Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/12996855.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Major_Character_Death, Underage
  Category:
      F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi
  Fandom:
      僕のヒーローアカデミア_|_Boku_no_Hero_Academia_|_My_Hero_Academia
  Relationship:
      Midoriya_Izuku/Todoroki_Shouto, Bakugou_Katsuki/Midoriya_Izuku, Midoriya
      Izuku_&_Everyone, Midoriya_Izuku/Shinsou_Hitoshi, Midoriya_Izuku/
      Shigaraki_Tomura_|_Shimura_Tenko, Dabi/Midoriya_Izuku, literally_everyone
      loves_izuku
  Character:
      Midoriya_Izuku, Shigaraki_Tomura_|_Shimura_Tenko, Bakugou_Katsuki,
      Todoroki_Shouto, Yagi_Toshinori_|_All_Might, Todoroki_Enji_|_Endeavor,
      Bakugou_Katsuki's_Parents, Class_1-A_(My_Hero_Academia), Class_1-B_(My
      Hero_Academia), Shinsou_Hitoshi, Dabi_(My_Hero_Academia), Toga_Himiko,
      Kurogiri_(My_Hero_Academia), Sensei_|_All_For_One, Chisaki_Kai_|_Overhaul
  Additional Tags:
      Dekubowl, Villain_Midoriya_Izuku, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff, Romance,
      Emotional_Manipulation, Manipulation, Physical_Abuse, izuku_hurts_a_lot,
      ending_undecided, Pain, izuku_gives_villains_info, bad_izuku, trigger
      warning_just_in_case, izuku_acts_innocent, Teasing, Fighting, some_funny
      moments, Blood, Everyone_Loves_Deku, i'll_add_more_tags_once_I_figure_out
      more, i_suck_at_writing_so_sorry, Attempt_at_Humor, Schizophrenia,
      schizophrenic_izuku, crazy_Izuku, multiple_personalty_izuku, Mental
      Illness, 'numb'_izuku, smart_izuku, Mad_Scientists, 'doctor'_izuku,
      scientist_izuku, izuku_helps_the_villains, izuku_also_hates_heroes, Izuku
      has_a_quirk
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-12-12 Updated: 2018-02-17 Chapters: 3/? Words: 3094
****** The Hero Tragedy ******
by yaoiukuseme
Summary
     He felt foolish to ever keep believing he could have been a hero when
     he was told way before All might to give up and that he'll never be a
     hero. Izuku guessed they all were right, he wasn't fit for the role
     of a hero he truly never was. Maybe, however he was something else?
Notes
     Hello! welcome to my first story on this site! sorry if it's bad as
     all living shit, I'm trying. I hope you guys enjoy this story, please
     leave positive comments.
     Warnings : schizophrenia, language, blood, gore, fighting,
     depression, paranoia, anxiety
     More will be tagged later on.
***** Before the fall of a prince *****
Chapter Notes
     Warnings: schizophrenia, mental illness, depression, language, blood,
     gore, paranoia
Izuku Midoriya thought he was numb when he was five at the doctors, being told
he was never going to get his quirk and being told that he was just normal
person. He was so numb then that all he could hear was the ringing in his ears,
and the sounds of his heart breaking into pieces. Now, was the same thing but
far more extreme. His hero, the person he looked up to was telling him that he,
a quirkless boy, could not be a hero being his quirkless self.
The ringing in his ears, the numbness, the pieces that were taped together to
keep him functioning were kill him. The world was to silent, his heart was too
loud, the dark spots in his eyes telling him to breathe. Did he want to breathe
though? If izuku was honest with himself he really didn’t want to breathe at
this very moment or ever again.
Kaachan was right.
The doctor was right.
The world was right.
A quirkless boy like himself could never have his dreams of being a hero come
true. A voice in the back of his head was telling him that All might was gone,
left him there on the roof, but he didn’t care. Was he really so blind that he
couldn’t see that his dream was just that, a dream. It wasn’t reality.
Move Izuku
A voice, a new one that didn’t sound like himself yelled loudly in his head.
Flinching, izuku finally saw in color yet again, but it was duller, not as
bright, and not as hopeful as before. Walking in auto pilot izuku slowly made
his way over to the door of the roof, but when he got there he never moved to
open it just stared blankly at the door, the black rusting old door.
He was like this door. It wasn’t a great analogy but he was. He was useless on
this roof that barely anyone came up too, leaving him to rust and rot away
alone. Was he alone? He felt like it.
Your mother.
