Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/4697699. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Choose_Not_To_Use_Archive_Warnings, No_Archive_Warnings_Apply, Underage Category: M/M Fandom: cashton_-_Fandom, 5SOS, 5_Seconds_of_Summer Relationship: Cashton_-_Relationship, Calum_Hood_x_Ashton_Irwin Character: Calum_Hood, Ashton_Irwin, Mali_Koa_Hood, Luke_Hemmings, Michael_Clifford Additional Tags: Smut Stats: Published: 2015-08-31 Completed: 2015-09-03 Chapters: 4/4 Words: 2265 ****** She's Not You ****** by Nerd_Cake Summary "She looks like you. She talks like you. She even smells like you. But baby, she ain't you." Calum and Ashton hooked up in the past, but now Ashton is with Calum's sister, and he feels there is nothing he can do about the feelings he has for Ashton. Until one night, things take a drastic turn for change. ***** Chapter 1 ***** The last time Calum saw Ashton was outside of his house. His nose was stifled from the cold and he was telling Ashton how much he liked his company. Ashton had smiled cutely and told Calum he'd like to see him again. But Calum didn't get his number. He didn't have one. Although Calum gave him his, he never heard from Ashton again. It hurt to know that it was just a one night stand. Calum thought they really could have had something. That was almost six months ago, and although it had been half a year, Calum still remembered everything he'd learned about Ashton that night. His favorite bands, and how he felt about Vegemite. Although Calum thought Vegemite was gross he laughed that morning when Ashton moaned into his toast. "Cal? Snap out of it!" Calum looked up at Michael squinting at him. "I was having a very pleasant daydream, Michael. You ruined it." Michael scoffed. "Yeah, well it was that or you'd have gotten run over." Calum looked up at the street. "Oh...I forgot where we were." Michael sighed. "Wish I could do that." He muttered before walking across the school parking lot and towards the front doors. Calum agreed with him grudgingly following him inside the school. High school sucked major dick. ^*^*^ Calum flicked a lettuce leaf off of Luke's plate and he glared at him. "What? You weren't eating it anyway." Michael leans into Luke closing his eyes. Everyone looks so tired. It's scary. It's like sitting at a table full of zombies. Calum just glared at Michael and Luke being all over each other. Although they were, they were not together. Calum knew that they liked each other, but neither of them had the balls to admit it. "What? What did I do?" Luke asked noticing Calum's stone cold glare. Michael looked up at Calum expressing his confusion as well. "Can you guys just suck face already? I'm really tired of this...flirting routine you have going on." Luke's eyes blew wide, and Michael stared probably waiting to see how Luke would react. His face was red and he looked like he'd been put on the spot. "What are you talking about?" He gasped. Calum rolled his eyes looking to Michael. "Really?" Michael bit his lip. Luke noticed and seemed to relax, but he was still hella confused. Had Calum just set them up? He groaned. "I just wanna be happy with somebody, why can't I find a cute boy to cuddle me?" Calum whined. Michael giggled. "You wanna cuddle?" Calum cringed at him. "No, not when your Luke's sloppy seconds." Luke's jaw dropped. "How'd you-" Michael slapped a hand over his mouth. "What?" Calum asked confused. Michael glared at Luke, and Calum frowned.p> ***** Chapter 2 ***** Calum toed his shoes off as soon as he made it inside. His bag was thrown carelessly aside as he made his way to the kitchen. He sang along to the sound of Second Hand Serenade playing through his ear buds. The volume was up so loud he hardly heard the voice behind him. "I don't understand why you aren't famous yet. Maybe you should audition for Australia's Got Talent or something." Calum groaned, exasperated hearing Mali's voice. Pulling a carton of ice cream from the freezer he turned around. "Shut up." Mali just grinned as Calum's eyes landed on the figure in the doorway. Calum gulped seeing his expression. He looked horrified. "W-who's this?" Calum asked instead of blowing his cover. Mali smiled. "This is who I told you about. Ashton, remember? My boyfriend?" Calum's chest ached. "Oh." He said painfully. "You okay? You're turning white..." Calum nodded turning around to throw the ice cream back in the freezer. "Just...feeling a little sick to my stomach." Calum said brushing past the tall boy he never thought he would see again. His curls were