Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/8705656. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage, Rape/Non-Con Fandom: Supernatural_RPF Character: Christian_Kane Additional Tags: Romance, Angst, First_Time, Alternate_Universe, Drama, Abuse, Hurt/ Comfort Collections: Sinful_Desire Stats: Published: 2007-10-18 Completed: 2008-01-20 Chapters: 8/8 Words: 22001 ****** The light at the end of the Never Ending Tunnel ****** by CatherineNicholas [archived by sinfuldesire_archivist] Summary Jared's parents died in a car accident when he was 8 and after that he moved in with his abusive uncle. When he is 16 they move to a new town and everything changes when he meets a guy named Jensen. Will Jensen Be able to save him? Notes Note from the Sinful Desire archivists: this story was originally archived at Sinful-Desire.org. To preserve the archive, we began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2016. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on Sinful_Desire_collection_profile. ***** Chapter 1 ***** An 8 year old Jared is sitting patiently with his teacher Mrs. Carly, waiting for his parents to pick him up from school, when she says; “So do you have any ideas where your parents could be, Jared? Because I really need to get going”.   “I don’t know, they should be here, they're never late”, Jared replies looking up to his teacher with scared and soulful eyes. Looking towards his teacher for answers. “Well don’t worry sweetie I'm sure they just got caught up somewhere. I will get the office to give their cell phone a call, ok hun'? Just wait here a sec”, Mrs. Carly kindly says while quickly ducking out of the room.   When she enters the room 10 minuets later, it is with tears in her downcast eyes, barely able to look towards Jared. At her return Jared smiles at her warmly and asks so innocently when his mummy and daddy will get there. She chokes on a sob, crouches down in front of him and says; “Jared, there’s something you need to know. Although I would give my life to not have to tell you this sweetie”. Jared looks into her eyes, as though they hold all the answers of the world.   She continues talking between sobs, “Jared, honey. . . Your parents have been in a terrible car accident. They didn’t make it sweetie”. Jared just continues to stare at her, but now with panicky eyes, and after a few seconds barely able to hold down a sob softly replies; “Why are you lying to me Mrs. Carly? My mummy promised me she would be here to pick me up. And mummy never breaks her promises”. “I'm so sorry Jared, but I'm not lying”, she says while reaching her hand out to rest on his shoulder. Jared immediately flinches back from her contact, and with tears beginning to fall he replies between clenched teeth; “Stop lying to me, they will be here soon". And after a beat he screams "THEY ARE NOT DEAD!”. And with that Jared pushes past Mrs. Carly and leaves her sitting on the floor now crying hysterically and unable to move from the overwhelming grief.   When he gets out of the classroom, he starts running as fast as he can and continues running through the school corridors until he trips. And then he just lays there while reality begins to sink in and all he can do is cry. All he want to do is cry. Jared don't want to move nor speak. He thinks if he just continue to lay there, then maybe time will stay still and he can pretend his parents are still alive. He can pretend this is just all a bad dream.   ****************************************************? One year later Jared is lying in his bed awake, unable to sleep because of the noise his - most likely drunk - uncle is making down stairs. All he can do is think about the moment that his life had gone from happy families with white picket fences, to living in complete and utter fear. He is afraid of a lot of things like most other nine year olds. He is afraid of spiders, ghosts, being left alone and most importantly death. Although there is only one thing that really terrifies him, and that's his uncle.   Once his parents died he was sent to live with his uncle Jack, and by now Jared is sure that his uncle has something against him. The first three months where extremely hard on both of them. Jack had lost his brother and Jared had lost his parents. During this time Jared's uncle had been very supportive of him. Always made sure that Jared was doing ok and had everything he needed. But around the 4th month Jack had begun to drink more and more. Jared didn't like this because when Jack was drunk, he didn't seem like his uncle anymore. He had still been the tall, strong built, dark haired and brown eyed man that he had always known. But when drunk, Jack was much more vicious and like to physically take his anger out on Jared.   The first time this had happened Jared had been sitting in the lounge room watching TV. He knew his uncle had been drinking but he hadn't taken much notice of it. It all went so fast that Jared hadn't known what had happened. But the next thing he remembered was that he had been on the floor nursing a black eye while his uncle stood screaming at him that it was all his fault. Screaming that if Jared hadn't asked his mum to pick him up from school that day, then his parents wouldn't have gotten into the accident, and they would still be there with them.   After that incident it began to happen more frequently. It would always start with his uncle getting so drunk he could barely see straight and then Jared would end up on the floor crying with fresh cuts and bruises to match his emotional pain. His uncle always blamed it on Jared and said if he'd just behaved then he wouldn't have to be punished. He made Jared feel like that everything that was going wrong in their lives where Jared's fault, and that he deserved what he got.   As Jared continues thinking about all that has happened in the past year, he doesn't hear his uncle stumbling up the stairs. Although when his bedroom door is violently shoved open, he is quickly pulled from his thoughts and fearfully stares wide eyed at his uncle standing in his door way glaring at him. There is something different in the way that Jack is staring at him. There is something other then the usual glow of anger in his eyes. Jared doesn't know what to do, so he just quietly asks "are there something wrong uncle Jack?". Jack replies with a dry humourless laugh and slowly moves closer towards Jared’s bed. Jared pulls his quilt tighter around him and begins to shake, knowing he is about to get beaten. His uncle notices this and just smiles before saying "That’s right, you be scared you little bitch. Cause don’t you worry, your going to be my bitch really soon".   After that Jack throws a quick and hard punch to Jared’s stomach while chanting his usual words of hate; "Come on you little bitch, this is all your fault. Your so filthy. Your so worthless and that’s all you'll ever be Jared". Once Jack is finished with his assault to Jared’s stomach he climbs on top of Jared, straddles his thighs and begins to rub his thumb over Jared’s cheek, leaning down to whisper into his ear; "Don’t worry Jared, I know what you want. I'm gonna make you feel so good that you will be screaming my name". Jared doesn't understand what he is talking about, although he can just feel it in his bones that it's nothing good.   The next thing Jared knows is that his uncle is undressing himself still straddling Jared, and at this Jared begins to really panic. Although Jared doesn't exactly understand what his uncle is going to do, he knows that it's going to be something bad. Jack grabs his own dick and waves it in right in front of Jared's face. "Come on you little slut, you know you want this in your mouth. Well don't worry, uncle jack will take good care of you". At this point Jared begins to cry, screams and tries everything he can to push his uncle away from him. But Jack holds him still and simply replies Jared's actions with a smirk and a "come on Jared. Take it like the bitch you really are". Then he shoves his cock down Jared's throat and begins to thrust. Jared can barely breath and the pain is unbearable. He doesn't know what to do now Jack holds him in his firm grip, so all Jared does is to lay there and try to accept his punishment.   As his uncle begins to pull out of Jared's mouth, Jared feels relived until Jack says; "Oh don't worry bitch, this ain't over yet. I said I would take care of you, and so that's what I'm gonna do". At this Jack begins to pull down Jared's pyjama pants and underwear briefs. Jared is protesting wildly. Screaming and squirming. Everything he can think of to try and stop his punishment. Although all of that just encourages Jack even more. He grips Jared's dick tightly and when Jared yells out in pain it just cause a smile on Jack's face. Just when Jared thinks it can't get any worse he finds out he is terrible wrong. Right after Jack has turned Jared around so he is laying on his stomach, he can feel something hard push between his ass cheeks. As soon as he feels the intrusion he screams louder than he had thought was possible, over the excruciating pain. He has never felt anything so terrible in his whole life. He feels like he is going to throw up, but all he can do is scream. He is terrified and just prays to God, that this will soon be over. As soon as Jack has thrust all the way into Jared, it feels as though Jared is about to pass out from the pain. And after several more thrusts that's exactly what happens.   TBC ***** 7 Years Later ***** Seven Years Later   Jared had just finished unpacking the last of his belongings into his new small and cramped room. Two days ago, he and his uncle had moved from their old house in Texas to California. Jared didn't mind the move as much as most 16 yr olds who would be leaving behind their friends, since a friend is something Jared has never had. Its not like he isn’t capable of getting friends. Its just that having friends is something his uncle calls a luxury. Something that is unneeded and, more importantly, something he doesn’t deserve. And since he's been home schooled for the past five years, its been very hard to make friends without his uncle noticing.   Jared still receives his regular punishment; it hasn’t stopped since it began. This is one of the reasons he was being home schooled. His uncle had been worried that Jared would either tell someone, or they would start asking questions about his regular bruising.   The only reason they moved to California is that his uncle received a job there that he couldn’t reject. Although, his uncle only found out that the California laws for home schooling are different to those of Texas, AFTER he accepted the job. Therefore, starting tomorrow morning, Jared is officially a student at California State Public High School.   Just thinking about going back to school made him extremely anxious because he hadn’t been to one in five years. Its not that he's worried he isn’t smart enough, since he always does well on the tests the school board supplies for his home schooling. Its just that he's worried some one will find out how bad he is, and what he did to his mum and dad. He knows he's bad. Jack tells him every single day. He tells him what a filthy slut he is and that he doesn’t deserve to live because of what he did to his parents. He makes sure that Jared knows what he is by hammering the thoughts into him while he regularly rapes him.   --------------------------------------   As Jared is neatly laying out his clothing for the next day, he hears the front door slam shut and knows that Jack is home. As soon as he enters the small one story house he called out, "Jared, you little slut, get your ass in here NOW."   Jared’s head immediately snapped up in fear and he quickly ran to where his uncle was standing in the kitchen.   "Yes uncle Jack?"   Jack just stared at him. "So, Jared, you excited about starting school tomorrow?"   He is so shocked from his uncles kind words and instantly knows there must be something behind them.   "Yeah, I'm looking forward to it."   His uncle just smiled, "Good, because you better remember what I told you about not saying anything to anyone about the little games we play together. Do you understand?"   Jared, unable to form any coherent words, swallowed and sharply nodded his head.   "I SAID DO YOU UNDERSTAND YOU LITTLE SLUT?"   "Y-y-yes Uncle Jack," Jared quickly stuttered. "I promise."   He lets out a relieved sigh, "Excellent. Well, now that’s all sorted out, would you like to play a game with me Jared?"   Jared began to panic, knowing he was still too sore from Jack raping him two days ago. He doesn't think he'll be able to handle the pain right now.   "Would I be able to just go to bed since I have a big day at school tomorrow and need to sleep," Jared asked hesitantly.   Jared quickly regretted saying anything as soon as Jack slapped him hard across the face and stated between gritted teeth, "You will play when I say you play, you little slut. And don’t even bother pretending like you don’t want it."   Jared quickly nodded his head in agreement, knowing that if he disagreed then he would be in a lot more trouble then he is already.   Jack then smiled and added, "Ahh, now that’s the good boy I know. Now get your ass on my bed and don’t even try complaining."   Doing exactly what he was told, Jared walked slowly with his head hung low towards his uncle's bedroom. He knew he was in for a rough night, he just hoped it was over soon.   ------------------------------------------------------   Jared awoke early the next morning hoping he could get to school early enough to avoid his uncle. As soon as he sat up he winced from the pain in his back side. He slowly walked towards the mirror and was relieved to find there was no bruises from where Jack had violently slapped him last night.   "The last thing I need is people asking questions," he said quietly to himself, letting out an exhausted sigh.   Jared quickly dressed in to his favourite pair of jeans and black AC-DC top that he had picked out last night, brushed his teeth, and decided to skip breakfast. With one last look in the mirror to check his hair he's out the door in no time, hoping to God that his first day goes fine.   ---------------------------------------------   When he arrived at school he went straight to the student foyer to pick up his time table and find his classes. Once the first bell rang, he headed off to find his home room. Because he had trouble finding the right room,everyone had already arrived before him. When he entered, everyone stopped talking and turned straight towards him. He felt extremely awkward knowing everyone’s eyes were on him, judging and scrutinizing him.   When the teacher noticed him standing there she squealed in delight, ushered him in, and said aloud to the class, "Every body this is our new student Jared Padalecki. I would like you all to welcome him kindly and be sure to help him out when he needs it."   