Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/236831.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Homestuck
  Relationship:
      John_Egbert/Karkat_Vantas
  Character:
      John_Egbert, Karkat_Vantas, Sollux_Captor
  Series:
      Part 2 of Trust_In_Me
  Stats:
      Published: 2011-08-08 Words: 6712
****** Rebuilding Trust ******
by Miko
Summary
     Trolls are aggressive and have a lot of sharp edges. Humans are
     fragile, and usually don't enjoy pain. This will not end well, unless
     Karkat can bring himself to trust John.
Notes
     This is a sequel to 'A Matter of Trust', though I did try to write it
     such that you could appreciate it on its own. I wanted a chance to
     explore how the horn-submission issue would affect sex, and also a
     chance to have some bloodplay. They worked out well together. ^_^
The sharp, metallic tang of blood burst over Karkat's tongue, and he shuddered
in pleasure even as he swore silently to himself. Tasting blood meant he'd gone
too far, broken John's ridiculously fragile skin, and he needed to pull back
now.
But instinct was too strong, and Karkat couldn't stop himself from sinking his
teeth deeper still, tongue lapping eagerly at the warm fluid.
"Nnh, ow, ow Karkat, stop!" John protested, squirming in pain and shoving at
Karkat's shoulders.
Cursing viciously under his breath, Karkat finally managed to get his brain
back in control of his body, and backed off. "Sorry, I'm sorry," he mumbled.
Without thinking about it he licked his lips, and a low whine escaped him when
he tasted the blood again.
"Just... just take it easy," John tried to soothe him, running his hands up and
down Karkat's back. They were sitting on the human's bed, shirtless, and until
that moment it had been the most successful make-out session they'd managed to
have.
Panting, Karkat tried desperately to get ahold of himself. Blood ruled so much
of the life of a troll; even between matesprits spilling it during sex was
expected, almost necessary to the process. But humans were so stupidly frail,
and their reaction to even the most minor of pains seemed to be one hundred
percent negative. Even when he was being careful, Karkat still always managed
to hurt John somehow.
"Lay back, relax," John urged him. "Let me control things, maybe that will
work."
"Yeah, ok," Karkat agreed. He'd have agreed to just about anything that would
mean John would continue instead of pulling away like he usually did when
Karkat got too rough. Clenching his fists in the sheets to stop himself from
clawing at John, Karkat laid back against the soft pillows and took deep
breaths, trying to force his muscles to relax.
John leaned in and kissed him again. They'd done this enough times that the
human had long since gotten over his shyness, and John licked and nibbled at
Karkat's lips with enthusiasm. Karkat could barely feel the blunt teeth on his
much tougher skin, but what he could feel was amazing.
He kissed back, fiercely controlling the urge to bite. Their tongues met in the
middle, Karkat's curling around John's and John pushing back against him.
Then John shoved himself up and swung his leg over Karkat's thighs, so he was
straddling Karkat. Their groins ground together, and they both gasped. Karkat
could feel something hard, like a bone bulge but longer and rounder, rubbing
against the mound of his bulge.
"Fuck, John," Karkat cried out, his voice breaking on the words as his windtube
started to close. They'd never gone this far, never allowed contact below the
waist, both because of John's continued skittishness about being 'homosexual'
and because Karkat could never stop himself from ruining everything by hurting
John somehow.
If letting John take control meant they would finally get somewhere, Karkat
swore to himself that he would damn well lie there and take it. Forever, if
need be.
"Mmm, yeah okay, that's good," John babbled against his mouth. "Fuck, Karkat,
that feels so... yeah."
He pulled back, and Karkat opened his mouth to object, but the only sound that
emerged was a low, drawn-out warble as John fastened his flat teeth over a
chunk of Karkat's neck.
His back arched and he dug his claws into the fabric until he felt it giving
way. "Harder," he hissed, both a plea and a command. "Fuck, John, harder."
John bit down harder, but the contact still felt tentative. Karkat squirmed,
rubbing their groins again, and was rewarded with an increase in pressure. It
wasn't nearly enough, dull force without the bright star of pain and hot spill
of blood. It was the worst kind of tease, promising ecstasy and not delivering.
"More," he begged, breathless.
