Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/313482. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Harry_Potter_-_J._K._Rowling Relationship: Regulus_Black/Sirius_Black Character: Regulus_Black, Sirius_Black Additional Tags: Sibling_Incest, Incest Stats: Published: 2009-11-21 Words: 3023 ****** So I Guess This Is Goodbye ****** by thilia Summary Before he leaves home forever, Sirius needs to take care of something. Notes Written for hp_toujours 2009 on LJ. Carelessly, Sirius threw his robes into the open suitcase on his bed, followed by a number of personal items he didn't want to leave behind. Scowling, he shoved his schoolbooks into his trunk, his mouth a tight line. He was aware of the figure standing in the doorway but he didn't pay his brother any attention. He knew that if he looked at him now, saw the look of disappointment in his brother's eyes, he would fail. He didn't want to leave Regulus behind; his younger brother was the only member of his family Sirius could stand being around. But he knew that he couldn't stay here any longer; too much had happened. He knew he wasn't welcome here anymore. "So I guess this is goodbye." Regulus's soft voice broke the silence after a moment and for the briefest moment, Sirius hesitated. Could he do it? Could he leave his brother with these... these freaks? The moment was over faster than it had come and he continued stuffing his trunk with the few things he would take to James's. He closed it, then took a deep breath and finally turned to face his brother, knowing that he would have to explain it to him. Or, at the very least, he would have to say goodbye. He didn't want to cut Regulus out of his life; only the rest of his family. Regulus's eyes were shimmering with unshed tears and Sirius's heart sank. "Please don't go," Regulus whispered, his voice breaking a little, and before Sirius knew what he was doing, he crossed the room and wrapped his arms around Regulus, burying his face in the younger boy's neck and pulling him close. "I can't stay," he said quietly. "I can't. I'm going crazy here. If I hear the word Mudblood one more time..." A shaky breath escaped Regulus's lips and Sirius's fingers tightened in his robes. "Regulus, please," he whispered. "Please don't make this hard for me. I'll still see you at Hogwarts, so it's not like I'm abandoning you." Regulus's voice was cold when he spoke. "Of course you are," he murmured, pulling away and turning his back on Sirius. Sirius watched him wipe his tears away, probably not wanting him to see them, and felt a pang of regret in his chest. "Come with me," he said suddenly. "Let's leave together. We can crash at James's house for a few days and then–" "Don't be ridiculous," Regulus snapped, turning around to glare at his brother. "You know I can't leave. And it's not like I want to." Sirius lifted his hands to wrap his arms around Regulus once again but before he could do that, he changed his mind and let them drop to his sides. He stared at the floor between them and opened, then closed his mouth a couple of times, not knowing what to say. Regulus was a Slytherin; the pride of the family, while Sirius was just...an outsider. He'd never belonged here, had always tried to be different. Their parents' affection for Regulus was clear while Sirius had never known it. "Fine," he murmured, looking up. "Fine." He turned around and walked back to his trunk, trying to shove some more stuff into it without reopening it. It looked as if it was about to burst but Sirius tried to fit as much into it as he possibly could. He didn't even realize that Regulus had moved until he felt his breath on the back of his neck. Momentarily surprised, Sirius whirled around and stared at the smaller boy. Before he knew what he was doing, he'd pressed Regulus against the wall, covering his brother's mouth with his own and kissing him deeply. Regulus's gasp of surprise spurred him on and with a flick of his wand he'd slammed the door shut, locking it behind them. He didn't know what'd gotten into him; he'd never thought about Regulus this way before but it felt so right, and this was the last time they could be this close, and he just didn't want to let the moment go by without taking advantage of it. "What...what are you doing?" Regulus gasped between kisses only to be slammed harder against the wall with Sirius's body pressed against his. "Sir–, Sirussss," he hissed when one of Sirius's thighs was pressed against his growing erection, rubbing it slowly while the older boy's mouth travelled over his neck and collarbone. Even if Sirius had tried, he doubted he could've fought this sudden need for his brother. He had no idea where this was coming from; all the anger, sadness and desperation he'd felt in the last few weeks, months even was rising to the surface and he needed to blow off some steam. Regulus just happened to be there; or that's what Sirius tried to tell himself. But really, deep down, he knew that he loved Regulus more than anything else in the world and that he'd unconsciously been thinking about this for a long time. Regulus was a handsome boy, if not quite as good-looking as Sirius. Where Sirius was tall and muscled, Regulus was smaller and looked more fragile. He knew that Regulus could fight him, however, and the fact that he didn't do that had to mean that Regulus was okay with this, that he wanted this. Pulling back to give both of them a moment to breathe, he pressed his lips to Regulus's ear and let out a shaky breath. "I want you," he hissed. "I need you, Reg, I..." He trailed off, then tugged his brother to the bed and pushed him down on it, moving to straddle Regulus's hips immediately. He could feel his brother's erection pressing into his own, and let out an involuntary groan. Regulus stared up at him with wide, worshipful eyes, looking so young and innocent that