Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/1008747.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Harry_Potter_-_J._K._Rowling
  Relationship:
      Harry_Potter/Voldemort
  Character:
      Harry_Potter, Voldemort
  Additional Tags:
      Angst, First_Time, Coercion, Mindfuck, Work_In_Progress
  Stats:
      Published: 2013-10-18 Chapters: 2/? Words: 15647
****** Speak a Different Tongue ******
by Maeglin_Yedi
Summary
     Can Harry trust Voldemort when Snape betrays them to each other?
Notes
     Pairing: Harry Potter/Lord Voldemort
     Rating: NC-17
     Warnings/category: dubious consent, manipulation, WIP, HBP spoilers
     Disclaimer: JKR owns them. I play with them.
     Summary: Can Harry trust Voldemort when Snape betrays them to each
     other?
     A/N: Big thanks to Gina for the beta!
     Fair warning: This is a work in progress and might remain a work in
     progress for some time, though I do plan to finish it in due time.
***** Chapter 1 *****
Harry didn't think he'd ever get used to the feeling of being pushed through a
narrow tube. When he opened his eyes, he found himself on a country road, large
beech trees offering shadow from the June sun.
Three days he'd managed to stay with the Dursleys before he'd concluded sitting
around wasn't going to help him find the remaining four Horcruxes. Ron and
Hermione were supposed to join him at the end of his first week at the
Dursleys', and part of Harry knew it was safer to wait for them before
undertaking anything.
But patience had never been Harry's strongest point, and he was convinced he'd
find a Horcrux in the ruins of his parents' house in Godric's Hollow. There was
no reason not to investigate it on his own now, and return to the Dursleys
later that day. He knew how to apparate, after all.
Harry glanced around, pulled his invisibility cloak closer around himself, and
started walking, wand in hand. His parents' house, or what was left of it, was
supposed to be somewhere at the end of the road. Something heavy settled in
Harry's stomach. He dreaded seeing his parents' house, the place where they'd
died, where Voldemort had almost killed him. But he was also certain it was a
significant place, a location important enough for Voldemort to have hidden a
Horcrux there.
Something black, like a shadow, moved under a beech tree to Harry's right, and
Harry stopped dead in his tracks, raising his wand. The tree's branches waved
at him in the warm summer wind, assuring him he was alone and quite safe.
Harry sighed, and continued his walk.
And then the birds in the trees around him stopped singing their hopeful songs.
Harry halted again, and glanced around. The shadow was back, and it moved, and
Harry recognized the looming figure.
But before he could wrap his lips and tongue around a curse, a jet of red light
shot from Snape's wand. Something hard struck Harry in the chest and he was
thrown backwards, his body falling to the ground as his mind fell into complete
darkness.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
Footsteps. Distant.
A flash of red light illuminated Snape's face in the shadows of giant trees.
Footsteps. Closer.
Cold stones, rough and rugged beneath his palms. Red eyes staring down at him.
Breathing. Close.
Light and warmth as Harry opened his eyes, his mind slowly drifting back into
consciousness.
A voice. Somewhere.
Harry heard flames crackling, and as he let his head loll to the side he saw a
large fireplace, a comforting fire burning inside it.
A voice. Very close.
"Potter!"
Harry fell, and he hadn't even known he'd been lying on something. He landed on
the floor with a dull thud, and scrambled away on sheer instinct, since his
mind hadn't caught up with reality just yet.
But that voice.
"Potter! Wake up!"
His wand. He needed his wand. But his arms felt like liquid, much like the time
Lockhart had spelled away his bones, and his fingers were stiff. Still, Harry
blindly reached for his pockets in a desperate search for his wand.
He needed his wand because Lord Voldemort was staring at him from across the
room.
"Don't bother, Potter. I already went through your pockets."
He didn't have his wand. Voldemort had taken his wand. Harry's heart was
beating so fast, for a moment he feared it would burst right out of his chest.
And yet, he didn't seem able to suck in enough air to keep his mind from
slipping in and out of focus.
He was wandless, and Voldemort was there. Harry briefly closed his eyes,
concentrating as best he could, and ordered his body to disapparate back to the
Dursleys'. He willed it, wanted it, gave everything he had into that single
command, but nothing happened. He tried again, but there was no tingle of magic
inside him, nothing that even remotely felt like apparition.
He couldn't apparate. He was stuck.
"I know you can hear me!" Voldemort had turned his back to Harry, and he seemed
to be talking to someone else, although Harry had no idea who that might be. He
didn't even have an idea where he was.
He needed his wand, dammit.
"When I get out, and be sure that I will get out, you are going to wish you'd
never been born, Severus." Voldemort picked up an object and threw it against
the wall, where it shattered into a thousand pieces. "I will teach you the
meaning of pain, you filthy traitor."
Severus?
Severus Snape.
What?
Harry abandoned his fruitless search for his wand and stared at Voldemort, who
paced around the room, hands clasped behind his back tightly. From the door on
the right to the desk, then to the large windows, and back to the door. Over
and over again, until Harry was convinced none of it was real and he was stuck
inside a bizarre dream.
But the attack in Godric's Hollow hadn't been a dream.
"Finally awake, Potter?" Voldemort stopped and turned to Harry, who could do
little more than look for something that could be used as a weapon now that he
didn't have his wand. But there was nothing besides the fireplace behind him
and the rug beneath him and the couch in front of him.
He pushed himself up, and almost fell against the mantel when his legs buckled.
He caught himself just in time, one hand grabbing for support and finding it
when it touched the wall beside the hearth.
"What's going on?" Harry asked, his voice dry and raspy. Something was going
on, because Voldemort hadn't killed him yet. Hell, Voldemort didn't even have
his wand out.
"What is going on, indeed," Voldemort said, and looked around the room for a
few moments before snapping his gaze back to Harry. "A question I've been
trying to answer for the last hour while you were snoring on the sofa."
Harry gasped for breath, his mind in danger of shutting down under the
onslaught of questions that exploded inside it. Where was he? Why was Voldemort
keeping him here? Why hadn't Voldemort at least locked him up or tied him down?
And why on earth wasn't Voldemort trying to kill him?
And while Harry was tempted to ask every single one of those questions, he
didn't want to give Voldemort ideas, so he settled for the least provocative
question. "Why are you keeping me here?"
Voldemort arched a thin eyebrow. "Oh yes, of course I'm keeping you here. This
is exactly how I had planned to spend my holidays. Locked up in a house with
the Chosen One." Voldemort spat out the last words as if they were the foulest
thing he had ever tasted.
A flare of defiance burst through Harry, and he straightened his shoulders,
pleased to feel the strength seep back into his arms and legs.
But not only his limbs regained their function. His mind was catching up as
well. Voldemort seemed angry, but not at Harry. He'd been yelling at Severus
Snape. Voldemort also mentioned being locked up with him. And Voldemort didn't
have his wand out.
"You don't have your wand either, do you?" Harry asked without thinking.
An incredibly sour look passed over Voldemort's face before it twisted up in
disgust.
"You don't have your wand," Harry said again, this time in conclusion. If
Voldemort didn't have his wand, Harry might be able to...
Without finishing that thought, Harry eyed the room quickly, and when he looked
over his shoulder at the mantel, he saw what he'd been looking for.
A heavy silver candlestick. A potential weapon.
Harry reached for it, weighing it against his palm and mentally calculating how
hard he would have to swing his arm to bash Voldemort's skull in.
"Don't try me, Potter," Voldemort said, taking a step towards Harry, his fists
clenching beside his body. "Don't even think about using that."
"You don't have your wand," Harry said yet again, drawing strength from those
words. He gritted his teeth in determination, raising the candlestick halfway
up in the air, and took a step towards Voldemort.
Who moved so fast Harry didn't even see him coming, but found himself pinned to
the wall while a strong hand curled around his throat, cutting off his air.
"So rash, Potter. So careless," Voldemort whispered, his red eyes narrowed and
his pupils dilated. Harry struggled and kicked, and tried to raise the
candlestick again, but Voldemort caught his wrist, and didn't just squeeze it,
but pulled it backwards until Harry was forced to drop his only weapon.
"Remember, I don't need magic to hurt you." Voldemort leaned closer, and Harry
felt a jolt of pain shooting from his scar. He tried to kick again, his other
hand tearing at Voldemort's robes, but Voldemort moved closer still, and
trapped him against the wall.
"I could snap your neck right now, Harry. All it would take is one," Voldemort
tightened his fingers around Harry's throat, giving it a careless jerk, "little
twist of my fingers."
Harry stiffened. He tried not to, tried to keep struggling, but the idea that
Voldemort now controlled his life, could kill him with one flick of his wrist,
made Harry's body refuse to operate, and he stared in those hideous red eyes,
his own gaze losing its focus while his glasses slipped down his nose.
"Or I could do other things with you," Voldemort breathed as he leaned towards
Harry's ear. One pale hand traveled down Harry's body and cupped his groin.
"Anything I want to."
And as quickly as Voldemort had caught him, Harry found himself slumping to the
floor again. Voldemort turned around, and a small part of Harry's mind screamed
at him that this was his chance. But Harry didn't agree with that and only
cared about one thing: to get out of there as fast as he could.
Scrambling to his feet, Harry fled. He burst through the first door he saw, and
found himself in a hallway. He slammed yet another door open, and vaguely
noticed that he had landed himself in a kitchen.
Which had a door. With a large glass window through which thick beams of
sunlight entered the light room, coloring all the white cupboards yellow.
Harry lunged towards it, intent on jumping right through. But a barrier, an
invisible, strong barrier, thwarted his plans and threw him back into the
kitchen. He landed on the floor while his head slammed against the corner of a
cupboard.
A flash of a pain, searing and blinding, and then something warm dripped down
his eyebrow.
That didn't stop Harry, and he pushed himself up and grabbed a wooden chair. He
threw it at the glass with all his strength, but it bounced back just as he had
and crashed against the table.
He was trapped. He was trapped inside an unfamiliar house with Voldemort. Harry
was suddenly very close to panicking, and it was only through sheer
stubbornness that he managed not to break down.