Pressure continued to increase until suddenly it was pain, sensation shooting
along his nerves and making him keen with the intense pleasure.
He didn't realize that he'd let go of the sheets to clutch at John until the
sound of the human's frantic cries penetrated the static rushing through his
think pan. Belatedly Karkat registered the feel of soft flesh giving way
beneath his fingers, his claws digging in hard enough that he could feel warm
liquid welling up around his fingertips.
"Fuck," Karkat exclaimed, and pushed John away from him. He scrambled back,
wedging himself into the corner at the head of the bed, literally sitting on
his hands. Both so that he wouldn't be tempted to grab John again, and so that
he wouldn't see the enticing blood smeared over his claws. It was bad enough
looking at the little patches of candy red that were spreading over John's
side, tiny spots that perfectly matched the placement of Karkat's fingers.
"I'm sorry," John blurted out, miserable. He explored the damage, wincing as he
touched the bloody spots. "Really, Karkat, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to go too
far..."
"Too far?" Karkat repeated, dazed. The rapid emotional ups and downs provoked
by a make out session with John always left him a little stunned, and made it
hard to think. "What the fuck are you apologizing for, idiot?"
"For biting too hard," John said. There was real distress in his voice and
expression, and he was cringing from Karkat as if he expected the troll to hit
him. "Isn't that why you clawed me, to get me to stop? It seemed like you were
enjoying it, but then suddenly you grabbed at me."
"What? No, idiot, that wasn't..." Taking a deep breath, Karkat closed his eyes
for a moment and struggled for control. He needed to be able to say this at
least relatively coherently. He'd have rubbed at his face, except that he knew
bringing his bloody hands anywhere near his mouth was not going to help the
situation.
When he opened his eyes again, he fixed John with as firm a stare as he could
manage. "You didn't go too far. I'm honestly not sure you could, as dull as
your teeth and claws are. That felt fucking amazing, the first time you've
managed to do it right, and the only thing that would have made it better was
if you'd bitten harder."
"If I'd bitten you any harder, you'd be bleeding," John protested, reaching out
to touch the spot on Karkat's neck. The contact made a tiny thrill of pain run
down Karkat's spine, and he shuddered as a soft chirp escaped him.
"Yesssss, exactly the point," he hissed out, barely managing to keep his hands
safely underneath him. "Then it would have felt even better."
"But we're not kismesis," John said, frowning deeply as he pulled his hand
back. "Why do you want me to hurt you?"
Karkat barked a laugh, a short, sharp sound that made John flinch. "Egbert,
believe me, if we were kismesis I'd be expecting a lot more blood than a couple
of half-assed bites and a little clawing could create. You'd have to hurt me a
fuck of a lot more than that before it actually hurt." He paused, running that
back through his mind, and sighed. "Your stupid language doesn't have the right
words. Pain that feels good and pain that feels bad both come out as 'hurt'."
"If it feels good, it's not pain," John said, looking both puzzled and
frustrated.
"Yeah, and you think hate isn't a kind of love, too," Karkat retorted, rolling
his eyes. The mood had broken enough that he finally felt safe pulling his
hands out, and he raked one through his hair. This was so frustrating. Why
couldn't he ever manage to explain simple, self-evident concepts to John?
Though the fact that the English language didn't even have the right words to
describe what he was attempting to convey didn't help, and probably meant that
it wasn't John's fault that he couldn't seem to grasp it. The failing was
inherent in the human race, not just this particular stupid human.
"So you clawed me because I hurt you and it felt good, so you were trying to
hurt me to make it feel good in return?" John asked, and Karkat nodded. "But I
don't like being hurt!"
"I know, fuck, don't you think I know that?" Karkat gnashed his teeth and
pulled at a handful of his hair. "I can't help it, it's a reflex! And once I
taste your blood it's even harder to hold myself back, because every instinct I
have is telling me that means I'm doing it right."
They sat there and stared at each other for a long moment, and Karkat could
tell that pretty much the same thoughts he was having were also running through
John's head. Karkat couldn't enjoy himself properly until things got a little
rough, but as soon as they did, he couldn't help but be rough with John, who
didn't like it. It was a problem that had no good solution, or at least not one
that Karkat could see.