Jared just smiled shyly at her and quietly said his thanks as she showed him to his seat.   Once he was seated, everyone just seemed to go back to their own conversations, and no longer payed any attention to him.   Except for one boy.   Glancing to his left, Jared saw the light brown haired, green eyed boy staring at him like he was the most interesting thing around.   Jared looked back down at his desk as a light blush quickly spread across his cheeks, and pretended he hadn't noticed the boy looking at him. Jared had never been interested in guys before but he cant help but notice this boys pure beauty.   When the bell rings he quickly grabbed his bag and practically ran out of class. He doesn't want to know why the mysterious boy was staring at him, mostly because he's too scared of the answer. He walked quickly to his locker and busied himself placing his new books inside.   As he closed his locker door, he's startled to see the same boy from earlier smiling warmly at him. After Jared didn't say anything, the mysterious boy said "Hi, Jared right? My name's Jensen. And, uhh, I was just thinking that you might need someone to show you around and thought I’d offer a hand since I’ve got nothing better to do."   Jared just stared at him, not really caring to make any friends since he had told himself he wasn‘t worth anyone’s friendship. "Uhh you have classes to go to right? Im pretty sure that’s something to do, so uhh thanks, but no thanks. Im doing fine on my own". With that said he began to walk in the other direction, hoping he didn’t hurt that Jensen boys feelings.   Jensen just stood there, wide eyed and stunned, as Jared walked away.   Jensen doesn’t know why, but for some reason he just felt as though he had to get to know this boy. There was just something in his eyes that told Jensen he could use a friend right now. He somehow reminded him of a lost puppy.   Besides all of that, he was kind of cute.   So Jensen decided to himself that he was not going to give up. And after Jared’s remark it just made him feel more determined to find out what it is about this new kid Jared.   ---------------   When lunch finally rolled around, Jensen headed straight to the cafeteria. As soon as he got there he spotted Jared sitting alone at a small table in the back corner, just staring at his plate and poking it with his fork. Poor boy, Jensen thought. Looks like he didn't know to bring his own food on Mondays when the Cafeteria served their meat loaf surprise that Jensen suspected was recycled.   Jensen turned towards his friend Chris and said, "Hey, man, I’ll be right back. Im just gonna go say hey to the new kid."   Chris looked over to where Jensen was looking at Jared and scoffed a laugh.   "Who? That antisocial, shaggy haired freak in the back corner?"   Jensen was automatically on the defensive. "Hey, man, back off alright? You don’t even know the kid. Besides I heard he hasn't been to school in like 4 or 5 years . . . home schooling or something. So cut him a break alright?"   When Jensen gave him a warning look Chris puts his hands up in mock surrender and said, "Alright, Jen, sorry man I didn't mean to offend or nothing." With a wink and smart assed smile he added, "Just didn’t think he was your type."   Jensen let out a long annoyed sigh, "Jesus man, is that all you ever think about? I mean Im happy youre supportive of me being gay and all, but you don’t need to comment about it every five minutes."   While looking towards the table full of all the senior girls Chris disinterestedly added, "Yeah, whatever dude. Anyways, you go chat up the kid, I’ll just be over there talking to all the smoking ladies."   As Chris walked away, Jensen couldn't help but laugh at his best mate. He could be a pain in the ass at times, but he had always been there for him when it counted.   With that said Jensen began to walk to where Jared sat staring at the wall,looking as though his mind was somewhere else completely.   Jensen reaches out his hand and tapped Jared on the shoulder.   As soon as Jared felt the contact he started and pulled from his terrifying thoughts of last night.   Jensen pulled his hand back quickly when he saw Jared jump and take in a sharp breath.     He quickly said, "Hey man, sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you or nothing, I just wanted to know if you wanted some company."   Jared quickly calmed himself down and casually replied, "Nah don’t worry about it man, you just startled me is all. And yeah i guess i could do with some company."   Jared wanted to reject Jensen’s offer but he didn't want to seem to rude. Besides, he thought if he had someone to talk to it might take his mind of things for a little while.   Jensen smiled when Jared accepted his offer of company and quickly slid into the seat next to him. "So are you a Texas boy?"   "Uhh, yeah, actually. I just moved from there three days ago. I never knew I had such a noticable accent."   "Nah, Im just good at picking that type of stuff up I guess. So how come you moved up here anyway?"   "Well my, uhh, uncle got a new job up here, so well, here I am."   "Your uncle? How come you don’t live with either of your parents?"   As soon as Jensen noticed Jared swallow and look down at the table and try to stutter out an answer, Jensen wished he hadn't brought it up, so he quickly cut him off, "Im, uhh, sorry man, I don’t mean to pry. You don’t have to tell me anything, I was just wondering is all."   Jared smiled at the concern he could sense in Jensen’s voice. He didn’t know what, but something about it just made him feel warm inside. Something about Jensen just made him want to spill all of his dirty little secrets that he had kept inside for so long. But he knew he couldn't, so he just replied, "Nah don’t worry about it man. They, uhh, passed away when i was young, a accident and well yeah."   Jared sorrowfully looked down at the table. He couldn't help but wonder why he even told him that much.   Jensen looked towards Jared and couldn't help but feel sorry for the poor boy. There was something inside him that just made him immediately feel protective of Jared. So he just laid a hand on Jared’s shoulder comfortingly and quietly said, "Im sorry man, no kid deserves that."   Jared smiled slightly, glanced up, and saw Jensen looking at him with concern.   For a few short moments both boys just stared into each others eyes, completely oblivious to everything else going on around them. Jared was the first to break contact and look back down at the table. Jensen's gut twisted at the look of pure pain and hurt that he saw in Jared’s eyes. He doesn't know the boy well. Although one thing is for sure, he wants to be the one to wipe that look of sorrow from Jared’s eyes. ***** Chapter 3 ***** Chapter 3   When the last bell rang, signaling the end of the day, Jared felt like he was going to throw up. He had been having such a great time with his new friend Jen that the thought of having to return to his excuse of a home made him feel sick to his stomach.   For the past two hours Jared and Jensen had been in Science class talking like there was no tomorrow. They were driving the teacher up the wall but just couldn’t stop the flow of conversation. Eventually, around the half hour mark, they were sent outside because the teacher couldn’t handle the constant chatter.   Not that they minded of course, because this just gave them a chance to not only talk more, but about more personal matters. Jensen had told Jared a lot about himself, including his true sexuality. Not that it made a difference to Jared since he was the type of person to accept people no matter what. When Jensen had asked about Jared’s sexual life, he admitted to having absolutely no idea since he’d never really had a relationship with anyone before. When the conversation headed in the direction of his home life, he’d quickly changed the subject. Not because he didn’t trust Jensen, but because he wasn’t ready to share something that personal with anyone yet.   After only knowing each other for only one day it felt as though they had been friends for years, Jared thought to himself. He didn’t know what it was about this guy, but just been around him made him feel as though he could forget about home for a little while. Although deep inside he knew that the cuts and bruises would heal, he also recognized the fact that the emotional trauma that his uncle had caused would haunt him forever, no matter where he went, no matter how hard he tried to forget.   While Jared grabbed his text books out of his locker that he needed for his homework, he suddenly remembered Jacks rules, and all the punishments he received when he disobeyed those rules. It was like a gory horror film running though his head 24/7 ,and no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t seem to switch it off. He suddenly felt panic rise deep within him. All he could do was stand there contemplating what was to come if his actions today were discovered. He knew that if his uncle knew he had become friends with someone, especially a guy, then there would be hell to pay. The reality of knowing he was soon going to be pulled from his safe haven at school, and returned to his own personnel living hell, hit him hard.   While still standing in the same place staring blankly into his locker, he was startled when he felt a hand land on his shoulder. Upon instinct he pushed the person away and screamed, "Get your hands off of me!"   By the time Jared came back to himself he realized it was Jensen.   Shocked, Jared didn’t know what to do. So he just stood there staring wide eyed at him.   As soon as he saw Jensen begin to approach him, Jared automatically took a step back. He knows that when he’s bad, he gets punished, and he assumes that Jensen must want to punish him in one way or another for what he’s done.   Jensen could see the fear grow in Jared’s eyes so he cautiously said, “Hey, Jay, come on man, you don’t have to back away from me. I’m not gonna bite. I’m not mad, ok?”   Jared continued to stare, trying to figure out why Jensen hasn’t gotten mad at him yet. He doesn’t understand, he hurt him, so why isn’t he mad?   Jensen could tell Jared was confused, although he wasn’t the only one. Jensen had never seen anyone look so scared in his life. He didn’t know what to do. He knew there must be something that caused Jared to act like this, he just couldn’t seem to figure out what it was.   He slowly tried to approach Jared again. “Jay, man, what’s going on? Your scaring me. Please..” He paused and took a deep breath before continuing, “Just let me in. I know you haven’t known me for long but . . . God, Jay, I can already tell something is bothering you. I cant help if you don’t let me in.”   As a tear slowly dripped down Jared’s cheek he said, “I appreciate it ,Jensen, but there’s nothing you can do to help me, alright? I think it would be better for both of us if you just stayed away. Its nothing personal, I just really cant deal with all of this right now. I’m sorry.”   With that said, Jared took one last longing look towards his first real friend in years, and turned away.   Jensen didn’t know what to do. He knew there had be something seriously wrong to make Jared act like that. They had been having a great time today, everything seemed fine. He was really worried about Jared and wanted nothing more then to run after him, but he knew that it wouldn’t do any good. He seemed too fragile right now, and pushing it would just make it worse. But Jensen was too worried to do absolutely nothing, so he pulled out the little piece of paper that Jared cautiously handed him earlier that day, and made a mental note to check up on him later.   --------------------------   When Jared arrived home that day he ran straight towards his room, not bothering to find out whether or not his uncle was home. He didn’t know why telling Jensen they couldn’t be friends hurt so much. He he’s had to do it to plenty of other people before, but it had never affected him like this. When he walked away from Jensen, he felt like he was leaving a part of himself behind and he wondered if it would always be like this.   If he would always be so isolated and alone.   Jared didn’t want to think about any of this right now, he just wanted to sleep and forget it all. So he crawled into his warm and comfy bed and wrapped his quilt around him as tightly as he could, trying to block out the rest of the world. As he drifted of to sleep, the last thing he saw was the hurt look on Jensen face.   ------------------------   The first thing Jared noticed when he woke up was that it was now dark outside.   The second was that his uncle was sitting at the bottom of his bed staring at him with the look that always meant he was in a whole lot of trouble.   “I-is something wrong Uncle Jack?” Jared asked, fearing the answer.     “Well, why don’t you tell me Jared?” With a wicked smile he added “So, tell me, how was you first day at school?”   Jared immediately broke out into a light sweat, fearing that his uncle would be able to see through his lie.   “It wasn’t too bad, just kinda boring.” Yeah, that sounded believable.   “So, how about you tell me this,” switching his face from playful to serious, “did you make any new friends?”   “Well, no, of course not.”   Oh God, please let him believe me.   “I know you said to keep to myself so that’s just what I did Uncle Jack.”   What happened next caught Jared right of guard. His uncle walked straight towards him and swung his fist at full force, connecting with Jared upper left cheek bone.   Jared let out a loud scream from the pain, which was quickly cut off as his uncle dragged him out of bed by his throat.   Jared was terrified. He had no idea what was going on. He was trying to figure out why his uncle snapped at him out of no where.   “You’re a lying bitch you know that Jared? I know for a fucking FACT that you’re lying to me!”   Still confused ,Jared replied “I honestly don’t understand what you’re talking about.”   Jack huffed a laugh. Letting go of Jared, he walked towards his old night stand cramped next to the door, picked up Jared’s cell phone, and threw it at him.   Jared was confused, he was sure he left it in the charger in the kitchen-Oh, shit.   Jack smiled when he saw realization dawn on Jared’s face. “It was ringing earlier on. Why don’t you check your voice mail, little bitch, cause I did.”   With shaking hands Jared dialed his voice mail number and slowly brought the phone up to his ear fearing what he would hear.   He recognized the voice straight away.   “Hey Jay, its me, Jen. Well, um, I just wanted to know what happened today, I was really worried about you. Things were going great between us today, well, at least   I thought they were. Just . . . Please, man, if something is wrong , just tell me. Jay, I promise I wont judge you or get mad, I just want to help. I mean everyone needs a friend, right? Well, anyways, I got to go. I‘ll see you at school tomorrow, ok? I just . . . hope you’re ok man, you looked really scared today. Bye Jay.” Jared hung up and watched the phone slide out of his hand and drop to the floor. He didn’t know what to do. His uncle just stood there staring fiercely at him. He had no where to run, no where to hide. All he could do is stand there and wait for his uncle to make a move.   