Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/691175. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Homestuck Relationship: John_Egbert/Dave_Strider Character: John_Egbert, Dave_Strider, Bro_|_Dirk_Strider Additional Tags: Mutual_Masturbation, Masturbation, Hand_Jobs, Alternate_Universe_-_No Sburb_Session Stats: Published: 2013-02-19 Words: 1965 ****** The Fine Art of Masturbation ****** by shlorlock Summary Dave brings up the touchy subject of wanking and discovers that John has never done it before. Dave's then determined to teach him the skill he will probably need to survive the rest of his life. Notes for the kink meme. "I've been hearing some pretty vicious rumors about you, Dave," John laughed, adjusting his glasses on his nose. He was sitting cross legged on Dave's bed, staring down at Dave who was sitting on the floor scoping the screen of his computer. 
"Oh, really? Like what, Egbert? Give me a scoop with rainbow jimmies." 
"Well..." John responded quickly, sliding off the bed and taking a seat beside Dave, "Jade said she heard you hooked up with some chick behind Pancheros." 
"Woah, there. We all know I'm not a Pancheros kind of guy," Dave responded, directing little lines on his screen.
 "I know," John giggled. "It's total bullshit. I haven't seen you even kiss a chick since third grade. And that's not even the absurd part." 
"Then what is, Egbert?"
 "Aren't you like, strictly sausage?" 
"Woah now, don't go spreading that around. No, dude. In your own words, I, too, am not a homosexual. I just don't really care about dealing with chicks. Not just yet. We're 14, John. I don't need to be going shoe shopping on Saturdays. " Dave clicked away at his computer, paying strict attention to the shitty animation. 
 "Well what about, i mean.... sex?" John asked, pushing his glasses up his nose again. 
 "I'm perfectly capable of taking care of that myself," he says slowly, like it was a simple fact. 
 "What do you mean?" John asked. 
"What do you think?" 
 "I don't know, Dave. That's why I asked." 
"Youre going to make me spell it out for you, huh?" Dave replied, turning to John and examining for any hints of sarcasm. "Masturbation, John."
 John was hit with realization and surprise, his cheeks growing pink. 
 "Oh....." was all he could say, at a loss of words. 
 "Don't tell me you've never done it before, Egbert. Thats a new level of dork. Even for you." 
 "I didn't see it in our summer activities list or anything, Dave!" John said defensively. 
 "You're being serious right now, aren't you?" Dave smirked and returned to his work on the computer. John crossed his arms stubbornly and slumped against the bed. 
 "I don't even know how to do it. Don't tease me." 
"Come on, Egbert. It's pretty funny."
 John stared at the floor, pulling his arms apart and expertly twiddling his thumbs. 
 "Dave?" John asks, staring down mixed emotions. 
"Yeah?" 
"Can you show me?" 
 As soon as the words left his mouth, Dave visibly stiffened beside him. His fingers stopped pressing keys and nothing in his face moved. John cursed himself for not deserting his curiosity earlier. Now it was too late, and the blush creeping across both of their faces was horrifying. 
After a few seconds, John repeated his innocent question. 
"Can you show me how?" 
With that, Dave promptly re-adjusted his cool. Flicking his eyes over to John, he said in a low, steady, sheepish voice, 
 "Why?" 
John felt hyper aware of his movements, dropping his hands into his lap and pulling his knees up. He pushed his forehead into his knees, saying in a small, embarrassed voice that was nearly a whisper, 
"I've never done it before. I don't know how." 
 "Its not exactly rocket science," Dave laughed. He could feel the smirk Dave had to choke down while raising his head to peer over at him. John receded cowardly into himself, the heat from his cheeks finding its way to his ears and head. 
Suddenly, he felt a heavy hand laid upon his back, and a sharp inhale from Strider.
"Okay dude. No big deal."
John suddenly felt starved of air, Dave's submission to the whole "teach me how to wank" thing hit him like a bat to the stomach. He looked up frantically, searching for signs of sarcasm in Dave's face, but he just wasn't finding it. "W-What do you mean, you're going to set me up in here and talk me through it behind the door?" John asked, eyes wide and face still heated. "Nah, man. What's the point. I mean, I'll know you'll be doin the deed anyway. What's the point of me leading you through groping your junk unless I get some too?" Dave says, staring in his lap. "N-Nothing, I guess," John sputters, adding quickly, "But isn't that kinda… gay?" "No, this is patrick." "Oh. Okay." Dave sat on his bed, summoning John to sit beside him. Wearily, John picked himself up and sat down beside Dave, fearing his legs would buckle and collapse beneath him. Dave slowly unbuttoned his his pants, taking a deep breath and shooting a glance at John. "Eyes on your own schlong, Egbert. I'm teaching you a skill you're going to need for the rest of your life. Not giving you a show," Dave said, but he had lied right through his teeth. Dave was definitely putting on a show. "I'm going to go slow. It's going to, uh, be kind of overwhelming, your first time..." Dave says, studying Johns face. "Unbutton your pants, cowboy. Mount the masturbation horse." John giggles nervously, whispering to Dave - "Don't watch.." Dave nodded, turning back to his own buisness. He felt the awkwardness seeping up through the floor and getting him at all angles, but he continued, pulling his zipper down and slipping out of bright red skinny jeans. He pushes them to his ankles, staring down at his boxers and skinny legs. 
