Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/12258705.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Yuri!!!_on_Ice_(Anime)
  Relationship:
      Jean-Jacques_Leroy/Otabek_Altin
  Character:
      Jean-Jacques_Leroy, Otabek_Altin
  Additional Tags:
      Jjbek, Sex_in_Church, Oral_Sex, restroom_sex, handjobs, Fingering,
      sleeping_bag_frottage, Frottage, shower_blowjobs, Bad_boy_Otabek, Angst,
      Hurt/Comfort
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-10-03 Words: 3010
****** Sweet Jean ******
by Blownwish
Summary
     He felt like he belonged to Otabek.
Notes
     notgneissatall gave me two jjbek prompts: church sex and sex in a
     tent on church grounds. Fingering and stuff. Plus the last scene is
     sort of based on a jjbek dj from the "19 year old club" set.
     Might I humbly recommend you play "Sweet Jane," performed by the
     Cowboy Junkies, while you read?
     https://youtu.be/BHRFZFmEq9o
The last thing JJ expected was for Otabek to put his hand on his thigh when
Father Dubois kissed Christ’s feet during the Adoration of the Cross, and the
last thing he needed was the boner it gave him when Otabek curled his fingers
around it and stroked his knee with his thumb. JJ tried moving his leg, just to
give a hint. Otabek just squeezed hard, hard enough to leave bruises.
Tabernac!They were sitting right behind JJ's parents and all his brothers and
sisters! If one of them turned around, if one of them actually turned their
heads for once and saw -
JJ is glad they're on the back of the chapel. He's glad it doesn't make too
many heads turn when he gets up. When he rushes to the single stall family
toilet next to St Philip’s solemn wooden doors, and he's even more glad because
it's empty and he's careful to softly shut it and so, so grateful for the tap
water running in the top-low, porcelain sink and oh so happy they never made
this a multi-stall restroom. He's only half hard, now. He doesn't have to jerk
it, he can just count to ten and think about practice. Think about morning runs
in the snow. Think about Papa making him do a hundred sit ups after dinner,
when he gets out of hand and takes the Lord’s name in vain at the table. Count
to ten and imagine the pain. Count to ten and picture his father's angry face.
Count to ten and make it go away. It's like trig or quad Salchow. It's a
rosary. A five am jog. All it takes is a little effort. A little try and he's
got it in the bag.
He expects the knock, and he knows who's knocking. “Jean.” No one calls him
that. No one but him.
“Out in a sec.” His wrists are under the cold tap but it's not working.
There's a soft clack against the wooden door. “You sick? Should I get your
mother?”
“No.” She wouldn't come, anyway. Lorraine is sleeping on her lap, and she
wouldn't want to wake a toddler up in church. JJ closes his eyes. “Not - please
don't bother her.” Otabek knows how to play to win.
“Let me in. You don't sound good.”
He laughs because it sounds so sincere. He pulls the latch and the door is
closed as soon as it's opened. “Hey.” He keeps the tap on. He shrugs. He
smiles. “Just taking a piss. Not sick.” He was about to say something else and
forgot as Otabek rubbed his thumb against his cheek.
“Then piss.”
JJ's jacket is too small. He's had another growth spurt and Papa doesn't have
the money to buy him another, if he wants to keep getting rink time and
competitions and skate costumes. It's tearing around the armpits and he can't
bend his elbows when Otabek crowds him between the changing table and sink. He
just presses his back against the wall as Otabek leans against the wall and
looks JJ up and down, like he's an Easter Sunday sugar pie. “I don't see you
pissing, Jean.”
“I, uh…” He's got a full fledged boner in pants Maman had to let out too many
times to hand down to Alain Jr. They're too tight around the crotch and the
tiny jacket can't hide how hard he is. He just laughs nervously as Otabek
reaches down. As Otabek cups him over the pants. As Otabek tugs at his balls
until they feel so heavy and JJ's knees nearly buckle. “Beks?”
He doesn't smile. But the corners of his mouth go up just a little, just enough
to make JJ smile right back because Otabek never smiles and this is so close,
and JJ would do anything to see him smile. “You don't need to piss. But you do
need something.”
