Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/10759857.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Underage
  Category:
      F/M, Multi
  Fandom:
      The_Walking_Dead_(TV), The_Walking_Dead_&_Related_Fandoms
  Relationship:
      Negan_(Walking_Dead)/Original_Female_Character(s), Negan_(Walking_Dead)/
      You, Negan_(Walking_Dead)/Original_Character(s), Simon_(Walking_Dead:
      Saviors)/You, Simon_(Walking_Dead:_Saviors)/Original_Character(s), Negan_
      (Walking_Dead)/Simon_(Walking_Dead:_Saviors)/Original_Female_Character
      (s), Negan_&_Simon_(Walking_Dead:_Saviors)
  Character:
      Negan_(Walking_Dead), Negan's_Wife_Lucille_(Walking_Dead:_Here's_Negan),
      Simon_(Walking_Dead:_Saviors), Original_Female_Character(s)
  Additional Tags:
      Pre-Apocalypse, Workplace_Relationship, Sexual_Tension, Unresolved_Sexual
      Tension, Unresolved_Romantic_Tension, Alternate_Universe_-_Bar/Pub, Walk
      Into_A_Bar, Teacher-Student_Relationship, Flashbacks, Alternate_Universe
      -_High_School, Angst, Fluff_and_Angst, Heavy_Angst, Angst_and_Feels, Teen
      Romance, Smut, Eventual_Smut, Fluff_and_Smut, Angst_and_Fluff_and_Smut,
      Slow_Burn, Slow_Build, Reader-Insert, Affairs, Extramarital_Affairs,
      Secret_Relationship
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-04-29 Updated: 2018-03-18 Chapters: 7/? Words: 19795
****** Old Habits Die Hard ******
by Emielyn_xo
Summary
     After leaving your home town, a wreck of a relationship forces you to
     return and with it, an old skeleton finds his way back to you and
     back into the life you thought you had left behind.
Notes
See the end of the work for notes
***** Chapter 1 *****
It felt so strange to be back in Atlanta. Back home, where you belonged. You’d
swore once you were out you were never going to come back, yet here you were,
facing the old skeletons that you’d buried long ago. The apartment was cold, it
didn’t feel like home. Unpacked boxes were scattered everywhere. Odd piles of
clothes that you’d half unpacked, the odd box open and the contents strewn
across the floor. The only signs that someone was actually living here were the
cold cup of coffee on the table and the messy sheets of your bed. You’d never
felt so alone, standing there in that apartment. But then you thought…you had.
You’d spent four years of your life in New York, alone, with no friends or
family. You thought you had your life made with Ben. The name still left a sour
taste in your mouth, but then of course it would. He was such a big part of
your life for so long and the torment he’d inflicted on you was still so raw.
You thought he was the perfect gentleman when you first met him, all those
years ago. Maybe you were just desperate, looking for a quick way out of this
town, but he was your ticket. He came in and swept you off your feet. He was
first man since…well, someone else who was just another bad memory. You
remember the day you left, clear as day, your mum begging and pleading with you
not to go, the huge pan of guilt you felt as you boarded that flight. Your life
was just full of regrets and boarding that flight was one of the biggest ones
of your life. The first month in that new city was fine. Ben worked a lot so
you were on your own a lot of the time. You went out and explored, got yourself
a job in a little bar. It all seemed fine, but then his true colours started
showing. He became possessive. Obsessed even. He refused to let you out of his
sight, refused to even let you work, but then, that just gave him more control
over you. Pretty soon, you didn’t have a laptop anymore or a phone. The days
since you’d spoken to your family turned into weeks, and then months. And then
the accusations started. You were cheating on him. You were seeing other
people, talking to other guys. He completely tore you down, bit by bit, without
you even realising. You finally snapped to your senses though when he really
lost control. The moment he laid hands on you that was it. The next day you
called your mum, booked your flight and within 24 hours you were back in
Atlanta. He tried to chase you down but your family did a good job of keeping
him away, they were always so good at protecting you.
You sighed as you grabbed your coat, slipping it on before grabbing your phone
and locking your apartment behind you. Six months you’d been back in Atlanta
and you still hadn’t managed to sort yourself out. You’d only just got an
apartment but you were still jobless. You needed a job, and fast if you wanted
to keep this apartment. You were twenty-four, you couldn’t keep relying on your
parents for everything. But for now, you just needed to relax for the
afternoon. The cold stung your cheeks as you made your way out of your
apartment building and down the street. It brought back so many memories,
walking through town when you were in high school with your friends. Memories
took over your mind as you walked along the bustling streets, heading towards
the bar at the end of the road. Hanging around outside when you were younger,
trying to impress the older boys at your school. An absent smile spread across
your face, remembering a time that seemed a lifetime ago. You pushed the door
to the bar open and the smell of old wood and alcohol immediately hit your
nose, giving you an odd sense of comfort. You took a deep breath as you walked
in, inhaling the old familiar smell. It was much darker in here than it was
outside, but you welcomed the warmth, feeling the blood pulsating in your
cheeks as they warmed up. You looked around the bar before noticing a familiar
face waving at you. You smiled as you made your way over to the booth, greeting
your friend as you slid onto the bench. It had been so long since you'd been
out with a friend and you immediately felt at ease being back in familiar
company.
"Hey stranger, I've been wondering when I was gonna see you again!" Becki was
one of your oldest friends, you'd grown up together, you were practically
joined at the hip when you were younger. "Still a whiskey and coke right?" She
pushed the glass of dark liquid towards you and you accepted it willingly. It
was as if you two had never been separated. You smiled, taking a sip and
letting the taste liger in your mouth before swallowing.
"God I've missed you Becki."
It felt like you'd only been in that bar a few minutes when, in reality, it had
been hours. The conversation had flowed, so had the drinks. Becki got you up to
speed on everything that had happened whilst you were away, giving you the
latest gossip. It felt so good to finally be at ease. You smiled to yourself as
you made your way to the bar with your two empty glasses. You leant forward
onto the bar, shaking your hips to the music. You see a guy behind the bar
approaching you. Your eyes wandering over to him, following him as he makes his
way towards you. He was tall, slim, a black t-shirt hung loosely over his body.
His hair was pushed back, a moustache lined his lips. His white teeth gleamed
through his smile. You couldn’t stop yourself from smiling back at him. He was
older than you, but that had never bothered you in the past. You held up the
two glasses at him, running your tongue along the back of your teeth.
“Same again?” He takes the glasses from you, winking as he does. You give a
small laugh and nod your head, dropping your eyes to the bar. He walks away for
a few moments and then comes back with your drinks, placing them on the bar in
front of you. “So, I know Becki over there,” he leans on the bar, shortening
the distance between you two, pointing a finger over at Becki, “she’s a
regular, but a pretty face like yours, I would know if I’d seen you around here
before.” You smile, rolling your eyes at him.
“I just got back in town. How much do you I owe you?” You reach for your purse
but his places his hand on your wrist, stopping you. Your eyes meet his and you
can feel your cheeks burning red.
"It’s on the house. What’s your name?”
“I’m not telling you my name. Stranger danger and all that.” You wink grabbing
the drinks. “Thanks…for the freebies.”
You laugh to yourself as you walk back to the table, handing Becki her drink.
“What’s up with you?” She smiles at you as you slide back into your seat. You
nod in the direction of the bartender.
“That guy, he just gave me these…on the house.” She laughs.
“Oh Simon. He can’t resist a pretty girl, especially not one like you.” She
slaps her hand on top of your and you laugh with her.
“As if. He seems to know you pretty well. Being a regular and that!” She shook
her head, a big smile still plastered across her face.
“A regular? Of course I was a regular, I used to work here!” She suddenly sits
forward, leaning into you, “Hey you’re still looking for a job right?” You know
exactly what she’s about to say.
“No, no! I can’t work here, I mean…”
“You need a job right? It decent pay, the hours can be a bit rubbish but hey,
the tips make up for it. I’m sure Simon would hiring you in a second! Go ask
him!”
“No, I can’t. I’ll…I’m sure I’ll find a job soon.” She slaps her hand down on
the table.
“Yeah right! In this poxy town? Is this not the same town we both struggled to
get out of? Hey, if you’re sticking around you’re gonna need money. Just go and
ask him.”
“Fine! I will…later. Let’s just enjoy the night, please?” She smiled, slouching
back into the chair with her drink. You grab yours and relax back too, planning
to enjoy the rest of the night.
“Come on gals, we’re closing.” Simon approached the table, grabbing the empty
glasses that were in front of you.
“Oh Si…come on, can’t we have one more cheeky one?” Becki winked at him. You
could easily tell she’d had too many.
“Come on Becki, let’s go.” You start to slide your jacket on as she stands up.
“Alright, alright, just give me minute okay?” You roll your eyes as she makes
her way to the bathroom.
“You had a good night?” Simon smiles at you. You instantly smile back. There’s
just something about his smile.
“Yeah, it’s been really good thanks.” An awkward silence falls between you. You
decide to finally break the silence. “I don’t suppose you need any bar staff do
you?”
“And who’s asking?” You look sheepishly at the table, fiddling with your hands.
He lets out a small laugh. “For you? I’m sure I could find something for you to
do…if you tell me your name.”
“Y/N…it’s Y/N.”
“Well Y/N…” He holds his hand out for you and you take it, sliding out of the
booth to stand, “I’ll see you at 8 tomorrow, for a trial. Got to make it look
legit to the others.” He winked at you and a huge grin spread across your face.
“Thanks Simon.”
“Don’t mention it.” He turns and walks away as you both hear Becki stumbling
back from the bathroom. You help Becki to get her coat on and you both walk out
into the cold night air. The blast of coldness against your warm cheeks is
refreshing, pulling you back to sobriety. You wave Becki off as she jumps in a
taxi, zipping your coat up and starting to walk down the street.
When you finally get back to your apartment, it doesn’t feel so bad. The night
spent in good company had done wonders for you. You felt better about
everything. As you climbed in bed you phone buzzed. You looked to see a text
from Becki.
Got home safe, see you soon x x x
A sense of relief settled over you. You always hated leaving her when she was
in a state but she always refused you taking her home. She lived on the
opposite side of the town, but you didn’t mind. You would rather see her home
safe but she was an independent girl. She knew how to look after herself. As
you closed your eyes, you finally felt like things were gonna get better again.
You finally had a job. It might not be the perfect job, but it was a job, and
that meant money in your pocket. You felt the excitement brewing in your
stomach, looking forward to your first shift tomorrow. For the first time in
months, you went straight to sleep, at peace and happy.
***** Chapter 2 *****
Chapter Summary
     Reader starts her first shift at the bar, and begins a blossoming
     friendship with her new boss
Your hands were shaking as you pushed open the door of the bar. It was 7:30pm,
earlier than what Simon had told you, but you wanted to make a good impression.
The familiar smell of alcohol and leather filled your senses but it made your
nerves go even crazier. You’d worked in bars before, but since things had ended
with Ben, your confidence was shot. You scanned the bar for Simon but he wasn’t
there, or at least, you couldn’t see him. You took a deep breath before making
your way over to the man stood behind the bar. He was around your age, his
blonde hair was spiked, his white t-shirt clung to the muscles underneath it.
As you edged nearer, you realised how much you were shaking. You tried taking
some deep breaths, trying to calm yourself down. You smiled at the guy as you
stepped up to the bar. He came straight over to you, flashing you a smile.
“Hey beautiful, what can I get you?” You immediately felt your cheeks burn, a
small laugh escaping your lips.
