Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/12539784. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Dungeons_and_Dragons_(Cartoon), Dungeons_&_Dragons_-_All_Media_Types Relationship: Eric_"the_Cavalier"/Lorne_"the_Vagrant" Character: Eric_"the_Cavalier", Lorne_"the_Vagrant" Additional Tags: Alternate_Universe_-_Canon_Divergence, Slow_Burn Stats: Published: 2017-10-28 Updated: 2017-11-20 Chapters: 3/? Words: 4427 ****** Odyssey Of The Twelfth Child ****** by RJF Summary Lorne has been on his own for as long as he can remember, what happens when he finally finds someone who gets him and his acid sense of humor. Will the Lone Wolf join the pack or run away. A re-telling of "Odyssey Of The Twelfth Talisman". Notes So... *puts hipster glasses on and speaks with an annoying, pretentious tone* there were a few thing that irked me about the episode Odyssey Of The Twelfth Talisman's internal logic : 1 - The idea that the "Stone of Astra" is too dangerous is Bullshit. I get that the writer's intent was for the "Stone of Astra" to be an item that brings misfortune upon its owner because it's so powerful that everyone else wants to steal it. But that falls flat when you consider that that's EXACTLY what kids' magical items are. Venger antagonizes them again and again because he wants steal their magical weapons. So that's some faulty logic right there.   2 - The idea that the "Stone of Astra" can't be controlled is also BS. Korlock uses it just fine when he fights against Venger. Lorne just needs practice, that's all.   3 - Lorne leaving with the caravan's makes no goddamn sense. In the beginning the caravan's leader clearly says they can't spare food and have no place fo him on the tribe. It more logical for him to stick around with the kids than to leave with people he doesn't know.   Am I overthinking an over thirty years old children's cartoon? Yes, yes I am. And also, I wanted to write this because I'm a dumb romantic and I think Eric and Lorne are good together. ***** Chapter 1 - Prologue ***** The last of the four suns was beginning to set in The Realm, painting the sky a beautiful shade of purple. But Lorne didn't care about how beautiful the void above his head looked right now. The coming of night only signified that he would be sleeping without having had a meal. Again. "Looks like today will be another day I go without filling you" Lorne said to himself while rubbing his belly. "Ah, what I wouldn't give for a roast cockatrice right now. It doesn't even have to be a big one." Lorne let out a sight of frustration and kicked some small rocks that were in front of him. It's no use daydreaming, I'm never gonna find any food out here. I should just find a place to sleep already. Lorne examined his surroundings for a spot to pass the night. The plain field he was on had a few small patches of grass and several months old, destroyed caravans. It was, no doubt, the scene of a caravan raid many moths ago. Any one of those destroyed caravans would suffice as shelter for the night, Lorne figured. He approached the one nearest to him, a caravan which had fallen on it's side and had a big hole on the roof, now working as a 'door'. But before he entered something caught Lorne's eye. A few feet away was the carcass of an animal, inside what used be the thorax of the creature was an unusually shinny thing. Lorne could not tell what the shinny thing was from afar or why he cared, but he felt compelled to approach the bones of the dead beast. "What's this?" Lorne knelt down and removed the skull from it's place so he could grab what he now could tell was a shinny stone. He pulled it from the ground to reveal it had a simple leather attached to it. Lorne held it in his hands and cleaned it with the sleeve of his right arm. He could see it clearly now that it was a necklace. The stone that attracted him was a large, round fuchsia gemstone with a pink colored star carved in it.   "Ooh pretty." Lorne hanged the necklace around his neck. It's got to be worth at least a few loaves of bread. Lorne then remembered there was a tribe who had settled not too far from where he is right now. He is sure he could trade with them. Motivated by his stomach, Lorne heads for the tribe before it gets too dark. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------- "Okay, okay. So maybe six loaves of bread is too much. Surely this talisman is worth five loaves." Lorne said trying to turn this negotiation around. It was clearly not going his way. "No, no. Even if people could spare it, five loaves is too many." The tribe's leader said resolute. "Go. Leave us. Go back to your people. We have no room for you here." Fine, I got the fucking message. "Thanks a lot. And you can keep your old bread."Lorne says, indignant as he walks from way the tribe's leader."Asshole." He mutters under his breath. Guess it's back to nowhere on an empty stomach. What Lorne didn't know was that he was being watched by a servant of the forces of evil. Floating in the distance Shadow Demon had seen the entire exchange between Lorne and tribesman but what caught his eye was the necklace around the boy's neck. "It can't be! The Stone of Astra! Master will be pleased to hear this." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------- Now on Venger's castle, his spectral goon relays the news to him. "Are you certain of what you saw Shadow Demon?" Venger's voice booms through the air. "I am master, the boy carries the Stone of Astra around his neck." Shadow Demon half stutters. "Very well." Venger says, and with a snap of his fingers summons his flying steed Nightmare. He mounts it and in his usual dramatic fashion proclaims "With the mystical stone's laser I'll cut through anything in my path. Not even Tiamat will be able to oppose me." ***** Chapter 2 - Meet Cute ***** Chapter Notes Reading this whole thing will be easier if you've seen the episode. If you need to refresh your memory here it is : https:// www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZtu1iX1XSU Also if want a laugh watch this : https://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=4Ufbr-AQPqM "It's going to work. Trust me." Eric said, trying to convince the other kids. "Sure it will. Just like your plan to steal the crown of Bat Queen last week worked." Bobby sassed Eric up. "It would have worked if Presto had summoned a red balloon like I told him to." "But I g-" Presto tried to defend himself but was cut off by Hank. "Look here comes Diana!" He said pointing to the group's Acrobat, who is now being chased by an angry stampede of catoblepas on the other side of the artificial lake from where the group is standing. Diana readies her javelin when she sees the covered lake come in to view, a few more steps and she makes it expand, fixates it on the ground when she almost at the edge and propels herself gracefully through the air, joining the kids on the other side. The stampede follows Diana and falls right into the lake. Gotcha! "I saw it, but I don't believe it." Said an incredulous Hank. "Yeah, it... it worked!" Bobby joined Hank in voicing his disbelief. You're goddamn right it did. "So just like I planned, our rides arrived." Eric said with a smug smirk, beaming with the confidence of an underdog who's finally hit a lucky break. The mood shifted quickly from disbelief to joy. The kids started to shower Eric with praise. "All right Eric. Way to go!" Hank enthused and gave Eric a friendly pat on the shoulder. Sheila, ever the over-apologizer, spoke for the whole group when she said "I'm sorry we ever doubted you." and hugged the boy on the side. Her brother followed with "Yeah, way to go Eric."  Even Uni let out a happy neigh. Eric was concentrating very hard not to blush from all the praise. He's tried, many times now, to win even a whit of respect from the group, to no avail. Even though his criticism of the cheap fortune cookie sayings Dungeon Master likes to pass as advice, and DM's general unhelpfulness, is legitimate; even though the group would already be home by now if they were just a little bit more selfish like Eric has suggested time and time again, even though HIS ZINGERS ARE ALWAYS ON POINT, he never sees the respect he deserves. But right now. This. This feels nice. This is fleeting too because Eric still has to tame the horses from hell he just trapped. And the girls are clinging just a little too close to him. "Erm. The lure Presto, if you please." Eric says, still keeping his pompous shtick going. The magician reluctantly conjures a red apple from his hat and hands it to Eric. "I don't know about this Eric, they sound awful mad." Presto voices his concern after handing his friend the fruit. "Thank you." Eric tries to pay no mind to his friend's warning but it does get to him. Right, right this is going great. Don't fuck it up now Eric.Eric approaches the edge of the lake with the apple in hand. "Here horsey, horsey."  