Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/3510413.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Major_Character_Death, Underage
  Category:
      F/F, F/M, M/M
  Fandom:
      Shingeki_no_Kyojin_|_Attack_on_Titan
  Relationship:
      Marco_Bott/Jean_Kirstein, Jean_Kirstein/Male_Character(s)
  Character:
      Jean_Kirstein, Marco_Bott, Eren_Jaeger, Armin_Arlert, Mikasa_Ackerman,
      Shingeki_no_Kyojin_Ensemble
  Additional Tags:
      Angst, Smut, Fluff, Death, Depression, Titans, Spoilers, Not_Really
      Character_Death, Established_Relationship, AU, headcannon, Top_Marco
      Bott, Bottom_Jean_Kirstein, Top_Jean_Kirstein, Switch_Jean_Kirstein
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-03-09 Updated: 2015-05-22 Chapters: 3/? Words: 3963
****** The Gentle Titan (Temporarily Discontinued) ******
by h311agay
Summary
     Jean and Marco make a promise to spend the rest of their lives
     together in the interior but after unforeseen events, Jean is left
     alone and in the Survey Corps. During an expedition gone horribly
     wrong, Jean believes himself to be a goner. He is, however, saved by
     the strangest thing, a Titan.
Notes
     Chapter Summary: The 104th cadets are celebrating the fact that they
     are graduating soon. With rankings known and alcohol slipped into
     drinks, spirits are high and romance blossoms. In other words, have
     some Jean x Marco fluff and smut~ However, I haven't been in the mood
     to write hardcore smut so it's like... watered down smut. Sorry.
     I suggest listening to the song that I'll have linked at the
     beginning of each chapter because that's how they got their names.
***** Fall For You *****
Fall_For_You--_Second_Hand_Serenade
The stars filled the inky blackness above, swirling designs telling stories
that no one would ever be able to read. So ancient, so knowing, the stars. Even
now, they recorded the history of the world. Only they knew how the walls were
erected, why, when. The stars held all the knowledge that humanity could only
dream about. They knew where the oceans were, how life had been before the
Titans. So powerful, so beautiful. They knew everything, even the smallest of
things. Only they knew that the two cadets were sneaking off into the storage
shed, hands clasped and stifled giggles exchanged between them. Only the stars
knew that the boys would make love tonight and come stumbling from the cabin
before the morning rays of the sun could lift into the sky, sending the stars
to slumber.
Jean laughed as he tripped over an unseen object on the floor of the shed, dust
stirring in the air and making him cough slightly. He clutched onto Marco, his
cheeks flushed and hair messy as he pulled the taller boy down for a sloppy,
smiling kiss. A chuckle brushed over the younger cadet's lips as Marco kissed
Jean back. They shuffled back against a wall, the rough wood catching on Jean's
shirt. The blonde pulled away, eyes wide and shining. He laughed again,
clasping his hands behind Marco's neck. "I love you," he breathed, smiling in
the darkness. Marco's breath hitched and he grabbed Jean's face, pulling him in
for another kiss. Jean could feel the dumb smile against his lips. His cheeks
burnt where Marco's fingers pressed into them.
He pulled from the kiss, ducking away from Marco's reach and began to strip,
letting the slight, silver light from the moon that slivered through a
partially covered window be the only thing that exposed his body to Marco. He
could feel the other's eyes on him, drinking him in and he giggled again,
intoxicated and dizzy with glee. It seemed crazy that earlier, he had been
upset about ranking beneath Eren. Now, he was beginning to wonder why that was
ever important to him. Nothing was important to him as the hungry expression on
Marco's face as Jean stood naked before him. The older cadet stripped as well,
tugging Jean back to his chest and kissing him. Soft sounds filled the cabin as
their kisses grew heated and fueled by lust. Marco held Jean close, careful not
to push him against the wall too roughly.
Jean pulled from the kiss, grabbing one of Marco's hands and lifting it up to
his mouth, tongue flicking out to lick the fingers. Marco watched with
fascination as Jean soaked his fingers with his saliva, lips stretching over
his digits and his tongue snaking between them. Jean felt his face heat up when
Marco let out a soft moan as he slathered the other's fingers. Eventually, he
pulled his mouth off, his breathing slightly laboured. "Please," he choked out,
guiding Marco's fingers down towards his entrance. He felt one snake in, his
legs wobbling suddenly. Marco used his free arm to lift Jean up, telling him to
wrap his legs around him. Jean did so, hiding his face in Marco's neck and
panting as he was fingered. His eyes were shut yet the world still spun behind
his lids. 
