Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/12396702. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Major_Character_Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage Category: M/M Fandom: One_Direction_(Band) Relationship: Harry_Styles/Louis_Tomlinson Character: Harry_Styles, Louis_Tomlinson, Niall_Horan, Liam_Payne, Zayn_Malik, Nick Grimshaw, Ben_Winston, Josh_Devine Additional Tags: Non-Consensual_Touching, Anal_Sex, Anal_Fingering, Rape/Non-con_Elements, Feminization, Feminist_Themes, Forced_Orgasm, Forced_Prostitution, Forced Feminization, Reconciliation_Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional_Hurt/Comfort, Emotional_Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological_Abuse, Child_Abuse, Implied_Relationships, Suicidal_Thoughts, Top_Louis, Bottom_Harry, Domestic Stats: Published: 2017-10-18 Updated: 2018-02-02 Chapters: 14/? Words: 23020 ****** Love's a Little Thicker ****** by pornstars Summary "My Daddy likes to hurt me." "Your Daddy?" I asked. "Mhm, but he said not to tell because then he'll do even worse things to me." Harry Styles, age sixteen and a victim of domestic violence comes across his new neighbor and high school teacher Louis Tomlinson. Warning: This is a very, very mature and dark book. It's based on my life with some things changed of course to keep it confidential. If you cannot read this, then don't. I don't want you to. This is a very triggering book and it is the time I fight my demons and let it out of me through writing. If you have anything rude to say, keep it. But feel free to drop constructive criticism. Don't turn this to a stupid stan twitter debate. It's fiction, but it's from a non fictional story. My story. ***** ONE ***** ***** ONE *****   HARRY STYLES   "Gosh darn it." It's the morning and I absolutely hate the mornings. It means waking up, brushing your teeth, and preparing yourself for another long day of stress and more stress. At least, that's how it's been for me. I'm Harry, a boring little boy that's about to start high school soon and I'm really nervous. Much of the kids in middle school never really liked me because apparently, I was too weird. I never really knew why they thought I was weird, to be honest. I was a little different from the other boys though, maybe that's why they all picked on me? Yeah, that had to be it. I liked wearing dresses for Pete's sake and what kind of boy likes to wear dresses? Well, I'm that kind of boy. I love dresses, I also really like skirts and pretty pink clips to pin into my hair. I like overalls that were soft to the touch with beautiful pastel colors that reminded me of strawberry milkshakes. I love creamy white shoes that matched all of my outfits, but no one else seemed to understand that. No one. Not even my Daddy. Daddy hates it, hates it so much that his little boy likes pink and wearing dresses. Oh yeah, Daddy. I live with him and only him since my mummy left me when I was little. Daddy says it's my fault that she left and would remind me of that every day. sometimes he would do things I don't think daddies are supposed to do.... I never tell anyone about that so I shouldn't tell you either. It's a secret Daddy said to keep or else he'll do worse things to me. But, I'm a happy boy now because middle school is over and high school's going to start. I never had any friends so this means i'll be starting a whole new place in hopes of looking for actual friends this time. I'm scared it might not happen, but a boy can hope right? "Harry! get the hell down here. What on earth are you fucking doing alone in your room?" Oh shoot, that's my Daddy. I'll have to go now, but I'm excited to carry on our conversation later. ... "Well, done with that diary entry." I said to myself, placing my little pink diary back underneath my bed. I thought it would be a good idea to just let my thoughts run a little, to tell my journal about my upcoming expectations for high school. I'm a little scared to be honest and I hope Daddy's going to be a little less mean to me since I'll be busy with school again. I'm so glad summer vacation is over now. Even though I hate a lot of things about school, it's better than staying home with Daddy. Way better. Daddy called me earlier this morning for something while I was writing in my journal. If I'm honest, I was so scared he was going to do dirty things to me again that I almost didn't go. But if I didn't go he would've came up to me himself and then hurt me more than usual. Instead, he didn't do anything to me today and said we had a new neighbor next door. Usually Daddy never cared about new neighbors, at least not enough to tell me about it. So I was really, very surprised to see Daddy packing some cupcakes into a box and asking me to greet the neighbor with them. Then Daddy said, "I'm sick of of just fucking with you, Harry. It's time I make friends and make something out of my shitty anti social life." If I understood enough without the mean words, Daddy said he wants some friends. I wish I was brave enough to do the same and make some friends of my own, but every time I tried, people called me stupid or weird. It never works for me, so I wonder if this would work for daddy. But then I don't understand why Daddy is sending me rather than going himself. Maybe he was shy? "Take the cupcakes to the neighbor next door and make sure to tell me what happens okay? Tell them Mr. styles made them and he hopes to get well acquainted with his new neighbors. Got it?" I nodded to daddy's words, but I wasn't sure what acquainted means. Hopefully I say it right when I meet the man next door. Daddy shoves the box of cupcakes into my hands and I was surprised to see how pretty the colors were. A lot of the cupcake were shaded in different colors of the rainbow and they looked so yummy. I wish daddy made cupcakes like this for me, but he still hates me for mummy leaving years ago. So i guess that means no cupcakes for me, ever. Whatever, Daddy's always big fat meanie anyway. Don't tell him I said that though, he'll hurt me. "Okay." I mumbled and slipped into my soft pink shoes, but making sure I don't slip with the cupcakes in my hands, "I'll see you later, Daddy!" "Just give the fucking cupcakes, Harold." I scrunch my nose up at the awful tone my daddy has and as well as the fact that he called me Harold. I hate that name. I suck in the fresh air and close the door behind me as I make my way out of the home. It's a beautiful day today and there were birds chirping and flowers blooming. Makes me kind of want to throw my shoes off and run around the green grass. But I had to give these cupcakes first. "You can run around later, Harry." I said to myself and walked to the home next door. The house was pretty big actually and I never took the time to see how big it is. Maybe the man was rich? I don't know. I never cared about my neighbors since Daddy didn't either, but now I'm kind of forced to since he's making me give the owner cupcakes. I'm now at the front and oh gosh i'm kind of nervous. what if the owner thinks i'm weird, or hates the cupcakes, or hurts me? But, I have to give the cupcakes because if I come back home with the box in my hands Daddy's going to get very mad again. Well here goes. I knock on the heavy brown door with my hand and I couldn't help, but notice how white my skin is compared to the door and it almost looks like I'm glowing. Cool. "Hello?!" *****   ***** ***** TWO ***** ***** TWO *****   LOUIS TOMLINSON   This place is a fucking mess! Jesus Christ, I need to clean everything up before I can start my damn day job. Wait no, not damn . I'm actually into this job. It's weird I guess, being a 30 year old that moves a lot and lives alone, but then again it isn't weird if your excuse is you've got an important job to go after. Well, I'm a highschool teacher, well, starting to be a teacher for high school. I used to teach at elementary schools back up in doncaster until I was given a tenure for a high school in Cheshire, so I had to move just to be a bit more closer. Like, come on, it's annoying to live in a whole different city while your job is in a whole other place. Some teachers love