Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/7448893. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Captain_America_-_All_Media_Types, Marvel_Cinematic_Universe Relationship: James_"Bucky"_Barnes/Steve_Rogers Character: James_"Bucky"_Barnes, Steve_Rogers, Nick_Fury, Alexander_Pierce, Sam Wilson_(Marvel), Natasha_Romanov, Clint_Barton, Brock_Rumlow, Jack Rollins, Wade_Wilson, Scott_Lang, Sharon_Carter_(Marvel) Additional Tags: Alternate_Universe_-_Rock_Band, Alcohol_Abuse/Alcoholism, Drug_Use, Canon-Typical_Violence, Angst Series: Part 2 of Ride_The_Lightning Stats: Published: 2016-07-10 Words: 1804 ****** Pretty Hate Machine ****** by GoodGollyMissYollie_(Yollie183) Summary Steve Rogers works for a discreet private security company and gets assigned to James Barnes, a musician who takes the idea of 'sex, drugs and rock 'n roll' just a little too seriously. ***THIS IS A COMPANION WORK TO Goddamn_Electric *** Notes Hi! So, I asked the wonderful people who are reading my fic Goddamn Electric if they wanted scenes from Bucky's POV, and this is that! Please go read that if you haven't yet (but this should make sense without the context of the other fic, so it's entirely your choice.) Title from the album of the same name by Nine Inch Nails. The lyrics at the beginning of the chapter were supposed to reflect Steve's thoughts and feeling (because in the main fic, that's from Steve's POV, I use song lyrics to give a glimpse into Bucky's mind. I like symmetry, okay), but I couldn't find something that fit exactly, sorry! I'll do better next time, promise! See the end of the work for more notes I'm gonna make you bend and break Say a prayer but let the good times roll In case God doesn't show And I want these words to make things right But it's the wrongs that make the words come to life "Who does he think he is?" If that's the worst you got Better put your fingers back to the keys One night and one more time Thanks for the memories Even though they weren't so great "He tastes like you only sweeter, " One night, yeah, and one more time Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories "See, he tastes like you only sweeter." They say I only think in the form of crunching numbers In hotel rooms collecting page six lovers Get me out of my mind and get you out of those clothes I'm a line away from getting you into the mood  -  Thnks Fr Th Mmrs, Fall Out Boy ~   “Jamie, please try to behave.” Bucky shrugged out from under Alexander Pierce’s hand that was gripping his shoulder. Bucky hated the nickname, but he stayed quiet. At least Pierce didn’t call him ‘Jimmy’, which was infinitely worse. “I always behave,” Bucky said, a little sulkily, which earned him an indulgent smile from Pierce. “Yes. Badly,” Pierce said and Bucky laughed because it was expected of him. “Are we done here?” Bucky asked, but he was already shoving his arms into the sleeves of his leather jacket, not waiting for an answer before letting himself out of Pierce’s hotel room. He needed a fix. And a drink. Wade was waiting for him in the lobby, wearing a long-sleeved white t-shirt that covered most of his scars, but did little to hide his impressive physique. Bucky grinned at him. “You gonna buy me a drink, hot stuff?” “Only if we go Dutch.” Bucky laughed at the stupid joke as they stepped out onto the crowded Rotterdam sidewalk. The sun was just starting to set, bathing the world in a reddish hue. Bucky and Wade made their way to a club that Sharon had suggested, and Bucky easily lost himself in the trance that was pumping through the speakers, and warm bodies and lines and shots, and later in the company of a pair of lovers who loved Siberia too. He dubbed them Hansel and Gretel, their real names lost in the jumble of things he didn’t want to remember about tonight, and took them back to the hotel with a pocket full of white powder. In the penthouse, he lay back on the bed after putting on The Downward Spiral, and watched them undress each other. With the contrast in their skin tones, they looked like night and day and Bucky