Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/2804834.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Underage, Rape/Non-Con
  Fandom:
      Supernatural
  Relationship:
      Gabriel/Sam_Winchester, Castiel/Dean_Winchester
  Character:
      Sam_Winchester, Dean_Winchester, John_Winchester, Gabriel_(Supernatural),
      Castiel, Lucifer, Michael_(Supernatural), Lilith_(Supernatural), Eve_
      (Supernatural)
  Additional Tags:
      Alternate_Universe_-_Slavery, Human_Castiel, Human_Gabriel, Torture,
      Submission, Beating, Collars, dom!Gabriel, Sub!Sam, Domestic_Fluff,
      College, Slow_Build
  Stats:
      Published: 2014-12-20 Completed: 2015-07-24 Chapters: 44/44 Words: 131897
****** The Postcards of Life ******
by darkroses
Summary
     Sam and Dean grew up in a world where each year one teenager from
     each school is selected to be a slave of the ruling family. The
     slavery is until the person turns 21, if they survive that long.
     How will Dean cope without Sam in his life anymore? How will Sam cope
     with being a slave?
***** Chapter 1 *****
The world was broken into small nations and within the world knowledge of the
supernatural was common. Sam and Dean live with their father in a country ruled
by the Novak family. The leader is Michael, who along with his brother Lucifer
were known for their brutal nature. Every year, at the end of the school year.
The royal family visited each of the high schools in their domain. A name was
drawn.
Whosever name was drawn became a slave to the Novak family until they reached
age 21. Most do not survive the first day. They are killed either by Michael or
Lucifer. Those that survive were used as servants around the house and the
females are used for breeding. This tradition was set down by the Novak’s late
father, who found it to be the preferred method of finding a spouse. A spouse
that would be loyal and remember their roots as a slave.
Sam and Dean moved around from village to village since their dad was a hunter.
They were poor and it was often a struggle for John to be able to feed both of
the boys. Dean was a senior this year and Sam was a freshman. The boys have
never had to deal with a drawing. Their dad had always made sure they changed
schools before that.
Dean was caught off guard when they were all crammed into the gym. He was
sitting near the back on the floor. He could see Sammy a few rows ahead. Sam
turned back to look at him. Dean gave Sam an uneasy smile and a nod. Sam smiled
back and ducked his head under his bangs. Dean shook his head and made a mental
note to cut Sam’s hair tonight even if he had to tie the kid down.
Dean watched in silence as Michael walked onto the gym floor. He had blond hair
and striking blue eyes. Dean thought about how if Michael wasn’t such a dick
then maybe he would actually be attractive. He also knew that both Michael and
Lucifer already had a spouse. He didn’t understand why they were still doing
this.
Michael smiled at the students. He cocked his head up proudly as he spoke,
“Children, today one of you will be selected to be a slave to the Novak family.
We understand that many of you may not want this gift but it is for the greater
good. It is for the good of the nation and for the good of our people. Your
sacrifice is honorable.”
Michael reached his hand into a bucket, which Dean guessed held all the names.
He watched as Michael slowly pulled a card out. Michael frowned at the name and
said, “Pity, it’s a boy. Ladies, you are excused.”
Dean watched as all the girls left the gym. He was scared. Once all the girls
left, Michael took a step forward with two guards on either side, “Samuel
Winchester.”
Dean watched in horror as Sam started crying and everyone moved away from him.
He watched the guards grab hold of his little brother. Sam was struggling in
their hold. Sam shouted and screamed through his sobs, “Please let me go. I
don’t want this.”
Dean stood up and tried to run towards Sam but he was held back by the teachers
and other students. He shouted to Sam as they pulled him out of the gym, “I
love you, Sammy.” But Dean wasn’t certain Sam could hear him over his own
screams.
++
They let Dean go home after that. Dean figured that death of sibling was the
official reason. The Novak family had no females, so it was pretty clear Sam
was going to be dead by the end of the day. It made Dean angry he couldn’t
understand why they wouldn’t just take him instead. Sam was young and innocent.
As far as Dean knew, he had never even gotten laid. Sam was going to die a
virgin and to Dean, that was a terrible loss.
Dean wandered his way down the street to the repair shop his dad was working at
to make money. They were taking a break from hunting to get some cash reserves
built up. Dean wiped his face of the tears that were falling from his walk. He
walked up behind his father who had his head buried under the hood of a car.
Tentatively Dean said, “Dad…”
John looked up from the engine and he put down his wrench. He could see that
Dean was upset but he didn’t know why. John asked with concern, “What’s wrong
Dean? Are you sick?”
Dean shook his head no and bit down on his bottom lip. He looked up at the
ceiling of the shop and took a deep breath. “They came today, Dad. They drew
Sammy’s name. He screamed, Dad. He screamed when they carried him away. I
didn’t even get to tell him goodbye.”
John picked up the wrench and fiddled with it for a moment. He didn’t know what
to say. He lost his wife in a fire and now he lost his youngest son. He knew in
his heart Sam was dead. There was very little room for doubt with that. If Sam
was nothing else, he was a rebel and he would fight being a slave with
everything he had.
John pulled Dean in for a hug and whispered into his son’s ear, “It’s going to
be okay, Dean. Sammy is going to go to Heaven. He’ll get to see your mom. He
never got to know her. I am sure he will love her.”
Dean sniffled and grabbed onto his dad. He brokenly said back, “He’s so young.
He doesn’t deserve this.”
John held Dean a little tighter and looked up at the clear blue sky, “I know,
son, but the good die young. Your brother was good. We must work to honor his
memory.”
Dean nodded and pulled back. He wiped the tears from his face. He bit down on
his lip and said, “It just sucks we have to wait until his 21st birthday to
even get his ashes back from these jackasses. We have to wait 7 years to put
Sammy to rest. It just isn’t right.”
Dean kicked the ground for a few minutes and then he said, “Sam wanted to stop
hunting. He wanted us to have a real home. He wanted to go to college. I think
we should do those things for Sam. I mean, he can’t go to college now, but I
can. I don’t know what for, but I can figure it out.”
John tossed down his wrench and said, “You’re right, we need to do what Sam
would have wanted. I am going to take the rest of the day off so we can mourn.”
++
Sam was loaded into a cage. It was small. He could neither lay down or stand
up. He curled his legs up against his chest and cried. He wanted his brother
and father back. He didn’t want to be a slave. Sam wished he had a chance to
say goodbye to Dean and his dad. He wanted to tell them that he loved them one
last time. But now he knew he would never get that chance.
Sam heard the truck he was loaded into a stop. There were other teenagers in
the truck with him in their own cages. He watched as one of the guards started
opening the cages. The guard, who Sam was certain did not have all of his teeth
shouted, “Get your worthless asses out of your cages. Your masters are
waiting.”
Sam pulled himself out of the cage. He walked out of the truck as he followed
the others. He stumbled slightly on the way out. Then he felt a sharp sting on
his back. He turned to see that another guard had hit him on the back with a
bull whip. He could feel the back of his shirt getting wet from where he was
hit. Sam knew he was bleeding.
He was so shocked that someone actually hit him with a whip that he couldn’t
move. He was frozen in place. He felt another hit to his back with the whip and
this time he stumbled forward. He watched as a guard lined them all up. Sam
tried to stand up straight but his back was throbbing and all he wanted to do
was hunch over.
Sam heard a guard shouting, “Today, all of you became worthless pieces of shit.
Today you became a slave. You will strip yourself of your clothing. Your heads
will be shaved to remind you that all freedom has been lost. Today, you will
learn what it is like to be nothing.” The guard paused and Sam glanced up at
him. The guard commanded, “Strip.”
Sam watched as those around him started to remove their clothing. He did not.
Sam knew how today was going to end. They were going to kill him and he decided
that if they were going to kill him then he could at least die with some
dignity. He knew he wasn’t going to die bowing down to them.
A guard approached Sam and hit him again. This time with a beaded flogger. Sam
grunted but remained standing. The guard pushed Sam to the ground and spit in
Sam’s face. Sam wiped away the spit and glared up at the guard. He guard raged
at Sam, “Strip.”
Sam started to stand but he felt two guards grab onto him. One on each arm.
They held him firmly in place. Sam shouted at the guard, “No.”
The guard chuckled and stepped forward. He walked right up to Sam and whispered
in his ear, “I am going to enjoy fucking your sweet ass and slitting your
throat when I am done.” Then the guard hit Sam hard in the stomach. Sam curled
over in pain. But he remained standing thanks to the guards holding him up. The
guard hit him many more times in the stomach, chest and face. Until Sam was
seeing stars and he was fairly certain he had a couple broken teeth.
Sam felt himself get dropped to the floor and all three of the guards started
to kick him. One of the guards yelled, “Fucking worthless piece of shit. If you
want us to stop you better start stripping.” Sam was starting to black out. He
couldn’t feel much anymore. The kicks were becoming muted on his body.
He thought about Dean tucking him in at night and his dad telling him he was a
man after he killed his first werewolf. At least Sam thought, he would get to
die a man and he wouldn’t die a coward. Right before everything went black, Sam
heard a strong voice, “Stop.”
***** Chapter 2 *****
Gabriel walked outside to see the new slaves. He knew Michael and Lucifer were
brutal. Most of the kids were lifeless drones as far as he was concerned. None
of them ever stood up to the norm. It annoyed Gabriel. He always figured that
if he wanted a spouse it would be someone who could actually think for
themselves, not one of these randomly drawn frightened and broken toys.
Today was different though, today Gabriel walked out onto the yard and was in
the process of witnessing the guards beat a young boy to death for refusing to
strip. The boy wasn’t backing down, which he could admire. Gabriel stared at
the boy for a moment. His face was broken up from getting hit, but the kid had
the prettiest hazel eyes he had ever seen. This was Gabriel’s other problem. He
was openly gay along with his twin brother Castiel.
Gabriel approached where the guards were beating the boy. He commanded, “Stop.”
The guards immediately stopped and Gabriel looked at the limp body of the
teenage boy. The boy’s clothes were tattered and bloody. It was clear even
before the beating that this child came from a poor family. Gabriel knew the
clothes were most likely hand-me-downs from an older brother or cousin.
He bent down and he put a hand on the boy’s neck. He felt a pulse which he
figured was a good sign. Gabriel carefully picked up the boy off the ground
with one hand under his neck and the other under his knees. He looked at the
guards and said, “I’ll be taking this one for my own personal use.”
The guard scuffed, “He wouldn’t even strip.”
Gabriel grinned and said, “And that is why I like him. Now, if you will excuse
me.”
++
Gabriel carried the boy up his quarters. His area of the mansion was like a
small apartment. It was decorated in rich reds and cream colors. He had a
decent size kitchen, dining room, living room, one and half bathrooms, but only
one bedroom. As he carried the boy in he wondered if that was going to become a
problem.
Gabriel laid the kid down in the bathtub while he tried to figure out what to
do now. He stared for a moment. He knew the kid didn’t want to take his clothes
off but Gabriel knew he had to take the clothes off to see the damage. Gabriel
sighed and walked over to the intercom. He buzzed one of the servants, who was
a slave, “Can you bring me small size clothing for male slave?”
The female voice on the other side buzzed back, “Yes Master.”
Gabe rolled his eyes and went back into the bathroom. He moistened a cloth and
started to wipe down the kid’s face. As he wiped the side of the kid’s face,
the kid’s eyes fluttered open. The kid was looking at him with blurry eyes.
Sam stared into the golden brown eyes of the man in front of him. He wasn’t
sure what happened or if he was dead and this was Heaven. He didn’t really
know. He coughed out some blood on his shirt and probably on the man. He
whispered, “Sorry,” as he realized he wasn’t dead. He was very much alive and
in pain.
Gabriel wiped the blood off his arm and gave a weak smile, “It’s alright. I’m
Gabriel. Gabriel Novak.”
Sam glanced up at Gabriel and looked around. He asked weakly, “So what are you
going to do? Drown me for not stripping?”
Gabriel frowned and shook his head, “No, I wasn’t planning on drowning you. I
was planning on protecting you from my asshat brothers. The guards were going
to kill you. I stopped them.”
Sam looked a Gabe for a moment longer before turning away. He weakly asked,
“Why? I don’t want to be a slave. I would rather die.”
Gabriel sighed, “We are all things we don’t want to be. Please let me help you.
I won’t hurt you.”
Sam tried to lean up and winced. He asked honestly, “What is in it for you?”
Gabriel brushed Sam’s hair out of his face. He was straight forward when he
answered, “I’m gay and I don’t want a broken drone for a spouse. When I saw you
willing to get beat to death because you didn’t just roll over to what they
wanted. I wanted you.”
Sam coughed again and asked, “So you are going to patch me up and rape me?”
Gabriel’s eyes got wide and he shook his head, “No never, that would kind of
ruin your spirit if I raped you. Not to mention, I am not into boys that had
barely hit puberty. You’re a little too young for me right now but it gives us
time to get to know each other.  If we don’t match when you are old enough, I
will keep you safe until you turn 21 and you can go home to your family.”
Sam nodded and said tentatively, “Okay, say I agree to play house with you and
see where that goes. Are you going to beat me?”
Gabriel shook his head, “No, I am not going to beat you. I am afraid you might
have some scars from what happened with the guards. Inside my glorified
apartment, you will be safe and free to do as you please. I will ask that you
clean as to not arouse suspicion. I have a one bed so it shouldn’t take too
much effort.” Gabe paused, “But outside of my little oasis, you will have to
act at least mildly submissive to keep my brothers off your back.”
Sam was quiet for a moment. Then he asked, “Like how?”
Gabriel sighed, “You’ll have to call me Master out there, keep your head down.
I can teach you. You can call me asshole in here if it makes you feel better.”
Sam gave a quiet laugh and faint smile. He quietly said, “Okay, I can do that.”
Gabriel smiled and happily asked, “So what is your name and how old are you?”
Sam looked up at Gabe and said, “Sam and I am 14.” He paused, “I understand if
you have to rename me or whatever. I get that, you may have to do that to keep
up appearances. But… ah… if you could just call me Sam in here that would be
great.”
Gabriel nodded and said, “I think I like Sam. It is nice and innocent. You have
much more freedom with a name than I do.” Gabriel heard his apartment door open
and close. He knew the female slave had left clothes for Sam.
Gabriel got up and retrieved the clothes. He came back and sat them on the
counter in the bathroom. He was tentative, “I don’t want to sound like the
guards but we are going to need to get you out of those clothes. I need to see
where you’re bleeding and if anything is broken. You are also covered in dirt.”
Quietly Sam said, “I know. Is it okay, if I leave my boxers on? Please.”
Gabriel smiled and said confidently, “Of course.”
With shaky hands Sam tried to start to undo the buttons on his shirt. His hands
were slick with blood and sweat. Sam turned his head away from Gabriel so he
didn’t have to watch his face as he struggled. Gabriel reached out his hands
and tentatively started helping Sam undo the buttons. About halfway through,
Sam dropped his hands to the side and let Gabriel do all of the work.
Once the shirt was unbuttoned Gabriel leaned Sam up against his shoulder as he
peeled the shirt off. Then Gabriel helped Sam work his undershirt off over his
head. Sam moaned in pain when he had to lift his arms. Gabriel grimaced but
didn’t say anything. He leaned Sam’s head on his shoulder so he could take a
look at Sam’s back. He gently took the wash cloth and started wiping away the
blood. As he cleaned it became pretty clear Sam was going to need stitches.
He was uneasy about calling one of the doctors on staff. Sam had not stripped
as ordered and they hadn’t cut Sam’s hair off. Gabriel knew the doctor could
balk at that, despite his status. So he did the next best thing. He called
Castiel.
Castiel was over a few moments later standing in the doorway to the bathroom
taking in the site of the bleeding boy. Bluntly Castiel said, “I do not
understand what you wish me to do.”
Gabriel rolled his eyes and said with irritation, “You’re going to college to
be a doctor. I want you to stitch him up and tell me if anything is broken.”
Castiel huffed, “Why Gabriel?”
Gabriel frowned at his twin, “Cas, I like the kid. He stood up to the guards.
He has spunk. I like that and I know we both promised to break the family mold
and not find someone who is a slave. But this kid might be the one for me. I
have to give him a chance.”
Castiel nodded and said, “I am a freshman, Gabe. I haven’t exactly stitched
anyone up.”
Gabriel smiled, “Well, there is a first time for everything.”
Castiel rolled his eyes and opened up the first aid kit. He sat down on the
edge of the bathtub. Cas nervously threaded the needle. Then he started sewing.
Sam didn’t do much while Cas was stitching him up. He moaned and whimpered
softly but he didn’t struggle. By the end, Cas was hopeful that he did it
correctly but he knew it was going to scar. Sam had three long lash marks, with
an unknown amount of stitches across his back.
Cas taped a bandage around the wound. Then he started to feel along the boy’s
ribs. He could see bruising and swelling. Sam grabbed onto Gabriel as Cas
prodded. After a couple moments, Cas removed his hands. He was nervous, “I
don’t know for sure if anything is broken because I am not a doctor. But it
feels very tender. Ice packs, maybe?”
Gabriel nodded and gently leaned Sam back in the tub. Castiel caught Sam by the
shoulder so his back wouldn’t rest on his wounds. Gabriel removed Sam’s shoes
and socks. Then he looked at Sam in the eyes. He could see that Sam was trying
not to blackout again. He unbuttoned Sam’s pants. Then he pulled the zipper
down.
Sam tensed as Gabriel worked off his pants. He hoped that Gabe wouldn’t touch
him in his private parts. He was relieved when he didn’t. Castiel looked at the
bruises covering Sam’s legs as Gabriel carefully washed down Sam’s legs
removing any dirt of blood.
When Gabe determined Sam to be adequately clean. They helped Sam out of the tub
and sat him on the toilet. Gabe grabbed the plain greyish blue shirt worn by
slaves. He slipped it over Sam’s head. Then he put a pair of boxers in the same
color on Sam’s lap. He asked tentatively, “Do you want my brother and I to
leave while you change into those?”
Sam shook his head yes but didn’t speak. Gabriel and Castiel left the room but
Gabe left the door ajar. Sam carefully worked his hips to get his boxers off
and changed into the new ones. He tossed down his boxers on the floor with his
other clothes as the last reminder of his old life. Sam reached down and picked
up his jeans.
His jeans were bloody but he pulled out his wallet. Sam opened it and he pulled
out the only family photo he had. It was a couple years old, but it had him,
Dean and his father. Sam ran his fingertips over the photo as he bit down on
his bottom lip. It hadn’t been a day and he already missed them.
Gabriel opened the door to see Sam looking at the photo. Sam pulled the picture
into his chest and the kid looked scared. Sam was frightened when he asked,
“Can I keep it, please? It is the only thing I have left.”
Gabe knelt down in front of Sam. He reached out and brushed Sam’s hair out of
his eyes. He liked the kid’s hair long but he wanted it a little bit longer.
Quietly Gabriel said, “Of course, I will even get you a small picture frame if
you want.” Sam nodded and chewed on his lip as he held the picture close.
Gabriel took his hand and gently lifted up Sam’s chin to make eye contact. He
tried to reassure Sam, “Hey kid, it’s going to be okay.”
Gabriel helped Sam get into the greyish blue pants worn by slaves. Then Gabe
carried Sam to his bed. Castiel pulled the covers back and Gabe laid Sam down
so that he was laying on his side. Sam was still clutching the photo. Gabe
pulled the covers up over Sam. He tentatively said, “You should get some rest.
I will bring you some food and water later. You can put your picture on the
nightstand so it doesn’t get bent. I promise it will be there when you wake
up.”
Sam nodded but didn’t release the picture. Gabriel and Cas left the bedroom and
Gabe shut off the light as he went. 
***** Chapter 3 *****
It was dark outside when Gabriel woke Sam. Sam did put the photo on the
nightstand and Gabe made a mental note to get a small frame for it. He didn’t
want to see the photo damaged and he knew small things like that could help to
gain Sam’s trust. Gabriel helped Sam sit up on the bed. Then he handed Sam a
warm bowl of soup. Sam ate it tentatively and slowly. Gabe knew the kid was
weary of him and he couldn’t really blame the kid. He was just glad Sam didn’t
have to witness Michael and Lucifer torturing and killing more than half the
slaves tonight when they got carried away with their fun.
Once the bowl was empty Gabriel sat it on the nightstand. Then he reached down
on the floor and pulled up a box. He held it in his lap for a moment. He was
nervous when he spoke, “While you were asleep, I measured your neck. In order
to keep my brothers and the guards hands off of you for the most part, you’ll
need to be collared by me. It will signal that you belong to me and any
problems with you should be reported directly to me. Still you can’t leave this
apartment without me. But it will help you.”
Sam stared at the box in Gabriel’s hands. He swallowed hard. He was scared when
he spoke, “I don’t really have a choice do I?”
Gabriel shrugged, “You do have a choice. You’ll always have a choice with me.”
Sam nodded and watched as Gabriel took the collar out of the box. It was golden
in color and Sam thought it matched Gabriel’s eyes. He wondered briefly if he
was drugged because he had the strong urge to wear the collar to show his
loyalty to Gabriel. Sam thought he must be getting sick or something. However
that did not stop him from nervously saying, “I want to wear it.”
Gabriel reached up and attached the collar to Sam’s neck. He used a small
wrench to lock the collar around Sam’s neck. A small tag hung down in front and
there was space to allow a leash to be attached. Gabriel knew he wouldn’t
mention that to Sam right now.
Sam reached up and felt the collar around his neck. In a way, it felt to Sam
like his freedom was being stripped away. First his clothes and now a metal
collar around his neck. He didn’t know what would come next. Sam felt the tag
and he looked up at Gabriel. He asked tentatively, “What does the tag say?”
Gabe patted Sam on the leg and said shyly, “Property of Gabriel Novak and it
has your name, Sam.” He paused, “If you choose to stay with me after you turn
21, you’ll be given a last name. It will be mine so you’ll be Sam Novak, but
right now you no longer have a last name. You’re just Sam.”
Sam was saddened that he was no longer Sam Winchester but he was grateful that
he got to keep his first name. He realized as he rested earlier that he didn’t
want to piss to Gabriel off. Gabriel was the only thing standing between him
and getting beat to death. Quietly Sam said, “Thank you, Ma..Master.”
Gabriel smiled and patted Sam’s leg again, “You don’t have to call me Master
inside of my apartment, Sam. I do appreciate the gesture but I want you to be
yourself.”
Sam nodded then he reached out and hugged Gabriel. Gabe returned the hug but he
was mindful of Sam’s stitches. He liked Sam being a little submissive towards
him but he hoped that Sam had a little more spirit in him once he healed. Only
time would tell, but Gabe was hopeful Sam was the one for him. He was concerned
though, because Sam hadn’t voiced whether or not he was interested in guys. Sam
had only voiced a concern about getting raped. Gabe knew he had a couple of
years to warm Sam up to the idea of having sex with him.
As Sam hugged Gabriel he heard shouting and screaming outside. He didn’t really
understand why he did it but he pulled Gabriel in closer to him. Sam quietly
asked him, “What is going on out there?”
Gabe pulled back and sighed, “Lucifer and Michael are torturing and killing
some of the new slaves. I disagree with it, but there isn’t much I can do. I’m
sorry.”
Sam stared at the window. He couldn’t see what was happening outside because of
the heavy drapes. He tentatively asked, “What are they doing to them?”
Gabe sighed again. He brushed Sam’s hair behind his ears. He tried to sound
reassuring, “Nothing that is going to happen to you. Please don’t concern
yourself with it.” He tried to change the subject, “Would you like some candy?”
Sam blinked at Gabe a couple times before shaking his head no. He was caught
off guard by the question. He nervously said, “Um no, I don’t really care for
candy that much.”
Gabe frowned and replied, “We will have to get you cultured. Candy is a very
important part of life.” Sam recoiled a little bit as fear crept up on him. He
was worried that he said the wrong thing to Gabriel. Gabe caught the queue from
Sam and quickly said, “We have seven years for you to learn all about candy. I
think I would like you to learn how to make it.”
Sam swallowed hard but his eyes had returned to the window. He chewed on his
bottom lip for a moment and started to fiddle with his hands. He was still
nervous when he spoke, “I am not a great cook. My dad is a hunter so we move
around a lot. It didn’t lend itself to cooking but I can learn. I might need
some help learning though.” Sam ducked his head as he finished speaking out of
uncertainty and fear.
Gabe chuckled and grinned, “Kid, you have plenty of time to learn and you have
nothing to be afraid of.” He looked over at Sam’s family photo on the
nightstand. He was expecting to see the kid’s mother in the photo but she was
absent. He tentatively asked, “Why isn’t your mom in the picture?”
Sam glanced over at the picture then briefly made eye contact with Gabe. He
lowered his head back down before he started speaking, “Oh, I don’t have a
mother. My mom tried to trade me to demons in a demon deal. The deal was made
before I was born. My dad protected me from that.” Sam gave a small smile at
the thought of his dad. He knew he had to hold on to what was good about his
father and his brother and let go of anything they had done to upset him.
Gabe smiled and replied, “My mother was a slave. She was just a teenager when
she had Castiel and I. She didn’t live to choose to be free or stay. I don’t
know how she died for sure but the rumor is Lucifer killed her. Sadly, I can
believe my brother would do that.”
Sam frowned and said, “I’m sorry about your mom.”
Gabe shrugged, “I ended up okay, I guess.” He paused, “I don’t think you’ll
going to be able to rest with that noise going on outside. What do you say we
watch a movie? I can eat your share of the candy, if you don’t want it.”
 
++
Dean and John silently emptied out Sam’s duffel bag onto the bed. Sam’s entire
life amounted to one bag. It saddened Dean because most of this bag didn’t even
represent Sam. His bag was mostly clothing. It wasn’t even clothes he picked
out. Sam’s clothes were once Dean’s. Dean wished that there was more pieces of
who Sam was in the bag. Just a few more memories of his brother he could hold
onto.
Inside the bag, they did find things they didn’t know about Sam. They found
papers on what courses to take to prepare for college. Sam wanted to be a
lawyer and Dean had no idea. He didn’t know that Sam had a study book for the
standardized tests to get into college. Sam had a map of the area where they
were staying which stated the best running trails. Dean thought Sam hated
training, but apparently he liked to run.
Towards the bottom of the bag, stashed away in the corner. Dean found a small
box. Inside that box there were little postcards from places they had been,
even the smallest town. Dean sat down with the box. He turned over the first
postcard, which he knew Sam must have stolen. On the back of the card, it had
what he liked about the place and what he will miss about the place. The cards
brought tears to Dean’s eyes.
He leafed through the cards with his father but he couldn’t bring himself to
read Sam’s words right now. The loss of his brother was too fresh and new. Dean
knew these postcards would keep him close to his brother forever. He decided
that he could always revisit the places Sam had thought to steal a postcard. He
could share the memory Sam created in the place with his brother, one last
time.
Dean carefully closed the box and he saw that his father had a locket of Sam’s
hair from the last time he had a trim. It was only about in an inch long. John
pulled out his lighter and looked at Dean. John bowed his head and he said
sorrowfully, “Sammy is at peace now.” John lit Sam’s hair on fire.
Dean and John watched the hair burn. It was symbolism for them of Sam’s
passing. It was the funeral they would never get to have for Sam and it was the
good byes they never got to share. After the hair burned. Dean wiped away his
tears. He stuffed Sam’s box of postcards in his own duffel bag and John took
Sam’s weapons.  
***** Chapter 4 *****
It had been a couple of weeks since Sam had been with Gabriel. He hadn’t gone
outside or even dared to open the curtains to see the sky. He was a little
cooped up but he knew there wasn’t anything he could do about it.  Sam was
still trying to figure out the method of cleaning that satisfied Gabriel. He
knew Gabriel was something of a slob that threw candy wrappers all over the
small apartment. It wasn’t pleasant having to pick those up with the stitches
on his back.
Sam had taken to making Gabriel simple breakfasts. He couldn’t cook anything
complex, even waffles were currently above his skill set. However, Sam could do
the easy stuff. He made Gabriel a simple breakfast of bacon, eggs, and toast.
He had been working on his timing so that whenever Gabriel came out dressed
from his shower breakfast would be ready.
Today, Sam’s timing was a little off. Gabriel lingered in the bedroom for a
couple minutes before coming out. Gabe smiled at Sam and sat down. He happily
said, “Sam, thank you for breakfast.”
Sam nodded and quietly said, “You’re welcome.” Then he turned and made his own
plate. Sam sat down next to Gabriel at the table. He started to tentatively
eat. Sam was still nervous around Gabriel. He had never heard of Gabriel and
Castiel Novak until he came here. Sam never inquired about why that was.
Gabriel ate happily. As he finished Gabe said, “Sam, we are going to have some
guests today. You’ll need to call me Master, just call them Sir, keep your head
down and avoid eye contact.”
Sam looked at Gabriel and saw in his eyes that he was being sincere. He nodded
and said hesitantly, “Okay, I can do that. May I ask why you are having
guests?”
Gabriel smiled and wiped his face with his napkin. Then he gave his full
attention to Sam. “Of course, you can Sam.” He paused and cleared his throat.
“I noticed that you favor chewing on one side of your mouth and you wince
whenever anything gets on the other side. I am going to have a dentist stop by
that does house calls and take a look. Would you mind telling me about that?”
Sam shook his head and put down his fork. He nervously said, “It’s nothing.” He
glanced up at Gabriel who clearly wasn’t believing him. Sam touched the tender
side of his face and said, “Um.. When the guards were hitting me they broke one
of my teeth. It is a molar in back.”
Gabriel sighed and said with some irritation, “That has to hurt like hell. Why
didn’t you tell me?”
Sam looked away and whispered, “I’m sorry. I just didn’t want to be a burden.”
Gabriel reached out a hand and lifted up Sam’s head to make Sam look at him. He
quietly said, “You’re not a burden. But things like this, where you are walking
around in pain for weeks is not okay. You need to tell me when you’re hurting.”
Sam nodded and apologized again, “I’m sorry. I won’t do it again.” He ran his
hand up and down his arm. Then he asked, “What is the dentist like? I’ve never
been to one.”
Gabriel raised an eyebrow at that. Then he shook his head. He tried to be
reassuring, “Well, it’s not that bad. I can have him drug you so you don’t care
if you get to nervous. With a broken tooth, he probably is going to drill in
your mouth today. I told them to clean your teeth too, which seems to have been
a good choice since you’ve never been. They may ask you what flavor of cleaning
crap to put in your mouth. Always choose the minty flavors, trust me. All the
flavors are terrible, but the minty ones are the least terrible.”
Sam nodded again and said quietly, “Thank you.”
Gabriel shrugged, “The dentist is this morning in about an hour. This
afternoon, you will be meeting your tutor. I pulled your school records when I
was out the other day. You weren’t kidding when you said you moved around a
lot. But your grades impressed me and I also saw on your records that you were
working on college prep. I don’t want you to give up on your dreams because of
this.” Gabriel motioned to the room around them. Then he added, “You’ll still
graduate high school and then you’ll go to college like any other kid. The only
difference is your education will all be done at home with a tutor.”
Sam fiddled with his hands for a few moments. He blushed a little bit then he
asked, “Why are you doing that for me?”
Gabriel smiled and put his silverware on his plate. He frankly said, “Because,
it is who you are Sam. You seemed to like school and there is no reason why you
can’t continue to learn. Besides, if you choose to stay with me. I want you to
be educated so we can have intelligent discussions. If you choose to leave, you
won’t be behind on achieving your goals. It works out either way.”
++
Sam was standing in the corner watching silently as the dentist and his
assistant setup. He was terrified. He remembered the things Dean had told him
about the dentist. About how they would pull out all of someone’s teeth, about
how it would hurt, and Sam did not want that to happen. He knew he should trust
Gabriel. Gabriel had been very kind to him but still he was a Novak and the
Novaks are not exactly known for their mercy.
It didn’t take long for the dentist to call, “Slave come over here and lay
down.”
Sam tentatively walked over to the dentist chair and sat down. He took a couple
deep breaths and cast his eyes away from the dentist. He heard the dentist talk
to Gabriel. His voice was cold, “Should I strap the slave down?”
Gabriel sounded annoyed, “No, he’s never been to the dentist before so how
about you try not to traumatize him. I named him Sam. You can call him that.”
The dentist grumbled and then he sharply said to Sam, “Open your mouth.”
Sam opened his mouth and he closed his eyes as the dentist started probing
around. He had some sort of metal stick in Sam’s mouth. Sam had no idea what
the name of the devise was. All he knew is when the dentist poked on his sore
tooth, he jolted in pain and gripped the sides of the chair hard. Sam settled
himself after the jolt but the dentist kept poking at the tooth. He couldn’t
stop the involuntary tears that started falling from his eyes.
Then Sam felt a hand on his. Gabriel’s voice was sharp, “Stop. You’re hurting
him.” Sam realized it was Gabriel’s hand on his and his knuckles were probably
white.
The dentist scuffed at Gabriel as he removed the tool. “It is just a slave,
Gabriel.”
Gabriel rolled his eyes at the dentist and replied, “Humm, maybe I should pull
some strings and get your son’s name drawn. I am sure my older brothers would
enjoy him.” The dentist got a horrified look on his face. Gabriel smirked at
that and said calmly, “Anyone’s kid can become a slave and it would be wise to
remember that. Now, do you know what is wrong with Sam’s tooth?”
The dentist nodded and said, “He broke it. I should be able to drill it out and
fill it. I am going to do that before I clean the rest of them.”
Gabriel nodded in agreement then he said, “Very well, but make sure you numb
the area. I don’t want Sam in any pain.”
Sam opened his eyes and he had a view of Gabe’s hand over his. He felt the
dentist stick a needle into his gums and he whined. Then after a few moments
the area felt cold and he couldn’t feel it anymore. It was a weird sensation
for Sam and not one that he expected. He knew he didn’t like it.
However, when the dentist took the drill to his mouth. Sam squeezed his eyes
shut and he felt himself gripping onto Gabriel’s hand. He let himself believe,
as the drill buzzed in his mouth and he felt the flakes of his own tooth on his
tongue, that it was Dean holding his hand. He just focused on Dean’s face and
what Dean would say, “It’s okay, Sammy. I got you. Big brother isn’t going to
let anything happen to you.”
Sam wasn’t sure how long the drilling lasted. He spaced out into his own little
world. It wasn’t until he heard the dentist say, “Tap your teeth, slave.” That
Sam knew it must be getting close to the end. He tapped his teeth as commanded.
Then the dentist said, “Grind your teeth back and forth, slave.” Sam did as he
was told. Much to his dismay the dentist drilled some more after that. He had
to repeat the grinding and the tapping a couple more times. Then his tooth was
declared fixed.
The next thing Sam knew the dentist’s assistant was applying some sort of
granular substance to each of his teeth. Whatever he was using to put the
material on with it rotated in his mouth and felt weird. This didn’t seem to
take as long before he was rinsing Sam’s mouth out with water. He was left with
a terrible minty flavor in his mouth. Then the man flossed Sam’s teeth which
was a bizarre experience for Sam. He still vaguely remembered sitting on the
bathroom counter when he was a kid with his mouth open for Dean or his dad to
floss his back teeth. He had trouble doing it on his own for the longest time.
Sam held that childhood memory close as the assistant was finishing the work.
Sam was relieved when he was finally able to get up out of the chair. He ran
his tongue over his teeth and he could feel that they were all still there. His
teeth also felt smoother than he ever remembered them being. It was a nice
feeling, Sam thought. He watched from the corner of the room as the dentist
packed up. Before they left, the dentist handed Gabriel a postcard.
Gabriel waved them out of his apartment and closed the door. Then he walked
over to Sam and held out the postcard. He sounded proud, “This is for you. You
did an amazing job today.”
Sam took the postcard from Gabriel’s hand. It had aftercare instructions on it
for his filling on the front and it was blank on the back. Sam realized in that
moment that his postcard collection was changing into new things he experienced
rather than places he’s been.  Sam clutched the card close and said, “Thank
you, Gabriel.”
Gabriel shrugged and said playfully, “Please don’t thank me for dental work.
Thank me when I do something fun, not something that borders on torture.
Anyways, you should lay down and rest for a bit. The side of your face may
start to hurt as the Novocain wears off. If you need painkillers let me know.”
Sam retreated to the bedroom and laid down. He slipped the postcard into the
empty drawer on the nightstand. He figured he could the write his tidbits about
the day after he met his tutor. He glanced at the framed picture of his family
before he laid his head down to rest.
++
Gabriel gently woke Sam a couple hours later. He quietly said, “Sam, the tutor
is here.” Gabriel was happy that Sam didn’t object the sharing a bed with him.
He was careful not to touch Sam while they slept which he thought helped. He
did notice at first Sam curled himself into a little ball while he slept. Now,
Gabriel noticed Sam seemed to be relaxing some while he slept. Gabriel took
that as a good sign.
Sam stretched and blinked a couple times at Gabriel. He could see that he
bedroom door was closed. He was grateful for that. He rubbed the side of his
face, which tingled under his touch now. Sam quietly got up and made the bed.
He let Gabriel primp his hair. He had noticed that Gabriel liked to touch his
hair. It didn’t really bother him. He was used to Dean messing with it all the
time.
Sam followed Gabriel out into living room. He kept his head down and could only
see his new tutor’s shoes He tutor sounded cheerful, “Well, this must be Sam.
Why don’t we take a seat in the dining room and go over your educational level
and what we hope to accomplish?”
Sam didn’t look up. He quietly replied, “Yes Sir.” And started walking into the
dining room. He knew he had not been told where to sit yet so he was waiting.
Sam didn’t know how this whole slave thing worked exactly. But from the limited
times he’s been around others, he found it was always better to wait for
painfully clear instructions.
Gabriel saw that Sam was waiting on him to say something. He spoke firmly, “Sam
please sit where you eat your food.”
Sam nodded and said quietly, “Yes Master.” Then he took his regular seat.
The tutor sat next to him and opened up a folder. He was cheerful, “It’s not
often I am asked to tutor a slave. Your master must really see something in you
and by looking at your school records you were a smart kid. Now, you’re a smart
slave.” The tutor laughed at his own joke, but Sam did not reply or smile. It
wasn’t funny to him.
The tutor cleared his throat and said, “Now, the school you were attending
before this finished your grades out for ninth grade. You got straight As. It
is technically summer but your master wants you to start on tenth grade now.
Since we won’t be taking breaks for summer, you may finish your high school
courses early. I don’t know what major of study your master has selected for
college.”
Gabriel caught the tutor looking at him and Gabriel shrugged. He said bluntly,
“You’re not the college tutor so what do you care?” Gabriel sat down at the
other end of the table to watch the exchange.
The tutor handed Sam a stack of textbooks and workbooks. He went over what
material needs to be covered and by when. The tutor advised he will be in
Gabriel’s apartment for two hours every weekday to help Sam. Gabe was happy to
see a small smile on Sam’s face. He hoped this would help the boredom that
comes with being locked up. He also hoped it would give Sam someone else to
talk to.
++
After Sam put his textbooks away on the bottom bookshelf in the living room
like Gabriel advised. Sam found himself in the bedroom. He was trying to figure
out what to write about. He knew he had a two sentence rule with his postcard
tradition but so much happened today. He knew he was going to break it. After
careful thought, Sam wrote:
“Today, I got my teeth cleaned and fixed for the first time. It wasn’t painful
after the dentist numbed me. I also found out I finished my freshman year with
straight As!
I miss being able to go to school and I miss my brother, Dean. He’d be
graduating high school sometime around now. I’m proud of him.”
Gabriel walked in the room as Sam finished writing. He watched Sam tuck the
postcard away in the drawer. He was itching to see what it said, but he
resisted the urge. He tentatively asked, “What are you up to Sam?”
Sam gave a small smile and said quietly, “Thank you for everything. My mouth
feels better and I am looking forward to learning more.”
Gabriel gave Sam a curious look and asked tentatively, “Do you journal or
anything? I can get you a journal.”
Sam shook his head no. He ran his fingers over the fabric of his pants. He was
uneasy when he spoke, “No, not really I used to collect postcards whenever I
went someplace interesting.” He shrugged, “It was just my way of remembering
the happy times.”
Gabriel gave Sam a small smile and said, “I hope you have some happy times
here.”
***** Chapter 5 *****
Dean opted out of going to his high school graduation. He just couldn’t bring
himself to care enough to celebrate something like that. He knew Sam would want
him too. He knew Sam would probably save up pennies to buy him a cake and give
him a handmade card. But Sam wasn’t here. Sam was dead.
Instead of going to graduation, Dean was staring at Sam’s book for the entrance
exams for college. He had never taken the test because he never intended on
going to college. His test was scheduled for the next morning and he was more
than a little nervous about it.
Dean was trying to cram for the vocabulary section, when he realized that some
of the big words Sam used to use that annoyed him came directly from this book.
It made Dean chuckle. He laughed when he found the word patronize on the list.
He could hear Sam’s voice in his head, “Stop patronizing me, Dean. It’s not
funny.”
Dean heard their motel room door open and his father walked in. John looked
tired and he was carrying a pie. He sat it down on the table and smiled at
Dean. “I know you didn’t want to go to graduation tonight, but I thought we
should celebrate anyways.”
John took the pie out of the box and waited for Dean to walk over. Dean sat
down in one of the chairs and stared at the apple pie in front of him. He
quietly said, “Thank you, Dad.”
John silently cut a piece of pie for Dean. He put it on a plate and handed it
to Dean. He cut one for himself then he sat down. Dean moaned with how good the
pie was when he bit in. He smiled and grinned at his dad. “This pie is amazing.
Where did you find it?”
John grinned at Dean and said, “The owner’s wife of the shop I work at makes
homemade pies and cookies. I asked her to make you a pie since I knew it was
your favorite.”
Dean licked his fork with more effort than necessary and said happily, “This is
amazing. This is by far the best connection you’ve ever made.” Dean hummed as
he finished the rest of his pie and John watched him while he enjoyed his own
piece. 
John shook his head and said after a long silence, “No, she’s not. I spoke with
the university here in town and they agreed to accept you regardless of what
you score on your test tomorrow. It seems Gabriel Novak put in a letter of
unconditional acceptance for you at all the nearby colleges, universities, and
trade schools.”
Dean scrunched up his brow and pushed his empty plate away. He thought for a
moment as he tried to figure out who Gabriel Novak was. Coming up with nothing,
Dean asked, “Who is Gabriel Novak?”
John sighed and said bluntly, “You need to keep up on the names of the ruling
princes. Gabriel Novak is the younger brother of Michael and Lucifer. He stays
out of the limelight. He and his twin brother are in line for the crown after
Lucifer.”
Dean grumbled and asked, “Does he do that for everyone whose sibling they have
sentenced to death?”
John raised an eyebrow and said firmly, “No, they said Gabriel has never done
that before and you are the only one he did it for.”
Dean shook his head and was dumbfounded, “Why would he care?”
John shrugged and said, “I don’t know, son. But it is a blessing. You should
get some sleep for your big test tomorrow.”
Dean rolled his eyes and picked up the plates to throw them in the trash. He
grinned as he tossed the plates away. He playfully said, “I think Sammy would
say to your comment, ‘I’m not five.’”
John gave an honest laugh and then he retorted, “Perhaps, but he would still
get his ass to bed.”
++
Dean found the test to be boring and stressful. The room was cold and stuffy.
It smelled like pencils which Dean thought made sense but it still didn’t make
him feel better. It was four hours of his life that he knew he would never get
back. He hoped he did well on the test. He didn’t want to rely on a Novak for
handouts.
He decided to go to the university in town because his dad already had a job
here. That meant Dean would be going to Northern Novak University. Dean
wandered down to the university campus and got a catalog. He knew he had to
figure out what exactly he wanted to study. It wasn’t something he had given
much thought too.
Dean opened the book to the first page. He skimmed the section about the
greatness of the Novak family and how important education is. He wanted to go
egg their palace or shot something. He figured shooting something would be more
acceptable and less likely to get him killed. Dean figured Sam would be pissed
if he joined him in Heaven so soon. Therefore he decided to stay on task with
figuring this out.
Finally Dean found the section on degrees offered and he felt like he was
reading a foreign language. Part of him wanted to sort through and find the
easiest degree and call it a day. The other part of him wanted to find an area
he actually loved and learn that. The problem was he didn’t know what area he
loved.
After careful sorting and a few painkillers later, Dean had it narrowed down to
general studies because it sounded easy and mechanical engineering because he
liked mechanics. He figured it could help both on a hunt and in the practical
application. He wasn’t sure which one to go with.
Dean sighed and put his research aside and grabbed a beer. He didn’t care that
he was underage to drink. He knew his father wouldn’t turn him in. Dean was
nursing his beer when his dad got home from working at the shop. Dean eyed him
for a moment, but John didn’t say anything.
John grabbed his own beer and sat down across from Dean. He was tentative when
he spoke, “I talked to Bobby who owns the shop. He agreed to hire me on full
time. I should be able to get medical benefits for us in three months.”
Dean took another drag of his beer and said carefully, “I’ve never been to a
real doctor in my life. Why is that important? You patch me up just fine.”
John rolled his eyes and said in a mellow tone, “It seems to be an important
thing to non-hunters. I am just trying to blend in. Give me a break… How did
your test go today?”
Dean shrugged and said, “Fine, I narrowed down what I want to go college for. I
wish Sammy was here to give his input. He would probably be impressed that I am
doing this. I am torn between the easy route and what I actually think I might
like.”
John was quiet for a moment. He knew college was never on Dean’s career path.
He could tell that the day he enrolled Dean in kindergarten. Still he knew he
had to help his son achieve this. Not for Sam as much as to prove to Dean that
he could do it. Dean had always put Sam first in his life and John thought that
maybe this would give Dean a chance to put himself first, even if he was doing
it in Sam’s memory.
Finally John replied, “I think you should do what you want to do, even if it is
difficult. You’re smarter than you give yourself credit for.”
Dean nodded and grimaced, “But that means I will have to take 5 math classes.”
John laughed and put down his beer, “I am sure you can get a tutor or find a
pretty girl to help you.”
++
After Dean finished his beer, he pulled out Sammy’s box of postcards from his
duffel bag. He opened it up and ran his fingers over the top card. He leafed
through them as he looked at the photos. He wanted to find one where the
picture on the front matched the day he had.
Towards the bottom of the stack there was a postcard from where Sam spent the
last few weeks of eighth grade. It had a windmill on the front with a caption
that said, “May the wind power us.” Dean thought the caption was cheesy but he
knew how important wind generation was to their society.
Dean flipped over the card to read what Sam wrote. His little brother only
wrote two sentences and it was in cursive. That made Dean laugh because cursive
seemed to be pushed until the minute they entered high school. Then no matter
what school they went to the teachers wanted them to print. Dean then carefully
read Sam’s words savoring each one of them.
“I graduated eighth grade today but Dean and Dad couldn’t make it because of a
hunt. I’ll miss the Robinsons when I leave here because they didn’t make me
feel out of place for not having any family at graduation.”
Dean realized it was a bittersweet memory for Sam, one that was only a year
old. He accomplished something in his young life and Dean was too busy hunting
to notice. A stupid eighth grade graduation was the biggest thing Sam would
ever accomplish in school and he missed it. All because of a salt and burn that
could have waited a day. It made Dean want to cry, scream, or yell. He didn’t
really know what he wanted to do, but he knew he would never have a chance to
make it up to Sam. He would never get to tell him that he was sorry for being a
jerk.
It did make him feel worse though, because he knew if Sam was alive. Sam would
have dragged him to his high school graduation. Sam would have doted on him
like an annoying little brother would. Dean knew he would be too blind to see
how much Sam cared about him or how much Sam wanted him to do the same thing
for him. Now Dean knew he would never get the chance to make it up to Sam.
***** Chapter 6 *****
Gabriel came back to his apartment after running some errands to find Sam
sitting at the dining room table staring intently at one of his textbooks. He
thought it was cute the way Sam would chew on his pencil when he was trying to
concentrate. He was happy that Sam seemed to be a little less tense around him.
He wasn’t sure if it was the tutoring that helped or if it was getting his
tooth fixed that helped.
It had been a couple months since the dentist and Gabe knew that he would be
going back to college soon. He wanted to go blow off some steam but he didn’t
want to do it and leave Sam alone. He wasn’t entirely sure Michael and Lucifer
would actually leave Sam alone if he left town for a weekend. Since Gabriel
would rather not see Sam traumatized or hurt by his brothers he decided to take
Sam with him. Now, all he had to do was break that news to Sam.
He strolled over to the dining room and smiled at Sam as the kid glanced up at
him. Gabe tentatively said, “What are you working on?”
Sam put down his pencil and flattened the page in the text book he was looking
at. He had a headache from trying to sort this out, “Geometry. It is giving me
a headache. My tutor wants me to write sentences to prove a shape is a shape.”
Gabriel watched as Sam rubbed his temples then he noticed a straight line
bruise across Sam’s left hand. He grabbed Sam’s arm to get a better look it.
Sam tried to pull back his arm from Gabriel but he held firm. Gabe looked at it
closely for a few moments and it was a fresh bruise. He released Sam’s arm and
watched as Sam pulled his arm close to his chest and looked away.
Carefully Gabriel asked, “What happened to your hand?”
Sam didn’t say anything. He remained silent because he didn’t want to get into
more trouble. He knew he had already upset his tutor once today.
Gabriel firmly said, “Sam, answer me.”
Sam bit down on his lip then he reluctantly replied. “My tutor hit me when I
started to work a math problem wrong. It’s nothing.”
Gabriel sighed and sat down next to Sam. He reached out his hand and turned
Sam’s head so Sam had to look at him. He calmly said, “Sam, it’s not okay for
anyone to hit you. If that happens, I need for you to tell me so I can put a
stop to it. If anyone threatens you, I need to know that. I can’t keep you safe
if I don’t know what is going on.” He paused to give Sam a moment to process.
Then he said, “I don’t want to interrogate you, but I need to know what has
been going on. So please tell me. What did your tutor hit you with and if that
has happened before?”
Sam shook his head and lowered his eyes. He was fighting back tears when he
spoke, “Um, today was the first day he hit me. One of the guards that beat me
was with him. That guard likes to tease me so I think the tutor was just
showing off or something. He hit me with a ruler.”
Gabriel let out a slow breath and then he said carefully, “How does the guard
tease you?”
Sam shrugged and said quietly, “He talks about how he wants to have sex with me
in graphic detail and how you won’t want me anymore once I get passed around to
all the guards. He tries to find out about stuff we do together. I don’t answer
him. I just tell him that he has to ask my Master.”
Gabriel was quiet for a moment because he didn’t know what to think about one
of the guards threatening to rape Sam. He knew which one it was. It was one of
Lucifer’s favorites, Azazel, so he couldn’t just kill the man. Although he
really wanted to. Carefully he said, “Sam, he’s not going to lay a hand on you
and I promise no one is going to rape you.” He paused and tried to sound
reassuring, “I’ve never asked you about your sexual history because you’re just
a kid and it’s none of my business. But even if you’ve had sex or been molested
in the past, it won’t change the fact that I want you in my life and it won’t
change the deal we made when we met.”
Sam gave a sad smile and said, “Thank you. But.. ah.. I’ve never been molested
or anything like that. I’m a virgin. I’ve never done anything besides kissing.”
He ducked his head to hide his blushing.
Gabriel chuckled and asked playfully, “French kissing?”
Sam crunched up his brow and made a disgusted face, “Gross! No, I haven’t
French kissed anyone. My brother said that is how you get STDs.”
Gabriel started laughing and he was starting to have a fondness for Sam’s
brother. He did find it odd that Sam would never call his brother by name when
he would tell stories about Dean and he rarely talked about his father. He
thought there might be something there, but he didn’t want to push. It took
Gabe a few moments to calm his laughter. Then he said, “I think your brother
was in the business of making sure you stayed innocent as long as possible. You
only have to worry about kissing if you see cold sores on their mouth. Then
don’t do it but I am clean so you shouldn’t have to worry.”
Sam’s eyes got wide with that statement and he felt his heart beating in his
chest. He nervously said, “You..ah.. You want me to kiss you?”
Gabriel hastily restated, “No, no, not yet. You’re too young to doing stuff
like that.” He stopped when he saw a confused look on Sam’s face. He sighed,
“I’m sorry. I would love it if we could have a sexual relationship one day but
right now you’re too young to consent to anything. If we ever kiss or do
anything more, I want you to be old enough to understand what that means and
want to do it with me. I don’t want you to feel obligated to out of fear or
whatever.” He firmly stated, “I will never hurt you or anyone that is not my
way.”
Sam nodded and said tentatively, “Okay, I understand but I am pretty sure I
stopped being a kid the day I was taken from my school.”
Gabriel frowned and said, “I know but humor me with this. Now, I was going to
live here during the school year but since the guards are on my shit list. I am
going to move us to a smaller mansion near where I go to school. It will just
be us, a couple servants, and guards of my selection. It is near Southern Novak
University. It is a two and a half hour drive from here. Pack your things
including your textbooks and clothes.”
Gabe knew moving someplace else was a change of plans but he knew it was a
change of plans he would happily make. Even though it was spur of the moment,
Gabe thought it would be a good change. It would give him more time with Sam.
++
Sam gathered up his meager belongs. He found it reassuring that Gabriel asked
him before they left if he remembered his picture and postcard. He put his bag
in the trunk of the limo that was going to carry them to their new home. Sam
was trying not to be giddy because this was the first time he had been outside
or seen the sky in months.
He wondered if it would be okay to ask Gabe if he could open the curtains when
they get to the new mansion. He liked being able to see the sky and he thought
asking to go outside would definitely be pushing his luck. Sam knew Gabriel
said that he didn’t want to be feared but Sam was still afraid of him on some
level.
Gabriel had Sam enter the limo before him and Sam sat near the window on the
other side. They waited until two other slaves entered the back with them.
These were both female and they wore a simple bluish grey dress in the same
tone as Sam’s clothes. Their hair was about midway down their heads and down
their neck in some places. It was uneven and looked choppy. Sam knew they had
been there for at least year judging by their hair growth.
The two women didn’t speak or look at either Sam or Gabriel. Sam noticed that
their collars were different than his. They had what looked like a bulky iron
collar that was just bolted on. It made Sam nervous and he wondered what the
reason for the difference was. He moved closer to Gabriel as the limo started
to move.
He felt Gabriel put an arm around him and whisper in his ear, “What’s wrong,
Sam?”
Sam shrugged and leaned into the hug. He knew that it was probably foolish to
enjoy the platonic affection Gabriel offered, but his choices were limited.
Quietly Sam said, “Master, why are their collars different than mine?”
Gabriel looked at the two women on the other seat for a moment and he had to
admit, Sam was in a lot better shape than them. He carefully said, “They don’t
belong to me specifically. They are just general slaves of the Novak family. I
claimed you as mine, so there are some perks that go along with that. Anyone
could order them around to do anything, unlike you.” Gabe paused and frowned,
“I think I will be calling the hair stylist to fix their hair. I keep telling
my brothers that shaving their heads is a bad idea because it takes a long time
to get everything looking decent again.”
Sam wrapped an arm around Gabriel as he looked at them. He tentatively asked,
“Master, is that why you didn’t shave my head? I know you haven’t cut my hair
since I’ve been with you.”
Gabriel was surprised that Sam was holding onto him but he wasn’t about to
complain. He liked it because it felt like to him Sam was coming to him for
comfort and a sense of safety. Gabriel smelled Sam’s hair for a moment then he
said, “I like your hair and I like long hair on guys. Well, not super long but
I want your hair just above your shoulders. You do need a trim.”
Sam sighed and said quietly, “Okay Master, my dad would have a fit about that.
He always wanted me to get a military haircut.”
Gabriel hummed for a moment then he said, “No, I don’t think you’ll be getting
one of those.”
Sam didn’t say anything more to Gabriel about that. He just stared out the
window and watched the scenery on the drive. It was nice to be able to see the
outside world again even if it was from inside a limo. He did think it was
pretty cool to get to ride in a limo. He wished he could tell Dean about it but
he knew that wasn’t possible. Instead, he just enjoyed the scenery and the
feeling of having Gabriel close.
++
The mansion was smaller than the one they were staying at. Gabriel explained
that it was just them in this mansion so Sam could move around freely. He
explained that the two other slaves would help with the housekeeping and he
could help after his studies were done. Gabriel knew this house would take
longer to clean and he didn’t want Sam to put off his studies. He led Sam into
the master bedroom and closed the door. Sam held his bag firmly in his hand.
Gabriel smiled and said calmly, “I wanted to talk to you in private before we
got settled in. You can either stay in here with me or you can sleep in your
own room. I wanted to give you the choice.”
Sam fidgeted for a moment. He looked at the bed then he looked at Gabriel. He
was nervous and ashamed when he spoke, “Can I stay with you? I feel safer.”
Gabriel nodded and was saddened by Sam’s words. He wasn’t completely surprised
given the encounter with the guard. Gabriel knew that no horny guards would be
molesting Sam at night if Sam was in bed with him and he had a feeling Sam knew
that too. Gabriel put a smile on his face and said, “That sounds wonderful,
Sam. Why don’t you go ahead and unpack your stuff? I can show you where the
study is to put your textbooks when you’re done.”
He watched as Sam started to unpack his things. Gabriel smiled when he saw that
the first thing Sam pulled out was his family picture and set it up on the
nightstand. He watched Sam carefully put his postcard in the desk drawer and
put his clothes in the closet. Gabriel showed Sam where to put his textbooks in
the study and told Sam he would be getting a different much nicer tutor. Then
Gabriel handed Sam a postcard.
Sam took it and looked it carefully. It had a photo of the mansion he stayed at
for the last couple months with Gabriel. He looked on the back to see that it
was blank. He looked up at Gabriel and asked, “Why are you giving this to me?”
Gabriel smiled and said, “Because you told me you collected postcards to write
down your memories when you move. Today, you moved. I did order some generic
ones with on candy them so you can write down life events that are significant
to you. But I thought this would do for now. You don’t have to write anything
on it if you don’t want too. I know that some of your worst memories are
probably from that place.”
Sam looked at the postcard and smiled. He quietly said, “Maybe, but it also
held some of the best memories. Thank you, Gabriel.”
Sam wandered his way into their bedroom and sat down on his side of the bed. He
pulled out an ink pen and thought about what he wanted to write. Gabriel was
right about him being able to think of several terrible things that happened to
him while he was at that place but good things also happened. He knew he was
shown mercy when he asked for none. He was accepted when he didn’t want to be.
He was asked to be himself, even though he was too afraid to show that person.
 
In the end, Sam decided to write:
“I found out that I was worth something when I thought I was less than nothing.
I will miss the privacy Gabriel and I had there.”
Sam slipped the postcard into the drawer on nightstand with his other postcard.
He smiled because he knew his collection was starting again. He hoped that
someday; he could get his other postcards back. But he knew his dad probably
threw them away.
***** Chapter 7 *****
Dean was nervous about this whole college thing. He had gotten successfully
enrolled and he didn’t even need to fall back on his unconditional acceptance
letter from a Novak. His test scores were adequate, much to his relief. He did
find out that the reason he was given an unconditional acceptance letter was
because he was credited with killing a Wendigo at a national park earlier in
the year. Apparently, it was Gabriel Novak’s favorite park so he issued the
letters as a thank you.
Dean wasn’t sure how he felt about that. Considering, he wasn’t the one who
killed the Wendigo. Sam killed the Wendigo, but since Sam was 13 at the time.
He couldn’t be credited with it officially so Dean took the credit. As Dean
recalled, Sam didn’t care who got the credit and the reward money. His dorky
little brother just wanted a quiet camping trip complete with granola bars.
Dean didn’t get it and neither did Dad, but it was nice weather and cheaper
than a motel so they went along with it.
Now, Dean missed his little brother’s quirks and complete lack of fear of
death. Dean remembered John telling him that eventually Sam would grow a
healthy fear of death, but when someone is young they think they are
invincible. Dean knew the exact moment Sam gained a fear of death. He could see
it in Sam’s eyes and he could hear it in Sam’s voice as they drug him away. He
tried not to think about what Sam’s last moments were like. He just hoped it
was quick and Sam didn’t suffer much.
None the less, Dean was relieved that his college acceptance notation from a
Novak was because of hunting and not because that particular Novak was the one
to kill his brother. He did look up Gabriel Novak and he found out a whole lot
of nothing about him. He couldn’t even find a picture of Gabriel or his twin
brother, Castiel. The sources he read said they would remain mostly anonymous
until a time of their choosing. Traditionally, they made themselves known after
they took a slave as their own or when they finished college.   
But today, Dean had important work, sort of. He had to meet with his tutor for
his College Algebra course. He decided that he wasn’t even going to try to take
his math classes without a tutor. He knew that without Sam’s help he was
screwed. Sam may have been four years younger than him, but he was
mathematically inclined and Dean remembered exploiting that on a number of
occasions.
Dean made his way to the library where he was supposed to meet his tutor. All
he knew was that he was supposed to meet the tutor at the front desk. He didn’t
even have the guy’s full name just a last name, Milton. He made his way up to
the desk and was greeted by a perky blonde. The girl gave Dean the once over.
He smiled at her but didn’t flirt. His womanizing and extra circulars with the
gentlemen had diminished to almost nothing since Sam died. He just didn’t have
an interest.
Politely Dean said, “I am looking for a Milton for tutoring? I am not sure if
it is a he or she.”
The blonde perked up and said cheerfully, “Oh, Cas Milton just got here a few
minutes ago.” She pointed over to the far corner of the library where a dark
haired man was sitting with his face buried in a book. Dean snorted because the
sheer look of concentration on the guy’s face was humorous. The blonde said,
“He’s over there.” Then she leaned forward and whispered, “He’s a little
socially stunted but he’s really a nice guy once you get to know him.”
Dean smiled and said tentatively, “Good to know.”
He wandered over to the table where Cas Milton was sitting. Dean cleared his
throat and said with uncertainty, “Um, are you Milton the tutor?”
Castiel looked up and closed his book. He stood up and extended his hand for
Dean to shake. He formally said, “Yes, I am. My name is Cas Milton.”
Dean firmly shook Castiel’s hand then he said causally, “Nice to meet you. I’m
Dean Winchester.”
Castiel motioned for Dean to sit and Dean sat across from him. Dean thought
that Cas seemed a little odd but with an odd name he wasn’t too surprised.
There was silence between the two of them for several moments. Dean was trying
to figure Cas out and he figured Cas was attempting to do the same thing.
Finally, Cas spoke in an unemotional voice, “I suppose it is customary for me
to tell you about myself.” He paused as Dean stared at him wondering what he
got himself into. “I tested out of all the math classes up to Calculus III. I
tutor so I can get the full college experience.”
Dean raised an eyebrow at that and asked incredulously, “The full college
experience?”
Cas shrugged and replied, “My family is very wealthy and I wish to understand
the struggles of the average college student during my studies. I read that
often college students take low paying jobs with very little reward to
supplement their income.” It was difficult for Cas to put into words why he was
doing this. Somehow just saying that he wanted to be like everyone else just
didn’t fit and he didn’t want anyone to find out he was a Novak.
Dean gave a light laugh because as far as he could tell Cas was a little off.
He rubbed his hands over his face and sighed, “Okay, how about you help me pass
my algebra classes and I will help you see the reward in me passing?”
Cas nodded and said coolly, “That sounds fine, Dean. What makes you think you
need a tutor?”
Dean was silent for a moment because classes hadn’t even started yet. But here
he was meeting with a tutor and really he didn’t have a reason he wanted to
give. The truth was his math liaison and cheerleading section of a little
brother was dead, but he wasn’t about to dump that on some random guy who was
tutoring for the college experience.
Instead Dean said, “Algebra has always been a struggle for me and I want to
succeed.” He narrowed his eyes on Cas and said firmly, “I’m not here for the
college experience.”
Cas nodded slowly then quirked his head at Dean. His tone was curious when he
spoke, “You seem very odd, Dean Winchester. Do you live on campus?”
Dean shook his head no and looked down. He fidgeted for a moment then he calmly
replied, “No, my dad and I moved here a couple months ago. We signed a lease on
an apartment last month.”
Cas smiled at that which Dean thought was different. What was more different to
Dean was what Cas said next. “I never knew my father but that is a story for
another time. I am available most evenings. I saw that your College Algebra
course was in the afternoon, so I thought it might be better to meet in
sometime after the class.”
Dean smiled back at Cas and thought if the guy wasn’t so weird and clearly
asexual he might have an interest. But Dean reminded himself that loving and
leaving Cas could screw him with his studies. He cleared his throat and said,
“I work in the evenings at a bar. I’m off on Mondays and Tuesdays. Maybe we
could meet up then?” He paused and he realized he was going to sound like he
was 10 but it had to be said, “I can’t meet up both nights. My dad and I have
dinner together at least once a week… It’s family time.”
Cas nodded and said, “I wish I could relate to that, but I am glad you have
your father. My brothers and I do not see each other as often as I would like
and when we do I often wish I wasn’t there. Are you an only child?”
Dean glanced up at that. He blinked a couple times and he frowned. He was a
little sad when he replied, “I’m all my dad has left, if that is what you’re
asking. That is a touché subject for me that I would rather not get into it.”
Cas shrugged and glanced off into the corner of the library. He saw one of the
undercover guards lingering which annoyed him. He was curious about Dean’s past
but he decided not to pry or ask for a full report on Dean from his sources. He
wanted to keep their relationship professional or however it was college
students related. He wanted that, even if he didn’t know what that was.
Cas sounded unaffected by Dean’s sadness when he spoke, “If it makes you feel
better, you’re not missing out on much. My brothers have a way of making my
life difficult. I envy you in that respect.” He paused and Dean wasn’t sure if
Cas was just painfully socially awkward or if he should punch the guy for not
appreciating what he had. Dean didn’t think there was anything in him to envy.
He highly doubted Sam’s murder was something to envy.
Dean barely heard it when Cas continued speaking, “How does 6:30 on Mondays
sound? I am sure we can squeeze in other times if you need more help.”
Dean gave a fake smile and said, “That sounds great, Cas. I will see you on
Mondays.”
++
Dean stopped outside the door to the apartment he was sharing with his father.
It was rundown and not in the best neighborhood but it was the first real home
either of them had in years. It felt off to Dean to be setting up shop some
place for the long haul. But he knew it was worth it for Sam, for his dad, and
for himself.
He picked up a small box that was left outside the door and walked in the
apartment. John wasn’t home yet which was fine with Dean. He sat down the box
on their kitchen table that Dean found at a garage sale for five dollars. He
didn’t bother reading who the box was from or what might be in it. Instead,
Dean tore open the box.
He realized as soon as he opened the box that he should have just burned the
box and never opened it. Folded inside the box were the clothes Sam was wearing
the day he was taken. Dean knew the nation had an obligation to return the
personal effects of someone when they are taken as a slave, even if their ashes
aren’t returned for years later. He didn’t understand the concept of that, but
it wasn’t his choice.
Dean carefully pulled out Sam’s wallet first. He opened it to find that a few
dollars were still tucked inside. Dean frowned he saw that Sam didn’t have a
family photo in his wallet. He thought that was odd considering Sam begged for
months to get one for his wallet. But Dean knew Sam was a pain in the ass so it
wasn’t terribly surprising.
Dean pulled out Sam’s silver pocket knife and stared at it for a moment. He
smiled at the side to see SAM carved into the side. He remembered when Sam did
that. His brother 9 or 10 and he wanted to make his knife extra special. Dean
held it in his hand and thought about how Sam will never realize how special
that knife is to him.
Next Dean pulled out Sam’s over shirt and almost immediately regretted it. The
shirt was firm in his hands and it was discolored with dried blood. Sam’s
blood, Dean thought. The back of the shirt was ripped in three places and
around the tears there seemed to be a lot of dried blood or at least those
places on Sam’s back were the source of the blood. The front of the shirt had a
lot of blood too, Dean guessed it was from Sam’s nose or mouth.
Sam’s white undershirt was torn in the same places as his over shirt and was
almost completely covered in dried blood. Sam’s pants were torn at the knees
and Dean could see that there was less blood on his pants but there was still
blood. Dean was staring blankly at Sam’s pants when his father walked into the
apartment.
John was cheerful or at least pretending to be, “What’s in the box, Deano?”
Dean glanced up at his dad and turned around. He stammered out, “I.. I think
Sammy got beat to death.”
John went over to the box and looked through the items just as Dean had. His
heart felt like it was shattering inside his chest. He didn’t know if Sam got
beat to death or if whatever happened was just the first step in a series of
unspeakable tortures that happened to him that day. He did hope for Sam’s sake
that his life ended with the beating. John didn’t want his son to suffer any
more than he already had.
John gathered the items back up into the box and turned to Dean. He was trying
to keep it together for his eldest son, “I will burn these outside the shop
tomorrow. We don’t need Sammy’s spirit lingering. He deserves to be able to
move on.”
Dean watched John leave the apartment with the box. He was somewhat glad to see
it gone but in a way it stung just a little more because Dean knew that Sam was
really gone. Dean wandered back to his bedroom and closed the door.
It felt off to Dean to have his own room and his own bed. He hadn’t had his own
room since he was four and he hadn’t had his own bed since he was about six
when Sam stopped sleeping in a crib at the motels. Dean sat down on his bed,
one that he knew he would never had to share with Sam and took out Sam’s box of
postcards off the nightstand.
He didn’t really pay attention to which one he pulled. Right now, he just
wanted to hear Sam’s words. In Sam’s voice in his head. The card he pulled had
a giant ball of twine on it. Dean chuckled. He remembered dragging Sam to see
the world’s largest ball of twine. Sam was not impressed as Dean recalled but
the aggravation on Sam’s face throughout the experience was worth it.
Dean flipped over the card to read what Sam wrote: “I almost got to kiss a girl
for the first time, but Dean interrupted me to go see a ball of twine. I will
miss stargazing with Dean because the sky is so clear here.”
Dean frowned. He was somehow expecting more anger from Sam about messing up his
first kiss. Dean put the card back in the box and mused about how he would have
teased Sam about that if he had known. He made a mental note to go stargazing
with his dad sometime. Dean knew John didn’t know they did that to get away
from everything. He thought it would be nice to share in the memory with his
father.
 
***** Chapter 8 *****
Chapter Summary
     This chapter is painful in a literal sense for Sam.
Sam was not doing well with being exposed to other slaves and guards on a daily
basis. Before, he was able to avoid them for the most part because Gabriel kept
him locked away. He didn’t like being locked up in an apartment before but now
he longed for it.
The two other slaves got their hair cut into pixy cuts which judging by their
facial expressions they weren’t happy about. Sam just got his hair trimmed up a
little around his neck and Gabriel didn’t ask for his input on it. He wasn’t
sure he liked the idea of having longer hair but he knew better than to make a
big deal out of it. He did feel awkward having longer hair than the two female
slaves. Sam couldn’t say for sure but he thought he could feel their jealousy.
Sam thought they had good reason to be jealous. Gabriel named them Candy Apple
and Lollipop. He had no idea what their names actually were and he didn’t want
to chance getting beat by one of the guards for asking. He knew they didn’t
like their names and they thought it was unfair that he had a normal name. Sam
decided not to tell them that Sam was his real name. He figured that would only
add fuel to the fire.
They were generally standoffish with Sam which he tried to ignore. When he did
talk to them they were short and it was pretty clear they didn’t want him
around. He would usually end up in the kitchen as a result, attempting to learn
how to cook. Gabriel wanted him to learn how to cook, especially sweets, and he
was encouraging Sam to experiment. The thing was, Sam found cooking tedious and
he didn’t enjoy it.
The guards were dicks as far as Sam could tell. He figured out if he so much as
looked at them wrong when Gabriel wasn’t around he was going to get hit. Sam
did notice that they never hit him hard enough to leave a mark. He knew that
was because they feared Gabriel getting upset. Sam knew he should say something
to Gabriel but he was afraid it would make the situation worse.
The guards even have a nickname for Sam. They call him Spoiled Fuck. They never
call him that in front of Gabriel but anytime Gabriel was out of the house.
They never call him Sam. It is always Spoiled Fuck. As it was explained to him
when one of the guards had him pinned to the floor. Gabriel spoils him which as
far as Sam could tell was true. The guards also believed Sam to be having sex
with Gabriel, which while not true it caused him to get called Fuck.
Sam never corrected the guards on whether or not he was having sex with
Gabriel. He kept pretty tight lipped about what his relationship was like with
Gabriel behind closed doors. Gabriel hadn’t told him to keep his mouth shut
about it. Sam just didn’t want to try to defend his virginity or tell them that
Gabriel wasn’t touching him like that because Sam feared they would take it
from him. He was afraid they would touch him and rape him. He knew that if they
believed Gabriel to have laid claim to him sexually they would keep their hands
off his genitals. So far his theory was holding true.
Today was a bad day for Sam. He knew it was going to be a bad day because
Gabriel said he was going to be out all day. Sam met with his tutor and did his
homework in the morning. The guards left him alone when he was in the study.
However, after that Sam found himself in the kitchen making sandwiches for all
of the guards and other slaves for lunch. He could handle making sandwiches.
Sam was finishing up the last sandwich when the guard he hated the most walked
in, Zachariah.
Sam made sure to keep his face neutral but he was fairly certain Zachariah
could see his apprehension. He knew that was enough to set Zachariah off. He
kept his head down and continued working as Zachariah circled him. Then
Zachariah grabbed the back of his hair and pulled back. Sam closed his eyes
because the last thing he wanted to do was accidently look Zachariah in the
eyes. If Sam could describe Zachariah’s voice, it would be one of pure hate.
Sam cringed when Zachariah spoke, “Well, how is Spoiled Fuck doing today? Hmm?”
Sam knew that he wasn’t expected to answer that question so he just remained
silent. Zachariah continued, “I think Spoiled Fuck needs to know what it is
like to fuck a woman. Gabriel won’t even know and if he does find out… I wonder
if he will cut your dick off.”
Sam took a couple deep breaths and said as calmly as he could. “I’m sorry, Sir.
But my body belongs to Master and I cannot participate in that activity.”
Sam felt Zachariah start to move a hand up his shirt and he felt his heart
start to beat faster as Zachariah said, “We told Candy Apple to get on the
floor and spread her legs. She did. All the guards and myself already took a
round with her and now it is Spoiled Fuck’s turn.”
Zachariah pulled Sam into the living room by his hair. Sam stumbled into the
room to see Candy Apple laid out on the floor. Her face was blank and Sam was
pretty sure she zoned out what was happening to her. He couldn’t blame her. He
wished sometimes he could just zone out for the next seven years. Zachariah
pushed Sam down on the ground in front of her and demanded, “Fuck her or I take
out the riding crop.”
Sam stared off in the distance for a few moments. He knew fighting them would
be stupid and it could get the other two slaves killed in the process. So he
went with the only real option he had. “Please take out the riding crop, Sir. I
will not have sex with her.”
Sam felt the riding crop start to hit his back. He knew immediately that
Zachariah was hitting him as hard as he could. Sam tried to steady his
breathing and he just tried to focus on breathing in and out. After about 15
minutes, Sam had not said a word and he could feel Zachariah’s anger growing.
He shouted, “Candy Apple get your slutty ass out of here. You don’t want to get
caught in the blood splatter.”
Sam watched as he got a moment of reprieve as Candy Apple scurried out of the
room. Then he felt Zachariah’s hands on him tracing around his shoulders. He
felt Zachariah cut away his shirt and Sam fought the urge to curl his arms
around himself. Instead he just let his arms lay limply at his side. He knew
enough not to put up a fight. He knew they wouldn’t kill him, but they could
make him hurt.
Sam listened as Zachariah walked away and came back a moment later. He felt
something else start hitting his back. He could feel something sharp digging
into his skin and tearing off with every hit. He knew he was bleeding and part
of him was happy. Gabriel was going to know. The other part of him was
terrified because he didn’t know what Gabriel would do.
Sam wasn’t sure how long it took, but he could see blood dripping down off his
fingertips that had rolled down his arms from his back. He was fixated on the
growing puddle of blood as Zachariah hit him. He wondered how long it would
take him to bleed out and how nice that would be. Sam could hear screaming but
he wasn’t sure who was screaming. He knew it was probably him, but his own
voice just felt so distant to him at the moment.
