Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/237402. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Supernatural_RPF Relationship: Jensen_Ackles/Jared_Padalecki, Jensen_Ackles/Tom_Welling Character: Chad_Michael_Murray, Michael_Rosenbaum, Jeffrey_Dean_Morgan Stats: Published: 2008-03-02 Words: 47761 ****** Stretch Right Up And Touch The Sky ****** by felisblanco Summary Jared’s life changed forever the day Jensen transferred to his school two years ago. It must have been destiny that brought them together because Jensen was without a doubt meant to be his forever soulmate and the love of his life. Too bad Jensen had no idea Jared even existed. Notes Thanks and huggles to [[info]] winchesterxgirl for the beta and the awesome banner. Written for the [[info]]abouttwoboys fic challenge. The movie I chose was Kærlighed_ved_første_hik!_(Love_At_First_Hiccup) which is a Danish romantic comedy, based on a book by the same name, written by Dennis Jurgensen. In some cases I went rather with the book version than the movie, simply because it was funnier or fitted the story better. Also, fitting a Danish story into an American setting was way harder than I thought it would be! Lol Title from the song In The Summertime with Mungo Jerry. Characters: Virgin!Jensen and Clumsy!Jared, with asshole!Tom (it’s a dirty job but someone has to do it), wimp!Mike (sorry), best friends Chris, Steve and Chad, clueless!Sandy, thinks-he’s-funny!Jeff and the Al-Qaeda little brothers Ben and Cody plus some rather exasperated parents and other minor characters. Warnings: High school AU. Underage drinking and sexin’ (Jared is 15/16), smoking of some questionable substances and a whole lot of dirty talk. *g* Disclaimer: If Jensen and Jared had been in high school together I’m sure this would have happened. Unfortunately they weren’t. *pouts* [http://pics.livejournal.com/felisblanco/pic/000p42tk] Banner by [[info]]winchesterxgirl Remember those lame writing assignments set by tired old teachers that have been teaching for thirty odd years and can’t for the life of them come up with something original even if their life depended on it? Instead it’s all, “What did you do last summer?” or “Where do you see yourself ten years from now?” Totally boring and lame assignments that have everyone groaning and then lying their asses off? Yeah. Well, when Jared sat down an early Monday morning in May and the board read, “An event that changed my life. 1000 words,” he for a brief moment contemplated for once telling the truth. Only for a moment and then his brain kicked in and instead he cracked his knuckles and made up a soppy story about a kid in his neighborhood being run over by a car and how that taught him to never take life for granted. Teachers loved sentimental shit like that. Now, if he’d told the truth… If he’d told the truth the story would have started something like this: “My life changed forever the day Jensen Ackles transferred here from Richardson two years ago.” He wouldn’t have been the only one. Seems the whole school was swept off its feet the day the Boy Wonder aka Jensen Ackles entered it for the first time. Within hours everyone was whispering about him and straining their necks, trying to catch a glimpse of him over the crowd. Well, at least there Jared had an advantage. For the first time in his life he thanked God and his dad’s good genes that he was “as tall as a motherfucking mountain” as Chad would say. Chad being… Never mind, we’ll get back to him later. We’re having a Jensen moment here, ok? So, Jensen, yeah. It was hard to explain what exactly it was that had everyone tripping over their own feet and walking into doors whenever the guy walked by. Sure, he was good looking – Jared would say beautiful in his girlier moments – with those bright green eyes that shone like emeralds and lips plump as… plums and eyelashes that would make any doe proud. (So Jared might have been reading one of his mom’s romance novels. He was bored, ok?) But it was more than that. The school had plenty of pretty – Jared considered himself quite handsome himself on his good days – but Jensen, he had something different. Something much, much more. Jared’s mother’s lady magazines would call it charisma. Sex appeal. Hotness incarnated. (So Jared might have read a few of those too. Stop judging him!) It was like… the guy walked into a room and everyone’s eyes were instantly drawn to him. He was tall – not as tall as Jared but then again no one was as tall as Jared, not even Tommy even if he said he was. In his high heels maybe, Jared said sarcastically and rolled his eyes and Chad snorted – with dirt blond hair and strong arms and like the sexiest neck ever and, so yeah, he was kinda bowlegged. Like he’d grown up straddling a barrel, Chad had said and Jared had been forced to hit him. But it was cute, you know. Fucking sexy really. Made his ass look all perky and in those tight jeans it was… Jared blushed just thinking about it. So anyway, in the two years that had gone by since then, most people had gotten over their initial awe and now even managed to act almost normal around the guy. Not quite as many black eyes and stubbed toes anymore. Most people, but not Jared. It was kinda pathetic really. No, not kinda. It was very pathetic. Because in those two years not only had his infatuation grown to an almost obsession that made him lose his appetite and lie for hours in bed, dreaming up romantic scenarios where Jensen suddenly realized he loved Jared too and they ran away to breed puppies on a farm, kinda like they did in 101 Dalmatians (the animated version, not the creepy one with Glenn Close). But despite that, so far, he’d never even talked to the guy. In fact he was pretty sure Jensen had no idea he even existed. Pathetic, definitely. See, here’s the thing. Jensen was three years older than Jared, even if he was only two school years ahead. No one knew exactly why he’d been held back because of course the guy got perfect grades and never missed a single class. So he wasn’t like educationally challenged or anything. Chad said he’d probably been suspended for a year for blowing the principal’s son or something. As if. Jared was sure it was because he’d been injured saving a kitten from a burning building or something. Jensen was just the type who’d do that. But anyway, two or three years, whichever, in high school they made a huge difference. A freshman like Jared couldn’t exactly walk up to a junior and just, you know, talk. Let alone hit on him. And he was only fourteen at the time so even if he’d figured out the whole “I think I’m kinda gay” thing the minute he sat eyes on the legendary Jensen Ackles, he didn’t really have a clue what to do with that knowledge. However now that he was turning sixteen in a couple of months and Jensen was about to graduate in just a few weeks… Well, Jared was getting rather desperate. Also, he had this illness, you know. Like a brain deficiency, right? Even if Chad said he was making it up, he so wasn’t. It was like… Ok, so here was the thing. Jared was a talker. He liked to talk. Like a lot. And loud. And he didn’t always think through everything before it left his mouth either, just blurted out whatever entered his head, whenever it entered his head. Now in most cases this was not a problem. Like he could bullshit his way out of pretty much any corner the teachers put him in whether he knew anything about the subject or not. And he could come up with excuses and explanations for all the trouble he got himself into and most times he got away with it because he just sounded so damn convincing with the big earnest eyes and the bright smile. But, whenever Jensen walked into the room? Jared fell dumb. The not-speaking kind, not the stupid kind. Well, both really. Because if he managed to stutter a word or two they were usually along the lines of “Nice weather,” or “I have candy,” or something equally embarrassing that only made Jensen glance at him with this puzzled expression on his face which, even if it was insanely cute, wasn’t quite the look Jared was hoping for. “Dude, you’re so fried,” Chad snorted and pulled him away before he embarrassed himself further. “I’m not... What does that even mean?” Jared asked, annoyed as hell. “Fried?” “Fried. Every time Jensen Ackles walks into the room he electrocutes your brain.” Chad wiggled his fingers by his head and made a loud buzzing sound. “Fried, man.” “Your metaphors suck,” Jared told him. “But yeah, okay. He does do that. Fuck, what’s wrong with me?” “You’re gay?” “Funny.” Jared sighed and rubbed his temple. “Besides, that’s not wrong. In fact I’ve come to the conclusion it’s God’s gift to mankind.” Chad snorted. “What? You’re gonna save the world with blowjobs?” The good thing about Chad’s big head was that it was very easy to hit even if your aim was completely off because you were rolling your eyes at the same time. “Ow! What the fuck was that for?” “Ok, first? Shut up. I’m not looking for a career in cocksucking. That’s called prostitution, dickhead. Second…” Jared grinned. “If I wanted to save the world with blowjobs you bet I could. I have a great mouth.” “You’ve never sucked a dick in your life!” Chad pointed out but Jared caught him glancing at his mouth, pursing his own lips experimentally, and smirked. “No, but I eat a lot of ice cream and man,” he sighed dramatically “The cones make a great tool for practicing.” Chad groaned. “I did so not need to know that. And that still isn’t saving the world.” Jared shrugged. “I figure the world leaders could use some decent sex once in a while. Then they’d be much happier and wouldn’t be trying to blow each other up all the time.” Chad couldn’t argue with that. “Third…” Jared frowned. “There was a third. What was the third again? Oh yeah, third, I wasn’t talking about blowjobs, I was talking about the fact that by making me gay he reduced the chances of my stupid genes polluting the next generation by at least fifty percent.” He hid his face in his hands. “Seriously, what is wrong with me?” “You’re too stressed out, that’s what,” Chad diagnosed. “We need to get you mellow, Jaredina. Just drunk and stoned off your ass and then lock the two of you up in a room together.” “Funny. That’s funny. That’s…” Jared stopped and stared at Chad. “You’re not joking.” “Nope.” Chad grinned. “What here? In school?” “No, you moron.” Chad slung one arm over Jared’s shoulders, a devious look on his face. “We throw a party, man. Lots of beer and buzz and before you know it? Bam, he’ll be de-virginising your ass.” “Dude, he’s a senior. Why on earth would he want to come to a sophomore party?” Chad tapped his nose. “Leave that to me, loverboy.” Jared groaned but for the first time in forever he felt something akin to hope. See, the thing about Chad… The thing about Chad was that he was a douche and a dickhead and had the tact of a walrus but if you needed someone to hook you up with beer or weed or, you know, a dirt-cheap iPod which may or may not have someone else’s name engraved on it, Chad was your man. A very annoying, foot-in-mouth-diseased, can’t-dress- himself-even-if-his-life-depended-on-it man, but with the resources of a small time criminal. Really, if you only had one friend in high school, that was the friend to have. So when Chad texted him, “Fday 8 BYOB”, Jared couldn’t help the butterflies in his stomach doing a little dance. Of course there was no guarantee Jensen would actually be there, even less guarantee that he would even notice Jared unless he wore a t-shirt that said “Jensen Ackles, please marry me!” and nothing else, but after almost two years of pining and getting nowhere, Jared was ready to grab whatever straws life, or rather Chad, handed him. Which was why seven o’clock on the next Friday night, Jared found himself pounding on the bathroom door, towel in hand and nerves threatening to shatter. “Ben, you shithead! You’ve been in there for half an hour! What the fuck are you doing?” “What do you think I’m doing?” came the sarcastic reply, sporting far more innuendo than a twelve year old really should be capable of. “I have to take a shower so hurry the fuck up,” Jared bit back, gritting his teeth. “Think I might have to take one too after this,” Ben said cheerfully as he flushed the toilet and then opened the door. He poked Jared’s stomach with the rolled up magazine in his hand and raised an eyebrow. “Dude, you’ve got to get some new material. I’m getting tired of the same old faces. Not that I really look at their faces, if you know what I mean.” He leered in a way that would have had Mother Theresa knowing exactly what he meant. Jared wrenched the magazine out of Ben’s hand and slapped him over the head with it. “You can buy your own porn, Ben. Now get the fuck out so I can take my shower.” Ben flipped him the finger but then he looked at Jared speculatively. “Why you taking a shower anyway? You got a date?” At Jared’s startled deer-in-headlights look Ben’s grin split wide open. “Dude, you’ve got a date! Fucking, eh! Mom!” he hollered down the hall. “Jared’s got a date!” Jared grabbed him by the shoulder and pushed him out of the doorway. “Shut up! And it’s not a date, it’s just a party at Chad’s.” “Ooh, can I come?” “Let me think… Uh… No.” Jared shut the door in his little brother’s face and breathed out. The little vermin was a menace. And probably brain damaged, with all the porn he kept stuffing into his head. Seriously, it wasn’t normal. When Jared was twelve he used to play with Lego's and read comic books. Ben on the other hand… People who came to visit usually mistook Ben’s room for Jared’s because his walls were covered in posters of half naked girls in various skanky positions. Very disturbing. Jared’s room on the other hand had posters with puppies and sport stars and the occasional horror movie. He was kind of a movie buff, although Chad said that term didn’t really apply when talking about sawed-off limbs and splattered brain matter. Whatever, it was still art, just different art. Bloody, gory art. Culture with a cleaver. Their mother hated both their rooms, although for different reasons, and refused to set her foot inside. Which suited Jared just fine, he wasn’t really ready to have her run across his nude male photograph collection or “The Ultimate Anal Sex Book.” Just because Chad knew Jared was gay didn’t mean he was ready to tell his parents yet. Especially not if it meant Ben finding out. Like he said, Ben was a menace. Which was why he kept his drawers locked at all times. Their mother had tried to put her foot down about Ben’s pornographic decorating but it only resulted in Ben giving her an hour long rant about freedom of speech and how the beauty of the female form being frowned upon was the result of male suppression of women’s right to express their physical presence in the media and that really she should be proud of how open-minded and appreciative Ben was of female beauty in light of how he was being brought up in a home dominated by men and maybe if she didn’t work so much he wouldn’t have to surround himself with pictures of other women. She never mentioned it again.   It was getting scarily close to eight when Jared finally felt he might be ready. He’d changed his shirt like five times and had started to wonder if maybe Chad was right, maybe his closet held a little too much pink. It wasn’t a gay thing though, really, pink just went very well with his complexion. Made him look all tanned and stuff. Besides he was tall and manly enough to pull off pink, gay or not. He checked himself in the mirror for the umpteenth time, taking in the final look. The jeans hung just low enough on his hips to look like they might slide down any second and they showed off his ass in an exceptionally flattering way. The t-shirt, not pink but black, was tight enough to show off the muscles he’d been working on like crazy for the last year, possibly with the hope that Jensen would notice. The leather jacket was short enough to make sure it didn’t obscure his ass and made his shoulders look really broad and manly. Well, he thought so anyway. He’d tried his best to fix his hair so it resembled anything close to a fashionable style but had to admit defeat in the end when it refused to budge from its usual shaggy look. Thankfully he had great hair. Everyone loved his hair. Well, his mom did. And Sandy. She loved his hair a little too much. He should probably tell her about the gay thing before she really embarrassed herself with all the flirting. He hesitated for a minute but then grabbed the cologne he’d gotten for Christmas and but a few drops on his palm before rubbing them into his cheeks. “Dude, what kind of party are you going to? Rent-A-Boy?” Jared turned around and glared at Ben who was leaning against the doorway, smirking obscenely. “Shut up. Don’t you have homework to do?” “It’s Friday, moron. And I’m waiting for Cody. We’re gonna watch Debby Does Dallas and jerk off on your bed.” “You do that and I’ll tell mom what really happened to her curling iron.” Ben froze and then he turned around and marched straight into his room, slamming the door behind him. Jared grinned. Oh the joys of incriminating photos. Even if he was ten minutes late he was still the first to arrive. Chad was putting up the sound system in the basement and as Jared opened the door Nine Inch Nails’ Closer blared out of the speakers, making him step back and blink from the mere force. Chad looked up and a wide grin spread across his face. “Hear that?” he shouted. “You get him on the dance floor, I’ll play this and if he still doesn’t get the point he’s definitely retarded.” He turned up the volume even further, grabbed Jared by the neck and started to grind up against him, singing badly along into Jared’s ear, “I wanna fuck you like an animal. I wanna feel you from the inside.” Jared pushed him off, blushing deep red. “Are you fucking insane? No! You do that and I’ll kill you, man.” Chad laughed and grabbed the remote, turning the volume down again. “Dude, don’t be such a virgin. C’mere.” He opened the small fridge and pulled out a beer, handing one over. “Drink this now, then we’ll light up a joint and by the time he gets here you’ll be all mellow and ready to have him pop your precious cherry.” “Dude, I swear, if you do something stupid I’ll…” “Thank me? Trust me, Jarhead, you’ll remember tonight for the rest of your life.” Jared sighed but lifted the beer and emptied half of it in one go. He burped loudly and then asked, “What did you do? How do you know he’ll be here?” Chad shrugged. “Someone stole his cell phone a couple of days ago. I told him I could get it back for him if he came over tonight.” Jared raised one eyebrow at him. “And how’re you gonna do that?” “Well…” Chad fished a phone out of his pocket. “Wanna go through his text messages, see if he has a girlfriend?” he asked smugly. “Dude, you did not! Chad, you fuckhead, tell me you didn’t steal his phone!” “Ok, I didn’t steal his phone.” Chad grinned. “I borrowed it. So, you want to check it out or not?” “I’m not… Oh fuck. Give it.” He grabbed the phone from Chad’s hand, ignoring his triumphant grin. It was a nice phone, one of those that played videos and music and could pretty much do anything except cook you breakfast. The wallpaper was a picture of a black car which was a bit odd, but whatever. At least it wasn’t Jessica Simpson. Jared scrolled through Jensen’s contacts first. Apart from the obligatory Mom and Home there were a lot of guy names. Chris and Cody and Jeff and Steve and Tom to name a few. Jared recognized some of them as the friends Jensen usually hung out with and Cody sounded familiar as well but Jared couldn’t remember from where. There were some girl names, Danneel and Kristen and Sophia, but there weren’t like little hearts next to them or anything, like Jared had done to Jensen’s name on his own phone. Not that he’d ever called him – as if! – but just looking at Jensen’s name on his contact list always gave him a funny feeling in his stomach. Chad had found him the number and then teased him endlessly about not having the balls to actually call. There weren’t that many text messages. Apparently Jensen had OCD or something and deleted them as soon as he’d read them. Not like Jared who usually didn’t bother until his inbox was full. There was one from Tom saying “Where the fuck r u?” and another from the girl called Kristen that read “Had 6 last nite. \o/” which pretty much excluded her as Jensen’s girlfriend unless she thought he’d forgotten. There were a few others, mostly about homework and what time he was supposed to come home but nothing that screamed ‘loving girlfriend’. Or boyfriend. See, here was the thing. What if the guy wasn’t even gay or bi or interested in anything involving dick? Just the thought had Jared close to tears. Really, the guy was way too pretty to be straight but stranger things had happened. And if it turned out Jensen was a straight up tits guy? Jared’s life would pretty much be over. “So, find anything?” Chad asked and drained his beer. “Strange encounters of the gay kind in his diary? Anything like that?” Jared flipped him off but checked the calendar anyway. Dentist appointment on the fourth, math test on Monday. Nothing exciting. For all his beauty and charisma the guy’s life was as dull as anything. On a whim Jared flipped forward until July. The 19th, his birthday, was labeled with a question mark. Jared stared at it for a moment, his stomach tightening but then he shook his head, laughing at his own stupidity. A coincidence, that’s all. Why on earth would Jensen mark Jared’s birthday? The guy didn’t even know who he was! He was shaken out of his musings by the doorbell chiming and frantically shut off the phone, handing it to Chad. “Here, take it. I’ll go get the door.” “Dude, wait.” Chad grabbed his arm and turned him around, shoving a fat joint in between his lips. “Take a deep drag.” Jared did, sucking the sweet smoke into his lungs before letting it out again. Then coughed with tears in his eyes as he made his way upstairs. Chad really knew how to score the good stuff. Sandy stood outside the door, beaming up at him as he pulled it open, with two of her friends standing behind her, looking only a little less enthusiastic. “Hi, Jared!” she said happily and gave him the once over, eyes gleaming. “Wow, you look great.” “Uh… you too.” Her smile grew even wider and he cursed himself silently. He really needed to tell her about the gay thing. “Let me get your coats, girls. The party’s downstairs.” The girls giggled and slipped out of their jackets and coats, showing off bare shoulders and more cleavage than Jared ever remembered seeing before. Sandy cocked her head and ‘accidentally’ slipped one strap off her shoulder. Jared sighed. This was going to be a long night. An hour later he was growing desperate. And very, very drunk. Not to mention high. First he drank and smoked because he was nervous and to avoid talking to Sandy. Then because the buzz made him happy and mellow. But in the end he was hitting it hard because he was getting more and more depressed as the night went on. Because guess what? Jensen wasn’t coming. Why would he? The guy probably had plenty of money and had just bought himself a new phone. This whole thing was stupid. Chad was stupid, the party was stupid and Jared was beyond doubt the stupidest guy in the world. Fuck. The doorbell rang once more and Jared scowled, ascending the stairs with the grace of a drunken giraffe. Seemed Chad had invited all the girls in school and it was starting to look like the Playboy Mansion downstairs. If Jared had been straight he’d been in heaven. As it was…If any more girls told him he was cute and pinched his ass? He was going home! “Welcome to the Hugh Hefner Estate,” he said sarcastically as he opened the door. And froze. “Erm… Hi. This is Chad’s place, right?” Jared blinked, his brain seeming to be set on ‘pause’ mode. “I think so,” he finally managed. “You think so?” Jensen’s lips twitched slightly at the corner. “Isn’t he like your best friend or something? You’re pretty much joined at the hip at school.” “Uh… Yeah.” Jared nodded slowly. “Sorry ‘bout that.” Another twitch, turning the lips slightly more upwards. “About him being your best friend?” “No, I mean, uh, yeah. That too.” Jensen quirked one eyebrow and Jared stared back. His knees felt a little like Jell-O. “So…” Jensen finally said after a long awkward silence. “Chad? Is he here?” Jared gazed at him, blinking slowly. Then his brain finally kicked in and he stepped back, blushing deeply. Crap. “Yeah. Yeah. Yes, of course. Downstairs. Come on in. Want me to take your jacket?” Jensen seemed to hesitate. “I wasn’t really gonna stay,” he finally said and glanced over his shoulder, as if someone was waiting for him. “We have beer!” Jared blurted out. “Lots and lots of beer. And weed. And most of the girls are legal.” “Well, hell. Why didn’t you say so already?” a loud voice drawled in the darkness and then a short guy pushed Jensen aside and glared up at Jared. “You gonna let us in, boy, or what?” “Uh…” Jared stared down at the guy he knew as Chris, Jensen’s best friend. “Sure. It’s down the stairs.” He stepped aside and Chris stomped by him. Jensen gave him an apologetic shrug and opened his mouth to say something but was again shoved aside, a bit gentler this time, by a long haired guy who gave Jared a smile before following Chris down. Jared sighed. Chad was so gonna kill him. “Sorry about that,” Jensen said and Jared turned his gaze back to him. “I think they can smell beer from a ten miles distance.” “It’s okay.” Jared tried for a smile. “As long as they leave a girl or two for Chad so he won’t kill me,” he added and motioned Jensen to come on in. “Don’t want one for yourself?” Jensen asked with a grin as he stepped inside and Jared ducked his head, blushing. “Not so much, no. They’re not exactly my type.” “What, too young?” Jensen joked and shrugged out of his jacket. He was wearing a soft v-necked sweater over a white t-shirt and the way it clung to his lean frame made Jared want to weep. And the jeans, oh God! Jared swallowed as he let his eyes wander down, taking in the way they hug Jensen in all the right places. He’d never been this close to Jensen before and the effect of his presence was making Jared weak in the knees. He looked up to find Jensen watching him, eyebrow raised in question and Jared rewound their conversation. Oh. He blushed even further. “More like too… girly. I’m not really into… I don’t… I mean, I’m kinda…” He swallowed. “I’m gay,” he said and held his breath. “Oh.” Jensen gave him an odd look. “Sorry.” Jared frowned. That wasn’t exactly the reaction he’d been anticipating. “Why? Is it bad?” Jensen started. “No, I didn’t mean… not like that. I mean, it’s cool. Great.” “Uh, okay.” Jared frowned and took Jensen’s jacket from his hands. It was soft leather and still warm from Jensen’s body. Jared fought the urge to bring it up to his face and inhale since he had a feeling he’d look like a psycho smelling panties. “Nice jacket,” he said instead, trying to ease the awkward moment. Jensen looked at him, puzzled. “Uh, thanks.” “Very… soft. And warm. I mean, it’s warm because you were wearing it. So I guess you’re hot. I mean warm! I mean…Smells good too.” He nodded frantically. “Think this is the nicest jacket I’ve seen all night.” Jensen frowned. “Are you high?” “Er… maybe?” There was a long silence. “Just… don’t drool on it,” Jensen said finally and threw him a last worried glance before heading downstairs. Jared slumped up against the wall, cracking the back of his head on the panel before burying his face in Jensen’s jacket with a groan. God, could he be any more of a moron? When he finally dared to go downstairs the party was in full swing. He spotted Jensen sitting with his friends on the couch, sipping beer and sharing a joint. He looked up when Jared came in, briefly meeting his eyes but then Chris said something in his ear and Jensen turned his attention back to his friends, leaving Jared feeling even more stupid than before. He made his way over to the makeshift bar where Chad was already twisting open a beer for him, which he accepted gratefully. “That bad?” “Total disaster,” Jared said and stole the joint from Chad’s lips, pulling in a deep drag before giving it back. “He still doesn’t know my name but he thinks it might be Drooling Idiot.” “What, you told him you think he has ‘emerald eyes and plumb lips’?” “Shut up. And no. I told him I’m gay and that his jacket smells good.” Chad pursed his lips tight in a futile effort to keep from laughing. “Oh man, you so suck at this.” Jared couldn’t really argue with that. “I do. I really, really do,” he sighed. “And I’m guessing he didn’t come out and say he liked cock too?” “Nope.” Jared rubbed his face tiredly. “He said he was sorry.” Chad frowned. “About what? About you being gay? What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked, shooting an oblivious Jensen a glare across the room. “I really don’t know,” Jared answered, feeling stupid and drunk and more hopeless than ever before. “Dude, the guy is clearly a dick. Forget about him, man.” “Yeah, maybe.” Jared glanced over at Jensen and his friends. Chris had a girl in his lap and Jensen was grinning at them as he sipped his beer slowly, Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. Jare groaned. He so hated his life. “And what’s with the escort, man? We don’t want seniors taking our women!” Jared opened his mouth to apologize but before he could say anything a chirpy voice yelled over the loud music. “Jared!” He turned around and got a lap full of Sandy, long arms wrapping themselves around his neck. “Hi, baby!” she chirped happily, obviously quite drunk. “Uhm,” he managed to get out and then he felt wet lips kissing his neck. Ok, this had gone on long enough. He pushed her away and tried to look stern. “Look, Sandy...” “Dude…” Chad warned but Jared ignored him. She was looking at him with big hopeful eyes and Jared grabbed his beer, downing the whole thing in one go before starting again. “Sandy, I like you, but…Hic!” His eyes went wide with panic. Oh fuck. “Jared?” “I… Hic!” The sound was like a hybrid between a burp and a cat being strangled. Chad grabbed his arm. “Dude, are you doing what it sounds like?” “Hic!” Jared said, helpless. “Oh man. Remember what happened last time?” “Hic, hic!” Jared nodded, mortified, and hid his face in his hands. Crap. “Four hours, man. If you hadn’t passed out you probably would have gone on forever.” “Hic you!” Jared cursed. “Help me wh-hic this!” “Hang on. I’ll fix this.” To Jared’s horror Chad turned off the music and grabbed the microphone. “Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your attention please? We have a problem.” He shoved the mic in Jared’s face. “Hic!” echoed throughout the surround system. The whole room burst out laughing and Jared felt his face go insanely hot. He was going to kill Chad for this. “This, my friends, is a young man with a serious problem. Last time he had one of those it lasted four hours. Four hours, people! Now, however fun it might be to see if he can beat that record, lets have pity on the boy and see if we can cure him instead? What do you say?” The room rose in a cheer and then various remedies were being shouted out, each more absurd than the other. First he was told to hold his breath and count to a hundred. He only made it to about fifteen before his counting was interrupted by a loud hiccup. Then someone suggested holding his head under water and to his horror Chad pulled a bucket from behind the bar table. “No!” “But…” “No fu-hicking way!” Chad pouted but put the bucket away. “Ok, next suggestion?” “Let me,” Sandy piped up and then slunk toward him, eyes batting suggestively and licking her lips. “Jared, honey? If you hiccup one more time I’ll kiss you, right here.” Jared blinked. “Hic, hic,” he said with a sigh and shrugged apologetically when Sandy gave him a hurt look. “Sorry.” “Next!” “Drink upside down!” someone shouted and before Jared knew what was happening he was being tipped over, long legs flailing in the air as he was propped up against the wall, and then a bottle of beer was put to his mouth and tilted. Beer rushed into his mouth, down his throat and into his nose and he sputtered, fighting to swallow as much as he could. He’d finally emptied the bottle when a new one took its place immediately and he started to panic. Drowning in beer wasn’t exactly the way he’d thought he’d go. “Cut it out,” a loud voice suddenly said. “Stop it, you morons. Let him go!” Jared fell hard down on his head when his legs were suddenly released, and he slid down the wall, ass in air. “Dude, you okay?” Jared blinked the