Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/6103984.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Underage
  Category:
      F/M
  Fandom:
      InuYasha_-_A_Feudal_Fairy_Tale
  Relationship:
      Higurashi_Kagome/Sesshoumaru
  Character:
      InuYasha_(InuYasha), Sesshoumaru_(InuYasha), Higurashi_Kagome
  Additional Tags:
      Original_Character(s), Alternate_Universe
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-02-25 Chapters: 4/? Words: 7709
****** Neither Forgive Nor Forget ******
by HelloCandy
Summary
     Kagome develops amnesia after she has been in a car accident. While
     trying to remember her life, memories best left buried, comes to the
     surface via her dreams. Questions arise when trying to understand
     their meaning. Can Sesshomaru help his mate? Or will the past repeat
     itself?
Notes
     HelloCandy found on both Dokuga as well as FF is me, as well as
     NightTenshi/Night-chan found on Mediaminor and various Inuyasha
     fanfiction sites.
***** Prologue + Ch 1 *****
Prologue
Not being able to concentrate on paperwork, Kagome put it away in her desk.
After all, who could focus on the world’s past when she was too excited about
here and now. Leaving her office, Kagome felt like she was on cloud nine, as
her excitement soared. Earlier, she had received results from her doctor that
she and Sesshomaru were expecting. Walking past the night guard of the museum,
she said her good nights.
“Oh Mrs. Taisho, don’t forget your umbrella,” the night guard called to her.
“Thank you Akimaru-kun,” Kagome smiled, bowed, and walked out the door into the
rain toward her car.
Entering her car, Kagome had an awful, vague feeling about leaving so soon.
However her joy overpowered her fear and she left cautiously, keeping in mind
the weather. Four blocks away from the museum, Kagome waited at the light and
connected her Bluetooth to her phone to call her mate. After a long wait she
hung up and realized that he must have been busy. Even more than usual, since
he took major precautions to make sure his company is running like a well-oiled
machine. With the other cars now gone, Kagome inched her car to the corner to
turn when Sesshomaru called her back.
“Hello?” She answered, hardly able to contain her excitement.
“You called a moment ago?”he asked. 
 Kagome started chattering away about her day being careful not to spoil her
surprise. “So can I expect you home in time for dinner?” Waiting for his answer
she started to pull off, another car sped past the red light and T-boned her
car, crushing the driver side door on impact. The faint sounds of Sesshomaru
frantically calling out to her could be heard over the phone.
                                   ~*~*~*~*~
Sesshomaru was one of the first to arrive to hospital, his mother-in-law with
Kagome’s grandfather and little brother arrived soon after. The family and
friends sat in the waiting room; anxiously they waited for an update on
Kagome’s condition. Finally, a doctor appeared and announced her condition
being better than what they expected it to be. The accident caused her to lose
the child and due to the amount of blood loss from the hit, she reached a
comatose state. While the relief of knowing she was relatively safe washed over
them, the idea she had a miscarriage, made their heart ache.
Every day, family and friends visited her, telling her about their day and any
major updates in their lives. However, the visits became more infrequent as the
months went on and eventually only her mother made sure to see her. The thought
of seeing Kagome so pale and virtually lifeless, made Sesshomaru too depressed,
no matter how hard he tried to hide it.
                                   ~*~*~*~*~
Mrs. Higurashi stared at her daughter’s seemingly lifeless body and grasped her
hand. The doctors have asked for weeks now whether they should take her off
life support and tomorrow they had to make their decision. Holding her hand
tighter, she felt the stinging of her eyes and the warming of her cheeks, as
tears began to fall down her face. ‘No parent should have to bury their
child,’she repeated to herself in her mind. A soft gentle hand broke her out of
her dreary thoughts. Turning around she noticed it was Izayoi; her smile was
gentle and understanding. She and her husband walked the grief struck mother
out of the room for a little break, while their son spent some time with his
mate.
Sitting next to her, he too grasped her hand and gave it a small kiss. Since
the doctors approached him about removing her life support weeks before, he
sunk into a depression. Sitting there, he started to think back on their lives
together from their first encounter to the last night, they had been discussing
about starting a family. He smiled, the first time in months. “Kagome, if you
can hear me, please come back to me sweetheart. I do not know if I could live
without you. I love you.” Whipping a lone tear from his cheek, he rose from his
seat the longer he stayed the more depressed he became. Just as he turned the
knob to leave her hospital room, he heard a faint whimper. Turning around, he
watched her eyes flitter open. Calling out to his family and the nearby nurses,
they all entered the room to check on Kagome’s improved condition.
 
Chapter 1
 
Kagome was in a realm of existence in her own mind- she was neither awake nor
asleep, alive or dead; in her mind she was there but not at the same time. She
wandered throughout her psyche, for what only seemed like a couple of minutes-
hours at the most.