Sirius was once again overwhelmed by a sudden surge of possessiveness and affection for his younger brother. He knew that Regulus had never done anything like this before, and the knowledge that he, Sirius, would be his first, thrilled him and sent a jolt of pleasure straight to his cock. He laced his fingers with Regulus's and pinned his arms to the bed on either side of his head. Regulus struggled beautifully for a moment, apparently trying to regain some control, then seemed to abandon the idea altogether, succumbing to Sirius's wish to be in charge. Sirius smiled triumphantly, then leaned forward to inhale his brother's intoxicating smell and lick a stripe from Regulus's shoulder up to his neck, revelling in the soft, breathy moan that escaped Regulus's red, swollen lips. If he'd known how beautiful Regulus looked after a hard kiss, he would've done this years ago, he found himself thinking. He pressed his lips to Regulus's neck and sucked for a moment to taste his skin, then sank his teeth into his brother's pale, tender flesh; bruising that flawless skin, needing to mark him as his. He needed Regulus to know that, even though he was about to abandon his family, Regulus would always belong to him; that they would always have each other. After having spent a sufficient amount of time licking and sucking Regulus's neck, Sirius drew back and pushed the other boy's shirt up to reveal his brother's milky-white torso and those delicious, small, pink nipples. He bent down to catch one of them between his lips, swirling his tongue around it and feeling it harden under his touch. He grazed his teeth over it, smiling when Regulus let out a low, needy moan. He heard him suck in his breath, shivering when Sirius moved his hands down his sides, his nails scraping Regulus's sensitive skin. "Sirius," Regulus breathed, sinking his fingers into Sirius's hair and tugging him back up to kiss his lips. He slid his tongue into his mouth, exploring it with the same need that Sirius felt. They kissed for long minutes, their arousal growing, and when Sirius's cock threatened to explode in his far too tight trousers, he reluctantly broke the kiss, pulling back to tug Regulus's shirt over his head. Regulus reached up with shaky hands, fumbling with the buttons of Sirius's shirt, then finally managed to open it and slide it off Sirius's shoulders. "Like what you see?" Sirius gave him a lopsided grin when he saw the stunned look on his brother's face as he looked at Sirius's much more muscular body. Regulus reached up to trace those muscles with a timid finger but Sirius batted his hand away and got up to get rid of the rest of his clothes. Another breathy sound escaped Regulus as Sirius stood in front of him in his naked glory. Gripping his cock and giving it a few experienced strokes, Sirius was very aware of his brother's eyes on him but chose to ignore them for now. He only looked up when there was a movement on the bed, and watched open-mouthed and still stroking his cock as Regulus undressed clumsily. Blushing under Sirius's scrutinising eyes, Regulus released a nervous laugh, then whined softly to express his desire for Sirius to be back on top of him. Sirius grinned and raised an eyebrow. "You want something?" He showed no inclination to move anytime soon and simply continued stroking himself off as he let his eyes roam over Regulus's delicate body. Regulus sighed and gave him an annoyed look when he managed to tear his eyes away from Sirius's cock for a moment, then let out a helpless whimper, trying to reach for him. Sirius laughed and then leaned forward to nose the faint trail of dark hair leading down from Regulus's navel to the much thicker patch of coarse black hair surrounding his cock. Regulus let out a breathless laugh when Sirius's hair tickled his stomach, then was silenced completely when Sirius's mouth closed around his already leaking cock. Sirius closed his eyes and hummed contently as his head bobbed up and down on his brother's erection while his tongue circled the head slowly, massaging. "Bloody...fuck," gasped Regulus, grasping the bed sheets and trying to keep himself from thrusting upwards into the wet heat of Sirius's mouth. Sirius smiled inwardly, then drew back to trail kisses down the sensitive underside, and nuzzled Regulus's balls, knowing that if he spent too much time just sucking him off, Regulus would probably come too soon. He needed him to last; needed their last moment together in this place to last forever. A thought occurred to him and despite Regulus's whimper of protest, he pulled back and looked up at him hungrily. "Turn around," he hissed, making Regulus's eyebrows shoot up and his mouth fall open in surprise. At the same time, his cock gave a twitch, and, grinning, Sirius realized that his brother enjoyed his commanding tone far more than he had probably expected. Regulus looked down at him curiously for another moment, then, upon seeing the intent look on his brother's face, he complied, rolling over on his stomach. Sirius bit Regulus's ass cheek teasingly, then moved up a little and, very slowly, licked a trail down the younger boy's spine. He could feel Regulus's heart racing while little beads of sweat appeared all over his skin. His body was tense in anticipation; not knowing what to expect. Sirius smirked. He loved having this kind of power over people, and for some reason, with Regulus it was even more satisfying than with other people. His brother's frantic panting resounded in Sirius's ears when he spread his brother's ass cheeks and swiped his tongue over the puckered skin surrounding his tight hole. Regulus yelped in surprise and gripped the bed sheets, almost tearing them to shreds as he unconsciously pressed his ass into Sirius's face, silently asking for more. Sirius smiled and closed his eyes, tracing Regulus's entrance with just the