A weapon. He needed a weapon, so he could at least defend himself.
Pulling open cupboards and drawers at random, Harry found pots and pans and
finally a large steak knife. He palmed it, gripping it tightly so it wouldn't
slip away from his sweaty fingers, and dashed out of the kitchen again.
There was a large staircase to his left, and Harry ran up it, taking two steps
at a time. Then a small hallway with several doors. Harry entered the first
one, and after he made sure he was alone in what turned out to be a bedroom, he
slammed the door shut, checked for a lock that wasn't there, and then leaned
his back against it, letting himself slide to the floor.
He was trapped inside a house with Voldemort. And the only weapon he had was a
knife. How in the bloody hell was he ever going to take out a man who had
survived a Killing Curse, who had split his soul in seven pieces, with a knife?
Harry tried not to think about it as he rested his arms on his drawn up knees
and leaned his forehead against them.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
Harry woke with a stiff neck and an aching back, half-slumped against the door.
It took him a moment to shake his mind of the last flashes of his dreams, which
had been vivid and surreal.
At least, Harry thought parts of them had been surreal, until he rubbed the
sleep from his eyes, pushed his glasses up his nose, and looked around.
He was still in that unfamiliar bedroom, in that unfamiliar house, trapped
alongside a very familiar enemy.
Taking a deep breath, almost a yawn, Harry stretched and pushed himself up,
noticing that he was still holding the knife. Despite the slight discomforts,
Harry's body felt as if it had had a good night's sleep, and all the remnants
of restraining magic that had bothered him earlier were gone.
His forehead hurt, but not his scar, and when Harry reached for it, he felt
caked blood. Undeniable evidence of what had happened and that he had not been
able to escape this prison. He would have to try again, just like he had to
confront Voldemort again.
But this time Harry would be prepared. Or at least in better shape, and he
tightened his grip around the knife.
Voldemort didn't have his wand, and thus he was as vulnerable as Harry was.
But what if Voldemort had found weapons as well, a soft voice whispered in the
back of Harry's mind. What if Voldemort had found larger, sharper, more
powerful weapons than Harry's pathetic steak knife? And what was Harry going to
do with that knife, anyway? Voldemort couldn't be killed before all the
Horcruxes were destroyed.
Harry silenced that voice and narrowed his eyes, reaching for the doorknob. He
would deal with that when he got to it, and he would not let the speculation
lead him into insecurity.
Opening the door a few inches Harry peeked into the hallway, and when he
neither saw nor heard anything suspicious he crept out of the room, his back
turned to the wall. He kept the knife raised, poised to strike, and moved
silently along the corridor to the stairs. There wasn't a sound except for the
soft ticking of a clock downstairs.
Perhaps Voldemort wasn't there anymore. Perhaps he had found a way out, which
made Harry wonder if perhaps he could find a way out now as well.
"You will bleed for this, Severus!"
Or perhaps Voldemort was still around, busy yelling profanities at Snape that
made little sense to Harry. Still, Harry couldn't very well spend the rest of
the day pressed to a wall in the upstairs corridor, so he crept silently across
the carpeted floor and descended the stairs without a sound.
As he stood at the foot of the stairs and held his breath, Harry heard the
faint sound of rustling paper coming from the kitchen. The knife still gripped
tightly in his fist, Harry tiptoed to the open door, and pressed his back to
the wall again as he glanced around the door post.
Voldemort sat at the kitchen table, the Daily Prophet in his hands.
"Come in, Harry."
Harry started and inhaled a sharp breath. Voldemort's gaze traveled from the
newspaper to the door and met Harry's, and Harry was at a loss of what to do.
He had his knife and Voldemort didn't seem armed at that moment, but Harry
remembered how Voldemort had pushed him up against a wall the previous night,
and any thoughts of attacking Voldemort he might have had vanished under the
weight of that unpleasant memory.
"We've made headlines, boy." Voldemort's gaze had returned to the Prophet, and
Harry worried his lip, still not sure if he should enter the kitchen, stay
where he was, or run back upstairs to hide.
"'Harry Potter and You-Know-Who die in final confrontation,'" Voldemort quoted,
and he held the newspaper so Harry could see the headlines. "Our wands were
delivered to Rufus Scrimgeour as proof of our deaths." Voldemort snorted, his
face wrinkling up in disgust.
"What?" Harry asked, finally daring to make a sound. "Who...what?"
"Get inside, Potter, and sit down. We have much to discuss," Voldemort snarled.
Harry felt a flare of defiance burn in his chest. He had nothing to discuss
with Voldemort. But Harry couldn't deny that something was going on, and
Voldemort seemed to know more about it than he did. Keeping his fingers
tightened around the knife, Harry shuffled inside the kitchen, keeping as much
distance between Voldemort and himself as he could.
"But..." Harry wanted to say they weren't dead, and realized that seemed rather
obvious. But then he thought about ghosts and Inferi, and he suddenly wasn't
all that sure anymore. "We're not dead. Are we?"
Voldemort cocked his head and gave him a look as though Harry had said the
stupidest thing imaginable.
"Yeah, that's what I thought." Harry glanced at the knife in his hand, and then
at Voldemort and the newspaper in Voldemort's hands. He really wanted to
understand what was going on, so he took a few careful steps in Voldemort's
direction. Just enough so he could see around the edge of the Prophet.
The thick black letters announcing his death were still there.
"But," Harry tried again. "My friends will know I'm missing, that I'm not at
the Dursleys'."
Voldemort released a very impatient sound. "Your friends think you're dead. The
whole world believes us dead, Potter."
Harry's mind swayed. "But they haven't any bodies."
"You stupid child!" Voldemort threw the newspaper down on the table. "Of course
they have bodies. It's easy to feed someone Polyjuice Potion and then kill
them. They'll have bodies looking exactly like us."
Inhaling a sharp breath, Harry tried to process that. His friends thought he
was dead. The whole world thought he was dead. While in fact he was locked up
somewhere with bloody Voldemort.
He glanced at the newspaper again, unable to believe it. And he noticed the
picture below the article. Scrimgeour stood there, holding two broken wands,
the tip of a large feather sticking out one of the ends. Harry recognized his
own wand immediately, and he was quite sure the other wand was Voldemort's.
And then he inhaled another startled breath. Behind Scrimgeour stood Severus
Snape. Flanked by Draco and Lucius Malfoy.
"What?" Harry forgot all about Voldemort as he leaned closer to examine the
picture. "That fucking bastard!"
"Glad to see you're catching on," Voldemort said, his voice humorless.
Harry raised his knife, suddenly aware he was standing close to Voldemort, but
Voldemort slapped his hand away. And Harry let him, too shocked by Snape
sneering at him from the picture.
"But how can he – he killed --"
"Dumbledore," Voldemort said, and looked pleased for a moment. "Yes. And then
that traitor lost his nerve." Voldemort pressed his hand down on the article.
"Convinced the Ministry he was working for Dumbledore all along. That Draco and
Lucius had been aiding him in his fight against me. Honestly, that pair of
incompetents? But they believe him, and they believe us dead."
Harry stared at Voldemort with his mouth open. If it weren't for the fact that
Snape had betrayed him too, Harry would have applauded him for stabbing
Voldemort in the back.
"But why this?" Harry waved his hand around. "Why not -- "
"Kill us?" Voldemort glanced up at Harry. "Because Severus can't kill me and he
knows it. I'm convinced he believes you can." Voldemort gave a loud snort. "So
he locks us up in here and hopes you'll be the one who survives."
Harry's mind was spinning, and he reached for something to steady himself, but
when he realized he touched Voldemort's shoulder, he quickly drew his hand
back.
Voldemort raised his gaze again and stared at Harry for a moment. "There is ice
in the cooler," he said, and picked up a cup of tea. He sipped it delicately,
and Harry wondered what the hell he was talking about, until he remembered the
dried blood he'd felt on his forehead earlier.
"I'm fine," he muttered, gritting his teeth.
"No, you aren't," Voldemort said. "And neither am I. We're faced with a problem
without an immediate solution."
Harry gave a faint nod. He'd noticed that much.
"And thus we have much to discuss," Voldemort continued, his thin lips curling
up. "Under any other circumstances I'd be more than happy to end your miserable
excuse of a life, but alas, it seems we might need each other's...assistance to
get out of here. I believe we can only break out of here if we combine our
forces."
Harry blinked. He did not want Voldemort's assistance. Nor did he want to
discuss anything with Voldemort. He wanted to get as far away from Voldemort as
he could, at least until he found the remaining Horcruxes. Once they were
destroyed, Harry was more than happy to ram his knife in Voldemort's chest.
"I don't need you," he said. "I'm going to find a way out of here and I won't
need your bloody help for it."
Voldemort stared at Harry impassively. "Go ahead then, Harry. You have all the
time in the world to find a way out of this house."
Feeling heat rising to his cheeks, Harry glared at Voldemort one last time and
then stomped out of the kitchen in search of some way to escape. A way that did
not include discussing things with the person who'd killed his parents and
who'd almost killed him.
There had to be a way out of the house. There had to be.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
As Harry made his way through the house, meticulously checking every window in
every room he came across, he was forced to conclude this was a Muggle house.
There was electricity, and the rooms were littered with electronic devices,
such as alarm clocks in both of the bedrooms, and a washing machine and a dryer
in what Harry assumed was the laundry room. There was even an electric
toothbrush in the bathroom.
He was also forced to conclude that the invisible, magical barrier he'd
encountered in the kitchen the previous night stretched around the entire
house. No matter how hard he tried, the windows would not break. He couldn't
even touch them, much less bang on them to attract attention.
It was a simple house. There was a dusty attic filled with odd things Harry
thought he might investigate later. There were two bedrooms, a laundry room and
a bathroom on the first floor. And downstairs there was the kitchen, which
Harry avoided all morning since he didn't want to run into Voldemort again, a
dining room, a living room, and a conservatory filled with large plants and a
piano.