Every now and then, she would hear the murmurs of familiar voices speak to her,
one voice in particular made her heart ache. That one voice, a man’s, was cold
and seemed to be without emotion but to her trained heart, Kagome could tell he
was in pain. Kagome pondered what it would be like to talk to him- the others
too, but mostly him. From what she could tell he care deeply about her; she
could tell by how he held her hand and kissed it before he left. How she wished
he would kiss her lips the same way. The female voice that seem so caring and
motherly, came see to her everyday, brought a little happiness to her lonely
existence, but it pained her whenever she didn’t hear his voice for a long
period of time.
 “Kagome, if you can hear me, please come back to me sweetheart. I do not know
if I could live without you. I love you.” Drifting in her psyche, she heard his
voice. It sounded more hurt than usual, more depressed and it made her worry.
‘Something is not right. There must be something terribly wrong,’ she thought
and she had a feeling it was about her. With all the energy she could muster,
she willed herself to back to the world she knew she should be a part of.
Opening her eyes she saw an outline of a handsome man, his shoulders were broad
his hair long and the air about him was solemn. Trying to speak, she let out a
little whimper catching his attention. Slowly he turned around in fear of his
imagination was playing tricks on him again; but the fates granted the desire
of his heart him and noticed her eyes were open. “Kagome,” he whispered and
rushed to her side. Small tears formed around his eyes. Sesshomaru called the
nurse in and the next thing he knew, the room filled with both their parents.
Just as the excitement flooded the hospital room, Kagome’s doctor entered and
asked everyone to leave the room so that he may conduct some tests and he would
get back to them as soon as he was done.
                                                                                                                                   
            ~*~*~*~*~
Mrs. Higurashi called her son and father-in-law to the hospital and Sesshomaru
contacted their friends, Miroku and Sango, while his parents called their
youngest son to the come to the hospital announcing that Kagome was awake. Soon
the waiting room filled with anticipation waiting to hear the doctor’s news.
After about forty-five minutes, the doctor walked out of Kagome’s room into the
room filled to the brim with friends and family. He took a seat in front of
Sesshomaru. It became quite as they waited to hear what he had to say.
“Mr. Taisho, I have good news and bad news.”  
“Well,” Sesshomaru demanded, “tell us!”
“Well, Mr. Taisho, the good news is in the accident, she didn’t suffer major
brain injury…”
“But there was some?” Izayoi voiced.
“Yes, that’s the bad news. I asked her a few basic, who she is; her birth year
and who her parents are, but she told me she did not know. While the accident
didn’t, as far as we can see, hinder her speaking or thinking skills, it did
however slightly damage the hippocampus in her temporal lobes.”
 “What does that mean?” Mrs. Higurashi asked next.
“The temporal lobes are right here,” he started pointing to his temples, “right
behind the eyes.  They are in charge of short and long term memory storing,
thought processing and mood stability. Inside the lobe, there is the
hippocampus, this analyzed new information and memorized it. In extremely bad
cases, once the hippocampus is damaged, the brain will never be able to store
new information or retrieve old memories.” Everyone listened intently to the
doctor as he explained what was wrong. “In your wife’s case, Taisho-san,
nothing seems like there is any serious damage- more likely minor bruising. I
would like to run a few more tests on her in order to get definitive results,
and would like to keep her here longer to keep a close eye on her. More good
news is she hasn’t lost feeling in her lower body, I’ll give you a list of
physical therapist to look over so we can get her walking again; since she
hasn’t walked in months, she will need to strengthen those muscles. I may
prescribe some sort of memory-enhancing medication as well as some sort of mood
stabilizing medication, depending on her results. She’s being prepped for that
right now, and you will be able to see her when she comes out.”
The waiting took forever. Miroku and Sango took Souta and his grandfather out
to a little restaurant for some dinner, the Taishos, Touga and Izayoi took Mrs.
Higurashi out as well, to get a small bite to eat and some coffee, only ones
left in the waiting room was Sesshomaru and Inuyasha. Inuyasha wanted to break
the uneasiness he felt being alone with his brother. “Sesshomaru, I’m gonna get
some coffee, would ya like a cup?”
“No, I’m fine.”
“What about a bite to eat? Mom, dad and Mrs. Higurashi have been worried that
you haven’t been eating much since they asked about taking Kagome off life
support.”
“Inuyasha, I know what you’re trying to do but I’m not in the mood right now.”
“Ptff, fine, but the folks’ll kill me I didn’t bring anything back for you. So
what do you want me to get?”
Sesshomaru really wanted to sit in silence as he waited to hear news about his
wife; he also realized that his brother was only trying to help. He sighed,
“Surprise me.”