He was startled out of his thoughts when his uncle said between clenched teeth, “On the bed . . . . NOW.”   TBC. . . ***** Chapter 4 ***** Chapter 4   The next morning Jared awakes to the familiar feeling of excruciating pain from the previous nights punishment. Gathering all of his strength he gets out of bed and make his way towards his small dirty mirror, wincing with every painstaking step he takes.     He is shocked with the sight that greets him. His upper left cheek is badly bruised a dark purple color, he has a split lip and around his neck he has dark bruises which if looked at more closely resemble fingers.     He can’t bare to look at himself any longer, it just keeps on bringing back the memories of the pain he had to endure the night before. His uncle would never usually mark him in places where others would be able to notice. Although last night Jack was beyond furious because Jared had disobeyed him and then lied about it even after been asked, so Jack had lost control.     Jared knew he deserved what he had received last night. It was his fault for not doing what he was told. He just wish that the evidence from last night wasn’t visible and on show for anyone who wants to look. This is meant to be a secret that he has to suffer through alone. After what he did to his parents, he knows he doesn’t deserve anyone’s pity. And one thing he knows for sure is that he is definitely not worthy of Jensen’s friendship, he is just not good enough for him.     With these thoughts running through Jared’s head he hurries to get ready for school, hoping to be gone before his uncle wakes up. He knows that if Jack sees him in the condition he is in now then he will not be allowed to go to school. He doesn’t particularly want to have to face everyone at school, but he knows if he stays home then he will be left with Jack, which he right now doesn’t think he can handle.     Before walking out of the door Jared zips his jacket up all the way to hide any evidence of the bruising on his neck. He just hopes that he’ll be able to avoid Jensen, and most importantly avoid the questions.     --------------------------------     When Jensen gets to school the first he wants to do is to go and find Jared. He knows that he may seem kind of creepy since he has only known the boy for one day and is already so attached, but he just can't seem to help it. When they were hanging out yesterday afternoon, he could just feel this really strong connection between the two of them. Thought that isn't the only reason; he hates to admit it, but he thinks he kinda has a bit of a crush on Jared. Well okay to be honest, it's more then just a ‘bit’ of a crush.     So when Jensen spots Jared in the hall he cant help but grin, although as soon as he notices Jared's bruised face and cut lip, it immediately turns into a concerned frown as he hurries towards him.     As soon as Jared sees Jensen walking towards him Jared pretends he doesn’t see him and begins to walk quickly in the opposite direction. He so badly wants to see Jensen but knows that it will cause to much drama with his appearance at the moment.     When Jensen sees Jared trying to make his escape he calls out his name and hurries after him, knowing that there is no way he is going to let Jared pretend that nothing is wrong, when he now has physical proof.     When Jensen finally catches up with Jared he spins him around and in a stern non argumental voice states; “We need to talk”.     “Sorry, but there’s nothing to talk about”, Jared replies and once again tries to walk away.     Jensen pulls him back and this time says more forcefully; “No Jared, don’t think you can pretend like nothing is wrong, it looks as though you have just gone ten rounds with a brick wall, so don’t say there is nothing to talk about, cause you damn well know there is”.     Trying to avoid the subject Jared fakes a laugh and states in a smart ass tone; “A bit dramatic don’t you think Jen? God, you trying to turn this into a chick flick moment or something?”     Jensen's beginning to get annoyed, so in an exhausted tone he replies; “Jared, can you please just stop avoiding this, you know that if you don’t then I'm never going to let it go”. Rubbing at his eyes he sighs and adds in a desperate voice; “I mean, I was worried about you yesterday man, and then you turn up to school today looking like this! I just... Just tell me how you expect me to ignore this”.     Jared hadn't realized how concerned Jensen actually was until now. Although he still doesn’t understand why. Why would someone even care? Jared doesn’t deserve to be of anyones concern, and he especially doesn’t deserve Jensen’s - No matter how safe it may make him feel. To just be in Jensen’s presence actually makes him feel safe. Jared just doesn’t know how to make Jensen see that he doesn’t need to worry about him. That there are other things way more important than him to worry about.     Jared doesn’t reply to Jensen’s question, he just continues staring at the floor thinking maybe if he stares hard enough then it will swallow him whole. Thought he really wants to talk to someone, he always has. Although he knows that they just won't understand. They will pity and comfort him and he doesn’t want that, he doesn’t deserve that.     Jensen continues to stare at Jared expectantly. He can tell that he is beginning to get through to him. Jensen gently places his hand on Jared’s shoulder comfortingly and when Jared meet's his gaze, Jensen calmly says; “Come with me Jay. Forget about classes for a lil' while, let's just go somewhere and talk, ok?”     Jared doesn’t know what to say since he definitely wasn’t expecting Jensen to say that. He had thought Jensen would have given up and moved on by now. Jared isn’t sure if he should go with Jensen and he's too scared he will say something he shouldn’t, although he doesn’t think he would be capable to return to his class's at the moment either. So after a few moments of silence Jared nods his head and with a sigh replies; “Yeah ok, I‘ll come. But I'm not promising you anything”.     Jensen is so relieved that he finally got somewhere and all he has to do now is not to stuff it up. So Jensen gently places his hand on Jared’s back and leads him back outside the school.     ------------------------------     When Jared and Jensen finally are seated comfortably on the couch in Jensen’s bedroom, Jared ask; “So uh, what did you tell your mum anyway? Like it would have had to be a good lie for her to be fine with you skipping a day of school with someone else”.     “I didn’t lie to her", Jensen answers. "I just told her that there was some really important stuff I needed to sort out with a friend, that I couldn’t do at school”.     Looking down and picking at the hem of his t-shirt Jared replies quietly; “You didn’t have to do this, you know. There’s nothing going on with me that you need to worry about anyway. Your probably just wasting your time”.     Jensen feels as though a knife has just pierced his heart. He doesn’t understand how an amazing person like Jared can think so low of him self.     “Look at me Jay!”     Jared slowly lifts his head and his eyes are met with Jensen’s concerned and loving gaze. “You seriously have to stop doing this to your self Jay. I just don’t get why you put your self down all the time. Your an amazing guy, and I don’t understand why you can't see that... 'Cause I know one thing for sure... I do".     Jared quickly looks back down, not sure if he can handle all of the emotions he can feel running through him. He has never felt this way before and he’s not even sure what it is. But as soon as Jensen moves closer so their thighs are touching, and gently cups Jared's jaw and turns his face back towards him, there's no mistaking the feelings that Jared feels running through him like a drug.     Jensen looks deep into Jared’s eyes and continues to hold his jaw so he won't look away. “Jay, I mean it when I say your amazing, so please never doubt it. I don’t know who has made you think this way about your self, but whatever they have said, they were so wrong. Your more than anyone could ever ask for... Your beautiful Jay”.     Jared listened to every single one of Jensen’s words and couldn’t help the tear that slowly slides down his cheek. But just as he thought this moment couldn’t be any more perfect, Jensen moves his hand to the side of Jared’s face, thumb rubbing over his bruised cheek. Jared closes his eyes against the soothing touch as Jensen moves closer and gently places his lips to Jared’s in a gentle kiss.     Jared has never been touched in such a way. Never been made to feel as though someone else actually cares. The new and unexpected feelings running through him are so overwhelming that Jared brakes the kiss and looks back down not sure what to do with himself.     “You ok Jay?”, Jensen asks as he wipes away the tear on Jared’s cheek.     “I just don’t understand Jen... Why do you care so much? Why are you still here?”     Jensen doesn't know how to reply to such a question and thinks it's quite obvious. "Why wouldn’t I want to stay?"; he asks himself.     “I'm still here Jared, because you’re a great guy and I really like you. And I care because I know someone is hurting you. Not only physically but also emotionally. You don’t deserve that Jared and I don’t want you to deal with it alone. You shouldn’t have to deal with it”.     “Yes I should”, Jared replies quietly.     “What are you talking about Jay? Nobody deserves to be treated like shit, but especially not you”.     “Well those other people probably didn’t kill there parents!" Jared begins to stand up to try to get away from the pain this conversation is causing him, although Jensen wont have it. He quickly stands and grabs Jared by the wrist, successfully pulling him back to him.     Jensen is confused with Jared's last statement; “What are you talking about Jared? I thought you said your parents died in an accident”.     “Yeah they did. A car accident actually”.     “Well then how the hell could it be your fault?”Jensen is beginning to get frustrated.     Jared takes a deep breath trying to calm himself. He doesn’t want to say it, but he knows he can't just stop now that he’s started; “Because they died on the way to picking me up from school”. And with a broken sob he adds; “I asked them to... if I hadn't they’d still be alive”. Jared begins feels week and falls when his legs buckles under him. Jensen's isn't quick enough, so Jared falls to the floor and continues to sob just like that time he had just found out that his parents had died.     Jensen is shocked with Jared's answer. He just doesn't get how someone can blame them selves for something so horrible, that has absolutely nothing to do with them. He immediately begins to feel sick and is so lost in his own world, that he doesn't even notice when Jared starts to collapse on the floor.     He quickly crouches down besides Jared and pulls him in to his arms. He doesn’t know how or what he is going to fix this. Jared has obviously been carrying around the pointless burden of his parents death for so long. So Jensen does all he can do; He wraps his arms around Jared as he rubs soothing circles on his back while whispering to him; “Shhh, it's ok Jay, I'm here. Just let it all out alright? It's all going to be ok. I'm going to be here no matter what. I promise you Jay... I promise.”     While Jensen continues to offer his comfort, Jared falls asleep to the sweet soothing words Jensen continues to mutter. And as Jared falls into the deep soothing darkness, he just knows that no matter what happens, he’s not going to let go of the only good thing he has ever had... Jensen. ***** Chapter 5 ***** Author's notes: Thanks to all those people who have left reviews, i really appreciate it. =============================================================================== Chapter 5   As Jared awakened, he slowly became aware of his surroundings and realized that he was lying in Jensen’s warm and safe embrace. He had never felt so comfortable and at peace before, and he didn’t want to move. Just the knowledge that he had someone watching over him for once, was something he hasn't felt since his parents were alive.   When Jensen felt Jared squirm in his arms, he smiled, realizing that Jared had finally woken up. He felt so content, and wanted nothing more than to stay there forever with Jared safe in his arms. But deep inside, he knew that he couldn’t since there were still so many things they needed to talk to about.   Gently nudging Jared, he said softly, “You awake yet sleepy head?”   Once again closing his eyes and snuggling deeper into Jensen’s chest Jared replied, “Uh uh, I’m comfy, and you’re warm. Don’t wanna move yet.”   Jensen couldn’t help but smile at how absolutely adorable Jared looked right then. He knew that there was no way that he was going to be able to pry him away, and decided he would be happier if they had this conversation with Jared safe in his arms anyway.   He doesn’t’t know how he is going to get it out of Jared, but he knows that he has to. He can’t believe that someone would want to hurt him. He has known the boy for no more than two days and he can already tell that Jay is not the type of guy to try and get into trouble.   While he continued to sit, leaning against the bed with Jared warm and safe in his arms, he tried to think of a way to ask him about the bruising; in the end, deciding that he might as well come straight out with it.   Rubbing his thumb soothingly against Jared’s back he brought his other hand up to brush away the hair in his eyes as he quietly asked, “Hey . . .Jay, I know your tired and you don’t want to talk about this but, well, I really need to know. So could we just, you know, talk for a lil while? Or, you know, you can talk if you want. I don’t even have to say anything, I can just listen. But I can’t help you at all if you don’t tell me Jay.”   Jared truly did want to tell him what’s been going on, but he knew that he can’t. He doesn’t want to lose Jensen. He is the first real friend that he’s had in such a long time, and he knows that if he tells him what’s really going on then Jensen will be disgusted with him. He will look at him how everyone else does; as if he means nothing, and doesn’t deserve to live when his parents had to die.   Jensen can feel Jared begin to shake and knows that he must be terrified. Just the thought of whoever did this to him makes him feel sick. He doesn’t want Jared to feel scared to talk to him. He knows that he might not be able to do anything to help him, but he knows one thing for sure, he’s going to do everything in his power to ‘try’.   