the travel, but I don't. Yeah, fuck that. I'm in the middle of unpacking all of my crap so I could settle into my job that starts tomorrow, for god's sake, without the annoyance of 'shit did I unpack that' or 'fuck I'll miss the footie game if I don't get to record it' or 'fuck I'll walk home and starve.' I was in the middle of unboxing my television set when I heard a knock on my door. "Uh." that's weird who could be knocking at my door? Pretty sure I've got no friends or visitors to expect in this place. Really weird. I place the box down and walk towards my door and quickly peek through the peephole to see a little... girl? Well I think ? Their face looks soft and boyish, but they were wearing a short pale pink dress with pink shoes with their hair all long and curly, cupping their rosy face. Aw, how cute. I hear a small hello and quickly unlock the door to pull it open. "Um hey! What's a little girl like you doing here?" I ask. "Um. H-hi." they mumble, "Um. I'm not a girl sir, I'm a boy. I'm Harry. Your neighbor! I b-brought cupcakes." Oh. Oh, they're a boy. Oh shit. "Oh! Oh sorry love. I couldn't tell," I wince at how disgustingly inappropriate it was to say that, "I mean-" "No, no it's okay sir. Don't worry." I watch the boy clack his shoes together as he tiptoes on his feet and raises the box to me, "Daddy made cupcakes and told me come over and give them to our new neighbor. I didn't get your name, though, sir?" I look at the cupcakes and they do look pretty good because fuck i didn't eat anything since driving here with my crap, "I'm Louis, Louis Tomlinson." "Ooooh," the boy looks at me in awe, "You look pretty old, how old are you?" I chuckle at the blunt honesty, "I'm 30 and you are?" "I'm 16, sir and gosh you are almost as old as my daddy," he says. For some reason, the way he said daddy sent a strange tingling feeling up my spine. Okay, Tomlinson, shut the fuck up. "Say, how about you come inside and put the cupcakes down. I've got a lot of unpacking to do and it's best if we sit and chat while i'm unpacking. You could help me finish these cupcakes too because I sure won't eat all these myself." The boy's eyes seem to light up and he asks me, "Really? For real?" I'm a little confused by how shocked he sounds, "Yeah, come on in." He starts to take off his shoes and a chuckle at his cute attempt and remaining traditional, "Keep your shoes on love." "But Daddy says that it's rude to step into people's homes with dirty shoes." "Well, I'm not your Daddy," I laugh and fuck did that sound weird. "Oh. Okay, sir." "And please just call me Louis." The boy giggles and gosh that's the prettiest sound I've heard this week, "Okay, Louis ." He walks into my home and he's staring around the place as he makes his way to my kitchen to place the cupcakes onto the large center table. "Your house is so big sir- I mean Louis," Harry gasps and starts skipping around like the child he is, "Say, can I maybe help you unpack?" Oh god, a half of me just thanked god because getting help of any kind today sounds like a blessing and here he is offering to help, "If you can that'd be fucking great." Harry gasps all of a sudden and covers his mouth in shock. "What?" "You said a naughty word, Mr. Tomlinson!" I roll my eyes at the extreme innocent behavior Harry's got on, "It's okay, Harry. I'm an old man. As long as you don't say it, it's okay." "It's still a bad word, but I guess you're right. Daddy says it a lot to me, but he gets mad if I ever try to say it back. I can't even say 'freaking' if it's to cover the naughty word," says Harry. I kind of felt a little irked by the mention of his father. Especially since Harry just said his father 'says it a lot' and towards him. That's kind of strange, but I don't want to question him and his father's relationship if it's just about cursing. Like, his father was nice enough to deliver cupcakes so. "Are you rich, Mr. Tomlinson? This house looks big and really nice." Does it really? I thought it was pretty basic. Not to be cocky or anything, but it will start looking like a cool house after I decorate and add in all my crap from my previous large home. But I guess anything can fascinate a young boy. "I guess? I'm going to work as a high school teacher though so I doubt it sounds or looks like I'm a rich man." I laugh and start working on the boxes to unpack. Harry then watches and follows up immediately to help me pull the box off my items. Aw, how sweet and helpful. "A High School teacher?" Harry asks, "That's so cool! I'm starting high school tomorrow too!" Ah so he's going to be a little freshman, cute. "Really? Where you going?" "I'm going to Cheshire's high school! I'm so excited! I can't wait to make new friends because in middle school I didn't have any and it gets kind of lonely and I don't like staying home that much." Harry rambles, "I  really hope I make some friends." My heart broke at that, especially from how sulky Harry's tone is as he said those things. "I'm sure you'll make friends Harry! You're super sweet and would you look at that, You and I are friends!" I say, "and did you say Cheshire High? I'm actually going to teach English and Arts there!" Harry claps his hands in excitement, "Oh my gosh! Really?! And we're friends now, do you really mean that!?" Hearing him question if I was serious made me feel even softer for the boy, "Yes, Harry. I do." "Promise?" "I promise, Harry." "Wait." The boy says and he looks like he's thinking. I wonder what he's thinking about, "Do you pinky promise?" Oh my god, is he really that innocent? He stuck his pinky out to me and I swear I could've just cried at how beautiful of a child he is, how pure he is. "I pinky promise," I say and lock my pinky in with his. Well, so far this city's been serving me well. ***** THREE ***** *****   ***** ***** THREE ***** *****   ***** HARRY STYLES *****   ***** Oh my gosh! Louis said he's my friend . Louis said we're friends . He even pinky promised and let me tell you now, pinky promises are very, very important. Last time in middle school I tried to do that with other people who said they wanted to be friends, but they all laughed at me. I guess that means they're not true friend material. I mean, it did hurt to hear them laugh at me but who cares. They all thought it was stupid? Well, Louis here thinks it's okay and he didn't laugh. He pinky promised for real and now we're friends! Louis kept smiling at me so I guess it's all good now and we got back to unpacking. We didn't talk much and time kept passing on by and after tripping over random packaging we were done unpacking! "Looks like all the boxes are gone, harry!" Louis looked really happy to be finished putting away all the boxes, but the house was still a little messy with all the stuff put into organized piles. "Will we also put your things away?" I ask. "Nah, I'm going to do that don't worry. I just needed my stuff out so I could grab it quickly when I need to," he says. Oh. I frown a little because that means we're done today and I have to get back home to daddy. I really don't want to go home today. at least maybe once? because daddy's always mean and I hate it. especially at night time after he drinks a bottle of juice, he gets really mean and then he starts touching me in places daddies shouldn't be touching, at least that's what I think. I'm sure Daddy isn't supposed to touch my princess' parts. That's what Daddy calls them and sometimes it hurts there so I never understood why it's called "princess parts." princess' are pink and pretty and nice, but all I feel is a pain, sometimes red, and upset. Louis looks into the kitchen and then back at me, "At least we can relax now and have some of those cupcakes your dad made!" Oh yay! the cupcakes I almost forgot! "Yes!" "Does your dad have a specific time for when he wants you back home, though? It's already getting pretty late." I shake my head knowing that Daddy does have a time limit and that I have to be home by 5 p.m. and it's already almost 6 p.m., but today Daddy said to make friends with the neighbor so he's going to have to deal with me being late I guess. "Alright, good. Don't want you to be getting in trouble or scare