Yeah, he does.
“What kind of friend would I be if I didn't help you, Jean? Hm?” He's touching
JJ's face. His thumb rubs JJ's lips. “We’re friends, right?”
“Yeah.” He keeps his mouth open and the thumb keeps rubbing. “Absolutely.”
“I like being your friend.” Otabek’s pants slip down to his ankles. “I like
helping you.” His boxers, too. And he's hard. So hard and JJ can't help licking
his lips. “I know what you like.”
JJ nods and JJ doesn't need Otabek to push him to his knees and JJ lets him
anyway and JJ doesn't even care if it's near impossible to undo his own fly and
JJ doesn't even think twice when Otabek taps his dick against his cheek and
says, “Go ahead.”
He's never been good at this, no matter how many times they do it, but he tries
his best. Otabek’s cut, and JJ always wonders what it's like to have a dick
without a foreskin to work up and down the head. He looks up as he sucks the
head in his mouth because he wants Otabek to watch him. He touches himself as
Otabek combs his hair back and touches his cheek. He moans as he fists his hair
and thrusts into his mouth.
There's a knock at the door. “Everything okay?” It's Mr Thomas, the head deacon
and Papa’s oldest friend.
“JJ isn't feeling well.” Otabek sounds like he's giving a book report as he
shoves JJ’s head forward. His dick - it's too much and JJ gags and he's tearing
up and he pleads with his - please don't please make him go please let me
breathe please please please, but Otabek isn't letting him up and JJ might
really puke at this rate. “Let Mrs Leroy know I'm taking care of him.” Then he
lets go and he smiles down at JJ and touches his face and the soft shoe shuffle
means Mr Thomas is gone and Otabek really did cool him out. “You okay, Jean?”
JJ never let his dick out of his mouth. He just sucks and jerks himself off and
moves his head and tries to take it all down his throat a couple more times.
He's going to come if Otabek keeps looking down at him like he's a sugar pie.
“So sweet.” Otabek shoves his dick down his throat and JJ is choking as he
keeps shoving it in and out and he's coming and JJ can't swallow he could never
get that come down his throat and he can't breathe at all and come is dribbling
down his chin and it tastes so bad and he's so sorry because he's so bad at
giving head. “Fuck, Jean…”
He pulls JJ up and gives him room so he can spit it the sink and wash his face.
“Sorry.” Otabek rubs his back. “I tried to swallow.”
“Not worried about that.” Otabek's rubbing his ass now. “You still…?” All JJ
can do is nod when his hand comes around. When his fingers wrap around him.
When he pushes Jean over the sink and puts a wet finger between his ass cheeks.
When he starts jerking him off, and that finger --
There's a crucifix on the door. It's Jesus, and Jesus made Confession possible.
But there's no Confession tomorrow. Not the day after Good Friday. Jesus died
today. Jesus died and JJ knows it's okay because he'd do anything for his
friend, even if he doesn't believe and even if he doesn't get it and even if
doesn't even matter. Didn't even matter --
“Beks…” He loves his friend so much. Jesus will understand.
++
“This tent smells like Walmart.”
JJ’s eyes were closed, despite the glare from the LED lantern, despite the fact
that he was burning up under a thermal sleeping bag, despite the hand that kept
moving up and down his bare thigh, despite the fact that Otabek was rubbing his
half hard dick up against his hip, despite the hot breath stirring the hair
around his ear. His little brother was just a few meters away, singing campfire
songs as Sister Marie played guitar.
“I smell the high cost of low prices.” Otabek’s leg hooked around JJ's. “Did
your folks buy this just for you and me, Jean?”
He nodded. “From Plein Air.” JJ swallowed hard. “Not Walmart. They don't like -
-” The hand was dipping under his elastic. “Beks, we’re casting a shadow.” A
little shuffling later resulted in total darkness. “Beks!” His hand went under
his shorts. “Beks, please don't - “
“Shhhhh…”
JJ opened his eyes as Otabek began stroking him. “My little brother might come
in.”
