Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/8689075.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Fire_Emblem:_If_|_Fire_Emblem:_Fates
  Relationship:
      Leon_|_Leo/Zero_|_Niles
  Character:
      Zero_|_Niles, Leon_|_Leo, Other(s)
  Additional Tags:
      Origin_Story, Flashbacks, Angst, Poverty, Starvation
  Series:
      Part 2 of Court_of_Hounds
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-11-29 Updated: 2016-12-15 Chapters: 2/? Words: 2893
****** Sewer Rat ******
by Piinutbutter
Summary
     As Niles settles into a comfortable life with his lord, his mind
     grows clearer, and bits and pieces of his past begin to return to
     him.
     He really wishes they wouldn’t.
***** Chapter 1 *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
“Oh. That’s...unpleasant.”
Niles hummed a wordless agreement, staring at the unpleasant scene in one of
the castle’s training fields. The corpse of a large dog was baking in the
unusually grueling midday heat, the rare bright sun giving them a lovely view
of the innards spilling out from its picked-open stomach. Noisy black birds
fluttered around the body, enjoying the feast.
“Crows are such morbid creatures.” Leo mused.
“True.” Niles muttered. “But they can be helpful, sometimes.”
“How so?” Leo walked past the weapons rack.
“Well, where there are scavengers, there must be food to scavenge. If you can
follow a group of crows before they take everything for themselves, sometimes
you can find a nice carcass to chow down on.”
The prince’s lip curled in distaste. “I can’t imagine a crow’s meal being
anything pleasant.”
“It’s usually not. But a hungry child doesn’t need pleasant, he needs food.”
Leo lowered his voice as they made their way to the center of the field, far
from the smell of the corpse. “I’m sorry, Niles.”
His butler waved it off. “The past is the past. Besides, I’ll have you know
dead dog is actually rather tasty, once you can get it over a fire.”
“That’s disgusting.”
“But you want the big dogs,” he continued, gesturing enthusiastically, “With
plenty of meat on their bones. None of those little yappy toys that rich women
cart around to show they can afford to feed another mouth. Cats have the same
problem. Taking off all that fur is a pain in the ass for such little edible
payoff.”
“Niles.”
“Birds are in the middle. Annoying to pick clean, but they’re pretty tasty, and
far more common than finding a whole dog or cat. But all of those are
delicacies compared to the time when I had to eat worms.”
“Niles.” Leo squeezed his arm. “As fascinating and stomach-turning as this is,
I would like to get some training done before we both suffer from heatstroke.”
“Right.” Niles bowed in apology. “Sorry, my lord. I got a bit caught up there.”
Leo smiled. “Don’t apologize.” Before Niles could respond, there was lightning
crackling close to his ear. “Just do your best to kill me.”
He no longer accompanied Leo on missions of battle, but there was nothing that
said he couldn’t help him train in the castle. The little prince was growing
deadlier with his tomes with every passing day, and Niles had to pour every
ounce of his concentration into dodging his attacks, in between trying to land
some of his own.
So it was dangerous, how much the crows were distracting him. He tried to focus
on predicting his prince’s next attack, but every time he heard one of their
short, shrill cries, his head darted over to the animal’s carcass again. It was
hypnotizing, the way they hopped lazily around the body, pecking and pecking
and pecking at it. Niles couldn’t keep himself from staring. It made a strange
feeling well in his stomach, one he couldn’t quite place. It felt almost like
he was-
-hungry, and he was cold, and he was hurt, and he didn’t want to die.
For most of the years to come, Niles wouldn’t care whether he lived or died. He
told himself he would never actively seek death - not consciously, at least -
but when it approached, he wouldn’t try to run.
But now, Niles was a child who wanted nothing more than to live.
Winter was merciless. Nohr was already a cold place without the shifting
seasons to make life harder on those without a home to shelter them from the
deadly chill. Niles was young enough to still have some sort of conscience
about theft. He tried to live off the scraps of waste that came from the rest
of society, instead of taking the good parts for himself. It was taking a toll
on his small body.