Taking a deep breath he tried again, “Please Jay, just talk to me. I promise I won’t judge you. I just want to be there for you. I know you’re scared, but you don’t have to be that way with me. I’ll keep you safe Jay. You can trust me, I promise you."   Jensen can feel Jared’s tears soak through his shirt as Jared buries his face deeper into his chest trying to block out the rest of the world. Jensen does all he can do and squeezes him tighter resting his chin on top of his head, knowing that this must be really hard for Jared.   Just when Jensen thought he wasn’t going to get anywhere he heard Jared’s muffled reply, “You can’t keep me safe Jen. Nobody can.”   “Well I can try, cant I? All you have to do is tell me who did this to you.”   “It’s not that easy. And even if I do tell you, it isn‘t gonna change anything.”   Huffing out an exhausted breath Jensen asked, “Well, then, what do you want me to do? Am I supposed to just sit here knowing that someone’s hurting you? Because, I’m sorry Jay, but I cant do that. It’s just not me.”   “It really isn’t as bad as it looks Jen. My cheek only looks like this cause it’s a lil swollen, and it’s only a split lip, nothing to stress about. So you should just stop worrying about me, because I’m fine.”   Jared knows that’s not the truth. He hasn’t been fine in a long time. He feels like crap and knows he’s always going to feel like this. Not to mention the part where he decided to leave Jensen in the dark about the horrible strangulation bruising around his neck. It hurts like hell, but he knows that if he were to tell him about it then it would only make matters worse, and cause Jensen to stress ten times more.   "You know that is complete bullshit Jay, you are NOT fine. I’m not just going to stop stressing about this because you say you’re 'fine' when I know damn well that you’re not. You seriously need to start thinking more of yourself. If someone beat you up then you don’t have to keep in the dark about it man. I swear, I won’t think differently of you, Jay, no matter what happened. You've just gotta learn to trust me. I’m here right now because I care. Not just about what’s happening to you, but Jay, I care about YOU. And whether you like it or not, I’m not letting this go until you tell me what the hell happened to you.”   While Jensen was saying all of this to him, Jared had slowly lifted his head from Jensen’s chest and looked up to meet his gaze with red and watery eyes. He didn't know what it was he was looking for when he searched Jensen’s gaze, maybe it was doubt. He wanted to see if Jensen actually meant everything he was saying, or if it was just a lie like everything else in his life. When Jensen held his gaze and continued to stare directly into his eyes, he realized that there was nothing there besides love, comfort and honesty. He could see the genuine concern staring back at him even if he couldn't understand why such a loving and caring person was so interested with him. He drove him crazy trying to figure out how he could make him feel like the rest of the world had fallen away, leaving only him and Jensen.   As a tear slowly trailed its way down Jared’s cheek, Jensen brought his hand up to wipe away the trace of sorrow and fear that he knew Jared had been holding within for too long. He’s not thinking about the evident bruising, but the torment Jared had been causing him self over the past seven years. The guilt that he’s had to carry everyday of his life since that tragic accident, the thought that it was he who caused the death of the two people in his life that he’d never wish harm upon.   With his arm still tucked protectively around Jared’s back and his hand placed tenderly on Jared’s jaw, caressing the soft, smooth and tear damp skin of his cheek, Jensen quietly said, “Jay, I don’t understand why you can’t just tell me. I promise I’ll never tell anyone so no one will know that you’ve told besides the two of us.”   Breaking eye contact, Jared rested his head back on Jensen’s chest and replied so quietly that Jensen almost didn’t hear, “He will find out, he always finds out.”   Eye brows knit together in confusion Jensen asked, “Who will find out? You gotta be a lil more specific Jay, cause you’re confusing me.”   Realizing that he’d let something slip Jared tried to cover it up quickly, “Uhh, nah, its nothing. I was just, you know, mumbling to myself, just forget it.”   Knowing that was a lie, Jensen looking down towards Jared, “Jay you don’t just say someth . . . . WHAT THE FUCK?”   Flinching at Jensen’s unexpected outburst Jared looked back up at Jensen with a mixture of confusion and fear on his face.   Jensen closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm him self down before he opened them once again, fixed sternly on Jared.   “Where else are you hurt Jared? And don’t even try to lie because I’m not stupid.”   Jared could feel the fear beginning to grow in the pit of his stomach. He knows that he’s hurt in a lot of other place, but none that are visible. He doesn’t know where Jensen’s sudden outburst came from, so he decides his best bet is to play it cool.   “W-w-what are you talking about?”   Reaching down to unzip the top of Jared’s jacket where he saw a glimpse of a bruise he replied, “This is what Im talki . . . Fuck Jay, your neck is fucking purple! Seriously, what the fuck is going on?”   Not knowing what to do Jared quickly stood up and moved away from Jensen, trying to hide what his uncle had caused. Shaking slightly he zipped up the jacket while looking away from Jensen, flinching when his hand rubbed up against the large bruise. He didn’t want Jensen to see because he knew that if he did, then he would pity and comfort him, not realizing that Jared deserved the punishment he received.   When Jared began to move towards the door, in an effort to make his escape from the confrontation he knew was coming, Jensen quickly scrambled to his feet and grabbed Jared by the wrist.   Jensen doesn’t know how to react to what he just saw. He knows the bruising was obviously caused by trying to strangle Jared. He just had no idea that what was happening to Jared was that serious. He had thought it was just a bit of a punch up from a guy that didn’t like the new kid at school. Although, punch ups don’t usually include strangling someone to the point where it left marks like that.   He wants to scream at Jared for not telling him how serious this thing actually was, but one look into those beautiful hazel eyes, so full of fear, changes his mind. Loosening his hold on Jared’s arm he gently led him back over to the bed, placing Jared on the edge while he crouched in front of him.   Jared has no idea what to do. When Jensen pulled him away from the door, he suddenly knew that Jensen wouldn’t stop until found out everything. He’d love to be able to tell him but knew there was no way that he’d understand. Jensen has never seen what people can really be like if they are pushed. He has never seen the ugly side of life. Jared doesn’t want to dirty him with his life. Jensen was still a teenager and Jared wants him to be able to live it with innocence and without all the torment Jared has had to suffer through.   Having finally calmed down, Jensen once again slowly brought his hand up and pulled down the zipper to reveal the ugly purple and black bruising covering most of Jared’s throat. Jared couldn’t stop himself from flinching when he saw Jensen pulling down his zipper. A voice in his head was telling him that he should be stopping Jensen and getting out of there, but when he’s around Jensen he feels so safe and loved, as if he actually matters, and it’s that feeling that keeps him from moving away.   Once Jensen was able to see the dark bruising up close that sick feeling returned to his stomach. Placing his hand on Jared’s jaw, he turned his face back towards him so he could get the message across loud and clear. Waiting until Jared met his gaze, Jensen the said in a calm and caring voice, “Jay you have gotta tell me what happened This is even more serious then I thought. These bruising are really bad, we’ve gotta get them looked at.”   Eyes widening in fear at Jensen’s advice of medical attention he quickly jerked away, then stuttered out, “No, please Jen, y-you can do that. You promised me you would keep this a secret. You can’t make me see anyone.”   Moving onto the side of the bed to sit closely next to Jared, he placed a reassuring arm around his waist.   “I made a promise, Jay, and I’m not going to break it. I want you to get it checked out but I’m not going to force you. I said you could trust me and I meant that. Now all you’ve gotta do is believe it.”   Turning his head to face, Jared said quietly, “It would only make things worse if I saw someone Jen. I know you’re only trying to help, but seeing someone won’t make a difference.”   Tightening his hold on Jared, Jensen asked, “Well then tell me what will Jared. Tell me what will make a difference. Cause right now I’m out of ideas. I mean, I don’t even know what happened let alone how to help you.”   Laying his head on Jensen’s shoulder and breathing in his comforting scent he whispered, “You don’t have to do anything.”   Looking down at Jared resting against his shoulder and feeling the comforting warmth that spread through him, he brought his head down and placeds a chaste kiss to the top of his head.   “I know I don’t have to do anything Jared. But the thing is . . . I ‘want’ to. I want to help you get through whatever it is you’re going through. I want to bash the person who laid there hands on you. You didn’t deserve to be hurt, let alone like this. And the thing you don’t deserve the most is to have to go through this alone. Whatever it is, I will be there. Plus you have your uncle who can look aft. . .” Jensen cut himself off, feeling Jared’s lean body stiffen in his arms and his sharp intake of air, wondering what he said wrong he asks “Hey . . . you alright? What’s wrong Jay?”   Jared didn’t mean to react at the mention of his uncle, but whenever he even thinks about him, let alone hears someone else mention him, he feels cold, empty, and scared. So when Jensen brought up his name, he felt as though he was no longer here and safe with Jensen, but back where he truly belonged; with his uncle, where being safe had never existed, only the feeling of fear.   Jensen quickly replayed the last conversation in his head, trying to pinpoint what he might have said to make Jared all of a sudden look as though he had seen a ghost.   He finally remembers the last line he said to Jared and feels as though he is going to throw up. He can’t believe he has been so stupid and naïve. The more he thinks about it the more everything seems to fall into place. Why Jared is so afraid to tell Jensen anything and why this person has such over him. He doesn’t know how he didn’t see it before.   He doesn’t say anything to Jared yet, just continues to go over the thought in his head. Every second that passes by, every second he is left thinking about this, just makes him feel even sicker to his stomach. How could his uncle even think about hitting him? What the fuck made him think he had the right to put his hands on him? How long could have this been going on without anyone knowing? Every question he has goes over and over in his head without being answered. He can barely handle thinking about this; he doesn’t even want to acknowledge the thought that Jared has had to live with it. He finally understands why Jared has such low self esteem and wonders if it was his uncle who put the thought into his head that he caused his parents death.   He doesn’t know how much time has passed when he asked Jared in a stern voice, raw from anger and tears, “So how long has your uncle been doing this to you?”   Jared looked up at Jensen, shocked and shaking with fear, wondering how the hell he had figured it out. He begins to hope that he didn’t hear him correctly. If Jensen actually figured out what was going on then Jared would never be able to look him in the eyes again. Every time that he did would just be a reminder that Jensen knew how dirty he was, and why he even deserves to get punished in the first place.   In a shaky voice he asked, “W - what do you mean Jen? What’s any of this have to do with my, umm . . . uncle?”   Continuing to look down at Jared with worry and concern and his mind set on getting an answer he said, “Well that’s what I’d like to know Jared. What does your uncle have to do with all of this?”   Jared can feel Jensen’s gaze burning a hole into him, judging him, disgusted after finally discovering what type of person Jared really is. He knew that Jensen had figured out what’s going on, but Jared was not yet ready to admit it. “I dunno, what the hell you’re talking about Jen?”   Scrubbing a hand over his face, Jensen sighed and said in an exhausted tone “Please, don’t lie to me Jay. I’m not stupid, ok? I figured out what’s going on. I know that it was your uncle who hurt you. I wanna know why Jay. Why did your own flesh and blood, your own guardian, do something like this to you? Cause I know for a fact that you didn’t deserve it.”   Feeling tired and defeated, Jared gave up any attempt at denying it. Jensen wasn’t stupid and he also wasn’t going to let this go, no matter how hard Jared wished he would. He decided it was time to just tell the truth.   “You don’t know that Jen. You don’t know what I have done. I did something bad and I’m getting what I deserve.”   Turning his whole body so he was looking directly at Jared he said, “How the HELL could you say you deserve that Jared? He literally strangled you! YOUR UNCLE, Jay. Don’t you get that? Your parents trusted him enough to give him guardianship of you, and look what he’s done. So how can you just sit there and say that you deserve this? Nobody deserves that type of treatment, no matter what they may or may not have done.”   Jared doesn’t want Jensen to get anymore worked up, and he knows disagreeing with him will do so. Looking down at his lap where his hands are twisting together, he said anxiously, “Uhh, yeah, ok. Jen. I’m sorry, I was wrong.”   Closely examining him, Jensen can see right through the lie. Ducking his head in front of Jared’s face to get his point across he said, “Well how about you say that again. Except this time Jay, why don’t you actually try and mean it.”   “Well, how do you expect me to mean it when I don’t even believe it?” Jared desperately replied.   “Then at least tell me WHY you don’t believe it. Why don’t you tell me WHY you think you deserve this. Cause, Jay, I just don’t get it. Nothing you could have done would make you deserve this . . . nobody deserves this type of treatment Jay . . . nobody.”   “You know why I deserve this Jen. I already told you.”   Jensen began to feel frustrated. Not with Jared, but with whoever put this thought into his head. Raising his voice slightly he asked incredulously, “WHAT? That you killed your parents?   