your dad since you're hanging out with an old man like me." "My Daddy's scarier," I whisper. "What?" Oh shoot, did I say that out loud? Oh my gosh! "N-nothing! Let's go eat the cupcakes, please! I really want one," I say and tug at Louis' arm to lead him to his kitchen. Louis seemed a little confused but he nodded anyway and followed along. Darn it, Harry, you need to be careful with what you say! If Daddy finds out you're slipping words he'll get really mad. Very Mad. "Alright, which color do you want?" he asked me as he pulled the cupcakes out one by one and oh gosh do they look good. My tongue licks over my lips and I couldn't stop staring at the pretty rainbow sprinkles covering over the frosting. "Pink!" Louis looks at me with a big smile, "I figured, here you go darling." I blush at the word darling. Usually, I hear in movies that word. especially when the husband talks to his wife. I don't say anything or ask about it though because Louis' my friend and I don't want to creep him out with my weirdness. "Thank you, Louis," I say and take the cupcake, munching down on the creamy goodness as soon as I had the chance. oh gosh! it tastes really good! I wish daddy baked more cupcakes for just me, but Daddy says I can't have anything nice after scaring her away with my weirdness. "You're a very polite young boy, Harry. Your dad and mum surely raised you right." I frown at the word mum. mum didn't raise me, only daddy did. Mummy left me when I was a little 5 years old and then Daddy had to take care of me. I decide to tell Louis that since he doesn't know, "Only daddy raised me. My mummy left when I was five." Louis' jaw drops and he starts to say a lot of sorries. I giggle at him, "it's okay Louis! you didn't know." "So just you and your dad live together?" I nod. "Ah okay, then credit to your father." I nod again, but I wince at the thought of Daddy being praised for raising me. if anything, Daddy hurts me so much if I do anything wrong so I need to make sure I am careful with anyone because if anyone tells daddy what I did... he gets really really mad. Then he starts to hurt me a lot and touches me even more. I shiver a little and Louis notices. "You okay, Harry?" "Oh! Yes, I'm fine. I'm just enjoying this cupcake!" I squeal, kicking my feet to cover up my awkward reaction. "Ah okay then. well, it is getting quite late so finish your cupcake up and head on home. alright? thanks so much for helping me unpack harry and make sure to thank your father for giving me these cupcakes! they really are quite delicious." Louis says. I try not to frown again because I do need to get home and daddy's probably waiting for me and it's been hours since I left. Oh dear. "Okay, Louis!" I munch the last bit of cupcake into my mouth and drop to my feet properly now, "I'll be heading home now then! I'll see you tomorrow?" "You sure will!" Louis follows me out the door and waves a goodbye, "Bye, Harry!" "Bye, Louis" He closes the door and I look at the house next to his, my house. the living room lights are on which means Daddy's still awake. Well, time to get home now. ***** ***** ***** FOUR ***** ***** FOUR ***** *****   ***** HARRY STYLES *****   ***** WARNING ⚠️: graphic rape depicted.  *****   ***** My hands shake a little when I'm reaching out to knock on my own white front door. Daddy's home right now and he's probably grumpy because I stayed pretty late at Mr. Tomlinsons'. But I gather myself together and knock on the door. just as I did, the door quickly swings open and I see daddy with his glaring green eyes and grumpy face and that horrible juice in his hand. I never understood how he would like such a drink because it tasted too bad. It's like rotten apple juice to me and I know this because last time daddy made me drink some with his friends before they all started to play with me like daddy does when we're alone. I never remember those days because after I drink the juice I get dizzy and sick all over. but I just remember his friends doing some stuff daddy does to me and then I pass out. For some reason, I'm glad I never remember those days. "What took you so fucking long, Harold." Great there he goes calling me that ugly name again. I want to tell him It's Harry, but then he starts hitting my face whenever I do. I hate it when he does that it makes me cry a lot. But I try to stay happy because if I let Daddy make me feel bad, then he's happy and I don't want him happy. I really don't. So I act like it's okay and I let myself stay happy. because when I do that everything hurts less. "I was dropping off cupcakes at-" "I know where you fucking were, Harold." he grabs my arm and yanks me inside. Ouch, that hurt a lot when he grabbed my arm. I guess it's not going to be an easy night either, but it never was so why did I expect anything different. "Daddy please let go you're hurting me-" "and you're hurting my rules. I've told you your fucking time limits. you went to give the man cupcakes and then you're supposed come back right home where the fuck was you?" I whimper when I felt his hand wrap around my wrist a bit tighter, "I was helping Mr. Tomlinson out, Daddy." He squeezes even harder, "With what?" "W-with unpacking, Daddy." "Unpacking? Unpacking his dick like the whore you are I'm assuming? because I did ask you to return home right after dropping off those cupcakes. When did I ask you to stay over at his house for hours?" I close my eyes because he's saying those nasty words again and I hate it so much, "i-i didn't do anything dirty, Daddy. I promise. Louis said we're friends now." "Louis said we're friends now blah blah blah," Daddy repeated what I said but he said it in a funny way and oh gosh he's getting angrier I think, "I don't fucking care what he said, Harry. you were supposed to be back here hours ago!" he shouts, loud enough to hurt my ears, "Now be a good little girl and walk to Daddy's room, take off your clothes, and lay down on the bed with that strawberry lube I got you the other day. Daddy's got to punish his little girl for being so bad, right?" Oh no not again. I could never tell the difference between his punishments and punishments. They all hurt me and I hate it when Daddy touches me. "B-but Daddy I didn't do anything! tomorrow's school Daddy!" "Listen to what I fucking said Harry!" he yanks me again and throws me on the ground and then slaps my face. I try my best not to cry, but I feel tears springing up in my eyes because my cheeks were hurting now and it burns. "Daddy please stop." I cried, hoping he'll listen at least one time. "Save your fucking begging for the bed, Harry. Now go." "Daddy-" "I said go!" he screams louder now and takes a gulp from that horrible bottle of juice and then kicks me really hard on my thigh. "I-I'm going!" I cry and get to my feet, running up to Daddy's room before he could grab me again. I hate him so much, but this is what I live through and what I'm stuck with. I just hope high school's going to be okay and at least today I made a new friend. I just hope I don't scare Mr. Tomlinson away. ... "I told you to get your bloody clothes off." I'm in Daddy's room lying down on his fluffy bed that's fluffier than mine. I don't like his room so many bad things happen in here and this room is also really ugly too. my room's pink and after working up some money from selling lemonade back in middle school I had enough money to buy all my pretty pink stuff to decorate and dress. Daddy never wanted to buy me pretty stuff but he didn't say anything when I got them by myself. "I-I am Daddy." "Well do it faster Harry, I've got work tomorrow and thanks to you coming back fucking late I have to make this quick so I could get some sleep." I nod and remove my panties off and lay on the bed waiting. "Look at how pretty my baby girl is." Daddy whispers and he's getting on top of me with his clothes off too. It always felt icky to me when his skin would burn against mine, but when we did this the first time ever he got really mad when I tried pushing him off and he hit me really bad. There were blood and bruises all over and I had to cover them up before anyone tried to see me because Daddy said other people would find