“I…I’m here to see Simon. Is he around?” He laughs, motioning for you to follow
him.
“You must be Y/N. Simon said he had a new girl starting today, never said you
were so pretty though.” He turns and winks at you, coming around from the bar
to greet you properly. He holds his hand out for you.
“I’m Jack.” You take it smiling.
“Nice to meet you Jack.”
“Come on, I’ll take you to Simon.”
You follow him towards the bar of the bar. He walks until he comes to the door
at the end of the hallway. He knocks on and you stand there with him, waiting.
As the door opens, your eyes immediately meet Simon’s and you suddenly feel
less nervous.
“Y/N! You’re early. Come in,” He presses against the door, allowing you to slip
into the office, “Thanks Jack, we’ll be out in a bit.” You turn and smile at
Jack. He smiles at both of you.
“No problem. I’ll get back to it.” He nods at Simon and walks off. Simon shuts
the door, motioning for you to take a seat. You take a seat at the desk,
placing your bag on the floor and slipping your jacket off. Simon’s eyes rake
over your body. Your black vest top revealing just enough skin. His eyes
wandered over your arms, across your collarbone, watching your chest rise and
fall with each breath. You shifted in your seat, not even realising that it
caused Simon to jump back to reality. He starts searching in his desk for
something.
“Sorry Y/N, I wasn’t expecting you yet, I’m all over the place.” He smiles at
you and you can’t help but smile back at him.
“I’m sorry, I just…I wanted to make a good impression.” He laughs, pulling some
paper from the desk and placing it on the table.
“I told you, the jobs yours. You don’t need to impress me. This is all just
formalities. Hey, I’ll even pay you for tonight.” He winks at you and you feel
all the blood rush to your cheeks.
“You don’t have to do that Simon.”
“No, I want to. I told you the jobs yours and seeing as you’re working a shift
tonight, I’ll be paying you for it. Here, I just need you to fill these in and
it’s a done deal.” He slides the paper across the table to you and hands you a
pen. Silence falls between you as you start filling in the paperwork. It isn’t
an awkward silence though. You barely notice it until he starts to speak again.
“So where you from?” You answer without lifting your head from the paper.
“Here. I mean, I’ve been away for a few years. I’ve been back….about six months
I think.”
“So that’s why I don’t know your face. What made you come back?” The question
stops you dead in your tracks. You’d tried to avoid talking about it as much as
possible.
“A bad relationship.” As much as you tried to push Ben out of your mind, he was
always there, lingering in the background.
“I’m sorry,” he leans forward and squeezes your hand. The small gesture sends
butterflies rippling through your stomach, “whoever he was, he was an idiot to
let someone as beautiful as you go.” He winks at you and you laugh, rolling
your eyes.
“Yeah…like I haven’t heard that before.” You give a small laugh and he suddenly
stands up.
“Come on, let’s do some actual work. We can finish this off later. You can
leave your things in here, I’m the only one with a key.” He opens the door for
you both to exit. You squeeze past him, your faces becoming inches apart. You
immediately feel your breath quicken, feel the blood rushing round your body.
You were never this nervous around men, there was just something about Simon.
                                      --
As soon as you’d hit the bar the night went pretty quick. You and Jack worked
great together, and as well as that, he was actually decent company. You hadn’t
laughed so much in months. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad thing, being back home
where you belonged. Simon had been out for part of the night, helping behind
the bar. He seemed to know every single person that came in, you couldn’t help
but finding yourself watching him. Each time he passed you on the bar that
night, his hand would drift across the bottom of your back, his whispers in
your ear, making sure you were ok. Even though you were working, you hadn’t
enjoyed yourself so much in a long time. You felt free at last, actually able
to enjoy yourself. Simon had gone back to his office after most the customers
had left. That just left you and Jack to clean up. He was a nice guy, he kept
you talking as you both made your way around the bar. You discovered he was
only a few years older than you, but he’d worked here with Simon since he was
old enough too. He didn’t live too far from your apartment either. At least you
would have a friend close by. He shut the music off and the bar fell quiet and
you sat down, taking a minute to relax.
“Here.” He brings over an open beer and places it down on the table in front of
you.
“Thanks.” You smile at him before taking a sip. The cold beer was surprisingly
refreshing. You relaxed back in the chair, enjoying the silence that fell
between you.
“You need a ride home? I don’t mind dropping you off.”
“Oh..no it’s ok. I still need to finish off some paperwork with Simon. I’ll
just get a cab home.” He looks disappointed with your words but nods to you.
“Alright. How about you give me your number…just in case you ever need a lift.”
You smile and agree, taking his phone and typing your number in. He smiles,
giving you a hug and then shouting to Simon that he was leaving. As the door
closed behind Jack, you picked up your beer and walked to the back to Simon’s
office. The door was slightly open and stood there for a minute, watching him.
He was counting money on his desk, bent over, you could see the concentration
on his face. You’re not sure how long you stood there before he noticed you.
“Y/N, what you doing standing there, come in,” He leant back on his chair,
watching you enter the room, “I thought you’d gone with Jack.” You take a seat
again across from him.
“No, I umm…” you didn’t know why you’d stayed, there was just something about
Simon that was drawing you in, “I need to finish off that paperwork.”
“Don’t be silly, we can do that tomorrow. You got a lift home?”
“I was just gonna get a cab…and I didn’t wanna waste my beer.” You smile
holding the beer up. He laughs, staring straight back at you.
“Well how about this? You finish your beer, let me finish cashing up and I’ll
drop you off home.” You smile and nod. You weren’t usually one to let strangers
drop you off home, but Simon seemed like such a nice guy, and as much as you
hated to admit it, you’d always been attracted to older guys. As you sat there
watching you could feel your eyelids growing heavier. You rested your head back
against the chair, closing your eyes for what felt like a couple of second. You
bolted up when you felt Simon nudge your leg.
“Come one sleepy head, let’s get you home.” He holds his hand out for you. You
take it, losing your footing as you stand up and falling into his chest. Your
hands rest against it, feeling how firm it is beneath your hands. Your faces
are inches apart as you look up at him, you can feel his breath against your
lips.
“I…I’m sorry.” You feel his hand glide up your back, pulling your body closer
into his. He pushes a piece of your hair behind your ear, his hand softly
grazing your cheek. You want to say something but the words can’t escape your
lips. Your mind refused to let you think straight. His hand didn’t leave the
side of your face, his thumb lining your jaw. You absently bit your lip as you
stared at each other. That seemed to snap him back to reality.
“No, I’m sorry,” He lets his hands drop away from you, leaning down instead to
pick up your back and jacket, “Come on, let’s get out of here.”
                                      --
The car ride back to yours was quiet. Hardly a word was passed between you and
Simon apart from you telling him where you lived. You didn’t really know this
man, apart from that he owned a bar, but that didn’t stop you wanting him. Your
eyes kept making their way over to him, looking at him as he was driving. You
could tell you weren’t the only one who was tired. He would occasionally rub
his temples, trying to keep himself awake. As he pulled up outside your
apartment building, you sighed. As tired as you were, you didn’t want to be
alone again. You’d enjoyed being surrounded by people. Going back into that
apartment felt like you were stepping back into your own head, with only the
bad memories to keep you company. As you opened the door, Simon reached across,
grabbing your hand.
“Y/N, I’ll see you tomorrow, right?” You smile at him, relaxing back into the
seat.
“Yeah…if you want me.”
“I do want you…” He leant over to you, and you found yourself leaning into his
words, “At the bar…I mean…the jobs yours so…”
“Yeah…I want it…the job.” It was taking everything in yourself not to lean
further and kiss Simon. Everything in your body was telling you to kiss him.
The tension in the air was pushing you towards each other, but your brain was
forcing you not to. You’d only just met this man, only just managed to get a
job, in his bar. Before you knew what was happening, his hand was resting on
your cheek, his thumb drawing its way across your bottom lip. He didn’t take
his eyes off you, not even for a second. You can feel the electricity coursing
through your veins.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.” He drops his hand from you, leaving you free to leave
the car. You immediately wanted his hands back on you. You forced yourself to
step out of the car, waving to Simon as you did. Each step you took to your
apartment, you fought the urge to turn around and ask Simon to come in. You
just put the feeling down to being alone for so long and tried to ignore it.
When you got into the apartment, you went straight to the window. Simon was
still parked outside. You waited by the window until he drove off, and then you
really were on your own again. You went about getting yourself ready for bed.
As you climbed in, you found yourself thinking back to the last time you were
in this town. To the man who had sucked you in back then. You thought of where
he was now. The last time you saw him, he had been leaving this town too. But
you hoped for his sake that he would never have to come back like you had. Your
phone vibrated on the stand. You rolled over grabbing it to see a new message.
__Jack:Hope you didn’t stay too late
__You: No wasn’t too late. I’m back home now<
__Jack: Good. You got anyone keeping you company?
__You: Haha, none of your business. Goodnight Jack
__Jack: Worth a try haha, see you tomorrow.
You laughed to yourself. Jack was ok as a friend, but you couldn’t see anything
more happening between you. He just wasn’t your type. You laughed to yourself
as you thought of what Becki had said when you told her you were leaving with
Ben. He’s too young for you. I thought you liked older men. She had a point.
You just couldn’t stand the guys around your age. You liked someone
more….experienced. Just as you started to drift off your phone vibrated again.
This time the message got you excited.
__Simon: Thanks for tonight. I’ll see you tomorrow right?
__You: Definitely, if you’re sure you want me back
__Simon: I want nothing more than to see you again
__You: Is that so?
__Simon: Hell yes. Wish you’d invited me in but didn’t wanna push my luck with
such a beautiful girl
__You: I’ll remember that for next time ;)
__Simon: So there’s gonna be a next time?

__You: Maybe, we’ll see
__Simon: God you’re a tease. Goodnight beautiful xx
__You: Goodnight boss ;) x

The conversation got you all worked up again, thinking of Simon. You laid back,
a huge smile spread across your face. It was just some harmless flirting with
your new boss. Neither of you could deny the tension that was there, and you
found yourself hoping that something would come of it. You closed your eyes,
sleep taking over quicker than you thought, with Simon filling those lonely
dreams.
***** Chapter 3 *****
Chapter Summary
     The relationship between the reader and Simon takes a drastic step
     forward, but the return of an old memory threatens to ruin it before
     it's even started.
Several weeks had passed since you started working at the bar. For the first
time in years, you felt a sense of normality wash over your life. A sense of
freedom. Although the apartment still felt empty and cold, you were slowly
making it your own, slowly unpacking the boxes. You looked forward to work
every night, the chance at getting to see Jack…and Simon. As much as you argued
against him, every night Simon would insist on driving you back to your
apartment, making sure you got in safely every night. You looked forward to the
drive back each night. The more time you’d spent with Simon, the more you’d
come to like him. However, today was your day off, and for once, you weren’t
going to spend it at the bar. As you walked through the town, you took in
everything around you. The cold wind rustling the leaves, the people rushing
past you, going about their days, the stream of cars that drove up and down the
street. As you walked along, enjoying the day, you heard a horn sound. You
turned puzzled, until you saw Simon’s car slowing as it came towards you. You
couldn’t stop the smile that spread across your face. You’d seen him less than
8 hours ago when he dropped you off home, yet here he was again.
“Hey trouble, what you up to?” Simon’s smiling face peered out from inside the
car. You instant felt a wave of content wash over you.
