Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/13576407. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage Category: Other Fandom: The_Walking_Dead_(TV) Character: Negan_(Walking_Dead), Negan's_Baseball_Bat_Lucille_(Walking_Dead), OC_- Character, Reader, Simon Additional Tags: Rape, Violence, Pedophilia, Father_Figure_Negan, based_on_a_video Series: Part 9 of The_Walking_Dead_Reader_Insert_Oneshot/Stories Stats: Published: 2018-02-04 Words: 4796 ****** Suffer in Silence ****** by KingCrowleysLittlePet_666 Summary The reader is a little girl that the Saviors took in weeks ago. On a day when Negan and his men had to go on a supply run, Frank, Negan's left hand man, had to watch the reader. Little did she know that that moment would change her life for the worse. WARNING: DO NOT READ THIS WORK IF YOU ARE TRIGGERED BY THE FOLLOWING: pedophilia and rape This is based on a video that I watched on Youtube. The reader is six years old Notes This is my very first time writing something this triggering. This is not made to romanticize any topics presented within this work. Your small feet padded against the concrete floor as you ran through the halls of The Sanctuary. A colorful piece of paper was held tightly in your small hands, the image of two people colored childishly with cheap crayons in the center of the paper. When you reached your destination, you knocked on the door many times with your tiny fist. “Negan! Negan!” You shouted happily, a smile on your face. A gap was in between two top teeth - the location of where the last of your baby teeth had fallen out. It didn’t take long before you heard footsteps in the room. They got closer and closer to the door until it was opened, revealing none other than Negan, the leader of The Sanctuary. His hair was dripping wet, along with the growing salt and pepper scruff on his face. He wore a gray t-shirt and jeans. You were rather young when the apocalypse started. So young, it seemed, that some of the early events of the end of the world were rather vague to you. Now, you were six and facing the damnation that no one would dream of being how they spend their childhood. You had to admit, you had your ups and downs, but as you ran through the life you lived, you had some wonderful people along the way. You had a group. A really caring and compassionate one that found you right after your father and mother passed. However, the group was small and very weak. They kept themselves hidden quite well until, one day, the walkers - or nasties as you loved to call them because of the foul odor they would emit - overran your camp. You were the only one to survive as far as you knew. All you remember from that day, beside the fact that it was the day that marked your lonely trek through the woods, were the screams that echoed through the trees and still gave you nightmares every now and then. A day or two - weeks in your little mind - of moving through the forest, you were finally discovered by a group of men. A large group of men with a tall and dominant leader, Negan. The first time you saw him, you were terrified, especially with the weapon that he wielded - you would later find out that he loved to call her Lucille. The bat with the barbed wire was horrifying, at first. You were on the ground of the forest with a river of tears that ran down your face out of pure fear. You remember Negan walking up to you and putting the bat away. He actually gave it to someone else and, with his charisma and calm tone, the tears slowly stopped and you were comfortable enough to reach a hand towards him and have him grasp yours. The entire time back to The Sanctuary, Negan didn’t touch Lucille. Ever since then, you had grown fonder of him and was slowly starting to view him as the father figure that you once lost. “Hey (Y/N).” He said. “What’re you doing up so early?” Small pants still escaped your lungs from the run earlier. You showed him the image. “I made you a picture.” You said. “Before you leave.” Negan examined the picture. It was an image of himself and you in, very sloppy yet adorable, stick figure forms, holding hands. Negan slowly smiled and took the picture in his large hand. “Thank you, princess.” He said. “It’ll help keep you safe from the nasties!” You said and clapped your hands. Negan chuckled deeply, his chest rumbling. “Thank you. I’ll hang onto this, okay?” You nodded rapidly and hugged his legs. Negan hugged you back. “I have to get ready to go on a supply run. Go ahead and go have fun.” He patted your back as the two of you separated from the hug. You nodded. “Okay!” You exclaimed. “Will you tell me when you’re getting ready to leave?” Negan chuckled and nodded. “Yes. I will.” He promised. “Okay!” You smiled widely before you hugged him again quickly and made your way back down the hallway to your bedroom. Negan had a pleasant smile on his face as he watched you vanish around the corner. He looked down at the picture, folded it up, and then put it in his back pocket. He walked into the room and closed the door as he continued to get dressed for the day. You sat in your room, at the small table that was littered with crayons, markers, colored pencils, and new and used paper. Just as you were coloring in a small, yellow circle that you would identify as a sun, there was a small knock on the door. You looked