Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/3884713.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage, Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      My_Chemical_Romance, Fall_Out_Boy, frnkiero_andthe_cellabration, Gerard
      Way_and_the_Hormones, Panic!_at_the_Disco
  Relationship:
      Frank_Iero/Gerard_Way, Billie_Joe_Armstrong/Gerard_Way, Frank_Iero/
      Original_Male_Character(s), Brendon_Urie/Dallon_Weekes, Patrick_Stump/
      Pete_Wentz
  Character:
      Frank_Iero, Gerard_Way, Original_Characters, Patrick_Stump, Pete_Wentz,
      Mikey_Way, Billie_Joe_Armstrong, Ray_Toro, Brendon_Urie, Dallon_Weekes
  Additional Tags:
      Smut, Boarding_School, Religious_Content, Religion, Gay_Sex, Teen_Gerard
      Way, Age_Difference, Angst, Homophobia, Bullying, Alternate_Universe_-
      High_School, Heartbreak, Wrongful_Imprisonment, Drug_Use, Drugs,
      Marijuana, Adult_Frank_Iero, age_gap
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-05-05 Updated: 2018-03-14 Chapters: 10/? Words: 15358
****** Sickness ******
by Kinniekiki
Summary
     (Frerard) Gerard Way is sent to a boarding school cause of a shocking
     secret he held for long from his parents. Will this school provide
     something good for him after a whole summer with pain and misery...or
     will things stay the same or end up worse between him and his family.
      
     (Age Difference, Age Gap)
***** Chapter One: Boarding school *****
So this is it" I thought to myself as I made my way out of my parents car a
backpack slung over my shoulder while both my hands carrying two abnormally
large suitcases
"Don't worry hunny this does not mean that we do not love you anymore this is
for your own good" I heard my mums voice from behind me as she placed her palm
on my right shoulder, I looked at her hand and gave her a fake smile. I hated
school as it , having forced to go to a boarding one which is miles away from
where I live and the few friends I have.
I got no idea how we got here , through out the journey I kept thinking why
would they do this to me, separate me from my "friends" which I had a few and
from my best friend ...my brother Mikey. It's not like when every parent finds
out something shocking bout their teenage boy they send him away in a boarding
school.
My mum interrupts me from my thoughts by hugging me tightly, I could hear her
sob quietly, I don't feel sorry for her after all she did agree with dad to
send me away, so she is part of this, and I could not be bothered to hug her
back right now.
I am just standing here infront of a huge ass closed gate not wanting to pass
on to the other side, I already know this is going to be much worse then my
normal high school.
She lets go of me and tells me good bye, she then starts to walk towards the
car and in a matter of seconds I was left alone there staring up ahead like an
idiot. Should I ring the bell? Or should I just grab my stuff and maybe walk
down the road, who knows what good god has left for me, if he did. I wonder if
he even exists, this month has been a living nightmare to me and so my family.
I let out a chuckle and shake my head at that thought, after all in god's eye's
I am one of the biggest sinners that have walked on earth.
I decided to ring the bell when a female voice came out the intercom.
"Yes may I help you?"
"I'm uhm.. I got registered about 2 weeks ago to come to this school?" I said
"Name?" The women said from the other side of the intercom.
"Gerard. Gerard Arthur Way miss". I said a little bit more formal then before
from her voice she didn't seem to be a grumpy old lady
"Okay Gerard I'm coming to get you and show you around campus".
I waited for her to come out, I have little patience in me and waiting seems
like eternity , never in my whole life do I remember being late to something.
But yeah not everyone is the same, and so I waited for a few minutes maybe 10
max? When I saw a women walking to my direction...I thought it was her, she had
long blonde straight hair, her fringe covering her forehead short enough for
her rectangular glasses, she was wearing normal secretary clothing, pin skirt
and a coat
"Gerard way?" She said while opening the gate from her card
I nodded and made my way inside knowing that this is going to be a fresh new
start, bad start.
"Okay Gerard I am Ms. Button I'm the secretary here I'll show you round campus
and then I'll take you to your dorm"
We started walking still with my bags and I was getting tired holding them so I
asked if we could go to the dorm only, I can't be bothered in knowing all the
details in this hell hole.
She didn't look too pleased about my question, she looked at my hands and
nodded agreeing.
"Well Gerard, Some of your dorm friends will show you around the place, this
way" She gestured with her hand showing the way to the dorm, We made it to the
boys dorm? And stopped outside
"Oh Gerard, No boys are allowed in the girls dorm, You can't be caught out of
your dorm after 11 at night your room is number 66 " she said, I nodded and she
started walking.
I'm still having second thoughts about this place I should have taken the other
road, I made my way up the three steps and took a deep breathe , This is it!
Whatever awaits me from now on I shall take it all.
I opened the door and as soon as I stepped inside I get greeted with a football
coming straight to my direction, I had to let go of my stuff to try and dodge
it but it was no use I got hit right in the nose, god that is surely a great
way to start my year in here, I ignored the laughter, grabbed my stuff and made
my way to my room...number 66 huh? Yeah that's the number I remember my parents
gave me a room key before we left home today.
I finally found my room on the left hallway of the second floor, this dorm is
huge compared to the ones in movies.
I should unpack my stuff and maybe get bit of rest or just sleep the whole day
through that is what I did for the past few weeks.
I started to unpack as I remember the things that happened these past few
weeks. Funny how my parents found out I started dating someone they immediately
sent me away after all the nagging telling me I should find someone and stop
being such a fuck up. It's not wrong to date someone I know but depends with
who... I was actually dating a guy for the past few months and we did get along
great his name was Billie.
When I finally decided to tell my parents bout me being gay my dad was pissed
off and said I was a disgrace for the family, my mum she started crying and
Mikey...He knew about it all along.
That's why they sent me here to get my 'Cleaned', if I don't I shall not bother
to return to their house until I become "normal" that's the word they
used...seems like I am not normal so now you know why's a hell hole, it's a
religious fucking school I don't know how they expect me to become normal by
having a cross shoved up my ass by a priest who acts like a teacher.
Finally unpacked everything all my clothes are all in one drawer on top of each
other don't know which is which. Who cares anyway? I don't and my mum isn't
going to be here whining bout my hygiene not that this freaking room was the
best hygienically place ever.
So I'll guess I'll just pass my day sleeping or sketch some things on my
sketch-book that what I'm gonna do and tomorrow I'll start having classes like
normal kids do here...I wonder what their story is, why are they stuck here.
But I won't find out. I am an outcast. Always was and always will be.
***** Chapter Two : Oh dear lord *****
Chapter Notes
     ~Warning may be offensive~
Three weeks have gone by now and instead of making friends it seemed as I made
enemies without even talking to anyone or even looking at them. In the past
three weeks all I got was being pushed into lockers, footballs thrown at me,
glares, even the nerds are being asses towards me I am the worse kid in school,
it feels like I ain't going to make it alive out there. I am the outcast, the
weirdo, the emo kid that should kill himself.
"Hey emo fag, where you going? To your room to cut yourself as you usually do?"
some jock shouted from across the yard. Yeah that’s where exactly I am heading,
since I got here my life has gone downhill and although I wore mostly long
sleeves it was no use to hide some scars that scatter across my pale skin, some
of them has been done years ago and some are fresh, it’s the only release I get
from this fucked up world I live it at the moment, even the teachers they all
hate my guts, I don’t blame them I’m their worse student never returned my work
the only good thing I am at is Art and nothing else and to be quiet honest I
don’t give two fucks about my other lessons especially religion. Word has come
out pretty quickly that I was sent here cause I’m a fag rumors flown quickly
around about my parents catching me sucking off some stranger in an alleyway,
it’s funny it always makes me chuckle when I pass someone and hear them whisper
to each other. So being a religious catholic school that is enough to get the
teachers to hate me more.
Everyone in this place act like they are perfect nobody has ever sinned and
play by the book. I remember last week one of the teachers he’s an old fucker
he came into class glaring at me, and he said “Today we’re going to learn about
the sins that the lord thought us about” he even brought several bibles in
class and passed it down every student when it was my turn he passed me and
said “The lord created man and women to mate together therefore who mated with
the same sex shall be burnt, the book I passed is a very delicate one not
everyone can handle such thing and those who are Sick and sinned that way
cannot handle it and I will surely not pass it down to such dirty hands. Don’t
you agree Mr. Way?”
That’s how every little rumor and every little suspect was answered that they
were true. Not that I mind actually my life’s a shithole as it is so a little
more hate won’t hurt.
Neither my mum or my dad has decided to even call and check on me, I guess the
teachers are telling them everything about me and how am I doing, yet I can
never be certain what kind of shit they’re spilling out of their mouth to my
parents.
