could kick anyone’s ass who
had an issue with it.
Also, whenever he touched Jensen in front of people, he couldn’t help noticing
the way it made the boy smile. He was pleased by the attention, pleased that
Jared wasn’t trying to deny what was happening between them. It was such an
easy way to get Jensen to forgive him for being an idiot that Jared didn’t mind
putting himself out there.
“Please?” Jared murmured and let his other arm slip around Jensen’s waist,
effectively stopping the boy from walking further and pulling him back flush
against his front. “We could... watch a movie, or something.”
Jensen’s body sank back against Jared and heat crawled through him like he knew
it would. Even with the growth spurt Jensen had gone through over the summer,
his frame was still slighter, thin against his own, and Jared laid his palms
flat against sharp hipbones. The more Jensen relaxed the more Jared knew he’d
won the boy over and Jensen was just holding out to be a tease. “I get to pick
the movie,” he finally said and stepped away, continuing to walk, turning only
to throw a smirk at Jared over his shoulder.
“As long as it’s not Legally Blonde or whatever that one chick flick was you
love so much!” Jared hollered after him, laughing when the kids walking around
them looked their way. When Jensen flipped him off over his shoulder Jared
laughed harder and jogged to catch up.
~~~
It had been so long since Jensen had been in his room, Jared was stuck for a
few minutes on how to handle him there. Which was weird. His entire life he’d
had Jensen over countless times. Hell, Jensen had probably spent more nights
sleeping at his house than he had his own if you added it all up. But now, here
was Jensen, and Jared’s palms were all sweaty, his heart was racing.
It wasn’t like it ever was before, not with Sandy or any of the others - not
that there had been that many, Jared might have exaggerated the numbers some.
Just the idea of having Jensen on his bed made him excited in a way he wasn’t
used to.
“So um, Legally Blonde?” He suggested, shrugging out of his coat and smiling to
hopefully hide some of his nerves. Him, nervous, it was kind of ridiculous.
When he turned back Jensen was watching him with a raised brow, his standard
leather jacket halfway down his arms. “You legit own Legally Blonde? You pick
that up in sunny Cali?”
“Did you just say legit?” Jared scoffed and kicked off his shoes, sending them
clattering into the bottom of his computer desk. “You’ve been spending too much
time with Chad. You should stop that.”
“And what, spend more time with you?” Once more Jensen’s brow arched and Jared
spent a long moment marveling at the way the eyebrow bar curved up with it.
“What do you see? When you space out like that? You look at me like you’re
seeing something... weird.”
“Not weird.” Jared shook his head and stepped slowly forward, curling his
fingers over the edge of the leather coat and tugging down. “Just different.
You’re different. Still got your glasses?”
“Obviously.” Jensen was likely going for his usual snark but the word was kind
of breathy, the way it got whenever Jared crowded into his space in any way.
“You didn’t think I was hot before.”
Jared smiled softly and tossed the coat onto his bed. Jensen was wearing
another of those tight white shirts and Jared reached up to trace the curl of
the tattoo just under his sleeve. “I didn’t think I could think of you as hot.
Jen, you might have thought you were pretty obvious in the way you felt for me
but you really weren’t. I had no idea. You were like... my little brother. But
I did think you were hot, in a unique way. I mean, look at your lips, how could
I not notice those?”
As he let his thumb drag Jensen’s lower lip out he stepped in closer, feeling
the faintest tremble coming from the boy and smiling just slightly. “Am I
making you nervous, Jen?”
“Don’t get full of yourself, Jared,” Jensen whispered and turned in one swift
movement, pushing Jared back until he hit the bed and dropped. He barely had a
moment to brace himself then Jensen was straddling his thighs, digging fingers
up into his hair and tilting his head up with a tight pull. “You’ve gotta learn
you’re not the only one with the power here.”
Jensen’s threat, if you wanted to call it that, shot pleasure through Jared and
he slipped his hands around Jensen’s thin waist, tucking his fingers under the
warm cotton of his shirt. “And what kind of power do you have?”
“I know how badly you want me,” Jensen whispered against Jared’s lips, rolling
his hips forward so slowly the teasing friction made Jared jerk up for more out
of instinct. “I can already feel it, you’ve practically been begging for it for
weeks. But I know you won’t take me unless I let you. So I’d say I have all the
power.”
Jared groaned as the slow roll of Jensen’s hips increased, the friction
crawling through at a torturous rate. “All the power. Yeah, sure.” He was
panting already which seemed ridiculous but couldn’t be helped. Jensen was like
molten lava sitting on his lap and how could Jared not being steadily going
insane because of this. “You still a virgin?”
He watched as Jensen pulled back, staring down at him and slowly wetting his
lips. “What? You think I let Chad fuck me?”
The idea of Chad touching Jensen had Jared growling possessively, his hands
tightening over Jensen’s thin hipbones. “You better not have.”
“Like I would,” Jensen snorted and dipped down, ghosting his lips over Jared’s
in the hint of a kiss. “I was saving myself.”
“For me?” Jared had meant to make it a statement, let Jensen know he was
already claiming him as his own, but the question slipped out as a soft
whisper. He tilted up into the kiss, searching for more, struggling to deepen
it.
Jensen moaned softly into the kiss and pressed harder forward, his nails
scraping along Jared’s scalp and locking in his hair. Their tongues slid
together slowly and Jensen’s hips rocked harder forward, sending a tremble
though his body that had Jared groaning once more. This was so fucking hot
Jared already felt like he was going to come, how in the world did Jensen get
like this? Or how had Jared missed it?
“For you,” Jensen finally murmured into the slow part of their lips. “Touch me,
Jared.”
That was enough of a plea for Jared. His hands slid around to the front of
Jensen’s jeans, thumb sliding along the button and slipping it free. Jensen’s
fingers continued to massaging along his scalp and Jared closed his eyes,
tilting into the touch because it felt good enough to make his cock twitch and
swell further. He fumbled with the top of Jensen’s fly, dragging it down
roughly and forcing his eyes open once more.
Jensen’s cock was already rock hard, pressing through his white briefs, and
Jared wet his lips as his palm rolled over the cotton down against swollen
flesh. “So, no one has ever touched you like this? No one has gotten you off?”
“No one,” Jensen gasped, arms falling to loop around Jared’s shoulders and hold
on tight. His hips jerked up into the teasing heat of Jared’s hand and he
smiled, tilting up enough to catch Jensen’s lip ring between his teeth and
slowly pull out.
“What do you do when you get yourself off? What do you think about?” Jared
asked in a murmur against Jensen’s lips, letting his fingers curl over Jensen’s
cock through his briefs and stroking slowly up. “Tell me.”
Jensen moaned and arched into his body, rocking against Jared like he was
riding his cock already. God what a thought. “I... finger myself,” Jensen
gasped and curled his fingers to dig nails into Jared’s back and slowly tug his
shirt up. “Think about your fingers buried in me, your cock.”
