Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/10315367.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      Multi
  Fandom:
      How_to_Train_Your_Dragon_-_Fandom
  Relationship:
      Dagur_the_Deranged/Hiccup_Horrendous_Haddock_III, Alvin_the_Treacherous/
      Dagur_the_Deranged, Oswald_the_Agreeable/Dagur_the_Deranged, Viggo
      Grimborn/Dagur_the_Deranged
  Character:
      Dagur_the_Deranged, Hiccup_Horrendous_Haddock_III, Alvin_the_Treacherous,
      Oswald_the_Agreeable, Viggo_Grimborn, Tuffnut_Thorston, Ruffnut_Thorston,
      Snotlout_Jorgenson, Astrid_Hofferson, Fishlegs_Ingerman, Hookfang, Barf
      and_Belch, Stormfly, Meatlug, Shattermaster, Stoick_the_Vast,
      Skullcrusher, Gobber_the_Belch
  Additional Tags:
      Dagur-Centric, Hurt/Comfort, Protective_Hiccup_Horrendous_Haddock_III,
      Hurt_Dagur, Past_Child_Abuse, Sexual_Abuse, Mental_Disintegration,
      Unstable_Dagur, Alvin_Comes_Back_For_Dagur, Good_Dagur, But_It_Wont_Last
      Long_If_Hiccup_Cant_Help_Him
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-03-21 Chapters: 2/? Words: 6591
****** My Demons ******
by snotlout
Summary
     Dagur aims for the back. He doesn't anticipate his target turning to
     face him again.
Notes
     eh, i did my best
     let me know if you like it >.>
***** The First Of Many *****
It had been a long day. Dagur was more than ready to get to sleep. He lay in
his bed, shifting in a desperate attempt to find a comfortable spot. He was
merely thirteen, but that didn't stop his father from punishing him severely.
Dagur kicked himself for letting that dragon go. He should have killed it when
he had the chance. There was nothing to do now. All he could even imagine doing
was laying in a spot where the whip lashes on his back weren't threatening to
have him in tears.
Green eyes pierced the cieling as he thought. He couldn't wait to go see
Hiccup, Berk's next heir. They were due to visit in about a week. The smaller
boy was surprisingly intelligent and... Gods, shall he think it? Nice. Yes,
Hiccup was nice. Nice to Dagur. Dagur had a friend. Nice Dagur friend. Friend
of Dagur. A small smile found his lips. He wiggled his hand out of his blanket
to push a few loose strands of blazing hair out of his face. A while ago, he
had learned that sleeping with lashings and a tight braid just amounted to way
more misery than needed. Dagur squeezed his pillow to himself as he thought of
Hiccup. A smaller boy, he was. It made Dagur feel safe, knowing that he could
easily overpower the other. He doubted he would ever need to. Hiccup was his
friend. His brother. He'd never do anything to make Dagur that angry. Hiccup
never yelled at him when he did wrong. He never whipped him- in fact- he's
never hurt him. Dagur was nice enough to him as well. Sure he got a little
rough with the nine year old, but it never got serious. This was all soon to
change, though. Why, it would change tonight.
Just as Dagur's eyes got heavy, and a heady mist settled over his mind, a creak
filled the tall room. Dagur blinked heavily, thinking nothing of the noise, and
simply wiggled a bit to get more comfortable. Hiccup's freckled face and forest
green eyes filled his mind. His only friend was what he thought of this night.
Dagur's dying candle was blocked by a large, shifting form. He frowned, and
turned his head to see who or what was approaching him. The frown deepened when
he recognized his father's form through blurry eyes. "Father?" That frown
turned into a look of slight fear as Oswald came closer. Oswald wasn't very
tall, but at thirteen, neither was Dagur. The big man grunted, climbing onto
the bed and snatching Dagur's legs. "Dad? It's not time to get up so- Go away?
Now? Dad, let go!" Dagur gasped as Oswald man handled him further onto his
burning back, by his legs. "Stop! What the Thor-" Three thick fingers in his
mouth nearly had him gagging. "I'll teach you to disrespect me." His father's
voice was cold, and empty.
Dagur shook his head, attempting to spit the fingers out. He was drooling in
his efforts. "Yes, get them nice and wet. You're lucky I'm even allowing this."
Dagur's eyes widened when Oswald's other hand began to tug at his pants. He
nearly disposed of Oswald's fingers with a quick chomp, but was caught off
guard when instead of yanking them out, Oswald shoved them deeper. His empty
stomach heaved violently. That night, he had perfected a new kind of war cry,
with Oswald leaning over him. His bedframe cried with him as he struggled for a
grip on anything real. He had to be dreaming. No. The pain said otherwise. At
least the thought of Hiccup stayed with him, unlike his consciousness. Maybe it
was a good thing Oswald had whipped him so hard that day. The pain took him to
a merciful faint halfway through Oswald's new favorite pass time.