With that, Inuyasha walked out the hospital and drove off. Just as he left the
parking lot, his phone rang and he connected it with the Bluetooth. “Hello?”
“How is she?”A female voice asked over the phone.
“She’s doing fine. Ya know you come see her.”
“I will when I have time.”
“That’s always your excuse, I know for a fact you’re not that busy, especially
since you became a dance instructor.”
“That’s not completely true; even though, I gave up most of my responsibilities
at the company, I still look over it diligently making sure it is in proper
working order.”
“Ptff, the same ol’ Haru-chan. Hey I’m going out for a quick bite. Are ya too
busy to join me?”
The voice over the phone sighed. “I guess I could get a bite to eat, I am
getting a bit hungry. Where should I meet you?”
“I’ll come get you.”
“No I have to go straight home; I have to get my girls ready for their
competition.”
 “Who says I won’t take you straight home?”
“I know you Inuyasha, and you won’t. Tell you what, I’m still here at the
studio, I’ll meet you at the café not far from there.”
“Deal.” He hung up the phone and before long; he was parking his car and
walking into the café. Inuyasha told his friend the news regarding Kagome’s
condition, as well as other topics. When they were done eating, Inuyasha
grabbed Sesshomaru something before leaving, saying their goodbyes, they went
their separate ways.
~*~*~*~*~
Inuyasha reentered the hospital and handed Sesshomaru his meal. “How much do I
owe you?”
“Don’t worry about it. Were you able to see her?”
He nodded, “I did for a while, her family is in there right now.” Sesshomaru
opened the drink can Inuyasha bought him and started drinking. “Thank you.”
“No problem.”
***** Chapter 2 *****
Chapter 2
 
At almost one in the morning, Sesshomaru drove his car up the driveway and
parked in the garage. It was late, too late for him to be coming home; Kagome
would have chewed him out had she been there- but he only works to take his
mind off the loneliness he felt not having someone to come home to anymore.
Sesshomaru walked through the door of his home and placed his keys where they
belonged. Walking up his stairs to his bedroom, he placed his hand on the back
of his neck and twisted it from one side to the other. The hard soles of his
shoes and the cracks of his neck echoed throughout the halls. Sesshomaru
inwardly sighed at how quite his home became after the incident. Kagome would
sometimes have the radio playing as she cooked, or the television playing in
the background as she did some work at home- the house enveloped her in a
silence and she did not like it. He missed the greetings he would get when he
came home early- she would run to him and jump into his arms. Anyone who would
see that only brushed it off as them still being newlyweds, but even after a
year, she still met him with excitement.
He quietly walked into his room and started to take off his clothes and threw
them on the floor haphazardly, he didn’t care Jaken will pick them up and get
them ready for the cleaners in the morning. Removing the hair tie from his
head, he slowly walked over to the linen closet, and pulled out two fresh
towels and walked into his bathroom to take a nice hot shower. As the water ran
through his hair and his naked form, he imagined all the worries, all the
tension drained away and down the drain along with the water - if only for a
while.
Stepping out of the shower, he dried his hair and his body before slipping into
a pair of sleeping pants. He sat on his side of the bed and thought about his
visit with Kagome earlier in the day. He started smiling. Hearing her voice
again was the best thing that happened to him since her accident. It seems that
the Kamis were listening to his prayers after all.
Reaching over to his side table to turn off his lamp his wedding photo caught
his attention. Out of all the pictures taken that day it was his favorite. He
let a chuckle slip as he remembered what happened. Kagome was in a long white
and lace dress that made her look stunning and her long wavy hair placed in a
bun. The photographer asked for a kiss and when reaching his hand up to cup her
face, he undid the bun making her hair fall perfectly down her shoulders.
Before they knew it, a small gust of wind picked up and blew her hair off her
shoulders. The picture came out really well; well enough in fact, many people
deemed it as their favorite picture also.
 Reaching back over to turn off his lamp he smiled once more before getting
under the covers. Just as his eyes became too heavy to bear, Sesshomaru looked
out the window to his left. The crescent moon gave off a vibrant glow that
night that made him wonder if Kagome was in her hospital room, looking at the
same moon, or thinking of him. As sleep overcame the daiyoukai, a smile reached
his lips the third time that day.
                                   ~*~*~*~*~
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        
Kagome sat in a quiet hospital room, her mind wandering all over the place.
From the moment she woke up, to only a few hours ago, she met many people,
people she supposedly knew. In her comatose state, she heard the voices of the
people that came to visit her, and try as she might her mind refused to
cooperate with her. It refused to allow her to dig within her memory and put a
name to a face.
Kagome’s gaze wandered throughout the hospital room once again. To her right
there were vases full of flowers and balloons and stuffed animals saying “Get
Well Soon”. To her left there was a chair where her mate sat and a big window.
