Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/278565. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Tokio_Hotel Relationship: Bill_Kaulitz/Tom_Kaulitz Character: Bill_Kaulitz, Tom_Kaulitz, Simone_Kaulitz Additional Tags: Non-con/rape-implied, Alternate_Universe_-_Historical, First_Time, Period Piece, Hurt/Comfort, Twincest Stats: Published: 2011-11-16 Chapters: 4/? Words: 8149 ****** Sweet Dream or A Beautiful Nightmare? ****** by Billxbesitztxmeinxherz Summary [SDOBN 2] Tom Trumper loves his little brother more than anything in the world and maybe just a little more than a brother should. Notes Thanks to JaquexSarai for the lovely banner girl it gave me chills. ***** Wanting ***** I was watching him again, like I normally do. It was nothing new I’d been watching him for years like this, with such a concentration that I didn’t even use when taking my HSC’s. Everyone knew how I watched him, and yet then again, no one knew how I watched him.   “Be good and watch the house love your Pa and I’ll be back around midnight,” A voice interrupted me from my thoughts and looked up to meet my mother’s caring brown eyes. I look at her long before turning my glance back to the boy playing with toy dinosaurs in front of me. I could watch him for hours and not get bored.   “Such a good boy always watching out for your little brother,” She cooed tucking a dread behind my ear, “We left pizza money in the kitchen.”   I nodded absently and went back to watching my Bill. I could hear Mum snickering quietly as she took one last look at little Bill splayed out on the floor and walked off making her heels echo in the hallway of our small three bedroom house. Mom and Dad shared a room and then there was one for Nana since Mum felt she couldn’t take care of herself in her old age leaving Bill and I to share one. Most teenagers my age would pitch a fit if they had to share a room with their little sibling. After all in the fall I’ll be in key stage four as an eleventh grader but in all honestly I’m actually glad that Bill and I share a room. You’ve never met anyone like before and probably never will; he’s an amazing little guy captivating in every way. It’s too bad he gets in trouble at school a lot the other kids tend to pick on him since he… well is pretty feminine for a boy. We weren’t the poorest lot out there but then again we definitely weren’t as rich as those kids that have flats in Kensington. Mum and her friends were always flaunting over the mothers from that neighborhood, disgusting really, thinking that they were so sophisticated with their fancy perfumes from France, their automobiles, and shiny jewelry. However those women’s sons are even worse, Andreas and his lot, you’d never met more spoiled kids.   “Simone we’re going to be late,” I could hear my Dad calling as he ran out to the car.   “Coming! Bill, be good for Tom!” Mum yelled as she grabbed her purse and dashed for the door.   “I will!” Bill’s high-pitched voice boomed just as Mum shut the front door. For such a small little thing he’s always made a ton of noise. I can remember back to when he was a baby even then when he didn’t know any words he’d make up his own strange sounds and babble them all day long. Mum and Dad were thrilled calling him a genius for creating his own little baby language, that’s the funny thing about parents, they teach you how to talk and then once you learn all they want to do is shut up.   “Tomi play with me!” Bill whined not taking his bright brown eyes off of his dinosaur set. For a little kid he had pretty expensive toys but then again that’s just how people liked to treat Bill. He had always had a certain pull to him, a magnetism, which was infectious and made you love him. In fact the very toy set he was playing with right now was one that I had bought for him. It’d taken me two months of working double jobs down at the docks to earn enough money for the whole damn thing but I’d pulled it off. The minute I saw how Bill’s eyes lit up when he opened his birthday present was enough to make me forget about all of my calluses and cuts from long hard days of manual labor. I was hard worker like my Dad always willing to do the hardest jobs and prove myself to my employers that they had made the right decision in hiring me. It was hard working at the docks but I did it. Mum wasn’t all too thrilled when she found out I’d gotten a job there so she and Dad had gotten into a fight. See my Dad, and his dad, and his dad’s dad had all worked down at the docks for as long as anyone could remember. Trumper and Listing Shipping had become a family business for my family and my friend Georg whose grandfather started it my mine. I was honored to continue the family business but unfortunately not quite as much as my Mum. When she found out she’d flipped saying that she wanted me to go to college and get a real job. Upon hearing that then my Pop had flipped and asked what she meant by getting a ‘real job’. See no one in my family has ever gone to college except for my like great-great-great-great grandfather or something that everyone later claimed was mentally insane. College was for rich people that had nothing else better to do. Why go to college when I already had a perfectly good job down at the docks?   “Tomi I said play with me!” My little brother drew out the words tugging on my arm. He broke of my thoughts and I flashed him one of my ‘movie people’ smiles that Bill always loved so much. It made him giggled like a loon exactly the reaction I had been looking for.   