When Jared doesn’t say anything and continued to stare down at his hands with a blank look on his face Jensen tried again, “Jay, it’s not true. None of that is true. I already told you this. IT ISN’T YOUR FAULT, none of this is your fault. You were just a kid, there is nothing you could have done to save them. It was a CAR crash, Jared, and I don’t care what the hell your uncle has been telling you all these years, because you had nothing to do with it. They could have died anywhere; on the way to the store, work, dinner, ANYWHERE. Jay, just cause you asked them to pick you up from school doesn’t mean you’re to blame.”   Jared had never thought of it that way. He’s always just seen it the way his uncle told it. Jack said that it was his fault; he even punished him for it. So, he just assumed that Jack was right. It never even occurred to him that maybe it was just an accident. Looking up towards Jensen with a small smile on his face he whispers brokenly “Thanks, Jensen.”   “Don’t say thanks to me Jay. I didn’t do anything. All I did was tell you the truth. Now all you gotta do is learn how to believe it.”   Nodding, Jared turned fully so he was facing Jensen head on. He felt something warm in the pit of his stomach when he stared straight into Jensen’s eyes and saw the concern, worry, and something else he hadn’t yet figured out staring right back at him.   As Jensen continued to sit there and look at Jared, he could feel the love and admiration he had for him grow. He still doesn’t understand why, when around him, he felt weak and couldn’t seem to think straight. He knows that he’s got a crush on Jared, he just didn’t know that it was this serious. All he wants to do is steal Jared away from the rest of the world and keep him safely locked up where he never has to worry about his uncle ever again.   Jared wants to say something. He wants to ask Jensen how he was able to make him feel this way. He’s never even had a crush before, let alone on a guy. He didn’t even know if he was gay. But here he is, lost in a world of oceanic green eyes and sinfully gorgeous lips. He has never actually craved someone’s touch before, because all he has ever received is the painful and poisonous touch of his uncle, but sitting here, staring at the only person left on this world that actually cares, all he wants to do is curl up with him and feel those soft pink lips on his own.   Jensen can feel his breath coming quicker. He wets his suddenly dry lips as he lowers his gaze to Jared’s gorgeous pink lips just begging to be kissed.   Jared blushed and looked down shyly with a slight smile on his face when he noticed Jensen staring at his lips with pure lust in his eyes. He looks back up and swallowed, his throat suddenly feeling dry as Jensen placed his hand on his cheek. Closing his eyes, he leaned into the tender touch.   “Do you trust me Jay?” Jensen asked quietly while gently caressing Jared’s bruised cheek with his thumb.   Looking up quickly at the unexpected question Jared stared into Jensen’s eyes as he suddenly realized that he didn’t even have to give it any thought. He doesn’t know why, but for some reason he knows he can trust Jensen. Although he hasn’t told him about what his uncle actually does to him, and he doesn’t think he ever will; not because he doesn’t trust Jensen, he’s just too afraid he will scare him away.   Placing his hand over Jensen’s where it lay on his face Jared smiled slightly as he sincerely whispered, “Yeah, Jen. I trust you.”   With his hand still gently caressing Jared’s face he gently lifted it so they were face to face when Jensen asked hopefully, “So you will let me help you?”   The smile disappeared but Jared continued to hold Jensen’s gaze   “Well you can try, but I don’t think your go-”, he gets cut off with a large yawn and continues “going to have much luck.”   Lightly laughing Jensen said, “Well, we will just have to see about that now wont we? And are you feeling ok Jay?” He asked with more concern in his voice.   “Uhh, yeah, I’m just really tired. Big day I guess.”   With a smile tugging at the side of his lips Jensen said, “Yeah, I get what you mean. I’m pretty beat myself, even though we have only been sitting around the whole time.”   Smiling widely showing of his dimples Jared said, “I guess this whole conversation has just taken a lot out of us, you know, with all the girly chick flick moments.”   Laughing and smiling along with Jared, Jensen replied “I guess your right, Jarradeena. And, just for the record, I wanna see those pearly whites and adorable dimples more often alright Jay?”   Smiling even wider as he started to lightly blush he replied shyly, “Well as long as you’re around I will.”   “Well you don’t have to worry about that. There’s no way I’m going anywhere anytime soon.” Nodding his head in mock disapproval he continued, “according to my friend Chris I’m like a bloody leach.”   Yawning loudly Jensen said, “Anyway, I feel like I’m gonna be dead to the world soon so do you wanna, umm, lie down and have a nap or something? Its only 12: 30, so we’ve got a lot of time.”   Rubbing his eyes Jared replied, “Yeah, I think that’d be a good idea, but, umm, could I get a drink please? My throat is killing me.”   Jensen frowned and looked down feeling a little queasy thinking about the reason for his sore throat, but quickly hid it.   “Sure thing, Jay, you can lie down under the covers if you want. I’ll be back with your drink in just a sec.”   Nodding his agreement Jared pulled off his shoes and pads up to the top of the bed, pulling down the covers, and shivering as he slides under the cold smooth sheets of Jensen’s soft queen size bed.   As soon as his head hits the pillow he feels drifting off, but the need for water desperately overpowers his need for sleep. So, he laid there waiting for Jensen to return, and thought about how everything seemed so different now then it did just yesterday. Yesterday, he had no hope, no will to live. But today, Jensen has restored some of that hope, and given him the comfort which he hasn’t felt in so long.   When Jensen walked back into the room, he finds Jared curled up under the covers looking as though he’s asleep. Jensen continued to stand there in the door way just watching Jared’s beautiful and peaceful face. He’s never seen Jared look so relaxed before.   He’s knocked out of his thoughts when Jared cracks open an eye and said, “You can either stand there staring at me all day or come over here and give me my drink.”   Laughing Jensen said, “Looks like someone’s a lil grump. So maybe I’ll just stand here and drink it all, how about that huh Jay?”   Jensen was completely unprepared for Jared’s lethal weapon, the puppy dog eyes. Jared just sat there helplessly with what Jensen thought to be the most adorable pout he had ever seen in his life. As soon as it was pulled on him, he immediately groaned and moved towards the bed as Jared grinned triumphantly.   Jensen sat on the edge of the bed next to Jared and handed him the glass of water. Jared gulped it down greedily as soon as it was handed to him and sighed as the cool water slid down his throat, refreshing the burning from his injuries.   Jared handed the glass back to him. “Thanks, Jen, I really needed that.”   Setting aside the glass and climbing into the other side of the bed Jensen turned towards Jared and said, “No problem Jay, anytime.”   Jared smiled back but just continued to lay there trying to decide whether or not Jensen would want to cuddle up with him. He was shocked with his own thoughts since he never would have even thought of wanting to be that close to someone after what his uncle had done to him. He really wanted to crawl up close to him right now but decided he better not doing it since Jensen probably wouldn’t want to be that close to him right now anyway. He’s scared that he might somehow dirty Jensen’s innocence and purity.   Jensen can tell something’s wrong with Jared at the moment. Today, whenever Jay would talk about something upsetting, he’d get a certain haunted look in his eyes. And as Jensen laid there staring at him, he could see the same look dancing through that beautiful hazel gaze now. So without even thinking about it he reached out and pulled Jared close.   As soon as Jared sees Jensen reach for him he can’t help but smile and crawls over to him, feeling as though everything seems to be falling into place. He lies in Jensen’s arms with his head over his chest and listened to his steady heartbeat as he wrapped his arm over Jensen’s torso and rests his hand on his hip. He smiled against his firm but yet comfy chest feeling as though that’s where he’s always belonged and said quietly, “Thank you Jen,” not even really sure what he’s thanking him for, maybe just the fact that he’s there and that he cares.   Jensen kissed Jared’s head in reply as he soothingly ran his fingers through his soft mop of hair. “Try and get some sleep Jay, I’ll be here for you when you wake up. You’re safe here, I promise.”   Jared smiled against his chest and lifted his head up to look at Jensen. “Remember when I said I didn’t know if I was gay or not?”   Confused with Jared’s random question, he looked at him quizzically and cautiously said, “Uhh, yeah, but what’s that have to do anything.”   Smiling more and laying his head back down placing a kiss to Jensen’s chest he SAID, “Well, umm, after today . . . I’m pretty sure I’m gay.”   Laughing a little, Jensen is about to reply before he heard Jared’s breathing even out and realized he was out like a light. Smiling to himself, Jensen whispered. “Me too, Jay. Ohh God, me too,” before he falls into the deep comforting darkness of sleep.   TBC ***** Chapter 6 ***** Author's notes: Sorry for the lonh wait. I promise to update again later this week. =============================================================================== Chapter 6   Waking up with a smile on his face Jensen continues to look down at Jared still fast asleep. Gently removing himself from Jared’s hold around his waist he stands up out of bed and stretches out all of the kinks. With his arms still in the air and yawning he looks down towards the clock on his bedside table; "Hmm 4:00, we slept in for quiet a while", he thinks to him self.   “HOLY SHIT” he yells suddenly realizing what this means. He was meant to make sure Jared got home at 3:00 when he usually would be home from school.   Slowly opening his eyes Jared looks towards Jensen taking in his panicked state. Wondering what's going on he asks “Hey, is everything okay Jen?”   Looking towards Jared Jensen replies hesitantly; “Listen, Jay. 'I'm uh.... really REALLY sorry. I should have set the alarm clock or something. I don’t want you to get into trouble because of me”.   Still half asleep Jared rubs at his eyes trying to understand what it is that Jensen’s going on about. What does he think he’s done that’s so terrible it’d get him in trouble. “What are you going on about Jen? Seriously, I just woke up, you gotta be a lil' more clear”.   Not able to meet Jared’s eyes Jensen looks down at the carpet and answers guilty; “I'm so sorry Jared. We slept in too late and you were meant to be home an hour and a half ago. I know I said if you'd come with me today nothing would happen. Just... I really didn’t mean for the day to end like this”.   As the words finally sink in Jared feels as though he is going to throw up. Quickly jumping from the bed he's suddenly hit by a wave of vertigo. He has to grab onto the bedside table just to stop him self from falling over. Taking a deep breath Jared tries to calm down and compose himself enough to speak. Trembling slightly he replies; “I... I think I should go Jen, I’ll see you at school tomorrow”.   Just as Jared has his hand on the door nob Jensen quickly grabs his arm to stop him from leaving. He can't bare the thought that once Jared gets home he’s going to be in a lot of trouble.   Still facing the door Jared tries to keep his anger at bay as he asks through gritted teeth; “What do you want now 'Jensen’?”   Taken aback by the way Jared spat his name he replies desperately; “I just wanna help you Jay”.   Finally releasing some of his anger Jared viciously pulls his hand from Jensen's grasp as he turns quickly and screams in frustration; “DON’T YOU THINK YOU’VE FUCKING DONE ENOUGH?"   Looking up at Jared shocked by his outburst he takes a step back and with shame evident in his voice says; “I...I didn’t m-mean for... “.   Interrupting Jensen, Jared replies; “You know what? Just forget it alright".   Before he can say anything else Jared is already gone. Jensen doesn’t know what to do. He can't just let Jared go home to get bashed. It’d be so wrong of him. He promised him that he’d make everything okay, he promised that he was going to help him. But just letting Jared go like that makes him feel as though he’s giving up, which is something he promised him self he wouldn’t do. So without putting much thought into it Jensen quickly grabs his shoes and rushes down stairs hoping that he isn’t too late and that Jared is still in sight.   Jensen doesn’t plan on stopping him. What he plans to do is follow him. He gets that it may seem a bit creepy stalkerish of him, but he doesn’t know what else to do. If he tries to stop Jared again then that will just get him more riled up which will just make matters worse. He’s not even sure what he plans to do once he gets to Jared’s house, all he knows is that just sitting at home knowing that something could be happening to Jared at that exact moment is not the right thing to do.   Running to the front door he calls out to his mother letting her know that he’s going out. Quickly running up to the foot of the drive way he looks up and down the street in both directions hopping to God that Jared hasn’t gotten too far. Jensen breathes a sigh of relief once he spots him about 20 houses up on his left. Being careful that he stays close to the row of trees next to the foot path Jensen starts the slow and careful task of following Jared.   -----------------------------------------------------------------------   As Jared close the front door to Jensen’s house he feels as though he’s closing the door on his last chance at happiness. Jared’s not usually the type of guy that gets angry and snaps at people. He didn’t mean to yell at Jensen. Now that he thinks about it he wishes with all of his heart that he hadn't done it. But he was just so scared knowing what’s waiting for him when he returns home, so he just lost control and couldn’t stop the vicious words that flowed from his lips.   All he wants to do is go back there and tell Jensen that he’s sorry. Let him know that it's not Jensen's fault and most importantly that he doesn’t think he can do this without him. Although he knows that’s not possible. Jensen has probably already decided that he’s not worth the trouble. Realized that he just wasted an entire day on Jared's sorry ass.   