out about our secret and then I'll be taken away to a very bad place for them. I start to breathe a little quicker now when I felt Daddy touching my thighs. he grips really roughly and I'm sure his ugly handprints are going to mark me up again. "Daddy hates punishing his little girl, but you know what happens when she disobeys me." He starts to pinch a little more and I wince when I felt his dry lips press against my neck. I hate it when he kisses me there because he leaves behind these scary looking marks that hurt when I poke it. I don't know what they are or why they look like that, but Daddy says it's to make sure people know that I'm already taken. but just to make sure no one gets suspicious, I have to cover it up with some of Mommy's old makeup. "Pretty soft skin, just like your mother's." He kisses down my chest and it starts to feel even funnier and my princess parts start to hurt now and poke upwards. Daddy says it means I like it, but I'm sure that I don't like any of this so why do my princess parts like it? Daddy starts to grip at my curls and pushes me down on the bed and kisses my tummy. It tickles there and I won't lie, I like the tickling, but I hate everything else because it just feels so weird. "D-daddy?" I cry out when I feel him poking into me with his finger, usually, that part hurts a little, but he says it gets better and usually it does because later it starts to feel fuzzy when he decides to stick his private into me. It hurts so much when he does that. that part hurts the most. every time, but he says it gets better and I should drop the crying. But it never gets better. Never. Daddy seems to like it though because he gets really excited and starts shouting really loud. he pinches my nipples too and then I start to scream because it hurts, not because I like it! Daddy thinks I like it though and goes harder into me saying, 'louder baby, louder!' I have my hands pushing against his structured chest, but not too much otherwise he thinks I'm being rude and then he hits me. just enough to move his sweaty chest because it starts to burn when he rubs against me. I'm trying hard not to cry again, but Daddy's slapping my bum quite a lot now and called me his 'bad baby girl' because I didn't make it home in time. "D-Daddy it's hurting!" I scream when I feel the tip of his part touching my bum and I can feel the slow stretching. I think he didn't use the lube because it's burning really bad and it's not slippery either. "That's what bad girls get when they don't listen to their Daddies, princess." I start crying because the pain's too much. it's too much. it hurts so much like every other time and I want it to stop. I want my life to stop, but I can't because that means Daddy wins. Daddy wins at making me really sad. I am sad, but I can't let him know how sad I am. it makes him happier. And today I made a new friend, Louis. so today wasn't bad at all he gave me a cupcake and said I was sweet and also said I'll make new friends in high school. so I need to stay strong for that I need to be happy so people would like me. I hope it'll work this time too because in middle school people thought I was crazy and strange, but this time I hope things are different. I also pinky promised Louis and I are friends, so if I go away and stop everything then Louis and I can't be friends and then I'll be the mean one for breaking the promise. Daddy starts to move a little faster now and I think he's almost done. I'm not moving too much and all I could think about was Louis next door with his pretty blue eyes and sweet voice. he was really nice to me and that's the first time that's happened to me. I like him a lot already. "F-fuck." Daddy whispers and stops suddenly and moves out of me. my bum stings from the sudden change and I couldn't help but whimper. "Open your mouth princess. Daddy's got his night time milk ready." Let me tell you now, that milk is nasty. It tastes nothing like milk and doesn't even look like milk. it looks like the type of milk that gets smelly and yucky after you leave it in the sun. I did that one time by accident and Daddy got so mad at me for leaving a whole gallon of milk outside after we just bought it from the store, but whatever. That's what it looks like. I open my mouth though because last time I said no and said milk doesn't come from there and he grabbed my mouth and really hurt my cheeks. he slapped me and said I was being naughty and forced his private into my mouth, saying I should like what Daddy gives me. "Good girl," he whispers and starts to shoot out of his thing that white stuff right into my mouth. sometimes he doesn't make it and it gets on my face and into my eyes. It tastes so salty and it burns a lot too, it's horrible and it smells really strange just like that nasty milk. "Scrape it up and eat all of it or I'll fucking hit you." Daddy warns. I do what he says and kitten lick it off my fingers, trying so hard not to spit. it's just so nasty. "Aw, baby." I look at him in confusion. "You didn't release?" he points down and grabs at my parts, "I've got you, baby. for being a good girl tonight let me help you, yeah?" I didn't want to say yes, but I can't say no. "Okay." He starts to twist me around in his hand and it sent so many fuzzies up my body and I couldn't help but whimper, "D-Daddy it feels funny again." and I feel like I need to go pee. "Come on baby, let go for Daddy." "Daddy. I-I. D-Daddy." I cover my face with my hands and shamefully let go into Daddy's hands who looks really happy. I hated that about myself, every time I try to stop it and then it doesn't and then Daddy looks happy about it. "Good girl, very good princess. Now go and take a shower and sleep. I've got to drop this ass of yours to school tomorrow anyway." Daddy says. I feel so sticky and yucky I really do need a shower, so I got on my feet and headed out of the door while Daddy just fell into the messy bed to sleep. I hate Daddy so much, but he's the only one that takes care of me. At least I'm worth it enough to keep around otherwise it's just me and only me. But I hate Daddy so much. But Louis comes to my mind and I smile again because today I made a new friend. I made a new friend named Louis. ***** FIVE ***** ***** FIVE *****   LOUIS TOMLINSON   I have died every day waiting for you     "Agh fuck."   There goes that blasted alarm! My eyes are heavy, mouth's sticky and sore from eating the cupcakes and forgetting to brush right after, and my bloody phone's blaring horrible music to wake me up. why do I have that song as my alarm anyway? Jesus, Louis you need to get your shit together.   Wait fuck, my job starts today in, "Holy shit it's already 7."   Fuck, classes begin at 8 a.m. which means I've got thirty minutes to brush, shower, dress, and eat and then twenty minutes to get to the school and then ten to scream at myself for not waking up earlier to get ready.   Sounds like a good plan.   I get off my mattress, which didn't have any bedsheets since I've still got to place all my damn furniture in the right places, and dig through my pile of hygienic items to find a toothbrush, paste, soap, slippers, and some other bullshit I use to clean myself in the mornings and run to the bathroom. got to make this quick, Tomlinson.   ...   "Keys? check. Notebooks? Check. Syllabus printed? Check. Homework lists? Check."   Okay, good everything seems to be in order. I checked my bags and office supply boxes that will be placed in the classroom I'll be taking over in just a half an hour. I made sure to check for any other excess materials I'll be needing and dumped those into the back of my car too. don't want to go low on anything and look like a fool on my first day for these high schoolers.   I made sure to pack up some lunch and decided it was time to hit the road and drive my way to school, but as soon as I placed my box into the car I heard sniffling from a couple yards away. My ears perk to the sound, wondering where the noise was coming from and I'm pretty sure it was the distinct sound of someone crying.   "I wonder what happened," I say and take a look at the nearby bus stop just down the road, "is that- oh."   