My family didn’t really know quite what to make of Bill when he was born. Unlike most of the Trumper babies weighing in at a healthy nine pounds Bill was a preme. He was so tiny when he was born about the size of my hand and didn’t even cry when he first came out. The doctor had panicked and slapped his little rump so hard that it turned red and then only then when they were about to announce him dead little Bill let out the loudest wail that I’ve heard… thus a star was born. After that the doctor couldn’t shut him up in fact no one really is able to shut up Bill except for me. He admires me that way little brother older brother admiration. But here’s where I’m going with this Bill’s different than a normal Trumper, he’s different than a normal person, Bill’s like an angel. Even now at age seven he knows that he’s special I can tell by the little twinkle in his eye whenever he asks for something. We don’t always exactly have the money but for Bill we always figure something out. Now here’s where the ‘movie people’ smile comes in. I took Bill down to the cinema a few weeks ago it had cost me a full shilling but I did it anyway. And he saw this actress lady see from the United States, I think her name was Mary Pickford, personally myself I like those films with that dancing little girl Shirley Temple but Bill’s loves this girl for some reason. So I took him to the cinemas and we saw this film of this girl with really curly hair and the next thing I know Bill’s out in the isles dancing around and twirling his hair like the girl in the films. Luckily none of my mates were there but still it was embarrassing chasing around your little seven year-old brother that looks like a girl.   “Alright Billa what do you want to play?” I sighed ruffling his dirty blonde hair.   “Dinosaurs.” Bill chirped immediately.   “But you always play dinosaurs why don’t we go outside and see if some of the other kids are out there huh?” I chided. Don’t get me wrong I love Bill, a little more than a brother should, but one can only play dinosaurs for so many times before their brain rots.   “No dinosaurs!” Bill wailed pounding his tiny little fists against my chest, “Play bad tosser boy!”   “Billa!” I gasped slapping a hand over his mouth and looking around even though we were the only ones home… well besides Nana but she could sleep through a bomb, “Where did you hear that?”   “W-what?” Bill asked innocently taking my hand off his mouth, “I heard Mac say it the other day when him and you went to school!”   “W-w-what? Billa you can’t say that word!” I stuttered shaking him firmly by the shoulders, “Okay? It’s a bad word! I shouldn’t have said it bad Tom.”   “Bad boy.” Bill giggled smacking me lightly over the head. I stuck out my tongue jokingly and let my head loll to the side making gagging noises as if Bill’s small hit had wounded me. He immediately panicked and began to shake my head in his small clammy hands begging for me to wake up and that he was sorry.   “Please Tomi I’m sorry!” He wailed pounding his tiny fist on the top of my head, “Wake up! I’ll be good! Sorry! Sorry!” He gave another particularly hard bang to the head and I scowled shoving him off.   “Oy cut it out! Bill that really hurt!” I complained sitting up from my spot on the floor. Bill instantly jumped on me and began to hug and kiss my face telling me he was sorry.   “I-I thought you dieded!” Bill wailed caressing my pounding head like one would stroke a cat, “I killeded you!”   “Died and killed.” I sighed picking him up and placing him in my lap. I ran a hand through his thick mane of hair and inhaled.   “W-what?” He whispered looking up at me with wide eyes.   “You said ‘dieded’ and ‘killeded’ when that’s wrong the correct words would be died or killed. Not the others.” I laughed whipping the tears off his cheeks with the pad of my thumb.   “I don’t care,” Bill sniffed tucking his head under my chin. I could feel his little hands grabbing my vest and sighed rubbing his back to comfort him, “Are you okay now?”   “Yeah Billa I’m fine,” I smiled before blowing a raspberry on his cheek. He immediately let out a high-pitched whine and jolted off my lap tumbling towards his toys.   “Tomi play with me!” He giggled throwing a tyrannosaurus at my feet.   “Alright, alright-ouch son of a bitch! Bill!” I cried out when Bill unexpectedly leaned down and bit my nose, “What was that for?”   “Rawr!” Bill giggled clapping his hands as he skipped off towards his toys, “Rawr!”   “Bill that really hurt!” I scolded rubbing the red spot forming on my nose.   “Rawr! Rawr!” He cheered, “Rawr! Rawr! Rawr! Rawr! Rawr!”   He grabbed onto one of my dreads and began to tug forcefully on them making little roaring noises at me until my scalp burned. I tired shooing him off but every time I just grazed his shirt he’s twirl away with the grace of a ballerina. He continued to dance around me laughing and giggling when before he plopped down into my lap and took my face in his hands.   “Tosser okay?” He cooed rubbing at my nose.   