The curtains were wide open so she could see the moon and a few stars out; the
moon was in its crescent form tonight. It was thin like the one on top of the
demon she supposedly mated. Her mind roamed thinking about the day’s events.
Since she woke, Kagome’s head became flooded with thoughts and emotions. They
mostly landed on him and his beautiful face. How she could not remember him she
did not understand. Who would forget a face, or voice, or body, or kindness
like his? Soon she felt her eyes grow heavy from the morphine they gave her for
some of the pain she was feeling. Resting her head on her pillow, she prayed to
the heavens above that they will give her back her memories.
As her eyes drifted closed, Kagome slipped into the darkness she knew all too
well, but it gave her a little comfort to know she will awake in a few hours.
 
                                ~*~*~Dream~*~*~
Kagome was shrouded in darkness, one so thick she could feel it. She tried to
move her limbs but they would not budge. She tied to scream to the top of her
lungs, but not a noise trickled out of her throat. She sat in a panic, a deep
sinister voice echoing around her, chilling her to the bone. Kagome never felt
more terrified in her life. The hard soles of his shoes became louder and
louder as he approached her. “My Kagome, my sweet little Kagome. I hate seeing
you like this, hurting you like this, but you gave me no choice. They say my
dear, ‘Forgive and forget’, but I much rather do neither. How does one forget
breaking someone’s heart like you did? And, for that matter, how do you forgive
the person that caused you that pain…”
“I’m so sorry!” Kagome interrupted, hot tears stinging her face. “I didn’t mean
to hurt you! I thought I was doing the right thing by not try to string you
along anymore! I- ”
The man grabbed her roughly by the cheeks with one hand. The pressure he was
placing on her caused her to cut the inside of her cheeks with her teeth. She
could not see it but he smiled at her pain, a smile that intensified after he
slapped her across her face. Her tears flowed rapidly down her face. He was
basking in her misery, knowing she was in pain made him almost as giddy as a
school boy. He kneeled down before her and removed her blindfold, and her eyes
slowly adjusted to what little light that was around them; when they did, she
witnessed the sheer evil that possessed this man. There, a mere five feet away,
sat Sesshomaru. He was severely beaten, and seemingly unconscious. Sutras
placed around him so his healing powers wouldn’t take effect. You could hear
the strain in his breathing, possibly from damaged lungs. Despite him being a
powerful Daiyoukai, he wouldn’t survive much longer. “Kukuku, look my pet, at
how the mighty hath fallen.” The man stalked passed Sesshomaru and grabbed a
crowbar, returned and started to beat him. Sesshomaru screamed in pure anguish
as he received more another blow from his tormentor. “Oh? What’s the matter,
hum? The big bad mutt can’t take a hit?” The beating continued until Kagome
screamed for him to stop.
“Please, please stop this!” Kagome slumped over where she sat and bawled.
There was a loud clanking noise where the crowbar hit the ground. “Well, my
sweet, I am not without mercy, since you said ‘please’ and everything. Tell you
what, I’ll give you the choice Erik gave Christine and Raoul, you can either:
stop this madness right now and run away with me and I set him freeoryou can
leave this place and send your lover to his early grave.” Removing the gun from
his pants, the man cocked back the hammer and aimed the gun at the nearly dying
man on the floor in front of him. “Choose wisely baby. I can assure you this
story will not have a happy ending either way.”
“Kagome,” Sesshomaru’s cracking voice strained. “Kagome, run away from here,
I’ll be fine.”
“No! I can’t- I won’t leave you!” Kagome screamed back.
“Awww, how precious. You hear that dog? She’s not willing to leave your side.
But I’m fine with that. This means I can kill you now!” As soon as those words
left his lips, the gun went off. Kagome closed her eyes and screamed.
                                ~*~*~Dream~*~*~
Kagome screamed and thrashed against the hospital bed. Nurses rushed in to
subdue her, giving her a sedative to calm her down.
***** Chapter 3 *****
Chapter 3
Kagome sat up in her hospital bed, looking out the same window from the night
before; the sun barely peaking from behind the skyline. Nurses told her they
called her husband and he would be on his way soon. The dreams she had
terrified her to tears. She wiped one away from her cheek when a nurse escorted
Sesshomaru into the room and closed the door behind her. Kagome turned her head
toward the door when she heard the sound of his voice and noted the worry and
exhaustion on his face.
“Good morning Kagome,” he started. He was told by staff they had to sedate her
earlier that morning, and since then Kagome hadn’t talked to anyone. From the
front desk to her room, he wondered how he would approach her.  He sat down
next to her bed, acting a little too cautious. “I called your mother; she said
she’ll be here soon.”