"This isn't going to work, is it?" John asked miserably. He looked like someone
had just killed his lusus, totally heartbroken. "We've been together since
before the game ended, and we still haven't gotten past kissing and a little
touching. Every time it seems like we're finally getting somewhere, it all
falls apart again and it's worse than before."
"Don't say that," Karkat snapped, his blood running cold. The words alone would
have been enough to chill him, but when combined with that pathetic expression
on the human's face they made him feel like an utter failure of a matesprit.
"Damn it, don't fucking tell me you're giving up that easily, Mr. Sunshine and
Rainbows, Love Will Conquer All. You're going to dump me just because we're
having a little trouble getting to the pail?"
"No! That's not what I mean," John said, shaking his head. He paused, and his
shoulders slumped. "Or maybe it is what I mean. I don't even know anymore,
Karkat. We've been through so much, and I really love you. I think losing you
might kill me. But having you without being able to be with you might kill me
faster. Out of sheer frustration, if nothing else."
"We'll find a way," Karkat insisted. "I don't care what it takes. There has to
be something. We'll find it. I'm not letting go of you." Putting actions to
words, he reached out and grabbed John by the shoulders, hauling his matesprit
closer to him until John was forced to either give in and cuddle him back, or
suffocate from having his nose pressed into Karkat's chest.
John chose to cuddle back, of course, shifting until he was leaning against
Karkat's thorax with his head resting on Karkat's shoulder. His thick hair
tickled Karkat's cartilage nub when he turned his head to nuzzle John.
"We'll figure it out," Karkat repeated. Now if only he could make himself
believe the words.
===============================================================================
"They don't like pain at all, huh?" Sollux frowned as he ran his fingers over
the electrical component in his other hand. Karkat wasn't sure if the frown was
due to the conversation or the piece of computer. Both of them were still
getting used to the bizarre non-organic nature of human computer equipment, and
in some ways Sollux was at a disadvantage because he was so good with Alternian
computers. It was therefore that much harder for him to switch gears, and of
course it didn't help that even after perigees of coaching from Terezi, Sollux
still wasn't nearly as proficient at 'seeing' things by scent as she was.
"Not even a little bit," Karkat grumbled, sorting through a box of cables.
"What's more, their definition of 'pain' is pretty fucking loose. No teeth,
practically no claws, fuck, I can't even hang on too tightly or he yelps."
"Sounds pretty pathetic, and not in the good way." Sollux shrugged and tossed
the component into the box of 'might be useful' bits, and picked up the next
one. Karkat had invited him over to try - once again - to find a way to combine
the Alternian and human equipment into some kind of improved whole. Working
while they talked gave them both an excuse to concentrate on what they were
doing and not have to look at each other, if the discussion strayed into
vulnerable territory. It was probably the closest they would ever come to a
feelings jam, pile or no pile.
Theirs was a very weird sort of moiraillegiance, but it worked for them. Right
now Karkat appreciated it more than ever.
"Pathetic is definitely one word for it," Karkat agreed darkly, hand clenching
a little too tightly on a length of wiring. He forced himself to ease up before
he bent them too far and snapped something inside. "Frustrating as fucking hell
would be another. We're hardly any closer to pailing than the first time we
ever kissed!"
His brain caught up to his mouth a moment later, and he blushed hotly. Yeah,
Sollux was his moirail, but that had been a little blunt even for Karkat.
Thankfully the raunchy statement didn't appear to have bothered the other
troll. "You should probably be thankful he isn't grabbing your horns to subdue
you, given his history," Sollux snorted. He'd probably have been rolling his
eyes, if he'd still had any to roll. "I guess the way you nearly killed him
last time actually sank in. Or are you still letting him do that to you?"
Stunned, Karkat paused with his hand half buried in a box of components,
staring at his moirail. He couldn't even work up the ire to respond to the
familiar taunting. "That's it," he breathed out, eyes wide. "Sollux, you
pitiful fuck, you're brilliant."
"Wait, what?" Sollux tilted his head, and his puzzled look slowly changed to
one of mingled chagrin and horror. "KK, I wasn't serious. Please tell me you're
not actually going to let him do that to you again, after what happened last
time!"