He could hear Zachariah’s words rather clearly, “All you had to do was fuck
Candy Apple and you couldn’t do that. Are you that much of a faggot, Spoiled
Fuck? Or are you that loyal to Gabriel?”
Sam didn’t answer because he had nothing to say. He was considering telling
Zachariah to go to Hell when he heard a commanding voice. “What is going on?”
It was Gabriel’s voice. Sam felt a rush of relief wash over his throbbing body.
He heard Gabriel’s anger rise, “If I heard you correctly, you are beating Sam
bloody because he wouldn’t fuck Candy Apple?”
Gabriel was angry, extremely angry. He decided to skip out on his last class
today because he wasn’t feeling well and he came home to this. Sam was on his
knees in the living room. His hands were resting on the floor to help steady
himself and by some miracle or curse Sam hadn’t passed out. From what Gabriel
could see Sam’s entire back was raw and bleeding. There was a small pool of
blood around Sam and blood splatter throughout the room.
He was surprised Sam knelt there and took the beating like that. Gabriel knew
from reading about Sam’s hunting experience that Sam could have killed
Zachariah easily. He knew Sam could kill him easily enough but never did. Sam
never even raised a hand up or tried to defend himself. Looking back Gabriel
realized, even on that first day, Sam didn’t try to fight the guards but he
didn’t obey them either. There was only one reason Gabriel could think of on
why Sam would do that and that would be if Sam wanted to die.  
Zachariah stared at Gabriel in stunned silence for a moment. Then he said,
“Yes, the slave disobeyed me.”
Gabriel nodded and took a step towards Zachariah. He took a deep breath as he
kept his eyes on Sam. He could see Sam starting to wobble and he was fairly
certain Sam was going to pass out soon. Gabriel turned to one of the other
guards and said firmly, “Call the doctor and tell him he probably wants to
bring blood for Sam. If Sam dies, all of you and your children die.” He paused
and turned his focus to Zachariah. He coldly asked, “What makes you think you
have any right to order Sam around? I am pretty sure that collar around his
neck means he answers to me and his orders come from me. Are you telling me,
that you think you are above me?”
Zachariah stammered out, “I don’t. I was just trying to get him to obey.”
Gabriel glared at Zachariah as the doctor walked over to Sam and laid Sam on
the floor. Sam didn’t struggle. Sam felt something being pressed onto his back
and he felt a needle being pushed into his arm. Sam heard the doctor say, “Sam,
I need you to try to stay awake and stay with me.” Sam blinked weakly at the
doctor a couple times. He wondered if he just drifted off to sleep, if maybe he
wouldn’t wake up. Sam could feel the doctor give him shots in his back and then
the area went numb. He thought about telling the doctor that he could handle it
but he reframed himself.
Sam looked up to see Gabriel glaring at someone. He said weakly, “I’m sorry,
Master.” Then Sam’s world faded into darkness.
Gabriel looked down to see that Sam was unconscious and he was pissed. He took
a step towards Zachariah and asked, “Did you have sex with Candy Apple before
you decided to beat Sam for obeying my orders?”
Zachariah nodded and said, “Yes, I did. She was willing.”
Gabriel raised an eyebrow and said coldly, “Did anybody else fuck her?”
Zachariah swallowed hard and said, “We all did. It’s just stress relief.”
Gabriel nodded and held out his hand. He calmly said, “Give me your knife.”
Zachariah handed over his knife and Gabriel toyed with it in his hand for a
moment. Then he stepped forward and slit Zachariah’s throat. Gabriel watched as
Zachariah collapsed on the floor and bled out. He sighed and turned towards the
doctor that was still working on Sam. He firmly said to the doctor, “I want Sam
taken to my room where I can keep an eye on him. Once you are done treating
Sam, I want all of the guards castrated then please make sure Candy Apple
wasn’t damaged.”
++
Gabriel sat on the edge of his bed and looked at Sam, who was laying on his
belly. He had Sam moved up to their room after the doctor finished working. Sam
had taken two pints of blood and he still had an IV in his arm to pump him full
of drugs and fluids. Gabriel was worried about Sam and upset about what
happened. He didn’t feel it was right and he wished Sam would just talk to him
instead of fearing him.
While Gabriel was just going to have the guards castrated when Michael heard of
the incident, Michael ordered all of the guards killed for having sex with a
slave. Gabriel could currently hear the new guards getting familiar with the
home. He had decided that for Sam’s benefit, the guards were not allowed
upstairs. Gabriel knew this would give Sam the ability to go to the study and
their bedroom in peace when he wasn’t there. He had yet to tell Sam, but he was
no longer going to let Sam be around any of the guards without him present.
Gabriel watched as Sam slowly started to wake up. It hurt Gabriel when the
first thing Sam said was a weak, “I’m sorry, Master.”
Gabriel knelt down by the side of the bed so he could look into Sam’s eyes. He
rested a hand on Sam’s cheek and calmly said, “You have nothing to be sorry
for. I should be apologizing to you for leaving you alone with those monsters.”
Sam blinked a couple times and replied weakly, “Not monsters, they are human…
Can’t hurt humans.”
Quietly Gabriel asked, “Is that a hunting rule you had with your family?”
Sam weakly said, “Yes. Sometimes, it is a stupid rule.” Sam took a couple deep
breaths and asked, “I.. I can’t take this anymore. Please, kill me.” A couple
tears fell down Sam’s face and he repeated, “Please.”
Gabriel gently brushed Sam’s hair out of his face as he tried not to have a
breakdown himself. Gabe took a deep breath and his voice was laced with sadness
and grief, “No Sam, I won’t kill you. I killed Zachariah and Michael ordered
the rest of the guards killed. The new guards are no longer allowed upstairs
and you will no longer be going downstairs without me at home. I am having a
locked door installed to keep you away from them. I don’t want to isolate you
but I want to keep you safe.”
Quietly Sam said, “Thank you. No one liked me anyways. Even the other slaves
hate me. Do you hate me?”
Gabe couldn’t hold up his resolve anymore. He leaned his head on Sam’s arm as
he silently cried. Once he regained his composure he said softly, “No Sam, I
don’t hate you. I love you and I hope that someday, you can love me.”
Sam blinked at Gabe a couple times with blurry eyes, “I am trying.” He paused.
“I’ve never had pain meds like this before. I don’t like the way it feels.”
Gabe shook his head and said firmly, “I’m not taking you off the pain
medication unless you have a reaction to it. Your back looks like ground meat
and I will not force you to suffer through that.”
Sam took in Gabe’s words for a moment. Then asked weakly, “So you are going to
force me to be drugged?”
Gabe sighed and said calmly, “Sam, if we were talking about a headache, I would
let you have your way because you deserve that right. However, we are talking a
severe injury and I can’t let you have a say in this. I’m sorry.”
Sam nodded slightly and moved his hand to touch Gabriel’s arm. He said quietly,
“I’ve never really been given a choice in life… I’m tired. I want my brother.”
Gabe nodded and said quietly, “Go to sleep, Sam. I will be here when you wake
up.”
Sam looked at Gabe with a seriousness, Gabe had never seen from Sam before. He
suspected it was the drugs but he couldn’t say for sure. Sam’s voice was
equally as serious when he spoke, “Will you tell me what it is like to be free
when I wake up?”
Gabe frowned and said quietly, “Sure Sam, just get some rest. You’re safe. I
promise.”
Gabriel watched as Sam drifted to sleep and he felt terrible. He wished he
could snap his fingers and make this whole mess go away. Now he knew he was
going to have to work even harder to gain Sam’s trust and hopefully eventually
his love.
Gabriel opened up Sam’s drawer on his nightstand and pulled out a blank
postcard and an ink pen. He sat down on the floor next to Sam's side of the
bed. He looked at the front of the card and saw it was covered in Mike and
Ike’s.He gave a silent laugh because he thought the candy looked like pills.
Gabriel flipped the card over and wrote:
Sam,
Today, I learnt that you are a good and pure soul. I aspire to be like you. I
am honored and humbled to be part of your life. The only thing I miss is the
chance to protect you from the cruelty of the world.
I love you.
Gabriel
Then Gabriel slipped the postcard under Sam’s family photo in the hope Sam
would find it when he woke up. 
***** Chapter 9 *****
Dean found college alright. It wasn’t exactly his thing per se but it was
alright. He was determined to do this for Sam. He knew that by living with
John, he wasn’t getting the full college experience as his quirky little tutor
Cas would say. But that was okay with Dean. In the last few months, Dean had
spent more time with his father than they had in years.
It made Dean realize how little he actually knew about the guy. Sure, he knew
about his dad and he knew about his dad’s likes and dislikes but that was just
the surface of who his dad was. Now, Dean was getting to know someone he never
had the chance to know before. At first when they stopped hunting, Dean never
heard his father laugh and he never saw his father smile. Even when, Sam and
Dean were kids they never saw that sort of behavior from John.
Now, John was smiling and laughing. He would talk to Dean about things outside
of hunting, cars, and classic rock music. He would talk about women, television
shows, and sometimes things that reminded him of happier times. Dean liked that
his dad was settling into life and was no longer obsessed.  However, Dean was
sad that Sam missed this. He knew this was what Sam always wanted and now his
little brother wasn’t even alive to see it.
Dean was eating breakfast before he had to go to class. It was different
because his dad was sitting across from him at the table eating his own
breakfast, sipping on coffee, and reading the morning paper. It was such the
picture of normal life that Dean still hadn't gotten used to it.
John huffed a breath and pulled the paper down to look at Dean. He said with
interest, “Hey Dean, listen to this.”
Dean looked up and asked, “What is it a case?”
John pulled the paper down a little further and shook his head no. He had the
same level of interest when he spoke again, “No, we hung that hat up but if
something shows up locally I guess we could look into it. I just don’t want it
to get in the way of your studies or our jobs.”
Dean shook his head. He grinned when he asked in disbelief, “Wow, who are you
and what have you done with my father?” Dean knew full well before Sam died,
his father didn’t care about his education or Sam’s education. His focus was on
the hunt and hearing his father wanting him to go to college was still surreal
to Dean.
John smiled back at Dean. He knew Dean was trying to be playful but he also
knew part of Dean was serious. John knew he hadn’t been a very good father in
the past. He knew he was using this time now to make it up to Dean. He had to
make it up to Dean because Dean was the only one he had left to make anything
up too.
John cleared his throat and went back to the news article. He didn’t want to
have an emotional moment his son this early in the morning. He stated clearly,
“Twenty guards are scheduled to be executed today with a public audience.”
Dean leaned back in his chair and shook his head, “Why?”
John frowned, “The official reason according to the paper is they all had sex
with a female slave. The paper says there are rumors about them attempting to
force a male slave to rape the female slave. The male slave refused and was
nearly beaten to death for disobeying the guards.”
Dean lifted up his coffee and took a drink as he thought about that. He had
never heard of a male slave surviving past the first day and he had certainly
never heard of one coming home after their 21st birthday. Dean shrugged and
dismissed his father’s remarks. “I doubt the rumors are anything more than
propaganda. The official reason is probably all there is too it. Did they kill
the female slave?”
John skimmed the article again and said sadly, “I do not know. I certainly hope
not.”
Dean took another sip of his coffee and stood up. He firmly said, “I hope that
the guards they are killing are the ones that either hurt or killed Sam. I know
I will never know which one of those asshats killed him or if it was a Novak.
But just the thought of them getting what was coming to them makes my heart
beat a little faster.”
John put down the paper and glared at Dean. His voice was rough, “Dean don’t
make the same mistakes I did. I was so revenge driven to kill demons after Mary
tried to trade Sam in a deal, I became blind to raising you boys. I thought I
was avenging Sam, but really I was not giving him what he needed.”
Dean picked up his plates and looked at his dad, “Yeah well, a little bit of
your focus did keep the demons away from Sam and it kept the demon deal from
going through. Sam would be in Hell if you didn’t do that. Now at least, he’s
in Heaven. I can’t imagine him not being in Heaven. He was a good kid.”
John gave a weak smile and said, “You don’t have to defend me, Dean. But I
understand what you’re saying. I hope Sammy is enjoying Heaven.”
++
Dean was working at the bar. It came easily to him. Serving drinks with a
little flirtation was easy for him to fake. He was getting a larger sexual
appetite but for the most part; he ignored his hormones. Dean knew it would be
easy to give a girl or a guy free drinks for hours with the promise of sex
later, but Dean wouldn’t do that. To Dean, that was too much like whoring
himself and it would cut down on his tips.
Even though, Dean lived with John. He was still responsible for the electric,
phone, internet, and car insurance bills. Dean didn’t see it as a big deal. He
knew he was just doing his part. Dean thought Sam would be proud of him for
having an honest job and not trying to scam people. At least, he hoped Sam
would be proud.
Dean was wiping down the counters and glancing at the TV in the bar off and on.
They were broadcasting the executions. Dean knew the moment Lucifer walked out
that it wasn’t going to be a simple hanging. It was going to be bloody, slow,
and painful. The very thought of that sent chills up Dean’s spine. He hoped
Lucifer wasn’t the one who killed Sam.
Dean was watching Lucifer circle around the first guard on TV when Cas walked
into the bar. Dean looked away from the TV and walked over to Cas. He smiled at
his tutor and said happily, “So Cas, are you here for the college experience?”
Cas glanced up at Dean and he wasn’t sure if Dean was being serious or not. He
was here to figure out college drinking habits and the social order. He didn’t
know Dean worked at this bar. Bluntly Cas replied, “I suppose you could say
that. I read that it is customary for college students to drink large amounts
of cheap beer in bars. Then go home and eat cold pizza for breakfast.”
Dean raised an eyebrow and laughed. He shook his head and said happily, “Cheap
beer then? Do you want the cheapest we have or the most popular with the
college students?”
Cas didn’t realize there would be a difference but he was eager to figure it
out. Quickly Cas said, “I would like to try them both.”
Dean nodded and pulled out two beers from under the bar. He sat them in front
of Cas and opened them. Then Cas handed Dean a twenty. Dean started to go over
to the register to get Castiel’s change when he heard Cas say, “Please keep the
change, Dean.”
Dean stopped and turned around. He gave Cas a look of disbelief and said
incredulously, “Dude, you have $15.50 in change due to you. That is a lot of
money. I can’t keep that.”
Cas was confused. He didn’t realize such a small sum of money could be so much
to Dean. He never realized how much his life of wealth had kept his sheltered
from the struggles of people like Dean. He was curious when he spoke, “I do not
understand why you would think that is a large sum of money. It will not even
pay for one textbook.”
Dean gathered up the change anyways. He glanced at the TV to see Lucifer
scalping someone. He turned his focus back to Cas. He sat the change down on
the counter in front of his tutor and said calmly, “Cas, I grew up dirt poor.
Sometimes, all I had for dinner was 10 cent noodles that I had to share and
sometimes I didn’t even have a way to cook the noodles. Life is hard, Cas, or
at least it was.. is for me.” He pointed at the money and said firmly, “Someone
giving me this much money would be a blessing when I was growing up.”
Cas nodded and said slowly, “I’m sorry your life was so difficult. I had no
idea such things truly existed but please keep the money. Consider it a
blessing or just a tip for good service.”
Dean smiled and pocketed the money. He started wiping down the counter again
and looked around the mostly empty bar. All the patrons appeared to be doing
well on their drinks. Dean looked at Cas in the eyes and said softly, “Thanks
Cas. This means a lot to me.”
++
Dean returned home from working his shift. He had a decent night with tips so
he couldn’t complain. Cas was the highest tipper he had, which was a little
awkward in Dean’s mind. He was certain that Cas had a sheltered life and for
some reason Dean was starting to feel the urge to show Cas what life is like.
He was beginning to believe that while Cas had money, Cas had never actually
lived. Dean decided that he was going to slowly work on Cas as a reward for the
tutoring.
Still even with Dean’s new project in his sights, he felt the urge to see Sam’s
words tonight. The talk about poverty really brought back a lot of memories for
Dean. Most of them were bad memories. He remembered wrapping blankets around
him and Sam on cold nights. He remembered holding Sam tightly in his arms as he
could and seeing his own breath in the cold room. He remembered hoping Sam
wouldn’t freeze. He remembered rubbing Sam’s belly as he tried to ease his
brother’s hunger pains while ignoring his own.  There was a lot Dean remembered
that he wished they never had to live through.
Dean flipped through Sam’s box of postcards until he saw one that spoke to him.
It was a painting. On the front of the card was a couple inside a worn house.
The walls had holes that showed the outside world. The couple’s bed and
clothing was tattered. He man was ill on the bed and the woman was sitting on
the floor praying. Dean stared at the picture for a moment and he wondered why
Sam would pick that card. It had no words on it, just the picture. Dean knew it
was supposed to represent poverty, but out of all the postcards to steal why
would Sam choose this one? Dean didn’t know but he did know the picture on the
postcard was an accurate representation of the pain he felt inside at the
moment.
Dean flipped over the card to read Sam’s words. He hoped it would give him some
insight into his brother.
“Dean found a soup kitchen and we both got to eat tonight. I will miss the
generosity of these people, they kept Dean and me from going hungry and they
gave me this postcard!”
Dean felt a little twinge of pain his chest. He couldn’t place where this was.
They had ate a lot of soup kitchens over the years. Sometimes, it was the only
meal they got in a day. However, by looking at Sam’s handwriting and how
carefully Sam wrote ‘generosity’, Dean guessed that Sam was around 8 or 9.
Dean carefully put the postcard back in the box and he whispered, “You don’t
have to worry about being hungry anymore, Sammy.”
***** Chapter 10 *****
Sam was lonely sometimes, but he tried not to let that bother him. He only went
downstairs now to eat or cook with Gabriel. He found that he liked cooking with
Gabriel which he thought was odd because on his own he just didn’t enjoy it.
Sam wasn’t sure why that was, but he felt more confident in cooking with
Gabriel near.
The only other person Sam talked to was his tutor, who came in the afternoon
now when Gabriel was home. Part of Sam felt pathetic for Gabriel being with him
all the time, but he was honestly scared to be around anyone else. The new
guards and the other slaves have not spoken to Sam, which was fine with him. He
could feel their eyes on him sometimes and he thought he could feel their
judgment.
He knew Gabriel was his only friend for all intents and purposes, but he also
knew that Gabriel wanted something from him. Sam knew that the moment Gabriel
determined him to be old enough, he was going to be asked to have sex with him.
Right now, Sam did not want to do that and he wasn’t sure he ever would want to
do that with anyone.
The very thought of having sex with anyone made him sick to the stomach. Images
of Candy Apple laying on the floor just replayed in his mind when he thought
about sex. He didn’t want to end up like her and he didn’t want to be treated
like a sexual object. Sam wondered if what happened to Candy Apple was just
want sex was like.
He heard about Dean’s exploits, but Dean never showed any more regard for
whoever he courted than guards. Sam knew Dean never called them names to their
face, hit them, or forced them, but when Dean would tell the story. He would
call them sluts or any number of other things. Dean didn’t want a relationship
with them and the guards didn’t want a relationship with Candy Apple. They just
wanted sex.
Sam knew that Gabriel left him a postcard a couple months ago after he was
beaten. It was nice of him, Sam thought, but he didn’t understand why Gabriel
did it and Sam wasn’t entirely sure what Gabriel said was true. Sam wondered if
Gabriel wanted a romance or something like what was in the movies. He wasn’t
sure how romance related to the sexual acts he heard about from Dean or saw
happen since he became a slave. He didn’t think it was possible to be loved and
have sex.
He knew he was probably just confused and he should talk to Gabriel about it
because he had no one else to talk to about it. Sam knew Gabriel wanted him to
talk about things like this or whatever was on his mind. It was just Sam didn’t
know how to approach that subject with someone who wants to have sex with him.
He wasn’t sure if it would help his understanding or confuse him more.
Sam was currently getting his back rubbed by Gabriel. It had become an every
night thing. Gabriel was concerned about the scarring on Sam’s back and massage
was supposed to help keep the skin from getting tough. So every night, Sam had
to strip off his shirt and let Gabriel touch his back. He was nervous the first
time Gabriel did this.
He was afraid that Gabriel would start doing what the guards did or move his
hands down lower. But Gabriel never did and aside from the occasional cold
lotion it was pleasant. His problem with it now is sometimes he would feel
things. Sometimes, it would feel so good and he liked Gabriel’s hands on him so
much his groin started to take notice.
It was horrifying to Sam to get a hard on during a back rub. He was grateful
that the guards didn’t beat his chest because then Gabriel would see his
problem. Sam had no idea how to tell Gabriel that he found the back rubs
arousing but he didn’t want to have sex and he didn’t want to get touched on
his private parts.
Gabriel noticed Sam was tensing up about something. He was on Sam’s lower back
so he was almost done. He didn’t want to rush finishing. Sam’s back was heavily
scarred now, but the skin was getting softer and the scars were losing their
redness. Gabriel knew that short of surgery Sam was always going to have the
scars and he wasn’t going to make Sam go through surgery for vanity. He knew
the prescription lotion would help some, but it would never restore Sam’s back
to what it was before this happened.
He took his time and finished rubbing Sam’s back then he moved his hands away.
Gabriel noticed that Sam’s face was red and his eyes looked a little glassy. He
moved so me was lying next to Sam but not touching him. He knew Sam was
traumatized and he couldn’t get Sam to talk about it.
None the less, Gabriel said softly, “Sam, roll over and talk to me. What’s
going on? Please tell me what you’re thinking.”
Sam was scared because he didn’t have any blankets to cover himself and he was
hard. He stammered out, “No..no, I can’t… Please don’t make me.”
Gabriel gave Sam a confused look and shrugged. He calmly said, “Okay, you don’t
have to move, but will you tell me what is going on?” He paused and saw Sam’s
pained expression. He added, “Please Sam.”
Quietly Sam said, “I’m scared and I.. I just want to go home.”
Gabriel sighed and turned a little bit so he could make a better attempt at
looking Sam in the eyes. He wasn’t very successful. He spoke softly and with
kindness, “I know, Sam. After the incident with Zachariah I asked Michael to
set you free and let you go back to your family. He denied me. He said it would
be bad PR. I don’t really care about public relations, Sam. I want you to be
safe and happy, but I feel like I am failing at doing that.”
Sam took a couple deep breaths and said resolutely, “Michael is going kill me
before I turn 21. I’m scarred up and a guy. They never let the guys live. I
feel like I am on death row where I have to wait out my execution. Every day, I
wonder if today is the day I am going to get raped. I don’t even know if it is
possible to rape a slave since technically I don’t even own my body. I wish
they would just kill me and get it over with.”
Sam felt his erection fade with this conversation so he felt comfortable enough
to roll over and face Gabriel better. He was surprised to see that Gabriel just
looked upset and sad.
Gabriel nudged Sam’s face up with his fingertips to make eye contact and said
firmly, “Look at me. What the guards did to you is not why Michael said no. He
thought it would set a bad president and other families would think they could
get their kids back before it was time.” Gabe sighed and said, “The reason why
I keep you away from everyone is so you don’t get beaten again and so no one
touches you in a sexual way. I heard some of what Zachariah said. I know that
had to be scary for you. ”
Sam contemplated that for a moment. Then he said distantly, “You’re going to
touch me like that someday and I don’t want to do that.”
Gabriel took a couple deep breaths and said calmly, “Sam, I will never touch
you like that if you can’t consent to it. I thought that when you turn 16 you
would be old enough to make that choice. I don’t want you to feel pressured and
if you truly believe that you don’t have a choice because you’re a slave. I
won’t ever ask that of you until you’re free. I promise.”
Sam swallowed a couple times and looked at Gabriel with tear filled eyes. He
asked weakly, “You really mean that?”
Gabriel nodded and said firmly, “Yes. Sam, I told you that you will always have
a choice with me. That hasn’t changed. I promised you that I would keep you
safe regardless of what you choose. That hasn’t changed. The only thing that
has changed is I have grown quite fond of you. I love you and I don’t love many
people. The only other person I love is my brother, Castiel. The love I have
for you is not contingent on me fucking you or touching you in any way you
don’t want.”
Sam looked longingly at Gabriel. He really didn’t understand what made him so
special. He curled into himself a little bit and looked away. He started to let
the tears fall down his face. It didn’t take long until he was sobbing. He was
thinking about everything he lost, everything he could still lose, and he could
hear the guards’ voices as he cried.
Gabriel wasn’t sure what to do when Sam broke down in front of him. He wanted
to comfort Sam but he didn’t want to make Sam uncomfortable. Tentatively
Gabriel asked, “Sam, is it okay if I hold you?”
Sam shook as he sobbed but he nodded his head yes. Even though he was afraid
sometimes, he did feel safer when Gabriel was near. Sam felt Gabriel take him
into his arms. He felt his back pressed up against Gabriel’s chest and Gabe’s
arms wrapped around his waist. Gabriel kept his hands high enough so Sam
wouldn’t think he was trying to make a move.
Gabriel held Sam in his arms until Sam cried himself to sleep. He had never
felt so helpless in his life. He was slowly starting to realize that Sam’s fear
was not coming from getting beaten. It was coming from the repeated threats of
sexual assault. He wished he could make Sam’s memories of those threats and
memories of those actions played out on others disappear.
Gabriel knew he couldn’t do that, but he did know he could work towards making
Sam feel like he had more choices.
+++
Sam woke up slowly in the morning. He could feel Gabriel’s arm wrapped loosely
around him. He reached up and touched Gabriel’s arm and he felt Gabriel stir in
bed.
Gabriel yawned and stretched while he kept an arm around Sam. He snuggled up a
little closer to Sam after doing a mental check to make sure he didn’t have a
morning wood. He was 100 percent certain that would traumatize Sam.
Gabriel did decide to set his plan in action. He sleepily said to Sam, “I was
thinking. I want to give you more choices and chances to do what you want to
do. So I want you to pick something for us to do together that you have never
done before.” Gabriel didn’t get a response from Sam. Instead he got a look
that was a mix between complete not understanding and fear. Gabriel sighed and
asked, “Would it be better if I gave you a couple choices and let you pick
one?”
Sam took a deep breaths to steady his breathing. He wasn’t sure what Gabriel
wanted out of this. He was feeling off from letting his emotions overflow last
night. Even though he wanted choices in life and to know what it is like to be
free, he didn’t think he could emotionally deal with that right now. Sam didn’t
trust his voice not to sound pathetic so he nodded his acceptance to Gabriel’s
request.
Gabriel smiled and said contemplatively, “Humm.. We could go for a walk
outside. I know that you don’t have shoes but I could get you some for the
walk.” He paused to gauge Sam’s reaction. “We could go swimming. I have a pool
outback. It’s heated so the water is nice and warm.” Gabriel paused again to
see that Sam wasn’t having much of a positive reaction to the idea of going
outside. So he changed tactics, “We could watch some movies together. I like
doctor sitcoms.” Gabriel paused and saw Sam frown at that suggestion. He took
it as a good sign. “Okay, one more choice then you have to pick one. It is
close to the holidays. We could spend the day baking cookies.”
Sam was quiet for a moment. He wasn’t too keen on the idea of going outside. He
wanted to get some sunshine but it would put him out in the open and after
being inside for so long he wasn’t sure he could handle that. Sam cleared his
throat in the hopes it would make his voice sound stronger and not as weak as
he was feeling inside. “I think I would like to bake cookies with you. I’ve
never done that. I’ve gone on walks, swimming, and watched TV before.” Sam
chewed on his lip for a moment then he asked curiously, “But don’t you have
class today?”
Gabriel leaned up on the bed to look at Sam in the eyes. He shrugged and said
happily, “I can play hooky if I want too. But I am shocked that you have never
baked cookies before. We are going to have so much fun!”
Sam nodded and looked nervously up at Gabriel, “Um yeah, my brother did most of
the cooking and we rarely had an oven.”
Gabriel pulled off Sam and frowned before putting on a cheerful face, “Well,
today you are going to learn about the art of cookie baking. Maybe we will even
send some to Castiel. He doesn’t care for sweets but he has this obsession with
getting the full college experience. I think a care package with cookies would
add to it.”
Sam gave a light laugh and said, “Okay, we can do that.” He paused for a moment
and asked, “Do you think that we could share them with Candy Apple and
Lollipop?”
 Gabriel hummed for a moment, “Yes, I think we should. They deserve nice things
too.”
After they got cleaned up Gabriel and Sam wandered downstairs. Sam was nervous
about being outside of his little safe haven, even if Gabriel was with him. Sam
went over to the kitchen counter and waited for Gabriel’s instructions.
Gabriel turned to one of the guards. A tall black man and said, “Hey, run to
town and pick up a couple dozen donuts and some sausage rolls.” He pulled out
some money from his back pocket and handed it to the guard. The guard looked
momentarily confused before pocketing the money and leaving.
Gabriel turned back to Sam and then he said, “Okay now that we have breakfast
on the way. We should start mixing. I think we should start with sugar cookies
because we will have to let the dough setup in the refrigerator.”
Sam nodded but didn’t say anything. Gabriel handed him a card with the recipe
on it and Sam pulled all of the ingredients. Sam carefully measured and mixed
each ingredient under Gabriel’s supportive and watchful eye. He found it
relaxing and sort of rewarding. He was amused when Gabriel let him eat raw
cookie dough. He was surprised when he found out frosting is nothing but
powdered sugar, butter, vanilla, and milk.
After several hours of baking, Sam and Gabriel had managed to create a wide
variety of cookies and ate way too many donuts. They made peanut butter
cookies, chocolate chip cookies, oatmeal raisin, sugar, and some other kinds
Sam didn’t recognize. Gabriel let Sam decorate most of the sugar cookies. Sam’s
hands were sticky by the end of it and he realized he wasn’t very artistic.
Gabriel didn’t seem too concerned about his artistic ability for which Sam was
grateful. Gabriel seemed more concerned about eating all of the frosting than
Sam’s decorating.
The evening ended with them boxing up a variety of the cookies for Castiel.
Gabriel included instructions as to why people send care packages and how he
should share the cookies with his friends. Sam chuckled at the letter, which
made Gabriel smile.
++
Before bed, Sam pulled out his blank postcards. He hadn’t done one since the
beating. He honestly couldn’t think about much to be happy about. However,
today was a good day and Sam thought he should remember that. He knew it was
important to remember the good days in a place like this.
Sam was glad Gabriel didn’t ask about sending anything to Dean or his dad. He
knew they would have already mourned and believed they put him to rest. Sam
wanted to believe Gabriel when Gabriel told him that he would get out of this
alive. But Sam didn’t want to give his family false hope, if they were really
only going to get a box of ashes in the mail. Even though it hurt, Sam thought
it was better this way.
Sam found a postcard with cookies on the front. He thought it was fitting given
their day. He flipped over the card and wrote:
“Today, I learnt how to make cookies and I enjoyed baking them. I will miss
seeing the look of delight on Gabriel’s face when he ate the first cookie I
ever made.”
Gabriel sat down on the bed and watched Sam carefully put away the postcard. He
thought Sam was cute sometimes, but he knew he would never tell Sam that. The
last thing he wanted was for the kid to become more self-conscious. Instead he
looked at Sam and said with admiration, “I am proud of you, Sam. You really
seemed happy today. It was nice to see you smile.”
Sam pulled off his shirt so Gabriel could rub his back. He grinned at Gabriel
and said quietly, “Thank you for giving me this day.”   
***** Chapter 11 *****
By some grace of God, Dean managed to pass all of his classes with an A. He was
pretty pleased with himself, even though he knew, there were much harder
classes in his future. He decided not to think too much about that right now.
He had a tutor who was amazing and quite possibly the weirdest person Dean had
ever met.
Dean remembered how he became concerned at one point that Cas may not be human
because he didn’t understand anything. Cas didn’t understand pop culture
references, most jokes, and how to do stuff like ride a bike. Dean was fairly
certain Cas had never ridden on a bus before even though he never asked. So he
did what any good hunter would do and he ran Cas through every test in the
book, twice. The results surprised Dean, Cas was completely human as far as he
could tell.
He knew that he had to do something to show Cas the reward for helping him with
his algebra class. Dean knew it had to be good because Cas was going to be his
tutor again next term. He knew Cas had a thing about getting the full college
experience so he was trying to figure out what to do to make that happen. He
didn’t really want to get Cas drunk. Dean had a feeling he would be an
emotional and puke ridden drunk, so he was going to try to avoid that.
Dean also knew Cas had a curiosity about being penniless. He wondered if he
should do some ramen noodle cooking with Cas or take him for a ride on public
transportation. Dean didn’t really think public transportation indicated that
someone was poor, but he thought it was something Cas had never experienced
because of his wealth. He wasn’t sure.
So here Dean was sitting at their kitchen table slowly drinking a beer and
wondering about what to do for Cas. He felt good despite not knowing what do
for his tutor. He hadn’t been hungry in months, they had enough money to run
the heat, and they were paid up on their rent. Life was pretty good for Dean.
It was better than it had been in a long time.
Dean heard a knock on his apartment door. He sighed and put his beer down. He
walked over and opened the door. He was surprised to see Cas standing there.
Dean had not told Cas where he lived.  Dean saw that Cas had a box in his hands
and he gave his tutor an uncertain look. Nervously Dean said, “Hi Cas, what are
you doing here?”
Cas shrugged and felt a little uneasy. His personal guards had thrown a fit
about him going to such a rough neighborhood, but he liked Dean. He really
wasn’t sure why, it was just Dean didn’t treat him with kid gloves like most
people tended too. Dean would tell him the honest truth or at least the truth
in his opinion and Cas had grown to appreciate that about the man.
Cas put a smile on his face and said cautiously, “My brother sent me cookies
and he advised I should share them with the people I tutor. You are the only
one that lives locally, everyone else went home for the holidays. I hope I am
not intruding.”
Dean shook his head and sighed. He opened the door a little further and said,
“No, you’re not intruding. Please come in.” Dean moved out of the way so Cas
could enter his apartment.
Cas walked in and looked around. He was fairly certain the walls at some point
were white. Although now they were stained yellow with age. It was darker in
some spots than in others. The home was clean, very clean. Cas wondered if Dean
and his father contracted a slave to do the cleaning, but he thought better
than to ask. The furniture was old and worn. There were no family pictures on
the walls. Instead Cas noticed that sigils were posted at various places
throughout the apartment. Cas found the sigils curious. Most people didn’t
bother with it.
Cas handed the box toward Dean and nervously, “You have a quaint place. Would
you like to share these cookies? I do not know what types he sent.”
Dean took the box of cookies from Cas and sat it down on the table. He opened
it and pulled out the first bag. He scrunched up his brow because whoever wrote
the tag labeling what type of cookies they were had the same handwriting as his
little brother. Dean frowned slightly at that. He vaguely remembered baking
cookies with his mom, before it came to light what she did. 
He shook off the memory of his mother and opened up the bag of cookies. They
were snickerdoodle cookies or so the label said. He had never had this type of
cookie before. Dean took a cookie out and handed it to Cas then he took one for
himself. He smiled and said, “Thanks, Cas.” Dean bit into the cookie and it was
good. He decided it was sort of like a sugar cookie with cinnamon. He didn’t
think it was a bad cookie but the thought the name was odd.
They ate various types of cookies for a while. Dean made sure to complement
each one. He did start to notice there were two distinct sets of handwriting on
the cookie labels. When his stomach started to hurt from eating too many
cookies, Dean asked, “So your brother made these?”
Cas nodded and said with certainty, “Yes, I think his… partner helped him.”
Dean raised an eyebrow at Cas. He had always pegged Cas for a highly
conservative guy and the idea that his brother could be gay intrigued him. He
honestly found it funny, but he wasn’t going to laugh at Cas. He liked guys on
occasion so he knew he wasn’t being judgmental. Playfully Dean asked,
“Partner?”
Cas sighed and said calmly, “Yes, my brother Gabe is gay. He has a sl… partner
that lives with him.”
Dean laughed and said happily, “Cas, you crack me up. You almost called Gabe’s
partner a slut.”
Cas tilted his head at Dean and gave his a contemplative look. He knew that he
screwed up and almost called Gabe’s underage rescue project a slave which the
kid was. He wasn’t too happy about Gabriel taking a slave. It went against
everything they had planned since childhood. They were supposed to break the
mold together, instead Gabriel took a slave.
Cas had no idea what Gabriel did with Sam. He knew they were probably having
sex, which Cas did not agree with. He honestly thought Gabriel should have let
the kid die. He didn’t want Sam’s death out of cruelty but mercy. He knew how
his older brothers could be. Cas had a very traumatic childhood because of
them. He had watched people get tortured and killed by his brothers like it was
nothing for as long as he could remember.
It caused Cas to lock inside himself. He shut down socially for years. He
didn’t talk to or socialize with anyone. Gabe used to do the talking for Cas
and Gabe kept the bullies away at school. Cas knew that Gabe liked to watch TV
after school so he should get the pop culture references Dean talked about, but
he had always just shut his mind down and blanked out. He never left his own
head unless it was Gabe calling his name.
Dean was concerned he may have upset Cas with his statement based on the frown
on his face and the silence that went on for a couple minutes. He apologized,
“I’m sorry, Cas. I didn’t mean to call Gabe’s partner a slut or to infer that
you were trying to all him that.”
Cas nodded and smiled. It was a fake smile but he thought it would pass as
real. He was mellow when he spoke, “I know, Dean. It is just sometimes I fear
my brother doesn’t have Sam’s best interest at heart.”
Dean was speechless for a few moments for no other reason than Gabe’s partner
had the same name as his dead brother. Then he stammered out, “Oh, I am sorry
to hear that. I hope your brother isn’t too much of a dick to Sam.”  
Cas nodded and frowned, “He means well.” Cas really did think Gabe meant well.
He just wasn’t sure if forcing some poor kid into a life of slavery when the
kid asked for death instead was the right thing to do. Cas wasn’t an expert on
anything, but he couldn’t get the look of desperation in that kid’s eyes out of
mind for months. He knew he couldn’t have just killed the kid and he thought
Gabriel was probably thinking the same thing. Cas just wished he knew how to
make it right for the kid.
Dean picked up the conversation with a lighthearted joke, “So are you telling
me that Gabe had Sam slaving away in the kitchen all day baking cookies?”
Cas winced because even though Dean was joking that was exactly what happened.
Cas lied and said, “I am sure it wasn’t that bad. My understanding is Sam likes
to cook.” Cas paused and told the edited truth, “I have honestly only met Sam
once and he was injured. I am certain there is a lot about him I do not know.”
Dean chuckled and said, “Well Cas, I think Gabe is a very lucky man. Although,
if Sam bakes like this all the time he is going to get fat.” Dean had a mental
picture of Gabe’s Sam in his head. He was picturing an extremely stereotypical
gay man, probably with bleach blond hair and dolled up eyes but was overweight
with his own set of man boobs.
Cas smiled and said calmly, “Perhaps.”
Dean changed the subject after that to questioning Cas what he would like to do
as his reward for helping him pass. After several failed suggestions, Cas
decided that he wanted to ride on a bus. Dean found this humorous. He found it
especially humorous when Cas asked him if homeless people sleep on the bus.
Dean made a promise to Cas that in the summer when the weather was better they
could pretend to be homeless for a day.
++
Dean retired to his bedroom after eating a healthy supper of cookies. Cas left
almost all of the cookies with him. Cas told Dean it was a blessing and Dean
really didn’t want to argue his tutor’s generosity on this. He knew his dad
would like the cookies and he knew Cas could not eat all those cookies on his
own.
He laid down on his bed and thought back to the evening. He hadn’t thought much
about Sam all day until Cas mentioned that his brother’s boyfriend’s name was
Sam. It made Dean feel a little ashamed for pushing his Sam out of his
thoughts. Dean knew everything him and his father were doing was in part
because that is what Sam wanted out of life. It was honestly a happier and more
stable life. It made Dean wish they would have listened to Sam sooner.
Dean opened the drawer on his nightstand. He pulled out Sam’s box of postcards.
He opened it up and said to himself, “Okay Sammy, let me see what words of
wisdom you have for me.” He flipped through until he found a holiday postcard.
Dean pulled it out and looked at the front. It had a simple Christmas tree with
a cat stuck in the tree. He knew it was meant to be a humorous card. Dean
flipped over the card and read what Sam wrote:
“Dean and I had Christmas alone this year, but it was great because we had
canned spaghetti and cereal today. I will miss getting to feast with my
brother.”
He remembered the Christmas when their dad wasn’t there. As he recalled, John
was on a hunt somewhere and Sam was disappointed. Dean had broken into
someone’s house and stole their non-perishable foods and milk so they would
have something to eat. He could hardly consider their meal choices for that day
a feast, but he guessed that to Sam it was.
Dean wondered if they had feasts in Heaven. He wondered what Sam would think if
he ever actually saw a feast, a real feast. He guessed that Sam’s stomach would
hurt from overeating, much like his stomach currently hurt from eating too many
cookies.
 
***** Chapter 12 *****
Sam was staring out the window of the study, like he did most days while he
waited for Gabriel to get home and didn’t have anything else to do. He would
always make sure his homework and chores were done before he took his seat by
the window.
He was lonely and it had gotten worse as the months went by. Sam knew Gabriel
was trying to help him to not be so lonely, but it was hard when he never spoke
to anyone except Gabriel and his tutor. Sam knew he didn’t exactly have a
personable relationship with his tutor. He couldn’t even remember what the
guy’s name actually was. Sam had to call him Sir and Gabriel rarely addressed
him. Sam made a mental note to pay attention the next time Gabriel talked to
the guy so he would know his name.
But right now, Sam was just looking at the outside world. Sometimes, Gabriel
would make him go outside for a walk. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to go
outside. It was just that he was afraid of being so out in the open. They never
left the grounds of Gabriel’s mansion but the mansion grounds were large. It
had neatly groomed gardens and wooded walking trails.
Sometimes, when Sam would walk along the wooded trail he would wonder what his
dad would think of him now. He thought John would probably think he was weak or
pathetic. Sam knew he wasn’t the hunter he was before. He wasn’t sure if it was
the beatings or the isolation that caused that part of him to die. Sam knew it
didn’t really matter but still sometimes he wondered.
The reason why Sam liked to look out the window is sometimes he would see
people. Sometimes, there were guards or the two household slaves. They would
talk to each other and Sam became fascinated by the way they would just walk up
to each other and talk. Sometimes, he would imagine their conversation and what
they were saying. Sometimes, he would make himself part of the imaginary
conversation.
Sam sighed and leaned his head against the window. He knew he was losing it. He
had no idea how he was going to deal with six more years of this. Sam knew that
if he did survive this, there was no telling what Dean and his dad were going
to get back. He pushed that thought out of his mind and reminded himself that
he was already dead to his family and he shouldn't make them suffer, not even
in his mind.
Gabriel was watching Sam from the doorway. He was worried about Sam and he was
considering about taking another slave from the next round just to give Sam a
friend. He had a feeling, if Sam didn’t socialize more Sam was going to have a
breakdown. Gabriel knew that he wanted to be Sam’s friend and Sam had opened up
to him a little bit more, but he knew deep down Sam was still scared of him.
But today, Gabriel was determined to make Sam feel special or at least show Sam
his playful side. He walked into the room and sat down a cake box on the table.
He cleared his throat to get Sam’s attention. Gabriel had learnt that if he
snuck up on Sam, the kid would nearly jump out of his skin and he would see
fear in Sam’s eyes. He didn’t like to see that.
Calmly in an attempt to hide his excitement Gabriel said, “Sam, come over here
please. I have a surprise for you.”
Sam carefully unfolded himself and walked over to Gabriel. He was uncertain
about what Gabriel wanted. It wasn’t normal for Gabriel to be home at this time
of day. Sam knew he was going to miss seeing the guards drinking coffee on
their break outside on the lawn. He figured that was okay though. He could
always catch it another day.
Once Gabriel was near he grinned and opened up the cake box. Sam looked down at
the cake. It was decorated in baby pink and blue ribbons on a white background.
The wording on the cake was, “Happy Quinceanera Sam!” Needless to say, Sam was
confused by this. He wasn’t a girl and he wasn’t Hispanic. He had also
completely forgotten it was his birthday. Sam had just assumed he didn’t have
those anymore until he was free.
Sam gave Gabriel a questioning look but didn’t say anything. Gabriel took that
as a sign and joyfully said, “Happy birthday, Sam! Today is your quinceanera! I
thought about getting you a dress to wear.” Gabriel was joking. However, Sam
didn’t take it as a joke. He took a step back from Gabriel and wrapped his arms
around himself protectively. Then Gabriel saw the look in Sam’s eyes he was
trying to avoid seeing. He saw fear.
Gabriel backtracked. He put his hands up to show he meant no harm and said
calmly in a soothing voice, “I’m joking, Sam. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
Sam nodded and gave a fake smile. He quietly said, “Thank you, Gabriel. I
forgot it was my birthday.”
Gabriel frowned. This was by far the saddest birthday experience Gabriel had
ever had and he thought that was saying something. He remembered the year
Lucifer got him and Castiel a birthday cake modeled after the operation game.
Lucifer had the cake made to look like the man was bleeding when they cut into
their cake. It was rather disturbing and as Gabriel recalled Castiel refused to
eat any of it at first.
Gabriel shook that memory away and decided to insert some happiness. He smiled
and said, “Well then, happy fifteenth birthday, Sam. Do you want me to bring
out the candles for your cake so you can make a wish?”
Sam shook his head no and said quietly, “No, nothing I could wish for is going
to happen anyways so what is the point?”
Gabriel raised an eyebrow and said calmly, “It’s tradition, Sam. I ask for
world peace every year and that doesn’t happen.”
Sam lowered his head and said quietly, “Oh.” He was silent for a moment then he
added, “I guess, if it pleases you we can do that.”
Gabriel sighed and decided not to pry into Sam’s messed up little mind today.
He wanted Sam to do stuff because he wanted too, not because he wanted Sam to
do it. It wasn’t that Gabriel didn’t like a little submission from Sam. It was
just more often than not Gabriel felt like he was sucking the life of out Sam.
He opened a shopping bag and pulled out some birthday candles. Gabe had gotten
two sets of candles. One was just regular birthday candles and the other was
trick candles. He had wanted to use the trick candles but he thought better of
it. Sam wasn’t doing well today and Gabriel knew he was already messing with
Sam’s established routine of staring out the window.
Gabriel carefully placed 15 candles in the cake and lit them. He grinned at Sam
and said, “Do you want me to sing happy birthday or do want to just blow the
candles out to make a wish?”
Sam frowned and said weakly, “I would like to just blow them out. No one has
ever sang happy birthday to me in my life, so I don’t really get the
significance of it.”
Gabriel opened his mouth and closed it a few times. He couldn’t believe that no
one had ever sang the happy birthday song to Sam. He decided to ask about that
later. Right now, he didn’t want Sam’s cake to catch on fire or get covered in
candle wax. He held up the cake and said happily, “Okay then, make a wish
birthday boy!”
Sam looked at Gabriel in the eyes briefly then he blew out the candles. He
didn’t wish for anything, even though he knew Gabriel asked him to wish for
something. Sam wanted one of two things. He wanted to either to get to go home
to his family or he wanted to die. While Gabriel had the power to grant the
latter, Sam knew Gabriel wouldn’t kill him.
Gabriel sat the cake down and smiled. He said joyfully, “Good job. Now don’t
tell me what you wished for. It could ruin it.” Gabriel took the candles out of
the cake then he carefully cut two pieces. He handed a piece to Sam with a fork
and took the other for himself. He took a bite of his cake because he knew Sam
wouldn’t touch his until he took a bite. Then he watched Sam tentatively eat
his piece of cake.
After a few bites Sam spoke quietly, “Thank you, Gabriel. This is really good.”
Gabriel grinned and said happily, “You’re welcome, Sam. Now, how is it no one
had ever sang happy birthday to you?”
Sam glanced up and shrugged. He looked out the window briefly before returning
his gaze to Gabriel. He was uncomfortable when he spoke. “I moved schools a lot
so generally the teacher didn’t realize it was my birthday and I never got to
bring treats for the class on my birthday. So no one really knew.” He paused
and added, “We didn’t really have a lot of money so we didn’t celebrate or
anything. My brother and my dad would always tell me happy birthday but that
was about it. It was always just like any other day, you know?”
Gabriel frowned and said calmly, “Yeah, I know Sam. So you didn’t get a
birthday cake or anything?”
Sam snorted a laugh and said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Do you have any idea how much a birthday cake costs? We couldn’t afford that.
We could barely afford to eat most days and sometimes that didn’t happen
either.”
Gabriel scrunched up his brow and stated in disbelief, “You were going hungry
before you came here. I know you’ve put on weight but I assumed it was just you
filling out and growing up. I never thought that you were going hungry.”
Sam scrapped the last of the frosting off of his plate and ate it. Then he
calmly said with a little more strength in his voice, “I was used to it. I
never knew there could be anything different.” Sam got a contemplative look on
his face and said, “You know, it’s weird being around such an abundance of
everything.” There was more Sam wanted to say but it left it unsaid. He didn’t
want to seem ungrateful.
Gabriel grinned and said tossed his plate in the trash. He was pleased when he
said, “Well, abundance is one of the perks of being a Novak. One of the few
perks actually, but I don’t want to bore you with my self-loathing.” He paused
and watched as Sam looked at him as if he had all the answers in the world.
Gabriel cleared his throat and said, “Okay, so do you want to watch movies, go
outside, or play some board games?”
Sam was silent for a moment. He knew he would get to have more conversations
with Gabriel if they went outside but he was always scared to go outside. If
they played board games, then the game would dominate the conversation and Sam
knew that sometimes Gabriel purposefully lost to him. He didn’t really have
much of an interest in movies because he could do that alone. Watching movies
seemed like a waste when words could be exchanged.
Tentatively Sam said, “I think I want to go outside.”
Gabriel smiled and said happily, “Great, let me get you some clothes to change
into.”
Sam’s eyes went wide and he thought about how Gabriel mentioned a dress earlier
and he wasn’t comfortable dressing like a girl. He felt a slight tremble rack
his body and he weakly said, “Please don’t, I’m sorry… I’m sorry.”
Gabriel wasn’t sure what set Sam off. It could be any number of things. He had
found that he best way to calm Sam down was to clearly state his expectation.
“Sam, I am just going to get you some jeans, a shirt to cover your collar,
socks, and shoes. I am not going to watch you change your clothes. I want to
take you to town. There is a botanical garden on the university campus. I think
you’ll like it.”
Sam gave Gabriel a confused look and said, “But why wouldn’t you have me dress
like a slave?”
Gabriel rolled his eyes and said firmly, “Okay, as of today, you are wearing
regular clothes. I never liked that stupid uniform look anyways.” He paused and
said, “I want you to look like everyone else so you can interact with other
people without them knowing. I also don’t want to blow my cover. Everyone on
campus thinks I am Gabe Milton. I want to get through college without anyone
knowing who I am.”
Sam nodded and fidgeted. He tried to put on a brave face but knew he was
probably failing. He said, “Okay, I can do that. But won’t they know, I’m not
free when I call you master and I have to refer to them as sir or ma’am?”
Gabriel rolled his eyes and said firmly, “Not today Sam. Today, I am just
Gabriel and anyone you meet you call them by their name if you know it.”
++
Gabriel drove him and Sam to town. He knew his guards weren’t happy about
taking Sam off the premises without restraints but he couldn’t bring himself to
care. Gabriel knew Sam wouldn’t try to escape. Mostly because he knew if the
kid really wanted to escape he would have done it by now. Gabriel didn’t know
what was stopping Sam, but he guessed it was either self-preservation or a fear
that someone else would get hurt in the process.
When they stepped out of the car in the parking lot of the gardens. Gabriel
could see Sam almost trembling with fear. It was a weekend so they were a
little busy. Gabriel hadn’t counted on that but now he felt like a fool for not
thinking about it. He walked over to Sam and put an arm around him. It always
surprised Gabriel to see Sam cling onto him.
They walked in together and Gabriel kept a protective hand on Sam’s back. He
noticed that it kept Sam calm. He was pleased when Sam started talking to him
about random plant facts. Gabriel had no idea Sam knew so much about plants
until now. It was nice in Gabriel’s mind to see Sam loosen up and talk to him
like he was a regular guy. Sam even politely said excuse me to few patrons and
their kids. Gabriel was pleased when the patrons said their apologies back
because Sam’s face lit up a little bit. Sadly, Gabriel suspected it was because
this was the first time in months Sam had been treated like he wasn’t
invisible.
Everything was going fine until Gabriel caught sight of a pastor looking at
them critically. He figured it was just a homophobic nut job so he did his best
to ignore the man.
Gabriel was waiting for Sam outside the bathroom when he heard Sam talking to
someone. He stepped inside the men’s room but stayed out of sight. He heard
desperation in Sam’s voice, “Please Pastor Jim, don’t tell Dad and Dean I am
alive. I don’t want to get their hopes up.”
Gabriel now understood why the pastor was watching Sam. He knew Sam. He
listened as the pastor responded, “Sam, they need to know you’re alive. But I
want to know are they hurting you? You look healthier than I remember.”
Gabriel heard a bitter chuckle and heard Sam say, “No, not anymore. I am on
lockdown away from everyone except my Master because the guards beat me and
threaten to rape me. I’m lonely but I can’t complain. The Novak that owns me
doesn’t hit me, molest me, or verbally abuse me. He’s.. He’s actually kind of
nice. He talks to me like we’re equals and he is making sure I get to finish my
education.” Gabriel could hear the venom and resentment in Sam’s voice when he
called Gabriel his master. It hurt a little bit inside Gabriel.
Gabriel heard a skeptical, “Right,” from the pastor. Then he head the pastor
say, “I am guessing this Novak isn’t keeping you safe out of the goodness of
his heart. Considering they usually kill the boys on the first day. So what
does he want?”
Gabriel heard Sam get quieter, “He wants to have sex with me and take me as his
spouse once this is over. He’s gay, but he promised he wouldn’t touch me
against my will.”
The pastor replied curiously, “Is that who you’re with today?”
Gabriel could hear the pain in Sam’s voice, “I really can’t say. This is the
first time, I’ve been around people since I was taken. I don’t want to screw
this up. I can’t tell you his name. I’m sorry.”
The pastor calmly said, “It’s okay, Sam. I understand. You should probably get
back to your escort before you get in trouble. Can I have a hug?”
Gabriel heard the two men hugging and he slipped back out of the men’s room to
wait for Sam. Then Gabriel had an idea. He could get the pastor authorized to
visit Sam and he might be able to get Sam to be authorized to help out at the
church. It wasn’t uncommon for slaves to be assigned tasks like that.
Gabriel slipped back into the men’s room to see the two men pull apart from a
hug. He calmly said, “I heard you talking about me, Sam.” He put up a hand to
stop Sam’s impending apology. He turned his attention to the pastor, “I am
Gabriel Novak. I want to talk to you about how we can help Sam but I would like
to do it some place that isn’t the men’s bathroom. Would you be able to join us
for dinner tonight at my home?”
Pastor Jim nervously glanced from Sam to Gabriel and said, “Of course.”
++
Sam was reeling by the end of the day. Pastor Jim had filled out all the
paperwork over dinner to allow him to take Sam from Gabriel’s house twice a
week for a few hours in the morning. Pastor Jim would pick him up before
Gabriel left for class and drop him off after Gabriel was home so there was no
chance Sam would run into a guard with a whip.
Sam was excited despite the fact Sam knew that Pastor Jim was going to tell his
dad and Dean. He just didn’t know if he could face them right now. He decided
to cross that bridge later. Sam just didn’t want them to show up while he was
at the church with Pastor Jim. He didn’t want to see the look of shame or
disgust on their faces. He also didn’t want to give them hope that he would be
coming home someday.
Sam pulled out the postcard Gabriel bought him at the gardens. He grinned at
it. It had flowers covering the front and it was the first postcard he didn’t
steal from a place. Sam flipped it over and wrote.
“I had a great birthday today because I got to interact with other people and I
saw an old friend. I will miss getting to feel like a real person.”
***** Chapter 13 *****
It was Saturday night and Dean would normally be working at the bar until the
early hours of the morning. But today was different, today would have been
Sam’s fifteenth birthday. He was a little bummed and he wanted to get drunk or
cuddle with Cas, possibly both. His boss sent him home around nine because of
his funk.
Dean was grateful his boss was understanding. His boss’s best friend from
childhood had his name drawn so he understood Dean’s pain. His boss gave him a
fifty and told him to go home. Dean was grateful for the money. He was worried
about how much he could be losing by going home early.
Dean wandered the streets to his apartment. It was a quiet night. He was about
halfway to his place when a car pulled up beside him. It was Cas. Dean grinned
at Cas and said sheepishly, “Hey Cas.”
Cas looked at Dean critically for a few moments. Then he said calmly, “Dean,
why aren’t you at work?”
Dean shrugged and said in a depressed tone, “I got sent home. I’m not in
trouble though, my boss just took pity on me.”
Cas nodded and said carefully, “I see. Why don’t you get in the car? I can give
you a ride home.”
Dean dutifully got in the passenger seat of the car. He glanced over at Cas
briefly before wrapping his arms around himself. He felt so pathetic at the
moment. Dean didn’t want to have a breakdown in front of Cas. He took to
staring intently out of the window for the rest of the drive to his apartment.
Once they were there, Cas walked Dean up to his door and Dean let him inside.
Dean knew his father was with his girlfriend, Kate, so he may or may not be
home that night. Dean led Cas into his bedroom and closed the door to be on the
safe side. He leaned Cas against the door and gave Cas a passionate kiss.
Cas tentatively reciprocated then he pulled back. He put a hand on the back of
Dean’s neck and said firmly, “I know, I am not good at approaching these
things, but will you tell what is wrong? You’re not acting like yourself.”
Dean shrugged and stepped back. He shrugged off his jacket and threw it in the
corner. Dean rubbed his face a couple times and said, “My little brother was
murdered. Today would have been his fifteenth birthday.” Dean sat down on his
bed and put his face in his hands. He was willing himself to keep it together.
Dean felt the bed dip and Cas sat down next to him. He felt Cas put an arm
around him and kiss him on the temple.
Then Cas said, “I am sorry, Dean. Do you want to talk about it?”
Dean gave a sad smile and quietly, “No Cas, I don’t. It was the worst day of my
life. I can still hear his screams sometimes, you know?”
Cas did understand being able to hear screams that weren’t there. They plagued
him since childhood. Cas was never able to truly block out the screams and
expressions of those his brothers tortured and killed. As a child and teenager,
he never made friends because he was always afraid of them getting taken away
and not being able to stop his brothers.
Cas knew he couldn’t tell Dean all of that. For all he knew, Dean would think
that Cas was a monster like his brothers even though, he never tortured or
killed anyone. But Cas also knew that up until about a year ago he had never
done anything to help one of the slaves either.
Cas started to rub circles in Dean’s back and he said quietly, “I am sorry you
experienced that. I wish I could make your pain go away but I can’t.”
Dean nodded and gave a mischievous smile. He leaned over and kissed Castiel’s
lips then he said, “I think you might be able to distract me.”
Cas leaned Dean back on the bed. He started to kiss Dean passionately as Dean
pulled him closer. He could feel their bodies rubbing up against each other and
it just felt right. Cas let himself forget about all of the crap that had
plagued him all of his life and he started to snake his hands up Dean’s shirt.
It felt nice to feel Dean’s hard chest and belly under his hand. He knew Dean
must workout, even though he never saw Dean go to the gym.
He pulled Dean’s shirt up over his head. Then Cas leaned back and removed his
own shirt. He felt Dean’s hands on him. It sent little shocks of pleasure
through his body and he groaned when Dean started playing with his nipples. Cas
arched up and moaned loudly.
Then Dean abruptly stopped as his cell phone started ringing. Dean sat up and
muttered, “Sorry.” He got up and grabbed his jacket off the floor after trying
to adjust his erection. He pulled his cell phone out of the pocket on his
jacket.
Dean answered the phone, “This is Dean.”
He heard Pastor Jim on the other line. He sounded a little stressed, “Dean, it
is good to hear your voice. This is Pastor Jim. Where is your father?”
Dean frowned at Cas and sat back down on the bed. He said, “Um, with his
girlfriend I think. We stopped hunting so I could go to college. Why? What is
going on? We can’t really go on a hunt right now, but we may be able to help
with research.”
Pastor Jim was silent for a moment. Then he said curiously, “You’re going to
college and John Winchester is on a date with his girlfriend?”
Dean chuckled and leaned back on the bed to snuggle with Cas while he chatted.
“Um yeah, after Sammy died, Dad and I decided that maybe we should try it his
way. I feel like I am climbing the walls sometimes from being in one place so
long, but I think it is worth it.”
Pastor Jim was quiet again and Dean was starting to wonder what was up with the
man. When he heard the pastor say, “I just wanted to check and see how you were
doing since it is Sam’s birthday and all.”
Dean sighed and looked into Castiel’s eyes. He really wanted to get back to
making out with Cas instead of having a heart to heart with Pastor Jim about
how dead his brother is. In a noncommittal voice Dean said, “I’m managing.
Look, I don’t really want to talk about this right now. I am trying to keep my
mind off of things like that.”
Pastor Jim replied carefully, “I understand, Dean. But have you given any
thought to if your brother is still alive?”
Dean put a hand over his face and groaned. He was angry when he spoke.
“Seriously Pastor Jim? Sam is dead. They sent me his clothes in a fucking box.
His clothes were ripped and bloody from where they beat him to death. Do you
have any idea what it felt like to see that? I felt like a failure. Sam must
have been terrified and trust me, I know Sam was scared. I got to listen to and
watch him scream as they dragged him from our school.”
Dean heard Pastor Jim sharply say, “Dean, enough. I am not asking you this out
of malice. I want to know how you are doing and you seem to still be very
angry.”
Dean noticed that Cas looked a little wide eyed then he remembered that he had
never talked in detail about his little brother to Cas. It just hurt too much
to talk about it. Dean took a couple calming breaths then he said, “I’m sorry.
I didn’t mean to get angry with you. I know it’s not your fault. Dad and I are
working through it. We are putting away money to get a headstone for Sam once
we get his ashes back in a few years.” Dean sighed and quickly added, “I have
to go. Be safe.”
Dean could hear Pastor Jim talking on the other end of the line when he hung up
the phone. He turned back to Cas and pecked him on the lips but Cas was frozen
in his position.
It took a couple moments then Cas gave Dean a small smile. He quietly said,
“Your little brother was called to be a slave?”
Dean groaned and laid down next to Cas. He grumpily said, “Are you trying to
join the good pastor in being a boner kill?” He paused and added, “Yes, it was
last year. Sam was 14. He was a nerd and a hunter like my dad and me.” Dean
chuckled, “There is no way he would have submitted to them. He would have let
them kill him. Of course, that is what happens to all the male slaves anyways,
so I guess at least it’s a good thing Sam died without compromising himself.”
Castiel thought about what Dean was saying and he didn’t watch the processing
and subsequent murders of the young men last year. He did know that there was
one boy who resisted and Gabriel took pity on the boy. Castiel knew that boy’s
name was Sam. He wasn’t sure how Sam was doing these days or even if Gabriel’s
Sam and Dean’s little brother were one in the same.
Castiel knew he could see some similarities in the posture and gestures between
the two, but Castiel had only seen Sam twice. So he didn’t know if he was truly
seeing similarities or just hoping for them. He also didn’t know how to deal
with the likely possibly that his brothers killed his boyfriend’s little
brother. Cas didn’t think that would go over well and he suspected Dean would
be angry with him.
Castiel turned and wrapped his arm around Dean. He kissed Dean on the temple
and said, “I’m not trying to ruin the mood, Dean. I care about you and I want
to help you. I am truly sorry about your brother. If I knew you at the time, I
would have done everything I could to protect your brother.” Castiel honestly
meant that. He would have taken Sam as his own personal slave then let Sam do
as he pleased. But Castiel didn’t know Dean at the time so he didn’t save Sam
or anyone else who was murdered that night.
Dean rolled his eyes and softly kissed Cas back. He whispered as he started to
touch Castiel’s side. “You say that like you have some sway with the Novaks.”
Cas took a deep breath and decided not to tell Dean his real name tonight. He
wanted to find out what he could about Dean’s brother first and if Gabriel did
have Sam, he was going to ask Michael to set him free. Castiel knew Gabriel had
already asked once. But since he was dating Sam’s brother. Cas knew there was a
chance Michael might grant an exception, as a good faith gesture towards Dean’s
family. But Cas also knew that Michael could choose to do nothing.
Dean and Cas stayed silent after that. They didn’t try to actively make out
anymore. They fell asleep and Dean woke up to hear his father stager in from
his date. He listened to his dad flop down on the bed in the other room. Dean
carefully pulled Castiel’s arm off of him. Then he opened the drawer on the
nightstand.
Dean pulled out the box of postcards. He found one that said “Happy Birthday”
on it and decided that was fitting.
“Dean became a teenager today and I collected cans until I had enough money to
buy him a snack cake. I sat on him and sang the happy birthday song like they
do at school! I will miss Dean being a kid with me.”
That postcard made Dean feel like crap. He remembered that somehow, Sam would
always find a way to give him a snack cake and sing to him. Half the time, Dean
was certain that Sam stole the snack cake but he never asked. He always
gratefully accepted it and shared it with Sam. He would let Sam sing to him. He
would tease his brother slightly but he knew he would never tell be able to
tell Sam how much that meant to him.
Dean knew, he never did anything like that for Sam. He never once sang happy
birthday to his brother or even gave him a fifty cent cake. Dean knew that now,
he would never get that chance and he would never get to have his own birthday
tradition with Sam ever again. He had missed it in January. He was distracted
though because Cas bought him a pie and took him out for lunch. Cas had spent
more money on Dean on his birthday than Sam ever did, but somehow it meant less
to Dean than any one of his birthdays with Sam.
It made him feel like a dick because he knew that Sam would have probably liked
more for his birthday than a ruffling of his hair and a halfhearted happy
birthday. Dean slipped the postcard away and murmured, “I’m sorry, Sammy.”
***** Chapter 14 *****
Sam had been going to Pastor Jim’s church on Tuesday and Thursday mornings for
a few months now.  It was something that Pastor Jim was glad he did but it
broke his heart at the same time. After Dean got angry and hung up on him when
he tried to tell him, Pastor Jim decided to watch Sam and talk to Sam first.
Pastor Jim would have liked to reassure Sam that certain things wouldn’t
happen, that he was safe now, and that no matter what his family would love
him. However, he knew John Winchester and he knew reputations the Novaks had.
He knew he couldn’t promise anything. He wanted to take Sam away somewhere and
let him start over. He wanted Sam to be able to be the rebellious teenager that
pissed John Winchester off, but that Sam was not the boy he saw twice a week.
This Sam was nervous and weary around other people. He would take a step-back
from people he wasn’t familiar with. If anyone touched him without warning, Sam
would flinch. Pastor Jim did hug him every time they saw each other after he
asked for permission. He noticed that Sam didn’t flinch but there was a
passivity about it. It seemed to him like Sam was just accepting it.
Pastor Jim thought back to what Dean said about getting Sam’s clothes back that
were covered in blood. He didn’t know what was beneath Sam’s clothes. Until
today, Pastor Jim was watching some volunteers and Sam put up the fall
decorations around the church. He stood back to help eyeball a banner. Sam
lifted up his arms to hold the banner above his head and it caused his shirt to
ride up slightly. It revealed only about one inch of marred flesh. It was
healed so Pastor Jim knew it wasn’t recent but from what he could see there
wasn’t a single centimeter that didn’t carry a scar.
He knew John didn’t do it to Sam because Dean would have killed him for laying
a hand on Sam. Pastor Jim knew it was either a Novak or one of the guards that
tortured Sam. He wondered what Sam did to constitute that sort of violence and
he wondered if Sam would have to face that violence again. He knew if Dean ever
saw that on Sam, Dean might actually try to kill whoever did it. It did make
him question more, if he should tell John and Dean, Sam is alive for the time
being.
Pastor Jim was also worried about Sam’s sexuality. Sam had always talked
exclusively about girls. His head followed pretty girls before this. He knew
that Sam wanted to go to college, get married, and have a couple kids. Sam had
never indicated any interest in someone of his gender and now, Sam was having
that forced on him.
He knew Gabriel was being subtle with Sam but he could see the manipulation.
Gabriel was the only person who could protect Sam or so Sam was led to believe
that. Gabriel showed concern for Sam and Pastor Jim noticed Sam would not stop
or flinch away from Gabriel touching him. He never saw any touching that could
be deemed inappropriate, but it still made him wonder.
Pastor Jim also noticed that Sam didn’t dress or cut his hair like he did
before. Sam always wore simple slip on shoes, jeans and a plain t-shirt. His
hair was styled to be just above his shoulders. Pastor Jim didn’t know if this
was Sam’s choice or Gabriel’s choice. He decided to get some answers today.
After the decorations were up, Pastor Jim took Sam back to his office. He had
Sam take a seat and he watched the boy for a moment. Then he carefully said, “I
haven’t told your dad or Dean you’re alive. I tried and Dean got angry before I
could tell him. He told me that they got your clothes you were wearing that day
in the mail and they were covered in blood. He thinks you got beat to death. I
think it might help Dean to know you’re alive.”
Sam stared at Pastor Jim and tried to process what the pastor was saying. He
had wondered why he hadn’t seen or heard from his dad or Dean. He had assumed
that they rejected him because he submitted or maybe because at some point in
the future he was going to be asked to have a homosexual relationship. Sam
didn’t want them to know he was alive at first, but the selfish side of him
wanted to see them again.
Quietly Sam said, “I don’t want to talk about anytime I was beaten. I can
assure you though, Gabriel stopped it the two times it happened and Gabriel had
nothing to do with it.” He paused and chewed on his lip for a moment. He was
nervous when he asked, “How are my dad and Dean doing? I.. I miss them but I
don’t think they will love me anymore.”
Firmly Pastor Jim said, “Sam, your brother will love you no matter what. Same
with your dad. Dean is in college. He is studying mechanical engineering. He
has a boyfriend named Cas and they seem to click really well together.”
Sam got a confused look on his face and said in disbelief, “Dean has a
boyfriend?”
Pastor Jim leaned back in his chair and said, “Yes, Sam. It isn’t a big deal.
They are both consenting adults.”
Sam huffed out a breath and said under his breath, “It must be nice to be able
to consent to what happens to your body.”
Pastor Jim took a sharp breath and realized that Sam may have been lying about
not getting molested. He carefully asked, “What do you mean by that, Sam? Is
Gabriel…”
Sam cut him off with a sharp, “No, Gabriel isn’t raping me if that is what
you’re asking. He thinks I am too young.” He closed his eyes and took a few
breaths. He knew his eyes probably looked glassy when he opened them. Sam spoke
a little softer to Pastor Jim, “I just don’t have any say in anything. I have
to trim my nails a certain way, but I can only do that under Gabriel’s
supervision. I have absolutely no say in my hair style or what I wear. Gabriel
sets my clothes out for me every day and my hairstylist has never spoken to
me.”
Sam lowered his head and gave a defeated chuckle, “You know, the only reason I
got to keep my name was because he liked it. There are two other slaves in the
house. Do you know what he named them? Candy Apple and Lollipop.”
Pastor Jim raised an eyebrow and asked carefully, “Are Candy Apple and Lollipop
treated differently than you?”
Sam nodded his head yes and said, “Yeah, a lot different. I am treated better
than them. I really don’t want to end up like them. I haven’t spoken to either
of them since an incident with the guards. But they are just broken. I know I
am at least a little bit broken, but I don’t want to be like that. I think I
would rather let Gabriel fuck me than get thrown in with them.”
Pastor Jim carefully said, “You can’t possibly mean that, Sam.”
Sam crossed his arms across his chest and he snipped, “Well, I can either get
gang raped by the guards and forced to rape the other slaves or I can let
Gabriel have sex with me. One dick sounds a lot easier to manage than 20 and I
already know they won’t kill me.” Sam felt himself start to break down a
little, “You have no idea, how much I just want them to kill me but they won’t
and I don’t understand why.” Sam started to sob. He tried to cover his face
with his hands as he cried.
Pastor Jim got up and knelt down in front of Sam. He gently touched Sam on the
shoulder which earned him a flinch from Sam. He was quiet and soothing when he
spoke, “It’s okay, Sam. Everything is going to be okay.”
Sam leaned into Pastor Jim and sobbed. He felt rather pathetic at the moment.
He started babbling, “I..I don’t want to live. I don’t want this. Dean is going
to hate me because I stopped fighting it. I.. I let Gabriel do whatever he
wants. I hate who I am. I always screw up. I promised Dean I would be strong
without him and look at me! I can’t keep it together. Why would they ever want
me back if I live through this? I’ll just be a former slave who spread his legs
so he wouldn’t get beaten or passed around.”
Dean was standing in the doorway of Pastor Jim’s office with Cas. They were on
fall break from school and Dean was supposed to be showing Cas how to hunt. The
hunt Dean found landed them down south, so he decided to take Cas to meet one
of his old family friends. He never expected to see his brother, whom he
thought was dead, in Pastor Jim’s office having a breakdown. To top things off,
Cas was as white as a ghost.
Dean decided to handle one crisis at a time and that meant Sam took precedence
over Cas. He stepped into the room and was unsure of himself when he said a
quiet, “Sammy?”
Sam looked up and he immediately saw Castiel. He felt terror because he thought
Castiel was going to tell Gabriel how ungrateful he is. He didn’t want to think
about what would happen when Gabriel found out or what Castiel might do.
Castiel had never been nice to him and had always been a little standoffish
with him.
Sam immediately lowered his head and his gaze. He fell out of the chair and
onto his knees. He started begging Castiel, “Please Sir, I’m sorry. Please,
don’t tell Master, please Sir. I will please Master without complaint. I
promise, Sir.” Sam honestly had no idea what he was promising. He would have
promised the moon if he thought it would stop his impending beating.
Dean was confused and pissed. He wasn’t pissed at Sam. He was pissed at whoever
did this to him. He gruffly said, “The Hell?” Then he got down on the floor in
front of Sam. He cupped Sam’s face with his hands. He tried to sound calm but
his voice was strained. “Sammy, it’s me. It is your brother, Dean. Do you
remember who I am?” He got a shaky nod from Sam.
Dean brushed Sam’s hair out of his face and he could feel his hands getting wet
with Sam’s tears. Quietly Dean said, “Sammy, no one here is going to hurt you.
No one is going to tell whoever your Master is what you said. I promise.”
Sam shook his head no and said quietly, “Sir will.”
Dean gave Sam a confused look and said carefully, “Sammy, it is just me, Pastor
Jim, and my boyfriend. I don’t think Pastor Jim is going to rat you out and I
know I’m not…”
Castiel’s voice was firm from behind him. “Dean, your brother is talking about
me. However, I do not intend to tell Gabriel about this.”
Dean’s head shot around as he pulled Sam into a hug. He felt a surge of
protectiveness and anger. “What are you talking about, Cas?”
Castiel sighed, “I’m sorry, Dean. I haven’t been completely honest with you. My
true name is Castiel Novak. My brother, Gabriel, took Sam as a slave. I haven’t
said anything because I wasn’t sure Sam was your brother. The paperwork to find
out about a slave’s family is significant and it has been pending for months. I
found it unlikely but it appears I was wrong.”
Dean protectively held onto Sam as Sam trembled in his arms. He knew he was
going to have to hand Sam over soon, but he didn’t want too. Sharply Dean said,
“Have you beaten my brother, Castiel?”
Castiel frowned and said, “No, nor do I intend too. I have never beaten,
tortured, or killed anyone. I am not like my brothers. Why do you think I am
dating instead of doing what Gabriel is doing to Sam?” He paused and added, “I
don’t believe Gabriel has ever hit Sam. I cannot comment to the full nature of
their relationship, but I think it is Gabriel’s intention to respect Sam.”  
Dean glared at Castiel and said, “I do not want him to have to go back there.”
Cas nodded and said calmly, “I understand. I will call Gabriel and see what I
can work out. Neither one of us have the power to free Sam, but I may be able
to give you time.”
++
In the end, Castiel wasn’t able to accomplish much. Gabriel wanted Sam to come
home because he was worried. After talking to his brother, he was starting to
wonder who was more protective of Sam. Both Dean and Gabriel seemed highly
protective of Sam and to Castiel they both seemed to want to exercise some
level of control over Sam. Cas had a feeling this visit wasn’t going to go well
and he knew he would have to talk to Dean later.