And he was small. The lack of proper nutrition had turned his bones brittle and
stunted his growth. It felt like the strong gusts of freezing wind could pick
him up and carry him away. He huddled inside his poor excuse for a coat in a
narrow alley. The wind couldn’t reach him here. But the cold did, and the
hunger did, and the hunger was worse.
Several days ago, Niles had worried about freezing to death. He’d tried to
sneak into every abandoned-looking building that he could find, but it had
always ended up with him getting run off by the inevitable squatters that had
already claimed the shelters as their own. And, with all his energy dedicated
to finding shelter, finding food fell to the wayside.
Niles was always starving, but tonight, in a dark, freezing alley, the reality
hit him that he was about to die.
His body wasn’t working the way it should. For the last few days, he’d been
constantly thirsty, no matter how much snow and ice he let melt in his mouth.
His heartbeat was off. It was so, so hard to move his body. Between the pain
and the dizziness, he couldn’t stand up to even try and find something to eat.
And the alley he was going to die in had already taken another of his kind.
The body at the end of the alley was a girl, Niles could tell that much. She
couldn’t have been much older than him. Niles thought she might have been alive
when he sat wordlessly down a few feet away from her, a couple days ago (was it
a couple? maybe just one), but he couldn’t be sure. Reality was a hard thing to
keep track of when your mind didn’t want to do anything but shut down.
Gods, he was so, so cold.
At least he had company. Well, more company than the dead girl. A small pack of
crows had caught wind of the carrion, and they’d fluttered down into the alley
to eat their own dinner.
Niles was jealous of them.
But then, maybe this was a blessing in disguise. He couldn’t go look for food,
so food had come to him. He just needed to reach out and catch it. He had a
knife, one he’d found on the side of the road. It was a small, slightly bent,
mostly dull thing spotted with rust, but it was a knife. He reached into his
pocket slowly, carefully, both because of the pain the movement caused him, and
to avoid startling the birds.
He was too hungry to afford that.
One of the crows hopped towards him. In tiny increments, only moving an inch or
two with every movement, but it was coming his way.
It knew he would be next.
Gritting his teeth, Niles put all his energy into grabbing at the bird. He
missed, of course he missed, and the crow fluttered away, along with its
friends.
No matter. There was still something he could eat.
Niles dragged himself over to the girl’s body, his knife held in one trembling
hand. The cold air stabbed at his lungs when he took a deep breath and-
-cried out, stumbling forward as pain ripped through his shoulder.
“Niles!” Leo’s voice shocked him out of his memory. “Are you alright?”
Right. He’d been mock-fighting with the strongest mage he’d ever known, and
he’d let himself drift off like an idiot.
“I’m fine, my lord.” He gasped, pressing a hand to the wound Leo’s spell had
torn open on his shoulder. He pulled a vulnerary out of his pocket with the
other hand, and went about patching himself up. “I was distracted. I apologize
for my carelessness.”
Leo grabbed the vulnerary from him. “Let me. I did notice you were clumsier
than usual.”
“Just, ah, thinking.”
“Well, maybe don’t think so much in the middle of a battle, next time.” Leo
pulled his chin down, placed a quick kiss on his lips. “I don’t mind healing
you a bit, but I don’t want to kill you on accident.”
“That implies you’re fast enough to kill me in the first place.” Niles teased,
his cocky smile beginning to come back.
“You know I am.”
“Prove it. I promise I won’t think, this time.”
Chapter End Notes
     / o v o / I said this universe wasn't over, and this is a project
     I've been picking at throughout the past month. j_marquis did not
     work with me on this story, however (and I fear my Leo writing just
     doesn't measure up to his, tragically).
     As you can tell by the warnings, this is going to contain some dark
     stuff. It's all about the terrible things done to, by, and around
     Niles in his life, so be aware that it isn't going to be any form of
     sunshine and rainbows. I will add more tags as the story goes on.