Jared feels himself begin to tremble as he gets closer and closer towards his house. The long walk is slow and depressing. He doesn't even bother trying to rush because there is no point. The damage has already been done, he is late. It doesn't matter how late he is; It could be 5, 10 minuets or it could be 3 hours. Either way he would still receive the same horrific punishment.   As he reaches his next door neighbors house he just stops and stares. Stares at his new house. Not a home, but only a house. He has only ever had one real home in his life, although that was shattered by the carelessness and stupidity of a man who one afternoon decided to drive drunk. As he stands there he contemplates the thought of turning right back around towards Jensen's house, beg for forgiveness and just hide there, because even if he went missing his uncle probably wouldn't even try and bother to find him.   But his uncle has damaged him too much already. He doesn't have the strength or determination to defy his uncles rules. No matter the circumstances it has just been imprinted into his brain that if he disobeys the rules then he will most defiantly be punished. All he can think to himself is he deserves what he's about to get. He was late, so now he shall pay.   With that thought in mind he slowly makes his way up towards his front door. As he cautiously opens the door he is startled when his uncle grabs him by the wrist and drags him inside. As he stands there wide eyes with fear and tears unknowingly flowing from his eyes his uncle says in a very gruff but clear voice; "You've been a bad boy Jared, and now i think it's time for you to pay".   As Jared nods soundlessly he is unaware that Jensen - his last hope of happiness - is standing outside hiding silently behind a tree with tears streaming down his face and hand covering his mouth as he watches the interaction displayed before him. And as the door slowly closes shut Jensen can't prevent the loud and helpless scream full or desperation for the poor lonely boy inside that house that falls from his lips; "NOOOOOOOO".   TBC. . . . ***** Chapter 7 ***** Author's notes: Thanks to the people who left reviews =D =============================================================================== Chapter 7   As the door closes Jared feels his heart drop to the floor. That is until he hears a loud "NOOO" coming from the front yard. Jared knows that voice. He has only known it for two days but is sure that it's a voice that will go on with him forever. He doesn't think Jack heard because he doesn't seem at all fazed. Jared is thankful. He doesn't think he could live with himself if his Uncle did anything to Jensen.   Even as his Uncle drags him into the living room and pushes him to his knees, he doesn't feel as lost and helpless as he normally would. All because of that one beautiful sound he had heard. Not only was it Jensen, but it was someone who he now knows actually cares about him. It means that he's not alone in this world as long as Jensen is still there. As he feels the first blow to the side of his head he stays strong, and he just continues to stare down towards the floor because nothing can ruin the feeling that he has at this moment.   Well, that's what he thought. Untill he turns towards the living room window and realises that his Uncle has not yet pulled the curtains closed. Sudden panic begins to bubble within him. He can handle Jensen knowing that he gets bashed. But the thought of him finding out about all the other filthy things his Uncle does to him makes Jared do makes him feel as though he's going to faint. Plus the fact that he was just whacked on the side of the head isn't really helping much either.   "I have been waiting for you to come home all afternoon. Are you going to tell me where you were? It's already dark outside, you little bitch. Let me guess, you were with that boy, weren't you? You're such a little whore for cock. I made you love it and you know it. And since you love it so much, would it be wrong of me, as your loving Uncle to not give you what you want."   He knows whats coming next. His Uncle wouldn't make him kneel in front of him for no reason. So he isn't surprised when Jack unbuckles his belt, undoes his button and lowers the zipper. The sound is deafening to his ears. All he can do is pray to God that Jensen isn't watching any of this.   ~~~~~~~~~~   When Jensen sees him viciously pulled into the house, he already knows that Jared's in a lot of trouble. He also knows for a fact that it's all his fault. When Jensen sees Jared nod in defeat he feels desperation grabing at him. He can't let Jared get bashed. He just can't. And as he watches the door begin to close he knows that he has screwed up in a major way and isn't able to stop himself from yelling out.   He wasn't able to protect Jared. He promised that he would and he failed. He should be the one in there getting punished, not Jared, because he doesn't deserve any of this.   Once the door is shut, Jensen continues to stand there behind the tree trying to think of something to do before it's too late. He can't just go barging in there; Jared's Uncle is big. There's no way Jensen can beat him in a fight. Although he knows if worse comes to worse, he will not be able to control himself from doing just that.   While standing behind the tree Jensen can hear talking coming from the front window on the right side of the house. There is a dim light in the room, but not enough to completely see everything that is going on. He is quiet and discreet as he moves towards the window and hides beneath it where the bushes are. Luckily the window is open therefore making the task of eavesdropping a whole lot easier.   But Jensen was in no way prepared to hear what came next. Sitting silently, he hears part of the conversation - "Let me guess, you were with that boy, werent you? You are such a little whore for cock. I made you love it and you know it. So since you love it so much, it would be wrong of me as your loving Uncle to not give you what you want."   "Oh God," Jensen says mutters to himself, fearing what Jack meant by those vulgar words. He is so close to throwing up or passing out but gains enough control remembering that this is happening because of him, and he'll be damned if he doesn't figure out a way to stop it.   Just as he is texting Chris for some help, since he lives just at the end of Jared's street, he hears Jared cry out in pain. Looking up, Jensen doesn't know what to expect when he lays eyes on the scene before him. He gasps as he sees blood slowly trickling down from Jared's forehead, but almost faints when he sees Jack pull out his cock and teasingly wave it in Jared's face saying "Just look at you, so hungry for me. But don't worry my dear boy, I'll give you what you want, just like I always do. Uncle Jack always knows how to take care of his favourite nephew."   "Nonononono," Jensen chants, quickly clicking send, hoping to God that the message reaches Chris.   There was no time to call for any more help; if he doesn't get in there and something happens to Jared, he'll never be able to forgive himself. So without a second thought Jensen races towards the front door, swings it open and tries to prepare himself for the sight he is about to witness.   ~~~~~~~~~~   Jared screams out in pain as Jack's fist connects with his nose. He can already feel the blood begin to trickle down over his lip. Everything has begun to spin, he just can't seem to see or think straight, and as Jack grips his dick in his palm and begins to wave it in Jared's face, he isn't thinking about his pain nor disgust in what is happening. Because the only coherent thought he has running through his mind is Jensen might be watching this. 'Oh God, what am I going to do if Jensen is watching this? No matter how much he may care, there is no way he will want to stick around once he realises what Jack is really doing to me.'   "Just look at you, so hungry for me. But don't worry my dear boy, I'll give you what you want, just like I always do. Uncle Jack always knows how to take care of his favourite Nephew."   As Jack grabs hold of Jared's jaw he says, "Open up for me Jared, come on. I know that you want it."   The strength and hope he had earlier on in the night died within him, therefore leaving him way too weak physically and emotionally to fight his Uncle's commands. So trying not to think about what he is doing, Jared squeezes his eyes shut and obediently opens his mouth for the intrusion he knows is coming.   There is a loud thump from the front door at the same moment Jack viciously shoves his cock down Jared's throat.   Jack pulls out quickly, leaving Jared a coughing heap on the floor.   Alot of unexpected things have happened in Jared's life, but nothing has ever shocked him as much as the sight of Jensen standing in the living room doorway looking shocked, terrified, angry and concerned. Except Jared couldn't see one glimpse of the emotion he had expeceted to see plastered all over his face...disgust.   Jared feels his heart swell as he meets Jensen's concerned gaze staring down at him from the doorway. That is, until he realises the situation that they are both in. Not only is Jared himself in danger, but Jensen barging in here also leaves him vulnerable and open to attack. Oh God, Jared thinks to himself, as he realises that Jensen could get hurt. 'Ohfuckohfuckohfuck, what the hell have I done?' continues to run through Jared's head.   Jack continues to stare at Jensen with shock and his dick still hanging out until it all finally clicks.   His expression quickly changes from shocked to confident and finally to cocky as he says, "So, you must be Jensen, am I right?"   Not being able to think straight because of the sight of Jared laying helpless and bleeding on the floor, he stupidly replies, "What's it mean to you?"   "Pssst, don't play dumb with me, boy, I heard the message you left for Jared on his phone last night. But don't worry, he paid for being a bad little boy and the same thing's going to happen to you if you don't get outta here right FUCKING NOW!"   Jensen was finding it hard to breathe once the realisation hits that it was his fault Jared was all bruised up, and Oh God if he was going to do that type of stuff to Jared right now....oh shit, what did he really do to him last night? Fuck, he can't let that happen again. Building up all his courage, Jensen narrows his eyes and with confidence says, "Why don't you try and fuckin' make me, you son of a bitch?"   Fearing the worst for Jensen, Jared looks up into his eyes with desperation and says pleadingly, "God, Jen, please don't do this. Just leave before you get hurt too."   Smiling cockily, Jack says in a teasingly girly voice, "Yeah, Jen, just leave. I just couldn't bare the thought of you been hurt."   Walking further into the room, Jensen descends upon Jack and states in a stern voice through tight lips, "I said it once, and I'll say it again...I AIN'T FUCKING LEAVING! I'm not stepping foot outside of this room unless it's with Jared."   Jared continues to lay in a messed up heap on the floor behind both men, not knowing what to do and just feeling lost and helpless. He still can't seem to get the fact out of his head that Jensen is actually here. Even after what he saw, Jensen hasn't left him yet. He still cares. Jared can't let the only person who still cares about him get hurt. Although he knows that the only way Jensen is going to leave is if it's with him.   While Jensen and Jack continue to stand there staring each other down, Jared decides to do something he has never ever dared to do before. Because with Jensen standing there trying to protect him he couldn't help the extra courage that suddenly fills him from within. So without much of a second thought he pulls himself to his feet, stands behind Jack and says sternly, "I'm going with Jensen."   Not really taking Jared seriously, Jack turns around to face him and replies sarcastically, "Yes Jared, of course you are,"   Not letting Jack's words faze him he spits back, "I SAID, I am leaving. You can't keep me here. If you try, then I...I'll just tell the police all about what you've been doing to me."   Laughing out loud, Jack replies, "Hmm, lil Jared thinks he's all big now, does he? Well go ahead, call them. Let everyone know what a little slut you are for my cock. Plus the fact that even if you do tell them, who's going to believe you anyway? You're just a poor little boy who has had to be homeschooled most of his life, 'cause he couldn't handle being around other kids because he know it's his fault that his parents are dead. They will just think you're stark crazy for attention, that you've gone a little insane over the years."   Jensen can see the hurtful words begin to sink in, he can see the wall Jared has built begin to crumble around him. He can't let that happen. Jared has made it this far, he will not allow him to turn back now.   "Please, Jay, don't listen to him. You know that's not true. It wasn't your fault that your parents died. You didn't make that drunk driver hit them. I can help you, Jay...please let me help you. What he said...it's not true, none of it."   Once again letting out a loud and boisterous laugh Jack says "Well ain't you two just the cutest little couple? Look Jay, he's sticking up for you. I wonder if he'd still be here if he found out about all the fun things we get up to. All the naughty things you let me do to you. Ohh God, maybe if he's lucky I'll even let him join in on the fun."   "NOOOO!" Jared screams desperately. "Just no, please Jack. I'll stay, I promise I'll stay. Just please don't hurt Jensen, he hasn't done anything to deserve it."   "FUCK Jay, you don't get to decide that. I told you I'm not leaving you and that's final, so get used to it. I made a promise and I'm not breaking it. You got hurt enough because of me and I'm not letting that happen again."   "Please, Jen," Jared begs. "There's nothing else you can do. You have no idea how grateful I am that you actually care, but I couldn't handle it if he hurt you".   Staring past Jack and straight into Jared's eyes he replies seriously, "And what? You think I can handle it knowing that he's hurting you? Well fuck that Jared, cause I can't. I'm just not like that. I care for you too much already to let anything else happen to you. You've been through so much and you don't deserve this. Nobody deserves this type of treatment."   Not breaking their gaze Jared says, "I know that you care, Jen, but it's just not worth all the troub...."   Clearing his throut loudly Jack spits, "I hate to interrupt your chickfest ladies, but either Jensen gets the FUCK out of my house or I swear to God he is going to regret it".   Turning back towards Jack, Jensen stares him straight in the eyes and with an icy tone replies, "What are you going to do, JACK ? 'Cause if you lay one fucking finger on me then you're gonna pay."   "We'll just see about that, you little bitch!" Jack shouts back before his fist shoots out hitting Jensen hard in the stomach.   