Cas drove Dean’s car to Gabriel’s mansion. It was mostly quiet except for Sam’s
sniffling in Dean’s arms and Dean’s whispered reassurances. Castiel couldn’t
make out what Dean was saying and he knew that it wasn’t any of his business.
Gabriel was waiting for them inside when they arrived and Castiel stepped back
to watch. Dean held Sam firmly behind him and when Sam saw Gabriel, Sam started
to break down again. Castiel watched Gabriel take a step back in the foyer away
from Sam and Dean.
It was Sam, who spoke first. “Master, I’m sorry…”
Gabriel put up a hand and calmly said, “Sam, you’re not in trouble.”
Sam lowered his head and got a confused look on his face. Gabriel was concerned
about Sam. He hadn’t seen Sam this upset in months. Then he heard Sam stammer
out, “But you don’t know what I said.”
Gabriel rolled his eyes and maintained his calm voice, “Sam, you’ve never
gotten in trouble for speaking your mind. Now, why don’t you go upstairs to our
room and shower to relax a little bit? I laid out some clean clothes for you. I
will come get you after I’ve had a chance to talk to Castiel and your brother,
Dean. Don’t worry, you will get to see Dean again today and in the future. ”
Gabriel put a reassuring smile on his face and said, “Now, go.”
Dean interjected, “You share a room?” Dean felt Sam remove himself from his
grasp. Then he helplessly watched as Sam retreated behind the closed doors at
the top of the stair case.
++
Sam leaned himself up against the door to the bedroom and took a few deep
breaths. He repeated to himself multiple times that Gabriel wasn’t mad. Then
after a few moments he set about doing what Gabriel asked of him. Sam started a
warm shower and started to wash himself carefully.
Sam started to think about things as the water hit his back and face. The
shower was calming him. Sometimes, Sam wondered how Gabriel knew how to calm
him down. More than that, he started to wonder what would happen if Dean was
able to take him home today. He would go back to being hungry and essentially
homeless. Sam wondered if he would end up whoring himself so they could go on a
hunt.
He thought about how someday, he wanted a wife, a couple of kids, and an apple
pie life. But his opinion on that has been changing. He was starting to like
Gabriel and he got aroused when Gabriel touched him. Sam knew Gabriel never
touched him in a sexual way, but he thought there was an attraction there. Sam
wondered if he would be giving up a chance to be happy with Gabriel by walking
away now, if he could walk away now.
Sam didn’t know if he wanted to continue to live under constant threat of
getting beaten or raped by the guards. He knew he could definitely live without
that. Sam was confused and he felt like he was trapped in between two very
protective men that each wanted different things from him. He didn’t know what
to do. He didn’t know whether to listen to Gabriel because he was his Master or
Dean because he was his brother that would die for him. Survival told Sam to
listen to Gabriel and commonsense told Sam to listen to Dean.
Sam mechanically finished his shower. He put on lotion like he was supposed to
and dried his hair like Gabriel preferred. Then he got dressed. Sam threw his
dirty clothes in the hamper. He walked out of their bedroom and to the end of
the hall. He leaned his head against the door to see if he could hear anything,
but of course he couldn’t.
He sighed and went back into the bedroom. Sam sat down on the edge of the bed
and was nervous. He pulled out a blank postcard. This one had gummy bears on
it. Sam flipped it over and decided to think of the positive.
“I didn’t disappoint Gabriel today and I got to see Dean for the first time
since I was taken. I will miss letting Dean think I was strong.”
Sam slipped the postcard in the drawer. Then he walked out of the bedroom and
into the study. He took a seat by the window, so he could watch the
interactions of the guards and other slaves. Everyone seemed to be in the yard
and Sam thought Gabriel must have cleared the house for his conversation with
Dean. Sam wondered if he would ever be able to start up conversations on his
own again. He didn’t seem to be able to do that with his own brother anymore.
Sam wondered if maybe being a slave was all he was good for. 
***** Chapter 15 *****
Dean wasn’t sure where to start with how much he hated Gabriel Novak. He knew
he should have at least a little bit of appreciation somewhere inside of him
because Sam was alive because of Gabriel. However, Dean couldn’t bring himself
to feel that. Dean had never seen Sam, his Sam, that messed up and he couldn’t
help but wonder what Sam was doing with Pastor Jim. The whole situation pissed
Dean off to no end.
So now, he was standing in the foyer of the largest house Dean had ever been
in, in his life, glaring at Gabriel Novak. The man had managed to get complete
compliance from Sam without any backtalk or any real hesitation. Dean couldn’t
manage to get Sam to go to school in the morning without complaining and the
kid was a nerd. He wondered if Sammy was still a nerd or if he was just this
crying scared boy one minute and compliant slave the next.
Dean wasn’t sure how long the silence lasted. It was Gabriel who broke the ice.
His voice was calm. It was a practiced calm in Dean’s opinion. “Dean, I am not
hurting your brother.”
Dean narrowed his eyes on Gabriel. He harshly said, “You’re sharing a room with
a child. You do realize that Sam is a child right? That you’re molesting a
child.”
Gabriel sighed and said in the same calm tone, “I am not molesting your brother
either. I don’t touch him like that. It was his choice to sleep in my room with
me. I am not going to lie to you, Dean, about anything. I have no reason to lie
to you. Once Sam gets older, I would like a sexual relationship with him.
However, he doesn’t feel he can consent because he is a slave. He doesn’t feel
that he has the rights to his own body to make that choice, so nothing will
happen until either he feels differently about that or he is free.”
Dean quirked an eyebrow. He thought about telling Gabriel that Sam is straight
but he thought better of it. Sam was alive by some miracle and he didn’t want
to say something to get Sam killed. Dean knew he could fix Sam. It didn’t
matter to him if he got Sam back today or whenever Sam turned 21. He was going
to make Sam okay again. He was going to help his baby brother get the life back
that was taken from him.
Dean glanced at Cas or Castiel, whatever the hell his name actually was. Cas
was pale and looked worried and clearly had no intent of saying anything. He
took a couple deep breaths and decided he could chew Cas out later. Dean spoke
with agitation, “Okay, so you’re not raping my brother. I find that to be a
good thing, if it is true. But what exactly do you do in bed together?”
Gabriel was quiet for a moment. He knew he was very close to getting punched by
Dean and he wasn’t going to stop Dean if he chose to do that. However, for
Sam’s sake he wanted to avoid that. He calmly said, “Sleep mostly. We talk
sometimes. I rub his back before he goes to sleep most nights and sometimes, he
lets me hold him.”
Dean spat out to Gabriel, “Lets you? I am pretty sure given the state he is in,
he would let you do anything you want.”
Gabriel smiled and laughed slightly, “I can assure you that is not the case.”
Gabriel got a look of disbelief from Dean. He frowned and said, “Sam had told
me no before and I have always respected him when he made that choice. I will
admit it doesn’t happen often but it has happened.”
Dean nodded but wasn’t quite convinced, “What does Sam do here, anyways?”
Gabriel shrugged and said calmly, “He doesn’t come downstairs except to eat and
cook with me. He is upstairs, where he is now, most of the day. Sam has a tutor
that is helping him complete high school. As you noticed, Sam works at church
twice a week. I am afraid that here Sam only socializes with me, so he was
beginning to have issues because of the isolation. Working at the church puts
him in contact with other people and I think it has been helping him.”
Dean shook his head and said, “So you keep him locked up most of the time?”
Gabriel gave a small smile and said, “Dean, I used to let him come down here
when I wasn’t home so he could interact with the other slaves and help out more
around the house. I wanted him to have something to do. The guards were not
kind to him. I will spare you from the details of what happened, but I will
tell you that Michael ordered the execution of all of my guards.” He paused
when he saw Dean’s eyes go wide with the implications of what that could mean.
He continued gently, “The guards I have now have never hurt your brother or my
two other slaves.”
Castiel hesitantly spoke, “Gabriel, have you spoken to Michael about this? It
is a bizarre circumstance.”
Gabriel nodded and walked into the living room. Castiel and Dean followed.
Gabriel poured himself a drink and offered one to both Dean and Castiel. Dean
and Cas sat down on the sofa across from Gabriel. Gabe took a slow drink from
his glass and said sadly, “I did and Michael is not pleased. He told me that he
is fine with Dean and Sam’s father visiting with Castiel. He had some choice
things to say about you dating, Cas.”
Dean downed his drink and said angrily, “Why can’t you just let Sammy go?”
Gabriel sighed and said in the same sad tone, “That is what I asked for today
because Castiel is dating you. Michael told me that Sam can either remain my
slave or he can be returned to the capital and Michael or Lucifer will deal
with him.”
Dean shook his head and asked, “What does it mean to deal with him?”
Castiel touched Dean lightly on his thigh and whispered, “It means they intend
to kill him. I think it is best for Sam to stay here. I can take you to see Sam
as often as you like.”
Dean put his hands on his face and groaned. He leaned back and looked at the
ceiling for a moment. He hated this. He carefully said, “Can I call him?”
Gabriel nodded and said, “Of course, I have a private line in the study
upstairs. I will give you the number. You can call Sam anytime.”
Dean wanted to punch Gabriel or kill him, but since Gabriel was literally the
only person stopping his brother from getting killed. He did nothing. Instead
Dean asked, “Can I go talk to my brother in private?”
Gabriel nodded in agreement and said calmly, “He should be done showering now.
He will either be in our bedroom or the study. The door should be open to
either.” He paused and said, “Castiel and I will wait down here while you talk
to Sam. Please take as long as you need. After you’re done talking, we can get
some lunch. It is past time for Sam to eat.”
Dean shook his head and said incredulously, “You babysit when he eats?”
Gabriel sighed, “Dean, I would rather not see Sam starve to death so yes. He
was malnourished when I got him. He is doing much better now. He has a strange
relationship with food, but I think that is a conversation for another time.”
Dean nodded and left the room. He walked up the stairs and opened the door.
The upstairs was not as fancy as the downstairs, Dean noticed. The walls were
painted the same color. The hallway was long with dark oak doors. Most of the
doors were open. The first door Dean peeked into was an empty bedroom. It
looked small and unlived in. He suspected it was a guest bedroom. He passed a
number of bedrooms and a workout room.
Then Dean came to the study which was the second to last door. The only other
door was to what Dean assumed as the master bedroom. He looked in the study and
saw Sam staring blankly out the window. He leaned on the doorframe and watched
his brother. It was clear to Dean that this was something Sam spent a fair
amount of his time doing.
Dean couldn’t help but feel bad for Sam. The room was silent and Dean
understood why Sam felt isolated and probably very alone. He wished he could
trade places with Sam, but he couldn’t. Dean walked quietly into the room and
he was surprised Sam didn’t acknowledge him. He walked up to Sam and put a hand
on his shoulder.
Sam was startled by the touch. He jumped from where he was sitting and looked
around to see who was there with fearful eyes. He relaxed when he saw it was
Dean. He looked around and saw that Dean was alone. Sam quietly asked, “Where
is Gabriel?”
Dean took a seat next to Sam. He kept his voice soft and gentle when he spoke,
“Downstairs, I asked Gabriel to let me talk to you alone.” He paused and waited
for Sam to meet his eyes. “Gabriel talked to Michael and I can come see you
anytime with Castiel and I can call you. I promise Sammy, I’ll call you every
day and I will visit as often as I can.”
Sam nodded and chewed on his lip for a moment. He tentatively asked, “How long
will you be staying?”
Dean shrugged and said sadly, “Until Castiel drags me away.”
Sam frowned and lifted a hand. He gently touched Dean’s face then he pulled his
hand away. He said softly, “Pastor Jim said you’re in college. You have class
to get back to at some point.”
Dean shook his head and said quietly, “Sammy, that doesn’t matter to me.”
Sam looked back out the window again and replied distantly, “It should. You’re
going to have to support me when I am finally able to be free. I want you to
finish college, Dean. You can consider it my dying wish if you have too.”
Dean gave Sam a small smile and said, “Okay Sammy, I can do that for you.” He
paused, “How are you doing?”
Sam shrugged and said quietly, “Okay, I guess. Gabriel is pretty protective of
me and he treats me well for a slave.”
Dean nodded and said bluntly, “So he hits you?”
Sam shook his had no and said, “He’s never hit me. He doesn’t give me a lot of
choices and sometimes he gives me no choice.”
Dean nodded again because that seemed like a safe gesture. He was curious as to
how much freedom Sam had, “What sort of choices does he make for you?”
Sam shrugged and looked around as he thought. There were a lot of things. He
decided to go with the ones least likely to piss Dean off. “Umm, Normal stuff I
guess. I have to do my schoolwork, eat, clean myself, and sleep at a certain
times. I have to keep the upstairs clean and I have a schedule for that.”
Dean latched onto Sam’s statement about cleaning himself. He wondered if
Gabriel watched Sam shower or did sick things to Sam in the shower. Against his
better judgment he asked, “So does Gabriel supervise your showering or inspect
you to make sure you did it right?”
Sam smiled but it was fake. He quietly said, “Gabriel has never seen me naked.
But he does have a pretty specific idea on how he wants my body kept. I would
do things differently if I had a choice, but I don’t. It’s not a big deal
though. I’m used to it.”
Dean was quiet for a moment. He thoughtfully said, “I know that’s not true,
Sam. You were having a breakdown about that with Pastor Jim.”
Sam bit down on his lip for a moment. Then he said, “You’re right. I don’t see
myself when I look in the mirror anymore.” Sam shrugged and added, “I think
this is a chick flick moment, Dean.”
Dean laughed lightly and said, “I don’t care, Sammy. So Gabriel said, you like
backrubs?”
Sam shook his head no and he knew this was going to piss Dean off. He could
feel overprotective brother before the words even fell out of his mouth. “No,
not really. I don’t have a choice in that. I got whipped pretty badly by a
guard about a year ago. Gabriel rubs my back to keep the scar tissue from
getting tough.”
Before Dean could ask. Sam turned around and lifted up his shirt to show Dean.
He heard Dean suck in a breath and said breathlessly, “Sammy.. my god.” Sam
felt Dean’s tentative fingers on his back. It was different that Gabriel
touching him there. Sam pulled his shirt back down and turned back around. Dean
was nervous when he asked, “What did you do to deserve that?”
Sam gave Dean his puppy dog eyes and said quietly, “Nothing, Gabriel killed the
guard who did it.”
Dean gave Sam an impressed look and said, “I can respect that.” He paused and
added, “We should go down and get lunch. Gabriel said it is passed time for you
to eat.”
Sam frowned at Dean and said quietly, “Oh okay, I can’t go down there without
Gabriel. I.. ah.. I don’t want to get in trouble.”
Dean closed his eyes and tried to say calmly, “Sammy, Gabriel is the one that
asked me to have you come down. I am sure it will be fine.”
Sam shook his head no and spoke like a frightened child, “I’m sorry, Dean. It’s
just.. I just.. I can’t.. I’m sorry.” Started to cry again and he felt Dean
wrap his arms around him. Dean didn’t say a word. He just let Sam cry it out.
++
Dean didn’t know how he felt about Gabriel somehow managing to calm Sam down
easily. He didn’t like it and he decided to put off punching Gabriel until
Sammy turned 21. Then he was going to punch Gabriel.
If Dean had to describe lunch, it would be awkward. Sam called Gabriel, Master
and he called Castiel and himself, Sir. It lasted for about an hour until Dean
cracked and asked for it to stop. Sam didn’t say anything to his request. It
was Gabriel, who gave Sam permission to call them by name. That bothered Dean
to because Sammy should be listening to him, not Gabriel.
By the end of the day, Dean felt like a jealous girl. He could feel the
jealously seeping through his veins. On some level, he knew it was stupid.
Gabriel could either just be the guy that keeps Sam alive until he’s 21 or the
guy Sam chooses to marry. Dean found the latter unlikely, but he had a feeling
Gabriel could manipulate Sam into going through with it.
Dean and Castiel were staying at Gabriel’s mansion that night. They had the end
bedroom upstairs. Dean could tell by the way the bed was made that Sam was the
one who made it. It was done with military precision. Everything was spotless
and Dean couldn’t even find a speck of dust. It was disturbing to Dean.
Dean was sitting on the edge of the bed and he knew Castiel was watching him.
He heard Cas calmly say, “Dean, we need to talk.”
Dean glanced up at his boyfriend or whatever he was now and said in a defeated
tone, “Cas, I can’t handle much more today.”
Cas nodded and sat down next to Dean. He tilted his head and looked at Dean
critically for a moment. He carefully said, “I understand. I understand if
you’re angry with me but I want you to know. I don’t think Gabriel lied to you
today. I think the formality at which Sam addressed us bothered you, but Sam
was trained to respond that way.”
Dean chuckled and shook his head, “Trained? That’s not helping me feel better.”
Castiel started to lightly rub Dean’s back and said solemnly, “I know. I’ve
been around slaves my whole life. My mother was a slave. I never liked the way
they were treated. For what it is worth, Sam is treated better than any slave I
have ever seen. He is being treated better than Lilith and Eve, when they were
slaves.”
Dean glanced up at Castiel and said sharply, “Lilith and Eve are sadistic
bitches.”
Castiel smiled and said sadly, “I know. But I don’t think Sam is going to turn
out like them.”
Dean shook his head and said bluntly, “No, he is going to be a twitchy PTSD
survivor on medication for the rest of his life. Gabriel is already drugging
him. I saw it.”
Castiel nodded and said carefully, “I can find out what he is giving Sam if
that would help. I can’t stop Gabriel from giving Sam medication, but it may
help to understand his intentions.”
Dean nodded and said quietly, “Yeah that would be good.”
Dean pulled Sam’s box of postcards out from his duffel bag. He sat it on his
lap and opened it gingerly. He thought about giving it back to Sam since Sam is
alive, but Dean decided to keep it. The Sam who wrote these cards was buried
somewhere in the Sam, Dean met today. He also didn’t know if Gabriel would let
Sam keep them or destroy them. At least this way, Dean thought, he could keep
them safe for Sam.
Castiel looked at the box with curiosity and asked, “What is that?’
Dean smiled, “Postcards. Sammy would steal them and write a little blurb about
whatever was going in his life.” Dean pulled a postcard out at random. This one
had an old cracked bell on the front. Dean remembered where this was. Sam was
11 and they ended up squatting most haunted town. It was abandoned because of
the ghosts. Sam was disappointed because they didn’t see a single angry spirit.
Dean grinned and flipped the card over to read what Sam wrote.
“It is awesome to be able to stay somewhere that hunters like my dad and Dean
took care of all the spirits. I will miss being able to tell the lady at the
tourism center that the area isn’t haunted anymore.”
Dean frowned and tucked the card away.  He decided that someday; he would get
to take Sam on a salt and burn again. Then maybe he could Sam’s hero again.
 
 
***** Chapter 16 *****
Sam wasn’t sure how he felt about having Dean and his dad back in his life. He
knew they weren’t fully back in his life. He knew Gabriel managed his
relationship with them carefully and he knew Gabriel didn’t care for his
father. He saw Dean about once a month, but he had only seen his dad once and
that visit was brief.
Gabriel had sent Sam upstairs to their room after John made a comment about how
Sam needed a haircut because he looked like a girl. Sam didn’t want to tell
John it wasn’t his choice and it made him shake in fear. He didn’t want to be
rejected by his own father and he knew his father had hit him for correction in
the past. Sam never saw that rejection though and John didn’t hit him, because
Gabriel had sent him away. He didn’t even get to say goodbye to his father. He
always got to say goodbye to Dean.
Sam knew Gabriel wanted to know what he talked about with Dean. He liked to
know the details and sometimes the exact wording. Sam tried to remember as best
he could, but sometimes if Dean said something odd he would write it down to
tell Gabriel. Sam knew Dean didn’t like Gabriel, but he never told Gabriel
that. He liked getting to see his brother.
He still got the occasional phone call from his father when Gabriel was
present, but his father’s questions were short and the tone of the conversation
was always cold. Sam just wished he could know if his father still loved him,
but he couldn’t bring himself to ask. He didn’t want to face that rejection. So
he took what he could and smiled at the words spoken between them.
Sam’s daily phone call from Dean and the occasional phone call from his father
broke up his quiet existence. He liked the social contacts he had now. He liked
helping Pastor Jim out at the church and the volunteers who stopped by from
time to time because they never treated him like a slave. Sam knew that they
knew he was a slave. His collar made that much clear. He enjoyed those outings
because he felt like a real person then.
He was sixteen now and he had hit his growth spurt. Sam had shot up to over six
feet tall. He knew he was lanky but he didn’t mind. Gabriel never said anything
negative about it and since Gabriel owned his body that was all that really
mattered. Sam wasn’t sure what to do about sex. He was a teenager and horny.
Sam was afraid to jerk off in the shower or when Gabriel wasn’t home because he
thought Gabriel would know.
Sam still did not want to have sex with Gabriel. He didn’t think he would be
opposed to Gabriel touching him like that, but he didn’t want anything put up
his ass. That just sounded painful and unpleasant to him and he wasn’t sure
about putting anything in his mouth. Sam had developed a sexual fascination for
Gabriel. He didn’t know if he was gay or if it was just a product of not being
around other people his own age. Sam wasn’t sure if he wanted to act on it. As
much as Sam hated to admit to himself, he would be more comfortable with
Gabriel taking the lead on that.
He also wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do in bed. The last thing Sam
wanted was for Gabriel to have waited all this time for him, only to find out
he is bad in bed. Sam had only had one kiss in his life and that was with a
girl. It had never gone further than that so to say Sam was sexually
inexperienced was the understatement of the year. He also was worried that his
relationship with Gabriel would change if they started doing things sexually.
Sam still didn’t understand how love and sex could co-exist.
Sam was so lost in his thoughts he didn’t hear Gabriel enter the study where he
was sitting by the window. He heard Gabriel clear his throat and Sam turned his
head to smile at him.
Gabriel knew Sam was tense and he suspected it was hormones. He was hesitant to
approach the subject with Sam because he didn’t want to seem like a pervert. He
thought about calling Dean and asking him to talk to Sam about it. But Gabriel
suspected this had to do with Sam’s warped beliefs on what he could and could
not do with his own body. Sam was right that he didn’t let him have much
freedom of choice with his body. Gabriel knew he took some latitude there but
he liked to make Sam look more appealing to him and it kept Michael off his
back in what he thought was a subtle way.
Gabriel was however pro-masturbation so Gabriel did what any good person would
do. He bought a couple gay porn magazines for Sam and a bottle of lubricant. He
knew he should have bought a magazine with girls just in case Sam wanted to
look at ladies but he wanted to keep Sam’s focus on men. It was terribly
selfish of him and he was sure Castiel, who had become increasingly defensive
of Sam, would have something negative to say about it.
Gabriel sat the bag of supplies between him and Sam. He calmly asked, “Sam,
have you been touching yourself?”
Sam wasn’t sure what the correct answer to that question was. He was a little
frightened when he replied, “No, Gabriel. I.. I wouldn’t do that.”
Gabriel sighed and said calmly, “Sam, it’s okay to touch yourself. Just don’t
whip it out in public.” He grinned at Sam, but Sam had just lowered his gaze
and nodded. Gabriel reached out a hand and tilted up Sam’s head. He spoke
clearly and precisely, “I bought you some lube and magazines for you to do your
thing with. I assume you know how to pleasure yourself so I won’t go into it.
You’re free to do this whenever you wish.”
Sam was silent because he wasn’t sure what to say for certain. He knew he had
an important piece of information for Gabriel and he knew he had to share no
matter how humiliating it was. “I.. um.. I’ve never.. you know.” Sam gestured
towards his cock and hoped Gabriel wouldn’t make him spell it out. “I.. ah.. I
wasn’t sure if you want to be the one to take that from me.”
Gabriel studied Sam’s face carefully. He wanted to be sure he wasn’t
misunderstanding Sam. He suspected that Sam wanted him to take the lead on
this, but he wouldn’t. Gabriel knew that taking the lead without getting Sam’s
full consent could hurt Sam deeply. He tried to keep his tone as neutral as
possible, “Sam, it isn’t for me to take. If you want to give that to me, you
may. But I would never just take anything like that from you.”
Sam wasn’t sure. On one hand, jacking off in the bathroom like any normal
teenager sounded appealing. He liked feeling like everyone else. On the other
hand, Sam thought his master should have this. Gabriel had given him everything
so Sam thought that maybe he should give him this. He just didn’t want things
to change. Quietly he said, “If we start to do things together, will it change
the way you treat me?”
Gabriel put a reassuring hand on top of Sam’s and said earnestly, “Of course
not, Sam. I know you have been exposed to a lot of violence regarding sex and I
want to assure you it won’t be like that with me.”
Sam nodded and chewed on his lip for a moment. He closed his eyes and decided
to just go with it. He whispered out, “I want to give it to you… But I am not
sure what to do.”
Gabriel was quiet for a moment. He wanted to make sure Sam was okay with
everything. He firmly said, “I would like that. We are going to take things
slow and if at any time you feel uncomfortable or want me to stop, just say the
word. I won’t be mad, I promise.” Gabriel waited for Sam to nod in acceptance
to the terms. Then he said, “Let’s go to the bedroom and get started.”
++
Sam was somewhere between excited and absolutely terrified when he walked into
the bedroom. He had no idea if that was normal or not. He stood awkwardly near
his side of the bed waiting and hoping Gabriel would tell him what to do. He
watched Gabriel sit up on his side of the bed against the headboard. Gabriel
was fully dressed in his day clothes.
Gabriel assessed Sam for a moment. Then he said calmly, “I want you to undress,
Sam. Are you okay with taking your clothes off in front of me?”
Sam felt a shiver go through his body and he couldn’t say if it was fear or
anticipation. Judging by the pressure in his groin, he thought it was
anticipation. Sam said a shaky, “Yes Gabriel.” Then he started to remove his
clothes. He pulled his shirt off first. Then his socks and shoes followed by
his jeans. He paused when he got to his boxers. Sam looked up at Gabriel for
reassurance and saw Gabriel smiling at him. That was enough to cause Sam to be
able to go through with it and take off his boxers.
Gabriel hummed his approval and praised, “I see, you’ve been keeping up your
hygiene routine. It is nice not to see any body hair on you. I like to see your
smooth skin.” He watched Sam blush and he noticed Sam was starting to get hard.
Gabriel licked his lips and said calmly, “Come here.”
Sam stalled for a moment. He felt rather exposed and he could literally hear
his heart beating in his chest. He wondered if that was normal for the
situation or if this was his body’s way of telling him this situation was
pretty far from normal. Sam wondered if he should have talked to Dean about
this first. He didn’t because he was fairly certain he didn’t need to give Dean
another reason to secretly hate Gabriel.
Slowly, Sam found his feet could move and he sat down on the bed. He took a
deep breath and carefully pulled his legs up on the bed. There was a good 2
feet between him and Gabriel and he had no idea what he was supposed to do now.
Gabriel could tell Sam was nervous. He already decided they weren’t going to do
much, but he knew even just going this far was a lot for Sam. He held out his
arms and said calmly, “If you feel comfortable, I want you to come here.”
Sam thought the idea of being wrapped up in Gabriel’s arms sounded pretty
appealing right now. It was safe there. He scooted over on the bed so his back
was laying up against Gabriel’s chest. It felt different to be naked against
Gabriel but it felt right somehow. Sam felt Gabriel wrap his arms around is
torso leaving is arms free. He leaned his head in between Gabriel’s neck and
shoulder. Sam breathed in Gabriel’s familiar sent of candy and bath soap. It
relaxed him.
Once Sam was relaxed, Gabriel unhooked one of his arms from Sam. He opened the
drawer on the nightstand and pulled out a bottle of lube. He sat it down behind
him and he kissed Sam on the temple. Gabriel knew it wasn’t a real romantic
kiss, but it was the first time he had ever kissed Sam. He wanted to be able to
kiss Sam on the lips and all over his body, but he knew he would have to take
his time.
Gabriel quietly asked, “Is it okay, if I touch you?” Sam nodded and nervously
bit down on his lip. Gabriel gave Sam another kiss on the side of his head and
said gently, “You have to tell me, Sam.”
Sam’s voice was a little shaky when he said, “Yes.. I want you to touch me.”
Gabriel nodded and asked firmly, “And you will tell me to stop if you want
too?”
Sam nodded his head and said, “Yes, I can tell you to stop.”
Gabriel picked up the bottle of lube and squeezed some on the fingers of his
right hand. He decided to clearly state his intention to Sam. This way, Sam
would have a chance to back out. Gabriel was actually hoping Sam would back out
or tell him no, just so Sam would know it was okay to do that. However, Gabriel
wasn’t going to push him just to get Sam to ask for him to stop. Clearly and
calmly Gabriel said, “Sam, I am going to touch your penis. I want to stroke it
until you have an orgasm. If at any time, this becomes uncomfortable or you
don’t like it, you have to tell me.”
Sam nodded and his breath hitched. He closed his eyes and realized he was
really going to do this. He felt Gabriel’s warm hand move down to his dick and
Sam held his breath. It felt sort of nice, he thought. Sam could feel himself
getting harder and the touch caused a tingly feeling throughout his groin. Sam
reached up and grabbed hold of Gabriel’s arm that was still holding him. He
felt himself bite back a moan. He wasn’t sure if noises like that were normal.
Eventually, Gabriel started to stroke faster and Sam felt is balls start to get
tight. It was uncomfortable and foreign to him. He didn’t like the tightness
but he didn’t want Gabriel to stop either. The tingly sensation had spread by
this point through his groin, belly, and chest. Still, he knew Gabriel told him
to tell him to stop if he got uncomfortable. Breathlessly Sam said, “Gabriel
stop.”
Immediately Gabriel stopped and moved his hand a way from Sam’s penis. He was
painfully hard himself and he could tell Sam was close. Gabriel knew that
stopping now would be painful for Sam and if Sam did finish it tonight, he
would have a stronger orgasm. He waited for a few moments before he said
anything. He wanted to give Sam a chance to think. “Are you okay, Sam?”
Sam shakily nodded and said, “It felt tight down there.. I.. It was
uncomfortable so I told you to stop like you asked me too.”
Gabriel nodded and chose his words carefully, “You were getting close, Sam. The
tightness in your balls and the feeling of them drawing up means that you were
about to have a climax. Once you climax, the tightness should go away.” Sam
nodded in understanding and Gabriel added, “But you don’t have to worry about
that tonight. You did well.”
Sam grimaced and was embarrassed, “My.. It hurts down there now.”
Gabriel sucked in a breath because he didn’t want to force anything on Sam.
Carefully he said, “If you or I start to stroke it again and complete the
process. It will feel better. Do you want me to leave you to finish it by
yourself?” Gabriel wanted to give Sam every out in the world, not only because
he didn’t want to force himself on Sam. He also didn’t want to deal with the
wrath of Dean Winchester, who Gabriel still thought might beat the life of him
one day.
Sam was uncomfortable and somewhat in pain. It wasn’t the worst pain he had
ever felt, but he was pretty sure his view of pain was skewed slightly. He knew
he didn’t want Gabriel to leave him alone for this and he knew that probably
made him pathetic. Sam decided it was probably best to believe Gabriel that the
pain and tightness would go away if he finished this. He had no idea at what
point Gabriel giving him a hand job turned into something of a mental quest. 
Quietly Sam said, “Don’t go.”
Gabriel nodded but didn’t make a move to do anything. He wasn’t clear if Sam
wanted him to do something or just hang out for moral support. He was fine with
either. Carefully and without judgment Gabriel asked, “Do you want the lube,
Sam?”
Sam shook his head no and said stammered out, “Can you finish it?”
Gabriel gave a small snort but didn’t laugh. He kissed Sam on the side of his
head again. Then he said calmly, “Yes Sam, but remember you can tell me to
stop.” With that Gabriel remoistened his right hand with lube and he reached
down to start stroking Sam’s hard penis. Sam bucked up his hips with the touch
and it made Gabriel smile. He stroked gently and slowly for a few minutes.
Gabriel wanted to build this up nicely for Sam. When Sam was sweating and
shaking in his arms. He sped up the pace.
Sam’s entire body was tingling and Gabriel’s clothed arm across his chest that
was holding him in place, just made the experience so much better. He liked the
feeling of the fabric moving across his skin. He felt the tightness increase
and he felt like he had to do something. Sam wasn’t entirely sure what that
was, but he knew he didn’t want Gabriel to stop. He felt Gabriel pick up the
pace which had him craving something unknown to him.
Then Sam felt his body go ridged and convulse. He felt something squirting out
of his penis and for a moment he thought he pissed himself. Sam felt the
tightness go away as Gabriel’s stroking slowed. When he stopped trembling,
Gabriel moved his hand away. Sam opened his eyes to see white semen on his
belly and on Gabriel’s hand. He was embarrassed by this. He whispered out,
“Sorry.”
Gabriel gave Sam a confused look and asked, “What are you sorry for? You’ve
done nothing wrong.”
Sam shrugged as he buried his head in the space between Gabriel’s neck and
shoulder. He could feel Gabriel wiping off his hand with a tissue. Then he felt
Gabriel wipe down his stomach. Ashamed Sam said, “I made a mess.”
Gabriel laughed and said happily, “That was the point, Sam. Do you feel okay?”
Sam nodded lazily and said quietly, “Yeah, I feel really relaxed and tired.”
Gabriel grinned and said, “Okay, I am going to get up to take care of myself
because you turned me on. I’ll be back in five minutes tops and we can take a
nap. How does that sound?”
Sam opened his eyes and wondered if he should help Gabriel with that. He also
wondered if Gabriel was going to pull out pajamas for him to wear while they
napped. He quietly said, “I can.. um.. help you if you want.”
Gabriel was quiet for a moment. He decided that Sam could watch. He didn’t want
Sam to stroke him because he thought Sam might freak out with the body fluids.
Carefully Gabriel said, “You can watch.” Gabriel leaned up and shimmed out of
his clothes. Then he pulled Sam back down next to him so Sam was curled up
against his side. He felt Sam’s arm across his chest and hoped nothing hit Sam
when he climaxed.
Gabriel started to stroke himself quickly. He was worked up from watching Sam.
It was probably one of the hottest things he ever got to do and he knew that
was in large part due to Sam’s innocence about the whole thing. It didn’t take
long before he was climaxing and groaning, “Sam,” as he did. When he was coming
down from his orgasm, Gabriel leaned over and gave Sam a gentle kiss on the
lips. Sam parted his lips tenderly and it felt right to Gabriel. Gabriel
cleaned himself up and pulled them both under the covers to rest for a bit.
++
Sam fell asleep with Gabriel holding onto him. It felt weird when he woke
because he realized he was naked and in bed with Gabriel, who was also naked.
He was glad he had the blankets to cover himself because he felt a little self-
conscious of his body.
Sam rolled over out of Gabriel’s grasp. He sat up on the bed and made sure his
privates stayed covered. He pulled out a blank postcard from his drawer. This
one candy sticks on the front of it. He snorted a laugh with how fitting that
seemed. Sam flipped it over and wrote.
“I had my first orgasm today and it was amazing. I will miss the feeling of
being able to do this for the first time, but it made me trust Gabriel more.”
Sam smiled at the card and then he slipped it into the drawer. He laid back
down on the bed and curled up with his master. For the first time, Sam thought
with certainty that maybe being a slave wasn’t so bad.
***** Chapter 17 *****
Dean wanted to bang his head against the wall for a variety of reasons, none of
which were terribly productive. The primary reason being his dad. Dean had just
gotten back from visiting Sammy. It was an awkward visit as per usual. It was
either tolerate the awkwardness or not see his brother, so Dean just dealt with
the awkwardness and kept his mouth shut.
Dean walked into the apartment and John was drinking. He sighed and tossed his
keys on the counter. He shrugged off his jacket and asked his dad carefully,
“How many have you had to drink tonight?”
John looked up at Dean with blurry eyes. He couldn’t stand the sight of son
much these days. His son was dating a Novak, Castiel Novak, of all people. He
was fine with Dean being gay, bisexual, or whatever the hell his son called it.
He was not okay with him dating an asshole from an asshole family. John slurred
out, “What is it to you?”
Dean sighed and took the beer from his father. He calmly said, “I am going to
take that to mean, you’ve had too many.” He paused and watched John’s face
contort into anger. Dean wondered briefly if John was going to hit him, but
then he saw his father deflate. “You should go to bed and sleep this off.”
John leaned back and looked at the blurry ceiling. He knew Dean was probably
right, but the words slurred out of his mouth anyways. “Did that asshole let
you see Sammy?”
Dean rubbed his hands over his face and said calmly through gritted teeth. “Yes
Dad, I saw Sammy. Please don’t call Castiel and Gabriel assholes. It doesn’t
help the situation.”
John snorted and slurred, “The bastard won’t let me see my own son. I can call
them what I wish.”
Dean started to rub his temples. He took a slow calming breath and said firmly.
“That is because you told Gabriel you could cut Sam’s hair to make him look
like a man. When Gabriel told you no. You advised him that Sammy doesn’t want
to be a faggot and told him it would be better to kill Sammy instead.”
John groaned as his head started to pound. He snipped, “It’s true.”
Dean gave an exasperated sigh, “You said that in front of two very powerful gay
princes. You offended them. Well, you offended Gabriel. I don’t think Castiel
cared what you thought. You should be happy Gabriel still lets you talk to
Sammy on the phone.”
John shook his head as he pounding turned into a spinning world. He groaned and
slurred out, “I was still right. Sammy is straight, unlike whatever the fuck
you are.”
Dean pinched the bridge of his nose because he didn’t want to have this
conversation right now for the millionth time. Quietly Dean said, “Just go to
sleep, Dad.”
John nodded and Dean helped his father up and moved him to his bedroom. Dean
lowered John down on the bed. He pulled off his father’s shoes and covered him
with the blanket. He went into the bathroom and emptied the small trashcan. He
placed it by his father’s bedside along with a glass of water. Dean walked out
of the room but left the door cracked incase his father needed anything.
Dean wandered into his own room and laid down. He stared at the ceiling for a
moment. He missed Sam and he wished he could take Sammy away from all of this
but he couldn’t. Even if he managed to get Sam out of there without Gabriel
noticing and out of the country. All of the surrounding countries had
extradition agreements for slaves. Sam still would not be safe. Attempting to
run away with Sam would probably only result in them both getting killed.
Dean thought back to his visit with Sam. His brother had made a couple of
different types of pie for the visit because Sammy knew it was Dean’s favorite
dessert. Actually, Castiel told Sammy that but nonetheless Sammy knew and he
tried to make Dean feel okay.
Sam was taller than him now, which would be amazing if Sam would actually stand
up straight. Dean never said anything to Sam about that. He did notice that Sam
seemed a little different on this visit. Sam seemed less tense and Gabriel was
praising him a lot. Dean had no idea what that meant. Well actually, he had a
pretty good idea what that meant. Gabriel was screwing his underage brother.
The very idea nauseated him and he couldn’t remember how many times he threw up
on that visit because of it.
Dean didn’t tell Castiel that he was sickened by the notion of Gabriel touching
Sam. He corrected his train of thought from touching to molesting. Dean had no
idea what sort of manipulation Gabriel pulled off to get Sammy to agree to
that. Dean knew Sam agreed to it though because Sam wasn’t twitchy or scared
around Gabriel.
He knew he had to talk to Castiel. Dean knew Castiel wouldn’t forbid him from
seeing Sam like Gabriel would. Dean sighed and got up to go to Castiel’s house.
++
Dean drove to Castiel’s house and knocked on the door. He knew it was the
middle of the night, but Dean couldn’t bring himself to care.
After a couple minutes, Cas opened the door in his pajamas and looked like he
had been asleep. Cas stared blankly at Dean for a few moments then he said
sleepily, “Hello Dean, are you okay?”
Dean shrugged in a noncommittal way and asked, “Ah, I want to talk or
something. Can I come in?”
Cas stepped back so Dean could enter his house. It was small but in a nice
neighborhood. Once Dean was inside Cas closed and locked the door. He knew Dean
had not been inside his place since they found out Sam was alive. Castiel was
never sure how to be a good host and Dean had been pissed at him for months
now. He didn’t want to mess this up. Awkwardly, Castiel motioned to the sofa
and said, “Please have a seat, Dean.”
Dean eyed Cas for a moment then he sat down. The inside of Castiel’s house was
nothing like Gabriel’s. The furniture, Dean guessed was bought new but it
wasn’t top end by any means. Cas had textbooks scattered on the coffee table
and dishes drying in the dish rack by the sink in the kitchen. It looked very
average. It wasn’t at all what Dean would expect from a Novak. The state of
Castiel’s house wasn’t something Dean thought much about when he thought Cas
was just an average guy. But now, he could see the stark difference between the
two brothers.
Sarcastically Dean asked, “So do you have a slave tied up somewhere?” He knew
he shouldn’t say that but he couldn’t resist.
Castiel sat down next to Dean and gave a small smile. He quietly said, “No, I
find I am capable of managing my household myself.” He paused and added, “I was
honest when I told you I am not like my brothers.”
Dean shook his head and asked, “So umm, is this you slumming it?”
Castiel laughed and said adamantly, “No, it is not. The house was paid for by
my family, but my tutoring pays for all the other bills and I saved up to buy
all the furnishings. It isn’t the college experience I wanted, but Michael
wouldn’t let me live in student housing or have roommates.”
Dean closed his eyes and said slowly, “Michael is a dick.”
Castiel couldn’t argue that point. Michael was a dick. Cas agreed with a
simple, “I know.” He asked tentatively, “Why are you here, Dean? I may be wrong
but I am hopeful that you are here to forgive me for everything. I am truly
sorry for hurting you and not being truthful.”
Dean eyed Cas for a moment. He gruffly said, “Yeah, I know. I should quit being
a dick to you. It’s not your fault one of your brothers wants to kill my
brother and another one of your brothers wants to fuck my brother.”
Castiel was quiet for a moment. Then he said carefully, “Dean, I am doing
everything I can to keep Sam safe. I admit I am pretty powerless in this
situation but I do what I can. I would like the chance to prove to you that I
can be trusted again. I would like to be able to date you again. I care about
you and your brother deeply.”
Dean leaned his elbows on his knees and rubbed his temples. Things have not
been going well for him and Cas since Dean found out about Sam. Outwardly, they
have been pretending still be in a relationship, so Dean could see Sam. But
behind closed doors, Dean was still seething at Castiel and they weren’t
dating.
Dean sighed and said defeated, “Fine. You don’t hold it against me for my dad
being a complete dick. I suppose I shouldn’t hold your brothers against you.”
He paused and gritted out, “I’m sorry, Cas. Really I am, you’ve been good to me
and Sammy.”
Castiel nodded and said thoughtfully, “I am sorry too, Dean. I should have been
honest with who I am from the start. I just wanted to be like everyone else so
badly; I forgot what my deception might do to people I care about.”
Dean frowned and said simply, “I understand, Cas. For what it’s worth, I
wouldn’t have given you the time of day if I knew you were Castiel Novak. But I
got to know you and you are a pretty cool guy that is hot.”
Castiel blushed and said quietly, “Thank you, Dean.” Castiel paused and said
thoughtfully, “I was going to call you in the morning. I finally got Gabriel to
answer me on what medication he is giving Sam and why.”
Dean looked up and said curiously, “Oh?” It never failed to amaze Dean how
quickly Castiel could change the subject and most of the time, he was certain
Castiel wasn’t even trying to change the subject.
Castiel nodded and said carefully, “Gabriel had Sam checked medically after he
moved down south. He found that Sam had many nutritional deficiencies. The
medications Sam takes at breakfast are prescription supplements. My
understanding is prescription supplements will give a higher absorption rate.”
Dean nodded and said quietly, “I knew Sam wasn’t healthy when they took him. So
I guess it is a good thing Gabriel is taking care of him like that.” He didn’t
really think Sam needed supplements. Dean saw what Gabriel fed Sam and it was
healthy for the most part.
Castiel nodded and continued, “Sam has understandably had some problems with
depression. According to Gabriel, Sam had been suicidal in the past. Sam has
never attempted anything but Gabriel put him on an antidepressant. Gabriel has
changed the medication a few times to find the right one and he says that Sam
doesn’t want to take the medication.”
Dean looked at Castiel questioningly, “So he is drugging my brother to get him
compliant?”
Cas frowned and said carefully, “No, he doesn’t want to change Sam’s
personality or so he says. Although, I think it is safe to say we are both
seeing the changes in Sam’s demeanor? I don’t know if that is good or not, but
I hope for Sam’s sake it is a positive change. Sam’s suicidal ideation is why
Gabriel won’t let your father see Sam. He doesn’t want anyone in a position of
authority over Sam telling him to that he would be better off dead.” He paused
and added, "Gabriel did say that he wants to try to get Sam off that medication
within a year, but it all depends on how Sam is doing."
Dean nodded and said quietly, “Honestly, I don’t think it is a positive change.
But I’ll tell you what I do know, no matter how Sam comes out of this, I am
going to fix him and protect him from all the assholes in the world.”
Castiel smiled at Dean and replied, “You’re a good brother, Dean.” He paused
and added, “Sam is taking a sleep aid. Gabriel said that Sam would get
nightmares and he would only sleep for 4 hours at a time. The sleep aid helps
Sam to sleep through the night. My understanding is Sam doesn’t like to take
that medication, either.”
Dean chuckled and said, “No, he wouldn’t. Before this he was a stubborn
bastard.” He looked over at Castiel and asked bluntly, “So this last time we
were there, I noticed Gabriel was a little more touchy feely with Sam. Do you
think Gabriel is doing anything sexual with Sam? I know he said he wouldn’t
without Sam’s consent but Sam is still just a kid.”
Castiel was silent while he processed what Dean was saying. He tentatively
said, “Yes, I think they are sexually active. However, neither of them have
told me that. I don’t think Gabriel would force himself on Sam. The reason I
say that is because at least outwardly Gabriel seems to be putting a lot of
effort into not hurting Sam. If he raped Sam that would undoubtedly hurt Sam
which seems to be the opposite of what Gabriel wants.”
Dean nodded because that made sense. He sighed and leaned back. Dean said
quietly, “I just don’t want Sam to do anything he is going to regret.”
Castiel leaned in to Dean and brushed his lips against Dean’s. He hadn’t been
able to be this close to Dean in months, nearly a year. He gave Dean a small
peck on the lips and whispered, “We all do things we regret, Dean.”
Dean closed his eyes and pulled a hand up to wrap around the back of Castiel’s
neck he groaned and kissed Cas deeply. He pulled back and whispered, “You’re
right. I regret not doing this with you more.”
++
Dean left Castiel’s house a few hours later. He was glad nothing went further
than making out and rutting up against each other. He was okay with forgiving
Cas, but that still didn’t mean he wanted to have full on makeup sex. Dean was
grateful Castiel and Gabriel looked nothing alike. If they did Dean was certain
he wouldn’t be able to even look at Cas. None the less, Dean was feeling pretty
good after leaving Castiel’s house. He had a goodtime and he found out a little
bit more about how Sam was being treated.
Dean wasn’t happy about the antidepressants and the sleep aids. Sam had never
really been a depressed kid as Dean recalled. His brother had been moody and
rebellious, but never really sad or depressed. It made Dean worry about Sam a
little more, because it just didn’t seem like his brother. He knew, however,
that given Sam’s situation being depressed sounded like the least terrible of
all the things that could be going on in his baby brother’s head.
More than anything, Dean just hoped that whatever Sam was going through now did
not cause him to eventually kill himself. Gabriel was right, if their dad had
told Sam to kill himself and he was already having thoughts about it. Dean knew
that could have been enough to push Sam over the edge.
After Dean got home, he quietly checked on his dad. John appeared to still be
asleep and snoring loudly. Dean shook his head and closed the door. He wandered
into his room and sat down on the bed. Dean carefully pulled out Sam’s box of
postcards.
Dean flipped through them until he found one that was covered in sunflowers. He
wondered what the significance of the sunflowers were to Sam. He remembered
sleeping in sunflower field one night when they didn’t have enough money for a
motel room and their dad was away on a hunt. It was a nice night and it wasn’t
cold. The insects from the field were the only thing that bothered Dean.
He flipped over the postcard to read what Sam wrote:
“I scavenged for food in the woods today because Dean is sick. I will miss
getting to cook for Dean; I made a soup out of chicory and water.”
Dean remembered that. The soup tasted terrible but it was food so Dean didn’t
complain. It was the summer before Sam was taken. Dean wasn’t able to work to
get money for food and Sam wasn’t having any luck with finding odd jobs, so Sam
scavenged instead. Dean had never in his life been more appreciative on his
brother’s geek knowledge. Sam’s knowledge of plants saved them.
It made Dean frown a little, because even then when they were pretty screwed.
Sam didn’t seen sad, depressed, or anything that you would expect someone to
feel in that situation. It made Dean wonder what changed in Sam’s mind to make
him want to hurt himself. But Dean knew in his heart, what Sam was going
through now was worse than anything they had to deal with growing up. 
***** Chapter 18 *****
Sam was working on making bread while Gabriel was reading at the nearby table.
It comforted Sam to have Gabriel close and he was grateful he was allowed this
time downstairs. He knew it was silly in some ways, but aside from Tuesdays and
Thursdays when he got to go to the church coming downstairs to cook and eat was
almost like an escape.
It was the watchful eyes of the guards that made Sam uneasy. He knew these
guards were different. They weren’t the ones that hurt him almost three years
ago, but it still scared him. Sometimes, Sam wondered if they would hurt him or
if they would be kind to him. He had watched them out of the study window many
times and he had never seen them hurt the two other slaves. Sam knew he wasn’t
allowed to speak to them, so he didn’t ask.
Sam was busy kneading the bread when he heard someone approach him. He felt a
sliver of fear go through him and he checked to see if Gabriel was near before
he turned to see who it was. Gabriel had not looked up from his reading, but
Sam knew he could still call for him. Tentatively, Sam turned and saw Candy
Apple.
She looked different. Her hair was longer, just past her shoulders and she had
color in her skin. She had a smile on her face and Sam couldn’t understand what
she was doing here. Candy Apple grinned at him and said quietly, “I turned 21,
so I am going home today. I just wanted to say thank you to you before I left.
Whatever influence you have on Master it caused my life to get a lot better.
And I appreciate you not taking advantage of me, even though they almost killed
you for it.”
Sam stared at her dumbfounded for a moment. He didn’t know what to say for
sure. He lowered his eyes and whispered, “Please don’t thank me. I’m just a
slave. Everything I have is because Master allows it.”
Candy Apple gave Sam a sad smile and said quietly, “Sam, do me a favor? Don’t
forget who you were and who you wanted to be. If you do, you’re going to be
here forever.”
Sam nodded because that made sense he thought. He checked to see if they had
gotten Gabriel’s attention and he was surprised to see they had not. He
whispered back to her, “Who were you before?”
Candy Apple shrugged and whispered, “My name was Meg and I had a little sister.
She looked up to me like I was her world. It was wanting to come back to her in
one piece that kept me going.” She turned to walk away but before she did she
added, “Sam, you have a brother that loves you dearly, just remember that.”
Then Meg walked away from him.
Sam was a little taken aback by the conversation. He had been genuinely curious
what Candy Apple’s name was and now he knew. She was Meg. She had a strength
about her that Sam was certain he didn’t have inside him or if he did it got
hacked to pieces at some point and removed.
Sam moved the dough to a bowl and covered it with a towel. He sat it in the
microwave for safe keeping while it rose. Sam wandered over to where Gabriel
was sitting and knelt down at his feet. He leaned his head against Gabriel’s
knee and closed his eyes. He felt safe, loved, and like nothing in the world
could hurt him when he was like this. It made him wonder why Meg would want him
to give this up.
He started to hum in appreciation quietly when he felt Gabriel start to lightly
pet his hair. Sam was happy and at peace. He wondered briefly what that made
him in the grand scheme of things. He wondered if it made him weak, but really
he knew it showed that he was right where he need to be.
Gabriel enjoyed this side of Sam. He was moldable to whatever it was he wanted.
He hardly talked back but he still retained passions about some things. Once he
figured out that Sam practically mewled when he was praised or given affection.
It wasn’t difficult to use that to his advantage. He knew it was probably
wrong, but Gabriel reasoned with himself that if he didn’t make Sam feel loved
or wanted. Sam could go crazy like Lilith and Eve.
He didn’t want Sam to end up like that. Gabriel was much happier with the
affectionate boy he had at his feet. Originally he wasn’t sure how well Sam
would take to the idea of kneeling by him. At first, he could tell Sam wasn’t
pleased. There was a look of defiance in Sam’s eyes at the time, but he still
obeyed. It didn’t take long for Sam to warm up to the idea because the kneeling
granted Sam more attention, praise, and affection.
Gabriel was quite pleased that when Sam wasn’t busy he would come kneel at his
feet without prompting. The only time Sam didn’t was when Dean was around. Sam
tended to gravitate toward his brother more then and Gabriel could understand
that. He also knew that Dean wouldn’t like to see his brother kneeling before
anyone.
The only area of Gabriel’s life that wasn’t improving was his sex life with
Sam. He could order Sam to strip anytime and the boy would. However, Sam would
never go any further with him then giving him a hand job. Gabriel had mentioned
oral and anal sex to Sam and Sam had reservations. He wanted to give Sam time,
but it was difficult. Gabriel was willing to wait though, because he knew if he
waited, was patient, and let Sam be a willing participant then Sam would be
more likely to stay with him.
Gabriel pulled his mind out of the gutter, because he was tempted to drag Sam
back upstairs and have some fun. But he knew he promised Sam bread making time
and he enjoyed freshly baked bread. Well actually, he enjoyed Sam making
cinnamon rolls with half the dough. He was pretty sure Sam knew that though.
Quietly Gabriel said, “Did you enjoy talking to Candy Apple?”
Sam blinked a couple times and froze under Gabriel’s petting. He hadn’t
realized Gabriel knew he was talking to Candy Apple. He also wasn’t sure if
that was allowed. No one aside from Gabriel, Castiel, Dean, and his father had
spoken to him downstairs in years. Nervously Sam said, “Yes, Master. I’m sorry,
Master.”
Gabriel smiled down at Sam and said calmly, “You’re not in trouble, Sam. I am
glad she told you to remember who you were before and not to forget about Dean.
Do you know why, Sam?”
Sam bit down on his lip and wondered if it would be acceptable to curl up in a
ball at Gabriel’s feet. He restrained himself and answered Gabriel honestly,
“No, Master.”
Gabriel sighed and said clearly, “Before you came here, you were a starving and
basically homeless boy. You and your brother were second in your father’s life
to hunting. Sam, you and Dean should have been John’s first priority but it
wasn’t.  Your father hit you when you disobeyed him. All you wanted, Sam, was a
home and food. You didn’t want to move around all the time.”
He paused. Gabriel could see Sam’s fingers fidgeting and he knew Sam was
thinking about what he said. Carefully Gabriel asked, “What do I give you,
Sam?”
Sam knew the answer to this question. It was an easy answer. He breathed out,
“Everything, Master.” Sam felt a light squeeze on the back of his neck and he
knew Gabriel was wanting him to be more specific. Quietly Sam said, “You gave
me a home and food. You treat me well and you’ve never hit me. I feel safe and
loved with you. Thank you, Master.”
Gabriel started lightly carding through Sam’s hair again and asked, “What about
your brother?”
Sam thought for a moment and said tentatively, “You allow Dean to be in my life
because you know he is important to me. I wish I could see Dean more, but I am
grateful that my slavery caused him to break away from hunting and go to
college.” He paused and he wasn’t sure what else Gabriel wanted him to say. Sam
decided to end it with thanking Gabriel because he noticed Gabriel liked that
even if sometimes Sam felt off about saying the words. “Thank you for allowing
me to be your slave, Master.”
Gabriel chuckled and said, “I think Castiel has a vested interest in you being
in Dean’s life, as well. He seems quite fond of your brother. I also think
Castiel likes you. He asks about you all the time.” Gabriel watched as Sam’s
body language changed slightly and he knew Sam was smiling. He hoped he buried
the seeds of doubt that Candy Apple had placed in Sam’s head. Gabriel glanced
up at the clock and said, “I think you need to go check your bread dough, Sam.
It has been about 30 minutes.”
++
By midafternoon Sam was done baking bread and Gabriel happily ate most of the
cinnamon rolls. Gabriel let Sam have one which he appreciated but he never
cared for sweets as much as Gabriel. Sam was certain they were about to go back
upstairs for a time when he heard the front door open and Gabriel got an odd
look on his face. Sam wasn’t sure what to make of it.
Gabriel got up from the kitchen and walked out into the foyer. Sam followed and
he was taken aback by what he saw. It was another male slave. A new one as far
as Sam could tell. He was muscular and had his hair cut off. The slave was
shorter than Sam and was dressed in the plain greyish blue clothes of a slave.
Sam hadn’t dressed like that for years. The slave had a bulky collar which Sam
knew meant he was just a household slave and not a personal slave of Gabriel’s
like him.
However, that didn’t stop the flare of jealousy that went through Sam. He heard
Gabriel say, “Kneel, Sam.” He dropped to his knees and lowered his head. Sam
couldn’t see what Gabriel was doing exactly but he could see that Gabriel was
walking around the other slave. He wondered if Gabriel was accessing him or
deciding that this one was more suitable than him. Sam knew that this slave
wasn’t scarred up and he thought that this new slave probably wouldn’t let fear
keep him from doing anything to please Gabriel.
Sam felt a couple of tears fall down his face because he wondered how stupid he
could have been to trust Gabriel. Now if he was lucky, he was just going to get
cast aside and used for sloppy seconds. However, he knew there was a higher
probably was that Gabriel would just kill him and be done with him. Sam started
to sob and when he wondered if Gabriel would just let him go be Castiel’s slave
instead of killing him or casting him aside. At least, if he was with Castiel
he wouldn’t have to see his replacement every day.
Gabriel wasn’t sure why Sam was crying. He turned back from Candy Apple’s
replacement to look at Sam. The kid was trembling as he cried and it made
Gabriel feel bad. He decided to finish introducing himself quickly so he could
get Sam upstairs and find out what was going on. Gabriel was hoping that Sam
was just tired. Gabriel turned around and said to the new slave, “My name is
Gabriel Novak. I am the Master of the house.” He motioned towards Sam and said,
“This is Sam. He is my personal slave. You are a general household slave. Your
interaction with Sam will be limited.” Gabriel paused and sighed when he
remembered he had to name the slave. He pondered out loud, “What should I name
you?”
The slave spoke up and said nervously, “My name is Henry.”
Gabriel gave a smug chuckle and turned to Sam. He knew Sam was upset but he
asked anyways, “Sam, who named you?”
Sam knew this question was rhetorical in a lot of ways. He knew his mother, if
he could even think of her as such, named him when he was free. He knew that
was not the answer Gabriel was looking for. He knew that if anyone asked
Gabriel named him. Sam couldn’t bring himself to stop crying because of the
rejection that he felt. He sobbed out, “You did, Master.”
Gabriel could see the new slave’s nervousness start to show as fear. He sighed.
The only reason he renamed the slaves was because he thought it was funny to
name them after candy. He never regretted not renaming Sam though, because he
wanted to treat Sam better than that. Calmly Gabriel said, “Very good, Sam.” He
paused and turned back to this new slave. He cocked his head to the side and
pondered, “Should I name you Gummy Bear or Gummy Worm?”
Sam really didn’t know why but it made him jealous for Gabriel to be spending
time with this new slave. He remembered when Gabriel named him. He was bleeding
out in Gabriel’s bathtub. Sam knew it didn’t exactly make for the best first
impression, but Sam also knew that Gabriel was different with him. Gabriel
treated Sam differently than he was currently treating this new slave. Sam
didn’t understand and that just made him want to cry harder.
Sam heard Gabriel calmly say, “I am going to name you Gummy Bear. It seems
fitting. Lollipop will show you to your room and help you get settled. You will
be taking over the tasks that belonged to Candy Apple.” Sam felt Gabriel brush
a hand through his hair and say quietly, “Come on Sam, let’s go upstairs.” Sam
got up and caught the scared look on Gummy Bear’s face as he started up the
stairs. He hoped he conveyed the message clearly to Gummy Bear to stay away
from him, but he was fairly certain he failed.
Gabriel led Sam into their bedroom and closed the door. He noticed that Sam’s
sobbing had not letup and Sam had his arms wrapped around himself. Carefully
Gabriel asked, “What’s wrong, Sam?”
Sam shook and stammered out, “You.. You’re going to replace me with .. with
him.”
Gabriel got it now. Sam was jealous which made absolutely no sense to Gabriel.
He guided Sam over to their bed and sat down on the edge with Sam. He started
to rub circles into Sam’s back and said quietly, “Sam, why would you think that
I would want to replace you?”
Sam shrugged and he knew he was probably going to get in trouble for self-
hatred but it was the truth. Through his tears Sam said, “I’m all scarred up
and he’s not. He’ll probably do anything to please you and I won’t because I’m
scared. Sometimes, I just don’t understand why you don’t make me.” He pleaded,
“You could have made me. You didn’t have to replace me. I can be good.” Sam
broke down a little more and brokenly begged, “If.. If you don’t want me. Can
you give me to Castiel instead of killing me?”
Gabriel pulled Sam into a hug and gave Sam a kiss on the top of his head. He
felt Sam shutter in his arms. Quietly Gabriel said, “I’m not replacing you, Sam
and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do to prove yourself to
me.” He started to card a hand through Sam’s long hair as Sam tried to calm
down. Gabriel knew his idea of Sam having a friend near his own age was gone by
this point. He knew Sam was probably going to be mildly hostile towards Gummy
Bear for the foreseeable future.
Sam sniffled in Gabriel’s arms and sheepishly said, “I don’t want you doing
anything sexual with him.”
Gabriel nodded. He honestly hadn’t done anything with anyone since Sam started
jerking him off and before that he never did anything where Sam would have had
a way of finding out. He knew he could hide sexual exploits from Sam easily
enough, but if he wanted to maintain a level of trust with Sam. He knew he
couldn’t. Quietly Gabriel said, “I wasn’t planning on it, Sam. I have you and
that is all I need.” He gave Sam another peck on the top of his head.
Sam was quiet for a moment. He knew Michael and Lucifer were not exactly
faithful to Lilith and Eve. He knew that Lilith and Eve were not exactly known
for their kindness when they go their hands on one of those slaves. He
stammered out, “Michael and Lucifer aren’t faithful, so why would you be?” Sam
wondered why he said that.
Gabriel chuckled and said calmly, “Sam, I really try not to be like my
brothers. That is why I’ve never hit you for starters. I know that for you to
stay with me once you have a choice. I can’t screw anything that moves. Gummy
Bear isn’t allowed up here and the only person I share my bed with is you.
You’re the only one with my collar around his neck. He’ll never have that. No
one else will ever have that so long as you are with me.”
Sam reached up a hand to wipe away his tears. He felt a little silly, but he
still felt a little jealousy inside of him. He sheepishly said, “I still don’t
like him.”
Gabriel nodded and slowly repositioned him and Sam so he was leaning against
the headboard and Sam was leaning on his chest. He felt Sam hold on to him
which never failed to feel nice. Gabriel reached over and opened the drawer on
Sam’s nightstand. He pulled out a blank postcard and an ink pen. He gave Sam a
gentle kiss on the top of his head and said, “Let’s get you thinking about more
positive things, shall we?”
Sam took the postcard and held it in his hand for a few moments. It was covered
in gummy bears which for some reason made Sam’s heart hurt a little more with
jealousy. He tried to stomp it down but he knew he probably failed. Sam knew
Gabriel just pulled out the postcard that was on top so it wasn’t intentional
on Gabriel’s part. Quietly Sam said, “I hate gummy bears and I don’t know what
to write.”
Gabriel hummed for a moment and said thoughtfully, “I am more of a sour gummy
worm guy myself.” He knew Sam was referring to Gummy Bear with his statement
and he decided to deflect it as much as he could. He calmly said, “I think you
had a good day today. You got to bake and you pleased me. You did everything I
asked of you and you didn’t complain. You got to talk to Dean today and your
brother seems to be doing well.”
Sam wondered how being jealous of Gummy Bear and telling Gabriel he didn’t like
the guy did not constitute as complaining but he didn’t ask. Despite Gabriel’s
recap of the day, Sam couldn’t think of anything to write. Sam knew that if he
took away the Gummy Bear incident; today was a good day. Quietly Sam said, “I
don’t know what to write.”
Gabriel nodded and adjusted his grip on Sam. He carefully asked, “Would you
like for me to tell you what to write?” He had never done that before but given
Sam’s mental state. He thought Sam might be willing to do that. He figured
dictating a couple sentences to Sam to reassure Sam wouldn’t hurt anything.
Slowly, Sam nodded in acceptance.
Gabriel thought for a moment. Then he said calmly. “I want you to write. ‘I
enjoyed making cinnamon rolls because it made Gabriel happy and extra sweet.’”
Gabriel paused while Sam gave a light chuckle as he wrote. He was glad this was
having the desired effect. Once Sam was done writing he added, “Humm, what will
you miss about today? I know. ‘I will miss Candy Apple because I know she will
miss being a slave.’”
Sam gave a small smile and wrote down the sentence. He was fairly certain she
was not going to miss being a slave. But he didn’t tell Gabriel that. He read
back over what Gabriel told him to write and he was pleased with it. Candy
Apple did deserve a place in his postcards. Sam handed the postcard back to
Gabriel to be put away and he whispered, “Thank you, Gabriel.” 
***** Chapter 19 *****
Castiel was worried. He had gotten a phone call stating that someone had shot
Gabriel on his college campus today. It wasn’t a bad injury and Gabriel would
survive, but it did mean that Gabriel would be in the hospital for a few days.
Castiel had no idea where on Gabriel’s body he took the bullet or how an injury
wasn’t bad but still required him to be in the hospital a few days.
Castiel was currently driving to Dean’s apartment. Castiel knew he had to get
down to not only make sure Gabriel was okay, but make sure Sam was okay. He
knew Sam wasn’t allowed to go downstairs without Gabriel. Castiel knew that Sam
did not have any food up where he was and the accident was a few hours ago. He
knew Sam was probably getting worried. He wanted to have Dean with him before
he spoke Sam so Dean could calm Sam down if needed.
He stopped in front of Dean’s apartment and rushed up to the door. He banged on
it a few times before Dean answered looking confused.
Dean was in the middle of taking an afternoon nap and he was startled to see
Castiel. He was immediately put on edge by the look of worry on Castiel’s face.
“What’s wrong?”
Castiel shook his head, “I need to know if you would like to stay with me at
Gabriel’s place for a week. Gabriel was shot. He is going to be fine. Honestly,
I am concerned about him and Sam.”
Dean rubbed his hands over his face and turned back and walked to his bedroom.
He started a half hazard method of throwing clothes into his duffel. He saw
that Cas was watching him. He asked with focus, “Is Sammy okay?”
Cas nodded and said calmly, “Sam was at home at the time of the attack. He
doesn’t know, yet. However it is past Gabriel’s normal time to be home and Sam
is currently upstairs.”
Dean sighed and hefted his bag over his shoulder. He asked curiously, “How do
you know Sammy is upstairs?”
Castiel shook his head on the way out to his car. “Sam isn’t allowed
downstairs, Dean. We are taking a flight to get there sooner.”
Dean paled at the mention of a flight. Flying was unnatural to in Dean’s
opinion. He didn’t like the idea. Dean stalled, “Umm, how about you fly and I
just drive? I don’t like being without my baby.” He put a cheesy smile on his
face and hoped Cas would buy it.
Castiel didn’t. He rolled his eyes and said flatly, “Fine, I was hoping you
would want to make sure your brother is okay while I check on my brother but
clearly that isn’t the case. I will let Sam know when I get there that you will
be there whenever you get done road tripping.”
Dean kept the fake smile on his face and said nervously, “Sounds like a plan,
Cas. I am sure Sammy is fine and will understand.” He knew the Sam before all
of this would tease him relentlessly for backing out on a flight. However, the
Sam that was currently locked up somewhere would not. This new Sam would just
nod and accept whatever it was Castiel said.
++
Castiel arrived at Gabriel’s mansion about two hours later. Despite his
protests, Dean insisted on driving which while Cas wasn’t going to hold it
against Dean it did make him wonder. Castiel wandered his way into Gabriel’s
house and was greeted by an unfamiliar slave, a male which was odd. He tilted
his head at the slave and said calmly, “I am Castiel. Who are you?”
The slave didn’t look at Castiel which annoyed him, but he didn’t say anything.
He knew it wasn’t the slave’s fault. Passively the slave said, “Gummy Bear.”
Castiel couldn’t help the eye roll. He had agitation in his voice. “My
brother’s sense of humor is bizarre sometimes. Do you know where Sam is?”
The slave nodded and said passively, “In Master’s private quarters.”
Castiel nodded and walked up the stairs. He carefully unlocked the door and
walked in. It was clean as it always was. He walked down the hallway in search
of Sam and he found Sam in the study. Sam was staring out the window and he
looked like he had been crying. It was midafternoon. Castiel knew from the
schedule Gabriel had that Sam’s tutor would be here soon and it was unlikely
that Sam had eaten anything since this morning.
Castiel cleared his throat from the doorway and watched Sam turn to look at
him. He watched in shock as Sam immediately lowered his eyes and dropped to the
ground on his knees trembling. This was different and Castiel had not seen Sam
do this before. He walked into the room and said firmly, “Sam, please don’t do
that.”
Sam slowly looked up and said quietly, “Sorry Sir.”
Castiel closed his eyes for a moment. Then he walked over to Sam and helped him
up. He knew he had to stay calm but he was going to chew Gabriel out later for
this. As calmly as he could Castiel said, “Sam, you know you can call me,
Castiel. What has gotten into you? Why are you acting like this?”
Sam stayed quiet and lowered his eyes. His gaze was nudged back up by Castiel
and he could see that Cas was concerned. Quietly Sam said, “I want to be
pleasing. Gabriel likes it.”
Castiel stared at Sam in a moment in shock. Gabriel did this to Sam. Castiel
struggled for something to say for a moment then he said calmly, “Sam, Gabriel
is in the hospital but he is going to be fine. He should be home in a few days.
Dean will be here in a few hours since he refused to fly on a plane.” Castiel
watched as Sam nodded in acceptance. He was expecting Sam to ask what was wrong
with Gabriel but no question came.
Castiel let out a slow breath and said carefully, “Okay, we should go
downstairs and get you something to eat before your tutor gets here.”
Throughout the day, Castiel noticed that Gabriel had a firm control on Sam.
When they got downstairs to the kitchen Castiel had to tell Sam what type of
sandwich to make after Sam stared at him blankly. He had to tell Sam what to
cook for dinner. Castiel had to give Sam his antidepressant which as it turns
out Gabriel was weaning him off of. He had to find where Gabriel kept Sam’s
clothes to find his pajamas and clothes for Sam to wear the next day.
It was exhausting and Castiel realized how very little control over his life
Sam actually had. He did interrogate Sam and found out that Gabriel did not hit
him or say mean things to him. Castiel knew exactly what Gabriel did without
Sam ever telling him. Gabriel slowly took away all of Sam’s control while
making his life as pleasant as possible. Gabriel made it so that he was the
center of Sam’s world and the only one that could protect him. Castiel could
not begin to express how angry this made him. Gabriel had broken Sam.
++
Dean didn’t arrive until morning and Castiel didn’t ask what took him so long.
He stopped Dean in the foyer before he could go up to see Sam. He knew Dean
would blow up unless somehow Sam was able to flip a switch and seem more like
the Sam, Dean knew.
Dean looked at Cas in confusion when he was stopped. He was tired. His baby got
two flat tires on the drive and it took forever to get two replacement tires.
It was not a good trip. He just wanted to check on Sammy and take a nap.
Tiredly Dean said, “What is it, Cas?”
Slowly Castiel said, “We need to talk about Sam.” He paused when Dean raised an
eyebrow. Castiel sighed and said, “I think Gabriel may have broken Sam.”
Dean narrowed his eyes on Castiel and walked past him. He made his way upstairs
to find Sam after he deposited his duffel in the room him and Cas stayed in. He
found Sam in Gabriel’s bedroom. He walked in and leaned against the wall. Sam
was sitting on the bed which was neatly made just looking a little lost.
Dean walked over to Sam and sat down next to his brother. Casually Dean said,
“How’s the strongest person I know?” Sam didn’t respond and Dean lowered his
elbows to his knees. He rested his head in his hands and wondered if Sam was
even still in there. They had been here a month ago and Sam was not this far
gone. Quietly Dean said, “Sammy, Castiel thinks Gabriel broke you, like broke
your will.”
Sam looked over at Dean for the first time and he didn’t understand why Dean
was so upset. He frowned at his brother. Sam was quiet when he spoke, “Gabriel
hasn’t hurt me. My will is still my own, Dean.”
Dean let out a slow breath and stated clearly, “I know I don’t say it nearly
enough, but you know I love you, Sammy. I love you more than anything in the
world. You’re more important to me than college, Dad, Castiel, my job. Nothing,
Sam and I mean nothing can ever come close to how much I care about and love
you.”
Sam frowned at Dean. He honestly didn’t understand why Dean would feel that
way. Sam carefully said, “Dean, I’m just a slave.”
Dean sighed and said firmly, “No, you’re not just a slave, Sam. You are my
brother and the Novaks can label you however they want, but do you know what?
At the end of the day, you are still my baby brother and I would die for you.
There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”
Sam didn’t say anything. He just thought back to when he wondered if he should
trust Gabriel or Dean. He went with Gabriel because Gabriel was there. Gabriel
provided for him and saved him when Dean was powerless. Sam didn’t understand.
Finally Sam whispered out, “I just want to survive, Dean. I can’t be who I was
and survive. That person gets beaten by the guards and doesn’t privileges.” Sam
turned and looked at Dean, “I can escape from this twice a week for a few
hours. I live for that. But if I do what Gabriel wants then I feel loved and
accepted. I don’t feel like I am on the verge of being executed or thrown to
the guards. I don’t know what’s wrong with feeling safe, even if I have to give
up part of myself to do it.”
Dean started to rub his temples and asked, “So are you letting him fuck you?”
Sam frowned and said simply, “No. He wants to but I am too afraid that it will
hurt to try it.”
Dean glanced over at Sam shook his head. He knew Sam was probably expecting him
to say something reassuring like it won’t hurt like a bastard with the proper
prep. But that’s not what Dean said firmly, “Sam, don’t let anyone put anything
up your ass. It’s going to hurt and you might bleed. Just don’t do it.”
Sam nodded but decided not to probe any further. He didn’t really want to talk
to Dean about his sex life. He could tell Dean disapproved but Dean wasn’t in
the situation he was in. Dean couldn’t possibly understand.  Still Sam was
excited about getting to see Dean. He carefully asked, “Why are you here,
Dean?”
Dean wondered if he should be offended by that question or not. He decided not
to be offended. He calmly said, “Gabriel is in the hospital, Sam. Castiel came
down to make sure everything stayed up and running here and to check on his
brother. He wanted me to come along to help you. So it looks like we are going
to get a few days together with minimal Novak interference. What do you want to
do?”
Dean was hopeful Sam would express some sort of desire. However, that is not
what he got. Instead he got a shrug and a flat, “Whatever pleases Castiel.”
Castiel was watching the exchange from the doorway. He was glad Dean could
extract some life out of Sam, but he was worried about Sam. Castiel stepped
into the room and said carefully, “I am going to give Dean full charge of you
until Gabriel gets out of the hospital. Sam, I don’t want you to blindly obey
Dean. I want you to remember what it is like to annoy him and do that. I want
you to tell him no at least once during your time together.”
Sam nodded in agreement and spoke quietly, “I can do that. Will I get to talk
to Gabriel?”
Castiel smiled and said calmly, “I will see what I can do. When I talked to him
he was worried about you.”
++
Dean decided the best way to bond with Sam was at a gun range. It probably
wasn’t normal but he was a Winchester and the Novaks had a private gun range.
Sam was still a perfect shot and Sam stared at his gun in awe. Dean did have
Sam’s actual handgun packed in the trunk of his car and he did see a flicker of
life in Sam’s eyes when he saw it.
After they were done shooting and Dean was driving back to the mansion with
pizzas. He looked at Sam and asked, “So how is Sam Winchester doing? You still
have the stuff, Sammy.”