“You can talk,” You smile at him, “I’m just going to visit my mum. Haven’t seen
her in a while.” He pushes the car door open for you.
“What you waiting for? Get in, I’ll drop you off.” You knew it was useless
trying to turn Simon down. He never took no for an answer so you smiled,
shaking your head, and climbed into his car.
 
The car ride was nice. As usual, the conversation between you two flowed. You
told him where your mum lived and he knew exactly where he was going. Driving
down all the different streets, past your old school, it all brought back
memories, some good…some bad…but you were just happy to be in the car with
Simon. As you pulled onto the street, the familiar feeling of excitement spread
through you. As Simon neared your mum’s house, it wasn’t there that your eyes
fell, but to the empty house across the street. That house held so many
memories, some amazing memories…and some not so great. And now it was nothing
more than an empty shell, nothing like you remember…
 
It was the last week of the summer holidays before school was due to start
again. You sat on the porch, watching as your brother loaded up his car,
getting ready to leave for college. The sun was beating down on you as you
lazily teased him, watching him pack each box into the small car. The street
was quiet, but the sounds of kids playing echoed from the back gardens. Your
eyes wandered around the surrounding houses, sprinklers going, the soft rustle
of the leaves in the breeze. The slight breeze was refreshing in the warm heat.
As you and your brother threw idle insults at each other, you noticed a car
slowly driving down the road. You stood up on the porch, shielding your eyes
from the sun, watching. Your brother stopped what he was doing and joined you
on the porch, trying to get a better look. You watched as the car slowed down,
before turning into the driveway of the house across the street. The house had
been empty for a few months, even though the sold sign had been there for just
as long. You figured they must have moved from a different state. Why else
would the house be empty for so long. The driver's door swung open and you
couldn't stop you mouth from falling open. Your eyes scanned over the figure
that climbed out. He was tall, you guess at least 6 foot, if not taller. His
black hair was slicked back, large sunglasses covered his eyes. You noticed he
had a rough beard covering the lower half of his face, you could just make out
the odd flecks of grey in it. You were so focused on him you didn't notice a
woman exit the other side of the car. You didn't realize you were staring until
your brother's shouts bought you back to reality.
"Mom! We got new neighbors!"
You nudged him hard, hoping that the new neighbors hadn't heard his shouts.
Luckily, they didn't and you watched as they began to unload boxes from the
back of the car. Your mom came running out and joined you on the porch, eyeing
up the strangers. You didn't know what it was about him but you couldn't take
your eyes off him. He's was older. A lot older. At least twice your age but
something about him was drawing you in.
“Come on Y/N, let’s go say hi.”
Your mom nudged you, walking back into the kitchen to grab something. Your
brother laughed and went back to packing the car. You rolled your eyes. Your
mom always did this with the new neighbors, she just had to make herself known.
Not that it was a bad thing. You were pretty friendly with everyone on the
street thanks to your mom. She came strolling back out of the house with a
bottle of wine. You chuckled to yourself as you followed your mom across the
street. As you got nearer to the house, the man had vanished from sight, but
you could make out the woman unloading bits from the car.
“Hi there! We’re from across the street. Just thought we’d pop over and
introduce ourselves, I’m Gabby and this is my daughter Y/N,” You rolled your
eyes. You could recite your mom’s little intro, it was the same every time. She
gave you a sharp nudge forward and you smiled at the woman. She was pretty,
around the same age as your mom. Her long black hair was tied back, the odd few
strands fell in front of her face. She held out a hand to your mum and then to
you.
“I’m Lucille. Let me just get my husband.”
She walked away into the house and emerged a few seconds later followed by the
man you had seen. You were right about him being tall. He towered over all of
you, his dark brown eyes boring into you. He smiled at you and you could almost
feel yourself getting lost in it. His voice was deep, gravelly. You couldn’t
ignore the fire that ripped through you at the sound of it.
“I’m Negan.”
 
As Simon pulled up outside your mom’s, you thanked him, leaning over instantly
and planting a small kiss on his cheek. You felt the heat rise in your cheeks
as you realized what you had just done.
“Oh my god…I’m sorry Simon…it was just…” He laughed, shaking his head.
“Don’t worry about it. I didn’t mind.” He smiled at you and you instantly
smiled back. You hadn’t felt so comfortable around a man in so long. Simon was
just what you needed right now.
“Bye Simon.” You exited the car with a huge smile on your face. You turned and
waved to him as he drove off.
                                      --
Later that night, you finally managed to set your tv up. You sat on the sofa,
idly flicking between channels when your phone buzzed. The excitement rose in
you when you saw Simon’s name on the screen.
__Simon: Did you have a good time with your mom?
__You: Yeah thanks. Did you have a good afternoon?
__Simon: Well about as good as sorting stock can be. You at home?
__You: Yeah, where else would I be lol
__Simon: Look out the window
You frowned at your phone, wondering what the hell he was on about. You climbed
off the sofa, wandering over to the window. You laughed to yourself as you
opened the curtain, your eyes falling straight on Simon leaning on his car on
the street below.
__You:What you waiting for then? Come up, the doors open
You walked away from the window, throwing your phone on the chair as you went
to unlock the door for him. You walked over to the fridge and looked at how
empty it was. You grabbed two beers out, deciding that if Simon as hungry,
you’d order something, but you didn’t need to worry about that. He knocked
before he walked in and your nose was immediately met with the smell of chinese
food. He put the take away on your counter and took the beer off of you.
“What are you doing Simon? You didn’t have to buy food.”
“Well, I thought if I was stopping by I might as well bring something to eat.”
You grabbed some plates and motioned for him to sit down on the sofa.
“Well, you do know how to keep a girl happy.” You both laughed and you sat down
next to him. “So what’s up?”
“Why’s anything got to be wrong? I was just passing and thought you might want
some company.”
“So you just happened to have chinese food in your car?”
“Well...I might have picked that up special.”
You both spent the night laughing and eating. You didn’t know what it was about
Simon but he just made you feel so relaxed, so at ease, something you hadn’t
felt for a long time. Simon was a lot older than you, but you couldn’t deny
that there was definitely an attraction there. As the night drew on you, you
began to loosen up even more around him. Simon had relaxed back on the sofa and
so had you, resting your legs across his lap. His fingers traced up and down
your exposed legs.
“Y/N I’m really glad you came back to town.” You looked at him, a quizzical
look spread across your face.
“Why’s that?”
“Cuz if you didn’t, I wouldn’t have met you and I wouldn’t be sat here now
enjoying myself.” You blush straight away and looked down at your beer.
“I’m glad I came back too.”
The words were like a magnet and you felt yourself being instantly drawn
towards him, and he moved towards you too. You put your beer down on the floor
and reached your hands up to his face. Your first thought was that he would
pull away but he didn’t. He was instantly drawn into you, straight to your
lips. You couldn’t help the small moan that escaped your lips as they connected
with Simon’s. It had been so long since you’d had proper physical contact that
the whole thing felt incredible. His hand immediately went to the back of your
head, pulling you deeper into the kiss. You couldn’t help but pull him down to
lay on the sofa, his whole body pressed against you. You couldn’t tear yourself
away from him, your touch tracing his lips every time he pulled away. His hand
traced the outline of your body, first over your top, and his fingers slipped
underneath, brushing against your clammy skin. Your body was on fire with each
touch, with each kiss. His hand pushed your top up further and further until he
was able to slip it off over your head. You knew what was going to happen, and
every inch of your body was hoping for it. Your hands made their way down to
his belt, fumbling with it trying to get it undone. His lips left yours, slowly
making their way along your jawline and down your neck. He grasped a handful of
your hair, gently pulling your head backwards, exposing more of your neck to
him. Just as you managed to get him belt undone you heard a ringing. You both
tried to ignore it but it wouldn’t stop. Simon’s phone.
“Oh fuck sake,” he groaned before tearing himself away from you and looking at
the phone. You noticed his face drop when he saw the name on the screen, but
you didn’t catch who it was. He immediately jumped off you as he answered the
phone. Whoever was on the other end was getting him riled up. You watched him
pace back and forth, rubbing his temples as he spoke. You suddenly felt
exposed, laying there on the sofa without your top on. You sat up and grabbed
your discarded top from the floor. Simon stopped talking and you looked over to
him. A look of worry had settled over his face. He looked over at you, a sad
look in his eyes. He came towards you and kissed you on the cheek.
“I’m really sorry Y/N, I need to go. Something’s come up.” Before you could
even speak he was at the door.
“Simon wait…” He was gone before he even heard your words. You could feel the
anger bubbling up inside of you. You stormed over to the window and watched him
climb in his car and speed off. Who was it that he was speaking to? Jack?...His
wife? You pushed the thoughts from your mind. He’d walked out on you
mid…whatever the hell that was…without an explanation. You grabbed another beer
from the fridge and plonked yourself back down on the sofa. No less than 10
minutes after Simon had walked out on you, your phone began to ring. It was
your mom. You looked at the time, 11.35pm. What was she doing ringing you at
this time? She never rang you this late at night.
“Mom, what wrong?” Without even a pause, the words spilled from the phone.
“He’s back Y/N, he’s come back.” Your mouth fell open, your phone dropping from
your hand. You knew exactly who she was talking about.
Negan.
***** Chapter 4 *****
Chapter Summary
     After the surprises of the night before, a stroke of good luck seems
     to come the reader's way, but in what shape?
Chapter Notes
     I am so so so sorry this has taken so long to get this chapter out!
     I've had serious writer's block, mixed with stresses of the real
     world but I finally feel like I've overcome that now! Whoever is
     still reading this thank you so much for still sticking with me! <3
You hadn’t slept at all that night. The words had been ringing in your ears all
night. He’s back. The whole night had been one huge mistake, from Simon to your
mom’s words. Embarrassment was clouding over you as your thoughts drifted to
the previous night. How could I do that? How could I have kissed Simon? You
laid in bed, replaying the night over and over again. Simon was your boss. You
knew you’d crossed the line, and then him rushing out on you like that. None of
it made sense. He was just as into it as you were. Or at least you thought he
was. There was no denying that there had been some serious sexual tension
between the both of you and last night it had just come to a head. It had been
so long since you’d felt that comfortable with a man. Everything with Simon had
just seemed to happen naturally, as much as you’d been trying to resist it. But
now…you weren’t sure how things were going to be between you. He’d left so
quickly you didn’t even get a chance to say bye. And who was on the phone? Who
would make him rush off so quickly like that, especially with what was
happening between you two? A kid?....A wife? The thought sent shockwaves
through your body. You weren’t doing that again. You’d been the other woman
before and the whole thing…well…from your mom’s phone call it sounded like it
was coming back to haunt you. Negan. That name still sent chills down your
body. You were completely and utterly in love with him, completely consumed by
him. You didn’t even realise it at first.
 
It was a week after you’d first met Lucille and Negan. You had seen them on the
odd occasions when you’d been going out or coming home, but you’d never shared
more than a smile. Your mom, on the other hand, had been talking with Lucille
every day. By how friendly they were you would have thought they’d been friends
for years, not days. You were back to school in a few days. Your last year. You
were finally turning 18. It felt like this year was going to be the best one
yet. That morning you woke up with a huge smile on your face. You climbed out
of bed, feeling the warm sun beating down through your window. You grabbed a
towel and went to the bathroom, turning the shower on before stripping off. As
you held your hand out to test the water, you realised it was cold. The flow
slowed until there was nothing left but a few drops of water. You rolled your
eyes, grabbing the towel and wrapping it around you.