“Fuck,” Jared groaned and finally caved to the urge to feel skin on skin,
tugging at the hem of Jensen’s briefs and shoving his hand roughly beneath the
fabric. Jensen’s cock was radiating heat, twitching against Jared’s hand, and
as Jensen’s ass rolled against the maddening pressure in his crotch Jared
dropped his lips to the boy’s neck. “You want my cock buried in you? Want me to
fuck you open Jen?”
“God, yeah,” Jensen gasped, curling one hand along the back of Jared’s neck and
working his hips up once more into the loose curl of Jared’s fingers. “Watched
you jack off, you know, couldn’t think about anything but you for days
afterwards.”
“That was the point,” Jared laughed deeply and mouthed along the curved black
ink of Jensen’s tattoo. “How’d you get these?”
“Chad knows a guy,” Jensen nearly moaned the answer and well, Jared could have
gone the rest of his life without hearing Jensen moan Chad’s name like that.
His eyebrows lifted as he pulled back and Jensen laughed weakly. “How about,
less talking when your hand is on my cock. Yeah?”
“Good idea.” Jared smirked and sank his teeth into the taut muscles of Jensen’s
neck, dragging out slowly. His grip on Jensen’s cock tightened, sliding down to
the base and stroking slowly back up. Jensen’s body moved like a wave under
his, rolling up into the touch and back down, ass grinding against Jared’s
crotch in a delicious slow swivel.
The faster he stroked the quicker Jensen’s moans came, the more the boy writhed
and twisted and Jared panted against his neck, struggling to catch his breath.
Even that one time he’d had Sandy on his lap wasn’t as hot as this and Jared
worked his other hand forward, slipping underneath Jensen’s jeans to roll along
his balls.
“Oh, oh god, Jared,” Jensen moaned too loudly and bucked forward, head tipping
back, granting Jared the surprisingly beautiful view of smooth skin stretched
out before him. “Close. Jesus, fuck.”
Jared pushed up to capture Jensen’s lips in a kiss before the boy could get any
louder. Another dozen twist-squeeze-strokes and Jensen’s body was shaking all
over again, his orgasm spurting hot and slick over Jared’s fingers. Jensen’s
fingers were back in his hair, gripping tightly, his ass rolling hard down
against Jared’s crotch and it was enough to tip him over the edge. Something
about Jensen falling apart right there on his lap, Jared couldn’t hold himself
back any longer.
He slumped down on the bed moments later, Jensen tumbling with him, their lips
lazily rolling together and falling apart as they pulled in deep breaths. His
boxers felt sticky and warm but Jensen’s weight was pleasant and pressing over
him and Jared slowly pulled his hands free, wiping them on the blankets at his
sides.
“Hot,” Jensen grunted after a few long minutes, rolling off Jared and sprawling
out on the bed beside him.
Jared smiled up at the ceiling, eyes half hooded. His orgasm made him feel all
sleepy and tingling and Jensen half pressed against his side just made
everything all the better. Jared reached out and slowly linked their fingers
together, just to keep Jensen as close as he could.
“Gonna talk to me tomorrow?” Jensen asked quietly and Jared didn’t even have to
look to see how nervous he was.
Something sad panged in Jared’s heart, the idea that Jensen would really think
he wouldn’t, and he squeezed Jensen’s hand just a little tighter. “Yes.”
~~
Nerves were probably the reason Jensen texted Chad first thing the following
morning and begged the boy to pick him up. He couldn’t stand the idea of Jared
blowing him off, not waiting to take him to school, ditching him or something.
It could so easily happen and Jensen wasn’t sure what the fallout would be.
Except he knew it would hurt and controlling how it all played out was his only
hope.
When Chad pulled up he darted out to the car, steadfastly ignoring Jared’s
house and slipping into the passenger seat. “Drive.”
Chad peeled off down the street, cursing under his breath. But he didn’t ask
until they’d gotten at least five blocks away. “What the fuck did he do?”
Jensen signed and rubbed fingers along his brow, lifting his shoulders in a
shrug. “He jacked me off. We hung out all evening. It was maybe one of the best
nights of my entire life.” The car screeched to a halt as Chad all but stomped
on the brake and stared for a long moment out the windshield. Jensen,
meanwhile, slowly pushed himself off the dashboard he’d crashed into. “What the
actual fuck, Chad!”
When the blonde turned slowly to him Jensen sank back because, well, Chad
looked kind of pissed off or annoyed or something. “Are you fucking kidding
me?”
Jensen rolled his eyes, it seemed safer than letting the boy know he could
actually be a little intimidating, and folded his arms over his chest. “Are you
seriously going to lecture me on hanging out with him? I thought you were
pushing for it.”
“I’m gonna fucking lecture you on being a pussy ass bitch and hiding out from
him!” Chad smacked Jensen hard on the arm and scowled. “You’re an idiot. Now
he’s gonna think you’re freaking on him or something. You really want him to
back off now?”
That… actually hadn’t occurred to Jensen. And shit. “Turn around!”
Chad snorted a laugh and shook his head, peeling off down the street and
flipping a U-turn at the next intersection. Jensen was a little used to Chad
driving like a man with a kamikaze mission so he clung to the oh shit handle
and closed his eyes. Chad was completely right, he was an idiot, and if Jared
never wanted to talk with him again well, that would just fucking figure, maybe
Jensen even deserved it.
He had taken the step and trusted Jared the night before. Mainly because he
knew he only had two choices. Trust Jared not to screw him over or cut him
completely out of his life for good. No longer having Jared in his life wasn’t
really an option. And well, if he were completely honest, he wanted Jared too
badly to wait any longer.
Now, if he’d screwed everything up by being nervous and scared, well, he’d
maybe hate himself for the rest of his life. As they peeled around the corner
onto Jared and Jensen’s street, all the air caught in Jensen’s lungs. Jared was
just walking back from Jensen’s place, his head ducked down, hands buried in
his pockets, and Jensen’s heart tightened.
“You’re a douche,” Chad grunted and slowed the car once more.
Jensen didn’t answer or even wait until Chad stopped completely. Instead he
threw the door open, snagging his messenger bag and leaping out onto the
street. His lips twitched in a nervous smile as Jared stopped and looked up at
him, his brows drawing together in confusion.
“Sorry,” Jensen gasped as he leaped over the front hedge of Jared’s lawn and
nearly dove into the boy’s open arms. “I was scared. I- I was scared and
nervous and I’m sorry.”
Jared’s arms slowly slipped around his chest, hesitating a moment loosely
around him. “Scared?”
“That you wouldn’t...” Jensen trailed off, feeling guilty just thinking about
Jared being an asshole to him though it had happened before. Many times. “Just
thought maybe you wouldn’t be so interested after last night.”