a little longer that last Calum had seen, but his green eyes were still hidden behind glasses. "Nice to finally meet you, Ashton. I'm Calum." He said blandly before leaving the room. "That was weird." He heard Mali Say as he went upstairs. She had no idea. *^* "Where is it you work, Ashton?" Calum knew the answer, but he kept it to himself. He picked at his broccoli in disgust. Ashton's voice made his insides feel like peeling bark. Some pieces just weren't ready to peel and hurt like hell. Even Calum didn't understand what he was thinking. "You okay, Cal?" His mother asked. Everyone looked to him. "Just...Michael and Luke finally told me they were...hooking up." His mom made a face. "Really? How's that make you feel?" Calum frowned. "I'm really happy for them." Mali scoffed. "Then why do you look so upset?" Calum looked to his sister avoiding Ashton's eyes. "I just wish I could find someone...you know...like you did." Calum finally looked at Ashton, but he wouldn't meet his gaze. Calum was teeming with anger. Why wouldn't he look him in the face. "May I be excused?" Calum asked through the silence. "'Course, sweetie." Calum was gone before she even finished speaking. Maybe he could stop thinking about it when he got to his room. He was wrong. As soon as the door shut it felt like a three story building had been dropped on him. Everything hurt, and Calum wanted to cry. He fought back the anger he had towards his friends and called Michael. He needed a cuddle. Even if he was Luke's sloppy seconds. Calum just wanted to feel like he wasn't so alone, or maybe he just wanted to feel like he wasn't some blow up sex doll Ashton stabbed with a knife. ***** Chapter 3 ***** Michael pulled Calum closer as they lay on the couch. "He's a dick, forget about him." Michael muttered, but in the back of his mind, he knew Calum wouldn't. And he knew why as well. Ashton was the second most attractive person Michael had seen in all his life, and he was cute. Michael heard his giggle when he came into the house. He's also heard Calum's horrible sob. Michael had thought he was dying. Calum seemed to feel that way. "It's not the end of the world you know. And remember you're missing out on the bad stuff too. Fights suck when you're in a relationship." Michael said. Calum scoffed. "But you and Luke argue all the time over stupid shit, you always get over it, or you probably have make up sex or something." Michael sighed. "Stop talking about it, or you'll give me a boner." Calum groaned. "I really hate you guys." Michael laughed. "If it makes you feel any better, Luke was really beat up about not telling you, and also blurting it out..." Calum looked up at him, his face flushed, and his eyes puffy. "Really?" "Oh, Calum." Michael said sympathetically. Calum cringed hiding back in his neck. "Stop feeling bad for me. Just...hold me until I forget." Michael sighed. "You know replacing this feeling of loneliness with my cuddles, as much as I like the idea, is not going to work." Calum sobbed. "I know but it makes me feel better." Mali's voice made Calum jump. "Awe, you guys. Calum it's okay." She patted his back, but Calum flinched away. Michael turned them over seeing it. Calum had told him everything over the phone. "Don't touch my kiwi, bitch." Michael growled. Mali just laughed ruffling his messy blonde hair. Calum was still waiting for the green Michael had promised him. "Oh, stop being so possessive Michael. Nobody likes that." "I do." Calum tensed. "Ass." Michael muttered under his breath. "What?" Calum looked up seeing Ashton looking very confused. He nearly looked upset, until he noticed Calum was crying. "C-Calum, are you okay?" It was the first time Ashton had said his name since that night. Calum felt crushed. Michael pulled him tighter against him as he cried. "What's going on?" Mali looked up at her mother and smiled sadly, concern dripping from her expression. "Cal's depressed or something." Calum sniffed. "Screw you, Mali. My cat died." "Since when did you have a-" Michael cleared his throat. "We found him...he'd been staying at my place. Luke, Cal, and I had been taking care of him, but sadly he passed last night." Michael was such a great liar. Calum was so grateful that they were friends. "I'm so sorry Michael. But Calum, is this really affecting you that much?" Michael laughed. "Well, I also told him about Luke being beat up about the stuff today, so... It's just been a really shitty day." Calum kicked him for cursing at his mother. Grateful as he was, it was disrespectful. "Can everyone just