Kagome eyed him and turned her head back to the window. “You were shot. In my
dream you got shot,” was all she said. Silence passed for a few moments before
she continued. “I dreamed I was in a dark room and this man was abusing me and
beating you. You almost died from it. He then gave me a choice of staying with
him or running away, either way you would have died. When I said I wouldn’t
leave you, he shot you.”
“It was only a dream,” he assured her.
“Yea…” was the only thing she said. A knock on the door interrupted Sesshomaru
before he could say anything else. On the other side of the door was a nurse,
asking for entrance into the room to feed and bathe her. Moments after eating,
Sesshomaru was escorted out of the room so that the nurses may clean her up.
Waiting in the hallway, he met the panicked Mrs. Higurashi.  
                                   ~*~*~*~*~
Mrs. Higurashi ran into the hospital; her hair uncombed, worry etched over her
face. She stopped in front of her daughter’s room door, only to be stopped by
her son-in-law coming out of the room. Before she could speak, Sesshomaru
seemed to have answered every one of her questions that ran though her mind
since she received his phone call earlier that morning.
“She’s fine. They said she woke up thrashing but they sedated her.” Mrs.
Higurashi released a breath she didn’t realize she was holding.
“Did they say why she was having a fit?”
Sesshomaru shook his head. “She had just calmed down when I arrived and before
they could start asking her questions.” She became rigid again. “Right now they
are cleaning her up. I’ll say good-bye, but I’ll be back; I need to handle some
things at the office.” Mrs. Higurashi nodded and sat down with Sesshomaru,
waiting to go in and see about her daughter.  
Time that passed in the waiting room wasn’t long and Sesshomaru kissed his wife
and left. The whole day, Mrs. Higurashi sat by her daughter’s side, knitting or
reading, talking to her, or trying to make her as comfortable as she could.
Earlier that afternoon, Mrs. Higurashi gave her one of her favorite books from
her childhood, Alice in Wonderland. Half way through the book, Kagome came upon
a picture of three girls in middle school they had on a white and green sailor
fuku and were bending over at the waist. In the back she saw a bunch of
classmates and students eating lunch in a class room. One girl she knew was
her, her hair was about where it was now, she was on one end holding up a peace
sign with one hand and the other wrapped around the waist of one girl; the
other was the young lady she met before, Sango who was in the middle, her long
straight hair was put up in a high ponytail, her arms were around the waist of
Kagome and the other young lady, with a big smile on her face. The final one,
the girl on the other end, she couldn’t remember her, but she felt a certain
connection to her; her hair was curly and reddish brown, her skin was a light
caramel color, she had one arm around Sango’s waist  and the in a peace sign as
well, she winked into the camera and smirked.  “Mrs. – Mom?” Kagome started,
correcting herself. “Who is that?” She asked turning over as much as she could
to show her mother the picture.
Her mother smiled a small smile looking at the picture, “That’s Harumi; she’s a
close friend of yours, at least she was, she even gave you that book for you
birthday. The two of you haven’t talked much in the past few years. She blames
herself for what happened.” Kagome had a puzzled look on her face, and then her
mother answered the question that had been on her mind. “There was an incident
years ago. It caused a lot of pain for everyone. You should rest before your
dinner arrives.”  She said, stopping her from asking anymore questions. Kissing
her on the forehead, Mrs. Higurashi left the room.
Dinner time came and went, and Kagome was almost done with her book when Sango
entered the room alone. “Hello Kagome, how are you feeling?”
Kagome looked up from the book in her lap to see the young woman. “I’m doing
fine.” Kagome sat up a little straighter in her bed, “S-Sango, we are friends
right?”
Sango looked at her with a puzzled expression; “Yes …” she trailed off.
“And being my friend, I can trust you to answer any questions I may have
right?”
“Yes, I will do everything in my power to answer any questions you may have to
the best of my ability.” Sango sat in the chair that was once occupied by her
mother earlier that day.
Kagome picked up the picture she found earlier tucked under her tray, and
handed it to her. “Do you remember this girl?”
Sango took the picture form Kagome and started to smile a sad smile. “Of course
I remember her! The three of us used to be like the Three Musketeers! We were
always together until she was accepted into that ritzy privet school in our
final year of middle school.”
“What privet school?”
“There’s a privet school outside of Tokyo – I can never remember its name –
it’s where she met Inuyasha and Sesshomaru. In those four years we still kept
in touch during holidays and some weekends. We eventually went to university
together.”
“What is she doing now?”
Sango shrugged, “Kami knows. After the incident none of us have talked to her
much. You asked her to be a bride’s maid, and when she declined, you still
invited her to the wedding, but she never showed up. She sent you two a gift
though.” She quickly added. “It was beautiful, silver with rhinestones -”
“ – Why didn’t she attend?”