Jared’s arms tightened then, pulling Jensen flush against his body and holding
him tighter than Jensen anticipated. “Jen,” Jared sighed and ducked down to
press his lips above the collar of the leather jacket. “You have to start
trusting me.”
“I know,” Jensen whispered and rest his head on Jared’s shoulder, breathing in
his delicious scent in deep lungfulls. “I’m getting there.”
“You cock suckers gonna cuddle all morning or are we going to school?” Chad
called out from inside his car through the still open passenger door.
Jensen huffed a laugh and pulled back to laugh but Jared answered first,
twisting to tuck Jensen possessively under his arm. “I’ll get Jen there, you
can be a bad influence on him later.”
“Then shut the goddamn door! Jesus,” Chad huffed and dropped back in his seat,
glaring out the windshield once more. If Jensen didn’t know better he would
think Chad sounded a little jealous.
Smiling up at Jared, Jensen pulled back and ran back across the yard, ducking
down to speak quietly to Chad for a moment. “We’ll hang out later, right?”
“Of course. Can’t get rid of me now.” Chad smirked over at him and shrugged.
“Don’t need you to baby me. See ya later kid.”
“Not a kid, asshole.” Jensen stuck his tongue out at Chad then laughed,
stepping back to shove the door closed and turn back to Jared. He was maybe
still a little nervous about how school would go but Jared was still touching
him so that was something.
~~~
“Heya, Jared,” Sandy’s cheerful voice had Jared stopping halfway down the hall.
The girl hadn’t really spoken to him since the end of last year and their
breakup that had been kind of on the nasty side. Jared wasn’t expecting her,
his mind was pretty centered on getting out to the back bleachers where Chad
and Jensen were likely waiting, so he just stood there confused for a moment
before turning her way. “Um, hey Sandy.”
“How are you? Feels like we haven’t talked in forever.” Sandy stepped forward,
tossing hair over her shoulder and smiling in that way she did that used to
made Jared feel warm all over.
Now though, he couldn’t even remember that rising heat. “I’m okay. Uh... how
are you?” Polite conversation with an ex? Yeah, he could totally do that. Even
if he kept turning his gaze over his shoulder because he wanted to be outside.
“I’m good. I miss you.” Sandy stepped closer but it wasn’t until her small hand
settled over his forearm that he realized this meeting was more than just exes
trying to be friendly. Sandy had a gleam to her eyes that spoke of a plan. She
pressed closer, her boobs flattening against Jared’s chest, her tongue gliding
over her lips slowly. “We were so good together, Jared. What happened to us?”
“Uh...” Jared swallowed thickly and stepped back, frowning when she simply
followed the movement. “You broke up with me because you said I was a jock
idiot. And you said you could do a million times better.”
“Oh. Well, I didn’t mean those things. I miss you, really, and we should get
together. You know... talk,” Sandy was nearly purring the words, her fingers
stroking along Jared’s side slowly.
He pursed his lips in annoyance and curved his hands low on Sandy’s hips,
pushing her as far away as he could and stepping further back, hands dropping
heavily at her sides. “No. God, Sandy, even if I was still interested in you -
which I’m not - I’m seeing someone else now. So you need to back the fuck off.”
Sandy’s eyes widened in surprise and shock, maybe a flash of hurt, but Jared
couldn’t feel so guilty. She hadn’t cared before when she hurt him, why would
she care now? “You... I haven’t heard you were with someone! Who is she? How
could she possibly be better than me?”
Jared’s eyebrows lifted in disbelief and he rolled his eyes. “Jensen is a
thousand times better than you. He’s gorgeous and he loves me for me and he
doesn’t want me just because I’m the most popular boy in school. So get off
your fucking high horse, Sandy, and leave me alone.”
The shock was pretty damn clear on Sandy’s face but it was the noise behind him
that had Jared reacting, spinning to find the boy in question.
~~
Finding Sandy pressed up against Jared wasn’t as shocking as Jensen thought it
might be, it should have been expected, but it did make his heart sink and his
stomach roll unpleasantly. Until, of course, Jared pushed her away and told her
off and came out to her. Not just coming out, he’d named Jensen as the person
he was with and Jensen gasped because he honestly hadn’t truly believed.
Now though, well, there was no denying it. It was one thing for Jared to be
touchy-feely with him - it wasn’t even that rare for Jared - but to tell his
ex-girlfriend that he was dating him... there was no taking that back. Jensen’s
heart lurched into overtime and he smiled slowly at Jared, quickening his steps
to cross the hallway and all but jump into Jared’s arms.
“Thank you,” Jensen whispered, arms tightening around Jared’s shoulders.
“Jared, you are not gay,” Sandy half gasped but Jensen didn’t look toward her.
It was nicer to soak into the warmth of Jared’s arms sliding tight around him.
“Trust me, I know this.”
Jensen bit his lip to keep from laughing but Jared wasn’t as successful,
chuckling into Jensen’s hair then slowly pulling back. He leaned into the heat
of Jared’s body pressed against his side and let his head rest on Jared’s
shoulder, smiling as innocently as he could muster at the girl as his hand slid
back into Jared’s jean pocket, squeezing his ass.
Beside him Jared squirmed and tightened his fingers around Jensen’s waist. “I’m
bi, Sandy. Or really, I’m pretty much just Jensen sexually because, fuck, have
you seen this boy? He’s sex on legs. How the hell could I possibly resist
that?”
Sandy looked maybe a little scandalized but Jensen didn’t really care so much.
Jared was his, Sandy could stuff it. “But... Jared...” Sandy’s wide eyes
fluttered rapidly, her mouth open still in shock and Jensen lost out on the
laugh he was fighting against.
“Sorry, Sandy, you know how it goes with Jared. He always gets what he wants.”
Jensen smirked and turned, catching Jared’s hand and dragging him roughly down
the hall. The urge to be all over Jared was pretty damn strong and Jensen was
about to show his boyfriend he wasn’t the only one who got exactly what he
wanted.
***** Chapter 3 *****
Jensen was more than a little relieved that Chad was ditching school. Usually
he felt a little guilty when the kid left campus or dragged Jensen with him but
right now? It was perfect timing. Because Jensen wanted Jared alone. Or as
alone as he could get on school campus. Which was currently the half-seclusion
of the space under the football bleachers.
“Hey,” Jared sounded nervous, which surprised Jensen because he thought his
intentions would be pretty damn obvious considering the way he was dragging
Jared across the field and finally under the narrow space between the bleachers
and the back fence. “Was um, that not okay? I - should I not have told Sandy?”
“I love that you told Sandy,” Jensen murmured and spun, pushing Jared up
against the fence and leaning into the heat of his body. “I love that she’ll
probably tell everyone. And now they’ll all know who you belong to. Me.”
Jared smiled and settled his hands on Jensen’s hips, rocking him forward so
their bodies could slowly roll together. “Oh yeah? Well good. Because I want
everyone to know you belong to me, too. I see the way people look at you now,
like they’d love nothing more than to spread you out, touch you all over. But
I’m the only one who gets to claim you. You’re mine.”