All the windows in the house offered the same view; the house was surrounded by
a large garden with wide lawns and tall trees in the distance. No sign of any
neighbors, Muggle or wizard.
Harry sighed and crouched down in the living room. He reached an arm inside the
hearth and learned that even the chimney was protected by the invisible
barrier. He sat back on the rug in front of the fireplace and glanced around
the room. For all the electronic appliances he'd seen around the house, he
hadn't encountered a television or a radio. It seemed Snape had cut them off
from the world entirely.
He was stuck inside a house with Lord Voldemort. If it wasn't for the icy hand
of fear that insistently squeezed around his heart, Harry would have laughed.
It was too ridiculous for words. But it was happening nonetheless, and as he
grew hungry and thirsty and tired, Harry had to conclude that there didn't seem
to be a way out of the house. At least, none Harry could find.
Perhaps he should talk to Voldemort.
Harry hated to admit it, but Voldemort was far more experienced in all things
magical.
He couldn't believe he was stuck with Voldemort. That notion kept torturing
Harry's exhausted mind and eventually it morphed into a throbbing headache.
Harry buried his face in his hands and tried to gather his wits. He figured
he'd need them to talk to Voldemort.
Slowly, he pushed himself up and took a moment to steady his legs before he
walked towards the kitchen. He halted in the kitchen doorway and stared at the
sight before him.
Lord Voldemort was cooking.
Whatever he was making smelled good, but the sight was so surreal all Harry
could do was stand there and stare.
"Found a way out yet?" Voldemort asked without looking up from the stove,
stirring the contents of a large pan.
Harry scuffed his shoe against the threshold. "No," he whispered, his jaws
clenched.
"What are you standing about for, then? Go escape, Harry."
"No," Harry said, stubbornness coloring his voice.
"Is that all you can say?" Voldemort clucked his tongue, and then raised the
ladle to his mouth and tasted whatever he was making.
"What the hell is going on?" Harry yelled, having finally found a voice for the
frustration that had been brewing inside him all day.
Voldemort slowly turned his gaze towards Harry but said nothing.
"Why are we...why are you...cooking?" Harry felt his muscles tense and he
fought back the urge to kick the door.
Voldemort glanced at the clock on the wall above the back door. "Perhaps
because it's supper time," he said, unfazed, and continued stirring.
Harry released a strangled breath. "Why did Snape betray you? Why did he have
to drag me into this?"
"Do get a grip, Potter," Voldemort scolded, his face tight. "Will you join me
for supper or do you prefer to starve?"
Groaning, Harry threw his hands up into the air. "Why are you being so bloody
civil?"
Voldemort's thin lips tugged up into an amused smile. "I assure you, Harry,
that once we get out of here, I will kill you the first chance I get. However,
as long as we are stuck here, I see no reason not to act maturely around each
other. Or is that a concept your hormone-riddled brain can't understand?"
Voldemort narrowed his eyes. "Now, tell me, will you join me for supper?"
Harry huffed and was tempted to say no, but he was rather hungry. "You'll
probably just try to poison me," he muttered, and finally stepped inside the
kitchen. "But sure, I'll join you for supper," he said with a shrug.
"Good. Set the table, and we'll eat and talk." Voldemort turned his back to
Harry, and Harry was tempted to reach for his knife, which he'd kept with him
all day tucked inside the pocket of his robes, and stab Voldemort right there
and then, but he knew that wouldn't be a very smart move, so he controlled
himself and went in search of plates and cutlery.
Once Harry set two places – as far apart as the kitchen table allowed –
Voldemort lifted the pan to the table and Harry peeked inside it curiously.
"What is it?"
"Boeuf Bourguignon," Voldemort said, and sat down. "It's French."
Harry made sure he didn't look impressed, but he had to admit that it smelled
quite good. He sat down as well and watched quietly as Voldemort filled his
plate. After he was finished, he offered the ladle to Harry.
"You asked why Severus betrayed me," Voldemort said as Harry filled his own
plate. "Of course, I can only guess what his motivations are, but I daresay he
saw an opportunity and grabbed it."
"So he wants to take your place, then?" Harry asked, unsure. "Become Dark Lord
and all?"
Voldemort let out a snort. "No, Severus has always lacked that ambition. I
believe he saw an opportunity to convince the public of his innocence. Convince
them it was he who enabled my demise. Win their trust and respect. Severus is
very keen on having respect. And of course, with having public respect comes
power."
Harry considered that, resting an elbow on the table and he stabbed at his
supper with his fork before taking a bite. It was good, and he took another
bite and another, and soon he almost forgot about Voldemort sitting across from
him as he enjoyed the fine meal.
Voldemort seemed to ignore Harry as well, and they both stayed silent as they
ate their supper.
After Harry finished, he stared at Voldemort for a while, taking in his pale,
snake-like features and how his long, white fingers handled the knife and fork
with care, cutting his food in tiny pieces before raising it to his mouth.
"Snape ambushed me in Godric's Hollow," Harry said. He wanted to know more
about what Snape had done, and how he had done it.
"On my orders."
Harry glared at Voldemort.
"He brought you to me. And I turned my back on him." Voldemort shook his head,
as though he couldn't believe he'd done that. "And I woke up here. With you."
Harry nodded, and lowered his gaze. "Why didn't you kill me?"
Voldemort put his knife and fork down, and got up from his chair. He placed his
hand against the invisible barrier, much like Dumbledore had done in the cave,
searching for some specific magical sign.
"Because these spells can only be broken with both our magic. Oh yes, Severus
was always clever like that. He of course hoped I'd kill you the first chance I
got, and that would leave me locked up in here forever."
"But you didn't," Harry whispered.
"No, I have more sense than that." Voldemort sat down again and continued his
meal. Harry stayed quiet, considering the things Voldemort had told him. Snape
had locked them up together, hoping Voldemort would kill him. But Voldemort
didn't seem very inclined to want to kill him, which made sense if he needed
Harry to get out of there.
"How much magic can you do without a wand?" Harry asked when Voldemort had
emptied his plate.
Voldemort pursed his lips, and then muttered something Harry didn't understand
and flicked his hand. The empty plate in front of him levitated, spun a time or
two and then lowered to the table again. "Some," Voldemort said with a slight
smirk. "But not nearly enough to break these spells. You?"
Harry shrugged.
Suddenly Voldemort vanished from his seat opposite Harry and instantly stood
beside Harry. "You can't even apparate?"
A sharp surge of pain burst from Harry's scar and he leaned back. "Get away
from me!"
Voldemort chuckled and disapparated back to his chair again.
"I can apparate," Harry said, and he concentrated hard on the doorway. A moment
later, he stood there, his body trembling in protest. He really did not like
apparating very much. "But I can't apparate out of this house," Harry said as
he walked back to his chair.
"I had noticed that much."
Harry rolled his eyes. "What more can you do?"
One moment, the kitchen was colored white, and the next, it seemed oddly red as
more pain seared through Harry's mind, followed by a distant voice letting out
cold laughter.
"Get out of my bloody mind!" Harry shouted, grabbing at his forehead. The pain
ebbed away and the world around him returned to normal.
"And it seems I can still possess other people," Voldemort said, smirking as he
leaned back in his chair.
"Don't you ever do that again," Harry said through gritted teeth. "You stay out
of my head or I will kill you."
"You can't kill me, Harry."
"Just stay away from me."
"That would be my pleasure," Voldemort said. "However, we do need to make a few
plans before I leave you alone."
"What plans? None of the magic you can do in here is going to get us out,"
Harry mumbled.
"Not at this moment, no. But there is magic to be found in the smallest of
things. One only needs to look."
Harry decided not to ask what the hell Voldemort meant by that. He wanted this
conversation to be over with as soon as possible.
"And of course, there are the sleeping arrangements that need to be discussed."
"There are two bedrooms," Harry said quickly. "You take one, I take one, end of
discussion."
"I think not," Voldemort replied evenly. "If we're both asleep at the same
time, we'll both be vulnerable. I suggest we share a room at night, and one of
us sleeps while the other one keeps watch."
Harry's mouth dropped open. "Share a room? Are you insane?"
"Hardly."
"I'm not sharing a room with you," Harry said, his heartbeat speeding up.
"Use that brain of yours and think, Potter," Voldemort snarled, looking as if
he was about to lose his patience. "This is about survival and clearly, you
don't know anything about the subject. If Severus changes his mind and decides
to pay us a visit during the night, we'll have a much bigger chance of
defeating him if one of us at least hears him coming. We're sharing a room and
we'll take turns keeping watch."
Harry opened his mouth, and closed it again when he couldn't think of anything
to say. He swallowed and bit his lip. "Fine," he said at last, and for the
umpteenth time that day wondered how on earth he'd landed himself in this
ridiculous situation. "What else?"
"Stay out of my way for the rest of the time and I think we'll get along
marvelously, Harry," Voldemort said, his voice tainted with sarcasm. "As for
right now, you can do the dishes."
Harry wanted to protest, but Voldemort stood up and left the kitchen without
saying another word. Harry stared after him for a moment and then took in the
dirty dishes. With a sigh, he got up and thought that doing the dishes would at
least give him something to do. For now.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
Harry spread the damp dishtowel out over the back of a chair, and opened the
refrigerator. It seemed well-stocked, with milk, eggs, bacon, fruit,
vegetables, and everything else to be found in the average refrigerator. Harry
reached for an apple and a carton of orange juice.
It seemed Snape had no intention of starving them, at least. That was, until
they ran out of food.
Sighing, Harry got a glass from one of the cabinets and sat down at the table.
He drained two glasses of orange juice, and then bit into his apple. He
grimaced at the initial sour taste, which passed after his second bite.
He was stuck in a house with Voldemort while his friends thought he was dead.
That thought had tormented Harry constantly while doing the dishes, and it
seemed that it wasn't about to go away now.
They were stuck, but Voldemort seemed to think they'd find a way out. And Harry
admitted that if anyone could do unexpected magic, it was Voldemort. They did
call him the most powerful wizard in the world, besides Dumbledore. Harry's
biggest worry was what Voldemort would do to him once they got out.