Sango shrugged again. “We’ve all been asking the same thing for a few years
now. Our most popular theory was that she felt guilty about what happened to
you.”
“What do you mean? What happened?”
She sighed, “Kags, I know I promised you I’d tell you everything, but I can’t
tell you that – “
“ – But why – “
Sango raised her hand to stop her. “– because we all swore, me, Miroku,
Sesshomaru, your family, and his that we would refrain from ever mentioning
what happened again. Everything that happened was too painful. Trust me; it’s
for the best that you don’t know.” Sango returned the picture to her. “So on a
lighter note, what has the doctor said about getting you walking again?”
Kagome took the photo back and crossed her arms, and stared straight ahead. “He
said he’d be able to find out something within a few days, and my chances of my
ability to walk again are high.” Her voice was cold and bitter sounding.
“Kagome are you mad at me?”
“No.”
“You said that far too quickly for it to be truthful. You forget I’m one of the
few people who know you better than you know yourself. So please tell me, why
you are upset.”
“If you know me so well, you should know why! I have this whole life I don’t
remember living, with a best friend that doesn’t want to talk to me and some
sort of devastatingly tragic event that no one wants to tell me about.”
Sango reached out to grasp her friend’s hand. “I vowed, I would never speak
about what happened years ago, but I will tell you this: It scared us, you most
of all. There were nights you woke up terrified, screaming in your sleep; there
were days that were so horrifying, you rarely left your house. People we were
associated with would turn up missing, or worse, all because of some
psychopath. When it was over, you begged for your memories to be whipped away,
in order to live the rest of your life in peace, to be able to live happily
with Sesshomaru. So please, drop this. Focus on getting better … I’ve gotta go,
it’s my turn to cook dinner. I just wanted to stop by and see how you were
feeling.” As she turned around to leave, she was met with Sesshomaru at the
door, a sad expression on her face. She placed a hand on his shoulder as she
exited, saying her farewells.
That night, Sesshomaru decided to sleep in the room with her, in case she threw
another fit. The nurses administered a pain medication – when she started to
complain about her lower back was hurting - in her IV that caused her to fall
asleep almost instantly.
                                ~*~*~Dream~*~*~
Kagome drove carefully on the roads, her headlights being her only source of
visibility on the moonless night. More than an hour ago, she received a phone
call to meet her brother in an abandoned building about ten miles outside of
Tokyo. Kagome reached for her phone and checked for a signal again – nothing,
not since a quarter of a mile back. Kagome was getting even more nervous. For a
few months now, her ex has been stalking her and threatening her and her family
and friends. Lately, she received ominous phone calls, and letters in the mail
containing body parts. The phone call she received earlier was from brother,
Souta, but it didn’t sound like him. It sounded like him, but something was off
about it and she didn’t know what; whatever the reason, she was told to go
alone and to not tell anyone where she was going, otherwise someone would hurt
him. Fear was slowly encasing her in its web and the thought of her brother
getting injured because of her. Not realizing it, Kagome came to a stop in
front of a condemned building with a no trespassing sign attached to a tall
wooden fence. Leaving the headlights of her SUV on, Kagome jumped out and
surveyed the area; there were with mounds of dirt to left and construction
equipment to the right and a foul stench all round. Walking around, looking for
a way inside, the only sounds she could hear was her own footsteps in the
gravel and her voice calling out for her brother. Suddenly she heard a noise to
her right where she saw an opening. Running to where she heard the noise,
Kagome came to a halt when she saw a shadow emerging from the building.
Souta, walked from out of the shadows with a sinister smile on his face. “Hey
Sis, long time no see.”
“Souta, it’s you!” She said running toward him. Her pace lessened when he
didn’t look as happy to see her as she was to see him; his smile remained. 
“Souta, what’s wrong? And why are you in a place like this? I thought something
bad happened to you! Come on, let’s go home!” She went to grab his arm and
tugged him in the direction from where she came. She heard a laugh, one that
was not like her brother’s. She heard it before, and it didn’t clam the fear
she had since her journey started. The wrist she held onto felt odd as the
bones and flesh morphed into another’s and grabbed onto hers, stopping her in
her attempt to leave the site. Slowly Kagome turned around and the color
drained from her face. There before her was her ex-fiancé, the man that was the
source of all her and her loved ones’ fears. “How…?”
He brought her in close, his lips to her ears, the smile on his face never
wavering. “Let’s just say I made a deal with the Devil.” She tried to struggle,
but her his grip on her only got stronger. Before she could scream, he covered
her face and blacked out.
                                ~*~*~Dream~*~*~
Her heavy breathing woke Sesshomaru up, and he rushed to her side. He held onto
her as he tried to calm his wide-eyed mate down. “Kagome, everything is
alright! It’s ok, I’m here, and nothing will hurt you.”