beer out of his eyes and found himself staring straight up at Jensen’s upside-down face. “Hic!” he said miserably. “C’mon, let’s get you cleaned up,” Jensen said with a small smile and grabbed Jared’s arm, pulling him to his feet. “Although I hear beer is great for your hair.” “Hic!” Jared mumbled and wiped most of the beer off his face, a rather futile attempt considering it kept running down from his wet mop of hair. Jensen laughed and grabbed Jared’s wrist, dragging him along out of the room and down the small hallway beside the stairs. Jared was so horrified by the less than stellar impression he was making that it wasn’t until Jensen closed and locked the bathroom door behind them that Jared realized he was alone with the object of his rather obsessive affection. His dream had come true. And he was drenched in beer and hiccupping like a wino. God, could his life really get worse? “Hic, hic, hic!” he burped and yes, seems it could. Jensen only shook his head and laughed softly before tilting his head and looking at Jared thoughtfully. “Ok, first, take the t-shirt off before it gets even wetter.” “Hic!” Jared complied miserably and pulled the t-shirt over his head before checking it over with a pout. The neck was drenched and the rivers of beer that had been running down his back had left an ugly dark pattern. Damn. He shot Jensen a shy glance but he was busy by the bathtub, mixing the temperature of the handheld shower. “Come here,” Jensen said without turning around. “We need to wash most of it out or you’ll smell like a brewery. Bet your mom wouldn’t like that.” Jared groaned. “No-hic, she wou-hicn’t.” He got to his feet and walked over to the bathtub. “How we gonna do thi-hic?” Jensen threw him a glance and consequently dropped the showerhead. “Shit.” There was a short panicked moment as they both tried to catch the undulating hose, water spurting everywhere, before Jared pushed Jensen aside and practically threw himself on the damn thing, figuring if anyone was going to get soaking wet it better be him, seeing as he was half-naked anyway. He finally managed to grab the showerhead and for a moment they both stood breathing heavily, staring at the wet walls of the bathroom before Jensen burst out laughing, wiping drops of water off his face. “Hell, if I’d known it was this kind of party I’d have brought my bathing suit.” Jared forced down the image of Jensen in nothing but a pair of Speedos and threw him a grin instead. “Sorry.” “Hey, your hiccup’s gone!” Jensen pointed out and elbowed him. “Guess that drowning thing works after all.” “Hic, hic, HIC!” said Jared and they both groaned. “Then again maybe not.” Jensen sighed. “Ok, bend over.” Jared choked on the next hiccup and stared at Jensen in alarm. “What?” “Dude, you’re way too tall. If I’m gonna wash your hair you need to bend over. Or go down on your knees or something. I can’t reach you up there.” “But…” Half-naked on his knees, in front of Jensen? Bending over with Jensen standing over him? What the hell was in that weed and please could he have some more? “Hic?” He sank down to his knees and Jensen put a hand on his neck, pushing him down and forward. “Over the tub. Yeah, like this.” He took the handheld shower from Jared and aimed the flow at his head. “Not too warm, right?” “No-hic, it’s hic fine,” Jared answered and tried not to moan as Jensen’s fingers slid gently through his hair. God, this was better than any jerk-off fantasy he’d ever had! “Here, hold it.” The showerhead was once again thrust into Jared’s hand and then he heard the sound of a cap being popped off a bottle and the sweet smell of shampoo filled the air. The slightly cool liquid hit the top of his head and then Jensen’s fingers were back, rubbing it gently into his hair. Jared stopped breathing. Jensen Ackles was washing his hair. Jensen Ackles was washing his hair! If he died this very moment it would be the best death he could ask for. “Alright?” “Mngh,” he managed and then hiccupped for emphasis. Jensen chuckled. “You like that? That feel good?” “Nghic-hic!” Jared moaned and went promptly red. God, he sounded like a drunken whore. “I broke my arm once and my mom had to wash my hair for weeks. Was worth it for that alone.” ‘Bet your mom didn’t give you a hard-on though,’ Jared thought and tried to discretely press his thighs together. Dammit! Jensen took the shower away from Jared again and rinsed the shampoo out of his hair, fingers continuing to run through it as he pushed the suds away. When he finally turned the water off Jared felt close to passing out. He was panting shallowly, interrupted by high-pitched hiccups that shook his body. He kept his head bowed as Jensen rubbed his head with a towel, then told him to sit up. “There. Isn’t that better?” “Yeah-hic!” Jared agreed as he got to his feet and accepted the towel from Jensen’s hands, rubbing his hair and then wiping off the drops of water that had rolled down his chest and back. Jensen shook his head in amusement. His cheeks were faintly pink but then again it was rather hot in there with the steam and everything. “Man, your friend wasn’t kidding about that hiccup. You really had it for four hours?” Jared nodded. “My record is si-hix,” he added miserably. “That sucks.” Jensen grimaced. “How did you get it to stop?” “Passed out.” Jensen chuckled. “Well, we can’t have that.” He tilted his head, studying Jared thoughtfully. “Sit down,” he said finally. Jared sat dutifully down on the closed toilet seat, watching Jensen warily. He was suddenly painfully aware of the fact that he was wearing practically nothing but his jeans and that his hair was standing up in all directions and that all Jensen had to do was look down and nothing on earth could keep him from noticing the state Jared was in. Oh God. Slowly, and hopefully innocently, he draped the damp towel over his lap. Jensen seemed to be silently debating with himself, brow wrinkled in thought and teeth biting into his lower lip. Then he suddenly reached out and brushed the damp hair out of Jared’s eyes, tugging it behind his ears with a shy smile. “Ok, so here’s the deal,” he said and leaned in, gazing Jared straight in the eyes. “If you hiccup one more time, I’ll kiss you. Tongue and all.” Jared stared at him. The hiccup that had been making its way up his throat promptly turned around and went back to where it came from, leaving him gaping but utterly unable to make it return. “I…” Jensen grinned. “What’s that?” “I’m… Damn!” “Cured?” “Yeah,” Jared sulked. This really wasn’t fair. “Too bad,” Jensen said with a dramatic sigh. “I was really looking forward to that kiss.” He started to straighten up but suddenly he paused and looked back at Jared, licking his lips nervously. Then before Jared knew what was happening his head was tilted backwards and Jensen’s lips were against his and… they were kissing! What…? Oh God! It was everything he had imagined. Those lips really were made for kissing. They were soft and full and warm and actually nothing like plums at all. Jared whimpered and the sound made Jensen’s fingers tighten in his hair as he hitched his breath and then they were really kissing, mouths open and tongues sliding and Jensen holding Jared’s head between his hands as if he was afraid he’d disappear if he let him go. Just as Jared was about to move his own hands up to Jensen’s waist to try and pull him closer, Jensen suddenly jerked away, leaving Jared stupidly snapping at air like a goldfish. “I… Bet your friends are worried about you,” Jensen said roughly and cleared his throat. “Maybe you should get back in there.” “But…” Jensen ran a hand over his face and swallowed. “I need to get going anyway.” “But…” Jared repeated lamely then dropped his eyes. “Yeah, ok,” he mumbled, feeling so damn confused and about ten times the fool from before. “Your t-shirt…” Jensen looked around and his eyes fell on Jared’s t-shirt, lying wet in a puddle on the floor. “Oh. Crap.” “It’s ok. I’ll just…” Jared reached for his shirt and wound the water out of it into the bathtub. “I’ll be fine.” “No, you won’t.” Jensen seemed to hesitate and then he pulled the sweater over his head. “Hold this.” “What?” Jared took the thin sweater and only just resisted to lift it up to inhale the sweet smell of Jensen. “What are you…?” Jensen didn’t answer but took off the white t-shirt he was wearing underneath as well and handed it over with a curt nod. “This shouldn’t be too bad. Try it.” Jared stared at him. Then he silently took the t-shirt and pulled it on. It was rather tight around his shoulders but other than that it fitted perfectly. “Thanks.” “Yeah, well…” Jensen shrugged. “Can’t have you getting pneumonia.” He paused momentarily but then he opened the door and stepped out. “I’ll see you around. Jared, right?” Jared couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face. Jensen knew his name! “Yeah. Jared. And you’re Jensen.” Jensen smiled, the awkwardness melting away. “The hot one with the nice jacket,” he said teasingly and then closed the door, leaving Jared staring at it, red in the face. What had just happened? Jensen had kissed him! God, he’d kissed him and then… Then he’d just walked away. Had it been that bad? Jared licked his lips slowly. They felt slightly swollen, prickly, and the saliva from their kiss was drying at the corners of his mouth. It should be gross but Jared thought it was the hottest freaking thing ever. Proof that he hadn’t imagined the whole thing. Well, that and the t-shirt he was wearing. It was still warm from Jensen’s body and when Jared sniffed his shoulder it smelled like Jensen, a mixture of spices and cologne. It made him feel slightly faint. He was wearing Jensen’s t-shirt! God, Jensen had washed his hair and then lent him his t-shirt. Next to that a kiss seemed almost insignificant. Almost, but not quite. A grin spread across Jared’s face. Ok, so maybe he was a bad kisser. He could work on that. Somehow. Obviously Jensen had seen something worthy in him or he’d hardly gone through all this trouble. Also, guess he’d finally got his answer to the most important question of all. Jensen clearly had no problems with dicks. Yay! When Jared finally opened the door and peeked out he caught the footsteps of someone going up the stairs and paused in the doorway, not ready to face anyone just yet. His ears perked up when he heard a familiar drawl and he froze, straining to listen though he wasn’t sure if he really wanted to hear it. “You’re quite something, aren’t ya, Jenny? He’s a frigging kid, man,” Chris was saying, sounding more amused than appalled. “Shut up,” said Jensen’s voice. “Nothing happened. Just helping the poor kid out. With friends like that…” “Hey,” said a voice that had to belong to the other guy Jared was pretty sure was named Steve. “It’s not that we don’t like him, man. He’s damn cute, in his own illegal way, but… Tommy’s gonna kick your ass if he finds out.” “What, you gonna snitch on me?” Jensen asked sarcastically Chris laughed. “So there is something to snitch about?” “Fuck you,” Jensen bit back but there was amusement in his voice and Jared had a feeling that if he could see Jensen’s face it would be blushing. “Now that would really make Tommy mad. You know, because your boyfriend is such a big fan of mine to begin with.” The front door closed, muffling their voices and leaving Jared alone in the dark, heart racing in his chest. Tommy? As in Tom Welling, I’m-tall (but not as tall as Jared, ha!) and-rich- and-handsome-and-drive-my-own-BMW Tom Welling? He was Jensen’s boyfriend? Jensen had a boyfriend? Jared slid down the wall until his ass hit the floor. He wrapped his arms around his folded knees and buried his face in his shoulder and the smell of Jensen. Could his life really get worse? Something tickled in his chest and then ran up his throat. “Hic!” Jared groaned and stumbled to his feet. More alcohol was in order.   “Where’s your brother?” Jared could hear his mother asking in the kitchen when he finally crawled out of bed by noon the next day. “Am I my lame brother’s keeper?” Ben drawled dramatically. “Probably still in bed, emoing about dying a virgin. Seriously, mom, it’s embarrassing! I’m twelve and I’ve gotten more action than he has!” “Don’t talk like that!” their mother said just as Jared flung open the door and growled, “I heard that, you little punk!” Ben ducked from the arm aiming for his head and laughed. “Whatever, dude. So how was last night? Did you woe any chicks with your hooker clothes?” “Benjamin!” “What? I could have said, ‘Did you get any pussy?’ which… Ow!” “Benjamin Padalecki! I will not have that kind of language in my kitchen!” “Ok, ok. Sorry! Jeez!” Ben rubbed his ear and gave Jared a scowl like it was all his fault. Jared smirked and grabbed a couple of waffles from the plate. “At least tell me you got to see some tits... Ow! Stop hitting me, woman!” Jared poured himself a large glass of milk and left them to their arguing. He had a date with his bed, nursing his hangover and brooding about Jensen.   It was only half an hour later though that Ben barged into his room, a smile so evil on his face that Jared wondered for a moment if he’d fallen asleep and was having a Children of the Corn dream again. “What?” “So,” Ben said and closed the door behind him before leaning against it. “I was talking to Cody.” “Dude, what do I care what shit you talk about to your little friends.” Ben ignored him. “You remember Cody, right? Cody… Ackles.” Jared froze. “Seems his gay brother was at some party last night. Some lame sophomore party. And he got home late, missing a t-shirt.” Ben raised an eyebrow at Jared, which was when he realized what he was wearing. “Huh, that one looks new. And kinda small…” “Ben,” Jared warned although he knew he was completely busted. “No wonder you never got any chicks. Tsk, tsk.” Ben shook his head, smirking. “What do you know, we have a queer in the family. Wait ‘til mom and dad hear about thi-” Jared was up from the bed, tackling Ben to the floor before he had time to finish the sentence. “Shut up! Shut up!” he hissed, his heart hammering in his chest. “Let me go, pervert! Stop molesting me, you fucking homo!” Jared went still, his arm tight against Ben’s throat. “What did you say? What the fuck did you just say?” “I said…” Ben’s voice suddenly changed from mocking to scared when he finally caught the look on Jared’s face. “Hey, hey no! Dude, chill,” he wheezed, eyes widening. “I’m fucking kidding with you. Jared, c’mon!” He wriggled, trying to get loose, and tears started showing in his eyes. “You’re hurting me. Jared, please.” Jared took a deep breath and then stood abruptly up, turning his back on his little brother who scrambled to his feet, still breathing heavily. “You know what, fuck you. I put up with a lot from you, Ben, but not this. Not this.” He turned back, glaring at Ben. “Get out. Get the fuck out of my room.” Ben swallowed, lip wobbling and eyes glittering. “Jared, I swear. I didn’t mean it like that.” Jared shook his head. He felt slightly sick. “Yeah? Well, it sure sounded like you did. Why you think I haven’t told…” His breath hitched and he closed his eyes. “You wanna tell’em? You wanna go out there and laugh at this, make some big joke out of it? Go on then.” “No! Jared, please. I’m sorry,” Ben sobbed. “I didn’t mean it. I was only joking! I’m not like that!” “Will you just leave?” Jared kinda felt like crying himself and hell if he was going to let his little brother witness that. “I don’t care what you do. Just… go.” “Jared…” “Go.” There was silence for a long time and then he heard the door open and close quietly and he was left alone in the room. He threw himself down on the bed and bunched Jensen’s t-shirt up until he could bury his nose in the now sweat-damp material. Fuck, he hated his life. ------- “Tom?” Chad asked incredulous and wrinkled his nose. “Really?” “Yeah,” Jared said miserably and glanced over at Jensen and his group of friends. You wouldn’t realise just from looking at them but now Jared knew, he could see the possessive way Tom hovered over Jensen and the almost shy smiles Jensen sent back. It was sickening. Well, to him anyway. Damn Welling. “But he kissed you.” “Yeah, well…” Jared shrugged. “Didn’t mean anything. Guess he was drunk or something.” “But… Tom is such an asshole!” “I know.” “Huh. You think they’re doing it?” Jared groaned. “Oh God! Shut up!” “What? I didn’t say assfucking.” “Chad, seriously, shut the fuck up. As far as I’m concerned they aren’t even kissing, ok?” “I’m pretty sure they’re kissing…” “Dude!” “Ok, ok. Sorry.” Chad snapped his gum. “So who do you think bottoms? I bet Jensen bottoms. He’s kinda pretty like a girl anyway.” “Fuck you, I’m outta here,” Jared growled and stalked away, ignoring Chad yelling after him. The noise carried across the school lot and Jensen looked up, spotting Jared just as he was trying to hide behind a tree. He froze and then he offered Jared a small smile. Jared hesitated but then thought ‘fuck it’ and continued walking as if he’d always meant to walk over. “Hey,” he said nervously as he came close enough. “I mean, hi. Hi. I…” “Are you talking to us?” Tom cut in, raising his eyebrow mockingly. Jared hesitated. “I…” “The playground’s over there, kiddo.” Jared felt his face go red. “I’m not…” “Here.” Tom pulled out his wallet, plucked out a dollar bill and shoved it into Jared’s breast pocket. “Go buy yourself some milk.” “Don’t be such an ass, Tom,” Jensen said but he was smiling and when he met Jared’s eyes he just shrugged as if he didn’t care one way or the other about his friends treating Jared like shit. Chris gave him a strange look but just then the bell rang and soon Jared found himself standing alone in the school grounds, the dollar bill scratching at his chest through the thin material of his shirt. Fuck. “Dude, c’mon,” a voice said beside him and he looked up to find Chad giving him a sympathetic look. “I told you he’s not worth it.” “Fucking Welling,” Jared mumbled as he fished up the money and threw it to the ground. “Fuck him.” “Still think it’s the other way around but whatever.” Chad picked the bill up and pocketed it then clasped one hand on Jared’s shoulder. “How ‘bout we ditch class?” “And do what?” Jared muttered. “Hit the mall or something. Buy you some more gay shirts.” “They’re not gay! Pink is in, ok?” “Sure it is,” Chad yawned. “What you say?” “I have to pee first.” “Well, hurry up. I don’t want them to catch us before we even make it outside the school grounds.” “Yeah, yeah.” He hurried across the lot and slipped inside, making his way quietly along the now empty hallways and toward the restrooms. Once there he went about his business and was just about to flush when he heard the doors swing open. “Man, I don’t know…” said a voice that sounded vaguely familiar. “It doesn’t seem right.” “Wait. Check the stalls,” said someone Jared instantly recognized as Welling. He panicked and quickly turned the lock so it showed ‘unoccupied’ and then stepped up on the toilet to hide his feet. There was some shuffling and then the other guy said, “All clear.” “Ok. Look, it’s not like I’m gonna marry him or anything. It’s just fucking.” Him? As in Jensen him? Jared slowly stood up and peeked over the edge of the stall. Tom and that bald guy that sometimes hung out with him – Mike, Jared thought his name was – were huddled close as they talked in hushed voices. “But I thought we were…?” Mike asked, looking unsure. “I mean, you said…” “Yeah, yeah. Of course. Dude, don’t you trust me?” Jared rolled his eyes. He didn’t trust that lying son-of-a-bitch further than he could throw him and he was surprised Mike seemed to be falling for it. “I do. It’s just…” “I told you, he wants me to. Something about losing his virginity to someone who knows what he’s doing. Which you know I do,” Tom said with a smirk. “It’s just this once and then it’s you and me, baby.” God, what a creep! Jared fought to keep from jumping down from the toilet and pouncing on Tom. He imagined dunking that shaggy head into the toilet bowl or better yet, punching that irritating smirk right off Tom’s face. “Just once? You promise?” “Man, stop being such a worry ass.” Tom grabbed Mike by the neck and kissed him hard. “I promise you, after this Friday I’m all yours.” Jared waited until he couldn’t hear their footsteps anymore before slipping out of the stall, jaw clenched. He hurried out of the school building to where Chad was waiting behind the tree, grabbing his arm and dragging him away as fast as he could. “What the hell, man?” “Emergency meeting. We have a problem,” Jared said grimly and to Chad’s credit he didn’t ask, just picked up his speed. As soon as they’d put enough distance between them and the school, Jared quickly filled Chad in, his anger growing when he saw the skeptic look on his supposedly best pal’s face. “You’re serious,” Chad finally said. “Okay, you’ve finally lost what little sanity you had left.” “Dude, he’s totally cheating on him!” Jared sputtered, flailing his arms. “Jensen thinks they’re in love or whatever and all this guy wants is to pop his damn cherry!” “I’m having a hard time believing that boy is a virgin, man. I mean, have you seen his ass? I’m not gay and I’d tap that.” Chad shrugged. “What? I would.” “Dude! Who cares? We gotta save him!” “Let me get this straight. You want to save Jensen, who by the way is three years older than you and, you know, a pretty big guy, from being fucked in the ass by his boyfriend? Are you listening to yourself?” “He doesn’t love him!” “Oh Jesus. Jared…” “Are you gonna help me or not?” “I’m thinking not.” At Jared’s incredulous look he sighed. “Seriously, man. I’m not going on some Rescue Jensen’s Ass mission, especially not since I very much doubt he’d want his ass saved. You really think if you walk up to him and say ‘Hey, Jensen, don’t sleep with your boyfriend ‘cos he’s a big sleaze,’ that he’s going to thank you?” At which point Jared turned and left Chad standing on the sidewalk as he himself headed home to sulk. And plot.   Friday night found him lurking outside Jensen’s house. In the bushes. But not like a creepy stalker or anything like that. Not like he was ogling Jensen with binoculars or jerking off while watching him undress. No, he was being stealthy. And saving Jensen from having his heart broken. Yeah, that was it. A little after seven o’clock the front door opened and some people Jared assumed were Jensen’s parents came out, the less-than-popular Cody in tow. Jared and Ben hadn’t really spoken since that whole incident last weekend but for what it was worth Ben hadn’t spilled his secret either. It wasn’t that Jared really thought his parents would disown him or anything, it was just… Well, you never knew, right? He thought he’d better wait until he was eighteen and they couldn’t send him to Jesus camp or whatever. He watched the Ackles family sans Jensen get into their car and drive away. Hardly five minutes went by before Tommy’s BMW came purring along the road, parking outside Jensen’s house. Tom got out and strutted up to the house, then rung the bell. Only a few moments went by before the door opened and Jared caught a quick glimpse of Jensen, looking as gorgeous as ever, before Tommy stepped inside and closed the door behind him. Damn. What now? Jared eyed the house. He’d already figured out Jensen’s room was at the second floor, with his window on the right side of the house. He figured if he got a ladder he’d be able to see in. You know, if he was creepy like that. Which he wasn’t. He just… A couple of shadows played across the curtains in Jensen’s room. One of them took its shirt off. Oh fuck it. Jared jogged silently across the driveway and quickly found the ladder he’d spotted there when he’d been staking the place out the day before. Not like a stalker. He just liked being prepared, that was all. Raising the ladder against the house he made his way up as silent as he could, careful not to look down. He kinda had a thing about heights, which Chad said was ridiculous since he was ‘as tall as a fucking tree’ himself. It wasn’t a very long ladder, in fact Jared could hardly reach the windowsill when he’d climbed as high as he could go. Which meant he didn’t have anything real to hold on to once he got there but at the moment he couldn’t worry about that. Because straining his neck to peek over the windowsill into Jensen’s room he was met with the sight of Jensen, sitting on the bed, kissing that fucker Tom Welling! Which, ok, considering they were boyfriends wasn’t maybe such a shocker but it didn’t mean Jared had to like it! In fact he was liking it less and less the more intimate the kiss got because Tom? Was a grabby bastard. Hands everywhere! First on Jensen’s shoulders and then sliding down his arms until those ugly paws rested on Jensen’s hips. Goddammit! Jared saw red as Tom hitched up Jensen’s t-shirt, running his dirty fingers over that smooth skin as if they had any right to be there. The window was slightly open and Jared almost lost his balance when Jensen suddenly yelped and jerked away. “Tom…” he said, sounding exasperated as he removed Tom’s right hand from where it had been crawling down the front of his pants. “I thought we’d talked about this.” “Oh c’mon,” Tom groaned and nuzzled into his neck. “You know I love you, baby. Why won’t you give me this? Don’t you want me?” “Yeah, of course I do, it’s just…” Jensen sounded guilty which just pissed Jared off. Why the hell should he have to give Tom anything he didn’t want to? “I don’t know… My parents…” “Your parents won’t be home for at least an hour. You know that. C’mon, baby. I’ll make it so good.” “But…” “For Christ’s sake, you’re nineteen, Jensen. Don’t you think it’s about time you joined the grown-up world?” Tom scowled and pushed Jensen so he fell flat down on his back on the bed. “I’ll suck you off, make you all relaxed and shit and you won’t even feel it.” “No. Tom, stop. Let me go.” Jensen sounded more angry than scared but Jared wasn’t about to take that chance. This looked like a situation that could go very bad, really fast, and he wasn’t about to let that happen. Not on his watch. He turned around, promptly forgetting where he was, and the next thing he knew he was lying on the ground, trying to breath. Ow! Jesus fuck ow! His head hurt and his knees hurt and his shoulder really hurt where he’d hit the ground. After making sure he wasn’t broken anywhere he stumbled to his feet, brushed leaves and grass off his clothes and limped to the door. Taking a deep breath he pushed the bell button and waited. Nothing. He pushed it again, longer this time, practically hanging on until he finally heard someone come down the stairs. Trying to look as innocent as he could he had the smile ready when Jensen opened the door. “Jared?” He was looking rumbled, his lips swollen from kissing and his hair standing up in all directions. “What are you doing here?” “Uh…” Shit. He’d forgotten to make up a cover story. Desperate he said the first thing that came to mind. “My brother? Have you seen him? My mom sent me to look for him and I think he said something about visiting Cody. That’s your brother, right? Cody? They’re in the same class. Best buds. Who’d have guessed?” He laughed nervously. Jensen stared at him, as if trying to make sense of the flood of words. Then his lips twitched slightly. “Please don’t tell me your brother’s name is Ben.” Jared groaned inwardly. Death by relations, that’s what it would say on his tombstone. He wasn’t sure how but some day Ben’s stupid antics would be the death of Jared. “What did he do?” Jensen chuckled and shook his head. “Dude, I thought my little brother was bad but together those two are like Al-Qaeda in shorts.” “They blew up your toilet too?” Jared asked mortified. He was so gonna kill the little shit. “God, I’m so sorry. You weren’t on it right? Seriously, I couldn’t sit for a week!” Jensen’s eyes widened and then he burst out laughing, his whole face transforming from the strained polite look he’d been holding, into the mere picture of amusement. Jared grinned hesitantly. He wasn’t quite sure what he’d said that was so funny but whatever made Jensen laugh like that was worth any kind of humiliation. “Oh man, you’re not joking? They actually blew up your toilet with you on it?” “Well, they used lousy explosives which is the only reason either of them is alive today. The toilet survived but my ass? Woof, man! On the bright side I don’t think I’ll ever need a Brazilian wax!” He was vaguely aware that he was blabbering about stuff he had wowed he would kill Ben for if he ever mentioned it to anyone but frankly, with Jensen laughing like that, he didn’t really care what stupid secrets he spilled. “Stop it. Christ, you’re killing me!” Jensen wiped tears from his eyes and then leaned against the doorframe, grinning happily up at Jared. “But no, I’m not too sad to say I haven’t seen your brother. My parents and Cody are out anyway.” “Oh.” Jared tried to think of something else to keep Jensen from going back to grabby Tom. “So you’re home alone?” he asked innocently. “Well…” Before Jensen could answer he was pushed aside as the door was thrown wide open. “No, he’s not,” Tom growled. “What the hell are you doing here, kid?” “Chill, Tom. He’s looking for his brother,” Jensen explained, looking rather annoyed. “Well, your brother ain’t here, so beat it.” The door was slammed in Jared’s face before he had a chance to answer and he was left standing on the porch, blushing red with anger and embarrassment. Fucking asshole. He walked slowly down the driveway, casting a glance over his shoulder. The light in Jensen’s bedroom dimmed and then soft music started sounding from the window. Great. Could this get any worse? A drop of rain landing on his nose gave him the answer. He was soon soaked through and as he slipped back through the bushes and to the ladder, wet leaves and branches whipped his face. The ladder was already slippery from the rain and he lost his footing more than once but somehow managed to hang on. This time he was greeted with the sight of Jensen without his t-shirt, his skin glowing golden in the soft light of the bedside lamp. He was up against the door, hands hovering at Tom’s hips as if he wasn’t sure where they should be. Tom was kissing his neck, one hand in Jensen’s hair and the other… Jensen jumped and with a hitch Jared realized exactly where Tom’s other hand was. “Tom…” “It’s okay. C’mon, baby.” “I don’t know…” In Jared’s book not knowing if you wanted something pretty much equaled not wanting it. Fuck if he was going to let Tom convince Jensen otherwise. He made his way down a bit more carefully this time and then hurried to the door, his hand trembling as he pushed the button, and not just from standing outside in the cold rain. It took a bit longer this time but when Jensen finally opened he didn’t look annoyed. If anything he looked a bit relieved, if surprised. Although Jared had to admit that might be wishful thinking on his part. “Hey,” Jensen said, raising one eyebrow in query. Wow, he had really nice eyebrows. “Hey,” Jared echoed and tried to smile. “Uh… so I still haven’t found my brother and now I’ve lost my… my phone. And I was wondering if maybe I left it here?” “For fuck’s sake, you didn’t even come in!” Tom growled as he once again pushed Jensen aside and glowered at Jared. “How the hell could you have left it here?” Jared really didn’t like this guy and so decided to ignore him, focusing again on Jensen who was glaring angrily at Tom. “Can I use your phone? Just to check in at home, see if maybe he’s turned up on his own.” “Sure, come in,” Jensen said and smiled in a way that made Jared wonder if he knew Jared was lying his ass off. Tom sent Jensen an incredulous look but since it was Jensen’s home he couldn’t exactly argue. He did growl though and hovered over Jared as he used Jensen’s phone to call home. His mother sounded rather surprised when Jared asked about Ben, seeing as they were on even less speaking terms now than usual, but told him that his brother was right there and was Jared getting back anytime soon? Dinner would be ready in a few minutes. “Don’t wait, I’ll just heat it up when I get back.” “Alright, dear. Are you over at Chad’s? It’s raining cats and dogs outside and I don’t want you to catch a cold, honey. Maybe his mom can drive you home…” “Sure, mom. I’ll ask. Bye.” He hung up quickly and gave Jensen a grateful smile as he handed the phone back, totally ignoring Tom. “Thanks.” He wiped the mop of wet hair away from his face and coughed pitifully. “Man, it’s raining hard. You think I could get some coffee maybe? I think I’m catching a cold.” “No, you damn well can’t-!” “Sure, Jared,” Jensen cut in, giving Tom a glare. “Go find him a towel, will you? Can’t have him catching pneumonia.” “Would serve the little punk right,” muttered Tom as he stalked down the hall. Little? Jared thought that was a bit rich, seeing as Tom was at least an inch or so shorter than Jared. “Sorry about that,” Jensen said with a grimace as he busied himself with the coffee maker. “He’s grumpy for some reason.” “Doesn’t bother me,” Jared said cheerfully, trying his best to look the opposite of grumpy. “So, he’s your boyfriend?” he asked as innocently as he could. Jensen paused and then gave him a considering look. “I guess.” “You guess? Huh,” Jared repeated, totally casual. “Not sure?” “Not at the moment, no,” Jensen said softly and then quickly turned around when Tom stalked into the kitchen, throwing a towel at Jared. “Here. You smell like a wet dog.” He scrunched up his nose in disgust and Jared gave him a glare. He liked the way dogs smelled when they were wet, thank you very much. Jensen gave Tom a warning glance and then put a mug in front of Jared, smiling warmly. “The coffee will be ready in a minute,” he said. “You cold?” Jared shivered. “Kinda. It was raining pretty hard.” Jensen nodded and disappeared into the hall, bringing back a fleece sweater. “Here. Put this on.” Jared opened his mouth to say, ‘I still have your t-shirt,’ but thought better of it since he wasn’t sure if Tom knew about that and he didn’t want to get Jensen into more trouble. He didn’t trust that son-of-a-bitch further than he could throw him. “Thanks,” he said instead and pealed off his soaked-through jacket before slipping the warm sweater on over his wet t-shirt. “I can drive you home once you’ve finished your coffee,” Jensen offered and Jared’s eyes lit up. “That would be…” “I’ll spring him a taxi,” Tom said, smiling in a way that was probably supposed to be friendly but instead looked kinda menacing. “I can pay my own fair, thanks,” Jared said curtly and then smiled up at Jensen as he filled his mug. “Thank you. Mmm, smells nice. I’m very big on coffee,” he added at Jensen’s amused look. “Usually I’d say coffee would stall your growth but with you I don’t think we have to worry about that,” Jensen joked and poured into a mug of his own. “Tom, you want some?” “No.” Tom’s meager patience was obviously about to run out. “Jenny, c’mon, are we having a tea party now?” “If you’re bored you can leave,” Jared suggested and Tom shot him a glare before pushing himself off the counter. “I’m going upstairs. Jenny, you have ten minutes.” With that he stalked out of the kitchen and then they could hear him thumping up the stairs. “Do all your friends call you Jenny?” Jared asked, not really liking the way it sounded on his own tongue. In his fantasies he always called Jensen Jen. Usually followed by the words ‘god’ and ‘please, yes, right there!’ Those were nice fantasies. He looked up to find Jensen staring at him and he blushed, hoping he hadn’t said any of that out loud. “Er…Sorry? It’s probably none of my business.” “It’s okay. And no.” Jensen’s jaw tightened. “Chris is the only one who gets to call me that. Long story.” “Tom ain’t Chris,” Jared pointed out, forever Captain Obvious. Jensen looked down, his fingers tightening around the steaming mug in front of him, and Jared felt like a giant jerk. What the hell was he doing? “How’s your coffee?” Jensen suddenly asked and Jared gladly accepted the change of topic, going into a long rant about freshly ground coffee beans versus instant and how decaf was the source of all evil. He could see the tightness in Jensen’s shoulders slowly relenting and by the time he’d run out of all things coffee to talk about, Jensen was smiling, hand propped under his chin as he watched Jared talk. “You really are enthusiastic about coffee,” Jensen said when Jared stopped to drain the last drops of the now lukewarm liquid. “Totally. I worked as a barista last summer at my uncle’s coffee house. Well, helped out more since I wasn’t exactly old enough to be on the payroll but I learned a lot. And I got to drink all the vanilla mocha latte with sprinkles I could stomach.” “Which I imagine was plenty,” Jensen said with a grin. “Oh yeah. Only problem is coffee makes me talk like a mile a minute, like I’m on speed or something.” He waved his arms for emphasis and Jensen had to duck out of the way, laughing softly. “I noticed.” Jared blushed. Damn his big mouth. “Oops. Sorry.” “Don’t be. It’s cute.” Jared wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Puppies were cute. Small babies were cute, when they weren’t drooling or screaming their heads off. Guys weren’t supposed to be cute. Handsome, good looking, sexy, hot… those were all acceptable terms, but cute? That was kinda like being called pretty. Like a girl. Except Jensen actually was very pretty. Like really pretty. So pretty in fact Jared would call him beautiful. But not out loud though. He wasn’t sure Jensen would appreciate that. He glanced around and that’s when he noticed the clock on the wall. Oh shit, it was getting really late. And they’d definitely been talking longer than ten minutes. More like half an hour. He was loathed to leave Jensen alone with Tom but if his calculations were correct it wasn’t going to be a problem. “I should get going,” he said and nodded towards the window. “It’s stopped raining.” “I can still drive you home if you want,” Jensen offered but Jared noticed the way he glanced toward the stairs and figured he better not get Tom even madder at Jensen. “Nah, it’s alright,” he said and stood up. “It’s only about a ten minutes walk. I’ll be fine.” He took of the sweater and put his damp jacket back on with a grimace. “I still have your t-shirt at home. I can bring it tomorrow if you want?” “Keep it.” Jensen shrugged. “Looked better on you anyway.” Jared felt his face go deep red and he looked down, trying to hide the pleased smile. “I doubt that’s possible but uh, thanks.” He felt ridiculously shy all of a sudden and stared down at his toes before glancing at Jensen through his now very unruly bangs. “Listen, you think maybe we could…” There was a loud banging noise from upstairs and they both jumped. “I’ll talk to you later, ok?” Jensen asked hurriedly and gave him a quick smile. “Think I should maybe go talk to Mr. Grumpypants up there.” “Ok. Yeah.” He was getting cold again, the damp clothes tight and uncomfortable. They got to the front door and as he stepped outside he turned in the doorway, gathering up his nerves. “You know, Tom, he’s a bit of a jerk.” Jensen’s face went blank but then he sighed and looked away. “Jared…” “I’m sorry but he is. You could do a lot better.” Jensen looked up at him, eyes unreadable. “You think so?” “Definitely.” Jared flashed him a grin and then jumped down the steps. “See ya, Jensen. Thanks for the coffee. I had a great time,” he shouted as he jogged down the driveway with a backward wave. He thought he could hear Jensen mumble, “Me too,” as he closed the door and just the possibility was enough to make him smile. As soon as he got down to the road he slowed down until he was barely shuffling along, checking his watch. And right on time, there it came, the Ackles family car. He pretended to stop to tie his shoelaces as he waited for them to park and get out. “I bet they’re having sex,” he could hear Cody say, sounding more pleased than appalled. “Watch your tongue,” Jensen’s mom scolded but then added in a lower voice to her husband, “Maybe we should ring the doorbell?” “I’ll kill that goddamn Welling if he’s doing anything indecent in our house,” Jensen’s dad muttered and Jared couldn’t help smiling. He’d gladly offer to help bury the body in the backyard if needed. He could hear the doorbell chime inside the house just as he was straightening up and was just about to slip away when a loud roar of “What the fuck!” could be heard from upstairs. There was loud banging and then the door was thrown open and a very pissed off Tom, wearing only his underwear, screamed, “What the hell do you want now, you fucking shit!?!” right into Jensen’s father’s face. Jared’s only regret was that he hadn’t brought a camera. Because that, right there, was definitely the best Kodak moment he’d ever seen. This was officially the best Friday ever! The weekend went by way too slowly, especially considering Chad refused to hear him talk about Jensen for more than two hours straight, even if he did act out the whole Tom-meets-his-doom scenario for him with matching roars and everything which had Chad rolling around, almost peeing his pants laughing. His parents were blissfully away for most of the weekend, which left him alone once Chad had gone home, thinking about Jensen and trying to convince himself that maybe there was something there. Sunday morning Ben slipped into his room and since Jared was in an exceptionally good mood he for once didn’t yell at him to get out. Ben stood awkward for a while – which was a weird look on him since the kid was cockier than any twelve year old had a right to be – before throwing himself down on Jared’s bean bag chair with a sigh. “You still mad at me?” he asked quietly. Jared shrugged and put away the book he’d been reading. “Kinda, yeah. More disappointed, although I don’t know why. Not like I expected you to be nice about it.” Ben squirmed in the chair, looking ten kinds of uncomfortable. “Dude, c’mon. I swear I didn’t mean it like that. I was only trying to rile you up. Maybe blackmail some money out of you. I’d never have told them, okay?” “Whatever.” The kid was probably telling the truth but Jared wasn’t letting him off the hook that easily. “So what do you want?” Ben bit his lip. “Nothing,” he mumbled. “I just… You really hot on Jensen?” he suddenly asked. “I mean, he’s kinda girly.” Jared raised an eyebrow at him. “What’s it to you?” Ben shrugged. “Nothing.” He looked down again, chewing on his lip for a while. “He has a boyfriend, you know,” he finally blurted out. “Tom. Cody says he’s an asshole.” Jared snorted. “Cody’s not wrong.” “They had a fight though so I don’t know, maybe they’re over.” Ben glanced at him but Jared kept his face neutral even if his heart was bouncing. After a while Ben continued, “So me and Cody were talking and… Well, we’d rather you be his boyfriend. Not that we like either of you,” he hurried to add at Jared’s smirk, “Just that that way maybe you’d be too busy having sex to bother us.” “Ah. So what, you’re preparing a campaign?” Jared asked sarcastic. Ben snorted. “No. Just… wanted you to know we’re rooting for you. And if you ever need any dirt on Tom, just let us know.” “Doubt you’ll find anything,” Jared told him, since he’d already tried. It always paid to be prepared. “Apart from being an asshole the guy is practically a boy scout. In fact I think he was a boy scout,” he added with a frown. “But thanks for the offer. Now beat it, leave me alone.” “So you can ‘beat it’?” Ben asked with a leer, his cockiness back now he’d been forgiven. “Yes. I’m gonna watch gay porn on my laptop and jerk off.” “Ew! You’re so gross!” Ben screwed up his nose and scrambled out of the chair. “Buttfucker.” “I love you too, bro!” Jared yelled after him and then settled down on the bed, grinning. So Jensen and Tom had a fight? Hmm, interesting…   Monday morning he was late for school only arriving when everyone was already inside. When recess finally came he didn’t see Jensen anywhere although Tom was there, skulking with Mike Rosenbaum and sending Jared dirty looks that he returned with an innocent grin. “Man, he really hates you,” Chad noted with admiration. “That’s so cool.” “Until he gets me alone and beats me up,” Jared pointed out to him. “Nah. That guy? He’s all talk, man. I mean, if it was me he was mad at? Sure, he’d beat me up just like that. But you, you’re actually bigger than him. Guys like that want the odds in their favor.” “He’s got friends.” “Dude, he has Michael Rosenbaum. That’s like worse than no one. The other guys, they’re Jensen’s friends. They don’t even like Welling. If it came down to it, they’d definitely choose you.” “You think so?” Jared asked, unable to keep from grinning. “Yep.” Chad looked around. “So where’s your boy?” “Don’t know.” The smile slipped off Jared’s face. “Maybe he’s sick.” Just then he spotted Jensen walking swiftly across the school grounds, deep in conversation with Chris. He didn’t seem to notice Jared but on the other hand he was obviously ignoring Tom who called out to him and then flushed angrily when Jensen didn’t even look his way. “Guess Ben was right,” Chad said with a grin. “Looks like you’ve got a chance after all.” “Yeah, maybe.” Jared felt a flicker of hope although he wasn’t too sure. Just because Jensen broke up with his asshole of a boyfriend didn‘t mean he’d be interested in going out with a fifteen year old. Ok, so he was gonna be sixteen soon but not for another two months. He sighed as the school bell rang and followed Chad to their classroom. It was the seniors’ last week of school and then Jensen would be graduating shortly after and then what? Didn’t help that Jensen seemed to have forgotten all about them bonding over coffee, let alone the whole kissing thing. He wasn’t exactly ignoring Jared but he wasn’t bouncing over to chat either. Maybe gave him a nod, all cool like, as if he wasn’t too keen on being seen knowing a sophomore. It also didn’t help that Tom was giving him the evil eye and he kept catching Chris watching him with this odd look in his eyes that was actually a lot scarier than Tom’s glare even if Chris could pretty much fit into Tom’s pocket. And then there was Chad, who was getting really tired of him moping and refused to talk more about his ‘pathetic gay crush, man’ instead interrupting him with horrible porn talk whenever he tried to bring it up. If Jared had to listen to Chad’s description of pussy licking one more time he might actually gag. Especially considering he was pretty sure Chad had no idea what he was talking about. He was getting on his bike on Friday, iPod blasting in his ears, when someone suddenly tapped his shoulder, making him turn so fast he tripped over the bike and would have fallen on his face if the same someone hadn’t caught his arm and steadied him. Jared eyes went wide when he came face to face with Jensen who was looking at him with a mixture of amusement and trepidation, and saying… something. Jared pulled the earplugs out of his ears and gave Jensen an embarrassed smile. “Sorry, what was that?” Jensen sighed. “You know, you’ll go deaf if you play that stuff so loud.” “Is that right, grandma?” Jared snorted and then ducked when Jensen tried to smack the back of his head. “Cheeky bastard,” Jensen said but he was smiling and when Jared grinned back he shook his head in amusement. “So,” he started and looked down, rubbing his neck awkwardly, “I was thinking… You doing anything tonight?” Jared swallowed, all laughter gone. “No.” “You wanna… I don’t know… hang out?” Jared blinked. “Hang out?” “Yeah, you know…” Jensen being awkward was possibly the cutest thing in the whole world. “Play some PSP, whatever.” Jared hesitated. “Won’t your boyfriend mind?” he finally asked cautiously. Jensen raised his head and looked straight at him, face blank. “What boyfriend?” Jared raised an eyebrow but Jensen didn’t elaborate further and after a while Jared nodded. “Sure. I’d love to.” The transformation was instant. Jensen’s whole face lit up in the brightest smile and Jared’s heart did a few flip-flops when he realized Jensen had actually been worried he might say no. “Great! We could order pizza or something?” “Yeah… uh.” Jared bit his lip. “I don’t really have much money.” Jensen grinned and slapped his arm. “Dude, it’s on me. My house, my treat.” “Oh, ok.” He grinned back. “Sugar daddy.” He froze. What? Oh God. Stupid, stupid mouth. “Erm… I mean… What time?” Jensen looked like he couldn’t decide whether to laugh or be equally embarrassed. “Uh, six? Is that ok?” “Yeah. That... it’s great. I’ll see you then.” Jensen nodded and Jared swung back on his bike, somehow managing to smile and wave and ride his bike all at once without crashing. Because today he was Batman!   He didn’t feel like Batman though when he approached Jensen’s house some hours later. In fact he felt very much like peeing his pants and possibly throwing up while he was at it. It really didn’t help that he had no idea what he was doing here. Was this a date? Did ‘hang out’ equal date or did that only apply if they went somewhere? If it was a date should he have brought something? Or did that imply that Jensen was the girl? God, this was all so confusing! He’d tried to ask Chad for advice but after fifteen minutes of continuous laughing and calling Jared a big pussy, Jared hung up on him, deciding Chad didn’t know anything about gay dating anyway. Thing was, he didn’t know anyone who’d qualify as gay-dating counselor. Or was, you know, gay. Except for Jensen and Tom and well, apparently Mike but obviously they didn’t count. And then there was the clothes issue. What do you wear when ‘hanging out’ with your gay friend, who’d hopefully become more? Something that said “I’m not gonna jump you, unless you want me to,” or should he go more with “I’m up for anything you want to do, but if not, that’s cool too”? What was the dress code for this kind of thing? In the end he’d settled on the same nice jeans he’d worn at the party but a more casual t-shirt – meaning not as tight – and one of his pink striped shirts over it. He looked nice but not too nice. Casual without being sloppy. Just... right.   He paused for a moment, trying to get his heart to slow down to normal, before ringing the bell. He only had to wait a short time before the door was thrown open and he came face to face with… Jensen’s dad. Jared stepped back. Wow, scary. The man was handsome, you know if Jared had really had a thing for the whole sugar daddy scenario, with a graying beard and piercing eyes that were glaring suspiciously at Jared. “Who are you?” “Uhm… Jared?” Jared said cautiously and wondered if he’d gotten the whole thing wrong. Maybe Jensen had meant tomorrow night. Or maybe he’d just been fucking with him, setting Jared up for a big joke. “Jensen’s friend?” he added when he realized Jensen’s dad was still glaring at him, obviously waiting for some further explanation. “I don’t remember seeing you before. What did you say your name was again?” “Jared. Jared Padalecki. Look…” “Jeff, will you let him in and stop being such an ass?” Jensen said and pushed his dad playfully out of the way. “Jared, hey. Sorry about that. He’s just taking the role of Papa Bear a little too seriously.” Jensen shot the grizzly bear in question a hard look and the menacing glare was instantly replaced by crinkling eyes. “Well, seeing as last time you brought home the village idiot…” Jared bit his lip to keep from giggling but Jensen only rolled his eyes and grabbed Jared’s arm, pulling him inside. “Come on, we’ll go to my room until they leave. You are leaving soon, right?” he asked and shot his dad another glare. “Yeah, yeah. As soon as your mother is ready.” “And you’re taking Cody?” Jeff rolled his eyes. “Yes, even if I don’t understand why you two can never get along.” At Jensen’s look Jeff relented and closed the front door with a sigh before giving Jared a nod. “This one’s gonna keep his pants on, right? Because he barely looks old enough to shave.” “Jeff!” Jensen tightened his hold on Jared’s arm and pulled him along up the stairs. “I’m so sorry. He thinks he’s funny BUT HE’S NOT!” he said, shouting the last words, which had Jeff shooting back, “I’m HILARIOUS!” “I think he’s cool,” Jared said, grinning. “Way cooler than my dad. Why do you call him Jeff?” Jensen shrugged as he pushed open the door to his room. “He’s my stepdad.” He seemed to hesitate for a moment but then added cautiously, “Mom met him after my real dad kicked us out three years ago.” Jared blinked. “Oh. Why?” he asked and then once again cursed his big mouth when Jensen stiffened and he realized how rude he was being. “I mean… You don’t have to tell me. Sorry.” Jensen looked down, biting his lip. “It’s okay. It was… The whole gay thing. He didn’t take it well. Mom sided with me.” He shrugged again, as if it was no big deal but Jared could hear the gratitude toward her evident in his voice. “It was… bad. We were on the run for a year until they finally arrested him. Jeff was mom’s lawyer.” “Oh wow.” Jared really wasn’t sure what to say. He was surprised Jensen was telling him all this and from the look on Jensen’s face so was he. As if it had just slipped out unintentionally and now he was looking ten kinds of uncomfortable and like he was expecting Jared to run screaming. “I haven’t told mine yet,” Jared finally confessed, deliberately easing them away from the subject of Jensen’s past. “It’s not that I think they’ll throw me out or anything, I just…” He fiddled awkwardly with the cuff of his shirt. “I don’t know.” “Yeah.” They stood in silence for a while and Jared was wondering if he’d killed the mood, before they’d even gotten into one, with all his stupid questions when Jensen suddenly looked up and smiled softly. “You’ll do it when you’re ready. Don’t worry about it.” Jared smiled back and just like that the air in the room seemed lighter. “So what you wanna do until they leave?” For a moment Jared contemplated suggesting trying that whole kissing thing again. Something must have given his thoughts away though because Jensen looked away, blushing slightly. “We could play some PSP?” “You have two?” “I’m holding Cody’s ransom until he gives me my iPod back,” Jensen explained with a grin and Jared laughed. “I think our brothers might possibly be twins, separated at birth,” he said and caught the PSP Jensen threw at him. “Now prepare to be slaughtered!” he hollered and threw himself down on the bed. “Bring it on, big guy.” Jensen settled down beside him with a grin. He was warm and smelled so good and… Jared groaned as he was killed before the game had really started. The next hour went by quickly and they were so engrossed in their games they hardly looked up when Jeff popped his head inside, telling them they were off and to ‘please behave and keep their clothes on’. Jared shot Jensen an amused look. “You get naked guys in here often?” Jensen frowned until he realized Jared was joking and elbowed him hard to pay for his insolence. “Shut up. And no. Jeff’s just…” He chuckled. “Let’s just say Tom’s last minutes as a guest in this house weren’t very dignified.” Jared grinned. “I kinda heard the roars. Man, I had no idea Tom was a tighty- whitey guy.” Jensen looked at him, startled. “Dude! Were you watching?” “Maybe.” For a moment Jared was sure Jensen was going to be mad as hell but then he suddenly doubled over, and the room filled with laughter. “God!” He glanced up, tears in his eyes as he tried to get his breath back. “You know, I almost felt sorry for him and I probably would have if he hadn’t been such a complete jerk to you,” he said, still shaking with laughter. “Or, you know, just a complete jerk, period,” Jared pointed out and Jensen blushed. “Yeah, that too.” “Seriously, man, what did you see in him?” Jensen shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s handsome enough. Not that that’s all I think about,” he hurried to add when Jared shot him a frown. “It’s just… There aren’t that many gay guys around, ya know. You gotta start somewhere.” “I guess.” Jared wrinkled his nose in thought. “I never thought of it that way. But then again it hasn’t been that long. Since I figured it out myself, I mean. And by then there already was-.” He cut himself off abruptly. Jensen was watching him, waiting for him to continue and he had no idea what to say. “Well, you,” he finished lamely and his face became as red as a tomato. Damn. Jensen blinked. “You had a crush on me?” “Uh… think you have your tenses mixed up there, buddy” Jared mumbled, suddenly very interested in the hole in his jeans, poking his finger through it and scratching his knee. “Huh.” Jensen seemed genuinely surprised. “How long?” “Pretty much since the day you transferred here,” Jared said and wondered what the hell he was doing. Jensen stilled. “That’s almost two years ago.” “Yup.” “You were fourteen years old.” “That’s… Yes.” Jensen sat still for a while and then turned on the bed, watching him intently. “Jared, when did you figure out you were gay?” He blushed. “Erm… The first time I saw you?” Jensen sat back, seeming dazed. “Christ. You… You’re not joking?” Jared frowned, feeling put upon. “No.” “So, what? I pretty much turned you gay?” “Now you sound like Chad,” Jared sighed. “Dude, you know it better than anyone that you can’t turn anyone gay. They either are or they aren’t. I just didn’t realize until then.” “Christ,” Jensen repeated. “Why didn’t you say something?” Jared gave him an incredulous look. “Dude, I was fourteen. I had pimples everywhere. My voice was all squeaky! You would have laughed your head off.” “I wouldn’t have laughed!” Jensen said indignantly and Jared raised an eyebrow. “Ok, maybe a little,” he confessed. “But… man! Two years?” “Twenty months, two weeks and three days but who’s counting?” Jared joked although he was still flushed red and really wanted the floor to swallow him. Jensen just kept watching him and Jared was starting to feel increasingly uncomfortable under the scrutiny. “You gonna freak out?” he finally asked, voice low. Jensen licked his lips nervously but then he swallowed and shook his head. “No. I just… I had no idea.” “Yeah, I know,” Jared said sarcastically. “Two weeks ago you didn’t even know my name.” Jensen laughed nervously. “Yeah, about that… I knew.” Jared frowned. “Knew what?” “Your name. And… I kinda had noticed you. A lot.” He threw Jared a glance, his smile shy. “You’re quite the looker, Jared. And the last year you’ve really… grown. And I don’t just mean emotionally,” he added, blushing deeply. Jared stared at him in surprise. “You been checking me out?” he asked incredulous. Wow, red-faced Jensen really was the cutest thing in the world. “Maybe.” “You never said anything. Did anything. At all,” Jared pointed out to him, not sure whether he should be flattered that Jensen had actually noticed him or annoyed that he’d been letting him pine on his own for so long. Jensen sighed. “Dude, you’re three years younger than me. I don’t want to use the hated ‘you’re just a kid’ line but damn it, Jare, you are.” Jared stiffened. “You kissed me, remember?” “And I shouldn’t have. I mean,” Jensen hurried to add at Jared’s crestfallen face, “Not then. I should have waited until after…” He hesitated. “You’re gonna think I’m a total jerk.” “I’m kinda thinking that right now,” Jared pouted. “So please, don’t stop on my account.” Jensen sighed and rubbed one hand over his face. “I had noticed you and I wanted to find out if you’d be interested but I didn’t want to do anything until you were at least sixteen, man. That’s the truth, ok? And I’m sorry if that makes you mad at me but I just… I didn’t want to be that guy. The sleazy guy who perves over the teeny twinks. I’ve met that guy, I’ve fucking dated that guy and it’s not the ideal way to start out. So… no.” Jared sat still, staring down at his hands still holding the PSP in his lap. “So what changed?” he finally asked. “Why did you…?” Jensen was silent for a while and when Jared looked over he was met with the sight of an adorably embarrassed Jensen, pink faced and nibbling at his lower lip. “Well, there was beer,” he finally admitted. “And weed. And you taking your shirt off and almost giving me a heart attack with those abs and that perfect skin.” He laughed shyly. “I almost undid your pants and jerked you off, right there. Was so close to just dropping to my knees and…” He took a deep breath, then let it out slowly, and when he looked up his pupils were blown wide open, burning like fire. Jared stared back at him, his heart hammering in his chest, his dick suddenly so hard in his jeans it hurt. “It’s illegal how goddamn hot you are, Jared. Literally illegal.” “I don’t care,” Jared breathed, voice hoarse. “I’m gonna be sixteen in two months.” “Still illegal,” Jensen whispered. “But better. God, I’ve been counting the days. I wanted… I want you to be sure. To know what you’re getting yourself into.” Jared shook his head. “I do know. I can’t wait two months. I can’t wait another minute. I’m not a kid, Jen. I’m not… I’m old enough.” He gazed pleadingly at Jensen. “Now. I’m old enough now.” Jensen groaned. “Please, Jared, don’t…” “It doesn’t matter. Two months, what the hell does it matter?” he whispered, voice getting desperate. God, he wanted Jensen. So much. He thought he might cry if Jensen turned him down. “I don’t want… I won’t be that guy. I won’t...” “You’re not. You think you would even be talking about this if you were? You’re just you. You’re…” Jared’s voice broke. “God, Jen, if you don’t kiss me right now I’ll die. I mean it.” “Jared…” “Kiss me, Jen. Can you just kiss me, goddamn it!” Jensen held his frantic gaze and then suddenly he lunged forward, grabbed Jared by the neck and yanked him across the bed, crushing their lips together. Jared lost his balance and fell back on the bed where he found himself pressed into the soft pillows, mouth opening on a gasp as Jensen angled his head and then pushed his tongue into Jared’s mouth, hot and wet and Oh. My. God. Jensen’s elbows were on each side of Jared’s head, fingers tangled in his hair, and when Jared grabbed hold of Jensen’s shoulder he moaned and moved even closer, their hips bumping and the thin materials of their t-shirts bundled up so Jared could feel the soft skin of Jensen’s stomach brush his own. Frantic his hands moved, sliding down Jensen’s back and then over the curves of his ass until they was cupping it, pushing and pulling to try and get Jensen to move on top of him, his hips jerking when Jensen’s hipbone pressed against his desperate dick. “God, oh God, “ Jensen gasped into Jared’s mouth, fingers tightening in his hair. “Don’t stop,” he panted and jerked when Jensen sucked on his lower lip. “Oh Jesus, don’t you fucking stop.” “I’m gonna come in my pants!” Jensen whimpered. “Do it!” Jared pushed one thigh in between Jensen’s legs and he rubbed eagerly against it. “Fuck yeah, like that. Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Jensen shifted higher up and suddenly he was in the exact right spot with Jared’s cock nested in the crook of his hips and his own dick pushing against Jared’s thigh. They gasped, Jared’s eyes widening. He tightened his hold on Jensen’s hips, pressing them even closer as he stared into Jensen’s startled eyes. They were impossibly green, pupils blown wide and dark, and Jared didn’t think he’d ever seen anything more beautiful. Jensen hips gave an involuntarily jerk and Jared went with it, holding on to Jensen’s hips and rocking him back and forth, increasingly faster and harder. It was so damn fucking good, better than anything he’d ever imagined and when Jensen sort of growled and started kissing him again, desperately licking and biting at his mouth as if he was starving for it, that was it. Jared stiffened and everything seemed to slow down around him. Through the white noise buzzing in his ears he could hear Jensen gasping his name and then suddenly they were both coming, Jared’s fingers digging into Jensen’s ass as Jensen bit down on his lip and together they jerked and shuddered like the world was about to end. With a groan Jensen collapsed on top of him, still shaking and breathing harshly, and when Jared pressed a kiss to the side of Jensen’s neck he could feel Jensen’s heartbeat throb frantically against his lips. “That was…wow,” he finally said when Jensen made no attempt to move. “Oh God,” Jensen groaned and shuddered so violently he would have fallen off if Jared’s hadn’t wrapped his arms around him, holding him close. “Are you freaking out now?” he laughed. “Thinking about it,” Jensen mumbled into his neck but then he turned his head and found Jared’s lips. The kiss was at an awkward angle and wet with spit and kept getting cut off by Jensen hitched breathing, but Jared was pretty sure it was the kiss to conquer all kisses. After a while Jensen laid down his head on Jared’s shoulder and just gazed at him, looking like he couldn’t quite believe what had happened. “We were gonna have pizza,” he whispered finally and Jared grinned. “Still can,” he started saying but Jensen laid a finger on his lips, shushing him. “And watch a movie,” he continued, “and maybe talk. Get to know each other better.” Jared sucked Jensen’s finger into his mouth and bit it lightly, smiling when it got him a moan and a quick jerk of Jensen’s hips. “And then what?” he asked huskily after letting the finger go with a wet pop. “I was gonna kiss you goodnight,” Jensen told him quietly. “If you’d let me.” Jared smiled. “I would have let you.” “No kidding,” Jensen breathed and Jared laughed. They gazed at each other for a while until Jared’s stomach suddenly rumbled. Jensen grinned. “You hungry?” “Starving,” Jared confessed and then grimaced when Jensen started to slide off him. “Yeurgh, my boxers are all wet and sticky.” Jensen stood up and made a face as he looked down at his own crotch, which had a dark patch, slowly spreading. “At least you’re wearing some.” He threw Jared a grin. “Don’t worry, I’ll lend you a pair.” Jared stared up at him, wide-eyed. “You’re not wearing any? Are you telling me all I had to do was pop that button and…” “If you had this would have been over even faster,” Jensen said and rummaged through his drawers. “Here you go,” he said and tossed over a piece of clothing. Jared looked down at the black boxer briefs in his hand. For some reason the idea of wearing Jensen’s underwear was having a very encouraging effect on him and he tried to remind his dick it had just had some and should really try to pace itself. It didn’t listen. “I’ll have half of your wardrobe soon if you keep this up,” he noted and looked up to find Jensen with his back turned, naked from the waist down. “Oh God!” “I’m gonna clean up,” Jensen was saying with distaste in his voice. “I hate dry come in my pubes.” “Oh. My. God.” “What?” Jensen turned around and Jared’s eyes widened even further. “You okay?” “You’re… naked,” Jared said dazedly. “Uh, yes.” Jensen had the decency to blush but only a little. “My jeans were sticky.” “I can see your cock.” Jensen looked down at himself and then up again, frowning. “Dude, don’t you shower at gym? Don’t tell me this is the first cock you’ve seen.” “No, but...” Jared swallowed. “This is your cock.” Jensen snorted but he looked pleased. “When you put it like that.” He sauntered into the adjoined bathroom with an exaggerated swag of his hips, emerging five minutes later wearing clean boxers and smelling faintly of soap. As he grabbed a clean pair of jeans and pulled them on he looked over at Jared who was still sitting on the bed, slightly dazed. “So, now you’ve seen mine, you gonna show me yours?” Jared jerked awake and frantically pulled the boxers over his crotch. “What are we? Twelve?” he asked, flustered. “Dude, I’m joking. Relax.” Jensen gave him an odd look but then his face softened and he smiled sympathetically. “You know, sometimes guys don’t develop all at once. You could still have some growing left to do… there. Don’t worry about it.” What? Jared blinked and then suddenly he got it. “You think I’m… Dude, I don’t have size issues! Why should I have size issues?” His eyes widened. “I should have size issues?” Jensen raised his hands defensively, face all innocent. “Hey, it’s okay. I mean, from what I could tell, you seemed quite alright.” “You…” Jared hid behind his hands, mortified. “Oh God, you think I have a small dick!” There was a weird choking sound and when he looked up, face flushed red, he caught Jensen with one hand covering his mouth, desperately trying to smother the laughter bubbling in his throat. “Are you laughing at me?” Jared asked, feeling incredibly hurt. “You know, it’s not my fault if I’m…” “Jared, c’mon! You can’t be serious?” Jensen laughed. “Dude, we were wearing all our clothes and I could still tell you’re hung like a goddamn stallion.” Jared stilled. “I am?” he asked cautiously. “Oh yeah,” Jensen said, smiling. “Believe me, if anyone should worry, it’s me.” When Jared just blinked confused up at him he blurted out, “After all, it’s my virgin ass on the line.” He blushed deeply, which Jared would have found unbelievably cute if he’d had any working brain cells. As it was he just stared, mouth open, until Jensen squeaked, “Pizza? Sound good?” and awkwardly fled the room. “Yeah,” Jared said dazedly, approximately five minutes later. “That would… that would be great.” He stood up, clutching Jensen’s underwear in his fist. “I’m gonna clean up,” he informed the empty room and stumbled into the bathroom, his dick so hard he could hardly walk. Virgin ass. Jensen had a virgin ass. Jensen wanted Jared to deflower his virgin ass. Oh God. Thankfully he hadn’t had time to change because he really didn’t want to explain to Jensen why he needed another pair of underwear.   The rest of the night was spent eating pizza and watching John McClane blow shit up and the two of them being anything but intimate. Jared wasn’t quite sure where Jensen was going with all this. He kept his distance, dodging any movements Jared made his way and laughing away Jared’s rather lame attempts at being suggestive. In the end Jared gave up and just focused on having fun and enjoy being in Jensen’s company, sans kissing. It surprised him how well they fit, him and Jensen, despite their three-year difference. Whether that meant he was mature or that Jensen was childish, he wasn’t sure. Probably neither. Funny thing was, they had very different taste in almost everything. Jared loved dogs beyond anything while Jensen really liked horses, having been brought up on a ranch most of his life. That put quite a damper on Jared’s fantasy about the puppy farm but he guessed they could have a few horses as well. He was open to suggestions. Jensen liked more country and rock while Jared enjoyed techno and less known indie groups that Jensen mockingly called emo music. They supported opposite sports teams, each of them wowing that they’d beat the other in the finals. Jensen liked action movies well enough but was more into artistic and European films and grimaced when Jared started gushing about his collection of horror movies. “Devour? You’re kidding, right? “Dude, it’s supposed to be bad! That’s the fun of it.” “Oookaaay.” Jensen gave him a look that clearly said ‘weirdo’ and Jared reached over to smack Jensen on the arm, grinning. Jensen slapped him back and suddenly they were tussling on the couch, laughing and yelling as Bruce Willis blew up a plane on the TV screen. Jared finally managed to use the added height and weight to his advantage and pinned Jensen underneath him, panting. He shifted to get a better hold and Jensen’s laughter abruptly cut off as he stared up at Jared, licking his lips, their hips pressed together. Just then the door opened and the whole Ackles clan – or Morgan-Ackles clan more accurately considering the whole stepdad issue – tumbled into the hall. The boys froze, and then Jared rolled off, landing on the floor with a loud thump before quickly getting to his feet, just managing to throw himself down on the other side of the couch before Jeff poked his head in, grinning wickedly. “You boys decent?” Jensen gave him a glare while Jared tried to look innocent. Which was quite the challenge considering he was hard as a rock and his gaze kept slipping to the small sliver of skin showing between Jensen’s jeans and t-shirt. He also suspected he looked just as flushed as Jensen, if not even more since his face felt embarrassingly hot, and he had to sit on his hands to keep from reaching out and smoothing down Jensen’s wild hair. All in all he didn’t think they made a very convincing picture of innocence. Jeff didn’t seem to think so either as he chuckled merrily and then grabbed Cody by the neck as he tried to squeeze into the living room, telling him it was time for bed and ‘No argument, boy’. “I should probably get going,” Jared said reluctantly and swore when he checked his watch. His mom was gonna kill him. “Want me to drive you?” Jensen offered as they both stood up, awkwardly straightening their clothes. “It’s okay. It’s only ten minutes.” “I remember,” Jensen said with a smile and Jared ducked his head, feeling stupidly pleased. Jensen walked him to the door and for a moment they stood close, neither knowing how to end the evening. Finally Jensen asked, “Wanna meet up tomorrow?” and Jared sighed in relief. “Sure, okay.” He tried to sound casual but the big grin gave him away. “Great.” Jensen lit up with a smile. “If you come by around noon my mom will have her famous Saturday pancakes ready.” “Sounds good.” Jared glanced down the hall and then pulled Jensen in for a quick kiss, barely tasting his lips before letting him go and stepping back, flushed and embarrassed. “I’ll see you then,” he said without daring to look up and then ran out the door and down the driveway. At the last moment he glanced back and found Jensen staring after him, fingers lightly touching his lips. Jared smiled all the way home.   Compared to last weekend this one went by incredibly quickly. No moping or sulking while bitching to Chad on the phone but instead he was laughing with Jensen while they played Nintendo or watched movies and just had a great time. Jared couldn’t ever remember clicking so fast with anyone, not even Chad who he’d known since he was five. But then again their friendship had started by Chad beating him over the head with a shovel when Jared tried to steal his favourite car in kindergarten and Jared then forcing Chad to eat dirt. And then they had hated each other for weeks and probably would have done forever if a six year old called Dino hadn’t thrown rocks at both of them and forced them to join forces to tackle him down and pour sand down his pants. They’d been inseparable since. Which made Jared feel kinda guilty for not answering Chad’s calls or text messages the whole weekend. Each day he wowed to call Chad as soon as he came home and each night he forgot, busy jerking off with the memory of Jensen playing in his head. Monday morning he did catch up with Chad though on his way to school, jogging to keep up with his friend’s bike. “Hey,” he said and tried to sound casual although he could see Chad was pissed off. “Hey,” Chad grunted back and Jared breathed out. At least they were talking. “I’m sorry about not calling you, man. I’ve just been… busy.” “I noticed,” Chad grumbled but he didn’t seem quite as angry. “So how’s your little boyfriend?” “He’s not my boyfriend. I think,” Jared said and frowned. “You think?” Chad glanced at him. “What, you don’t know?” “We haven’t really talked about it,” Jared confessed. “I mean, we’ve just been hanging out. Getting to know each other, I guess.” “Have you gotten to know each other’s dicks?” Chad asked sarcastically. “’Cos that would be a big clue.” Jared felt his face grow hot. “Uh…” Chad stopped and stared at him. “You’re joking, right? Oh man, how easy are you?” “Me? Why me? Maybe he’s the easy one!” Chad rolled his eyes. “Dude, he’s the older one, you’re the boytoy. Which means if you give in, you’re the slut.” Jared frowned. “Well, that’s just stupid. Beside it wasn’t like that.” “Do I really want to hear this?” Chad asked and seemed to be contemplating whether he could steer his bike and plug his fingers in his ears at the same time. “We just started kissing and… came in our pants,” Jared told him, feeling both hot and embarrassed at the memory. “Ok, thank you, and will you please never talk to me about your sex life again?” Chad groaned. “But I think we’ve established he is your boyfriend.” Jared’s smile dropped. “Yeah, except he hasn’t even kissed me since. So I don’t know. Every time I try something he turns away or pretends he doesn’t notice. What’s that about?” “Huh.” Chad looked thoughtful. “Maybe he’s feeling guilty for wanting to fuck a fifteen year old.” “I’m sixteen in two months, man! And it’s not like I’m a little kid who can’t take care of myself if I didn’t want something. I’m bigger than he is.” Chad raised an eyebrow. “Everywhere?” “Dude! Shut up.” Jared punched Chad’s arm and then quickly reached out to grab him before he fell off his bike. “I thought you didn’t want to hear more about my sex life.” “I don’t. I’m just curious if he can measure up to your monster trouser snake.” Jared grinned at him and he frowned. “What?” “You’re so gay.” “Am not!” “Are too,” Jared sing sang. “You’ve been checking me out, man. Oh, I feel so violated!” “Shut up!” “Are you looking at my ass? You’re looking at my ass right now! Chad, Chad, stop looking at my ass!” “I’m gonna kick your ass so hard you won’t be sitting down for weeks, you gay freak!” Chad growled and lunged out to punch him. Jared laughed and took off down the road, Chad tramping the pedals hard to catch up with him. By the time they reached school they were both sweaty and flushed, with Chad cursing up a streak and Jared breathless from laughing so much. As he waited for Chad to lock up his bike, Jared let his eyes sweep across the school ground, stopping dead on Jensen who was as usual sitting with his buds on the bench under the tree in the middle of the lot. His stomach tightened and he suddenly felt unsure and awkward. All last week Jensen had ignored him while they were at school. And when he’d finally approached him on Friday the lot had been empty with everyone already gone home. So even if the weekend had been great he had no idea where they stood when it came to school. Not that it would matter much longer, seeing as the seniors only had two days left before walking out for the last time. But today, right now, Jared had no idea how to act. “Dude, what?” Chad followed his gaze and groaned. “You gonna ditch me again to go sit with your boyfriend?” “Shut up.” Jared bit his lip. “What if he doesn’t want anyone to know?” He fiddled with the sleeves of his shirt, pulling them nervously down as if he could hide himself by hiding his skin. “Maybe I should just wait until he’s gone inside?” Chad stared at him incredulous. “Man, are you listening to yourself? Fucking Christ. Jare, if he snubs you, he’s not worth it. You wanna be someone’s dirty little secret? Really?” “No, but…” “I’m not saying he has to molest you in public, because seriously, no one wants to see that, but if he pretends not to know you again, he’s a fucking dickhead and you’re better off without him.” “I don’t know…” “What’s wrong with you? He’s turned you into a complete pussy, man. Stand up for yourself. Be your own man. Or woman. Whatever.” “You’re a woman,” Jared bit back but he did feel a little bit better. Chad was right. If Jensen wanted to go back to ignoring him every time his friends were around he wasn’t the guy Jared thought him to be. “Ok, let’s go.” Chad shook his head. “Nuhuh, I’m not going with you, man. I’ll see you inside.” “Now who’s the pussy?” Jared hissed after him but Chad just flipped him one finger and jogged across the lot to where Sandy and Sophia were standing, laughing and glancing their way. Jared gave Chad’s retreating back a last glare before focusing back on the task at hand. Jensen didn’t seem to have noticed him yet. He had his back half-turned and was deep in conversation with Chris. Steve was lounging on the bench, squinting against the sun and it was actually him who first looked up to spot Jared approaching slowly and, what he hoped looked calmly instead of hesitantly. Steve nudged Chris who turned back with a frown and then looked up, fixing his eyes on Jared. A slow grin spread across his face but his eyes were unreadable and it made him look even more menacing if possible Jared could feel his face grow hot and he had to physically force his legs to continue walking forward instead of running the other way. This was such a bad idea. Such a terrible, terrible idea. He was gonna kill Chad if he made it out of this without dying of embarrassment or simply combusting on the spot, that’s how hot he was feeling. Jensen seemed to finally notice that his friends’ attentions were directed elsewhere and followed their gaze, only to stop short and blush deeply when he saw Jared. Jared took the last three steps until he was standing only two feet away, forcing all of them to tilt their head back in order to look him in the eye. “Hey,” he said and congratulated himself on the near steadiness of his voice. Now if he could just keep his hands from trembling. Jensen licked his lips nervously but then he broke into a stiff smile and he stood up, slapping Jared amicably on the arm. “Hey, Jared. Guys, you remember Jared, right?” “Hard not to, considering you’ve been talking about him non-stop for the last half-hour,” Chris grumbled and Jensen’s face flamed up. Steve slapped Chris over the head but he was grinning as well and when Jensen shot them both a glare he just shrugged and said, “Well, it’s true.” “I hate you both,” Jensen muttered but when he glanced at Jared he looked more embarrassed than mad. “I might have mentioned you once or twice.” Jared grinned. Jensen had been talking about him? That was good, right? “So, Jared,” Chris said casually. “Fifteen, huh? Had many boyfriends?” Jared frowned. “No. You?” Steve burst out laughing and Jensen shook his head in amusement over Chris’s outraged look. “Dude, you so deserved that.” “I’m just looking out for the boy’s welfare! Wouldn’t want him taken advantage of by our darling Jenny.” Chris leaned forward, whispering conspiratorially, “Because let me tell you, boy, he sure likes your sweet ass.” “Chris!” This time Jensen slapped him over the head, looking furious. “What the hell is wrong with you?” “It’s okay,” Jared said, even if his face was burning. “It’s a nice ass. Maybe if you had such a sweet ass yourself you’d be getting some and wouldn’t be such a pissy prick.” Chris stared at him and for a moment Jared wondered if he should take off right now. Chris was one scary son-of-a-bitch but with those short legs he’d never catch him running. Just as he was planning his route to escape Chris suddenly doubled over, laughing and slapping his knee. “I like you, man. You…! Damn! Keep this one, Jenny. He’s worth it for the entertainment alone.” “And he’s not too bad to look at either,” Steve added. “Tall and pretty. Just your type.” Jensen glared at both of them and then grabbed Jared’s arm, pulling him away. “Ignore them. They’re fucking jerks.” “So I’m not your type?” Jared asked. Jensen had a type? How many boyfriends had he had? “I don’t have a type,” Jensen answered annoyed, as if he could read Jared’s thoughts. “They’re just being jerks because Tom was tall. Two don’t make a type.” “I guess not.” Jared glanced at him. “So what did you tell them? About us I mean.” Jensen blushed. “Just that we hung out this weekend. Nothing… explicit.” “Okay.” He wasn’t sure how to approach this. “I didn’t know if you wanted me to come over or not.” “Why?” Jensen seemed genuinely puzzled. “You know. Because you spent the last two weeks ignoring me.” Jensen frowned. “I wasn’t ignoring you.” “Yeah, you kinda were.” Jensen stopped and looked at him. He seemed actually surprised. “I didn’t mean to. I just… I didn’t think it was worth pissing Tom off even further. He was kinda mad at you. Accused you of lying about looking for your brother. Said you were stalking me.” “He did?” Jared tried to look shocked. “Wow, talk about paranoia.” “I know. So I was trying to keep his attention away from you. At least for a little while. I didn’t think you’d notice.” Jared rolled his eyes. “Are you kidding me? I don’t know about you but in my world when you get your first kiss and then the one who kissed you acts as if he doesn’t even know who you are, that kinda sucks.” Jensen blinked up at him. “First kiss?” Crap. “I didn’t say that.” Jensen’s lips twitched. “Yes, you did.” “I meant gay kiss. Kissed by a guy.” “Nuhuh. I don’t think so.” “I… You… Fine!” Jared stomped ahead, ignoring Jensen’s laughter. “Shut up!” Jensen followed him, elbowing him playfully. “You’re like the cutest thing in the whole world when you’re pissed off.” “I’m not cute,” Jared protested. “Stop saying I’m cute.” “Cute, cute, cute,” Jensen chanted. “Cute as a button. Cute like a puppy. Cute as-.” Jared swung around and grabbed Jensen by the shoulders, pushing him up against the lockers before leaning in and breathing hard against his neck. “You know what’s cute? The hard-on you’re gonna have for the rest of the day, thinking about this.” And then he shoved his hand down Jensen’s pants, grabbed his dick and gave it few tugs before abruptly letting go. “Now that, that’s cute.” Jensen stared up at him with wide eyes and suddenly it hit Jared that they were pretty much mirroring what he’d seen through Jensen’s window that rainy night, except this time he was the culprit, not Tom. He stumbled back, the grin falling from his face. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have...” He turned around and fled, the sound of Jensen’s hitched breathing following him all the way down the hall. A few people gave him a curious glance, but no one seemed to have seen exactly what had gone down and they soon turned back to whatever they’d been doing. The day wound on forever and Jared was starting to think it would never end. He felt guilty whenever he thought of the shocked look on Jensen’s face but the memory of Jensen’s taut body, pressed up against his… Jared squirmed in his chair. Thank God for long shirts. “Cut it out,” Chad hissed at him in third period. “Your horniness is distracting me.” “From calculus?” Jared snorted. “And this troubles you why?” “I don’t want to think about you horny. Or what you’re gonna do about it once we get out of here.” Chad sighed. “Seriously, I need to get myself a new best friend. Someone I can talk pussy to.” The two girls sitting in front of them turned around, shooting them both vicious glares. Jared gave them an embarrassed smile and elbowed Chad hard. “You’re so gross. Besides, I have to listen to you talk about your imaginary sex life all the time.” “It’s not imaginary!” “Uhuh, it so is.” “Shut up!” “Virgin!” “Quiet back there!” They fell silent and spent the rest of the class mouthing insults at each other which consisted of different variation of ‘cockslut’ and ‘pussylicker’, most of which Jared was pretty sure didn’t exist in any kind of dictionary. When school ended Jared found himself torn between feeling like he should walk home with Chad and wanting to find Jensen to see if he was alright, if he’d even want to talk to him ever again. “Dude, go on. Go molest your boyfriend.” Molest. Yeah, apparently he was good at that. “Is he my boyfriend?” Jared asked miserable. “At least try and find that out!” Chad said exasperated and swung on his bike. “I’ll talk to you later. And if you ignore my calls again I’ll castrate you.” “Always knew you wanted my dick,” Jared quipped and Chad rolled his eyes before waving him goodbye. With one finger. Jared chuckled and then looked around, trying to find Jensen. Only to come face to face with Tom, looking for all the world like he wanted to castrate Jared too. “You really think you’re something, don’t you?” Tom sneered. “Stay the hell away from him!” “Who, Chad?” Jared asked innocently. “Not sure you’re his type, although he does like chicks.” “You little…!” Tom shoved him hard, slamming his hand into Jared’s shoulder right where he’d hit it when he’d fallen off the ladder the week before. It hurt like hell and he stumbled back in surprise, eyes widening. Were they really going to fight it out? Here? Before he had time to compose himself Tom shoved him again and this time he lost his balance and fell back on his ass, scraping the palms of his hands on the rough pavement. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Jensen’s loud voice broke through Jared’s haze and he turned around to find Jensen stalking toward them, eyes blazing. For a short moment he thought Jensen meant him but then the glare set on Tom and the guy took a step back “Hey, Jenny. Me and the kid were just talking,” Tom said casually and Jared had to wonder how stupid he really thought Jensen was. Jensen seemed to be thinking along the same lines because his eyes hardened even further. “You leave him the fuck alone, Tom,” he said in a low and icy voice that sent shivers down Jared’s spine. “Whatever you think he’s got to do with me breaking up with you, well, he doesn’t. I broke up with you because you’re a dickhead and an abusive asshole. So back off.” Tom glared at him and opened his mouth to say something but then seemed to change his mind. Snapping his mouth shut he turned on his heel and stormed out of the school grounds. “You okay?” Jared looked up at him from the gravelly ground, feeling humiliated and angry. “I’m fine,” he said and got to his feet, slapping the dust off his jeans. “What the hell was that?” “I’m sorry. I don’t know why he’s being like that.” “Maybe because he’s an ‘abusive asshole’?” Jared said angrily. “Dude, why didn’t you say something? Did he hurt you?” “What? No. I didn’t mean it like that.” Jensen looked down, clenching his jaw. “I just… He was really pushy, okay? And he didn’t like it when I... when I said no.” Pushy. Like throwing him up against walls and shoving his hand down Jensen’s pants. Like Jared. “But he didn’t… force you?” Jared asked hesitantly. “To, you know, do stuff?” “No, not... that way. He just… Sometimes he didn’t seem to realize how strong he is, that’s all.” This all sounded terribly familiar and Jared felt slightly sick. “I’m sorry,” he said quickly, “about this morning. I shouldn’t have forced you like that.” Jensen frowned but then his face softened and he shook his head. “Jared…” “No.” Jared bit his lip, unable to look at him. “I was out of line and if you don’t want to talk to me anymore I can understand…” “Jared, stop it.” Jensen grabbed him by the chin and forced him to look at him. “Dude, it’s okay. You just caught me of guard, that’s all.” He shrugged. “Forget about it.” Jared swallowed. “You sure?” “Yeah, I’m sure.” Jensen grinned and nudged him playfully. “So, you wanna go to my place and play Madden?” Jared grinned back. “You mean do I want to totally whup your ass at Madden? Yeah, I think I can do that.” “Oh, you’re on!” They walked home, side-by-side, bumping shoulders and sharing grins. The sun played on Jensen’s hair and made the freckles on his face stand out like flecks of gold and he looked so beautiful Jared wanted nothing more than to drag him behind the next tree and kiss him until neither of them could breathe. He didn’t. Instead he challenged Jensen to a race and let him get ahead so he could watch Jensen’s ass move in those tight jeans. It was almost as good.   The school was empty and really boring without the seniors. It was only for three days and then they were free as well but those three days were long and boring and Jared couldn’t help wondering what it would be like next year. A whole winter without Jensen to watch and crush over. Two winters in fact. And Jensen would be off to college… Jared suddenly realized he had no idea where Jensen was going to college. What if he was going somewhere far far away where he’d meet guys who were his age and not stupid high school kids who didn’t even have a driving license so they could sneak off to… Wherever College and meet him. God, that would blow so hard. Jared got teary just thinking about it. “You’re behaving like a girl,” Chad said and popped his gum. “Well, you should know,” Jared bit back. “Chad, I’m talking about losing him. My Jensen!” “Your Jensen? Huh. So he kissing you yet?” Jared sulked. “No.” Chad rolled his eyes. “What’s his problem?” “He’s nice. Too nice. That’s his problem.” “Being nice blows. Or in your case, not.” “I just don’t get it. The two times we did? It was like fire. Literally. I though I’d have scorch marks on my lips.” Jared sighed. “And now? Nothing. Isn’t he supposed to be at the height of his sexual peak or something? Why the hell doesn’t he want me?” Chad shrugged and then asked, “Why don’t you just kiss him? Dude, you’re a giant. Just push him up against a wall and go at it.” Jared shook his head. “I can’t do that.” “Why?” “Because that’s what Tom did. Just took without asking. I’m not gonna be that guy.” ‘Again,’ he added silently. Chad sighed. “Ok, ok. Then how about just asking him? Ask him why he won’t kiss you.” “What if he says it’s because I’m a lousy kisser and he likes me as a friend but nothing more?” “Well, better to know now, right?” Jared bit his lip. They didn’t feel as just friends though. Chad sure never looked at him the way Jensen did. He could see the want in Jensen’s eyes but the guy kept backing away, as if he was restraining himself for Jared’s sake. And that just wouldn’t do. He just wasn’t sure how to approach the problem. They continued to meet up after school. Jensen was obviously enjoying his freedom, usually lounging by the small pool in his backyard whenever Jared arrived, with sunglasses perched on his freckled nose and swim trunks slung low on his hips. They vegged out in the sun, drinking soda and floating lazily in the pool until the sun lowered itself behind the house, casting shadows over the yard. Then they went up to Jensen’s room and played videogames or watched TV. Sometimes Jared would catch Jensen looking at him with this hunger in his eyes that had his heart speeding up but every time he leaned in, Jensen backed away, just as before. It was driving Jared insane. What the hell were they even doing? He touched Chad more these days than he touched Jensen and that was just wrong in so many ways. He didn’t know much about dating but he was pretty sure this wasn’t it. This was just… hanging out. With enough UST to blow up the planet. If nothing changed soon he would either break his promise to himself and just throw Jensen to the ground and molest him, or, to keep that from happening, blow his brains out. He really didn’t see any other option. Thursday night he stood awkwardly at Jensen’s doorstep as he was leaving, feeling as if he might burst if he didn’t say something, but just as he opened his mouth Jensen suddenly asked,” So tomorrow’s your last day at school, right?” Jared blinked. “Yeah.” “Cool. We should do something.” Jared’s idea of ‘something’ involved stripping Jensen naked and licking every drop of sweat off his body. He didn’t think that was what Jensen had in mind. “Sure. Like what?” “How about I borrow Jeff’s truck and we go for a drive?” Jensen suggested. Now that sounded like a real date, not just hanging out. Jared’s heart sped up. Did that mean they were actually moving to the dating stage now? “Sounds good,” he managed to choke out. “Should I bring anything?” he then added because despite evidence to the contrary, aka Ben, Jared’s mom had actually taught her sons some manners. “I’m not quite that easy, you know,” Jensen said stiffly and Jared looked up in alarm. “No! I didn’t mean… I wasn’t…” he stammered and Jensen instantly cracked up. “Dude, I’m joking.” He punched Jared’s shoulder playfully. “You gotta learn to relax, Jare. You’re way too tense. Just bring yourself and maybe a couple of blankets and we should be good.” “Blankets?” “Jeff’s truck’s got a really nice flatbed. Might even fit your long ass legs lying down. Guess we’ll find out. Tomorrow?” And Jared found himself facing a closed door, Jensen’s grin still flashing before his eyes. Jared shifted on the doorstep and nearly fell over from the friction to his supersensitive dick. Damn. For being such a shy virgin Jensen sure was a talented cocktease.   