Izuku’s subconscious gave out to him, which yes, he had his mother but even
then she knew he couldn’t be a hero. Hell she even cried when he pointed to the
video, his once favorite video, and asked her if he could be. She never denied
that he couldn’t sure, but she never told him he could either, just cried on
him as he cried too.
Izuku honestly felt like a broken toy. Could he be fix? Physically yes,
mentally no. He wasn’t needed in this world, this world of heroes in quirks. So
why was he even born without his quirk in this world that was made for them?
Why did he suffer when he did nothing wrong?
whywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhyWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHY-STOP!
Jumping slightly, izuku crawled out of his dark headspace he was going down and
opened the door walking away from the scene of the crime.
What crime? You may be asking. Well the crime of someone killing izuku’s dreams
and telling him he could never be a hero. And as he walked home, eyes blank
barely moving, he never heard the sirens that would have once drawn his
attention. He never heard, nor saw, people screaming out or the flames that
towered over the buildings.
He never saw nor saved his childhood friend Kaachan.
And as he made it home, numbing waving to his mother who instantly grew worried
after seeing his blank face, his cold look in his eyes that were filled with
such sorrow, pain, agony, and hopelessness. She tried to talk to him, but he
only shut his door in her face barely registering her voice.
The voices in his head were too loud.
***** Life's cruel fate *****
Chapter Notes
     warning on prologue chapter
The night when he came home, he destroyed his bedroom. Ripped it all apart,
took everything he once loved he destroyed it. Almost like what everyone did to
him but they destroyed him much more worse than he was destroying his room. He
punched the wall several times, over and over, and over and over till his
knuckles were red with blood, his blood. His mother stood by the door, shaking
as hands were over her mouth and when izuku turned towards his mother, she ran
to him and hugged him. Not that it helped, but he let her give him her love.
Izuku could hardly care less. And in a way that scared him, he used to love his
mother’s hug. When did that stop?
When everyone crushed your hopes and dreams
An somewhat familiar voice in the back of his spoke. It wasn’t wrong. It knew
izuku well, maybe because it is izuku but that was specifics that izuku didn’t
want to go into nor did he care. So as he let his mother hug him he not
returning the hug as his face was void of emotions.
Finally his mother released him from the hug and tried to reach to his hands,
but that’s when izuku moved. He slapped his mother’s hand away from him, blood
going to her hand and a flick of pain to come to his open wounds on his
knuckles but he ignored it.
“Don’t touch me” he told his mother, who after her shock wore off she covered
her mouth and got up running away.
Leaving Izuku to his thoughts yet again. He looked down at his hands, saw the
warmish slick blood drying up on his knuckles. That was when izuku cried. He
fell onto his side and curled in on his himself, bringing his hands to his
chest. What was happening to him? Who was he becoming?
Why was life so unfair?
▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔
A week went by and Izuku wouldn’t return to school. He would just stare up at
his ceiling, knuckles tightly wrapped in gauze with a blank stare as he laid
there on his bed. Izuku would get up for food, bathroom, and other necessaries
but other than that he was just a haunting ghost. He wouldn’t talk to his
mother, he wouldn’t go on the computer to watch all might, he wouldn’t get
dressed, he wouldn’t do anything but stare off to space.
And that was truly worrisome for his mother. She didn’t know what caused this
sudden change in his baby boy, and she tried. God did she try to figure out
what happened, what hurt, who, but to no avail. It got to the point where she
had to go, leave the house for awhile, just a few hours to hang out with
Mitsuki Bakugo. She needed to get this off her chest, and as she saw her son
sitting there, blank expression and all just staring off to the distance on the
couch she weeped.
She was losing her son.
▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔
Finally his mother was gone. He couldn’t be in this suffocating house no
longer, he needed to leave. And leave he did. T-shirt with shorts, messy hair,
obvious bags under his eyes that izuku could really care less about with his
hands covered in gauze. He looked like he felt, a mess. So izuku did the one
thing that could help, he walked.
Walked and walked till finally he came to a spot he didn’t recognize
whatsoever. It was woodsy, trees blooming everywhere, flowers of different
colors. In the middle was a decaying playset that looked like nobody has played
on it for years. It was truly beautiful to izuku. Stepping over a flower he
walked up to the old swing, and sat down. Sure it wasn’t his smartest move but
it only creaked and not break.
He didn’t swing. Just sat there on the swing, looking up at the sky as he
listen to the wind speak words he couldn’t hear or understand. Izuku felt at
home, felt at peace. It didn’t last long however. For the memories of what all
might said to him a week prior to now still stung him, shocked him through the
core.