***** Chapter 4 *****
Kagome’s eyes fluttered as she tried to focus them; her body shaking and a cold
sweat washed over her. She heard the soft, soothing voice of her husband
telling her to that everything will be ok. Her heart rate slowed back down to
normal; the heart rate-monitor to her side stopped beeping. He stroked her hand
with his thumb, its repetitive motions calming her rattled nerves. Finally
getting the strength to speak, Kagome answered the question that was never
asked. “I had another dream, err nightmare. This time I was driving down this
secluded road, and I came across this abandoned building. When I got out, I
went to look for this kid – my brother – I found him, but it wasn't him. Before
my eyes, he morphed into another person…” Kagome stopped by the sudden rise
from the seat next to her. “Sesshomaru, I know everyone is hiding something.
What happened all those years ago?”
 “Kagome, it is not in your best interest for you-”
“Sesshomaru, do not tell me what is in my best interest. There is a secret
everyone is keeping from me and I demand to know what it is!”
“Kagome, we aren’t telling you for your own good. The lot of us swore we would
never mention what happened.”
“Sesshomaru, I don’t remember anything about me, you, my family, or our
friends. For all I know, everything could be a lie. I want to believe you and
everything you say, but it feels like I can’t. There’s this huge mystery that
is looming over me. Every time I go and reach for it someone snatches it away
from me.” Her delicate hands cover her face in frustration. Kagome sighs before
continuing. “I’m trying so hard to trust everything you say.  I feel like we
have this connection to each other that I can’t explain. Yet, I have these …
doubts. And until you tell me what are you trying to ‘protect’ me from,
those doubts won’t leave.”
 “Kagome, what do you want me to do?”
“Tell me the truth.”
It took Sesshomaru a while before he answered. He knew she was right, and he
knew sooner or later she would find out the truth. Today was not the day; she
couldn't know the truth, not everything anyway. Sesshomaru told her that she
dated a guy back in college, that they were going to get married. But, when she
broke it off with him weeks before the wedding, he didn’t take it well. He
became depressed and tried everything he could to get her back. Sesshomaru
refused to get into the gory details. He told her the man tried to ruin her
life and the lives of those around her. There were people who were able to stop
him before it went too far and that he will never bother anyone ever again.
Sort of satisfied with his answer, Kagome gave him a soft smile and thanked him
for telling her. Sesshomaru walked over to her and placed a kiss on her cheek.
“Get some rest now.”  He waited until she was asleep before tip-toing out of
the door.
~*~*~*~*~
The grip Sesshomaru had on his steering wheel turned his knuckles white. He
endeavored for hours to calm the seething rage inside him, but he could no
longer contain himself. His work was not enough to placate him. Trees,
buildings, cars and pedestrians all blurred together, a combination of haste
and ire. Many thoughts raced through his head; every other was a fleeting
thought was how he had not yet been pulled over. So many negative emotions
bubbled and burst within him. Sooner than he anticipated, he arrived at his
destination, a dance studio. There were parents and their little girls leaving
the studio on this Saturday afternoon. After parking and getting out of his
car, Sesshomaru strode inside the building.
He spots his target. Dressed like the children she's surrounded by, wearing a
black leotard and tights. Her arms covered by a light pink wrap, shielding her
caramel colored skin from the chill of early winter. Her hair, dark auburn, is
in a tight bun. She sat in a nearby chair putting on legwarmers while
discussing something with parents. Their girls stroll over to them beaming with
confidence at their praise.  The young woman was unaware of the set of molten
gold eyes staring at her. Before she could finish her sentence, the name
“Honda!” bellowed out along with a sudden jerk of her person to another
direction. His hand firm around her arm, the parents she was speaking to coming
to her aid. Removing herself from his grip, she dismissed the rest of the
parents and students. She watched and waited until all the families left and
she was alone reassuring them of her safety as they left. Her eyes that only a
few moments before held warmth and gentleness, turned cold and threatening. “If
you ever get the inclination to burst in here like that again, I’ll make sure
you regret it. Now what on earth is so important, you had to come in here and
act like a fool?” She asked walking around the studio, picking up trash and
looking for things to place in the lost and found.
“You lied to me Harumi.”
“Excuse me?”
“You lied to me about erasing her memories.” His accusation made Harumi stop
and think about what he was talking about. When it came to her, she just
scoffed and told him he was acting ludicrous, and he needed to leave. Trying to
walk away from him, he grabs her by her arm again. “Don’t try and walk away
from me. You did not do what you said you did!”
Harumi removed herself from his grip again. “I did exactly what I said I was
going to do. You didn’t listen. I will tell you the same thing I said years
ago: The mind doesn’t work that way you think it does. Memories cannot be
erased, only altered or repressed.”