He dangles the apple, inviting the catoblepas attention on him. Eric's taunt only serves to anger the beasts even further. The catoblepas nearest to Eric tries to bite his arm and he manages to get his arm out the way just in time. The creatures find their footing an quickly climb out of the lake, now with a single target in mind.  Eric staggers back, nearly falling on his ass. There's no use now, he recognizes this went south. Oh man. They're never gonna let me live this down.Eric turns around and runs for it. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------- What the hell is all this noise?Lorne is woken by several loud noises he can't immediately make out. It takes a moment for him to recognize it as the thundering sound of hoofbeats. He gets up quickly to appraise the situation. There was what it looked like a stampede of catoblepas on the distance quickly coming his way and some... kids, who looked like they have been running from the beasts, due to their visible tiredness were a few feet away from Lorne. "Can't run anymore. We got fight" Lorne heard a guy all dressed in green say in between pants. He readies his bow, which Lorne notices has no string and isn't loaded with any arrow, and fires somethingin the catoblepas' direction,but it doesn't slow them down. Lorne then notices that next to him, hiding behind a bush was a guy wearing armor and red cape. And behind him one of the beasts, that has apparently splintered from the pack, was just about to bite his head off. Lorne can't explain why he did it or how he reacted so fast, but he put one foot after the other, ran and jumped and pushed the guy out of the catoblepas' maw's way. It didn't occur to Lorne, of course, that by doing this he only be doubling the catoblepas' dinner size. The infernal horse focuses his attention on the newer pray, and attempts bite him now. Damn. Lorne instinctively crosses his arms in front of his head and prepares for the worse. But just then, the gem on the necklace around his neck lights up and shoots a pink lightning-like ray in the creature's direction. It dodges the ray, but it becomes scared enough to turn around and run away. The ray then continues flail around Lorne's surroundings, cutting down trees and rocks in its way before shutting down. Lorne can not believe what happened. He holds the now dormant gem in his hands and gazes at it in shock, as if hoping it would explain itself to him. How..? Did I do that?He is shaken out of his daze when he hears a cheerful "All right, that's what I call a weapon." He turns his attention to the group of kids, which seems to be joined by a small unicorn, and finds himself alone with them on they now much destroyed environment. The catoblepas are no longer a threat as they have been scared off by his necklace's ray. Before he can identify and reply to whoever said that, the boy Lorne just saved got back on his feet and said: "That's what I call rude. Listen hotshot next time be more careful who you're crashing into." while pointing at him. Lorne has a comeback ready on tip of his tongue but one of the kids defuses the situation before Lorne can say anything. A red haired girl, around Lorne's age, wearing a purple hood approaches them along with the rest of the group and says "C'mon Eric he did save your life." Eric. So that's this ungrateful asshole's name." But the girl's words do make Lorne's rescuee change his tune. "Oh he did didn't he?" He clears his throat and before letting out an insincere "Thanks" and extending his hand towards Lorne, for him to shake. Which Lorne doesn't do, instead he snarks : "Don't mean it." "Don't worry, I won't." The other boy says. Maybe I should have let the horse take a bite of you. The tension is cut short once again, when another of one of Eric's group teases him. "So Eric who's your new friend?" Says the shortest one, in a barely there shirt and horned helmet. "Are you kidding? You mean this guy has friends?" "Sure, us." A handsome blonde guy, the one Lorne had seen fire his bow earlier, approaches him and shakes his hand. "Boy you and that weapon sure showed up at the right time. Uh..?" I better no tell them I don't know how I did that. "Name's Lorne." "Listen Lorne, what do you say you come along with us?" What? Just like that. "Well I..." They must have food if he's offering me to join them."Sure." "What do you say guys? Is Lorne in?" The blonde turns and asks the group, who all voice their agreement in unison, except for that Eric