I see Harry there actually, sitting with his face planted into his hands. was he the one crying? well, course he is, the boy's got his face inside his small hands and was shaking quite a lot.   "Hey!" I call out, walking my way towards the boy, "Harry?"   The boy looks up then when I got close enough and starts wiping his red face which looked a little funny, a little too red.   "Harry? Hey, love how are you? Why're you here at the bus stop crying?"   Harry shook his head, looking down at his pink strap on shoes that matched his long pink socks. I couldn't help, but take note of the clothes he was wearing today and they made him look quite small and soft, softer than yesterday. he's wearing a pale pink top that didn't really reach his tummy and a tiny white skirt that needed a tiny bit of ironing at the bottom or those were just ruffles. I couldn't really tell from the way he was sitting. his hair was loose too and there was butterfly hairband sitting over his head.   "O-oh hi Louis. shouldn't you be at school now?" Harry asks instead of answering my question.   "Yeah I was going, but I heard you crying love, so I needed to come over and check on you. what happened? why are you at the bus stop." I check the time and see it's fucking 7:45 already and I didn't hit the road as I should have, "the buses are all gone."   "Oh," was all Harry could say before he started to cry again, "Daddy doesn't want to drop me off so he said to wait for the b-bus but, but we did something and I guess I'm late now and I didn't notice. I don't want to be late on my first day!" he started to cry harder and my heart just hurt from the looks of it.   "Hey, hey. Why did daddy say no?"   "Because he said he's tired," Harry mumbles, "Everyone's going to hate me because I'll be late and then I won't make any new friends." He's pretty much bawling now.   Gosh darn it, time is ticking and I'm going to be late to my class too, "Hey, hey come on Harry I'll drop you off since we're going to the same place."   "R-really!?" and I swear he went from crying to cloud 9 of joy in just a split millisecond.   I smile, "Yeah, come on. we need to get going now though if we want to make it in time at all."   "Yay! thank you so much, Louis, this means a lot!" Harry jumps off of the bus stop seat onto his feet and brushes some of the dust off of his bum.   He seems to wince in pain because his lips were sucked into a tight grip from his teeth when he dusted his bum off so I had to ask, "Harry? you okay? you look like you're in pain."   Harry's eyes widen and I took a note of that too, "Y-yes! I fine! I tripped I- in the shower today and hurt myself. Today's just a really bad morning."   "Oh-"   "like always," he whispers that part, though, but I caught it and it made me a bit more suspicious. However, he clearly said that to himself so I didn't want to embarrass him by asking about it.   "Come on now, Harry. Let's go," I walk on and see Harry skipping as we got to my car and god, he's too adorable and it's hurting me. How could this poor boy not have any friends?   "Can I sit in the front, Louis?"   "Yeah, sure! go ahead."   "Thanks so much! daddy hates it when I sit in the front because he says I'm distracting him." Harry mumbles, "but he's just grumpy all the time so I don't want to sit in the front with him anyway." Harry tosses his backpack at the bottom his car and climbs up to the seat, pulling the belt on.   He sure talks a lot of smack about his dad, but I guess every kid does that. it's just that time of age.   "Ready to get to school?"   "Yes!"   ...   Harry sure is excited for his first day at high school since he kept oohing and awing at everything he saw out of my window. I didn't mind the little sounds out of his mouth, it was quite relaxing to hear someone catch the interest of something while driving. I guess that's what happens when you spent most of your years alone and away from your family and siblings for the most of it.   "I'm going to high school today! Gosh, this is so exciting!" Harry cheers, clapping his hands with his curls bouncing along, "I hope to make friends, that's all I really want."   "But the school's for learning, Harry, don't you want to learn new things too?" I ask, just playfully teasing, but Harry gasps like this were some brand new information.   "Oh, my I know that! I almost forgot! thanks for reminding me, Louis! I do want to learn and I want to learn lots and lots of new things."   I chuckle at how child like Harry is, but I don't question it. even if it is kind of strange that he's sixteen yet his speech patterns sounds as though he's seven. then again, who am I to judge how someone acts in social areas?   "What do you think you'll learn?" I ask and I sigh in peace when I notice I've got ten minutes left and we're already at the school's parking area.   "About whatever my teachers teach! I just want to learn and make new friends that way we can all learn together. when I was in middle school no one wanted to work with me so I did all my homework myself which gets really boring. daddy never liked to help me either and some of the stuff gets pretty hard. I try to ask for help from some people, but they say mean stuff to me so I worked by myself. apparently, if I help them or they help me I'll make them sick with my cooties."   Cooties? do kids really still talk about kindergarten stuff like that?   "Cooties? they actually said that?" I asked, the curiosity getting the best of me.   "No, they said meaner stuff. they called me a-" Harry stutters a bit, "you won't get mad if I say it right?"   "Say what?"   " Faggot ." Harry covers his lips with his palms real fast, "Oh no! I said it! I'm so sorry-"   "Harry, it's fine. I know what that word is and you don't mean to hurt anyone you're just informing me, it's okay." I tell him and holy shit, middle schoolers were either extremely immature or knew way too fucking much for their age.   "Did they really call you that?"   "Yes at first it didn't bother me because I didn't know what it meant, but then I searched it up because they kept saying it and it's really mean." Harry mumbles, "I don't see why they called me stuff like that. all the other boys and sometimes teachers called me those things."   Things? so there were more words. well fuck, did he say the teachers too? what kind of shit middle school did Harry go to?   "Oh Harry, I'm so sorry. but, I know what you're feeling. people used to call me that too."   "Oh gosh, they did? why? you're so nice!"   "And you're nice too, Harry. people just like being rude and usually they call us that if they think we're gay and stuff."   "So being gay means faggot?"   "Not quite, Harry. not quite," this boy was pretty clueless if I'm honest, but it suits him.   "What's gay, though?"   "What? Do you not know what that means?"   "No, but I hear it a lot. A lot of people say that to me too. I just forgot to check." Harry says.   "Well, it means you like someone that's of the same gender and nothing more. people tend to associate our preferences with clothing or colors to being a faggot or gay when it's just about who we like," I explain and unbuckle my belt since we made it to the school grounds and finally parked into a good spot, "You get me?"   "Oh. Oh, I think I'm gay."   I swear this boy just says whatever's on his mind.   "Yeah, well, I know I'm gay," I laugh and kind of winced as well because why did I need to drop that information.   "Oh cool! We're both gay then and we're both gay friends," Harry says, "That's so cool. I like boys anyway and girls are icky, but I like their stuff that people say is for girls so. Yeah, I'm gay!"   Well, He seems pretty cheery to be throwing that information out.   "I always knew I liked boys," Harry starts and begins to get out of my car too, latching his backpack onto him, "but I never knew the right word. Guess what, Louis, I made a new friend, you, and learned something new today!" he bounces on his feet and holy shit I swear I'm not looking at a sixteen-year-old, I'm looking at a child, a literal child.   "I'm glad I was able to be part of both things for you, Harry," and really, I am, "Well, get along to the school's office. I know you'll have to get your schedule and I need to get to my class to start everything in- fuck- 5 minutes."   