As soon as he closed his eyes, they were open again. He sat up with a start,
screaming in horror and disgust. No. No, no, no. Sweat coated his muscled body,
red hair sticky and damp. Dagur threw his blanket off, not noticing the ruckus
outside his door. He nearly fell off his bed, weeping. He was oblivious to his
name being called over and over again for what seemed like hours. Yet, hardly
seconds had passed since he stumbled back against a wall. His mind finally
recognized the cries from the other side of his door.
"Dagur!? Are you alright!? Whats going on!?"
Oh thank the Gods, it was Hiccup. He desperately needed him now. The horrible
feeling only worsened when he realized he couldn't need him right now. He
looked to the door, wincing and whimpering as flashes of that life changing
moment flitted across his mind. When he finally found his voice, it was uneven
and hurt.
"Yeah, I'm fine, nothing to worry about! Ha- J-Just some uh... Bedbugs!" He
panted violently, chest heaving.
"Oh! Well... We can look into it later today. Its pretty early, but the sun
will be up soon."
Dagur nodded frantically, forgetting that Hiccup couldn't see him. "Sounds like
a plan, brother!" He was doing everything in his power to stop the tears in his
eyes and voice.
As Hiccup's footfalls faded, his pants turned into pained gasps as he sank to
the floor.
. . . . . . . . . .
"Ah! Dagur, we've been waiting for you!" Fishlegs nodded excitedly, looking
from Dagur to Hiccup. "I took care of Shattermaster for you!"
"Oh! Thank you, Dagur!" A toothy grin replaced his former frown. That frown
quickly returned once he registered Fishlegs' shocked face and Hiccup's raised
eyebrow. The wider boy giggled, scratching the back of his head. "What? Was it
something I said?" Fishlegs snorted, rocking back on his heels. "You said- uh-
thank you, Dagur."
"Oh- Ugh. Sorry, Fishlegs. Urgh, bad Dagur." Dagur thumped himself on the head.
He hit himself a little harder than he had meant to, and shook his head in an
effort to shake the ache. After a moment, he shrugged, offering Fishlegs an
awkward grin.
Hiccup's voice made him jump. "Dagur, want to go check for bed bugs, now?" Oh
no. That grin grew into a nearly painfully awkward ear to ear smile. "You know
I do!" He pushed out a few helpless cackles. Hiccup gave him a small smile, and
walked with him back to his hut. Ugh, they were going to search for nonexistent
bed bugs and Dagur was terrified that he'd have to explain what actually
happened. As they walked, he threw an arm around Hiccup's shoulder, eager for
the touch, even if it wasn't reciprocated. He really wished Hiccup would just
hug him back, put an arm around his shoulder. Why wouldn't Hiccup do that for
him? Just one hug, he needed it so bad.
"Did you like me when you were nine?" He raised his eyebrows, awaiting his
answer with sickening dread. Dagur hadn't been the same Dagur eight year old
Hiccup knew.
"Uhh... You were thirteen then, right?"
"Yeah-hmm."
"Well- er- its hard to say, Dagur. You changed a lot when you were thirteen.
Maybe it was just because you realized you were a teen but... I don't know. You
were obsessed with me and you were really uh... How to put this... Uptight, in
a weird way? I always thought you were just trying to act tough. Did you like
me?"
Dagur looked down, then away, letting his arm fall back to his side. "Yeah. I
did... You were nice to me and... Yeah." He shrugged and quickly slipped into
his dark hut.
Hiccup frowned as he followed the older man into his hut. "So... Bed bugs,
huh?"
"I don't know. I was sleeping and I felt something climb into my bed." He
clenched his jaw as he pulled the cover away from his bed.
"You felt a bug climb into your bed?" There was the doubt. Dagur produced a
frightened smile.
"Uh- I guess not? I might have just been dreaming. Urgh, I don't like bugs they
make me go blegh!" Hopefully that was enough to stave Hiccup's curiousity. He
watched the other boy check beneath the bed, inspecting the woodwork. Dagur
felt a childish relief wash over him as Hiccup checked for monsters beneath his
bed. No! Not monsters. Bugs.
Hiccup scratched his head as he stood up again, shrugging to Dagur. "Must have
been a bad dream." He had only seen Dagur have a bad dream once. Then again, he
had really only seen Dagur sleep once. No wonder the other boy had such dark
circles around his eyes.
"Yeah. Sorry to bother you, brother."
"Its alright."