“Mom!...Mom!” You stomped down the stairs, annoyance radiating from you. “Mom!
What’s wrong with the water?!”
You stopped dead in your tracks when you saw the figure of a man laying under
the sink, a bag of tools next to him. You gripped the towel close to your
chest.
“Excuse me?”
Your words made the man jump and he got up from under the sink. The moment you
realised who it was you immediately regretted being stood there in just a
towel. Negan. His dark brown eyes burned a hole into you. You immediately felt
small and vulnerable, with nothing to protect you but a towel. Those feelings
melted away though when a smile spread across his face.
“Y/N right? Sorry, your mom let me in, she’ll be back soon. Said your sinks
been playing up so I came to fix it. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
He took a step towards you and at the same time you took a step back.
“No it’s fine. She never said you were coming over…I…I should go get dressed.”
You turned to leave but his voice stopped you. It sent ripples through your
body.
“Don’t get dressed on my account. You still want that shower?” You turned and
your gaze fell straight to his. His eyes didn’t leave yours for a single
second. In that moment, you couldn’t even speak. You felt his whole gaze
consuming you. “Y/N?” You snapped back to reality.
“Oh…umm…it’s not working. I mean, the water stopped.” He let out a small laugh
that sent vibrations through you.
 “Go on, I’ll turn it back on for you. I can hang around for a while till
you’re done.” You nodded and turned, leaving him behind to go and get your
shower. You felt nervous knowing you were in the house alone with him.
You showered quickly, not wanting to keep Negan waiting. You slipped on shorts
and a top and hurried back downstairs. Negan was sat at the kitchen table, idly
turning the wrench in his hand. You stood in the doorway, watching him for a
moment. Your eyes couldn’t help but wander over the muscles in his arms, over
his chiselled jaw. You didn’t realise his eyes were locked onto you as you
stared at him. You felt embarrassed when you noticed he was watching you. He
stood up from the table and walked towards you. You could feel your heart
beating in your chest, heat spreading through you as he got closer. He was so
close now that you could feel his breath warming your cheek.
“I…I’ve…finished.” Your voice was shaking. A smirk spread across his face.
 “I can see that. You’re still wet.” He winked at you and you could feel your
knees going weak. Your mouth fell open slightly as you tried to think of
something to say, but the words escaped you. You turned on your heels and ran
back upstairs to your room. What was that? Was he coming onto you? You shook
the thoughts from your head, realising how ridiculous they were. He had a wife,
not to mention he was old enough to be your dad. You pushed it all out of your
mind and avoided leaving your room until your mom was back. But still…you
couldn’t help but catch yourself thinking about him when you weren’t
concentrating.
                                      --
Your heart raced as you walked into the bar that night. You hadn’t heard
anything from Simon, which was probably for the best. You told yourself not to
text him, you knew you were bound to say something you’d regret. Plus, the way
he’d rushed out on you last night, you weren’t sure you even wanted to speak to
him. You just hoped that tonight would be busy, that way you could avoid Simon
all night. Luck wasn’t on your side as you pushed the door to the bar open.
There were a few regulars seated around the bar, but it wasn’t busy in the
slightest. Jack was lent against the bar, talking to a regular. You smiled to
him as you walked over.
“Just gonna put my bag in the office and I’ll be out.”
“Sure thing, take your time, we’re not busy.” He winked at you as you walked
towards the office.
The office door was closed which was unusual for Simon. You knocked on, not
wanting to just walk in, but there was no answer. You knocked again and
listened. There was no movement inside. You pushed the door open and was met
with darkness. Simon wasn’t here. You frowned, scanning the room. Everything
was untouched. He hadn’t been here at all today. You chucked your bag onto the
chair and made your way back out to Jack.
“Where’s Simon?”
“Don’t know. He rang me earlier asking to open up for him. Said he had some
business to take care of.” You furrowed your brows at him. Why hadn’t he rung
you? You’d not even had a text. You couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy
overcome you. Who was so important that he couldn’t even text you? I’m so
stupid. He saw me coming. You couldn’t help but feel used. You tried to push
the thoughts from your mind and focus on the night but you couldn’t. Simon was
the first guy you’d gotten close to since Ben and now you felt as bad as what
you did with him. You tried to focus on the night, hoping to finish as quickly
as possible and be back home away from any reminder of Simon.
                                      --
“You get going Y/N. There’s not much left to do.”
“You sure? I don’t mind staying.”
“No get going. I’ll be fine.” You nodded and threw the cloth back onto the bar.
As you approached the office, ready to grab your bag, you noticed the light was
on. Jack hadn’t left the bar all night and you were sure you’d turned the light
off when you came out. As you neared the door, you could see your bag was
untouched, still laying on the chair where you’d thrown it. You pushed the door
but before you took a step in you saw a figure leaning on the desk, head in his
hands. Simon. You heart began racing. You didn’t know what to say to him. You
didn’t even want to be near him. Things just felt so awkward after last night.
You took a deep breath and stepped into the office, deciding not to say
anything to him. If he couldn’t even send you a text, you weren’t going to
waste your breath on him. You grabbed your bag off the chair and saw movement
out of the corner of your eye, but still, he didn’t speak to you. You clenched
your jaw, resisting the urge to let him know just how angry you were. As you
turned to leave he finally stopped you.
“Y/N…wait…” You turned your head to look at him. He looked as though he hadn’t
slept at all that night, like the world was on his shoulders. “I’m really sorry
about last night. Something just came up.” Was that all he had to say?
“It’s fine.” You took a deep breath and began to walk out when you felt Simon’s
grip around your wrist.
“Y/N please, let me explain.” You could see the hurt in his eyes. In your mind,
you were telling yourself no, but just looking at him, being this close to him,
it was making you want him again. You had to control yourself.
“I need to get home.”
“Let me drive you then. Please Y/N, just let me explain. I don’t want to hurt
you.”
“Kinda hard when you just bailed on me. Not even a text Simon.” He loosens the
grip on your wrist, turning to sit back down.
“I know, I am sorry. It’s just….it was a blast from the past that’s all. Threw
me off.” He sighs, resting his head back in his hand. He looks worn out. You
place your bag on the floor and walk over to him, leaning on the table in front
of him.
“Who was it?” He reaches a hand out and rests it on your hip. The feel of his
touch sends ripples through your body.
“Just an old friend.”
“A girlfriend?” You can’t stop yourself. Simon looks up to you, shakes his head
and then pulls you onto his lap. You push your hands against his chest, trying
to make some distance between you, but the feel of his chest beneath his shirt
only made you melt further into his arms.
“It’s nothing like that. An old friend got back into town last night, he was in
some trouble. If it was anyone else I wouldn’t have gone. Come on Y/N, let me
make it up to you.” He grabs your hand, pressing his lips to it, the soft
gesture making you like putty. His words didn’t even properly register in your
mind.
“Simon…don’t mess me around.” He places his hand on your cheek and pulls you
towards him, softly pressing his lips to yours. Instinctively, you wrap your
arms around his neck, pulling him in closer. Every time you were near Simon it
was like a magnetic force pulling you together and you couldn’t fight it. His
hand caressed your cheek as the other wrapped around your back, sliding
underneath your top to trace along your skin. You feel fire burning through
your body, your need for him consuming you. You pull him deeper into a kiss
when he stands up and places you on the table. He leans over and slams the
office door shut, then positions himself between your legs as he kisses down
your neck. You let out a small moan as he kisses the sweet spot on your neck.
“Are you sure about this Y/N?” Your breathy moans should have been enough
confirmation for him but they weren’t. “Y/N?”
“Yes…Yes Simon…Yes.”
His hands went to work, undoing your jeans. He pulled them down and you kicked
off your shoes. You undid his belt and pulled his trousers and boxers down,
allowing his erection to spring free. You couldn’t help but gasp as your hand
wrapped around it, feeling how big he was. He smiled against your lips,
obviously pleased at your reaction. He pushed towards you, using one hand to
keep you up and the other to bring your hips forward to him. He pressed himself
to your entrance, wetness pooling there. You took a deep breath as he pushed
himself into you, spreading your walls around him. You let out another loud
moan and Simon pressed his lips to yours, trying to muffle the sounds.
“Shh…you gotta be quiet.”
You bit your lip and nodded as he began to thrust into you. You wrapped your
arms around his neck as the thrusts quickened. You were trying hard to supress
the moans that were wanting to escape your mouth. Simon nuzzled his face into
your neck, occasionally nipping at the soft skin. You pressed your mouth
against his shoulder, trying to muffle your moans which you could no longer
hold in. With each thrust he went deeper and harder. You couldn’t contain
yourself anymore and you threw your head back, letting out a loud moan. A hand
came up over your mouth, willing you to be quiet. You could feel yourself on
the edge.
“Si…Simon….I…I’m gonna…” Simon’s grip on your waist tightened, as did your legs
around his. You felt your walls contracting around him, massaging him into his
own release. You felt tingles shoot through your legs to your toes, your whole
body vibrating against him. He loosened his grip on you and you laid back on
the table, tired and breathless. Simon pulls his trousers up, standing there
for a moment, admiring you with a smile across his face. He holds a hand out to
you, which you take and he pulls you back up to sitting, pressing himself
against you again in a long, slow kiss. You absorbed every second of it, not
wanting this night with Simon to end.
“Let me take you home.”
You nodded, pushing him away and standing up to put your jeans back on. You
hadn’t felt like this for a long time, you didn’t want Simon to leave you for a
second.
When you were finally ready to go, he walked out of the bar with you, making
excuses to Jack that he had only quickly nipped in, that he still had things to
do and that Jack could shut down. You caught the look on Jack’s face when he
saw you walking out of the bar with Simon. You couldn’t tell if it was sadness,
disappointment or jealousy, but it was something bad. But you didn’t care. In
that moment, you had everything you wanted.
                                      --
Simon pulled up to your apartment, letting the engine click over.
“I really enjoyed that. I’m sorry I ran out the other night.” You smile and
lean over, pressing your lips to his.
“I forgive you. Do you want to come in?” He looked at the time then back at you
and you knew the answer before he even said it.
“I really wish I could. I’ve got some things to sort out but how about I take
you for breakfast in the morning?” You couldn’t stop the disappointment from
showing on your face, but you’d settle for breakfast. You nod.
“Breakfast it is.”
You smile at him before leaving the car and heading up to your apartment. As
usual, he didn’t leave until he saw you look out the window and give him the ok
to go. You were saddened that, yet again, you were home alone, but the night
hadn’t been a complete bust. Just thinking about what had took place in Simon’s
office, not even an hour ago, sent ripples through your whole body. You decided
to shower and then climbed in bed, leaving your phone in the kitchen. You fell
straight to sleep, content with your relationship with Simon. He was a good
guy, you knew it and for once you felt truly safe with him. As you slept, you
didn’t hear your phone go off. One…two…three messages. But none were from
Simon…
***** Chapter 5 *****
Chapter Summary
     The mysterious phone calls of Simon's become to much for the reader,
     but her own past is slowly coming back to haunt her.
Chapter Notes
     I am so sorry I've been rubbish at updating lately! Thank you to all
     who are still reading <3 I really do appreciate all of you!
You were awoken by a loud banging on your apartment door. You rubbed your eyes
as you climbed out of bed, reaching for your phone to see what time it was, but
you realised you’d left it in the kitchen last night. You grabbed a discarded
t-shirt and threw it on as you made your way to the door. A smile spread across
your face when you saw Simon standing there, one hand in his pocket and the
other holding his phone.