Harry crunched on a piece of apple, frowning. That didn't necessarily have to
be a problem. The moment the spells around the house fell, Harry could apparate
straight back to the Dursleys. And Voldemort couldn't harm him there, at least
according to Dumbledore.
But that meant Harry had to know the exact moment the spells were deactivated.
And he had no chance of knowing if he didn't keep an eye on Voldemort.
Voldemort could be breaking through them at that very moment.
Harry pushed his chair back, dropped his half-eaten apple in the bin, and went
in search of Voldemort. He found him in the sitting room, standing in front of
the high windows, the setting sun casting him in orange light.
"Come," Voldemort said, not looking at Harry. He had one hand pressed against
the invisible barrier Harry knew was there.
After patting his pocket to make sure his knife was still there, Harry crossed
the room and stood beside Voldemort.
"Touch it. Feel its magic."
Harry raised his hand, unsure what he was supposed to feel, and searched with
his fingers until he found the barrier. Warmth seeped into his hand, tingling
and teasing. Magic, Harry realized.
Voldemort withdrew his hand, and the warmth disappeared until only a vague
tingling in Harry's fingertips remained.
"It's gone," Harry said, giving Voldemort a confused glance.
"No, its magic is still there." Voldemort replaced his hand against the
barrier, and instantly the heat seeped back into Harry. "However, like I told
you before, it's designed to respond more strongly to our combined magic."
"Ah." Harry had to admit the warmth felt nice, familiar in a strange way.
"Now this should be interesting," Voldemort said, and reached for Harry's free
hand with his own. The moment Voldemort's fingers closed around Harry's a surge
of liquid fire shot up Harry's arm, so strong his knees buckled and he almost
lost his balance.
Harry tried to pry his hand from Voldemort's fingers, but Voldemort tightened
his grip.
"Push against it," Voldemort breathed. He glanced down at Harry, his red eyes
blazing. "Use your magic. Push."
Closing his eyes, Harry concentrated on the glowing pit in his stomach, his
magic, and forced it upwards, through his arm, his fingers, into the barrier.
Another flash of fire hit him in response, and the barrier pulsed against his
palm. More magic surged through him, from the barrier and from Voldemort's
hand, and Harry realized he'd just connected his own magic with Voldemort's.
And it felt so good, so warm, so overwhelming. His toes curled and his nostrils
flared, and it felt an awful lot like having an – no, Harry refused to think of
that in reference to Voldemort. And yet he had to admit he wouldn't mind if
they stayed connected like that for the rest of the evening.
And then Voldemort released his hand. Harry heard a moan, and after a second,
he was shocked to realize it was his.
"Good," Voldemort said, nodding. "We need to find a way to concentrate our
magic before we release it into the barrier."
"A wand?" Harry guessed.
"That's one possibility, but since both our wands have been snapped, we'll need
to find another way."
"Are there other ways?"
Voldemort nodded. "Let's try this experiment, to see how we can combine our
magic." Voldemort reached for Harry's hand again, and the moment his skin
touched Voldemort's cold fingers, the fire inside him was back.
"Give me your magic, Harry." Voldemort sounded breathless, and Harry stared
into his eyes, and pushed the heat back out through both arms, forcing it
inside the barrier and inside Voldemort.
"Yes, like that." Voldemort raised their hands, his narrow upper lip curling,
revealing clenched teeth. A surge of magic struck Harry, so powerful he swayed
on his feet, and then a bright, yellow flash sprung from their clasped hands.
It hit a painting across the wall, leaving it scorched and ripped once the
smoke cleared.
"Fuck," Harry gasped, unsure what had just happened. Voldemort released his
hand, and Harry felt strangely empty without the heat inside him.
Voldemort chuckled. "Just as I had expected. The barrier will allow us to
combine our magic, therefore making it possible to cast stronger wandless
magic."
Releasing the barrier, Harry blinked, trying to get his mind back under
control. They'd just done magic together. They'd just used the spell that kept
them inside the house to boost their own magic.
"So we can use the spell to destroy it?" Harry whispered.
"Yes, precisely." Voldemort stepped away from the window, and stood in the
middle of the room, gaze narrowed and unfocused. "Now all we need is a way to
focus our magic. Concentrate it."
Harry wiped across his forehead and found cold sweat. He was still trembling,
and he made his way to the couch on unsteady legs. Once he sat down, he
released a deep breath. He had just combined his magic with Voldemort, let
Voldemort use his magic. To say that Harry didn't trust Voldemort one bit was
an understatement, but at least now he knew Voldemort needed him, his magic, to
break the spell. That assured Voldemort wouldn't kill him anytime soon.
"Here," Voldemort said, and placed an empty glass on the coffee table. He
unscrewed the cap of a bottle, and poured an amber-colored drink in Harry's
glass. Then he filled a glass for himself, and sat down on the couch beside
Harry.
"What is it?" Harry scooted a little further away from Voldemort.
"Whisky." Voldemort sipped his glass. "At least Severus hasn't forgot my
tastes."
As Harry reached for his glass, he saw the Daily Prophet lying on the table. He
picked it up as well, and stared at the picture while he took a sip of the
whisky. It burned his lips and tongue, but it was a welcome addition to the
blaze of pure hatred that formed in Harry's stomach.
Snape had betrayed him. Not just once, when he'd killed Dumbledore, but twice
now.
"I'm going to kill him," Harry muttered, more to himself than to Voldemort.
"I'll shove one of his cauldrons right up his arse."
Voldemort made a disgusted face. "You're thinking like a Muggle," he said, and
made it sound like an accusation. "There are far worse things you can do to him
than merely shove a cauldron up his rectum."
Snorting, Harry took another sip of his whisky.
"You could spell one of his cauldrons, animate it, have it creep down slowly
over his head, suffocate him. It could take hours."
Harry actually rather liked the sound of that. "Or I could use a Sectumsempra
on his testicles."
"I'll drink to that," Voldemort said, and drained his glass. Harry mimicked
him, and had a brief coughing fit when some of the whisky went down the wrong
way. Voldemort seemed unconcerned by that, refilling first his own glass, and
then Harry's.
"He set this whole thing up," Harry said in a moment of clarity. "Snape did. He
had to have been preparing everything for weeks."
"Most likely, yes."
"Find a Muggle house that's remote. Cast those spells everywhere. Clean the
house of everything that could possibly help us do magic." Harry stared at
Snape's picture, wondering how no one had seen this kind of betrayal coming.
Snape must have been preparing it long before he even killed Dumbledore.
"Yes, this certainly testifies of Severus' strange sense of humor. Locking away
the most powerful wizard of all time in a Muggle house." Voldemort gave a loud
snort.
"Not so powerful without a wand," Harry muttered, and then wondered why he'd
said that aloud. Must be the whisky talking.
"Shall I demonstrate exactly what curses I can do without a wand, Harry?"
Voldemort narrowed his eyes, and Harry quickly shook his head. "Then I suggest
you keep your tongue in check."
Harry nodded, and stared at the picture again. "How did you get the Prophet?"
"It was lying on the kitchen table this morning, along with a box of food."
"Ah. So Snape's not going to let us starve?"
"I don't think so. It's not his style." Voldemort tilted his head, and gave
Harry an amused smile. "He might try to poison us, though that would have
little effect on me."
Harry's eyes widened.
"However, if he truly believes you're the only one who can kill me, he'll not
try to take your life." Voldemort sipped his whisky, and Harry tried not to
appear relieved. Dumbledore had certainly thought Harry was the one who could
kill Voldemort, but Harry didn't think Voldemort needed to know that.
He stared at the picture again, imagining Snape's smug face transforming into
an expression of pain, caused by Harry's perfect Cruciatus he knew he was going
to cast at Snape if he ever got the chance. He had enough hatred for the man to
make it work. And then his eye caught a few words above the picture: ...tragic
death of a young hero, who will forever be mourned...
Something got stuck in Harry's throat, and he quickly washed it away with a
gulp of whisky. His friends thought he was dead. Everyone thought he was dead.
Harry realized that the whisky had gone to his head, confusing him and allowing
him to feel sorry about his own death while in fact he was still very much
alive. He leaned back in the couch, staring up at the ceiling. Then a yawn took
control of his mouth.
"Perhaps you should get some sleep," Voldemort said. "I'll take watch for the
first half of the night."
"Yeah," Harry said, and then realized what he'd just agreed with. If sitting on
the couch with Voldemort was surreal, it had nothing on the idea of sleeping
while Voldemort kept watch over him. But Voldemort's reasoning seemed solid. If
Snape decided to pay them a visit, Harry wanted to hear him coming, too.
Voldemort rose from the couch, taking the bottle of whisky and his glass with
him as he strolled out the room. Harry got up as well, his mind dizzy with
whisky, and then followed Voldemort up the stairs to the small hallway.
"This room should do just fine." Voldemort entered the room Harry had spent the
night in, and Harry trailed behind him. But as he crossed the threshold, his
heart started beating faster and faster, his palms suddenly clammy. He did not
trust Voldemort not to kill him in his sleep.
Voldemort seemed to sense his reluctance, and turned around on his feet to look
at him. "I do believe I've demonstrated already that I have absolutely nothing
to gain by your death while we're locked up in this house."
Harry gave a faint nod.
"Well then, you may rest assured I'm not going to kill you, not until we break
this spell. And I need your magic to do that."
Snorting, Harry took another step inside the room. "And then you'll kill me,
anyway."
"Probably." Voldemort leered. "However, that is of no matter to our sleeping
arrangements for tonight."
Harry sighed. Voldemort had a point, and Harry was too tired to argue it. He
walked up to the bed, and then realized he only had the clothes he was wearing.
"You'll find a proper attire in the wardrobe," Voldemort said, rearranging one
of the nightstands in front of the window. "I discovered it while inspecting
this room earlier." And then Voldemort disappeared with a crack.