Jensen feels all the air get knocked out of him as he bends forward clutching his stomach and groaning in pain. Although one hit isn't going to make him give up...."Just you wait, you son of a bitch, you can hit me as much as you want but it aint going to make me leave."   Jared stands there shocked and full of terror as he watches Jack hit Jensen. He wants to move, but his muscles feel frozen. He wants to scream but his throat seems to have closed up. All he can do is stand there, not moving, not making a sound and be forced to watch something that he had caused and for some reason can't stop.   As Jensen takes the next blow to his jaw and the third to his upper lip, all he does is stand there in retaliation refusing to move unless it is with Jared. He knew that protesting Jack's orders probably won't do any good, but he also knows that leaving Jared here to get bashed would be even worse.   Jared begins to feel queesy as he sees the fourth blow hit Jensen's stomach once again. He just wishes that Jensen had left while he still could. There is nothing either of them can do now. Jared just wants everything to end, and as everything begins to go black the last coherent thought he remembers having is, 'Who the hell is that other dude in the doorway?'   TBC ***** Chapter 8 ***** Author's notes: Sorry about the long wait, but my god damn computer crashed so I had to sneak onto my brothers to post this lol =============================================================================== Chapter 8   Up the street, seven minutes earlier....   Chris is in the shower washing the conditioner out of his hair when he hears the 'bling bling' of his cell indicating a text message.   "Arrrgh, stupid piece of crap always goes off at all the wrong times," Chris grumbles to himself.   Quickly rinsing his hair he steps out of the shower with a groan and reaches over to the sink where he always places his cell while showering. After drying off his hands he picks it up and sees the flashing sign indicating a new text message from Jensen.   He opens it up and reads:   need hlp . bring ur gun.   house num 37 ur street   hurry   Chris reads it three times in shock, wondering what type of trouble Jensen could have possibly gotten himself into that requires him needing a gun. He's been best friend's with Jensen for a long time now and knows that he barely ever gets himself into trouble. Plus the fact that Jensen seemed to disappear after the homeroom bell this morning was beginning to trouble him.   He doesn't spend anymore time contemplating, realising that every extra second he takes the more trouble Jensen could be getting himself into. So quickly drying himself off and grabbing an old pair of Jeans and a tee-shirt he runs into his parent's room (thanking God that they're not home) and hurries over to the safe hidden in his dad's wardrobe.   "FUCK!" he mutters to himself, remembering that he doesn't know the code. His Dad has always hid it from him, worrying about what he'd do if he got his hands on the gun. Althought he knows that his Mum would be less reluctant to tell him then his Dad.   "Fuck, fuck, FUCK! Jensen is counting on me. I can't let him down."   With that said he runs back into the bathroon, sits on the edge of the bathtub and dials his mother's number.   "Hang on for me Jen, I'm coming," he whispers to himself, tapping his foot impatiently on the ground waiting for her to pick up.   "Yes, sweetie, anything up?" asks his Mother.   "Uhh, yeah, Mom I need you to to do something for me and not ask any questions, just know that I promise it's for a good reason. You've just gotta trust me. If you don't do this for me, Jensen could be in a lot trouble," rambled Chris in a hurry.   Gasping into the phone, wondering what could have happened to her son's sweet friend, she hesitantly asks, "What is it, honey?"   Taking a deep breath he replies, "I need you to tell me the code for the safe. Please, ma, I wouldn't ask unless I was completely desperate, you just gotta trust me."   "H-honey you know I can't do...."   Chris cuts her off halfway through, interrupting with "Mom, I'm really in a hurry here, can you do this for me or not?"   Letting the trust for her son kick in she says hesitantly before hanging up, "22694, be careful, Chris. I love you."   Not wasting any more time, Chris puts his phone down and quickly hurries over to the safe, putting in the code his mother had told him. When it opens he breathes a sigh of relief, grabs the gun and puts it in the waste of his jeans. Forgetting about his shoes, Chris flies out the door, desperately rushing down the street, just hoping that he isn't too late.   --------------------------------------------------------   Chris runs up the porch of house number 37, noticing that the door is wide open. He hears someone groan out loud in pain, "OH SHIT," quickly rushing in through the front door knowing that it sounded like Jensen.   He runs into the room he heard the noise coming from and stops dead in the doorway as he sees Jensen take a hard one to the stomach and that new boy Jared pass out bleeding right behind.   "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE ?" He announces loudly, never really understanding the meaning or need for subtlety.   Jack whips around shocked and Jensen just stands there holding his stomach with a proud and relieved smile on his face. Chris may be an ass, but he's always there when it truly counts.   "Thanks man, I knew you'd come." Jensen sounds exhausted, not to mention he is in excrutiating pain.   Chris smiles kindly at Jensen then turns towards Jack, who is still standing there looking absolutely fuming.   "So are you gonna let mah boy and his lil friend over there go, or are you gonna do this the hard way?" Chris asks, pointing towards Jared in the back.   Eyes boring holes into Chris, Jack replies, "If you can get past me then go ahead, you little shit."   Chris looks down shaking his head and laughing to himself. "Well I personaly may not be able to, but I'm pretty sure this little beauty would do the trick." Chris glances up at Jack and pulls out the gun.   Jensen can't help but laugh a little at the look of complete and total shock on Jack's face. Realising that he's momentarily distracted, he turns around to get Jared.   A gasp escapes his throat as he lays eyes on Jared's dormant form laid out before him.   "Shit shit shit!" he says quickly, hurrying over to him, completely forgetting about the drama unfolding behind them. 'Gotta Help Jared,' the only coherent thought running through his head at that moment.   As he reaches Jared he crouches down beside him pulling him into his arms. He gently brushes his damp hair back off his forehead, glancing intently at the cut just above his hairline caused most likely by Jack's fake diamond ring. He calms down a tiny bit when he realises that it's not that deep and doesn't need stitches like he originally thought because of the amount of blood. Although it doesn't stop his anxiety and need to wake Jared up.   "Please Jay....don't do this to me man, just wake up. Chris is here, he can help. Just...please wake up for me, Jay" he whispers, more than a bit worried as he caresses Jared's cheek lovingly and leans down to press a kiss to his forehead.   Chris looks behind Jack glancing at Jensen as he holds Jared in his arms, tears streaming down his face as he rocks back and forth gently. He has never seen his friend like this before. Jensen looks so lost and full of despair. He doesn't know how any of this happened, and he honestly doesn't care. As long as he gets both of those boys out of here safely he'll be happy.   Chris turns back towards Jack and looks him straight in the eye as he says, quite intimidating, "Get the FUCK, out of my way you son of a bitch or I swear I'll shoot. Don't think I won't ‘cause that’s my boy back there and I won’t hesitate to kill anyone who lays one fucking finger on him." With a smirk he continues "You’re lucky you’re still standing."   Jack's never afraid, he's never the one at a loss, he's always in control. Although right now, staring down the barrel of a gun…he's a nervous wreck. He swallows hard and tries to maintain his calm appearance and not let show how scared shitless he actually is.   Trying to act as though he doesn't even care, Jack replies, "If you wanted the little shits so bad all you had to do was say so. I don't care. Just take ‘em. A-and don't come back."   Smiling cockily he says in a cheery upbeat voice, "What ever you say, Captain Jack."   Grumbling out a few profanities, Jack finally stalks his way out of the room, heads to the back of the house slamming the back door shut and going out for a smoke.   Breathing a sigh of relief Chris quickly turns his attention back towards Jensen, remembering that there is still a lot they have to get sorted out.   Jensen glances up through damp and hazy eyes as he feels Chris sit next to him. Letting out a heartbreaking sob Jensen cries desperately, "He won't wake up, Chris, he just won't fuckin’ wake up." Looking back down at Jared's peaceful but bruised face, he lets out another sob and feels Chris place an arm comfortingly around his back.   Trying to lighten the mood a little bit Chris says, "Well I guess this wouldn't be a good time to let you know that it's so obvious you've fallen for this kid already. Two days, man, you've known him for two days. But what can I say, you've always had a soft spot for the wounded type. But don't worry man. I'm sure Jared will be fine, probably just fainted or something."   Keeping his eyes firmly on the boy lying in his arms he smiles slightly at Chris's attempt to cheer him up.   "Yeah I, guess you’re right," he says lightly, running his fingertips over the bruises plastered across Jared's beautiful face. Looking up towards Chris, Jensen says politely, "C-c-can I just have a minute alone with him please, I just wanna say some stuff."   Smiling understandingly Chris nods. "Sure man, I'll just be outside. Come get me when you need me."   With that said, Chris stands up and makes his way for the front door, glancing out the back to ensure Jack is still out there having a smoke before he leaves, which he thankfully is.   Looking back down at Jared's calm but motionless face, Jensen tries to hold himself together. He's breathing fine and his pulse is strong but he still can't get rid of the fear that’s eating his insides out. Never in his worst nightmares would he have ever imagined this happening to anyone. But right here, right now, he is holding a boy who has gone through so much pain and horror in his life but remains to be the most amazing human being he has ever met.   Jensen doesn't know how to explain it. But from the moment he laid eyes on Jared he knew there was something special about him. He knew there was more to him then the shy blushing boy he first met. Although he knew that for some reason he had to help. He didn't even know what it was he felt the urge to fix. He doesn't know why he felt it. All he knows is that it was there.   As tears continue to stream down his face he looks down at Jared and says, "God Jay, only two days. Two goddamn days and you can already manage to reduce me to a blubbering crying girl. I just want you to wake up, Jay. I-I wanna get to know the real…." He cried out a choked sob before he continued more strongly. "I want to get to know the real you, Jay. I wanna ask you out on a date. I wanna make up for what I have caused and most importantly…I-I wanna help you, Jay."   Jensen looked down and squeezed his eyes tightly shut trying to will the tears away. That is until he felt a gentle hand caress his cheek and softly wipe away his tears.   Looking up wide eyed and shocked, Jensen stares at Jared wordlessly, almost unbelievably as Jared just looks right back with a hint of a smile on his lips.   "J-Jay?" asks Jensen as he brings his hand up to the side of Jared's face, almost too afraid to touch as if, if he does then this will suddenly no longer be real, just an illusion.   Taking a deep breath of fresh air Jared replies, "Yeah, Jen, yeah it's me."   Jared is suddenly enveloped in a huge hug from Jensen. He then huffs out a small laugh and rubs his back soothingly trying to calm Jensen down.   Sitting upright again and releasing his death hold on Jared, he says, "God Jay, you scared me half to death. Don't ever do that again, okay?"   Smiling widely back up at Jensen, Jared replies sarcastically with a roll of his eyes, "Thanks for the tip, Jen, I'll make sure I let my body know that, since you know it can stop me fainting on demand."   "Smartass," Jensen says playfully.   Meeting Jensen's eyes, Jared replies, "Yeah, but you love me for it anyway."   Holding Jared's gaze Jensen says seriously, "Yeah, I guess I do."   Jared looks down, smiling slightly and blushing, he doesn't know how to reply to something like that, so he just lays there in Jensen's arms and enjoys the comfortable silence that surrounds them both.   Well that is until it's interrupted from someone in the doorway saying, "Hey Jenny, you two girls ready to get out of here yet?"   Jared turns his gaze towards the voice and suddenly remembers everything. His Uncle, the window, Jensen getting bashed, and that mysterious man standing in the doorway just like now.   To Jensen's surprise, Jared quickly jumps up out of his arms, stands up quickly and starts frantically searching around him as if trying to find something, while trying not to tumble over because he still feels weak.   Jensen also stands quickly and Chris moves further into the room. Jensen places both hands on Jared's shoulders to stop what looks like an oncoming panic attack.   With Chris standing next to him also looking worried and confused at Jared, Jensen says, "Hey, Jay, Jay calm down. Just tell me what going on. What’s wrong?"   Looking towards Jensen, Jared rambles in a panicked state. "M-my Uncle, where is he? He was here when I passed out, where is he now? He wouldn't have just given up. Oh God, Jen, you gotta get out of here before he comes back. Shit man, are you alright? And what are you still doing here?"   Realisation finally hits as to the cause of Jared's odd behaviour. He realises that the last thing Jared probably remembers seeing is Jack beating the shit out of him. ‘Oh God, I am so fucking stupid,’ he thinks to himself.   With his arms holding Jared still, Jensen stares right into his fearful and confused eyes and says, "Shhh, don't worry, it's all been taken care of. I'm fine, I promise and you will be, too. You just got to come with us okay? That guy right there," he says pointing to Chris, "his name is Chris, he's a good friend of mine and you can trust him. He lives just up this street, we can go there for now. Come on, we better get going."   Trying to take it all in at once, Jared just blinks dumbly and nods before quickly spitting out, "W-where is he, Jen? What happened?"   