Friday went by in a blur, not that it mattered, not like anyone was paying attention anyway. Even the teachers gave up holding any pretence of teaching and just let their students do pretty much whatever they wanted while dozing off behind their desks. As soon as the bell rang for the last time Jared waved goodbye to an amused Chad and rode his bike home as fast as he could. Blankets, blankets… His mom would probably not appreciate him stealing her nice blankets from the couch so he rummaged through the closets until he found a couple of old woolen blankets that had seen better days. Well, at least they didn’t smell too bad. He contemplated what else he should bring, eyeing the bunch of bananas on the kitchen counter. Just the thought of Jensen eating one was enough to get him hard. He swallowed and opened the fridge instead, staring into it. Unless he stole beer from his dad he didn’t really have any and it was rather short notice to get Chad to hook him up. And bringing soda seemed so… high school. Dammit. He slammed the fridge shut, grabbed two bananas and ran up to his room to add the bag of gummy bears he’d been saving for a rainy day. While there he stripped out of his sweaty clothes and changed into light-brown khaki pants that hung rather low on his hips and a white v-necked t-shirt that showed off his shoulders. Checking himself in the mirror for the last time he slipped on a pair of flip-flops and then hurried to Jensen’s house. Jensen was already out in the driveway, fastening a cooler to the flatbed, and when Jared called out his name he turned to Jared with a huge smile. “Hey! Finally! Was wondering if you’d managed to snatch detention your last day at school,” he said teasingly. “Thought I’d have to bust you out.” “Funny,” Jared bit back but he couldn’t help grinning. “Had to go home first, you know. Not all of us have fancy cars.” “Yeah, yeah,” Jensen said with a dismissive wave. He gave the bindings a last tug before jumping off the flatbed, brushing dust of his knees. He was wearing extremely thin-worn cut-off jeans and a white wifebeater and if Jared hadn’t been sporting a hard-on just from Jensen’s smile that sure would have done the trick. He shifted uncomfortably and hoped he wasn’t too obvious. Jensen looked him over and quirked an eyebrow. “So… banana?” “What?” Jared’s face blushed deep red and he fought the urge to cover himself. “No! I was just… I…” Jensen stared at him and then he started laughing. “The fruit, Jared. In your bag.” Jared blinked and then looked at the fruit in question, poking up from the bag holding the blankets. “Oh. Uh, well… In case we get hungry?” he offered, feeling like a complete idiot. Jensen grinned up at him. “I packed us food but you’re right, with your appetite it’s better to bring extra.” He pulled out the two bananas, barely holding his laughter in check as he jumped back up on the flatbed, unlocked the cooler and put the fruit inside it. Jared stood back and tried to keep from ogling Jensen’s ass too much but when he bent over it was pretty much impossible not to. Before Jared had time to avert his eyes Jensen straightened up and caught him staring and for a moment it was hard to see which one was more embarrassed. But then Jensen laughed softly and put a hand on Jared’s shoulder as he jumped down from the back of the car. “You ready to go, tiger?” “Yeah,” Jared said, relieved. Maybe Jensen didn’t mind being ogled. After all, with an ass like that, he was probably used to it. The truck was spacious and it was a great change from Jared’s family’s Honda to not have to pull his knees up to his ears in order to sit in the front seat. He sat back and closed his eyes, one arm dangling out the window to catch a little of the afternoon breeze since even the air conditioning in the car couldn’t properly fight the heat. Summer was definitely here and the last couple of days melting in the sun by Jensen’s pool had deepened Jared’s tan to a golden brown. Once or twice he glanced over to Jensen and caught him looking back and the heat of his gaze was enough to make sweat run down Jared’s back. They finally got off the main road and followed a narrow dirt path for a couple of miles until Jensen finally stopped the truck by a small lake, secluded by tall trees. When he turned the engine off all that could be heard were a few birds twittering and the ticking of the engine cooling down. For a moment they just sat there, gazing out over the lake, the silence somewhat overwhelming. Then Jensen looked over at Jared and grinned. “Last one in is a pussy,” he said and before Jared could say, ‘Huh?’ Jensen was out of the car and toeing off his sneakers. “Are you completely insane?” Jared yelled but he was already getting out as well, kicking off his flip-flops and tugging at his t-shirt. “It’s probably freezing!” “Only one way to find out,” Jensen yelled back and then he was running down to the lake, his t-shirt landing in a heap on the grass moments before he jumped in. There was a loud splash and then he shot up, cursing and laughing. “Jesus fucking Christ! For a moment Jared stood stock still, the sight of a wet Jensen in nothing but those ratty old jeans making his body misbehave in the worst way possible. He’d planned to take off his pants and just dive in in his boxer briefs since the prospect of wearing wet pants the rest of the day didn’t really sit that well with him but now the thought of Jensen seeing the state of his dick had him hesitating. Christ, Jensen hadn’t said anything about going swimming. It just wasn’t fair springing things like swimming and water and nakedness on people, completely unprepared! “Dude, are you coming or what?” Jensen shouted and ducked under again before emerging, shaking the water out of his hair. Jared swallowed. “Uh… yeah. I just…” He started working on his pants, struggling with the button until he remembered it was a slide-in hook and finally got it open. When he glanced up Jensen was lying on his back in the water, floating peacefully. Okay, problem solved. All he had to do was get into the water before Jensen caught sight of his little problem. That shouldn’t be too hard, no pun intended. He shimmied quickly out of the khaki pants and kicked them to the side, then ran across the grass and jumped into the lake without hesitation. Oh holy fucking Jesus!! It was like getting electrocuted, he imagined, if electricity was really, really freezing cold. He was aware of resurfacing and possibly gulping in air though he couldn’t really feel it in his lungs, and then flailing around in panic when he started to sink again. It wasn’t like he couldn’t swim, he’d just momentarily forgotten how. Just before his head went under someone grabbed at his arm and pulled him up and the next he knew he was being held under the chin with his head resting on Jensen’s shoulder. “Jesus, Jare, you okay?” “Gah!” he gasped and clawed at Jensen’s head, trying to catch hold. He was gonna sink and he was gonna drown and he would never lose his virginity ever! “Hey, hey! Calm down. Jared, listen to me, you gotta relax. I’ve got you, I’m not gonna let anything happen to you.” Jared wasn’t sure if it was the words or Jensen’s calm voice whispering them in his ear or possibly the warmth of Jensen’s cheek pressed against his own but he stopped struggling and breathed out, letting his limbs go lax in the water. “That’s right. Just like that,” Jensen murmured and shifted his hold so he held Jared’s head under the chin with one hand and the other arm crossing his chest. “You okay?” “Ye-eah,” he breathed shakily. “I should have warned you, I’m sorry. It’s a lot colder than you’d think.” Jared nodded but he was already feeling better as his body adjusted to the temperature. “It’s okay. Just took me off guard, that’s all.” Jensen tightened his hold and Jared closed his eyes. This was actually very nice, now he was over the whole ‘I’m gonna die!’ thing. Water lapped at his chin and the sun shone down on his face and Jensen’s felt warm and safe behind him. He breathed in deep and turned his head a little until Jensen’s warm breath brushed his cheek. He thought he could feel Jensen’s lips brush his skin but that might have been accidental. Didn’t make it any less nice. “You wanna get out of the water?” Jensen asked after a while. “Warm up a little?” “Yeah, ok,” he said sleepily even though he was hard put to move. “I didn’t bring any towels,” he then added with frown “Guess I’ll have to warm you then.” And this time it was definitely a kiss as Jensen’s warm lips pressed briefly against his temple, before he started swimming them to shore. “I can swim myself, you know,” Jared said as he let Jensen tug him along, not making any attempt to do so. “I know,” Jensen laughed, “but it’s good practice. Never know when you might need to rescue a Sasquatch from drowning.” He ducked from Jared’s lame swap at his head and then suddenly they were in shallow water and stumbling onto land. Jared sat shivering on the grass while Jensen fetched the blankets. He put one over Jared’s shoulder and he bundled himself up in it while he watched Jensen spread the other blanket on the ground before fetching the cooler from the flatbed. The wet jeans clung to Jensen like they were painted on him and drops of water kept running down from his hair and onto his shoulders before trickling down his freckled chest. He sat down on the blanket and opened the cooler, pulling out two beers. He handed one over to Jared who swept his own wet mop of hair from his eyes before accepting with a strained smile. “You okay?” Jensen asked, looking worried. “Did you swallow any? Water, I mean.” Jared waved his hand dismissively. “No, I’m okay. Thank you,” he added after drinking down half the bottle. Apparently almost drowning made him thirsty. Jensen frowned. “What for?” “Not letting me drown.” Jensen shook his head with a smile. “Dude, it’s only like seven feet. You’d have popped up eventually. I’m surprised you didn’t touch bottom with those long legs.” “Maybe.” Jared shrugged. “Still, you never know.” He drained the rest of the beer and shrugged the blanket off his shoulders before laying down on the other one, next to Jensen. The sun did a better job of warming him up than the blanket anyway. That, and Jensen’s gaze. Jared squinted up at him and smiled which made Jensen blush but he didn’t look away. Instead he reached out to run his fingers through Jared’s hair, pushing it away from his eyes and tugging it behind his ears, the same way he’d done that night at the party, in what seemed a lifetime ago. “Hey,” Jared said softly. “Hey,” Jensen whispered back. “Can I ask you something?” Jensen raised one eyebrow. “Okay.” He slid down until they were laying side by side, Jared flat on his back, Jensen turned toward him with one hand propped under his chin. “Fire away,” he said lightly but there was a guarded look in his eyes that made Jared hesitate. “I just… What are we doing?” he quickly blurted out before he could change his mind. Jensen frowned. “What do you mean?” “Us. Are we…? Is this a date? Are we dating?” A smile tugged at Jensen’s lips. “What do you think?” “That’s just it. I don’t know.” He swallowed. “You keep asking me over but we never… do anything. Like before. Was I… Was I bad?” Jensen stared down at him. “God, Jared. No! You were anything but bad.” “So… you just don’t like me anymore like that? Is that it? Cos I just don’t get it. Wasn’t it hot? I thought it was hot. I mean, you were really, really hot and it felt really good and I thought you’d liked it but then you won’t even touch me and I just don’t know what…umph!” It was just as he remembered except better because Jensen smelled of water and sunshine and tasted sweet with beer and if anything he’d gotten better at kissing. Which really didn’t sound possible because he’d been so damn good before but somehow it still seemed that way. Or maybe it was Jared that was getting better at kissing back, that sounded more likely. And why was he thinking so much when there was kissing to be done? Jensen’s hands were in Jared’s hair, fingers getting caught in the tangled damp mass, and he kissed like he’d been starving for it for weeks. If Jared hadn’t been lying down already he’d have toppled over from lack of oxygen by now. He let his hands slide shakily from where he’d been gripping Jensen’s biceps, and over to his back, spreading his fingers to span as much skin as he could. It was warm from the sun and damp with water and sweat and he didn’t think he’d ever felt anything as amazing. Jensen whimpered into his mouth when the tip of Jared’s pinky slipped under the waistband of his jeans and the sound was enough to make Jared hard as rock. He bucked up and clawed frantically at Jensen’s jeans, finally hooking his fingers into the belt loops and hoisting him up until he lay on top of him, damp jeans rasping Jared’s thighs. He suddenly remembered he was only wearing his boxers but he couldn’t really care less, not when he could feel Jensen’s dick hard against his. “Oh God,” he managed when Jensen pulled away briefly for air. “You still like me then?” “I still like you,” Jensen shuddered against his neck. “Wanted you, so much. Been killing me.” “So why…?” “Wanted to touch you and kiss you and, God, taste you.” He sucked on Jared’s neck and he let his head fall back, panting for breath. “You taste so good. Too good. You drive me insane and I can’t… I can’t…” He sucked in his breath and started to slide off but Jared held on to his hips, keeping him still. “Can’t what?” Jared groaned. “Oh Jesus.” Jensen was trembling, body rigid, but he didn’t try to move away again. “I can’t stop. You… What you do to me… I want you so much.” “Then don’t stop. Want you too. Please, Jen.” “I can’t… I shouldn’t… I won’t be able to stop. Jared, I need to stop!” He jerked away and rolled off until he lay on his back with one arm slung over his eyes, mouth open as his chest rose and fell with his ragged breathing. Jared sat up slowly. His dick was so hard it was aching but for once he didn’t feel embarrassed about the obvious tent in his thin boxers. “Jen?” he asked cautiously. “I’m sorry. I just…” Jensen gulped in air, his free hand pressing down on the bulge in his pants. “Oh God.” “Is this the age thing again? Because I don’t care about that.” “I do!” Jensen lifted the arm away from his eyes. His pupils were blown wide and he swallowed hard. “God, Jare, you’re only fifteen years old!” “So?” Jared threw himself down, pressing the heels of his hands into his eye sockets, as he groaned in frustration. “Jesus, Jen, what the hell does it matter? Half the guys in my class are having sex and most of the girls too.” Jensen shook his head. “Yeah, and half of them are lying about it. Doesn’t matter anyway, Jare, this is different.” “Why?” Jared turned his head and stared at him. “Because we’re both guys? Are you kidding me?” “Jare…” “No. It’s stupid. And… and bigoted. So if I were a girl you’d have me halfway to heaven by now but because I’ve got a dick we’ve got to wait… how long?” He sat up, glaring down at Jensen. “‘Til I’m seventeen? No. No way.” “It’s not just because you’re a guy. It’s a big deal, ok? Sex is a frigging big deal!” Jared huffed in frustration. “How do you know if you’ve never had any? Don’t put this on me just because you’re scared!” Jensen sat up as well, glaring at him indignantly. “I’m not scared! I’m trying to protect you! I’m doing this for you!” “Well, I don’t want you doing this for me.” Jared got to his feet and grabbed his pants, yanking them on in anger. “It’s not yours to decide whether I’m ready or not. I’m not a kid!” “Jared…” Jensen sighed and got to his feet as well. “I’m not saying you are, I’m just…” “No.” Jensen threw up his hands in frustration. “I don’t want to be the guy you look back on later, thinking ‘he’s the reason I’m fucked up,’ ok? I just… I can’t be that guy!” “Jesus, Jen. I’ve already told you, you’re not! I don’t know who fucked you up but whatever he was like, you’re nothing like him.” “You don’t know…” “No, I don’t. Because you never tell me anything! Maybe if you did I’d understand where this was coming from.” Jensen dropped his gaze, his jaw clenching. “It’s nothing.” Jared sighed. “Don’t do that. Talk to me. Tell me!” “Nothing happened, ok? It was just… this guy. I had a crush on him and he said if I did… stuff, he’d like me. That’s all.” Jared suddenly felt cold despite the warm sun beating down on his back. “What kind of stuff?” “Touch him. And… suck him. And I did and then he wanted more and I got scared and said no and… he got mad.” It was chilling how small Jensen’s voice got, his shoulders slumping as if the memory was shrinking him. “Shit.” Jared didn’t really know what to say, how much he actually wanted to know. “How mad?” he finally asked, because somehow he couldn’t not know. Jensen swallowed. “Mad enough to try and take it anyway.” “Jesus!” “It’s okay,” Jensen hurried to add. “Chris walked in on us and that was it.” He smiled half-heartedly. “Even back then he was one scary kid when he got mad. Knocked the guy over the head with his baseball bat.” Kid? Pieces of the puzzle were starting to fall into place and the picture they were revealing wasn’t a pretty one. “Jensen, when was this? How old were you?” “Four years ago. I was fourteen.” “Jesus!” Jensen finally looked up, his eyes hard and determined. “That’s why, ok? I won’t do that to you.” “Jen, you would never do that to me. Never.” Jared sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, trying to find the right words. “Look, I get it. You think I’m too young to know what I’m getting myself into. That I’m just going along with what you want, the way you did, right? Well, I’m not because I’m not like that. Believe me, if there was something I didn’t want, I’d be the first one to pipe up.” “You might not. I didn’t.” “You did, Jen. You said no. And he was an asshole and didn’t care. That won’t happen with us because you’re not that guy!” When Jensen still didn’t look convinced Jared sighed and pulled himself up to his full height, something he hardly ever did, more used to slouching ever since he shot up way past everyone in his class two years ago. “Seriously, Jen. Even if you were that kind of asshole, I’m still bigger than you.” “What? No, you’re not,” Jensen protested. “By at least a couple of inches, man.” Jensen glared at him and Jared sighed. “I’m talking about my height, you idiot, not… other parts.” He grinned. “There I know I’m bigger.” “Shut up.” But a smile tugged at the corner of Jensen’s lips and Jared grinned as well, noticing that Jensen didn’t deny it. “The point I’m trying to make is, that it’s not like you could force me even if you wanted to. I can hold my own, man. I outgrew being bullied years ago.” “But…” Jared took hold of Jensen’s head and pressed their lips together, kissing Jensen until his knees buckled and he clawed at Jared’s shoulders, pulling him even closer. Jared let one hand slid down to cup Jensen’s ass, letting him feel just how hard Jared was for him as he fit them tight together. Then he pulled away and rested his forehead against Jensen’s, both of them breathing heavily. “Do you realize how stupid this is? You’re afraid to kiss me because you might lose control and I was afraid to kiss you because, hell, I saw the way Tom was with you and I swore I wouldn’t be like that.” “You’re not. Jare…” “And you’re not anything like the asshole who screwed you over. Ok? So how ‘bout we both stop worrying so much and just… have this? Can we have this? Please?” Jensen swallowed. “Yeah. Yeah, Jare,” he finally said and Jared breathed out in relief. They kissed again, slower this time, tasting each other’s mouths and breathing each other’s air. Jensen didn’t object when Jared tugged him back down on the blanket, just folded his knees and went with. He still seemed hesitant to take the lead so Jared let himself fall down on the blanket, pulling Jensen with him, never letting go of his mouth. The kiss got deeper and more heated but Jared could feel Jensen was still holding back, the sharp hitches of his breath and the way he held himself up on his elbows, letting their torsos touch as little as possible, a clear sign of his nervousness. Jared reluctantly let go of Jensen’s lips and mouthed his way along the jaw instead, feeling a hint of stubble snagging at his lips and tongue. Jensen was shivering now, clenching his jaw and tightening his fingers in Jared’s hair. He had to be up on his toes to manage to keep his distance and Jared just couldn’t have that. He let his hands slide down Jensen’s back and to his ass, slipping his fingers under the waistband of his jeans and over the smooth skin of his buttocks. Jensen jerked his hips, involuntarily it seems because he lost his precious balance and oomphed when his chest hit Jared’s, who wasted no time pressing him even closer until their erections were aligned and grinding against each other. “This feels familiar,” Jared murmured and Jensen laughed shakily. “Want to come in your pants again or…” he tugged at Jensen’s jeans, “take these off?” Jensen stiffened. “We shouldn’t…” “We’re not gonna fuck, Jen, ok? Not today. Remember, you can’t hurt me and I’m not gonna hurt you. Just… let me feel you.” Jensen shook in his arms. “Ok, ok,” he finally whispered and Jared kissed his shoulder. He tugged at Jensen’s jeans until they slid past his hipbones and he could finally feel the smooth skin under his hands and the coarse brush of Jensen’s pubic hairs against his stomach. Just a little further and Jensen’s cock sprang free, slapping Jared’s thigh eagerly. He groaned, his hips jerking, and Jared sucked in his breath. “Fuck, you make me so hard. Jesus!” “I… Please,” Jensen whimpered, one hand fluttering down and hovering at Jared’s hips. “You wanna feel it? You wanna feel how hard you make me?” Jensen let his forehead rest on Jared’s shoulder, shuddering. “Yes. Please.” “Do it. C’mon, Jen, strip me.” Jensen hitched his breath and for a moment Jared thought maybe he’d gone too far with the whole toppy bottom thing and made Jensen regress rather than push him forward, but then suddenly Jensen growled and started tugging frantically at Jared’s pants as he sucked at his neck. After finally figuring out the sliding button thing he ripped down the zipper and then he had his hand down the front, cupping Jared’s cock briefly through his underwear before deciding that wasn’t enough and started tugging at the waistband, trying to get them off him as well. Jared lifted his hips to help him along, his breath becoming shallower the more he got turned on. Jesus, Jensen was toppy as hell when he allowed himself to let go and it was so goddamn hot Jared could hardly breathe. He had a feeling Jensen hadn’t been allowed to ever take the upper hand with Tom – he hadn’t seemed the kind of guy who’d like being bossed around in that way – and now Jensen’s more assertive side was breaking out big time. Not that Jared was about to complain, he was too busy trying not to come before they’d even started. “Jesus, what you do to me,” Jensen growled. “I want to taste you. Want to suck that big cock.” And apparently he had a filthy mouth too. Like Jared’s mom used to say, it was always the quiet ones. Although he wasn’t sure this was what she’d had in mind. “Okay,” Jared gasped. “Yeah. Do it.” Jensen slid down, biting and licking his way down Jared’s chest. He sucked each nipple quickly into his mouth, taking them between his teeth and nibbling lightly before letting them go and moving on. Jared let his head fall back, overcome by the sensation, and by the time Jensen reached his cock he was sure all it would take was feeling Jensen’s hot breath on him to make him come. “Fuck, you weren’t kidding,” Jensen was muttering against his stomach. “You are a big boy.” “And still growing,” Jared moaned. “If it’s too much for you…” he started and then lost what little brain function he had when Jensen eagerly sucked him into his mouth. Later that night he would lay in bed and wonder, without really wanting to, when and with whom Jensen had learned to give blowjobs like that and get disturbing images of a fourteen year old Jensen on his knees while some asshole who looked remarkably much like Tom, fucked his mouth. It made him angry and then it made him hard and then it made him feel like a total creep for being unable to keep his hands from reaching down and jerking off, still with the image of young Jensen staring up at him, eyes wide and mouth wrapped around his dick. Fourteen! Two years younger than Jared himself was now. And even if he’d been crushing on Jensen for those two years he knew he hadn’t been ready then to do anything like that. Because Jensen was right. Sex was a big deal. Even now. And the thought of being forced to do anything he wasn’t ready to do… It made his heart speed up and not in a good way. But right then he couldn’t think of anything except the heat of Jensen’s mouth, the slick slide of his tongue as it curled around his dick and the small noises he made as Jared reached down and slid his fingers into Jensen’s hair, pressing him closer without even meaning to. It was the most amazing thing he’d ever felt and if he’d died and gone to heaven right then he wouldn’t have been able to tell the difference. Jensen sucked him in deep and Jared jerked his hips, unable to keep from thrusting further into that heat. Jensen coughed as he pulled off and looked up at him, his lips swollen and spit-slick as he panted shallowly. “You’re gonna choke me, man, if you do that,” he said and pushed Jared’s hips down, holding him still. “Sorry, sorry. Didn’t mean… God! Just… It’s so good.” “Yeah?” “Fuck, yeah. More, I want… Please, Jen.” Jensen licked his lips, then pursed them in thought. “Ok, let’s try this,” he finally said and hooked his thumbs under Jared’s knees, pushing them up. “If you want to stop at any time, just let me know, and I will. I promise.” Jared wanted to ask what he was planning but then Jensen sucked him into his mouth again and he forgot everything else. Making sure to keep his hips still on the ground he threw one arm over his eyes, the other hand fisting the blanket beneath him. It was all so incredibly good and still he couldn’t help feeling he wanted something more. Something… Oh God! “Wha…? Jesus!” Jensen let his cock go with a wet pop and kissed his thigh. “Relax, it will be good, I promise,” he said soothingly and wriggled his finger a little, making Jared suck in his breath. “It’s pretty good right now!” Jared gasped. “So, so weird but good. Very, very good.” Jensen chuckled, puffs of air grazing the head of Jared’s dick. “It will get even better once I…” He pushed in a little further and Jared was just about to tell him it couldn’t really get much better than this when the tip of Jensen’s finger pushed against something inside him and white sparks exploded before his eyes. “There,” Jensen exclaimed in triumph and then sucked Jared down as deep as he could. It was all over and done with then. To be frank Jared was amazed he had lasted this long with his very first blowjob. Add to that whatever the hell Jensen had been doing… If he never regained muscle power in his legs again it would still be worth it. He was faintly aware of Jensen crawling up his body until he was nuzzled against his neck, nibbling playfully at his ear before relaxing to lay down beside him. “Good?” he asked gleefully. “Nghamahba,” Jared managed and Jensen laughed into his ear. “Really? That good?” “Nghuymy,” Jared said and shuddered violently. He turned his head to give Jensen a sloppy kiss but he moved away, frowning. “I just blew you, man. I taste like come.” Jared blinked. “So?” “It’s gross, Jare.” “I think it’s hot,” Jared said and put his hand behind Jensen’s neck, pulling him in. He did taste weird but it wasn’t as if Jared had never tasted himself. And he figured if Jensen could stand having the taste of Jared’s come in his mouth Jared himself really had no grounds to complain. Jensen resisted slightly at first but then he relaxed into the kiss, allowing Jared to lick into his mouth and suck on his tongue. When they finally pulled apart they were both panting and Jensen gazed at him in wonder. “I’ve never done that,” he said dazedly and Jared frowned in confusion. “Blowed someone? But you said…” “No. Kissed after… you know.” He blushed. “You didn’t think it was gross?” Jared just stared at him. “Like kissing you could ever be gross.” That earned him a small smile. “Not even if I got the flu and had snot all over?” He pretended to think it over. “Well, I’d blow your nose first, I guess. But after that? Snog central, man.” “Snog?” “Snog. You know, snog.” At Jensen’s clueless face he sighed dramatically. “It’s British for kissing. Or making out, I‘m not sure. Don’t you watch Buffy?” “Is that the one with the vampires?” Jensen scrunched up his nose. “I don’t really like sci-fi that much.” Jared gasped. “You… Oh wow. I’m not sure we can be friends anymore,” he exclaimed dramatically, “That’s like blasphemy, man. Buffy’s not sci-fi. It’s life in its truest form! Philosophical and deep and…” “Vampires.” “That’s it. We’re having a Buffy marathon. I’ll convert you yet!” Jensen laughed and rolled over to his back. “Yeah, yeah. You try, big guy,” he chuckled and closed his eyes against the sun. Jared watched the fine line at the corner of Jensen’s eyes crinkle and the shadows of his eyelashes play across his cheekbones. He really was amazingly beautiful and it struck Jared how lucky he was that Jensen had so much as even looked at him, let alone become his… boyfriend. Jensen could have any guy he wanted and still he’d set his eyes on Jared. He had no idea why, he really couldn’t think of anything that made him special. He’d always been goofy and klutzy and after getting his growth spurt which had him towering over everyone else, he’d felt increasingly out of place and awkward. And yet here he was, basking in the sun with the school’s Wonder Boy, having just had the best orgasm of his entire life, coming down Jensen’s throat. Oh shit. He looked down at Jensen’s cock that had started to go soft, tilting to the side. He’d been so caught up in getting his first blowjob he’d totally forgotten about reciprocating. Jensen probably thought he was a complete selfish bastard. Or even worse, scared. He glanced up at Jensen’s face. A soft smile was playing upon his lips and his eyes were moving slightly behind thin eyelids. Jared didn’t think he was asleep, just basking in the sun, letting the heat lull him into a dozy state. He looked totally relaxed and happy, as if he didn’t care at all that he’d been left hard and unsatisfied. As if this whole thing had just been about Jared and giving him what he wanted. But Jared remembered the hunger in Jensen’s eyes and the almost desperate way he’d kissed him, like he was going to die if he didn’t get more. Tentatively he reached out and ran his index finger up Jensen’s cock. It jumped just as Jensen drew in his breath and Jared glanced up at him again. His eyes were still shut but tighter now and his lips were slightly parted. As Jared watched Jensen’s tongue darted out to lick over his lips, almost nervously. “I want to make you feel good too,” Jared whispered and let his fingers run up and down Jensen’s dick again, slightly firmer this time. “You don’t have to…” Jensen choked out but his hips jerked and he sucked in his breath again when Jared’s thumb grazed the head. “Oh God. Jared…” “I want to,” he repeated and shimmied down the blanket until he was hovering inches above Jensen’s now fully hard cock. “I want to know what it’s like. I want to… taste you.” “Jesus!” Jensen groaned and slung one arm over his eyes. “Jared…” “Just let me know if I’m doing something wrong,” he said and before he could change his mind he reached out with his tongue and licked a path up Jensen’s cock. Huh, that was… strange. Not bad strange just… strange. He ignored Jensen’s small gasps of ‘Oh God’ and ‘So good’ and concentrated on how it felt as he continued licking. It tasted slightly salty but not unpleasant. The precome was a bit sticky, not that that was anything new to him, he just wasn’t used to it clinging to his tongue like that. But he was even more fascinated by the softness of the skin. It felt almost like velvet under his tongue. He wondered if his own was as soft as this to the touch. Sure it felt soft under his fingers but against the slickness of his tongue it was a whole other experience. He wanted to ask Jensen about it but decided it could wait, especially when he felt Jensen’s hand fumbling at his head, finally sliding trembling fingers into his hair and altering between tugging and stroking as if he couldn’t make up his mind what to do. The strokes made Jared feel warm in his belly but the tugs had heat shoot to his groin and he felt his own cock stir lazily under his thigh. He shifted on the blanket, moaning when the rough surface scraped against his still sensitive cock. But this wasn’t about him. This was about Jensen. Jared ignored his own problem for now and concentrated on the task at hand, licking his lips slick before sliding them over the head of Jensen’s cock, sucking him into his mouth. “Jesus! Jesus fucking Christ!” Jensen bucked as he tugged forcefully at Jared’s hair, hard enough that it hurt but damn, in such a good way. He moaned around Jensen’s cock, letting it slide further into his mouth before raising his head so it slipped almost all the way out, only leaving the head inside the cave of his mouth. Jensen was panting rapidly, the air rasping in his throat, and the hand that wasn’t tangled in Jared’s hair slammed repeatedly down on the blanket, palm flat. “Oh God, oh God…” Jared sucked him in again, the hand that had been resting on Jensen’s thigh slipping up to stroke lightly against his balls. “Oh fuck!” That was all the warning he got before Jensen went absolutely still and then he was arching off the blanket, spurts of come hitting the back of Jared’s throat. He coughed and swallowed, too surprised to even consider pulling off, with drops of come slipping out of his mouth and running down his chin. He kept Jensen’s cock in his mouth, loving the way it twitched as it slowly softened, running his tongue in slow circles around the head until Jensen whimpered and weakly tried to push him off. Then he let it slide out with a wet pop, wiping his face dry on Jensen’s thigh before looking up, hope in his eyes, “Was it good?” he asked and Jensen choked out a weak laughter, his whole body shuddering. “You… you could say that,” he groaned and untangled his fingers from Jared’s hair, patting him awkwardly. “Christ, Jare, you trying to kill me?” Jared grinned. “So you liked it?” “Fuck, yeah.” Jensen opened one eye and glanced down at him. “Come here,” he said and tugged on Jared’s hair. “Want to kiss you.” “You sure?” Jared teased as he slid up until he was hovering over Jensen, smiling down at him. “Someone told me kissing after a blowjob was gross.” “Someone was very wrong,” Jensen growled and pulled him down, licking his way inside Jared’s mouth. The kiss turned softer and lighter as it went on until they were merely nibbling at each other, smiling and laughing into each other’s mouths. “You taste better than me,” Jensen said suddenly with a smile. “Guess it’s all that innocence.” “Really? I’m thinking it’s the candy,” Jared said with a contemplative nod. “I eat lots of candy. Lots and lots of candy. Makes me all sweet like.” “Yeah? So what do I taste of?” “Beer.” Jared deadpanned and then oomphed when Jensen elbowed him. “Hey, it’s good beer.” “Talking of which…” Jared reluctantly allowed Jensen to roll away from under him and crawl over to the cooler. “You hungry?” Jensen asked over his shoulder, smirking when he caught Jared staring at his ass. Jared’s stomach growled. “I’ll take that as a yes,” Jensen said with a laugh and started pulling food out of the cooler.   