Before long, Jean's heart was hammering and Marco was pulling his fingers from
within his lover. "Are you ready?"
"Y-Yeah," he mumbled, blunt fingernails digging into the other's freckled skin.
He gasped loudly in the darkness as Marco pushed in.
They were slow and languid, their sounds muffled by each other's mouths. The
taste of sweat in their kisses and ever-building fire in their stomachs was all
they could ever wish for. Jean's toes curled and he threw his head back, a
cracked moan resounded through the shed as Jean felt his sanity slipping. "M-
Marco, I'm-- ngh. I'm close," he panted, body shaking in the other's arms. A
few more thrusts, Jean came, tight muscles contracting around Marco's member
and pushing the other male over the edge. 
Despite how Marco's legs shook and trembled, he didn't slide down the wall, but
instead leaned against it more. He let out a shaky laugh, the warm air
fluttering over Jean's neck. "I love you, Jean," he breathed, words slow and
muffled to Jean's ears. He could feel the other smile against his skin.
"I know; I love you too. I love you as endlessly as your freckles."
Marco laughed again, pulling away to look Jean in the eyes, a bright blush
crossing his cheeks and causing his dark freckles to pop out even more. "Jean,
shut up," he ordered weakly, still smiling. "I'm gonna pull out now, so be
ready." As he spoke, he removed himself from Jean who let out a shaky breath.
He stood on trembling legs as they searched for their discarded clothing,
coughing slightly whenever one of them stirred too much dust. 
"I'm gonna need a shower, Marco," Jean admitted, his ears going red as he
blushed. "So tired, though. You should come with me, clean me off."
Marco threw Jean's shirt at him with a giggle. "You just want me to blow you,"
he pointed out to Jean as he pulled his arm through his sleeve. "I'll shower
with you but no more sex or anything like that. It's late and we have a big day
tomorrow. Bigger than we can even imagine." He scooped Jean up, stepping back
into the silver light of outside as Jean looked around, struggling in Marco's
arms. 
"Put me down you big, smiling oaf!" He laughed as Marco set him back down. They
made their way to the showers to clean up and spend a few more moments together
before retiring to their cabin to sleep.
Above, the stars watched, smiled, and cried. Little did Jean and Marco know,
despite their promises of forever, they had very little time left to be
together.
***** Take Me With You *****
Chapter Notes
     Shit! I'm soo sorry for taking so long to get this out to you all.
     Also, I'd like to apologise to any of you for the confusion with
     publishing this chapter. I meant to save it as a draft and
     accidentally posted it otherwise! It was not finished. But this
     version is indeed completed!
     Lots of smut ahead, but stick with it because there is *gasp*
     CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT in this one. ^^
Take_Me_With_You--_Secondhand_Serenade
 
Marco's head was resting on the blonde's shoulder, their backs pressed against
a cold, mosaic-like wall of stone. They sat mostly in the shade, only the ends
of their leather-clad legs sticking out into the sunlight. Jean's head was
heavy with the lazy heat of the afternoon and he stumbled over his tongue a few
times as he told Marco of his childhood here in Trost. "It wasn't the best,
especially whenever other kids began to find out I was... ya' know?" Marco
nodded against the other's shoulder, watching people walk by, a few giving them
inquisitive stares. Jean fought against his squirming stomach and attempted to
ignore them, positive most of the faces remembered and recognized him. "They
would make fun of me a lot and make me upset just to be rude." He grabbed
Marco's hand and squeezed it.
"Not a lot of the adults here ever stood up for me either. I was- am- just a
kid and they all stood by while I was ridiculed and sometimes even beat. I was
only twelve when this all started," he admitted.
"Not even your mother? Is that why you're so... abrasive towards her?" Marco's
voice was soft, treading carefully.
The younger boy shook his head. "No, I mean, my mother loves me. She always
protected me and defended me. She always stood up for me. I guess-- I guess I'm
like this towards her because I'd rather she hated me, you understand what I
mean? I'm always gonna do something that's gonna upset her, make her worry for
my safety and my health. That's one reason I swore to never go into the Survey
Corps; what if my mother never hates me and I die on her? I'm all she has left.
I don't mean to hurt her but in a way, it's my own mechanism for defense. I
don't want to see my mother cry anymore than she already has." Jean's heart
jumped when Marco's warm breath floated over his neck.
"You're a good person, Jean."