“Then you'll have to be quiet.” Otabek rubbed his thumb over JJ's tip until his
foreskin gave and he was rubbing at his head. “Do me, too.”
They were camping in St Philip’s playground, right next to the slides. “I used
to play here after Mass. When I was little.”
“Bet you were real cute.” Otabek thrust into his hand. Moved his faster. “Still
real cute. Real sweet.”
“I'm not cu -- “
Otabek squeezed. Hard. JJ saw stars and he whimpered and he liked that -
Crisse! “You are if I say you are.” JJ nodded as he let go. “Say it.”
“I'm cute.” There was a soft squelch and a hard thrust against his hip, mashing
JJ's hand between them. Otabek's dick pulsed and JJ’s did too and it felt so
good. “I'm so, so cute, Beks.”
“And sweet. Sweet for me, aren't you?” He was getting on top of him, now.
Pulling his shorts down, pulling his shirt up and pressing his hot, sweaty skin
against him.
“Beks? You know I got a girl, right?” It wasn't exactly true. Mr Yang was
crystal clear: Isabella wasn't dating while she was in high school. But they
could be friends.
His breath huffed against JJ's cheek. “Why’re you lying?” JJ moaned as Otabek
thrusted his dick against his. “That's it.”
He smelled like sweat and the Marlboro he snuck behind the oak tree. And he was
slick, he was hot, and he was hard everywhere Otabek made JJ touch him as he
placed JJ's hands on his chest, rubbing his palms over Otabek's nipples, his
back, then on his ass. He kept thrusting and thrusting like it was the real
thing, like dicks were made to rub against each other, like friends were meant
to do this. JJ kept wondering if the tent opening would zip open every time
someone walked by. Kept thinking this was it, they were going to finally get
caught after months and months of messing around in JJ's room late at night,
trying so hard not to let the bed springs squeak as Otabek made JJ jerk him
off. And more.
“It's not that I mind. Because I don't.” JJ gasped as Otabek pinched his
nipple. “God forgives way worse, but my folks -- “
“Your folks don't even pay attention to you, Jean.” Otabek reached down and
gripped their dicks together. “But I do.”
“Don't say things like that.” JJ turned his face away. “That's not true. They
sacrifice and they -” JJ whimpered as Otabek’s hand went so fast and JJ felt so
hot and so hard and Otabek was right there, right there --
“Shhh…” Otabek grabbed his face. Otabek pressed his mouth against his. And they
came.
++
He feels like he belongs to him. They sleep together in a tangled mess in JJ’s
bed. Otabek hasn't used the cot for weeks and no one says a word about it’s
pristine sheets and the knotted, wet wreck they make of JJ’s bed, by the time
5am rolls around and Otabek's phone buzzes. No one seems to think it's odd that
JJ dumps them in the washer in a half asleep grog before Otabek pushes him out
the door for their run. No one thinks it's odd that it's followed by one
shower. They say nothing as they stomp down at seven for fruit and muesli in
whole milk before Papa drives them off to the skate rink, never looking in the
rearview mirror as Otabek sits in the backseat with JJ, rubbing his hand up and
down his thigh.
He feels like he's Otabek's. And he doesn't mind. It's not godly and it's not
Catholic, but everyone sins, and that's what Confession is for. He likes how
Otabek kisses the back of his neck when he's fucking his ass crack. He likes
the way Otabek washes his hair after JJ practices giving him head in the
shower. He likes how Otabek calls him Sweet Jean when he's jerking JJ off, and
even says he's prettier than a girl. He likes the way Otabek stops to zip up
his tracksuit jacket. He likes how Otabek watches him work through his routines
and asks JJ what he thought of his. And how Otabek gets mad when JJ asks him
for a cigarette. He feels special. More special than he's ever felt, before.
So when Otabek takes a fall on the ice, when Papa claps once and tells him to
shake it off and try the jump again, when JJ sees him hang his head in a way
he's never seen Otabek hang his head, JJ is right down there, with him. “Come
on, buddy.” It's a stupid word but JJ feels stupid when he sees Otabek wince.
Stupid and helpless. “You hurt? Lemme help?”