You were always a nobody just never opened your eyes deku!
A voice that sounded an awful lot like Kaachan but really was his own voice
mocked at him. When did he get so self deprecating?
Oh wait you do have a quirk! It’s called the being worthless quirk
The voice kept taunting at him. And he believed the voice in his head. He was
as worthless as Kaachan said he was. Feeling a drop of water shocked him out of
his dark thoughts, making even the voice quiet. Seeing the sky that had turned
dark with clouds of anger and sorrow, izuku laughed bitterly. The weather was
sympathising with izuku, how fucking perfect was that.
And as the rain slowly rained, getting harder and harder before it came down in
forces. Izuku sat on the swing, in the middle of the woods where nobody knew
where he was at and he was truly alone, izuku cried loudly in the rain.
The rain was crying with him, it’s anger loudly rang like he wished his anger
could. And if izuku screamed out curses as he sobbed, well it was nobodies
business but izuku.
Even if he was alone crying in the rain.
Maybe it was because he was upset, angry and that was why life decided to give
him a comfort. So as he raged on, coming down in downpours izuku sat on the
swing soaked to the bone as he cried.
Izuku’s only wish that maybe life would keep being nice and give him a quirk to
show everyone he could be a hero. It, however, never gave him one. So he went
and got one. But that was a different story for a different day.
He only wanted to be a hero.
▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔
Standing in front of the door was Izuku Midoriya. The droplets of rain started
dripping from his green curls as it fell flat against his temple from being
outside in the gloomy, grey weather. Shivering; Izuku's hands trembled as he
was searching around his pockets for the keys, feeling the icily breeze
sweeping through the doors. His blue lips quivering from the coldness, the bags
underneath his eyes black from the emptiness of feelings.Seeing his mother not
back from Kaachan’s house he sighed in relief, he didn’t want his mom seeing
him like this or worried. Which funnily enough he didn’t care earlier. The rain
had helped.
Izuku was still in autopilot however as he slowly walked to the bathroom,
stepping into the shower, fully clothed, as he turned on the boiling hot water.
He didn’t make a noise when ice cold water hit him, but he did flinch slightly
before feeling the hotness come on. He stood there resting his head on the
tiles of the wall in the shower, mind in a blank fuze.
Hearing the front door open then shut Izuku tilted his head before something
clicked in his head, someone was here. But who? Was it his mother? He can’t
tell how long he was in the shower but seeing his hands prune up badly told
him, he was in here for awhile. Stepping out the shower izuku grimace at the
feeling of wet socks, yuck.
Feeling as that something was off he walked over to the door, turning off the
light before taking off his shoes and socks. If it was someone breaking in he
doesn’t want them to know he was home or where he was at. So he set his shoes
aside and began walking down the hallway quietly. Izuku felt like all the
waterdrops could be heard, but he was being paranoid or antsy either or.
Moving his head before the corner to look slightly he moved more so he could
see, and there was his mom and Kaachan’s mother. Izuku sighed in relief.
“He hasn’t been the same since last week, something- something happened to
him.” he could hear his mother exclaim to Kaachan’s mother. Causing izuku to
stop what he was doing in going to his bedroom and to listen.
He knew it was bad to listen in on a conversation that he wasn’t apart of, but
it gave him an excuse to say it was about him so why not.
“Inko- you need to relax and breathe. He could have had a fight with Katsuki
again” Kaachan’s mother sighed out.
No, if it was a fight with Kaachan he would have forgiven him already and not
be in this sort of mess. It wasn’t a healthy relationship, Izuku knew this, but
he felt like deep down Kaachan actually still cared and would change. He
didn’t.
So Izuku stopped listening in on the mothers, and walked to his bedroom. He
didn’t want to hear about shit he couldn’t explain to his mother, shit that he
should have known would happen.
Maybe his mind was just as worthless as him. It would explain a lot.
Looking at the mirror in his room he saw himself, or what looked like himself.
It was the shell of himself, nothing else. And wasn’t that haunting. He was
there, but his spirit, himself wasn’t. Maybe he should have listen to Kaachan’s
advice and off himself, it would have stopped a lot of heartache.
He’s at fault
The voice spat out causing Izuku to jump before laughing bitterly, yeah right.
It is him, he should be taught a lesson. He has been picking on us since
forever and we’ve been nothing but kind to that bastard!