Pulling the wardrobe door open, Harry saw robes, Muggle clothing, underwear,
and striped pajamas. He picked up a pair, and quickly changed into it. Just as
he buttoned up the last of the buttons, Voldemort appeared again, with a large,
leather chair by his side. He placed it beside the nightstand, and with the
bottle of whisky in his hand, he lowered himself into the chair.
Harry stared at him for a moment, and then decided he might as well just go to
bed. The sheets felt cool and smelled fresh, and Harry pulled them up to his
chin, eyes focused on the ceiling. Voldemort flicked his hand, and the light
switch on the wall lowered, leaving the room in darkness.
Even though the whisky made him drowsy, and all the events of that day left him
exhausted, a thousand thoughts spun through Harry's mind, none of them making
any real sense. Snape had betrayed them, and his friends thought he was dead,
and he needed to play nice with fucking Voldemort to find a way out, and his
magic was useless without a wand, and he didn't think he'd ever felt that
helpless before.
A memory popped up between those swirling thoughts. Snape telling him he needed
to close his mind to keep Voldemort away from him. Harry tilted his head, and
saw Voldemort sitting in the chair near the foot of the bed, moonlight
filtering in through the cracks in the curtains casting him in a faint blue
glow. Snape telling Harry he needed to close his mind before going to sleep to
protect him from Voldemort, and now Harry was trying to sleep with Voldemort
sitting by his bed.
It was such a ludicrous thought, such a ridiculous idea, Harry burst out in
hysterical laughter.
Voldemort glanced at him. "I had no idea trying to sleep could be that
amusing."
Harry hiccuped. "No, it's just that, this whole situation is so stupid. So
fucking stupid."
Sipping his whisky, Voldemort made a vague sound of agreement.
And then something got stuck in Harry's throat again, and his eyes suddenly
prickled with tears. Harry turned his back to Voldemort, squeezing his eyes
shut, and he vowed never to drink whisky again.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
A hand shook Harry awake, and Harry batted it away, muttering, "No, Ron, don'
wanna gerrup yet."
"Wake up!" a cold voice said very close to Harry's ear. Harry snapped his eyes
open, and the first thing he saw was a pair of red eyes staring at him. A jolt
of pain shot from Harry's scar, and he wanted to scramble away until his mind
caught up with reality.
Voldemort had kept watch over him. And now it was apparently Harry's turn to
keep watch over Voldemort.
The alarm clock announced in glowing red figures it was a few minutes past four
in the morning. The room was illuminated by a small lamp on the nightstand
beside the leather chair. Harry blinked, trying to rid himself from the fog of
sleep in his mind, and noticed Voldemort was wearing only a dressing gown,
which revealed far too much wax-like, pale skin.
"I'm up." To demonstrate this, Harry sat up, and managed to swing his legs over
the side of the bed.
"Good. The house has been quiet all night. I don't expect any problems, but do
try to be on your guard." Voldemort untied his dressing gown just as Harry got
to his feet. The blue fabric spilled to the floor, and there was no way Harry
couldn't notice Voldemort was naked.
Snatching up his glasses, Harry hurried to the leather chair, keeping his eyes
away from the bed as he heard Voldemort settle under the sheets.
Well, it seemed that splitting your soul in seven pieces at least let you keep
your private bits. Harry snorted inwardly. He really did not need to know that
much about Voldemort.
When Voldemort lay still and quiet in the bed, Harry switched the lamp off.
Darkness enveloped him, and Harry drew his legs up into the chair. The leather
was still warm from Voldemort's body.
And now all Harry had to do was stay awake, and if Snape did show up, scream
bloody murder to wake Voldemort, because Voldemort knew a lot more wandless
magic than he did.
The house was quiet, and all Harry heard was his own irregular breaths, and
Voldemort's even breathing. What if Snape apparated inside the house? What if
he pushed the bedroom door open silently, wand poised to kill? What if Snape
was quicker with a curse than Harry was to wake Voldemort?
Harry reached for the nightstand, and switched the light back on. He swallowed,
and glanced to the bed. "Er...is it all right if I keep the light on?" he
whispered. When no response came, Harry concluded that Voldemort was already
asleep.
The light drove those worried thoughts from Harry's mind, and he settled on the
things that had bothered him all day. Harry's friends thought he was dead.
Snape had told them, and the whole world, that he'd been helping Dumbledore all
along. And Harry's friends would see Harry's dead body, and Voldemort's dead
body, and they'd believe Snape, wouldn't they?
Harry frowned. Ron and Hermione knew about the Horcruxes. They knew Harry could
only kill Voldemort after he'd destroyed all of them.
But what if Snape had told them he'd already destroyed them?
Harry sighed, and shifted in the chair. There was no way of knowing what Snape
had come up with and how much his friends believed. Harry liked to think
Hermione was clever enough to see through any deception, but if Hermione saw
Harry's dead body, would she still doubt what had happened? Surely she wouldn't
try to find Harry when she'd seen his corpse.
And that idea made Harry feel incredibly alone. He'd always had his friends on
his side. He'd always been able to count on them. Yes, they'd had their fights
throughout the years, but Harry had always known that if he ever were in any
real trouble, Ron and Hermione would do anything in their power to help him.
But now Harry was dead, at least to them. And they would mourn him, most
likely, and then they'd move on with their lives, and Harry would be left stuck
inside a house with Voldemort.
Harry glanced at the bed again. Voldemort seemed fast asleep. He could tiptoe
across the room, get his knife from his robes, and slice Voldemort's throat.
But what good would that do? Voldemort couldn't die, and Harry didn't like the
idea of being stuck inside a house with Voldemort's pissed off soul to haunt
him. Besides, he needed Voldemort to break through the spells. And, even though
Harry was loathe to admit it, it didn't seem fair to slice Voldemort's throat
in his sleep when he hadn't attempted to kill Harry when he'd been asleep
earlier.
No, everything in Harry's mind pointed in one horrible direction: he was stuck
with Voldemort, and for the time being, a truce between them seemed the wisest
choice to make.
Harry leaned his head on back of the chair, and stared at the ceiling.
***** Chapter 2 *****
"Wake up!"
Hands shook Harry so roughly, Harry's teeth clattered. He was awake at once,
and he opened his eyes, confused.
Voldemort stared down at him, eyes narrowed and thin lips pursed. "The
objective of keeping watch is to stay awake so you can hear any intruders enter
the house."
"I fell asleep, didn't I?" Harry said, unsure.
"Yes, you worthless child!"
Harry flinched. "Shit. Sorry. Didn't mean to."
"Useless words," Voldemort said, and turned on his heels, his blue dressing
gown billowing. "Find a way to stay awake from now on, or I will hex your
eyelids off."
"Yeah." Harry slid his glasses up his nose and got up from the chair. He found
a pair of slippers in the wardrobe, and he stepped into them before following
Voldemort out the room. They were slightly too big, but it was better than
nothing.
A box filled with food and drinks sat on the kitchen table, and beside it lay a
copy of the Daily Prophet. They both leaned over to read the front page. Harry
didn't really care he was standing right next to Voldemort. He now knew
Voldemort wasn't going to kill him, and he did want to know what other lies
Snape had come up with.
'PREPARATIONS FOR FUNERAL OF THE CENTURY ARE UNDERWAY'
Harry sighed, and Voldemort gave a loud snort.
"Where are they going to bury me, anyway?" Harry mumbled, and skimmed through
the article. Godric's Hollow, as it turned out. "It doesn't mention your
burial."
"I'm quite sure my body has already been incinerated by now," Voldemort said,
and Harry couldn't argue with that. He read a few more lines of the article –
all poetic waxing over how beautiful his funeral was going to be – and then he
noticed a smaller article at the bottom of the page.
'AUROR AND FIANCE FOUND DEAD IN FLAT'
Harry swallowed, and read the first couple of lines.
Auror Nymphadora Tonks and her fiancé Remus John Lupin were found dead in Ms
Tonks' London flat late last night. Evidence shows they were the victims of a
brutal attack, which caused them severe physical injuries...
Harry couldn't read more, and he took a step back as his breath got stuck in
his throat.
"Fenrir Greyback," was all Voldemort said. There was no emotion in his voice,
and Harry wanted to punch him for it.
First Sirius. Then Dumbledore. And now Tonks and Lupin.
"This is all your fucking fault!" Harry felt fury explode in his chest as he
turned to look at Voldemort.
"Was it my wand that struck them dead? No? Then I suggest you keep your mouth
shut." Voldemort sounded impatient, but Harry was too angry to really notice
it.
"These people were my friends!"
"No, these people are casualties of war," Voldemort said, eyes narrowing as he
took a step closer to Harry.
"You don't know anything about friends. You only have servants who stab you in
your back the first chance they get." Before Harry could say more to vent his
anger and grief, Voldemort grabbed the front of Harry's pajamas, raised Harry
off the floor, and smashed him against the invisible barrier. Voldemort mumbled
something, and Harry felt fire burst through him, right before his body went
slack.
Voldemort stepped back and, as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened,
walked towards the refrigerator.
And Harry tried to move, tried to pry himself off the barrier, but his body
refused to do anything he wanted it to. He couldn't even talk. Voldemort had
magically glued him to the barrier, his feet dangling in the air. Glancing to
his side Harry saw Voldemort take eggs, bacon, and butter from the fridge and
make his way to the stove.
"You have to understand, Harry," Voldemort said as he reached for a frying pan,
"that I need you alive to help break the spell. But I can keep you alive in
many different ways. It's up to you how you're going to spend your time in this
house."
Harry blinked.
Not looking at him, Voldemort lit the fire on the stove, and broke three eggs
in the pan. "I'm more than willing to set our...differences aside for the time
being. However, if you're going to behave like an uncontrolled teenager, I'll
gladly keep you immobilized for as long as it takes me to find a way to end
that spell." Voldemort reached for a spatula, and glanced at Harry. "Is that
clear?"
Harry blinked a few times in a row to say that yes, it was perfectly clear.
"Then I'll release you," Voldemort said, replacing the spatula on the counter.
"Behave like that one more time, and I will make your life here miserable."