"Fine, I won't let him do that to me again," Karkat lied. His bloodpusher was
pounding so hard he was surprised Sollux couldn't hear it, both with nerves and
anticipation. Why hadn't he thought of that solution? No troll could be
aggressive when somebody was touching the base of their horns, invoking their
submission reflex. Millennia of evolution ensured that. And it was the 'hot
noises' Karkat had apparently made the last time he'd allowed John to touch him
there that had at long last pushed their relationship from twisted human
'friendship' to a proper, pitying matespritship.
Of course, there had been that tiny intermediate step of Karkat very nearly
killing John, plus days of wallowing in shame and mortification before they'd
finally worked it out. That was the source of the nerves, and of Sollux's
disbelief that Karkat would allow John to touch him like that again.
Well, that and the fact that the vast majority of trolls considered horn-
touching to be extremely kinky.
"KK, look, I didn't say anything about how stupid it was when you decided to
make him your matesprit after he betrayed you like that..."
"Yes you did," Karkat reminded him acidly. "At length and in great detail. And
then you declared yourself my moirail whether I liked it or not, 'because
somebody has to make sure you don't do anything else this lethally moronic,' I
believe were your exact words."
"Well, okay, but I didn't actually stop you," Sollux countered. "Mostly because
you'd already done it and convincing you to take it back would only have
alienated the humans more. Right now is when I'm making good on that promise to
save you from future lethal stupidity. Do not make yourself that vulnerable in
front of someone who has already proved that he doesn't understand what it
means and won't respect it. Let him tie you up or something, if you want to get
kinky that badly."
"Oh yeah, that's a great idea," Karkat said, shuddering at the thought. "Let's
kick every aggressive instinct I have into overdrive in an attempt to keep me
from hurting him. Have you ever actually been tied up, Captor? Pretty much the
only thing you can think about is fighting your way free again."
"Do I want to know how you know that?"
"Shut up, everybody knows that. And wipe that fucking smirk off your seedflap
before I tear it off for you. It had nothing to do with John, it happened in
the game!"
"Sure, sure. I believe you. Totally."
Growling, Karkat punched him, and he didn't pull the blow. Much. Why did he
have to have the most annoying grubfucker in all the universes as his moirail?
Thankfully Sollux's smirk faded before the urge to strangle him overwhelmed
Karkat. The other troll sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, and when he
spoke again there was nothing mocking in his tone. "Just... just think about it
really hard before you do it, okay? Really hard. Remember how it felt when he
dumped you helpless and vulnerable in the hallway. Remember how much you really
wanted to kill him, how close you actually came to doing it. What if it goes
wrong again? What if there's still something he doesn't understand, and neither
of you know it but it will ruin everything? What if you lose your matesprit
because of a stupid, dumb decision that you rushed into?"
Oh. Right. That's why Karkat kept him. Because Sollux really did pity him, even
if he had a funny way of showing it sometimes.
"I'll think about it," Karkat promised, subdued. "I will. It's just... at least
it would be better to lose him because we were trying to fix it, than to lose
him because we didn't do anything and it all fell apart."
Unfortunately Sollux didn't seem to have anything helpful to say to that.
===============================================================================
"All right, fuckass," Karkat declared, storming into John's respite block. The
human looked up from his computer and blinked in surprise, but Karkat ploughed
right over anything he might have said. "I've thought it over, and I've come up
with a solution. Brace yourself, because one way or another, we are doing
this."
"Where making this happen?" John replied with an oddly tilted smile.
"What?" Karkat stared at him blankly, his train of thought thoroughly derailed
by the nonsense reply. That wasn't even the right word, was it?
"Never mind," John said, shaking his head with a soft laugh. "What are we
doing?"
"Getting farther than a fucking saliva-swapping session," Karkat growled,
throwing himself down on the bed and pointing imperiously at the spot beside
him. "Sign off with whoever you're talking to and get over here right the fuck
now."
"Um. Okay?" John looked a little startled and baffled. He turned back to his
computer just long enough to type something into his chat window, then shut the
whole system down. He stood to make his way over to the bed, and Karkat took
the opportunity to sneak a quick, admiring look at his matesprit's body. No
complaints there; John had shot up and was filling out quite nicely. Not all
that muscled compared to a troll, but the hints of definition were starting to
be there beneath his increasingly-tight t-shirts.