go away please?" Calum grumbled. "I'll see you later babe." Calum tensed mentally and physically cringing as he heard a smack of lips. When the door shut he sagged into Michael, who huffed. "Thank god, it's over." Calum whimpered. "Not for me." ***** Chapter 4 ***** Chapter Notes WARNING: CHAPTER = VERY EXPLICIT!!! Calum had avoided going home all week, and for good reason. It seemed Ashton had made it a habit to come over almost every other day. Mali seemed to not mind at all. She had even tried to talk to Calum about how intense their relationship had gotten. "It was liked, he became more intimate after coming over, you know?" Calum almost threw up on his dinner plate. "Everything is so much more...intense." Calum stood up from the table with his plate and headed up to his room. He slammed the door shut and nearly broke the plate putting it on his dresser. He was sick an tired of Mali going on about Ashton. After all, Calum knew how good he was in bed. And he'd almost blurted it out on a number of occasions. But he wouldn't hurt his sister. She was happy with Ashton, and Calum wanted her to be happy. If only he could be happy too. Calum's phone lit up with a message from Michael saying that he couldn't come over tonight. Calum groaned, knowing he couldn't sneak over to Luke's because, the last time he tried, Liz caught him. Liz was strict when it came to school nights. Calum could never stay over. So Calum sat in his desk chair and prayed no one came up to bother him. *^* Calum was hot. In more ways than one. He had tried so hard to forget about that night, that he couldn't stop thinking about it. Ashton's smooth skin, clear of any tattoos. His sweat damp curls sticking to his forehead as his body worked- Calum whimpered thinking about his muscles flexing with every push of his hips. He couldn't stop his hand from having a mind of it's own. Couldn't stop it from slipping into his sweats. He didn't have the strength to stop his fingers from pressing tight against his entrance. "Oh, god..." Calum gasped. It was late, and everyone in the house seemed to be sleeping. Even Mali. Calum had seen her lights go out almost an hour ago. Maybe thinking of Ashton with Mali would help him cool down. No. It made it worse. It made Calum remember even more. Remember the way Ashton had whispered to him about how perfect he was. The way he held onto him like he was all that mattered in the world. It was more than enough to make Calum discard his sweat pants, and his All Time Low t-shirt. Calum couldn't help but think that Ashton never held her like that, never fucked her like that. Against himself, he liked the thought. Against himself whimpered out Ashton's name as he pressed his fingers inside. He loved the burn of the stretch, and he wanted more. He wanted Ashton, his thick cock. Calum moaned remembering how Ashton got so worried when he hissed, but when Calum told him how much he liked it Ashton lost control. "Fuck..." He whined propping himself up against his headboard. He didn't even want to touch himself. He wanted to cum untouched. Untouched and at the thought of Ashton. Calum's chest ached though because, he knew how pathetic he was. He knew Ashton would never be his. But he had him once, and maybe that would cut it for now. Maybe this was just weird, and he'd break his sisters heart if she knew he loved Ashton. Calum gasped. He loved Ashton? How could he? His sister was dating him...he'd hardly known him a day. He hardly let Ashtonfuckhim in a day. "Nngh..Ashton," Calum moaned letting his thoughts slip from his subconscious and letting pleasure take over. He didn't care anymore. He felt the way he did for Ashton, and there was nothing he could do about it. He wouldn't deny himself the fact either. Strong hands found Calum's waist and he flinched. "It's me...I'm here." Ashton whispered into Calum's ear tracing it's shell with his tongue. Calum shivered as Ashton kissed his skin. "This isn't real..." Calum whispered. "I hope it is..." Ashton mumbled nipping at Calum's skin and pulling his fingers away. Calum whimpered from the loss, but sucked Ashton's long fingers into his mouth when he placed the tips to his swollen lips. Calum hadn't realized he's been biting them so much. "Mali?" Calum asked when Ashton took his fingers back slick with saliva. He didn't hesitate to push them in. "She's sleeping, don't worry." Choked sounds left Calum's throat, but he didn't care. Because, Ashton was touching him. And even if it wasn't real, it felt real. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!