Smiling sympathetically he bring his hand up and tenderly holds Jared's face, not even caring that Chris is there and how cheesy he may be acting. "Don't worry Jay, it's all been taken care of. I promise I'll explain everything to you later. Although don't think this is the end, Jack will get what’s coming to him eventually, I promise. But first we need to get you out of here, okay? "   Jensen knows he should call the police but he's not stupid and knows that doing so would just make Jared freak out even more and completely ruin Jareds trust towards him.     Trusting Jensen's judgement he looks over to Chris and then back to Jensen, and with a hint of a barely there smile he replies, "Yeah, yeah okay, let’s go, Jen."   Smiling back with a nod Jensen drapes Jared's arm over his shoulder and he, Chris and Jared all finally make their way out of that hell hole.   ------------------------------------------------------------   Jared is sitting on Chris's couch draped in a warm blanket, waiting for Jensen to come back from making a call to someone in the back room, when Chris walks out of the kitchen with a warm cup of coffee. They had both already explained to him what happened while he was passed out, which made him able to relax a lot more. Taking the offered and very much needed coffee, Jared smiles up at him thankfully. He's still not very sure whether he can entirely trust him or not, but he trusts Jensen, and if Jensen says that he's safe then there’s nothing else he can really do but trust his judgement.   Smiling awkwardly, Chris takes a seat next to Jared. Noticing his apprehension he breaks the silence by saying, "You, don't have to be afraid of me you know? I'm a good guy and I won't hurt you. I admit that the first time I saw you at school I didn't get why Jensen seemed so determined to get to know you, but well…now I do."   Holding his warm mug in both hands Jared looks up at him soundlessly with a questioning look in his eyes.   Grinning widely Chris says, "By the looks of that…uhh, look I'm guessing it’s story time?"   Jared laughs lightly smiling back up at him kindly. "Yeah, well if you wouldn't mind sharing what you meant by that."   Chris just nods and brings one knee up on to the couch turning more fully towards Jared. "Well, uhh, I met Jenny boy about three years back. He just came up to me one day and introduced himself. I was a little reluctant back then ‘cause just like you I didn't really trust anyone. I kept on telling him to go away but for some reason he stuck to me like a leech. He knew that something was wrong. I don't know how he knew, all I know is that for some reason it was as if he could see my pain, and no matter how much I tried to get him to leave the topic alone he wouldn't do it until I let him in and told him what was wrong."   Taking a deep breath Jared says quietly "I don't wanna intrude but, what was, you know…wrong?"   "Well I am bisexual and back then I was only fourteen. I was just a kid trying to figure myself out you know? Anyway, I met this guy. He seemed really nice at first. Let me try things with him and never pushed me into anything I didn't want. He was seventeen at the time. My parents knew about him and they weren't happy. Not because of him being a guy, but because of his age, they said they were afraid he'd push me into things. I ignored them of course thinking that he was the best."   Nodding understandingly Jared had a feeling he knew where this was going. He looked at Chris sympathetically and motioned for him to continue.   "Everything began to change about two months in. He started to really show his true colours. He all of a sudden became extremely jealous. Therefore whenever I'd talk to other guys he'd be furious. The first time he ever hit me I was devastated, but afterwards he apologized, told me he loved me and said he'd never do it again. I believed him, let him convince me it was my fault. And the second, third, forth and so on times he did it I'd just ignore it and tell myself it would get better." Chris paused, than continued. "Of course it didn't. Every time that he hit me he would force me into having sex with him after. It was his way of saying sorry. After four months of this I had absolutely no self worth or confidence left. My parents kept on trying to push me to break up with him, but I refused, thinking that he still loved me and not knowing what I'd do without him." He smiled toward Jared. "That is until Jensen came along. He waited patiently for me to tell him what was going on until I couldn't hold it in any longer. One day I just let it all out expecting him to be disgusted in me. But he wasn't. He convinced and helped me believe that I was worth something. That I could do better. He stayed and supported me the whole way through until I finally gained enough courage to break it off."   Trying to hold back the tears he looked directly into Jared's eyes and continued "That‘s why I'm not surprised he seems so attached to you. Jen is just a caring guy. He can't stand to see someone hurt, he always feels the need to help. Now don't get me wrong, I ain‘t trying to say the only reason he's helping you is 'cause he feels as though he needs to. That‘s not all, I can tell he really cares about you deeply. I had never seen him as devastated as he was when you were lying unconscious in his arms. I can already tell he's got a thing for you, but whatever you do, don't tell him I said that ‘cause he'd kill me."   Jared laughs lightly and nods, saying, "Yeah, don't worry. I won't say a thing, and uh, thanks for sharing that story with me man. I don't think I can tell you how much it really meant to me. So yeah, I really appreciate it."   When Jensen walks back in through the doorway he is shocked to find Jared and Chris sitting there looking at each other smiling. He stops, folds his arms and clears his throat for attention. With an adorable pout on his face he says, "I feel so left out right now. Since when did you two become such great buddies?"   Chris stands up and heads towards Jensen saying, "Awww, don't worry Jenny. I won't steal any more of your lover boy‘s time. Don't get too jealous, we were just talking about you."   Scoffing Jensen says, "Would anyone mind filling me in on why I was the topic of conversation?"   Smiling back at him Chris says cockily, "Nah, sorry man, but I can't. It’s mine and Jared's secret. But don't worry, we didn't say anything TOO bad about you."   Pouting even more Jensen walks over to Jared as Chris makes his way out of the room to give them some privacy. Taking Chris's spot on the couch, Jensen moves closer to Jared and tries not to wince from the excruciating pain in his ribs. Cupping Jareds face he places a soft and unexpected kiss on his lips just before Chris exits making sure that he saw.   "What was that for?" asks Jared, looking a little dazed.   Scratching the back of his neck Jensen shrugs saying, "I just, when I saw you lying there today. I promised myself that when you woke up I'd do that. Just to be able to kiss you any time, any where, remind myself that you’re actually here I guess." Smiling sheepishly Jensen adds on, "Plus the fact that maybe I wanted to make sure Chris knows to keep his hands off you may have been part of my motivation."   Laughing lightly Jared looks down shyly, a blush creeping up his cheeks and places his coffee mug on the table next to him. Feeling exhausted he places the pillow Chris brought out earlier at the foot of the couch and lays down, his feet on Jensen's lap. He scoots over to the side, lifting up the blanket signalling for Jensen to join him.   Jensen smiles at the invitation and happily lays down next to Jared under the blankets warmth as he gently pulls Jared closer, holding him comfortingly in his arms as they both lay there in peaceful silence.   Both facing each other on the pillow, Jared stares directly into Jensen's eyes and feels his stomach flutter. ‘God he has the most amazing green eyes I've ever seen,’ Jared thinks to himself.   ‘Jesus, his lips look so soft and oh God kissable,’ Jensen contemplates silently.   This goes on for several minutes, both boys not able to take their eyes off the other. Both feeling a strong connection flowing through them, emitting feelings both have never even touched upon. Never before has either of them felt something so right, as if this is how it’s meant to be. The both of them lying in each others arms, thinking the same thoughts, feeling the safe feelings and breathing the same breath.   Breaking the comfortable silence Jensen brings his hand up to Jared's face and says, "God Jay, what are you doing to me?" just as his lips finally crash into Jared's.   Jared gasps in surprise but doesn't move away, just pushes his lips back more firmly against Jensen's. Neither knows how long they stay like that, mouths moving together softly, breaths mingling, teeth biting, hands touching.   Jared can't help the soft moan that escapes him as he feels Jensen's soft wet tongue licking at his lips asking for entry. Jensen's thumb slowly caressing his cheek as he lets him in.   Jensen sweeps his tongue across Jared's teeth before he enters the depth of his mouth exploring every possible inch there is to explore. Their tongues meet in fiery passion and both can't get enough of the other. They kiss as though it’s going to be their last, trying to memorise the taste and feel of the other.   Jared doesn't want to leave the welcoming warmth of Jensen's mouth nor, separate himself from the feel of Jensen's soft beautiful lips moving slickly against his, but the need for air cannot be ignored. They break the kiss with a gasp, foreheads pressed together, lips still lightly ghosting over the others as they both breathe heavily trying to suck much needed air into their lungs.   "Are you okay with this?" asks Jensen, feeling concerned that he's pushing Jared too much.   Taking another deep breath Jared keeps his eyes focused on Jensen as he says, "Yeah, yeah Jen, I am."   "Good," Jensen replies, smiling as he threads his fingers through Jared's soft and smooth hair bringing their lips together once again.   This time it isn't as frantic, it's more soft and sensual then the last. Taking their time to explore the other’s mouth more thoroughly. Drowning in the feel of soft kiss swollen lips, smooth slick tongues and just the intoxicating feel of the others presence.   Jared can't help the small moans that escape him.   Jensen just can't get enough of them. All he wants to do is lay here all day and find out what he can do to cause Jared to make those adorable little sounds that drive him crazy. Although he knows they can't. There are still so many things they need to talk about, so many things that need sorting out.   So using every last ounce of self control he has left he reluctantly separates the kiss.   Jared looks at Jensen confused as to why he stopped the kiss, thinking that he probably did something wrong. Feeling slightly nervous and a little bit self conscious Jared asks, "Is everything okay, Jen? I'm sorry if I'm no good at it, I've never really…uhhh…." Blushing deeply Jared stops before he embarrasses himself any more.   Looking back up at Jared sharply, Jensen replies quickly and desperately, "Oh God, Jared no. Don't think that okay? I didn't stop because of you, you were…you were amazing to say the least. I stoped ‘cause there are some things we really gotta talk about."   "Oh," Jared says looking down, feeling a little embarrassed.   Letting out a soft laugh Jensen says, "God you‘re so silly sometimes, Jay," as he lifts his head back up and places a soft and reassuring kiss to his lips.   Jared feels his heart flutter in his chest at that simple gesture, not used to been so doted upon. "So, Jen, what did you wanna talk about ?"   Sitting back up in the corner of the couch, Jensen motions for Jared to sit between his legs so he's more comfortable while they talk. Jared does just that and pulls the blanket up around them both as Jensen wraps his arms protectively around his waist and kisses him softly on the top of the head.   When they're both comfortably settled in, Jensen grasps Jared's hands laying over his stomach and holds them tightly knowing that having to actually deal with what’s going to happen next is the hardest part of all and wanting to offer support. Moving one hand up to his chest he gently caresses it in a soothing motion as he says, "I think you should know, that there is absolutely no way in hell I am allowing you go back to that house no matter what. So that means we gotta work out a place for you to stay."   Not wanting to be too much of a bother Jared whispers quietly, "You don't have to you know, I have had to deal with this for a long time now. I'll be fine. I don't want you to worry too much."   Turning Jared's face upwards to his he looks at him incredulously. He leans down and kisses him softly. "To" kiss "Fuckin’" kiss "Late" he says, hoping he gets his point across.   Breathing out an exhausted sigh, Jared says, "Jensen, even if I didn't go back I'd have nowhere to go. I don't have any other family."   Smiling sheepishly Jensen replies, "I kinda got that part figured out. Earlier on when I was on the phone I was talking to my Mom. I didn't tell her anything. I just said that I have a really special friend who desperately needs somewhere to stay and that he has nowhere else to go."   Tightening his hold on Jared he continues. "I also told her what a sweet boy you are and that you wouldn't be much trouble. She said yes straight away. Said you could stay as long as you want. There’s a spare bedroom next to mine and you don't need to worry about money since my parents are pretty loaded."   Jared was speechless. He doesn’t know how to respond to such a huge offer like that. Nobody has ever done something this big for him. Nobody has ever cared enough.   Before Jared even has the chance of rejecting his offer Jensen quickly added in, "And oh yeah, I won't take no for an answer so don't even bother."   Nodding slowly, Jared looks up towards Jensen with shiny tear soaked eyes as he lifts his hand up to his face and brings it down until their lips meet once again.   When they finally break apart Jared asks with a croaky voice, "What the hell did I do to deserve you, Jen?"   Smiling back down at him Jensen replies, "I've been asking myself the same thing, Jay."   Jared lays back in Jensen's arms, his head lying on his chest while tears fall silently as Jensen gently brushes his fingers through Jared's hair. Softly massaging his scalp trying to offer the comfort he knows is desperately needed.   They sit like that for several minutes until they hear the doorbell ring. Jared's head shoots up in alarm, afraid of who it could be.   Chris walks into the room announcing, "Your Mom’s here to pick you two up, Jen."   Nodding at him thankfully Jensen looks back down at Jared, places one last soft kiss on his lips as he says, "You ready to go, Jay?"   Taking a deep breath Jared nods his head in affirmation and says back confidently, "Ready as I'll ever be."   TBC Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!