guy, who lets out an ironic "Whoopie." "All right, let's find a campsite before nightfall."The handsome guy, who Lorne assumes is the leader says, closing the deal. I guess I'm in. Let's see how this is goes. ***** NIght Time ***** After acquiring a new member and walking around a bit the group decided to settle near a waterfall for the night. Lorne has been trying to get a sense of the character of his new traveling companions. They all seem to have been traveling together for a long time, he can tell by their interaction that they are very familiar with each other. The tall, blonde one is called Hank. Everyone appears to defer to him. He is nice to look at, but doesn't have much of a personality beyond being the leader. Diana seems like his second-in-command and the most spirited of them all. Sheila, by contrast, is the shy, quiet one. Lorne hasn't heard her talk much the whole time he's joined. Mostly she opens her mouth to boss her little brother, Bobby, around. He's the youngest of the bunch and pretty much a normal kid. He's always hanging around his pet unicorn, uncreatively named Uni. Presto is the awkward boy with the oversized robes and glasses. And then there's Eric. He's an asshole. Lorne is still puzzled by their readiness to invite a complete stranger to join them out of the blue. Maybe it was that thing my necklace did that convinced them. Maybe they wanna steal it. Maybe they're just waiting for me to fall asleep to grab it. Lorne entertains mistrust briefly but soon dismiss it. Even someone as cynical as him understands that sometimes people are just nice. I could do worse that be stuck with this lot. And they are very nice people, Lorne figures. Lorne finds a spot to lay down and watches absently minded as the other kids settle around the campfire Diana had just lit. "Okay everyone let's hit the bed. We have a long day of walking tomorrow," Hank orders in between yawns. "The unfortunately, strictly metaphorical bed," Eric complained. Sleep!? What about food? Lorne grumbles mentally. I can't ask for food without seeming like an opportunist. I've met them less than hours ago. Fine! I've went longer without food, I can wait.But Lorne's stomach let out a growl, betraying his defiant thoughts. He ran his hand around his belly, as if caressing it. Shush, just wait until tomorrow.It is then that Lorne catches Eric looking at him on the corner of his eyes. Great, that's just what I need. "You know what? Presto, I'm ready for dinner when you are," Eric says in a bossy tone. "Eric! Presto is not your manservant. Don't talk to him like that you," Diana snaps at him. "What, like you aren't hungry," Eric fires back. "Yeah, running away from those horses made me hungry," Bobby said rubbing his belly. "I'm hungry too. And by the way, that would be supper not dinner Eric," Sheila says. "Oh, all right, hope you're in the mood for some all-italian cuisine," Presto says excitedly, Lorne watched as the shy boy took his hat out his head, put one hand inside of it and pulled a giant, long bread split lengthwise in two loaves and filled in the middle with meat and vegetables Lorne didn't recognize. And then he pulled another and another and another and handed those over to the group. Lorne watched the scene astonished, mouth hanging open. Did I really just see that?He was snapped out of his bewilderment when Presto turned around to hand him his sandwich. "Here you go Lorne." "You can just pull food out of your hat?" Lorne blurted out as he accepted the food from his new traveling companion. Presto snickered at Lorne's surprise. "Yeah it's pretty handy, when it wants to work anyway." "You're amazing!" Presto grew a big dumb grin and his cheeks flushed red. "I mean it's the hat that does it, not me." Lorne looked at what was going to be his dinner, and first meal in two days, as he held it in his hands. It's definitely the longest bread Lorne's ever seen and all the... stuff in the middle looks completely alien to him. The smell of it was good but it looked very strange to Lorne. Who's ever heard of such a thing as bread being a wrapper for other food? But he was so hungry he wouldn't complain. Lorne gave the first bite, and his worries immediately dissolved into nothing. The bread was just the right amount of crusty and the flavors of all the vegetables and meat Lorne didn't know danced on his tongue. Lorne then gave another bite, and another and soon the sandwich disappeared. "It looks like someone hasn't learned how to chew yet," Eric mocked Lorne's speed in eating his sandwich. "Why Eric, are you offering to feed me like a baby bird?" Lorne snarked back, but turned his attention elsewhere before the cavalier could reply. "Do you want another?" Presto asked. Lorne was a little reluctant, he didn't want to seem like he was taking advantage of the group's hospitality, but he was oh so hungry so he said "If it's not too much trouble." "None at all."  