Impatient as ever, Karkat snagged John by the front of his shirt the moment the
human was in range, and yanked him down onto the bed beside him. John was
laughing as he was pulled down, but Karkat was able to muffle the annoying
sound beneath his lips without much trouble. It was the best way to shut the
idiot up that he'd ever found.
John moaned and kissed him back, tongue sliding between Karkat's lips to steal
all his breath. Karkat clenched his teeth together, both to remind himself not
to bite and to make sure John wouldn't slice his tongue open by accident. That
meant he couldn't bring his own tongue into play, but it was worth it to avoid
ending things early in a spill of blood.
As opposed to ending them a little later in a spill of blood. Shit, why did
humans have to be such delicate fucking snowflakes?
Cautiously Karkat brought his hands up, sliding his fingers along John's back,
careful not to press too hard with his claws. John squirmed under the touch,
but he was making those low mewling sounds that meant Karkat was doing it
right. They were both starting to breathe hard, and Karkat pushed at John until
the human finally got the hint and laid back on the bed.
Propped up on one elbow, Karkat finally opened his teeth enough to let him
brush his tongue against John's. The contact made them both squirm, Karkat
chirping softly as John moaned again. Breaking away from the kiss, Karkat
trailed his mouth down over the column of John's neck, eagerly lapping at the
sweat-salty flavour of his skin.
Now they were back in the same position they'd been in earlier, only with their
shirts still on this time. Karkat's questing tongue found the scabs that had
formed where he'd bitten John, and even dried the taste of the human's blood
was a trigger.
Gasping for air, Karkat wrenched his mouth away and sat back before he could
give in to the temptation to bite. John lay there panting, looking up at him
with confusion and wariness. The former emotion was only to be expected. The
latter cut Karkat to the core, even though it probably should have been
expected, too. Your matesprit wasn't supposed to be wary of you, ever. Damn it,
how had they managed to screw this up so badly?
"Um, I'm not sure what your solution is, but it doesn't seem to be making
anything different so far," John ventured tentatively. "You nearly bit me just
then, didn't you?"
"Yes, because we haven't implemented my solution yet," Karkat told him. He
swallowed hard, suddenly having second thoughts about this. Sollux was right;
what if something went wrong that they hadn't anticipated? He thought John
fully understood the seriousness of the situation now, but what if he didn't?
There were no other options, he reminded himself harshly. "There is exactly one
way to effectively stop a troll from being in any way aggressive," he said, his
voice rough, not quite able to meet John's eyes. "You already know what it is.
Don't make me fucking say it."
"Huh?" John was clearly baffled for a moment, before realization struck and his
eyes lit up with eager anticipation. "You mean, you'll let me touch your horns
again? For real? Oh, but..." he frowned. "You can't move or do anything when I
do that, can you? I mean, it would work to stop you from biting and clawing me,
but that's not all that much fun, either."
"Obviously, grubtard," Karkat retorted. "Which is why you're not going to sit
there and do it for fifteen fucking minutes, this time. Just long enough to get
me thoroughly subdued and make sure the endorphins are in control of my think
pan. I'll stay passive and suggestible for a good long while afterwards,
judging by what happened before. And if it starts to wear off, you can just do
it again."
He was blushing hard by the time he finished that explanation. It was
mortifying to talk about, and even worse to acknowledge that he was actually
discussing something that would be done to him, not just a hypothetical
situation.
"Okay, then... can I...?" John made a tentative movement towards Karkat's horns
with one hand, and Karkat flinched away.
"Just hang on, Egbert," Karkat muttered. He still remembered the way his
cartilage nub had ached for days after the abrupt way it had encountered John's
thigh, the last time they'd done this. He wasn't stupid enough to make the same
mistake twice.
Flopping down into the pillows, Karkat squirmed around until he was lying face
up, hands securely fastened in the sheets just in case. "Okay," he rasped, not
sure if his windtube was closing up from nerves or anticipated pleasure. "Go
ahead."
The few seconds it took John's hand to reach his horn seemed to drag out into
an eternity, and Karkat was nearly hyperventilating by the time contact was
finally made. Then John's fingers slid down the hard nub to find the tender
flesh at the base, and the human squeezed his hand around it.
Subduing hormones and endorphins shot through Karkat's system, loosening his
muscles and clouding his mind. His breathing slowed so abruptly it made him
dizzy, or maybe that was just a side effect of the hand on his horn.