Voldemort pressed his hand against Harry's chest. Heat seeped into Harry, and
Harry got control back over his body. He slumped to the floor, reaching for one
of the chairs to keep himself upright.
"Do you want breakfast?" Voldemort asked, walking back to the stove.
"No. I've lost my appetite." Harry glanced at the newspaper, and felt his
stomach turn. "But why? Snape got what he wanted already, didn't he?"
"These were members of Dumbledore's Order, were they not?"
Harry wasn't sure what to say to that. He didn't want to tell Voldemort
anything about the Order, but then again, Tonks and Remus were dead, so it
didn't really matter anymore what he told Voldemort about them. "Yeah," he
whispered, his throat dry.
"Then this is a perfectly logical strategy," Voldemort said, and continued
scrambling the eggs over the fire.
Harry got a carton of orange juice and a glass, and sat down at the kitchen
table, feeling numb and defeated. "How so?"
"Because Dumbledore's followers could argue the tale Severus told the world.
They could discover the truth. Severus is merely eliminating any possible
threats to his scheme. A clever strategy indeed."
Sipping his juice, Harry considered that. And he didn't like the direction his
thoughts were taking one bit. "You mean, he'll try to kill others, too?"
"Yes. Anyone who can debunk his version of the story. He'll pick them off one
by one, or as in this case, pair by pair."
Closing his eyes, Harry leaned back in his chair. "Everyone close to
Dumbledore? Everyone in the Order?"
"And everyone close to you, Harry." Voldemort looked at Harry over his
shoulder. "It's the only way Severus can ensure the truth will never come out."
"God," Harry gasped, because there were a dozen names and faces swirling
through his mind. Snape was going to kill them all. His friends. Everyone in
the Order. Harry's stomach turned again, and Harry shoved his chair back and
fled the kitchen. He ran upstairs, burst into the bathroom, and fell to his
knees in front of the toilet. His stomach heaved, but not much came out, and
Harry sat like that, hands curled around the toilet seat, for a long time.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
The shower didn't wash away any of the names or faces that kept intruding on
Harry's thoughts. Nor did the hot water drive the chill from Harry's bones.
Snape was going to kill them all. Each and every one of those faces in his
mind's eye. And there was nothing Harry could do about it.
Harry dried himself with a fresh towel, scrubbing so hard he left most of his
skin reddened. But that didn't stop the despair from coiling inside Harry,
either. Towel wrapped around his hips Harry walked back to the bedroom, where
he found Voldemort selecting a black robe from the wardrobe.
Ignoring Voldemort, Harry stood in front of the window and stared outside until
he heard Voldemort leave the room. Then he gathered clean clothes for himself
and got dressed. His arms and legs felt heavy, and it cost Harry a lot more
energy than usual to pull on boxers and jeans and a shirt.
The clothes fit a lot better than Dudley's hand-me-downs had ever done, but
that tiny comfort did nothing to easy Harry's thoughts. Sighing, he glanced
around the room and decided he might as well make the bed.
It seemed strange he and Voldemort had shared the same bed. Just like it still
seemed strange he and Voldemort could actually be in the same room together
without any attempted murder.
They needed to find a way out of the house quickly, or Harry wouldn't have any
friends left.
And when the bloody hell had he and Voldemort become they?
Voldemort was the enemy. Voldemort had killed his parents. Voldemort had tried
to kill Harry, over and over again.
But Snape was killing Harry's friends.
Harry stared down at the sheets, and ripped them off the bed in a burst of
furious helplessness. He threw them to the floor and slammed the pillows
against the far wall, and then he stood there, panting.
Snape was going to kill his friends and there was nothing Harry could do to
stop him.
Harry stood there for a long time, numb and exhausted and terrified. Then the
door creaked open, revealing Voldemort in black robes. He smelled like shaving
lotion, and that spicy scent was strangely comforting. It reminded Harry of
Sirius and Lupin, who'd smelled like that in Grimmauld Place.
Sirius and Lupin were dead.
"Make that bed," Voldemort said. "Then join me downstairs. We need to test the
spell again."
Harry didn't have the energy to protest, to tell Voldemort he could bloody well
make his own bed. Voldemort closed the door, and Harry stared at the heap of
crumpled sheets.
He made the bed again, though this time it was a half-hearted attempt, but when
he was done at least the pillows were back in place and the sheets were spread
out across the mattress. If Voldemort wasn't satisfied by that, he could make
the bed from now on.
Harry trudged down the stairs and found Voldemort in the living room, standing
in the same spot as the previous night, in front of the high windows.
"Come," Voldemort said, and Harry went willingly, no longer uncertain what
Voldemort wanted of him. He placed one hand against the barrier and offered his
other hand to Voldemort, who took it, and then hot, welcome fire burned all
Harry's fears away.
Harry welcomed that heat, that mind-numbing magic that made his knees buckle
and his skin tingle.
It was much better than the numbness he'd felt before.
Closing his eyes, Harry leaned against the barrier and kept his fingers closed
around Voldemort's, and he just absorbed the magic, because it was all there
was.
"Harry, do you know any snowy owls?"
Harry snapped his eyes open and stared at Voldemort. "What?"
Releasing Harry's hand, Voldemort nodded his head towards the yard. "There's a
snowy owl in that pine tree, staring at us."
"Hedwig!" The idea of Hedwig having found him filled Harry with such relief, he
hardly missed the magical heat now that Voldemort had broken their connection.
"That's my owl!"
And it was Hedwig. She spread her wings, and soared towards the house.
"Hedwig!" Harry tried to bang his fist against the window, but all he felt was
the barrier.
"Tell her to turn back now," Voldemort said, narrowing his eyes.
"What?" Harry briefly glanced at Voldemort. "Of course not. I'll try to tell
her to go to one of my friends."
"Don't be stupid!" Voldemort snapped. "This house is most certainly not only
protected on the inside!"
"Oh." Harry's eyes widened as he saw Hedwig flying closer and closer. "Oh,
shit. Hedwig! Go back!" He tried to pound his fist against the window in sheer
desperation. "Go back. Go to Hermione. Please!"
But Hedwig didn't seem to understand what he was saying, and she flapped her
wings and flew closer still. When she was only a few feet away from the window,
a green flash lit up around her, and she dropped straight down to the grass.
"Hedwig!" Harry tried to claw his way through the barrier, ice-cold fear
gripping his heart. "Hedwig!"
But Hedwig didn't move. Her body lay still on the grass, her head tilted back
and wings spread out.
"Hedwig!"
"She's dead," Voldemort said, and Harry wanted to scream at him that she
couldn't be dead. But if she wasn't dead, then why wasn't she moving?
Inhaling ragged breaths, Harry slumped against the barrier, eyes fixed on
Hedwig's lifeless body. Why wasn't she moving? Why wasn't she flapping her
wings to try to get up?
Voldemort stood still beside Harry, his thin lips pursed. But all Harry could
do was stare at Hedwig and hope she'd only been knocked out for a little while.
"I can only imagine what Severus has done to Nagini by now," Voldemort said,
and then walked out of the room.
And it took Harry a few moments to realize Voldemort had spoken those words in
parseltongue.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
Harry spent the rest of the day in front of the living room window. At first he
stood, staring at Hedwig's body, but as the day went on, his legs grew heavy
and his back started to ache, so eventually, Harry slid to the floor.
Drawing his knees up and hooking his arms around his legs, Harry sat and stared
outside. He watched the sun sink in the sky, the shadows move across the lawn,
and the summer wind dance through the soft feathers on Hedwig's chest. She
didn't move, and when flies started gathering around her body Harry was forced
to conclude that she was dead.
The emptiness that swallowed him did help Harry evaluate the situation he was
in. Feeling numb kept his emotions, the grief and anger and fury, at bay, and
Harry examined every possibility there was to dealing with the strange,
horrifying twist his life had taken.
He could kill himself. If he killed himself, Voldemort would be stuck inside
that house forever, and Harry would save the world. Sort of. But if he killed
himself, Snape would still be out there, hunting his friends. If he killed
himself there was no one left who knew the truth and could stop Snape.
So killing himself wasn't an option.
He needed to escape. He needed to find a way to stop Snape, and he could only
do that if he got out of that bloody house. And to get out of the house, he
needed Voldemort.
Voldemort wanted to kill him the moment the spell broke. And Harry wanted to
kill Voldemort, too.
But if Voldemort tried to kill him, and Harry tried to kill Voldemort, Snape
would still be out there. Killing Voldemort just didn't seem as important
anymore now that there was a new enemy lurking around the corner, set on
killing everyone Harry cared for.
Snape had already killed Dumbledore, Tonks and Lupin. And Hedwig, Harry's
second real friend in the wizarding world. A present from his first real
friend, Hagrid.
And Harry didn't want to have to add names to that mental list. Harry didn't
even want to consider the possibility of Snape going after Ron and Hermione and
Ginny, and everyone else.
The sun slowly disappeared behind the trees in the distance, and Harry heard
vague sounds coming from the kitchen, followed by the smell of supper cooking.
But Harry wasn't hungry or thirsty. He was too numb to care about food.
When darkness had set completely, and Hedwig's body had disappeared from
Harry's view, Voldemort walked into the living room. He stopped beside Harry,
and without saying a word, he drew the curtains shut. And Harry didn't object,
but he didn't move either.
"You've been there long enough," Voldemort said, staring down at Harry. "Go to
bed."
Harry snorted, and wondered if he should tell Voldemort he sounded like a
bloody parent scolding their child. But that thought was too foreign and too
painful, so Harry only nodded and pushed himself to his feet. He made his way
out of the room and up the stairs with slow, tired steps, and Voldemort
followed him up, turning off the lights behind them.
Inside the bedroom, Voldemort settled in the leather chair and poured himself a
drink from the bottle of whisky he'd left there the previous night. Harry
turned his back to Voldemort, changed into his striped pajamas, and crawled
under the sheets. The moment he pulled the sheets up Voldemort switched off the
light, and Harry heard the leather creaking as Voldemort made himself more
comfortable.