Presto whipped up another and handed to the hungry vagrant. "You need to tell me where I can find one of these," Lorne said between nibbles pointing to Presto's hat. "I don't think Dungeon Master has spares." "Oh yeah that is something you should know now that you're with us." Hank sprung up from where he was seating. "We all have a magical weapon." This was followed by a demonstration, which Lorne watched while eating his second sandwich. Hank grabbed his bow and fired an energy arrow in to the night sky, it exploded high above the ground like a firework, lighting up the camp briefly. So that's what a saw back then. Sheila followed Hank's lead, demonstrating her own item. She pulled up the hood of her cloak, and disappeared before Lorne's eyes. Where did she go? She pulled it down again, and rematerialized. Ok, I see how that can be useful. Then it was Diana's turn to show off. She held her staff in her hands and made it expand and contract.Not terribly impressive. Bobby then picked up his club and stroke the ground, making it shake. That's very impressive! "I'm not doing that. It's a shield," Eric said gesturing to it, "you can guess what it does." "It makes you even more thickheaded?" Lorne snarks. "I got my hat, but you've already seen what it can do," Presto says, a little sad he can't show off like the others. "And Uni's has her horn. It makes her teleport," Bobby excitedly pitches in. Soliciting a very happy neight from Uni. "We're all much like you and your necklace." "Oh sothat's why you asked me to join the club." Lorne's comment elicited a row of laughter from the group, even Eric let out a chuckle.  "I haven't actually asked, but do you have a destination in mind? The nearest city is two days away," Lorne asks. "Well not really, we're just going west," Hank explains. "West? Why?" "We are looking for a thing. The Stone of Astra." "The Stone of Astra? And you'll find that by going west?" "At least that's what Dungeon Master told us," Sheila says with a sight. "Right, who is that?" "Dungeon Master is a tiny old man who always shows up out of nowhere to tell us useless riddles." Eric explained, leaving Lorne more confused. "What Eric means is that Dungeon Master is sort of our... guide. He's the one who gave us our weapons, and he appears to us from time to time to give us advice on how we can get home," Hank corrected. "And where's home?" The question seemed to embarrass the group. They never had to explain their situation to an outsider, at least not specifically. Hank hesitates to answer for fear Lorne might think they're crazy, but he says: "It's... um... not in this world." "What do you mean "not in this world"?" "It means exactly that. We're not from the Realm," Eric cuts in. "Where are you from?" "New Castle, Pennsylvania," Eric says a hint of sadness in his voice. "Castle Pennsylvania?" "No it's a city named New Castle on the state of Pennsylvania," Hank tries to explain. "I see." The more they explained the more confused Lorne got. He still didn't understand where his apparently otherworldly companions came from, but let the issue drop. He's seen a lot, a lot of weird, supposedly impossible thing in his travels. If they say they're not from this world, who is he to disagree? They look very normal for aliens tough, perhaps it's a disguise. "And how long have you been in the Realm?" "Too goddamn long." Eric bemoans. "About for four months? It's hard to keep track of time when there are four suns," Diana guesses. "Four long, torturous months under four hot, scorching suns, Eric complains." "I never would have guessed you're not from here. You look like, well, locals if I've seen them." "Dungeon Master also gave us a makeover when he gave us our weapons," Eric explains. "I understand but you look like a regular adventuring party." "That's cause we've got lots of experience fighting bad guys," Bobby exclaims. "Do you now?" "Trouble has a tendency to find us, Hank says a little ashamed." "Like the stampede from earlier today?" "No, that was