"Yeah," he muttered weakly as the sun bore down on the streets still. "We
should probably getting heading to the base. Lunch'll be served soon and if we
miss it, we'll have to find a way to buy our own." He scrambled to his feet,
holding out his hand for Marco to lift himself up with. "I'm excited, Marco.
Two days and we head to the interior. Fine dining and no dying." Marco's hand
was soft and warm in Jean's.
Marco let out a laugh, his freckles standing out against slightly pink cheeks.
"That's awful, Jean! don't say something like that," he weakly ordered Jean,
trying to stifle his laughter. They raced down the streets of Trost back to the
barracks where they were staying. Jean ran in the lead, his knowledge of the
streets giving him an advantage above Marco. He back-trailed often to make sure
Marco kept up with him. The reached the barracks, sweaty and panting under the
unforgiving sun. "Jean, do you think, when we live in the interior, that you
can cook for me?"
Jean's skin jumped at the question as he opened the door. "Uh, yeah. Sure.
Why?"
"Well, last night, during the competition that Pixis made you and Sasha compete
in, I kept thinking to myself 'Wow, Jean's omelet smells so good.'" He smiled,
standing close to the other cadet. His smile dropped some with nerves as they
sat down at their table. "Think we can head up to the bunks whenever we're done
eating? I'm tired."
Jean nodded his head, embarrassed by the fact that Marco had complemented his
cooking skills, before shoveling some food into his mouth.
Lunch passed with no incident and the pair began to head up to the dorms,
hoping that no one else would be there. Jean's spirits rose when he opened the
old wooden door to an entirely desolate room. He turned and locked the door,
knowing it would do no good if someone really wanted to get in. Marco grabbed
his wrists, fingers fire against Jean's skin, and pinned them above his head.
The younger male groaned when their lips made contact, sparks and hot lava
coursing through him.
Marco ravished his mouth before pulling away and nudging Jean's jaw. Jean's
skin crawled with anticipation as he craned his head back and allowed Marco to
taste him. Soon, the Trost Native was panting and squirming between Marco and
the cool wall. "Please," he gasped out in desperation, his hands knotting into
fists above him. Marco obliged, dropping to his knees, relinquishing his hold
on Jean's wrists, and began to undo Jean's trousers. Once he had freed the
other's throbbing erection, he wrapped a large, slightly calloused hand around
it.
Jean felt something explode in his body, every nerve was suddenly on alert and
tense. He groaned lowly, eyes fluttering half shut, when Marco's soft lips
wrapped around the head of his cock. "F-Fuck," he stuttered, long fingers
tangling themselves into Marco's hair. He struggled with his composure as he
felt Marco's slick, hot tongue swirl around his shaft and tease at his slit and
frenulum. His cheeks were painted red as if he had been out under the sun for
hours. "M-Marco--" he choked out, hips canting forward some as Marco took in
more of his girth.
Marco hummed around Jean's cock, his brown eyes gleaming deviously and staring
up at Jean. He popped off, leaving Jean unfulfilled and panting for more-
- please. "C'mon," Marco ordered huskily, beginning to remove his clothing and
pointing to the bed. "I'd much rather my cock in your ass than your cock in my
mouth." Jean groaned as Marco pushed him back onto the bed, groin throbbing and
heart pounding. Marco's words had struck a chord in him, making Jean desperate.
People who had discovered their relationship often thought that Marco was the
submissive one. They couldn't have been more wrong. Jean crawled onto the bed,
shoving off his clothes, and whining for Marco to make him feel good.
The older cadet slowly stripped as he took careful steps over to Jean's bunk,
breathing slow and controlled. He slid between Jean's legs, running his rough
fingers over the other's sensitive thighs. He put them to Jean's mouth and
ordered, "Suck." Jean took them in eagerly, wrapping his lips and tongue around
them. He groaned in anticipation, feeling his cock twitch and throb in
excitement.
---
Jean was panting against Marco's chest, his body numb and loose with the
euphoria that accompanied the after-shocks of an orgasm. "Blue." Jean startled
slightly, turning his head up to look at Marco who had a sad smile on his face.
Marco looked down at him and the smile softened to something sweeter. "My
favourite colour, it's blue. Blue like the sky. My mother used to tell me that
it was her favourite colour because she could look up there whenever she missed
my dad and knew that he was seeing the same sky. The same blue sky. I slowly
adopted her same view and when I joined the Cadet Corps, I made sure to tell
her the same thing. That whenever she was missing me, to look up at the sky and
know that I saw the same thing she did."