"Look at me when I'm talking to you, you faggot!" he said again, this time I
stopped in my tracks and dared to look at him in his eyes. His blank brown
eye's all they shown was hate, I was showing defeat I always ignore them but
what could they possibly do worse than throw a football at me or beat me till I
cannot move an inch, I'm used to that shit.
He looked at his friend on the right and they both smiled, their lips spread
from ear to ear as they started walking slowly towards me still grinning, hear
it comes the third punch in the day
"So...how about we go for a little ride Way" he said while putting his arm over
my shoulders, pushing me forward with his other arm, I should say no and take
his arm off of me and run to my dorm room, lock myself inside. I know these
bastards are up to something, something bad and cruel. They kept pushing me
till we reached a red van, two of them got in the front, and us three in the
back they sat me in the middle making me feel like a banana between two
gorillas ready to pounce on me to see who will get the first bite.
As they started the van I could see rain drops all over the windshield and the
windows, they drove for hours none of them said a word. What could they
possibly do to me? Worse part of it is I got my satchel with me, it got my
personal stuff in it all my sketches, my school books now was the right time to
be fucking scared, not cause of my school books fuck those I couldn’t care less
if they burn them they would actually make me a favor I am only scared for my
drawings.
I had this sketch book for years now and I carry it every where I go,
remembering back when I drew Billie at his house, that’s by far my favorite
one, it was like the one from the titanic scene, I remember how he prompted
himself on the couch and smiled while saying “Oh Gee, do draw me like one of
your French girls”. Those are the greatest memories I have when I was with him.
Nothing else was as heart-warming as much as him, I miss him so dearly I forgot
to tell you that my poor excuse of a parents took my phone away from me to make
sure I don’t call or text Billie. I always wonder if he moved on? If he had
forgotten about me? We were doing so great oh so great I didn’t even get to say
goodbye nor tell him what was going on and before all this shit went down we
were about to take it to the next level and become official, that only led me
to being dragged to a boarding school, bullied and now stuck in a van between
four human Gorilla’s that swallowed too many steroids.
The rain has gotten worse by now, I could hear the wind whistle against the
windows, all I could see from the windshield were raindrops that never seem to
end and a trail of rain being blown by the wind.
The van came to a halt the jock on the left side looked at me and smiled I felt
the other jocks big hands on mine as I struggled to get free, he pulled my
jacket off as the other jock opened the door threw me out the van my bag
following behind dropping on the floor making it get almost soaked.
All I heard was the van driving away from me, the rain has gotten worse, I was
soaking wet and still only seconds passed. I helped myself to stand up while
grabbing my bag, glancing around it only seemed to be a long road that never
ends, I can feel raindrops running down my cheeks sighing as I start to walk to
the opposite side where the van left, my instincts telling me if I walk the
opposite way I'll find my way back to school, I bet it's going take hours to
get back, it’s already dusk out here meaning the car ride was for hours it was
about five o clock when the jocks got me, I looked down at my wrist remembering
that I was wearing a watch to my luck it stopped working it was not waterproof,
what’s the point of getting an expensive watch? This was the point of getting
an expensive fucking watch to make sure it never stops in the fucking rain,
even though it stopped on half past six I won’t be able to know how long it
will take me to get back, and when I do what the hell am I going to tell the
fucking principal? I got kidnapped by some jocks and was left out in the
street?
“Oh look the poor little faggot got kidnapped he said great excuse Way to hide
the fact you went off fucking someone in an alleyway isn’t that what you did
back in the day?” I said to myself out loud shaking my head yep that will
surely be his answer either just say I was indeed fucking someone or just make
another excuse up which will be followed by that saying I just said.
Thank you dear lord for this great life you offered me you fucker.
***** Chapter Three: Miles away *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Have you ever seen a cat after being thrown in a fucking bath tub filled with
water? The way it’s fur stick against its little skin when it manages to get
out? I’m far worse than that that.
The rain hasn’t shown any mercy, I’m soaking wet my hair is sticking everywhere
around my face and my shoes are squelching uncomfortably on the mud that has
been formed on the side walk not to mention they’re fucking killing me due to
all the walking, I have never walked so much in my whole entire life.
I feel like I’ve walked a mile and this road never came to end and to my luck
this road it fucking deserted since I have been walking only one car passed and
to make it worse the driver decided to play a little trick on me and instead of
stopping to check on me he passed an huge ass puddle splashing all the dirty
water all over me making me get more soaked if that was even possible by now.
The wind howling making the cold rain hit against my bare arms and face; teeth
chattering, skin cold as ice as I shiver alone in this god forsaken road I come
to halt as I glanced around in the dark. There is nothing around just road and
mud everywhere, sighing I rubbed my eyes with both my hands, this feels like
I’m being punished by the almighty creator, anger boiling inside of me I threw
my satchel on the ground and kicked the mud all over the place followed by a
scream from the top of my lungs . This cannot be fucking happening, my life’s a
shit hole as it is and if I don’t find somewhere safe in a few minutes I’m sure
I’m going to end up with a terrible fucking cold or worse bronchitis having the
best immune system on earth I am sure I won’t fucking pass that thing and
honestly if I do catch I don’t think I’ll even try to fight it.
Sighing again while running both my hands against my scalp I sat down on the
mud and stared up at the cloud covered sky; “Is this what you had planned for
me?” I said as if there was someone up there who gave a fuck, if there was.
“Well played, hope I have a reserved seat next to Satan cause if I don’t you
wouldn’t want me to come up there and kick your fucking ass for this” I said
again making myself chuckle, that’s it Gerard you finally cracked.
Still staring upwards I didn’t even realize a car came to a stop in front of me
only for its honking to bring me back to reality, as I looked ahead at the
black car I see the passenger side window moving down it was far too dark to
make out who it was in the car;
“Hey kid get off your ass and get in here” the stranger said revealing that the
person was indeed a male, honestly I don’t care about the basics never trust a
stranger or never get in a car with stranger by now I’m far too desperate to
find some cover then again if this stranger has something up his sleeve I’d
rather get murdered then die alone out here like a fucking animal.
“Come on, get up you’re going to catch a terrible cold” he said again, I stood
up, grabbed my satchel and made my way towards the car. I got in the heat
inside surrounding me making me sigh in relief.
“Damn you’re soaked, how long have you been out here?” he asked, I looked at
the stranger to be stunned at the most beautiful pair of eyes I have ever seen
in my life , let alone the beauty his face holds he looks like a fucking god
sent from the seven heavens and I thought Billie was beautiful well he was but
this guy, this guy is another story immediately all my doubts about him
murdering me left me atleast he doesn’t give the impression of being one then
again he was a stranger I have never seen in my whole entire life, honestly
it’s such a pity.
Wrecking my brain apart as I tried to form a sentence, “I- ugh A while yes a
while” I said sounding like an idiot, the stranger smiled lightly causing me to
almost sink in the passenger seat Jesus Christ if I could touch him right now
not to feel him up just to check if he was real or just a hallucination.
“A while?” he said, reaching for the back things could be heard ruffling about
back there even a zipper opening up might be a bag “it looks like you’ve been
out there for hours” I nodded as I looked up ahead at the road finally sighing
in relief as my cold skin got warmer thanks to the heating.
“Yea something like that” I managed to say, apparently he found what he was
looking “Here, change your shirt I think this might fit you” he said placing a
black shirt in my hands I smiled lightly at him and thanked him while sliding
my soaking wet shirt over my head.
“Wait don’t put in on just yet let me see if I can find a towel back here so
you’ll dry off you’ll get that shirt wet too.” He said again as he unbuckled
his seat belt and leant more down to check whatever he has back there after
seconds I guess he found what he was looking for as he sat down back behind the
wheel and handed me a towel.
“Guess this is your lucky day” he said still smiling giving me the towel, I let
out a chuckle yeah so fucking lucky right? How ironic that sounds.
“Yea it is, thanks” I said, patting my torso with the towel and then slid his
shirt on, it was a little bit tight but it will do.
“So, what on earth are you doing out here in the middle of a storm?” he asked,
I took a deep breath and looked at him, yea like I’m going to tell him that I
just got my ass dragged out here by some jocks from school.
“Just taking a stroll and got lost” I said sarcastically a smile on my lips, he
nodded and shook his head “Yea a stroll in the middle of now where, even my
five year old cousin could make up a better excuse then that” he said letting
out a chuckle
“Seriously how the hell did you end up out here?” he asked again.
“I actually don’t want to talk about it” I said, he shrugged as the engine came
to life “Suit yourself, where are you heading?”