“Whatever the case, you did not do it right! They are coming back … in her
dreams.”
Harumi stood stock-still, her mind flashing back to what happened to
Kagome. The paranoia would creep up on her while she was alone. Her body would
flood with adrenaline, stuck on high alert as if she were about to have the
fight of her life. She wasn’t surprised that most of the people that involved
had post-traumatic stress disorder, but no one worse than her. And it was
Kagome who asked to have her memories repressed. The pain made it hard for her
to have any semblance of happiness with Sesshomaru. How many times she was so
terrified of her own shadow, to the point she thought death was the only way
out of this hell. A month or so after the incident was over, Harumi found a way
to repress Kagome’s memories. This was the last they saw each other.
 “I did what I she asked me to do. If her memories are coming back, then that
is not my problem. Now, if you don’t mind, I need to get ready for my next
class.” She jumped at the slamming of her door.
 
~*~*~*~*~
It has been a total of two weeks since Harumi looked Sesshomaru dead in his
eyes and told him that  Kagome’s memories was not her’s to deal with. With
great effort, Sesshomaru worked hard to ignore her words and focus on the
information the doctor was telling him. Two days before, Kagome and Sesshomaru
were informed that Kagome would be authorized to start physical therapy in a
day. If she seems fine enough to be discharged from the hospital, she’ll have
stay at home nurse, Kagura. She’ll be there until Kagome could regain mobility
of her legs. Until then, she was wheelchair bound.
Within hours, her family was able to pull together an impromptu “Welcome Home”
party at their home. The family room was filled to bursting point with the
people. Everyone was there; her family - Mrs. Higurashi, Souta, and her
grandfather. Other guests included Sango and Miroku, some other friends that
visited her in the hospital including Rin, Jakotsu, and Shippou. Even some of
her former coworkers and neighbors decided to attend. Sesshomaru’s family was
there as well, everyone but Inuyasha. He was running late, as usual.
The guests greeted Kagome with fervor. Bombarding her with gratefulness that
she is alive and well and walking soon. A small smile etched her face as her
guests greeted her, when suddenly the aura in the room grew uneasy as Inuyasha
walked through the door with none other than Harumi. As they approached the
group, Sango blocked their way to Kagome. “What are you doing here Harumi?”
Sango asked with as much malice she could muster.
“Inuyasha invited me. He told me that Kagome was back at home, that there was a
party.”
Sango rolled her eyes and scoffed, “You haven’t seen her in years, why now do
you suddenly care about her well-being?”
Harumi was taken aback from the sudden implication from the woman she thought
was one of her closets if not best friends. “I’ve always cared -”
“Says the girl who never even showed up to visit her in the hospital,” she said
cutting her off.
“Well, the thing about owning a hospital is you don’t have to follow all the
rules; including the one that says guests must sign in and at what times I
could visit her. I was there a few weeks ago; I was reading Alice in Wonderland
to her while she was still in her coma. I usually left before anyone saw me.”
“You know it’s just like you to show up when it is the most convenient for
you.”
“Why are you so upset with me? You know what no; I don’t need your shit. I came
to say ‘hello’, and now that I have, I’m leaving.” Scoffing, Harumi looked over
Sango’s shoulder and told Kagome that she was glad that she was looking well
and that she hoped she’d get well soon so that they may go out together.
Turning to walk out the door Inuyasha followed after her trying to get her to
calm down, but before he could Harumi turned to him, “I knew this was a bad
idea. I told you I shouldn’t have come!” Inuyasha grabbed her arm, stopping her
in her tracks and as her how she was going to get home. “I’m taking an Uber.”
 Harumi removed herself from his grip and walked out the door. Walking down the
driveway while digging for her phone, she heard it ring. Checking the caller ID
“Unknown” and “Blocked number” showed up on her screen. Canceling the call she
dialed for a ride and waited in the chilly winter air.
~*~*~*~*~
Red eyes gazed upon the image of the woman as she wade the cold for a ride
home. His large hands delicately grasped the glass of scotch while placing the
phone down on the table. He smirked sinisterly as he took a sip. His plan was
slowly being put in to place.
~*~*~*~*~
Inuyasha walked back into the room and shot Sango a look that asked silently,
‘What was that for?’
“What? Are we just going to forget she practically abandoned her so-called best
friend when she needed her the most?”
It was Mrs. Higurashi who spoke up then, “Sango, my dear, you have to remember
that was a difficult time for a lot of people and everyone heals in their own
way…”
 “Oh and we are just going to continue to coddle her?!”
“No one is coddling her!” Inuyasha spoke up next.
The bickering amongst her guests became more than Kagome could handle, taking
it upon herself she started to wheel herself out of the room. When asked where
she was going, she stopped allowing Kagura to wheel her away, and simply said
‘bed’.  
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