Tuffnut's horned figure peered inside from the doorway. "Oh! Hey Dags. This is
your hut. Explains why you sneak in here every night. Ha!" He strode away just
like that.
Dagur and Hiccup looked to eachother, both with an eyebrow raised.
The rest of that day was filled with simple chores and many games of Maces and
Talons. It went rather smoothly, and Dagur was thankful.
. . . . . . . . . .
It was time for bed, and Dagur laughed with the twins as they walked him to his
hut.
Tuffnut looked dramatically to the setting sun, placing a fist against his
chest. His other hand waved towards the dying light. "The day is gone!"
Dagur raised a brow. "Not yet."
Tuffnut stared at the last rays of the sun, for what seemed like forever. Dagur
didn't know why he stood there with him so long. Ruffnut mirrored her brother's
expression. Once the sun disappeared beneath the sea, they both hollered, "The
day is gone!"
Dagur rolled his eyes. "Goodnight Tuffnut, Ruffnut." Tuffnut never went to bed
without a hug first. Dagur couldn't put into words how thankful he was for
those nightly hugs. He nearly crushed the other boy as they embraced. Tuffnut
wheezed happily. "Goodnight, Dag Man." Ruffnut waved as they walked away.
Dagur entered his hut, looking to his bed with dread. Sleep was important here
on the edge. So, he reluctantly slipped under the covers. He pulled them up to
his chin, staring at the ceiling. The creaking of his hut had him tensing
uncomfortably. The occasional creaks pierced his heart, planting fear into him.
He didn't relax until his body began to ache. Dagur took a few deep breaths,
before closing his eyes.
It wasn't long before he fell asleep. He dearly wished he'd never sleep again.
He shifted uncomfortably, groaning as sharp rock dug into his sides. The rocks
bothered him less than the frigid coldness of the slab beneath him. Nineteen
years old, and already in prison. This wasn't just any old prison. It was
Alvin's prison. A dark, filthy place. That wasn't the worst part. Alvin wanted
revenge. He figured it was best served in multiple courses. The sound of
Alvin's telltale, heavy footsteps had him raising his head. He bared his teeth.
"Hey there, Alvin." Alvin chuckled as he approached the bars of his cage.
"Hello, Dagur. It's awfully boring here, isn't it." The man's nasty grin forced
Dagur to scooch away a bit. "Yeah, so go find something to do." Dagur scoffed,
sneering at Alvin.
"Maybe I will." Dagur frowned and sat up as Alvin opened his cell and entered.
The boy lept to his feet. He was too late, as Alvin slammed the door shut. A
guard locked it. Fear and realization slowly replaced Dagur's determined
expression.
Dagur's helmet fell into his eyes as he back up, the horns catching on the low
ceiling at the back of his cell. He quickly pulled it back into place, jumping
to the side as Alvin approached. "There's nowhere to run, boy!" The huge man
cackled. Dagur refused to accept this. He tossed his helmet to the floor, his
cap going with it. The two things clattered at Alvin's feet. They didn't trip
him as Dagur had hoped.
"Get away! Get back!" Dagur scrambled to get away, back against the dark wall.
Alvin chuckled darkly. "You took my island, tricked me, foiled my plans, stole
my Skrill, and got me stuck here, babysitting you. I deserve to have some fun
with ya."
"Just be happy with the whippings, old man. You're lucky I even allow that." As
if he had a say. Dagur slid along the bars of the cell. He yelped when hands
slipped through the gaps, holding him back against the wall. He screamed in
anger, thrashing as they pinned him down. "Get your filthy hands off of me!
AAAGH! Let me go!"
Another dark chuckle from Alvin as his huge silhouette approached him. "Hold
him still. I'm gonna teach this boy a lesson." Dagur's nineteen year old form
shook violently, chest heaving in his panic. "Back off!" The strength left his
voice, raw terror replacing it. "No, no! Don't do that- Don't do this to me!"
He cried, turning his head away from the man and his gripping hands. Why was
this happening again? Did this happen to everyone? Or just him? All that can be
said is, he's never felt more alone with so many hands roaming where they
didn't belong.
Dagur awoke with a choking gasp, drenched in sweat. Again. At least he hadn't
screamed. He whimpered, gasping for air as he kicked his blanket away. His face
twisted as he fought the tears he knew were coming. He pulled his knees up to
his chest, hugging them close. Why were these memories haunting him now? It
wasn't even a full minute later until he broke. He sobbed into his shaking
knees. Where was Hiccup? Hiccup could just make it alright. No. It was too
late. Hiccup wouldn't understand, nor would he comfort him. At least thats what
he thought. He wished he could take it back. Take everything back. On that
night, and many other nights in that prison, he screamed such things. He had
shared what was supposed to be an intimate event with two people by the time he
was nineteen. Those two people had no regards for him. They were merciless. He
was told by his peers the wonders of sex. There was no wonder in sex. For
Dagur, sex was pain. A pain that haunted him every second of every day.