“Would you believe me if I said I have no idea where I am and where I was
before?” I said.
“Uh okay that’s bad, really bad well you’re a couple of miles away from
Belleville and a hell lot of miles away from Newark” he said.
Well Newark does sound familiar but honestly I got no idea what the name of the
school is nor where it is, please use this as a note that when you go to a
place do ask around where you are cause this shit is stupid and I feel stupid.
“Still don’t know but Newark sounds familiar” I said, he lets out another
chuckle and I look at him to find him shaking his head.
“You’re a confused boy” he said, I nodded and shrugged indeed I am so confused.
“Where were you before you ended up alone out here?” he asked again his eyes
still focused on the road.
“Uhm at a boarding school? Don’t know the name of it.” I said. He’s pretty
persistent isn’t he? I mean yeah if I was in his shoe I would have done the
same try and find out where the kid came from. Then again I am not one refusing
to say what exactly happen to me.
“Ah. Okay either we turn back and try to search this school of yours or stop at
a motel that’s a couple of kilo metres away and find this school of yours
tomorrow morning.” He said I sighed in relief as he dropped the subject it
seems like a good idea and I’m so fucking tired right now, luckily it’s going
to be Saturday tomorrow so no classes worse scenario that can happen if my
parents decide to come and see me. They will flip their shit if they find out I
wasn’t there, they will come to conclusion that their faggot of a son ran away
with someone and I bet the teachers will surely try their best to make it look
like that. I hugged my satchel against my chest and exhaled deeply.
“By the way the name’s Frank” he said I looked at him and smiled lightly.
Frank? Honestly for his beautiful features that name does not suit him.
“Gerard” I replied still clutching my satchel to my chest I just hope my
drawings didn’t get fucked up cause of the rain.
Chapter End Notes
     Chapter Three is here, ^^ I appreciate every comment and Kudos they
     make me so happy and want to upload much more faster
***** Chapter Four: Belleville *****
I didn’t know I fell asleep until I felt someone nudge my shoulder lightly, the
voice was faint and it seems like they were talking from miles away, as I
regain by full consciousness I found myself in car to my amazement my memory
did flood back quickly from the jocks the weather and then those beautiful
hazel-green stunning eyes. Stunned at how my eyes betrayed me in a car with a
stranger I looked around to find myself still in the car;

“Hey kid wake up” he said I looked at him the street light emitting on his
features. My mouth dry, my head feels like it’s about to explode.
“W-Where are we?” I managed to say as I looked out at the road, which wasn’t
the road I was left in we were in a neighbourhood.
“We’re in Belleville, parked outside of my apartment.” he said as he took the
keys out of the ignition. I nodded as I undid the seatbelt which I do not
remember doing.
“Oh okay, I’m uh sorry for falling asleep, I didn’t even notice how tired I
was” I said as I opened the door.
“It’s okay kid, you were exhausted” he slid out of the car and opened the back
door, I felt panic go through my body as I remembered my satchel and it was
nowhere near me, looking down at my feet and then back at Frank, my breathing
was getting rapidly as my heart furiously ached as I realized I lost everything
I had left of Billy.
Gathering myself together I inhaled deeply and exhaled “Are you okay kid? You
look like you’ve seen a ghost” he said, I looked back at him, he was still in
the backseat taking out his stuff on the pavement.
“Have you seen my satchel? I had it with me in the car, I cannot find it.”
“It’s here in the back, you dropped it while you were asleep” he said while
handing it to me.
“Oh, thanks” I gently took it and sighed in relief as I hugged it against my
chest, damn this headache is kill me, my feet are killing everything fucking
hurts.
“Come on kid you’re not planning of staying in the car all night are you?”
Frank said as he closed the back door, I nodded and slid out the car, closing
the door behind me, I followed him as he clicked the little remote on his key
chains to lock the car.
I followed him behind up to his apartment, it wasn’t such a big building, there
were only 5 stories the apartment itself wasn’t as big as I expected, then
again there were three doors in one hallway which obviously the apartment
wouldn’t be that big.
Frank placed his luggage’s by the couch and plopped himself down on it;
“I fucking hate driving for so long it’s exhausting” he said either to me or to
himself. I was still stuck between the hallway and the apartment’s door, should
I trust him? What if he rapes me? Then again he had that chance when I was fast
asleep in his car earlier.
“Are you just going to stand there all night?” he said as he stood himself up
from the couch and made his way to another room, which from where I am standing
could clearly see it was a kitchen I heard something pouring and then two
clicks, I could see his back from here and honestly he didn’t look like he
could do harm, he was shorter then I was and lean, but I can make out the
details of his biceps from underneath that awfully tight shirt he was wearing
and those tight jeans weren’t helping I could see every little movement
underneath them and god that made my mouth water. What the fuck am I thinking?
I only met this stranger a couple of hours ago and here I am drooling over him
my teenage hormones are the ones that will get me in trouble one day.
“Coffee?” he asked as he turned around to face me instantly making me blush, it
was too obvious in his arched brows that he saw me staring at him, I brought my
hand up to my neck and cleared my throat “Y-Yea please” I said as I slowly made
my way inside, closing the door softly behind me. It wasn’t much to expect from
the apartment a small living room with a small dining table a little bit away
from the couch that had four chairs round it, there was a small hallway that
led to two other rooms which I think was a bedroom and bathroom.
Frank came back into the living holding two mugs filled with coffee and handed
me one as he sat down on the couch, I sat down next to him and inhaled the
scent from the mug, god that’s so relaxing all my nerves has calmed down by the
smell of caffeine.
“What time is it?” I asked, Frank rolled his sleeve up a little bit revealing
colourful skin under the gourmet and a silver watch “Half past Three” he said
shaking his hand so that the sleeve will return back in its place. Jesus fuck
it’s late, I sighed and took a sip, who in the right mind would be drinking
coffee at this hour? Gerard Arthur Way and Frank whatever his surname is it’s a
good thing I’m sort of immune to Caffeine luckily I won’t be jumping around
like a child for some twisted reason it calms me down sometimes I guess that’s
what an addiction is right?
“Well, Gerard right? You’re lucky this couch can be turned into a bed, I’ll get
you some covers, a pillow and in the morning we’ll go search for this school of
yours” Frank said placing the mug on the coffee table and pushing it further
away from the couch.
“Yea, yea, uhm Thanks for this” I said getting up from the couch scratching my
neck a bit. He shrugged and smiled as he made his way down the hallway
disappearing into the left room, his smile making my knees get weak god damn it
Gerard get your shit together it hasn’t even been a month since I last saw
Billie and here I am, a strangers smile is literally making it impossible for
me to think straight. I mean yea it’s been over a month since I had a good
night. What you thought I was a virgin? I consider myself being one of those
few teenagers who actually lost their Virginity pretty late, being fifteen
almost sixteen in a few months that’s pretty late in today’s society. Billie
was my first one and I don’t regret it, I loved him and it felt great but now
being away from him and his touch is killing me, life is short yeah but when it
comes to dating and relationships you don’t have to speed things up, and me and
Billie were taking it oh so slow, but shit happens to those less fortunate in
life I never thought I would ever find anyone else attractive other than him
yeah, thinking about it now it’s fucking stupid. And I’m fucking stupid I
cannot lie and say Frank isn’t attractive cause that man was fucking beautiful.
He returned back into the room and arranged the couch and placed the sheets and
pillow on it “Night kiddo” he said patting me on my shoulder.
“Night” I said sitting down on the couch while running both my hands through my
hair.

Exhaustion finally got to me again and without thinking twice I was drifted
into dream world where thin lips and beautiful hazel eyes surrounded me.
***** Chapter Five: Carry on *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
“Hey kid, wake up” I heard a faint voice say followed by a tap on my shoulder,
I stirred on the uncomfortable thing I slept last night, I can’t remember my
dorms bed being this stiff, slowly opening my eyes I take a glance of my
surroundings and realise this is not my dorm.
“Coffee?” I heard someone say from behind me, I quickly sat up and looked
around the quick motion making my head almost exploding making me grunt,
bringing a hand to my temple I squeezed the side of my temple and closed my
eyes shut together.
“Woah are you okay?” he said again, I nodded and opened my eyes to see those
two beautiful hazel eyes that I dreamt about all night staring back at me,
everything finally came back to me the jock, the rain, the car ride and
Frankie. Oh Frankie the handsome man I met on the road and offered to give me a
lift and help me out. The man who’s eyes refused to leave my sight in my
dreams.