Sam looked over at Dean with sad eyes and said calmly, “I’m not Sam Winchester
anymore, Dean. I don’t have a last name.” He shrugged and said, “I’m just Sam
but at least I didn’t get renamed something stupid.”
Dean sighed and frowned at Sam. He gruffly said, “They could have renamed you
Sasquatch for all I care. But to me, you will always be Sam Winchester and my
little brother.”
Sam was quiet for a moment then he asked cautiously, “Dean, who was I before
this? I mean besides Sam Winchester and your little brother.” 
Dean hummed for a moment. Then he said with a smile as he thought back, “Well
Sammy, you were a stubborn little twerp. You always had your own ideas about
things and you would argue your point to max. You were usually right, but you
were outspoken. You were street smart and you had tons of seemingly useless
knowledge that came from nowhere that always helped us survive.” He paused and
said, “You were the something the demons told Mary she wouldn’t miss. But the
demons forgot that you had a brother and a father that would miss you more than
anything. Dad saved you from them and Mary. You are something very important to
me, Sammy.”
Sam processed what Dean said for a moment. It was different than what Gabriel
said. It made Sam wonder if Gabriel was wrong and if what Dean said was what
Meg told him not to forget. Sam smiled at Dean and said, “Thank you, Dean.”
++
After dinner Dean was sitting Gabriel’s room with Sam. To say it was awkward
was an understatement. Dean glanced over at the nightstand which based on where
Sam was sitting he figured was Sam’s side of the bed. He saw a framed wallet
sized family photo of him, their dad, and Sammy. It was the one that Sam had
begged to have in his wallet and the one that was missing when Dean got Sam’s
clothes back.
Dean picked up the picture to look at a little closer and then he saw that Sam
looked nervous. Sam was fidgeting with his fingers and looked scared. Dean put
the picture back down and asked carefully, “What’s wrong, Sammy?”
Sam looked like he was about to cry when he said, “Please don’t take my
picture. It’s all I have left from before.”
Dean frowned and sat down. He calmly said, “I’m not going to take your picture,
Sam. It also isn’t all you have left. You still have me and Dad. I even have
some of your things. I have your gun and your knife. I even have your box of
postcards and once you’re free they will be yours again. They are still yours,
Sammy. If you want I can bring some other pictures of us from when we were
younger.”
Sam gave a small smile and said quietly, “I would like that.” He looked up at
Dean and asked nervously, “Did you read my postcards?”
Dean gave a half-smile and he said carefully. “Yes, I did. I don’t want you to
think I was invading your privacy. I thought you were dead and it was a way to
be close to you. Then once I found out you were alive but in this situation. I
continued to read what you wrote to be close to you. They make me happy because
I remembered the times we had together and they make me sad because I miss you
so much.”
Sam nodded and asked sheepishly, “You don’t think it was girly or anything?”
Dean grinned and said, “No Sammy, I don’t.” He paused and said thoughtfully,
“In fact, I carry one of your postcards with me. I had it laminated so it
wouldn’t get damaged since you wrote in pencil. I always read it when I’m
having a bad day.”
Dean pulled out a postcard and handed it to Sam. It was worn and Sam knew it
was from before he had a box for his postcards. It had a picture of a city at
night. Sam couldn’t remember what city it was. He flipped over the card and
looked at his handwriting. Sam guessed he was probably about 5 or 6 and had
just learned how to write.
“Dean is my hero. He is the best!! I miss covering Dean in dirt.”
Sam frowned and asked, “Why did I cover you in dirt?”
Dean shrugged and said playfully, “Who knows, you’re my little brother. It is
in your job description to annoy me.” 
Sam handed it back to Dean tentatively. Dean took the card and put it back in
his jacket pocket. He patted Sam on the leg and asked, “Do you know who my hero
is?”
Sam shook his head no and said nervously, “Dad, maybe?”
Dean grinned and said confidently, “Nope, my hero happens to be sitting right
next to me. You’re my hero, Sam.”
Sam shrugged and said jokingly, “I’ve only saved your life twice.”
Dean smiled and said, “You’ve saved my life more than that, Sam.” He paused and
pleaded, “Sammy, please don’t let this place make you give up who you are.”
Sam swallowed hard and said, “I won’t, Dean. I promise.”
 
***** Chapter 20 *****
Gabriel came home from the hospital five days later. He was sore. He was shot
in between his right shoulder and his lung. He knew he was lucky. However, that
didn’t make him feel better. Castiel had righteously chewed him out while he
was drugged up on pain medication in a hospital bed. He tried to plead his case
to Castiel but it fell on deaf ears. Gabriel ended up promising to stop trying
to manipulate Sam and to give him more freedom.
Gabriel knew that if he didn’t, Castiel was going to ask Michael to make Sam
his personal slave. He knew that depending on how Cas worded it to Michael, it
could get granted and he knew that all Castiel had to do is tell Michael that
he wanted to use Sam as a pawn against Dean. Gabriel knew Castiel would never
do that to Dean, but Michael wouldn’t know that.
When Gabriel walked in his house he heard the sound of fighting. He found that
odd so he followed the noise into his formal living room. All the furniture was
pulled out of the way and covered with old sheets. In the middle of the room,
Sam and Dean were sparring. It was quite a sight to see. Both of them were
limber and it appeared Sam had the advantage most of the time. He waited in
silence for them to finish.
Once Sam had Dean pinned to the ground.  Gabriel said calmly, “Hello, Sam.
Hello, Dean.” He watched as they both looked at him and pulled themselves to
their feet. Sam looked timid but more lively than he had been lately. Gabriel
wondered if a few days with Dean did him good or if it was just a few days
without him that did Sam well.
Sam smiled at him and said happily, “Hi Master, I’m glad you’re home. Dean and
I were sparring. Castiel said it was okay.” Sam knew Castiel didn’t
specifically say it was okay, but Castiel did say to obey Dean. So he figured
it still counted as okay. He was pretty pleased with himself.
Despite Gabriel getting shot, Sam had a lot of fun the last few days. Dean had
let him pick out his own clothes to wear and pick what they had to eat for
dinner a couple times. He liked having Dean around. He got to ride around in
the Impala. They went star gazing one night and fell asleep on the hood of the
car. They woke up to Castiel calling Dean frantically to make sure they were
okay and not kidnapped. It was fun. Dean had even let him go downstairs
unsupervised to get snacks for a movie and nothing bad happened.
Dean rolled his eyes and nudged Sam on the side to get his brother to relax. He
said playfully, “How are you feeling? Castiel said the bastard that shot you
had terrible aim. Good thing Sammy didn’t try to shoot you. He is still a
perfect shot.”
Gabriel gave Dean a small smile and wondered why Dean gave Sam a gun, but he
didn’t ask. He knew the hidden message behind what Dean was saying. He knew
Dean was probably at least ten times more pissed about how he was treating Sam
than Castiel, which put him squarely on the Dean Winchester kill list.
Carefully Gabriel said, “I am feeling better. Thank you for your concern and
spending time with Sam, Dean. I appreciated both you and Castiel dropping
everything to come down here. If you don’t mind, I would like to talk to Sam in
private for a few minutes.”
Dean gave Gabriel a critical eye, not fully trusting of him. He hoped Gabriel
wasn’t going to be mean to Sam. But he had no way of knowing. Dean slowly
nodded in acceptance. It wasn’t like he really had a choice in the matter
anyways.
Sam frowned and said quietly, “Of course Master.” He readily walked over to
Gabriel and the pair walked upstairs. Sam was certain that he was in trouble
for taking so many liberties with Dean. He knew the only time he told Dean no
was when Dean wanted him to drink a beer.
++
Gabriel closed the door to their bedroom and leaned his head against the door
of a moment. He could feel Sam’s eyes on him. He turned around to face Sam. He
calmly said, “Castiel has brought to my attention that I have been abusing you
and I want to apologize to you for that. I’m sorry, Sam. I promise I will try
to do better.”
Sam nodded but he didn’t understand. He furrowed his brow as he thought and
after a minute of silence. Sam asked curiously, “I do not know how you abused
me. Are you sure Castiel is right?”
Gabriel sighed and walked over to the bed. He was not used to being on his feet
this long. He laid down but was propped up by a bed of pillows. He was glad to
see that Sam had brought in a couple extra pillows for him so he could make
himself a nice soft nest. After he was comfortable he looked at Sam who was
standing by the other side of the bed.
Regretfully Gabriel said, “Castiel is right. I was abusing you by not giving
you choices and by making you think that you had to submit to me to feel safe.
You are perfectly capable of picking out your own socks and other clothing. I
liked dressing you and dictating how you look because it was like having my own
personal Ken doll and I never stopped to consider what sort of effect it would
have on you.”
Sam was quiet for a moment. Then he said nervously, “I got to pick out my own
clothes for the last few days. I was scared I would displease you at first but
it got easier. Dean and Castiel didn’t mind whatever I picked out.”
Gabriel nodded and closed his eyes. He said calmly, “You’ll get to continue
doing that. I hate clothes shopping but if you want a different style of
clothes I can do that for you. Anything you want, Sam. I have to make this
right.”
Sam tentatively sat down on his side of the bed and looked at Gabriel. He
shrugged slightly and said in a noncommittal tone. “What I have now is fine. My
clothes were always Dean’s hand-me-downs before this.” Sam gave a small laugh
and added, “I don’t think that will work anymore since I am taller than Dean.
I’m just grateful I don’t have to dress like the other slaves.”
Gabriel nodded and kept his eyes closed. He said, “Okay Sam, I’ll take your
word on it but if you change your mind let me know.” He opened his eyes to look
at Sam who looked confused. Calmly he said, “I’m sorry, Sam. I want you to know
you’re safe here and you don’t have to submit to me to be safe.”
Sam let his face drop because he felt rejected. He wondered if Gabriel didn’t
want him anymore. He enjoyed having more freedom with Dean and Castiel, but it
made him feel uneasy at times too. Quietly Sam said, “I don’t understand.”
Gabriel turned his head to look at Sam. He asked carefully, “What is it that
you don’t understand?”
Sam chewed on his lip for a moment and fidgeted with his fingers. He let a
couple tears fall down his face before speaking brokenly, “I don’t understand
why everyone thinks it is bad for me to want to feel safe. Before I put myself
down at your feet I wanted to kill myself. I was so scared all the time of
getting killed, beaten, or raped. I thought it would be better just to end it.”
Sam started to sob and through his tears, he said, “And you don’t want me
anymore. I don’t know what you want from me to show you I deserve to be at your
feet.”
Gabriel listened to Sam’s cries for a moment and he wondered if it would be
better to facilitate Castiel taking Sam. He knew Castiel was right he was
abusing his power and not living up to the terms they set while Sam was
bleeding in his bathtub. Still, he liked Sam and he liked it when Sam submitted
willingly to him. He decided that it really wasn’t his choice on whether Sam
stayed with him or went with Castiel. It should be Sam’s choice. After all, Sam
not having a choice was what Castiel had been complaining about.
Calmly Gabriel said, “Sam come here.” He opened up his arm and felt Sam lay
down next to him. He felt Sam’s head on his uninjured shoulder and he could
hear Sam’s sniffling. Gabriel could feel Sam’s hand clinch on the fabric of his
shirt. He just felt bad for Sam. “I want you, Sam. I’ve wanted you from the
moment I saw your eyes. But you need to have some freedom. I hear you on the
phone sometimes with Dean. You ask him about how it felt to do certain things
and I know you are trying to understand what it feels like to be free.”
Gabriel stopped speaking for a moment so Sam’s crying could die down. He was
casually running a hand up and down Sam’s arm. Once Sam calmed a little bit he
continued, “Instead of helping you to feel free, I’ve taken away your freedom.
I keep you locked away and I don’t allow you to speak to anyone but me. You get
a choice in one thing that we do together once a week and even then I narrowed
it down to three choices.”
Sam sniffled a little and whispered out, “I like it when you make choices for
me because then I know you noticed me and I don’t feel invisible. I feel
attractive when you pick out my clothes and tell me how to keep my body.” Sam
made a small sound of distress and moved himself closer to Gabriel’s side, “I
know you could have a prettier boy but you picked me and I want you to continue
picking me.”
Gabriel looked down at Sam and closed his eyes again. He gripped Sam a little
tighter and said, “There is no one prettier than you, Sam. You’re perfect and
don’t ever let yourself think any different.”
Sam nodded and stated, “But you still don’t want to keep me.”
Gabriel sighed and said carefully, “I want to keep you, Sam. However, that is
not my choice. It is yours. You can either stay here with me and I promise to
give you more choices. I promise to make you feel loved without having to kneel
in front of me. Or we can arrange for your ownership to be transferred from me
to Castiel. If you’re with Castiel you would get to see Dean more and I know
you love your brother.”
Sam buried his head in Gabriel’s shoulder. He didn’t know what he wanted. On
one hand, he liked Gabriel being his master. Sam thought Gabriel was fair and
he genuinely felt better not being in control. He had no idea if it was this
situation or just his nature. He knew he had some freedom. Pastor Jim let him
do whatever he wanted at the church twice a week. It was a nice break from all
of this. However, when he wasn’t with Pastor Jim, Sam liked not having to make
decisions because he didn’t have to fear of making the wrong choice and getting
hurt.
He didn’t know how he felt about the possibility of Castiel being his master
instead. Sam thought Dean might flip out the first time he had to call Castiel
Master which would happen whenever Michael and Lucifer were around. Then what
if Castiel beat him? Gabriel had never beat him. Sam knew Dean had hit him
before out of anger when they were younger and he didn’t know if he would have
to submit to Dean as well as Castiel. Gabriel was fine with him and Dean just
being brothers. Sam knew Gabriel wouldn’t tolerate Dean hitting him out of
anger, but Sam didn’t know if Castiel would tolerate that.
Sam whimpered with overwhelming thoughts of not knowing what to do. He grabbed
on tighter to Gabriel and begged, “Please Master. Please let me stay here. I’ll
be good. I promise. I’ll give you anything you want.”
Gabriel tried to ignore the way, Sam grabbing onto him and begging aroused him.
He wondered what that said about him as a person. Quietly he said, “Shh. Sam,
it’s okay. You have nothing to prove to me. I just wanted to give you the
choice.”
Sam smiled but tears were still falling out of his eyes. Nervously Sam asked,
“If I don’t like the feeling of having more freedom.. or choices. Can I ask
that you take it away?”
Gabriel took a deep breath and said carefully, “Sam, why don’t we start with
small things? Dean and Castiel already got you picking out your own clothes
from the closet. I think we should keep going with that.” Gabriel thought for a
moment, “And, why don’t we make it so you pick what we’re eating for one of our
meals every day?”
Sam was quiet while he processed what Gabriel said. It sounded to him like he
was going to have to make more choices no matter how uneasy it made him. Still,
he had to tell Gabriel the one thing that he doesn’t want to be taken away from
him. “If that is what you wish then it is fine with me, Gabriel. But I want to
ask if it is still okay for me to kneel at your feet when I’m not busy? I feel
good, safe, and loved when I do that and I know it is selfish of me but I don’t
want to give that up.”
Gabriel knew Castiel was going to kill him with what he had to say, but he
couldn’t bring himself to care. “Sam, you are always welcome to kneel at my
feet but you’re also welcome to curl up next me as my equal.”
Sam let out a breath of relief. He still wasn’t happy. He found this
conversation to be emotionally exhausting and he was filled with doubts. Right
now, he just wanted Gabriel to order him to strip and make him kneel while he
got petted. He always felt the best when he was like that and it made him feel
better after a bad day. Sam wondered what Dean would think if he saw that. He
squeezed his eyes shut to try to get the negativity out of his head and he
whimpered.
Gabriel looked at how uneasy Sam was and he was worried that Sam might start to
want to hurt himself again. He closed his eyes and wondered which was worse.
Controlling Sam so Sam felt loved, safe, and content while feeding his own
pleasure. He knew he wasn’t a sadistic ass like his older brothers but he
definitely liked to be in control. Or if, he should not control Sam but still
offer comfort even if he suspected it would lead Sam down a self-destructive
path.
He knew there had to be a balance in this and Sam had chosen to be with him.
Gabriel moved his hand down to the bottom hem of Sam’s shirt. He gently eased
his hand under and started to gently rub Sam’s skin with his fingertips on his
belly and back. Sam keened with the touch and Gabriel could feel Sam trying to
position himself to allow more touching.
Gabriel kissed the top of Sam’s head and said softly, “Go make sure the door is
locked. I don’t want either of our brothers walking in on us. Then take off
your clothes and come back here.”
Sam quickly complied and he felt a whirl of acceptance fill his chest. He
clicked the lock on the door. Then he quickly removed his clothes. He was glad
he kept up his hygiene routine while Gabriel was away. Sam saw Gabriel smile at
him and he felt safe. He quickly got back up on the bed with Gabriel and curled
in next to him.
Gabriel snaked a hand down and gave Sam’s cock a gentle stroke. He leaned over
and kissed Sam gently on the lips even though it hurt to move. He felt Sam
smile into the kiss. Gabriel couldn’t hide the lust in his voice when he asked,
“Did you stroke yourself while I was gone?”
Sam shook his head no as he struggled to keep his hands to himself. He
nervously said, “No, can I.. umm.. touch you? I want to show you how much you
mean to me.”
Gabriel felt his dick get hard in his pants and he had to take a deep breath
from bucking up. He let go of Sam’s cock and nodded in agreement. “Yes, Sam.”
Then Gabriel felt Sam unbuckling his pants and putting his zipper down. As Sam
pulled out his hard cock, Gabriel knew somewhere in his mind that he shouldn’t
be doing this. But it didn’t stop him.
++
Sam was happy to have Gabriel back. He thought it was nice to be able to touch
and hold his master. He didn’t understand why all of a sudden Gabriel wanted to
change things. He liked things the way they were for the most part. Sam did
know sometimes he felt like he was suffocating from all the control, but he
wasn’t scared. He didn’t want to have choices and be afraid.
He knew that the last few days with Dean and Castiel were challenging. They had
forced him to make choices and now Gabriel was going to do the same thing. He
still didn’t understand why Castiel thought Gabriel was abusing him. Sam had
seen the slaves that Michael and Lucifer kept and he knew he was nothing like
them. It made Sam angry that they would think so poorly of Gabriel.
Sam knew he had promised Dean to hold on to who he was before, but he didn’t
really know if he wanted to be that person anymore. It was so confusing to him
and he just didn’t know what to do or who to trust. Sam wished he could talk to
his dad. He knew he had his differences with his father but if his father was
one thing it was honest and right now Sam needed some honesty.
He pulled out a blank postcard from his drawer. This one had a random mix of
candies on it. Sam thought it represented the way his head felt at the moment.
He was lost and confused. Sam flipped over the postcard to write because
despite his feelings. Today, he had something to write about.
“Gabriel is home from the hospital today and he apologized to me because he
thought he was being too controlling. I will miss getting to spend time with
Dean and feeling a little like I used too.”
Sam slipped the postcard back in the drawer. He picked up his family picture
and looked at it. Sam smiled. He was grateful Gabriel let him keep it and that
Dean didn’t take it when he saw it.
 
***** Chapter 21 *****
It was the day after Gabriel got home from the hospital and Gabriel was up in
his bedroom all morning with Sam doing God knows what. Well, Dean had a pretty
good idea what they were doing and it pissed him off. He thought he heard Sam
moan at some point and he decided to just go downstairs. Castiel was speaking
seriously with one of the guards and Dean had honestly never seen Castiel look
so pissed off before.
It was the first time, Dean could say that he ever saw anything that would
indicate Castiel was a Novak. Castiel had that same glimmer in his eyes that
Lucifer got when he was about to torture someone to death on national
television. Dean found it to be a little unnerving. He briefly wondered if he
was better off seeing Castiel like this or listening to Sam moan while Gabriel
molested him. He sighed. He knew he was screwed and he really hated his life
right now.
In the end, Dean decided to stay downstairs with Castiel because he was pretty
sure the crazy killer look was not directed at him. Dean was not all surprised
to find out how quickly the people behind shooting Gabriel were caught. He knew
it was a generalized bad idea to go up against the Novak family. He never got
to see why that was a bad idea first hand until now.
The man who shot Gabriel was a member of the Resistance. The Resistance was a
small group that tried to free slaves and take them to a neutral country.  Dean
had never put much stock into them because he had never heard of them being
successful. He had seen Lucifer and Michael execute plenty of the members of
the Resistance. Dean always turned the TV off whenever Lilith and Eve would
take turns killing the youngest members of the faction.
However, the shooter was already in custody and Dean knew that poor bastard
would be praying for death before the end. It was not the shooter that Castiel
was angry with. It was Gabriel’s newest slave, Gummy Bear. He wondered who was
naming these slaves and he couldn’t help but agree with Sam. At least, Sam
didn’t get renamed something stupid. Dean found out that Gummy Bear had a
tracker inside of him and that was how they figured out Gabe Milton was in fact
Gabriel Novak.
Dean was currently watching as Castiel glared at Gummy Bear and he wondered if
this kid was going to be the first person Cas ever hit. Dean knew he had no
trouble torturing someone for information. He had tortured countless demons in
his day and the fact that this Resistance could have dragged Sam out of this
house which would have resulted in his baby brother getting killed was enough
for Dean to get on board with some torture. That was of course, if Castiel or
Gabriel did not want to do the deed.
Castiel’s voice was low and a near growl when he walked over to Gummy Bear,
“Can you explain to me why you thought it was a good idea to put a tracker in
your arm? Most male slaves die on the first day at the capital, which is a very
public location. You were graced with being one of my brother, Gabriel’s
slaves. In case, you failed to notice he treats them well and for some reason,
I cannot understand, you wanted to bring death upon Gabriel and the other
slaves in this household.”
Gummy Bear to Dean’s amusement did not back down and any trace of passiveness
that he had seen earlier from the slave was gone. He slave bellowed, “I will
not bow down and be a slave. I will work to free them from your family. You and
all your brothers are monsters.”
Castiel nodded as he tried to keep his anger under control. He didn’t want to
get physical with this kid. It just wasn’t in his nature. Mockingly Castiel
said, “Gabriel will decide whether you live or die today. If you have been
raised in the Resistance then you know that the slaves here do not look like
the ones that Michael and Lucifer keep. If you can get Gabriel’s forgiveness,
you will get to see your twenty-first birthday and regain your freedom. If not,
any member of your family that doesn’t get executed will be getting back a box
of ashes.”
Castiel turned and walked out of the room. Dean wondered what was wrong with
him because Castiel had completely turned him on by that. Dean went upstairs
after Castiel and he found Cas outside the study talking with Gabriel. If he
thought Castiel looked angry; he was wrong. Gabriel’s expression made Castiel
look downright passive.
Dean saw Gabriel open the door to the study and his voice was stern. “Sam, I am
going to go downstairs to deal with some business. Do not come downstairs until
either Dean, Castiel, or I come to get you.”
Dean heard Sam’s reply. It sounded to Dean like Sam was happy which from
Gabriel’s tone didn’t make any sense at all to him. He would have expected Sam
to be afraid but his brother wasn't. “Of course, Gabriel. My algebra is giving
me trouble so I need the extra study time to figure this out.”
Gabriel nodded and his tone softened. “Good boy, Sam. If you need help once I
am done. I can help you. I admit math isn’t my strong point but I will do the
best I can.”
Dean internally cringed when Gabriel called Sam a good boy but he kept his
mouth shut. For whatever reason, Sam wanted to stay with Gabriel and not go
with Castiel. Dean figured it was probably the better the devil you know mind
set but he had no idea. He knew he couldn’t really even begin to understand
Sam’s situation.
Dean watched as Gabriel walked past him and gave him small nervous smile.
Castiel was walking behind Gabriel stopped next to Dean. Quietly Castiel said,
“Dean, you may want to stay up here for this.” Dean cocked an eyebrow because
he was curious. “Gabriel is going to let the guards get information out of the
slave. Then Gabriel is probably going to kill him.”
Dean nodded and thought about what his best option would be. If he was nothing
else, he was curious as Hell and he really wanted to see Gabriel’s wrathful
side. Dean knew Sam could be facing that someday. So Dean shrugged and said, “I
would really like to witness it if you don’t mind.”
Castiel nodded in agreement and Dean followed the Novak brothers downstairs.
++
Dean could see Michael when he looked at Gabriel. He could see Michael’s stance
and pose, but this wasn’t Michael. This was Michael’s little brother, Gabriel.
For the first five minutes, Gabriel didn’t speak a word. He just circled around
Gummy Bear and looked at him. It was almost like Gabriel was sizing him up and
it was the most intimidating thing Dean ever saw. Dean thought that was weird
considering Gabriel didn’t even lay a finger on the guy.  
Finally Gabriel spoke and his voice was as cold as ice. Dean had never heard
Gabriel take this tone with Sam and something told him, Sam had never heard or
seen this side of Gabriel. “Gummy Bear, I am disappointed. Not only are you a
member of the Resistance but your little group of idiots can’t even get a good
shot. Now, you are going to explain to me why you had a tracker in your arm and
you are going to give me names of everyone that is involved. Do you know why
you’re going to do this?”
Dean wasn’t sure if Gummy Bear was brave or insanely stupid. He was leaning
towards insanely stupid when the slave spat out, “I won’t tell you anything.”
Gabriel nodded and a small smile crept across his face. He took a step closer
to Gummy Bear and said with hate. “I heard that your girlfriend is pregnant
with your child. What was her name? Millie? It doesn’t matter because unless
you tell me everything you know. I am going to order her and her unborn child
handed over to Lilith.”
Dean wondered what Lilith did with pregnant women but he wasn’t about to ask
questions right now. He was standing off to the side with his mouth shut which
was the way he was going to stay.
Gummy Bear tried to take a step towards Gabriel but was stopped by two guards,
who took a firm hold on each of his arms. The slave growled and said, “Don’t
you dare touch them.”
Gabriel raised an eyebrow and said, “I never said I was going to touch them. I
said Lilith was going to touch them. Now, tell me what I want to know and maybe
someday you can have a nice happy little family with your girlfriend.”
Gummy Bear struggled in the grasps of the guards and said a frantic, “No, I
won’t tell you anything.”
Gabriel nodded and he looked to one of the guards. He said regretfully, “Go
make sure Lollipop is in her private quarters.” Gabriel waited for the guard to
leave and then he turned to the guard standing next to Dean. His voice was
stern, “Beat him.”
Dean watched as the first few punches landed on the slave. They were mostly
aimed for his chest and abdomen. A couple hit the slave’s face and Dean knew
that had to hurt. When the guard stopped and pulled out a flogger that looked
like it had bloodstained fishhooks on the end, he had to look away. Dean
couldn’t help but wonder if the dried blood on that flogger belonged to Sam.
After a few minutes, Dean could see blood splatter on the floor near where he
was standing. He could hear Gummy Bear moaning and Dean wasn’t sure how much
more the slave could take. Dean heard Gabriel speak with a sharp, “Enough.”
Gabriel walked over to the slave who was laying on the floor. His shirt had
been removed and he had cuts and pieces of skin missing along his chest and
back. If Gabriel wasn’t so pissed about this situation he knew he would feel
bad. Sharply he asked, “Are you ready to talk now?”
Dean dared a glance and he was surprised by how much blood and pieces of flesh
were scattered throughout the room. He couldn’t understand how that kid hadn’t
passed out in shock. Dean glanced over at Castiel who had a hardened expression
and despite it being completely messed up, Dean found that hot as Hell.
Dean heard the slave weakly say, “Sure, is this how you beat your bitch into
submission? What was his name? Sam? He’s pathetic.” That pissed Dean off and he
felt his anger flare inside of him. Luckily for Dean, he didn’t have to say
anything.
Gabriel’s voice was smug and he couldn’t hide the smirk. “Okay, I will answer
your question then I expect you to answer mine. I don’t have a bitch and no, I
won’t take you as my bitch.”
By some miracle the slave steadied his breath and said, “My father put the
tracker in my arm when I went into high school. He told me it was in case I
decided to stay out too late with the girls. Only after it was put in did I
find out about his work on the Resistance. They alter the names for the
drawings mostly. They make it so only the poor kids end up with their names in
the bucket.”
Gabriel frowned and said carefully, “That means quite a few people are in on
this. Tell me then, how is it your name got drawn?”
The slave lowered his head, “I was supposed to sacrifice myself so we could
find out where the bodies are cremated. They thought it would be a weak point.”
Gabriel nodded and turned to the guard, “Cage him and make sure he doesn’t have
any more trackers on him. I don’t care if you have to peel his skin off. Clean
this mess up. I don’t want Lollipop or Sam to see this.”
Dean watched in silence as they dragged the kid away and he was angry. The
Resistance who was supposed to free slaves had set Sam up for this because he
was poor. Dean didn’t realize he was fuming mad until he felt Castiel pull on
his arm and say quietly, “Let’s go upstairs, Dean.”
++
Behind the closed doors of the bedroom he shared with Castiel, Dean was pacing.
Castiel was sitting quietly on the bed and was wondering if it was safe to talk
to Dean or if he should just let Dean continue pacing. Castiel knew he had
never been one with words but still he tried. He carefully said, “Gummy Bear is
probably lying, Dean. There is an even mix of socioeconomic classes with the
incoming slaves.”
Dean sighed and stopped pacing. He kept his back turned to Cas when he asked,
“And if he isn’t?”
Castiel shrugged and said calmly, “Nothing good for those involved. If wealthy
families were involved all the members of the family will be executed and their
wealth redistributed in the community. I have heard of this happening one time
before.”
Dean nodded but did not look at Cas. Quietly Dean said, “Yeah, they had another
drawing at the school with only the wealthy children’s names. Then they
executed that kid in front of the school. Some innocent kid getting killed
isn’t going to make up for what happened to Sam and it is not going to set Sam
free.”
Castiel stood and walked up behind Dean. He put his hands on Dean’s shoulders
and he firmly started to rub them. He knew Dean liked that. Cas heard Dean
groan with the touch and he whispered into Dean’s ear, “I don’t want to think
about that. I want to think about what a sexy and handsome boyfriend I have.”
Dean groaned again and he felt himself start to get aroused. Even though Cas
didn’t directly say it, Dean knew this was a distraction and a much needed one
at that. He turned around and kissed Castiel roughly on the lips. He gripped
the sides of Castiel’s face and kissed as they staggered back to the bed.
Dean quickly removed his two shirts as Castiel made short work of his. They
tossed their shirts off to the side and started feverishly kissing and nipping
at each other’s mouths. Then Dean leaned down a little further and started
kissing behind Castiel’s ear and down his neck. Dean ran his hand over
Castiel’s nipples and rolled them gently in his fingertips. He moved back up
and to kiss Castiel’s mouth as he started undoing Castiel’s pants. He slid a
hand in Castiel’s pants and started lightly petting his cock.
Dean grinned as Castiel started to open up Dean’s pants. He whispered
breathlessly, “Do you want to be the top or the bottom?”
Castiel moaned and bucked up into Dean’s hand. He stammered out, “We really
need a schedule or something for that so you quit asking every time. I don’t
care.”
Dean hummed as he leaned up to shed himself of his pants. He had a teasing
glint in his eye when he said, “You don’t care how we fuck in your brother’s
house? In that case, I want to fuck you into the mattress.”
Castiel pulled off his pants and boxers as he spread his legs so Dean could get
in between him. He groaned and said, “Okay Dean, but no more talking about our
brothers.”
Dean chuckled as he went back to kissing Castiel. He reached over and pulled
the bottle of lube off the nightstand. Then he sunk down further on the bed and
started kissing around Castiel’s groin as a lubed finger came up to massage his
asshole. As the skin soften under his touch, Dean leaned down further and
sucked one of Castiel’s balls into his mouth while he slowly inserted a finger.
He slowly worked and wiggled the finger until it was all the way in. He didn’t
let up on sucking Castiel’s balls the whole time.
He continued to wiggle the finger around as he pulled up from Castiel. Dean
grinned and asked, “Do you need a cock ring? Because I want to start sucking
you off and I doubt you want to come before I fuck you.”
Castiel groaned and flopped his hand down on the nightstand. He moved his hand
around for a few moments until he found the treasured cock ring. He hastily
threw it Dean’s direction. Castiel groaned as he felt Dean lock in place. Then
he felt Dean start to lick the underside of his cock as a second finger started
to enter his ass. Dean sucked on just the head of Castiel’s cock as he started
to scissor his fingers inside Castiel.
When he heard Castiel groan, he started licking up and down his cock. Then Dean
got a mischievous grin and he aimed his fingers inside Castiel to hit his
prostate. Cas bucked his hips into Dean’s face and Dean had to use his other
hand to hold Castiel’s hip down. He figured that getting a black eye from his
boyfriend’s cock would not only be embarrassing but hard to explain.
Dean continued to rub Castiel’s prostate as he took Castiel’s cock back in his
mouth. This time he took Castiel all the way down which made his eyes water a
little. He started bobbing his head up and down in earnest as he eased a third
finger into Cas. He could feel Castiel shaking under him and Dean was actually
impressed that Cas hadn’t started begging to get fucked yet.
However, Dean knew this was a game they played and if Castiel wanted to lay
around and whither, he could wait him out. He continued to deep throat
Castiel’s cock as he opened Castiel up on three fingers and brushed
relentlessly against his prostate. Dean wasn’t sure how long it went on but
eventually, Castiel’s self-control started to waiver.
Castiel tried to buck his hips again and failed because Dean was holding him in
place. He groaned in discontent. He wanted to come and he needed to. He was on
edge and Castiel knew that Dean knew it. Castiel threw his head back in defeat
as he was the first to break. “Dean, please fuck me.” He moaned loudly when
Dean pulled off of his cock. Then he watched with lust filled eyes as Dean
pulled his fingers out and started to lube up his cock.
Dean leaned down and kissed Castiel as he started to slide in. He groaned
loudly at the sensation. Castiel was so tight and warm. Dean was certain this
is what Heaven felt like. He started to slowly rock his hips, just to agitate
Castiel. He smirked when he saw a look of frustration on the man’s face. Dean
leaned down and kissed Cas as he started to thrust harder and faster. He could
hear the headboard thumping against the wall as he moved in and out of Castiel.
It didn’t take long before Dean was reaching down and clicking off the cock
ring on Castiel. He started to stroke Castiel as he fucked into him. Dean came
first inside Castiel with a loud moan. Castiel came next with an incoherent,
“Oh Dean.”
Then Dean collapsed on top of Castiel for a moment before rolling over and
pulling out. Dean chuckled and said playing, “I knew you were going to beg
before I got tired of sucking your cock or couldn’t hold out.”
Castiel groaned and back teasingly, “I will get you back next time.”
Dean looked over at Cas and quirked an eyebrow, “In an hour?”
Castiel shook his head and closed his eyes, “No way, I need more recovery time
than that.”
++
About an hour later Dean was dressed and he figured he looked presentable, he
wandered out into the hallway. He saw Sam step out tentatively into the hallway
and tilt his head to the side. Dean knew Sam was going to say something and
honestly, he was hoping Sam it would tease the fuck out of him. However, Dean
was sadly disappointed.
Sam’s voice was quiet and laced with worry, “Were you hurting Castiel? I heard
noises and banging. Is he okay?” It hurt Dean inside when Sam wouldn’t even
look at him when he spoke. He wondered what Sam had witnessed or heard to make
him think that.
Carefully with all the reassurance in his voice he could muster, “Sammy, we
were just having sex. We got a little loud and I am sorry for that. I didn’t
hurt Cas and he wasn’t in pain or doing anything against his will at any time.”
He paused to see Sam nodding his head but Sam wouldn’t lift his head to see
him. Cheerfully Dean added, “You can go ask him if you want.”
Sam frowned but he didn’t look up. He whispered out. “I’m sorry, Dean. It was
just the noises and the sounds from that.” Sam vigorously shook his head and
wrapped his arms around himself. “I don’t like it. It scares me.”
Dean felt his protective nature rear up. He put his arms on Sam and pulled him
into a hug. He felt Sam shake in his arms and he realized his overzealous
fucking caused Sam to freak out. But the questions was, why? Slowly, Dean slid
them down to the floor so he was sitting down on the ground holding on to Sam
as Sam sniffled and tried to hold back the tears.
Carefully Dean asked, “Did Gabriel do something to you?”
Sam huffed out and said quietly, “No, Gabriel stopped them.” Sam didn’t say
anything else and Dean was certain he just died a little inside. He wanted to
ask what exactly it was Gabriel stopped, but by the way Sam was sobbing in his
arms. He couldn’t get the words to leave his mouth. Instead, he just held his
little brother and let him cry.
Eventually, Sam cried himself to sleep. Dean had Castiel help move Sam into the
bed he shared with Gabriel. Once Sam was settled in bed, Gabriel gently pulled
the blanket up over Sam and gently stroked his hair. Dean was actually
surprised at how almost reverently Gabriel touched Sam. He wasn’t expecting
that.
Dean wandered back to the room he shared with Castiel. Now he felt guilty about
fucking Cas into the mattress and he wondered what sort of abuse Sam had
suffered. Dean knew he had seen Sam’s scars or at least some of them. He knew
the scars only told part of the story. He didn’t know Sam’s fear. He didn’t
know what they wanted or why.
Castiel spoke from the doorway, “You look worried, Dean.”
Dean frowned down at his hands and said sheepishly, “Yeah, I had sex and my
little brother heard. Instead of him telling me I was gross or an asshole. He
freaked out and had a meltdown because he thought about when he got hurt. I
don’t even know how he got hurt. I feel like I failed to protect him, again.”
Castiel sat down next to Dean on the bed. He calmly said, “Dean, Sam doesn’t
like to talk about it for obvious reasons. But both of he times he was beaten,
the guards threatened to rape him. The second time, Sam had to witness them
gang raping another slave. They tried to force him to have sex with her. When
he refused they beat him. Gabriel walked in when they were using a flogger
similar to the one they used today on Sam’s back.”
Castiel paused and never one of tack added, “Actually that might be the same
flogger. Gabriel was furious that they laid a hand on Sam. You’ve seen what Sam
back looks likes now, so I don’t have to tell you what it looked like. ”
Dean breathed out a hitched, “Jesus, Sammy had to of been terrified.”
Castiel shrugged, “I would assume so. I wasn’t here to witness it. I do know
Gabriel stayed with Sam the entire time and comforted him as best he could. I
wish I knew at the time the young man I was tutoring was his brother.” Castiel
paused, “I would have taken you to see him.”
Dean nodded and gave a sad smile, “I know, Cas. But I am here now and we can’t
change the past.”
Dean sighed. He reached in his duffel and pulled out Sam’s box of postcards. He
needed something else to think about. Dean opened the box of postcards and
flipped through them. He stopped when he found one that looked like it had
dried blood on it. The card itself was vintage picture of a woman in a bathing
suit. He flipped over the card to see what Sam wrote.
“I kissed a girl for the first time today and it felt great but I got
interrupted by Dean who had gotten in a fight. I will miss feeling her lips on
mine.”
Dean smiled down at the card when he realized the blood was probably his and
not Sam’s. It made Dean miss the days when Sam thought all there was to life
was kissing girls while trying not to get caught. Dean wondered if Sam would
ever get to kiss a girl again.   
***** Chapter 22 *****
Sam was nervous because today was his eighteenth birthday. He was doing better
with remembering the day now that Gabriel made a big about it every year. It
was different and Sam wished Dean could be here, but Dean had class. Sam was
proud of Dean. His big brother only had one more semester and then he would
have a Bachelors degree. He wondered if Gabriel would let him go to the
ceremony. Sam figured Gabriel wouldn’t but he was thinking about asking at some
point.
He was currently in their room staring at his clothes. He had gotten used to
picking out his own outfit but it still made him uneasy sometimes. Gabriel had
told him to pick a shirt that covered his collar. Sam didn’t really understand
why Gabriel would want that but he was happy to obey.
He chose a blue button down shirt because Gabriel had told him it brought out
his eyes. Sam slipped on one of his newer pairs of jeans over his boxers. Then
he put on his socks and finally he slipped on his shoes. Sam’s shoes remind him
of something that would be found in a retirement home or a mental hospital, but
they are what Gabriel gave him so he doesn’t complain. Sam knows that the other
slaves don’t have shoes and even though Gabriel told him to ask if he wants
something more. Sam just can’t do it.
Once he is dressed he checked himself in the mirror to make sure he looked
alright. Sam tucked his hair behind his ears and frowned. He could never
understand why Gabriel thought he was perfect or attractive. Sam started
fidgeting with the sleeves on his shirt when Gabriel walked.
Gabriel leaned against the wall and asked calmly, “How is my favorite birthday
boy?”
Sam stopped fidgeting and put his arms down to his side. He smiled at his
master. Then he looked down at his feet and said nervously, “Good. May I ask
why you are having me dress up?”
Gabriel grinned and walked over to Sam. He stood behind Sam in the mirror. He
wrapped his arms around Sam’s waist and poked his head out to the side of Sam’s
shoulder. He happily said, “Tonight, we are going out to eat in town. Italian
or Mexican?”
Sam thought for a moment. He remembered going to fast food Mexican restaurants
when he was free. He had never been to an Italian restaurant unless it was a
pizza place. Sam wasn’t sure if Gabriel wanted to take him someplace to eat
tacos or someplace to eat spaghetti. Both of which sounded odd to Sam because
he could cook that at home. It was one of his tasks to prepare Gabriel’s food
and that made him happy. Sam wasn’t sure why Gabriel didn’t want Sam to make
dinner tonight.
Tentatively Sam said, “Oh, am I not cooking something to your satisfaction? I
can do better.”
Sam started fidgeting with his hands and Gabriel put his hand over Sam’s to
stop the younger man. Calmly Gabriel said, “Sam, when a free person has a
birthday. Sometimes they like to go out for dinner to get wined and dined. It
is not a reflection on your excellent cooking. Would you rather stay in?”
Sam thought for a moment. He was genuinely curious what free people who weren’t
poor and starving did on their birthdays. So if they went out to dinner then
Sam figured he could do that. Nervously Sam said, “No, I want to try to go
out.”
Gabriel grinned and kissed the side of Sam’s arm. He happily said, “Great.
Italian or Mexican?”
Sam frowned and he wasn’t sure what the right answer was. He turned and ducked
his head away from Gabriel. He quietly said, “I don’t really know. I’ve never
been to a real Italian restaurant and I’ve only ever had fast food Mexican.”
Gabriel was quiet for a moment then he said helpfully, “How about we do
Mexican? I think the menu items will be more familiar to you. I don’t want to
overly stress you on your birthday.”
Sam nodded in agreement and said, “Thank you, Gabriel.”
++
Sam wasn’t sure what to make of the restaurant. It was nice. Well, it was nicer
than any place he had ever been. There were lots of people in the lobby waiting
to be seated and it had been a long time since Sam was that close to other
people. He could feel their shoulders unintentionally brushing up against his
and it made him uneasy.
He hadn’t been around this many people, this close to each other since he was
dragged out of a cage after his name was drawn. Sam frowned when he realized
that most of the people who became a slave at the same time of him are dead.
Sam figured Gabriel must have figured out he was uncomfortable because Gabriel
led him over to a corner and sat him down.
Gabriel sat down next to Sam and put a reassuring hand on Sam’s leg. He gently
asked, “Is it too loud?”
Sam looked at Gabriel and he listened for the first time to the conversations
around him. There were people talking about their kids, soccer practice, work,
and hobbies. Sam laughed awkwardly. He hadn’t heard so many different
conversations in one place since he was in school. Sam bit down on his lip and
stopped laughing then he looked up at Gabriel.
Gabriel sighed and gently squeezed Sam’s leg. He leaned in a little closer to
Sam’s ear since he thought maybe Sam didn’t hear him. Then he asked a firmly,
“Sam, is it too loud in here?”
Sam shook his head no and looked at Gabriel. He felt okay even though he was
uneasy with the proximity of other people. He quietly said, “No Master.”
Gabriel smiled and said calmly, “You can call me Gabe or Gabriel, Sam. It’s
okay.”
Sam nodded and nervously said, “Okay Gabriel.” He leaned his head down on
Gabriel’s shoulder and listened to the conversations around him. It wasn’t like
Sam had a real vested interest in ease dropping. It had just been so long since
he had been around so many different people talking about different things. It
was sort of bitter sweet for Sam because he remembered what it felt like to
hear this sort of thing but he realized all the conversations he missed because
he was locked away by his master.
When the hostess came to show them to their seats. It was a new experience for
Sam. He had been to many diners in his life but this wasn’t like any diner he
had ever been too. It was clean. The room was decorated in warm greens, reds,
and golds. Sam could see sombreros in various places throughout the restaurant.
Their table was off to the side but still Sam was surrounded by other tables
and other people. It was a lot to take in.
The hostess sat a menu down in front of him and another in front of Gabriel,
who was sitting across from Sam. After the hostess left, Sam stared at the menu
blankly. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d ordered off of a menu. He knew
it was before he was a slave. Sam felt fear creep up his spine because he
wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do.
Gabriel smiled at Sam and leaned forward on the table so Sam could hear him
better. “Sam, you can order whatever you want.” Gabriel watched Sam nod and
carefully open his menu. He could see that Sam’s worry was increasing. He
wasn’t sure if it was just the new situation, to many choices, or both. He
decided for better or for worse he was going to take control of the situation.
The last thing Gabriel wanted was for Sam to panic on what is supposed to be
his birthday dinner because everything was so new to him.
The waitress stopped by a minute later. She was a perky brunette that Gabriel
guessed was about the same age as Sam. She happily said, “What can I get you
boys to drink?”
Gabriel caught the look of fear in Sam’s eyes with the question. He gave Sam a
reassuring smile and said calmly, “I will take a sweet tea and Sam will have an
unsweetened tea. No lemon.” Gabriel watched as Sam visibly relaxed. He grinned
at Sam as the waitress wandered off. Sam was still not doing well with making
choices. He knew Sam would prefer not to make choices so it was always a
difficult balance for him.
Sam studied the menu carefully and he realized he had no idea what he was
looking at. He knew what the food items were for the most part. He knew what
enchiladas, tacos, and burritos were but inside each of those menu options were
more choices. Sam had no idea what Gabriel wanted him to pick and Sam guessed
there were about a hundred choices with all the different possible
combinations.
He started fidgeting with his hands when he realized he didn’t know what to do.
This wasn’t like ordering food at a diner. This was harder, so much harder. Sam
wanted to ask Gabriel to order for him, but the words dried up on his tongue.
Luckily for Sam, Gabriel knew there was a problem.
Calmly Gabriel asked, “Sam, do you need help figuring out what to order?”
Sam winced at that coming out of Gabriel’s mouth. The very idea that he could
give an order for anything didn’t make sense to Sam. Sam was a slave he
followed orders. He didn’t give the orders. Still Sam could really use the
help, so he readily nodded in agreement.
Gabriel smiled and said calmly, “Do you want a salad or something more
filling?”
Sam scrunched up his brow at Gabriel. He didn’t understand. Sam lowered his
head and was ashamed, “I don’t understand this. Can you just order for me?”
 Gabriel frowned and said clearly, “Yes, I can order for you if that would make
you feel more comfortable.” Sam nodded eagerly and Gabriel felt a little bad.
This was his idea to take Sam out like this and Sam was not doing well. He
reminded himself that Sam had never been out with him like this in their time
together and he doubted Sam ever went out to eat someplace this nice before.
When the waitress came back with their drinks she put down a plate of chips and
salsa before taking their orders. Gabriel ordered Sam a fajita salad and he
ordered himself a combination platter. He noticed that Sam seemed to relax a
little more once the choices were made, but now Sam was staring at the chips
and salsa like it might bite him.
Gabriel picked up a chip and ate it as he watched Sam. He knew Sam was watching
him carefully, part of Gabriel wondered if Sam was looking to him to figure out
what to do. He dipped a chip in some salsa and he held it out for Sam. Calmly
he said, “Here, try this and let me know what you think.” He watched as Sam
tentatively took the chip and put it in his mouth. Gabriel watched Sam chew
slowly and he couldn’t quite make out what Sam was thinking.
Sam wasn’t sure how he felt about eating in such a public setting. He had eaten
in front of guards, Castiel, Dean, and Gabriel over the last four years but no
one else. He wasn’t quite sure how he was supposed to behave. Gabriel didn’t
tell him that there were any expectations on his behavior or how much liberty
he could take. Sam carefully said, “I’m not sure what I am allowed to do. I
don’t want to displease you.”
Gabriel looked at Sam carefully for a moment. He realized that this may be too
much for Sam to handle. Calmly Gabriel said, “Relax Sam. Eat some chips and
salsa, drink your tea. It’s okay.”
Sam nodded and stared at the chips with trepidation. He knew that Gabriel never
allowed him to snack before meals and that was what this was, Sam thought. He
didn’t understand and he didn’t know how many chips constituted as some chips.
Sam didn’t want to eat too many and upset Gabriel. He didn’t want to lose this
privilege. Nervously Sam said, “How many chips can I eat? You’ve never allowed
this before so I don’t understand. I’m sorry, Gabriel.” Sam ducked his head so
he wouldn’t have to see the look of disappointment on Gabriel’s face.
Gabriel reached a hand under the table and put it on Sam’s knee. He gently
rubbed his thumb over it for a few moments while he watched Sam relax. Then he
said calmly, “Hey kiddo, it’s okay. You can eat as many as you want.” He picked
up another chip and dipped it in some salsa. Then he handed it to Sam. He
watched as Sam tentatively accepted the chip and ate it. Gabriel thought Sam
still looked unsure but it was progress.
Sam was very uneasy about this so he checked with Gabriel visually each time
before he ate anything. This was stressful to him and he didn’t enjoy this part
of getting to go out. Sam was relieved when their food arrived but he was
surprised by the portion size. He knew it was more than he could eat especially
with snacking already. Sam closed his eyes and took a couple deep breaths to
calm himself. He was getting frightened.
He nervously started to eat his salad after Gabriel started eating. Sam made it
about half way through the salad before he felt full. He shifted in his seat
uncomfortably and saw that Gabriel was slowing down on eating as well.
Nervously Sam asked, “Is it okay if I don’t finish this? I am full. Please,
Gabriel.”
Gabriel smiled and said confidently, “You ate enough, Sam. Don’t worry, you’re
not in trouble.”
Sam started to zone out while Gabriel finished eating. He found that sometimes
zoning was easier than staying in the present. Sam missed it when their plates
were taken away and sopapillas were put in front of them. Then Sam heard
clapping so he turned his head to look. He saw a few members of the staff doing
a happy birthday chant in front of him and Gabriel had a huge grin on his face.
Sam had no idea what was going on or why they were doing this. He realized he
was probably slow on the uptake when he figured out they were doing this weird
birthday chant for him. They all told him happy birthday after they chanted
before wandering way.
Sam sat there stunned until Gabriel said joyfully, “The look on your face was
priceless.”
Sam frowned and said calmly, “I don’t understand that. Is it okay that I don’t
understand?”
Gabriel sighed and leaned forward. He replied, “I need to let you out of the
house more. That was supposed to embarrass you because they were singing happy
birthday to you in front of all these people you don’t know. But we have plenty
of years ahead of us for me to try to embarrass you. Now how about we eat our
sopapillas?”
Sam looked down at the sopapilla for the first time and poked at it. He watched
Gabriel cover his with honey. Then Gabriel handed the honey to Sam. Sam
frowned. He had never had a sopapilla before so he had no real idea what he was
supposed to do. Sam knew he wasn’t allowed sugary food like Gabriel so he was
unsure how much honey to put on it.
Gabriel took the honey back from Sam after he saw Sam’s hesitation. He put a
small amount of honey on top of the sopapilla. Then Sam picked it up and took a
bite. Sam didn’t understand this dessert. It was basically a sugared piece of
fried bread with honey on it. Sam thought it was too sweet and he got honey on
his hands. He was thankful Gabriel excused him to go to the restroom.
++
Sam wandered into the men’s room and started washing his hands at the sink when
someone came up to him. It was an older man Sam didn’t recognize. The man’s
voice was hushed but it had an edge to it. “Your name is Sam, right?” Sam
didn’t say anything because he wasn’t given permission to speak to this person.
He continued washing his hands wishing the sticky feeling from the honey would
go away so he could leave.
The man continued talking after a moment of silence, “That man you’re with,
it’s Gabriel Novak and I know you’re his slave. If you come with me right now,
I can take you someplace safe where you won’t have to be a slave anymore. You
can be free.”
Sam listened to what the man said and he was annoyed. He knew he had to tell
Gabriel about this and there was no way Gabriel would let him have this
privilege again. Sam refused to speak to this man, who looked to have no
intention of leaving. He quickly finished washing his hands and dried them off.
Then Sam walked out of the restroom back to Gabriel.
He sat down and lowered his head. Quietly Sam said, “There is an older man in
the Resistance in the men’s restroom. He wanted to take me away from you.”
Gabriel nodded and motioned for one of his undercover guards to check it out.
He turned his attention back to Sam. He smiled and asked, “What did you say?”
Sam looked at Gabriel with pleading eyes, “Nothing, Master. I would never leave
you.”
Gabriel hummed for a moment then he said, “Good boy. What do you say we get out
of here?”
++
Sam was more than grateful they went home after that. He enjoyed the rest of
the evening. Gabriel had him strip down. They watched a movie together with Sam
curled up on the floor next to where Gabriel was sitting. Sam leaned his head
against Gabriel’s knee and enjoyed Gabriel’s light pets throughout the movie.
He felt safe, loved, and cherished like this. Sam was grateful Gabriel let him
have this attention. Especially after everything that happened at the
restaurant.
After the movie, Sam sat down on his side of the bed and he pulled out the
postcard Gabriel bought him from the restaurant. Sam had no idea restaurants
had their own postcards. This one had a picture of an employee making tortillas
on it. He mused for a moment about what Dean would say about that. He figured
Dean would say that the restaurant had an ego issue or something to that
effect. He smiled softly and flipped over the card to write something. He knew
he was going to break his two sentence rule again.
“For the first time in my life, I got to go out to a fancy dinner like free
people. It was scary and fun. I hope Gabriel lets me have this privilege again.
I will miss getting to experience what it is like to be free.”
Sam tucked the postcard in his drawer. He turned back to Gabriel, who was
watching him silently. Sam ducked his head slightly and said nervously, “Thank
you for today, Gabriel.”
Gabriel smiled and reached out a hand. He ran it gently down Sam’s side. He
calmly said, “You’re welcome, Sam. You were very well behaved and obedient that
pleases me.”
Sam nodded and fidgeted. He moved a little closer to Gabriel because he liked
the touch. He said with some hesitation, “I feel bad for the Resistance finding
us. I want to make it up to you. I want to please you and show you I’m yours.”
Gabriel gave a light pull on Sam’s collar and pulled the boy closer. He kissed
Sam on the lips a little rougher than normal. He was feeling a little
possessive tonight. Gabriel knew full well, if Sam thought he was being treated
poorly Sam may have went with the Resistance. Instead, Sam showed loyalty
towards him and that pleased him greatly. He decided that he might as well use
this to his advantage. He said lowly to Sam, “You can suck my dick. That always
makes me happy.”
Sam smiled and said happily, “Yes, Gabriel.” Then he quickly moved to comply
with his master’s order. Sam wanted forgiveness and he would do anything it
took to get that. 
***** Chapter 23 *****
Dean has had a lot of bad plans in his life and this one happened to be one of
the worst. Under normal circumstances, it wouldn’t be a big deal. It would be
headache worthy and annoying but certainly not a big deal. He knew that Castiel
waited until he was somewhere between drunk and sober to ask him for a reason.
Dean was currently in a car with a driver no less on their way to meet
Castiel’s family. Much to Dean’s dismay this wasn’t a visit to Gabriel. This
was a visit with Michael and Lucifer the day before the new slaves arrive.
Apparently, there was a family dinner the night before they get a new lot of
slaves. Dean was less than thrilled about this. He’s having dinner with
powerful, sadistic, murderous, dick bags with his boyfriend.
Dean thinks he would rather eat nails. As if meeting, the family wasn’t bad
enough. Castiel decided that Dean needed to look more put together. So Castiel
took him shopping and instead of wearing his nice comfortable layers of shirts
with a flannel, jeans, and boots. He was dressed like a yuppie. He has to wear
dress shoes, slacks, and a button down shirt. Worst of all, Castiel is making
him wear a tie. It’s not that he has anything against ties. It was just he
would rather not wear something that says ‘strangle me’ in front of Michael and
Lucifer.
He debated about not going through with this and staying home. But Castiel
pouted and he gave in. Dean couldn’t help but feel like Sam somehow, by being
told what to wear. He knew Sam probably never bitched and moaned about it like
he did. Something told him Sam was just glad to have clothes. Dean couldn’t
wrap his head around what that might feel like. He knew he didn’t like the
feeling of playing dress up with Castiel, but he also knew he got to home after
this visit and wear whatever he pleased. Sam didn’t have that.
Dean was pulled from his internal grumbling when they pulled up to the Novak’s
palace. He had seen it on TV before but up close it was amazing. It was really
a stunning building and if Dean didn’t know it was the sight of countless
murders, torture, and probably rapes. He might be excited to stay here. As it
was, Dean packed two five pound boxes of salt to keep any pissed off spirits
out of their room. Castiel had told him not to worry about spirits because the
place was warded. However, Dean figured it is better to be safe than sorry.
For some reason, Dean was surprised when a girl opened the door to their car to
let them out. He had seen Gabriel’s slaves before and this girl looked nothing
like them. Her blue-grey dress was tattered and dirty. Well, she was dirty in
general. Her hair looked like someone took a weed eater to it. Her eyes just
looked a little dead to Dean, like she was doing the motions but no one was
home. Dean could see bruises on her knees and arms. He guessed there were
probably more marks under her clothes. Seeing the slave made him feel uneasy,
because that could have been Sam. Gabriel stopped Sam from becoming like that.
He followed Castiel out of the car and walked into the foyer of the palace. It
looked like somebody robbed a diamond shop. There were diamonds and gold
everywhere. It was a little gaudy for Dean’s tastes, but he knew the point was
to show wealth. Castiel didn’t say anything. Dean just followed Cas down a long
hallway to a door. Castiel pulled a key out of his pocket and unlocked it.
Dean stepped in the room behind Castiel and realized it was a small apartment.
The walls were painted in earth tones and there were paintings on the walls.
Dean thought it looked like abstract art or something. He took a step closer to
one of the paintings and thought that maybe a kid did the painting.
Castiel smiled at Dean as he placed his bag down. He nervously said, “This is
my private quarters. I painted those paintings when I was a kid.”
Dean turned and cocked an eyebrow at Castiel. He was genuinely fascinated by
this. “Dude, you never told me that you painted.”
Castiel gave an uneasy smile and said nervously, “I don’t much anymore. It was
part of a therapy program I had growing up. I didn’t talk for much of my
childhood and I never liked to interact with other children. I always feared my
brothers would kill my friends, so I just didn’t make friends. I started
painting to make me feel like I am supposed to be part of this world.”
Dean grimaced, “I’m sorry, Cas. Sometimes, I forget you had to grow up around
this.”
Castiel put a hand on Dean’s back and smiled, “You don’t have any reason to be
sorry. I don’t like to come here so I keep my paintings on the wall to remind
me that there is a world out there. A world that I am a part of. I know it may
sound like chick flick to you, but it is very important to me.”
Dean shook his head and said calmly, “Cas, it’s fine. I respect what you’ve
done here. I admire it. It’s like seeing little glimpses of you at different
points in my life. I suppose it is like when I read Sam’s postcards.”
Castiel nodded and said, “Perhaps, but we need to get ready for dinner.” Cas
paused and was clearly nervous, “Gabriel will be at dinner. I do not know if he
will have Sam with him. In past years, he has left Sam in his private
quarters.”
Dean shrugged and didn’t understand the big deal, “Um okay, what does it matter
if Sammy is with him or not?”
Castiel sighed, “Dean, if Gabriel takes Sam to dinner with him. Sam will likely
be lead around on a leash and told to kneel at Gabriel’s feet. He will refer to
Gabriel as Master, which you have heard. He will refer to everyone else,
including you, as Sir. It is something you need to be prepared for since I have
a feeling Michael may ask Gabriel to bring Sam to gain a reaction from you.”
Dean closed his eyes to steady himself and calm himself. After a couple
soothing breaths, he clapped his hands and said, “Okay, I am going to need some
painkillers before I deal with this and I am going to need liquor for when this
evening is done.”
 ++
Dean let Castiel primp him to his heart’s content. He kept his mouth shut as
not to complain about it. He was wanting to hold this one point of aggravation
in so maybe just maybe he could focus on this and not whatever happened at
dinner.
Castiel led Dean down to the dining room. It was a large room with an equally
large oak table and chairs. The colors of the room were a rich blue and brown.
Dean thought it looked very manly for a dining room and he could respect that.
Michael and Lucifer were chatting in one corner of the room with Gabriel. Sure
enough, Gabriel had Sam with him on a leash kneeling at his feet. Sam wasn’t
even really dressed in Dean’s opinion. He was wearing what looked like little
black shorts that only went down an inch or two past his ass. Sam’s head was
down and Dean knew Sam was staring at Gabriel’s feet. He could tell by Sam’s
body language that Sam was focused solely on Gabriel. Dean figured that was a
good thing considering, he would rather slit his own wrists than be forced to
do what Sam was doing.
Dean surveyed the rest of the room. He saw Lilith and Eve at the other side of
the room chatting and in person, Dean could see the marks on their flesh from
when they were slaves. He could see where a whip or a knife broke their skin
and scarred them forever. If they weren’t evil sadistic bitches, Dean figured
he would feel sorry for them.
As Castiel led Dean over to Michael, Lucifer and Gabriel. Dean saw something he
didn’t see before. There were two slaves on either side of the table. They were
female and naked. They were also beat to hell. Dean noticed that their collars
looked different than the one on the girl who opened the car door and the
general slaves at Gabriel’s house. Their collars looked similar to Sam’s
collar.
All too soon, Dean heard Castiel say nervously, “Michael, Lucifer.. I would
like you meet my boyfriend, Dean.”
Dean put his best cheesy smile on his face and held out his hand for them to
shake. Lucifer touched his hand first. Lucifer’s hand was as cold as ice as he
firmly shook Dean’s hand. Dean made the mistake of looking Lucifer in the eyes
and he saw a crazy twinkle in his eyes. Lucifer sounded disappointed when he
spoke, “You would have made a pretty slave. It is a shame your name didn’t get
drawn I think I would have had fun with those lips.”
Dean for the life of him could not come up with anything to say that wouldn’t
result in possible execution. So he kept his mouth shut which proved to be the
wrong thing to do. Michael chimed in next. “Castiel, he is cute. Look at the
way he looks away from us. It’s charming. I bet he bows down nicely just like
little brother.”
Castiel sighed and said firmly, “Dean is not one of your chew toys.”
Michael chuckled and said, “His brother is.” Michael put out a hand which he
ran through Sam’s hair.
Dean looked up at Gabriel and saw Gabriel’s jaw twitch. It was pretty clear to
Dean that Gabriel did not like Michael touching Sam and Sam made no effort to
either move away or move into what Michael was doing. Gabriel let Michael pet
Sam for a couple moments before batting his brother’s hand away. Dean was
relieved to see that.
He was not so relieved with what Gabriel said. Gabriel’s voice was casual,
“Brother, this one is my chew toy, not yours. He is quite fun, but as you know,
I don’t like to share my toys.”  Gabriel then ran a hand through Sam’s hair to
the base of Sam’s neck. Gabriel let his hand rest on Sam’s neck. It looked very
controlling to Dean and he didn’t like it.
Lilith’s voice broke through the tension. Her voice was smug and jaded,
“Gentlemen, why don’t we eat and you can argue about who gets to beat the slave
later?”
Gabriel got a look of distain and he said, “That sounds fine, but no one is
going to beat my toy. I’ve spent far too long training him to let one of you
idiots screw that up. Besides, everyone but Castiel has their own slave to
enjoy.”
Everyone quickly sat down to eat. Dean noted that Sam was kneeling on the floor
next to Gabriel and Gabriel was hand feeding him. So far Sam had not spoken a
word or looked at anyone in the room. Dean wondered what was going through
Sam’s head. He guessed that Sam at least partly checked out for this. He knew
he would want to check out for this if he was in Sam’s position. Dean was
pleased that the Novaks ate in silence. It was an awkward silence but silence
was better than talking.
Then Michael had to go ruin that. Michael asked curiously, “So Dean, Castiel
tells me you are going to college and you’re almost done. What are your plans
for after college?”
Dean swallowed and it took him a moment to find his voice. Then he nervously
said, “I…I am hoping to get a job in the automotive industry. I don’t know how
well that will work out since Cas will be in grad school. I want to stay close
to him.”
Michael hummed for a moment then he stated bluntly, “That sounds very
ordinary.” He paused asked, “Tell me Dean, how does it feels to see your little
brother as a groveling slave? You know, Gabriel has a much different approach
to breaking a slave than Lucifer or myself. But I must say I am impressed with
the results. Sam is much more obedient than any of my previous slaves. I heard
he just bends right over for Gabriel.” After Michael finished speaking he
smirked at Dean.
Dean clinched his fists and cleared his throat a couple times. He looked at Cas
who had a horrified expression. Then to Gabriel who just gave him a look of
encouragement. Nervously and carefully Dean said, “I’ll be honest. I don’t like
it and if there was any legal way for Sammy to get out of this I would jump on
it. But I know there isn’t a way out of this for Sammy. So I am just grateful
Gabriel treats him well. Broken slave or not, he’s still my brother and I will
love him no matter what.”
Lucifer chuckled and said playfully, “Michael and I were talking earlier today.
We decided to throw you a bone, Deano.” He grinned then gave a slight laugh,
“If you bend your brother over and fuck him. Then we will set him free today.
You can take him home alive and only slightly scarred.”
Gabriel spoke first with a harsh, “Absolutely not.” Dean saw one of Gabriel’s
hands tighten around Sam’s neck. He was momentary worried Gabriel was hurting
Sam, but then Dean realized it was just a possessive hold.
Michael made a tsk at Gabriel as he shook his finger. He mockingly said, “Now,
now, Gabriel no need to get upset. You can get a new slave tomorrow.”
Dean was still working on finding his voice. Castiel spoke for Dean. Castiel’s
voice was firm. “I think the slave should choose.”
Dean watched as he still could not get words to form in his mouth as Michael
shrugged and said, “Okay.”
Gabriel pulled Sam back by his hair, so Sam was looking him in the eyes.
Gabriel had no idea what Sam would choose. He just hoped Sam could manage to
speak since Dean was clearly incapable at the moment. He firmly said, “Sam,
you’re being given a choice. You can either let Dean fuck you in front of all
of us tonight and be free to go home with him or you can remain my slave. Which
do you choose?”
Dean heard Sam’s shaky response, “I want to be with Master. I belong to Master.
Please allow me to be your slave, Master.” Dean didn’t know whether to be
relieved or to go cry in the corner somewhere. He thought it was great he
didn’t have to rape his brother, but at the same time Dean didn’t know which
fate was worse.
Dean remained silent for the rest of dinner. He listened to the chitchat and
how pleased everyone was with dessert. Apparently, Sam made the desserts. Dean
had no idea Sam knew how to make weird little pastries he didn’t know the name
of. They were good so he wasn’t complaining. It was just he’d never had
anything like that before. He figured Gabriel or one of Gabriel’s henchmen must
have taught Sam how to bake those.
Dean also got to watch Lucifer beat the poor girl leashed to the table by him.
He had no idea what the girl did but Lucifer was angry. When Lucifer took out a
lighter to burn the girl, Castiel excused them from dinner and the beating.
++
Dean got to watch Sam crawl back to Gabriel’s quarters which was the door
before Castiel’s quarters. It was Lucifer’s idea since they didn’t want to
watch Lucifer set his slave on fire and Dean could tell that Gabriel
reluctantly accepted. By the time, Dean was behind the closed doors of
Castiel’s quarters, Dean wanted to get drunk.
He unceremoniously flopped himself down on Castiel’s sofa and said tiredly, “I
change my mind. Your brothers are worse than my dad.”
Castiel laughed and handed Dean a beer. He moved Dean’s legs so he could sit
down then he said seriously, “I am sorry for the way they acted tonight.
Gabriel would never let them hurt Sam.”
Dean threw his arm over his head and said, “Seriously Cas? I am pretty sure Sam
is hurt right now. He just crawled like half a mile and up a flight of stairs.”
He sat up and said, “I wonder if he is okay. He didn’t seem like he was all
there tonight.”
Dean heard a knock on the door and Castiel went to answer it. Gabriel stepped
into Castiel’s quarters alone. Dean eyed Gabriel and once the door was closed,
Dean gruffly said, “For the record Gabriel, I think you’re an asshole.”
Gabriel raised an eyebrow and said calmly, “I take it you are upset about the
way Sam was treated tonight. I apologize. As you know, he isn’t normally like
that and I don’t normally treat him like that.”
Dean shook his head and said defeated, “Why did he put up with being treated
like that?”
Gabriel gave a small smile and took a step towards Dean. He was a little uneasy
when he spoke, “It is part of our agreement. Sam knows he has to put on an act
for Michael and Lucifer. I trained him how to act around them. I asked him to
only focus on me and to keep his gaze on my feet at all times.”
Dean nodded and asked hastily, “So is molesting Sam part of your agreement?”
Dean knew he shouldn’t be talking like this but tonight was mentally
exhausting.
Gabriel’s eyes got wide and he said adamantly, “I’ve never molested your
brother. Anything we have done together is because he agreed to it. You are
more than welcome to ask Sam about his sex life, if you feel so inclined.”
Dean rubbed his hands over his face and said as calmly as he could. “How about
I just get to talk to him and make sure he is okay?”
Gabriel nodded and said calmly, “That seems reasonable.”
Dean got up and followed Gabriel back to his quarters. He was surprised that
Gabriel’s quarters had roughly the same layout as Castiel’s but it looked
different. This space was decorated in rich reds and creams. Dean saw Sam
laying on the sofa with a blanket wrapped around him. Dean thought Sam looked a
little sleepy.
He walked over to Sam and knelt down in front of him. Dean noticed that Sam’s
eyes looked a little blurry but they were focusing on him. Sam gave him a small
smile and said tiredly, “My knees hurt.” He took a shallow breath and added,
“I’m okay, Dean.”
Hesitantly Dean asked, “Sammy, why did you choose Gabriel over being free?”
Sam pulled his blanket a little tighter around himself. He closed his eyes for
a moment before opening them. Dean could see that they were bright with unshed
tears. Brokenly Sam said, “It wasn’t worth it, not for me. I'm just a slave.
I’m not someone you should torture yourself over. You have Castiel and freedom.
You should enjoy that instead of worrying about a slave.”
Dean bunched up his hands in fists and wished he could just shake some sense
into Sam. But he knew he couldn’t. Dean felt tears streaming down his face when
he said passionately, “Sammy, don’t you ever talk about yourself like that. You
mean more to me than Castiel or freedom or anything else you can think of.”
Sam was quiet for a moment then he asked, “Was it easier for you when you
thought I was dead?”
Dean gave Sam an incredulous look and said adamantly, “No, it wasn’t easier. I
was grief stricken. I missed you and I still miss you because you’re my
brother. At least now, I can go to sleep at night knowing you’re alive, I can
see you, and I am pretty sure Gabriel isn’t going to beat you.”
Sam blinked at Dean a couple times and nodded. Dean could see something in
Sam’s eyes. Something told Dean that Sam knew this was his life now and there
was no changing that. Dean never wanted to see Sam accept his life as a slave.
He would rather die a thousand times than have this happen to Sam. He put a
hand on Sam’s cheek for a moment as a sign of brotherly affection as he fought
back tears.
Before Dean broke down again, he got up and left Gabriel’s quarters without a
word. Dean went back to Castiel’s quarters and sat down on the floor next to
his duffel. He looked around the room from the floor and thought about how this
was the level at which Sam viewed the world. Dean could see the vulnerability
in that and he could almost understand the desire to rely on someone to keep
him safe.
Dean opened up his duffel and pulled out Sam’s box of postcards. He ran his
hand over the box and thought about how much he wished for something more for
his brother. He had always wished for something more for his brother. Dean
hoped that someday, Sam could have something more.
He opened out the box of postcards and just pulled a random card out. This one
had a picture of a covered bridge. Dean couldn’t remember off hand if or when
they had seen the covered bridge in the picture. Tentatively, Dean flipped over
the card to read what Sam wrote.
“I can swim without Dean’s help! I will miss just getting to float in the river
with my brother.”
Dean gave a small smile. Sam had always been nervous around the water and as he
recalled Sam was around 8 or 9 before he was finally able to swim. Dean was
relieved because he didn’t have to worry as much about Sam drowning in a lake
or river after that and they could just play in the water.
It reminded Dean of a much simpler time in his life and he missed those days.
He wished he could have them back and he wished he could have his brother
back. 
***** Chapter 24 *****
Sam wasn’t sure why Dean left so suddenly. It wasn’t like him. He always said
bye, good night, or something. He never just got up and left. It made Sam
wonder if he did something wrong but he couldn’t think of what he had done
wrong. Sam had obeyed his master like he was supposed to.
He knew that dinner was difficult for him. He was cold and felt exposed from
wearing so little clothing. It wasn’t Sam’s choice. It was Gabriel’s choice to
dress him like that but Sam thought that was okay. Sam knew that even wearing
what he wore was a privilege. He knew the other slaves were naked at least he
had his privates covered.
Sam also hadn’t kneeled on a hard surface like that for that long. Gabriel
always had him kneel on a soft surface or a pillow and even then he was allowed
to eventually shift the weight off his knees and sit on the floor. He wasn’t
allowed to do that tonight because of Michael and Lucifer. Then he had to crawl
back to Gabriel’s quarters which was torture in Sam’s opinion.
By the time Sam got into Gabriel’s quarters his knees and the palms of his
hands were bloody. He was grateful and relieved when Gabriel helped him to the
sofa. Then Gabriel cleaned up his hands and knees while whispering praises and
reassurance. Gabriel helped him get changed into more comfortable clothes and
wrapped a blanket around him so he could warm up. Sam felt loved by Gabriel’s
treatment.
He felt rejected by Dean’s treatment. Sam wondered if he made the wrong choice
and now maybe Dean didn’t love him. It was pretty clear to Sam that Dean didn’t
want to be around him. Sam ducked his head down into his blanket and sniffled.
Seeing Dean was one of his joys of life and now Dean didn’t want to be around
him.
Gabriel noticed that Sam seemed upset. He wasn’t happy about taking Sam to
dinner and he wasn’t happy with the way his brothers treated Sam. Gabriel was
also a little pissed off at Castiel for putting Sam on the spot to make a
choice. He knew Sam had trouble making choices and to be forced to choose
between the two options he had been given tonight was troubling.
Gabriel walked over to Sam and knelt down in front of him. He gently pulled the
blanket down to unbury Sam’s face. He could see tears falling down Sam’s
tightly closed eyes. It hurt Gabriel to see Sam like this. Sam was always so
good and polite. Sam didn’t deserve to be upset. Gabriel leaned forward and
gave Sam a small kiss on his forehead.
Then Gabriel lightly brushed Sam’s hair out of his face. Gently Gabriel asked,
“Why are you upset, Sam? I know I said some degrading things about you tonight
and I’m sorry. I don’t think of you like that. I love you. I just don’t want
Michael and Lucifer to hurt you, so I have to seem a little rougher than I am.
I’m sorry.”
Sam wiped away his tears with the back of his hand. He was careful not to get
the tears on the scuffed palms of his hands. Brokenly Sam said, “It’s not you.
Dean hates me.”
Gabriel sighed and put his arms around Sam to sit him up. He maneuvered himself
and Sam so that he was sitting next to Sam on the sofa and Sam’s head was
resting on his chest. Gabriel started lightly running his fingers down Sam’s
back and arm. He kissed Sam on the top of the head and said quietly, “Dean
doesn’t hate you.” Gabriel held onto Sam a little tighter and kept the same
gentle tone, “Why do you think he hates you?”
Sam shrugged in Gabriel’s grasp and said weakly, “Because I chose to be a slave
instead of being free.”