He didn't lose conciousness once in all three years there. He endured every
visit, with a brother in mind. Hiccup was the only thing he had to hold onto.
Every time Alvin visited, his tunic tore a bit more. Dagur thanked the Gods
that he had left the buckle untouched. It made him think of Hiccup. It reminded
him of the last time he saw the boy. The Skrill etched into the metal brought
back many memories of the boy.
. . . . . . . . . .
That morning, Dagur had left his hut early to bathe Shattermaster. He hoped
that in doing so, he'd scrub the nightmares from his mind.
"Dagur, could you and Shattermaster move that stupid boulder out of my
doorway!?" Snotlout's shrill voice pierced the hazy vale of Dagur's thoughts.
He blinked a few times, hand idly scrubbing away at Shattermaster's tough skin.
The dragon's tongue lulled out, eyes rolling happily. Dagur dared to peek
towards Snotlout's hut. Both eyebrows raised. He was about to ask how it got
there when Snotlout continued.
"Ruffnut and Tuffnut are going to pay! No one locks Snotlout out of his home! I
tried to move it myself, but Hookfang won't help!"
"Yeah, I'll get it for you." Dagur shrugged nonchalantly, and tossed the soapy
brush back into the bucket beside his feet. "Come on, Shattermaster. Oh, yeah?
You're a good, clean boy, yes you are! Daddy thinks you smell good, mmhmm!" He
cackled when Shattermaster jumped to nuzzle his hand, nearly knocking him over.
"Some time today, please?" Snotlout grumped, a hand on his hip.
Dagur looked at him, blinking a few times. How dare he? The second he
recognized the pressure in his head, he closed his eyes, taking a deep,
cleansing breath. Once he released it, he silently hopped onto Shattermaster's
back and guided him towards Snotlout's hut. He shook his head at the giant
boulder planted before the hut's entrance. A face somewhat resembling
Snotlout's angry face was painted across its surface.
"Alright, Shattermaster, lets show this boulder who's boss!" With Snotlout's
face painted across it, he couldn't help but substitute the boy with it.
Shattermaster panted with joy as he buzzed closer, gripping the rock in a great
big bear hug. He pulled it away from the door, wings working double time to
keep them all in the air. "Here, lets go drop it somewhere. Maybe you can eat
it if it breaks, hows that sound, boy?" Shattermaster snorted and grumbled in
excitement, blinking rapidly. Dagur pointed the dragon to a nearby gorge,
patting his shoulder as he dropped the boulder inside of it. As expected, and
hoped for, the rock shattered at the bottom.
"Bon appétit!"
Dagur sighed as his dragon sat them down next to the crushed boulder, chompig
away. He hopped off and got to climbing the sides of the gorge. Shattermaster
looked up, pieces of the boulder tumbling from his mouth. "Its okay, boy! Enjoy
your food, Daddy will see you later!" The green Gronckle shook with joy,
returning to his food.
Dagur gasped, choking on his own scream when he was conftronted with the sudden
sight of black claws at the top of the cliff edge. He nearly let go.
"Woah! Dagur!" Hiccup snatched the older boy's hand, tugging him up to his
feet. "Its just Toothless." He chuckled, gesturing to the toothless Night Fury.
"Woo! Scared me." Dagur smiled, patting the dust from his tunic. He glanced up,
brow furrowing at the face Hiccup was making. He looked worried. "Is something
wrong, brother?"
"Dagur- You seem a little off today."
"Really? I don't feel off."
"Yeah, well, Berserkers are known to lie about how they feel."
At that, Dagur stiffened, looking to Hiccup. It was like staring at a brick
wall. Hiccup was steadfast in whatever conclusion he had made.
"Dagur, whats going on?"
Dagur sputtered, forcing a laugh. "What do you mean by that?" Stupid question.
Hiccup folded his arms, giving Dagur a look that could crush any resolve. Well,
not Dagur's. That was just for the sake of comparison- er-
Dagur let his shoulders slump, giving Hiccup a very lazy but exasperated look
in return. "I'm good." He attempted to walk away, rolling his shoulders
uncomfortably. Something about a Hiccup with a not happy emotion going on
behind him unsettled him. Too bad it would look suspicious if he walked away
backwards.
"Da-agur." There was that drawled out parent name call thing. Whatever. Dagur
raised a hand, dismissing Hiccup's words. The heavy steps of what wasn't
immediately a dragon in Dagur's mind had him whipping around, terror flitting
across his face. Toothless stopped short once he saw the fear in Dagur's eyes.