As it turned out, a possessive Jared was a very hot thing. Jensen shuddered
with the pleasure of his deep words and he pressed forward, tilting up to slant
his lips over Jared’s in a long, deep kiss. Jensen moaned into the kiss as
Jared’s fingers easily dipped under the bottom of his t-shirt, ghosting touches
over the edge of his tattoo. He was pretty sure Jared had yet to learn just how
far the tattoo spread and he kind of couldn’t wait for that day.
Except right now he had better things in mind. Like tasting every inch of
Jared’s skin that he could. “You would claim me in front of all of them,
wouldn’t you?” Jensen murmured as Jared’s tongue drew back, tracing over the
edge of his lip ring.
“Fuck yeah I would,” Jared half laughed to words, rocking his hips into
Jensen’s.
Knowing he had already gotten Jared mostly hard made the pressure in Jensen’s
jeans a little unbearable. He kissed his way down along Jared’s jaw, tasting
the smooth warm skin, memorizing Jared’s taste. It was almost a little
shocking, to think he was actually experiencing this. Not so long ago it had
seemed like an impossibility and now Jensen never wanted to stop.
He slipped his hands forward under Jared’s shirt, touching him like he hadn’t
been able to the night before. His fingers ghosting along the boy’s cut abs,
that impressive football-built body that Jensen was kind of addicted to
already. “You know what I want to do?” Jensen whispered against the edge of
Jared’s ear, sucking the lobe out and dipping his fingers down below Jared’s
jeans.
When the boy shuddered against him Jensen felt the giddy rush of power. He
might portray the image of confidence physically now but here, with Jared, he
actually felt that confidence. Jared wanted him, completely, and Jensen had
never felt more sure of his actions. Especially when Jared gripped his ass
tight and squeezed, rocking their hips just a little harder together. “What do
you want to do?”
Jensen worked his hand between them and freed the button from Jared’s jeans,
the air catching in his throat for just a moment. His tongue slid out to trace
along the shell of Jared’s ear and he moaned softly, rolling his hips forward
then drawing back to tug the boy’s zipper free. “I wanna get on my knees, right
here in front of you, and suck you off. Wanna fill my mouth with your cock,
Jared? I’ve been dreaming about it for so long.”
A low groan rose through Jared at Jensen’s words. How could it not? Jensen
somehow had become sex on two legs and Jared had no idea how he even learned to
speak like that. But the mental image of stuffing Jensen’s mouth with his cock
was too good to pass up on and Jared’s hand snapped up to curl in thick dark
blonde hair.
“Fuck, Jensen,” Jared moaned the boy’s name and rocked up into the heat of
Jensen’s hand snaking down beneath his boxers. “Wanna fuck your mouth, your
lips are gonna feel so good around me.”
“I really can’t wait,” Jensen murmured against his ear once more and pulled
back, giving Jared a momentary smirk then sinking to his knees.
Jared’s gaze dropped instantly, and he leaned back against the fence to try and
keep the dizzy rush of pleasure from knocking him from his feet. Jensen’s green
eyes sparkled as they turned up to him, his kiss swollen lips full and pouting,
the soft caress of his fingers as he gently pulled Jared free of his boxers and
stroked the full length of him.
The way Jensen stared so greedily at him, eyes wide, tongue dragging over his
lips, was enough to make Jared’s cock twitch in interest. He’d never been
stared at quite like that before. Sure, he’d had blowjobs before, but it hadn’t
ever really looked like the person providing them wanted to give them. There
was no doubt that Jensen wanted to do this and Jared’s fingers curled into a
fist through the locks of silky hair.
“Do it, Jen,” Jared growled low in his throat, pulling Jensen closer and
rocking his hips up. “Suck me down like you want to.”
Jensen damn near whimpered, reaching out to clutch Jared’s thighs and drag him
close. His lips parted along the head of Jared’s cock, smearing pre-come over
the plump swell of his mouth. Jensen looked sinful like that, his eyes closing,
pleasure clouding his features, and Jared couldn’t help a slow thrust forward
just to take more of the tight wet heat of the boy’s mouth. No one had ever
touched Jensen like this and it was just as hot to think that now as it had
been the night before.
“Fuck, god,” Jared moaned, his fingers tightening in Jensen’s hair, his hips
rocking just a little deeper. Jensen simply took it, allowed it, wanted it, and
Jared tested the boy’s limits. Even if Jensen had never done this before, he
didn’t hesitate now. He relaxed his mouth and let Jared in further, tongue
working along the underside of his cock in slow sweeps.
When the cool metal of Jensen’s lip piercing brushed over the pulsing heat of
his cock Jared pulled back and free, gripping himself at the base so he could
trail the next drop of pre-come over Jensen’s lips once more.
“You’re a natural,” Jared whispered, the words so deep they vibrated his chest.
“How’d you get so good?”
Jensen smirked and flicked his tongue over the slit of Jared’s cock, rolling
his shoulders up in a shrug. “Chad says I was just made for cock sucking.”
Before Jared could figure out how Chad might know something like that, Jensen
was parting his lips and sucking him in once more. This time he controlled the
bob of his head, sinking nearly to the curl of Jared’s fingers and pulling up,
picking up speed with the next drop down.
Jared’s head dropped back against the fence, hips snapping up into the heat of
Jensen’s mouth. As it turned out, being buried in Jensen’s mouth was better
than he ever could have imagined. The boy’s tongue worked in slow circles
around his cock, caressing his skin with each thrust in, pull out. Jensen’s
nails dug into the back of his thighs, holding on, pulling closer and Jared
tugged at Jensen’s hair as his orgasm rose.
Then Jensen moaned around Jared’s cock, the vibrating around his skin better
than just the wet heat from before. He was balancing on the edge, so close he
could barely breathe. Then Jensen lifted his hand and rolled along his balls
and Jared came so hard his vision temporarily darkened.
“Jesus Christ, Jen,” Jared moaned far too loud, only vaguely hoping no one was
around to hear, his grip tugging hard enough on Jensen’s hair it had to hurt.
But Jensen simply moaned, drinking down his release, and Jared forced his eyes
down enough to watch Jensen’s hand shove roughly down under his jeans. The boy
shuddered against him just as Jared’s cock pulled free and Jared bit his lip to
keep from coming all over again. Jensen stroking himself to completion as he
sucked Jared off? And here Jared had thought the boy couldn’t get any hotter.
“You’re like, fucking, walking sex.” Jared huffed and hastily stuffed his
softening cock back in before dropping down onto the grass in front of Jensen.
The boy blinked blearily and smiled at him, a look far too innocent to match
the smears of come still lingering on his lips. “Oh Christ,” Jared grunted and
tugged Jensen forward, kissing him hard, thrusting his tongue forward to chase
all the lingering wisps of himself painting the boy’s mouth.