Like he could teach Kaachan a lesson, but….it does have a point in him-er them
being nice to him.
Who gave him the right to pick on us? If there wasn’t any quirks he would be
nothing but a blond idiot.
Let's kill him. Let me kill him please! Pleasepleaseplease! I will make it
painful too, show him all the pain he caused us.
Will you shut up you idiot!
Make me!
Covering his ears with both hands over both ears, izuku fell to the floor.
These voices were loud, prominent...and...him. But why won’t they shut up, just
shut up!
Look at him, he can’t handle us talking! Ha what a baby
He is us, you nitwit
Again what a baby, should I take control?
No.
Make it stop. Please for the love of god make it stop, stop talking, stop
everything, just fucking stop. Izuku was panicking he knew this, he knew he
needed to breathe these voices weren’t real, he was mad at the world so his
thoughts run while, they weren’t real.
Oh we’re real alright, just as real as you Izuku~ or should I call you deku?
Standing up Izuku put his palms against the wall as he leaned against his arms.
He knows how to shut them up. Bringing his head back, pausing in only a second
before bringing his head down against the wall. Over and over till black dots
started to dance across his vision, and he did it once more.
Than it was nothing but darkness, darkness and quiet. Such blissful quiet.
Haha, we won’t leave that easily deku~ we’ll be here when you wake up though.
“Izuku!”
***** gentle fingers on the trigger *****
Chapter Notes
     Sorry for the long wait! here is chapter two or three but whatever! I
     read your guys reviews almost always because I need motivation. Now
     my warnings are on the very first chapter so read those, but I will
     put them up again on later chapters. This story isn't for the light
     hearted and some pictures I may use can be triggering so fair warning
     right now. My stories are dark, or at least try to be dark, so please
     be safe.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
All over the news were images of a young middle school boy with curly hair,
green, and freckles on his cheeks. A smile, one that can outshine the sun
itself was on the young boys face. The young boy was called Midoriya Izuku, a
young lad who had his whole life ahead of him however- he was missing. Been
missing since Last Friday night when he vanished from his hospital bed. His
face was on almost all news channels, his disappearance leaving many confused
and scared for their own children. Police searched for forty six hours straight
but, they were giving up on Izuku actually being alive when they find him, well
if they find him.
He had so much life ahead of him. 
Stop being so over dramatic Izuku-chan! you have us! plus you left willingly~ 
Ah- there was the voice that Izuku didn't miss whatsoever. Making sure his
hoodie covered his face and head fully he finally left the TV's that were
showing the news in the store they were in. He didn't have time to just stand
and watch the news talk about him, talk about him like they all knew him. Half
the people that are worried and sorry for the young 'izuku' were faking it and
people he never even met. People just wanted attention- constant attention. 
They- or we are all fucking assholes to our own kind, I mean look at your best
friend deku."
Biting his bottom lip he struggled to keep the voices from actually provoking
him this time, he didn't want another melt down, especially one in public those
were for private affairs. Walking more down the busy streets of downtown, Izuku
noticed a young man with two different colors for hair, and a scar over his
right eye. Looked painful, must have been. But as they passed one another Izuku
didn't even flinch or blink, the boy was a stranger, nobody to him. 
The boy didn't care about him, neither did he to the boy. 
Izuku wanted to die, he needed to die, his life was slowly losing meaning. Why
fight for something that not even your own fucking hero, the one you look up to
see's you worth fighting for. It fucking sucks. His once hero he looked up to
was nothing more but a liar, a person who lied about anyone can be a hero. If
anyone, why couldn't he? 
Because your quirkless, useless! a worthless deku, deku!
The voices weren't wrong, he just wished they didn't speak the hard truth when
they were in his head. Weren't they suppose to be there for him? if so, they
sucked at their own fucking job. He is losing it, Izuku is officially losing
it. Talking to himself about the voices in his head doing their job right, wow
how fucked up can you be.
He just needed to get back to-
"Izuku-chan~" 
Oh Toga.
"Hello Toga-san, didn't I tell you not to call me by my name?" 
He wasn't annoyed, no matter how much his dull hoarse voice may come out as
such.
"You did, I just don't listen!"
"Of course you didn't."
Her energy would have been great for the old Izuku, but the new one- didn't or
couldn't handle her. He couldn't handle her, well barely anyway, now. He just
wanted two minutes, than life could pull the trigger on him.
His life was already falling apart as is.
Chapter End Notes
     Just because I write it doesn't mean I condone it. sorry if my story
     is short
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
their work!