“Finally. What you been doing? I’ve been ringing you all morning.” You thought
he was annoyed but the smile on his face told you otherwise. You stood to the
side, letting him enter your apartment.
“I’m sorry I left my phone in the kitchen last night. I don’t even know what
time it is.”
You laughed shutting the door. Simon shook his head at you, leaning on the back
of the sofa and holding out his hand. You smiled and grabbed it, almost losing
your footing as he pulled you towards his chest. He wrapped his arms around you
and began planting kisses along your neck. You pushed your hands against his
chest as you squirmed under his touch.
“Well…” He pulled back, admiring your sleepy look, “It’s half past nine and I
do believe I promised you breakfast.” You couldn’t help but groan at the time.
That was why you felt so tired.
“Simon! Half past nine! I’m not even fully functioning until at least 10!” He
laughed pushing your hair out of your face.
“Come on lazy,” He playfully smacks your bum, making you jump slightly, “Go and
get ready and then I’m taking you for breakfast…just like I promised.”
“Fine. Do you want a drink or anything while I get ready?” You turn to walk
into the kitchen but he grabs your waist pulling you back.
“I’ll sort myself out. Now, go and get dressed before we end up not going for
breakfast.” He presses his lips to yours, your body instantly melted against
him. You playfully graze his lip with your teeth and he lets out a subtle moan
before pulling away. “Y/N…” You can’t help but let out a small giggle.
“I’m going, I’m going,” you walk towards the bathroom, flashing him a quick
smile as you see his eyes glued to you, “Make yourself at home.” You give him a
cheeky wink before walking into the bathroom laughing.
You made sure to leave the bathroom door slightly open. As you stripped off you
caught sight of Simon taking a seat on the sofa, fiddling around with his
phone. You weren’t sure what you wanted him to do but with the door let open,
at least you knew the invitation was there. You gave him one last look before
climbing into the warm water and pulling the curtain across.
As you were showering, Simon sat down on the sofa, trying to make himself look
busy by idly flicking through his emails. His eyes wandered up to see the
bathroom door slightly ajar. His eyes widened as he saw you discard what little
clothes you had on. He felt the urge rising in him to come and join you. The
invitation was there. He knew under any other circumstances that door would
have been shut, but you were more than just work colleagues now, the previous
day had shown that very clearly. But he didn’t want to rush things. He sat
there, tapping his phone against his hand as he watched you climb in the shower
and pull the curtain across. His heart was beating fast and he could feel the
blood rushing around him body. Everything in his body was telling him to follow
you into the shower, but he couldn’t. He’d had many one night stands before,
many women that he couldn’t even remember the names of, but he felt different
with you. He’d spent many nights pulling women in bars to never see them again,
but with you, there as something already there. This spark that he’d never felt
before. As he sat there lost in his own thoughts, his phone began to ring. He
looked at the name and the familiar sense of uneasiness washed over him. He
jumped from the chair, answering the phone.
You wrapped the towel around yourself, your hair still dripping wet. As you
exited the bathroom you looked around Simon, but he was nowhere to be seen. You
frown, wondering where he had gone. You were slightly annoyed that he hadn’t
took your open invitation to the shower, but now he’d vanished. You clutched at
your towel and stopped over to the kitchen, looking for your phone. Just as you
found it, Simon came back into the apartment.
“Simon! Where did you go?” You folded your arms, frowning at him.
“I’m really sorry Y/N. I had a call…” His eyes wander over you, your skin still
damp and glistening in the morning light, “Wow…Y/N…you look even more beautiful
than usual.” You smile and roll your eyes.
“I’m gonna get dressed. I’ll be 5 minutes. Try not to do a runner on me again.”
You walk over and kiss his cheek, leaving him in the living room whilst you go
and get dressed. You’d never noticed how many calls Simon got, but you shrugged
it off. He’d assured you it wasn’t another woman and you wanted to believe him.
After all, he hadn’t done anything to make you doubt him and he did own a busy
bar. It was probably just work. You dismissed the thoughts from your mind and
finished off getting ready.
                                      --
Simon had taken you to a little restaurant in town. It was busy, but you had
the perfect table, in a quiet corner, by the window. Simon had ordered you
breakfast, pancakes and strawberries, your favourite.
“Simon…this…it’s perfect. You didn’t have to go to this much trouble.”
“Don’t be silly. I told you I was gonna take you for breakfast and that’s what
I’ve done, so just enjoy it.” He smiles as you take a bite of your pancakes.
“You know I would have been happy with just a Starbucks.” He laughs, shaking
his head.
“Well, I can get you a Starbucks as well if you want,” you laugh, shaking your
head, “There is another reason I bought you here though.” You stop eating at
look at him puzzled, your heart suddenly thumping in your chest.
“What is it?”
“I wanted to thank you. You know you’ve been such a help at the bar…and to me.
You’ve been great.” You couldn’t help but smile at his words.
“Oh Simon, don’t be silly. I should be thanking you. You gave me a job, got me
back out there again,” you feel a slight heaviness weigh down on you, “If it
wasn’t for you, I’d still be spending my days stuck in my apartment. You’re one
of the few friends I have in this town.”
A comfortable silence falls between you both as you eat.
Simon’s phone rings and his expression changes when he sees who it is. He
quickly excuses himself before answering. You watch him, puzzled. Whoever it
was was certainly getting Simon worked up. As you watched him pace back and
forth with his phone to his ear, you realised you’d not checked your own phone
since last night, not that you were expecting there to be a huge uproar waiting
for you. As your screen lit up, you felt your heart miss a beat. The number was
unknown but you knew exactly who it was.
                      Unknown Hi doll face. How’s things?

     Unknown I’m back in town. Wanted to catch up with my favourite girl.

                    Unknown Giving me the silent treatment?
Negan. You’d been trying to ignore the fact that he was back in town. He was
the reason you’d left in the first place. How did he even get your number?
You’d changed it at least twice since you last saw him. The feelings came
rushing back as you tried to force the thoughts of him to the back of your
mind. But once Negan was in, there was no way of getting him out.
You noticed Simon walking back to the table and quickly shoved the phone back
into your pocket, along with the thoughts of Negan. His face had changed. It
was now tinged with…annoyance? You took a sip of your coffee, watching him sit
down. You knew straight away what was coming.
“Y/N…I’m really sorry…”
“You have to go?” You tried to stop the annoyance coming through in your voice
but if Simon couldn’t hear it in your voice, he could definitely see it in your
face. He placed his hand on top of yours and you couldn’t stop yourself from
pulling back slightly.
“I am sorry.” You push yourself way from the table and stand up, throwing your
jacket on.
“Don’t worry about it Simon. I’ll see you tonight.”
You storm away from the table, tears welling in your eyes. You can hear Simon
shouting your name but you refuse to look back, refuse to be sucked into this
game he was playing with you. You had spent years being a booty call for
someone who wasn’t interested and you promised yourself that wasn’t going to
happen again. You were sick and tired of being peoples dirty little secret.
                                      --
You’d only been back at school a few days but it had felt like forever. Now
here you were, last period on a Friday. Gym. You could think of other things
you’d rather be doing. Literally anything. The school had been buzzing with
whispers of the new gym teacher. You hadn’t seen him yet but you doubted he’d
be as good looking as the whispers said. You pulled on your top and slammed
your locker shut. The sun was beating down on the track as you made your way to
the rest of the girls. You could see a man standing in front of them, his white
t-shirt gleaming in the sun. As you neared, you got the odd feeling that you
knew him. His stance. His black slicked back hair. It was Negan. What was he
doing here? You held your hand up to your face, shielding your eyes from the
sun. It was definitely Negan. You heart raced as you walked towards the group.
His eyes fell straight to yours as he carried on talking to the group. You
stood there, shifting under his gaze, until the girls dissipated around the
field.
“Y/N, you’re late.” You shifted uncomfortably.
“I’m sorry Negan, I…” He silences you straight away.
“Don’t call me Negan. I’m your teacher, not your friend. This is a warning.
You’re late again it’ll be detention. Do I make myself clear?” You frown at
him. This seemed like a completely different Negan to the one you had met in
the holidays.
“Crystal.”
“Good, now go warm up.”
You could feel his eyes burning into you as you walked away. It was going to be
a long afternoon.
The lesson had been a shock to the system, that’s for sure. Negan had been on
your back the whole time. Not matter what you did he was there, criticising
you, pushing you. Your whole body was aching, your legs trembling slightly as
you walked back to the locker room. You looked at your phone. 3.45pm. It had
taken you longer than usual to walk back to the locker room. All the other
girls had left by now, you were the last one. You grabbed your bag, not
bothering to get changed and made your way out of the school.
The sun was beating down on you as you walked home. For once you were glad
you’d left your gym gear on, even though the weight of your bag was causing you
to walk slower than normal. As you made your way along the road your eyes
turned to see a car driving down the street towards you. It looked familiar,
but you couldn’t think where from. As it neared, the black Chevrolet Impala
slowed down to a crawl. You stopped walking and watched it as it crawled to a
stop right next to you. A voice called to you from inside. You bent down to see
who it was, not wanted to get close incase whoever it was tried to grab you.
You regretted your decision to stop immediately when you saw those deep brown
eyes staring back at you.
“Get in, I’ll give you a ride.” Negan smiled at you, a smile which was not
returned. You rolled your eyes and lent back up, continuing to walk along the
road. He had treated you like dirt at school today. You didn’t want anything
from him. The car followed you at a snail’s pace. “Y/N, come on, get in.” You
continued to ignore him, forcing yourself to focus on the path ahead. “You
really wanna walk home in this heat? Just get in doll, I promise I won’t talk
if you don’t want to.” He leant over and pushed the passenger door open. You
stopped, having an internal argument with yourself…It was hot. Really hot. It
would take you at least another 20 minutes to walk home, and with this heat, it
would probably be longer. You were tired, you didn’t have a drink. The car ride
would only be 5 minutes, if that, and like Negan said, you didn’t have to talk
to him…You reluctantly turned, throwing your bag in the car first and then
climbing in after. He was right. He didn’t talk to you. He only occasionally
looked over and smiled at you. You couldn’t help but watch him as he drove.
Your eyes took in every bit of him. He looked different now he wasn’t in the
gym stuff. He wore black trousers and a white shirt, just enough buttons undone
for you to see the start of his chest hair creeping down beneath the fabric. He
looked different without the beard, you could see his strong jawline perfectly
framing his face, the way he occasionally licked his lips as he concentrated.
“I can feel you watching me doll.” He glanced over, letting out a small laugh.
You quickly shifted in your seat, the heat bursting into your cheeks.
“I…I’m sorry.” His hand reached over and landed on our thigh, giving it a small
squeeze.
“What you sorry for? I should be sorry. I didn’t mean to be so hard on you
today.” You couldn’t move your eyes off his hand. The words struggled to come
out of your mouth.
“I..umm…yeah…you were an ass.” He let out a laugh and took his hand away from
you, your thigh still burning hot from where he’d just touched you.
“I know doll, I’m sorry, new school and that, I didn’t want anyone thinking I
had favourites already.” He looked over and winked at you. You felt the heat
rising through your body. You didn’t even know this man properly, yet he was
making you feel things you’d never felt before. You didn’t know what to say to
him, you just sat there smiling sheepishly to yourself.