They slowly sank back down onto the ground - Jensen was going to get dirty but
Jared really could care less - and Jared hovered half over the boy as he kissed
them both breathless. When he finally pulled back Jensen was panting, clutching
his arm hard.
“So... that was good then?” Jensen asked quietly, reaching up to drag his thumb
over Jared’s lower lip.
Jared arched a brow and smirked. “Made you come in your jeans by shooting down
your throat Jen, pretty sure that means it was fucking epic.”
“One of these days we might actually take our clothes off when we fool around.”
Jensen laughed and pulled Jared close again.
Before their lips could touch though, Jared spoke. “Let’s make a deal that you
never say Chad’s name while we’re having any type of sex again, okay?”
Jensen laughed and nodded. “That mean I shouldn’t tell you about how he helped
me practice?”
Jared decided to kiss Jensen instead of find out if that was true or not. There
were some things he’d really rather not know.
~~
“I just don’t get why we had to invite him.”
The amount of times Jensen had heard something along those lines over the last
few weeks was pretty much epic. It didn’t really matter who was saying it,
Jared or Chad, one or the other was always complaining about the other one
being invited along to whatever they were doing. Which was currently hanging
out in Jensen’s basement, watching movies on the big screen. His parents were
out with the Padaleckis, would be late no doubt, and Jared had wanted to spend
some time together.
But Chad had already demanded Jensen hang out with him for the evening -
apparently he was being a neglectful friend - and Jensen figured the best
solution was just to have both boys over. After all, Jared and Chad used to
hang out before. Of course now Jensen felt a little like the rope in a game of
tug of war. They weren’t literally pulling him apart but sometimes it really
felt like it.
Jensen was gonna have to do something with Chad soon, just them, because the
boy really had been a great friend over the summer and he didn’t want to ditch
him just because Jared had finally pulled his head out of his ass and realized
how he felt. Speaking of Jared, the boy’s arms were around his middle, holding
him between his spread legs. They were leaning against the back of the couch
and Jared’s lips were teasing along his neck and over his ear as he spoke.
“It’s just,” Jared continued, his tongue tracing the uppermost curve of black
ink on Jensen’s neck. “Thought it could just be me and you tonight, you know?
No parents around. Alone in your bedroom...”
Oh god. It wasn’t like Jensen couldn’t feel Jared’s cock through his jeans
pressing right up against his ass. He knew what his boyfriend was thinking and
he wanted the same thing. They hadn’t been able to find time for just them in
an empty house since getting together. Sure, his parents had eased up a bit
once Jensen started spending more time with Jared again - who was still a
little angel in their eyes, go figure - but there was only so much they could
risk doing with everyone home and the locks on their bedroom doors the only
protection.
“Jared,” Jensen half groaned quietly, trying to focus on the movie on the
screen. There was some half naked girl screaming in bad falsetto and running
from some crazy psycho with a stupid mask. It wasn’t really holding Jensen’s
interest. Especially not when Jared’s leg hooked over his and spread Jensen’s
just a little wider, his hips rocking teasingly against Jensen’s ass.
“Thought maybe... you’d let me act out the rest of your fantasies tonight.”
Jared breathed against his ear, biting at the lobe around the dark metal
piercing. “Maybe... sliding my fingers up in you? Or burying my cock in your
tight little hole. I know how much you want it Jensen, you’ve practically
begged for it before. So... why don’t you send Chad home and we can go
upstairs?”
This was really unfair. Jensen didn’t want to be an asshole friend who blew
Chad off because he wanted to get laid. He knew how much that hurt and after
all the things Chad had done for him over the last few months, the boy deserved
better. But Jared’s words were kind of like fire trickling down his spine and
Jensen wasn’t entirely sure if he could ignore them. Already he was so hard in
his jeans it was painful to move.
So he cleared his throat and turned his gaze to Chad, hoping the basement was
dark enough to hide the flush on his cheeks. The boy had a half smile on his
face, eyes fixed on the screen, and Jensen tackled with the guilt once more. He
sighed and tilted his gaze back to Jared, only barely catching his eyes as he
twisted. “I can’t just blow him off Jared, that’s not fair. After the movie.”
“But our parents might be home then, or soon after. It wouldn’t be enough
time,” Jared insisted quietly, fingers tucking under Jensen’s shirt and teasing
along his stomach. “You really want to wait? Even longer? Even after you’ve
been waiting all these years?”
Talk about unfair leverage. Of course Jared would use that against him. Well,
Jensen was not Jared. He could think with more than his dick - and yeah, he
knew Jared was more than that but right now his boyfriend wasn’t doing such a
good job at proving that. “You’re gonna end up crashing here anyway Jared, our
parents won’t check on us. We’ll lock the door and have all the time we need.”
“But you’ll have to be quiet.” By this point Jared was nearly whining, which
would have been funny if Jensen could make any more room for emotions. He
couldn’t, Jared’s hot breath on his neck and the steady rub roll of his hips
was far too consuming. “God Jen, don’t you know how badly I wanna hear you? I
wanna know what it sounds like when you beg for more, when you plead for my
cock in you.”
All the air shuddered out of Jensen’s lungs and he closed his eyes, rolling
back against Jared because he couldn’t help it. His hands clamped over Jared’s
knees, clenching tightly like that could ground him. “Jared...” Now it was
Jensen’s turn to whine. How much more could he possibly take?
“Jesus, Jen, do you know how much I want to be buried in you?” Jared whispered
and flicked open the button of Jensen’s jeans, apparently not in the slightest
bit phased by Chad sitting a couple feet from them on the other end of the
couch. “I dream about it. I dream... of fucking up into you, feeling your body
spread open around me, pulling me in as you clench. But you know what I want to
do before all of that?”
The idea of breathing was starting to get a little impossible and Jensen
couldn’t help his panting. He couldn’t look at Chad either because he didn’t
want to know if the boy was aware exactly what Jared was doing to him. “W-
what?”
“I want to spread you out on your stomach, and map out every inch of your
tattoo with my tongue. I want to taste every inch of it and then finish with my
tongue sliding over your hole and tasting you. Can you imagine my tongue
tracing your hole, Jensen?” Jared punctuated his words with the slide of his
thumb over the pre-come forming on Jensen’s dick and that, apparently, was
Jensen’s limit.
“Chad!” He nearly spat the name as he jumped up, fumbling back and bumping into
the coffee table. Chad looked over at him, clearly amused at something, and
Jensen ducked down to hide his face and grab the remote. “Sorry, sorry, you’ve
gotta go. Um, I- we’ll hang out tomorrow, okay? I’ll call you. Just you and me.
We’ll go wherever you want.”
As he flicked off the TV the room fell into darkness and Jensen swiftly crossed
to the stairwell, hitting the light switch, keeping his back to the couch. He
could go forever without Chad knowing just how turned on he was.