towards it. “Come in.” You said. Negan slowly opened the door. He was in his usual attire: the leather jacket, the jeans, the red scarf around his neck, and, most importantly, Lucille by his side. “Hey princess.” He said. You immediately stood up and ran to Negan and hugged him, being sure to avoid hurting yourself on Lucille. “Be safe.” You whispered. “I will.” He said. “If you need anything, go talk to Frank.” “Is Frank still hurt?” You asked and looked up at him. Negan sighed and nodded. “Sure is.” He said. “A broken leg takes a while to heal.” Frank had been Negan’s left-hand man - next to Simon being his right-hand man - ever since you arrived at The Sanctuary. Frank was Negan’s friend. The one man that he trusted with his own life. Two weeks ago, in order to escape from a close call from some of the nasties, Frank fell down a hill and came in contact with a tree. He broke his leg in two places. Ever since then, Frank had been forced to stay at The Sanctuary while everyone else went on their supply runs. During that time, however, whenever Negan had to leave, he put Frank in charge of watching you. You had to admit that there were some instances when Frank was rather short with you, which not only scared you but made you wonder what you did wrong. Most of the time, Frank was polite, though, keeping in mind that he needed to do what Negan wanted him to do and not get in any trouble. He didn’t want his face burnt off like Dwight’s. He valued his face, thank you very much. You really liked Frank in the end. Really liked spending time with him. He was mostly nice to you and if Negan trusted him, naturally, you grew to trust him. You nodded and backed up. You smiled. “Will he play tic-tac-toe with me!?” You exclaimed. Negan chuckled. “I don’t know. Why don’t you go ask him? He’s in the kitchen.” A white smile appeared on your face as you walked over to the table and grabbed some crayons and paper. You ran back to Negan and hugged him, some of the supplies falling out of your arms. “Be safe.” You whispered. Negan slowly smiled and hugged back. “I will.” He said and patted your side. “Go have fun.” You nodded frantically and ran past Negan and down the hall until your room was out of sight. Negan shook his head and closed the door before he made his way out to the trucks, Lucille by his side.   The paper and crayons were in your arms as you looked around The Sanctuary for Frank. You first went to the kitchen, like Negan had said. You timidly walked over to one of the women who worked in the room and tugged on her shirt. “Ma’am?” You got her attention. “Where is Frank?” “I don’t know honey.” She said. She was an elderly woman with evident wrinkles and nearly white hair. “Maybe you should check his room.” You nodded. “Okay. Thank you.” You smiled and turned away before slowly walking out of the room and down the long halls again. After a while, you found the room and smiled. The door was open and Frank was inside, sitting in his chair and staring at the wall and eating some apple pieces from a bowl. You walked inside. “Hi, Frank.” You said with a smile. Frank looked over at you. “Oh, hi.” He said. “Can you play tic-tac-toe with me?” Frank sighed lightly and placed his bowl to the side and nodded. “Sure. I have nothing else to do anyway.” You smiled bright and ran over to him. You gave him a crayon and laid a sheet of paper in front of both of you. You drew a sloppy pound symbol and smiled. “I wanna be Xs.” “Okay, then I’ll be Os,” Frank said. For a while, the two of you played tic-tac-toe, sometimes Frank winning and the other times, he let you win. Whenever you won, you would smile and clap, and when you lost, you would tell Frank ‘good job’ and continue to the next game. After a while, Frank looked at the door. “Can you close the door (Y/N)?” He asked and pointed to it. “I wanna play...a secret game.” You cocked your head to the side, confused. “Secret game?” You got up and walked over to the door. You closed it and walked back over to Frank. You smiled. “What is the secret game?” Frank smiled slightly. “It’s a secret game.” He smiled. “It’s called ‘Doctor’.” You giggled. “That’s not a secret game.” You said. “Yes, it is. It’ll be our little secret game, okay? So that means you can’t tell anyone or else people will take our idea!” He said. “Oh! Okay.” You said and smiled. “What do I do?” “Okay, go ahead and go lay down on the bed.” You nodded rapidly and ran to the bed. You giggled and bit your lip. Frank got off of the chair that he sat on and limped over to you. He looked down at you and smiled brightly and, slightly, wicked like. “And remember what I told you?” He asked. “Don’t tell anyone or else they’ll steal our game.” You said and smiled brightly. “We don’t want anyone to steal our game.” Frank nodded. “Good girl.” You beamed at the nickname. “Alright.” Frank cleared his throat and looked down at your small body. “Hello (Y/N).” Frank had changed his voice to make it sound entertaining to you. Strange, silly, and deep. You giggled. “I’m Dr. Frank.” “Hi, Dr. Frank.” You said and moved your fingers a bit to express your excitement of the secret game you were playing. “I hear that you’re in here for a check-up,” Frank said and placed his hands on your stomach. “Have you been eating healthy?” You giggled. “Yes, Dr. Frank.” You said. “I eat a million apples