You arrived home quicker than you thought you would. The drive was short but
your mind was completely awash with Negan now. You thanked him as you climbed
out, shutting the door behind you. He leaned across to the window, motioning
you before he drove away.
“If you ever want a ride doll, just come on over, or come to my office. I’ll
give you a ride.” He winked at you before pulling off and turning onto his
drive. You stood there for a moment, smiling to yourself. You’d completely
forgiven how he’d treated you at school.
 
That night you sat at your window, taking in the cool evening air. Negan had
been playing on your mind since he’d left you. You told yourself how ridiculous
you were being. It was just a stupid school girl crush, you didn’t even know
the man. He was your neighbour, he must have been at least twice your age.
Stupid. As you sat there observing the darkened street, a light turning on
across the road caught your attention. Lucille in the bedroom, getting herself
ready for bed. You watched as she tied her hair up before walking over to the
window, opening it and then shutting the curtains. You couldn’t help but feel a
little pang of jealousy deep inside. It’s just a stupid little crush. Then your
eyes darted to the garage. You saw movement down there, the door opening and
then the light turning on. Negan stood there, nothing but some sweatpants on.
You couldn’t tear your eyes away from him, watching as he moved things around.
Your eyes were taking all of him in, his bare chest, the muscles etched in his
back. You watched as he started to pull something forward. Your eyes lit up
when you saw a motorbike emerging to the front of the garage. You forgot you
were staring until your eyes locked with Negan’s. He smiled to you, pointing to
you and then the bike. You smiled, nodding. He turned away, walking out of the
garage and pulling the door, before disappearing into the house. You walked
away from the window and threw yourself on your bed. He was all you thought
about for the rest of the night.
                                      --
Your heart pounded as you walked into the bar that night. You hadn’t spoken to
Simon since you walked out on him earlier, the rage still burning pretty
fiercely within you. You were relieved to see he wasn’t there as you put your
coat and bag in his office. At least it gave you a bit of time to try and calm
down before facing him. There was a guy already sat at the bar, hunched over
his drink, and Jake was running around the bar, trying to serve the other
groups that had gathered there. Something about this man stood out to you, but
you couldn’t think what it was or why. You made your way behind the bar and the
minute you stepped foot behind that bar, your world was rocked by this one
voice. You didn’t even need to look at him to know exactly who it was.
“Get me another whiskey, doll.”
***** Chapter 6 *****
Chapter Summary
     Someone makes an unexpected appearance at the bar...
“Get me another whiskey, doll.”
That voice stopped you in your tracks. You’d barely walked behind the bar, and
now here you were, frozen. You knew he was back, but he couldn’t be here. You
refused to believe it was him. Of all the bars in this town, why would he come
to this one? Your eyes move slightly, catching a quick glimpse of the figure
that had spoken. That was all you needed. Those few seconds. You’d know that
figure anywhere. That slicked back hair, that leather jacket. He hadn’t changed
at all. His head was bowed, but you didn’t need to see his face to know it was
him. The way he sat. The way his finger circled the rim of his empty whiskey
glass. It was all him, there was no denying that. You felt something drop in
your stomach, like all the years of blocking this man out of your life had
rushed back in that second and firmly punched you straight in the stomach. You
felt a tremble begin to erupt inside you, slow at first, but the anxiety was
building with every passing second. You tried to calm yourself down. He didn’t
know it was you, he couldn’t possibly know it was you, he hadn’t even lifted
his head from that empty glass to acknowledge you. This could be quick and
painless. The money sat next to the empty glass that he idly played with. All
you had to do was make him the whiskey, take the money and give him the change.
You didn’t even have to talk to him, just those three little steps and you
could escape to the other end of the bar. I can do this. He’s just one man. You
turned, reaching for a whiskey glass, your hand shaking. You swore at yourself
under your breath, trying to convince yourself to get a grip, that you
shouldn’t be feeling like this. The ice hit the glass with a small clink that
did nothing but aggravate your nerves even more. You hand shook as you poured
the whiskey into the glass. He is just one man. As you turned to face him
again, you felt your body heat up, as though someone had thrown boiling water
over you, the heat rising from your feet upwards. It took everything in you to
push yourself forward towards him. Your eyes were locked onto him, onto this
hunched over figure at your bar. He had definitely aged, there was no denying
that, but it wasn’t a bad thing. You could see the fine grey hairs shining
their way through his black, tousled beard. The slight wrinkles around his eyes
only made him appear more human to you than he had ever done in the past. You
had almost reached him when I slight movement caught you off guard. His eyes
wandered up your figure, meeting with yours across the bar. The were as deep
and as dark as you always remembered them, that part of him hadn’t aged a
single bit. You could feel yourself get lost in them instantly, dazed by their
deep colour drawing you in. His mouth parted slightly at the sight of you. You
couldn’t stop yourself from loosing control. The glass slipped from your
shaking hand, crashing to the floor. The sudden noise forced you to break your
gaze with him, dropping straight to your knees around the broken glass. Jack
rushed over, bending down beside you.
“Y/N, are you ok?” His hand on your back grounded you, forcing you to remember
where you were.
“I’m sorry, I…I just…” You fumbled around on the floor, trying to pick up the
broken pieces of glass, when you felt a piece slide across you palm, pain
instantly radiating from the site. You swore under your breath as the blood
began to pool in your palm.
“Jesus Y/N!” Jack grabbed your hand, pressing a cloth to it, “Go get it cleaned
up, I’ll sort this out.”
You nod, feeling a lump stuck in your throat and tears welling in your eyes.
You couldn’t even look at that figure as you rush past him to the toilets. What
you didn’t see, was Negan’s gaze following you. How, when you’d dropped to your
knees, he’d risen from the chair, everything in his body telling him to go to
you, to see if you were alright. You slammed the door of toilets behind you, as
Negan finally turned back towards the bar. You threw the cloth onto the side of
the sink and ran your hand under the cold water. You stood there in silence,
trying to calm yourself down as the blood swirled down into the plughole.
Somehow whenever he was near, you just became a clumsy mess.
                                      --
You hadn’t really seen Negan since the other night. You’d seen him in passing
in the hallways at school, but your next lesson with him wasn’t until now. You
couldn’t help but feel a little nervous as you made your way to the locker
room. The more you thought about it, you weren’t sure if you’d just imagined
him and his motorbike. You decided to push it form your mind, if he didn’t
mention it then neither would you, and you doubted that he would mention
anything like that while you were in school. You got changed and made your way
to the track where Negan was waiting.
The lesson went pretty quick. Negan didn’t really talk to you at all, which you
were fine with, seeing as every time he spoke to you your nerves would start.
“Ok girls, one more time round the track and you’re done.”
His words were met with a unanimous groan, but everyone set off for one last
lap of the track. The sun was beating down and you could feel the beads of
sweat dripping down your back. You wiped the sweat from your forehead and
glanced around you as you ran. You looked around you, seeing some girls tailing
behind you, whilst others were far in front. As you looked across the field,
your eyes caught sight of Negan. Your eyes connect straight with him and you
realised he was watching you too. You couldn’t take your eyes off him. There
was something about this man than had you drawn in from the first time you saw
him. His smile caught you off guard, causing you cheeks to blush. You were
completely sucked in by him, until your face came crashing hard again the
track. You laid there, dazed for a moment, before you realised what had
happened. The pain searing through your head reminded you exactly where you
were, sprawled out on the track. You lifted your head up, your vision slightly
blurred from the hit you had just taken. You pushed yourself up to sitting when
you felt the crowd of people around you. You couldn’t focus in on any of their
mixed voices.
“Come on girls, give her some air….Get out the way.”
You knew that voice. Negan came and knelt down beside you, his hand resting on
your knee. You felt something warm and wet drip down the side of your face.
Your touched the side of your head and immediately realised it was blood. Negan
pushed your hair from your face. His expression was enough to let you know it
was bad.
“Ok girls, go get changed, that’s enough for today.” No one moved. They all
stood there staring at you sat on the floor. “I said we’re done, now go!”
Everyone suddenly jumped to life and started walking away from you and Negan.
You couldn’t felt but feel slightly nervous now you were on your own with him.
“Right we’re gonna get you up, ok?” You try to nod but the it only makes your
head hurt worse. He slips his arm around your back and holds your hand in his.
You barely have to make any effort as Negan lifts you to standing. He keeps his
arm firmly around your waist as you both make your way to his office.
His office was small, smaller than you imagined. There was a desk, a chair, and
not much else. He leant you against the desk and sat in the chair, rummaging
through one of the draws for something. The pain in your head was slowly
starting to fade to a dull ache but the embarrassment of falling in front of
Negan was still glowing in your cheeks. Negan finally pulled out a first aid
kit and pulled himself towards the desk, catching you between his legs. He
opened a bottle of water and poured a little onto the cloth.
“Right, this might sting a little.”
You nodded and closed your eyes, bracing yourself for the pain you were about
to feel. The cool cloth touched your head, causing a stinging sensation to
spread through that side of your face. Negan began to gently wipe away the
blood that had dried to the side of your face. You opened your eyes and
realised how close he was to you. You were pinned between his legs, his face
was only a few inches away from yours as he cleaned the blood up. Your heart
started to pound in our chest, so hard that you ere sure he’d hear it. You
could feel his breath on your skin. You daren’t look at him in case his eyes
met yours, but you already knew he was staring at you. You could feel his eyes
burning into your face. A sudden jolt of pain forced you to jump and let out a
small whimper.
“I’m sorry. I think that’s about as good as we’re gonna get it. All the bloods
gone though. How’d you feel?” You couldn’t help but notice the genuine concern
on his face. He was definitely different to all the other teachers.
“I’m ok. My head’s sore though.”
You still couldn’t raise your eyes to him. You could practically feel the body
heat coming off of him. He took you by surprise as his hand connected with your
face, his thumb lining its way along your jaw. He gently tilted your head,
forcing you to look at him. The moment your eyes connected it felt like someone
had pulled all the air out of your lungs. You couldn’t stop yourself staring at
them, getting completely lost in those pools of deep chocolate brown. You
weren’t sure how long you both stayed like that, both oblivious to the world
around you. You could feel him slowly moving towards you, and you realized you
were doing the same. Reality hit you like a truck and you jumped up from the
table, almost knocking Negan backwards.
“I’m sorry, I need to go.” You pushed passed his leg and made your way to the
door.
“Y/N wait! You can’t walk home in that state, I’ll give you a ride.” He doesn’t
give you much choice as the grabs his bag and follows you out of the door.
The car ride was silent. Awkward. You felt a huge sense of relief as Negan
pulled up outside of your house. You didn’t look at him as you climbed out of
the car and shut the door behind you. You ran into your house, not wanting to
even look at him. You heard his car pull off and onto his driveway as you shut
the door. You ran straight to your room, collapsing in a bundle on the floor as
soon as your door was safely locked. What was that? He’s my teacher. Was it me?
The thoughts ran rampant through your head, reliving the moment you had shared
with Negan. You knew it was wrong on so many levels, but that didn’t stop you
replaying it over and over again. His hand on your face, his breath on your
skin. You couldn’t even bring yourself to talk to him now, how were you
supposed to face him again? This is just a stupid little crush. Nothing is
gonna happen. And for the next few days it didn’t’…
 
                                      --
The loud banging on the toilet door bought you back to reality.
“Y/N!! Y/N, you in there?” It was Simon. Someone else you had been trying to
avoid. “Y/N if you don’t answer me I’m coming in!”
You quickly turned the tap off, grabbing a paper towel to try and stem the
blood.