“You owe me twenty bucks,” Jared said with a laugh and stood.
It took Jensen a minute to realize that Chad was laughing in return and wait,
what? He spun to the two boys, watching Chad pull a twenty from his wallet and
hand it over to Jared. “I totally thought he’d hold out longer!”
“Are you kidding me? Did you hear what I’m gonna do to him? Half hour to cave,
my ass,” Jared laughed once more and tucked the money away, turning to Jensen
with a grin that vanished pretty quick when he saw the look on Jensen’s face.
“Jen... don’t jump to conclusions.”
“You bet on me?” Jensen pursed his lips. It was a whole lot easier to not be as
turned on as he turned his gaze between Jared and Chad slowly. “You bet how
long you could fuck around with me before I made Chad leave?”
“Actually, he tried to get me not to come over at all,” Chad informed, stooping
down to grab his coat and pull it on. “He even offered me some money. But I was
the one who suggested the wager. I’m a little disappointed you couldn’t hold
out longer Jen, thought we worked on those patience issues.”
Jensen scowled and punched Chad’s arm the minute he got close. “So you just sat
there and listened to Jared get me all worked up to see if I could hold out?
You’re such a sick perv!” Jensen punched him once more for good measure then
spun to Jared. “And you! All some bet. God. This is why you two always suck.”
With that he spun and headed up the steps, making a beeline for the next set so
he could reach the second floor and slam his bedroom door behind him. He wasn’t
really all that mad, not really, because this was so typical of Jared and Chad,
but he was definitely annoyed. And kind of embarrassed. Chad heard all those
things Jared said and it was supposed to be a private thing between them.
“Jensen...” Jared murmured softly moments before he opened the bedroom door. Of
course he’d know Jensen wouldn’t lock it. Damn, Jensen was so weak when it came
to Jared. “Don’t be mad at me.”
“Don’t you ever get tired of being an asshole, Jared?” Jensen shot back,
dropping down on the edge of the bed to pull off his socks, anything to keep
from looking at the pout Jared was sure to be sporting. Jared was exceptionally
good at getting his way, as he proved earlier.
“I wasn’t trying to be an asshole,” Jared protested, stepping into the room the
rest of the way and closing the door behind hm. Jensen could hear the lock
click in place in the pause between his words and that probably sealed his
fate. “I really just wanted Chad gone. I wanted just us tonight. It’s not just
us very often. And hey, I’m twenty bucks richer, so I promise to take you to
Ihop in the morning for as many pancakes as you can eat.”
Jensen’s lips twitched in a smile but he kept his gaze down and stood, fiddling
with the open fly of his jeans and pulling down slowly. “You said all those
things... and Chad was listening.”
“I doubt it Jen, Chad’s straight, duh.” Jared laughed softly and stepped
closer. “I meant every single thing I said. It’s what I want to do, what I’ve
been thinking about for so long now.”
Apparently staying angry at Jared was about as possible as it had been before
the summer and the fall out and everything. Which was not possible at all. “You
really want to... lick? Down there? That’s something you’d enjoy?”
“Hell yeah I would,” Jared murmured and finally stepped against his side,
hooking his fingers in Jensen’s belt loop and tugging down slowly. “I want to
claim every inch of you Jensen. Right now. Been waiting too long.”
“Have you ever fucked a guy before?” Jensen blurted out the question, gaze
finally snapping up to Jared because even if the boy tried to lie, he’d be able
to see through it in a heartbeat. “Tell me, honestly, have you?”
“Not all the way, no.” Jared shook his head slowly and didn’t break his gaze.
“Put fingers in a boy once but he didn’t like it.” Jared shrugged and pulled a
little harder on the jeans, letting them fall to the ground. “Didn’t really
turn me on that much anyway. Not that way with you though. I get off more than
once a day just thinking about sliding my fingers up in you.”
Jensen’s heart was racing all over again and he swallowed thickly, stepping out
of his jeans. Yeah, just like that, he was turned on all over again. “You won’t
change your mind after, right?”
“Oh... Jen,” Jared sighed and curled his fingers over the hem of Jensen’s
shirt, slowly working up over his abs. “Don’t you know? I’m in love with you.
That’s not gonna change once I fuck you.”
Jared’s words sparked through Jensen’s mind and he stared up at his boyfriend,
eyes wide, arms lifting automatically as Jared tugged his shirt off and tossed
it toward his laundry basket. “You’re... in love with me?”
The smile on Jared’s face softened and he dipped down, capturing Jensen’s lips
in a soft kiss, fingers slipping under Jensen’s briefs and slowly lifting then
dropping. “Yeah, Jensen, I’m really, kind of crazily in love with you. Now, lay
down. I want to see you naked.”
Fuck. Jensen was so screwed. And not just in the literal sense, which was
clearly not so far off from happening. The idea alone had him lurching forward,
fumbling to the bed and dropping down on his back. He stared greedily up at
Jared as the boy worked his way out of the rest of his clothing and yeah, they
shouldn’t have waited so long to let this happen. Jared was miles of gorgeous
tanned skin and Jensen couldn’t stop staring.
“Enjoying the view?” Jared smirked, rocking his hips steadily from side to side
for a moment then stepping forward. “Flip onto your stomach. I’ve never gotten
to admire that tattoo the way I’ve wanted to, you know.”
“You keep mentioning that,” Jensen mumbled but he did as he was told, rolling
onto his stomach and tilting his head to peer over at Jared. The boy seemed to
be frozen in spot, stuck staring or something, and Jensen held his breath.
“That bad, huh?”
“What?” Jared laughed softly and stepped forward, kneeling on the edge of the
bed, sliding down a moment later. “Fuck no, Jen. You’re so... god, you’re drop
dead gorgeous and you have no idea. That blows my fucking mind.”
Jensen’s eyes fluttered closed with a soft hum as Jared’s fingers lifted to
trail along his tattoo. Each little caress mapping over dark ink tribal curves
had Jensen’s skin prickling, the pleasure building so steadily up in him it was
impossible to ignore. Already he felt lightheaded, out of breath, and that was
simply from Jared’s small touches and constant stare. How the hell was he going
to last until the actual sex?
“You might be killing me,” Jensen mumbled, burying his head in the fold of his
arms as if that would ease of some of the embarrassment he felt from being so
easily affected. As it was, his hips were rolling shamelessly down in the
mattress and every little moment of friction was only adding to the pleasure.
“Haven’t even started yet,” Jared breathed and dipped down, tongue flicking
out. The first touch of moist heat along his skin had Jensen shuddering and
jerking back and up into the touch. “Hmm, thought it might taste different or
something.”
Jensen swallowed a laugh and rolled his lips together, fingers dragging over
the blanket beneath him. “Because tattoos usually taste like...?”
“Wouldn’t know. You’re the only one I’ve hooked up with that’s been inked.”
Jared laughed quietly and shifted.