     However, these are all flashbacks in the context of the story, so
     Niles already has his happy ending, in case you were worried about
     that. (I know I have a thing about sad endings. I just can't deal
     with 'em, y'all.)
     Anyway, I do hope this is enjoyed by those of you who liked Court of
     Hounds! (Or new readers, welcome aboard!)
***** Chapter 2 *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
“They say that every scar tells a story.”
Niles’ eye opened at the comment, and the feeling of thin fingers ghosting over
a cluster of the deepest scars on his back. Leo loved to explore his body, and
Niles didn’t mind. Certainly not when he was naked and lying face-down on the
prince’s bed, with said prince sitting on top of him and running his hands
along his back as a prelude to much more pleasurable things.
“I’m curious.” Leo murmured. “About these.”
“Ah, those?” Niles shifted, and he had a moment of gratitude for the fact that
Leo couldn’t see his face well. “Nasty, aren’t they? I’ve been in my fair share
of rough battles. Some bastard happened to catch me off guard. Painful, but
nothing out of the ordinary, on the battlefield.”
“Niles.” Leo sighed. “I’m not that naive. These are whip scars.”
“...So they are.” Niles admitted, quietly.
There was a pause. “I won’t force you to talk about them, but...”
“No, it’s fine.” Niles stared at the bedsheets, and reminded himself that he
really needed to get better at tucking them in. They were crooked. “They’re
nothing unusual. If anything, it was a good lesson for little Niles: Don’t get
caught.”
He could hear the frown in his prince’s voice. “How old were you? This type of
punishment isn’t supposed to be used on children. It’s in our laws.”
Niles laughed, only a little bitter. “I don’t even know how old I am now. But
with all due respect, my lord, you should know better than to trust the
authorities to follow their own rules.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault.”
They’d had that exact exchange so many times. But until Leo stopped apologizing
for parts of Niles’ past that he had no real control over, Niles refused to let
him think that he should have to.
They were both quiet for a minute, and Niles let his eye close again as Leo’s
finger traced the scars. His prince broke the silence first.
“They’re beautiful.”
He smiled, just a small one. “Is that your royal decree?”
“Absolutely.”
The way Leo was lingering on the scars told Niles he still wanted to hear the
full story behind them. All Niles had to do was say no, and his prince would
never bother him about it again, but somehow, he didn’t want to say no.
He shifted beneath Leo’s warm weight and traced the folds of the top bedsheet
with his fingertip. “Would you like to know about them?”
“If and only if you wish to share.”
He took a short breath in, and took a longer time breathing it out. “Well, I-”
-had survived the winter, by living off of food that made his chest hurt when
he thought about it. But his world was looking up: The snow was melting, the
sun was out, and Niles was bidding farewell to his conscience.
Maybe he would have kept it, had the scene not been so tempting. Everything was
so perfect, every little detail of the situation falling into place to make
Niles stray from the few rules that he still clung to on the knowledge that if
he died, at least he would die a good person.
(Liar. He was a coward who clung to life because he was afraid. He certainly
didn't have anything else to live for.)
The setting: A bustling mid-day market in the heart of town. The worst of
winter had uncurled its fist from around the place, and the vendors were
celebrating with what amounted to an impromptu festival, each one excited to
regain the profits that had dwindled during the coldest months, no doubt.
The characters: Obviously, there was Niles himself, barefoot and filthy and
hiding at the edges of the streets so that he wasn’t trampled by passerby that
had trained themselves not to look down, to avoid making eye contact with
beggars like him. But, more importantly, there was the woman who ran a bread
stall. Niles latched onto her appearance: She was short and fat, her cheeks
round and rosy and her apron straining around her waist. She wasn’t hurting for
food. She wouldn’t suffer if a tiny bit of her inventory went missing. She had
probably never known hunger a day in her life.