a day.” “A million apples? Do you want to get rid of me that much? An apple a day keeps the doctor away, you know that right.” He said. “So, with every apple you eat, you won’t get to see me.” You gasped dramatically and placed one of your hands over your mouth. “Oh no. No more apples for me.” You said and crossed your arms. Frank couldn’t help but chuckle at your innocence. “Alright.” He told you. “I need to examine you, though. Is that okay?” You nodded. “Yes.” It was then that Frank began his ‘examination’. You figured that it was going to be tickling underneath your knees and neck and all other playful touches. Only...they weren’t playful touches. Sure, it may have started out like that, with a small tickle here and a small tickle there, but it ended with his fingers trailing to places you were always told were your own, special places. Your no-no spots. Frank started with your arm, just barely giving them the time of day. Same with your legs and your feet. It started at your stomach when he moved his fingers high - way too high for your liking - to your chest and began to touch your flat chest, and then eventually had his fingers wander to your pelvic region. They weren’t brief like any other region. Those touches lingered for way too long. After he began to touch those spots, you frowned and looked at him with a blank stare. A part of you was scared. Scared of the person you were supposed to trust. That Negan trusted. It didn’t even matter that the touches were above the clothing that you wore. It still felt dirty. It made you feel dirty. It made you tired. Made you sad. Made you want to crawl into a corner and ignore everything that day and a part of you didn’t know why. Why did the touching make you feel like that? Why did it somehow feel wrong? You didn’t know. You did know, however, that after he was done with the examination and put his hands to the side, you were happy - although you didn’t really show it on your face - and sat up a little too quickly. Frank chuckled. “Good job (Y/N).” He said. “You were such a good girl.” Normally, you would have smiled at the compliment, but you didn’t. “Do you want a treat for being so good?” He asked. You looked up from the bed and cast a look up at Frank. You shook your head. “No thank you.” You said and slid off of the bed. You rubbed your shoulders. “I’m...pretty tired.” Frank frowned and then replaced it with a smile. “Okay.” He said. “Remember what I told-” “Don’t tell anyone. We want to keep it a secret game.” You told him in a timid and quiet tone of voice. “Good girl,” Frank said again and laid on the bed. “Come back if you wanna play again or if you need anything.” “Okay.” You whispered and walked out of the room. Once you were out of sight of the door, you ran to your room and closed the door. Why were you crying? Why did you feel so dirty after the touches? Wasn’t Frank someone that was good? So why did it make you feel like that? All those questions were running through your head as you walked over to your bed, drew the curtain on the window that was right above your bed so that your room was wonderfully dark, and you laid down. You covered yourself up from head to toe and felt the tears continue to flow with a gigantic confusion as to why it was so. All you wanted to do was to go to sleep and forget it all. Forget the dirty. Forget the wrong. Eventually, you did just that. The sleep part, that is. The forget part was something that seemed like merely an illusion. Negan walked through the hallways of his home, Lucille by his side. The supply run was successful. He and his men had come back with a great amount of food, weapons, and some clothing. Negan even found a small toy, a stuffed Bengal tiger, for you. He carried it in his opposite hand that he held Lucille in. He walked to your bedroom door and knocked on it. He waited. Nothing. He opened the door slowly and peeked in. The room was unusually dark. He furrowed his brows. “(Y/N)?” He asked softly as he walked into the room. He saw the lump in the bed and walked over to you. He knelt down and shook you slightly.”(Y/N)?” He asked. You whimpered slightly and opened your eyes. You looked at Negan and felt a small smile appear on your face. “Hi.” You told him. “Hi princess.” He said and ran his fingers through your hair. You smiled at the familiar touch. “How are you?” “Good.” “That’s good. Did you have a good time with Frank?” There was a great deal of hesitation before you spoke. “Yes.” You said. “Fun.” Negan chuckled. “You still tired?” He asked. You giggled, looked down, and nodded. “Yes.” You said, despite the fact that you were far from exhausted after that - how long was it? - nap. “Well, I got you something on the supply run.” Negan said and pulled out the stuffed animal from behind his back. You gasped and took gift graciously. “Thank you!” You said and hugged Negan and the tiger. “I’m going to call her Cheeto.” “Cheeto? Why Cheeto?” Negan chuckled. “Because she’s orange.” You said and giggled. “And Cheetos are orange!” Negan laughed again and kissed your cheek. You giggled. “Can we hang out now?” Negan smiled warmly and nodded. “Sure.” He said and picked you up. “Come on, let’s go.” With that, Negan carried you - and Cheeto - out of your room. You spent the rest of the day together, never leaving his side until he tucked you into bed and closed the door for the night, leaving you in your room to cuddle up with your new friend and hoping that he was able to protect you while you slept that night.   