In the next moment his boyfriend was straddling the back of his thighs and
Jensen shuddered all over again. How could he not? Already Jared’s firm weight
was pressing down into his back and it was better than anything Jensen ever
could have imagined. Pleasure sparked along his veins and he rolled his hips
down once more as Jared’s tongue moved over his skin in a slower, longer sweep.
True to his word, Jared took his time tracing out every curve of Jensen’s
tattoo. He swept along the lines, the curves, like an echo of the original ink
when it was completed weeks before. But there was none of the stinging pain,
just the overwhelming pleasure, and Jensen clutched the blanket tighter to keep
from bucking completely off the bed. Each drag of Jared’s tongue over his skin
made the air hitch in his lungs and Jensen was so hard the following slow roll
of his hips down onto the bed was almost painful.
“Jared,” he finally gasped, not quite sure he could handle any more of the
teasing. “Please. Please, Jared. God.”
“What do you want, baby?” Jared all but growled, working his legs between
Jensen’s and dragging his fingers down his sides. “Want my tongue lower on your
body? Want to feel me tasting your ass?”
“Fuck, yes,” Jensen groaned and spread his legs wider, giving Jared more room
to move. “Stop teasing.”
“I think you like my teasing.” The grin with Jared’s words was obvious and
Jensen’s lips twitched in a smile as well, just because that was the way Jared
affected him he supposed.
“I think you’re ego needs adjusting.” Jensen tried to shoot the words back but
well, he sounded a little breathless and way past the point of turned on.
Because he was.
Jared’s answering laugh was warm air against his skin, just along his ass, and
Jensen moaned and squirmed. Fuck, Jared was taking the teasing thing to all new
levels. Just as Jensen was about to protest, plead for more, beg for Jared to
do something those long thin fingers were digging into his ass and spreading
him apart and Jensen’s eyes snapped open.
It felt so different from all the fooling around before. He was more exposed,
spread open for Jared to examine as he wanted, and Jensen was irrationally
nervous. Being open like that wasn’t something he was used to and the longer
Jared kept staring, the more Jensen squirmed with the rising nerves.
“Jared. Stop staring, you’re freaking me out,” Jensen grumbled and lifted his
head, straining back to try and see the expression on Jared’s face. What if it
was disgusting to him now or something? How would Jensen ever live down that
humiliation?
“Seriously, Jen? You really have no idea how hot this is. How hot you are. I
have no idea how you don’t know this.” Jared sounded just as breathless as
Jensen felt and it made everything warm in him.
It also eased the nerves and Jensen wet his lips, squirming back into the touch
of Jared’s fingers stroking along the inside of his ass. “You’re not like,
freaking out or anything right?”
“Freaking out?” Jared huffed and in the next moment dipped down, tongue sliding
out to trail the full length of Jensen’s crack, brushing just barely along the
tight puckered hole.
Jensen gasped in shock, tried not to thrust back into the heat of Jared’s
tongue on instinct. The buzzing of pleasure was back in full swing, blurring
his vision, causing his blood to race in his veins as Jared’s tongue laved over
his entrance time and again. Jensen had never felt anything like it, the slick
heat soaking into his skin, and his squirming picked up speed all over again.
The friction was nearly too much, almost sending him over the edge.
“Oh, Jesus, Jared,” Jensen gasped and arched his hips up as Jared’s tongue
delved a little deeper, pressing against the tight muscle to try and breach
forward. “I can’t... I need. Jared, please. More. Please.”
“So needy,” Jared murmured, that smirk was still there, Jensen could feel it
against his skin. “You want me to stretch you open? Want my fingers in you?”
Jensen flushed at the though and pushed up onto his knees, giving Jared no
choice but to move with him. Strong fingers gripped his ass, spreading him
further apart, and his tongue once more slid along Jensen’s entrance. This time
his finger joined the action, spreading Jensen open with spit slick skin, his
tongue sliding up to tease just along the inside of Jensen’s hole.
“Fuck,” Jensen hissed, closing his eyes at the following wave of pleasure
tingling along every inch of him. He was completely going to lose it, right
there rutting against his bed spread, but he didn’t so much care. There were
worse things than coming at the feel of Jared’s tongue and finger sliding up
into him.
Then that wet heat was pulling back and Jensen whimpered, rocking back to find
that pressure again because he was nearly desperate for it. Jared laughed
softly and let his hand drop heavily on Jensen’s ass in a small slap. “So
you’re basically a slut. You know that right?”
Jensen huffed, trying to laugh but mostly just moaning, and shoved up onto his
elbows, body bending so his head was resting against his forearms. He was kind
of confirming Jared’s words, displaying himself like the proper little slut,
but at least it was exclusive for his boyfriend - who was in love with him.
Holy fuck. “Drawer. There’s, lube. I- no condoms. Do you have one?”
“Don’t worry about it, I’m clean.” Jared pulled his finger free, causing Jensen
to hiss, and quickly dove forward to tug the nightstand open and pull the
bottle of lube free. Jensen tilted his head enough to watch Jared hold up the
half full bottle and smirk.
Rolling his eyes, Jensen wiggled his ass impatiently. “Shut up and fuck me,
Jared.”
“Slutty and needy and demanding. We’re gonna have to work on your patience.”
Jared dipped in to press a kiss to his shoulder before sliding back between
Jensen’s spread legs once more. “So you want your first time on your hands and
knees like this? No romantic notions of us being able to gaze lovingly into
each others’ eyes or something?”
Jensen groaned as Jared slipped his finger forward once more, adding a second
within moments. Apparently he was taking advantage of the fact that Jensen
quite often fingered himself. “Want...” Jensen moaned and rocked his hips back
into the slightest sting of Jared’s longer fingers spreading him open in slow
twist pulls. “Want on my back. Just, this now. I mean, god damnit Jared.”
“You’re eloquent, too,” Jared teased softly. After a beat he slipped a third
finger forward but Jensen was instantly distracted from the burning stretch as
Jared spread over his body, tongue slipping out to trace along his tattoo once
more.
It was maybe a little rushed, sloppy, the way Jared was spreading and working
him open but Jensen was caught simply on the mind-spinning tingle, the heat of
Jared’s body, the brush of his cock against the back of Jensen’s thigh as he
moved. It was the suggestion of more and Jensen was nearly trembling, clenching
his muscles around Jared’s fingers just to hold him there, as deep as his
fingers could get.
Then Jared’s wrist twisted, pushed further up, and those smooth fingertips were
ghosting along Jensen’s prostate in a way he’d never quite been able to reach
when working himself open. Jensen’s lips parted on a loud moan of his
boyfriend’s name, his entire body lurching back into the touch for the steady
plead of more, more, more. He hadn’t realized before just how intense it could
be, how consuming, and he suddenly wanted every single thing that Jared could
possibly give him.
“Now, please, Jared,” Jensen gasped, not even caring if Jared was going to
tease him again about being slutty and needy. By this point, Jared had to want
him just as badly; he could nearly feel the boy trembling behind him.