Fuck, he'd forgotten just how good this felt. Bliss swept over him, and Karkat
gave himself to it willingly. The tiny part of him that was nervous about a
repeat of last time's fiasco was completely buried under the spell of lethargic
pleasure.
Then suddenly the hand was gone, and the intensity of the sensation with it.
Karkat managed to make a protesting chirping noise, and sluggishly opened his
eyes to find John leaning over him.
"Karkat?" John said, slowly like he was trying to make sure Karkat could
understand him. Come to think of it, that was rather helpful, considering it
felt like his brain was only working at half speed. "Karkat, are you still with
me? Damn it, did I do it too long?"
Coherent speech was beyond him, but Karkat could warble enticingly as he lifted
one hand to curl around the back of John's neck. His claws scraped sensitive
flesh, but there was no pressure behind the motion, because it felt like there
was no strength left in his body.
"Oh... I guess it worked?" John said, concern transforming into impish delight.
"So, you said you'd be suggestible. That means you'll do anything I tell you
to, right?"
Under ordinary circumstances a question like that - especially accompanied by
that expression - would have had Karkat on full high alert. At the moment he
couldn't even manage to be mildly concerned. He just nodded slightly, and
basked in the warmth of John's answering smile.
"Then kiss me, but no biting," John ordered, and leaned down to seal their
mouths together.
With the constant push of aggression gone, Karkat discovered that kissing was a
much different experience. Their mouths slid together with exquisite slowness,
John occasionally flicking his tongue out to explore this or that sensitive
point in Karkat's mouth. Karkat tried to match the motions, but all he really
managed to do was rub his tongue against John's. The human didn't seem to be
complaining.
Far from it, he was making enthusiastic noises and pressing harder against
Karkat's mouth. For once John was being the aggressive one, and Karkat found
that he liked the change. He tightened his grip around John's neck a little,
not digging his claws in but just applying pressure, encouraging John the best
way he could.
Breaking away at last, John gasped for air. "Okay, yeah, I think this is
working," John said happily. "I could do this for hours. Karkat? You doing
okay?"
"Nnngh," Karkat replied, and felt his lips quirking faintly in a smile.
Smiling? Him? The endorphins were messing with his head more than he'd
realized.
Not that he cared, at least not at the moment. He pulled John down for another
kiss, recovered enough this time to participate a little better. John nipped at
Karkat's lips, which made him shudder every time with pleasure.
Karkat wasn't sure how long they continued like that. At some point his other
hand found its way to John's back, first tracing aimless patterns over the
fabric of the other boy's shirt, and then sliding up underneath when he had
enough coordination back to manage it. John rewarded him by trailing his mouth
down over Karkat's throat and biting him again, this time digging in with his
blunt teeth quite hard right from the start.
A soft, rumbling growl rose in Karkat's windtube, interfering with the chirps
and warbles he'd already been making. The urge to aggress was increasing again,
and he had to struggle not to tighten his hand too much on John's neck. Or
worse, rake his claws down the boy's back.
Perhaps sensing the tension in Karkat's body, John freed one hand and raised it
to tweak the base of Karkat's horn, though he didn't lift his mouth from
Karkat's neck. If anything he bit down harder, teeth finally sinking through
the tough skin and making a bright star of pain burst behind Karkat's closed
eyes.
He went limp again, despite the way the bite was making him want to writhe. It
also meant he stopped playing over John's back, but his hand stayed where it
was.
Finally John eased up on the bite, and Karkat responded with a quivering warble
of protest. To his delight John wasn't stopping, only changing locations to nip
repeatedly up the length of Karkat's jaw. "You like that hmm?" John murmured,
his voice husky. "Fuck, Karkat, you really do make the most amazing noises."
He shifted until he was kneeling above Karkat, one knee between Karkat's legs
and pressed up against his shame globes in the most amazing way. Karkat keened
and rocked against him, fighting to move his hips against the subduing
influence of the endorphins. He couldn't manage much more than tiny, spastic
movements, and John didn't even seem to notice what he was doing.
"I wonder if you'll make different sounds if I bite you in different places?"