Otabek can’t look him in the eye. Can't skate anymore, even though Papa has
checked his leg and says he's good to go. He just stares at the burgundy
carpet. JJ never thought of Otabek as anything other than tough. He never
realized how much smaller he was. Never realized he could have wrapped himself
around Otabek and held him. He wants to do that.
“Can we go home, Papa?”
He walks Otabek up the stairs to their room and unwraps him like a mystery as
he takes off all his clothes and pulls the sheet over their heads. And he
watches Otabek as the afternoon light permeates the sheet and shows JJ how
naked he is. “So…”
Otabek just stares back at him. “So…”
He puts his finger on Otabek's chest. “That quad Salchow.”
The corners of his mouth pull down. JJ touches one of them. “Yeah.”
“I'll show you. No big deal.” He rubs his knuckles against Otabek's cheek, just
like a Otabek does for him.
It only makes him frown more. “You don't have to.”
“Shhh.” JJ moves close. Close enough to touch his nose against his as he pushes
his finger over Otabek's lips. Then he kisses him, and smiles because his
finger is between their lips. “That's what friends are for.”
Otabek hesitates, then he pulls JJ's hand back. Then he kisses him back. It's
the smallest kiss, the shortest smack. “Okay.” And he reaches for him. Reaches
and JJ takes him in his arms and hums as Otabek buries his face in his neck.
“My friend.”
“Yeah.” JJ kisses his cheek. “My best friend.” Then his lips. Softly. So
softly, because Otabek is precious. Otabek is breakable. And Otabek is his,
just like JJ is Otabek’s. They stare into each other's eyes for a long time and
JJ sees pain. So much pain. “Don't cry.”
JJ isn't stupid. He knows this isn't about a jump, and he isn't going to push
him. Isn't going to break him, more. He tries to kiss it away, but even when he
opens his mouth and tries to use his tongue, it doesn't work. Even when he
reaches down, with spit in his hand and rubs against Otabek's dick, it doesn't
work. JJ doesn't understand. This always helped him feel good, even when he
wasn't sure it was a good idea. It made  him forget all the reasons they
shouldn't do this, and warmed him up, inside. “Don't you know how much I want
you?”
Otabek just groans as he gets hard. As JJ sits up and spits some more and
pushes his legs back. As he rubs his dick between his ass cheeks and stares
into Otabek's sad eyes. “I love you.”
“Don't say that.”
“No.” JJ rubs his cheek against Otabek's calf. “My friend.” He touches Otabek's
lip and he touches his skin and he touches him there. “I want you to be happy.”
Otabek arches his back. He's so beautiful. So sad and so beautiful. JJ takes
his hand. Kisses his hand. “Stay with me, forever.”
Otabek closes his eyes, says something in Russian, and comes for JJ. It's all
JJ needed. He doesn't even care about his own hard on. He just gathers Otabek
up and spoons him, kissing his neck and wipes it all off with a dirty shirt.
“I meant everything I said. Stay. I love you. Just… stay with me.”
JJ moves his head when Otabek doesn't answer. He doesn't want Otabek to feel
the wet from his tear. He just wants him to feel wanted, just like he did for
JJ.
++
JJ never forgot Otabek. Never forgot the day he finally nailed that quad. Never
forgot that night, when Otabek stole the keys to Papa’s caravan, drove JJ out
to the rink parking lot, then took down all the back seats so they could take
turns fucking each other with lube they shoplifted from the 711. Never forgot
kissing Otabek in the shower the morning he left for Almaty, and being grateful
the shower hid his tears as Otabek pushed him down and JJ sucked him off one
last time. He still couldn't swallow.
He never forgot, even after Isabella graduated and Mr Yang let him take her out
to Timmy’s for donuts. Even after he kissed her, especially after he kissed
her, and missed the taste of Marlboros. He couldn't forget. And even though he
knew he couldn't kiss Otabek anymore, even though Isabella really was his girl
now, and even though he was thinking marriage, he still couldn't help it when
his heart leapt in his chest: Otabek qualified for the Barcelona Grand Prix.
He couldn't wait to see his friend again. And when he did? His heart nearly
exploded. “Otabek!”
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