Gabriel hummed for a moment as he thought. He carefully spoke while keeping his
voice soft, “Sam, you know Michael and Lucifer were being cruel. No matter what
you decided it wasn’t an easy choice and there was no right choice. If I was in
your position, I would have made the same choice as you. I don’t think I could
let Castiel have sex with me.”
Sam looked up at Gabriel with hopeful eyes. He asked tentatively, “Really?”
Gabriel gave a small smile and said quietly, “Really kiddo.”
Sam leaned back onto Gabriel. He knew Gabriel was being honest with him because
Gabriel didn’t typically lie to him. He closed his eyes and tried to hide his
nerves but he knew he failed. He was shaking in Gabriel’s hold and his voice
stuttered when he spoke, “Do you think Dean will want to see me again?”
Gabriel gave Sam a confused look and said adamantly, “Yes, you are going to see
Dean again. Probably tomorrow. He visits you at my home every month and I don’t
see any reason for that to change.”
Sam nodded and said with uncertainty, “But he left without out saying goodbye
or good night or anything and he was angry. You sent me away when my dad was
angry and he never said goodbye. I never got to see him after that. Then he
stopped calling me. I think my dad hates me. Why does everybody hate me? Is it
because I’m a slave?” He wiped his eyes with the back of his hands. Sam was
determined not to start crying again.
Gabriel rested his head on top of Sam’s. He sighed and said reassuringly, “I
don’t hate you. Castiel doesn’t hate you. Dean doesn’t hate you. And I don’t
think your dad hates you. I think it is just difficult for him to see you as a
slave. You’re his son, Sam. He loves you.”
Sam huffed out a breath and corrected. “I was his son. Now, I am just a
groveling slave.”
Gabriel rolled his eyes because he knew Sam couldn’t see him do that. He gave
Sam a light squeeze and said calmly, “Sam, you’re not a groveling slave. You’re
my slave so I get to decide if you’re groveling or not. Michael doesn’t decide
that. I do and you’re not a groveling slave. You’ve never had to grovel for
anything with me. You don’t have to want for anything.”
Sam curled himself a little tighter onto Gabriel and closed his eyes. He wanted
to believe what Gabriel was saying but it was just hard. He knew he never
really asked Gabriel for anything. He hardly ever told Gabriel no to anything
he asked. He even tried to get up to cook Gabriel breakfast with the flu once.
Sam frowned at that because the flu instance was one of the few times Gabriel
forced Sam to do anything. Gabriel forced him to stay in bed and rest.
Sam felt himself relax a little then he felt Gabriel’s hand wander down to his
waist and start to go under the band of his pajama bottoms. He tensed up
because he didn’t want to do anything right now. However, Sam knew he hadn’t
told Gabriel no to anything in bed. He had said in the past if he didn’t want
to do something, but he never directly said no. Then once Sam agreed to a
particular activity, he never denied Gabriel at any future time Gabriel wanted
it.
This time just felt different to Sam. Nervously he said, “Gabriel.. Master…
What are you doing?”
Gabriel started to palm Sam’s groin. Sam was flaccid against his hand but he
was working to correcting that. He whispered, “Shh.. Sam, it’s okay. I’m just
going to make you feel good.”
Sam froze and he was certain his mind shut down for a moment. He didn’t want
this. He didn’t want to be touched right now. Sam could feel Gabriel’s hand
rubbing his dick and balls. He knew he wasn’t getting hard which he thought was
a miracle. Still, Sam didn’t know what to do. He knew he had never been
sexually attracted to Gabriel. He let Gabriel do things with him because it
felt good and he let Gabriel take his virginity because Gabriel was his master.
Gabriel gave him everything, so Sam gave him everything he had.
Sam felt his dick start to get hard, even though he really didn’t want it too.
He knew he was in a little bit of a daze. He thought back about how he wanted
to lose his virginity and what he wanted his first real make out session to be
like. It was nothing like he imagined when he was 14 and free. He didn’t get
caressed or get to caress some pretty girl. No, he got touched and praised by a
prince. He remembered that he nearly screamed from in pain the first time they
had sex until Gabriel found that spot inside him that felt so good.
He wondered what Dean would think if Dean knew the things he let Gabriel do to
him. Sam figured Dean would hate him, if he didn’t already. Sam sighed silently
to himself when he realized Dean was right. Anal sex did hurt and he did bleed
the first time. Sam wondered if Gabriel was going to fuck him tonight.
That question was answered when Sam felt Gabriel move his hand down further and
start to rub around his asshole. Idly Sam wondered what would happen if he told
Gabriel no or asked him to stop. He wondered if he could prove Dean wrong and
show him that Gabriel would hit him or beat him. Sam wondered if Gabriel would
add to the scars the guards already put on him.
All Sam knew is he didn’t want to do this right now and when he felt Gabriel
start to push a finger inside of him. Sam even surprised himself when a shaky,
“No,” escaped his mouth. Gabriel didn’t pull his finger out and Sam wasn’t
honestly expecting him too. However, Gabriel did still his hand and Sam
realized that his eyes were closed.
Gabriel stopped what he was doing but he didn’t pull away. He saw that Sam was
tense. He gently ran a hand through Sam’s hair and asked softly, “Sam, do you
not want me to make you feel good right now?”
Sam felt a Gabriel wiggle his finger inside of him with that question and Sam
wondered what exactly he was supposed to say. He thought lying seemed like a
good option. He figured it was probably better than the truth. Sam had no idea
how exactly to say to someone, “I know you own my body and I don’t really have
a choice, but I would appreciate it if you stopped touching me. I don’t want to
have sex with you. I crawled all over a fucking palace for you tonight and I
would like to end tonight without come dripping out of my ass.”Sam sighed
internally because saying that would probably get him executed.
Sam felt Gabriel pull the finger out of his ass. Then he felt Gabriel pull his
hand out from his pants. Sam still did not open his eyes. He felt Gabriel
adjust his hold on him and Sam wondered what he was doing. Then Sam heard
Gabriel’s concerned voice, “Sam, please talk to me. Did I hurt you?”
Sam wondered briefly why he agreed to play house with Gabriel four years ago.
He should have known what he was getting himself into. Sam knew Gabriel wasn’t
hurting him with what he was doing. He just didn’t want to do it. He wondered
about the correct way to word that without sounding like he was trying to deny
his master. Sam decided to just tell an edited version of the truth and hope he
doesn’t lose any privileges.
Nervously Sam said, “You’re not hurting me. I’m sorry for being ungrateful and
speaking out like that I just didn’t want you to touch me there. I’m sorry. You
don’t have to stop. I’m yours.” Sam was hopeful Gabriel wouldn’t be to upset.
Gabriel thought he was going to be sick. He thought about asking Sam if he had
not wanted to do this in the past and just didn’t say anything. The very notion
that he could have been molesting or even raping Sam made him sick. Still he
knew he had talked to Sam about being able to say no before. He had talked to
Sam about it many times.
He thought about what exactly he should say. Gabriel hated taking Sam to see
Michael and Lucifer because his brothers treated their slaves like garbage and
whenever Sam saw them Sam tended to get nervous about being treated like that.
Gabriel had noticed in the past that Sam would either try harder to please him
or just sit around like a terrified cat until they left. He thought about
leaving and going home right now. However, Gabriel knew it was probably
important for Sam to see Dean before they left to get the idea of Dean hating
him out of Sam’s head.
Gabriel sighed and said carefully, “Sam, you’re not being ungrateful and please
speak out as much as you want around me when my brothers aren’t around. I want
to be clear on something with you, okay?” He waited for Sam to nod. Then he
said firmly, “If I am touching you and you don’t want me to touch you. I am
hurting you and that is not okay. If you don’t want me to do something. Then
you can tell me to stop. You can tell me no and I will. I promise, Sam. I am
not going to force myself on you.”
Sam nodded to show he understood. He wondered if he screwed up by just letting
Gabriel do whatever he wanted. He licked his lips and asked, “So you want me to
tell you when I don’t want you to touch me?”
Gabriel looked down at the top of Sam’s head as he tried to fight off his
nausea. He adamantly said, “Yes that is exactly what I want you to do.”
Sam opened his eyes for the first time since this started. He noticed that his
dick was flaccid again which he was thankful for. He also noticed that Gabriel
seemed tense behind him but wasn’t making any effort to stop holding him. Sam
knew Gabriel liked to hold him and he had actually taken to the attention. He
knew it was his unstated job to keep Gabriel happy.
Sam knew that Gabriel’s happiness was key to him not being discarded and there
was another group of slaves coming in tomorrow. He felt his stomach tighten up
because he didn’t want to get executed in front of Dean. Sam turned and kissed
Gabriel on the lips gently like he knew Gabriel liked. Then Sam pulled back. He
looked at Gabriel briefly in the eyes before lowering his gaze. He quietly
said, “I love you, Gabriel. I couldn’t ask for a better Master. Will you let me
show you how much you mean to me?”
Gabriel kissed Sam back on the lips and said quietly, “You already have, Sam.
Why don’t we get ready for bed? It has been a long day and we need to go pick
out movies for tomorrow evening while that crap is going outside.”
Sam leaned his head back up against Gabriel and said quietly, “Okay, but last
year you said you we were going to play strip poker during that.”
Gabriel laughed and hugged Sam. He grinned when he said happily, “Castiel and
Dean might be in and out. I don’t want to traumatize our brothers or get
punched by yours.”
Sam frowned at that and asked curiously, “Would you hurt Dean if he hit you?”
Gabriel chuckled and said, “No, I’m surprised he hasn’t hit me. Honestly, I
thought he was going to hit me tonight when I went to Castiel’s room. He was a
little upset about the dinner. Dean told me that I am an asshole.”
Sam could feel his heart beating when Gabriel said that. He nervously asked,
“What did you do?”
Gabriel kissed Sam on the top of his head and spoke earnestly, “I apologized. I
did act like an asshole over dinner. I like your brother’s honesty. It is one
of his endearing qualities. Well, his most endearing quality is that he is your
big brother. I like seeing protective big brother Dean. Sometimes I wish
Michael and Lucifer were protective of me, but they never were. You have
something special with your brother. Don’t ever forget that, kiddo.”
++
Before bed, Sam got permission from Gabriel to send a postcard to his dad.
Gabriel promised to mail it when they went out in the morning. Sam was excited
and Gabriel had given him a postcard with a picture of the palace to send John.
Now all Sam had to do was figure out what to write. He knew he didn’t have a
lot of space, but he had so much he wanted to say. He also knew he couldn’t
word things the way he wanted because of the chance of Michel or Lucifer
getting a hold of the card.
Carefully Sam wrote:
“Hi Dad,
I am doing okay. My Master is kind to me. I finished high school and I am going
to college online. Master ordered me to study law. I love you and I miss you.
Sam.”
He ran his fingers over the words and Sam hoped his father would care. He hoped
his father still loved him and he hoped his father missed him. Even if deep
down he had his doubts. Sam handed the postcard to Gabriel to be mailed. 
***** Chapter 25 *****
Dean wasn’t sure how he felt about being with Castiel at the palace on the day
they were bringing in new slaves. Dean tried not to look at them as what they
were, just kids. It pained Dean to think about how many of these kids would die
today. He had heard rumors about what happened when the slaves were processed
and how they were subsequently killed.
He never saw it. Even Sam had been vague on what that first day had been like.
Dean often wondered what it is Sammy went through that first day. He knew Sam
had gotten hit and he knew Gabriel had chosen him for whatever reason. But that
was about the extent of his knowledge. Sam would never go into details, instead
he would just tell Dean it didn’t matter. Castiel would tell Dean that it
wasn’t his story to tell.
So here Dean was staring out the window of Castiel’s private quarters watching
as slaves and guards setup what looked like stockades to process in the new
slaves. Dean wondered why it appeared none of the slaves had on shoes. He had
seen that before at Gabriel’s house, but the two household slaves Gabriel had
were typically inside or on a manicured lawn. These slaves were walking on hot
cement and moving around heavy equipment. Dean could see easily how they could
get hurt. It did make Dean wonder something though, why did Sammy have shoes
and socks?
After the stockades were setup Dean could see slaves setting up what looked
like a place with scissors and hair clippers. Another station had small boxes
for some purpose Dean wouldn’t quite understand. Another where metal collars
were laying on the ground. Then there were two large holding pins. Dean thought
they were treating the slaves like animals and he had a morbid curiosity on how
this process worked. Sammy had faced it so he should know.
Soon enough he saw the first trailer pull into the lot. He watched as the kids
slowly filtered out, only to be hit with a whip upon exiting the trailer. Some
of the kids stumbled off their feet. Some of them just curled into themselves.
None of them fought back. It hurt Dean to see this. It hurt him when he watched
the kids line up in front of the guards. He watched as the kids took off their
clothes. None of them even tried to protest, which Dean could not understand.
Next he watched as they got their hair cut off and their heads shaved. Dean
could not understand the point of this. The hair was just discarded on the
ground and blew away with the wind. It was clear to Dean it was meant to take
away the individuality each of the teenagers had. He wondered why aside from
bowing their heads to wipe away tears, why none of the teenagers tried to stop
them from cutting their hair. Dean remembered that Sam had always been
particular about his hair and he knew it must have upset Sam to get it cut off
like that.
Then Dean watched as a bulky metal collar was attached to their necks. Some of
them stretched their necks or leaned their heads to the side to give better
access to secure it. Others looked like they were on a death march as the
collar was attached. It was then Dean realized something. This whole purpose
was the first stone in establishing with these children that they are no longer
free. They were slaves.
Finally Dean watched as the slaves were divided by gender. He noticed the girls
were left alone in their pin for the most part. But in the boys pin there were
guards whipping and beating them. Dean was certain that one of the guards had a
razor and was carving away at one of the boys. Dean had to look away. He could
not understand how in a civilized society this was allowed to go on. He could
not understand what Sam thought about when he was in that position.
Castiel noticed Dean had been watching the processing of the first set of new
slaves. He noticed that Dean looked increasing pale and upset throughout the
process. Cas could understand. He didn’t like it but he was powerless to stop
it. He walked over to the window by where Dean was standing and he closed the
curtain.
Carefully Castiel asked, “Dean, are you okay?”
Dean shook his head no and said with strain, “No, I am not. How is something
like this allowed to go on?.. My God, what was Sammy thinking when this
happened to him?”
Castiel was quiet for a moment as he processed what to say. He hesitantly said,
“I don’t think this should be allowed to go on, but I can’t stop it. Sam never
completely went through that process.”
Dean pinched the bridge of his nose and said brokenly, “How the hell would you
know what Sam went through Cas?”
Castiel looked away for a moment and said flatly, “I apologize, Dean. I was
here the day Sam was brought here. When I met him. He was still dressed in his
street clothes and he was bleeding in Gabriel’s bathtub. He had three bad
lashes across his back that were bleeding heavily. Gabriel needed my help to
get him stitched up and stabilized.”
Dean sighed and asked aggregately, “And Sammy was just okay with that?”
Castiel sighed back at Dean and said sternly, “No, he was not okay with it. I
think he was scared, more than anything. However, that is really Sam’s story to
tell.” Castiel added a little sterner, “Please do not judge your brother for
the choices he made. Your brother is alive and he loves you.”
Dean shook his head and said tiredly, “I know. I’m sorry.”
Castiel scuffed, “I’m not the one you need to apologize too. You’ve been
avoiding Gabriel and Sam all day. They have invited us to come over anytime.
Perhaps we should join them?”
Dean sighed and said with a shaky voice, “I don’t know what to say to him. I
looked in his eyes last night and I realized that he just accepted that he’s a
slave. It’s like he honestly believes he is nothing. I can’t look at that.”
Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean and said quietly, “Can’t or won’t? Gabriel
says Sam is livelier anytime you’re around.”
Dean grumbled, “Yeah, well I sure couldn’t tell that last night at dinner.”
Castiel sighed and hit Dean playfully on the ass, “I warned you about how Sam
had to act.”
Dean groaned at the slap on his ass and said a reluctant, “Fine.”
++
Dean stepped out of Castiel’s quarters and looked over the stairwell. He could
see Lilith with a very pregnant teenager. He knew it was one of the new slaves.
The pregnant woman looked fearful and Lilith just looked evil. He watched as
Lilith circled around her for a few moments and nicked at the pregnant girl’s
skin with a sharp blade. Dean noticed the cuts were centered on her abdomen. He
started to get a sick feeling as he noticed the cuts were getting deeper.
Dean heard Gabriel’s calm and collected voice behind him, “You probably don’t
want to watch that, Dean. Lilith is going to kill that girl and her fetus.”
Dean scrunched up his brow as he turned and asked Gabriel with confusion, “Why
would she do that?”
Gabriel shook his head and said calmly, “You don’t want to know… I was actually
coming to find you.” He paused when Dean raised an eyebrow at him. Gabriel
cleared his throat and said nervously, “Right… Sam has been upset since you
left last night. Somehow, he got it in his head that you hate him. I know you
and Castiel turned down breakfast with us this morning but I was hoping that
you could come over and reassure him.” He paused again and added quickly, “I
understand if you don’t want to though, but I would really appreciate it.”
Dean let out a slow breath because sometimes Gabriel made it really difficult
for him to hate him. Dean wanted to hate Gabriel with every fiber of his being,
but sometimes Gabriel did stuff like this and it made Dean second guess him.
Gabriel was going out of his way to make sure Sam was okay and Dean knew
Gabriel didn’t have too. Dean stammered out, “Yeah sorry, it was a late night.
I was actually coming over to talk to Sammy but I got distracted.”
Gabriel frowned slightly and said regretfully, “There will be a lot of
distractions like that today. Sam and I typically watch movies to drown out the
sound. You and Castiel are more than welcome to join us. We are watching
documentary movies mostly. Anything with violence tends to upset Sam.”
Dean was confused because violence never bothered Sam before. Sam had killed
monsters, looked at some pretty bloody crime scene photos, and watched plenty
of action movies with him. It didn’t add up for Dean. He shook his head and
said in disbelief, “Sam doesn’t like violence? That doesn’t sound like him at
all. We used to watch violent action movies all the time.”
Gabriel nodded and said softly as if he was bracing Dean for something, “That
was before Sam was tortured. That was before Sam witnessed others get tortured,
raped, and murdered. I regret any of that happening to Sam and I feel great
responsibility for that damage.”
Dean looked up at the ceiling and asked slowly, “I thought you said you never
hit Sam.”
Gabriel frowned and said calmly, “That is true. I have never hit Sam or ordered
anyone to hit him. As you know my guards beat him severely and I stopped it.
That is only part of the story. Sam didn’t want pain medicine. He kept ripping
his IV out of his arm and trying to get up.” He paused and said, “I want you to
understand. I had no choice. I had Sam tied down for a few days so he could
heal and get the medication he needed. Then I kept him isolated from everyone
but me and his tutor so he wouldn’t get hurt again.” He shook his head and
looked back up at Dean. “It was one the biggest regrets of my life because Sam
just stopped being Sam. He changed and he deferred to me without much thought.
I realized overtime that by trying to help him. I hurt him.”
Dean had a lot of questions about that. He knew he should talk to Sam about it
but Dean knew Sam didn’t like to talk about it. For some reason, the question
that came out of Dean’s mouth to ask Gabriel was a curious, “How did he piss if
he was tied down?”
Gabriel shook his head and said clearly, “Catheter. I had him sedated before
they put it in and took it out. I didn’t want him to remember that.”
Dean gave an impressed look and said simply, “Sammy always was something of a
prune.” Dean heard the pregnant woman scream and he decided now was a good time
to be anywhere but where he was. “I’m going to go talk to Sammy now.”
++
Sam was leaning up against the wall in the corner as he sat on the floor of
Gabriel’s living room. He had his knees drawn up to his chest and his arms were
wrapped around his legs. Gabriel told him to wear soft clothes today because of
the scrapes on his knees. His master thought that the rough fabric of jeans
could cause the bleeding to start again.
Dean eyed Sam for a moment and wondered what his little brother was doing in
the corner. His mind ran through all sort of scenarios most of which involved
Gabriel telling Sam to sit in the corner. Dean cautiously approached Sam. Once
he was near, Dean knelt down in front of Sam and said softly, “Sammy? Are you
okay?”
Sam looked up at Dean. He hadn’t realized Dean was in the room. He stared at
his brother as he processed whether or not he was okay. Slowly, Sam nodded his
head to indicate that he was okay. He wasn’t bleeding and he wasn’t really in
pain. The screams were starting and he didn’t like that, but Sam didn’t want to
tell Dean that because he didn’t want his brother to think he was weak.
Dean noticed that Sam appeared to still be in pajamas. He put a fake smile on
his face and asked playfully, “Are you going to stay in your pajamas all day?
It’s after lunch.” He was just hoping Sam would say something.
Sam frowned and looked away from his brother. He hated disappointing Dean and
he knew he couldn’t do what Dean wanted. He also wasn’t sure who else was in
the room and he didn’t want to glance up around Dean’s head. Sam’s voice was
near monotone when he spoke, “Master ordered me to dress like this.”
Dean frowned and reached out to pull Sam off the floor. He grabbed hold of
Sam’s arm and pulled him up. Then he helped Sam over to the sofa and sat his
brother down. Dean threw a blanket over Sam and he really wasn’t sure why. He
just had this brotherly urge to make Sam comfortable. After Dean sat down next
to Sam. Dean slowly and carefully said, “Sam, it’s just you and me in here. You
don’t have to call Gabriel, Master, around me.”
Sam closed his eyes and nodded. He figured that Dean probably really did hate
him now. He felt like an idiot for not realizing it was just Dean. Sam could
hear the screams of the new slaves outside and he wanted it to stop. He moved
his hands up to cover his ears as he hoped it would lessen the sound. Sam felt
himself start to shake as the memories started to haunt him like they always
did when he heard the screams.
Dean sat next to Sam stunned for a moment. Sam was shaking with hands over his
ears. His brother’s eyes were tightly closed and Dean was certain he could hear
Sam murmuring, “Make it stop.” Dean didn’t know what exactly Sam wanted him to
make stop.
Carefully Dean pulled Sam’s hands away from his ears. Dean put on his best big
brother voice and said, “Sammy, look at me.” He watched as Sam’s eyes snapped
open. Dean continued, “You are safe. You’re with me and I’m not going to let
anything bad happen to you.” Dean could see the look of disbelief in Sam’s
eyes, but under that he thought Sam looked hopeful. Gently Dean said, “Please
talk to me, Sammy. How can I help you?”
Sam wanted to cry when Dean asked him that. Brokenly Sam said, “The screaming
make it stop.”
Dean internally sighed because of course Sam would want the one thing he
couldn’t give. He decided to do the next best thing. He pulled Sam in for a hug
with Sam’s back to his chest. Dean knew they were too old for this but
desperate times. Dean started humming Hey Jude softly in Sam’s ear just like he
did when they were kids and Sam was afraid.
It took until the fifth time through the song for Dean to notice Sam relaxing.
He could feel his shirt getting wet from Sam’s tears but he didn’t dare say
anything about it. Dean didn’t care if this was a chick flick moment. Right
now, Dean just wanted Sammy to be okay. Dean didn’t know how long he hummed
for. All he did know is that every time he hummed the song ten times. He paused
to tell Sam that he loved him. Sam never uttered a word back to him and that
was okay, Dean thought. Sam was safe and no one was going to hurt him.
++
It was late by the time Dean returned to Castiel’s quarters. Gabriel had
carried a sleeping Sammy to his bed. Dean was actually sort of impressed that
Gabriel could pick up his overgrown brother. It made Dean wonder if Castiel
could carry him around. He figured he would try to con Castiel into attempting
that when they were both in a better mood.
Right now, Dean just wanted a cough drop or something. His throat was raw from
humming so much. He didn’t regret his humming. It kept his brother calm so it
was worth it. Dean was slowly unwrapping a cough drop when Castiel stepped into
the doorway. Castiel had a small smile on his face and he spoke with
admiration, “You really are a good brother, Dean.”
Dean looked at Castiel and his voice was rough and gravely when he spoke,
“Yeah, well, I just want Sammy to be okay. Now, if you don’t mind. I am going
to read one of Sam’s postcards from before he had PTSD.”
Castiel sighed and said calmly, “Dean, I think you made today better for Sam.
He may not be the same Sam that wrote the postcards you love reading, but I am
certain the Sam you spent the day with has some interesting postcards.”
Dean knew Castiel was trying to be deep with him or something, but he was just
too tired. He walked past Castiel and pulled out Sam’s box of postcards. He
opened the box and pulled out one at random. It was an old time photo of people
riding on a two seated bicycle. Dean smiled at it and flipped the card over to
read.
“After two months, I am able to ride a bike. We are moving soon so I will miss
getting to ride our bikes through town with Dean.”
Dean remembered that. Sam was about 10 and they were living in a no name town.
One of his classmates and their siblings were getting new bikes so they gave
Dean the old ones. Dean took the opportunity to teach Sam how to ride a bike.
They spent three months in that town and everyday he and Sammy would go out on
the bikes. When they moved, they couldn’t take the bikes with them and Dean
never thought Sam was disappointed about that.
Reading that postcard made Dean realize that learning how to ride a bike was
one of the normal things Sammy always wanted to do. Then as soon as he got it;
it was ripped away. Dean hoped that one day, he could give Sam everything he
missed and make up for everything that went wrong in Sam’s life.
***** Chapter 26 *****
Sam found that his happiest times were away from Gabriel. He enjoyed going to
the church twice a week. He knew he couldn’t leave the church but he actually
felt sort of free. Sam was 19 now and Dean had finished college. His brother
had an entry-level job for an avionics company because it was near where
Castiel went to grad school. The job meant long hours and Dean wasn’t able to
make it down to see Sam as often. Now, Sam was adjusting to seeing Dean every
two or three months. Sam still hadn’t been able to see or speak to his father.
Sam tried not to think about how it felt like everyone from his old life was
abandoning him. It hurt to think about that. Sam was facing the reality that he
had Gabriel, who he had to keep happy for the sake of survival and he had
Pastor Jim. Sam was fairly certain that Pastor Jim just felt sorry for him. He
couldn’t really blame Pastor Jim for feeling that way towards him. Sam knew
that his life was not the best but he also knew it could be a whole lot worse.
Currently, Sam was at the church folding newsletters, which was easy work. A
blonde woman about a year younger than Sam started coming to the church a few
months ago on Thursdays to help out. Her name was Jessica and she needed
community service hours for her scholarship. Sam thought Jessica was nice
enough and he thought she was pretty, but he never told anyone that.
Jessica was sitting across from Sam and she smiled at him. She grinned and said
with some flirtation, “Sam, you are mysterious.”
Sam looked up from his folding. He hated it when people started asking him
questions at the church. The most common question was ‘Do you get beaten a
lot?’ Sam took a deep breath to prepare himself for the on slot of questions.
Jessica had asked him questions before and he always kept the answers short and
to the point. He didn’t like being the person strangers got to ask what it is
like to be a slave. With some hesitation, Sam said, “I am sorry you feel that
way. There is really not much to me.” He gave her an uneasy smile and hoped she
would drop it.
Jessica hummed for a moment. Then she shook her head gently, “Nope, you are
mysterious, Sam with no last name. You need to loosen up a little I think. Your
parents have you on to short of a leash. I think you should come to a party
with me this Saturday. It will be fun and something people do in college.”
Sam looked up at Jessica and saw the bright smile on her face. He was fairly
certain that if he was free. He would say yes to her question, but he wasn’t.
Sam knew it would be suicidal to mention or even suggest that idea to Gabriel.
He had no idea what Gabriel would do but Sam was fairly certain it would
involve being locked up and alone for an undetermined amount of time.
Sam cleared his throat and said nervously, “I can’t. I’m sorry.”
Jessica whined and said teasingly, “Oh come on, it won’t be that bad. I am sure
your mom and dad won’t be that upset.”
Sam sighed and he was getting annoyed. He rubbed his temples for a moment then
he said slowly, “I haven’t lived with my parents in five years.”
Jessica frowned and leaned forward to give Sam a serious look. Calmly she said,
“Sam, you go to college online. You only leave wherever you live twice a week
and for that, the good pastor has to pick you up. You need to get out and live
a little. Seriously, it’s not like you’re a slave.”
Sam put his elbows on the table and rested his head in his hands. He wondered
how she could not know he was a slave. He never covered up his collar at the
church which was a pretty clear signal that he was a slave. Sam decided to just
end this. Slowly he said, “Jessica that is exactly what I am.”
Jessica gave Sam a confused look and said, “What? A recluse or a slave to your
school work?”
Sam sighed and started to rub his temples from where his head rested in his
hands. He didn’t look up. He quietly said, “If I was free. I would love to go
out with you. However, I am a slave to the Novaks. I am a personal slave to one
of them. I get to go out and do this twice a week as a privilege. I would
appreciate it if you didn’t screw this up for me.”
Jessica was stunned and said, “No way, you’re lying. There are no male slaves.
They kill them all.”
Sam didn’t look up. He felt terrible and beyond humiliated having to explain
this. He didn’t want to explain this but Sam doing something he didn’t want to
do was nothing new. He replied with a quiet, “I’m not lying. You can read the
tag on my collar if you don’t believe me.”
Jessica leaned across the table and took hold of the front of Sam’s collar. She
read the inscription, “Sam, Property of Gabriel Novak”. She let go of Sam’s
collar quickly and sat back down in her seat. She was uneasy, “Sorry, what is
your real name?”
Sam looked up at her for the first time. He sighed and said, “Sam.”
Jessica rolled her eyes and said with frustration, “No, what was your name
before? I know they rename the slaves.”
Sam shook his head and frowned. “It doesn’t matter and I would rather not get
punished.” He lowered his head to his hands in the hope that she would just go
away.
Jessica nodded. Then she asked out of curiosity, “So what does he do with you
anyways?”
Sam looked up and said in a monotone voice, “Whatever pleases him.”
Jessica got a confused look. She was somewhere between shocked and profoundly
curious. She said bluntly, “So he bad touches you. Are you gay?”
Sam sighed and suddenly he just wanted to go home. He asked, “Why are you
asking me this? I’m a slave. It doesn’t matter if I am attracted to men or
women. The only thing that matters is if Master is happy.”
Jessica shook her head and said quietly, “I’m sorry, Sam. I didn’t mean to ask
that. It was rude of me. I know you don’t have much choice.”
Sam huffed out a breath and said, “I don’t have a choice. I am a slave.”
Jessica frowned and looked at Sam with hopeful eyes, “Maybe we could see each
other here? Your master wouldn’t know.”
Sam grimaced, “No, if he finds out...” Sam shook his head as he tried to get
the thoughts of the guards beating him out of his mind. “I don’t want to know
what he’ll do to me. Besides, it is my duty to be loyal to him.”
Jessica leaned forward. She reached out a hand and started tracing it around
Sam’s chin. Sam shuttered under her touch but didn’t do anything to stop her.
Then Jessica said quietly, “He won’t find out. It’ll just be out little
secret.” Jessica leaned forward a little further and gave Sam a small peck on
the lips.
Sam’s eyes opened wide and he pulled back from her. He felt his breathing
increase and was afraid. Sam put his hand out in front of him to keep Jessica
away then he stammered out, “I can’t. I’m sorry.” Sam started to stand up when
he felt a hand on the back of his neck. He knew who it was. It was Gabriel.
Gabriel had been listening to Sam’s conversation with the girl and he wasn’t
impressed. He had Sam sit back down and he kept a firm hold on the back of
Sam’s neck. He had stopped by because he heard that one of the girls was
getting a little flirty with Sam over the past few weeks and he wanted to see
for himself.
Gabriel smiled at the girl and said in the most charming voice he could find.
“I don’t believe we met. My name is Gabriel Novak.”
Jessica reached out her hand for Gabriel to shake. She looked down at Sam, who
was completely still under Gabriel’s grasp. She nervously said, “Um, I’m sorry
sir. My name is Jessica Moore.”
Gabriel hummed for a moment then he said thoughtfully, “I see you have a crush
on my little Samsquash and were sampling the goods.”
Jessica looked from Gabriel to Sam and she realized that Sam wasn’t about to
say anything. Nervously she said, “I do. I’m sorry. Sam didn’t do anything. It
was all me. I didn’t realize that he was your slave, sir. I.. um.. I’ll just be
going now.”
Gabriel sighed and said casually, “You don’t need to go. Sam and I were just
leaving.” He pulled Sam by the collar so Sam would stand. He looked up at Sam
thoughtfully and said, “Maybe I should put you on a leash.” He didn’t have one
with him so he just pulled Sam out of the church by his arm.
++
The drive home was silent. Gabriel took Sam upstairs and to their bedroom by
which time Sam was trembling. Gabriel sighed and said calmly, “Sam, chill out
please.”
Sam looked at Gabriel for the first time and he whispered out, “I’m sorry,
Gabriel. I wasn’t going to do anything with her. I’m yours.”
Gabriel sighed and ran his hands over his face. He was pissed off but he knew
he had to handle this gently. “She asked you a question. She asked you if
you’re gay. Are you, Sam?”
Sam started fidgeting with his hands and he said quietly. “I don’t know. I
thought about it when I was free but I haven’t put much thought into it since I
became a slave. My focus has been on making you happy and when we do things
together it feels good sometimes. So I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
Gabriel nodded and he was satisfied that Sam was telling the truth. He reeled
back his anger and asked, “You said I was going to punish you which is true.
You are in trouble for this. How do you think I should punish you?”
Sam cringed at that. Gabriel had never asked this of him before and honestly
Sam didn’t like the feeling. His mind went through everything the guards did to
him. The times Gabriel isolated him. The times Gabriel drugged him. The times
he had to repeat sentences back to Gabriel for hours on end. Sam had no idea
what exactly he was supposed to say. Sam felt a couple tears fall down his face
when he said, “I’m sorry, Master. Please don’t kill me.”
Gabriel frowned and said swiftly, “I am not going to kill you, Sam. You were
disobedient and bordering on disloyal. My brothers would kill you for that, but
I’m not going to.” He paused and said thoughtfully, “I can’t ban you from
seeing Dean because Castiel would throw a fit. I am considering not allowing
you to go to the church anymore, but I think that helps to keep you sane. So I
am not sure I want to do that. I really don’t want any more scars on your body
and I don’t want anyone to have a piece of you but me. So I can’t throw you to
the guards.”
Sam out of desperation dropped to his knees and begged, “I’m sorry, Master.
Please, I’ll do anything. I’m yours. I promise. Please, Master, I’m sorry.”
Gabriel sighed and ran a hand through Sam’s hair. He found it incredibly
difficult to stay mad at Sam. Calmly Gabriel said, “I’m disappointed, Sam. You
let someone else kiss you. I know you didn’t kiss back and you freaked out when
she did it. However, I am still disappointed.” He paused and sighed, “Take your
clothes off, Sam.” 
Sam quickly removed his clothes without getting up off of his knees. He was
shaking violently by the time he was naked. Sam was absolutely terrified of
what Gabriel was going to do to him. He had his head bowed down so he couldn’t
see anything but Gabriel’s feet. Sam heard Gabriel walk away from him but he
didn’t dare look up.
A few moments later Gabriel returned to in front of Sam. He pushed in a bar of
soap into Sam’s mouth. Gabriel smiled at Sam’s grimace. Once the bar was at the
back of Sam’s mouth, Gabriel was pleased that Sam bit down on the soap to hold
it in place. He ran a hand through Sam’s hair and said firmly, “Good boy, just
stay where you are and hold that in your mouth. We have to remind you of who
that mouth belongs too.”
Sam didn’t look up at Gabriel. He just lowered his head and tried to ignore the
bitter taste of the soap. He wondered if Gabriel was going to do anything else.
Sam wondered why Gabriel had him strip to do this. He knew it didn’t really
matter what Gabriel’s reasoning was. Sam knew he deserved this and much worse.
As time ticked by, Sam felt soapy drool running down his chin and onto the
floor. He thought about swallowing it but figured that would make him sick. He
really didn’t want to give Gabriel more reason to be angry with him. Sam
wondered absently how long Gabriel was going to do this for. He knew Gabriel
had left the room or was at least out of sight. Sam just watched the ever
growing pile of soapy drool on the floor. He hoped he could make it up to his
master.
Gabriel came back to check on Sam after an hour. He didn’t mean to leave Sam
with a bar of soap in his mouth for that long, but Michael called. He had to
deal with matters pertaining to running a country. Gabriel thought that legal
matters could be better dealt with if they didn’t torture and kill anyone that
pissed them off. However, his brothers had different ideas and it had been
working for centuries.
Gabriel gently pulled the bar of soap out of Sam’s mouth. He was glad Sam
didn’t swallow it. He was a little worried about Sam doing that. He watched as
Sam licked his lips and Gabriel found it erotic. Gabriel calmed himself as he
reminded himself that this was about punishing Sam and not about getting his
rocks off. He gently ran a hand through Sam’s hair and he was disappointed to
find that Sam had not been crying. He knew this meant he had to work a little
harder to get through to Sam.
Calmly Gabriel stated, “I don’t think you’ve learned your lesson. Go lay down
on the bed on your back.” Gabriel watched as Sam readily complied. He almost
felt bad for what he was about to do. He went over to a dresser and pulled out
some rope. Gabriel tied Sam’s hands to the headboard of the bed.
Gabriel watched Sam stare intently at the ceiling after he was tied. He sighed
and said, “You’re not going to get anything unless you ask for it. So Sam, is
there anything you want right now?”
Sam tried not to focus on the fact that he was tied down. He knew Dean wasn’t
expected to visit for at least another month. He wondered if Gabriel would keep
him tied down that long. Sam hated this. It brought back bad memories. Sam
could only think of one thing he wanted. He glanced over at Gabriel and
deferred when he spoke, “I only wish to please you, Master.” Sam paused because
it took him a moment to actually say what he said, “Please do anything you wish
with me.”
Gabriel hummed for a moment. He walked around the bed eying Sam. He had half a
mind to fuck Sam right now to show him who he belonged too. However, he didn’t
want to reward bad behavior. Regretfully Gabriel said, “You’re going to stay
tied down until Tuesday.” Gabriel then slipped the bar of soap back into Sam’s
mouth.
 ++
Early Tuesday morning when Gabriel finally removed untied Sam. Sam was begging
for forgiveness. Sam willingly gave Gabriel anything and everything he wanted
which amounted to sexual favors. He was just happy to be able to move. His arms
throbbed from being tied down so long. Gabriel kept putting the soap back in
his mouth throughout the time for hours at a time. Sam really hated soap by
this point.
Sam did get to talk to Dean on the phone every day when he was tied down. He
never told Dean that he was being punished. He had no idea what Dean would say,
but Sam did wonder if he should tell Castiel. He had no idea if Castiel would
even care but maybe he could be Castiel’s slave instead. He hoped that Castiel
wouldn’t do things like this but then again Sam knew Gabriel didn’t want to do
things like this. Sam knew his punishment was justified and he thanked Gabriel
for punishing him.
Pastor Jim picked Sam up to take him to the church. He noticed that Sam looked
frightened and he could see where Sam’s wrists had rope burn. Pastor Jim knew
he had never seen a mark on Sam before and he wasn’t surprised to see it now.
Once they pulled into the church parking lot, Pastor Jim cautiously asked, “Do
you want to talk about it?”
Sam lowered his head and started rubbing his wrists. He shook his head no. Then
his voice cracked when he said, “It’s nothing I didn’t deserve. I got punished.
It’s not a big deal.”
Pastor Jim nodded and decided not to prod any further. He stepped out of the
car and they walked into the church. They were greeted by a very nervous
Jessica. She stammered out, “I’m sorry. I was just worried about Sam after
Thursday.”
Sam didn’t look at her. He stepped back from her and said quietly in a broken
voice, “Please stay away from me. Please.” She reached out to touch Sam and Sam
flinched back away from her. His body hit the wall and he said, “Please just
leave me alone.”
Jessica saw Sam’s wrists and she stated calmly, “You’re hurt.” She stared at
Sam’s face and her heart ached to help him. “Please let me check your wounds.”
Sam looked up at her for the first time. His eyes were rimmed with red. “I am
fine. I do not need your help. Please go away.”
Jessica gave one last pleading attempt, “Please Sam, let me help you.”
Sam clenched his jaw and stated again, “Please leave me alone.”
Pastor Jim said clearly, “Sam, Gabriel isn’t here right now. I can lock the
door to make sure he can’t come in so you can have some privacy. I know I
cannot change anything. But please..”
Sam closed his eyes and let a couple tears fall down his face. He brokenly
said, “Please take me back to Master. I don’t want to get punished again.”
Pastor Jim sighed and pulled out his phone. He dialed Dean’s number. Dean
answered on the second ring, “This is Dean.”
Calmly Pastor Jim said, “I am putting you on speaker.” He put the phone on
speaker then he said, “Gabriel hurt Sam and Sam is with me right now. Sam has
marks on him and he won’t let us help him or tell us what happened.”
They could hear Dean grumbled then reply sharply, “Sammy, tell me what
happened. I can talk to Cas and he can talk to Gabriel so it doesn’t happen
again. Okay? It will be okay, I promise.”
Sam knew this could only get worse. If he didn’t tell Dean then Dean would go
directly to Castiel. Castiel would, in turn, go to Gabriel and then they would
have an argument. Sam had no idea what that outcome would be. It upset him
because he was so close to finally getting to be free and now it was looking
like that was getting ripped away from him.
Sam glared at Jessica when he spoke, “A girl at the church kissed me on
Thursday. I didn’t kiss back but Gabriel saw. I don’t think he was happy with
the answers to the questions Jessica was asking me, like if I was gay or not.
So anyways, Gabriel didn’t hit me. He just tied me with soap in the mouth about
four days.”
Dean bellowed into the phone, “He what? What the Hell, Sam? I talked to you
yesterday and the day before that. Were you tied down then?”
Sam sighed and said, “Yes Dean, he took the soap out of my mouth so I could
talk to you.” Then Sam begged, “Please don’t tell Castiel. I don’t want to make
this worse.”
Dean sighed and said calmly, “Sammy, it’s going to be okay. I promise. I love
you and I am going to make sure you don’t get hurt again. Did you or Gabriel
look at your wounds?”
Sam nodded even though Dean couldn’t see him and swallowed hard. He tentatively
said, “Yes Dean, it is just rope burn and some bed sores. I’ll be fine. I think
Gabriel has forgiven me and I would like to keep it that way.”
Dean grumbled a little then he said, “Sammy, do me a favor, would you? Could
you send me a postcard today? I am sure Pastor Jim could mail it for you.”
Sam wasn’t an idiot. He knew why Dean wanted him to send a postcard. Dean
thought Gabriel was either going to kill him or not let him see Dean anymore.
Sam wanted to just sit down on the floor and ball like a baby. He was so angry
at Jessica for messing up his life more by being nosey. If she would have just
left him alone, he would have never gotten punished and he wouldn’t be in this
situation right now.
Sam wandered away from the phone which Pastor Jim held in his hand and sat down
in a vacant stairwell. He had nothing more to say to anymore, possibly ever.
Well, he could see himself begging for forgiveness from Gabriel sometime in the
near future. Sam wondered if maybe he should just ask Gabriel not to allow him
out anymore. He wondered if maybe he would still be able to get his daily phone
call from Dean.
After a few minutes of self-pity, Pastor Jim handed Sam a postcard. He didn’t
even look at the front to see what was on it. Sam didn’t care. On the back of
the card, Sam wrote,
“Dean,
The postcard you keep in your coat pocket, where I say that you’re my hero. I
want you to know that is still true. Thank you for all the good memories and
helping me grow up to be a good person. I will miss being your hero.
Sammy”
Sam handed the postcard back to Pastor Jim. He knew it read like he was never
going to see or speak to Dean again. Sam honestly didn’t expect to live much
longer thanks to Jessica Moore.  
***** Chapter 27 *****
Castiel was livid after he got a call from Dean explaining what happened to
Sam. He was genuinely concerned that this would eventually happen. This is why
he never wanted Gabriel to take a slave in the first place. However, ever since
Castiel found out that Sam is his boyfriend’s brother he had been having a
difficult time wishing Gabriel never took Sam on. Gabriel did save Sam’s life,
but there were times when Castiel wondered if it was really better this way.
He wondered if it would have been better for Dean to find out that he is
Castiel Novak after years of dating and after Dean got a little box in the mail
with his brother’s ashes. Castiel knew that Dean would still be angry with him
if Sam had died five years ago. He knew Dean would probably blame him for his
brother’s death.
The truth is Castiel blamed himself for everything. No matter what way things
turned out, Dean would have gotten hurt. Castiel didn’t know if knowing what
was happening to Sam made it more painful for Dean. He had no idea if believing
Sam was dead and his suffering was over would bring Dean more peace. Castiel
had no idea.
He also had to deal with the fact that Sam was very much alive and had just
been tortured by his brother for four days. Castiel didn’t want to put Dean on
the spot so he decided to fly down to see Gabriel alone. He found someone that
he wanted to interview nearby for one of his research papers as a cover story.
Sometimes Castiel thought, it paid to have wealth.
Castiel arrived at Gabriel’s mansion late in the afternoon. The house was quiet
and he had purposely sent Gabriel an email telling him he was coming. He knew
Gabriel was unlikely to check his email. He wanted to see what things were like
when he showed up unannounced.
Castiel made his way up the stairs and unlocked the door. He walked down the
hallway to the study. There he found Sam sitting on the floor next to Gabriel.
Sam was only wearing his boxers and Castiel could see marks on Sam. Sighing
Castiel knocked on the door to get their attention. He got a startled look from
Gabriel but Sam didn’t even look up. That worried him.
Castiel gave a small frown and said calmly, “Gabriel, I am sorry for intruding.
I sent you an email earlier today. I am in town to do an interview for one of
my papers.”
Gabriel glanced at Sam then back to Castiel. He tentatively stated, “I must
have missed that. Is Dean with you?” He was hoping Dean was not with Castiel
because Dean would be angry.
Castiel gave a small smile and said simply, “No, he had to work.” He took a
step further into the room and eyed Sam. He grimaced and said with confusion,
“Did the guards get a hold of Sam again? He has some injuries on him.”
Gabriel glanced down at Sam and petted him lightly on the head. He thought
about lying to Castiel, but he knew that Castiel always knew when he was lying.
It never turned out well when he lied to Castiel. Gabriel sighed and said as if
it didn’t matter, “I had to punish, Sam.”
Castiel nodded in understanding. He took a moment to gather his words and
asked, “Was Michael or Lucifer here? Is that why you did it? I know you
promised Sam that you would treat him well. This does not appear to be treating
him well.”
Gabriel closed his eyes because he knew Castiel wouldn’t understand. Slowly
Gabriel said, “Cassie, it was just me here when I punished Sam. He pissed me
off. He had to learn.”
Castiel pinched the bridge of his nose and took a couple deep breaths. He
sternly said, “Gabriel, in case you failed to notice Sam is a person. He has
feelings. He will and undoubtedly has made many mistakes in his life. Instead
of torturing him to get your point across, it is better to talk to him. You
said you wanted to treat Sam as your equal. Using your position of authority
over him is not treating him as an equal.”
Gabriel shook his head. He started to card his fingers through Sam’s hair. Sam
was staying silent for this argument but Gabriel could see the silent tears on
Sam’s face. It bothered him, but he felt like what he did had helped Sam become
more faithful to him. He also knew that Castiel was here because Sam told Dean
what happened earlier in the day. Gabriel tried to hide how angry he was when
he spoke, “First of all Castiel, he is my slave not yours. He broke the rules.
Second of all, I know Dean knows he got punished and I am willing to bet Dean
told you. That is the real reason why you’re here isn’t it?”
Castiel sighed and said calmly, “Yes Gabriel, it is. What happened to you,
brother? We were supposed to not become like our brothers. Yet here you are
becoming exactly like them.”
Gabriel stood up and he was angry. He fumed at Castiel, “I am nothing like
them. I did not hit, Sam.”
Castiel sighed again. He took a calming breath and said clearly, “Gabriel, you
tortured him. You do not need to hit someone to torture them. You have been
torturing Sam for years. If you really want to help Sam, if you really want to
protect him like you said, then you need stop. Please Gabriel.”
Gabriel sighed because Castiel did have a point. Still he was pissed about what
Sam did. He closed his eyes and reached down to pet Sam. He wondered what he
should do. Gabriel knew he couldn’t go back on what he did to Sam. He didn’t
want Sam to get outright defiant. However, he did like it when Sam showed more
personality. Gabriel was torn. He knew the chances of Sam staying with him were
low unless he did something. Sadly, Gabriel didn’t think being nice was the
answer.
Calmly Gabriel said, “I want Sam to stay with me after he comes of age. I need
to do what I have to for that to happen. He has to be loyal towards me.”
Castiel sighed from the doorway. He asked with exasperation, “My understanding
of this event was that she kissed him, not the other way around. Did it ever
occur to you that the reason why he didn’t immediately move away from her is
because youtrained him to be passive when someone touched him? He let the
guards beat him until he was permanently disfigured without trying to defend
himself once or asking them to stop. This passivity is nothing new and it
something you instilled in him.”
Gabriel scuffed and said angrily, “The slave wouldn’t define his sexual
orientation. He’s supposed to want me and he couldn’t even say that.”
Castiel seethed for a couple moments then he said, “Gabriel, Sam is 19 and
never dated anyone. He’s shared a bed with you from day one. He has never had a
chance to figure out if he likes guys or girls. Give the kid a break. It seems
pretty clear to me that Sam doesn’t want anyone to fuck him except you. So get
over it.”
Gabriel yelled at Castiel, “How would you feel if Dean wasn’t able to tell you
he was gay?”
Castiel growled back at Gabriel, “For your information, Dean swings both ways
and that hasn’t caused any loyalty problems.”
Gabriel rolled his eyes and took a deep breath. He thought maybe Sam felt the
same way as his brother. Castiel and he had the same orientation so it was
possible that Sam and Dean fell into the same boat. He softened his tone,
“Castiel, I understand what you’re saying. I do. I really do. Sam accepted his
punishment. He apologized and he made amends with me. He asked not to go out
anymore, which I granted. It will give him more time to focus on me.”
Castiel looked at where Sam was sitting on the floor. He could see that Sam was
hurt and that was most likely part of the reason why he asked not to be allowed
out anymore. Castiel was fairly certain Sam was only trying to prevent further
punishment. Carefully Castiel asked, “Sam is hurt. Can I at least make sure he
is okay?”
Gabriel crossed his arms and said coldly, “He’s fine and you can tell your
boyfriend he’s fine.”
Castiel took another step towards Gabriel and Sam. He stared at Sam intently.
He was startled when he could see Sam’s injuries better. There was rope burn
which Dean had mentioned, but Sam was also covered in what looked like bite
marks that broke the skin and hickeys. Castiel had a sick feeling inside. He
knew those marks were from sex and Gabriel was marking Sam as his. It wasn’t
clear to Castiel if Sam wanted that or not. He wasn’t even sure Sam was in the
right mind to be able to voice an opinion on that.
Castiel knew there wasn’t much he could do. He took a step back and shook his
head gravely. “I’m sorry I thought you could be different. I was wrong.”
++
Castiel returned home the next day. Sam had not spoken a word to him and Cas
didn’t see Sam fully dressed the whole time. He was worried about Sam and he
knew that Dean was worried. Cas slipped his trench coat off as he entered his
house. Dean was sitting at the table. He could see that Dean was upset. Castiel
slowly walked over to Dean and he sat down in the vacant chair. He put a hand
on Dean’s thigh in a poor attempt to comfort Dean.
After a long moment of silence, Dean brokenly spoke, “I talked to Sammy today.
He won’t even call Gabriel by name anymore. He just calls Gabriel Master. He
just sounded dead on the phone.”
Castiel was silent for a moment then he asked, “What did you talk about?”
Dean wiped away a tear and said sadly, “He asked me how work was going. He
wanted to know what it felt like to have a job. I just want him back. I want
him here with me.”
Castiel frowned and said solemnly, “I know. I don’t think Gabriel is going to
change much. I’m sorry. I thought my brother was different, but I guess I was
wrong.”
Dean glanced up at Castiel and shook his head. “Gabriel treats Sam like Michael
treats Eve and like Lucifer treats Lilith. The difference is Gabriel isn’t
using his fist to get his point across. Gabriel goes straight for fucking with
Sammy’s head.” Dean paused and said, “If Sammy dies or if he chooses to stay
with Gabriel, I swear I am going to put a bullet in my head.”
 ++
Dean left Castiel’s house a short time later. He wandered the streets until he
came to his apartment. It was a nicer apartment than the one he lived in when
he was in college. John had started hunting again and Dean wasn’t surprised. He
knew his dad could only stay put for so long. Dean missed his father, because
his dad and Sammy were the two rocks in his life. He had half a mind to start
hunting again because being able to kill something would make him feel better,
he thought. Dean knew who he wanted to kill but all of those people were off
limits.
Dean entered his home and went into the kitchen. He poured himself a shot of
whiskey and downed it. The burn from the drink did not take away the pain he
felt inside. If anything, it made the pain burn deeper. As he felt his own
self-pity, Dean realized something. It was something he hadn’t really put much
thought into before.
Castiel could take a slave, maybe not Sam, but he could save some kid’s life.
Dean realized that Castiel could probably take a couple or speak out against
his brothers. He couldn’t wrap his mind around why Cas didn’t help any of them.
Then Dean thought back to Sam’s reaction to Castiel when Dean found Sammy in
Pastor Jim’s office. Sam was afraid of Cas. Dean had never asked Cas if he did
anything to Sam but now he wondered. He wondered if Castiel hurt Sam or if
Castiel was just ambivalent to the situation.
Dean picked up his cell phone and called Castiel. Cas answered on the third
ring with a sleepy, “Hello.”
Dean clicked his jaw and said calmly, “Cas, why don’t you help them?”
Dean could hear Castiel sitting up on the other end. He heard Cas yawn and ask,
“Help who?”
With a little more edge to his voice Dean said, “The slaves, you could save
some of them.”
Castiel sighed on the other end of the phone. Then he said, “Dean, I can’t save
them.”
Dean groaned, “Yes, you can. You could take one or two and give them a decent
life until they are free.”
Castiel was silent for a moment. Then he stated clearly, “My brother Raphael
had that idea. The slaves didn’t listen to him. They wouldn’t do their assigned
work for the city. It drew Michael’s attention and it came to light that
Raphael was not controlling them. Michael killed Raphael and the slaves.”
Castiel paused and sighed, “Dean, I understand that you expect me to do more
but I cannot talk sense into teenagers. Turning them into a slave is a fate
worse than death.”
Dean was silent for a moment. He had heard that Raphael died in an accident.
Carefully Dean asked, “Why don’t you tell people how Raphael died? It could
lead to change.”
Castiel chuckled and stated, “It could lead to my death. Then if Michael is
feeling cruel he would kill you and possibly your brother. I’m sorry, Dean.”
Dean grumbled and said sharply, “Don’t tell me you’re sorry. You just told me
that my brother being alive is worse than him being dead. Screw you, Cas.”
Castiel sighed loudly and said, “Dean, I am only telling you the truth. When
you get your brother back, you are going to end up being his caregiver for the
rest of his life. He is going to have trouble making decisions. He will have
panic attacks, nightmares, anxiety, and quite possibly a whole host of other
mental issues.”
Dean shook away the tears because he knew aside from the part of Sam being
better off dead. Sam was going to have a long road to recovery. Dean made one
last ditch effort to get through to Cas, “Please Castiel, you have to do
something.”
Castiel let out a slow breath and said, “Dean, I’m sorry.”
Dean hung up the phone without saying goodbye. He knew that they were still
okay as a couple. It just hurt to know Castiel wouldn’t do anything. It was
pretty clear to Dean that Cas could do something. He just didn’t want too.
Dean went back to his bedroom and he pulled out Sam’s box of postcards. He
pulled one out that had a picture of the sun setting over the ocean. He
remembered when Sam got to see the ocean for the first time. Sammy was 11 and
his little brother thought it was the neatest thing. Dean could still hear the
sound of the waves mixed with his brother’s laugh. Dean couldn’t remember the
last time he heard Sam laugh and he wondered if he would ever hear it again.
Dean flipped over the postcard to see what Sam wrote:
“I saw the ocean today but I didn’t like the smell of it. I will miss the
feeling of the waves crashing against my feet.”
Dean gave the card a sad smile. Sam was so carefree and happy that day. Dean
doubted Sam would ever be able to feel that way again. Dean doubted he would be
able to feel that way again.
***** Chapter 28 *****
Three hundred and fourteen days that was how many days Sam has left to be a
slave. He has a secret countdown going in his head. Sam was fairly certain the
countdown was one of the only things that kept him from giving up. He felt dead
inside and lonely. Sam knew being lonely was nothing new. He’d seen Dean and
Castiel four times in the past year. The only other person he saw was Gabriel.
Sam didn’t see guards or other slaves when they cooked dinner in the evening.
He knew that was because Gabriel told them to go away. Sam wished he could go
outside. He hadn’t been outside in what felt like ages. He could still see the
outdoor world. He could see the guards in the yard during the day. Sam knew
their pattern. He knew the exact time their shifts started and ended. He knew
what time they went on break and lunch.
He was grateful he still got to talk to Dean on the phone every day. It made
him happy and it took away that pain of loneliness for a few minutes each day.
Sam did get to chat with some of this classmates online for his college
projects. He knew Gabriel likely monitored it so he kept his correspondence
strictly on the task. Sam was happy that he was set to finish his Bachelors
degree around the time he turned 21. He hadn’t said anything to Gabriel but he
was thinking of going to law school in the west. Sam wanted a fresh start once
he was free.
Sam didn’t tell Gabriel that he was looking forward to leaving. He wasn’t
suicidal at this point. He could see the light at the end of the tunnel. All he
had to do was keep Gabriel happy for three hundred and fourteen more days. Then
he could leave. At least that is what he told himself.
Practically, Sam had no idea how he was going to actually be able to handle
that. The very thought of being on his own nearly sent him into a panic attack
every time he thought about it. He hadn’t handled money in years. He knew he
would have trouble in social situations. Sam also knew he had to find a place
to live and a job. He didn’t really have a practical knowledge of how to do
those things. He knew how to do it in theory but practically was a different
story. Sam knew he would need either his dad’s or Dean’s help. He hoped his dad
would help him, even though they haven’t spoken in years. Sam didn’t want to
ever see Castiel’s face after this was over and Dean was always with Castiel.
Gabriel had started to hit Sam. Sam didn’t really know why Gabriel started to
hit him but he knew he deserved it. It started after Castiel informed Gabriel
that he was torturing him. He was grateful Gabriel didn’t hit him hard.
Although, Sam knew his opinion of hard was probably skewed. Gabriel liked to
spank him or backhand him when he spoke out of term or did something wrong. Sam
tried to keep his mouth shut as a result. He barely spoke anymore and when he
did Sam tried to limit is answers to ‘Yes Master’ or ‘No Master.’ Sam blamed
Castiel for this latest development because if Castiel didn’t try to interfere
than he wouldn’t be getting hit.
Sometimes in the dark corners of Sam’s mind, he wondered if he should leave. He
wondered if maybe Gabriel would be nicer to him once he was free. He thought
that maybe he would be better off here. Gabriel kept him safe. Gabriel gave Sam
a home, food, attention, and for that all Sam had to do was obey him. Sam tried
not to think about his doubts.
Sam was pulled from his internal rambling by Gabriel’s voice from behind him.
Gabriel’s voice was playful which Sam knew was never good. “Sam, I have a
special treat for you today.” Sam turned and looked at Gabriel but did not make
eye contact. He didn’t say anything because Gabriel didn’t ask a question that
required an answer.
Gabriel watched Sam for a moment. Sam was sitting on the floor by the window in
the study like he did most days. Sam was only wearing a white t-shirt and his
boxers. Sam had a broken lip from where Gabriel got a little carried away face
fucking Sam. His eyes looked hollow and glassy. Sam wasn’t eating as much these
days and Gabriel had started to have to order Sam to eat or hand feed him. Even
then, Gabriel could see Sam’s reluctance to eat.
He wondered if he should try to be gentler to Sam. Gabriel knew that Sam was
generally well behaved. He thought that maybe he should start rewarding that
behavior differently. In the past year, Gabriel had been using sex to reward
Sam. But today he wanted to do something different. Happily Gabriel said, “Go
put some pants and shoes on. Then bring me your leash.”
Sam blinked a couple times at Gabriel before complying. He hated the leash. Sam
felt lower than a dog when Gabriel put him on a leash and Sam knew that Gabriel
did this for no other reason than to humiliate him. Sometimes, Sam thought
about how at one point in his life he wanted to die with dignity. Sam knew by
this point that he had absolutely no dignity left.
Sam slipped on his socks then he pulled on a pair of jeans. Finally he put on
his shoes. It felt strange to Sam to be dressed like this. He remembered
dressing like this but most days Sam didn’t bother anymore. Sam knew that
Gabriel was just going to strip him and the less clothes he wore the happier
Gabriel seemed to be. Still Sam liked to wear a t-shirt to cover up the scars
on his back. He thought they were ugly. He also liked to wear his boxers so at
least Gabriel would have some material to go through before he started touching
him.
Sam grabbed the leash off the dresser and headed back to Gabriel. He knelt down
in front of his master and held out the leash for him. Sam felt Gabriel take
the leash then attach it to his collar. Sam closed his eyes and focused on his
breathing. He felt Gabriel tug on the leash so he could stand. Sam let Gabriel
led him on the leash down the hallway, then down the stairs, and outside.
The sun hurt Sam’s eyes at first. He had forgotten how bright it was outside.
Sam lowered his head and stumbled slightly as he walked. He stared at his feet
as he walked and Sam soon realized they were walking on one of the trails by
Gabriel’s house. They had walked out here before but that was before Jessica
Moore caused him to loose what little privileges he had. Sam could not begin to
express how much he hated her.
Sam had no idea how long he walked with Gabriel. They stopped when they reached
a clearing. Gabriel sat down on the bench nearby and pulled Sam by the leash to
sit next to him. Sitting next to Gabriel was odd for Sam. It rarely happened
anymore. The only time in recent memory was during meals when Dean was
visiting. Sam didn’t look up at Gabriel he kept his gaze trained to the ground
while he focused on keeping his breathing steady.
Gabriel took a deep breath and said calmly, “I want to talk to you about
something.” He looked at Sam and he couldn’t see Sam’s face because his hair
was blocking the view. Gabriel lightly brushed Sam’s hair out of the way which
caused Sam to flinch slightly when he first touched him. Gabriel reached out a
hand and nudged Sam’s head up so Sam was looking at him. Sam was avoiding eye
contact. Gabriel frowned and said, “Sam, look at me.”
Sam looked up at Gabriel. It looked almost painful for Sam to look at him.
Gabriel let go of Sam’s face and said quietly, “I’m sorry, Sam. I’ve destroyed
everything that intrigued me about you. Worst of all, I don’t think you love
me. I think you fear me. You’re amazing in bed and a great cook which are your
saving graces. Anyways, I noticed that you haven’t written on one of your
postcards in over a year. I know you’re not happy.”
Sam took in Gabriel’s words. He could feel his breathing increase and he felt
like fear was clinching his heart. Sam wondered if this was Gabriel telling him
that he was going to get executed or thrown to the guards. Sam didn’t know if
speaking would help this situation or not so he remained quiet.
Gabriel frowned at Sam’s silence. He leaned forward and took the leash off Sam.
He sat the leash down in his lap. Then he said calmly, “I spoke to Pastor Jim
at the church you used to do your work at. He agreed for you to start going
there twice a week again. I think you need more social interaction. How do you
feel about that?”
Sam thought about that for a moment. He took a moment to gather his words. Sam
closed his eyes when he spoke. His voice was nervous and quiet, “I only wish to
please you, Master.” Sam felt like that was a nice, safe, and generic response.
The probably of him getting in trouble were low.
Gabriel huffed out an agitated breath and said, “Sam, please tell me what will
make you happy. What will make you open up to me? We used to have wonderful
conversations and I would like to get back to that.”
Sam didn’t know what would make him happy. He knew what he wanted to make his
life more bearable. Sam fiddled with his hands for a moment. Then he said with
trepidation because he was certain he was going to get hit. “You hurt me. I
don’t understand what I did to be punished so harshly. I know I must have
deserved it but I wish there was another way. I feel like I can’t please you.
I’m sorry, Master.”
Gabriel heard how difficult it was for Sam to say that and it did hurt a
little. He started to gently rub Sam’s back. He could still feel the scarred
skin through the t-shirt. Softly he asked, “What can I do better to make you
trust me?”
Sam chewed on his lip for a moment. Then he started crying. He had noticed that
he started crying rather easily these days. Sam wiped away his tears and braced
himself for a blow as he said, “I don’t want to get tied up or hit. I’ve never
ran away from you and I’ve never intentionally disobeyed you. I swear, Master.”
Gabriel nodded and he decided to try to give it a shot. Ruling Sam with an iron
fist was pushing Sam away so he hoped this would bring Sam closer to him.
Calmly Gabriel said, “We can try that.” He paused and decided to see how far he
could push Sam to comply. He had just given Sam a lot and he knew Sam would
probably do anything to keep it. Gabriel tapped Sam on the knee and said, “Take
off your clothes and get on the ground on all fours. I want to be the first
person to fuck you outside.”
++
Sam determined that outdoor sex was not his thing. He suspected it was in part
due to the lack of lube which caused it to hurt and he really didn’t like being
out in the open like that. Followed by Gabriel’s anger that Sam did not get
aroused. Sam tried to focus on something to cause his dick to rise to
attention, but nothing seemed to do the trick.
Sam was relieved that while Gabriel was angry with him for not getting aroused.
Gabriel didn’t hit him or put the leash back on him. Instead, Gabriel just
dragged him back to the mansion and made him kneel. Then Sam had to repeat for
hours how much he loved and appreciated everything his master gave him and most
importantly how he was sorry. By the end of it, Sam really did feel bad and he
was glad Gabriel took the time to punish him.
That was two days ago. Sam was now sitting next to Pastor Jim in his car as
they drove to the church. It was odd for Sam to see the outside world after
being inside for so long. It almost felt like a field trip or something. The
drive was nice and relaxing. The pastor had the radio playing softly and it
felt like something free people would do.
Once they were to the church, Sam got out of the car after Pastor Jim. He
followed the pastor inside and when they stopped. Sam was unsure of what to do.
He kept his gaze down. He heard Pastor Jim’s worried voice, “Sam, are you
okay?”
Sam nodded yes because the last time he talked out in public. He got in
trouble. He wasn’t about to go through that again. Sam started fiddling with
his hands as he kept his gaze down. Sam heard Pastor Jim’s gentle voice, “There
is someone here to see you.”
Sam felt his heart clench in fear. He knew he was going to get locked up again
and he didn’t want that. Sam took a step back from Pastor Jim as he continued
to toy with his hands to the point he was causing himself pain. Then Sam felt a
warmth on his shoulder. It was a hand and he tried to flinch away but it was of
no use. Then he heard a familiar low grumble, “Sammy?”
Sam took a moment to process that. Then he realized it was his dad. Sam looked
up and saw his dad’s face. He moved forward and hugged his father tightly. He
started to cry again, which Sam knew was something that annoyed his father. Sam
felt his dad hug back and he guided them so they were sitting.
John was surprised with how tall Sam had gotten. Dean had told him that Sam was
tall, but to see it in person was a completely different thing. He hadn’t
expected to see Sam. He was in the area on a hunt and Pastor Jim had mentioned
that Sam was coming over to the church. John had gotten permission from Gabriel
to see Sam because he didn’t want Sam to get in trouble.
John pulled back from Sam after a few minutes. He cupped Sam’s face in his
hands and he felt happy. John was concerned though because Sam thus far had
been non-verbal. John took a moment to steady himself then he said, “Sammy, how
are you doing?”
Sam whispered, “312 more days.” It was the only thing he could think to say. It
was the only thing that mattered to him. Sam was nearing the end and he hoped
that once it was over, he could have his family back.
John wasn’t sure what Sam was talking about. He knew Sam was getting closer to
his twenty-first birthday. It was clear to John that when Dean said Sam would
need a caregiver once he was free. It was the truth. John knew he had to stop
hunting and settle down somewhere. He knew Sam couldn’t deal with life on the
road.
John opened up his coat pocket and pulled out a couple of postcards and handed
them to Sam. He watched as his son took them and looked at them with suspicion.
 John gave a sad smile, “Sammy, ever since Dean found your postcards in your
duffel. I’ve been writing you on a postcard every year for your birthday. I
intended to put them by your grave one day, but now I can do something better.
I can give them to you now. Hopefully, it will make your remaining time a
little bit better.”
Sam nodded but didn’t say anything because his father didn’t ask a question.
Instead he turned over the postcards and started reading.
“Sammy, you would have been 15 today. Dean graduated high school and is going
to college. I have a legitimate job. I wish you were here and I wish you were
alive for me to share this with you. I miss you and I love you. Dad”
“Sammy, you’re 16 today. I wish I could see you. I am sure you are getting tall
and turning into a young man. I wish I could take you for drivers’ test but
that will have to wait. I am still working. I miss you and I love you. Dad.”
“Sammy, you’re 17 today. I wish I could see you or talk to you. I was thinking
today about how I miss our arguments. Most of the time, you were right but I
was too stubborn to admit it. I hope we get to have those times again. I love
you and I miss you. Dad.”
“Sammy, you’re 18 today. I wish I could welcome you to adulthood, but I think
you became a man 4 years ago. I regret not being with you for these last few
years, but I am glad at least Dean gets to see you. I love you and I miss you.
Dad.”
“Sammy, you’re 19 today. Dean tried to describe to me what you look like now
and I couldn’t quite picture it. I think you’ll always be that baby wrapped up
in a blanket to me. I miss you and I love you. Dad.”
“Sammy, you’re 20 today. Dean says you’re not doing well. I wish could be there
for you and make the pain go away. I never wanted this for you. I hope that if
you come back to us in a year, you’ll give me a chance to prove I can be a
better father. I love you and I miss you. Dad.”
Sam smiled at the cards and said nervously, "I love you too, Dad.”
 
***** Chapter 29 *****
Castiel fell asleep with Dean’s arms warped around him. It felt safe and he
felt himself drift into a dream.
Castiel was peering through the slots on the banister on the staircase. He
could see his mommy and she was crying. Castiel didn’t know why she was crying.
He could see his big brother, Lucifer, talking to her. He thought Lucifer
looked happy, which didn’t make sense.
Castiel stood up and his head did not even pass the top of the banister. He
quietly walked down the stairs to go comfort his mommy. As he got to the base
of the stairs, he heard his mommy’s strained voice, “Castiel, please go back
upstairs. It’s okay baby. Mommy loves you.”
Castiel tilted his head at his mother and Lucifer because he didn’t understand
what was going on. Lucifer smirked at him which made Castiel smile. He liked it
when Lucifer gave him attention. Then Lucifer knelt down in front of Castiel
and put his hand on Castiel’s shoulder. Castiel looked at his brother with wide
eyes. Then Lucifer said softly, “Castiel, I am going to strangle your mother.”
Castiel gave Lucifer a confused look and said, “I don’t get it.” He didn’t know
what the word strangle meant.
Lucifer smiled and said in the same soft tone, “Don’t worry little brother,
just sit right there and I will show you.”
Castiel nodded then he sat down where his brother asked him too. He gave a
curious look when Lucifer pulled out a short rope and his mommy started
begging, “Please not in front of Castiel.” He didn’t understand why his mommy
would beg like that. Lucifer said it was okay. Castiel watched as Lucifer
pulled his mommy to her knees.
His mommy has facing him as Lucifer put the rope around her neck. Castiel
watched as Lucifer tightened the rope around his mommy’s neck. It was then
Castiel realized that Lucifer was hurting his mommy. As his mommy’s face
started to turn a darker shade of red, Castiel jumped up and shouted, “Stop
Luci, hurting mommy!”
Lucifer winked at Castiel and said calmly, “I am just helping your mommy take a
long permanent nap.”
Castiel didn’t understand and he started to cry. His mommy couldn’t take a
forever nap. That would mean there would be no one to tuck him in and tell him
stories. Castiel didn’t want that. He wanted his mommy with him. Castiel
watched helplessly and he cried as his mommy went limp in Lucifer’s grasp. Then
Lucifer held tight for what seemed like hours before dropping his mommy on the
floor.
Castiel walked over to his mommy. She wasn’t moving anymore. Castiel laid down
next to her and put his little head on her chest. He couldn’t hear her
heartbeat anymore. It always gave him comfort, but now she was taking a forever
nap. Castiel heard Lucifer walk away from him and his mommy. So Castiel closed
his eyes and wiped away his tears. He put his arm around his mommy and held on.
Maybe she would wake up from her forever nap.
Castiel jolted awake with a nightmare. It had been one he had been having since
he was a small child. It was of the day Lucifer killed his mother and he had
spent years trying to convince himself it wasn’t real. He didn’t even know his
mother’s full name. All he knew is that her last name was Milton. He took a few
moments to steady his breathing. It was easier for him to calm down when Dean
held him.
Castiel never talked about his nightmares. He never told Dean about them.
Castiel knew that this murder was the triggering event for him not talking for
years. He didn’t know enough about his mother to know if she was close to her
twenty-first birthday or not. He didn’t even know if her family knew she had
twin boys. Castiel wasn’t entirely sure meeting them would be wise at this
point.
Gabriel was turning out to be just like his older brothers and Dean thought
Castiel was complacent to the treatment of the slaves. Castiel had no idea what
he would say to them. He had one memory of his mother and that was of her
getting murdered. Castiel figured it was probably better not to burden them. It
would likely be difficult for them to process. He figured at this point his
mother had been gone for over 20 years. To go to her family now would just be
digging up old ghosts for them.
Castiel stared at the ceiling and he started to drift back off to sleep.
++
Dean woke up before Cas. He looked at his boyfriend and realized he was
screwed. Dean knew that if Sammy chose to be free, it would likely mean the end
of his relationship with Castiel. He didn’t want to lose Cas but Sam was and
always had been more important to him. Currently, Dean was on a quest to get
Castiel to understand the impact slavery has on families. He wanted Cas to
understand that the damage done to Sam was not exclusive to him because he
lived. He wanted Cas to see that it could damage families as well.
It took some research and asking Gabriel, of all people, for help, but he
managed to find out the name of Castiel’s mother. Her name was Anna Milton. She
was an only child of Richard and Amy Milton. They are both still alive and they
have no idea they have grandchildren. Dean arranged to meet with them today.
Dean slowly started rubbing his hand up and down Castiel’s side and he
whispered, “Good morning, Cas.”
Castiel stirred and stretched. Then he opened his eyes and gave Dean a small
kiss. Castiel sleepily replied back, “Morning, Dean. Did you sleep well?”
Dean smiled and nodded, “I did Cas. I heard you have another nightmare.”
Cas frowned and said simply, “It was nothing.”
Dean rolled his eyes and said seriously, “You know, someday you’re going to
have to talk to someone about that. However, today I have a surprise that is
going to piss you off.”
Cas threw his arm over his face and groaned. His voice was muffed when he
asked, “What?”
Dean grinned and shrugged, “Well, Gabriel helped me but I was able to track
down your maternal grandparents. They don’t know you’re their grandson. Only
that you’re Castiel Novak. Gabriel should be here around noon to go with you.”
Castiel started rubbing his hands over his face and grumbled, “Fine, if nothing
else you should get to spend some time with Sam.”
++
Castiel and Gabriel arrived at the Milton residence at 3 PM. It was a bright
day outside and Cas could feel his nerves. It felt like a tightness in his
stomach that couldn’t be soothed. Gabriel looked perfectly calm and they had
not spoken on the drive. They had left Sam with Dean at Castiel’s home. Castiel
didn’t care what they did as long as Dean did something to put a smile on Sam’s
face.
Castiel followed Gabriel up to the door to the Milton’s home and Gabriel
knocked on the door. After a couple minutes an older man with grey hair
answered the door. He gave them an obviously fake smile and Castiel returned
the smile with an equally fake smile.  The man said nervously, “Good afternoon
sirs, please come in.”
Gabriel frowned and said calmly, “Thank you, Mr. Milton.” They stepped inside
the house and it looked somewhat like the stereotypical older person’s home. It
was cluttered with mismatched furniture from decades ago. There were pictures
on the wall of a red haired girl. Gabriel could vaguely recognize her as their
mother. However, in the pictures on the wall she looked younger.