“You don’t look okay to me kid” he said again as he walked back into the living
room with two mugs in his hands, he gave me one and held his against his chest
as he sat down next to me on the couch. I brought the mug up to my nose and
tried to inhale the scent of caffeine only to find both my nostrils blocked,
well fuck this shit no wonder I have a raging head ache, my nose is blocked I
feel fucking weak and confused good job Gerard you got yourself a fucking cold.
“So, do you remember the name of the school?” Frank asked, I am honestly not
really a morning person, I hate talking in the morning and knowing that
yesterday I walked for miles my feet are still fucking sore from it, then again
I didn’t bother to take them off and change cause yeah Gerard Way is not lazy
at all- see the hint of sarcasm there?.
I shook my head at him and sipped a little bit of coffee, feeling the liquid
burn my mouth and throat he hummed lightly and drank a bit from his own mug. We
quietly drank coffee, I battling with myself not to stare at the beauty that is
sitting down next to me I could feel myself getting light headed, my head
hasn’t topped aching and my blocked nose isn’t helping either I seriously need
some aspirins right now.
“Frank, do you have any aspirins or something? I don’t feel so well” I said
looking at him, he smiled and nodded placing the mug on the coffee table,
getting up and going down the hallway, returning back with a bottle of aspirins
in his hand, he gave me it and sat right back down, “Thought so, you’re paler
then a ghost” he said as he took the mug in his hands again.
I took the pills and swallowed them with the last bit of coffee left in my mug,
I frowned down at the emptiness damn that was good coffee. Frank took both mugs
into the kitchen, I looked around the room and saw my satchel resting against
the couch next to my leg, my heart beating fast, I need to check the paintings,
I’m so fucking scared of them being ruined snatching it I opened it and took my
drawings out of it, my heart dropped as I felt them soaking wet, pulling them
completely out they were indeed soaked, there goes everything I worked hard on
for the past several months, I unfolded each paper and placed them on the small
coffee table, glaring down at what was meant to be figures of people and Billie
only for it to just a mass of colours faded and added together, damn this
fucking sucks all of them are fucked and the most precious one was nothing but
a mess.
I rested my elbows on my lap as I ran my hands through my hair and sighed, I
didn’t notice Frank was back until I heard him clear hit throat next to me, I
looked up at I can tell from how his face fell when he looked at me that I
looked upset, of course I’m upset! I can’t believe this everything is ruined,
the little things I had left to remind me of Billie was gone there is nothing
left to remind me of him except the memories will carry on throughout the
months and as time passes he will eventually find someone else and his memories
of me will fade too, he’ll look back at say “I used to date a loser back when I
was in high school, I forgot his name” and then I’ll know I’ll still be on my
own, and I know that by the time I reach a certain age death will call my name
and I will accept it with open arms, I cannot bear to live on my own, everyone
fucking hates me.
“Hey, Hey what’s up?” I hear Frank said as I was brought back to reality to
find him scoot closer to me and his arms around my shoulders, I didn’t realize
I was crying until I felt a tear slide down my lips leaving a taste of
saltiness in my mouth, I look away from him and back at what used to be
drawings, I felt more tears escape my eyes as I broke into a fit of sobbing, my
head in my heads as I cried all the pain and grief away, everything that has
happened in these few weeks has taking a huge toll in my life, and here I am
now crying pathetically in the arms of a stranger who picked me up from the
road.
“There There” he patted me on my back as he pulled me into a hug, as my crying
slowed down I felt a wave of relief escaping me as if a rock was finally pulled
out of my chest, and honestly being hugged against him made me feel at peace
with myself, I can hear his heartbeat which is calming me down and so is his
hand on my back as it gently runs up and down my spine, which I am sure if this
was any other moment that would have not calmed me but stirred something up.
“Thank you” I whispered as I pulled away from him, hiding my face behind my
hair, “It’s nothing kid, is there something bothering you?” he asked his voice
so soft and full of sincerity, I shrugged as I grabbed all the papers and
gathered them into one stack “It’s been a rough month ya know?” I said I don’t
want to pin my pathetic life on this stranger so that will be enough to fill
him in with details, as I was about to place my stuff back into the satchel his
hand made its way on mine stopping it, I looked up at him, his face was so
soft, and so mesmerizing;
“I’m here if you need to talk kid” he said, his hand still on mine, I smiled
lightly and nodded “Thanks I appreciate it, now it’s best I find out which
school I was in” I said, he shook his head “You seem sick and your hands are
burning up, you’re not going anywhere until you’re completely healthy,
yesterday when I found you, you weren’t in the best shape” he said standing up
and taking the stack of papers away from my hands and placing them on the
coffee table, of course I wasn’t in my best shape I walked for hours, in the
rain in the fucking cold after a whole day of a fucked school, then again he
didn’t know right?
“It’s okay Frank, I should go though, I shouldn’t bother you, you have your
life” I said as I insisted and grabbed my papers again, he shook his head and
chuckled “A Life? It will let me sleep easily knowing that you’re safe and
healthy rather than out there on your own and you’re not bothering me if you
were I wouldn’t have picked you up in the first place kid, now if I was you I’d
get off your little ass and go take a shower maybe that will make you feel
better, than you can go into the bedroom I’ll try and find something to fit you
and leave it there for you to change”.
“You really shouldn-“
“Gerard, like I said you’re not bothering me it’s okay just go, use whatever
you want in the bathroom, school will eventually wait” he said, taking my hands
and pulling me up to my feet, after all the school won’t notice the little
faggot is missing right? Maybe this is a new start? Maybe it’s a sign for me to
make something out of it? I nodded at Frank and he smiled showing his little
teeth, almost making my knees give up on me, I quickly tried my best to go
inside the bathroom and locked the door behind me
Damn you Frank why’d you have to be so gorgeous?
Chapter End Notes
     Yes the pun was indeed intended at the part of "Memories will carry
     on"
     So this is Chapter Five, it's not great just have a lot of stuff on
     my mind but I wanted to upload cause I am loyal to you all~!
     So how's it going so far?
     Please Rate, Comment and subscribe
     ►For those who are interested this is my Tumblr you can
     ask,follow,►http://iikayleighii.tumblr.com/
     ♥KayKay♥
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     ♥Thank you♥
***** Chapter Six: My velocity starts to make you sweat *****
I sighed In relief as I rested my back against the door, I looked down at my
now tight jeans, just a simple smile all he had to do is smile to make me stir
in my jeans, although I feel sick and like shit I still cannot control my god
damn dick.
Glancing at the mirror I do indeed look like shit, my hair is a mess, my face
is abnormally pale… then again I’m as pale as a vampire and nothing is
considered normal about me so for me to say abnormally pale that shit IS
abnormal.
Still having to solve this problem between my thighs a blush appear on my cheek
giving my face  a little bit of color remembering that I am not alone in this
apartment.
Quickly I stripped off my clothing and found my way in the shower and before
the water his against my skin my hand was already on my hard cock, the warm
water making it more ease to slide my hand up and down it a moan escaped my
lips as my thumb teased the tip, making my cheeks go red as I realized Frank
could have heard that, and how embarrassing and awkward it will be when I’m
done from here, yet that made my hand tighten around myself the thought of
Frank hearing my made my cock twitch into my hands as I gained speed, my hips
bucking, my breathing heavy as I bit down on my tongue not to let the moans
escape me.
It’s been such a long time since I touched myself but I can’t stop now, not now
when my cock is leaking like a tap, I kept pumping myself, my eyes closed as I
imagined what it felt like to have Franks warm mouth wrapped around my dick,
and as the imagine came into my head that’s what sent me over board, biting as
hard as I could into my lips still making trashy noises that I am sure could be
heard from over the running water, as I emptied myself onto the tiled floor,
white liquid going down the drain as my hand kept riding myself out of my
orgasm.
As I regained my breath, I rested my head against the tiled floor, my body
still shaking “for fuck sake Gerard” I said to myself as I chuckled a bit
shaking my head, I cannot believe I just did that, in someone’s apartment who I
just met the night before and imagined him sucking me off.. Well done Gerard
you sick bastard. Yet I can’t help but smile at myself and the thought of Frank
hearing me wasn’t embarrassing anymore, there goes my libido changing me into
someone else thank you.
After a while of chuckling and feeling like a total asshole, I found me arguing
with myself whether or not go out the bathroom, what if he did hear me? What if
he throws me out? Oh fuck I’m such an idiot I shouldn’t have done that, yet I
couldn’t help myself, but its nature right?! Nothing wrong in jerking off in a
stranger’s bathroom while thinking of them….. Saying it like that it’s so
fucking wrong, it’s sick and weird.