He whimpered sadly. Hiccup blinked, hands falling to his sides. He didn't
expect such a look of fear from Dagur these days. Of course, he had seen it a
few times when they were younger in response to Toothless. But now? Something
was up. Dagur knew Toothless wouldn't hurt him. That was no startled look.
Dagur hadn't registered Toothless yet, and stumbled back. His memory displayed
some very unhappy images, replacing Toothless' dark silhouette with that of his
nightmare's star. He gasped when his heel caught a stone, downing him with a
thud.
Toothless leaped to the rescue, and Hiccup shouted. "Toothless! No!"
He was too late, Toothless was at a frightened Dagur's side, attempted to
comfort him with a few quick nudges. It looked like he was trying to help him
up. Dagur obviously wasn't seeing it as help. The older boy was desperately
pushing at the dragon's head, crying out in fear. "No! Get off! No, no, no!"
Hiccup was nearly there when Dagur unleashed a chilling scream that resembled
the one Hiccup had heard this morning. It was all so fast. Why couldn't he get
there fast enough? Toothless was terrorizing Dagur. "Toothless, buddy! Stop!
Please! You're scaring him!" He was in the process of pushing a very concerned
dragon off of Dagur when another approached his behind.
Hiccup cried out in exasperation. "Shattermaster, no!" The sight of a second
dragon had Dagur screaming even louder. "What is going on!?" Hiccup shouted.
"Toothless! Go away! Shattermaster, go!" Hiccup bellowed as loud as he could,
nearly hitting the ground when Toothless dashed out from under his shoves. Both
dragons looked more than crestfallen as they hurried away. Toothless stopped a
few feet away, looking back forlornly.
Dagur was scrambling back, sobbing. What? This made no sense. "Toothless, go.
I'm sorry, bud." The dragon grumbled sadly as he turned and raced away. He'd
have to find a way to make it up to the dragon. For now, he needed to see what
in Thor just happened. He turned to Dagur, who was gasping wetly, still on the
ground.
"Dagur, they're gone. Look at me. Dagur!" He fell to his knees, grabbing the
hand that came up to protect Dagur's face. Did Dagur think he was going to hurt
him? Hiccup pushed the hand down, looking right at Dagur.
"Hiccup?"
"Yeah, its Hiccup. What- What just happened?"
The waterworks immediately stopped. "Nothing!" Dagur violently wiped at the
tears on his face. "They surprised me!" Hiccup never even thought to believe
such yak dung.
The bigger boy attempted to stand, but failed. It seemed that his knees were
shaking so bad that he couldn't.
Hiccup watched helplessly as Dagur curled in on himself, a fist clenching at
the grass angrily. He could tell he was fighting tears.
"Dagur- They weren't trying to hurt you." The other boy didn't look at him.
"Stop thinking about the past, Dagur. Its over. You aren't that person anymore.
I see that- that you got stuck in the past for a second there- and- and you
lost your grip on the now." That was his only solution.
"Toothless would never hurt you. He cares about you now."
"Thats not it!" A deranged sort of pain entered Dagur's voice. "Thats not it!"
He repeated. "Its nothing! Leave it alone!" Hiccup saw the immediate regret in
Dagur's brilliant green eyes. The other boy hurried to his feet. Hiccup was
right about earlier. Dagur's knees were wobbling.
Dagur snarled, holding his forearms to his chest for a moment. He kept his side
to Hiccup, avoiding facing his back towards him at all costs. Hiccup sat in the
grass in shock. Dagur's arms fell to his sides, fists forming. He stalked away,
and once he was forced to turn his back on Hiccup, he broke into a sprint.
Hiccup watched helplessly. Questions raged through his mind.
***** Speak *****
Hiccup thought about Dagur the rest of the day. No, he did not approach him
again. He had a feeling that Dagur desperately needed the space. Who was he to
deny him of that? Instead, he observed from a distance. So far, it was more
than obvious that something was up, and he'd be worried if one of the others
didn't come up with questions. Hiccup was just shocked at who exactly came up
with these questions.
Snotlout's heavy steps qued Hiccup to his approach. "Yes, Snotlout, what is it
now? The twins bothering you again?" Hiccup sat his mug aside, looking up from
the map sprawled across the table in the clubhouse. The shorter boy sat down
with a huff and an icy glare. "What did you do to my friend, Hiccup?"
"Erm... What do you mean by that, exactly?" That earned him a growl.
"Dagur! He's freakin' me out, and I know its your fault."
Hiccup sighed, rubbing his palm across his forehead. "What exactly is he doing
to freak you out?"