Once they were inside and the door was closed. Gabriel reached out his hand to
shake Richard Milton’s hand. Richard did not extend his hand back to shake so
Gabriel pulled his hand away. Gabriel frowned and said in a collected voice.
“Mr. Milton, it is nice to meet you. My name is Gabriel Novak and this is my
twin brother, Castiel.”
Richard nodded and said with some agitation, “It is nice you meet both of you,
sir. I understand you wanted to talk about how your family took and murdered my
only child.”
Castiel gave Richard a sympathetic look. He was straightforward when he spoke,
“Yes, we would like to discuss that with you and find out more about Anna
Milton. We seek to understand what it is the families go through. The only
family we have been around is that of Gabriel’s personal slave. By a fluke, my
significant other is his slave’s brother.”
Richard scuffed before recovering his somewhat polite composure. “How sweet. I
don’t know what you want to know about our Anna.”
Castiel gave a reassuring smile and he said simply, “Well, how old was she when
you lost her and what was she like?”
Richard sat down and motioned for them to both sit down. Carefully, Castiel and
Gabriel sat down next to each other. Richard sighed then he gave a smile and
looked lost somewhere in the past as he spoke, “Anna was 14. She was just a
child. She wasn’t even a woman yet. Anna was very religious. She believed God
had a plan for everyone and she wanted to stay pure until marriage. That was
very important to her. Aside from God and her commitment to help others. Anna
tolerated school and she had a few close friends.”
Gabriel smiled and realized that Anna sounded like the polar opposite of them.
He wondered something. Carefully he asked, “Was she religiously conservative?
Did she believe homosexuality was a sin, things like that?”
Richard shrugged and said nervously, “She was rather conservative in her
beliefs. Anna had this idea that a marriage should be to serve God and not
yourself.” Richard shook his head and wiped away a tear, “No matter how hard I
tried I couldn’t talk sense into her about that. I used to tell her that
serving God means being happy in your marriage. I used to tell her that God
wants his children to be happy.”
Gabriel rolled his eyes and said calmly, “Excuse me for being blunt, but how
did you feel about her becoming a slave and her subsequent death?”
Richard gave a distant look and said brokenly, “It was the worst day of my
life. It felt like my world just ended. She was taken in 1976 and we had to
wait 7 years to get her ashes back. I held out hope that we would get her back
alive. Amy had heard rumors that she had been seen at the palace. We thought
there was really a chance. When we got her ashes, it brought closure but in a
way it felt like we lost her all over again.
“I just wish this never happened to her. I wish I could have traded places with
her or protected her. I regret not being able to watch her become a young
woman, get married, and have a couple kids.”
Gabriel nodded as Richard spoke. All of this sounded very similar to what John
and Dean thought about the situation with his Sam. He was calm when he spoke,
“Mr. Milton, my brother and I asked to come speak with you for a very specific
reason.” He paused and then continued, “Castiel and I are her children.”
Richard looked from Castiel to Gabriel a couple times before breaking down. He
sobbed for a few moments. Then he asked through his tears, “Do you remember
her?”
Castiel gave Richard a sad look and said quietly, “I am afraid, I only have one
memory of my mother and it was not pleasant. It was when she died. I remember
loving her and thinking she was the most important thing in the universe. Then
she was just gone.”
Gabriel frowned at Castiel. He hated how that was all his brother could
remember. His memory wasn’t much better though. Calmly Gabriel said, “I
remember her tucking us in at night. She would always say, ‘Sleep tight, my
little angels. Mommy loves you.’ I remember that I would scowl at her when she
called us angels.” Gabriel gave a small laugh and said, “I wish she didn’t
die.”
Richard nodded and said slowly, “So you’re my grandsons.” He smiled and
frowned. “I heard that the slaves get tortured. I know it is out of term for me
to ask, but have either of you done that?”
Castiel glared at Gabriel as he spoke, “I haven’t. However, I can’t say the
same for Gabriel. I chose not to take a slave for personal reasons. I don’t
need servants and I wanted to fall in love like everyone else.”
Gabriel rolled his eyes and said calmly, “I have two household slaves at my
mansion and I have one personal slave. My guards handle the household slaves.
They do the housework. My personal slave tends to me in every way. I have had
to punish him before and Castiel believes I tortured him. Sam will be 21 in
about six months. I am hoping he will stay with me after he comes of age as my
spouse.”
Castiel continued to glare a Gabriel then he said with reservation, “Gabriel’s
slave, Sam, is the younger brother of my boyfriend. I started dating my
boyfriend after Sam became a slave. He didn’t know I was a Novak and I didn’t
know he had a brother that was a slave. It was difficult for both of us to work
past that.”
Richard nodded and said quietly, “I think she would still love you both even
though you’re gay. I think I can speak for Amy on this and we would really like
to know both of you better.” He paused and said gently, “Gabriel, as your
grandfather, I have to ask that whatever you’re doing to treat Sam poorly that
you stop. Not for me, but for your mother. I know she would have never wanted
you to do that.”
++
It was late when Castiel and Gabriel returned to Castiel’s home. They were
greeted by Dean playing cards with Sam. It was bittersweet for Castiel because
he could see Sam tense up as soon as they walked in. Castiel watched them
finish their game of cards. He noticed that Sam didn’t say a word throughout
the remainder of the game. He would point or nod if he wanted something. Dean
seemed to pick up on what Sam wanted or needed.
Castiel listened as Dean pretended to carry on a conversation with Sam. He knew
that Sam would have a long road to recovery and he couldn’t help but wonder if
Sam talked to Dean when no one else was around. Cas knew that Dean never shared
what he talked to Sam about when they had a chance to have a private
conversation. Sometimes he wondered if they were planning for the future or if
Sam was opening up to Dean about his life. Castiel didn’t know and he knew he
would probably never know.
After Gabriel and Sam left that evening. Dean shook his head and said quietly,
“Sammy’s doing better, I think.”
Castiel turned and looked at Dean. He tilted his head at Dean as if Dean had
somehow lost his mind. Bluntly Castiel said, “Dean, your brother is non-verbal
and he was almost shaking when Gabriel walked back in the room.”
Dean shrugged and said casually, “I know, but he was better when Gabriel wasn’t
around. Sam is terrified of Gabriel.”
Castiel nodded and said simply, “I know. I’m sorry.”
Dean gave a sad smile and said, “How did your visit go?”
Castiel shrugged and said, “Okay, I guess. We only spoke to Richard Milton. He
asked that Gabriel stop being a dick to Sam. He wanted to know what we
remembered about our mother. Gabriel invited them to dinner at his mansion in a
few months. He accepted so we will see how that goes.” Castiel paused and
added, “You were right, Dean. The pain they feel is similar to what you and
your father are going through with Sam. It hurts to know my mother was treated
worse than Sam. I wish things could be different.”
Dean sighed and said, “I know. Let me show you a piece of who Sammy was.” Dean
pulled one of Sam’s postcards out of his book bag. Castiel knew Dean must have
selected this card for a reason. Castiel looked at the front of the card and it
had an airplane on it. He figured it was probably from a museum or something.
Castiel flipped over the card to see what Dean’s little brother wrote.
“I met a slave today at the museum and she helped me find Dad but she got hit
by a mean man for helping me. I will miss being able to ask people for help. I
don’t want anyone to get hurt because of me.”
It was then Castiel understood something. Something that should have been clear
to him from the start. All of these slaves had feelings and sometimes tried to
do the right thing. The slave that Sam encountered as a child knowingly took a
punishment to help a lost child find his family. Castiel found that honorable
and wrong that she would get punished to begin with. Castiel started to think
that maybe he should try to do more. He didn’t know what he could do exactly,
but something. 
***** Chapter 30 *****
Sam was sitting by the window in the study where Gabriel left him chained.
Tomorrow was his twenty-first birthday. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that
because it meant change. Gabriel wasn’t home so it was just him. Castiel and
Dean were expected sometime that afternoon. He had not told Gabriel his
decision. Although, Dean knew his decision.
The past few months have been confusing for Sam. Gabriel had been nicer to him
at times. Sam wasn’t getting hit anymore and Gabriel had stopped sexual
activities if it became apparent Sam wasn’t interested. Sam had been having an
increasingly difficult time getting in the mood for sex. Most of the time, it
left him feeling dirty and ashamed.
Sam had been tied up a few times since he asked not to be. He knew it was for
his own good. Gabriel put him on a leash when he met Mr. and Mrs. Milton. Sam
didn’t speak to them but he could hear that they seemed a little put off by
Gabriel. He was uneasy around Mrs. Milton. She wanted to help him prepare
dinner and she tried to talk to him. Sam didn’t say anything to her. He just
gave her small nods and little smiles. Sam did not want to say anything to get
punished.
He did find it interesting when Mrs. Milton talked about her daughter. Sam
thought she sounded like a nice woman, but he never told Mrs. Milton that. Sam
thought Anna sounded like a generous and good person, who always put others
before herself. He wished he could have met her and Sam thought that maybe if
Gabriel had his mother in his life. Gabriel wouldn’t be like this.
Sam also wondered how his father and brother would describe him. Somehow, he
doubted they would speak as kindly about him. Sam never felt like he was good
at anything. He knew he never lived up to his father’s standards and he always
felt like more of burden. Sam felt like he was always the third wheel. He never
knew he was valued by his dad or Dean until he became a slave. It was only then
he found out they loved him too.
He was pulled from his thoughts by Castiel’s voice. Castiel was calm and
collected, “Sam, it is good to see you. Is Gabriel home?”
Sam turned to look at Castiel. He saw Dean next to him. Dean looked upset for
some reason. Sam wondered if he had done anything to upset Dean or Castiel and
he couldn’t think of anything. He made sure to clean their room the day before.
Sam lowered his head and shook his head no. He added a quiet, “No Sir,” to be
on the safe side.
Castiel was shocked to see Sam literally chained to the wall. He knew Gabriel
did it on purpose to get a rise out of him. Castiel walked over to Sam and
knelt down. Before he reached out to Sam, he gently said, “Sam, you might feel
me touching you around your neck. All I am doing is removing the chain from
your collar so you can interact with Dean and I better. You won’t be in trouble
with Gabriel. Do you understand?”
Sam quietly said, “Yes Sir.” He hoped Castiel did get permission from Gabriel
to remove the chain. Sam didn’t want to think about what Gabriel would do if he
was caught moving around the house without permission. Sam thought there was
nothing worse than the time Gabriel had Sam drugged so he couldn’t move his
body but he was still awake. He felt trapped inside his own mind and Sam never
wanted to experience that again.
Castiel reached out and unhooked the chain. He carefully sat it on the floor
away from Sam. He wanted to throw the thing across the room but he didn’t want
to startle Sam. This was the first time Dean had ever witnessed Gabriel
treating Sam poorly. Castiel knew Dean was going to be angry. After taking a
couple moments to prepare himself, Castiel looked up at Dean. Much to his
surprise, Dean didn’t look angry. He just looked sad.
Dean never wanted to see what Gabriel did to Sam behind closed doors. He wanted
to believe that everything was okay when he went to work, out on a date, and
just lived his life. Now, he stared at the fact that Sam was treated like a
slave or an animal. Dean wasn’t really sure how to classify it. Then he heard
how gently Castiel talked to Sam. It was almost like Castiel knew Sam would
fear punishment from Gabriel and he was trying to stop that fear.
After Sam was unchained from the wall, Dean watched silently as Castiel helped
Sam stand. Then Dean did the only thing he could do in this situation. He
walked over to Sam and gave him a hug. Dean whispered in Sam’s ear, “I love
you, baby brother.”
++
Gabriel arrived home a couple hours later and Sam was somewhat relieved that
Gabriel didn’t seem angry with him. They had an early birthday dinner at home
complete with cake. Sam started shaking when his birthday candles wouldn’t go
out. He thought for sure he was going to get in trouble for not being able to
blow out a basic candle. It wasn’t until Sam heard Gabriel laughing that he
understood, it was a joke. The candles were not meant to blow out.
Over dinner, Sam listened to how Dean’s job is going. He listened to Gabriel
talk about how wonderful his life is here. He listened as Gabriel talked about
how Sam isn’t hungry anymore, how he is cared for, and how he is given what he
needs. Dean had a different reserved opinion and the whole exchange left Sam
feeling confused and questioning himself.
Sam was currently in the bedroom he shared with Gabriel. He was sitting on the
edge of the bed and he could feel Gabriel’s hands starting to caress his chest.
Sam closed his eyes with the touch and tried to focus on what Gabriel was
doing. He wanted to please his master.
Sam felt Gabriel start to nip at his ear. Then he heard Gabriel whisper, “Sam,
this is your last night as a slave. Tomorrow, you’ll get to be a prince like
your master.” He felt Gabriel start to suck on his earlobe and it made Sam
shudder. Sam didn’t say anything because there was nothing to say to Gabriel’s
lust filled statement.
Gabriel started to suck a hickey into the side of Sam’s neck. He rubbed his
hands across Sam’s chest as he sucked. Once he was satisfied it would leave a
nice mark, he pulled back. He whispered, “Mmm, I love marking you up.” He gave
a slight tug to Sam’s collar which caused Sam to try to expose more of his neck
to Gabriel. Then Gabriel asked, “Part of me wants you to continue wearing this
collar. Do you know why?”
Sam honestly wasn’t sure and he knew better than to make assumptions.
Submissively Sam said, “No Master.” He felt a fear rising inside of him that
Gabriel was somehow going to make it so he wouldn’t be free tomorrow. He had
never heard of that happening, but he knew better than to underestimate a
Novak. Sam felt Gabriel start to suck another hickey in his neck. So far,
despite what Sam was sure was some of Gabriel’s best efforts, Sam had not
become aroused. That wasn’t terribly unusual for Sam.
Sam found that his constant fear of punishment or worse killed his libido. He
found himself more likely to tremble in fear around Gabriel than he was to want
to have sex. Sometimes, Sam wondered what happened and where things went wrong.
Gabriel used to respect him sexually and didn’t push. Gabriel was gentle in bed
and it made Sam want to give Gabriel everything and more. Now, Sam had to think
back to remember that because if he didn’t he thought for sure it would skew
his view of his master. Sam was scared of Gabriel’s wrath but he couldn’t bring
himself to hate Gabriel. He knew that deep down he loved Gabriel. His master
had given him everything.
Gabriel finished sucking another hickey onto Sam’s neck before responding. He
kissed the newly formed hickey. Then he whispered, “I like you being my
property. You were born to be property. I don’t want you to ever forget that.”
Gabriel started to kiss around Sam’s neck and he could feel Sam tremble under
him. He felt down to Sam’s crotch to find out if Sam was trembling in fear or
arousal. A quick grope confirmed that Sam was afraid.
Gabriel picked another spot on Sam’s neck and started to suck another hickey.
He had no idea what Sam was going to choose tomorrow. He knew Castiel had
insisted on being there with Dean which made him suspicious. Gabriel knew that
if Sam opted to be free there would be nothing he could do to stop Sam from
leaving with Dean. He knew that Castiel would make sure he didn’t lay a hand on
Sam.
Gabriel hoped that Sam would stay with him. He liked having Sam in his life and
he knew that by Sam being alive it would help the publics’ growing negative
opinion of slavery. There had been a lot of recent public outrage over the
number of deaths and the social burden of caring for former slaves. Most former
slaves had mental health issues that made employment difficult.
Once the hickey was nicely formed on Sam’s neck he whispered to Sam. “What do
you want me to do to you tonight? I want to show my slave how special he is to
me.”
Sam replied with an automatic, “Whatever pleases you, Master. I am yours.” He
tried not to think about the endless list of things Gabriel could do to him.
Gabriel grinned. He sucked another hickey into Sam’s neck on his spine and
asked, “What if I branded you as mine, made you wear the mark of a slave for
the rest of your life?”
Sam undoubtedly did not want that. He thought he was mutilated enough, but he
knew that damage came from the guards not from Gabriel. The guards had left
permanent marks on him but his own master had not.  Sam could see how that was
unfair and he could understand why his master would want that. Quietly Sam
said, “I’m yours to do with as you please, Master.”
Gabriel hummed. Then he pulled Sam back by his hair and sucked a hickey into
the front of Sam’s throat. He felt Sam tense when he gave this hickey. Gabriel
knew it was sensitive there for Sam and underneath all of the training he had
done, the child hunter was still there. Gabriel knew that child hunter would
want to keep everything away from his throat. It pleased Gabriel that Sam
wouldn’t stop him even if he was clearly uncomfortable.
Gabriel licked the side of Sam’s neck and asked, “What if I made you dress up
like a girl? I bet you would look nice in a pair of panties. Maybe, I could put
some bows in your hair and paint your nails pink.”
For some reason, the idea of being forced to be like a girl or woman terrified
Sam. He wasn’t entirely sure why either. It was just clothing. Maybe it was a
lifetime of gender roles taught to him at an early age or the fact that Dean
had always teased him about being a girl. Sam knew that prior to him becoming a
slave, Dean thought Sam was sensitive and Dean liked to call him princess. Sam
had no idea what Dean thought now. Every time they were alone together, Sam
knew he would end up balling in Dean’s arms while Dean held him and told him it
was okay. Dean hadn’t made a single jab at Sam’s breakdowns or sensitivity
since he became a slave. Sam thought about how Dean would always tell him how
brave and strong he was. Sam hoped Dean was telling him the truth.
In the end though, Sam knew he had to give Gabriel an answer that pleased him.
He also knew that if Gabriel wanted to dress him up like a girl there was
nothing he could do or say to stop it. Nervously, Sam said, “I’m yours, Master.
You may do with me as you please.”
Gabriel chuckled then he licked along the exposed region between Sam’s neck and
shoulder. Then he bit down hard. He felt Sam’s blood fill his mouth and he felt
Sam go ridged. He heard a gargled moan of pain from Sam. He knew Sam was trying
to hold back the sounds of his discomfort. Gabriel bit down a little harder and
he could feel Sam’s flesh breaking under his teeth. It made Gabriel feel
powerful and he liked it. He knew he was hurting Sam by biting him like this
but Sam didn’t offer any resistance.
Gabriel pulled back from Sam and saw the blood slowly pour out of the wound. He
licked it and sucked some more of the blood out. Gabriel didn’t particularly
like the coopery taste of the blood, but it was what gave Sam life and if felt
nice to be able to control that. He watched in amusement as blood trickled down
Sam’s chest and neck for a few moments.
Then Gabriel tilted Sam’s head to the other side. Once again he licked the
junction between Sam’s neck and shoulder. Then Gabriel bit down. He bit down
harder this time to start off and he felt the blood pour out of his mouth.
Gabriel heard Sam whimper and beg, “Master please.” Gabriel smiled as he
continued to bit down.
After a few moments he pulled off of Sam’s neck. He looked over to the other
side and saw a heavy trail of blood that had soaked Sam’s pants. Gabriel could
see that the bite on the other side was likely going to bleed out just as bad
and he had a feeling both sides needed stitches. He lightly kissed the back of
Sam’s neck. Then he whispered, “Are you denying your master, Sam?”
Sam felt is body weave in nausea and dizziness. He didn’t know how much blood
he had lost but it was making him feel bad. Now, he had spoken out of term and
Sam knew he had to provide Gabriel with an explanation. Sam took a deep breath
and said with fear, “No Master, I’m yours. I only wish to please you.”
Gabriel grinned and had a sudden terribly erotic image flash before his eyes.
He decided that he was going to live out his fantasy because there is no time
like the present. Lowly he said, “Sam get on the floor on your knees. I want to
watch you suck my dick while you bleed from the bite marks.”
Sam obediently got off the bed and went to his knees. He waited for Gabriel to
get himself into position. Then Sam leaned forward with his head. He gingerly
undid the buckle and started to pull down the zipper on Gabriel’s pants with
his teeth like he was taught. Sam wasn’t sure why Gabriel liked this so much.
Sam had never gotten his dick sucked, but from what he had been able to gather
from Gabriel is it felt good.
Sam nuzzled at Gabriel’s crotch until he got Gabriel’s dick free. He gave
Gabriel a nice lick from top to bottom. Then he started sucking. Gabriel liked
him to suck hard from top to bottom in a steady and consistent motion. In the
porn, Gabriel had made Sam watch Sam saw a lot more teasing with this activity.
Sam knew Gabriel didn’t like teasing, so he focused his breathing as he worked
up and down Gabriel’s cock.
As he sucked, Sam noticed that his head was starting to feel fuzzier. He knew
he was dizzy and nauseous when he started this activity. Sam knew it was
getting worse. His vision was starting to go dark and he was starting to feel
his fingertips tingle. Sam loosened up his suction on his master’s cock in an
attempt to keep himself from passing out.
He felt Gabriel’s hand go into his hair. Then he felt Gabriel start to thrust
his head back and forth on his cock. The motion gave Sam a feeling of whiplash
and he started to choke on Gabriel’s cock. Sam felt drool roll off his chin and
his vision was almost completely gone. He felt the tingle in his fingertips
spread up his arms. He felt a knot in his chest then he felt like he couldn’t
stay awake anymore. Sam struggled to stay awake and stay focused on his master.
But in the end he failed. Sam felt a warmth of peace wash over him as he passed
out with his master’s cock in his mouth.
Gabriel felt Sam go limp under him and he wasn’t expecting Sam to pass out. It
irritated him and he was close. Gabriel tightened his hold on Sam’s hair and he
continued thrusting in and out of Sam’s mouth until he climaxed. He came in
Sam’s mouth and over Sam’s face. Gabriel then pulled Sam away from him then the
let go of Sam’s head. He watched as Sam’s unconscious body fell to the floor.
Gabriel tucked himself back in as he stared at Sam. He could tell Sam had lost
a lot of blood but the flow was slowing to a stop. Gabriel couldn’t see the
rise and fall of Sam’s chest or hear the sound of Sam’s breathing. He reached
down and picked up Sam’s wrist. Gabriel felt around and found Sam’s weak but
steady pulse. Gabriel knew Sam was going to be okay.
++
Sam woke up slowly. He felt pain. His head throbbed and he just hurt everywhere
from his chest up. Sam felt cold and wet. He slowly opened his eyes and
realized the lights were on and Gabriel was sitting in a chair watching him.
Carefully Sam pulled himself up and he saw that he was covered in blood. He
felt his face and judging by the taste in his mouth Sam thought it was dried
semen. Sam found that disgusting.
He looked around and he could see where blood had gotten on the carpet. Sam
cringed at that because cleaning blood out of the carpet was difficult and it
looked like there as a lot of it. He looked over at his master and said
quietly, “Thank you for using me, Master.” Sam reached up and felt one of the
bite marks. It felt very open to him and Sam knew that it would need to be
stitched up to heal properly. He was suddenly overcome with a desire for Dean
to help him but he knew that wasn’t possible. Dean had never been able to save
him from this.
Gabriel smiled at Sam. He handed Sam a postcard and an ink pen. He was aware
that Sam’s hands were bloody but he didn’t care. Calmly Gabriel commanded,
“This is your last night as a slave, Sam. Write something.”
Sam looked down at the card and tried to focus his thoughts but his head hurt
so much. He took a couple of deep breaths as he gathered what he wanted to say.
He wanted to make sure he said something that did not piss Gabriel off.
“The chapter of my life where I am a slave is coming to a close. I learnt how
to serve, submit, cherish, and love my Master. I will miss the simplicity of
knowing that my place in the world is at my Master’s feet.”  
***** Chapter 31 *****
Dean wasn’t sure why Castiel insisted that he be here for Sam’s twenty-first
birthday. It wasn’t like Dean didn’t care about Sam’s birthdays. It was just he
would rather not be around when Sam made the choice to stay with Gabriel. He
wasn’t happy when Sam told him that was what he was going to do. Dean knew
Sam’s relationship with Gabriel was far from healthy.
However, Dean knew there was not much he could say to change Sam’s mind. He did
find the conversation interesting though because as it turned out Sam thought
he was useless. Sam very eloquently pointed out how Sam felt that he had been a
burden to his family prior to becoming a slave. He pointed out how they were
hungry and essentially homeless most of the time. Dean tried to tell Sam that
none of that was a reflection on Sam and it was their father’s poor coping
mechanism after his son was offered up to a demon.
That seemed to be the wrong thing to say because Sam used that as a point for
him not belonging in the Winchester family unit. Sam noticed how things were
more stable once he left. Dean tried to tell him that they were doing these
things for Sam, but his little brother was still stubborn. It was actually kind
of nice to know that Sam could still be stubborn. Dean just didn’t want Sam to
be stubborn about this.
He tried to tell Sam that Sam was always his number one priority in life. It
turned out that was the wrong thing to say. Sam helpfully explained in detail,
with the hurt clearly evident his voice, all the times he had been tortured (or
punished as Sam liked to call it) at the hands of Gabriel or the guards. Of
course, Sam being Sam didn’t stop with the last seven years of traumatic life
experiences. Sam went back before that. He mentioned all the times he got extra
training drills for mouthing off to their dad. All the times, he got verbally
beat down for putting school or a social life before hunting.
What hurt Dean the most is, when Sam talked about how he felt like he had never
been accepted for who he was until he became a slave. Dean found out that Sam
had felt like a freak his entire life because of what the demon tried to do to
him. Sam felt unworthy of love because even his mother didn’t love him. Dean
couldn’t argue that point. Mary didn’t love Sam and Dean wished he could
perform her execution. It didn’t escape Dean’s knowledge that their mother, who
was locked away for supernatural crimes, could be executed by Sam if Gabriel
took Sam as his spouse.
Dean could understand that need for revenge, even though Sam didn’t say he
wanted to do that. He remembered quite well when they were growing up how well-
meaning people would say stuff to Sam like, “There is nothing greater than a
mother’s love.”Or “There isn’t anything a mother wouldn’t do for her
child.”Dean was fairly certain that was true 90% of the time. It was just their
mother didn’t share that mindset which Dean knew caused Sam to feel like
something was missing.
Their dad admittedly did not help matters any. They got carted around the
country and lived well below the poverty line. Their father always seemed to
have money for whiskey, even if they didn’t have money for food. Dean knew Sam
remembered that. It was one of the things John and Sam used to get into fights
about. Sam was absolutely right but Dean being the good son always defended
John. Now, Dean wished he would have taken Sam’s side.
Dean wished he did a lot of things different. Up to and including telling Sam
that he loved him prior to Sam becoming a slave. Dean just couldn’t say the
words before and neither could their dad. It made Dean wonder sometimes, if
Gabriel was the first person in Sam’s memory to say that he loved Sam. He
wished he could go back and change that now. He wished he could tell Sam he
loved him every day. Hell, Dean was certain that he would tell Sam he loved him
no less than three times a day to the point where it annoyed Sam.
Currently, Dean was laying be bed with Castiel, who was somehow sleeping
soundly. He could hear faintly Gabriel doing something to Sam. Dean had no idea
what and after seeing Sam chained to the wall earlier in the day, he didn’t
want to know. He just hoped Gabriel wasn’t hurting Sam, however judging by the
muffled sounds, Dean had a sinking feeling Sam was getting hurt. Dean just
hoped Sam wasn’t getting hurt because Castiel unchained him from the wall. Dean
paused when he thought about that, because of all the things to think. That
cemented in his mind how completely messed up this situation was.
Dean heard a loud crash come from Gabriel’s room and if Dean’s hunter instincts
were correct, it sounded like a person hit the floor. More specifically, it
sounded like Sam just hit the floor again. Dean groaned and he wasn’t sure if
it was the noise or his groaning that woke Castiel.
Castiel shifted in bed. He had been hearing Gabriel undoubtedly hurting Sam all
night. This was the second crash Castiel had heard and he was not happy about
it. Cas looked over at the clock on the nightstand. It read 3:14 AM.
Technically, Sam was now twenty-one and free to make a choice. Cas decided to
go knock on Gabriel’s door to put an end to this one way or another.
He sat up and looked at Dean. His boyfriend looked pale and he could see Dean’s
worry lines. Cas gave Dean a quick peck on the lips them he said quietly, “I am
going to go talk to Gabriel. This is ridiculous.”
Dean focused on Cas for a moment and he let out a defeated sigh. “Why?” Dean
asked. “Sam told me he was going to stay with Gabriel. It is never going to end
until Sam is dead.”
Castiel rolled his eyes. He had a sneaking suspicion that Sam lied to Dean
about wanting to stay with Gabriel. Well, he hoped Sam lied. Otherwise, Sam had
a serious case of Stockholm syndrome that he could do nothing to fix.
Castiel got out of bed and adjusted his clothes to make sure he was decent.
Then he padded down the hallway to Gabriel’s room. He stopped outside the door
and listened for a moment. There were no words being exchanged. All he could
hear was a dull thud. Castiel took a deep breath and knocked loudly on the
door. He said with as much force as he could muster at 3 am. “Gabriel, I want
to talk to you.”
Castiel waited patiently for Gabriel to open the door. He heard some shifting
and after a couple moments Gabriel opened the door. His brother was only
wearing sleep pants and there was blood on Gabriel’s hands and some around his
mouth. Castiel cast a sideways glance and saw Sam laying on the floor bleeding.
Sam’s eyes were open and facing the door, but his eyes were vacant and he just
looked dead. Castiel could see various wounds on Sam’s body but there was so
much blood he couldn’t make out the extent of Sam’s injuries or if Sam was even
still alive to worry about that.
Gabriel quirked an eyebrow at Castiel. He had been enjoying his last night with
Sam and he let loose like Lucifer and Michael had always told him too. Gabriel
felt alive and powerful with what he was doing. However, now that he was
looking at Castiel, he felt ashamed. Castiel’s face was a mix of horror and
disgust. It made Gabriel feel like he let Castiel down and he knew he had let
Castiel down.
He remembered the pack they made has children to never end up like their
brothers. Gabriel knew he broke that pack. He knew he had become exactly like
his brothers. Gabriel knew it was fueled by jealously. He had feelings for Sam
and he didn’t like it when anyone else saw something in Sam. So he kept Sam
away from everyone. He punished Sam the one time a girl took an interest in
him. If Gabriel was honest with himself, he just wanted to keep Sam for
himself. If he was honest with himself, he knew that tonight was just his way
of making it so if he couldn’t have Sam neither could anyone else. Gabriel knew
he was selfish and that he deserved anything Castiel was going to say to him.
Castiel pushed past Gabriel and knelt down beside Sam. He shot a hateful look
back at his brother and said sternly, “Sign the papers to free him.” He turned
back to Sam and he was surprised to hear the movement of paper. He hoped that
Gabriel was actually doing as he asked. If nothing else, Castiel wanted Sam to
be able to die a free man rather than a slave. He knew Sam would never know,
but Cas thought it would make a difference to Dean and John.
Castiel put a hand on Sam’s neck and he breathed a sigh of relief. Sam had a
very faint pulse. He got up and grabbed some towels from the bathroom. He
started to apply pressure to some of the wounds when he heard Dean’s strained
voice, “Sammy? You bastard, what did you do to him?”
Gabriel looked over at Sam for a moment and then he looked down. He knew there
was no point in defending himself. Instead, he handed Dean the paperwork to
free Sam. Then he said with shame in his voice, “I will call the doctor or an
ambulance, whatever you prefer.”
Castiel looked up and said calmly, “I may only be in my residency but I am a
doctor. We don’t have time to wait for either of those options. Gabriel, can
you bring the extended first aid kit to my room?” Gabriel nodded and left the
room. Castiel sighed and glanced over at Dean. He saw Dean tightly clutching
the paperwork for Sam. Cas breathed out a slow breath and said, “Dean, can you
help me carry him to our room?”
++
Dean stared in nervousness and partly shock as Castiel worked on Sam. He did
have to play blood donor for his little brother but he didn’t mind. He was
serious when he told Cas to take all of his blood if he needed to, if it meant
Sam would live. In the end, Castiel only took one pint of blood. Dean was
actually kind of impressed with the medical supplies they just had laying
around the house.
He had no idea why that surprised him. Dean knew the Novaks would avoid going
to the hospital if at all possible. He looked at the IV coming out of Sam’s
arm. His little brother had one bag for fluids and one of his blood. Dean knew
Castiel put shots of something into the bag of fluid but he didn’t ask what. He
trusted Castiel. He wasn’t sure if that was wise or not, but he did.
From what Dean could see, Sam had a lot of dried come on him. Including in his
hair and on his face. Dean made a mental note to wash that off of Sam once Cas
declared him stable and never speak of it. He could see seven deep bite marks
on Sam which Castiel was in the process of stitching up. There were bites in
between Sam’s neck and shoulder on each side. There as a bite on the underside
each of Sam’s pecks, one on each side of his abdomen and one Sam’s right wrist.
Dean could also see bruising from where Sam had been hit along his chest and
abs. Castiel seemed to focus on Sam’s right arm for a few moments but didn’t
declare anything broken. Sam did have a ton of hickeys of various ages on him.
The thought made Dean sick, but he knew letting his own feelings get in the way
wouldn’t help matters any.
The injury that made Dean felt the worst was the brand. It was on the side of
Sam’s neck and there was no way Sam would ever be able to hide it. Dean could
clearly see the shape of the Novak family crest and the initials ‘GN’ under it.
Gabriel had marked Sam for life and Sam despite being free. He would see that
every time he looked in the mirror.
It felt like hours but Dean knew it wasn’t that long before Castiel finally
declared Sam stable. He knew it hadn’t been hours because the sun still had not
started to peek through the windows. Dean sat down on a chair he pulled next to
the bed. He sat a bowl with water and a wash cloth on the stand next to the
bed. Then Dean started to wipe the blood and come off of Sam’s body. His
brother wasn’t awake, but he was alive and free.
Dean talked as he wiped away the blood, “Sammy, I don’t know what you want to
do after you wake up but I want to get out of here. You’ve never seen my
apartment, but I think you’ll like it. It’s only a two bedroom but you can have
one of the rooms. We can set it up however you want.” Dean gave a humorless
laugh and said, “I bet you’ll want something geeky in your room. That would
make me happy. I know you’ve never had your own room before, but you deserve
it.” 
Castiel stood back and listened to Dean talk to Sam as if his brother was
awake. It hurt to watch, because Cas knew that Dean was talking out of
nervousness and fear that Sam could slip away from him at any time. He was
fairly certain Sam was going to pull through just fine. He just thought Sam
needed rest and time to heel from the physical injuries. Castiel excused
himself to go to Gabriel’s room to pack Sam’s things. At least that way, Cas
reasoned he could give Sam and Dean some privacy.
++
Castiel used one of his spare suitcases to pack Sam’s clothes. He could feel
Gabriel’s eyes on him as he neatly tucked the clothes away. He wanted it to be
neat because he didn’t want Sam to think that his items didn’t matter. Castiel
didn’t want Sam to ever feel less than human ever again. Partway through
Castiel heard Gabriel speak, “I’m sorry.”
Castiel looked up from what he was doing and sighed. He said with some heat,
“I’m not the one you should be apologizing too. You do realize that Sam could
have died. Sam has been nothing but kind to you. He did everything you asked of
him and yet you still treated him like garbage.” Castiel put a pair of socks in
the case with some force. Through gritted teeth he asked, “Why did you brand
him?”
Gabriel frowned and said quietly, “I ordered the brand some time ago. I’ve
intended on doing it for a while. I wanted something on him to mark him as mine
forever. I wanted to make sure he would never forget me. I knew Sam wasn’t on
broad with the idea, not really. He would agree but it was out of fear.”
Sheepishly Gabriel admitted, “Tonight was my last chance and I didn’t want to
pass it up. It was wrong.”
Castiel rolled his eyes and said bluntly, “Understatement.” He started packing
Sam’s clothes again.
After a few minutes Gabriel got up and walked over to what was Sam’s
nightstand. He opened the drawer and pulled out Sam’s postcards. He took Sam’s
family picture off the nightstand and put it on top of the postcards. He handed
it to Castiel. “Here, these belong to Sam.” Castiel took the cards and the
photo and put them in a side pocket on the luggage.
Gabriel watched as Castiel finished packing. He glanced around the room to see
if he saw anything of Sam’s and he didn’t. Aside from Sam’s blood on the
carpet, Sam was no longer here. As Castiel pulled the suitcase off the bed,
Gabriel asked, “Do you think he will want to talk to me?”
Castiel stared his brother in the eye for a moment. Then he said coldly, “I
seriously hope not, but I will pass along your apologies for mutilating and
almost killing him. I am sure Sam and his family will understand that you were
onlyacting like a jealous and possessive sadist.” With that Castiel walked out
the room.
++
When Castiel returned to his room, Sam’s eyes were open and Sam was staring
blankly at Dean. It looked like Dean had gotten most of the blood and whatever
else was on Sam’s cleaned up. He sat the suitcase down by Dean’s duffel. He
knew Dean would probably want to leave as soon as Sam was well enough.
Castiel stood back and watched as Dean worked a small screwdriver and undid the
screw holding Sam’s collar on. It required a special screwdriver. Castiel
wasn’t sure where Dean found the screwdriver and he wasn’t about to ask. He
watched in silence as the collar was removed from Sam’s neck. He watched as Sam
reached up a shaky hand to touch his bare neck. Castiel knew Sam hadn’t been
without a collar in seven years. It had only been taken off briefly once that
he was aware of and that was when Gabriel put a bigger collar on Sam because of
his growth spurt.
Dean watched as Sam felt his bare neck. He realized that must feel strange for
Sam. The kid had worn that collar for a third of his life. It probably felt
like a part of him was missing. Dean lightly brushed Sam’s hair out of his
face. He watched as Sam dropped his hand back down to the bed and closed his
eyes. It wasn’t long before Sam had drifted off to sleep.
Once Sam was sleeping soundly, Dean looked up at Castiel and spoke quietly as
not to wake Sam. “Thank you.”
Castiel frowned and whispered back, “Dean, you don’t need to thank me. If
anything, I failed you. I did not protect your brother and for that I am
sorry.”
Dean nodded but didn’t say anything. He got up from his chair and went over to
his duffel. He pulled out Sam’s box of postcards. He opened it carefully. He
was fully aware that he would have to give it back to Sam soon. He gave a
curious look to the postcard on top. He hadn’t seen that one before. It had
candy on it and it looked newer.
Dean found that odd. He pulled the card out and flipped it over.
“Dean,
I am going to ask to be free but if he kills me I wanted you and Dad to know
that I love you and I miss you. I didn’t want to tell you in person in case he
heard. Please don’t blame yourselves for this. It’s my fault I wasn’t strong
enough.
Sammy”  
***** Chapter 32 *****
Sam wasn’t really sure what happened or what he did wrong. Gabriel had hurt him
before, but never like this. He knew he was in Dean and Castiel’s room. He knew
Dean took his collar off and Castiel played doctor. Sam just didn’t know why.
He knew he was twenty-one now and he would be given a choice. However, Sam knew
he had not made a choice.
He got up slowly and felt pain shoot through his body. Sam looked down and
realized he was wearing clean clothes. He knew he didn’t put these on himself
so he knew Dean or Castiel did it when he was passed out. Sam shook his head
with how pathetic that made him. He got up off the bed after he noticed Dean
and Castiel were both absent from the room.
Sam slowly made his way to the bathroom. He glanced at himself in the mirror
and thought he looked like Hell, not that it was unusual for him. Sam noticed a
bandage on the side of neck. He didn’t remember Gabriel biting him there and it
felt different than the other bite marks littering his body. Sam took a step
toward the mirror then he carefully peeled off the bandage.
He saw the brand on the side of neck. Sam felt himself get sick and he barely
made it to the toilet before throwing up. He was still heaving over the toilet
when Dean walked in. Sam felt his brother rubbing circles lightly on his back.
Eventually, Sam moved away from the toilet and sat down on the floor. He was
fighting back tears.
He did not want to be so weak, but now there was never going to be a chance
that he would get away from Gabriel. Sam was literally branded as his. He just
wanted to die. He was so close to being free and now that was ripped away from
him. Sam had no idea why Dean was here trying to comfort him. He didn’t know
where Gabriel was or what Gabriel would do to him next.
The tears of defeat spilled down Sam’s face. He started sobbing and regretting
ever making that deal with Gabriel all those years ago. He should have just
died that day either by the guards or in Gabriel’s bathtub. It didn’t really
matter to Sam. He just wanted death. Sam realized absently that he was soaking
Dean’s shirt with tears and probably snot. But he wanted this comfort as long
as he could get it. Sam had no idea what Gabriel had in store for him next and
he honestly didn’t want to know.
When Sam’s sobbing started to die down. He heard Castiel’s gentle voice, “You
should drink some juice to get your sugar levels up.” With a shaky hand Sam
took the juice from Castiel. He knew that Castiel wasn’t his master but he knew
he should listen to Castiel in his master’s absence. However, what Castiel said
next surprised Sam. “I’ve never asked you but what do you prefer to go by? I
know that Dean calls you Sammy. Your paperwork said Samuel Winchester and
Gabriel always called you Sam.”
Sam blinked a couple times and was honestly confused. Did Castiel just say
Samuel Winchester? Sam knew he hadn’t been called that in years. He didn’t have
a last name. Sam figured this must be some sort of sick trick. After last
night, Sam thought anything was possible. Softly and carefully Sam said, “My
name is whatever Master pleases, Sir.”
Castiel realized then that Sam did not know he was free. He left the room for a
moment and took out the paperwork. He walked back to where Sam was sitting on
the bathroom floor and handed it to him.
Sam took the papers Castiel handed to him and he started to read them
carefully. He was free. Gabriel freed him. His heart sank when he saw the
reason though. It wasn’t just that his time was up. It was that he was unfit.
Once again in Sam’s life, he wasn’t good enough. He had given Gabriel
everything he had to offer. He let Gabriel be his first and he let Gabriel do
anything to him, but he still wasn’t good enough. Not being good enough was the
story of Sam’s life, he thought.
Sam handed the paperwork back to Castiel and started crying again. He had
nowhere to go. He was damaged and branded as a slave. No one would ever respect
him. Sam knew he would spend the rest of his life as an outcast and he doubted
his family would want him now. He whispered out, “He branded me. Everyone will
know. I’ll always be a freak. I have nowhere to go.”
Dean glanced up at Castiel then back to Sam. He chose his words very carefully.
“Sammy, you’re not a freak. You have a place to go. You can live with me and
you can finish school or whatever you want to do. We can go to the doctor and
see what we can do to cover up that brand.”
++
Dean and Sam left Gabriel’s house a short time later. Castiel stayed behind
because Dean noticed that Sam seemed wary of Castiel. They didn’t see Gabriel
before they left, which Dean counted as a plus. He had no idea how Sam would
react to Gabriel and he wanted to avoid that situation if at all possible. Sam
for his part was silent aside from declaring himself a freak. Sam hadn’t said a
word.
About halfway to his apartment, Dean realized that they hadn’t eaten anything
and Sam should probably get something to eat. He pulled off in a small town and
pulled into the lot of an old diner. Dean gracefully got out of his baby only
to find Sam was still sitting in the passenger seat. He leaned down and poked
his head through the open door. He asked Sam casually, “Are you coming in?”
Sam glanced up at Dean then he eyed the diner. He remembered the last time he
got to out and eat in public. It was three years ago on his eighteenth
birthday. Gabriel was still being nice to him most of the time then. Sam played
with his hands for a few moments and said into his lap quietly, “I haven’t been
allowed out like this in a long time.”
Dean slipped back in the drivers’ seat of his car. He knew this conversation
was going to take some time. Carefully Dean asked, “When was the last time you
went out to eat?” He didn’t know the correct way to approach this subject. He
wondered if he should get Sam professional help. Dean had no idea. He didn’t
even know if there were therapists that specialized in former slaves.
Sam frowned and said quietly, “Master only took me out one time and that was
for my eighteenth birthday. I nearly got punished when someone in the
Resistance spoke to me.” He paused and stared at his hands for a few moments.
He was nervous around Dean. He knew Dean didn’t own him or anything like that,
but he didn’t want to make Dean angry. Sam knew he was dependent on Dean.
Nervously Sam added, “I don’t know the rules and I don’t want to get punished.”
Dean let out a slow breath and said carefully as he gripped his steering wheel.
“I guess my rules are the basic life rules. Don’t be an asshole and don’t take
your dick out in public.” He grinned and hoped Sam would see it as a joke, “Oh
and remember that I am the best brother ever.”
Sam gave a small smile and said, “You’re my only brother, Dean.”
Dean gave a light laugh and said softly, “How about we go in and try it? If you
get to uncomfortable, just tell me and we can get our food to-go.”
Sam nodded in agreement even though it hurt the brand on his neck. He cringed
internally at the reminder of what Gabriel had done to him. He watched Dean get
out the car first then Sam followed him into the diner.
It wasn’t busy and Dean asked for a booth in the corner. Sam sat with his back
facing everyone and it made him mildly uneasy. He knew why Dean took the seat
facing outward. Dean wanted to be able to keep an eye on everything in the
place. Their dad used to do the same thing.
After a couple moments, a young waitress stopped by. “What can I get you
gentlemen to drink?”
Dean looked up at her and said, “Coffee and water.” He looked over at Sam to
see that Sam was looking out the window at who knows what. It was then that
Dean realized aside from when Gabriel was in the hospital, Sam probably never
had a choice on what he ate or drank. Everything was decided for Sam. It made
Dean a little uneasy. He quickly thought back to what Sam drank. With Gabriel,
he had only seen Sam drink water and milk. Prior to that Sam would drink soda,
tea, or anything. Dean decided a little sugar wouldn’t hurt Sam so he said
nervously, “My brother will have a coke.” He plastered a smile on his face and
hoped the waitress would keep her mouth shut.
Luckily the waitress didn’t say anything. She smiled and sat down the menus.
Then she left to go get their drinks. The first thing Dean noticed after she
was gone is Sam didn’t make a move to open the menu. Dean made a point of
opening his menu as he quickly scanned it to find their cheeseburgers. He
gently said, “Sammy, do you know what you want to order?”
Sam turned and looked at Dean with confusion. He didn’t have money and he
didn’t know if Dean had money. If Dean was paying, Sam had no idea what he was
allowed to order or not. He was also wary of making the wrong choice because he
didn’t want to be a burden to Dean. Sam frowned and said, “I don’t have any
money.”
Dean smiled and said calmly, even though he wanted to reach across the table
and shake Sam. “I’m taking care of you, Sammy. Order whatever you like.” He
paused and pulled out his wallet. Dean took a couple twenties from his wallet
and sat them in front of Sam. “So you don’t have to worry about not having
money.”
Sam looked at the money for a moment. He thought it looked different from seven
years ago. The colors seemed a little more faded. Sam carefully picked up the
money and put it in his pocket. It felt nice to have his own money. He slowly
opened his menu and started to look at the options. There were a lot of
options. He thought about what he had been allowed to eat. Sam knew he had to
eat healthy. He was regulated to vegetables and lean meats or salads. Sometimes
if he was good, Master would let him have pasta or pizza. This diner didn’t
have that. Everything was fried or greasy.
The waitress returned with their drinks and Sam was staring blankly at the
menu. She sat down the drinks and said joyfully, “Do you guys know what you
want or do you need some more time?”
Dean grinned and asked, “Do you know what you want, Sammy?”
Sam frowned and stuttered out, “N..no.”
Dean frowned back and glanced at the waitress. “Give us a couple more minutes
please.” The waitress walked away and Dean turned his attention back to Sam.
“Are you okay?”
Sam ran his fingers over the edge of the menu and said distantly, “There is
nothing on this menu that Master would have allowed me to eat.”
Dean had the sudden urge to stab Gabriel but he reframed himself. Sam needed
him to be supportive and not to go off the reservation like Gabriel did. Slowly
Dean said, “Sam, you are your own Master now. Besides, are you telling me that
you haven’t had a burger and fries for seven years?” Sam glanced up at Dean and
Dean could see the shine in Sam’s eyes. It was tears. He was certain of it and
that gave Dean his answer.  Dean lowered his head and murmured, “Sorry.” He
cleared his throat and said, “Do you want my help?”
Sam thought for a moment and he realized he was being a burden. He also
realized that Dean had a point. He hadn’t had a burger and fries in seven
years. He wondered if that would be okay. He felt nervous about making a choice
so he accepted Dean’s help. “Yes, Dean.”
Dean grinned and scanned the menu for something, he thought Sam would like. He
also realized it had to be light since Sam got tortured last night and should
probably be in the hospital or in bed sleeping. He realized this diner probably
wasn’t the best option because it didn’t have anything fitting the bill.
Reluctantly Dean said, “How about a basic burger and fries? Something
traditional to celebrate your freedom?”
The waitress overheard Dean as she walked back over to the table. She chimed
in, “Now guys, surely the breakup wasn’t that bad it wasn’t like either one of
you were a slave. But anyways, do you know what you want order now?”
Dean saw the look of hurt on Sam’s face. He knew his brother’s pain was being
discredited and Sam would likely have to deal with insensitive people for a
long time. Quickly Dean said, “I’ll have a cheeseburger with extra onions and
fries. My brother will have a burger and fries. Thank you.”
After she left Sam started fiddling with his hands again. He was glad the
choices were over and he was actually glad in a way that the waitress couldn’t
tell. It did hurt that she didn’t realize how much he had gone through and
discounted being a slave as even a possibility. Sam did know that others had it
worse, much worse. He tried to keep that in mind.
Sam was pulled from his thoughts by Dean’s question. It was one his big brother
had never asked before, “So what was it like being a slave for seven years?”
Sam was quiet for a moment. He whispered out, “It was Hell. I don’t think
Master ever met any harm until about two years ago. Master was very upset about
the woman who touched and kissed me without Master’s consent. I lost all of my
privileges and I was punished. I know Master controlled everything prior to
that but it got worse.” Sam said a little closer to a normal volume level.
“Towards the end, I had to ask permission to leave or enter a room, go to the
bathroom, eat, drink, anything. It was always like a vacation when you and
Castiel came for a visit.”
Dean closed his eyes for a moment and said incredulously, “You had to ask
permission to go to the bathroom?”
Sam blushed and explained, “Yes, if permission was granted. Then Gabriel
advised me where and how, I could go. He liked to watch and make comments.”
Dean decided in that moment he hated sadistic princes more than witches. He
wanted to ask just exactly what kind of comments Gabriel was making about Sam
peeing or pooping, but he reframed himself. He also wondered what exactly
happened if Gabriel didn’t grant permission. Somehow, Dean doubted it was like
in school when the teacher made some poor kid wait an hour. Dean realized that
he probably did not want to know. He was glad that Sam was talking, even if at
times Sam was like a scared kitten. It was progress.
++
The rest of the trip to the diner was uneventful. Dean did realize about an
hour later when they had to pull along the side of the road for Sam to throw up
that Sam was not used to greasy food. He stopped and picked up Sam some water
and crackers in the hope it would settle his brother’s stomach. It did have
Dean worried though because most of what he ate was greasy or prepackaged food.
He made an internal note figure out how to cook some basic meals that Sammy
could handle.
By the time they reached Dean’s apartment, Sam was tired and he didn’t feel
good. He hurt all over and he just wanted to go to sleep. Dean carried both of
their bags up to the apartment for which Sam was grateful. When Sam stepped
inside of Dean’s apartment, the first thing he noticed is it was nice. It was a
lot nicer than any place they stayed in as kids.
The furniture looked used. Sam couldn’t picture Dean buying living room
furniture with large flowers on it. The furniture despite being unattractive
was clean. It smelled clean in Dean’s apartment. The kitchen looked clean and
Sam could see bread and cereal on the counter. There was even a dishwasher in
the kitchen which Sam found to be amazing for his family. Dean showed him the
bathroom, which was decorated in blacks and blues. Then Dean showed Sam, Dean’s
room which had classic rock posters covering the walls.
Finally Dean showed Sam the guest room. It was done in dark blues and had a
full size bed in the room. Sam could tell Dean didn’t go in here often. He
watched as Dean sat Sam’s bag down next to the bed and Dean nervously say, “I
hope you like it. This is your room. We can change it however you like. We will
probably need to get you a rug and something to cover the walls to cut down on
noise from the neighbors.”
Sam gave a small smile and said quietly, “Thank you, Dean. Am I allowed to
sleep on the bed?”
Dean stared blankly at Sam for a couple moments. He needed a moment to process
such a ridiculous question. It made him angry that Sam would even think for a
minute he wasn’t allowed such a thing. When Dean saw Sam’s face set into
something like resignation of not getting a bed, Dean snapped out of his daze
and said quickly, “Yes Sam, you’re always allowed to sleep on the bed or the
sofa. You can do anything you want. Just don’t start blaring music or the TV, I
don’t want to be an asshole like some of our neighbors.”
Sam smiled again and Dean hoped that it was a sincere smile and not just
something that was trained into his brother. Sam avoided eye contact and asked
quietly, “Is it okay if I go to sleep? I am not feeling well.”
Dean realized that he had pushed Sam today. He just wanted to get Sam away from
Gabriel. Dean nodded in agreement and said awkwardly, “Yeah, of course Sammy.
Cas packed your stuff. He said your postcards and picture are in a side pocket.
I put in a blank postcard from where Gabriel lived in your bag with them. I
noticed when we were growing up that you would write a new postcard whenever we
moved. I wasn’t sure if you still did that but I wanted to make sure you had
the option if you still did.”  Dean thought for sure he sounded like a girl and
he knew that his no chick flick moment rule was void for the foreseeable
future.
Sam looked at the bag and said, “Thank you.” He watched as Dean left the room
and closed the door most of the way. Sam wasn’t sure if he was allowed to close
the door or not. He figured he would ask about that later. Sam opened up his
suitcase and found his clothes. Everything was very neat inside the bag which
surprised Sam. He wasn’t expecting Castiel to care.
He changed into some sleep clothes. Then he pulled out the postcard Dean
bought. It was an aerial view of the city. Sam knew he hadn’t explored much of
that city but it was interesting to him to see that view of it. He flipped over
the card as he thought about what to write.
“I became free today after I was rejected by Master. I was accepted by my
brother and so far no one has been able to tell I was a slave. I will miss not
being branded.”
Sam slipped the postcard back into his suitcase with the others. Then he pulled
the covers back on the bed and laid down. He closed his eyes and tried to rest.
Sam hoped that tomorrow would be better. He still had no real idea of what he
was going to do now that he was branded as a slave. He didn’t feel like he
could follow his dreams anymore. He didn’t think he had a chance of fitting in.
***** Chapter 33 *****
Castiel hadn’t seen Dean in a week. He wanted to give Dean some space with Sam.
He knew that Sam was uncomfortable around him, which he couldn’t blame Sam for.
Cas did text and call Dean throughout the week to make sure everything was
going okay. He wasn’t surprised to hear that Dean thought he was in over his
head.
Cas did spend his time productively over the week. He secured Sam’s high school
and college transcripts. He got the name on the paperwork to reflect Samuel
Winchester as opposed to Sam – Slave of Gabriel Novak. Cas did find out that
Sam missed the final for one class. Sam would get a C without taking the final,
so he would still obtain his degree. However, since Castiel knew he had the
power that he rarely flexed. He arranged for Sam to be given an extension.
Castiel also filled out the forms for unconditional acceptance to whatever
graduate school Sam wanted to go to.
He was currently sitting in a small coffee shop near where Dean worked. Castiel
decided it was better to meet with Dean away from Sam. He wanted Sam to decide
if or when he wanted to see him. It didn’t take long for Dean to come strolling
in looking tired. Castiel gave Dean a smile as he watched Dean plop down across
from him.
Dean gave Castiel a weak smile and said tiredly, “You know, you can come over
Cas.”
Castiel looked away and then he turned back to Dean. “I don’t think that it is
wise for me to just drop by without Sam’s permission.”
Dean shrugged and tapped his fingers on the table. He stared at the ceiling for
a moment. He was mentally drained. He was more than grateful their dad was
there and grateful their dad has been sober. He slowly said, “Sammy is doing
okay, I guess. Dad is here and he is helping out as best he can. I don’t think
my dad is going to win any awards for the father of the year but at least he is
trying.” 
Castiel nodded and said hesitantly, “How are you doing?”
Dean rolled his eyes and said flatly, “I have too much on my plate to worry
about me right now.”
Castiel quirked his head at Dean and said calmly, “I find that hard to believe.
However, I will take your word on it. I did secure some documents for Sam that
he will probably want.”
Dean raised an eyebrow and asked curiously, “Oh?” He had no idea what
additional paperwork Sam could possibly need. Getting Sam to speak more than
four sentences an hour was something of a struggle.
Castiel opened up an envelope and pulled out a stack of paperwork. He calmly
showed Dean the first set of papers, “This is Sam’s transcript from high school
and his diploma to show completion. I had the name changed to Sam’s birth name
of Samuel Winchester.” He paused and pulled out another set of paperwork, “This
is Sam’s transcript for college. He is scheduled to graduate this week with a
Bachelors in Pre-Law. However, he missed the final in one of his classes
because of everything. He will get a C in that class without taking the final,
but Sam got an A in every other class. I arranged for Sam to be given a two-
week extension on the final. It doesn’t matter to me if he takes it or not. I
just wanted to make sure he had the choice.”
Dean looked at the paperwork and the classes Sam took. He realized that even
though Sam had zero life skills; his little brother was very book smart. He was
grateful Castiel had Sam’s name updated to his brother’s given name. It would
make things easier for Sam. Quietly Dean said, “Thanks, Cas.”
Castiel gave a small smile and went to the next set of paperwork, “Now, I don’t
know if Sam wants to or not. But I filled out unconditional acceptance forms
for Sam for any school in the country that offered law program. I don’t know if
Sam actually wants to go that route or not, but I wanted to give him the
option. With Sam’s grades, he wouldn’t have a problem getting in. But he missed
the deadline for admission to most grad schools. The forms I filled out for Sam
exempts him from that deadline.”
Dean stared at the unconditional acceptance forms for a moment. They were just
copies of the ones Castiel submitted. It was pretty clear to Dean that Castiel
spent some time on this. He appreciated it and he knew it would mean something
to Sam. Even though, Dean could not picture Sam being able to handle sitting in
a classroom anytime in the near future.
Those forms did make Dean curious about something though, “I had unconditional
acceptance from Gabriel because of a Wendigo that I killed at a state park or
something.”
Castiel frowned he remembered that. The monster had caused Gabriel to cut his
camping trip short and cost the lives of three slaves and one of Gabriel’s
close friends. Carefully Castiel said, “Oh yes, Gabriel used to go camping
every year at that park until the Wendigo attacked. It killed four people, one
of which was Gabriel’s friend. He was grateful when the hunter killed the beast
but he was still too uncomfortable to go back there. I think the letter was
just his way of saying thank you.”
Dean raised an eyebrow at that and huffed out a laugh, “Cas, I took credit for
the kill but it wasn’t me who killed it. Sammy killed it.” Bitterly Dean added,
“I think the fact that he tortured, raped, and mutilated my brother pretty much
voids any thank you for killing a monster.”
Cas fidgeted with his coffee cup for a moment. Then he said in agreement,
“You’re right, Dean. Sam never did anything to deserve the way he was treated.
My only hope is Sam can find a way to find happiness in life.”
Dean rolled his eyes and said calmly. He wanted to get through this book of
paperwork Castiel had for Sammy so he could explain it to his brother. “What
else do you have?”
Castiel pulled out the last couple pages of paperwork. It was nothing official,
“I gathered some information for Sam. There is a support group nearby for
former slaves. They offer therapy and mental health services if Sam needs it
and is willing. I also found a plastic surgeon that specializes in burns. I
contacted him and he said that he may not be able to remove the brand
completely without doing some type of surgery. I am not sure if Sam wanted to
do that or not. However, there are less invasive options that will make it less
visible. Regardless, this surgeon is expensive and I set up the billing to go
to me. Sam doesn’t have to worry about the cost on this. The surgeon can also
take a look at Sam’s other scars if Sam wants.”
Dean bit down on his lip and asked carefully, “Why are you doing this for
Sammy?”
Castiel sighed and said quietly, “I do it for any former slave in need. I do it
anonymously, so they don’t know it came from a Novak. I am a major donor for
the support group and the plastic surgeon agreed to do everything at cost,
which is still high. I picked up the rest of the tab. Honestly, Sam is the most
scarred of any slave I have seen. He is also the most mentally damaged.” He
paused and added, “I can’t do a lot, Dean. But I can do this. I know it will
never make up for what my brother did to Sam and countless others, but it gives
them a shot.”
Dean thought about that for a moment. He had no idea Cas did any of that stuff
and he was honestly grateful Cas took care of all of Sammy’s transcripts. Dean
knew it was going to be a pain getting all of that sorted out and Cas did it
for them. Dean gave Cas a small smile and said, “Thanks, Cas. Really,
everything you did means a lot. I am sure Sammy will appreciate it.” He paused
and asked curiously, “Has Gabriel said anything about Sammy?”
Castiel frowned and said carefully, “Yes, he has. Gabe wanted to know how Sam
was doing and he wanted me to ask Sam if he could call or stop by sometime. I
told him that Sam is recovering every day and right now, Sam doesn’t need him
in his life.” Cas quickly added, “But if Sam feels differently, I can have Gabe
get in contact with him.”
Dean shook his head no and said firmly, “No, I don’t want Gabriel anywhere near
Sammy. I can’t even get Sammy to call Gabriel by name. He still calls him
Master.”
++
Dean arrived home a little after six. He could smell dinner cooking. He knew
Sam was the one cooking. Their dad was setting the table. On the surface, it
looked very typical. Dean knew there was much more than that. Sam was nervous
around them and he could tell Sam was trying to figure out how he fit into the
family.
It took effort for Dean to be calm and supportive when deep down he was angry.
He wanted Sam to get angry. He wanted Sam to want something but as it turned
out Sam really didn’t want anything that Dean didn’t already take for granted.
Sam wanted a home, food, and his family. It was easy for Dean to provide that;
it just didn’t seem like enough somehow.
Sam was looking better. The bruises and hickeys scattering Sam’s body had
healed in a week’s time. The bite marks seemed to be healing nicely and Dean
knew either him or his dad would have to take the stitches out soon. The brand
was prominent on Sam’s neck, but Sam didn’t bother covering it up unless they
were leaving the apartment. That was probably for the best so it could heal
properly.
Sam did cut his hair. Well, Dean caught Sam cutting his hair off and Dean
stepped in to trim it so Sam wouldn’t do a hack job on it. His hair was still
long but it was like what Sam had in school. He had bangs again and his hair
was off of his neck. After the haircut, Sam inspected it in the mirror. It was
one of the few times over the past week that Dean saw Sam smile. Dean had no
idea what the significance of the haircut was, but if he had to guess. It was
Sam’s way of rebelling against Gabriel. However, the practical side of Dean’s
brain said that Sam shouldn’t have his hair brushing up against the brand all
day while it is healing.
Sam still wasn’t talking much about his time with Gabriel and Dean couldn’t
really blame him. Dean had no idea how to even approach that subject. He had
never been tortured or raped. He had never experienced the things Sam
experienced. He never felt that pain or hopelessness. It did make Dean admire
Sam to some degree because Sam made it out. Sam got through it when the odds
were stacked against him. Dean knew that Sam was stronger than he ever gave
himself credit for. He was confident Sam would recover from this, but if the
roles were reversed he couldn’t be so sure.
There was a lot going on that Dean didn’t know how to handle. There were times
when Sam would be busy doing something or just watching TV, then all of sudden
Sam would glaze over and start to shake. Dean wasn’t sure what that was about,
but his dad told him it was probably a flashback and not to touch Sam when it
happened. All Dean could do is sit next to Sam a few inches away and talk
gently about nothing while he waited for it to pass. Eventually, Sam would
blink rapidly at him as if he was confused and Sam would snap out of it.
Sometimes, he ended up with a crying Sam in his arms. Sometimes, he watched as
Sam retreated to his room for privacy. Either way, Dean felt completely
helpless.
The nightmares started a couple days ago. The first time it happened Dean and
his dad woke Sam up quickly. The second time Dean stood in the doorway and
listened for a moment. Sam talked in his sleep. Dean could hear Sam’s whimpers
and begging. Sam’s words were always short, “I’m sorry.” “Please don’t.” “No.”
“It hurts.” “Please stop.” It was enough to make Dean want to throw up. He
didn’t know exactly why his brother was begging for in his sleep. But he
guessed it was a nightmare about something that happened and if Dean had to
guess he would guess it was sexual in nature.
Dean was pulled from his internal thoughts with the clatter of dishes. He
looked up to see Sam carefully plating something for dinner. He had no idea
what it was but it looked healthy. Dean hated rabbit food, which this most
certainly qualified as even though it wasn’t a salad. However, he was not about
to say a word about that to Sam. He had no idea how Sam would react to
criticism or playful jabs right now. He opted to avoid that situation because
Sam had enough going on.
He sat down at the table a short time later with Sam and his dad. They ate in
relative silence. Dean broke the silence with a tentative, “So Sammy, I saw Cas
today over lunch.” He immediately regretted bringing up Cas because Sam dropped
his fork and started shaking. Quickly Dean said, “Hey, it’s okay. He’s not
going to hurt you. He gave me copies of your transcripts from high school and
college. Along with some information to help you get settled into life as a
free man. That’s all.” Dean decided to hold off on the therapy and plastic
surgery part of his conversation with Cas.
Sam looked up at Dean with pleading eyes. He did not want to get sent back to
Gabriel. His master hated him and Sam accepted that as a fact, but he didn’t
want to face whatever Gabriel might want to do to him next. What Sam couldn’t
understand is why Castiel would give Dean his transcripts. It’s not like it
mattered anyways, it would take years to get his records changed from being a
slave to a free person with a name. Sam looked down and said quietly, “Oh, it
will probably be easier for me to redo everything then try to get it to say my
name.”
Dean rolled his eyes and said calmly, “Cas already got the paperwork changed
for you. He put it under Samuel Winchester because it was your birth name. He
also made sure you can get into any grad school you want if you want to go.”
Dean put up his hand to stop any protests his little brother might have. “Cas
doesn’t want anything in return. He knew you put work into it so he wanted to
make sure you got what you worked for.” Dean watched Sam pick at his food and
nod in understanding. Satisfied Dean asked, “So what did the two of you do all
day?”
Sam gave an uncomfortable smile and said nervously, “Dad and I went to the
laundromat and I ironed your clothes for work. I know I didn’t have permission
to go into your room to put your clothes away but Dad insisted it was okay.”
Sam looked down and away. Quietly he said, “If it wasn’t, I’m sorry.”
Dean shook his head and said calmly, “It’s fine, Sam. Thank you for doing my
laundry and ironing. I really appreciate it.”
++
After dinner and watching some evening TV with his brother and Dad, Dean
retreated into his bedroom. It was a long day. He pulled out a binder that he
kept tucked away under his bed. It had copies of all of Sam’s postcards. He had
given the box back to Sam earlier in the week.
Dean made copies so he could still look at them and remember his brother. He
did it so he wouldn’t give up hope that his brother would be okay in the end.
He did make copies of the postcards Sam wrote with Gabriel, however, Dean had
not read most of them. The one with bloody fingerprints on it was the one that
hurt Dean the most. Dean knew the blood belonged to Sam.
Still, Dean flipped through the binder to a random page. It was a postcard with
candy on it, which told Dean it was from when Sam was with Gabriel. He cringed
internally but still looked down on the page to see what Sammy wrote.
“Gabriel said I can open the curtains and look out the window in the study when
I’m not busy. I missed being able to see outside.”
Dean felt bad because this postcard showed how isolated Sam was. He didn’t know
what to make of how looking out a window was important enough to Sam for him to
write it down on a postcard. Dean wondered how long Sam went without going
outside or even looking outside. He wondered what it would be like to miss the
blue sky or the stars in the sky at night. Dean had never experienced missing
that because he could see that anytime he wanted. Dean had no idea how to make
Sam better. 
***** Chapter 34 *****
Sam isn’t sure what to make of life with his dad and Dean. It is different than
before. They aren’t on the road and Dean has a real job. They have a small
apartment which feels crowded with the three of them. He noticed that Dean and
his dad were giving him a lot more freedom than he had experienced in years.
He went out every day somewhere with his dad. Sometimes, he thought John was
just making up places to go so they would get out of the apartment. Sam noticed
that his dad always struck up a conversation with someone and he always tried
to include Sam in the conversation. Sam never said anything though because he
wasn’t sure what he was allowed to say. He knew that with Gabriel saying the
wrong thing could result in punishment.
Sam had been free for a few months at this point. He had decided to take a year
off before going to grad school. He wasn’t even sure he wanted to go to law
school anymore. In some ways, it just sounded like what Gabriel wanted for him
and he just wanted to try to be his own person. Even though, he wasn’t sure how
to do that without getting hurt or even what that really meant. Sam knew he
just needed sometime to clear his head or ‘heal’ as Dean called it.
He had talked to the plastic surgeon and asked for the less invasive option on
taking care of the brand. He knew it wouldn’t remove it, but it would reduce
the appearance of the brand. Sam was grateful his dad always acted like the
brand wasn’t a big deal. The reason why Sam didn’t want it removed completely
was because that involved literally cutting the thing off of his neck after
they stretched his skin out. It sounded painful and he wasn’t too keen on the
idea of someone having a knife to his neck while he was unconscious.
Sam decided not to do anything with the other scars. He remembered when the
plastic surgeon saw them. The surgeon murmured, “My God.” But didn’t say
anything else. Sam wondered if it was really that bad. He had seen other slaves
get tortured. He had seen Lucifer set a slave on fire, while the slave was
alive. He had seen Lilith skin Gummy Bear’s girlfriend alive in front of him.
He didn’t like to think about Gummy Bear’s fate that much. Sam was there at
Gabriel’s or Lucifer’s feet throughout the ordeal. Michal, Lucifer, and Gabriel
made Gummy Bear watch every member of his family get murdered slowly and
painfully. The memory of Gabriel killing haunted Sam to this day. Gabriel
killed Gummy Bear’s grandmother and Gummy Bear. Sam realized when he watched
Gabriel kill that Gabriel was just as sadistic if not more so than his older
brothers. He willed himself not to think of the details.
When Sam closed his eyes to try to shake away the thoughts. He could feel
Lucifer’s hands on him and Lucifer talking lowly in his ear as Gabriel tortured
and killed, “Now Sam, keep your eyes on your Master. Remember, he could do this
to you and I will enjoy it if he did.” Sam shivered and opened his eyes.
He wandered to the bathroom and splashed some cold water over his face to try
to make the memories go away while he repeated to himself that he got out and
Gabriel couldn’t hurt him anymore. Sam knew he would never speak out against
the Novak family. He wasn’t stupid and he would prefer not to get every member
of his family killed along with himself.
Sam gripped the side of the counter as he tried to pull himself together. He
heard his father’s strong but comforting voice, “You alright, Sammy?”
Sam shook his head and said with a little strain in his voice, “I don’t want to
remember.”
John stared at Sam for a moment. He couldn’t blame his son for not wanting to
remember. He knew whatever memory Sam was thinking about wasn’t pleasant. Sam
rarely talked about anything pleasant with Gabriel and when Sam did it just
caused John’s heart to ache a little more. He wasn’t sure how to process
getting to wear shoes as being a reward.
John missed being able to talk to Sam or see Sam when he was a slave. Gabriel
controlled his contact with Sam and Gabriel didn’t let him talk to Sam for
years. He knew part of that was his fault. He thought Sam was better off dead.
It wasn’t because he wanted Sammy to die. It was because he thought Sam was
going to die before he turned 21 anyways and he didn’t want Sammy to suffer. He
knew that Sammy did suffer though and he knew there was nothing he could do
about it.
It made him want to drink, but he had made a promise to Dean to stay sober.
John knew logically that made sense. There was no telling how Sam would react
to him or Dean drunk. Most likely, John guessed Sam would panic or maybe find
some place to hide. It would cause Sam to take a step back in the progress his
son has made and Sam didn’t need any avoidable setbacks.
Calmly John asked, “Do you want to talk about it, Sammy?”
Sam lowered his head and shook his head no. He said with reservation, “You
can’t help me.” Sam looked up at his dad’s reflection in the mirror behind him.
He could see his dad was not being judgmental and looked honestly concerned. He
wondered if it was really okay to trust his dad. If it was okay to tell his dad
the things that haunted him.
Carefully John said, “Sammy, getting it off your chest might help you work
through it. I can’t change the past and I can’t ever make up for what Gabriel
did to you. But Sammy, I’m your father. You and Dean are all I got. I will love
you no matter what. There is nothing you could tell me that would make me love
you any less.”
Sam blinked away tears and said brokenly, “You can’t imagine, Dad. The things I
saw. The things I experienced. I wish it never happened to me.”
John completely agreed. He wished it never happened to Sammy either. He didn’t
wish this on either of his boys. Although, he knew deep down Sam probably
handled it better than Dean would have. He knew he would never tell either of
his boys that. He didn’t want to make Sam feel like he deserved what happened
and he didn’t want Dean to be personally offended. John spoke again in the same
careful tone, “I know, Sammy. I wish for the same thing but you’re home now.
Dean and I are both here for you. I think talking about it as your comfortable
will help you.”
Sam moved away from the sink and leaned up against the counter. He looked at
his dad. Sam grimaced and said quietly, “I can’t get it out of my head. Master
and his brothers killed an entire family in front of me. It was the family of
the slave with tracker that led the Resistance to Master. The things they did
was unimaginable. Master only killed two people, the slave and the grandmother.
Michael, Lucifer, Lilith, and Eve killed a lot more. They killed everyone right
down to fifth cousins. It didn’t matter how old they were or if they were
innocent. They all died.”
John leaned up the doorframe and asked in a nonjudgmental tone. “What about
Castiel?” He honestly wanted to know what role his older son’s boyfriend had in
that massacre.
Sam shook his head and said weakly, “Castiel wasn’t there. From what I heard
Lucifer and Michael say, Castiel disagreed with killing the extended family and
the slave’s siblings. I guess Cas thought that the slave and his parents should
be killed but no one else. Those three people were the only ones actually
involved in the crime.” Sam paused and added, “I wish Castiel was there. Master
always gave Castiel my leash at family functions when he got called away.
Castiel was always kind to me. He would let me stand and give me water. He
would let me look away, close my eyes, or escape inside myself. Anyways,
Lucifer had my leash when Master executed those people. He wasn’t kind like
Castiel.”
John felt his mouth go dry. He knew on the grand scheme of things what Sam had
just told him was pretty mellow. It was just the idea of Sam being led around
on a leash like some animal that had him at a loss. John had no idea how being
on a leash with Dean’s boyfriend was better. His son was still on a leash. He
knew that Castiel was not the focus of Sam’s memory. It was what either
Lucifer, Gabriel or both of them did.
Carefully John said, “I’m sorry, Sammy. I didn’t know they treated you like an
animal. Can I ask what happened?”
Sam huffed out a bitter laugh and said, “Dad, animals had more rights than I
did. I was beneath a dog at the pound on its way to be put down. They made sure
I knew that too. Castiel was the only one that said I was a person. He wanted
me to be his slave instead of Master’s slave. I wasn’t sure if he would hit me
and I think I thought he would want to have sex with me like Master did. I
didn’t want to mess things up for Dean or end up in a worse situation, so I
begged to stay with Master.”
Sam fidgeted with his hands for a moment then he started to talk distantly.
“Whenever, you or Dean mention group therapy where former slaves talk about
their experiences. I feel like I would be betraying Master. I’ve seen what
happens to people who betray him. They die.” He paused and let out a slow
breath while he tried to form words for what he had to say. “When Master killed
the old lady and Gummy Bear, Lucifer had my leash. He wouldn’t let me look
away. He kept telling me that Master could do this to me and I believed him.
“Master killed the old lady first in front of Gummy Bear. He put a line in the
veins on her arms so she would bleed out. But he didn’t leave her be. Master
got a tattoo gun. He stripped her naked. Then he started tattooing words on her
body, on her face, everywhere. Master’s writing was shaky since I don’t think
he’d tattooed anyone before. It took her a couple hours to die. Once she was
dead, Master made Gummy Bear read everything that he wrote on her. He had to
say, ‘My grandma was’ and whatever Master wrote. When Gummy Bear was done,
Master cut out his tongue so he could never speak anything nice about her.