Jean was at a loss for words. It was almost comical, with how much he was in
love with Marco, that he knew so little about the other cadet. "Blue? Mine's
orange. Like the sun." Marco hummed at this and Jean felt like an idiot for not
having some deep, meaningful story on why it was his favourite; it simply was.
"I like orange."
Jean bite his cheek, wanting to ask Marco a slew of questions now that he
realised he was in bed with a total stranger. "You said you wanted to go into
the interior to protect the king," he whispered, remembering their beginning
days of training. "I said I wanted to live safe and cozy. Do you still want to
protect the king? I still want to live safe, but I don't think I could live
cozy without you," he admitted.
"Yes, I still want to protect the king. But, living with you would be a lot
better than anything." Marco rolled over top of Jean, kissing at his jawline
slowly and languidly. "I love you, Jean. I really love you and it would be the
best thing ever to live with you."
Jean smiled, a flutter of air passing out his lips at the kisses. He let his
eyes flicker shut. "Marco, if we could, would you marry me?"
Marco ceased his movements, his body still and warm above Jean. The younger
cadet opened his eyes in worry to see Marco smiling down at him, a hot blush
across his cheeks and making his freckles appear darker. "Jean, if we could, I
would marry you," he answered.
***** The Last Song Ever *****
Chapter Notes
     Can I just apologise for taking so freaking long to update this? I
     have had the worst writer's block for this story that I've ever had.
     I finally got you chapter three!
     Do forgive me for taking forever.
     Again, I recommend listening to the song I post with the chapter.
The_Last_Song_Ever--_Secondhand_Serenade
 
 
Jean pushed his hair back from his face, squinted eyes peering over the
rooftops, a shaking hand blocked the afternoon sun from his face. His heart
beat hollowly as he listened to the echoing screams of the people he grew up
with, with the cadets he trained with. Marco landed on the roof next to him,
wrapping his arms around him and pressing Jean’s pale face to his chest. “We’ll
be okay, Jean,” he muttered.
Jean nodded, swallowing before pulling away from Marco, hopping to see a
comforting smile plastered on his dotted face. His eyes widened when he saw
nothing but true terror in those chocolate eyes, Marco’s brown hair was
plastered to his face. Jean realised that Marco hadn't just spoken those words
for the benefit of Jean, but to try and convince his own self. “Yeah, Marco,
we’ll be fine. Gonna kick some Titan butts and make our way into the interior
as renowned war heroes!” He looked along the brown rooftops of Trost once more
before turning to his squad.
He felt his breath falter as he shot his cords forward, wanting nothing more
than to return to the mold-scented barracks that the cadets were staying at
while they waited for their recruitment. It wasn't fair. Two more days and Jean
knew that he and Marco could be peacefully resting in the interior, preparing
for their Military Police training. It wasn't fair that his hometown was being
attacked. His friends had already been killed. his heart ached. Where was his
mom? Was she safe? He wished he could have seen her one last time before the
Titan attack. He wanted to apologise to her for being such a jerk son.
There is was. Jean snapped back into reality as a Titan came into view; the
ugly thing was reaching for a girl who was cowering behind a set of carts
filled with vegetables. Jean recognised the child as his next door neighbour's
little girl. He swung in her direction just as the Titan scooped her up and
began to bring its hand to its face. Jean yelled out, slicing its wrist and
causing it to drop the little girl. He caught her, and swung away. She squirmed
in his arms, crying and screaming. He hit the rooftops, hard, and listened as
the Titan let out a dying scream and fell. Someone must have taken care of it.
He rolled along the hard, shingled roof, clutching his neighbour tight in his
arms. The finally stopped and Jean was sore and hurting everywhere. The little
girl had stopped screaming but was sniffling in his arms. Marco landed on the
roof right next to Jean and crouched down. "Jean?" He asked, worried.
"M'kay," Jean breathed, rubbing the little girl's hair. She was safe. Jean
saved her. His heart was thudding wildly and he couldn't quite breath
correctly, but it was alright. He saved the girl.
"I'll take her to the gates to get her through; I have plenty of gas." Marco
offered, holding his arms out for her. Jean just nodded and let her go. "I'll
meet you back at HQ, alright?"
"Y-Yeah. Just. Don't die," the ordered could have been perceived as a joke, but
Jean was serious. He couldn't lose Marco. Anyone but Marco. He looked up to him
and saw that he had been crying. Was still crying.