tip of his tongue before teasingly thrusting it in, just to pull it out again. Regulus sobbed in frustration, and Sirius finally gave in, deciding to let his brother have what he so obviously needed. He licked his hole again, then pushed his tongue in a little farther, enjoying the sound of small puffs of breath coming from his brother's lips. He continued his ministrations for another few minutes, then pulled back and smacked Regulus's buttocks playfully. He moved up the other boy's body to lick his ear, and nestled his cock between his brother's ass cheeks; not entering him yet, just letting him feel what was about to come. "Do you want me?" he whispered into his ear, smiling when his hot breath on the other boy's sweaty skin made goose bumps appear all over his body. "Do you want me to fuck you, Regulus? Do you want my cock inside of you? Do you–" "Yes!" Regulus sobbed, reaching back to cup Sirius's ass and press his body harder against his own. "Yes, please. I... I... Need. Ngh." Sirius chuckled, catching Regulus's earlobe between his teeth before sitting up and summoning a tube of lube he'd purchased in a Muggle sex shop he'd visited with James a while ago. He slicked his erection generously, then reached for a pillow and slid it under Regulus's hips to position him in a good angle. Regulus was still panting, almost writhing on the bed and displaying his desire for Sirius openly. A smile played on Sirius's lips as he teasingly rubbed the slick head of his cock against Regulus's impossibly tight opening. Before he pushed inside, he reached for the lube again, slicking his fingers and, without a word of warning, slid two of them inside his brother, gasping at how hot and tight he felt. He'd never experienced anything comparable and he took a few long moments to move his fingers back and forth, crooking them ever so slightly to brush the other boy's prostate. Regulus jerked so hard that he almost threw Sirius off him, and a long, low moan came from him, as he wiggled his ass to get Sirius to touch that magical spot again. Sirius simply smiled and withdrew his fingers before replacing them with his cock, pushing it inside all the way without hesitation. Regulus held his breath and clutched the pillow he'd pressed his face into, his body shaking at the mix of pleasure and pain. Sirius held still, flattening a hand over Regulus's back, rubbing it comfortingly and reassuringly as he gave the younger boy a few moments to get used to the intrusion. Regulus gripped him almost painfully tight, and Sirius needed this moment as well as he was convinced he would come any second if he moved even only the slightest bit. When he felt the pressure around his cock ease off a little as Regulus relaxed, he took a deep breath and started moving slowly, keeping his hand pressed against Regulus's upper back, holding him down as his thrusts became increasingly hard and desperate. He had never felt anything as good as this and he almost forgot that Regulus was a virgin and might be hurting as he pounded into him. He slowed down a little, the blood rushing in his ears as he stroked Regulus's back gently. Before he had the opportunity to ask Regulus if he was okay, the latter turned his head and frowned. "Don't stop," he whispered, licking his lips and swallowing hard. "Go on. Harder. Hurt me. I need to remember this. Please, Sirius..." Sirius's breath caught in his throat at those words and a sudden surge of affection for his brother washed over him because he seemed to need the exact same thing Sirius wanted at that moment. Pausing for another moment to lean forward and place a gentle kiss on Regulus's shoulder and his lips, he started to move again, slamming into him as he felt his orgasm approaching at a rapid pace. He wanted to go on for hours, needed this to last but knew that he couldn't go on for much longer. "God, you feel so good," he breathed, sliding a hand under Regulus's body to stroke him off in time with his almost violent thrusts. He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against the back of Regulus's head as he sank into him again and again until he finally had to let go and came, buried deep inside his brother's body. Regulus cried out, then tightened around Sirius and followed him over the edge only a moment later, his inner walls gripping Sirius's cock tight before he, too, collapsed forward and couldn't do anything except panting heavily, his body still shaking from the force of his orgasm. Sirius groaned as he pushed himself up, a shiver running through him as the cool air in the room caressed his still-slick cock. He flopped down beside Regulus, wrapping an arm around his younger brother and pulling him flush against him, spooning him. Regulus nestled into him, his chest still rising and falling rapidly as he came down from the high of his orgasm. "That was," Regulus started, then shook his head; too overwhelmed to put his emotions in words. Sirius nodded and trailed light kisses over Regulus's neck and shoulder, tightening his arm around the younger boy possessively and closing his eyes. It didn't take long for Regulus to fall asleep in his arms, and Sirius felt another pang of regret as he carefully got off the bed and dressed, knowing that he had to leave now. Regulus would beg him to stay if he waited until the next morning, and Sirius knew that he wouldn't be able to go through with his plan if that happened. He took one last look at his naked brother sleeping peacefully on his bed, then swallowed hard and closed the door behind him, leaving Regulus and everyone else behind. When Regulus woke up the next morning, Sirius was gone. Part of him wanted to cry while another part recalled the events from last night and couldn't help but feel certain that it wasn't the last time something like that would happen. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!