“Master was cruel to Gummy Bear. He used an iron to burn his skin, all of his
skin. Gummy Bear didn’t scream for that part. He didn’t scream or cry until
Master pulled his teeth out. Master injected some blue liquid into various
parts of Gummy Bear’s body. He started with the slave’s dick and balls. He
injected it until that area was the size of a softball. Lucifer said it melted
Gummy Bear’s insides. It was a slow death and it looked painful. It took hours
and he was taunted the whole time.”
Sam stopped speaking and wiped away his tears. “I think it turned Master on to
torture someone like that. As Gummy Bear was dying, Master made me perform oral
sex on him. I never done that before and I didn’t want to.. And I didn’t think
I had the right to say no.” He shuddered and added, “He made me lick his shoes.
Then he made me lick Lucifer’s and Michael’s shoes.  There.. There was blood
and other fluids on their shoes. He made me tell them that I was meaningless
and worthless without Master. I cried as I said it and when Master made me do
those things. They laughed at me and mocked me.” Sam looked up at his dad with
tears rolling down his face. He brokenly asked, “Why did that happen to me,
Dad?”
For that John did not have an answer. There was absolutely no justification for
what Sam wet through. There was no real justification for anything that
happened that day. John was at a loss for words so he did the only thing he
could. He pulled his younger son in for a hug. He held Sam tight and whispered,
“You’re important and no one is ever going to treat you like that again. I love
you, Sammy.”
++
John was desperate to figure out something to do to brighten Sam’s day. His son
had been rather emotional all day. He thought getting out of the house could
help. However, he had to figure out where to go. He took some time and
convinced Sam to go to the support group for former slaves that evening. John
took the time to explain to Sam that he wouldn’t have to say anything, if he
didn’t want too. John wasn’t confident that it would cheer Sam up but he
thought it would help.
They arrived at an old church shortly before six for the meeting. John could
hear the distinctly female voices coming from a dining hall. He followed the
noise with Sam following close behind. They were met in the entry way to the
dining hall by a middle-aged woman with kind eyes. She was conservatively
dressed, “Hi, I’m Ellen. How can I help you?”
John stared at her for a moment then he spoke for Sam. He politely said, “We
are here for the support group for former slaves. My son, Sam, was a slave.” He
motioned towards Sam as he finished speaking.
Ellen eyed Sam for a moment and Sam ducted his head and stepped a little bit
behind his father. He felt like he was being picked apart. Sam heard the woman
skeptically say, “I’ve never seen a young man make it out alive. Who did you
belong too?”
Before Sam could answer he heard a familiar voice. He hadn’t heard this voice
in years. The voice was female and hesitant, “Sam! Is that really you?” Sam
glanced up saw Candy Apple or Meg. He looked back down as she approached. Her
voice perked up. “It is you! How are you?”
Nervously Sam said, “I am fine. Thank you, Meg.” He took a deep breath and
looked up into her eyes. There was still hurt buried in there that he could see
but she looked much more alive than the last time he saw her.
Meg smiled and turned to Ellen, “Sam was in the same house as me. I didn’t see
much of him. Gabriel kept him away from everyone.” She grinned back at Sam and
asked, “So how was Master Gabriel after I left? And who is this fine older man
with you?” Sam could hear the sarcasm by which she said master.
Sam looked over at his father quickly and stammered out. “This is my father,
John. I.. I am living with my brother and my dad.” Sam bit down on his lip and
said carefully, “Master changed.” He didn’t elaborate.
Meg just nodded because she understood. She smiled at John and said calmly,
“Sam took the pressure off the other slaves and put the focus on himself. I
imagine it was a little rough for him. Gabriel could be very cruel but he
always wrapped it in kindness to mess with your head.” She shrugged and said,
“He took one hell of a beating for me. You have a brave son.”
Sam sincerely doubted he was brave. If he had to pick a word to describe
himself, it would probably be coward. That is how Sam viewed himself because he
knew he submitted to Gabriel rather than being punished. He tried to tell
himself that if Gabriel just used physical pain he could have handled
punishment. But Gabriel didn’t use pain as much as other methods of control.
Sam sat next to his father during the meeting. He didn’t say much besides his
name. All of the women except Meg gave him an odd look. He knew it was unheard
of for a male slave to survive. All the former slaves in the support group were
general slaves either to the Novak household or city works. Sam was the only
one that was a personal slave to one of the Novaks.
He found that he couldn’t relate that much to what these women went through.
They weren’t treated like him. They were hit a couple times when correction was
needed. He was tied down to a bed for days when he needed correction. They
talked about how they would have never made it through if they didn’t have the
other slaves as companionship. Sam had no one to turn to except Gabriel.
Sam didn’t know if their experience was better or worse than his. He thought it
would be like comparing apples to oranges. Still it was nice to know, he wasn’t
the only one struggling with freedom. Sam was relieved to hear that he wasn’t
the only one who had trouble making choices or had trouble finding their place
back in their families.
Sam left the meeting with a packet of things to go through. He shifted through
it on the drive home. Inside there was a postcard, it had the wording on it.
“Every person is a person of value.”Sam thought about that and wondered what it
meant. He knew he wasn’t a real person when he was a slave. He was just an
object that Gabriel liked to play with. It made him wonder why they would write
something like that on a postcard to former slaves.
Still Sam flipped over the card and wrote.
“I met other former slaves tonight and it was nice because there are others who
are going through the same struggles as me. I missed Master tonight and I don’t
know if that is okay.”
Sam slipped the card back inside his packet so he could put it with the rest of
his postcards once they got home.
***** Chapter 35 *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Castiel was putting the finishing touches on cleaning his home. Today was an
important day for him. His grandparents, the Miltons, were coming over for the
first time. Castiel had missed their visit at Gabriel’s home about a year and a
half ago. He had no idea what went on but whatever happened it seemed to scare
his grandparents away.
Gabriel had spent the night in Castiel’s guest bedroom after he informed
Castiel that he was slumming it. Gabriel had not taken another slave after Sam
was released. Cas wasn’t sure how he felt about that. Part of him thought that
was a good thing considering how poorly Sam was treated and he did not wish
that to happen to another young man. The other part of him worried that Gabriel
might try to get Sam back.
Castiel had only seen Sam once since his release and that was brief. It was
when he stopped by Sam’s home to pick up Dean for a date. Sam did talk to him
but Castiel could hear the hesitation in Sam’s words. He knew Sam was waiting
for something bad to happen, so Cas kept his distance from Sam and spoke
politely to Sam without talking down to him. Sam did stutter out Castiel’s
name, but Castiel was happy that Sam didn’t feel the need to call him sir.
He really didn’t know that much about what was going on in Sam’s life. It
wasn’t that he didn’t want to know or didn’t care, he just didn’t want to pry.
Dean did talk about Sam but Castiel noticed that Dean kept the details about
Sam vague.
Castiel heard Gabriel’s tired voice behind him, “You know Cas, if you got a
slave you wouldn’t have to be fretting about housekeeping.” Castiel turned to
see Gabriel stretching and looking around.
Cas sighed and put down his duster. He attempted to sound calm when he said, “I
would rather do my own dusting than torture some poor kid into doing it for
me.” He wandered into the laundry room and put away his duster.
Castiel went into the kitchen to look over what they were having to eat. He
decided on grilling. It as summer and nice outside. Something grilled sounded
easy. He had never grilled that much before, Dean always took it over. He
frowned at that thought because of as much as he wanted to be self-reliant. He
relied on Dean and it did hurt a little bit that he couldn’t be around Dean as
much as he wanted to because of Sam.
It’s not something Castiel likes to think a lot about. He always felt childish
when he felt himself getting jealous because of all the time Dean spent with
his little brother. Cas knew that he was second in Dean’s life to Sam. He knew
he might even be third in Dean’s life behind Dean’s father. He doesn’t know and
he doesn’t ask. Castiel knew that Sam should be number one in Dean’s life. He
was happy that Dean was coming over today to meet his grandparents. He hoped it
wouldn’t be too awkward with Gabriel around.
++
Around an hour later, both Castiel and Gabriel look presentable. Castiel was
putting the chips on the table when he heard the doorbell ring. He quickly
wiped off his hands and went over to the door to answer it. He was greeted by
his grandparents. They looked hesitant. Castiel smiled and motioned for them to
come inside. Once they were safely inside his home, he closed the door and said
calmly, “Um welcome, this is my home. I was thinking we could just grill
something today to keep it easy.”
This grandmother smiled and said tentatively, “Of course Castiel, that sounds
wonderful. I must admit I was expecting your home to be extravagant.”
Castiel shrugged and looked around. He thought he had a nice home. It was just
the right size for him and he didn’t have to rely on anyone. He tilted his head
as he looked at her and said, “I don’t need much.”
Gabriel entered the room with a smile on his face. He reached out a hand and to
shake their hands. Happily, he said, “Mr. and Mrs. Milton, how are you?”
Richard Milton eyed Gabriel for a moment. He was very uneasy around Gabriel
after he saw what Gabriel did to the slaves under his care, in particular, the
boy Gabriel had. The boy, as Richard recalled, was frightened and undoubtedly
abused. He often wondered what happened to that boy and he hoped the boy was
okay. Politely Richard said, “We are well. How are things going for you?”
Gabriel winked at him and said joyfully, “Charming. I have a feeling today is
going to be wonderful. I am dealing with single life after Castiel made me sign
the release papers for Sam.”
Castiel cleared his throat and said firmly, “Gabriel, I don’t think we should
talk about that. It doesn’t make for a good conversation.” He put a nervous
smile on his face and hoped Gabriel would drop it. He really didn’t want to go
into how he thought Gabriel was being abusive toward Sam in front of his
grandparents.
Gabriel rolled his eyes and said with annoyance, “Fine, are we at least having
dessert?”
Castiel smiled and said with mild excitement, “Yes, Dean is bringing it. I
think he said he was bringing an apple pie, but I can’t be certain. Dean has a
tendency to change his mind.”
Amy Milton gave Castiel a curious look and asked, “Dean doesn’t live with you?”
Castiel smiled. He looked down at the floor briefly before answering, “No, he
doesn’t. Dean lives an apartment a couple miles from here with his little
brother and father. They just moved there not too long ago. It is a nice three
bedroom from what I understand. I’ve only been there once briefly.”
The doorbell rang again which interrupted Castiel from the chatter. He opened
the door to find Dean standing there holding a fabric shopping bag.  He leaned
in and gave Dean a kiss on the lips and whispered. “I owe you for this.”
Dean shook his head and handed the bag to Castiel. He was in a good mood
despite knowing Gabriel was there. “Sammy insisted on making the pie after I
bought a frozen one to bake. He said that it was just wrong to bring over a
premade pie. It’s cherry, I hope that is okay. Sammy made some homemade whipped
cream too. He said it has to be refrigerated otherwise it will start to
breakdown.”
Castiel graciously took the bag from Dean. He could feel the eyes of everyone
in the room on them. Castiel nervously said, “Please tell Sam, thank you for
me.”
Dean smirked but didn’t say anything. He was remembering what Sam said, “I hope
Castiel likes it. Cherry pie was the only dessert I made that he asked for
seconds on.”That was one of the few times where Sam’s experience as a slave was
actually a little useful to Dean. It was also nice to hear a memory from his
brother that wasn’t laced with manipulation or trauma.
Dean turned his attention to Castiel’s maternal grandparents. If you put them
together, Dean thought they looked a little like Gabriel. He mused that Castiel
must look more like his father’s side of the family. He thought about that for
a moment longer and realized that was probably true because Michael and Castiel
both have strong blue eyes.
He held out his hand and said confidently, “Hi, I’m Dean Winchester. It is nice
to meet both of you.”
++
Dean ended up taking over the grilling after he caught Castiel trying to put
the burgers on a cold grill. He shewed his boyfriend away and told him to go
socialize with his grandparents. Dean was happy manning the grill as he sipped
on a coffee. He was certain that his liver appreciated his no drinking rule. He
wanted to drink right now, but he had a strict no drinking rule around Sammy.
Dean knew Sam wasn’t here, but Sam would be there when he got home and Sammy
should not have to deal with the after effects of his drinking.
He was smiling down at his creation on the grill when Mrs. Milton came up to
him. He grinned at her and said happily, “I think they are coming along well.
It should only be a few more minutes.”
Mrs. Milton nodded and she fidgeted with the shelf next to the grill. Nervously
she said, “Thank you, Dean but that isn’t what I wanted to talk to you about.”
Dean raised an eyebrow and she continued, “Your brother was Gabriel’s slave if
I understood correctly. Is he.. is he free now?”
Dean frowned at sat down his coffee. Calmly he said, “Yes, he is. Sammy lives
with me and my dad moved in with us to help out.”
Mrs. Milton looked away for a moment and said sadly, “I met Sam at Gabriel’s
house. I felt terrible for the boy. I could see my Anna in him. He just seemed
so broken. He wouldn’t even talk so I never really got to know anything about
him. Gabriel wasn’t very nice to him from what I saw. .. I.. I just want to
know if he is doing alright.”
Dean sighed. He did not like going into Sam’s business with anyone. Still, this
was his boyfriend’s grandmother so he had to show kindness. Reluctantly Dean
said, “Sammy is walking and talking now. He has good days and bad days but he
has made a lot of progress in the past year. I can’t complain.” Dean pulled the
burgers off the grill and grinned at Mrs. Milton. “We will have to continue
this conversation over dinner.”
They sat the burgers down on the table. Then everyone sat down. Castiel sat
next to Dean and they fixed each other’s plates. Dean caught Castiel trying to
hide the onions from him but Dean found them anyways. It was fun and relaxed
until the conversations started up again.
This time it was Gabriel. His voice was strong and commanding. It sent a shiver
down Dean’s spine and he wondered briefly how many times Sam had the same
feeling. “Dean, tell me. How is Sam doing?”
Despite it potentially being a bad idea, Dean couldn’t stop the sarcastic
reply, “Great, now that you are no longer in his life.” Dean just wanted
everyone to stop focusing on Sam.
Gabriel groaned because he was honestly concerned about Sam. He knew Sam left
in pretty rough shape and he felt guilty about that. He had been working
through some things in his life and coming to terms with what he did to Sam.
Gabriel knew he started being cruel to Sam as Sam changed and became more
subservient. He knew he was the one that wanted the change and demanded the
change. It was the defiant spark inside of Sam that he loved the most and it
just disappeared over time. He wanted to have both sides of Sam but in the end,
he only ended up with one and that always caused his anger to flare with Sam.
Gabriel knew there was no excuse he could give for the way Sam was treated. It
was wrong and he knew he shouldn’t have done it. Even at the time, he knew he
should not be doing that. Gabriel spoke with ease, “I am sure… Humor me, Dean.
How is he doing?”
Dean rolled his eyes and sat down his food. He glared at Gabriel. His nerves
were shot from trying to be nice. He spoke harshly, “How is he doing? Are you
kidding me? You have no right to ask me anything about my brother. You raped,
tortured, and branded my baby brother like a piece of livestock. Oh, I almost
forgot all the times, you tortured and killed other people in front of him.”
Gabriel smirked at Dean then he smiled. Calmly he said, “Dean, I regret some of
the things I did to Sam. I honestly want to know how he is doing. I am sorry if
I hurt him.”
Dean took a calming breath and said, “Fine. I’ll tell you how he is doing. He
is going just fine. He has PTSD, but he is managing it. He goes to therapy
every week to work through the abuse that he suffered at your hands.  Sammy has
a job and he seems to be doing okay at. He still won’t leave our apartment by
himself, but last week we got him to go check the mail by himself. Sammy was
trembling in fear by the time he came back with it.
“Do you want to know who my brother was before you broke him? I’ll tell you who
he was. He was the most stubborn and passionate kid I ever met. He was strong
and he never just rolled over for anyone. Sammy was smart and he wanted that
house with a dog and a white picketed fence.”
Dean let out a humorless laugh, “Sammy doesn’t want to go to grad school now.
He wants to be invisible because he got branded as a slave. He feels like a
freak and I think most days he hates himself. He doesn’t want a dog anymore
because he was lower than a dog and he can’t even watch a dog get ordered
around without thinking about what it was like to be a slave. Sammy loved
himself and life before you.” Dean paused and added, “Oh, by the way, the
hardest question I have to answer every time he has a breakdown is ‘Why did
this happen to me?’ So tell me, Gabriel, why did that happen to Sammy?”
Gabriel was stunned into silence. He was surprised by what Dean had to say. He
never knew Sam viewed so little of himself and he felt bad that he made Sam
hate himself. He caused Sam to throw away his dreams. He took away Sam’s desire
to live. He did that. He broke Sam’s will. Gabriel wondered why he didn’t see
it before. He knew he had made mistakes. He liked the feeling of having power
over Sam and he never took the time to realize that his desire for power is
what caused Sam to change. He took away everything he liked about Sam.
Gabriel stared off into the distance as he thought about what he did to Sam. He
could see the pain, the desperation, the hope, everything on Sam’s face through
his memories. He gave Dean the only explanation he could, “Because I am a
monster, Dean. Sometimes, humans can be monsters too.”
++
Dean felt exhausted after coming home from the cookout at Castiel’s house. The
only bright side of the day was Gabriel admitting he did something wrong. Dean
knew that wouldn’t make up for anything, but maybe if Gabriel could be less of
an asshole in the future it would help. Deep down, Dean knew he didn’t care
what happened to Gabriel. He just knew Gabriel had power and he did not want
some other poor kid to suffer like Sam.
He missed who Sam was before all of this and he knew he could never have that
Sam back. Dean could still see glimpses of that old Sam in his brother, but it
was never often. Dean loved Sam just the same. However, he wished he knew how
to let Sam feel a passion for life again.
Dean pulled out his binder with copies of Sam’s postcards. He flipped to the
second page to read one of his favorites. It had a picture of a yellow brick
road on it. It came from a museum they visited about the Wizard of Oz. Dean
remembered Sam flirting with the tour guide dressed up as Dorothy. Sammy was
only seven at the time.
“If I could tap my heels three times to go home, I would be in the Impala. I
will miss getting to walk on a yellow road.”
Dean smiled at Sam’s words, because even though they never really had a home.
Sam found something that he could identify as home. Dean was glad he still had
his baby. He was glad that the Impala was the car John was using to teach Sammy
how to drive. 
Chapter End Notes
     FYI.. My period of unemployment is over and I am starting a new job
     on Monday. Therefore my updates will be a little slower. It will
     probably be every 2 to 3 days.
***** Chapter 36 *****
Sam was trying to figure out life in general. Being free turned out to be
extremely complicated. It was a much more difficult world to navigate than
being a slave. He noticed that Dean and his dad were pushing him to get out
more, make friends, and explore. The thing was, he didn’t know how to do that
and he was uncertain of making friends.
Growing up, he never really made friends because they moved around so much. His
only real friend was Dean and even that at times was strained because at the
end of the day he was still Dean’s annoying little brother. When he was a
slave, Sam didn’t think he had friends. He never considered Gabriel his friend.
Gabriel was his master and he thought he loved Gabriel, but he knew Gabriel
wasn’t his friend.
Pastor Jim and Castiel were both authority figures in Sam’s mind. He knew they
never did anything bad to him and Castiel went out of his way to avoid doing
anything to hurt him. Still, he didn’t view either of them as his friend.
Sam never really made friends with people at the church where he helped Pastor
Jim out when he was a slave. Most of them were kind to him, but he never
befriended them. Sam always kept them at something of a distance. Even Jessica,
who ruined his life, he kept at a distance. Sam knew that she wanted to be his
friend or something more than a friend. But back then, Sam knew he couldn’t be
whatever it was she wanted him to be and now Sam had no idea how to have a
healthy relationship.
Sam knew he rarely talked to other slaves when he was with Gabriel. He knew
most of them hated him for the simple fact they thought he was getting special
treatment. Sam knew he did get coddled by Gabriel but he also knew Gabriel had
complete control over him. Even early in their relationship, Gabriel exercised
control over him. He knew the control started off very parental in nature, then
it changed over time.
Now, he was actively hanging out with Meg, who was one of Gabriel’s household
slaves. Sam wasn’t really sure what he thought about her but Dean insisted it
was a good for him to try to befriend her. He wasn’t terribly social and he
didn’t really know how to do social interactions that much. So he invited her
over to his place once a month on Saturdays when he knew Dean or his dad would
be home. He was wary of spending time alone with her.
Sam always avoided personal conversation when he was with her. He never really
knew what to say about himself. She told him all sorts of things about her
life. It turned out she was a stripper that turned tricks on the side. Sam knew
it was a perfectly legal and regulated profession. It was just it felt like she
didn’t really value herself. Sam could understand that because he didn’t value
himself much either. He just didn’t want anyone to touch him.
Dean had gotten him a job at his work. Sam worked in the mailroom and delivered
mail to people’s offices. He also delivered files and copies, if needed. It was
inside a locked office building and he had a view of Dean’s office from where
he worked. Part of him knew it was pathetic to have to keep his brother in eye
shot, but he knew without it, he wouldn’t be able to work. Sam never spoke at
the office despite Dean’s best efforts to get him to say something.
He didn’t talk because he had always found it safer not to talk. When he was a
slave; it was safer not to talk so he wouldn’t anger Gabriel. Sam knew that
prior to the Jessica incident he could talk a little more openly with Gabriel
in private. After that Sam knew he couldn’t even talk to Gabriel. Prior to
being a slave, Sam pretty much kept his head down at school because there
wasn’t a point in talking to the other kids. If they found out his family was
hunters, it became the jocks goal to try to beat him up. So Sam gained a false
bravo much like Dean had in school and kept to himself.
Sam remembered how to talk to people and how to make polite conversation. It
was just he couldn’t bring himself to speak the words. Instead, he just smiled
and nodded his responses. Sam knew that a number of the people in the office
still tried to talk to him. Most of the talked to him like there wasn’t
anything wrong with him. Sam was fairly certain that Dean warned them that he
doesn’t talk much or at all.
Today was different for Sam because due to Dean’s pushing he was going to meet
Meg for coffee. Dean was going to be in the coffee shop with them, per Sam’s
request. But Dean informed Sam that he was going to sit at a different table so
they could have some privacy. He knew he could talk with Meg in private, but
talking to her in public terrified Sam. He had only just recently started
talking to Dean and his dad in public.
He was now sitting in a coffee shop with Meg sitting in front of him. He could
see Dean sitting a couple seats over at a different table. Sam knew Dean was
paying attention to what he was doing even though Dean was pretending to read a
newspaper.
Meg was always upbeat and Sam was never sure if that was just the way she was
or her way of hiding. He didn’t remember her being so cheerful with Gabriel.
She smiled at Sam and said playfully, “So Sam, how is life treating you?”
Sam looked up at her. It took him a moment to form the words to actually speak.
Even then he was quiet. He nearly stuttered when he said, “Good. Dean and my
dad are being very kind to me.”
Meg rolled her eyes and leaned forward towards Sam. She spoke seriously, “Sam,
you need to let loose a little bit.”
Sam wasn’t sure what she meant. He had plenty of downtimes. He played cards
with his dad and he watched HBO series with Dean. It was relaxing to him, so he
wasn’t sure what she meant by needing to let loose. Nervously Sam said, “I am
just.. just not used to talking like this.”
Meg raised her eyebrow and said seriously, “I know. Gabriel didn’t take too
kindly to you speaking and the guards were always dicks to you.” She paused and
asked curiously, “I don’t mean to sound harsh, but you’re pretty screwed up.
What did he do to you when you talked to other people?”
Sam scrunched up his brow and said tentatively, “Master did what he thought was
best for me. I.. I know he had my best interests in mind. But.. ah.. he would
usually put soap in my mouth for a period of time and after that, he would have
me repeat to him what I did wrong.”
Meg shrugged and said calmly, “A few minutes of soap and then repeating some
bullshit doesn’t sound too bad. Why did you believe that shit? You know, he was
just screwing with your head.”
Sam started to play with his hands, which is something he knew he did when he
was nervous. He bit down on his lip and said, “It wasn’t a few minutes. Master
had a minimum of four hours with the soap, but the longest was about a week.
Whenever I got upset about the punishment he would explain it to me. I knew
what rule I broke and I knew I deserved it.”
Meg had a contemplative look on her face then she shrugged and said, “Huh, I
always thought you had it better than us. I think I was wrong.” She paused and
carefully said, “I know, you might not believe me but you didn’t deserve that.
None of us deserved the way we were treated.”
Sam frowned and looked over at Dean. He wanted to go home now, but the words
were coming easier to him so he thought he should continue with this coffee
meeting. He thought it would please Dean. Quietly Sam said to Meg, “I wish I
could believe that, but I don’t.”
Meg stared at Sam for a moment. Then she grinned at him with excitement. “I
know what we need to do to get you to loosen up a little bit. We need to get
you laid. I’m guessing you won’t go the hooker route, especially with big
brother watching over your shoulder, so we just need to find you a nice man.”
She giggled and said, “You know, someone who will show you a good time and the
way it is supposed to feel. A real man.” She winked at Sam and waited for his
reply.
Sam blushed and ducted his head. He did not want to talk about this. His sex
life was a sensitive subject for him. It was something he talked in detail with
to his therapist, Ash. He was still struggling to come to terms with what he
did with Gabriel and understanding the subtle manipulation Gabriel used to get
him to agree to sex. He was still struggling greatly to understand that the
times Gabriel did things to him that he didn’t want that he was being raped.
Sam never viewed what Gabriel did as rape or molestation, even though that was
how his therapist, Dean, and his father defined it. He tried to explain that he
had to give his master everything but they seemed to disagree. They seemed to
think Gabriel took something that should have never been tampered with.
Then there was the issue with his sexual identity. He was never attracted to
Gabriel or any man. He liked women. He liked the way women looked and carried
themselves. He knew he would probably never have a girlfriend. But he was
attracted to women and according to his therapist that made what Gabriel did
worse. Sam could never wrap his mind around why that was.
Carefully Sam said, “I.. I don’t think so, Meg.” He gave her a small smile even
though it was forced. He nervously said, “I’ve never been attracted to men and
I don’t think I will ever be ready for any sort of relationship.”
Sam watched as Meg’s face paled and she said in disbelief, “Oh my god, he..
he.. I always thought that you must like men because Gabriel is an attractive
man. But oh my god, no wonder he didn’t want you talking to anyone. He didn’t
want you giving it up for a lady.” She paused and said in shock, “When the
guards raped me and you refuse to do it. Gabriel raped you back then wasn’t he?
My god Sam, you were so small back then. There was no way you could have
defended yourself against him.”
Sam shook his head no and struggled to find the right words. He hated going
into this much detail about his life. “It wasn’t like that. I didn’t touch you
like that because I thought it was wrong. I would rather die than do that to
another person. Master was pleased that I didn’t do anything to you. If I would
have, I would have been executed.” He paused and said tentatively, “Master
never did anything sexual with me until I was 16. I am very confused about the
consent involved in those activities and it is not something I like to talk
about.”
Meg leaned forward and put her hand on top of Sam’s. She looked at Sam with a
mixture of sympathy and pity. Her voice was kind when she spoke. “Sam, I am not
going to pry but Gabriel should have never touched you like that. It was wrong.
Even at 16, you were a child and you were isolated from everyone. Whatever
choice you thought you made, it wasn’t really yours. You were brainwashed.
Well, you still are kind of brainwashed. I’m sorry, Sam.”
Sam looked away toward Dean again. He was ready to wrap up this conversation.
Sam couldn’t understand why everyone thought Gabriel raped him. It wasn’t like
he ever said no to Gabriel except that one time. He wasn’t dumb enough to think
he had the right to say no. He quietly said, “I don’t feel that way. Thank you
though. I should be going.”   
++
Sam decided to take a nap once they got home from having coffee with Meg. That
was one of the nice things Sam found with living with his dad and Dean. If he
didn’t have to be at work, they didn’t care if he took a nap. He knew they
never objected to anything he wanted to do, but he never really pushed them
either. Sam remembered the first time, he asked permission to take a nap. He
wasn’t really tired. He was just testing his boundaries a little bit. Sam still
hadn’t managed to find out how far he could go without getting in trouble. He
gave up on testing boundaries when there was nothing else he wanted to do.
Sam laid down in his bed and he looked around the room for a few moments before
he drifted off to sleep.
It was dark and cramped. Sam wasn’t sure where he was. Then he felt the sharp
pain in his feet and he remembered where he was. Lucifer had shown up when
Gabriel wasn’t home. Lucifer had been angry about Sam wearing shoes. So Lucifer
beat his feet with a mixing spoon from the kitchen until his feet were bloody.
Then Lucifer tied his arms behind his back and tied his legs together.
Sam didn’t fight him because nothing good would come out of resisting Lucifer.
He let Lucifer shove him in the small space below the bottom shelf of the linen
closet. Sam couldn’t lay down, stand up, or even sit up straight. It was
completely dark and silent. He had no way of knowing what time it was or how
long it would be before Gabriel got home.
He wanted to go to give up. Sam cried silently in the darkness. He bit down on
his lip to muffle any sound his body made. Sam didn’t want to attract Lucifer’s
attention. Unfortunately, the door opened and Sam looked up. He wasn’t greeted
with Gabriel. It was Lucifer. Sam felt a new wave of tears take over him
because he wanted his master.
Lucifer grabbed him by the hair and threw him out of the linen closet. Sam hit
the wall across from the closet and groaned in pain. He didn’t move from where
Lucifer threw him. He heard Lucifer speak and he sounded smug and curious. “I
don’t know what my brother sees in you. You’re weak and pathetic. The guards
say you’ve never begged. I bet I know just how to get you to beg.”
Sam didn’t look up at Lucifer. He kept his eyes on the ground and prayed that
Gabriel would be home soon. His master could stop whatever it was Lucifer had
planned. Sam felt Lucifer kick him hard in the stomach and he curled over
slightly. That was enough for Lucifer to grab hold of his head and shove it to
the ground.
Sam’s nose collided with the ground and he felt it start to bleed. He thought
that was a nice distraction. Then he felt Lucifer pull him by the hips so his
ass was facing Lucifer. Then he felt Lucifer pull his pants down harshly. Sam
felt fear inside of him and he had a pretty good idea where this was going.
Gabriel had been the only person that touched him like that.
Sam closed his eyes and he let his tears flow because there was nothing else he
could do. He heard Lucifer move away from him but Sam didn’t move or try to
hide. Lucifer was back a moment later with a broom. The only reason Sam knew
Lucifer had a broom was that Lucifer made a point of hitting him with it.
Then Sam felt Lucifer shove part of the broom handle up his ass. With no prep
and no lubrication, it hurt and Sam screamed. He hadn’t had anal sex with
Gabriel in a few days. Gabriel was on an oral sex kick, so Sam knew he wasn’t
loose and did not have any leftover lube down there. Out of all the things he
never wanted to experience in his life, this was one of them. It hurt and it
was brutal the way Lucifer was moving the broom in and out of him.
Something broke inside of Sam at that moment.  Something he never even knew
could be broken. It felt almost like he was dying but really he was just giving
up. He couldn’t really focus on anything. He only felt the blinding pain. He
heard himself saying, “Please don’t.” and “No.”
Distantly he could hear Lucifer’s voice. Lucifer seemed happy and Sam thought
that must be a good thing. “Good bitch, beg for me.”
Sam heard himself whisper out, “Please stop.” But defeat had already set into
his bones. He wasn’t even trying now. Sam let his body go limp on the floor.
That made it easier. He had nothing to fight. All he had to do was submit. If
he submitted everything would be okay.
He repeated to himself that if he submitted everything would be okay for what
felt like hours. Lucifer didn’t stop fucking him with the broom handle. Sam
heard Gabriel’s voice and he felt relief even though Gabriel sounded angry,
“Lucifer, what the Hell are you doing?”
By some miracle, Sam felt the broom leave his ass. He felt something dribble
out of his hole and he hoped he didn’t poop on himself. It took him a moment to
realize it was probably blood. Sam listened to Lucifer’s smug reply, “Getting
him to beg like a good bitch. You should thank me.”
Gabriel spoke in a commanding tone, “Luci, leave us.” Sam could hear Lucifer
walking away and he felt safe. He flinched when Gabriel touched him. Gabriel’s
voice was soft now, “Hey Sam, you’re okay now. Come on let's get you back to
our room and I will call the doctor.”
Sam tried to move but ended up feeling like the world was spinning. He felt
Gabriel untie his hands and legs. Gabriel gingerly pulled up his pants up and
Sam felt Gabriel try to pull him to stand with Gabriel supporting some of his
weight. Sam cried out in agony when he tried to put weight on his feet. He felt
Gabriel try to take another step with him and Sam felt himself collapse on the
ground. He sobbed, “I’m sorry, Master. Please don’t. I’ll be good.”
“Sam.”
“Sammy.” Sam thought that was odd because Gabriel never called him Sammy. Only
Dean and his dad called him Sammy.
Dean stepped out to go check the mail while Sam napped and he got into a
conversation with the crazy cat lady at the end of the hall. He came back to
his apartment to hear Sam screaming and begging in his sleep. Dean threw the
mail down on the counter and he rushed into Sam’s bedroom. Dean grabbed hold of
both of Sam’s shoulders and firmly said, “Sam. Sammy.” He paused and waited,
“Come on man, wake up, Sammy.”
Sam woke up abruptly and he was startled at first because someone was touching
his shoulders. He relaxed when he realized it was Dean. He took a deep breath
and looked his brother in the eye and said, “Dean?”
Dean sighed in relief that Sam was with it. “Yeah Sammy, it’s me. You were
having a nightmare. Are you okay?”
Sam sat up and nodded. He fidgeted with his hands for a moment. “I’m good. I
was just having a dream about something Lucifer did.”
Dean swallowed hard. His gut told him that he did not want to know, but all the
help books he read about how to help trauma victims said that he had to be
willing to hear whatever it was Sam had to say. Against his better judgment,
Dean asked, “Do you want to talk about it? It sounded like Gabriel was hurting
you.”
Sam frowned and said with reservation. “Master wasn’t hurting me. Lucifer was
hurting me. Lucifer was trying to teach me how to beg.” Sam paused and
whispered out, “He did.”
Dean sat down next to Sam on his bed. He kept his distance because he wasn’t
sure how much physical contact Sam wanted right now. He wanted to hold on to
his baby brother so asshole princes couldn’t hurt him, but Dean knew the damage
was already done. Dean stayed silent to see if there was anything else Sam
wanted to share.
He watched as Sam pulled out a box from under his bed. The box had postcards
his therapist made for Sam. Dean knew the box contained blank postcards for Sam
to fill out since Ash knew Sam had always communicated his feelings via
postcards. Ash’s reasoning on continuing with the postcards as opposed to a
journal was simple, “Why try something new when we already have a method that
works?” These postcard had lines though and no space for postage so Sam could
write more if he wanted. Dean couldn’t argue that point. Of course, Dean also
knew the odds of him writing down his feelings anywhere were slim to none.
Dean watched Sam write on the back of the postcard.
“I gave up at Lucifer’s hands, not Master’s. I felt helpless and degraded. I
thought I was going to die but I didn’t. I just died inside. I haven’t been
beaten or touched in a bad way since I’ve been free. I don’t miss getting hurt.
I like being surrounded by people who love and respect me and who don’t hurt
me.”
Dean didn’t say anything when Sam put the postcard away. It wasn’t until after
Sam put the box back under his bed that Dean felt Sam giving him a hug. Dean
smiled and whispered, “I love you, Sammy.”
***** Chapter 37 *****
Sam had been free for two years now and it had been difficult for Dean. He was
glad to have his brother back but it had taken a toll. Dean wasn’t sure if it
was good or bad. He liked to think it was good. Sam was doing a lot better. His
little brother had started talking to people, even strangers at times.
Dean was fairly certain his boss, Benny, about had a heart attack the first
time Sam said something to him. Benny had always talked to Sam like Sam was
replying to what he was saying. Unlike some people, Benny never talked down to
Sam. Benny knew Sam understood what he was saying so he just talked him like a
normal person.
Sam never went into personal conversations with anyone, which Dean could
understand. Sam didn’t want anyone knowing he was a slave. The brand on Sam’s
neck was barely visible. In the right light, Dean could see it a little bit but
it just looked like a burn. Dean couldn’t make out that it was a brand. Still
Sam knew it was a brand and he still covered it up with a thin bandage before
leaving the house. He never argued that with Sam because all he needed was some
snot nosed kid to ask their parents what happened to Sam’s neck. Dean knew that
would cause a meltdown.
Dean was also happy that Sam had taken to walking around out in public by
himself. Sam never went far, but he did go out on his own. Generally, Sam would
go get the mail and there was a coffee shop down the street he liked to walk to
on Saturday mornings to have breakfast by himself. Dean thought it was good
that Sam was able to do that. He also knew that he was overprotective. He had
followed Sam to the coffee shop a few times to make sure he was okay.
It turned out, Sam would just order a coffee with way more caffeine than should
be allowed with some sort of breakfast pastry. Then Sam would sit off to the
side, drink his coffee and eat his breakfast while he read the paper. There was
nothing odd going on. Dean checked. He even broke into the coffee shop after
closing to check, just to be on the safe side. Sam just found something he
enjoyed. Dean was grateful Sam seemed to be finding his place in the world.
Dean's main problem in life was actually not Sam. It was what to do about his
relationship with Castiel. He knew that logically for their relationship to
progress they would have to move in together. Sam was always apprehensive and
nervous around Castiel. Dean knew that he and Sam could not move in with Cas or
the other way around with Sam clearly not being okay with it.
He could understand that because moving in with Castiel would mean that they
would end up being in direct contact with Castiel’s brothers. All of whom Dean
found out had at one time or another tortured Sam. Dean knew there was no way
he would ever make Sam have to face them again. He also knew that it was
unlikely Sam would even try to defend himself if one of them tried to hurt him
again.
Dean knew there was no progressing, short of running away together to another
country. He felt like he was being unfair to Castiel. Cas had always been
understanding about Sam and never pushed. Cas paid money to help Sam get
better, even though Sam doesn’t know that. Castiel had never once complained or
pushed about moving in together.  Dean really couldn’t say if Castiel was happy
with the way their relationship was or not.
He just couldn’t help but feel like he was cheating Castiel somehow. Surely,
Cas wanted to get married, claim his title as one of the princes so everyone
would revere him instead of working the graveyard shift in a local ER, and
maybe adopt a couple kids or something. Dean didn’t know. He just thought Cas
deserved more than what he was getting from him. Dean knew he couldn’t give
Castiel more. He couldn’t give Castiel a happily ever after because Dean had a
responsibility to Sam and Dean knew he would carry that responsibility for the
rest of his life.
Dean’s father being the ever helpful person that he was. Thought it would be a
good idea for them to go on a hunt. First of all, Dean didn’t like the idea of
Sammy going on a hunt. Sam had a laundry list of problems that would not be
helped by hunting. For instance, Sam’s fear of loud noises or how Sam will
freeze if someone bumps into him. Dean was fairly certain an angry spirit
throwing Sam across the room would give him catatonic Sam for an undetermined
amount of time.
Secondly, John thought it would be a good idea for Castiel to come along.
Somehow, Dean did not think giving Castiel a gun and a knife in front of Sam
would help Sam overcome his fear of Castiel. He also doubted Sam would even
pick up a weapon in front of Castiel. Dean knew that on the code of conduct for
a slave that was forbidden and he knew Sam still adhered to some of those
rules. John had a good reason though. John wanted Sam to loosen up around Cas
and he thought some bonding time would help. Only the Winchesters would think a
hunt was bonding.
Third and most importantly, the hunt was down south and about 10 miles from
Gabriel’s mansion. There was the very real chance they could run into Gabriel
or one of the guards who work at Gabriel’s mansion. Dean knew Castiel could
send the guards away, but Castiel pulling rank on people in front of Sam was
not a good way for Sam to ‘bond’ with Castiel.
The drive was awkward and Dean was fairly certain Sam was going to have a panic
attack. They all rode together in Baby. John drove with Dean in the passenger
seat with Castiel and Sam sitting in back. It was an odd seating arrangement,
but Sam didn’t want anyone sitting behind him. Well, Dean knew Sam didn’t want
Castiel sitting behind him. Sam was as far away from Cas as he could manage on
the drive and Dean just felt bad for Sammy and Castiel, who didn’t know how to
make it better.
About halfway there John started to talk about the case. He kept his voice
strictly business. “The children of the school board members have been getting
killed. Their bodies burnt to nothing which is making it difficult to identify
what is killing them. I am thinking vengeful spirit. We are going to need to
look into what the kids have in common and see if their parents managed to piss
someone off. Dean and I are going to go interview the families. Once we get to
the motel, I want Sam and Castiel to do research on the families. I want to
find every unsavory connection we can to get to the bottom of this.”
Dean groaned and said calmly, “Dad, why don’t Cas and I interview people while
you and Sam to research?”
John shook his head no and said adamantly, “No, we are all using our strong
points for the first part of this hunt. Castiel and Sammy are better at
research.”
Dean sighed to himself. This was going to be a long hunt.
++
Castiel was alone in a motel room with Sam. He wanted to say something, but he
had no idea what to say. Sam sat quietly at the table as he stared at his
laptop. Cas didn’t know what he was looking up. He figured it might be news
articles on the school board members, but he wasn’t sure.
Castiel was looking at his own computer. As a Novak, Castiel was able to easily
gain access to anything. He was sifting through the bank account records of the
school board members. It was odd because he could see where each of them were
wired money from an anonymous source starting about 10 years ago.  Castiel did
a trace back to see where the funds came from and he was surprised to see that
the funds came from Michael. Cas wasn’t sure what to make of that, but he knew
it wasn’t good if his brother was somehow connected to this.
He didn’t have a chance to dwell on that though because he heard Sam’s phone
ring. Cas watched as Sam tentatively answered it. “Hey Dean. Hold on, I am
going to put you on speaker so you don’t have to repeat yourself.” Castiel
watched as Sam put his phone on speaker and held it in between them. “Okay
Dean, what do you have?”
Cas heard Dean clear his throat and say gruffly, “So I looked at the crime
scene photos and off to the side on a table or something; there was a horn
filled with fresh fruit. It could be nothing, but it struck me as odd for a
horn to be in perfect condition with a kid burnt to a crisp a few feet away.”
Sam questioned Dean, “So there is cornucopia at each crime scene?”
Dean sounded annoyed when he replied, “No Sammy, Cornelius was not at the crime
scene.”Cas laughed to himself because only his Dean would reference 1960s and
1970s sci-fi.
Castiel watched Sam’s posture change to something of doubt and uncertainty with
Dean’s words. He took it upon himself to clarify. “Dean, a cornucopia is also
called a horn of plenty. People fill them with fresh fruit, nuts, or flowers.
Now a days, it is typically just a table decoration in the fall which for the
farms is the time of harvest… A time when there would be plenty.”
 A moment later Dean replied with the aggravation gone from his voice, “Huh,
it’s summer, not fall.”
Sam shook his head and said with reservation. “I will look into it and see if I
can find anything that connects it.”
After Sam hung up, Castiel went back to looking at the bank accounts. He
honestly didn’t think much about the cornucopia. He couldn’t fathom how it was
connected. He stared at the accounts for what felt like hours before he
requested the names of anyone else who had received a transfer around the same
time from Michael.
Castiel was surprised that every member of the school board and the principle
received a money transfer. He looked a little closer at the date and he
realized it about a week after the next round of slaves were selected. Calmly
Castiel said, “I have the names of the other families that may be targeted.”
Sam looked up at Castiel blankly and asked, “What do you mean, Sir?”
Castiel suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. He remained perfectly calm, “Sam,
please call me Cas or Castiel.” He paused and added, “I found that each of the
victim’s families had money wired from Michael’s account after a new slave was
selected each year. It looks like all the school board members and the
principle at the high school got a payout from Michael. I just don’t know why.”
Sam nodded and asked tentatively, “Are any of the slaves selected alive and
free? They might know something.”
Castiel gave a curious look and queried on his computer. “Most of them are
dead, unfortunately, and they all came from transient families. There is one a
Ruby Benton.” Castiel clicked on the photo of her from when she was a slave and
murmured, “Oh my God.”
Sam looked at Castiel curiously, “What is it?”
Castiel swallowed hard and said with strain in his voice, “You know her, Sam.
Ruby was one of Gabriel’s slaves. I think he called her Lollipop.”
Sam scrunched up his brow and said with confusion, “Do you think she is doing
this for revenge?”
Slowly Castiel said, “I don’t know, but if they got paid to turn her into a
slave is it right to stop her?”
Sam looked off to the side for a moment and said carefully, “We don’t know that
she actually did anything yet. She could be innocent. Besides, she wasn’t
exactly a nice person.”
Castiel frowned and said calmly, “Sam, she was scared. I don’t think it was
personal.”
Sam shook his head and said quietly, “She was mean to me. She called me names
and mocked me with the guards. I always kept my distance from her.” He paused
and chuckled, “Lollipop did try to seduce Master a couple times. He punished
her, but I am not sure how.”
He gave Sam a sympathetic look and said, “I’m sorry, Sam. You never deserved to
be treated like that.” Castiel felt a pit grow in his stomach. If Ruby was
behind the murders. Then Gabriel could be in danger. He made a point of not
letting Gabriel or his brothers know where he was. However, Castiel knew they
could find out with a couple of simple phone calls.
++
Dean and John returned later with a whole lot of nothing. Except the knowledge
that they would have to interview Ruby or Lollipop. Dean had no idea what name
she went by these days. He paced back and forth as he tried to figure out what
to do. There wasn’t a manual on how to deal with this.
Instead of talking, John decided a good old fashioned breaking in and entering
when she wasn’t home would work. John decided to take everyone along for this.
His reasoning was simple. If things went south and the police got called,
Castiel could stop anything from happening.
It was early the next morning when they broke into Ruby’s small house on the
outskirts of town. Dean walked into her bedroom and started to look around with
Castiel by his side. He opened the closet door and found a witch’s shrine.
Inside the shrine was an old coin from the Roman Empire, standard witch crap,
and a photo of each of the children who were selected to be slaves from this
town.
Dean took the coin and with Castiel’s help destroyed the shrine. Once they were
done Castiel asked, “Is it over?”
Dean shook his head and looked at the coin, “I don’t think so.”
He looked down on the floor and saw a small photo box. Dean carefully opened it
up. It was filled with names, dates, and information. He shifted through the
information and found out that it was a list of all of the towns where school
officials were paid off to make sure a transient child’s name was drawn. The
money came from the Resistance.
Dean’s blood ran cold when he saw emails stating the children’s names that
would be drawn before the actual drawing. He realized in that moment the whole
thing was rigged.  The Resistance was setup by Michael to make it look like
there was an undercurrent. When really, anyone who thought of detracting were
doing Michael’s bidding. Michael build the Resistance secretly on the pretense
of ending slavery. When what he really did is corrupt those who were opposed to
it. Michael gave them a way to make sure their children were safe, while
screwing over someone else’s kid that they had very little chance of knowing.
Dean shifted through the emails until he found one from the school he was
attending with Sam when Sam was taken. His heart clenched when he read his own
name on the email. Only for his name to be rejected because he was the first
born and Sam’s name was put in his place. Dean realized it was supposed to be
him. He was supposed to become a slave, but because the Resistance as ruled by
Michael who did not want to kill the first born. Sam was taken. Dean had failed
Sam because he was older than Sam.
Dean felt his hand clench down on the paper and he heard his father’s voice.
“What did you find, Dean?”
He glanced over at his dad and handed him the emails. He choked out, “Sammy was
setup. The Resistance which Michael apparently funds handpicked Sammy’s name
after rejecting mine. They rejected me because I am your oldest. I failed.”
++
They had Ruby arrested for supernatural crimes, so Dean hoped that would be the
end of it. However Dean’s gut told him this was far from over. Castiel took the
information on the Resistance before the police came. Dean thought Castiel was
honestly upset about it which he could understand. It was just right now,
Castiel’s guilt or whatever was not what had him upset.
Dean was staring at the ceiling of the motel room drowning in his self-pity.
All he could think about was how it was supposed to be his name. Not Sam. It
should have been him, but he was older. He caused Sammy to get tortured for
years. He almost caused Sammy to die. Dean wondered how Sam could stand to be
in the same room as him. He felt a tear roll down his cheek. Dean had never
felt like more a failure.
Sam watched Dean since they had gotten back to the motel. He knew why Dean was
upset, but he also knew Dean shouldn’t be blaming himself. Quietly Sam said,
“Dean, it’s not your fault.”
Dean grunted and threw a pillow over his head. He mumbled, “Sammy, it should
have been me.”
Sam felt anger curl inside him and he angrily said to Dean, “Don’t ever say
that to me again. I lived and I got out. Granted, I am not the same person. But
how do you think I would feel if you had to go through what I went through? Or
worse, what if you died? The only reason Master took me in the first place was
because I defied the guards and he was watching me get beat. I looked at him
and he told me that I had the prettiest hazel eyes he had ever seen. That is
why he saved me. You. Don’t. Look. Like. Me.” Sam huffed out an angry breath
and continued. “I don’t want anyone to live through what I experienced and that
includes you, especially you.”
Dean groaned, “Sammy..”
Sam sharply said, “Dean, shut up. You can’t protect me from everything and I am
sorry you couldn’t protect me from what happened to me when I was a slave. I
don’t want you to get hurt and I am glad it was me and not you.”
Dean moved the pillow off of his face and said sheepishly, “I’m sorry, Sammy.”
Dean kept his eyes closed because he really didn’t want to see the look on
Sam’s face. These angry blow ups have been happening periodically now. Usually
it was about nothing in particular. This was the first one directed at Sam’s
time as a slave. Dean knew from talking with Ash that Sam would start to lash
out, so despite everything Dean took this as a healthy step.
Then Den heard rustling of a bag. He didn’t know who was doing what until he
heard what sounded like pages being flipped from his cherished binder. He
opened his eyes to see Sam flipping through it. Tiredly Dean asked, “What are
you doing, Sammy?”
Sam looked up at Dean and shrugged, “Looking for something.” Dean laid his head
back down and waited. A few minutes later, Dean heard Sam joyfully say, “I
found it.”
Dean sat up and let Sam hand him his binder of postcards. He looked down to see
a postcard Sam had written when he was about 12. Dean vaguely remembered the
city marked on the front of the postcard. All he knew was that he beat up some
punk kid that was bullying Sam. Dean read what Sam wrote.
“Someday, I hope I can save Dean because he saves me all the time. I will miss
going to school without being labeled.”
Dean looked up at Sam questioningly and Sam replied quietly, “I saved you.”
Before Dean could dwell on that too much. He heard a knock on their motel room
door. He looked over to see Castiel open the door to Gabriel. Then Dean heard
Gabriel say calmly, “Castiel, it is good to see you. If you don’t mind, I would
like to talk to Sam for a few minutes.”
***** Chapter 38 *****
John was watching his boys carefully. He knew that Dean was doing his
overprotective thing and Sam actually looked like he might be getting
legitimately mad or maybe understanding. John wasn’t sure. He did agree with
Sam that it was ridiculous for Dean to blame himself for what happened to Sam
because he was older.
When he heard a knock on the door, he didn’t think much of it since Castiel was
going to answer it. Then he heard Gabriel said calmly, “Castiel, it is good to
see you. If you don’t mind, I would like to talk to Sam for a few minutes.”
John felt his blood run cold. He was certain if it could turn to ice it would
have in that moment.
John hated Gabriel with every fiber of his being. Gabriel was the man who
brutalized his youngest son. John had heard from Sam what Gabriel did to him
and he knew he could never forgive Gabriel. Gabriel stole his son’s innocence
and trampled Sam’s soul until it was nearly nothing. John hated him for that.
The only thing John knew for certain is there was no way in Hell, Gabriel was
either getting near Sam or talking to him. John walked over to the motel room
door and ushered Castiel outside with him so they could talk to Gabriel.
Castiel readily went outside with John and John closed the door behind them.
Once John heard the door click locked. He gave Gabriel the death stare and
asked coldly, “Why do you want to talk to my son?”
Gabriel sighed then he winked at John. Playfully Gabriel said, “It’s personal.
Besides, I am pretty sure Sam would obey me over you. So why don’t you just let
me talk to him. Five minutes that is all I want.”
John moved toward Gabriel and grabbed hold of the front of his shirt. He swung
Gabriel around and slammed him against the wall. He growled at Gabriel and
said, “Sam is his own man. I am certain he thinks for himself. However, I will
not let the man that raped him and tortured him talk to him because I am his
father and I will protect him from you.”
Castiel saw two of Gabriel’s guards approaching with the commotion. He turned
toward them and said firmly, “The situation is under control. Be gone.” The
guards nodded at Castiel and backed off. Cas turned his attention back to
Gabriel and John. He had no desire to stop John at this point. He didn’t think
John was going to kill Gabriel, maybe attempt the knock some sense into him but
not kill him.
The only reason Castiel did not want John or Dean to kill Gabriel was because
Castiel was fairly certain Sam didn’t want that. Before Sam was broken, Sam had
every opportunity in the world in kill Gabriel and Castiel knew Sam could have
done it easily. Sam could still do it easily because Castiel knew that trapped
inside Sam somewhere was the part of him that knew how to execute a clean kill.
Castiel watched as Gabriel gave John a fake hurt look. He heard Gabriel say
innocently, “I never raped, Sam. I think he liked it most of the time.” He
smirked at John and said, “Little Sammy can moan like a whore if you get him
going.”
With that John punched Gabriel across the face as hard as he could. He felt a
crack in Gabriel’s face as he hit him. Gabriel’s head hit the wall and he had
to steady himself on the wall to keep from falling over. John could see
Gabriel’s nose bleeding and split lip. There was swelling on the side of
Gabriel’s face that would probably turn into a bruise.
John took a step back from Gabriel but still held him to the wall with one arm.
Gabriel wasn’t fighting back and John knew that regardless of how good it might
feel to beat the life out of Gabriel it would upset Sam. John knew that Sam
could interpret that behavior as something that could happen to him since Sam
still viewed himself below Gabriel.
Castiel gently nudged John away from Gabriel to stop the impending fight. He
was certain Gabriel stood very little chance against John. He had sparred with
John once before and Castiel remembered being rather sore afterwards. Then Dean
telling him that John went easy on him was enough for Castiel to want to take
an ice bath to help his sore muscles for the next week.
Once Gabriel and John were arm’s length apart. Castiel turned to Gabriel and
asked calmly, “Gabriel, I think it is unwise for you to be here. Sam is making
a lot of progress with acclimating back into society and I do not think your
presence will help.”
Gabriel stared at Castiel for a moment before sighing. His voice was slurred
because of the bloody nose causing blood to flow into his mouth as he spoke.
“Fine. Apparently, Lollipop summoned a god. She wouldn’t say which one. She
said that she cast a spell to get revenge on the people at her school who
selected her and the others to be a slaves. She cast the same spell to get
revenge on the person who hurt Sam the most.” Gabriel sounded desperate, “I
need to make sure I am not that person.”
Castiel eyed his brother for a moment. Then he said with agitation. “I can
promise you that it is either you, Michael, or Lucifer. What you’re saying
doesn’t make sense, the people that are getting killed are innocent in this.
None of them hurt Ruby or Sam.”
Gabriel sighed and said exhaustedly, “She used the word fairness a lot. She
said that they were getting only what was fair. I don’t know. All I know is I
need to make sure Sam doesn’t hate me. I know I did terrible things to him and
I regret that now. I can’t change what I did. If I could, I would probably
still have Sam with me and he wouldn’t be hurting so much inside.”
John spat at Gabriel, “He would never be with you no matter how nice you were
to him.”
Gabriel sighed and closed his eyes. He sounded defeated, “Perhaps not, but I
still need to know.”
Firmly Castiel said, “No. John will consider letting Sam know about your
request. I will not mention it to Sam. If John grants your request, I will text
you Sam’s response.”
++
Sam retreated to the far corner of the room in between the bed and the wall
after his dad left with Castiel. He knew they were talking to Gabriel. Sam
pulled his legs up to his chest and started rocking back and forth to try to
calm his nerves and not cry. His mind was pondering things quickly. He wondered
if his dad or Castiel were going to give him back to Gabriel. Sam didn’t want
that life again.
He didn’t want to know what Gabriel would ask of him. Sam had already given
Gabriel everything and more only to be called unfit. Sam had no idea what
Gabriel could possibly want from him. He had a horrifying thought of what if
Gabriel wanted to have sex with him again. Sam didn’t even know how to process
that and the idea of doing that again scared Sam to his core.
Sam knew Dean was kneeling on the floor in front of him a couple feet away and
talking gently to him. His thoughts were too loud to make out what Dean was
saying, but the low rumble of Dean’s voice still comforted him. Dean was here
and Gabriel never did anything too harsh in front of Dean so that was good.
Maybe Gabriel wouldn’t beat or fuck him. Maybe Gabriel would just make him
kneel and beg since Dean was here.
Distantly, Sam heard a loud thud. He knew someone was getting hurt outside. Sam
started to cry because he worried it was his dad. Sam loved his dad and he
didn’t want anything to happen to John because of him. Sam knew he wasn’t worth
the expense and he certainly wasn’t worth somebody’s life. Especially not his
dad’s life or Dean’s life, Sam was certain their lives were much more valuable
than his.
++
John came back into the motel room and walked over to where Sam and Dean were
sitting on the floor. He nodded at Dean who moved out of the way. Then John
pulled Sam up out of the corner. He sat his son on the bed and started to
lightly rub circles on Sam’s back. He kept his voice soft, “Hey Sammy, it’s
okay. You’re safe, nothing is going to happen to you.” He repeated those words
several times until Sam started to calm down.
Sam focused on his dad’s words and the warmth of his hand on him reminded Sam
that Gabriel didn’t hurt his dad and he could see Dean. So everyone was okay.
No one got hurt because of him. Sam thought that was good. It took Sam awhile
to find his voice, but when he did he brokenly asked, “W..What did Master
want?”
John frowned at Sam then wrapped an arm around Sam’s shoulder protectively.
Quietly and in an even voice he said, “Gabriel wanted to talk to you about the
hunt we have been working.”
Sam stilled and he felt his breathing start to pickup again. He thought Gabriel
came here to punish him for hunting. He knew that wasn’t allowed. He knew he
had broken into someone’s house. He had been bad and Gabriel knew that. Sam let
a couple tears fall down his face because he knew Gabriel would punish him
eventually. It was just a matter of time. Sam didn’t want to be punished
because he felt like he was helping people.
Sam rested his head on his father’s shoulder. He reached out a hand and grabbed
onto the front of John’s shirt in a silent hope that Gabriel wouldn’t take him
away from his family again. He started sobbing out in desperation again and he
felt John start to lightly pet his hair with his free hand as John held onto
him. It felt nice. It reminded of him when he was a little kid and he believed
his dad could make all the monsters go away. Sam wished he could still believe
his dad could make the monsters go away.
John knew that seeing Gabriel would set Sam off. He was grateful that Sam
didn’t seem compelled to see the man, but it still hurt to see how upset Sam
was by Gabriel’s appearance. John had never really been sure what Sam felt
toward Gabriel. He knew Gabriel had hurt Sam, but he also knew that Sam felt he
owed his life to Gabriel. John spoke softly once Sam started to calm down
again. “It’s okay, Sammy. I’m not going to let him hurt you. Gabriel had some
information on the case that he wanted to share. He said Ruby summoned a god to
extract revenge.”
Sam sniffled and pulled up from his father. He wiped his eyes with the back of
his hand. Then he said hoarsely, “Where is the coin Dean found?”
Dean quickly handed Sam the coin and he was surprised how quickly Sam pulled
himself together when he had something to focus on.
Sam studied the coin for a moment then he went over to his laptop. He could
feel the eyes of everyone in the room on him. He knew they were worried even
though he couldn’t begin to grasp why. It wasn’t like he was important or
anything. 
Sam returned to the search he had been working on before Castiel found the
connection to Ruby. He typed in the inscription on the coin. The coin was Roman
and from the third century. He smiled at his findings because everything fell
into to place in Sam’s mind.
Quietly Sam said, “The god is Equitas. The Roman goddess of fairness. She is
said to balance power between two groups of people. In this case, the people
who wrongfully enslaved Ruby and the others at her school are losing their
children out of fairness to create a balance.” He paused and added, “The
cornucopia at the crime scene is one of the items she is often depicted with.”
Dean shook his head and asked calmly, “If this is about fairness, then why is
Equitas going after the kids of the assholes and not the assholes themselves.”
Sam shrugged and said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Because it was their kids that they were protecting.”
John glanced at Sam and asked carefully, “How do we kill her or get her to
stop?”
Sam studied his screen for a moment then he said tentatively, “I think the
people who were wronged have to feel like they were treated fairly. If the
balance is believed to be there; she will do nothing. I don’t think there is an
easy way to kill her.”
Dean grumbled, “Great.”
John looked over at Castiel and swallowed hard. He knew he had to ask Sam. John
took a moment to clear his throat before asking, “Sammy, Gabriel said that Ruby
cast the same spell for you. He said it would hurt the person who hurt you the
most. Do you know who that might be or if you feel someone had treated you
unfairly?”
Sam swallowed hard. He could think of a lot of people who had treated him
unfairly. The people at his school that turned him into a slave, the guards,
Michael and Lucifer, and a boatload of other people. However there were two
names that stuck out in Sam’s mind, “Zachariah but he is already dead. Master
killed him.” He paused and said, “Azazel is the other one. He is one of
Lucifer’s guards. Azazel is cruel.”
Castiel knew who Azazel was. He had ordered Azazel away from Sam more than
once. He knew Azazel took part in beating Sam on his first night as a slave. He
also knew that Azazel had tormented Sam after that whenever Sam was left alone.
Castiel did not know the specifics of what Azazel did but he found it hard to
believe it was worse than what Michael, Lucifer, and Gabriel did.
Carefully Castiel said, “So should we just let this play out?”
Dean shook his head and said regretfully, “We could try to summon her ourselves
and have Sammy ask her to stop.”
++
Three hours later they were in an abandoned warehouse and summoning Equitas.
She appeared before them. She had beautiful golden brown hair that flowed in
waves down to her waist. She wore a simple and elegant white dress that lightly
touched her toes. Her skin had a golden glow to it and her eyes were brown like
the desert. She was beautiful. In her hands she held a cornucopia and a staff. 
Sam stepped forward nervously. He played with his hands and did not look at her
as he spoke. He was afraid of her. He stammered out when he spoke, “Ru..Ruby
said that she summoned you to enact fairness on the people who wronged us. Is
that true?”
Equitas smiled at Sam. She stepped forward and ran a hand down Sam’s face and
rested it over his neck where the brand was. Her voice was kind, “Samuel
Winchester, your soul is strong. I can feel it but you have been treated
unfairly. I am here to make that right.”
Sam looked around with pleading eyes as he started to shake. He was terrified.
He whispered out, “I don’t want you to hurt anyone on my behalf. I’m not worth
it.”
Equitas removed her hand from Sam’s neck. Then she walked past him. She eyed
Castiel for a moment then she sat her gaze upon John and Dean. She frowned and
said regretfully, “I know. You’ll be happy to know that most of those murdered
and tortured like yourself do not want those who hurt them to die. Some of my
acts have been less noticeable. I balanced the monies between some of the
effected and other things, but you are different Samuel. You are a puzzle.”
Equitas turned her attention back to Castiel and she walked over to him. She
stopped in front of Castiel and said, “You’ve tried to make amends for the
actions of your brothers. You used your family’s wealth to help repair the
damage done to Sam. You tried and failed to protect Sam many times. You are
balanced.”
Castiel glanced over at Dean for some sort of support. He hoped Equitas
wouldn’t just smite him and he knew that could very easily happen. Nervously
Castiel stated, “Thank you, Equitas. I..ah.. So are you done here?”
Equitas shrugged and walked back over to Sam. She ran a hand around the back of
his shoulders and spoke calmly, “Your brand is gone.” She reached up and
touched Sam on the side of his face. Sam grimaced slightly before she moved her
hand away. “I have eased your mind. It will not completely take away all your
reservations about being part of society and the fear you feel inside but it
will help. Gabriel, who hurt you the most, carries inside of him the same level
of pain that you now have.”
Sam looked at her in confusion. He felt different. He still ached inside but it
was different. Sam wasn’t sure if this was good or bad. He croaked out, “Why
did you to that for me?”
Equitas smiled and said sweetly, “Equality is not always made by punishing
those who have more. Sometimes it is made by giving those who have less a
chance.” She paused and looked at Sam longingly, “Samuel, you are worth it.
Your value is no less and no greater than anyone else’s value. Good luck.” Then
Equitas disappeared before them in a cloud of golden smoke. She left behind a
cornucopia filled with fresh fruit.
++
Sam stood in front of the mirror in the motel bathroom. His brand was
completely gone. His skin was smooth and unmarked. It was like it never
happened. Sam ran his hand over his smooth neck almost reverently. He wanted to
cry with happiness but he reframed himself. He felt like a real person again.
He wasn’t marked as slave.
Sam took off his shirt and looked at the other scars littering his body. He
knew which ones came from hunts and which ones came from when he was a slave.
Each one held a story for Sam. It held a story about how he survived. He felt
better inside. He knew he wasn’t ready to take on the world but he felt that
maybe he could take on his own life. He wondered if he had inside himself to be
more than a mailroom clerk at Dean’s work.
He threw his shirt back on and left the bathroom. Sam smiled at Dean and
Castiel. He thought they were good for each other. Sam knew he couldn’t be part
of Dean’s life if Dean took the next step with Castiel. Sam wasn’t about to ask
Dean not to do that, but at the same time, he knew he couldn’t put himself at
risk like that. He felt a pain in his chest when he thought about losing Dean.
Sam knew he would still have his father, but Dean had always been his closest
friend. Sam wondered if he was Dean’s friend or if he was just the little
brother.
Sam picked up the postcard, he bought on the way back to the motel. It had a
picture of the courthouse on it for the town they were in. He smiled at the
photo. Then he flipped over the card to write.
“I found out what fairness means today and what it feels like to be treated
fairly. I grew up thinking that all the gods and monsters are here to do evil.
I was wrong but I still miss the simplicity of life when I was a child.”
***** Chapter 39 *****
Castiel should have known that Ruby’s statement would draw the attention of
Michael and Lucifer. It was a few weeks after the hunt and he had been asked to
join his brothers for a meeting. More concerning to Castiel was the fact that
they had asked that he bring Dean along. Cas did not like Dean being anywhere
near his brothers.
Still, Castiel obeyed because there wasn’t much point in not obeying. His older
brothers would get their way like they always did. Castiel entered their dining
room with Dean by his side. He knew Dean wasn’t happy about the meeting and he
couldn’t blame Dean. He wasn’t happy about it either.
Castiel saw that Michael, Eve, Lucifer and Lilith have already gathered. They
were waiting on Gabriel. A few minutes later Gabriel joined them looking rather
tired. Castiel didn’t think much about it because as time went on he cared less
and less for his brothers’ wellbeing.
Castiel sat across from Gabriel at the table with Dean sitting next to him.
Michael spoke first and his voice was commanding, “Gabriel, Lollipop stated
that she cast the same spell for Sam’s sake. Did anything happen to you?”
Gabriel glanced up at Michael and sighed, “No Michael, I think she was lying.”
Michael nodded and asked, “Castiel, did you notice any changes in Sam? Any
supernatural influences?”
Castiel shook his head no and said firmly, “No, I did not. I was with Sam when
Equitas was summoned. She stated that Ruby did not cast a spell for him. I
included that in my report.” Castiel knew he was lying but he knew there was no
way he was going to tell his brothers the truth. Telling them the truth would
only get Sam hurt.
Lucifer hummed for a moment. He tapped his fingers on the table and said
bluntly, “Freeing the slaves is becoming a problem. They cry about how they
were treated and now they are plotting against us. We should have them all
killed.”
Gabriel glanced up and said firmly, “No that would lead to rebellion.”
Lucifer chuckled and he had a gleam in his eyes that Castiel had seen before.
It was the same gleam he saw when Lucifer murdered his mother. “It is a purge,
Gabriel. The former slaves acted out against us, therefore, they should be
punished.”
Castiel glared at Lucifer and stated harshly, “The former slaves never acted
against us, brother. They acted against the Resistance. The Resistance was
rigging the drawing if we had found out about the rigging all of those killed
would have been executed by us along with the rest of their family. Unless one
of us is funding the Resistance, I don’t think we have anything to worry
about.”
Lucifer laughed and said playfully, “Does that mean you are going to join us
when we have the next execution, Cassie? I would really like to see you
strangle someone. I know you want too.”
Castiel scowled at his older brother and said, “Screw you, Luci.”
Michael sighed and demanded, “Enough.” He paused and turned to Eve. His voice
softened, “Eve, you were a slave once. What do you think we should do?”
Eve was silent for a moment then she got what Castiel referred to as the evil
look. She giggled and stated, “Kill the detractor's families and make some
examples out of the children at the school. Personally, I think we should
massacre all of the firstborns. It would get the point across not to mess with
us.”
Michael kissed Eve passionately on the lips. Then he pulled back, “Lollipop and
Sam?”
Eve palmed Michael’s crotch and said, “Lilith and I should kill her. Sam didn’t
do anything but maybe he still needs to be punished just not killed.” Eve
leaned forward and started nipping on Michael’s ear lobe.
Michael groaned and said breathlessly, “Okay, I like it. Gabriel, do you want
to punish Sam?”
Castiel made eye contact with Gabriel briefly then Gabriel stated clearly,
“Yes, I can but I wish to do it in private.”
Lucifer frowned and recanted, “It needs to be public so the public knows what
happens when we are acted against. Sam may be innocent in this but his name was
mentioned. The public needs to know that is enough to elicit punishment.”
Dean spoke up from where he was sitting next to Castiel. “Me, you can punish me
instead of Sam. I am the first born, so you can punish the first born in the
former slave’s family. That may send a stronger message than just beating a
slave. People are used to seeing slaves get beaten.”
Castiel closed his eyes and wished this was not happening right now. He started
to speak but was cut off by Michael. “Dean, I like the way you think. I agree
with punishing you instead of Sam.” He paused, “Castiel, do you wish to do it
or should Gabriel?”
Castiel did not want to tap into that side of him. He didn’t even know for sure
if he had it in him to torture someone, much less someone he loved. However, he
did know that he had a darkness inside of him because his brothers all had it
so he must too. He closed his eyes and said regretfully, “I can’t hurt, Dean.”
He turned to look at Dean, “I’m sorry.”
Michael smirked and said, “Gabriel, it is then. I can’t wait to see if Dean can
take a beating as well as his little brother.”
++
Behind the closed doors of Castiel’s private quarters, he turned to Dean.
Angrily Castiel asked, “Are you insane?”
Dean smirked and plopped down on the sofa. He stretched out and threw one of
his feet up on the coffee table. Dean let out a little-contented groan and said
in collected voice, “It was either I take a beating or Sam does. Trust me, I
can handle it.” He paused and turned to look at Castiel, “Are you inferring
that I should have let Sammy get beat by Gabriel again?”
Castiel crossed his arms and said firmly, “No, I was not. I just don’t want to
see you get hurt.”
Dean rolled his eyes and said smugly, “Then you should have volunteered to
spank my ass.”
Castiel turned and rested his head against the wall. He did not want this to
happen. Gabriel was going to tear Dean apart. He knew it. He started to rub his
head against the wall. Cas really wasn’t sure why he was doing that but it
seemed like a better idea than banging his head against the wall which was what
he wanted to do.
Castiel knew he had to think of something to do to help. He had to think of
something to stop Dean from getting hurt.
++
The day of the executions came quickly in Dean’s opinion. Michael had asked Sam
come with him to the execution. Actually, it wasn’t so much asking as it was
telling. Dean didn’t want Sam there, but he knew there wasn’t a choice in the
matter. Sam had to be there. The executions were taking place at the main
mansion so Dean, Sam, and John were all staying with Castiel in Castiel’s
private quarters.
Sam found it necessary to clean the quarters for Castiel, which Dean wasn’t
sure if that was Sam acting on prior training or if he was just trying to work
off some of his nerves. Dean knew Sam was pretty pissed about him taking a
beating for Sam. Dean also knew Sam didn’t think he could handle it. That made
Dean wonder how bad it could really be. He knew he could take more than Sam. He
was the big brother so it was his job to be stronger than Sam. He wished he had
a way to show off his awesomeness to Sam without getting beaten by Sam’s former
master.
Dean sat next to Sam during the executions. He watched some of it, but
eventually he had to turn his head away. The Novaks were brutal and this was
the first time, Castiel had ever been seen with them. Dean saw Castiel sitting
with his brothers and their wives. However, Castiel did not execute a single
person. He didn’t do anything to stop them, but he also did not join in. Dean
could tell the media was focusing more on Castiel and Gabriel. Gabriel was
rarely seen at family functions and Castiel was new for them. They now had a
face to put with the name.
From what Dean watched of the executions, Eve was the cruelest. She would
slowly flay those who she was killing. She would disfigure them until they no
longer looked human. Dean remembered distinctly that she called them her little
monsters. Eve always let them die slowly the same way, by choking on their own
blood.
During the executions, Dean noticed that Sam just looked glazed. His eyes were
looking towards the arena where the executions were taking place, but Sam’s
eyes were glazed over. Dean doubted Sam was actually seeing anything right now.
He was fairly certain Sam was lost inside his own head. Dean figured that was
for the best anyways. Sam didn’t need to remember this.
After by Dean’s estimate, half the town that Ruby lived in was executed. Ruby
herself was executed. It was lackluster compared to the rest. Michael stabbed
her in her abdomen and let her die on the blood soaked ground.
Dean knew he was next. Michael walked away from Ruby’s body and spoke in a
commanding tone that Dean found downright terrifying, but he would never tell
Sam that. “Lollipop, the worthless former slave she was, decided to try to drag
other former slaves down with her. Lollipop stated in her confession that the
revenge spell she cast for herself, she also did the same spell for Sam.”
Michael paused and turned his gaze toward Sam. “It is my understanding that
this accusation on Lollipop’s part is false.  My younger brothers Castiel and
Gabriel have both spoken of Sam’s innocence. Gabriel was Sam’s Master but he
found Sam to be worthless. Castiel still seems to have a fondness for him
though.”
Michael walked over to Sam and much to Dean’s dismay pulled Sam way from his
side by Sam’s hair. Dean watched as Sam did not struggle against Michael’s
hold. Sam just accepted whatever was to come. Michael threw Sam down on the
ground in a puddle of blood. Dean saw Sam’s hands dip into the blood and then
Dean saw something he had not seen in years. Sam looked up at Michael with
defiance. Dean realized that out of all the times for Sam to find his inner
strength, right now was probably the worst possible time. Michael wouldn’t just
rough Sam up a little bit; Michael would kill Sam.
Michael lifted up his arm to hit Sam and the only thing Dean could think in
that moment was it was supposed to be him, not Sam. He watched as Michael
backhanded Sam a couple times and laughed. Michael took a couple steps back
from Sam and then Dean watched as Michael urinated on Sam. As Michael did the
deed, Dean did not notice Castiel getting up out of his chair.
As Michael finished peeing on Sam, Castiel shoved Michael out of the way and
handed Sam a towel. Castiel sneered at Michael in front of the cameras of the
media, “You disgust me.”
Michael calmly tucked himself back in then he turned to Castiel. He grabbed
hold of Castiel’s throat and growled, “Why are you defending a worthless
slave?”
Castiel ripped Michael’s hand away from his throat and said sternly, “Sam is
not a slave. He is a free man and you just hurt him for no reason. Of course,
when he was a slave you never needed a reason to hurt him either. Even though,
he belonged to Gabriel that didn’t stop you and Lucifer from brutalizing him.”
Dean watched as Gabriel stood up and walked over to the unfolding Novak
domestic dispute. Gabriel wiped the blood off his hands from his kills. He
walked past Michael and Castiel then to Dean’s horror, Gabriel approached Sam.
He helped wipe the pee off of Sam’s face and arms. Then he helped Sam stand.
Dean could not hear what Gabriel was saying to Sam but it was evident to Dean
that Gabriel was removing Sam from the situation.