Marco smiled though, a small laugh escaping him. It seemed choked. "Of course
not.I gotta get her to her family ad then you and I gotta get to the interior
and eat some diamonds."
Jean licked his lips, wanting nothing more than to kiss Marco right now. All he
did, instead, was pat him on the shoulder after standing up. "Yeah. See you in
a little bit." His eyes watered as he watched Marco shoot his cords off towards
the gates, knowing that this could be the last time he would ever see him
again. He shoved his worries aside and turned to his remaining unit. "Come one!
No time to waste. We need to get to HQ and replenish our gas supplies or we'll
become Titan chow."
He turned and began to race along the rooftops.
 
===============================================================================
 
Jean shuffled down the cobbled streets of his hometown, phantoms of his
childhood and of a day not too long ago flashing before him. He swallowed down
bile and tears as he passed yet another crystalised sac of blood and bodies.
Once, he had played there, him and his friends laughing and screeching like the
children that were. Three days ago, he had sat there with Marco in the hot sun
of Trost, nothing but their shoes sticking out into the sun. He turned away,
not wanting to know which of his friends, both Trost natives and cadets, were
cramped into that ball. It was beginning to become difficult to breath beneath
the white cloth tied around his face, but the struggle was far better than
breathing in the slowly falling grey ash of the deceased that fluttered down to
the ground under his feet like the snow of the damned.
Two days had passed since the initial attack on Trost, all the civilians had
been exported further within Wall Rose. Trost was no longer inhabitable. Jean
wondered if that little girl's mother had even still been alive. He wondered
about his own mother.
All of the Titans had been dealt with and neutralised, but until all the dead
had been burned and the possibility for an epidemic had been cleared, people
were not allowed to return within the Trost District. Unfortunately for Jean,
that meant he had to wait even longer before being sent to Wall Sina. He and
Marco could have been there already, sipping wine and eating crystals or
whatever it was the rich people within the interior did, if the Titans hadn’t
attacked when they did. Only if they had waited just a few more hours.
Two days had passed since Jean had last seen Marco. Every dark haired, male
body made Jean’s heart leap into his throat. It was awful, but every time, he
begged “Please be someone else,” and every time, it was. The blonde knew he was
being irrational, Marco couldn’t possibly be dead. Not him. Marco wasn’t
capable of dying young.
That’s when Jean’s worried, golden eyes landed on him. Jean’s body stopped
moving, frozen in place in the middle of the bloodied street that he and Marco
had been walking down with smiles on their faces only days earlier. He let out
a breath, his eyes becoming wet and body shaking. He wanted to run, to throw
himself at Marco but his body refused to move. But, God, he ached to hold
Marco.
And there he was. Sitting on the cobble streets, his back against the stone
wall. Marco, as perfect as the sun. Marco as happy as someone could physically
be. His mouth was turned down and his eyes were empty. So unlike Marco
Marco was dead.
The entire right side of his torso had been chomped and devoured, a dark red
plasma oozed from him, caking his exposed bones and the ashy ground beneath
him. His organs spilled onto the street and lay limp in a pool of drying fluids
within his body.
The sun was hot. Too hot. Jean felt his head spin and his knees went weak in
the heat of Trost. “Is… Is that… Marco?”
A medic appeared her grey eyes wide and empty, as if she had seen this scene
unfold thousands of times. “If you have a name for this one, it would be
helpful to pass it along.”
“I wondered where he was,” he whimpered, ignoring the nurse all together. “But
he’s. He’s not the sorta guy who, you know? Marco…”He turned back to the body,
eyes terrified. “What happened? No-- Somebody saw it, had to of. Somebody knows
how he went out."
“I need his name; we don’t have time for this,” the nurse barked from beneath
her mask. “Please son,” she implored, her eyes dull. “You understand? It’s been
two days since we’ve boarded up the hole in Wall Rose. That’s too long; we’re
no where near accounting for all the dead. Unless these poor souls are dealt
with soon, epidemic is likely to break out. We’re the first line of defense
against secondary disaster. We’ll amend the fallen after we’ve done our jobs.
Is that understood?”
Jean stood frozen, heart in his throat. “He was a member of the 104th Cadet
Corp. Captain of squad 19. Marco Bodt--”

“Bodt, duly noted then. Thank you cadet,” she interrupted before turning and
walking away. Jean watched her go, his lean body trembling as his eyes rolled
back to Marco’s mutilated corpse.
"Marco..."
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