I grumbled and he smiled shyly at me one more time before he slowly leaned in. My heart stopped for a second and I thought I was dreaming. For as long as I could remember I had sexually attracted to Bill whether is was right or wrong I just couldn’t help myself. I could tell his intentions were innocent as he cupped my cheek breathing in my face as he looked over my nose with a worried look. I smell this afternoon’s lunch on his breath and I grimaced slightly at the combination of fish and maple syrup, only Bill. His little hazel eyes were concentrating hard on the spot on my nose as he sat in my lap thinking. He had the most adorable expression on his face and I couldn’t help it any longer. Gently I lifted my large calloused hands and cupped both of Bill’s cheeks. His smile faltered for a moment but he continued to cup my cheek in his small delicate hand probably thinking that we were playing a game of some sort. He shyly met my eyes as I leaned in until our foreheads were touching and our mouths were only centimeters apart.   “T-tomi?” Bill whispered as his eyes fluttered closed when I began to message the back of his neck.   “Rawr.” I whispered leaning in until our lips touched chastely.   I heard Bill’s breath hitch and took one hand off of Bill’s cheek and went to wrap it around his waist pulling him closer. I was about to do it. Break every rule they had taught me in church and sin. But for Bill I pushed these thoughts aside and stared deep into his wide hazel eyes not daring to move my lips as they rested softly against his. It was actually Bill that made the first move when he attempted to adjust himself in my lap and ended up smashing our mouths together more. Instantly I opened my mouth and began to suck on Bill’s mouth using my tongue to part his lips. He let out a little gasp at this and I took the opportunity to fully put my tongue in his mouth. He stilled instantly as I began to message his tongue with mine, I desperately flicked at it trying to get him to give me some reaction when he let out the smallest moan and sank in my arms like jello.   “Oh Tomi,” He sighed as I licked around the inside of his mouth squeezing his arms hard. It was the sound of the creaking stairs that made me abruptly break away from him. Bill giggled quietly and looked at me with dazed eyes as I sat there frozen with fear at the sound of Nana coming down the stairs.   “Boys are you alright down there? It’s awfully quiet?” I heard her call. Bill opened his huge mouth and inhaled when I slapped a hand over it and called back up, “Yeah Nana we’re fine just telling secrets!”   “Well alright you two but don’t be getting into trouble!” I kept my hand pressed tightly over Bill’s mouth until the wooden stairs stopped creaking and I could hear Nana shuffling around upstairs anymore.   “God,” I sigh releasing Bill who immediately began to ask a hundred questions.   “Tomi why did you do that? What was that? I’ve seen Mommy and Daddy do that once. Where we kissing? Why? Tell me! Tell me! Tell me-” I pressed a hand firmly down over his little mouth and he hushed looking at me confused.   “No we weren’t kissing it was a game,” I lied smiling down at him, “A secret game that only you and I can know about okay? Not even Nana can know.” I felt Bill licking my palm and I pulled my hand away disgusted.   “Why?” He chirped when I removed my hand, “Why can’t Mommy know?”   “It’s a special game for big boys,” I smirk down at how his eyes widened with interest, “And you’re not old enough to play yet but, since you’re my little brother I thought I’d let you play too. Mommy and Daddy don’t think you’re ready yet. They think you’re a baby.”   “I am not a baby!” Bill cried outraged. I smiled down at his flustered face, this was too easy, “Tomi, I want to play too! I promise not to tell anyone! Promise!”   “Promise I could get in a lot of trouble you can’t tell anyone… ever.” I smiled stroking his cheek.   “I promise,” He nodded enthusiastically, “Now let’s play dinosaurs! Rawr!”   I took a look at him and sighed shaking my head before picking up a dinosaur and walking over to his little corner in our shabby house. Times are tough these days and everyday I worry more and more about my family’s future. Mum says that I have to lighten up a bit and that things will get better sooner or later they have to. But that’s just who I am, Tom the downer. Bill’s always been the optimistic one in the family the exact opposite of me. My name is Tom Trumper. I am fifteen going on sixteen years old in the fall. I live in London, England in the borough of Hackney not exactly the most ideal place to live. Not a lot of things in life impress me except for one, my little brother Bill. I love him more than anything else in this world and whether he knows it or not…   I want him. ***** Flower ***** “Tomi I want to go to the park today!” Bill squealed tugging on the sleeve of my coat. I grumbled and tried to keep balancing the pile of groceries in my arms but Bill’s insistent tugging and whining. He latched on to my right sleeve with both hands and let his knees give out so he dragging me down with his whole body weight now.   “Billa!” I scowled just managing to catch a falling cabbage as it fell over the top of my grocery bag, “You’re going to spill all the food and then what will we eat?”   “Seth from down the street says that in Southwark they eat rats for dinner since no one’s Mommy or Daddy can get a job!” Bill chirped wrinkling his nose prettily. I smiled down at him and how he’s all wrapped up in his numerous hand-me-down coats and scarves. I spy the slightest strip of faded pink peeking out from Bill’s layers and I smile, it’s one of Mum’s old coats but since money is scarce in these times we’re all dressing in rags, even those spoiled kids in Kensington aren’t out constantly shopping like they used to. It was about eleven years ago in 1918 that people started losing jobs, Dad tried to reassure us that nothing was wrong and it’d all get better soon, the year is 1929 now and things are still looking bleak. I was about five years when the Great Depression started and have grown up being poor I try not to think about it too much but the sight of my angelic little Bill all wrapped in rags really makes my heart sink.   “That’s not true,” I lied ruffling his hair sending small blonde tuffs to-and- fro, “People don’t eat rats silly.”   “B-but that’s what Seth from down the street says!” Bill protested as he wrapped his slim arms around my waist. Some people give us strange looks as I walk through the streets balancing my groceries with Bill wrapped around my legs but I ignore them. Jealous. They’ve always been jealous of Billa ever since he was little, they don’t like that their strapping young sons are chasing after Bill rather than a nice girl in a dress. Too bad none of them are even able to get close to Bill before I scoop him up just out of their reach. Bill is mine and mine alone.   “Well I honestly don’t care what Seth from down the street says,” I coughed against the freezing London winter air as I threw open the door. Bill was still wrapped around my waist resting his small feet on the tops of my tattered shoes. He let out little giggles as I purposely swung my legs around taking his feet with them.   “Tomas? Wihelm? Is that you?” I heard Mum call from up the stairs, “Shut the door or you’ll let all the cold air in!”   “I already did don’t get your knickers in a twist!” I shouted back snorting. Mothers can be so unbelievable at times you’d think they have the least bit of trust in you but no.   “Mommy I want to go to the park! Make Tomi take me to the park!” Bill called as he skipped up the stairs leaving me to put the groceries away. I really don’t mind having to do all the work while Bill relaxes after all he’s far more delicate than me, however I do space out for a moment as I watch his little bum wiggling as he ran up the stairs.   “Tomi Mommy says we can!” Bill called out totally oblivious to my staring a few moments ago.   “Y-yeah fine.” I mumbled rubbing my face as I packed away the last sad excuse of cabbage but it’s better than nothing, “Let’s go.”   I bundled up Bill in his numerous coats one more time before we headed back out into cold. There aren’t as many people out on the streets now as the wind blew harshly against my face and I asked Bill one more time if he was sure he wanted to go to the park. But of course he said yes tugging me along after him. He has a surprising grip for a seven year old and he bit his red plump lips determinedly as we trudged through the snow towards the park. Bill kept talking the entire time twirling around in the snow smiling. I wasn’t even really listening to half of what he was saying I was just watching him. I would give almost anything to be a child again everything always seemed better as a child. Being able to not have a care in the world and having people constantly fussing over you. I let out a snort at that thought as Bill continued to twirl in circles with his head dipped back towards the sky. Who was I kidding no one ever fussed over me as a child I was raised to be a strong Trumper boy not pampered like Bill. Often at times I think Mum forgets that Bill is a boy. Mum had always wanted a little girl even if she won’t admit to Dad and I. It obvious by the way she looks at the girls of Kensington, how they’re all dolled up, and I can tell that’s what she wants in life. We started calling Bill, Billa, when he was about two. He’s always looked very delicate and feminine and I think the fact that his first word was flower pretty much says it all. I think that’s one of the main reasons Bill and I are so different in personality, while Bill gets to be delicate and soft I’ve taken it upon myself to be the man in the family. Dad was reluctant at first to call him Billa but he eventually warmed up to it.   “Tomas can you check on the baby he’s gurgling again,” Simone called from the kitchen.   “Yeah Mum I’m on it,” Tom called back getting up off the couch and walking towards the baby crib, he was greeted by a large pair of hazel eyes staring up at him.   “Hello baby.” Tom smiled making a funny face. It did the trick as Bill let out the loudest laugh yet clapping his hands as he continued to gurgle in his baby language, “What is it silly? What are you trying to say?”   “Fowwuda!” Bill babbled reaching out his chubby hands at Tom, “Fowwuda!”   “What? What are you saying silly?” Tom laughed leaning over the crib some more, “What is it?”   “Fowwuda! Fow…fower…fower!” Bill gurgled grabbing at the air.   “Wait what?” Tom asked with wide eyes as his heart stopped. There was no way he must be imagining it. There was no way that Bill had actually managed to form a word already.   “Fower! Flower! Flower! Flower!” Bill laughed loudly. Tom sat there stunned not moving at Bill picked up his chubby foot and began to suck on it. He stared up at Tom with sparkling hazel eyes and giggled chewing on his foot.   “M-mum! Mum! MUM!” Tom shouted snapping out of his shock, “MUM!”   The sound of crashing pans echoed from out of the kitchen and Simone came rushing out asking what was wrong.   “The baby he… talked! The baby talked! Bill can talk!” Tom spoke quickly so all of the words messed together. Simone stared down at her oldest son with a puzzled look on her face.   “Flower! Flower! Flower!” Bill laughed clapping his hands. Simone whipped her head around to face the crib and looked down into it shocked. Her baby had just talked. Bill had just spoken his first word.   “Oh my god,” Simone’s face broke into a smile, “Oh my god! Gordon! GORDON! Get in here!”   “What? What?” Gordon shouted rushing into the room. He was still in his work clothes from the docks and he smelled like fish but Simone didn’t care as she threw her arms around his neck, “What’s going on? Is the baby okay?”   “Oh honey!” Simone smiled pulling back to look at his concerned face, “Bill just said his first word!”   “Really? Sim that’s amazing! What was it? Mommy? Or was he like Tom over here and said Daddy first?” Gordon beamed rushing over to the crib to see for himself.   “Flower.” Bill beamed up at his father when he came into view.   “What?” Gordon asked with a puzzled look.   “Flower! Flower!” Bill laughed loudly clapping his hands again. Gordon’s excitement left his face immediately and he frowned leaning over more to make sure he heard clearly.   “What did he say?”   “Flower! Flower! Flower! Flower!” Bill giggled again. Simone nodded smiling at her husband while Tom was staring dazed at his little brother.   “Flower?” Gordon said flatly, “His first word is flower? Who the fuck taught him the word flower? What kind of first word is that? That’s like a girl word!”   “N-now Gordon,” Simone stammered at her husband’s sudden mood change, “Flower is a lovely first word.”   “For a girl!”   “I like it,” Tom whispered patting Bill softly on the head as the baby had dozed off already, “It’s a good first word Billa.”   “What did you call him?” Gordon’s voice made Tom jump.   “Nothing Dad. I called him Bill. That is his name after all.” Tom smiled weakly too scared to move.   “You called him Billa,” Gordon deadpanned staring from his smiling wife to his scared son, “I-I… I need some beer… I’m going to bar don’t bother to wait up for me at dinner.”   “But Gordon!” Simone called as he began to walk out the front door.   “Not now Simone,” Gordon sighed running a hand over his face, “Just not now.”   “Tomi!” Bill gasped rushing back towards me burring his face in his stomach. He mumbled something after that but I didn’t quite catch it.   “What is it Billa?” I asked concerned lifting his chin and looking into his wide eyes. He looked like he had seen a ghost and tugged him into my coat as my protective instincts took over looking around. There was no one else in the barren park blanketed with snow.   “They’re playing the secret game,” Bill whispered licking his pink lips. I felt something stir inside of me at the sight but I shrugged it off knowing we couldn’t do that in public.   “Secret game? What secret game?”   “From two nights ago when you watched me,” Bill whispered, “You know… we played with dinosaurs and then… the secret game.” He hissed the last part clenching my coat.   “Bill,” I sighed, “What are you talking about? What secret game?”   He turned red at this and looked down at his feet biting his lip. I could tell he was thinking hard on how to explain it to me and frowned scanning my mind for what he could be talking about. Secret game? When did we play a secret game?   “You put your tongue in my mouth,” Those words snapped me out of my thoughts and I clapped a hand over his mouth making sure no one heard him. We were still alone in the park and I sighed removing my hand before bending down in front of him so we where eye level.   “Billa you can’t talk about that in public it’s a… secret,” The words hit me like a ton of bricks and Bill’s eyes lit up at my realization, “Oh god that secret game?”   “Yes behind the tree but they’re doing some other things too,” Bill pondered for a moment, “The boy had his hand on the girl’s boob and she was doing something in his pants. I wanted to see what but it was too embarrassing to watch.”   “Oh god Billa,” I laughed watching at how his face turned red, “Where which tree? That one over there?”   “Yes.” He whispered putting his hands over his eyes.   I let out a chuckle at his shyness and wrapped my arm around his shoulder, “Alright Billa let’s go home we’ll let the two people play their secret game.”   I winked him giving his arm a squeeze. His face turned bright red again and I laughed leading him along back to the house. The sun was going down in the distance and I smiled the night was always my favorite time of the day.   ===============================================================================   “Goodnight boys,” I heard Mum call from the hallway.   “Night!” I called back from where I was tucked safely in my bed.   A large quilt divided Bill and my room to give me some more privacy, if only she knew I used that privacy to jack to the image of my sleeping little brother. Her footsteps shifted as she was going towards Bill’s section of room now to check on him. The sound of her wet kiss on his forehead made me frown and she finally shut the creaky door behind her before setting off down the stairs. I waited until the sound of the her feet creaking stopped and I knew she was back down in our parents room on the first floor. Then there was only silence.   “About time,” I whispered carefully sliding out of bed. My feet hit the cold wooden floors with a thud and I smiled wiggling my toes. Then carefully and quietly I moved the thick quilt to the side and made my way across the floor to the small twin bed pressed up against the wall. Bill side of the room had the only window and now the moon’s light was illuminating his face as he slept peacefully. Then making sure not to disturb him I lifted the comforter up and crawled under the covers with him. I let out a small gasp as he pressed his cold body against mine and he began to stir.   “T-tomi?” He whispered confused in his groggy sleep voice, “What are you doing?”   “Shh,” I hushed pulling him in my arms. He let out a little sigh and curled up against me nuzzling down into the warmth of my neck, “Just sleep.”   He wiggled a little more so that our bodies were pressed flush against each other and he jerked back stiffening.   “Tomi?” He gasped.   “Yeah?” I smirked.   “How did you get your hand under the covers? Something’s poking my leg.” ***** Sausage ***** I lay absolutely still being careful to not even move a muscle as I felt Bill shift next to me. Occasionally his elbow or knee would jab me as he curiously adjusted himself to see what exactly was poking him in the thigh.   “Tomi?” I heard him hiss, “Tomi are you awake still?”   I let out a loud snore in response and rolled myself half onto Bill. He let out a squeak at my sudden movement and I tried to hide my grin even though I knew he wouldn’t be able to see it in the dark. My entire body was flushing with arousal as Bill timidly reached around under the covers searching for what was now poking him only centimeters away from his groin. I felt the very tip of his finger graze my clothed member and I couldn’t stop the low moan that escaped my lips. I quickly snapped my mouth shut but it was too late Bill had entirely halted his motions and was now trembling next to me. I could feel the pure tension radiating off of him as his spine arched away from me taut and ready to strike. I had to do something and fast.   “B-Billa?” I groaned in the sleepiest voice I could muster, “What are you doing?”   I punctured my last word with a soft yawn and rubbed at my eyes to add to the effect. Bill bought it immediately and visibly relaxed as his face turned red with embarrassment. I propped myself up on an elbow repositioning my legs so that Bill’s were draped across my lap now. We were always intimate with each other like this so I knew he wouldn’t find the position suspicious, if he only knew.   “I can’t sleep,” He whispered so softly I almost didn’t hear it. He curled up into a ball tucking the pillow under his chin as I stared down with fake confusion on my face.   “Why not baby?” I cooed brushing some blonde hair out of his eyes. He smiled weakly back up at me and wiggled a little closer to me. It took all my self- control to not start cheering right then, I had him, “Nightmares?”   “N-no,” He whispered turning even redder now. I stared down at him with a blank expression. I knew he could still feel my erection poking into his thigh as he shifted uncomfortably over it trying to figure out what was happening.   “Tomi?” He gulped, “D-does your sausage get hard?”   “W-what?” I sputtered laughing. Bill ducked back under the covers immediately mumbling something incoherent as I continued to laugh, “My sausage? You mean my penis?”   Bill turned even redder at the last word and nodded slowly not daring to meet my eyes. I took a deep breath in that moment and stared down at him, my perfect little angel, flushing from embarrassment as he asked me about erections. I nodded slowly and dragged my fingertips across his soft white face and smiled.   “R-really?” He gasped quietly, “Does it happen a lot?”   “Why?” I smirked.   “W-well…” He trailed off. I took his chin in my hand and tilted it up at me so he was looking into my eyes. There was nowhere left to hide, “I-I think your sau-… penis is hard right now.”   “I know,” I said dully loving how his eyes bulged in scandal, “I was having a really good dream.”   “A dream? A dream made your penis hard?” His eyes widened to the size of saucers.   “Billa you call it a cock if you like, penis sounds so…”   “Scary?”   “Stupid.”   “Oh,” He whispered looking down again, “W-why?”   “Huh?”   “Why did your dream make you hard?”   “Well,” I sighed leaning back against the pillows. I reached out and grabbed him by the arm pulling him up so he was lying on top of me. He seemed a little scared at first but soon he relaxed setting his head down onto my chest listening to my heartbeat, “It’s big kid things and I don’t know if you’re cool enough to handle it.”   “What?” He squeaked, “I can handle it! Come on Tomi tell me! I want to know!”   “I don’t know.” I said in a singsong voice, “Mommy and Daddy wouldn’t like it if I told you.”   “I promise I won’t tell! Promise!” He begged bouncing on top of my frame. It sent shivers down my spine and I chuckled growling playfully at him. I meant for the tone to come out nice and light but instead it came out deep and full of arousal. Bill stopped bouncing at looked into my eyes with a confused look.   “Are you mad at me?” He whispered looking hurt, “I’m sorry Tomi. I promise I won’t bother you anymore. I’m sorry.”   “You can’t tell anyone,” I said flatly ignoring his apology, “No one. Not Mum, not Dad, not Nana, not even the other kids at school. You tell no one. Got it?”   “Y-yes.” He nodded eagerly.   “Alright, my cock gets hard when I think abut people I love.” I said simply.   “That’s it?” Bill asked knitting his eyebrows together, “I think about Mommy and Daddy and my thingy doesn’t get hard.”   “Not that kind,” I snorted, “People that you want to see naked. People that you want to do things to.”   “What kind of things?” He whispered with wide eyes.   