Dean watched as Gabriel handed Sam over to one of his personal guards. Dean
recognized the guard from Gabriel’s mansion. The guard was kind to a fault as
Dean recalled. Still, he was nervous about Sam leaving with him. Dean didn’t
know if Gabriel was using this as an opportunity to take Sam away forever. He
definitely wouldn’t put it past Gabriel.
He reluctantly turned his attention back to Castiel and Michael. Michael looked
smug as always and playfully said, “Castiel, you are a disgrace to your family.
You spend all your time and money trying to help the former slaves live a nice
little life. When are you going to learn that they are nothing?”
Castiel’s nostrils flared in anger and said harshly, “They were never nothing.
My mother, who Lucifer killed, was not nothing. She was something very special
to me. Sam, who you just degraded, is very important to his family and to me.”
Michael chuckled and said smugly, “I would say you have a crush on the
overgrown slave, but I know your crush is on his big brother. So tell me
Castiel, is this a ploy to get them both in bed?”
Castiel scowled at Michael, “No, I am not like that.”
Michael nodded his head and two of his guards grabbed onto Castiel’s arms. Dean
watched as Castiel struggled in their hold. Michael just laughed, “Don’t worry
little brother, I’m not going to hurt you. I am just going to let Gabriel and
maybe some others have their way with your boyfriend. I must say I am impressed
that you landed such a beautiful man. Of course, he is the brother of a slave
but right now I think he is more handsome than the slave. Why don’t we see if
we can make a matching set?”
Castiel struggled greatly to get out of the firm hold. He shouted at Michael,
“Leave him alone!”
Dean felt himself get pulled from where he was sitting in the arena. They threw
him down where Sam was moments before. Dean knew full well he was half laying
in a puddle of piss and blood. The thought made his stomach turn.
Dean pulled himself up out of the puddle slightly and he saw Gabriel crouched
down in front of him. He felt Gabriel grab onto the back of his head and
whisper in his ear, “Deano, this is getting out of control fast. Put on a good
show so I don’t really have to hurt you.” Dean barely registered the first few
punches Gabriel landed on him. It didn’t hurt.  
On instinct or maybe stubbornness, Dean started to dodge Gabriel’s punches.
Gabriel sighed and Dean felt two guards take hold of his arms to hold him
still. Dean watched as Michael handed Gabriel a knife. Gabriel looked at the
knife then back to Michael. He tossed the knife aside and said with disgust. “I
am not going to cut him. I never cut his brother.”
Michael grinned and growled, “Fine, Alistair will cut him.”
If Dean had to describe Alistair. It would be evil. The man just looked evil.
If Dean didn’t know better, he would think Alistair was from Hell. Alistair was
one of Lucifer’s guards. If there was one thing Dean knew about the Novaks, it
was if you wanted a sadistic guard Lucifer had several to pick from. The first
thing Alistair did when he approached Dean was spit in his face.
Dean did his best to look defiantly at Alistair, but Alistair just grinned and
shoved the blade of a pocket knife into his thigh. Dean screamed with the
unexpected pain. Then he felt Alistair rip his shirt off. Dean watched as
Alistair nicked around his chest with a razor. Dean could see the blood start
to trickle down his chest. It didn’t hurt that bad. He groaned when Alistair
rubbed salt into the wounds.
Then Alistair circled around Dean to his back. He said with amusement, “I am
going to make your back match your brother's.”  Then Alistair started cutting.
It was short little nicks into the flesh of his back at different points. Some
were shallow and others were deep. At first, Dean only groaned out in pain, but
before long Dean was trembling and sobbing in pain.
Dean could feel his blood flowing down his back and his pants were wet with his
own blood. He wanted it to stop but Alistair had only carved one of shoulder
blades. Dean knew he had the rest of his back to go and there was no way he
could handle it. As Alistair started on the next shoulder blade, Dean felt his
knees give out. He was now being held up completely by the guards.
He screamed and cried until he had nothing left inside of himself. Only silent
tears fell down his face, then when Alistair moved on to his mid-back, Dean
begged. “Please stop. Please.”
Michael nodded at Alistair to stop and he asked with pleasure oozing from his
voice. “Why should I do that Dean?”
Dean looked up and tried to focus on Michael. He was a little blurry. He could
still hear Castiel yelling at Michael to end this. Dean whispered out, “I
ca..can’t take it. Please.” Michael nodded again and Dean felt the guards let
go of him and he fell to the ground. Dean didn’t even care that he was laying
in filth. At least he wasn’t getting hurt anymore. He wondered distantly how
many times Sam had felt that same feeling.
Then Dean felt Castiel’s arms wrap around him. He felt his head resting in
Castiel’s lap. Dean wondered if Castiel realized what he was sitting in, but he
didn’t ask. Castiel was crying, “I’m sorry, Dean. I’m so sorry. Please stay
with me, it’s going to be okay.” Dean couldn’t though. He couldn’t focus that
much anymore. All he knew was that Castiel was here and somehow Castiel was
going to protect him from his psychopathic brothers. Dean felt himself drift
into the abyss.
 ++
When Dean woke up, he was laying on his stomach. It took him a minute to
realize he was in his own bed in his apartment. He wondered how he got here.
Dean could feel an IV in his arm and he felt the bandages on his back. He
smelled like antiseptic and Dean hoped that Castiel gave him something to make
sure he didn’t catch something from what he was laying in.
He looked around his room and he saw it was empty. Dean started to try to get
up but he found it was too difficult. He groaned and reached under his bed. He
pulled out his binder of postcards. Dean put it down in front of him and he
turned his head to look at it.
Dean opened it to a random page and read what Sam wrote.
“Dean and I flew on a plane today for the first time and Dean freaked out. I’ll
miss believing that nothing can scare my big brother.”
Dean closed the binder and groaned his mind raced back to Gabriel. He felt
himself fill with panic because the last thing he remembered was Gabriel taking
Sam. He knew he had to get up because he had to make sure Sam was okay. 
***** Chapter 40 *****
Chapter Notes
     I feel like I should apologize for this chapter in advance. So um...
     sorry.
     The first section includes graphic rape.
Sam felt like he was on a death march when he got led to Gabriel’s private
quarters. It was a place he hoped to never see again, yet here he was. The
guards led him into Gabriel’s bathroom. They ordered him to get in the bathtub
and lay down. Sam knew he didn’t have any options, short of making a suicidal
stand.  He pondered briefly if that would be a better option, but he decided
against it. Sam had faith that Castiel would somehow manage to get him out of
this.
He laid down in the tub and he felt the guards secure his wrists to either side
of the tub. Sam remembered when Gabriel made that renovation. It was so Gabriel
could punish him. Gabriel would alternate between running burning hot water on
him to freezing cold water. Sometimes, as Sam recalled, Gabriel just liked to
get him to the point where he was shivering so Gabriel could warm him up.
So now here he was, 23 years old tied down in Gabriel’s bathtub while covered
in Michael’s piss. Sam was not happy about this situation. He waited for
Gabriel for about an hour maybe more. Sam wasn’t really sure. By that time he
was shivering from his wet clothes but he had gotten used to the piss smell.
Sam wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.
Gabriel stopped in the doorway of the bathroom. He could see that Sam was angry
and he had that look of defiance that he loved so much. He walked into the room
and sat down on the edge of the bathtub. Gabriel didn’t touch Sam. He just
watched him. Sam had very handsome features and he had grown into a very
muscular man. Gabriel knew he pushed Sam to gain muscle as a teenager; he knew
if he didn’t then Sam would just be lanky and awkward looking with his height.
After a few moments of silence Gabriel said calmly, “It is nice to see you,
Sam.”
Sam turned his head to look at Gabriel. He could feel his heart pounding in his
chest. He was afraid but he tried not to let it show. Sam let out a slow breath
and said with reservation, “Please let me go, Master.”
Gabriel leaned back and acted like he was thinking for a moment. He hummed and
then he replied playfully, “No, I am not going to let you go. I will tell you
what I am going to do though. I am going to get you cleaned up. You are going
to fuck me and then we are going to talk about how you need a master.”
Before Sam had a chance to argue. Gabriel turned the water on as hot as it
would go through the showerhead. It sprayed down on Sam’s body and the
scorching temperature made him jerk away. The water was relentless on him but
it didn’t last long. He opened his eyes when the water was turned off. He
looked at Gabriel as he tried to catch his breath. Sam wanted this to stop. He
whispered out, “Please don’t do this to me again.”
Gabriel picked up the scissors he retrieved while the water was washing off
Michael’s pee. He shook his head no and made a noise of a reprimand as he
started to cut off Sam’s clothes. Sam turned his head to the side as not to
face Gabriel as he did this. This happening was one of the nightmares that woke
him up at night. He couldn’t help but hope that he would wake up and this would
have all been one very bad dream.
Unfortunately it wasn’t a dream. It was very real. Sam felt his shirt get cut
away first and he felt Gabriel run his fingers over the fine hair on his chest.
He knew perfectly well that body hair was not allowed by Gabriel. Sam felt
Gabriel pull off his shoes and his socks. He thought about kicking Gabriel in
the head, but decided against it. He didn’t want to get Dean or his dad killed.
Sam felt Gabriel cut away his pants and boxers. He felt Gabriel pull the ruined
clothing out of the tub and he heard it being shuffled into a nearby trash bag.
Sam felt like his dignity was being stripped away. Gabriel started to run the
bathwater at a reasonable temperature but it didn’t make Sam feel any better
inside. He could feel himself breaking and as the water level rose around his
body. Sam started to cry.  
He wept silently as Gabriel touched him with a soapy wash cloth over his body.
He whispered, “No,” when Gabriel touched his private parts. He sobbed when
Gabriel washed his hair and wiped the tears from his face. He sobbed when
Gabriel shaved his body, including his privates. He broke down completely when
he felt Gabriel secure his collar back around his neck. Sam knew in that moment
he had been stripped completely of any dignity he thought he had.
Sam felt Gabriel release his wrists from the restraints as the water drained
out of the tub. He felt like he was in a daze and he wasn’t sure what to do. He
hoped Castiel would save him soon. Castiel was his only hope. Sam let Gabriel
pull him out of the tub and dry him off. He couldn't stop crying no matter how
many times Gabriel dried off his face.
Then Gabriel led him back into the bedroom. Gabriel ordered, “Lay down on your
stomach and put your hands above your head.” Sam wept but did as he was told.
He felt Gabriel tied his hands and secure them to the headboard. Then he felt
Gabriel secure his feet so that they were tied about a foot and a half apart.
Sam knew Gabriel was going to fuck him. He decided to give one last plea,
“Please don’t do this. You promised me that you wouldn’t rape me. I don’t want
this.” Sam wept a little harder as the words came out and hid his face in his
arm after he finished speaking.
He felt Gabriel run his fingertips along his spine from the top of his neck all
the way down to his tailbone. Sam felt violated by the touch and he wanted it
to stop, but he already voiced how he doesn’t want this and that didn’t change
anything. Sam heard Gabriel move his hand away and open the drawer on the
nightstand. Sam heard the distinct click of cap on a bottle of lube. Then he
felt Gabriel touch his hole.
He felt Gabriel work a lubed finger around the rim then it slowly breached him.
He cried out more in emotional pain than any real physical pain. Sam felt
himself sobbing harder. As the finger worked in and out of him, he felt like he
was dying inside. He felt like his soul was being trampled on after it
shattered.
Gabriel took his time working Sam open. Once he had three fingers inside of
Sam, he noticed that Sam still had not calmed down. He was expecting Sam to
accept it by this point. Gabriel reached his spare hand under Sam and felt his
cock. Sam was completely soft. He knew he had been rubbing Sam’s prostate as he
opened Sam up but that didn’t seem like enough to get Sam aroused.
He leaned down and kissed the side of Sam’s neck where his brand once was.
Gabriel hated that plastic surgeon for removing it. He whispered into Sam’s
ear. “It’s okay, Sam. Your Master is going to take care of you.”
Sam managed to croak out through his sobs, “You’re not my Master. I don’t want
you to do this to me.” Sam really didn’t expect Gabriel to stop. He just wanted
Gabriel to know that he was raping him. He decided that if Gabriel was going to
rape him. He was going to make this the least enjoyable experience possible for
Gabriel.
In past instances, Sam had never been completely sure if Gabriel was in fact
raping him or not. He never told Gabriel no or asked him to stop. He begged for
forgiveness when he thought he wasn’t being pleasing enough. Sam hated it but
at the same time, all he had ever known was violence associated with sex. It
was what Sam thought was supposed to happen.
Through countless hours in therapy and going to the support group for former
slaves. Sam found out how wrong he was and how manipulated he was by Gabriel.
It made him angry that he fell for it, but he still couldn’t bring himself to
blame Gabriel. Sam knew when his therapist turned the situation around and
asked how Sam would feel if what happened to him happened to someone else. Sam
knew he would be angry at the perpetrator, but when it related to himself he
just couldn’t get angry at Gabriel.
Sam heard Gabriel unbuckle and unzip his pants. He heard the unmistakable
shuffle of Gabriel’s clothes. He heard the quiet squeaking sound of lube being
added to Gabriel’s penis and all Sam could feel inside was terror. He never
wanted this to happen again especially knowing now what this was and after
expressing he didn’t want this.
Sam felt Gabriel start to ease his cock inside of him and the broken word,
“No,” fell off of Sam’s tongue on an endless loop. Inside Sam’s mind he was
wondering why this was happening to him. He wondered what he did wrong in life
to deserve this. Sam wondered if he did nothing at all and that maybe life was
just unfair. Sam searched his mind for something. Something that couldn’t be
taken away from him.
Everywhere he turned inside his mind it broke into little pieces because
Gabriel could touch him there. Gabriel could hurt him there. Nothing was sacred
for him. Gabriel controlled whether or not he could see his family, how he
looked, how he spoke, what he ate, when he slept, and when he moved. Gabriel
controlled everything. As Gabriel thrust harder into him, Sam realized Gabriel
probably controlled it all along and his freedom was just an illusion.
Sam stopped crying as he felt himself die inside. He stopped speaking. He
stopped moving and his muscles went lax. He didn’t feel like he was apart of
his own body anymore. He felt like he was watching himself from some other
point, maybe in time or somewhere else in the room, he wasn’t really sure. All
Sam knew is he didn’t feel alive anymore. Eventually, Sam felt Gabriel climax
inside of him. He didn’t respond to it. He had nothing left to feel.
++
After Gabriel finished with Sam, he left Sam tied to the bed. He was pretty
pleased with himself. He didn’t check but he was pretty sure he had just
screwed Sam senseless. Gabriel ignored Sam’s pleas to stop because he was
certain he knew what Sam really wanted and he was right.
Gabriel was fully dressed and on his second movie when he heard a knock on the
door to his quarters. Castiel was standing there with blood dried on his
clothes. Gabriel knew it was Dean’s blood. He also knew that Castiel looked
pissed and he had John Winchester with him. Gabriel could hear commotion
outside going on inside the mansion. It wasn’t the sound of torture. It was the
sound of guns and death. Gabriel wondered what was going on.
Castiel and John stepped inside Gabriel’s quarters and Gabriel let them enter.
Castiel looked around and didn’t initially see Sam. He asked with aggravation,
“Where is Sam Winchester?”
Gabriel smiled and smirked. He took a drink of his soda and stated, “You mean
my slave, Sam. He is recovering in bed. He is unavailable.”
Castiel took a step toward his brother and sneered, “Sam is not your slave, you
sick bastard. Since you have failed to notice, the little live execution
tonight started a rebellion. Lucifer and Lilith are dead. The rebels are
working on breaking into Michael and Eve’s safe room as we speak. Your guards
have held them off for you and you would know this was happening if you would
answer you cell phone.”
Gabriel crossed his arms and turned his TV to watch the security cameras. Sure
enough, Lucifer and Lilith were dead in the main hall. He could see his guards
fighting the rebels to keep them away from the corridor he shared with Castiel.
Gabriel knew they wouldn’t last forever. He knew that they were going to kill
him. Slowly Gabriel asked, “What do they want?”
Castiel rolled his eyes, “Fairness maybe? Justice? A ruling family that isn’t
insane? I don’t know.”
John had enough of this conversation. They knew where Sam was and the rebels
were going to kill Gabriel anyways. He pulled a knife out of his jacket as he
stepped forward to Gabriel. He leaned against the man as he shoved the blade up
inside of Gabriel. John felt it was Gabriel’s last breath escaped him.
Gabriel’s hand gripped John’s shoulder as his body went limp. Gabriel’s last
words were barely a whisper, “Tell him, I’m sorry.”
John dropped Gabriel’s body to the floor. Gabriel was the first human he had
ever killed. However, Gabriel was the worst monster he had ever killed. He felt
relief with knowing that his son’s tormentor was dead. Gabriel could never hurt
Sam again. John turned to Castiel and said somewhat truthfully, “Sorry for your
loss, Castiel.”  
John walked past Gabriel’s body and into Gabriel’s bedroom. He saw Sam tied to
the bed. He turned on the light and stepped closer to his youngest son. He
looked over Sam’s body and he knew what happened. John didn’t need Sam to tell
him. He noticed that Sam’s eyes looked vacant. John’s hands shook as he untied
Sam’s ankles. From this angle, John could see the slight pink tinge of blood
and body fluids on Sam’s thighs. He shook his head to will away the tears.
John untied Sam’s hands next. He lowered his son’s arms down to his sides.
Still Sam did not move or stir. Sam made absolutely no indication that he knew
his father was there. John knelt down in front of Sam’s face. He cupped the
side of Sam’s face with his hand. He could see the dried tear tracks on Sam’s
face. John felt like a failure. He should have killed Gabriel a long time ago
to spare Sam from this. Quietly John said, “Sammy, it’s okay. It is over now.”
John didn’t get a response from Sam. His son’s eyes still looked dead but he
could feel Sam’s breathing. John took off his jacket and covered Sam with it.
He gently rolled Sam over and he wrapped his arms around his son. John picked
Sam up and silently carried him out of the room. Sam was limp in his arms and
John had no idea how to make it better.
++
Castiel led them out of the mansion a back away. John was able to get Sam
loaded into his truck and Castiel sat on the other side of Sam. John didn’t
know what Castiel’s fate would be. All he knew was that the rebels were calling
for Castiel to be king. John knew that if they were successful in killing
Michael it would probably happen. Regardless of if Castiel wanted the title or
not.
However, John had more important things to worry about right now. He had to
worry about his boys. As they pulled into their apartment complex where they
left Dean. Everything was quiet. There were no riots around them. John carried
Sam up to their apartment and they opened the door to find Dean pacing back and
forth frantically.
Castiel calmly said, “Dean, you should be in bed.”
John walked past Castiel with Sam in his arms. He started to walk toward the
hallway to put Sam in his bed when he was stopped dead in his tracks by Dean.
His eldest son walked up to Sam and cupped his head that had fell back in
John’s embrace. Dean begged, “Please come back to us, Sammy.” Much like when
John tried to talk to him, Dean got no response.
John said quietly, “I am sorry, Dean. Let me get him cleaned up and into some
clothes. Maybe being in his own room will help.”
John walked down the hall and laid Sam down in bed. He went into the bathroom
and wetted a wash cloth. John cleaned up in between his son’s legs while
whispering apologies. Then he worked a pair of boxers on his son. Followed by
pajama pants and a t shirt. Then he eased a hoodie with a zipper on Sam. He
zipped it up so it sat a couple inches below his son’s neck. Then John pulled
the blankets up around his lifeless son.
John took a look at the collar Gabriel had put around Sam’s neck. For the first
time, John read the inscription on it. He never knew that for seven years of
Sam’s life; he was tagged as someone else’s property. John didn’t have the
correct wrench to remove it. So he went out to his truck and got his bolt
cutters. 
When John returned to Sam’s room he cut the collar off of Sam’s neck. He tossed
it on the floor along with the bolt cutters. Then he touched the side of Sam’s
face and whispered, “Please come back to me, Sammy.”
++
Dean decided that if he was going to be forced to rest. He could rest with his
catatonic little brother. His dad had given him the abbreviated version of what
happened. He was actually kind of angry that Gabriel died so quickly but at
least Sam was safe now.
Dean laid down on his side so he was facing Sam. The position hurt but he was
tired of laying on his belly. Sam’s eyes were open as they had been since he
came home. Dean could see Sam blink slowly, but there was no real life to Sam.
John came into the room and gently sat Sam up against his chest. He wrapped an
arm around Sam to steady him as he tried to get Sam to drink something. John
had failed the last few times and Castiel had given Sam some IV fluids just to
make sure he didn’t dehydrate. This time though, Sam actually swallowed a
couple drinks. John praised Sam, “That’s good, Sammy. You’re doing well.”
Sam moved his fingers when he heard his father’s voice. He blinked rapidly a
few times to focus on what was around him. He slowly realized his dad was
holding him which felt oddly nice. Sam reached up one his hands and grabbed
hold of his father’s arm. He whispered out brokenly, “Daddy.” Sam felt himself
breakdown again in his father’s arms. He was in his home and with his dad. Sam
hoped everything would be okay.
John held onto Sam a little tighter and sat the water down. He whispered in
Sam’s ear, “Shh Sammy, it’s okay. Daddy’s here.” Sam curled into him tighter
and he realized that must have been the right thing to say. John let Sam hold
on to him and sob. He didn’t know what else to do. He knew he had never been a
terribly supportive father but he hoped that he was doing the right thing. John
held Sam until his youngest drifted off to sleep. Then he laid Sam down so he
was facing Dean. John reasoned that at least this way when Sam woke up he would
know he wasn’t alone.
++
Sam woke up when the early morning sun was creeping through his window. He saw
Dean sleeping next to him in his bed which he thought was odd. He knew why Dean
was there though. He remembered Gabriel raping him then he just completely shut
down for a while. He remembered coming out of it with his dad holding him. Sam
felt a shiver of embarrassment when he remembered having a breakdown in his
dad’s arms.
He sat up slightly on his bed and grimaced with how sore he was. Sam knew he
would be feeling what Gabriel did to him for a while. Sam just hoped he
wouldn’t have to see Gabriel again anytime soon. He knew what Gabriel did to
him was mild compared to what he could have done. Still this last time hurt him
more than any previous time he remembered.
Sam opened the drawer to his nightstand and pulled out a blank postcard. He
flipped it over to write on the back.
“Gabriel hurt me when I asked him to stop and made it clear I didn’t want that.
I always thought it was me not speaking up that caused it to happen but I think
that maybe I was wrong. Sometimes, I miss being a naive kid.” 
***** Chapter 41 *****
Dean thought it was odd in some ways, well a lot of ways. Castiel could handle
power with a prowess he never knew Cas had inside him and truthfully, Dean
wasn’t convinced that it was something Cas truly wanted to do. He knew most
people couldn’t see it. When Castiel addressed the public his eyes were always
focused and that was all most people could see, Dean thought. But under that
Dean thought he could see Castiel’s longing just to be like everyone else. He
could see Castiel’s fear of making the wrong choice. Dean knew that Castiel
would make mistakes as king. Cas was human after all, but Dean knew if anyone
could do a good job it was Castiel.
The rebels burnt much of main palace. Lost in the fire were Castiel’s painting
from when he was kid. Dean knew the paintings were special to Castiel, but he
didn’t really know how to address it. He never kept stuff like that, with the
exception of Sam’s postcards. However, Dean knew the postcards weren’t really
his they were Sam’s.
Michael survived the attack, but Eve did not. Castiel managed to convince the
rebels not to kill Michael. Dean wasn’t entirely sure why Castiel did that. He
knew Castiel’s reasoning. Cas didn’t want to build a better empire on the blood
of his fallen brothers. He wanted to build it on a respect for human life.
Personally, Dean thought the respect for human life bit could start after
Michael was dead. Michael was a dick that not only had him tortured, but had
also tortured Sammy.
Michael was locked away in one of the nation’s prisons for supernatural crimes
because they were the most secure. Dean didn’t know what those prisons were
like. He knew his mother had lived in one for decades since Sammy was a baby.
Dean wondered if Michael would ever meet Mary and if so what he would say about
Sam or him. Dean knew his mother loved him at one point in his life. He just
wished his mother could have loved Sam too.
After order had been restored, Castiel’s first act as king was signing into the
law the Sam Act. It ended slavery and beyond that it gave all former slaves the
help they would need to live out the rest of their days. Dean knew that meant
social programs. Most of the former slaves were twitchy and barely functional
adults. The programs would allow them to get needed medical care including
mental health care. They would also never have to worry about having a place to
live.
Dean knew most of them would never aspire past where they were. Meg was a
prostitute and even though she didn’t say it. Dean was certain it had to do
with the sexual abuse she suffered as a slave. Having sex and making it good
came naturally to her. Meg’s life depended on it being good when she was a
slave, Dean reasoned.
Sam. Dean wasn’t sure what Sam’s fate would be in the end. Dean wasn’t it sure
if it was the fact that Sam was the slave Castiel defended that put Sam in a
very unwanted spotlight or if it was Michael pissing on him. Dean honestly
didn’t know. He knew it didn’t really matter what the reasoning was, Sam didn’t
like it. Sam didn’t want anyone to know he was a slave, much less the personal
slave to Gabriel Novak. Everyone knew what that meant. Everyone with half a
brain knew what went on between Gabriel and Sam.
Sam had guys fawning over him, which his little brother didn’t appreciate. Ever
since Sam’s last round with Gabriel, where Dean was not entirely sure what
happened. Sam had never specifically said. Dean knew from talking with their
dad and looking at Sam that aside from an obvious rape and raw skin around
Sam’s wrists and ankles, Sam was unharmed. Dean knew that Sam had been raped
tons of times by Gabriel and he didn’t honestly understand what made this time
different. But Sam was worse off now, if anyone touched Sam unexpectedly it
would send him into a panic attack.
Dean felt particularly helpless during the panic attacks. He didn’t know what
to say or what really to do. Sam’s eyes always looked wild. The only thing he
could do his talk gently to his brother and wait for Sam to come back to his
senses. Dean had not been successful in getting Sam to take anything for it.
The reasoning was simple, Gabriel drugged him.
Sam’s reaction to finding out about Gabriel’s death was bizarre in Dean’s
opinion, but Castiel explained that it was normal given the level of abuse Sam
suffered. Castiel told Dean it was like when a parent or sibling that had been
abusing a child dies, the child still mourns their loss. Sam had cried when he
found out about Gabriel’s death. Dean had to listen to Sam talk about how he
loved Gabriel for hours. Those hours were absolute hell for Dean because it
made him want to stab Gabriel with a fork.
One of Sam’s reasons for loving Gabriel was that Gabriel fed him. Dean wondered
many times why getting fed always came up when Sam spoke about why he loved
Gabriel. That and having a home. Dean often wondered if this was brainwashing
Gabriel did to Sam or how Sam really felt. It made Dean feel shitty sometimes.
It made him wonder if he really did that badly of job looking out for Sam
before Sam became a slave. 
However, as much as Sam cried about how he loved Gabriel. He also said that he
hated Gabriel. Dean wondered how Sam could feel both ways, but Castiel
explained that was just another part of Sam’s trauma. The saddest thing Dean
heard from his little brother was how when he was a slave; he didn’t see
himself when he looked in the mirror. Sam felt like property and Gabriel owned
that property.
As for himself, Dean was doing okay. He guessed. His back was healing up okay
even though it still hurt when he moved wrong. Dean had no idea how many
stitches he needed. All he knew was the pain pills were his friend for a few
days. He was currently sitting in the living room watching Sam read the paper
when a thought came to Dean’s mind.
Curiously he asked, “Hey Sammy, can I ask you a question?”
Sam looked up from his reading. He had been trying to distract himself. Gabriel
had been on his mind a lot lately and he felt a terrible ache inside from where
he missed his master. Quietly Sam said, “Yes Dean.”
Dean gave a contemplative look. He was second guessing the wisdom in asking Sam
this but he did anyways. Tentatively Dean asked, “The times you were tortured.
Did you ask for them to stop?” Dean regretted asking almost immediately but it
was something that had been on his mind for a long time. Michael, some of the
dick guards, and Sam had even said that Sam had to be trained to beg. Dean knew
there was a difference between begging and asking. Dean just wondered if Sam
had ever asked.
Sam’s face paled slightly and his jaw twitched. His little brother shook his
head and let his bangs fall into his eyes. He let out a slow breath and said
reluctantly, “I am guessing you mean did I beg when my back was.. damaged? No,
I didn’t ask them to stop. I screamed and cried when he hit me but I never said
anything.”
Dean shook his head and asked while cringing, “But did you ask other times? I
mean, I broke pretty quick and everyone has always made it sound like you had
the perseverance of a saint or something?”
Sam gave a small smile but Dean could tell it was forced. He rubbed his eyes
for a moment and said with embarrassment. “Yes, they broke me. It took years.
It wasn’t even Gabriel that managed to do it. It was Lucifer.” Sam paused and
pursed his lips, “I don’t think you want to know the details of that.”
Dean nodded and asked with equal embarrassment, “Do you think I am weak because
I couldn’t take as much as you?”
Dean regretted asking that because Sam tensely flattened the paper on the
table. Sam took a slow calculated breath and then asked while visibly trying to
keep his cool. “You don’t get it, do you Dean? It didn’t matter what I said or
what I thought; when I was a slave the guards, Michael, Lucifer, and Gabriel
were going to do what they wanted with me. Not begging was just me holding on
to one piece of myself they couldn’t take. I felt like my mind was my own, even
if my body wasn’t and even if my actions were not what I wanted to do.
“Dean, I woke up every day wondering if I was going to get beat, raped, or
killed. I feared it but at the same time I just accepted it as part of life.
When it happened, I just waited for it to be over. I would think about other
things a lot.”
Slowly Dean asked because he didn’t get what Sam was saying. He didn’t
understand how knowing bad things were going to happen regardless resulted in
Sam staying stubbornly silent. “But when you were raped didn’t you want them to
know you didn’t want that. I mean that would seem kind of important.”
Sam’s face became hard and angry. His composure was lost. There was anger in
Sam’s voice. It was a raw anger that Dean hadn’t heard since he was a moody
teenager. “You know what, I don’t even know why I am talking to you about this.
I never thought I had the right to ask Gabriel to stop. I was his personal
property. Asking him to stop would be like your shoes suddenly asking you not
to wear them one day.”
Sam stood up and took a couple steps toward Dean. Briefly Dean wondered if Sam
was going to hit him for being inconsiderate, but Sam just stopped. Dean
noticed Sam’s anger was wavering a little. Sam was starting to sound upset with
the way his voice cracked when he spoke. “I told him though. This last time, I
don’t know if it was because Equitas gave me the strength or what. I asked him
not to do that to me. I asked him to let me go. I said no until I finally just
realized.. I.. I..I’m sorry.”
Now Dean felt like a dick. He got up and put a gentle hand on Sam’s shoulder.
He politely said, “You have nothing to be sorry for Sam. You don’t have to
explain yourself to me. It’s okay.”
Dean then ended up with Sam crying on his shoulder which made him feel like
even more of a jerk. He did realize one thing from this conversation though. If
he had to deal with what Sam did he would have cracked like an egg. He knew
without a doubt, Sam was the stronger brother. Dean had a feeling that Castiel
and their dad knew that too.
++
Castiel hated being king. It wasn’t one thing in particular about it that he
hated. It was everything in general. Sure he ended slavery, but that didn’t
really solve anything. He still had capitalists trying to take over the land.
Capitalism is what caused the great representative republics of the past to
fall. That knowledge was the only reason why Castiel took the throne instead of
letting them mange themselves. He didn’t want his people to suffer at the hands
of greed.
Still he found that he could not please everyone or anyone really. Everyone
always wanted more and those who took nothing wanted those in need to get less.
Castiel was sick of trying to explain that the former slaves have suffered
greatly and need the nation’s help to survive. Some people wanted a time limit
on help, which Castiel couldn’t do. He knew there was no time table on healing.
Castiel had ended the public executions and Castiel had not been presented with
a good reason to execute anyone. He did not view himself as merciful by this
action. Rather it was quite the opposite. He knew that being locked in a cage
for the rest of one’s life, alone with no one to talk, and nothing but the
equivalent to gruel to eat was a worse fate than death. It was his brother’s
fate and it was a fate shared by Sam and Dean’s mother.
Castiel couldn’t help but feel like the nation would be better off ruled by a
pair, as opposed to just him. Cas was confident that if Michael and Lucifer had
not been cruel, they could have done a fine job of balancing the needs of the
many. As it was, they fell to darkness instead of letting their differences of
opinion lead them to right path for the nation. With that in mind, Castiel
asked Sam and Dean to visit him at his home. Castiel had kept his same modest
home because he liked it and he didn’t want a palace.
Dean entered Castiel’s home with a key and Sam followed nervously behind him.
Castiel smiled at them and said happily, “Hello Sam. Hello Dean.”
Dean rolled his eyes and asked playfully, “Why do you always say hello to Sammy
first?”
Castiel smiled and teased, “Sam is bigger than you and I’ve known him longer.”
Dean chuckled and teased back, “I’m the big brother so I will always be bigger
even if he is overgrown.”
Castiel smiled again and sat down. He looked between the two brothers and said
nervously, “I wanted to ask the two of you something important and it is okay
to tell me no or think about it and get back to me.”
Sam and Dean both sat down next to each other. Dean had a bad feeling about
whatever it was Castiel wanted to ask them. He knew a large portion of the
population wasn’t happy about slavery ending. Dean feared that Castiel would
want to repel the Sam Act or worse, enslave Sammy again.
Castiel rested his hands on his knees and spoke honestly, “I do not feel fit to
be king. I think a ruling pair would do the best job. A pair whose differences
balance off of each other. Two people like you. I..I wanted to ask if you both
wanted to rule jointly. I would abdicate the throne to both of you. I.. ah..
would still be a prince.”
Dean stared at Castiel blankly for a moment then he said a little dumbfounded,
“You want Sam and me to rule this country together? Why? Sam doesn’t like being
in the public eye.”
Sam spoke up with reservation. He fiddled with his hands as he spoke and asked
softly, “Is it because I was a slave?” He didn’t want to be offered something
because of what he was at Gabriel’s hands.
Castiel’s eyes got wide and he said adamantly, “No, it has nothing to do with
that. You and Dean balance each other. I think that balance could lend itself
to a great country. No one person holds all the answers.”
Sam nodded and asked slowly, “So if you want two people to rule, why don’t you
just marry Dean? You and Dean are pretty different.” Marriage seemed like a
more reasonable option to Sam. He had seen firsthand for years the cruelty
among Castiel’s brothers and he didn’t him and Dean to turn into that.
Dean raised an eyebrow and asked Sam, “Different bad or different good?”
Castiel sighed and stated, “I think our relationship as lovers would get in the
way and we would never truly be equal. I don’t want a lover’s quarrel to hurt
the nation.”
Dean gave a skeptical look and said, “Did you never fight with your brothers?”
Castiel looked at his hands and said sadly, “Yes Dean, I fought with my
brothers. You were present for one of them and Sam was present for one when he
was a slave. Both times it was a fight about protecting the two of you. My
brothers would have killed me if it suited them. I don’t think the two of you
can kill each other. That is what makes you a good match for this.”
++
Dean went to bed with a lot on his mind. He had no idea if they should take
Castiel up on his offer. Sam twitched nervously whenever he brought it up, so
Dean decided to let them both sleep on it over night before they came to a
decision. He didn’t honestly expect Sam to agree, so for Dean, it was just a
matter of getting Sam to vocalize that he didn’t want that.
Dean wasn’t really sure what Sam wanted out of life anymore aside from being
invisible. The thought of that made Dean a little sad. Sam didn’t want anything
out of life except not to be noticed. He wondered how empty Sam must feel
inside. Dean didn’t know if time would help to ease Sam’s pain. He knew Sam’s
pain would never completely go way. His little brother would always hurt inside
because of what was done to him.
He pulled out his binder of postcards and flipped to one of his favorite ones.
“Dean read to me about the Knights of the Round Table, I wish I could have an
adventure like that but I can’t. I’m unclean. When I’m bigger I’ll miss story
time with Dean.”
Dean had never been able to figure out what Sam meant by being unclean. If he
had to guess, it was either the fact that Sam was offered up in a demon deal or
the fact that they were transient growing up so most people looked down upon
them.
He didn’t know, but a strong part of Dean hoped that Sam would accept the
challenge of being king with him. It could be the adventure Sammy always
wanted.  
***** Chapter 42 *****
Sam was packing silently in his room in the early morning hours. He was
planning on leaving. Sam gained admission to law school in the west and he had
spoken with his father about moving out there. John agreed to go with him. With
Sam’s allowances from the government for being enslaved for seven years, Sam
knew he wouldn’t have to work while he went to grad school.
Part of him felt like he was running away, which in away he was. Sam wanted to
be rid of the constant reminders that he was a slave. He wanted to just not
think about it for awhile and try to live a normal life. He didn’t think he was
asking for too much. Sam knew that out west everyone would still know who he
was, but he hoped that maybe he could just blend in better over time.
Sam didn’t know what to say to Dean or what to say about Castiel’s offer. He
didn’t want to be king. He wanted a normal life. Sam didn’t want to hold the
same position as the people who hurt him. He also didn’t want to become a
target like Novaks were. Sam remembered when Gabriel got shot and that scared
him. He didn’t want the same thing to happen to him, Dean, or their dad.
As Sam folded one of his shirts to put in his bag, he heard a gruff voice from
the door, “What are you doing, Sammy?”
Sam looked up and saw Dean, who looked rightfully concerned. He put down the
shirt he was packing and looked regretfully at his brother. “Dad and I are
moving out west so I can go to grad school. I’m sorry, we should have told
you.”
Dean was angry about this being dropped on him like this. He took a couple
calming breaths and said tiredly, “Okay, when are we leaving? I would like to
give at least two weeks’ notice at my work.”
Sam sighed and fiddled with his hem on his shirt. He looked down when he spoke
sheepishly, “We weren’t planning on you coming with us. You have a future here
with Castiel. I don’t… Or at least not a future I want.”
Dean sighed and walked in Sam’s room. He sat down on the edge of Sam’s bed and
spoke carefully, “Sammy, you know that you and Dad are more important to me
than Castiel, right?”
Sam sighed and then he moved his bag so he could sit down next to Dean. He
spoke quietly into his hands, “I know, Dean, but you need to live your own
life. I know I am nowhere near okay and that is why Dad is coming with me. As
much as I don’t want to admit it, I need someone to help me but I don’t think I
need both of you.”
Dean rubbed his hands over his face a few times and said, “Sammy, my life is
where my family is and that means you and Dad. If you and Dad are moving out
west then so am I.”
Sam fiddled with his hands and spoke quietly, “I don’t want you to give up what
you have with Cas because of me.”
Dean sighed and said firmly, “I’m not. Castiel runs the place. He can come
visit me or I can come visit him.” Dean paused and asked curiously, “Are you
trying to get away from Castiel?”
Sam regretfully nodded his head yes. He whispered out, “He reminds me of them.
Castiel was standoffish around me until he found out I am your brother. Then
overnight he became my biggest defender.  Sometimes, I wonder if Castiel never
met you how my life would have been. I .. I think he would have hurt me too.”
Dean groaned and said tiredly, “Sammy, Cas said he had never tortured or killed
someone. I doubt he would hurt you.”
Sam shook his head no and then he told a story in a near monotone voice, “Early
on, before the guards beat me severely. They ordered me to kneel in Gabriel’s
living room. I did as I was told and I watched then slowly pour lye over this
slave’s body. I don’t know what the slave’s name was. She was at Gabriel
mansion before Ruby, Meg, and I arrived.
“Anyways, this woman’s skin was slowly being dissolved. She was begging for
them to stop. Then Castiel walked in the house. He took one look at her and he
ordered that they kill her. She begged Castiel for her life and all he did was
stand there. He just stared at her with that cold look he gets sometimes. A
couple of the guards stuck her head in the bucket of lye. They held her there
until the end. Cas watched the whole thing and it wasn’t a quick death.
“Once it was done, Castiel just looked at me and ordered me to clean the mess
up. I was given the right clothing to wear so I couldn’t burn myself on the
lye. The guards told Castiel they had to do that otherwise Gabriel would get
upset. The guards told Castiel the nickname they came up with for me and
Castiel laughed. He laughed. The guards called me Spoiled Fuck and Castiel
thought that was funny.
“Dean, I was fourteen years old and they thought I was fucking Gabriel. They
thought that was funny. When Gabriel did start to hurt me sexually that was one
of the things I thought about. I thought about how it was always expected of me
to do that. I thought about Castiel laughing about it.”
Dean looked at his own hands for a moment and asked quietly, “Why didn’t you
tell me this before?”
Sam turned his head to look at Dean. He spoke with confidence, “Because you are
in love with Castiel and when that happened I wasn’t a real person. I didn’t
want change your relationship with Castiel.”
Dean let out a slow breath and asked carefully, “Did Castiel ever call you
Spoiled Fuck?”
Sam looked away from Dean and whispered out, “Yes.”
++
The drive out west was quiet and Sam liked being on the open road again. It
reminded him of home in some ways. He knew he never had a physical home until
Gabriel and that stabilized everything in his life. It always felt off when he
thought about that. He couldn’t quite put his finger on why that was though.
Sam felt relief wash over him as they drove away from everything that haunted
him. He knew he was running away from his problems, but he didn’t view staying
as a better option. Sam knew that no matter where he went he would be
identified as a former slave that belonged to Gabriel. He found that Gabriel,
despite what he did to him, had a much better reputation than Michael and
Lucifer.
Some people were upset that Gabriel was killed in the rebellion. Sam knew
though that if Gabriel wasn’t killed. Gabriel would either be ruling with
Castiel or alone and he would be Gabriel’s slave forever. That thought sent a
sliver of dread through him on how easily that could have played out. Sam knew
that no one knew what really went on behind closed doors with Gabriel besides a
few select people.
The media and the rebels regarded Gabriel as fair and a good man that would
never unjustly hurt anyone. They thought he was a saint for protecting Sam and
the other slaves under his care. They never heard about the other side of
Gabriel and Sam never had the courage to speak about it.
Sam shook his mind of Gabriel. He was checking out a coffee shop not far from
the house he was renting with Dean and his dad. He was forcing himself to go
out on his own and move past his fears. It helped that Dean had convinced him
to take anti-anxiety medication. He knew it wasn’t a cure-all by any means but
it helped just enough.  Sam thought that the reason why he was okay with taking
it was because he had control over the medication, which was something he
didn’t have with Gabriel.
He was pulled from his thoughts by a familiar female voice, one he wished he
never had to hear again. “Sam?”
Sam looked up and standing in front of him was Jessica Moore. He put down the
paper he was pretending to have been reading. He took a calming breath and was
glad he took a pill before he left the house. Without it he was fairly certain
he would have had a panic attack by now. Sam pulled out his phone as he replied
to her with uncertainty, “Hi Jessica.”
She smiled warmly and Sam just wanted her to go away. She already managed to
ruin his life once and he really didn’t want to see what damage she could do
this time. Curiously she asked, “May I sit down?”
Sam repressed the urge to either bolt or roll his eyes. It’s not like he had
ever successfully stopped her from doing what she wanted to do anyways. He took
a deep breath and lied, “Sure.” Sam then looked down at his phone and texted
his dad and Dean. He asked if one of them could meet him at the coffee shop
because he was worried about having an episode. They all knew that was code for
a panic attack. Sam could feel the beginnings of fear tingling inside him. He
worked to control his breathing so it wouldn’t take over.
Jessica slipped down in the seat across from him. She looked warmly at Sam and
Sam could not figure her out. Shyly she said, “You look good, Sam. I heard
about what happened on TV. I’m sorry that happened to you.” Sam said nothing,
because what was there really to say. Her next statement was odd, “I didn’t
think your name was really Sam when we met. I thought that was just what some
Novak named you.” She smiled widely and said with admiration her voice, “So
you’re Sam Winchester. I should have just waited for you to be free before I
asked you that.”
Sam took another deep breath and said carefully, “Yes, you should have. What do
you want from me, Jessica?” He really just wanted this conversation to be over.
Jessica frowned and said nervously, “I feel bad. I feel like I caused you
hardship by trying to help. I know Gabriel was better than Michael and Lucifer,
but..”
Sam glared at her and he had finally had enough. He angrily but quietly said,
“Why does everybody say that? He was worse than them and trust me, I would
know. You have no idea what he did to me and what he did to other slaves.
Everyone acts like he some saint and he wasn’t.”
Jessica raised her eyebrows and leaned back. She put her hands up defensively
and stammered out, “I’m sorry. It was just what the media says. They said you
and the others were well cared for. They always talk about how you got to see
your family and stuff.”
Sam let out an angry huff and said with agitation, “I couldn’t see my family.I
got to see Dean because he was sleeping with Gabriel’s brother. My father
displeased Gabriel so I didn’t get to see or talk to him. Gabriel controlled
how much or how little interaction I had with Dean. He controlled what I could
and could not tell him. They took pleasure in hurting me in front of Dean, so
spare me.”
Jessica frowned again and said honestly, “I’m sorry, I had no idea.” She paused
and asked curiously, “After that day at the church where the pastor called your
brother, I didn’t see you anymore. What happened?”
Sam closed his eyes and concentrated on his breathing. He knew his silence was
probably being conceived as odd, but silence was better than a panic attack. He
carefully went through his mind focusing on first his feet then slowly working
his way up his body and he could feel his breathing even itself out. When he
finally opened his eyes, Jessica was still there. She had a worried look on her
face.
Sam looked toward the door and hoped either his dad or Dean would be here soon,
not to rescue him but just so he would know that if he did crack he wouldn’t be
alone. He shook his head and said quietly, “I got punished severely for a year.
I lost most of my privileges. I spent most of my time being chained up. I would
get punished for speaking or looking at someone the wrong way.”
Jessica gave Sam a sympathetic look and said with sincerely, “I am sorry that
happened to you.”
Sam snapped back at her, “Yeah, well it wouldn’t have happened if you would
have left me alone like I asked you too. You wanted me to have some secret love
affair with you and betray Mas.. Gabriel. “ Sam’s expression turned hard and it
felt like all of his anger and resentment about that time was being focused on
Jessica, “You caused me to start getting beat and kept on a leash. You caused
him to think I was an ungrateful piece of shit.”
Jessica spoke in a shocked tone, “You were never hit until I interfered. I
caused you to get hurt.”
Dean sat down next to Sam casually. He could hear the quiet anger in Sam’s
voice and the utter shock in the voice of the hot chick. Dean glanced at Sam
and asked in a calm brotherly tone, “How’s the coffee here, Sammy?”
Sam blinked at Dean a couple times and it took him a moment to realize that
first and most importantly Dean was here so if he did panic. He wouldn’t be
alone and secondly, Dean was trying to change the subject. Sam let out a slow
breath and said with reservation, “It isn’t bad. I haven’t found that perfect
cup yet, though.”
Dean nodded a couple times then he turned his attention to the source of Sam’s
anger. He wondered if she was a former slave. Those were the only chicks Dean
had ever seen Sam speak with relatively openly. He held out a hand and said in
his best friendly tone, “Dean Winchester.”
Jessica tentatively shook Dean’s hand and then she pulled it away. She smiled
and said, “Jessica.. Jessica Moore. Sam and I used to volunteer at Pastor Jim’s
church together.”
Dean grinned and asked lowly, “So are you the bitch that kissed him?”
Sam glanced over at Dean to look at him in horror. He did not expect Dean to
come out and say that to her. Sam hissed at his brother, “Dean.”
Dean rolled his eyes and smirked at Jessica. Then he said in a very dominant
voice, “So are you?”
Sam felt that bundle of fear roll inside of him. He knew rationally why Dean
was acting like this. His brother was overprotective to a fault. He didn’t know
what Jessica’s intentions were from this meeting. She had caused him the get
hurt in the past and he didn’t want a repeat of that situation.
Jessica sighed and said, “Yes, I am. I am sorry about that. I didn’t mean to
intrude. I usually come here on the weekends to study.”
Sam nodded and nudged Dean to move. He started to feel his medication wear off
and he knew he had to get out of this situation soon. Dean stood and Sam
followed only for his arm to be grabbed by Jessica. The unexpected touch sent
Sam spiraling over the edge. He felt his vision narrow and it felt like he
couldn’t breathe anymore. Everything felt like it was too much and he felt like
someone or something was compressing him.
Dean caught Sam when he started to panic and stopped the impeding fall. He
eased Sam back down into a sitting position. He watched carefully as Sam
struggled to control his breathing and tears streamed down his little brother’s
face. Dean knew Sam had absolutely no control over any of it, even though Sam
tried his hardest to control it.
He put a hand on Sam’s shoulder just so Sam would know he was there. Contrary
to what their dad thought, touching Sam on his shoulder or even holding him
helped to calm him down. Dean wasn’t sure why that was. He spoke softly to Sam,
“Hey Sammy, it’s okay. Just breathe deep, in and out. You’re doing so well.”
Dean heard Jessica’s worried voice behind him. “I’m so sorry, I had no idea.”
Dean turned and snapped at her. “Please just leave my brother alone.”
++
Sam returned home with Dean after that episode. He set about cleaning the
kitchen and probably baking a pie for something to do. He needed to keep his
mind busy. His classes were starting in two weeks and he was nervous about
going back to school. Sam knew he had let Gabriel steal his desire to learn for
a long time and now he felt like he was finally starting to get control of his
life again.
He knew it wasn’t easy on anyone but he appreciated the sacrifices his family
made for him. Sam didn’t like to think about where he would be without them. If
he had to guess, he would think he would be dead. Sam knew on some of his bad
days, his brother and dad had to do a lot to take care of him. On his good
days, Sam knew he could pass for a functional adult. He hoped for more good
days in his future.
As Sam started to pull out the ingredients for the pie he saw a small postcard
get pushed through the mail slot on their front door. He knew it was too early
for the mailman. Curiously, Sam went over and picked up the postcard. It had
candy on the front and Sam felt his blood run cold. He nervously flipped it
over.
“Sam,
I am sorry. I just want to get to know you. I feel a connection to you and I
don’t express it well. I am sorry that I have hurt you. I hope that we can be
friends. I promise I won’t touch you ever again without your permission.
Jessica.”
Sam looked at the postcard for a moment and then he laughed when he realized
something. Gabriel had probably set it up for Jessica to be volunteering at the
church just to see what he would do. Then he realized something that scared
him. Gabriel’s body was never recovered. It was Castiel and his father who
stated Gabriel was dead. But what if, Gabriel was somehow still alive and this
was his way of messing with him.
Sam knew it sounded crazy. Well, more than crazy but Sam knew he would have to
be careful and watch his back.  He took a deep breath to push the unpleasant
thoughts out of his head and he tossed the postcard in the trash. 
***** Chapter 43 *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
It’s been five years since Dean moved out to west with Sam and his dad. Sam
graduated law school at the top of his class. He got offered a job at a fancy
law firm that specialized in copyright laws. Sam took the job but on the
condition he only worked part-time. Dean was surprised they accepted that but
Sam was smart. Sam was able to crank out the answers and review the documents
in half the time as other lawyers. Dean was proud of Sam.
Dean and this dad decided to open their own auto repair shop. It wasn’t fancy
but it was perfect. Dean’s favorite thing to do was to restore classic cars and
sell them. He knew he wasn’t using his degree but he was enjoying life. It felt
odd to him to think about that sometimes, because he was making about the same
amount of money. Of course, Dean knew that their business didn’t have legal
fees like other companies. They had an attorney in the family.
He hadn’t seen Castiel in five years. He missed Cas and he still talked to him
on the phone sometimes. It was just, he couldn’t get over how he treated Sam.
Dean didn’t know if Castiel started to treat Sam better because Sam was his
brother or not. But the fact remained, Castiel broke rule number one of Dean
Winchester. No one messes with Sammy. Still, Castiel had gone out of his way to
make it up to Sam. Even though Sam could afford to pay for his own healthcare,
housing, and other living expenses. A large part of that was still paid for by
Castiel, just as Castiel paid for all of the other former slaves.  
Dean had some one night stands over the past five years. He found that loving
them and leaving them came with far fewer complications. He knew that most
chicks and guys liked to trace the scars on his back from where Alistair cut
him. Some of them knew how it happened. Others didn’t. Dean always thought
about making up some sort of crazy story, but the truth was the craziest story
he could think of. He always told them an abbreviated version of the truth,
“The Novaks did it.” He would say.
Sam had started dating which made Dean’s heart flip with joy and worry. He was
dating some chick named Amelia who seemed a little rough around the edges. She
was a former slave, like Sam. She became a slave when she was seventeen. Her
boyfriend at the time was two years older than her and a guard. He was executed
in front of her by Lucifer when he tried to protect her from getting beaten.
Dean was fairly certain their connection was their war stories from when they
were slaves but they seemed to get along well. Amelia was managing okay with
her trauma like Sam. She was a veterinarian because she preferred the company
of animals to humans. Dean could understand that. She spent four years of her
life being a chew toy for some of the sickest people on the planet.  The
animals she worked with couldn’t hurt her the way she had been hurt and Dean
was fairly certain that she treated those animals with more love and care than
she was given when she was a slave.
John was playing the field again too. He had gotten back together with an old
flame named Kate. Apparently, John had fathered an illegitimate child with Kate
and never knew.  Kate named the child Adam and Dean did not know how to take
having another little brother. Adam was an adult by the time they met. He was
six years younger than Sam. Ten years younger than himself. Dean thought Adam
was rather bitter about not having John in his life.
Adam wasn’t on Dean’s list of favorite people. The first thing out of Adam’s
mouth when he met Sam was an, “I expected Gabriel’s pet to be shorter.” Sam
retreated to his room without a word to Adam’s comment. Dean followed Sam to
his room and helped Sam through a panic attack. They stayed in Sam’s room the
remainder of the time their dad had Kate and Adam over. A deck of cards was
enough for them to pass the time.
As a family they had gone on a few hunts over the years. It was always simple
things when they all had time off. Nothing too dangerous and certainly nothing
demonic. Now though, they were going to have to deal with one of the demons
from their past. Castiel had informed Dean that Mary was dying inside the
prison that housed her. They were planning on executing her so the government
would not have to incur medical expenses for treating her.
Sam had asked to see her before she died. Dean didn’t really understand why,
but from Sam’s rambling. He understood that Sam wanted to meet the mother that
never loved him. Sam wanted to meet the person that thought so little of him
that she would give him to a demon. Dean didn’t understand. He wasn’t sure if
he could ever understand.
Yet here they were walking through the doors of one of the nation’s most secure
prisons. They had to meet Castiel for dinner after this little meet and greet.
Dean was more nervous about that than seeing his mother.
After they were verified as human, a guard led them down a grey hallway. Dean
could see different sigils carved into the stone surrounding them. There was no
doubt in Dean’s mind that these sigils warded off nearly everything. Some
things he recognized like devils traps, but other things he did not.
They stopped and entered and empty room. There was a large glass window in
front of them. Dean watched in silence was a blond haired woman with grey
streaks in her hair entered the room on the other side of the glass. She was
wearing handcuffs and Dean could see sigils carved into those as well. Her eyes
were a little glassy and she looked like she hadn’t been taking care of
herself. She wore a simple orange jumpsuit that looked too large for her frame.
Dean saw her look at them through the glass after the guards locked her inside
the room she was in, alone. Mary walked up to the glass and ran her fingers
over it. She gave a sad sort of longing smile as tears rolled down her face. It
was the same thing exactly the same thing Dean had seen Sam do many times. Dean
took a deep breath and said with reservation, “Hello Mary.”
Mary wiped her eyes with one of her hands but kept the other on the glass. She
looked a little sadder now. Her voice cracked when she spoke and Dean could
tell that she didn’t talk much. “They.. They said my sons were coming to see me
before I died. Are you them?”
Dean closed his eyes and said slowly, “Yes.” He couldn’t believe that Sam had
talked him into doing this.
Mary nodded and said to herself, “I thought so.” Then she looked back at Dean
and stated, “You must be Dean.” Then she looked at Sam and smiled, “And you
must be Little Sammy.”
Sam clenched his jaw and Dean was extremely grateful that Sam had taken an
anti-anxiety med before coming to this. He heard Sam state firmly, “It’s Sam.
You sold me to a demon. Why? That is all I came here for. I want to know why.”
Mary gave Sam a sympathetic look. Then she spoke like her decision was the most
reasonable one in the world. “A demon killed John. The demon offered to bring
him back in exchange for you. You weren’t even conceived yet so I agreed. When
I got pregnant with you, I just made sure I didn’t get attached because I knew
it would be coming for you. I never considered you my son.”
Dean glanced over at Sam and saw the hurt look on his baby brother’s face. He
closed his eyes and took a calming breath. He opened his eyes to face his
mother. He coldly said, “I regret the four years I considered you my mother.”
Mary frowned and traced her fingers over the glass some more. She whispered
out, “I’ll always be your mother, Dean.”
Dean rolled his eyes and said flatly, “I don’t have a mother.”
Dean then turned and walked out of the room leaving their mother watching them
exit from the other side of the glass. It was not the resolution Dean was
hoping for deep down. He was hoping that Mary would say that she loved Sam and
that it was all just one big mistake. He was hoping she would say she didn’t
know what she was agreeing too. Dean never expected the cold and harsh response
that they got. He just hoped it didn’t upset Sam too badly as he had no idea
what to say to make it better.
++
Castiel had changed over the past five years. He had kept a close eye on Dean
and Sam. He favored them for reasons he didn’t entirely understand. Sometimes
in the company of his closest ally he called them his favorite pets. He had
realized over the years that his people needed a strong handed ruler so that is
what he gave them. Castiel killed those who fought against him and those who
acted unjustly. Today was a going to be a good day for Castiel. Cas and his
ally were going to see his pets and it would be the start of something very new
for both of them.
Castiel had remodeled his family’s main palace and moved in. His ally lived on
the other side of the palace so they both had much need privacy. Castiel found
that he enjoyed filling his sexual desires with the pizza man. An underemployed
youth that would do anything for a few extra dollars was exciting to Cas. His
ally was right that letting go was so much fun.
He heard the guards talking to Dean and Sam. Cas knew his pets were here. He
made his way down to the foyer after he signaled his ally to come join them.
Warmly Castiel approached Sam and Dean as the doors to the palace closed. “Sam
and Dean, how are you doing? It had been a long time.”
Dean smiled and reached out to shake Castiel’s hand. He didn’t give a firm
handshake. It was soft because it was considered poor etiquette to firmly shake
the king’s hand. It was considered a ploy for power and even though him and Cas
had history, Dean didn’t want to push. Calmly Dean replied, “We’ve been good.
Sammy is some fancy lawyer now and I am running a repair shop with my dad.
Things are good.”
Sam gave Castiel a shy smile. Then he said with reservation. “I am very happy
with my life. Thank you, Castiel, for all the help you have given me. I have
been seeing someone lately and when we get back, I intend to ask her to marry
me.”
Castiel gave Sam a contemplative look and realized how far Sam had come. It was
growth Sam was never supposed to experience. Castiel watched as Sam’s face
began to pale. He knew his ally was walking down the stairs and there was no
doubt in Castiel’s mind Sam was looking at him. Cas cleared his throat and
looked back at his ally. Then he turned to Sam and Dean, “As you can see,
Gabriel is alive. He did a spell before the public execution that would prevent
him from being permanently harmed. He did it because he was concerned about
Michael or Lucifer hurting him.  Your father only killed him temporarily.”
Dean put his hand firmly on Sam’s arm. It was a protective move and Dean
gruffly said, “I think Sam and I should be going now. Thank you for having us
over, Castiel.” Dean turned to move out of the palace and he was stopped by the
guards.
The guards pulled Sam and Dean away from each other which caused panic to swell
in Dean’s chest. Dean watched in silence because he couldn’t figure out what
exactly to say. With a nod from Castiel the guards started to rip both of their
clothes off. It took Dean a moment to process what exactly was going on. Then
he got it, Castiel had lost his marbles.
Once he was naked, Dean was shoved to the floor on his knees. He had never been
in this position before. He looked around and saw Sam kneeling next to him,
also naked with his head lowered. There was a tremble in Sam’s shoulders, but
Sam wasn’t struggling. It was clear to Dean that Sam had been in this position
before.
Dean looked up at Castiel and Gabriel. He asked harshly, “What the Hell are you
doing? If you want to hurt me fine. Have fun but please let Sammy go. He’s
suffered enough.” Dean was expecting a lot of things to happen when he spoke.
He wasn’t expecting for Castiel to step forward and backhand him across the
face.
Dean felt the sting on his face as he looked up in horror at Castiel. He saw
Gabriel standing behind him and Gabriel practically purred out, “Very good
brother, now don’t use to much physical pain at first. You have to break down
his mind to get him to submit better.”
Castiel gave Gabriel an uneasy nod. This did not feel right, but Gabriel
assured him that this way they would both get what they always wanted and his
pets would be safe forever. Gabriel handed Castiel a metal collar and he
watched as Gabriel secured the collar around Sam’s neck. Then Castiel stepped
forward and secured a collar around Dean’s neck. The guards had to hold Dean
down while he secured it.
Cas stepped back from Dean once the collar was attached. He gave his pets a sad
look and stated, “Those collars have sigils carved in them. It will prevent
either of you from trying to hurt us or yourselves. You will both spend the
rest of your lives as our slaves. You will both be well cared for and loved so
you needn’t worry. When you are both good, we will arrange for the two of you
to have a playdate with each other. Now, I think it is time that Gabriel and I
each get reacquainted with our favorites.”
++
Sam was laying on Gabriel’s bed feeling a little dead inside. He wanted to die
but he couldn’t act on it. It was frustrating. Gabriel had raped him, again.
Sam told him no and asked for him to stop, again. He got whipped with a belt
afterwards for his statements while Gabriel raped him and for having a
relationship with Amelia. The sting of the belt didn’t matter to Sam though,
there was nothing Gabriel could really do to him. Gabriel had already taken
away everything from him and he didn’t see the point in life anymore.
Gabriel was relaxing next to Sam as he played with Sam’s hair. It was long for
guy but still too short for his tastes. He was pissed with Sam cut off his hair
when he became free. Gently Gabriel said to Sam, “I am glad to have you back at
my side. I wish you never left me. Things will get easier for you once you get
adjusted.”
Sam stared blankly at Gabriel for a moment then he whispered out, “Why did you
say I was unfit?”
Gabriel leaned down and nuzzled Sam’s neck then he sucked a hickey in the side
of it. He whispered in Sam’s ear, “I never thought that, but it was the only
acceptable reason I had. You weren’t injured enough to justify release.”
Gabriel then continued to suck and nibble on Sam’s neck. “I don’t want you to
completely loose who you are again. I think I will allow you to continue
working from home. You have lost the privilege to wear clothes for the time
being. You will refer to me as Master. I like that word on your tongue.” He
paused and asked, “What do you think about that?”
Sam opened his eyes he didn’t realized he closed. He felt a couple tears fall
from his eyes, “Thank you, Master.”
++
Castiel had Dean chained by his collar to Castiel’s bed. Dean was pissed but he
couldn’t do anything against Castiel because of the collar. Cas had not forced
himself on Dean. A fact that Dean was extremely grateful of. He doubted Sam was
as lucky. Inside, Dean felt like he was rearing up for a battle he had no way
of winning. Rationally, Dean knew the smart thing to do was to submit and then
try to find a way to work himself and Sam out of this situation.
Dean eyed Castiel as he sat back on the other side of the bed. Castiel’s voice
was solemn. “I’m sorry, it had to come to this, Dean.”
Dean let out a slow breath and said as calmly as he could, “Cas, it doesn’t
have to be like this. We can still work this out. Just let Sam and I go and we
can both start double dating you and Gabe. We call fall in love with each of
you the right way.”
Castiel shook his head no and pulled out a postcard from his jacket. His voice
was sad, “I wish it could have been that way, Dean. We were so close and then
you pulled away. This is the only way.” Then Castiel handed Dean a postcard.
Dean took it and looked at the front. It was covered in candy. He flipped it
over and read what Sam wrote. Dean could tell by the shaky handwriting and the
dried water stains on the postcard that Sam was crying when he wrote this. He
could also tell that it was dictated to Sam.
“I am Master’s property and I am grateful. My place is at his feet now and
forever. I will never miss being free because I am nothing without Master.”
Dean let a single tear fall down his face. He knew there was no getting out of
this and he was going to be a slave with Sam for the rest of their lives. Dean
knew there were no longer postcards to look forward to reading. Their lives
ended the moment Castiel and Gabriel collared them. The only thing Dean could
hope for now was a merciful death for each of them. 
Chapter End Notes
     Because of the incredible amount of bitching I received with this
     story I am giving into peer pressure. I posted an alternate somewhat
     happy ending. However, it does include major character death.
     That said, I understand those who did not like the story. Reading
     anything is a choice and if you don't like what you're reading then
     stop reading it. This story is and has always been tagged with having
     graphic descriptions of violence and rape. I apologize if you missed
     the tags that are in bold. A happy ending was never promised.
     On that note, I have been getting trolled lately. What does that
     mean? It means that I have been forced to delete some comments. I
     regret having to do that because honestly, I like the feedback. It
     helps me become a better writer and express myself creatively in a
     better manner or so I hope. There is a line between, "I don't like
     this ending. I think you should have done X or ended it at different
     point." And "You're a horrible writer." Saying you don't like the
     ending is fine. Attacking me is not fine. Attacking me is trolling
     and will get your comment deleted.
     Now that I have given more attention then ever needed to the trolls,
     I hope you all enjoy the alternate ending in the next chapter.
***** Alternate Ending *****
Chapter Summary
     This the alternate ending, I promised months ago. It took me awhile
     to put it together. Sorry for the ridiculous delay.
     It does include major character death.
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Sometimes life was difficult. It always seemed to be on a path to nowhere and
the meaning of it all seemed to be buried somewhere at the bottom of the ocean.
Most of the time, Sam felt like he was drowning. He wondered why death was
feared when those who met their end was at peace. Those who survived continued
to suffer. His own suffering never ended.
The nightmares always came. The flashbacks always haunted him. The stories of
the unbreakable people, who overcame and persevered, was not him. His story was
much different. His story was more about being shattered into nothing and
trying to glue the pieces back together only to find that washable glue was
used. He had lost count of how many times he had fell apart.
Sam did manage somehow to finish law school and get a job at a law firm. He
managed to end up on suicide watch four times in the last five years. Sam was
pretty sure that his success did not, if you could call it that, outweighed his
failures. Sam was able to provide for himself but his father still lived with
him. He no longer needed government money to have a place to live. He no longer
needed Castiel to pay to remove his scars or for his therapy. He could pay for
those things himself. Although, he was pretty sure Castiel paid for every stay
he had in the mental institution. Sam was told a charity took care of the bill
every time. He knew who that charity was.
Perhaps keeping a job and going through the motions was a statement to say that
he overcame. However, Sam couldn’t be sure. Going through the motions did not
speak of living to Sam. It spoke merely of existing. He wasn’t living. He was
pretty sure he stopped living when he was fourteen. Sam knew he was alive but
he wasn’t really living. He had no passion in his life. He saw no purpose.
Sometimes, Sam wondered why he got dealt the hand he received. Sometimes, he
wondered if his life would have been different if his mother never tried to use
him in a demon deal. Maybe he would have grown up in a real home. Maybe he
would have never been the transient second born that was handpicked to be a
slave. Maybe things would have been different. Sometimes the question of maybe
kept Sam up at night.
Sam wandered into the royal graveyard where all the fallen members of the Novak
family were buried. He wasn’t really sure why he was here exactly. He never
knew why he traveled here. He started coming here every day about a year ago.
Sometimes, he felt like he was chasing a ghost or maybe he was looking for
answers. Sam didn’t know because the question of maybe was never answered.
He weaved through the graves until he came upon the one he was looking for. Sam
laid down a single rose by the headstone. Gabriel always liked the rose gardens
at his palace. Sam never spent much time in the rose gardens but he could see
them from his window in the study. It made the palace seem almost magical to
him for some reason. Sam couldn’t really explain it.
Sam knelt down in front of the grave and cleared away some of the over brush.
The public wasn’t allowed here. No one visited the graveyard often. It was a
lonely and forgotten place. It was a place where the fallen kings, queens,
princes, and princesses found their final slumber. Sometimes, Sam wondered what
the founder of his nation would think about everything. However, he quickly let
that thought escape him.
He was just about to move away from the grave when he heard an unfamiliar
voice. The voice sounded kind but worn with time. “Hello Sam. You are much to
young to be here.”
Sam turned to look and he saw what looked like an older mix of Gabriel and
Lucifer. The man had Lucifer’s icy blue eyes. Sam had never met this man but it
wasn’t uncommon for strangers to know his name. People still remembered him
from what Michael did. Sam stammered out a less than eloquent response. “I.. I
wasn’t expecting anyone else to be here. King Castiel said I could be here.”
The man smiled fondly and knelt down next to Sam. Sam tensed slightly and
watched the man pull away more weeds from the grave. The man had a thoughtful
look on his face. He sounded like he was lost somewhere in his past when he
started to speak. “When Lucifer killed the love of my life instead of punishing
him, I punished myself and my other children. I ran away like a coward. I left
Michael and Lucifer in charge. I hid while I watched them tear the nation I
loved apart in a sea of innocent blood. I had hope for Castiel and Gabriel.
They both failed me, but I can’t really blame them. I was never much of a
father to them. I was a name and a photograph. Neither of them ever heard my
voice. I cannot blame them for my failures.”
Sam kept his eyes on the ground. He wasn’t sure what to say. He wasn’t sure
what was safe to say. He whispered out, “You are Gabriel’s father?”
The man smiled kindly, “I am Charles Novak. I’ve been going by Chuck for years
but that isn’t important. I’ve never been terribly important but countless acts
of cruelty have been done in my name. Throughout everything that happened to my
empire, I always sat back and wondered if it was the time to intervene. I
wondered so many things but in the end I did nothing. After I lost my Anna. I
was truly lost. Love can make you do silly things but it can also make you feel
alive.”
Sam stared at the name on the grave for a moment he couldn’t make it out which
was odd. Then he muttered, “I do not know what it is like to love like that.”
Chuck smiled at the grave and Sam thought his smile looked a little like
Gabriel’s smile. Chuck sounded sad when said, “Gabriel knew love. He loved you
but he was never taught how to show that love. Instead caring for that love and
watching it grow, he controlled it and held it close. So close, he lost that
love. Without you, Gabriel wasn’t really living. He was just existing in his
own anger and grief. He never had a healthy example on how to love. I think
that was why he hurt you. However, that still does not excuse his behavior.”
Sam took a deep breath and asked, “Why are you telling me this?”
Chuck smoothed the grass over the top of Gabriel’s grave. He didn’t say
anything for long moments. Then he finally said, “I seek your for forgiveness.
Contrary to anything you might think about yourself, you are not weak. It took
courage to do what you did to survive. Some may fault you for your choices but
they did not have to see life through your eyes. Someday, you will see your own
strength. Someday, you won’t have to wonder where you went wrong in life.
Someday, Sam Winchester, you will be a peace with yourself and you will finally
find your eternal peace.”
Sam gave a smile out of kindness. He said distantly, “I think my soul died a
long time ago. I do not see the good in the world. I do not see the wonder of
life. All I see is pain and suffering. I wonder what the point of all this is
if there is a point at all. I wonder when I will finally get to find my peace.”
Chuck had a gleam in his eyes when he said, “I watch children grow. I watched
the waves over the ocean. I watched the sunset after a thunderstorm. I watched
plants grow. I watched the old and young die. I watched everything and
somewhere in there I saw my Anna in you. However, I found the real wonder of
life from reflecting on myself in the mirror.
“Children, men, women, and the elderly worship me like I am some sort of God,
but I am not. I am just a man. A foolish man, at that. It made me wonder what
they saw in me. What they saw in my face that made them want to follow me. For
years, I couldn’t see what they saw. I still can’t say I see it, but I think I
understand. Everyone wants to follow someone. They all want someone with all
the answers. For better or for worse, they thought that person was me. I found
wonder in realizing that the idea of me is more powerful than who I really am.
That is why I stay hidden so I can let the idea of me live on. I see you in him
sometimes.”
Sam thought about that for a moment. Then he asked, “Why not correct the idea
of you to stop the suffering?”
Chuck shrugged and looked up at the sky. He stated, “If the idea of me fades, a
new idol will be born. That idol could be better or worse. I do not know. I
think if given the chance they would have followed you, but any chance of that
was cut short. Castiel has stabilized the country. I am one of his advisors but
he doesn’t know I am his father. There isn’t an ounce of me inside Castiel. He
is his mother maybe that is what makes him a good man.”
The man stood and patted the headstone. He said quietly, “I wish I could have
called you son.” Then he walked away.
++
Castiel yelled out into the courtyard, “Claire! Come back here.” He watched a
young blonde girl run toward him. He scooped her up in his arms. He spun his
daughter around for a moment and listened to her giggle as if she didn’t have a
care in the world. He couldn’t remember a time in his life when he felt like
this. Castiel loved that spark of life in Claire. It warmed his heart.
He kissed the side of his daughter’s head then he put her back down so she
could play. Castiel turned to see Emilia. He wrapped his arms around her and
asked quietly, “How are you?”
Emilia nodded and asked hesitantly, “I am fine, Master. Tomorrow is my twenty-
first birthday. Will I be able to see Claire after that day?”
Castiel turned his attention back to his daughter. She was chasing a bug and it
made him smile. He longed for something inside of him when he saw her that he
couldn’t quite place. Initially, Castiel had ended slavery for Sam. Only that
didn’t work out, he had to reenact it so he could produce an heir. He wasn’t
attracted to women and he didn’t want the mother to have any claim on the
child.
Castiel told himself that he treated the slaves better than his brothers but he
didn’t know if that was true or not. Less slaves were selected and they were
allowed to go home to their families twice per year. He had never killed one or
beat them like his brothers did. However, he did take away their freedom. He
reduced them to something unimaginable.
He told himself that he was better than his brothers because he never raped
someone. He never beat or raped Emilia. Castiel used artificial insemination to
impregnate Emilia. He never asked her consent but he cherished what he
received.
Castiel found that Emilia wanted to feel loved by him but that was the
beautiful lie. He didn’t love her romantically like she wanted. He wouldn’t ask
for her hand in marriage. Castiel intended to let her go tomorrow so she could
pursue her life without the burden of their daughter. Castiel faked his love
for her after Claire was born. It made the illusion seem that much more real.
Sometimes, he closed his eyes he could remember what it was like to be in love.
It was a feeling that was almost forgotten to him now.
Castiel knew Claire would be queen one day. Her ideas and view of the world had
to be molded by him and not by her mother. He opened his eyes and let the
illusion end. He said simply, “No, she will no longer see you.”
++
Dean wandered the halls of the supernatural prison. He started working as guard
here some time ago. He still remembered his mother’s love and he wanted to see
if that person was still alive. Whatever it was he loved in his mother had
disappeared or maybe it was life that caused that person to change. Dean didn’t
know.
He sat down at a table with a board game and waited for a blonde haired woman
with greying hair to sit down across from him. Dean setup the pieces carefully.
He heard the lady speak, “Dean, tell me about Little Sammy. He was such a
beautiful baby.”
Dean focused on the pieces for a few moments then he said, “Mom, why do you
always ask about him?” He always tried not to think about Sam. It was easier
that way. 
The woman looked off to the corner of the room. She sounded a little lost, “I
didn’t know what I was trading. I never wanted to hurt either of my sons. He
can hate me but I just want to know he is okay.”
Dean rolled the dice and watched the numbers fall. He didn’t know how to tell
his mother this. “Sammy killed himself about a year ago. They say that he walks
the graveyard where all the other Novaks are buried. He wasn’t a Novak but he
was buried there. I know I should salt and burn his grave but I can’t bring
myself to do it.”
Mary let a tear fall down her face and she asked, “Why?”
Dean swallowed and stated, “Because he had nothing left to live for. Dad passed
and I never had strong enough glue to keep him together. I lost. I lost my baby
brother and he was my best friend.” 
Chapter End Notes
     Flaming comments will be deleted and generally I don't even read them
     all the way through.
     So flamers please go do something more constructive with your time
     like perhaps posting your own stories. One thing I noticed is those
     that complain have never actually posted anything. Or maybe if you're
     not comfortable posting your own work but okay with criticizing
     others, you could feed the homeless or some other worthwhile
     activity.
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
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