I took a deep breath and rolled the towel around me before leaving the
bathroom, I looked down the hallway to where the living room was and I couldn’t
see Frank there, as soon as I turned my head the other direction I see a very
red cheeked Frank come out of the bedroom, he rubbed the back of his head and
looked down at his feet, “ugh cl-othes in there” he pointed towards the door
and slowly walked past me, I felt my cheeks turn red as well as his reaction
screamed out that he heard me.
I went into the bedroom and found the clothes on the bed, the boxers where
okay, the shirt was fine but the jeans… they were too fucking tight, I looked
down and could see the outline of my dick formed I sighed and shook my head
this is a mess, I can’t go out there like this and to my luck I heard a soft
knock coming from the already opened door, my head snapped to the side to see
Frank there, I felt my cheeks burn again as my hands made their way towards my
very formed genitals;
“Are those clothes alright?” he asked, I shook my head a little bit, looking
down at my hands.
“I knew they might have been too tight, let me search for something else
meanwhile take those off” he said gesturing towards very tight jeans while he
walked past me into the closet, I watched him go past me and my eyes landed on
his well-formed ass, making my dick stir a bit, way to go Gerard, and as he
bent down I couldn’t take my eyes off of him, and my problem was getting worse,
this cannot be happening I just did the job in the bathroom I cannot get a hard
on again I just can’t not in front of him, not while I’m wearing a very tight
jeans that if my problem keeps growing I am sure the button is going to pop!
And if I never believed In god I was praying right now, Praying for whoever is
up there to not let me make a fool out of myself, my eyes landed on a piece of
artwork that was hanging from on top of the bed, and that’s when the thoughts
about Billie, my work being ruined and everything came running back, totally
killing my boner and a sudden burst of guilt rushed up my body.
Frank got out of the closet with a pair of sweatpants in his hands “This is all
I have and there is a big chance they’ll fit you” he said as he placed them on
the bed I tried my best not to show guilt nor sadness as I faked a smile and
nodded at him “Th-Thank you for everything” I said as I took the sweat pants in
my hands, he smiled that oh so beautiful smile of his and started walking out
the room “Want breakfast?” he asked halfway down the hallway, in instant my
stomach growled “Yes Please” I yelled back as I slid the tight jeans off of me,
making me sigh in relief and sliding the sweat pants up I never wore this type
of pants but damn they’re so comfortable no wonder everyone in school wore
them. School…. I am seriously not looking forward into going back I wish I
could remain sick till the end of the year.
***** Chapter Seven: Hypocrite *****
“Ach-oo” I sneezed bringing a tissue up to my stuffed noise wiping away the
snotty problem, oh fuck it’s only been a few hours into the day and I feel like
I’ve been sick for a month, my body is trembled with the sudden cold air that
seemed to enter from the little cracks on the wall, making me shiver on the
sofa and as much as I felt cold the more sweat poured out of my body.
‘’Oh fuck” I said shaking as I brought my knees closer to my chest, feeling my
lungs ache with every little breath I took, Children don’t smoke …. Atleast not
from a young age.
“Man, are you sure you don’t want me to take you to the hospital? You don’t
look so good” Frank said as he wrapped a blanket around my shoulders, I nodded
and sniffed making an awful sound while I pulled the blanket closer around my
shaking body.
‘’It’-s i-t’s ok-ay, b-ad immune sy-stem” I stuttered out, my teeth chattering
and the more I seem to try to take control of my body the more it seems to go
against me.
I saw Frank raise an eyebrow at me and shook his head “Yea… bad immune system,
if you get worse by tomorrow I’m dragging you down there” he said pointing at
me.
I nodded, hey it’s the least I could do, If it wasn’t for him I would have been
dead by now, my thoughts were soon interrupted by what seemed to be a breaking
news broadcast, the reporter appeared on the flickering screen and started
speaking.
“A Fifteen year old boy from Summit New Jersey, has been reported missing in
the last twenty four hours, last time he was seen was at the Newark’s  St,
Patricks boarding school around the time of noon, heading back towards the boys
dorm, some even said they saw him enter a van with some other friends, he goes
by the name of Gerard Arthur Way-“
A photo of me was brought up on the tv, I’m in shock, “T-That’s me” I said to
myself as the photo of me was shown all across the nation, Frank hummed and
from the edge of my eyes I could see him nodding.
“People seem to care about you” he said, still staring at the t.v as it changed
to my fucking parents, faking sadness and their cry.
“Please if anyone have seen my baby boy do tell him to come back” my mother
 ‘’sobbed out’’ to the camera, I shook my head in disbelief what a fucking
bitch putting on that act.
“Well I’ll be uhm I’ll call them let them know you’re here and that you’re a
little bit sick” Frank said while he stood up, stretching his body a bid, I
quickly looked at him, oh god he cannot tell them I’m here, no I don’t want to
go back not with them not to that school.
“No, don’t, I-I” I couldn’t find the right words, I cannot tell him that I want
to stay here, this man doesn’t know me.
“hmm? How come? They want you to go back Gerard, don’t be a child now” he said
as he made his way towards the landline, woah those things still exist, he
grabbed the phone and started to dial the number, I quickly ran towards him and
snatched the phone out of his hand;
“Frank, Please don’t they don’t want me, I don’t want to go back it’s all fake,
if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t be here begging you to not call that number”
He sighed and looked at me “Gerard, you know I can go to prison for keeping a
missing person, let alone a minor” he said.
“I’ll get off your back, tomorrow I’ll leave, just please I need to trust you
not to call them, I don’t want to go back, you don’t know what it’s like in
that school.” I continued clutching the phone between my fingers.
“Gerard you don’t have to leave especially not with that cold of yours, but I
seriously need to think about this, I cannot just let you go out there on your
own, I can’t make you go back but I can’t keep a missing minor in my apartment”
he said followed by a sigh as he stared down at his feet “Why don’t you want to
go back?” he asked looking back up at me, his eyes pleading for me to answer
him, my breathing stops in my throat as I stare at him, what I’d give to just
simply caress his cheeks and run my fingers slowly over his lips.
“I-I” I stuttered again, my eyes cannot leave his as I tried to make out a
sentence, my brain is not functioning right.
It feels like I have been staring at him for hours right now but it’s only been
seconds, I tried to regain focus again and started “My parents sent me away to
that boarding school cause, I-I-“ again I stopped, I felt a wave of panic rush
through my body what if he’s homophobic?!, what if I tell him that I’m gay and
he beats me up, or worst kill me for being near him oh my god, my fingers
tightened against the phone making the plastic cover crack around them, I start
to look around in panic as I tried to make up lie.
“Because you’re?” he asked, taking a step closer to me which made me flinch
backwards still holding onto the phone, fucking panic attacks.
“Because I did something they …. felt that… it was disapproving?” I questioned
him while I looked around for something to just change the subject, but me
being me and having the best luck upon the earth, the news broadcaster answered
the question for me;
“Rumors has it the boy has ran away with his boyfriend who happen to be the
same age as the young men, you know how teenagers are these days, their parents
disapprove of something and they run away with their loved one, although there
is no evidence that the eldest Way did indeed run away, his lover hasn’t been
answering phone calls from the boys family nor way he at home when the cops
went to check there”
Billie…. A photo of Billie was shown onto the screen followed by another one
with both of us in a friendly pose just arms draped over each other’s shoulder,
I had that photo glued to my mirror my mom must have given it to them to show
it, I felt my heart drop in my chest while my eyes were glued to another pair
of blue orbs staring back at me from the television.
“Oh… that explains” I heard Frankie say, in an instant I looked at him waiting
for him to react the same way everyone reacted towards me when they found out
I’m homosexual.
“Fucking homophobes” he continued as he marched towards the t.v while the new
anchor was bashing on homosexuality and how teenagers aren’t sure about their
sexuality cause apparently our sex drive is too high.
I stared at Frankie while he turned the television off and sighed “I understand
what you’re going through kid, I’ve been there myself.” He finished with
another sigh as he ran his hand through his hair “So, I’m guessing you’re
parents sent you there cause you’re gay in hope of you to turn straight and
bring home an overused cunt”
I nodded, finally realizing that I was still holding onto the phone, I placed
it down on the receiver and walked towards him.
“You do-n’t seem sho-cked” I said stopping behind the couch, making sure not to
get too close to the men since he found out I’m a queer now, I don’t want him
to be uncomfortable.
“Shocked?” he chuckled and shook his head “That would make me a hypocrite
sweetheart” he flashed me a toothy grin and I swear his words caught me off
guard, he’s gay… he’s fucking gay just like me and he’s so fucking gorgeous
Gerard just stop.
“Oh” is all I could say as I quickly took a seat on the couch, butterflies
flying all over my stomach.