The darkness seemed soothing, easing Harry's mind towards voicing the decision
he'd already made.
"I want to make a deal," he said, glancing at the vague, dark-blue figure near
the window.
Voldemort turned the light back on and stared at Harry. "What kind of deal?"
"That when we find a way out of here, we won't try to kill each other until
after we kill Snape."
Voldemort's eyes widened for a second, and then he gave Harry a thin smile.
"But what about the prophecy, Harry? You can't expect me to ignore fate itself,
now can you?"
"About the prophecy," Harry said, sitting up in the bed. He thought of
Dumbledore, of all the things Dumbledore had told him over the past year. But
Dumbledore was dead now. "It's bullshit," Harry whispered, and he closed his
eyes, feeling as though he'd just betrayed Dumbledore even in death.
The chair creaked, and a moment later, the mattress dipped. Voldemort sat down
beside him, leaning back against the headboard, glass and bottle in his hands.
"Talk."
Sighing, Harry snatched the bottle of whisky from Voldemort's hand and took a
gulp. The liquor burned away his reluctance, and Harry was grateful for it.
"The prophecy only means something because we act on it," Harry said, and took
another gulp.
"The prophecy spoke of the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord,"
Voldemort said, frowning at Harry.
"Yeah, but if you hadn't acted on it, I never would have become what I am."
Harry made a vague gesture towards his forehead.
"According to whom?"
"According to Dumbledore."
Voldemort leaned his head against the wall, and downed his glass in one gulp.
Then he held it out to Harry, who refilled it and took another swig of whisky
from the bottle.
"But that was only part of the prophecy," Harry continued, his voice soft. "The
rest is about one of us having to kill the other. But the strange thing is, we
don't have to act on it. If we don't act on it, if we decide not to kill each
other, the prophecy will simply be a worthless prediction. That's how
Dumbledore explained it."
"So you're saying if I hadn't tried to kill you all those years ago, the
prophecy wouldn't have come true? And if we decide not to kill each other now,
there will be no consequences?"
"Yeah," Harry whispered. He sipped the bottle again, and started feeling warm
from the alcohol. "Of course, I'm quite sure that once we get out of here and
we continue to do the things we do, we will come to a confrontation eventually.
But we can postpone it as long as we like."
"And you wish to postpone it?"
Harry nodded, and looked up at Voldemort. "I want to see Snape dead. I want to
kill him. So I want to make a deal with you. We get out of here, but we don't
go after each other. Not right away. We go after Snape first."
"Hmm." Voldemort narrowed his eyes. "And simply having my word I won't kill you
right away is enough for you?"
"Er..." Harry hadn't actually considered that part of the deal yet. "No."
Chuckling, Voldemort sipped from his glass.
"Perhaps we can make an Unbreakable Vow?"
Voldemort choked on his whiskey, and coughed. "An Unbreakable Vow? Are you mad,
child? I will not put my life at risk for your desire to get revenge." He
inhaled a deep breath. "Besides, you need a wand and a Bonder to cast one."
"Oh," Harry said. Perhaps Voldemort was right. It seemed a bit much to put
their lives on the line to swear to kill Snape before they tried killing each
other.
"However, I think we can manage a simple Magical Vow."
"What does it do?"
"It will prohibit you to do the things we'll agree on. If I agree not to kill
you before we kill Severus, I will be unable to raise my wand or any other
weapon at you with the intention to take your life."
Harry nodded. That sounded like the sort of confirmation he needed to make a
deal with Voldemort. "We need magic for it?"
"Yes, but I believe we can use the barrier for that. And we'll need our blood
to seal the bond."
Swallowing, Harry stared at his lap. A voice in his mind, which sounded a lot
like Hermione, told him taking a vow like that with Voldemort, one that
involved blood, perhaps wasn't the best of ideas. Harry quickly took another
gulp of whisky to silence that voice.
"Come," Voldemort said, and rose from the bed. He stood in front of the window,
drew the curtains back, drained the last of his whisky, and then smashed the
glass on the windowsill. Harry joined him there, and accepted the shard of
glass Voldemort offered him.
"Like so." Voldemort cut across the palm of his right hand, creating a large,
bloody gash. Harry mimicked him, and winced as the glass cut into his flesh.
Then Voldemort offered Harry his bleeding hand, and Harry took it, pressing his
bloodied palm against Voldemort's.
Nothing happened until Voldemort pressed their hands against the barrier.
Familiar heat flushed inside Harry, hotter around their clasped hands, which
glowed a faint pink against the night's sky.
"Now what?" Harry asked.
"Now you name your conditions for the Magical Vow."
Harry inhaled a deep breath. "You will not try to kill me in any way before we
kill Snape."
"I swear I will not kill you or try to kill you before we kill Severus Snape,"
Voldemort said carefully, and their hands glowed bright pink for a moment. "You
will not try to kill me, or take any preparations or actions to end my life
before we kill Severus Snape."
Harry swallowed. Did Voldemort suspect he knew of the Horcruxes? It sounded
like it. But Harry decided it didn't really matter. "I swear I will not try to
kill you, or take any preparations or actions to end your life before we kill
Severus Snape."
Again, the pink light around their hands glowed brightly, and Harry trembled as
more fire burned inside him.
"And thus I, Lord Voldemort, born Tom Marvolo Riddle, take this Magical Vow,"
Voldemort said, and nodded at Harry to repeat those words.
"And thus I, Harry James Potter, take this Magical Vow."
A bright pink flash enveloped their hands, and then the glow disappeared
entirely. Voldemort pulled their hands back and released Harry. Turning his
palm up, Harry stared at the large pink scar now marking his flesh.
"It's the evidence of our vow. It will not disappear until we've killed Severus
Snape," Voldemort said, and showed Harry the similar pink scar on his own palm.
"Okay," Harry said, lowering his hand. "So now we really can't kill each
other?"
Voldemort's lips curved up in a sly smile, and before Harry could stop him,
Voldemort reached for one of the shards of glass and made a slashing motion
towards Harry's throat. But before the glass touched Harry's skin, Voldemort's
arm stopped abruptly.
Harry inhaled a startled breath, staring into Voldemort's narrowed eyes.
Voldemort looked amused.
"Try it," Voldemort said, and handed the shard to Harry.
Gritting his teeth, Harry made to slice Voldemort's throat wide open, but
before the shard could cut through Voldemort's flesh Harry's arm stopped, as
though invisible hands were holding him back.
"Wow," Harry said, staring at his own arm with wide eyes.
Voldemort smirked, and pushed Harry's arm down. "Satisfied?"
"Yeah."
"Good. Now go to bed. We'll continue to try to break the spell tomorrow."
Harry crawled back under the sheets as Voldemort reclaimed his seat near the
window, and the combination of the lingering heat from their combined magic and
the warmth of the whisky inside him lulled Harry quickly to sleep.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
"Wake up, Harry."
This time when Harry opened his eyes he remembered where he was and who he was
with.
"I'm up," Harry said, blinking a few times. Voldemort's tall figure, wearing
the blue dressing gown, slowly came into view. Harry sat up, reached for his
glasses, and saw it was four in the morning. Then he forced himself out of bed,
and he slipped past Voldemort before the dressing gown fell to the floor.
On the nightstand in front of the window stood a mug and a flask, and Harry
recognized the strong scent coming from the steaming mug.
"You made coffee?" he asked, surprised.
"Well, yes," Voldemort said, sliding between the sheets. "It was either that or
staple your eyelids to your forehead. I would have preferred to do the latter,
but I couldn't find a stapler."
Harry stared at Voldemort for a moment, and then released a nervous snort of
laughter. Voldemort shot him an amused smile, and lay his head on the pillow.
"Thanks," Harry whispered, and sat down in the chair.
"I hope for your sake that it'll work," Voldemort muttered, and shifted under
the sheets one last time before his body stilled.
Harry sipped from the mug. The coffee was hot and strong, and while Harry had
never really liked coffee, he did think it would help him stay awake until
morning. Or at least he hoped it would, because he did not want to test
Voldemort's patience with him.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
Harry did stay awake throughout the night. He drank the entire flask of coffee,
and tried not to become bored out of his mind. Which was difficult, so Harry
turned watching Lord Voldemort sleep into his new favorite activity.
There wasn't much else to do besides taking the occasional trip to the
bathroom, which proved the highlight of Harry's sleepless night.
Voldemort looked very peaceful in his sleep. He hardly moved, save for a turn
of his head or his shoulder, his breathing stayed deep and even, and his smooth
skin was almost as white as the sheets. And every now and then his eyes moved
behind his eyelids, and Harry wondered what he was dreaming about.
Harry's own dreams had been both promising and surreal. He vaguely remembered
standing in front of Hogwarts, Voldemort by his side, and they held hands as
they raised their wands at Snape. Harry supposed it was simply his subconscious
dealing with the Magical Vow he'd made with Voldemort.
What was that saying again? The enemy of my enemy is my friend. Right. Harry
didn't think of Voldemort as a friend, but he was forced to admit that with the
Magical Vow in place, Voldemort had become an ally. A powerful ally, one who
could and would help Harry kill Snape. And that was all that mattered to Harry
at that moment. After they dealt with Snape, Harry would focus on his fight
against Voldemort again.
The sun rose outside, and Harry wondered when Voldemort would wake up, or if he
should wake him. But Voldemort hadn't asked him to, so Harry figured he'd best
let him sleep all he wanted.
A few minutes past nine, Voldemort stirred, rolling on his back and blinking
his eyes open.
"I'm still awake!" Harry threw his arms up in a victorious gesture.
"So I hear." Voldemort's voice sounded raspy, and Harry chuckled at how bleary
Voldemort looked.
"And now I have to piss. Again." Harry rushed out of the room and into the
bathroom, and relieved himself for the umpteenth time that morning. And just as
he rinsed his hands in the basin, Voldemort strolled in, dressing gown hanging
open around his thin body. And as Harry glanced at him, he noticed that despite
its slightly inhuman appearance, Voldemort's body still seemed to function like
any other male in the morning.