“Fuck yeah,” Jared grunted and pulled his fingers free, sliding back enough to
shove Jensen over onto the bed. Wasting no time, Jensen quickly sprawled out on
his back and spread his legs around Jared, propping up on his elbows to blink
bleary eyed up at his boyfriend. Jared was stroking slick shiny lube over his
cock, his eyes closed for a moment before they were forced open and fixed on
Jensen, darker than he’d ever seen them before. “Gonna fuck you so hard you’ll
never want anyone else. No one will ever be better for you.”
Jensen swallowed the thick lump of emotion that crawled up and lodged in his
throat. There was definitely a promise to Jared’s words, a truth that Jensen
wouldn’t really ever be able to deny. Because when it came down to it, he’d
always want Jared. He always had. Even when he tried to pretend like he didn’t
need the boy in his life he’d still waited, holding on to some hope that they’d
come back together in the end, somehow.
“Tell me you’ll never want anyone else,” Jared whispered as he crawled up
between Jensen’s legs, dipping down to kiss over the swirl of black ink
covering Jensen’s collarbone. “Tell me it will always be me.”
Part of Jensen wanted to tease Jared - who was being the beggy, needy one now?
- but he simply dropped flat onto his back and stroked his fingers through
Jared’s thick golden hair. “Just you, Jared. Always you. Forever.”
Jared pulled back to give Jensen a warm smile before he was shifting once more,
drawing Jensen’s legs up to his shoulders and lining himself up. “Gonna burn a
bit,” Jared murmured, stroking a near tender caress down Jensen’s side. “I’m
just gonna fuck down into you in one swift movement, I think it’ll be better in
the long run. But then I’ll give you time to adjust. Okay? So just um, try and
stay relaxed and keep breathing.”
Jensen managed half a snort, a retort building on his lips - something about
Jared sounding like a really fucked up teacher or something - but he barely
managed to form part of the first word and Jared was suddenly there. Just as he
said, he slid forward in one hard, sharp thrust that nearly lifted Jensen’s
body completely off the bed. It did burn, the stretch strange and
uncomfortable, and Jensen gasped and squeezed his eyes shut. The fingers before
could never have really prepared him for the sudden oh-so-full, enough to have
Jensen’s body tensing up out of his control.
Everything blurred for a long few minutes, Jensen forcing himself to take deep,
measured breaths, evening out the tension and discomfort. He held onto the
knowledge that it would get better, it wouldn’t hurt so badly, if he just rode
out the initial sting. Then Jared’s light touch was registering through his
senses, fingers ghosting along his skin, slipping between them to stroke slowly
over his softening cock, and Jensen vaguely began to pay attention to the soft
murmurs leaving his boyfriend’s lips.
“So gorgeous like this, spread out for me,” Jared spoke quietly through the
slow brush of his lips along Jensen’s jaw, across his cheek. “So tight too.
Fuck, Jen, never felt something so tight and hot. Could just spend forever
here, buried in you. Love you so fucking much, you have no idea.”
Jensen moaned softly and experimentally rocked his hips, repeating the slow
swivel with a little more force when he realized it didn’t hurt. Actually, now
that the initial burning was gone, the fullness wasn’t really that
uncomfortable and Jensen blinked his eyes open, meeting Jared’s lust dark gaze
easily. “Love you, too,” he whispered, lips twitching in a small smile before
he rocked his hips down against Jared’s once more, heart skipping a beat when
Jared moaned and reflexively rolled forward. “Do it, fuck me. Want you to make
me yours.”
Their eyes held for just a beat longer then Jared was drawing back, nearly all
the way out, and thrusting hard down. Jensen listened to the steady slap of
their skin then closed his eyes, arching his neck down into the bed as his body
curved up to meet each of Jared’s quick thrusts. It was amazing, more than
Jensen thought it would be, and the weight and heat of Jared moving over him
was enough to suck all the air from Jensen’s lungs and leave him shaking with
each hard quick slam of their bodies.
Jared's angle shifted, his hands over Jensen's thighs gripping tighter as their
bodies connected hard and loud. The next series of quick deep thrusts drove
right into Jensen's prostate and he moaned loudly, riding out the ripple of
sensation with another hard arch into his lover's body. And Jared held that
spot, almost expertly driving into it over and over.
"Jared, Jay, oh God," Jensen chanted soft, breathless praises as his nails
dragged up Jared's shoulders and buried in his hair. "So close. Jesus, yes,
right there."
A brief smile played across Jared's lips then he was dipping forward, bending
Jensen's body even further so their lips could crash collide together. As
Jared's tongue thrust forward his hips picked up a feverish pace and Jensen
could no longer hold back. He'd been holding on too long, the fact he'd lasted
to this point was actually kind of impressive.
It wasn’t really surprising to him that his vision completely blurred and his
body arched almost unnaturally up into Jared’s as his orgasm hit with painful
intensity. All the air rushed out of his lungs in one harsh whoosh, his fingers
grasping Jared’s hair so tightly it had to be painful. Though the low, long
moan falling from Jared’s lips didn’t seem to speak of any discomfort. The
boy’s hips drove jerky thrusts forward into him and Jensen could distantly feel
the warm rush of Jared’s release filling him.
After what felt like a lifetime, though was probably only a couple of
completely blissed out minutes, Jared collapsed onto Jensen’s chest, letting
the boy’s legs slowly sink down to their sides. Jared’s breath was too hot on
the sensitive skin of his neck with each exhale and Jensen sighed in
contentment, letting his fingers soothe gently back through Jared’s hair then
down his neck.
“So amazing,” Jensen whispered after a while, tilting to let his lips brush
along Jared’s temple. It was almost a little surreal, how he finally had this,
after so many years of dreaming of it. With that thought though came the
nagging fear that Jared would change his mind, that this all would have been
some game with Jensen’s virginity as the ultimate prize. And his shoulders
stiffened at the idea, his body tensing with the rise of nerves.
“Chad is gonna make fun of our schmoopy looks for days you know,” Jared
murmured and pulled back, dropping to Jensen’s side and looping an arm around
his middle. “We’ll have to get back at him by making out in front of him. All
the time.”
Jensen’s lips twitched in a small smile and he rolled to face Jared, reaching
up to tuck sweat damp hair behind his ear. “You’re gonna be mine always now,
right?”
“Couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.” Jared gave him a sleepy grin and ducked
in, rubbing their noses together. “Shoulda realized this before. Could have
been ravishing your tiny little body for years.”
“Oh god, you perv.” Jensen laugh and nuzzled closer, folding up against Jared
and grinning into his shoulder as the boy’s fingers slid down his back. “Now we
can fuck under the bleachers on lunch break.”
“And you call me the perv,” Jared teased but his voice was a notch deeper and
Jensen was pretty sure he loved it.
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