***** Chapter Eight: Ten Years *****
It’s been a couple of hours since the news broadcast reported me missing, me
and Frank are sitting silently staring at the flashing pictures on the
television, we still haven’t spoken a word since well, since we both sort of
came out? And to top it all off, my cold is getting worse, I cannot stop trying
to sniff which helps not getting a snotty problem all over my lips.
Frank sighed and clapped both his hand on his thighs “you hungry?” he asks; I
nod a little bit. He stood up and made his way towards the kitchen, “You don’t
mind vegetarian?” he poked his head out the door, “Nah, all good” I said my
voice sounding weird due to my nose being clogged up. He smiled lightly and
disappeared back into the kitchen.
“I’m glad you don’t mind vegetarian food, because that would be a problem” he
said again over the sound of utensils falling and clicking in the kitchen
“Shit” he continued, I chuckled a bit and stood up making my way towards the
kitchen.
“You need some help?” I asked as I walked through the door, into a really small
kitchen, exactly as you walk in on your right side there is a silver
refrigerator, a silver cooker and the rest white cupboards which weren’t modern
but not old, Frank was on my left side cutting up some veggies next to the
sink.
“Nah, all good” he said, his hands shaking a little bit.
“Are you sure?” I asked again, getting closer to him, he sets the knife down
and chuckles a bit.
“I’m a little bit excited, I haven’t had a guest in here for years and cooking
for someone else really got me worked up” he said as he shook his head.
I smiled lightly and placed my hand on his shoulder giving it a little squeeze,
“There is no need to work yourself up Frank, just do what you usually do, but
difference is I’m here to help you out, maybe cut up the veggies or clean the
dishes whatever”
“I think it’s best you go back into the living room and rest, I don’t want no
germs on my plate” he pointed with the knife towards the kitchen doorway, and
chuckled at the last part.
I rolled my eyes at him “Germs are awesome, you’d get to skip work, school or
whatever you do” I rested my lower back against the counters next to him as he
continued chopping away.
“Not when you live on your own and have bills to pay”.
Hmm, maybe I should get to know him a little bit and I have my way of words.
“Well, if you do indeed get sick, don’t you have any family or some sort of
boyfriend to help you out for that month?” I crossed my hands together over my
chest, Frank chuckled and shook his head slowly.
“Family? I did have once, and me a boyfriend? I don’t even want to go there” he
said while filling a pot with water and putting the veggies inside of it.
“I know what you’re going through, I’ve been there, honestly it’s Deja-vu all
over again, I came out when I was your age and yea they sent me away to that
same school you’re in, I only stayed there a week before running away from
there” he continued as he rested his back against the refrigerator in front of
me.
“Oh, I was thinking of doing that on my first week, but I didn’t” I said
looking down at the white tiles below my feet.
“Honestly, I’m amazed you survived more than a week in that school, how long
have you been in there before finally getting the fuck out of there?”
“I never ran away from there”
“Then what the hell where you doing on the side of the road in th-“
“It was a cruel prank some jocks played on me” I whispered lightly, it’s
actually embarrassing, I managed to let some jocks man handle me. I looked up
to meet with Frank’s eyes a scowl on his face.
“What do you mean a cruel prank?” he asked
“I really don’t want to talk about it”
“but you have to talk about it, you could have died out there, that’s bloody
murder” he continued pushing himself off the refrigerator and walking towards
me his arms flailing everywhere.
I really didn’t think this conversation was going that way, I sighed and rubbed
my forehead while taking a deep breath in, “Listen, please Frank not today,
it’s been a long day, I mean everyone across the nation knows about me”.
“Yeah, everyone thinks you’re just a stupid teenager that ran away with his
boyfriend-“
“Don’t mention him” I said almost into a shout the mention of Billie is too
much right now, I miss him and the fact that he hasn’t even bothered with me
since going away hurts much more.
Frank’s eyes darken as his lips tightly sealed together, he turned around
checking the pots and stormed out the kitchen, Jesus Christ I’m such a fucking
idiot, I sighed and followed him.
“Listen Frank, I’m sorry”
“Save it kid” he sat down on the sofa, running a hand through his messy hair
“No, Frank I’m sorry I didn’t mean to shout, but the mention of Billie it just…
it hurts a lot, I mean before hell broke loose it was so perfect, just me and
him in our own world, nothing could tear us apart, well he did have a
reputation of fucking around but I always trusted him with my body and soul,
it’s just now that everything has fucked up, the rumours seems to be true,
since I was dropped off the school, we rarely had time to call each other,
either his phone is turned off or he’s ignoring my calls but I like to think
that he might have lost his phone, ya know it happens, and the only reminder of
him where those stupid paintings I had in my satchel which are all ruined now”
I finished, I didn’t realize I was crying until a tear drop snuck between my
lips leaving a salty taste behind.
Frank’s eyes have softened and he was staring at me he sighed, stood up and
walked towards me, he wrapped his small arms around my shoulders and pulled me
into a hug, “I’m sorry to hear that Gerard, but sometimes it’s good to let go
of somethings, everything happens for a reason, maybe he did indeed lose his
phone like you said it happens and maybe he didn’t maybe they were right, but
you can’t keep getting miserable over it, it’s good to let go”
My own arms found themselves wrapped around Frank’s waist pulling him closer to
me while I rested my cheek on his shoulder, “I wish it was that easy, It’s hard
to let go of almost two years”.
“You’ll eventually let go, I managed to let go of 10 years” he said pulling a
little bit away to look at me.
“and ten years is a hell of a time kid” he said, sadness filling his voice
while looking down between us. Ten years… wait, how old is Frank? Was he
married? Did it last Ten years? Oh fuck and here I thought I was having it hard
on myself, he shook his head and forced a smile back on his face, letting go of
me completely “I better go check the food” he pointed towards the kitchen I
nodded and let go off him as he slowly made his way towards the kitchen, this
is unbelievable, I followed Frank into the kitchen before I could say anything
he quickly looks up at me quickly wiping away some tears, oh shit I must have
brought him some bad memories.
“Oh shit, Frankie I’m sorry, I’m sorry for making you think about some horrible
times, I’m such a horrible person” I said walking towards him, he held his
hands up stopping.
“It’s okay it’s not your fault Gerard, It’s a long time ago anyway, I shouldn’t
be moping about it” he sniffed, patting his hand over his jeans as he checked
the pots on the stove.
I walked behind him and wrapped my own arms around his waist pulling him closer
to me, my mind is screaming to let him go that I’m over doing it yet my body
refuses to listen, he sighed and leans more into me and turns around facing me,
my eyes lock with his taking my breath away, I feel my lips tremble as I leaned
more into him, only one thing on my mind I needed to taste his lips, I felt
like my world depended on it , and I know this shouldn’t be happening not now,
is it an inappropriate moment? Or is it a good moment? All I know is my lips
are suddenly pressed against his, I can feel him stiffen a bit, but he relaxes
again and gives into the kiss, just a simple lip to lip kiss.
After a few seconds the kiss started to deepen and I could feel his tongue
brush against my lower lip as I parted my lips he pushed me away from him, his
hand reaching to his lips as he looked at me in shock.
“What the fuck?” I said as my lower back hit against the counter opposite of
him.
“Gerard, we cannot do this!” he says his hand still covering his lips
“Why not?” I whine while walking towards him closing the gap between us.
“Because you’re a minor! And I’m too old for you” he says again backing away a
little bit.
“So what? It’s not like you’re in your forties” I complained, closing the gap
much more.
“Well, no but in exactly 8 years I am” he crosses his arms together and arches
his brow.
What the fuck? He’s 31 years old, but he’s so small, so tiny, so…. Adorable yet
he’s twice my age, I back myself away from him staring at nothing behind him.
“Listen, Gerard, don’t take it the wrong way, you’re a very handsome guy but, I
cannot risk it for just onetime thing, I’ll be classed as a paedophile” he ran
his hand through his hair again.
“Not if I don’t tell anyone, and maybe it won’t be a onetime thing maybe it
will be more than a onetime thing Frankie”
“It will be a onetime thing Gerard, nobody copes to stay around me for more
than 4 months, and those were all men my age not a…a..”
“A kid, go on say it, I’m just a kid with a fucked up life who just wants to
have one thing good come out of all this” Maybe I am just a kid who wants a
onetime thing, than again I have nobody to tell I was fucked by a 32 year old.
And to be honest if it happens I’ll be coming back for more, this man he’s too
gorgeous to let go
“What about that Ten year one, that seemed promising” I said, fuck.. I regret
bringing that up, his eyes turn a dark color as he looked at me.