Snotlout took a deep breath. Oh, Hiccup was in for it. "Well, for starters, he
won't look anyone in the eye, let alone turn his back to them! He won't look at
me, I can't have that. I am pleasant to look at, why won't he look!? And then,
he refuses an offer for snacks, lunch, and my invite to dinner. He denied
everyone's invite. What is up with that? And he won't go near Fishlegs or any
of the dragons except for Smidvarg and the Terrible Terrors. Is he sick? Did
you make him sick, Hiccup? Because if you made him sick, I will make you sick!
With my fist! In your face! Or your stomach, because that makes more sense!"
Hiccup groaned. It was worse than he thought. He really hoped Dagur didn't plan
on skipping every meal. "I'd talk to him, but I think I upset him, Snotlout."
"Upset him? Upset him how?"
"Well, its sort of complicated. And I'm sure Dagur would prefer that I didn't
tell you."
"What!? I'm like his best friend!"
"Thats the logic I used, but he won't talk. I think he just needs space. He-
He's a little shook up."
"Pft. A little. Well, whatever."
Snotlout stood, and when he did, he shook the whole table. Hiccup snatched his
wobbling mug to save his map, shaking his head. The other boy left the
clubhouse, arms folded. Hiccup gazed outside, watching Shattermaster buzz
around aimlessly. The poor thing was lost without Dagur. It was surprising how
good Dagur was with the Gronckle. It was impressive, really, the many ways
Dagur practically gave Shattermaster agility. Gronkles were not known for
agility, yet somehow, Dagur had drawn it out of Shattermaster.
Hiccup really, really needed to talk to Dagur about turning down those
invitations. It certainly sounded like Dagur was planning on skipping every
meal. Come to think of it now, he hadn't seen Dagur during breakfast. He
couldn't have a dragon rider working on an empty stomach.
"Toothless, buddy, I need your help."
Without hesitation, his Night Fury approached, looking expectant. "I'm sorry
about earlier, bud. I don't know what got into Dagur, I just know it wasn't
good. Come on, lets go see him." Yeah, he had said Dagur needed space, but
lunch was right around the corner. That glimpse of Stormfly headed toward the
back of the clubhouse he had caught on his way out let him know this.
With Heather on a solo mailing mission, Astrid did the cooking. Heather was
getting antsy here at The Edge, so Hiccup gave her something to do. He asked
her to bring a package to Berk, a rather big package. She'd need a ship, to
carry it, and a dragon to guard it. He doubted she'd run into much trouble.
Johann had arrived just on time, and allowed Heather to tag along with him on
his ship and route. She had no problem accompanying him to the few places he
needed to visit first.
Hiccup climbed onto Toothless' back, clicking his leg into place. They took
off, but took a while to approach Dagur. Hiccup figured they should approach
slowly. First he needed to find him, anyways. So, he took a lap around the
other side of the base, letting Toothless ease into a gentle glide. Once
Toothless relaxed beneath him, he began his search. "You see him anywhere,
bud?" The dragon grunted, shaking his head.
Hiccup sighed and sat up, running a hand through his windswept hair. He leaned
back, hands behind him to prop him up. He felt no fear, only trust and freedom.
Hiccup knew Toothless would never let him get hurt. Toothless wasn't fond of
any look of fear Hiccup might produce. As he thought, Hiccup realized he didn't
like seeing Dagur scared or hurt either. Some part of him saw Dagur as a boy
still. When Dagur was nineteen, he saw him as his own age. Maybe it was because
of that innocent look in Dagur's eyes. When the older boy smiled, like a civil
being, he just looked so... small, and young. He still looks so.
Toothless yipped and gargled to catch Hiccup's attention. It certainly worked
and he sat at the ready, patting Toothless' neck. "What is it?" Toothless
circled his target, chortling. "I see him. Be careful now, I heard he's shy of
dragons today..." He and Toothless decended gently, a ways away from Dagur.
Dagur wasn't oblivious. He was walking into the woods, which was a little
strange, but he was looking up at Hiccup and his dragon. They landed a safe
distance away, on a hill, and Hiccup hurried to get off. "Stay here." Toothless
pouted, but sat right where he was.
"Dagur, I need to talk to you." He panted, jogging down the hill towards Dagur.
He was forced to change his route as Dagur walked the other way to the forest.
Hiccup avoided going behind him, slowing to a brisk walk beside the other boy.
When Dagur didn't speak, he proceeded. "Snotlout told me something."
Again, Dagur didn't reply. He just kept walking, a determined look on his face.
"You can't skip meals. At least go to lunch. With me. Please." His words were
broken up, as he was panting something fierce.