Harry simply nods and comes at me with open arms, "Thanks so much for taking me, Louis! It means a lot!"   I smile in return and accept the loving hug. He's pretty tiny when you get your arms around him, especially his waist and he smells really soft too, like mangoes in a strawberry-banana blend. I think this hug just started my day officially, honestly.   "I'll see you later. If your dad doesn't pick you up, just come to me after school ends and I'll take you home, okay?"   "Okay, Louis!"   "Oh and love," I need to make sure to tell him this since it's a school setting and I really don't want people to question things since no one else knows we're neighbors anyway, "It's Mr. Tomlinson on school grounds."   The boy smiles, not questioning the information given, "Oh! Okay, bye, Mr. Tomlinson!"   "Bye, Harry!" ***** SIX ***** ***** SIX ***** HARRY STYLES mr. tomlinson's so nice to me, oh my goodness. he's already my best friend, at least to me he is. i remember seeing movies where you're someone's best friend because you ate at their house, talk, and also drive around with them and in just two days we did all of those things! so louis is definitely my best friend. daddy got mad when i tried to wake him up this morning after i ate some cereal. he was really mad because i shouldn't ever wake him up when he's sleeping, but today's the first day of school! he said last night after he touched me that he'll take me to school, but i guess he was lying because he hit my face really hard with his hand. it hurt so much this time because i didn't close my mouth and it burned when he hit it and my cheeks got really red. it's okay though, because mr. tomlinson saved the day! he brought me to school today and we talked about some stuff too so that's pretty cool! it feels really nice to be able to talk to someone that isn't daddy and it's super cool to drive around with someone else too. well, it's time for high school. i gulp a little because i'm nervous, really nervous. this school's a lot bigger than my last one which means more students which also means i'll either make a lot of friends or a lot of enemies. i look around and find the registration desk and walk towards it with my hands tight around my backpack straps, i'm just super nervous about getting to my first class and luckily everyone gets a grace period of thirty minutes to find their classes and stuff so i'm actually here at the perfect time. i walk in and see a lot of other students looking at their schedules and no one seemed to have noticed me yet. i'm not sure if i'm happy or sad about that, though. "e-excuse me?" there's an old looking lady with way too many wrinkles on her face sitting behind the counter, she looks down at me and smiles. "hello, little girl, what can i do for you?" i don't bother to correct her because she'll probably realize i'm not a girl anyway and the mistake doesn't bother me either. it just annoys me when daddy says it. "i-i need my schedule please?" "sure, love, what's your name?" "harry, harry styles." she looks at me like i grew two heads and i look down quickly because her creepy face started to get to me, "oh, you're a boy?" "u-um yes." "hm, interesting." was all she says and i'm a little surprised, usually other people had more mean things to say, "well, here's your schedule." and hands me a piece of paper. "t-thank you." "just get to class, freak." she said it in a small voice, i think i'm not supposed to hear it, but i did and i'm already starting to feel sad. it kind of feels like middle school again, and the day just started. "whatever, harry. don't let it bother you. it's a new day, new school!" and i flip the paper in my hands to check the schedule and my eyes widen from excitement because oh my gosh! i have arts and english with mr. tomlinson! this just had to be one of my luckiest days ever. i'll get to see my best friend and learn something new everyday! i just hope i get to make more friends today too, that's all i want. i check my schedule again since time was almost running out and we needed to get to our first class. "ugh, it's math." who takes math in the morning? that's awful and boring! so many stupid numbers and apparently the ABC's are in it too. i thought it was math? since when did english get into it? ugh, whatever. "alright everyone! class is about to start in 5 more minutes! please get to your designated rooms now!" the lady from the desk yelled. "oh gosh! class!" ♥ after running around from room to room and getting weird looks, i finally found my classroom and it's near the end of the first floor of the building. ugh, it's so far from my other classes too, how annoying. my paper says that the teacher is mr. grimshaw and that he teaches pre algebra or something for freshmen. i'm not too good at math, so i guess this math is actually pretty... bad. for like dumb people. yikes. i think i came a little bit close to being late because so much of the room was already filled up and a lot of the people there were looking at me really weird too. i walk in with red cheeks, not sure what to expect and decided to take the empty seat right at front near some boy with brown hair. he looked pretty big and it kind of scared me a little, but i didn't say anything. i could feel everyone still staring at me and it's starting to weird me out, i'm scared it's going to be like middle school all over again, but i'm trying really hard not to expect the worst, but... "hey!" i shake a little in surprise when the brown haired boy looked right back at me and is he actually talking to me? "u-uh, hi?" i say, just in case. "i'm liam!" the boys says, "and you are?" "i-i'm harry," he seems pretty nice so far. "nice name! nice to meet you," he holds out a hand and i'm not sure if i should shake it, i kind of look around a little more just in case there's something he's hiding to hurt me with, but he looks clean and i touch his hand which feels really warm and nice. "nice to meet you too, liam." "say, i really like your outfit." oh no, he brought up my outfit. he's either going to say something really mean right after or he's actually being nice and i am pretty sure he'll do something mean. i was ready to just jump off my seat and sit somewhere else just in case, but liam didn't say anything else. he was just smiling at me. "t-thank you." "i'm actually new here and i don't know much about this city, but i have a cousin and he reminds me of you! he likes to wear dresses and please don't stress out so much. i could literally feel the tension off of you," liam laughs, it's a pretty one, "i honestly like the outfit." "oh, thank you very much then," god is answering my prayers today! liam's actually really nice! "want to meet up at lunch? i'm pretty much alone anyway," he chuckles and i think he's blushing, but i didn't say anything. "sure! i would love to!" i said and oh my gosh this is the first time i'll ever sit with someone else at school, this really is a good day. "alright cool!" just then the teacher of the class, mr. grimshaw made it into the class and asked for everyone's attention, i guess it's time to learn some math! ♥ liam was really nice to me and he invited me to eat lunch with him today. i'm super excited for it because i finally have someone to hang out with and i never had that before. usually the bullies would hurt me when i come into the cafeteria so i always moved away and sat in the hallway where it's quiet to eat my lunch. i also have a class with mr. tomlinson soon too and it's back to back from arts to english so it's going to be a good two hours of my day. i was getting ready to walk to my next class, but i heard some weird whistling from the corner and i didn't really pay attention until i heard someone shout, "the fucking twink is back!" oh no, oh no it's the same boys from middle school and i know their voice really well, too well. i try to pick up the pace and get to class faster, but someone grabs onto my arm before i could run off. oh no, please no, today was going well so far please no. i turn slowly to the source and see the boy i really hate as much