Weeks had gone by, maybe two, or maybe three, and the touches between you and Frank were getting worse and worse as the days went on. For the first couple of days, he was doing what he did on the first day you played your little ‘game’ - touching your privates over whatever clothes you did have. However, eventually, it got to sneaking touches underneath your shirt and waistband. It then progressed to taking your shirt off, then your shorts off - leaving our panties on - but then it increased to you being fully naked when he ‘examined’ you. Sometimes you were on his lap and other times you were just lying on the bed and watching as he touched you. After every session with him, you would go back to your room and go to sleep. As it got more and more intense with the touches, though, you decided to shower every time Frank was done with you. You felt so dirty after those touches that it would keep you up at night, give you nightmares, and make you cry until your eyes would burn with the salty tears that would fall down your cheeks from the horrible remembrance of the events. A part of you was scared to tell anyone. You didn’t want to get in trouble. You remembered kids in your school, before the world went to hell, getting in trouble with the other kids because they told on another kid. Because it ‘wasn’t cool to tattle tale on anyone else’. Who would believe a kid anyway? Frank was Negan’s left-hand man. The second most trusted person behind Simon. Simon. You had a pretty decent relationship with Simon. Despite the fact that he looked like he had gone crazy with power, you trusted him. He had always been good to you and, if Negan didn’t bring you back anything, Simon would. It had crossed your mind to talk to Simon about Frank, but you would always back out when you were getting ready to. Negan was out of the question too. He would get mad at you. You knew it. You have even dreamed of him yelling at you and threatening you with the bat. That damned bat. Lucille. It scared you half to bits despite the fact that you have seen her in action when it came to saving you. She always sent a shiver down your spine and the thought of Negan using her on you was a frightening one. So you figured that Simon was a better shot for the simple reason that he didn’t have Lucille by his side 24/7. You found Simon early one morning, eating by himself after he got some meat from the kitchen area. No one else was around besides some random citizens walking past to get their own food or make their way to some other location. “Hi, Simon.” You said in a timid voice and sat next to him. “Hey there (Y/N).” He said to you after swallowing a mouth full of sausage. “What’s up?” “Nothing much.” You said and rubbed your arm. “I...wanted to tell you something.” “Go right ahead,” Simon said, looking down at the food he had. “Um…..ugh.” You hesitated with small sounds that replaced words. You rubbed your hands against one another before looking down timidly. “There’s this...game that Frank likes to play. I don’t like it, though, but I let Frank play it because he likes it.” Simon looked up and then at you. “Game? What game?’ “He calls it the Doctor game.” You said and slowly began to kick your feet slightly. “He plays a doctor and I am the patient. Then he gives me a checkup. But...he touches me.” You blushed, slightly ashamed of what you were saying. “Sometimes he makes me take off my clothes.” Simon raised his brows and set his food aside. “Wait, are you saying he’s raping you?” He asked. You looked at him with furrowed brows and eyes filled with a mixture of confusion and fear. “What’s rape?” Simon stared at you with a blank stare for a couple of seconds before he abruptly stood up and grabbed your hand, dragging you along with him as he walked. “W-Where are we going?” You whimpered. “We’re going to talk to Negan.” He said. Your eyes widened and shook your head. “No, no.” You whimpered and tried to tug your hand out of  Simon’s strong grip. “P-Please.” Simon ignored your words and continued to take you down the hallways of The Sanctuary until you got to Negan’s room. Simon didn’t even bother knocking on the door - like he normally would have. He just barged into the room. Negan jerked up from his chair. “What the fuck is the meaning of this?” He asked. He looked down and saw you behind Simon. He frowned. “Is something wrong?” “Actually, there is,” Simon said. “(Y/N) just told me something about your left-hand man.” Simon crossed his arms. Negan frowned deeper as he looked at you. He reached his hand out to you. “What’s wrong (Y/N)?” He asked. You sniffled and felt tears appear in your eyes. “I-I’m sorry. I-I told Simon about the game. S-S-S-Sorry.” You sniffled. “Woah, woah, calm down (Y/N). What game are you talking about?” “The game that Frank and I play! I don’t like it! He told me not to say anything or else people will take the idea.” You sniffled and sobbed. “He’s a doctor and he touches me.” Negan slowly frowned. “What do you mean?” “He asks me to get naked and touches me...all over.” You spoke softly. “I’m sorry.” You sniffled and sobbed. You buried your face in your hands. Negan’s jaw visibly clenched as he stood up and