I smiled back devilishly at him before reaching out towards him. In a second I had grabbed him by the back of the neck and was now forcing my tongue inside of his mouth. He made little mewling sounds as he tried to pull away but when I gave a sharp tug on the hair on the back of his head he stopped. My lips met his hungrily and I made wet noises as I tried to devour him whole. His breath was becoming more rapid now and I could feel him arching up slightly. I wrapped my legs around his in one fluid motion and began grinding him down into me. The sensation was amazing and I moaned low into his pretty little mouth before finally releasing him.   “Well,” I panted nonchalantly, “In my dream I was thinking about Princess Victoria Louise. So I guess that’s what made me hard. Then again I dream about you sometimes and get hard.”   “You kissed me!” Bill sputtered back bluntly with a shocked look on his face.   “Yeah? We were playing the secret game.” I snorted putting my hands behind me head. He stared back at me with those big hazel eyes of his and I could tell he was conflicted inside. I knew I had pushed him a little too much in that short make out session but I was getting frustrated of waiting for his virgin mind to catch-up. I wanted him as quick as possible and was willing to use force if necessary.   “You didn’t tell me we were playing the secret game,” He whispered looking down at his hands blushing again. I mentally rolled my eyes at his modesty and sat up inching closer to him on the bed. His innocence was beginning to annoy me and I snarled roughly grabbing his chin and forcing him to look at me. He let out a little yelp at how rough I was being with him and his little sounds went straight to my groin making me squeeze him even harder.   “I don’t have to tell you when we’re going to play and when we’re not,” I hissed angrily at him. I grabbed him by his right bicep and squeezed hard shaking him with every word, “You wanted to play the secret game. You wanted to know why your cock gets hard. You touched your brother’s cock while he was asleep. Those are grownup things, something little children shouldn’t know about. What would Mommy and Daddy say if they found out you knew about them?”   “B-but you told me!” He whimpered as I continued to shake him.   “No you begged me and left me no choice! This is your fault Bill! You’re just a stupid little kid!” I snarled in his face.   “T-Tomi…” He trembled as tears began to run down his face, “Why are you being mean to me? Why are you being so mean?”   “Because you were bad!” I smiled evilly at him. Bill seemed to lose it then and I watched him as he began to sob into his lap crying and sniffing. I had never been to rough or mean towards him before and I knew that. His Tomi was normally so nice and submissive to him nothing like the monster that was coming out now. I had waited years for this and now it was finally becoming a reality. I was going to make Bill mine. Dominate him until he wouldn’t dare even breathe unless I told him to. Bill continued to cry into his lap gasping for air and apologizing for being bad.   “Shut up!” I growled slapping him across the face as he let out a small whimper.   “Tomi I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” He sobbed grabbing onto my arm, “Just please! Please stop hitting me! I’ll be good! I promise!”   “Now you’re asking me to not tell Mum and Dad?” I gasped in fake shock, “Billa that’s even worse!”   “No!” He choked on a sob, “Please! I’ll do anything! Just don’t tell Mommy and Daddy! I’ll be good! I’ll be good.”   “Well I don’t know,” I sighed. He let out another little sob at this and I smiled leaning back to take a good look at him. His eyes were now pink and swollen from crying and his hair was sticking to his face from his tears. In all honesty he was a complete mess. I had entirely broken him. I had broken that trust that he had with me, his only brother someone he admired, and was now using it to manipulate him to my needs. Sweet.   “Please Tomi,” He sniffed rubbing at his nose, “I’ll do anything you want. I can clean your side of the room everyday?”   “Hmm no that’s too easy it only takes me like a minute to do that.”   “I could… give you half of my meals?”   “Nope.” I smiled deviously at him. I could see him falling apart in front of me and I smiled at how sad and pathetic he looked.   “I could… we could play the secret game everyday?” He trembled looking up at me with hope filled eyes.   “No.” I said blankly watching at how crestfallen he looked, “How about we play the next level of the secret game?”   “N-next level?” Bill shivered even though the small room had become hot a sticky, “I thought all we had to do was kiss.”   “Bill if you don’t want to listen then I’ll just tell Mum and Dad about all the bad things you’ve done.” I taunted.   “No! Please! I’ll do it! I’ll do whatever you want! Just please!” He sobbed.   “Rule One,” I breathed excitedly, “You call me master whenever we are by our selves got it? Rule Two you better be hard every night before we go to bed or I’ll have to punish you. Rule Three you do whatever whenever I tell you to no matter how scary it may seem. And finally Rule Four if you ever tell anyone about this, ever, I’ll kill you.”   His eyes seemed to split his head open at that statement and when I shouted if he understood he nodded frantically. Then there was the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs. I cringed letting go of Bill and shoving back down under the covers, I had been to loud this time and now Mum had heard.   “Boys?” She breathed as she flung open the door, “What’s going on? I heard screaming.”   “Nothing Mum,” I smiled sweetly gripping Bill’s hand hard under the covers, “Billa was just having a bad dream weren’t you?”   “Y-yes Mommy,” Bill whispered softly, “But Tomi is making it better.”   “Oh,” Mom smiled one of her goofy grins whenever I did anything nice for Bill, “Alright then I’ll let you two be. You’re so lucky to have as such a nice older brother as Tom.”   “Yeah.” Bill whispered again smiling weakly.   “Alright then goodnight boys.”   “Night Mum.” I smiled as she carefully shut the door behind her. I held my breath as it clicked and her footsteps retreated down the stairs leaving us in silence. Bill was breathing rapidly now and I smiled pulling him on top of me again.   “Tomi-” He began before I slapped a hand over his mouth.   “That’s not what you call me when we’re alone now is it?” I panted slowly grinding into him.   “N-no,” His breath hitched as my arousal rubbed against his soft one, “I’m s- sorry Master.”   “Mmm,” I hummed, “Good baby now go to sleep.”   “B-but…”   “Now!” I ordered slapping his bottom.   “Yes Master!” He yelped.   “Good,” I smiled as my eyes began to get heavy, “Good boy.” ***** Breakfast ***** When I awoke the next morning I was met with the sound of soft snores and the warmth of another body pressing against mine. In that moment I panicked, body tensing, as my bare arm brushed against whomever was lying next to me. However upon hearing soft whimpers I slowly relaxed as I realized it was only Bill. Bill. The object that I have lusted after for so long, the one who I thought never in a million years I’d be able to obtain. I am tempted to scream for joy as I replay last night’s events in my head and chuckle when I realize such thoughts are already making me hard. The sight of Bill swathed up in the warm sheets of his small bed is all too tempting and I groan giving the front of my trousers a good rub. “You’re finally mine.” I whisper endearingly as I stroke some hair off of his precious face. There is a painfully strong feeling churning within my gut and I find it quite frightful, as if at any moment, I will lose total control of my body and it will spasm in euphoria. The plump roundness of Bill’s cheeks are tinted with red as the cold winter air penetrates our small house and his lips are the shade of rose petals. I find myself leaning closer and closer to his face, trapped in awe of this small person’s beauty, I cannot contain the lust polling in my groin. How my cock is straining against the starched fabric of my pants or contain how I wish to kiss his soft lips- “Tom! Bill!” A voice bellows breaking me of my trance and I stumble out of bed afraid of being caught, “Breakfast if ready! Come down stairs!” I look frantically around the room for a moment, as if my desires have manifested somehow and will reveal my darkest secret to my mother, but there are none. Bill had begun to stir in his bed now and he rubs at his eyes sleepily as he wakes up. “T-Tomi?” Bill punctuates with a yawn as he blinks his little brown eyes around dazed, “Is it morning?” “Yes get up breakfast is ready.” I smile and start off down the stairs. The smell of eggs, biscuits, and sausage wafts through the house and I inhale deep. Father is already seated at the table as Mother brings over my plate and sets it down in my place. “Where’s your brother?” Father asks dryly looking over the top of his paper. Father’s eyes are bloodshot and he’s neglected to shave this morning. I can tell he’s sozzled as he looks like Death himself after Father’s been out drinking at the pub and snicker into my shoulder. This means Father won’t be going to work today and will probably laze about ordering Mum around. “He’s coming.” I nod pouring myself some cider and Mother sighs wiping her hands on her apron. “Bill, dear!” Mother calls up the stairs to our shared bedroom, “Come downstairs or your breakfast will get cold!” “I’m coming Mother!” Bill replies gaily as he waddles down the steps still in his sleeping wear which consists of one of Father’s old shirts that’s been cut down some as it is like a dress on Bill, “I wanted to find my toy truck but-” Bill trails off and I pick my head from my plate to see what’s the matter. He’s standing there, staring at me as if he’s seen a ghost and I force myself not to smile but feign innocence. I make a show of titling my head and looking at him confused as Father sets down his paper to see what the fuss is about. “Bill?” Father frowns and Bill jumps startled, “What’s got you this morning?” “Nothing.” Bill shakes his head as he looks away from me and it is then that I finally grin. He’s not going to tell Mother or Father. This will only get easier as time passes and we fall into our roles. “Well sit down then,” Mother says as Bill takes his seat, “I’ve made eggs, biscuits, and sausage if you want some.” Bill’s smiles quickly fades as he eyes the sausage links in front of him and his eyes immediately dart to me, round with fear. It is then that I truly take in Bill as the image of his sleeping form fades away in my mind. His cheeks are not rosy as I thought they had been, but rubbed raw from him furiously wiping away tears. He glances at me from across the table as his mouth opens. I never will know what Bill meant to say in that moment but a sudden sharp kick and malicious grin from me shuts him up. It is after this key moment, the moment that could have saved Bill from this trauma, that will change the course of our lives. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!