 "Ready, Egbert?" he looks ahead, trying not to deal with the subconscious knowing that his best friend was beside him, about to have his first sexual experience. It was kind of thrilling - everything about sex was - but the sensuality was overwhelming. 
 "Yes, Dave. It's out. What do I do with this thing..." 
"Shhh," Dave said, grabbing a bottle of unscented moisturizer on his nightstand and passing it to John beside him. "Put it down for a sec, put a sufficient amount of that on your hands. Then you can grab at your joystick again." Dave said, pushing back his waistband and sliding his hand under the fabric of his boxers. He feels his shaft, grasping it and pulling it from the fabric. He gives himself some moisturizer as well, rubbing the lotion up and down his length. "Okay Egbert. Slick it up, okay? Now wrap your hand around it and settle it at the bottom. You're probably not hard yet, but just bear with me, okay?"
 "Yes," he hears a squeak in response. 
 "Take a deep breath. Slowly and carefully just let your hand go up and down y- your dick. Do you feel it?" he keeps his eyes straight. 
"Yeah. D-Dave is it okay if I watch you? I mean...it's kinda...nevermind." he says, the disdain in his voice tragically apparent. Dave sighed in defeat, feeling a cold chill roll over him as Johns eyes re set themselves on Dave's erotic actions. 
"Okay, just copy me," he says, sliding his hand up and down his shaft slowly as it rushes with blood. He lets out a soft sigh of pleasure, letting his thumb linger over his circumcision scar and below the head. A hum started in his throat and John mimicked him. "N-Now, Start focusing on the tip, Okay? Let your thumb slide over it a little when you go up and down. Don't pick up pace just yet.." He says, feeling his warm member twitch slightly in his hands. "John, I'm going to turn to face you…" "What?! No, Why?" John asks frantically and Dave just sighs, hand moving slowly up and down his shaft. "I want to see you." Dave could tell John had practically become a tomato without looking. But Dave really did want to see him. He wanted to see someone's real first orgasm, up close. Every emotion and muscle that tenses and releases as it happens. After a moment, John softly responds. "Okay." Dave's breath hitches in his throat as he shifts his position, staring eye to eye with his best friend with his cock in his hand. He maintained eye contact, picking up speed with his hand and watching John's eyes fall to what Dave was doing, then slowly close and flutter back open. Dave's eyes fell to John's hands, gliding swiftly over his surprisingly impressive length. Beads of precum already welled up in John's slit, his breath picking up with drawn out whimpers. Dave moaned softly, trying to keep his volume down, staring at the pink cheeked boy sitting on the bed in front of him. "John.." Dave said, looking at the boy. "Keep going… J-Just watch me." Dave looks up at him through his eyelashes, shades having fallen off. He laid back, sliding his other hand into his pants and alternating between thumbing his head and stroking his balls while moving his hands up and down his shaft, rolling his hips into the motion. He got more and more vocal, bucking up into his hand. His head was laid to the side, watching John as he steamed with arousal, nearing the edge. Dave's hands moves expertly, turning slightly at the tip of the shaft and running a thumb quickly over the precum accumulating in his tip. His mouth hung open, sexy, illegal sounds finding their way out of his throat as he rolled his hips. He felt raw and exposed - the thrill of knowing John was, in a way, getting off to him, was enveloping him in this comfort that was carrying him closer and closer to orgasm. His toes bunched up then extended, now watching the ceiling, the climax finally being reached.His cock pulsed in his hands, his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water - cum pushing out in thick ropes across his legs. He was shuddering as it died down, gulping down the experience and taking deep, long inhales. His head fell back to the sides, flush slowly fading from his cheeks as he watched John's hand moving slowly up and down his shaft. Dave kind doubted John had took any of his directions, sitting up slowly and pulling his black-and-white checkered boxers back up to his waist. John had, no doubt, been watching him, as the strained mutters forming under his breath sounded suspiciously like Dave's name. The blonde boy scoots back beside the other, wrapping his hand slowly around John's and guiding it quicker and quicker up and down John's shaft. John began to lose control immediately, so Dave moved on to running his thumb roughly under the John's head. The skin of John's dick felt so soft and velvety, but was warm and quivering under Dave's touch. His other hand falling to John's thighs, leaving soft trails as he brought his hands closer to John's festive sack of jewels. He watched John carefully, noticing his breath becoming shallower and picking up intense speed. Dave gave John's balls a light squeeze, feeling as John began the ascent into the flash of heat and a warm, overwhelming pulsing sensation that sent  shivers and deep, bone shattering waves of pleasure. John's precum was already dripping down his hands. It didn't take much longer for John to cum, legs kicking out in all different directions as he shuddered, whining Dave's name. His back arched, tossing his head back and hitting it on the wall, like a fucking dork. John had quite the load release, soaking Dave's sheets with manjuice. Dave smiled as John sat there, soaking in the aftermath. He leaned in and reluctantly kissed John's cheek, pulling his underwear back on for him and placing his hand on John's thigh. Suddenly, the door opened slowly, and Bro peeked his head in, drinking a slushy. "Everyone okay in here?" He laughed, winking at Dave and shutting the door. John and Dave erupted into giggles, falling back on the bed and whispering to each other about how to cover it up. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!