They ate sandwiches and Doritos and swallowed it down with beer. Then Jared tried deepthroating the banana which had Jensen first choking with laughter and then his eyes heat up and before Jared had any time to react he was being pushed down on the blanket and kissed to within an inch of his life, with Jensen’s hand around his dick and the banana squished into the blanket under his shoulder. Not that he was complaining. The rest of the day was spent talking and kissing and touching and finally dozing off in the sun. Jared groaned when Jensen nudged him awake some time later, finding that the sun had disappeared behind the trees and shadows were cast over where they lay. He shivered, his skin covered in goose bumps and they got dressed in a hurry, packing up the remains of the food and rolling up the blankets before stacking everything onto the car. “Never tried the flatbed,” Jared said mournfully as they got into the car and Jensen looked over at him with a smile. “Next time,” he said and Jared smiled back. Next time sounded good. They drove home in comfortable silence, Jensen’s hand drifting over every now and then to stroke Jared’s thigh or clutch his knee. When they finally pulled up outside Jared’s house he grabbed the door handle and then looked over at Jensen, suddenly awkward. “So…” he said, licking his lips nervously. “Tomorrow?” Jensen smiled and started to nod but then he suddenly frowned. “Oh. Damn. We’re going to visit my grandma this weekend. I’d totally forgotten,” he said apologetically. “Monday?” “Yeah, sure.” Jared gave him a smile that he hoped looked genuine. Two days without Jensen! He wasn’t sure he could survive that. “Alright.” Jensen gave him a nod and Jared opened the door and started to move out of the car when Jensen suddenly grabbed his arm and pulled him back in, kissing him hard. Then he let Jared go so abruptly he lost his balance and almost fell out of the car, eyes wide in shock. “I’ll be thinking of you the whole time,” Jensen said, slightly out of breath, and this time Jared’s smile was blinding. “With your grandma? You naughty boy.” Jensen smirked but his cheeks pinked shyly. “Funny. I’ll call you, ok?” “Yeah. Ok.” He stood watching as the car pulled away from the curb and until it disappeared around the curve before heading inside, grinning like a fool. He toed off his flip-flops in the hallway and started for the kitchen, but was suddenly confronted with Ben. “Hey, is dinner ready…” he started to ask but Ben shook his head and fixed him with a blunt look. “They saw you,” he said quietly. “Way to go to kiss your boyfriend in broad daylight, bro, right in front of our house.” “What?” “They’re in there waiting for you. Just thought I’d warn you.” And then he slipped by and up the stairs, leaving Jared to stare at the kitchen door, heart hammering in his chest. Oh shit.   For a moment he contemplated turning around and running out but in the end it wouldn’t solve anything, only make things worse. Instead he took a deep breath and pushed the door open. His parents were sitting at the kitchen table, a casserole bubbling on the stove. The tick-tick of the clock on the wall seemed to echo loudly in the silence. “Hey,” he said, not really knowing how to act. “What’s up?” His mother looked up at him. She didn’t seem mad, more shocked and hurt, and Jared wasn’t sure which was worse. “Come and sit down, Jared,” she said quietly and he swallowed the lump in his throat before walking over and pulling out a chair opposite them, sitting down. “Is there something you want to tell us?” she continued in the same quiet voice that shook slightly at the edges. Jared dropped his gaze, staring down at the kitchen table. It showed its years in scratches and glass rings, blotted and discolored by years of loving treatment. “Do I really have to?” he finally asked. “Don’t you know already? Ben told me you saw…” He stopped. “Oh Jared.” His mother reached out over the table and took his hand, clutching it tight. “Why didn’t you just tell us?” He lifted his eyes then, relieved beyond belief when he saw the love and concern in her eyes but his breath hitched when he looked over at his dad who was still staring down at his hands on the table, refusing to look up. “Because… I didn’t know how you’d react. I didn’t want to disappoint you.” “Oh sweetie, you could never disappoint us,” his mother said with tears in her eyes, tightening her grasp even further. “No? Then why won’t dad even look at me?” he asked, his breath hitching. His mother looked over at her husband in alarm. “Gerald?” His dad shook his head, mouth set in a thin line. “No. The boy is only fifteen. Whatever he thinks he is, it’s just hormones. I won’t listen to this.” “The boy is your son,” she said, voice shaking. “If he wants to talk about this it’s our job to listen.” “If he’s my son then he’s not… that, and there’s nothing to talk about!” “Gerald! Listen to yourself! What is wrong with you?” Jared stared at them, eyes darting from one to the other. His parents had always stood together no matter what and now this, no he, was breaking them apart. Just like what happened with Jensen’s parents. It was all Jared’s fault. He’d brought this upon them. “Don’t,” he said, breath catching in his throat. “Don’t talk like that. Dad, I’m almost sixteen and I know, ok? I’m not making this up, it’s not just a phase. I know.” “How can you know? How can you possibly know?” His father’s voice rose, shaking slightly. “Just because some pretty boy flashes his eyes at you… And how old is he anyway? I could have him arrested! Using your innocence…” “Dad! No one is using me. I’ve known for a long time, ok? Two years! I’ve known for two years. It’s what I am and it has nothing to do with Jensen.” “Jared, please,” his mother pleaded. “Your dad just needs some time to think it over. Let’s not do this.” “I’m not doing anything! You know this? This is why I didn’t tell you.” He was crying openly now, tears running down his face, and still his father refused to look at him. “I’m still me. I’m the same one I’ve always been. How can you be like this, dad? How can you…?” He stood up, the chair toppling to the floor with a crash behind him. “I’m gay. I’ve always been gay, I’m always gonna be gay. Dad, look at me! Look at me!” His father finally raised his head then, lips set thin in anger but his eyes were rimmed red and he was swallowing repeatedly. “I thought you’d be disappointed in me but I never expected to be disappointed in you. But you… You disappoint me, dad. After everything you two have taught me about tolerance and respect for other people this is how you react?” He stepped back, shaking his head. “I think that says a lot more about you than me.” He ran out despite his mother’s cry for him to stay and up the stairs to his room, slamming the door locked behind him. It was childish but at the moment he just didn’t care. He tumbled into bed and pulled the covers over his head as he sobbed into his pillow. Oh God. His dad hated him! His own dad! How could he? And now his parent’s were gonna get divorced just like Jensen’s and it would all be his fault. Unless… unless they decided to kick him out instead. Could they do that? He wasn’t even sixteen yet, where was he supposed to go? Would Jensen’s parents allow him to stay with him? God, this was going to up Jensen’s underage paranoia to a hundred. But his dad couldn’t really have Jensen arrested, could he? Could he? Shaking Jared fumbled in the pocket of his pants for his phone but came up empty-handed. Dammit! He must have dropped it somewhere, the truck or maybe even at the lake. Great! He had to let Jensen know somehow but more than that he just needed to hear his voice, needed to hear him say everything would be ok. Just then there was a soft knock on his door and he stiffened. “Jared, sweetie, can I come in?” “I want to be alone,” he choked out. “Please.” Not like he could really refuse her anything. He got slowly up and to the door, unlocking it before returning to the bed and burying into the covers. He heard her come in and quietly close the door behind her and then the bed dipped when she sat down on the edge. “I’m sorry,” she said softly. “It just… It was a shock. We had no idea.” He stayed stubbornly silent. He’d already said everything he had to say anyway. “Your dad… he’ll come around. Just give him a bit of time.” “He hates me,” Jared sniffled, unable to keep quiet any longer. She sighed. “Jared, no. Your father could never hate you. He’s just confused and scared. We both are.” Scared? Jared frowned. “Jensen would never hurt me. He’s a good guy. He…” “It’s not that. I’m sure he’s nice. But you know what people are like, honey. Once word gets out… There will be all kinds of trouble.” Jared turned on the bed and looked up at his mom. “I’m not stupid, mom. I know what people will say. And might do. So what? You want me to lie? To start dating girls and pretend to be the son you want me to be?” She shook her head. “Jared, you know it’s not like that. I love you just the way you are. We both do.” “Well, this is what I am, mom. I’m not gonna hide it. And Jensen, he’s great, mom. He’s like the most wonderful guy ever. And I know he’s a bit older than me but not that much. He’s only nineteen, not like he’s a dirty old man.” “Nineteen is still older,” she pointed out. “He might expect things you’re not ready to give. I just don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be seeing him.” Jared stared at her. “Mom, are you serious?” “Honey, you’re only fifteen…” “Sixteen in two months! We wouldn’t even be talking about this if he were a girl! I’ve been going to parties and you’ve all been assuming I was making out with half the girls in my class and you never said anything! And now, because he’s a guy, suddenly I’m too young? How’s that for double standards?” “Jared…” “No. You can’t tell me who to date or who to fall in love with. You can’t do that.” His mom sighed and closed her eyes for a moment before nodding. “Okay. I’m not saying you’re right but… you’re not wrong either. It feels different because it’s a boy. I’m more afraid that he might hurt you.” “Mom, have you seen me? I’m a freaking giant! And even if I weren’t… he would never do that. He’s not like that.” “So you keep saying but how can we know if you’re right?” She stroke his hair. “I remember what it was like with my first love. As wonderful as I thought he was he turned out to be a total jerk.” “Well, Jensen isn’t,” Jared said stubbornly. “Well, maybe not. I think…” She took a deep breath and then fixed her gaze on him. “We should meet him. You can invite him over here and we can get to know him. And then maybe his parents.” She hesitated. “They know he’s… like you, right?” Jared rolled his eyes. “Gay. Yes, they know.” “Alright. You have to understand we’re just worried about you. It’s not unreasonable for us to want to know what kind of people you’re getting involved with.” Jared swallowed, he wasn’t sure what he was allowed to say, but finally decided it was better his parents knew where Jensen was coming from. “His dad, he threw them out, mom. Because of Jen. And it was… He’s gone through a lot and I don’t want you and dad to jump on him and treat him like… like he’s a bad guy. Like he’s a pedophile or something. Because he’s not! He’s the nicest guy in the world. He’d never hurt me.” “Honey, I’m sure he is and I’m sorry about his dad. But you know better than to think we’d treat him like that.” “Do I?” Jared asked. “Did you hear dad? And I’m his son! How’s he gonna treat Jensen who he doesn’t even know?” His mother sighed. “I’ll talk to him. He just needs a little time, sweetie. You know he loves you, this just really threw him.” Jared shook his head, mouth set in a stubborn thin line. “I’m not letting dad near Jensen until I’m sure he’ll be nice to him. He’s… fragile.” A smile tugged at his mother’s lips. “Fragile?” Jared rolled his eyes. “Not in a girly gay way! He’s just… shy. And he’s had bad experience with people treating him like he’s worthless because he’s like freakishly pretty.” “So he’s handsome then?” she said innocently. “Mom!” Jared blushed but he couldn’t fight his smile either. “Well, is he?” “Uh, duh. But he’s also kind and sweet and funny and…” He cut himself off when he realized he sounded like a thirteen year old girl. “He’s just really nice.” “You really are in love,” his mother said softly and stroked his hair. “You think he feels the same way?” “I hope so. I know he likes me. A lot. And he isn’t taking advantage of me, mom. If anything I’m the one who-.” He stopped abruptly. “I mean… Uh…” She laughed. “It’s alright. I really don’t want to know.” She stood up and walked to the door but at the last minute turned around and reached out for him. “Come here.” Jared was out of bed and in her arms before the words left her mouth. He hugged her tight, feeling small and safe in her arms even if he’d been towering over her for over two years now. His shoulders started shaking and he buried his face in her neck, breathing in the sweet scent of her. “I never meant to hurt you,” he hiccupped and she hugged him tighter, shaking her head. “I know. I know, honey.” All the previous anger and bravado melted away and he clung to her in desperation. “Please don’t let dad kick me out. Please, mom. Please. Mom, he hates me. How can daddy hate me?” “Oh Jared.” She started crying too, holding him so tight he could hardly breathe. “He doesn’t hate you. No one hates you. We all love you. We all love you so much. It will be alright, I promise you. Everything will be fine.” He didn’t believe her. All he could see was the hurt and sadness in Jensen’s eyes when he talked about his own dad. He hadn’t told Jared much about how it went down but the implications were still enough that he could figure out it hadn’t been pretty and somehow he knew Jensen’s dad’s reaction hadn’t been limited to words. And the thought of his own father hating him that much that he hit him or even disowned him, it made him feel like he wanted to die. “I’ll talk to him. He’ll come around,” his mother said as she finally pulled away, wiping at the tears on her face. “Maybe you should stay in here for a while. I’ll bring you up some food.” “I’m not hungry.” She patted his cheek. “Well, I’ll bring you some anyway. You just rest, honey, ok?” He nodded, waiting until she closed the door behind her before crawling back under the covers and crying quietly into his pillow until he fell asleep.   The weekend went by in a dark daze. He kept wanting to call Jensen but chickened out every time, especially since their phone was old and had a cord and it meant he had to sit in the living room where everyone could hear him. Since he’d had a cell phone for years it had never bothered him before but now he felt like he’d stepped back to the seventies or something. He contemplated asking Ben to lend him his cell but his brother had hardly been seen since the showdown, obviously wary of the tense atmosphere in the house. He probably could have asked his mom but it felt weird and he didn’t want to admit to having lost his own. He’d hardly left his room at all, only for bathroom breaks and to steal food from the fridge. His mom looked in on him every now and then but so far she wasn’t making any progress with his dad and as more time went by Jared became more and more depressed. He pondered sneaking out, maybe climbing down from the window or something, but in the end it was just easier to stay in bed and feel miserable. He was just lying in bed late Sunday night, thinking about packing and wondering how much of his stuff he could get into a duffel bag when there was a knock on the door. Expecting his mother he called out for her to come in but froze when his dad entered the room and closed the door behind him. “We need to talk, Jared,” he said but he didn’t seem angry anymore, just very tired and old in a way that Jared had never noticed before. “Ok,” Jared said warily and sat up on the bed. He wasn’t sure he was ready to face this without his mother near to soften the blow but it didn’t look like he’d have any choice. His dad didn’t sit down on the bed like his mother used to do but stood awkward with his back against the door for a moment before walking over to the window, gazing out for a while before he started talking in a voice so low Jared could hardly hear him. “What I said… I’m sorry. It wasn’t right.” He picked a small Star Wars figurine up from the windowsill and then put it down again, seeming unsure what to do with his hands. “You are my son,” he continued after a while, “and I love you very much, even if you’re…” He swallowed. “Different. Nothing can change that.” Jared’s lower lip started trembling and he bit down on it, needing to look strong and grown-up, but he didn’t say anything, not really knowing what he could say. “Your mother has been talking to me. Ben too. Seems they think I’m being an ass and I think… I think they might be right.” He met Jared’s eyes in the reflection of the window but when Jared still didn’t say anything he cleared his throat and continued, voice more steady now. “I still think you’re too young to know what you’re doing, but you’re right, you’re not a child anymore. And if… if this is what you want then I guess I’ll just have to accept that.” He finally turned to face Jared and he was surprised to see tears in his dad’s eyes. He couldn’t remember ever seeing him cry before and it was more shocking than the turn-around of his opinion. “I just want what’s best for you. I just… I don’t know what to do here, Jared, you got to help me out.” Jared swallowed the lump in his throat and slowly got up from the bed, straightening up until he was standing in front of his father, showing his full height in an effort to seem more grown up. “I know you think I’m too young but I’m not, dad. I know what I’m doing. This is what I am and nothing’s gonna change that.” His dad nodded but he still looked unconvinced as if he was waiting for Jared to suddenly change his mind and produce a hidden girlfriend from under his bed. It wasn’t that Jared couldn’t understand his dad’s denial. His parents didn’t know any gay people, had no idea what they were like except from what they’d seen on TV and in movies which was infuriating because the stereotypes were so far from himself and Jensen. Fear of the unknown, that’s what this was and even if he dreaded it he could only think of one way to show his parents what Jensen was really like. “The boy you saw me with. His name is Jensen. He’s Cody’s brother.” At his dad’s alarmed look he couldn’t help smiling. “But don’t worry, they’re nothing alike.” “I sure hope not. I think one of those would be enough for one family.” For a moment Jared wasn’t sure what he meant, one menace or one gay son, but then his father added, “Ben is more than enough for us to handle. I really don’t know how the two of you can be so different.” “From what I’ve heard I take after mom and he takes after you,” Jared pointed out and his dad smiled and shrugged, well aware of all the stories their grandmother had told them of his wilder days. “But Jensen, he’s a good guy, dad. He’s kind and bright and hey, he gets good grades, much better than mine.” “Well, that wouldn’t be hard,” his dad pointed out, smiling slightly. “Haha. Funny. Will you just… meet him? I know that once you get to know him you’ll see how good he is.” His dad pursed his lips and for a while Jared was terrified he’d refuse. That he’d tell him he couldn’t see Jensen again. “Ok, sure. That sounds like a good idea. We should get to know him.” His dad nodded. “Tomorrow night.” Jared’s eyes widened. “Tomorrow?” “Jared, until I meet him I can’t give this relationship my blessing. So if you want this to work…” “Tomorrow it is,” Jared said quickly. He just hoped Jensen wouldn’t run screaming once he told him.   Monday morning he listened for his parents leaving for work and then tiptoed down the stairs. He gulped down some orange juice straight from the bottle and grabbed some toast before slipping on his sneakers and going outside. The sun was already warming the morning air and he drew in a deep breath for what seemed like the first time in three days. Jensen would hardly be up already but Jared didn’t want to wait. Couldn’t. He swung on to his bike and rode it as fast as he could, arriving at Jensen’s doorstep within five minutes. As he leaned the bike up against the porch he listened for any sound inside. Nothing. Everything was completely quiet and Jeff’s truck was missing from the driveway. Which meant he was probably at work, as well as Jensen’s mom and no one would be in except Jensen and Cody. For a moment he contemplated going to the door and ringing the bell but he really didn’t want to risk meeting Cody. The ladder it would be then. He jogged to the side of the house and looked up at Jensen’s window. It was cracked open and he sent a quick thank you to whoever was watching over him. Getting the ladder from the ground he raised it up against the house and then started his ascent. When he reached the top he was as before just able to peek over the edge of the windowsill. Jensen was lying in bed on his stomach, one arm dangling over the edge and his hair standing up in all directions. It was the most beautiful sight Jared had ever seen. “Jensen!” he hissed as loud as he dared but there was no reaction. Damn. “Jensen, wake up!” Jensen stirred but only to turn his head and let loose a loud snore. It would have been adorable if Jared wasn’t feeling so frustrated. “Jensen, c’mon! Wake up! You gotta wake up. Please!” His voice had been rising without him noticing until he was shouting in a cracked voice “Jen, please! I need you to wake up. JEN!” Jensen shot up in the bed, looking around in confusion. “Jared?” he mumbled sleepily and Jared stuck his hand through the crack, waving it frantically. “I’m here!” “Jesus, Jare!” Jensen jumped out of bed and over to the window. “Why are you…? Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” “I need to talk to you,” Jared said shakily. “I need… I need you.” “I’ll come down and let you in. Be careful. Don’t fall down!” Jared sniffled and carefully made his way down the ladder then hurried to the front door. Jensen was already there, standing sleepy and confused in his underwear, squinting slightly. “Come on in.” He pulled Jared by the arm into the house and then up the stairs to his room, coaxing him in a low voice. “It’s alright, it’s all gonna be fine. C’mon, Jare, calm down.” As soon as the door was closed behind them Jared slung his arms around Jensen’s neck and held on to him for dare life. He knew he was behaving like a baby but after the hellish weekend he’d just had he thought he was entitled. “Come on, Jare. Tell me what’s wrong. What happened?” “They saw us,” he hiccupped and Jensen stiffened in his arms. “When you kissed me in the truck.” “Oh.” “And my dad, he got so mad and I thought he was gonna kick me out and I lost my phone so I couldn’t call you and I didn’t know what to do and you were away and…” “Jared, slow down. Breathe. And sit down before you crush me.” Jared stumbled down onto the bed, hiding his head in his hands. “I never thought he’d be like that. I thought he would love me no matter what. But he was so angry. And mean!” Jensen slipped an arm over his shoulder and pulled him into a tight hug. “Yeah,” he sighed, knowing exactly where Jared was coming from. “I told them you’re the most awesome person I’ve ever met and that I loved you and he said, he said he could have you arrested.” Jensen went still beside him and then slowly pulled his arm away. “What?” “But he can’t because we haven’t done anything like that.” Jared wrapped his arms around Jensen’s waist, pulling him close again. “And I don’t care what they say, I am old enough. I’m not a little kid. And I know what I am and what I want.” “He really said that?” Jensen said dazedly. “He wants to have me arrested?” “Yes, but then he came to me last night and we talked and now he wants to meet you. And I think that’s good. That’s good, right?” “Maybe.” Jensen swallowed. He didn’t look convinced, in fact he looked half- scared. “He said, he said that maybe he was wrong. But he wants to talk to you, see what you are like and I just… Please? Can you please do that for me? Because he says I can’t be with you if he doesn’t know you and I know he’s being a jerk but I can’t lose you, Jen!” Jensen straightened up and gently pried Jared’s arms away from his waist. “Jare, calm down. Of course I’ll talk to him.” “You will?” “Yeah, sure. If that’s what it takes. Yeah.” He smiled even if he looked anything but sure and once again Jared threw himself at him, kissing him hard as he pulled him into a tight hug. “I was so miserable. And I couldn’t reach you.” Jensen hugged him back, rubbing his back soothingly “I’m sorry. But hey, I found your phone. You left it in the truck. And your mom’s blankets.” “I forgot those,” Jared sniffled. “I figured.” Jensen grinned and pushed Jared down on the bed. “Now how about I’ll make it up to you, leaving you alone all weekend?” “ Ok.” Jared smiled up at him, feeling tremendously relieved even if getting Jensen to agree only took care of a small part of his worries.   He was all jittery as he checked his watch every three seconds, waiting for it to turn eight. His mother had baked cinnamon rolls and the smell for once didn’t make him feel hungry but nauseated. The house was radiating with tension and it felt as though if he’d lit a match the whole place would explode. The clock showed one minute past eight when the doorbell rang and Jared jumped up from the couch and hurried to the front door. Jensen was standing outside, dressed in dark slacks and a black shirt, glasses perched on his nose. Jared blinked at him. Wow. “I didn’t know you wore glasses,” he said stupidly and Jensen blushed. “I usually wear contacts,” he said awkwardly. “I just figured they might make me look, I don’t know, more harmless?” “They make you look fucking hot,” Jared said softly and leaned down for a quick stolen kiss, making Jensen blush even further. “Come on in.” He waited as Jensen kicked off his shoes and then grabbed his hand, leading him into the living room. Maybe he was being provocative but he didn’t care. If Jensen had been a girl he’d done the same thing. Why should he have to hide how much he cared just because Jensen was a guy? His parents stood up and greeted Jensen with a handshake. He smiled and addressed them politely, accepting the seat on the couch that they offered him and giving Jared a calm smile when he sat down beside him, once again reaching for his hand. “Jared, it’s alright.” He gave the Padalecki’s a patient smile. “I think your son is a bit worried.” “Is there something he should be worrying about?” Jared’s dad asked, making Jared cringe but Jensen only shook his head calmly. “Not from my side, no. I care very much for Jared and I would never hurt him.” Jared’s dad pursed his lips while his mom gave them both a nervous smile. She seemed quite enthralled by Jensen though, watching him with a dazed look as if she’d been expecting Jared to bring home some kind of leather-clad biker guy with a ZZ Top beard. “Now, Jensen. It’s Jensen, isn’t it?” she said. “Such an unusual name. Why don’t you tell us a little about yourself?” Jared sat red-faced and sweating while Jensen calmly told them where he was born and raised, about the origin of his name (some Danish relatives, Jared didn’t really pay attention to the details) what his parents did and where he was heading after high school. “Well, I’ve got offered a full ride to a few places but I haven’t decided yet. I thought I might even take a year off to earn me some money first. Those scholarships only go so far and I’m in no hurry. I’ve talked it over with the people at Stanford and seems they're willing to let it wait so I guess that’s where I’ll go eventually.” He gave Jared a smile and he breathed out in relief, only now realizing how worried he had been that Jensen might be going away in only a couple of months. And even if Stanford was a long way away he was sure they’d be able to work it out somehow. They talked for a while longer and then Jared’s dad cleared his throat and gave Jensen a pointed look. “You do realize that Jared is only fifteen years old and as such it is illegal to have… sexual relations with him.” “Dad!” Jared hissed mortified but Jensen squeezed his hand and kept his eyes on his dad. “I know and believe me, I have no intentions of leading your son astray.” “No, I’m pretty sure he can do that all by himself,” Jared’s dad said bluntly. “Now, I’m not going to tell you not to see each other because I can see how futile that would be but I want you to promise me that you won’t… go all the way until Jared is at least sixteen.” “What!” said Jared just as Jensen firmly replied, “You have my word, sir.” “Hey, don’t I get any say in this?” “Jared, it’s this or nothing. If you two can be together those two months without breaking that rule then you would have proved not just to me and your mother, but to yourself as well, that this is something you think is worth waiting for.” “I have absolutely no problem with that,” Jensen said hurriedly, “and I’m sure once Jared has had a moment to think it over he won’t either.” “That’s that then,” Jared’s dad said and stood up. “It was nice to meet you, Jensen. I have to say, you are not what I expected.” “You seem like a very nice young man, Jensen,” Jared’s mom agreed, “and I’m sure you’ll be a good influence on our Jared.” Jared sat on the couch staring at them. He felt like he was stuck in some kind of Spanish soap opera and really had no idea how to react. Slowly he got to his feet and followed Jensen to the door. He wanted to ask him what was going to happen now but he was painfully aware of his parents watching them from the hall way. “I’ll see you tomorrow then?” he asked quietly and Jensen smiled. “Yeah, Jare. Don’t worry. Everything is fine. We’re fine. It’s going to be okay.” “How can you be so calm?” Jared whispered. “I was peeing my pants and you were like steel. How do you do that?” Jensen grinned. “I pictured them in their underwear,” he whispered back before planting a chaste kiss on Jared’s cheek and disappearing out the door. Jared turned around and faced his parents. They were watching him, his mother smiling softly and his father looking rather uncomfortable. “So?” he asked sarcastically. “Does he get the stamp of approval?” His mother laughed. “Honey, you really weren’t kidding. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone as likeable. And handsome.” “Hey!” his dad said indignantly and she grinned up at him. “Except for my men, of course.” “Hmph.” Jared’s dad pursed his lips. “I’ve got to admit he was a pleasant surprise. Well spoken and polite and obviously bright.” “I told you,” Jared said but he was smiling too, feeling so relieved. “So we’re good? I can still see him?” “Yes. But remember…” “Yeah, yeah. I know. God, I can’t believe I had to listen to you two negotiate about my cherry.” “Jared!” “What?”   “So, we’re really gonna do this?” Jared asked, butterflies in his stomach. Jensen smiled softly and pulled him in for a kiss that left him breathless and aching in his pants. “Yeah. We are.” They gazed at each other for a long time. Jared wasn’t sure what Jensen was thinking about but by the heated look in his eyes it would be safe to guess it was somewhere along the same lines as his own thoughts. “I’ll… I’ll see you tonight then,” he finally stuttered and Jensen nodded, squeezing his thigh lightly before letting him go. Jared climbed out of the truck and gave Jensen a reassuring smile when he raised his eyebrow in question. He watched the car pull away from the curb and disappear at the end of the street, heart hammering in his chest. They were really gonna do it. They were finally going to have sex. Real sex, not the Clinton kind. Not that he had anything against blowjobs; it was just that the thought of Jensen underneath him, of pressing into that hot tight body… It was enough to make him sport an erection that really had no place in the middle of the street in broad daylight. Despite Jensen’s quips of Jared popping his cherry he had always kind of imagined that it would be the other way around. Maybe because Jensen was older it seemed like it should be that way. But Jensen had made it clear he wanted Jared to be on top their first time and Jared really had no words to describe how that made him feel. He knew it had a lot to do with Jensen’s lingering guilt about Jared’s age even now when he was finally sixteen and had been for over a week. That if they did it this way then at least Jared would be the one in charge. Didn’t matter that Jared told him over and over again it was all bullshit. That he wasn’t forcing him in any way, wasn’t taking advantage of him like he was a helpless kid. Nothing like that. But Jensen could be damn stubborn when he wanted to and this was something there was no changing his mind about. Not that Jared really minded. Sure he loved when Jensen put his fingers in there, rubbing over that magic spot until Jared thought he’d pass out from the sheer goodness of the whole thing. But if anything he loved even more watching Jensen as he did the same to him. The way he would lose control, gasping for breath and slamming his palms down on the bed or grass or wherever they happened to be, pushing himself down on Jared’s fingers as if he couldn’t get enough of them. He’d make these sounds that went straight to Jared’s groin, whimpering and moaning and chanting Jared’s name as if there was nothing else in the whole world than him. If a couple of fingers did that to him, how would he be when Jared pushed his cock inside? God, his cock was gonna be inside Jensen’s ass! Like really, inside. Pushing into that tight heat, sliding in and out of Jensen’s body as he clenched around him, the way he used to do to Jared’s fingers. Just the thought was overwhelming. He better use the time he had to calm down and compose himself or it would all be over to soon. He needed to figure out the best way to do this. He needed… to go online and watch some gay porn. Half an hour later he was anything but calmed down and the nervousness he’d felt earlier was nothing compared to what he was feeling now. For one thing the guys in those videos? They grunted a lot. And it didn’t always sound like it was the good kind of grunting. And not to be bigheaded or anything but those guys? Didn’t have half as big a cock as he had. If anything his cock had grown the last couple of months and he was having a hard time picturing it even fitting into Jensen. Like trying to squeeze a salami into a… a… very, very tight asshole! God, he’d never roll his eyes at his mother again when she started talking about how difficult it had been to give birth to eleven pounds of Jared Tristan Padalecki because this sounded very much like the same thing. After rewriting the few notes he had made (the first draft got stained, twice) he looked over the list of points he had made. 1. Lots of kisses and making out first 2. Position? 3. Preparation is very important 4. Lube! Lots and lots! 5. Fingers first. Stretch. 6. Condom! 7. Push in very slowly and not speed up until he’s ready 8. Try and hit the right spot 9. Make it good! He looked over the list, feeling even more overwhelmed than before. Usually when they were doing stuff, whether blowjobs or just jerking each other off, his brain kinda melted away and all he could think of was how good it was and try not to come too soon. So how was he supposed to remember all of this? And he only had… He checked the clock and jumped out of bed. Just an hour? And he hadn’t even showered yet! Twenty minutes later he was clean and dressed and trying not to freak out. He could do this, right? He had to. He just needed to be calm and cool and remember everything on the li… Crap. He flipped open his phone and pushed 3 on speed dial. The phone rang three times and then it was picked up, Jensen on the other end. “Hi, hey.” “Hey, Jared.” Jensen sounded happy, excited even and it calmed Jared down some. “You on your way?” “Yeah, yeah, soon. I was just wondering, do you have…I mean… Do we need… stuff?” “Stuff?” Jensen asked, sounding confused. Jared blushed even though there was no one watching him. “Yeah, you know. For the… Don’t we need stuff?” “Jared, you’re not making any sense.” “You know… stuff stuff!” There was silence and then Jensen snorted on the other end. “Are you talking about condoms?” “Uhm… Yeah. And you know, the other stuff.” “Lubrication.” He was definitely laughing now even if it sounded as if he was trying to hold it back. “Well, you know, Jared, I thought you’d bring that. Seeing as you’re the one who’s gonna use the… stuff.” “Me?” “Is that a problem? Because we can always reschedule…” His eyes widened. “No! Not a problem. Right. I’ll get right on that.” “You do that,” Jensen chuckled. “Just hurry up,”he added and then the line went dead, leaving Jared staring at the phone in his hand. Like every other teenage boy he kept a condom in his wallet but it had been there for three years now and somehow he doubted that was a good thing. And what if they wanted to do it more than once? And slick? He looked at the bottle of lotion by his bed and cringed. He kinda doubted Jensen wanted his ass to smell like lavender. So… buying stuff. He could do that. Sure, no problem. He’d stop by the drugstore on his way to Jensen’s and just… buy it. That’s what you did when you were in a relationship, you made sure everything was safe and good and that included… stuff. Well, at least he didn’t have to worry about buying tampons like his mom made his dad do. Because that would be awkward. Ten minutes later he parked his bike outside the small and only drugstore in town, ten minutes before it closed. Just play it cool, that was the way to go. Cool and confident and… He walked inside the store and came face to face with the seventy year old clerk. “What can I do you for, young man?” the man said tiredly, obviously looking forward to closing up. “Erm… I need to buy…” Just then the bell above the door rang and an old lady who had to be at least eighty walked in, cane in hand. She stalked right up to the counter, stopping by Jared’s elbow and gave him an impatient glare. “Yes?” the clerk said calmly and Jared swallowed. “Uh… I was gonna buy…” The old lady tapped her watch and gave him a pointed stare. “Uh… cough medicine!” He coughed pitifully into his hand, earning him another glare from the old witch and she took a step back in disgust. “Bad cough. Yes.” The clerk frowned but went into the back and came out with a bottle of cough syrup. He rang up the purchase while Jared stood sweating and he paid in a hurry before running out, blushing so hard he was sure he stood out like a beacon. Crap! Crap, crap, crap! Goddammit to hell! He glanced into the store but the old lady seemed to have decided to take up residence by the counter, talking in a hoarse voice about “youth today” and “no respect”. He checked his watch. The store would close in another five minutes, he was supposed to be at Jensen’s place in less than ten and the wicked old witch wasn’t moving. At all. What the hell was he supposed to do? Just then he heard a familiar laughter and his head snapped up. Across the street Ben was whistling at some girls at least four years his senior, making lewd hand gestures and flicking his tongue at them. It was embarrassing. Ben really had no shame, at all. Ben had no shame… Ben had no shame! “Ben!” Jared yelled as he jogged across the street. “Hey, bro. Wanna earn twenty bucks?” Ben eyed him suspiciously. “Maybe. What you need?” Jared draped one arm conspiringly across Ben’s shoulders. “See that store? I need you to go in and ask for KY Jelly and some Trojans, ok?” Ben’s eyes lit up and he laughed in delight. “Dude! You’re gonna fuck Jensen? Oh this is great! Fucking eh, man!” “Shut up! Just go in there and buy it, ok, and I’ll give you twenty bucks.” Ben shook his head. “Fifty.” “Are you insane? I’m not gonna…” At Ben’s pointed look he gritted his teeth. “Fine. Fifty. Just… hurry up. They’re about to close.” “Relax, dude. I got it under control.” “Wait! I think I need… big ones?” He cringed. Ben rolled his eyes. “Of course you do. I’m not blind.” He walked confidently across the street and disappeared into the store. After a moment’s hesitation Jared followed and stood by the door, listening. “Well, hello there, son. What can I help you with?” “I need rubbers. You got any?” Ben asked cheerfully. The clerk faltered and when Jared glanced inside he saw the old lady was staring at Ben with wide eyes, clutching at her chest. “Rubbers?” the man stammered. “You know, for my dick. I have a girlfriend now so I need to get me some stuff, if you know what I mean.” He winked at the old lady who sucked in her breath in horror. The clerk glared at him. “Aren’t you a bit young for that sort of thing?” “Nah, I’m small for my age. But don’t worry, she’s all legal. I kinda like them older. More experienced, right?” He elbowed the old witch and Jared was starting to worry that she was going to drop down dead from lack of air the way she was gasping. “Well, I’ve never!” she said, outrageous, and Ben looked at her in surprise. “Really? Never? Huh.” He gave her an incredulous look before turning back to the clerk. “Anyway, yeah. Wanna make her feel good. You got any of those ribbed ones? Or oh, with flavour! After all, if I’m gonna pop her cherry we might as well make it taste like one!” He leered. “Young man, I don’t know where you get your ideas! We have the regular kind and that’s all.” “No flavours or warts or anything?” Ben sighed. “Well, as long as they’re big enough. I’ve been told I’m quite the stallion. Give me a big box of Trojan Magnum.” “A box?” the clerk gasped. “There are ten dozen in one box!” “Well, we’ve got the whole weekend! Which reminds me, we’ll probably need some lube. Don’t want her drying up on me. KY, that’s the thing, right?” The clerk gritted his teeth and slammed a tube of KY and two packs of condoms on the counter. “You can get three or twelve, that’s all.” “Only twelve?” Ben sighed. “Oh alright then. But if we run out I’m blaming you.” He paid for his purchases and whistled happily as he left the store, the clerk and the now ashen-faced old lady staring after him. “Here you go, bro,” Ben said and tossed the bag at Jared as soon as he came around the corner. “Knock yourself out. Or him. Whatever. Where’s my money?” Jared pulled out the bill and shoved it at Ben. “Now get out of here before the ambulance arrives.” Ben frowned. “What ambulance?” “For the old lady you just gave a heart attack.” Ben grinned. “Did you see her face? Priceless, man.” “Yeah, yeah, alright. Now go. And Ben? Don’t tell mom or dad.” “Dude, what you take me for?” Jared shook his head in amusement and got on his bike, plastic bag dangling from his hand. He had a date with Jensen’s ass and he had no intention of being late. There was no car in the driveway when he got to Jensen’s house and he could hardly contain his excitement. It would be just him and Jensen and it was going to be absolutely perfect! He rang the bell, flipped up the collar of his jacket and when the door opened he drawled sexily, “Hey baby, I’m here to make your night complete.” “Well, that’s sweet but I don’t swing that way,” said Jeff and grinned. “But you can come in anyway.” “Uh, hi!” Jared squeaked. “Sorry about that. I thought… Jensen home?” “He’s upstairs,” Jeff replied, barely containing his laughter. Jared ran up the stairs, knocking twice on Jensen’s door before opening the door. Jensen was lying on the bed, reading and he barely looked up when Jared stepped inside. “Oh, hi.” “Hi.” Jared shifted awkwardly from one foot to the other. “So… your parents are home.” “Yeah.” Jensen frowned at him. “Is that a problem?” “Problem? No, no problem. I just thought…” He swallowed. Had he misunderstood the whole thing? “They’re not going out?” Jensen shrugged. “Nah, my mom is tired. They asked if we could take Cody to see a movie. You don’t mind, do you?” Jared hid the bag behind his back. “No. No, no. I don’t mind,” he choked out, trying desperately to hide his disappointment. He looked up to find Jensen grinning at him, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “What?” “Dude, I’m kidding. They’re leaving in about five minutes.” He shook his head and laughed. “You should have seen the look on your face, man!” Jared stared at him. “Oh, you are so dead!” He tackled Jensen on the bed, tickling him until he was gasping for breath and there were tears running from his eyes. “You give up? Say I win!” “I win!” Jensen laughed. “Jackass. Not you, me! Say I win!” “Ok, ok, you win. You are the ruler of the universe, my master and commander! I bow to your superior strength!” “Now that’s more like it.” There was a knock on the door and they sprang apart, flushed and panting. Jeff stuck his head inside and grinned widely at them. “We’re going now. You boys behave.” “Yes, sir!” they replied in unison and he shook his head at them before closing the door again. They collapsed on the bed, staring up at the ceiling as they tried to get their breathing back to normal. “So…” Jared finally said. “Are we gonna… you know, do it?” Jensen turned his head to look at him. “Are you having second thoughts? Because we don’t have to.” Jared turned on his side and propped up on one elbow, gazing down at Jensen with what he hoped looked like concern in his eyes and not the panic he was actually feeling. “Are you having second thoughts?” “No.” Jensen shook his head, eyes determined. “No, I want this.” “Ok, then.” He leaned over and kissed Jensen softly on the lips. Despite Jensen’s words Jared could feel the tension vibrating throughout his whole body, and for some reason that calmed his own nerves considerably. He might not know what he was doing but neither did Jensen and they would just have to learn together. “Let’s just take it slowly,” he said and nibbled at Jensen’s lips. “We can just lie here and make out for a while. I like making out.” “So I’ve noticed,” Jensen said with a smile. “You’re getting pretty good at it too.” “Getting?” Jared repeated, faking insult. “Baby, I was born for this.” He noisily slobbered all over Jensen’s neck until he got pushed away with a loud ‘Ew!’ and Jensen choking with laughter. “That is so gross! You are utterly disgusting!” “Yes, but I’m cute!” “That you are.” They kissed again, licking and nibbling at each other’s mouths while their hands wandered. Jared’s nervousness was slowly fading as he got more and more turned on and by the time Jensen popped the button on his jeans and started to tug at his zipper he was hard as rock and panting shallowly. “That okay?” Jensen asked as if he hadn’t had his hands, and mouth, down there more than often, but this was different somehow. Jared nodded and lifted his hips to help ease his jeans and underwear down. He’d already rid Jensen off his t-shirt and now got to work on his jeans as he kicked his own off the bed. He felt oddly shy all of a sudden; the way Jensen was gazing at him, especially his cock, made him feel more self-conscious than he was used to. “Can we maybe… dim the lights?” he whispered and Jensen nodded. He grabbed a baseball that lay on his bedside table and threw it with obvious practice at the light switch. The main light clicked off, leaving them in the soft light of the bedside lamps and Jared breathed out in relief. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of the way he looked or that he didn’t want to drink in the sight of Jensen naked and gorgeous on the bed, it just had all seemed a bit too real in the harsh light and he didn’t care if it was girly or not, this was way more romantic. “You want me to suck you first?” Jensen asked huskily, already moving down, but Jared stopped him and pushed him on his back on the bed instead. “Let me,” he said. “I want you to be as relaxed as you can.” “I’m okay,” Jensen answered but he didn’t argue, just lay back on the pillows and closed his eyes. Jared took a moment to kiss him softly on the lips before licking his way down Jensen’s chest, loving the way he shivered underneath him. “You taste so good,” he said and Jensen laughed shakily. “Hope you’d already eaten. I know your appetite, man. I wouldn’t want you to accidentally bite something off.” “Don’t worry, I’m just gonna nibble,” Jared answered with a grin and scraped his teeth playfully over Jensen’s right nipple. “A little bit here and a little bit… there.” He chuckled as Jensen hitched his breath, flicking his tongue over the now reddening flesh before continuing his travel downward. By the time he reached Jensen’s hipbones he was squirming on the bed, the tickling of Jared’s tongue bringing out mixed sounds of gasps and giggles. Jared loved sucking Jensen’s cock. It wasn’t just the taste and the softness of the skin under his tongue but to feel the erection swell in his mouth, the thick vein pulsate against his lips, and if that wasn’t enough the sounds Jensen made were beyond anything he’d ever heard before. It made him wonder what Jensen would sound like once Jared got his cock inside him. If it was even close to what he was doing now he wasn’t sure he’d last more than a few seconds. He could feel that Jensen was close, the lifting of his balls making the skin wrinkle a telltale sign, so he reluctantly let him slide out of his mouth, ignoring Jensen’s feeble protests. “I want to try something,” he said breathlessly and nudged Jensen until he rolled over. Jared reached for a pillow and pushed it under Jensen’s hips, then spread his legs as far as he could, crawling up between them. He could feel Jensen tense, his thighs trembling, and he looked over his shoulder, uncertainty once again filling his eyes. “Are you…?” he asked and Jared leaned over to kiss him, first on the lips and then between his shoulder blades as Jensen let his head fall back down. “Not yet. Just relax.” He sat back on his hunches, wondering how he was going to do this and then decided to just go for it. Cupping Jensen’s cheeks in his hands he slid his thumbs down between and gently parted them. Then he leaned forward and licked a stripe up Jensen’s crack from the root of his balls and over the tight entrance. “God! What are you...?” Jensen gasped and bucked on the bed. Jared didn’t answer him, just let his tongue run back down until it stopped at Jensen’s entrance, where he licked experimentally, grinning when Jensen whined almost pitifully. Playing with Jensen’s body was kinda like playing an instrument, there were all kinds of beautiful sounds he could bring out just by the tip of his tongue. Talking of which… He made his tongue as hard as he could and then pushed inside. “Jesus Christ!” Jensen’s ass jumped pretty much right in Jared’s face, bumping his nose and pushing his tongue in even further. Obviously he was doing something right. Pulling Jensen’s cheeks even further apart he set to work. It wasn’t long until Jensen was humping the pillow and practically sobbing Jared’s name, begging him to please, please give him more. Jared pushed one finger in alongside his tongue and that made Jensen almost frantic, much more than he’d ever been when Jared used just his fingers and nothing more. Clearly tongue play was the way to go. Well, for preparation anyway. Jared’s own cock was almost painfully hard by now and he kept rubbing it against the bedspread, desperate for some friction. He was wondering when it would be appropriate to move on to the next stage when Jensen lifted his head and growled, “I swear if you don’t get that cock inside me I’m gonna kill you, Jared, so help me God.” Guess now was a good a time as any. He sat up and wiped his face on the back of his hand before reaching over for the small plastic bag he’d left on the bedside table. Jensen lay still, panting on the bed, watching him with hooded eyes as he fumbled with the tube of jelly and shook out a couple of condoms on the pillow. “Magnum?” he said with a smile and Jared could feel his face grow hot. “Well, yeah. I thought…” He swallowed. “You think they won’t fit?” “I’m sure they will,” Jensen said reassuringly and shifted on the bed. “How do you want me?” “I was thinking maybe like this while I prep you and then, when we… uh… do it, you can be on your back.” “Ok.” Jensen bit his lip. “Just… go easy.” Jared stilled. “If at any time you wanna stop, just tell me. I promise I won’t mind. Any time. If you think it’s too much or something, just let me know.” “I’m fine,” Jensen huffed but he did look nervous as hell and Jared wondered if maybe he should again offer to switch. He was gonna bottom eventually anyway, he might as well go first. But he’d been over this with Jensen many times and he very much doubted he’d changed his mind. Jensen’s chivalry was kinda hot in a ridiculous sort of way. “This isn’t some macho contest, Jen,” Jared said slowly. “I want you to tell me if you want to stop. You’re not doing me any favors by making me hurt you.” Jensen swallowed. “Ok, I promise. But I won’t. It will be good, I’m sure.” “I’ll make it as good as I can,” Jared assured him and leaned over to kiss him until he could feel the hard lines of Jensen’s mouth soften and he breathed out, his shoulders relaxing. Sitting up he popped the lid of the tube of jelly and squeezed out enough to coat two of his fingers. The jelly was cool and Jensen jumped when Jared touched him. “Sshh, it’s okay,” he said soothingly. “We’ve done this before and we didn’t even have proper slick then.” Jensen laughed shakily but breathed out, the dimples on his ass smoothing out as he relaxed. Jared pushed one finger gently inside, the way he’d learned the last couple of months, letting it ride in with the slickness of the lube and being careful not to scratch the delicate tissue with his fingernail. He prodded for a while, feeling Jensen’s tight hold slowly ease around his finger and not until he was confident Jensen was ready did he slide another finger in. This was familiar as well and after a while Jensen stopped resisting and started pushing back, his breathing shallow and labored. “Ok?” Jared asked, out of breath himself just by watching the way Jensen was reacting to him. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m good,” came the muffled reply. “You’re good, Jare.” “Ok.” He slowly pulled his fingers out, smiling when Jensen whimpered and tried to follow him, to push him back in. He squeezed out more lube, slicking up his ring finger as well. “Tell me if it’s too much,” he said as he pressed his fingers together as tight as he could before sliding back inside. It was a lot tighter this time and he stopped once he was past the first knuckle, feeling how Jensen tensed and then he stopped breathing. “Too much? Jen?” “Just… wait a minute.” “Ok.” He sat back, holding his hand absolutely still. Jensen clenched around him, gripping his fingers like a vice, and Jared stroke his thigh, mumbling soothing words about how good he was doing and how amazing it felt, touching him like this. After a while he felt Jensen ease the grip and then he nodded. “I’m okay,” he said, voice strangled. “I’m okay.” “You sure?” “Yeah. It’s weird but… It’s a good weird.” “Alright.” Jared gave him a few more moments to adjust and then pushed gently. There was only the slightest resistance and then he was sliding inside, fingers disappearing into Jensen’s body until his knuckles rested against the tailbone. “Oh God.” He froze. “Bad?” “No-o.” “Can I move?” “Yeah. Yeah, just… slowly.” Jared nodded and carefully moved his fingers, twisting them slightly before sliding them almost all the way out. “Like this?” “Ungh.” That was definitely a good grunt. He smiled then pushed his fingers back inside, the earlier resistance completely gone now. It was still impossibly tight but he didn’t seem to be hurting Jensen and that was all that mattered. He slid his fingers in and out a few times before pushing them all the way in and curling his fingertips. Jensen jerked on the bed, a half-strangled yelp escaping his lips and Jared froze again. “Did I hurt you?” Jensen shook his head. “No. Do it again.” Oh. Jared grinned. He curled his fingers again; rubbing the fingertips repeatedly over that magic spot he was by now sure God had given them just for this. And wasn’t that a slap in all those self-righteous homophobes’ face? Jensen was squirming by now, humping the pillow and mewling desperately, seeming unable to form any words. He was loosening up, even allowing a little bit of blood to circulate back into Jared’s by now no doubt bluish fingers. “You ready?” he finally asked hopefully and Jensen nodded frantically. “Yeah. Come on, Jare. Want you.” “Turn over.” He pulled his fingers out and helped Jensen turn over on his back, relieved to see he was fully hard and leaking. Those porn guys he’d been studying tended to go limp if they were hurting or if they weren’t into it and he’d been terrified that would happen. Jensen was gazing up at him with dark and hooded eyes, his lips slack and swollen from where he no doubt had been gnawing them, and a flush went all the way from his ears and down his chest. “Knees up,” Jared said hoarsely and hitched his breath when Jensen instantly complied. He fumbled for the condoms, dropping them twice before he managed to get his hold on one, and he bit into the foil with his teeth. It ripped open and he pulled the condom out, looking at it with trepidation. He really should have practiced beforehand. It was so thin and slippery and he cursed as he tried and utterly failed to roll it on. “How is anyone supposed to be able to do this?” he growled, finally pinching a hold of it with his fingernails and quickly jerking it on. He was just about to grin in triumph when there was a slick ripping sound and out poked the head of his cock. “Fuck!” Jensen sat up, laughter in his eyes. “Here, let me.” He pulled the ruined condom off, threw it aside and picked up a new one. He had it opened and rolled on within seconds. “How did you…? You’ve done this before?” Jared asked, feeling apprehensive. “Dude, some of us practice. Why do you think I didn’t have any left?” Jensen smirked at him and then lay back down, licking his lips. “Now give it to me, big boy.” Jared laughed nervously and looked down. Now his fingers weren’t inside anymore the entrance looked just as small as before, if maybe softer and slightly swollen. He felt it with his fingers, slipping them briefly inside just to make sure that yes, Jensen was still slick and as lose as he was before. Then he raised his head and held Jensen’s gaze as he moved forward and slowly pushed ins- A door slammed and they both froze. Voices could be heard down in the hall and then the unmistakable sound of someone ascending the stairs. “Oh shit!” Jensen scrambled to sit up, staring at the door in panic. “They are not supposed to be home! Why are they home?!” He fell out of bed and fumbled for his clothes. “Hurry!” It was a flurry of panicked movement as they each tried to sort out their clothes and get dressed. Jared gave up on finding his underwear, just slipped the jeans on and was pulling his t-shirt over his head as the knock came on the door. Jensen threw Jared his PSP and quickly swept the lube and condoms off the bedside table and under the bed before calling out in a rather breathless voice, “What?” Jared’s heart hammered in his chest, he was hot and flushed and, oh God, still achingly hard, but he tried as he could to look innocent when Jeff popped his head inside, an apologetic grin on his face. “Sorry, boys. We had to cut our evening short because your mother got a headache.” He looked them both over with a badly suppressed grin. “Everything alright?” “Everything’s fine, Mr. Morgan,” Jared said and threw him his most brilliant smile. “That’s good.” Jeff nodded. “Jared, how about you come downstairs for a moment so we can have a talk.” “Jeff!” Jensen hissed. “What? I just want to have a word with the boy. Don’t worry, I won’t steal him for too long. Jared?” Jared looked from Jeff to Jensen, but really he didn’t have much choice. “Sure. Yeah.” He gave Jensen a shrug and stood up, thankful that his erection had subsided somewhat. They left Jensen scowling in the room and headed downstairs and into the kitchen where Jeff opened the fridge and pulled out a beer for himself and a soda for Jared. He accepted it with a stiff smile, feeling increasingly nervous. What the hell did Jeff want to talk about? “So… Jared. It’s getting pretty serious between the two of you.” Jared swallowed the sip he’d just been taking and coughed awkwardly. “Yes?” Jeff smiled and patted his back amiably. “Now there’s no need to be worried. I like you, Jared. You’re a great change from the assholes Jensen’s been dating before. Don’t know what’s up with that boy, he seems to attract the worst kind of guys. Until now.” Jared blushed. “Uh… thank you.” Jeff smiled and drank from his beer, eyes never leaving Jared. Jared tried to look as calm as he could but those piercing eyes were very unsettling. “Now I can see how much you care about him,” Jeff continued, “and how much he cares about you and I know how it is with kids your age. It’s all sex on the brain.” Jared choked on the soda, drops of it spurting out of his mouth and dribbling down his chin. Oh God. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, feeling himself blush ten shades of red. “Mr. Morgan, I assure you…” “No, no. Don’t even try. Hell, I remember how it was. And I’m not gonna tell you you shouldn’t. Just… be safe, Jared. Use protection and be careful and we shouldn’t have a problem.” Jared stared at him. “Uh… okay. I mean, of course,” he hurried to add. “I’m very responsible and Jensen, he’s like a boy scout so you don’t need to worry at all. I mean, if we were doing anything like that which…” “Jeff, are you done terrorizing him?” said Jensen’s voice from the doorway and Jared jumped. He gave Jensen a grateful look, thanking him over and over in his head for saving him from further humiliating himself. “I’m not terrorizing him,” Jeff was saying but there was laughter in his voice and when Jensen only gave him a pointed look he laughed out loud and stood up, thumping Jared on the shoulder. “It was nice talking to you,” he said. “And remember what I said.” “Yes, sir. Of course,” Jared stammered and Jensen gave him an odd look. “You okay?” he asked as soon as Jeff had left the kitchen. “He wasn’t mean to you or anything?” “No. Nothing like that. He just wanted to… talk.” Jensen still looked suspicious but Jared gave him a smile and after a while he visibly relaxed and smiled back. “I should probably get going,” Jared said reluctantly and stood up. Jensen looked disappointed but he nodded and together they walked to the door. Well, Jensen walked. Jared more… wobbled. “Are you okay? You’re walking kinda funny,” Jensen asked with a frown. “Well, yeah.” Jared blushed and discreetly tried to adjust himself in his pants before lowering his voice and whispering, “I forgot to take the condom off.” Jensen’s eyes widened and then he burst out laughing, pressing his face into Jared’s shoulder to muffle the almost high-pitched sounds coming from his throat as he wheezed for air. “Oh God!” “It’s not funny! It’s all slippery and wet and keeps sliding down.” Jensen gazed up at him, eyes crinkling with amusement and his breath still hitching slightly. Then he got a sly look on his face and before Jared realized what he was doing Jensen had slipped his hand down the front of his pants. After some maneuvering and rather unnecessary groping he came up with the wet condom in his hand and slipped it casually into his own pocket. “Now is that better?” “Unghu?” Jared moaned. He was already getting hard again and he had to ride his bike home! “That’s just mean,” he hissed. “What?” Jensen blinked innocently. “You better get home now, Jared, before your mom starts worrying about you.” “Evil,” Jared mumbled and slipped on his sneakers. “Evil, evil boyfriend.” “Hey.” He turned to Jensen with a scowl and got a set of wet lips, pressed against his and all his annoyance melted away. He pulled Jensen in closer and kissed him until he had to come up for air, the hard on in Jensen’s pants now matching his own. “You wanna go see a movie tomorrow?” he asked rather breathlessly. “Since it’s our anniversary and all?” Jensen nodded, the pink in his cheeks reaching from the tips of his ears and down below the collar of his t-shirt. “Yeah. That… That would be nice.” “We can sit in the back and make out and after we could borrow Jeff’s truck maybe and have a moonlight date at the lake.” He kissed Jensen hard. “Bring the stuff and I’ll finish what we started,” he added, reaching down to cup the now obvious bulge in Jensen’s pants. Jensen sucked in his breath. “Yeah, yeah. That sounds good.” “Ok, it’s a date then.” Jared gave him a smile and then slipped out the door, leaving Jensen hard and panting in the hallway. Hah! Jensen wasn’t the only one who knew how to cocktease. Now how to ride the bike home without coming in his pants…   He still could hardly believe they’d been together two months. Sometimes he even had a hard time believing he was dating Jensen in the first place. That Jensen, the hottest and awesomest guy to ever walk the planet, was dating him, Jared, superdork and all around goofy klutz. It was quite the miracle. He wanted to give Jensen something to mark the day but he had no idea what to give a guy that wouldn’t come of as girly. Not flowers or chocolate or anything like that. Jewelry sounded rather stupid too but he still kinda wanted Jensen to have something he could carry around on him always. He spent the next day browsing the shops, trying to find anything that might be appropriate, but coming up empty handed. He was just about to give up when he came upon a small stand that was selling homemade jewelry, earrings and necklaces and bracelets. Well, earrings were obviously out and even if a couple of the necklaces caught his eye he wasn’t sure Jensen would like them. He picked up a couple of bracelets instead. They were made of leather with a few beads tastefully placed. They didn’t look girly at all, in fact they looked very manly and kinda cool. He contemplated getting them a matching pair but it felt too mushy so in the end he just bought one, trying it on his own wrist before slipping it into his pocket with a smile. They had agreed to meet outside the theater and at a quarter to eight Jared stood awkward on the sidewalk, fingering the bracelet in his pocket. He felt oddly nervous. What if Jensen didn’t like it? What if he thought it was too much? Or too little? Maybe he should have just bought him that Nintendo game he’d been eyeing? “Hey, Jared. Wow, haven’t seen you in a while.” He jerked awake from his musings to find Sandy gazing up at him with her wide brown eyes. “Oh hey, Sandy,” he said warily. Close to two months of absence had done nothing to diminish the hopeful look in her eyes and he inwardly sighed. He hadn’t really seen her since summer vacation started, hadn’t really even thought about her either. He met up with Chad every now and then but most of his time was spent with Jensen. They weren’t hiding their relationship but they weren’t flaunting it either and he guessed the memo must have slipped Sandy by. “What are you doing here?” she asked and looked around curiously. “Waiting for someone?” Her voice was cheerful but he could detect a hint of trepidation in it. “Actually, yeah. Jensen. We’re gonna see the new Coen movie.” Jensen’s choice, not his. He’d wanted to see Saw IV but been told in no way would he get a single kiss if they did. That had pretty much killed that idea. She visibly relaxed, her smile returning tenfold. “Oh, I’ve really wanted to see that one. Hey, do you think he’ll mind if I tag along?” She batted her eyes at him, hopeful. Jared blinked. “What?” Why on earth would she think it was okay to crash in on a date? And then he realized that she had no idea it was a date. As far as she was concerned they were just two guys going to see a movie. “Sandy, listen…” “You know, I’ve been wanting to ask you…” She looked away, obviously embarrassed. “I know it’s not exactly the way it’s supposed to go but I was wondering if maybe I could ask you out on a date?” Jared opened his mouth, trying to find a way to let her down easy. She was a nice girl and it wasn’t her fault that he wasn’t interested. “Sandy, I really like you…” he started but that was obviously the completely wrong thing to say because her face lit up and she laughed happily. “Oh Jared, I really like you too!” she said and threw her arms around his neck. “I like you very, very much.” And then she jumped in his arms and planted a big wet kiss right on his lips. He froze, arms instinctively coming up to her waist to keep her from falling. He tried to push her away but she was incredibly strong for being such a small girl and all he could do was breathe through his nose and get ready to tell her off the moment she let go of his lips. Which was when he heard the familiar rumbling of a truck and looked up just in time to see Jensen staring at him in stunned shock from the driver’s seat, and then his mouth set in a thin hard line and he pulled back into traffic, running a red light as he speeded away. Fuck! He jerked his head to the side and pushed Sandy off him so hard she stumbled and almost fell to her knees. “Get off me! Fuck! Jensen!” he yelled and ran into the street but the truck was already gone. “Fuck! Fuckfuckfuck!!” “What is wrong with you?” Sandy yelled at him, tears in her eyes. “I thought…” “Well, you thought wrong!” He turned to face her, his voice rising in anger. “Sandy, I’m gay. And you just kissed me in front of my boyfriend who now thinks I’m cheating on him. With you!” He suddenly felt faint and sat down hard on the curb, hiding his face in his hands. “Oh God! What am I gonna do?” “You’re… gay?” “Yes! God, Sandy, you’ve been throwing yourself at me for over a year! Didn’t you ever stop to think that maybe I wasn’t interested?” “Oh God! I can’t believe…” He lifted his head to glare at her. “Honestly? I don’t care. You need to have a small meltdown or tell me I’m doomed to hell or whatever, do it in your own time.” He stood up, rubbing a palm over his face. “I need to go fix this mess you made, see if he even wants to talk to me.” “I’m sorry. I had no idea. Jared…” “No. Just leave me alone.” He hurried away, leaving her standing dumbfounded on the sidewalk as he pulled his cell out of his pocket. He hit 3 on speed dial and listened to it ring. When it was picked up he exhaled in relief but it got cut off immediately before he could get a word in. Shit! He tried again but the ringing kept being cut off and it wasn’t until his tenth call that he finally got Jensen’s voice. “Jared, don’t call me again. Ever!” it said coldly and the line went dead. No! Nonono! This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. They were supposed to love each other forever and ever. They were supposed to make out in the back row of the movie and then have sex by the lake. Jared was supposed to give Jensen his bracelet! He’d taken the bus downtown but in his despair he’d just started running homewards, not noticing the dark clouds gathering above. He was hurrying through the cemetery as the sky opened and rain poured down on him, soaking him through in less than a minute. How very fitting. He stumbled through the cemetery, wishing himself dead, wishing Jensen would find him dead and cry over him, knowing he had died of a broken heart. He imagined his own headstone, saying “Here lies Jared Padalecki. We’re glad to see him go, the cheating bastard. May he burn in Hell.” It made him sob with self-pity. Oh God, his life was over! When he finally stumbled home two hours later he was soaking wet and shaking. His mother came out as she heard the commotion in the hallway and rushed forward when he fell to his knees, coughing and gasping for breath. “Oh Jared, honey! What happened?” “I think I’m dying,” he choked out and started crying. “Let’s get you inside and out of these wet clothes first,” she said soothingly and helped him to his feet. He clung to her like he was five years old again and had just lost his favourite toy to that nasty dog next door. “I’ve lost him,” he sobbed and buried his face in her neck. “He won’t… he won’t even talk to me!” “Jared, honey, I can’t…” She huffed, stumbling under his weight. “Sweetie, you’re way too big for me to hold you up. Come on, just up the stairs and then I’ll cuddle with you as much as you want.” “He thinks I cheated on him but I didn’t!” Jared continued, oblivious to her struggling. “I didn’t, I swear! She just kissed me, I didn’t do anything.” “Ah.” She pulled him up the stairs and gently pushed him into his room. “Ok, now take your pants off.” “I’m gonna die alone!” he wailed and she sighed, struggling to unbutton the wet denim. “No, you won’t. I’ll be here with you. And you’re not gonna die anyway.” “He hates me! Jensen hates me!” “I’m sure he doesn’t. Some help here, honey.” She finally managed to get him out off the soaking wet clothes and he was so wrapped up in his own misery he didn’t even flinch when she stripped him naked of his underwear as well before pushing him down on the bed. “Now under the covers and I’ll bring you some hot tea.” “There’s no use. My life is over!” he cried into his pillow and she patted his wet hair. “Now just you calm down and I’ll be right back.” He was asleep and snoring before she was halfway down the stairs.   The next couple of days went by in a haze. He ran a high fever and slipped in and out of consciousness as he dreamed of Jensen chopping at him with an axe and Sandy bouncing up and down on his dick while Ben and Cody recorded the whole thing on a video camera. “Fucking-eh, this will be great for our school project. We’re gonna show it on the big screen so the whole school will see what you did.” Ben cackled evilly and then Jeff was there with a rod, beating Jared furiously while growling, “This is what you get for hurting my son!” Tom threw back his head and laughed before pushing Jensen to his knees and whipping out his cock. “Watch and learn, kid,” he said and thrust into Jensen’s mouth. Jared woke up, gasping and whimpering, only to slip back into the same dream over and over again. When the fever finally broke on the third day he was exhausted and depressed and his mother was starting to look increasingly worried. “Jared, sweetie, you’ve got to snap out of this. I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think. If you just talk to him...” “Maybe it’s for the best,” his dad said from the doorway. “That girl, Sandy, she really does like you. She’s been calling here twice a day.” “Gerald! Stop it! “What? I’m trying to help.” “Jared is gay. He doesn’t have any interest in that girl. Right?” she asked and turned to Jared who was watching the rather surreal argument taking place in front of him through a haze. “I mean, you didn’t do anything to make her think…” “No! She kissed me! I didn’t do anything! I don’t want her. I just want Jensen.” He coughed and fumbled for the cell phone by his bed. “I need… I need to call him. Again. I need to call him again.” She sighed but didn’t argue, just watched him with sad eyes as once again the ringing was cut off. “I don’t think you can do this over the phone,” she said sympathetically. “Just focus on getting better and then you can go over there and talk to him face to face.” “What if he doesn’t want to see me? What if he never wants to see me ever again?” “Well, then I’ll go with you and help you kick his ass!” Jared stared at her. “Mom! Did you just say ‘ass’?” “No. Now get some rest,” she said firmly and ushered her amused husband out of the room. It took him three more days until he was well enough to be allowed out of the house and the first thing he did was to ride his bike to Jensen’s home. He rang the bell, out of breath and feeling sick with nervousness but it was Jeff who opened the door, not Jensen. “Jared,” he said, the familiar grin nowhere to be seen. “I’m sorry but I can’t let you in.” “I need to explain!” he begged. “It wasn’t me, I didn’t do it. She just grabbed me!” Jeff sighed. “Honestly, I don’t even know what went down but he refuses to get out of his room and has banned me from ever letting you in. There’s really nothing I can do.” “But I need… Jensen!” he yelled in through the door. “Jensen, please!” Jeff pushed him back and started to close the door. “Son, you need to go. We can’t have this kind of ruckus here. Just give him some time and I’m sure he’ll come around.” “How can he come around if he doesn’t even know what really happened? Please, Mr. Morgan, I need to see him. I need to explain.” Jeff shook his head. “Please leave now. And don’t even think about using the ladder, boy, I’ve chained it to the wall.” Damn! The door shut in his face and he stood out of breath and defeated on the porch, feeling perfectly hopeless. So that was it. They really were over. Forever. Dazed he grabbed his bike and got on, not really knowing where he was headed, he just felt like he was suffocating and desperately needed air. He was going faster and faster as he reached the end of the street, eyes still unfocused and mind numb. He never even saw the car coming.   He woke up in a world of white and for a moment he panicked, thinking he’d actually died and gone to Heaven. But as the room around him slowly came into focus he realized he was lying in a hospital bed. And that everything really, really hurt. “Ow,” he moaned and someone was instantly by his side, a cool hand stroking his forehead. “Oh sweetie, you had me so worried,” his mother said in a choked voice. “Me and your dad both.” “What happened?” he croaked out, now spotting his dad hovering behind her. “You were in an accident, honey. But you’re going to be alright. The head injury knocked you out for a couple of days but they think you’re going to be fine.” “Accident?” He frowned and that’s when he saw that his leg was set in cast and hanging in traction. “My leg!” “It’s going to be alright,” his dad said soothingly. “It’s just broken. You’ll be out of the cast in another six weeks.” “Six weeks!” He let his head fall back on the pillows, groaning in misery. “I’ll miss the rest of my summer vacation!” His mother slapped his arm angrily. “Now you listen to me, Jared Tristan Padalecki! You are lucky that was all you broke. The driver said you didn’t even slow down, just rode your bike straight into traffic. What’s wrong with you? You could have gotten yourself killed!” He flinched, surprised by her anger. “I was distracted, ok? I went to see Jensen and he refused to see me.” Everything suddenly came back to him and he hitched his breath, tears springing into his eyes. “Mom, I think it’s over. I tried but it was no good. He hates me.” He closed his eyes, pulling the covers over his head. “I don’t know what to do without him.” “Well, at least there I can give you some good news.” Confused he pulled the covers back down to find her nodding at the door. Jensen was hesitantly entering the room, looking frantic with worry. “Is he…?” he asked in a small voice and Jared didn’t think he’d ever heard anything more beautiful. Jared’s mother smiled at Jensen, beckoning him in. “We’ll leave you boys to chat but not for long, Jared needs his rest.” She pulled her husband with her out of the room, closing the door behind her, and they were left looking at each other awkwardly. “Hey,” Jensen finally said and moved closer. “Hey,” Jared echoed, uncertain. “How did you know I was here?” “Chad.” Jensen gave a small smile. “Apparently he was gonna kick my ass if I didn’t get over here pronto. Not that I wouldn’t have,” he hurried to add. “Soon as he told me I got here as fast as I could. Been waiting for two days for you to wake up, ” he finished quietly. “You scared the shit out of me.” Jared bit his lip. “Oh.” He should probably say he was sorry but he didn’t really want to. After all Jensen had broken his heart. After a few minutes of awkward silence Jensen finally asked softly, “How are you feeling?” “Hurt,” Jared said, his lower lip wobbling. “Very hurt.” Jensen’s eyes widened in alarm. “Do you need more drugs? You want me to call someone in?” Jared rolled his eyes. “No, I’m hurt because of you. How could you think I cheated on you, Jen? And then you wouldn’t even see me, wouldn’t let me explain.” Jensen bit his lip, looking uncertain. “I saw you. With Sandy. And I just…” Jared sighed in frustration. “Jensen, I’m gay. I’m a gay guy who had the most amazing boyfriend in the world. You really thought I was the kind of guy who’d cheat on you? On our two month anniversary? With a girl?” Jensen looked down, cheeks blushing. “I’m sorry. I just… I got so mad. And I thought…” “She jumped me, man. I don’t know what she was thinking but she obviously misunderstood something because she jumped me and kissed me and that’s when you showed up. I never kissed her back; I was just trying to pry her off me without dropping her on her ass.” A smile tugged at Jensen’s lips. “Yeah?” he asked, looking hopeful. “Yes! And if you’d just let me explain I could have told you right then and not had to have spent the last week feeling miserable.” “I’m sorry,” Jensen said again and rubbed the back of his neck. “I know I screwed up. I just… I got so mad. And hurt. And I know I didn’t answer your phone calls but I was too angry to talk to you over the phone. If you’d just showed up sooner…” Jared sighed. “I was sick in bed, Jen. I got sick walking home from downtown, where you left me, in the pouring rain! I was out of it for days. I came over as soon as I could and you wouldn’t even let me see you.” “Oh.” “Yeah.” “I didn’t know.” He bit his lip. “Sorry.” Jared suddenly felt incredibly tired. He closed his eyes and muttered, “You broke my heart.” “You broke my heart,” Jensen argued but Jared shook his head. “No, I didn’t. You thought I did but I didn’t do anything. But you, you deliberately broke my heart, Jen.” He pouted. “And then my leg too!” Jensen sputtered. “I didn’t break your leg! A car broke your leg!” “Because you broke my heart and I was blinded by grief.” Jared sighed dramatically. “I’m a broken man, Jen. A broken and damaged man. Nothing will heal me.” “Jare, your leg will heal in a few weeks. And your heart…” Jared could hear Jensen swallow. “I’d like to mend that if you let me.” Jared opened his eyes. “Yeah? You want…” “If you want.” Jared’s face broke into a smile. “Does that mean I’m your boyfriend again?” Jensen smiled back. “Yes,” he said and crawled up on the bed, pressing his lips against Jared’s. They kissed as if they hadn’t seen each other for months instead of days, with Jensen pressed up against Jared’s side, one arm over his chest to keep from falling off the bed. “My parents…” Jared finally gasped. “Are probably in the hall, talking to my parents.” “Oh God.” “Yep.” Jensen nuzzled against his neck, fingers tangled in Jared’s hair. “I missed you.” “I missed you too,” Jared said and kissed him again. “And I’m gonna show you just how much… soon.” He sighed, his eyes slipping close again. “But now I’m kinda tired,” he mumbled and Jensen’s arm tightened around his chest. “Rest and I’ll be here when you wake up.” “You promise?” “Yes, I promise.” Jensen kissed his ear. “And as soon as I get you alone at home? We’re gonna pick up where we left off one week ago.” Jared’s eyes sprung open. “But… What about my leg?” “Don’t worry. You just lay on your back, nice and easy, and I’ll ride you like a pony,” Jensen whispered huskily in his ear. “Slow and sweet and long until you forget all about that damn leg.” “Ungh,” Jared moaned. Jensen laughed softly. “Now sleep,” he said and kissed Jared on the cheek. Really, for being a virgin Jensen was the most talented cocktease in the world. Well, not for much longer, Jared thought as his eyelids started to drop. Soon as he was out of here Jensen’s ass was his! He dreamt of Jensen in a nurse uniform, riding him like a pro. Whether it was because of the drugs or the fact that Jensen slept peacefully right beside him… Did it really matter?   Epilogue   “This is never gonna work,” Jared groaned and hoisted himself higher up on the bed, beating at the pillows to try and get more support for his back. “Yes, it will,” Jensen said stubbornly, putting a pillow under Jared’s cast leg. He stood back, frowning, and then removed the pillow again, shaking his head. “Crap. Ok, let’s try this. Dangle it over the edge of the bed.” Jared raised his eyebrows at him. “I’m supposed to keep it supported. Not… dangling.” Jensen gave him an irritated glare. “Dude, you want me to break it again? Because if you’ve got your leg straightened out on the bed… Once I start bouncing the strain will be too much.” Jared’s eyes widened. “Bouncing?” “You can only use one leg to lift your hips so unless you want to tip me over with every thrust I’m gonna have to do most of the work, ok?” Jared gave him a skeptical look and Jensen sighed. “You see any other solution?” “If I try sitting on the edge again with you straddling my lap…” Jared suggested even if he knew it was no use. “We already tried that,” Jensen interrupted. “It was too much weight on your leg, remember? Just lay back like that and…” He moved around the bed and tugged Jared’s right leg gently to the side until he could bend his knee. His foot hovered about five inches above the floor, which was a bit closer than ideal, but it would have to do. Maybe once the bone started to heal they wouldn’t have to be quite so careful but right now they were both too wary to take any chance with it. Wasn’t as if this was the first bone Jared had broken, being rather accident prone, and he knew Jensen had painful memories of broken bones himself that wouldn’t let him risk jeopardizing the healing progress. Jensen stood back, looking Jared over with a frown and he could feel himself blushing. They’d been at this so long his erection was long gone and he felt kinda dumb, sitting there naked with his leg all stiff and clumsy and his dick limp as a noodle. Considering how much he’d been looking forward to finally getting said dick into Jensen’s ass, the current lack of enthusiasm it was showing was a bummer. “Scoot down,” Jensen said, “so you’re more on your back. Just a couple of pillows under your head maybe.” “You sound like a porn flick director,” Jared quipped but did as he was told, letting his ass slide down the bed and rearranging his pillows once again. “I guess this is when they would send in the fluffer,” he added miserably and gave his cock a disappointed poke. “Yeah, right. As if I would let anyone get near your cock but me,” Jensen joked but when Jared didn’t so much as smile his face got serious and he crawled up on the bed, crouching by Jared’s side. “Hey, this is supposed to be fun, you know. Not… emo-sex.” “I’m not emo,” Jared protested. “I’m just… dead. Or my dick is.” He blinked. “You think it’s the painkillers? Oh God, maybe they killed my cock!” Jensen shook his head, smiling softly. “Dude, they didn’t kill your cock. Your cock is fine. It just needs a bit of encouragement.” “You think so?” Jared said hopefully, giving his sorry excuse for a dick another poke. It twitched slightly but that was it. “I don’t know. Looks pretty dead to me.” “Let’s see if we can resurrect it then.” Jensen slid down on the bed, tilting his head as he studied the task at hand, before leaning forward and licking a slow stripe along the soft shape and then around the head. It twitched again, a bit more forcefully this time, and Jared watched in fascination as it slowly started to lift and harden with every lick that Jensen applied. Usually it was enough for him to just look at Jensen to get painfully hard, so this, having to coax his dick into action, it was a whole new experience and actually not that unpleasant, if a bit humiliating. His dick got harder as his breathing got shallower and by the time it was towering to its full length he was gasping for breath and his whole body was pulsating with the need to come. Which would totally ruin all of their preparation. “Jen, Jen. You gotta…” He pulled at Jensen’s hair. “I’m gonna come.” Jensen quickly let him go, sending him a stern gaze. “You better not. Even with your recovery time I’m not ready to wait for you to get it up again.” “Me neither,” Jared groaned and concentrated on breathing as he waited for the urge to die down. “Don’t wanna wait another minute.” He grabbed Jensen’s arm, pulling him in for a kiss before leaning back, eyes dark and heated. “You still good?” he asked, indicating the half-empty tube of lubrication lying on the bedside table. They’d already done the preparation part but with all the time spent maneuvering Jared into the right position maybe Jensen was drying up again and that would definitely be bad. Jensen scrunched up his nose in an adorable way and then lay down on his back and reached down. Jared’s eyes widened when he watched Jensen slide his own fingers into his body, hitching his breath slightly as he twisted them inside. If Jared hadn’t been rockhard already that definitely would have done the trick. “Nah, I’m good,” Jensen breathed as if Jared had just asked him if he needed more beer or something, moaning softly as he pulled his fingers back out. “Fuck, can’t wait for you to be in me.” “Unghugh,” Jared agreed, his tongue feeling big and dry in his mouth. Jesus fuck! “You ready?” Jensen asked, quickly sliding the condom over Jared’s cock and then moving to straddle his hips. All Jared could do was nod and hold his breath, waiting for Jensen to lower himself onto his cock. It missed at first, sliding in the smeared lube between Jensen’s ass cheeks and poking at his balls instead. Jensen cursed and Jared closed his eyes in frustration, wondering if they were ever gonna be able to do this right. Then he felt Jensen’s fingers close around the base of his cock and before he had time to blink his eyes open his dick was being directed into something hot and wet and.. oh my God, so tight! “Jesus!” he choked out, grabbing onto Jensen’s trembling thighs to help hold him up. “You okay?” Jensen was staring down at him, eyes wide. “Yeah. Just… Can we do this very slowly?” he said, breath hitching. “Yeah.” Jared nodded, swallowing repeatedly. “As slow as you like. I’ll keep still and you just… You take your time, man.” Jensen nodded as well, biting his lip and then he breathed out, lowering himself another inch. He sucked in his breath, fingers digging into Jared’s biceps where he held on to him. “Christ!” he grunted. “You sure we’re doing this right?” Jared froze. “Does it hurt that bad?” “No, it’s just… It’s not exactly good, you know.” Jensen clenched his jaw and sunk down a little lower, lips pressed together so tight Jared was starting to regret this whole thing. It wasn’t worth it if it was just hurting him. This was supposed to be good, right? Or maybe Jensen was right, maybe they were doing it wrong. “You want to stop?” he asked even if his cock was screaming at him to push further into that amazing heat. Jensen shook his head but his face was still all scrunched up and that was it, they obviously couldn’t do this. “We can stop, it’s okay. Let’s just stop,” Jared said and reached down to grab his dick and pull it out but Jensen’s hand shot out and grabbed him by the wrist before he was half-way there. “Jared? Shut up.” He fixed Jared with his stare, eyes blown wide and nostrils flaring. “I’m not pussying out, I’m just taking time to get adjusted to your ridiculously big cock.” ‘It’s not ridiculous,” Jared argued but he was too relieved to really care. “You sure you’re okay?” “I’m sure.” Jensen closed his eyes and slowly slid down, holding his breath until his ass finally made contact with Jared’s thighs. “Oh God,” he gasped. “Oh God good or oh God bad?” Jared grunted, clenching his own jaw as he desperately fought the urge to come. Who could have imagined it felt like this? And they hadn’t even really started yet! “Oh God, I have Cockzilla in my ass,” Jensen groaned. “That sounds bad,” Jared told him, starting to get nervous. What if he had broken Jensen with his cock? God, what if his cock really was a freak of nature like Chad kept telling him and he’d never be allowed to fuck anyone ever again, especially not Jensen? “I thought you liked cheesy horror movies?” Jensen asked and this time his voice wasn’t quite as strained. He even smiled a little and Jared smiled hesitantly back. “Not where the damsel in distress gets impaled and has to walk bowlegged the rest of her life. Oh wait, you already do that.” Jensen swatted at his head but he was grinning and Jared could feel him slowly relaxing. He was still tight as hell but at least it didn’t feel like he was gonna squish Jared’s cock in half. “I think…” Jensen said, biting his lip. “Yeah, you can move now. But slowly.” Jared frowned. “I thought you were gonna be the one moving? Bouncing and riding me like a pony? Wasn’t that what you said?” “That was before I knew your cock was gonna suck all the energy out of me through my ass. Dude, my legs feel like Jell-O. You’re lucky I don’t just drop flat on top of you and lie there until morning.” “You make it sound like it’s alien or something,” Jared pouted but placed his hands around Jensen’s waist, lifting him as slowly as he could and then lowering him back down. Oh God. “Fuck,” Jensen groaned, dropping his head back to expose the length of his throat and Jared had to fight not to lunge forward and bite him on his Adam’s apple. “At least help some,” he panted instead, tightening his grip on Jensen’s waist. “You weigh a frigging ton, man.” “Shut up.” Jensen pushed against Jared’s chest, his thighs trembling as he lifted himself up. Together they managed to create a slow rhythm, hesitant at first but then as Jensen relaxed and his discomfort started to subside he moved more enthusiastically until he really was riding Jared like a pony. Or, you know, graceful stallion. The term pony was a bit too girly, even for assfucking, Jared thought. Not that he was able to form much more complicated thoughts at the moment than just ‘Oh God’ and ‘So good, it’s so good’ while trying desperately not to come. It was so tight, so deliciously warm and good but what hit him more than anything was the fact that it was Jensen. He had his cock inside Jensen and that was the most amazing thing in the whole world. He shifted on the bed, lifting his hips experimentally and Jensen sucked in his breath. “Fuck. Do that again.” “This?” He thrust upwards, grinning when Jensen’s eyes went wide and his lips parted in a perfect ‘O’. “Did I find it? The spot, did I find it?” he asked exited. “Oh God, yes. You definitely found it,” Jensen moaned, jerking his hips. “Fuck. Again.” Yes! Haha, victory! Jared hummed the Batman theme in his head as he took his aim again. His leg was starting to ache but he didn’t care. He bit his lip, fighting his own need to come as he thrust into Jensen as hard as he dared, grunting and sweating. He was so close, so damn close, but he didn’t want to blow it. Didn’t want to come until Jensen was ready. Frantic he finally reached down and wrapped his fingers around Jensen’s cock, jerking him off in an awkward rhythm since he had lost all ability to co-ordinate his motions, but apparently it was good enough because Jensen stiffened and with a strangled shout he came violently over Jared’s fingers and stomach. ‘Thank God,’ Jared thought absentmindedly and let go off his own orgasm, wrapping his arms around Jensen and pulling him down to his chest as he shuddered and came as well. They lay like that for a long time, Jensen gasping against Jared’s throat with Jared’s arms trapping him against his heaving chest. “That was so good!” Jensen finally blurted out and then they were both laughing, almost hysterically. “I swear, even if my dad had walked in on us, this time I wouldn’t have been able to stop,” Jared said, pressing his lips against Jensen’s sweat-damp neck. “I would have killed you if you’d stopped,” Jensen told him, resting his cheek on Jared’s shoulder. Jared chuckled, hugging Jensen even tighter. “You know I love you, right?” he asked softly, closing his eyes when Jensen kissed his ear. “Yeah, I know.” “And?” Jared prodded. Jensen snorted. “And I might love you too.” “Yeah, you do,” Jared said smugly and squeezed Jensen so tight he let out a sound like a squeaky toy. His leg hurt and his dick was all sticky as it softened and slipped out of Jensen’s body. He felt like he had a buckload of lube stuck in his pubes and he was pretty sure Jensen had fallen asleep because that definitely felt like drool dribbling on his shoulder. Really, life didn’t get any better than this. Fin Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!