Dagur wasn't talking. "Really? Silent treatment? Come on, you." Hiccup grabbed
the older boy's arm, gasping when Dagur jumped and pushed him away. They both
stood there, shocked. Hiccup held his breath, his own forest green eyes gazing
into brilliant green eyes. The tension and the stranger like look in Dagur's
eyes were awfully familiar. It made Hiccup think back to all his encounters
with strange dragons. In fact, the silent, yet roaring tension was all too
similar. It gave him an idea. Dagur. Wild dragon. Approach with caution. They
don't want to hurt you. They just don't want to be hurt themselves. Hiccup
blinked, approaching slowly. He raised a hand, and aimed it towards Dagur's
shoulder. Hiccup stopped when Dagur tensed and took a step back.
Well, this was rather strange, but it was better than his other plan,
apparently. "Dagur, I'm not going to hurt you. You can trust me. Remember?
Brothers? Heh- Hey, look at me. That's it." He couldn't believe he was talking
to Dagur like he was a dragon. In a way, it made a little sense. "I won't hurt
you. If that's what you think is going to happen, its not. I wouldn't ever hurt
you if I had things my way, alright? Hey, hey, keep those eyes on me." Oh, he
was glad they were alone. This would be a little more than embarrassing. But,
if it was what Dagur needed to feel safe, which it was obvious that he didn't
today, then he would do it. Dagur deserved that, even if he didn't think so
himself.
When Hiccup felt it was safe to do so, he took a few slow steps towards Dagur.
He stopped the second Dagur moved to take his own step away. Hey, they were
making progress at least. Even if Dagur took one step back for every two steps
Hiccup took forward. Dagur still wasn't inclined to speak.
"Its alright. Take a deep breath. You said it yourself, it can do wonders."
Dagur seemed to follow his instructions, taking what seemed to be a deep breath
through his nose. "Now, I'm going to come even closer and I need you to trust
me when I say, I will not hurt you." Once past the feeling of ridiculousness,
Hiccup felt what was close to a feeling of hurt. Or pity. They were rather
close. He took one more step, and something twinged in his chest as he watched
the look of mistrust in Dagur's eyes shift into one of fear and sadness. "Don't
be scared. It's just little ol' me. I don't know who or what you're seeing
right now, but I need you to see me." He knew a haunted stare when he saw one.
"Hiccup-" At the sound of his name coming from Dagur's mouth, Hiccup breathed a
sigh of relief. "Yes? I'm right here." Hiccup dared to take another step. One
more and he'd be touching Dagur's arm with his outstretched hand.
Dagur didn't speak for a moment. He furrowed his brow and studied Hiccup's
hand. He looked back to Hiccup. "I'm busy. I don't feel like playing." The
older boy took multiple steps back. Hiccup scrambled to speak. "Da- Hey- Wait!
Dagur- What do you mean?"
"I'm busy." He repeated.
"Well- When- When you're done, will you come to the clubhouse for some food,
please? For me?"
"... Sure..." Once at what Dagur felt was a safe distance, he spun around and
jogged off into the forest.
"Be careful!" Hiccup shouted, and never got a reply.
. . . . . . . . . .
"Playing? I don't feel like playing?" Hiccup frowned in puzzlement, looking
towards the sea as he and Hiccup patrolled to backside of the island for any
sign of Dagur. It had been about half an hour since that episode with Dagur.
Food would be cold by he time they got back. He wanted to find Dagur, and when
he did, all they'd have to do is heat up the food. It was simple.
Well, maybe not. He hadn't seen Dagur since he ran off. Hiccup hoped he hadn't
gotten himself hurt. It was still daytime, and it had only been thirty minutes,
but Dagur was pretty out of it. He and Toothless dove towards the forest, to
get a closer look. They glided above the treetops, eyes searching.
Hiccup grunted when he caught a glimpse of blazing red hair. "There." Hiccup
swung around, swooping beneath the trees. At least he was still mindful of
distance. Dagur seemed to tense at the sight of Toothless. "Stay right there,
Toothless." Hiccup left him beneath a large tree. "Ready for lunch, Dagur?"
Dagur was seated on a rock, shifting his gaze to look down.
"Its probably cold by now, but we can heat it up. By the way... What were you
doing out here?"
The older boy didn't look up, and Hiccup hesitantly and carefully sat beside
him.
"Hiccup?"
Thank the Gods. He was talking. "Yes?"
"Why do you care?"
"What do you mean by that?" Hiccup chuckled awkwardly.
"I mean, why did you follow me back there? And why are you here now?"
"Well... Despite what Astrid and Heather might say, you're one of us..." A
glimpse of red, something that wasn't hair made him frown.
"Dagur. What's that?"
"Its nothing. Just a scratch."
Hiccup wouldn't take that for an answer. He grabbed Dagur's arm, pulling it
towards himself. "What is this?"