The object of interest: A small, round, fresh loaf of bread, sitting on the
very corner of the stall’s counter, placed primly on a twee pink cloth. Niles
could smell it, from where he was standing. Perhaps not that loaf in
particular, but all of the bread. It smelled like warmth and happiness and home
and all of those things Niles didn’t have. But mostly, as his aching stomach
reminded him, it smelled like food.
He needed it.
Niles tried to talk himself out of it: He didn’t need it. He only wanted it.
There were other ways to feed himself. He didn’t need to do this.
But, no. No, he absolutely needed this very particular loaf of bread. Nothing
else would do.
So he waited, and he watched. The actual act was so easy, once he worked up the
courage to stride confidently out of the alley and blend into the crowd. He was
just another street urchin, walking with everyone else, stopping by the bread
stall when the vendor’s back was turned, casually brushing the loaf with his
hand, sticking his hands in his pockets because after all there was still a bit
of a chill in the air, walking with everyone else, passing a few other stalls
before ducking back into a different alley.
His heart was beating out of his chest, even as he ate the bread faster than he
had eaten anything in his life, aiming to destroy any incriminating evidence.
Someone must have noticed him. This was wrong, and everyone knew he was doing
something wrong, and something terrible would happen to him.
But nothing did. The afternoon turned into evening which turned into night, and
no one had come for him. And even though he’d eaten the loaf of bread quickly
enough to make himself sick, it had been the greatest thing he’d ever tasted.
From then on, the progression was simple. It all revolved around food, at
first: Learn how to steal food. Learn how to pickpocket the people on the
street to get money to buy more food.
Then there was the night when Niles, for the first time in his life, had enough
money to buy a very, very small meal for himself, and ended up with a little
money left over. That, of course, got him thinking about all the other things
you could get with money. Clothes, clothes were a big one. Maybe some medicine
to help with all of the aches and pains that he’d learned to live with?
Medicine was expensive, but all that meant was that Niles had to aim bigger.
He aimed too big.
The noblewoman had been asking for pickpockets, walking around with her pouch
just tied to her waist like that, bouncing ostentatiously against her hip with
every step she took. She was too busy chatting with her butler to even notice
the child brushing just beside her, reaching out with small, on-their-way-to-
nimble fingers to cut the flimsy ribbon that connected her to her money.
Or so he thought.
He wasn’t as small and fragile as he’d once been - his body had gladly taken
the sudden steady influx of food and used it to fuel a belated growth spurt -
but Niles felt very young and very vulnerable with the noblewoman’s hand nearly
crushing his bony wrist, her beady eyes glaring down at him.
She cried out for the authorities, and even without the butler to corroborate
her claim, the guards would have taken Niles away anyway. Niles saw it in the
way they looked at him, the simultaneous apathy and disdain in their faces.
Young and uneducated as he was, Niles knew nothing about the way Nohr’s systems
of justice were supposed to be run. He just assumed it was normal when they-
“-dragged me, kicking and screaming...Leo?”
His prince had been listening quietly all through his story, but now he had
reached for Niles’ hands, squeezing them tightly in his own.
“It’s alright. I can guess the rest for myself.” His thumb pressed against
Niles’ knuckles. “I’m sorry I pried.”
Niles craned his neck to smile at him. Really, the memory wasn’t that bad,
compared to some that he didn’t want to think about. It was painful, but that
was all. Physical pain was a fleeting thing, in the scheme of things. “Aww, and
I was just getting into the storyteller mood. I could add some dramatic
elements of fiction into the tale, if you like. Have a dragon swoop in and
rescue me at the last minute?”
Leo’s lips might have curled, just a bit. “Or a handsome prince.”
“Ooh, excellent suggestion, my lord. So, as I was on my way to meet my fate, a
dashing and handsome prince from a far off land happened to be riding into
town, that day...”
Chapter End Notes
     Guess who forgot to update last week? It's me. I forgot to update
     last week. Oops.
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