“That Ten year one is nothing as you think, it was all fucking fake, yea he
stayed for Ten years but only if it goes his way, you don’t know shit and why
the fuck should I tell you about my Ten years fucked up relationship?” he
yelled at me only inches away from, I could feel myself shake the more his
voice grew the more scared I got, it seems that with every word the higher his
voice got, until he punched the wall next to me, his knuckles cracking as they
met the white wall next to my head, he retreated his hand back, his knuckles
bloody, he hissed and cursed underneath his breath while reaching for a cloth
and wrapping it around his hand “This is just fucking great!” he said, while
reaching for the stove and turning the nubs all the way off he then stormed out
the room leaving me on my own thinking over and over what the fuck just
happened.
***** Chapter 9 *****
 
It’s been a couple of hours since Frank has left into his room, I’m such a
fucking idiot for persisting into his whatever ten year relationship was, I was
nothing but a stranger to him and  I shouldn’t have even kissed him let alone
talk to him that way, but who would’ve guessed he would get that upset for
mentioning it.
Finally I hear the lock of his bedroom door unlock and footsteps coming towards
me, my eyes met with his and then to his hand that was wrapped up in a white
cloth. I am still standing in the kitchen like the idiot I am and he walked
passed me turning the cooker back on and he let out a sigh.
“I’m sorry for lashing out on you like that, it’s kind of a sensitive subject
to talk about” he finally say.
“It’s okay I shouldn’t have brought it up” I reply feeling a little bit awkward
now.  
“Don’t worry about it, it’s like it never happened” he smile lightly his eyes
still full of sadness.
I nod and leaned against the counter letting out a sigh, I’ve known this guy
for two days well one to be exact and I already fucked everything up I
shouldn’t have done that move he was right I was just a kid and he was….an
adult.
We ate dinner which tasted pretty good and made small talk the air around us
thick and awkward, then it was time to get to bed, we said our goodnights and
he was back in his room leaving me on the couch. The night returned and my
illness came back, the air was cold but I was sweating like a pig, my nose was
stuffed up again which gave me trouble in breathing properly and my cough
sounded like I was a dying man with tuberculosis and no matter how much I tried
to suppress each one the worst the fit has gotten. The room was dark the only
light source was the flickering image of the television that sat in front of
the couch, there was a little clock hanging on the wall showed that it was two
in the morning and I still did not have a good shut of an eye. I sat up on the
couch trying to suppress more coughing which sounded more like a trombone, I
reached for another tissue from the nightstand and blew my nose in it trying to
get some air through the pipes but all I got was snot down my throat almost
causing me to gag, I hurriedly sat up and ran towards the bathroom  gagging
into the toilet my vision blurring, i cursed and pulled myself from the sink
rinsing my mouth with tap water;
“There’s some medicine in that cabinet, if I was you I’d take some before you’d
end up coughing your lungs out” Frank’s voice came from behind me scaring the
snot out of me, I turned around quickly looking at him, my hands gripping
against the soapstone of the skin.
“How- where- Did I wake you up?” I asked feeling shameful as I am fully aware
that my coughing fit is keeping everyone in this apartment block awake.
“I couldn’t sleep even if I want to” he said coming into the room and opening
the cabinet behind me, he took some medicine out and gave them to me then he
exited the room and a few moments later he returned with a glass full of water
“Here swallow these, they might not be strong enough to help whatever you got
there because they’re over the counter pills.” he continued i mumbled a thanks
and managed to swallow the bright yellows pills followed by another sets of
coughing.
“You need to get checked out” he said as we made our way out the bathroom and
back into the living room. “It’ll pass” I said my voice hoarse from all the
coughing before sitting down on the couch, Frank made his way towards the
kitchen turning on what from the clicking sounded like an electrical kettle. I
look around the darkroom feeling my head spin I closed my eyes and shiver
lightly at the cold sweat that went down my forehead this is a mess.
Frank came into the living room holding two mugs he set one in front of me on
the coffee table and the other next to it before he flopping down on the couch,
i still feel somehow shitty about our little argument I shouldn’t have even
dared to try what I did and although I apologized I still feel like I crossed a
certain invisible line that shouldn’t be walked over.
“Thanks for all this” I said looking over at him, he seemed tired as he looked
at me a smile on his lips. “It’s not a problem Gerard, I bet you would’ve done
the same thing”. I nodded and luckily enough there was a box of tissues on the
table, I reached and took a tissue and blew my nose in it.
“And I’m sorry for keeping you awake” I said trying not feel as shitty as I
feel about keeping him awake but to no avail I still do. He practically saved
me and here I am keeping him awake all night cause of my coughing.
“It’s no problem I’m used to staying up late with work and all” Work? Now that
peaked my interests.
“Work? What do you work as? I mean only if you want to tell me that is, don’t
want to cross another line” I said cautious as to not wanting to invade his
personal space.
He laughed a bit and relaxed more into the couch after he reached for his
coffee and took a sip. “I’m in the music industry, I play in a band and when I
found you I was coming back from a tour we just finished” I reached for my own
mug and tried to sniff the caffeine but to my luck nothing, I frowned and
sipped at the warm liquid as he spoke, in a band huh? He’s gorgeous and in a
band that explains why he had a towel and a shirt in his car. “What do you do
then? Are you the singer?” I asked he chuckled again and shook his head as if
it was the most oblivious question. “Well since I’m backing vocals means I’m
somewhat a singer” he looked at me “But I’m the guitarist”.
We spoke about his band and his guitar skills, he’s pretty passionate about his
job his band is called ‘Leathermouth’ and it’s a punk themed band, the way he
speaks about his guitar which he called ‘Pansy’ showed so much love towards the
object. He showed me his guitar which was a white les paul with PANSY stickers
on it. I talked to him about my passion for art and how when I was younger I
used to sing but gave up on that when I started smoking and to my luck Frank
offered me one of his cigarettes before retreating back saying it would totally
kill the little life I have left in my lungs, we spent the whole night talking
getting to know each other more until I somehow passed out on the couch.
***** Friday the 13th *****
Time has passed quickly at Frank’s apartment, hours turned into days and days
turned into two whole weeks, my whatever I had went away just a couple days
ago, thanks to Frank and his off counter medicine that he made sure I take them
frequently and bought more just in case it returns, and no matter how much I
protested that he needed to stop wasting his money on me he said that he will
not have a missing person die in his apartment and have to face a bigger
lawsuit at first I thought he was being serious and that maybe all the medicine
he’s pumping into my body is nothing just to get me off his back quickly, but
now it’s been a couple of days and I feel fine, no snot, no cough… okay that;s
a bit of a lie the cough is still there but not that bad thankfully Frank has
let me bum some cigarettes off him all I know is my first ever paycheck is
bound to be my way of repaying him for all of this, he even went out to buy me
some clothes, they’re not cheap nor expensive they’re okay, they’re enough for
me and the thought is all that matters.
It’s Friday night and Frank has a gig tonight and he said that if I wasn’t on
the news at all he would consider taking me with him and stay backstage till
they finish the venue but even I know that if I go I might end up being ‘found’
when that’s the last thing I need right now. Frank has been going out more this
week having band practice for this this upcoming event sometimes I miss him not
being around I mean it’s his apartment there isn’t much for me to do although
he did let me rummage through his comic book collection and his dvd which to my
luck we shared the same love for horror movies, so I spent most my nights
watching DVD’s and re-run shows on his Tv till he came back. So tonight I
settled into watching Friday the 13th, because it is a Friday night and it so
happens to be Friday the 13th, Frank made extra sure I’d have enough snacks
lying in the cupboards and being here for two whole weeks he made made feel
like it was my own home without a bedroom, but who needs a bedroom when I am
crashing on a sofa bed as comfortable as a bed?.
I was only halfway through the movie till the apartment door opened up and in
came Frank looking exhausted as always but as he saw me he smiles lightly and
sets his guitar down next to the door;
“Hey” he says closing the door behind him and looking at the Tv “Oh Friday the
13th, I love this movie and luckily it’s only halfway through it” he continued
sitting down on the sofa next to me and stealing my bowl of popcorn thats been
sitting on my thighs. “Hey to you too, you’re home early” I say glancing at the
clock and then back at him, he is earlier than usual.
He grabbed a handful of popcorn and stuffed his face with it; “Yea the boys
stopped early cause they wanted to go out and grab some drinks” .