“I’m fine. I’m fine! Just…leave me alone.”
You don’t know why you even bothered as Simon pushed the door open. If he
thought you were hurt, there would be no stopping him. He came straight for
you, pulling you into a hug. You let out a whimper as you caught your hand
against his shirt. He looks down, pulling your hand away from your chest. The
blood has pooled in your palm again.
“Y/N! What happened? You’re a mess.”
You caught sight of your reflection in the mirror and noticed your mascara had
ran. You didn’t even realized you’d been crying.
“I…I dropped a glass…I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be silly!” He pulled you back into a hug, being careful not to catch you
hand. “You don’t have to get yourself worked up over it. Come on, there’s a
first aid kit in my office.” The words hit you hard. That memory replayed in
your head again. “Y/N?”
“Sorry….umm…yeah it’ll be fine.” Simon shook his head at you, placed an arm
around you and guided you towards the door.
“It definitely doesn’t look fine. Come on, we’ll get you patched up.”
As you walked through the bar, you noticed Negan was no longer at the bar. In
fact, you couldn’t see him anywhere. You started to doubt whether it was
actually Negan at the bar in the first place, or if it was just your mind
playing tricks on you. You continued to look around as you walked to Simon’s
office but the person, whoever it was, was nowhere in sight. You made your way
to the office until Simon stopped you abruptly, just as you were about to go
in.
“Y/N, there’s someone I want you to meet. Really good friend of mine.”
You nodded, smiling at him. He brushed under cheek, and kissed your forehead.
Even though you were still mad from earlier, as soon as you were with him again
it was as if you’d forgotten all about it. He pushed the door open and you both
walked inside, but the sight that met you knocked the wind out of you.
“Y/N, this is my good friend Negan.” It wasn’t in your head. He was there.
Right there. Clear as day. You couldn’t speak.
“Well…fuck me sideways…I thought it was you out there.” Negan has that familiar
smug smile on his face. He rubbed his hand along his beard, letting out a slow
laugh. You stare at him, frozen to the spot again. You had no idea what to do.
“You not even gonna give me a hug after all these years?”
You stood there for a moment before forcing your body to take a step towards
him. You couldn’t let Simon know about you and Negan. It would break his heart,
and you didn’t want to be reliving it all again.
“Sure…Hi Negan.” You took another step over to him and lent down to hug him. He
immediately wrapped both arms around you, pulling you into a tight hug, so
tight you could barely breathe. Your hands pushed against his shoulders, trying
to distance yourself from him. As much as you tried to resist, you couldn’t
help inhaling him. He smelt as good as he always had. Whiskey, leather. It
bought all of those memories back to you.
“I’ve missed you.”
The words were so quiet you barely heard them. You jumped backwards towards
Simon. You couldn’t let him do this to you again. Not now. You felt Simon’s
hand creep onto the small of your back and it made you feel a little easier.
“Do you two know each other?”
Your reply of ‘No’ was quickly drowned out by Negan.
“Of course we do. I used to teach this pretty doll all kinds of things.” He
slyly winked at you and you prayed to God that Simon hadn’t seen that.
“Small town ay? I bet she was a handful.” Simon pulls you into a squeeze,
planting a small kiss on your cheek. Your eyes fall straight on Negan, who
hasn’t taken his eyes off you since you walked in the room. His eyebrow was
raised at you, a look of “what the fuck are you doing?” was stapled clearly
across his face. That instantly made your blood boil. Who is he to sit there
and judge me? He walked out of my life a long time ago. I don’t need his
approval! You had to get away from him.
“Simon, my hand? I need to get back to Jack, he’s on his own.”
“Oh right, sorry Y/N, sit down.”
Simon busied himself cleaning your hand up properly, taking time to wipe all
the blood away. You thanked your lucky stares that Simon had his back to Negan
and couldn’t see the way he was looking at you. It was the same look he’d given
you all those years ago. You could feel his eyes burning a hole in you but you
refused to meet his gaze again. As soon as Simon had finished, you made your
excuses and left, practically running out of that office. As soon as the smell
of old wood and beer hit you, you began to calm down. You finished off the rest
of your shift and made your excuses to Jack about needing to leave early. You
hadn’t seen Simon or Negan since you left the office and you didn’t want to
take any chances that Negan would still be there. Any other night you would
have welcomed a ride home, but not tonight. You’d had enough Negan for one day.
The cold wind stung as it hit your warm cheeks, making you tense that little
bit extra. As you walked, you felt your phone go off in your pocket. Your hands
were frozen but they managed to work long enough for you to see the messages on
your screen.

 Simon Y/N what happened? You didn’t wait for me, wanted to check you were ok.
                           Breakfast in the morning?
You couldn’t help but smile, even though you did feel guilty for doing a runner
on him again.

 You I’m sorry, hand was hurting and wanted to get home. Pick me up at 10? Xx
You walked some more of the way with a smile on your face, thinking of the next
morning you would be able to spend with Simon. No Negan. Just you and him. A
relief washed over you. Your hand was still store but you didn’t have to worry
about that. Simon had taken care of it. You phone buzzed again and you felt
yourself get slightly giddy at Simon texting you back again, but your face
dropped as soon as you saw the text.

    Unknown Was great seeing you tonight doll. You look sexier than I ever
         remember. I’m sure Simon won’t mind us getting close again ;)
The text made you stop dead in your tracks. It was Negan. Somehow, with Negan
creeping back into your life, you knew things were gonna take a tumble. You
couldn’t help the tear that made it’s way down your cheek, warming your cold
flesh. He really is back.
***** Chapter 7 *****
Chapter Summary
     The reader gets an unexpected catch up with Negan...
“Y/N, I need to see you in my office.”
You’d managed to avoid Negan for almost a week now, but he’d caught you,
standing against your locker, listening to the idle gossip of your friends. In
all truth, you might have avoided him physically, but he’d been at the front of
your mind all week. You’d even skipped class to try and avoid him, but now he’d
found you in the most obvious place, the one time you let your guard down.
“Now Y/N.”
He was already half way along the corridor as he shouted back to you. You
grabbed your bag, saying bye to your friends and then followed sheepishly
behind him. He headed straight to his office without even turning to glance at
you. Once inside, you could feel your heart pounding in your chest. He went and
sat at his desk and you stood there, awkwardly holding your bag to your
shoulder, staring down at your feet. You raised your eyes slightly to see him
sitting in his chair, staring at you, his hand idly rubbing the stubble that
was spread across his chin.
“Want to explain to me why you missed class the other day?” His voice was flat.
You couldn’t tell if it was annoyance or sadness tinting it.
“I…I went home….I was sick.” Pathetic. You cursed yourself at not being able to
come up with a better excuse.
“Really? That’s strange. How come I saw you walk out of here then?” You
hesitated, unable to give him an answer. You’d hoped he hadn’t seen you, but he
had. You couldn’t think of anything to say to him. Your mouth hung open as you
tried to think of something to say. “Why have you been avoiding me?” He
suddenly got up from the chair and started towards you which made you jump
backwards, bumping into the wall. “Did I do something?” You shook your head.
You couldn’t answer him. What were you supposed to tell him? Oh I thought you
were trying to kiss me last time we were in here but, you know, that would be
stupid, because you’re my teacher. “So what’s up?” His arm was outstretched,
resting on the wall next to your head.
“N…nothing…I just…I just feel stupid…about what happened the other day…I mean I
don’t know what happened…I just…” You trailed off as you realised he had a
smile on his face. You frowned, your eyes searching his face for the reason.
"Y/N...you just said it yourself. Nothing happened, alright?" You nodded,
almost on demandm. "Right, I don't want to see you skipping anymore lessons.
You're a bright girl Y/N, don't let anyone ever take that away from you." His
arm dropped from the wall, allowing you to leave his office. You hurried out,
your heart pounding in your chest.
                                      --
Your heart was pounding again as you made your way back to Negan’s office. It
was the end of the day and, despite how nervous you were, you thought you’d ask
him for a ride home, to try and make things normal again, at least for you. You
knocked on the door and pushed it open, immediately regretting the decision.
Negan was on the phone, his voice slightly raised, his head resting in his
hand. He looked towards you and you immediately mouthed “sorry” to him and
began to back out. He jumped forward in the chair, waving his hand, motioning
for you to stay. You hesitated before shutting the door behind you and sitting
down across the desk from him. Whoever he was talking to had really wound him
up, you’d never seen this look on his face. His eyes were dark, almost black.
He looked older, more serious than he usually did. You shifted uncomfortably in
the chair whilst he argued with whoever was on the other end of the phone. You
could tell him was getting more annoyed with each passing second.
“Lucille, I am not doing this now. I’ll talk to you tonight,” and with that he
put the phone down. He sat there for a moment, staring at the phone, before
remembering you were in the room. “I’m sorry Y/N, what’s up?” You hesitated for
a moment before answering.
“I..umm…I came to see if you could give me a ride home but…I mean…you sound
busy so it doesn’t matter.” You stand up to leave but Negan instantly jumped up
and grabs your arm.
“No Y/N wait!” He lets go of your arm as you look to him, “I’d love to give you
a ride home, let me grab my stuff and we’re good to go alright?” He flashes you
a smile and you instantly return it. He grabs his bag and escorts you out to
his car.
                                      --
The car ride was pretty quiet. You kept looking over at Negan, seeing that
something was clearly bothering him. It was written all across his face.
“Is everything okay Negan?” You expected him to brush you off but you were
surprised when he answered you.
“Just Lucille busting my balls as usual…nothing for you to worry about doll,”
and he flashed you a quick smile before turning back to the road.
You couldn’t help but be disappointed as Negan pulled up outside your house.
Despite you hardly talking, you always enjoyed being around him. You didn’t
know why, there was just something about him that drew you in. You thanked him
before jumping out and watching as he pulled onto his drive. He flashed you one
last smile before going into his house. You stood there for a moment, your mind
consumed by this man, before realising you were stood in the middle of the
street, not actually doing anything. The smallest bit of contact with this man
had your mind racing. You tried to shake the thoughts from your head, turning
on your heels and running inside.
                                      --
You hadn’t slept well at all that night. Thoughts of Negan were rampantly and
continuously running through your head, replaying intimate moments you had
shared with him. You woke up in a hot sweat, your body yearning for him. You
hated yourself for thinking about him, for wanting him, after everything that
had happened. You got out of bed and grabbed a towel, hoping that a shower
would settle your mind down.
As you got out of the shower, there was a knocking at your door. You grabbed
your phone off the side and looked at the time. 10.05am. Shit! You ran to the
door with the towel wrapped around you. Your heart pounded in your chest at the
sight of who was stood there. Your eyes darted straight past Simon to the
figure who was stood behind him. Simon was talking to you but you couldn’t take
your eyes off Negan, who was leant against the wall with that smug smile
plastered across his face.
“Y/N?...” Simon’s voice snapped you back to attention and your hand clung to
the towel draped around you. “Everything ok? Why aren’t you dressed?” You
looked to Simon and saw that warm smile of him, immediately putting you at
ease.
“I..umm…I must have overslept. I’m sorry.” Your eyes flicked between Simon and
Negan. You couldn’t help but feel disappointed that Negan was stood there, but
at the same time, those old feelings were beginning to shake your core. You
hated him, but at the same time you wanted nothing more than to feel his touch
again.