enjoyed the view. They moved toward him and he traded lazy kisses with them while they divested him of his shoes, jacket and shirt, then he pushed Hansel down onto his back and dusted his dark skin with white powder. He cut a few lines and let Gretel do a couple first. She fell back onto the bed in a cloud of copper hair, tickling his back with her long fingernails as he leaned forward to do a line of his own. He sat back, wiped his nose and scanned the exits by instinct. To his mild surprise, a tall blonde man was standing in the doorway. Had the man followed them here from the club? Bucky was sure he would have noticed. It should probably have bothered him more, but he was just high enough that the only thing wrong with the scene was the fact that the man was fully dressed. Bucky smirked. “Well, hey there, good looking. Come to join the party?” The man turned scarlet. “I… uhm. No.” “No?” Bucky queried. Maybe he wasn’t as high as he thought after all. He did another line. “No,” the man said, his tone a little firmer. “Mr Barnes, my name is Steve Rogers, I work for Shield. I’ve been assigned to act as private security for you.” Bucky frowned, his mind shifting back into screechy coherency. “Private security? I didn’t hire a bodyguard.” “I did.” Bucky’s gaze flew to Alexander Pierce, who had appeared in the doorway behind the bodyguard. Pierce was frowning, and Bucky’s stomach clenched in apprehension. “No way, Pierce. I’m not having a fucking boy scout running after me all day.” “Yes, you are.” Bucky withered. Of course he wouldn’t be given an opinion, a choice. He should be used to it by now. He looked back to Rogers, who had a tiny crease between his eyebrows. His eyes were blue. Sharp and intelligent. His bearing said military. He was also unfairly handsome, his shoulders broader than Atlas’. Bucky followed Rogers and Pierce into the living area while hotel security escorted Hansel and Gretel out of the building. He didn’t spare them a second glance. Pierce introduced himself to Rogers and they shook hands, then he said, in that way he had sometimes that said he was unhappy with Bucky; “And you’ve met James, albeit a little unconventionally.” Bucky couldn’t help but snort at that. Yes, Pierce was definitely disapproving of his behaviour. He needed a drink. Ignoring Pierce’s gaze, he got himself a bottle of vodka. It tasted like snow and blood and Bucky dug the nails of his free hand into his palm to keep his thoughts in the here and now. Pierce and the babysitter talked while Bucky quietly got his mind back under control, only Pierce’s parting words filtering through the haze. “He is our greatest asset.” The temperature seemed to drop twenty degrees. Hydra Records’ Greatest Asset. God, sometimes Bucky hated this. “Look man, I’m sorry. I thought you knew about me.” The bodyguard’s voice snapped Bucky’s maelstrom of thought back into the present. They were alone in the penthouse, no cameras, no stage, no Alexander Pierce. “Yeah, whatever,” Bucky said, not sure how he was supposed to deal with this person. “Just stay out of my way, okay, Fido?” The man’s jaw clenched, his eyes narrowed. “Maybe you should try being a bit less rude.” Bucky laughed despite himself. Maybe this could be fun. “You were the one who interrupted my threesome, and I’m rude?” Rogers’ Adam’s apple bobbed as Bucky advanced on him, backing him toward the couch. He stepped close enough to see each freckle that dotted the man’s nose and cheeks. “So,” Bucky continued, raising an eyebrow, “how are you going to make that up to me?” Bucky was almost impressed when the man rebuffed him, dodging him with a sneered, “Nice try.” Bucky pouted for effect before taking another swallow of vodka. The bodyguard excused himself to go unpack, and Bucky put the bottle down. He wandered aimlessly to his room and turned off the music. Instead of going to sleep, like he knew he was supposed to, he ambled into the hallway, where he heard Rogers’ voice drifting from the open doorway of his room. Rogers said the name Sam in an affronted voice. He must be on the