grabbed Lucille tightly and stormed out of the room. You looked up and at Simon. “Is N-Negan mad at me?” You asked. Simon shook his head. “Why would he be mad at you? You did nothing wrong.” “I-I told you about the game.” You said and walked to him. “And that’s a good thing.” Simon sighed. “Look, kid, I’m not-” Shouts were heard echoing through the halls and it made you jump. You looked at the open door. You ran out with Simon following after you. You looked around and slowly followed the screams and shouts and curses. It wasn’t until you got to the large room near the open furnace. You hated that area. That was where Negan took people to punish them with the iron. It was there that you saw Negan with Frank in at the ground in front of him and a large crowd of the Saviors gathering around him. Everyone was chattering amongst each other, confused about the current situation. You stood above all of them, on the walkway. Simon stopped right next to you and watched the sight unravel. Negan paced around Frank, who had a confused look on his face. The doctor was near. “What is this about, Negan?” Frank asked. Negan glared at Frank and kicked him in the leg. Frank cried out in pain. “You tell me.” Negan said. “Because I found out something and it makes me super fucking pissed.” He said. “W-What are you talking about?” Frank asked. “You know (Y/N), right?” “What kind of question is that? Of course, I know her.” Frank said and held his leg. Negan kicked it again. “A simple yes or fucking no would have been good.” Negan said. Frank cried out in pain. Negan paced around and looked at the people around. “Right under everyone’s fucking noses, this piece of fucking horse shit was touching my little girl.” He growled. “Raping my little girl.” You raised your brows at what Negan said. He never called you his little girl before. Never. Sure, he treated you like his own flesh and blood that it surprised you to hear him call you that to everyone. It couldn’t help but put a small smile on your face. Everyone was looking at each other and some were speaking softly. Frank looked at Negan with wide eyes. He shook his head. “I never touched her.” He said and looked around at the individuals that surrounded him like moths to a light. He caught a glimpse of you and glared at you. Maybe it was the adrenaline that was shooting through him from the pain, but people in The Sanctuary will never understand the words that came out of his mouth next. “That bitch was lying.” Negan clenched his jaw tightly and gripped onto the handle of Lucille. He swung with all of his might until the barbed bat came in contact with Frank’s skull. He called out in pain. You yelped and covered your eyes, the sounds still running through your ears. You buried your face into Simon’s leg. “Don’t you dare fucking talk about her like that.” Negan said as he smashed Frank’s head in again. Frank called out in pain. “I may be a rude motherfucker, but I don’t go around touching kids.” He said and swung again. “I trusted you.” He swung. “You were my left-hand man!” He swung. “You’re a sick, twisted, disgusting fucker!” Negan shouted. He swung continuously, even when the skull of his left-hand man was caved in and was practically turned into a giant puddle of mush. He grunted over and over with each swing of Lucille. People were backing away from the scene but still stayed, not wanting to piss Negan off any more by leaving. Once he had let out his anger, when his arms were sore and felt like falling out, he turned to every single person that was in the room. “Let this be a lesson to all of you. No one touches (Y/N). No one touches any children, do we understand?” He asked, panted, and let his arm fall down to his side. The people around nodded and replied with a ‘yes sir’. Negan nodded to all of them. “Good.” He said. “Now go. All of you.” The Saviors immediately scattered and went about their days as if they didn’t see Negan kill Frank. Like it was a normal day again. You peeked out from behind Simon and looked at Negan, who was still panting. He rubbed the back of his head and walked up the stairs. He looked up and saw you. He frowned. “I didn’t think that you were up here.” He said and sighed. He walked up and stood by you and Simon. He looked at Simon and gestured for him to leave. Simon quickly nodded and walked away. Negan then knelt down in front of you. “I’m sorry (Y/N).” He said. You sniffled and nodded as you wrapped your arms around him tightly. “You called me your little girl.” You said. Negan raised his brows and nodded. “Yeah.” He said and cleared his throat. “Um...sorry about that.” He mumbled. “No.” You shook your head. “I don’t mind.” You gave him a small smile. “You’ve been really nice to me since you found me. Very nice. And...and cool.” You hugged him tighter. “I love you.” You said to him. Negan raised his brows. It didn’t take long before he slowly smiled and hugged you back. “I love you too (Y/N).” When the hug was over, you pulled away. “Can...can we go play tic-tac-toe?” “Of course we can.” Negan said as he stood up. You smiled up at him and Negan took your hand. The two of you then made your way back to your bedroom, Lucille tossed over Negan's shoulder nonchalantly. And, for the first time since you met the bat, you absolutely loved her. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!