“And you didn’t go because?” I asked looking at him, my heart always missing a
beat everytime our eyes meet and at this moment that exactly what is happening
he shrugged and threw a popcorn at me. “Because, I don’t like to think how
boring you must get all alone in this cramped up apartment so I decided to come
home and binge watch movies with you, you’re like my roommate now” he said and
this is the time I thank god the room is poorly lit cause I feel my cheeks
burning up, aweh he missed drinking out with his buddies to spend time with me,
the kid he found in the middle of nowhere. “Oh, wow thanks for the thought but
I wouldn’t mind if you went out like it’s better here, I mean if I was at
school I’ll probably be on my own in my dorm or behind a locker door” I said
frowning a bit as I turned my gaze back to the movie watching Jason Slitting
someone's throat with a chainsaw. “Yeah, about that Gerard, we seriously need
to think about getting you back to schoo-” Frank was cut off by someone banging
at the door; “HEY SHORT STUFF OPEN UP” someone could be heard yelling from the
other end as their hand kept knocking at the frame, well I hope it’s their
hand, I hear Frank curse underneath his breath and quickly stand up, pushing
the bowl back onto my hips, he quickly made his way towards the door and
hesitated for a moment before slightly opening the door. “PETE” he said trying
to sound happy to see his friend?. “What are you doing here? Weren’t you guys
suppose to be out getting drunk somewhere?” Frank said again I hear a giggle, I
suppose those are his band mates?  “Well, we did go out to the 24/7 convenience
store and bought some good non-cheap beer” another voice said this time. “Uhm
Frank, are you hiding something?” the guy who I think is Pete said, and then
Frank was pushed with the door and two man walked into his apartment I was so
confused as Frank cursed more and shook his head “Don’t you guy know what
fucking privacy is?!” he said as he closed the door shut, I tried to become
invisible like I was not there but I am not magician who can make myself
disappear both the man which were about Frank’s height looked at me shocked and
confused, one of the man had blonde hair and was rather skinny with a whole lot
tattoo’s honestly he looks like he’s another version of Frank but Frank is more
fucking gorgeous the other one was wearing glasses and his brown hair fell
against his full cheeks and he was wearing a Fedora? People are still wearing
those. “Fraaank? Who’s the handsome guy?” the blonde one asked setting one of
their paper bags on the table. “Pete don’t fucking scare the kid with your
creepiness” the other said following Pete behind. Frank looked at me a bit
panicked and walked towards them sighing. “So who is he?” blondie said dragging
a chair from the table, sat on it and dug out for I presume is a beer can in
the bags. “He looks familiar” the other said and Frank ran a hand through his
hair. “Yeah of course he looks familiar, he was on the news two week ago he’s
the run-away. FRANK why are you keeping a Run-away-”
“Frank’s a kidnapper?! How come we didn’t know that we’ve known you for so lon-
”
“Just Shut the fuck up! It’s not like that” Frank shouted over his friends
voice, I sunk on the couch and tried to hide best I really don’t know what I
should do, these people aren’t supposed to be here and they weren’t supposed to
see me.
Frank started to say how he found me in the middle of nowhere and you know how
it goes. They seemed to understand the story as they both apologised to ME for
thinking Frank kidnapped me.
“They’re a bunch of assholes Gerard, That’s Pete the weird blonde looking one
and the other is Patrick” they said Hi together and Pete dug back into the bag
and brought out a can of beer “Beer?” he said followed by Patrick slapping his
hand away “He’s a kid he’s not supposed to drink beer you fucking idiot”.
“We’ll he’s not supposed to smoke and he’s smoking so a beer won’t kill him”
Pete justified, I reached for the can, opened it with a click and brought it to
my lips, it’s not my first and it’s been a while since I tasted the bitter
taste of a good beer, I sighed at the taste and thanked them.
Through the night I found out how hyperactive Pete is, he’s like a child yet
he’s fun to hang out with, Patrick he’s more serious he’s like the balance of
them, Frank is a total different person around them he’s like Pete or it could
be the beer, also I found out that these weren’t really his bandmates just a
couple of ‘losers’ who hung out at their garage, apparently not everyone came
to visit Frank cause his apartment is too shitty. Frank is more talkative and
relaxed around them although they mostly insult each other in every possible
sentence they seem to be used to it. Well me i’m just being awkward, talking to
whoever acknowledges me and then that’s it, I never was great with big groups
and my only friend back home was brother expect  for Billie, but Billie was
another story, when we hung out we usually just stay quiet in each other’s
company we rarely spoke, unless moaning and cursing is a form of conversation
than yes we did that, but no so much only when we had the chance. Thinking
about it now our relationship was nothing but dull, in public we acted like
we’re just friends.. Then again we rarely went out in public… A snap of fingers
in front of my face brought be back to the real world from my thoughts they
were Franks and he looked different?, his eyes were barely open and he had a
dopey smile in his other hand he had a rolled up cigarette in it and brought it
to my direction “I...know I may regret this in the morning be-cau-se I am an
adult, but you seem tense here have some” he said his words slurring, he was
swinging in his chair and then the smell hit me, it wasn’t tobacco what they
were smoking this was something else, something I’ve tried before so I knew
exactly it’s effects but smoking and drinking that’s just...something I never
did. I looked around the room and Pete matched Frank right now he too was
having trouble trying to stay still from swaying but he kept giggling every now
and then, and Patrick boy Patrick was throwing daggers at Frank his piercing
look and scowl could cut someone’s hand off. “Frank, don’t fucking dare do this
he’s a kid it’s bad that he smokes and he’s drinking you can’t give him a
spliff” Patrick protested trying to smack the roll up from Frank’s hand, Frank
in his state was faster and everytime Patrick missed he would stick his tongue
out at him and giggle with blondie in the back in a hysterical laughing fit. I
reached for his hand and took the roll up and brought it to my lips “ I can
make my own choices I’m not twelve I’m fifteen for crying out loud I’ll be
legal in a few months” I said and Frank smiled at fedora hat dude and called
him a party pooper, I brought the burning roll up to my lips and exhaled, the
toxins from the natural plant filling my lungs and immediately relaxed my body,
I could tell it was not synthetic I could feel my lips going numb while I
passed the joint back to Frank his smile never leaving his face as he took a
drag himself;
“I am thinking, we are passing the joint between us three does that mean we’re
making out?” Pete says his eyes wide, I frowned and Frank did so,”I am thinking
how much of a fucking idiot you are” Frank replies blowing the smoke through
his nose looking at Patrick “Come on man, loosen up a bit take a drag and relax
stop trying to be reeeesponsiiible” Frank continued leaning against the table
and waved the roll up in front of Pat’s face, Pat looked at me and then sighed
taking the thing and joining the party.
Pete kept going on about how we are basically kissing one and other from
smoking from the same cigarette because according to his scientific
calculations we’re exchanging saliva and that’s what happens when you make out
with someone which caused Frank to shiver and say that the last person he
wanted to kiss on earth was him.
Time went by slowly yet so fast and Frank’s friends decided it was time to
leave by that time my body was already searching for something to huddle up
against, I had one of the couch pillows hugged tightly against my chest but it
wasn’t enough I felt like I needed something bigger, Frank plopped down on the
couch next to me and rested his head against the back of the couch then he
looked at me and smiled “I feel so fuzzy” he said and laughed, I laughed too
and agreed with him cause so do I, looking at him isn’t helping my state right
now and I knew that some pot has weird side effects to it and I know those side
effects are the ones I was not prepared for tonight especially when you’re
sitting next to an incredible drop dead gorgeous man who is twice your age. I
felt the couch shift underneath me and then felt something against my thigh I
looked down and noticed that Frank was incredibly close right now his thigh
touching mine, I gazed up at him and he was still staring at me his eyes
sparkling;
“You have no idea the self control I have right now” he spoke again and I
couldn’t help but bite down on my own lips cause that self control is something
I am dealing with it. “You look so innocent so fragile and there are so many
things going through my head right now that even if you were an adult in the
eyes of law they would deem my thoughts fucking illegal” he continued, his eyes
never leaving mine.
“And what are those things?” I asked feeling my heart starting to beat faster
in my chest as he inched a little closer to me, he bit his own bottom lip and
 his eyes scattered down and up my body; “You’d like to know huh?” he raised
his eyebrows, his voice full of lust and his eyes darkening and fuck yea I want
to know, my body is burning to know what he wants to do, and as much as I feel
drunk and high off my socks I can still know that ever since I’ve laid my eyes
on this stranger/roommate now is that I wanted him to just have his way with
me. I smirked and cocked my own eyebrow at him; “Of course I do, there is no
harm in saying stuff”, his smile turned into a smirk and turned himself looking
at me “how about I show you?” and before I knew his lips were onto mine again
sending waves of emotions down and up my body, his hand snaked onto my hair
lightly tugging on it and instead of pulling back he depend the kiss, his
tongue dancing with mine and that’s when I knew there was no turning back from
this.
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