as i hate daddy. luke, luke hemmings was the name. he's a horrible bully, super mean and would hurt me for no reason just because i like pink and girly stuff, just because i like boys too. but he's a mean boy, i don't like him. "look boys, it really is harry the fag!" he laughs and ugh there he goes with the name calling. "please stop calling me that." "stop calling me that blah blah, stop being a fag then," luke mocks, "shut up bitch." i cry out in pain when he pushes me to the floor and ouch that really hurt, "you look pretty on the floor like that." he says and that's weird, he never said that to me before and usually daddy says stuff like that. i shiver a little from the thought. the other boys, who were his friends, laughed too. they were all part of his mean crew too and their names were calum, michael, and ashton. i hated them all so much, but i never got to do anything about it. if i complain, no one supports me and then it looks like i lied about everything. so i stopped trying to get them in trouble and took the shoves and beatings they gave me. but then the bell rang and oh toaster strudels, that means i'll be late to my next class. i frown, i didn't want this to happen at all, but at least the mean boys all backed off and rushed away to get to class before someone caught them. i get up to my feet and dust the dirty marks off my white skirt, groaning because of course i'll get pushed around and of course i'll end up ruining my white skirt. thankfully after some rubbing the dust came off and it looks decent again. i already had math, which means it's time for science class and this class is supposed to be biology so it shouldn't be too bad. i like science and it's way better than math, well here goes. ♥ ugh, this whole day's been boring. yeah i was excited at first because of louis and meeting liam, but the classes were so dull. so far, not much bad things happened except for some laughs and fingers pointing at me, but it's been safe so far. seeing the mean boys again did scare me, but i haven't come across them again and it's about to be lunch time again and after that i'll get to see louis again! so suck it up harry and get to lunch! ♥ "i wonder where liam is." i look around and finally my eyes caught liam who's sitting at a bench by himself, munching on the school's sandwich. i never liked school food so i make my own, it saves time too because i don't have to wait in line with all the annoying kids too. "liam!" i rush to the table and excitedly place my lunch bag onto the table. "hey harry! i was wondering where you were." "o-oh i'm sorry did i make you wait too long?" i ask, "i didn't mean to make you wait, i'm so sorry!" "hey, it's no big deal, really. don't worry. i'm just glad you're here anyway. thought you ditched me cause i was weird or something." i giggle, if anyone's weird it's me, "no silly, don't worry i would never think you're weird. besides, everyone's always looking at me like i'm crazy, so i'm sure i win at the 'who's the weirdest' contest." liam smiles fondly at me and he looks so happy too, "you're not weird harry, stop saying that. i think you're cool! my cousin took a while to start dressing like you did because he was scared he'd get hurt or something, but you pull it off real well!" i take the compliment not bothering to throw my sob story at him because dressing up is actually a lot tougher than i thought it would be and being myself is what's more important so i stopped caring about what people think. i just want to make sure i make friends who actually like me for me and not a pretend side. does that make any sense? "thanks liam, that means a lot." "no problem, mate." ***** SEVEN ***** ***** SEVEN ***** LOUIS TOMLINSON   i check my watch a couple of times and wow having to alternate between english and arts was a lot tougher than i thought it'd be and if anything it's kind of stupid. it should've been three straight periods of english and then three straight periods of art, but when has things ever been straight with me? exactly. i guess now's a good time to just look through the attendance sheet rather than stutter like i did the past few periods since it's the first time going through the seating chart and making sure i didn't fuck up with the names. after handling elementary kids, let me tell you now, i was traumatized by the amount of screaming and crying i saw just for pronouncing a name wrong. just a tad of a mistake and they went off. that's why i'm a little relieved i'm teaching high schoolers for the next few years. "okay let's see who's in my class." i rip the tab off the teacher's package the office handed us and checked for today's upcoming period, "these names look easy and- oh." and well look at that, "harry edward styles." looks like harry's in my class too and, "oh he's in my next class too. well that's cool." i smile a little because that boy really did make my day so having him in my class will probably make me feel even better. he's really sweet and it hurts sometimes because i've never seen anyone as sweet as him before so his presence is incredibly relaxing to me." just then the bell rang and woop, looks like it's time for class. i prop the door open and look out to see everyone making their way to their rooms in a rush then head back to take a seat in my chair. that's when my eyes caught harry's who was just entering the room with his arms wrapped around some notebooks tight to his chest. his curls bounced a lot as he skipped his way to a seat and thankfully he took the front row. "hi mr. tomlinson!" harry waves with a huge smile, "how's your day been so far?" "it's been good. yours?" "great and even better now because i'll be in your class for the next two hours and then home!" harry cheers, looking oh so happy in his own place not minding the glaring eyes from his classmates. i want to shout at them for looking at him like that, but that's not my place to say. "good afternoon class." i say walking up to the board to listen down various expectations for this course, "i'll be having most of your for the next two hours so i'll be combing the syllabus for both classes to save time so please pay close attention." everyone looked pretty bored out of their damn minds, but for harry. he was smiling really big, feet kicking the air, and had his hands cupping his face as he watched me deliver my lecture. i don't know why, but i couldn't get the image of him off my mind. for some reason i'm just desperately looking back every few seconds to see harry's face and is it because he's familiar and it helps stabilize my thought process as i teach or? i don't know, but it's kind of concerning. whatever. the boy does look really happy and after seeing him cry this morning, seeing him smile felt so much more relieving and i'm glad his day's been going so well so far. "i hope all of you are ready for your first day in art and english!" i bite my lips to stop a loud snort when i heard the room groan, but for harry's clapping hands. of course he's excited. ♥ "god can this day end already." the two classes moved on quite slow, but i managed to get through thanks to harry's excitement. he wasn't lying when he said he wanted to learn today and he pretty much participated in every question i've asked to the class. i wanted to stop him so i could get the other students to talk, but none of them listened anyway and they'll probably get their ass kicked by their poor grades eventually so. it's literally the first day and i'm already tired of most of the kids i've come across. especially since most of the kids that were in the same class as harry were quite annoyed by harry answering a lot of the questions, which was ridiculous because none of them answered in the first place. i wipe my brow with the back of hand and look at the time again to see it's almost the end of the day and most of the students were occupied with the given starter assignment, so i guess i could relax now. i look back at harry who's happily doodling and writing his heart out onto the paper and i'm kind of excited to check his thoughts on the warm up. the assignment was pretty simple, they were given a paper that talks about a certain fictional