“So are you gonna let us in or you gonna make us stand out here while you get
ready?” Simon winked at you and you immediately felt your cheeks blush. You
stepped to the side to let him in and he stopped to plant a small kiss on your
cheek as he passed. Your heart pounded as Negan approached you, his eyes dark,
staring straight into you. With just that look he made you feel like you were
18 all over again. He lent into you, his hand brushing your hip. You could feel
his breath on your neck.
“Doll…me and you need to have a little chat.”
His lips brushed against your skin, instantly turning your legs to jelly. You
could feel your stomach doing flips. A burning feeling rose from your stomach,
a mixture of lust and hate for this man, you just hoped that Simon hadn’t seen
him. You closed the door behind them and walker over to the door leading to
your bedroom. Negan had made himself comfortable on the sofa while Simon stood
near the window. You observed the two men for a moment, trying to work out how,
after so many years, your life had led you back to him.
“I’m just gonna get ready, I won’t be long.”
Simon gave you an acknowledging smile and nod, which you returned. Then your
eyes fell to Negan. That smile was still plastered across his face, his eyes
burning into you. Just as you went to turn away, you caught sight of him
winking at you. In all these years, he’s not changed one bit.
                                      --
Simon took you to your usual place for breakfast. You’d hardly said a word as
Simon and Negan had chatted the whole way through you eating. Simon had decided
to sit next to you this time, his hand occasionally grazing your knee under the
table. As much as you would normal love it, you couldn’t relax with Negan
burning a hole in you from across the table. Simon’s phone rang and he quickly
excused himself from the table. You’d been dreading this, being alone with
Negan. You tried to avoid looking at him but you saw him stretch out, lean back
and stare at you with a smile on his face. He let out a slow laugh and you felt
your heart pounding away.
“So doll…when did this happen?” You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him
again.
“It’s none of your business.” You couldn’t help your voice shaking. You hoped
that after all these years you could be adult about this, but Negan would
always be a sore point for you.
“Fair play.” He sat there string at you, his eyes raking over your face,
tapping his fingers on the edge of the table. You couldn’t stop the anger that
was bubbling over inside from spilling all over the table. You slammed your
fist onto the table, almost knocking your coffee over.
“What are you even doing back here?” You tried to slow your breathing down,
adrenaline was rushing through your veins.
“There’s the girl I remember,” he let out a small laugh, “I could ask you the
same question.”
“My family is here.” Your blood was boiling. You knew you were getting angrier
by the second but you couldn’t stop it. “What exactly is your excuse? I don’t
see Lucille with you. Did she finally see sense and leave you?” As soon as the
words left your mouth you regretted saying it. His whole demeanour changed. He
slumped back in the chair, his eyes dropped down to his lap. For a moment he
actually seemed human to you.
“Yeah…she’s gone. She died.”
The words sucked the air right out of your lungs. Now Negan was the one who
couldn’t look at you. You didn’t know what to do or say. The only thing you
could manage to do was the reach out and grab his hand. You knew Lucille had
been ill when they left but you never imaged she would die. A huge sadness fell
over you. You had betrayed Lucille in the biggest way, but you would never have
wished this on her, or Negan, despite how much you hated him. You quickly
pulled your hand away when you noticed Simon rushing back to the table. The
look on his face said it all and you knew exactly what was coming.
“I’m really sorry I…” He didn’t get chance to finish.
“You need to go?” You couldn’t hide the annoyance in your voice. He leant over
to grab his coat and planet a small kiss on your cheek.
“I will make it up to you I promise. The delivery’s come and it’s messed up, I
need to sort it. I’m sure Negan’ll take care of you and I’ll see both tonight
ok?”
He didn’t even give you a chance to reply before he was already out of the door
of the restaurant. You slumped back in the chair, staring vacantly at the cup
of coffee in front of you. This was getting to become a bad habit of Simon’s.
You were disturbed from your thoughts by Negan clearing his throat.
“He do that often?” That smug smile had resumed its place back on his face. You
rolled your eyes and immediately decided you weren’t doing this. You grabbed
your jacket and stood up, before Negan reached across the table, grabbing your
wrist. “Oh come on doll, sit down.” You glared at his hand on your wrist, and
then at him.
“Get off me. You don’t get to call me doll anymore.” He let go of your wrist,
letting out a slow laugh he held his hands up.
“Come on Y/N, I just wanna talk.” You looked at him, into his deep brown eyes,
and all the feelings you had when you were younger came flooding back. You had
tried to bury those feelings for years, tried to convince yourself that you
were over him, but here, with him sat in front of you, having not changed a
single bit, those feelings came back full force. You hated him so much, but
also wanted nothing more than to feel his touch again. You sat down, your eyes
locked onto him.
“Talk then.” You folded your arms, glaring at him across the table. You were
determined not to make this easy for him.
“How’ve you been?” You couldn’t help but scoff at the question. You shook your
head. This is a mistake.
“Goodbye Negan.”
“No Y/N,” he leant forward to you grabbing your hand, “I really want to know.”
You sighed. He sounded sincere, you wanted to believe he was, but you knew him
all too well.
“You really wanna know? I’ve had the worst past few years of my life. Since
you…” A lump appeared in your throat when you thought back to the night that
Negan had left, “…since you left…my life just went…” your eyes began to fill
with tears as you thought of those years spent with Ben, “It went to shit.”
An awkward silence fell between you both. Negan squeezed your hand, something
he had always done, his little way of showing some sort of affection, although
you knew how rare that was for him. You sat there for a moment appreciating the
small gesture, before reality brought you back to your senses. The physical
contact between you felt all too normal and you pulled your hand away.
“What happened?”
“I really don’t wanna talk about it Negan.”
Negan didn’t say anything, he only sat there observing you. You couldn’t bring
yourself to look at him. You felt a tear make its way from your eye and slide
down your cheek. Before you could even think about wiping it away, you felt
Negan’s touch once again. His thumb brushed your cheek, wiping the tear away.
His hand rested against your jaw, cradling your face. You’d forgotten how much
you loved his touch, how good he felt against your skin. You closed your eyes,
enjoying the feel of him. It reminded you of how it used to be, on those nights
when there was just the two of you, those stolen moments when you snuck into
his office. Stop it Y/N! Your eyes snapped open and you jumped up from the
chair, throwing your coat on.
“I’m sorry, I can’t do this. I can’t be around you.” The tears were falling
from your eyes. Your emotions were running wild in your head. Negan jumped up
from his chair and grabbed your hand again.
“Let me walk you home.” The look on his face was sincere, but he was making the
past you had tried so hard to get over real again.
“I…I can’t. I’m sorry.” And with that, you left, practically running out of the
restaurant, leaving Negan alone at the table, watching you as you ran down the
street.
                                      --
It had been a few days since Negan gave you a ride home and you hadn’t stopped
thinking about him since. You had spotted him outside his house a few times,
but you hadn’t managed to talk to him. You knew it was none of your business,
but you couldn’t help but think about how upset he had been on that ride home.
You sat, staring out of your bedroom window when you spotted a figure pulling a
motorcycle out of Negan’s garage. It was him. Without even a second thought you
leapt from the window and rushed out of the house towards him. He was just
putting his helmet on as you reached him.
“Negan!” You realised how out of breath you were from that short run. Negan set
his helmet back down on the motorcycle and turned to you smiling.
“Well now….what can I do for you doll?” Your eyes zoned in on his smile, and
you felt it lighting up the dusky street.
“I…um…I wanted to see if you were ok…you know…after the other day.” You hated
that you became so nervous around him. He let out a small laugh and put his
hand on your shoulder, the feeling sending a hot rush through your body.
“You’re checking in on me?” He let out another laugh and leaned against his
bike, folding his arms across his chest. “That sweet, doll…I’m fine.” You
hadn’t really planned much after this and you were unsure what to say. You
smiled at him and then turned around, ready to walk home. Negan reached out,
grabbing your arm. “You wanna come for a ride?” Your heart begins to pound in
your chest at his words.
“Can I?” Your voice is shaky, and Negan laughs at how nervous you are.
“Sure. Here, put these on.”
He walks away and comes back with a helmet and leather jacket. He helps you put
the jacket on and then slips the helmet on your head, securing it under your
chin. Negan climbed on the bike and then motioned for you to climb on. You
climbed on, trying not push yourself too close to Negan. He didn’t give you
much choice though as he grabbed your hand and pulled it firmly around his
waist, forcing your body to jolt forward against his.
“Hold on tight, ok?”
You instantly wrapped your other arm around him and the bike roared into
action. You held on tight and rested your head against his back as the bike
rumbled out onto the street and then sped away down the road.
 
                                      --
Negan had driven across town and pulled into a quiet park that overlooked the
town. It was getting dark but you felt safe with Negan. You were perched on his
bike as he lent against it. Neither of you said anything, you just sat
observing the town lights. You were still wearing the jacket Negan had given
you. It smelt exactly like him and you couldn’t help but hold it close to you,
inhaling it. Your body was still recovering from the adrenaline rush of being
on a motorcycle for the first time and your body was still feeling the
vibrations from it. You tried to stop yourself from shaking but the air was
cooling now and the slight chill from the wind only amplified your shaking.
Negan looked over at you, a slight concern on his face.
“You alright doll? I can feel you shaking.” You nodded, smiling at him.
“Yeah, I’m fine, just a bit cold.” He winked and you and moved closer, wrapping
his arm around you and pulling you close to his chest. The sudden gesture made
your heart thump in your chest, it was so hard you were sure Negan was going to
feel it. That familiar lump had appeared in your throat and you found it hard
to swallow. Negan held you close, not loosening his grip at all. You’re not
sure how long you stayed like that until Negan pulled away slightly. You looked
up at him and realised he was staring at you. You’d never seen the look on his
face before. His eyes had darkened, there was something burning in them. Your
hand had absently gliding to his chest, resting in the centre. You could feel
his heart pounding underneath, just as hard as yours was. He brushed a stray
hair away from your face, his thumb lining its way along your jaw. You knew
what was about to happen and you knew it shouldn’t but you couldn’t force your
body away from him. His lips closed in on yours and the moment they touched it
felt like a huge eruption inside of you. They were soft against yours, the heat
travelled from his lips to yours. In that moment it felt like everything was
stood still. You knew in your head that this was wrong, that you shouldn’t be
doing this, but your body wouldn’t let you pull away. Negan held you tightly
against him, his lips moving against yours. When he finally pulled away from
you, you felt like you ere finally able to breathe again, as if the kiss had
pulled all the air from your lungs. You looked up at him and his face had
changed. There was now concern on it, a sadness had crept in behind his eyes.
He dropped his arms from you and turned around to grab his helmet.
“I’m sorry. I should take you home.”
Without even glancing in your direction he passes you your helmet. You don’t
utter a word to him and climb on the bike after him. You were still trying to
process what had just happened. You knew it was wrong, but that kiss, being
with him. For a moment it felt like that was how it was supposed to be. Negan
didn’t utter another word to you. When you arrived back at his house, you
silently took off the jacket and helmet and placed it on the bike. Negan still
refused to look as you and you felt a huge sadness wash over you as you walked
away. You looked back over to him before entering your house and saw him
hunched over, leaning on the bike, as though he was deep in thought. You took
one last look at him and walked in your house, still playing that kiss on
repeat in your head.
End Notes
     Gone for a different vibe with this one, pre apocalypse so don't be
     expecting any walkers jumping out! Hope you enjoy it and if you do,
     be sure to check out my other work! Comments and kudos always greatly
     appreciated =) Thanks guys x
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
their work!