"Nothing, its fine. A scratch, Hiccup." At least he seemed to be in a better
mood.
"This isn't just some scratch. Its too small to be a dragon scratch. Unless you
made a Terrible Terror mad."
"Yeah," Dagur laughed, "Terrible Terror, thats what happened."
"Really?"
"Really. Ha- don't pull their tails!"
Dagur pulled his arm away from Hiccup, and glared down to the grass beneath his
feet.
Hiccup decided not to press it much further. "How about we get you back to the
clubhouse?"
"Dagur...? Can you handle Toothless right now?"
That had Dagur looking up, a startled look on his face, and then a defensive
one. "Of course I can." It seemed that he realized the sort of face he was
making, and quickly replaced it with a smile.
"Alright then. Toothless!" The dragon was smart enough to approach carefully.
At the sight of Dagur, he lowered his head, as if to make himself seem smaller.
He garbled gently, tilting his head at the frail look Dagur gave him.
Toothless could sense the fear, it made his frills flatten to his neck out of
pity. He was slow to proceed, taking a few sniffs. Fear clung to his nostrils,
and a bad feeling settled in his stomach. Finally, at Dagur's feet, he lowered
himself to his belly, nudging Dagur's knees. Unseen tremors travelled from
Dagur's body to his own. Toothless' big eyes conveyed his sympathy.
Hiccup watched Dagur take a deep breath, and reach to rub the dragon's head.
. . . . . . . . . .
Dagur blinked slowly, holding his breath as he touched Toothless' head. At
least he saw a dragon, this time. He closed his eyes, hoping to erase what he
had seen earlier. Earlier, he had not seen dragons. Earlier he had seen Oswald
and Alvin. Their silhouettes hiding the light. Their tattered hands and fingers
grabbing him. Their broad shoulders looming over him. Dagur shook his head,
opening his green eyes to see Toothless. He couldn't contain his relieved huff.
"Hey, buddy. Hows it goin'?"
Toothless grinned, a very toothless grin. Dagur couldn't help but laugh and
scratch the little guy's scales. A split tongue lulled out, coating his arm in
spit. Dagur hummed happily, resorting to two hands, one to scratch the dragon's
chin and another to rub his brow. Toothless seemed to be happy about it.
Dagur sent a glance in Hiccup's direction. He seemed to be happy about it as
well. "Time to go?" Dagur asked.
"Er- Oh, yes." Toothless stood, looking to his rider. Hiccup climbed on,
offering a hand to Dagur. Hesitantly, Dagur took it. He got comfortable behind
Hiccup, tired eyes looking back to the forest. He was exhausted. Dagur guessed
he wasn't getting good sleep between nightmares. Well, he was sleeping, just
not getting any rest from it. If anything, sleep was more taxing than anything
else.
Toothless took to the air, headed straight for the base. They glided through
the air, riding the breeze. Dagur refrained from holding onto Hiccup, instead,
he held onto the sides of the saddle.
Once at the clubhouse, they landed and entered silently. As expected, the food
was there, but cold.
"Toothless, low burn, please." The dragon opened his jaws, purple light and a
dull screech filling the otherwise empty room.
Dagur stared into the Night Fury's mouth, as he had done many times before.
Instinctual fear was what he felt as the purple light harshened and the screech
grew louder.
Hiccup placed the food beneath Toothless' jaws, to warm it up. He only needed
to wait a few moments before the food was steaming. Dagur stared into the light
of Toothless' heat, looking back on all the times he had before. Toothless had
been more than ready to kill him that time he worked with the Dragon Hunters to
get closer to Shattermaster, who he saved. He remembered staring into that
purple mouth for a few split seconds.
A few split seconds was all it took for his body to react.
Toothless turned to look at him, in the process of closing his mouth.
Dagur jumped, bumping into one of the tables as the purple followed him. Get
away, get away, get away.
Hiccup's voice reached him as Toothless shut his mouth with a quizical tilt of
his head.
"Dagur? Hey!"
Dagur shook his head, looking to Hiccup. Once he regained his footing, he
plastered on a wide grin. "Lost my balance."
Hiccup squinted. Then he grunted and handed Dagur his food.
They ate in silence. Dagur knew Hiccup was searching for his eyes, hoping to
make contact no doubt. Hiccup would gain no such thing. Dagur was done for the
day. Done looking, and certainly done speaking.
. . . . . . . . . .
Hiccup finally gave up once he got down to the last few bits of food on his
platter. He stared down at the food, thinking as he chewed. After a moment, he
forgot to even think at all. He simply gave his plate a blank stare. He hadn't
even realized that Dagur had left the room, leaving his plate half empty.
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