Feeling his cheeks flush Harry fled the bathroom, but he halted at the top of
the stairs. He wasn't sure what he'd find in the kitchen that morning, and that
thought scared him. But before Harry could gather enough courage to dispose of
that sudden fear Voldemort walked past him, and Harry followed him down the
stairs, pleased to notice Voldemort had closed his dressing gown.
Inside the kitchen, they found a new box with food and drinks, and a new copy
of the Daily Prophet. Harry lingered in the doorway while Voldemort stepped up
to the table and read the headlines.
"They're burying you today," Voldemort said matter-of-factly.
"Ah." Harry shuffled closer to the table. "Any other news?"
"Two Aurors were killed."
Harry's heart sank, and he glanced around Voldemort at the small article on the
front page.
'TWO AURORS DIE IN BATTLE WITH FUGITIVE DEATH EATERS'
Aurors Alastor 'Mad Eye' Moody and Kingsley Shacklebolt were killed yesterday
when a team of Aurors discovered the hideout of five fugitive Death Eaters.
Three Death Eaters – identified as Fenrir Greyback, Alecto Carrows and her
brother Amycus Carrows – were killed in the fight as well. The other two Death
Eaters fled before they could be apprehended, and their identities remain
unknown...
"Clever Severus," Voldemort said, and Harry looked up at him in confusion.
"Greyback and the Carrows were there at Hogwarts the night Severus killed
Dumbledore," Voldemort continued, sounding displeased. "I'm certain Severus led
them straight to those Aurors. He might have even cursed them in the back
himself after he disposed of Moody and Shacklebolt."
"So he's erasing his tracks on both sides?"
"Precisely."
Sighing, Harry stared at the article again, though the letters blurred. Two
more names to add to his mental list. Two more people he knew were dead.
No. He couldn't afford to have grief overpower him again. He had no time to
give into the emptiness he'd felt the day before. He had to keep himself
focused.
Harry shoved the Prophet away and instead busied himself with unloading the box
of food. Voldemort opened the fridge and carried several things to the counter.
"Do you want breakfast?"
"Yes, please," Harry said. He was quite hungry, even though his stomach had
filled with grief. He hadn't had anything to eat the previous day. He took milk
and orange juice out of the box, and then wrinkled his nose.
"Yuck. I hate broccoli."
Voldemort glanced at Harry over his shoulder. "I don't much care for it,
either. Throw it out."
Harry laughed, and it seemed wrong to do so with two more deaths to mourn, but
laughing about broccoli at least kept his mind from chanting Dumbledore, Tonks,
Lupin, Moody, Shacklebolt over and over again.
"And here I thought we'd have nothing in common," Harry said, throwing the
broccoli in the bin. He felt pleased when Voldemort gave a snort of laughter.
Talking and laughing about bloody broccoli was good. It kept the pulsing pain
that tried to settle inside Harry's chest away.
                                   *~*~*~*~*
After breakfast, Voldemort announced he was going to get showered and dressed,
and he left Harry to do the dishes. Which wasn't an unfair deal, Harry thought,
since Voldemort had cooked. Of course, when Harry went to fill the sink, he
found the dirty dishes from the previous day there as well. It seemed Voldemort
thought it was Harry's job to clean up after him.
But Harry didn't complain and just did the work, because it kept him busy, and
keeping busy was better than letting his mind slip into a state of continuous
thoughts of his dead friends.
When Voldemort came downstairs a while later, Harry was finished in the
kitchen, so he decided to go wash up.
It was a simple morning routine, perfect for keeping busy. And as Harry took a
shower and brushed his teeth and brushed his hair, he refused to think about
Tonks and Lupin and Hedwig and Moody and Shacklebolt. There was no use in
thinking about them while he was locked up and couldn't do anything about it.
Best to just keep busy.
Harry got dressed, then made the bed, and then checked the hamper in the
bathroom. There was enough laundry to run a load in the washing machine. So
Harry gathered it up and made his way to the small laundry room. Aunt Petunia
had made him wash his own clothes since he was old enough to press the right
buttons on the machine, so it only took Harry a few minutes to figure out how
to work this washing machine.
There was a vacuum cleaner tucked away beside the dryer, he noticed. Harry
dragged it to the bedroom, figuring that the floor could do with a bit of
vacuuming. The repetitive movement and the dull noise made it easier not to
think of those names and faces that wanted to take over his mind.
Patronus lessons with Lupin in his third year. Tonks helping him pack before
Harry moved to Grimmauld Place for the first time. Moody showing Harry a
picture of the original Order. Kingsley fighting bravely at the Department of
Mysteries. Hagrid buying Hedwig for him, his first real birthday present. All
the times Hedwig had nipped his fingers.
Harry gritted his teeth, and forced the vacuum cleaner around faster. He was
not thinking about those things. Because it was no use. He was no use.
No use. No use. No use.
After he'd vacuumed their bedroom at least twice, Harry moved to the hallway
and vacuumed it, too. Then he made his way down the stairs, the vacuum cleaner
following him obediently as Harry cleaned every step. The downstairs hallway
was next, followed by the kitchen, and then the living room.
Voldemort stood in front of the window, one hand on the invisible barrier, and
he glanced at Harry over his shoulder. Harry ignored the curious look Voldemort
gave him, and set to vacuuming the room with a vengeance. But he didn't go near
the window. Not because Voldemort stood there, but because Harry knew what he'd
see on the other side of the glass.
Hedwig. Dead.
No use. No use. No use.
Harry vacuumed the dining room next, and then the conservatory, even though
neither of them had really used those rooms. And then there was nothing left to
vacuum.
He carried the vacuum cleaner back to the laundry room. The washing machine was
halfway through its cycle. Harry sighed, and decided that the bathroom could do
with some cleaning.
He had to keep busy. Because if he didn't keep busy he'd go mad.
Lupin, Tonks, Hedwig, Moody, Shacklebolt.
No.
Harry filled the basin with water, and wiped the porcelain and the mirror. He
cleaned out the shower stall and ran his cleaning cloth over the toilet. If he
hadn't hesitated that dreadful night in his fourth year, if Cedric and he had
taken action when they had the chance, Voldemort would have never returned and
none of this would have happened.
No. No use.
And then the bathroom was clean, and Harry was at a loss as to what to do next.
He checked the washing machine. It wasn't done yet.
He returned to their bedroom, and smoothed the covers on their bed a few times.
Then he rearranged the clothes in the wardrobe. If he hadn't left the Dursleys'
on his own, none of this would have happened. If he'd kept his promise to Ron
and Hermione, to not go searching for the Horcruxes without them, his friends
would still be alive.
No. No use.
He checked the washing machine again. It was done, and he stuffed the damp
clothes into the dryer and turned it on.
And then he couldn't think of anything else to do.
Harry stood in the hallway, staring at the stairs. He felt twitchy, as though
his body demanded he do something, anything, to keep his mind from caving. He
wished he had his broom. He wished he could go outside and fly for the rest of
the day, fly until the sun set and then fly some more until it was time to go
to bed.
His body started moving as though Harry had no control over it. Harry ran down
the stairs and through the hallway until he reached the invisible barrier in
front of the door. Then he turned around and ran back upstairs, all the way to
the end of the hallway. He turned around and ran downstairs as fast as he
could, his feet banging down the steps.
And back up again.
And back down again.
Faster.
Faster. Faster. Faster.
And then just as Harry rushed down the stairs, Voldemort stepped out of the
living room, knife in one hand and something glittering in the other. Harry
couldn't stop, and he crashed into Voldemort. He lost his balance and stumbled
to the side.
Something cracked beneath his left shoe.
Harry slumped against the wall, and blinked as he slid his glasses up his nose.
Voldemort stared at the floor for a few seconds, and then raised his narrowed
gaze to Harry's face.
"You incompetent, useless, little half-blood!"
Harry flinched at the pure fury he heard in Voldemort's voice. He glanced down
at the shattered pieces of something that looked like glass.
"I just spent an hour prying that crystal from a candlestick, and you just
managed to ruin perhaps our only chance of escape from this house!"
Swallowing, Harry glanced up again. "Can't you just fix it? You know wandless
magic."
"No, I can't just fix it, you ignorant fool! A crystal needs to be pure for it
to concentrate magic! It can't be tampered with!"
"I – I'm sorry," Harry whispered.
"Oh, you will be." Voldemort backhanded Harry across his face, and again, and
again. Harry's glasses flew to the side, and fell to the stone floor, one of
the lenses cracking in three pieces. Harry tasted blood in his mouth and his
cheek burned. And then Voldemort raised the knife he was still holding and made
to jab it in Harry's throat, but his hand stilled just before the metal touched
Harry's skin.
The Magical Vow.
Voldemort had wanted to kill him.
Harry stared into Voldemort's blazing red eyes for a few moments, and then
turned on his feet and fled upstairs. He rushed inside their bedroom, threw the
door shut, and leaned against it, much as he'd done the first night.
Voldemort had just tried to kill him. Because Harry had broken a crystal. A
crystal that would have helped them escape.
His eyes falling shut, Harry leaned his head against the door. He wanted to
hurt himself. He wanted to hurt himself like Voldemort had done. He'd ruined a
good chance of escape.
And why?
Because he wasn't able to deal with the deaths of his friends? Because he'd
allowed himself to lose control?
Voldemort was right. He was incompetent and useless.
Harry licked his lips, and felt blood trickling from the corner of his mouth.
He touched it with the tip of his finger, and then examined the red stain on
his pale skin. He turned towards the wall beside the door, and traced a bloody
line down the white wallpaper.
That was for Lupin.
He swiped more blood from the corner of his mouth, and added another line. For
Tonks. And another. For Hedwig. One more. For Moody. And the last one. For
Shacklebolt.
Five blood sacrifices for five friends Harry hadn't been able to help. Five
smudges of blood on a pristine white wall, five admissions of Harry's
impatience and incompetence.
Harry stared at them, licking across his lips and tasting salt and copper on
his tongue.
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