John mused aloud, and Karkat could hear that wicked smirk in his voice. He
brought his mouth to the top arch of Karkat's ear, nibbling at the curve all
the way from the spot where it joined his head to where it ended in a point.
Karkat's warbles turned into something closer to mewls as John bit down harder
at the end.
It felt unbelievably good, the sharp sting of teeth combined with the soft heat
of John's breath flowing over the responsive surface of his ear. Karkat would
have squirmed if he could have. His bulge was out, he realized, the sensitive
organ sending sparks skittering through his nervous system as it writhed,
simultaneously restrained and stimulated by the tough material of his pants.
Thankfully John's knee was connecting just low enough not to put pressure
against his bulge, because that would have been the kind of pain that hurt in a
bad way.
As coordination slowly returned, Karkat resumed tracing patterns over the
fragile skin of John's back. He slid his other hand higher into the human's
hair, tugging gently at the short locks and scraping over his scalp. The
contact made John produce some pretty hot noises of his own, stoking the fire
building inside Karkat ever higher.
There was one major flaw in his brilliant plan to keep himself from hurting
John and to take things farther, Karkat realized dizzily. Since he couldn't
talk or even really move, he had no way to warn John that things were going a
little too far. At least, too far for the fact that they were both still fully
dressed and hadn't in any way discussed having actual sex.
Not to mention there wasn't a pail in sight.
He tightened his hand on John's neck, trying to get the human's attention and
also pull him back a little. The move backfired as John apparently took it as a
sign that Karkat was getting aggressive again, and he rubbed against Karkat's
horn instead of breaking off to let Karkat talk.
Going completely limp for the third time, Karkat shuddered as pleasure swept
over him in unending waves. This was bad, he knew it was bad, knew he needed to
find a way to put a stop to it before things got even more out of hand. But he
couldn't bring himself to care enough to protest through the rush of
endorphins.
Then John shifted position, drawing away from Karkat's ear so he could stretch
up further. Karkat's breath stopped in his windtube entirely as he realized
John was going for his horns.
The hot, wet sensation of John's mouth connected with the nerve-packed flesh at
the base of one of his horns, and Karkat forgot everything else. It was a
million, a billion times better than having John's hands there, so good that
Karkat honestly thought he might die of pleasure overload. Karkat cried out,
softly but repeatedly, the helpless chirps escaping him in a ragged stream.
Now he was really in danger of embarrassing himself. He couldn't even squirm
away from the pressure on his shame globes, or try to shift position to ease
the stimulation of his bulge. He was keening faintly, the only sound he could
hope to make, but it only seemed to be encouraging John.
The faint scrape of dull teeth against the base of his horn was such a jolt
Karkat thought he could feel actual lightning running through his body. Shit,
John was taking his begging for biting and bloodletting a little too seriously.
If he bit down there, Karkat was one hundred percent certain he wouldn't be
able to stop himself from breaking.
Don't bite, please don't bite, oh fuck don't bite, the tiny remaining rational
part of his mind babbled, while the entire rest of his body and soul screamed
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!
Apparently John was listening to the louder part of Karkat's psyche, if he was
listening at all. He sank his teeth into the sensitive flesh, not breaking the
skin but hard enough to make the most amazing burst of pleasure flare in
Karkat's think pan. His whole body jerked with the force of it, despite the way
his muscles were still forcibly held limp. The spike of pleasure rushed down
his spine, and when it hit his groin everything went white and hot.
Karkat lost track of reality completely, utterly consumed by the most intense
pleasure he could ever remember feeling. When he finally came back to himself,
the mouth at his horn was gone. Groggily he forced his eyes open, and found
John kneeling above him at a short distance, looking down at him with an
expression of astonishment and desire. The blush that spread over his cheeks
was as deeply red as the genetic material that was now turning Karkat's pants
into a soggy mess.
"Karkat?" John asked, probably when he saw Karkat's eyes open. Somehow Karkat
managed the faintest of nods to indicate that he was listening. "Did... did you
just... wow, holy shit, you totally did, didn't you." Astonishment edged into
envy. "Um. I, uh, didn't mean to go that far... I mean, I didn't think we were
going to, you didn't tell me you could, you know, get off just from that."
'Just from that', he said, like it wasn't the most intense sensation Karkat had
ever experienced. Mentally Karkat made a note to chew the idiot out later, just
on principle. Right now it was all he could do to remember to breathe.