phone, as there was a beat of silence while Sam replied, then Rogers said with distaste; “I don’t want his cock anywhere near me!” Bucky propped his shoulder against the jamb of Rogers’ bedroom door. “Whose cock?” Rogers jumped, dropping his phone, and blushed a brilliant Gryffindor scarlet. “Justin Bieber’s,” the man blurted as he picked up his phone and waved at it. “Do you mind?” “Not at all,” Bucky said brattily. He moved to sit on Rogers’ bed where a pair of blue pyjama bottoms were laid out – who under the age of eighty even wore pyjamas anymore? – as Rogers ended his call to whoever Sam was. “Was that your girlfriend?” Bucky asked, because he figured conversation might be the easiest way to assess any threat this man might pose. “No.” Stubborn. “Boyfriend?” “Nope.” Homophobe? Hetero? Pig-headed? All of the above? Bucky huffed in frustration. “Who even wears pyjamas anymore?” Rogers’ lips thinned. “Why are you in my room?” Bucky rolled his eyes. “I’m bored,” he said, then added, “Y’know, you ain’t acting very professionally toward me.” “I apologise, Mr Barnes.” The bodyguard’s sarcasm got an amused snort from Bucky. At least the guy was showing symptoms of a sense of humor. Bucky leaned back on the bed, reverting slightly to more familiar attitude of ‘you’re so pretty, let them see your body’, but Rogers’ eyes went straight to the bandage on Bucky’s abdomen. “What happened?” (“Why do you have a knife in here?” “Because it’s edgy. Now put it away.” “Nuh-uh, faggot.” “Brock, put down the knife before you hurt yourself.” “I’m not like you, y’know. I’m not a fag.”) Bucky looked at the white bandage, tamping down hard on the memory. “I got into a fight.” It wasn’t a lie, really, but it tasted bitter on Bucky’s tongue. “Guy pulled a knife outta nowhere. Which is probably the reason for you being here.” The bodyguard nodded, his gaze now wandering across Bucky’s body, but he had a crease between his eyebrows, as if he didn’t like the view. The guy had to be straight, Bucky figured, not because of his own ego, but because of the detached quality in Rogers’ blue eyes as they traced the Tool quote tattooed below his bellybutton. “What,” he demanded, “do you have some self-righteous opposition to tattoos?” “No,” the bodyguard met his gaze again. “I have a couple myself.” Bucky’s interest was piqued. He gave Rogers a once-over. “Show me.” Rogers scoffed, shaking his head. “Oh, come on!” Bucky gave a pout. “You’ve seen mine!” Now Rogers rolled his eyes. “Everyone with an internet connection has seen yours.” Which wasn’t far from true. “Do you Google me often, Rogers?” “Only when I’m paid to.” And you’d know all about that, wouldn’t ya, Jimmy. Bucky forced the air out of his lungs, compelling the voice back into the darkest recesses of his mind. “You’re no fun,” he told Rogers. “I’m not supposed to be fun,” the bodyguard said, a little impatiently. Bucky was suddenly reminded of Pierce’s admonishments. Behave yourself, Jamie. Don’t act so irresponsibly, Jamie. “Did Pierce tell you to do this?” “Do what?” “Be standoffish,” Bucky tried not to flinch, “disapproving.” “No,” the bodyguard’s eyes widened innocently, “why would he do that?” But Bucky couldn’t answer that, didn’t know how to. He stalked out of the room and back to his own, Rogers’ voice reverberating in his ears. Why did anyone do anything?Maybe if Bucky knew the answer to that, he wouldn’t be such a ruin of barely-a-person.   Bucky slept fitfully, his dreams filled with hands and snow and bloodstains, knives and skin and dirty twenty dollar bills. He woke just before dawn with the lingering whisper of ‘On your knees, Jimmy’ creeping up his spine.   End Notes If Bucky seemed a little... passive... about having a threesome... well, let's say there's a good reason. The next Bucky POV outtake will be posted as a separate work in this series, so please subscribe to get notified of updates! Thank you to the wonderful humans (and internet cats) who read, commented and kudo'd Goddamn_Electric ! I love you all!!! Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!