trouble Eric found," Diana throws shade, before explain it further "the trouble that finds us usually comes in the form of a dictator who's oppressing their people or an evil demon who's terrorizing a village or a nasty wizard who's taken someone hostage. "Or Venger, Presto says." Lorne fears he mustn't have heard that right. Did he really say what Lorne think he said? "Venger!?" "You know him?" Sheila asks. "I know of him. Everyone knows of Venger. Everyone knows he is the power that rules the Realm, that every single king and queen bows to him, unless they want their entire kingdom burn to the ground. Everyone knows he has an enormous army of orcs and demons and lizard men, and that he rides into battle mounted on his Nightmare. Everyone knows that if you cross him you better hope for death, because even death is better than being thrown on his Prison of Agony. I can't believe you've met him!" "Not only met, but we kicked his ass," Bobby boasts. "Multiple times," Eric completes. Lorne is stunned by this revelation. These kids defeated Venger? They really must be from another other world. "So you should consider yourself lucky you're traveling with us," Eric bragged. "I really am so lucky to be traveling with the guy I just saved from becoming catobepas' lunch." Lorne's joke made the group laugh and Eric got flustered, he had no comeback to that, he did own Lorne his life. "Okay everyone, now that we're all fed we should go to sleep," Hank says as he stops laughing. The group settles and readies itself to sleep. They wish each other good night and after a few moments have passed Lorne could already hear some snores. Lorne had lain down next to Eric and even tough he considered him an ass, he had nice something to say to him. "Hey, Eric. Are you asleep yet?" "Not anymore, I'm not. What do you want?" "I just wanted to say thanks." "Huh. What for?" "You know, for the food thing." "I didn't do that, Presto did." "I know, but you saw I was hungry and you asked him to do it." "I don't know what you're talking about. I didn't do that for you, I was hungry too." "Sure," Lorne said sarcastically, "Thanks anyway." There was an awkward moment of silence before either said something. "Are you hungry often? I mean do you-." "Do I starve? Some days. I can't always find something edible on the road." "Man that's rough. I'm sorry." "Yeah, not everyone has magic hat they can pull food out of. But why are you asking? Is 'malnourished' written on my forehead?" "It's just that I've never seen anyone eat a submarine sandwich so fast and with so much gusto." Lorne giggles and says: "It was a very good, uh, sandwisk." "It's sandwich. And that is nothing compared to the junk food we have back home." "Junk food?" "Yeah. It's stupidly tasty food, that is stupidly bad for you." "Because it's made out of junk?" "No that's just the name. It's food made out of food." "And you're a fan of this 'junk food'." "Of course! Hamburgers, hot dogs, french fries, pizza. Oh man what I wouldn't give for a hot slice of pepperoni pizza. "Is that your favorite junk?" "Hell yeah. There's nothing like pepperoni pizza." "Can't Presto magic that up as well?" "The last time he tried to conjure pizza he pulled a miniature of the tower from his hat." "A tower made of pizza?" "No the tower is made of, you know, brick and stuff. It's just the name that's similar." "Oh, your world sounds so weird." "I guess if creepy dungeons and angry dragons are your normal, my world can sound pretty weird." "There are no dragons in your world?" "Nope! No dragons or crazy wizards or giant spiders there. In my world the streets have lights so you can walk at night, and electric showers so you can take warm baths. And there's this thing called the internet where you can talk to people no matter how far they are, and play games and watch videos." "What's a video?" "It's like an image that moves with sound." "Uh..." Lorne sounded audibly confused. "I guess it's one of those that you can't explain, you have to see it for yourself." "Your whole world sounds like one of those things you can't explain." "You should come with us." "What?" "When we finally find a way out of this medieval hellhole, you should come with us." "Leave the Realm for a world I don't know?" "Yeah. Why not? It's much better than here. You need to be introduced to pepperoni pizza, my treat." "I'll think about it." "You do that." "Goodnight Eric." "Night." Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!