But that hint of envy was bothering him, and he knew it wouldn't be right to
leave things like this. Though he was still thoroughly under the spell of the
subduing endorphins, Karkat found he was able to move his hand as long as he
concentrated hard and didn't try to go too fast. He slid it down John's back,
then down over the human's hip until he could cup John's groin, feeling the
hard length of his not-bulge through the heavy material of his pants.
John gave a startled moan and ground down against him. Obviously pressure
wasn't a problem, judging by the way he was frantically rubbing the length of
his bulge against Karkat's palm. Karkat closed his fingers tentatively around
the curve, and was rewarded with another heartfelt noise of desire from John.
In moments the human's movements had grown erratic, and soon after John cried
out sharply and went still, panting over him. Karkat thought he felt the barest
trace of moisture seeping through the cloth and the top of the hard shape, but
it was nothing compared to what he'd expected. Fuck, no wonder humans didn't
need pails.
John was trembling, his arms actually shaking where he had his hands braced on
either side of Karkat's shoulders to prop himself up. Karkat caught him by the
hip and tugged him down, bracing himself for the inevitable moment when John
collapsed on top of him. All the air fled him with a whoosh, but it was worth
it for the soft, warm feel of John's body sprawled over his.
"Mmmnnnmm... thhhnnnh..." Coughing, Karkat cleared his throat and tried again.
"Think that was a success," he said, the words slow and careful but
comprehensible.
It took him a moment to identify the sound John was making into his shoulder as
a laugh. "Yeah, I think that was good," John agreed breathlessly, lifting his
head to smile at Karkat. "I'll probably get better at reading you over time, so
I know when to touch your horns and you can participate more." He was still
blushing brightly, but he sported a dazed, sated expression that Karkat
immediately decided he wanted to see more of. At every possible opportunity.
"Next time, pail," Karkat said succinctly, trying to ignore the force of his
own blush. "Also some way for me to tell you to back off, shit."
"You complaining?" John asked, raising an eyebrow at him, laughter dancing in
his eyes. "Because it sure didn't sound like it at the time."
"Fuck no," Karkat hastily assured him. "Not complaining. Not at all. Just...
don't want it to end so fast, next time," he finished in a mumble.
"Mmm. Yeah, okay," John agreed happily, snuggling back against his shoulder
again. "Sounds good. And also yeah, pail, wow. Oh, uh, I suppose you probably
want to get cleaned up," he said, pushing himself up.
Karkat pushed him right back down again. "Later," he declared, shifting his
hand so he could rub gently at John's back again. "Right now I don't care about
anything. Except how good you feel."
"Awww, Karkat, that was really sweet," John exclaimed. "So does that mean I
can..." he gestured awkwardly at Karkat's horns. "You know, even when we're
not...?"
"If you aren't mature enough to talk about it, you're sure as fuck not mature
enough to do it," Karkat told him, blithely ignoring his own earlier inability
to bring himself to directly order John to touch his horns.
"Oh, all right, fine," John huffed in mock indignation. "Can I touch your horns
even when we're not having s-sex?"
Only a minor stammer at the end, Karkat supposed that deserved a reward. He
wrapped his arms more firmly around John's waist, and smiled into the human's
hair where John wouldn't be able to see it. "Maybe once in a while. You don't
want me building up a tolerance or something, do you?"
"Yeah, I think that's about as likely as building up a tolerance to getting
off, judging by the way you were reacting," John replied, laughing. He slipped
one hand up to rub gently at Karkat's horn again.
Karkat didn't quite manage to get out a curse before he went limp once more. He
hadn't intended that to be an immediate invitation, just an indication that
John could do it again at some theoretical point in the future. Not that he
minded, at least not while the bulgelicker was actually doing it.
And fuck, maybe by the time John got tired of playing with his horns, he'd be
ready to go again. Karkat would certainly be so thoroughly subdued by that
point that John wouldn't have to do a damn thing to keep him from getting
aggressive for quite a while.
In the meantime Karkat let himself be swept away on a tide of bliss, as much
from the feel of John against him as the touch on his horns.
He didn't even miss the taste of blood enough to register that he didn't miss
it. He'd found something far better.
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