genre and they needed to build an argument off of it and explain why they think what they think about the essay. just then, the bell finally rang. "oh thank heavens," i say to myself making sure no one else had heard that because well... then shame on me. "alright class! pencils down, bring up your papers please and place them face down on this table here! i'll be checking them all tonight and don't worry, these will all be given full credit for participation. at least, just for today." i hear the class sigh in relief and jesus christ, are high schoolers really this pathetic that they couldn't simply think or? the kids rush up into a messy pile to drop off their paper while harry seemed to be taking his time to pack up first. hm. the kids clear out soon enough and it's just me and harry. he scuffles as he walks up to my desk, gently placing the paper down with the rest. "um- mr. tomlinson-" "love, it's after school you can call me louis now." "oh. okay louis. um. remember you said you'll take me home if my daddy won't?" ah yes, i remember that. "yeah. let me guess, daddy's not coming to pick you up?" he nods his head, "i-i'm sorry if it's a bother-" "nonsense! it's not a bother at all. we live next to each other anyway and it's good to save gas too. i'll drop you off." "thank you so much, louis." "hey, what are friends for?" and i swear that's probably the biggest smile i've seen all day. ***** EIGHT ***** ***** EIGHT ***** HARRY STYLES   this day's been so great so far and i couldn't be happier. did i tell you about my new friend liam? if i did, oops i'm telling you again. i got to eat lunch with him and he was so nice to me i couldn't believe it! i actually made two new friends in just two days and that's got to be a new record for someone like me. oh and he even gave me his number and said we should hang out sometimes, isn't that great? i knew it was time to go home when the bell rang, but god i really didn't want to go home. i know daddy's back at home from work since we have the same times, but he's for sure not going to pick me up. i don't think daddy knows i'm at school anyway. mr. tomlinson did say he'll take me home if i needed it and fortunately he said yes. "come on now, harry. i need to lock the classroom up." i quickly grab my bag and rush out the door just as louis pulls the key out from the lock, "i'm ready louis!" i watch him laugh that pretty laugh where his eyes starts to squint and his cheeks look like they hurt from smiling so much, "good." ♥ we're by his car now and much of our things were dumped into the back before we went back into the passenger seating. it's been awhile since i ate lunch and now my tummy's starting to rumble for food. ugh, how annoying. "so how was your day harry?" he asks me while starting up the car and moving out of the parking spot. "it was great!" and it really was, "i made another friend today!" "really?" "yeah! his name is liam. he's really nice and he even gave me his number." "ooo, his number? he must be really interested then." i didn't know what he meant by that but i'm guessing it means liam's really interested to be my friend and i think that's true because liam really was excited about getting to know me so. "he is!" "hm, that's nice." i don't know if it's just me but louis' voice drops all of a sudden and i'm scared i might have said something to annoy him. oh no. "um how about you?" "me?" he takes a left turn through a street and then continues, "pretty average day. talked to students, expected some more from them but didn't get any. but you made my day, harry, answering all those questions like a champ." oh gosh! so he did notice me answering all those questions, i'm glad he did and he's happy about it and i made his day. this is such a good day for me. "i'm glad i made you happy, lou-" just then my stomach made the most ugliest and loudest sound and i quickly wrapped my arms around it to stop it, but it was too late, "um." "someone sounds a bit hungry." louis laughs, "tell you what, there's a bakery just on the way home so let's get something from there yeah?" "sure!" o-m-g. louis' going to take me out to eat at a bakery. there was a movie i watched where these people that were friends went to get food and then they said they liked each other and said some funny stuff to each other and then kissed. they called it a date i think, i wonder if it's like that. "is this a date louis?" i'm curious so i had to ask. i look back at louis and i noticed his hand tighten over the steering wheel, but i think it's to help him with his driving. "w-why do you ask that harry?" "because you are taking me out to eat! i watched a movie and they called it a date." "well dating's for couples, harry. we're friends and you're also my student. we're just two neighbors getting some food to eat. okay?" i couldn't help, but pout, "okay." i twiddled my thumbs a bit, scared that i made louis mad at me, "are you mad at me?" "what? no of course not. you asked a question and i answered so don't worry about it." "are you sure?" "i'm sure harry, really. we're almost there and i'm pretty sure you're hungry, right?" i nod, "yeah." "cool, i heard they had some really good pastries there and i never really tried anything in the city yet so this is going to be fun. have you ever eaten at the bakery there?" "no," i say simply, "daddy never really took me out to eat so." "really? that's pretty disappointing, i guess this going to be a first for the both of us yeah?" "yep!" "cool then, i'm glad." ♥ the bakery place looks really pretty and we finally made into the parking place and got down together. it's nicely decorated and there were floral pots everywhere so it looked kind of like a flower shop, but it's a bakery. there were some tables set out too for people to eat outside and enjoy the flowers and everything smelled pretty and sweet. this is such a nice place i wish daddy took me to these places rather than touch and hurt me back at home. i heard some loud giggling from one of the outer tables and i saw a happy family of three, two parents with their little boy eating ice cream together. it makes me kind of sad because i wish daddy and mummy were still together so we could be a happy family. maybe daddy wouldn't be so mad at me if mummy was still here and would've never touched my princess parts like he does now. "harry? you coming?" oh shoot, i must have been too caught up in my thoughts because louis' already made his way inside the bakery. "coming!" i let him know i'm okay with a jump and a wave and run my way to where louis is. ♥ "oooo i want that one, no that one! oh no i want that one! i want all of them, louis which one should i get?" there were so many pretty pastries i couldn't just pick one it was impossible and mean too. usually when i pick something i try to pick everything because i'm scared i'd make the other stuff mad at me because i didn't pick them. i know how it feels not to get picked for stuff so i didn't want to do that to anyone or anything. that's why daddy never takes me out, i guess, it's cause i keep picking everything instead of one thing. "how about you pick your top three and i'll get those for you." three? holy shizzles, usually daddy yells at me and then drags me out of the room since i wanted more than one of something, but louis' letting me pick three. he really is my best friend. "thank you so much! i want the creamy star one with vanilla filling, the rainbow donuts with sprinkles, and the ice cream. i'll eat the ice cream and keep the other pastries for later, is that okay louis?" "yeah that's fine," says louis and he starts asking the funny looking lady behind the register to pack the pastries and serve up the ice cream. "aw what a cute little boy, is he your son?" i giggle at the fact that she thought i was louis' son, that's so funny because that means louis' just super old. "ah no, he's my neighbor's boy. his tummy was rumbling so i decided to get him some pastries before i drop him off back home." "that's quite sweet of you, here you little one. what's your name?" i take the bag from her and get the ice cream with my other hand, "thank you so much and my name's harry. harry styles." "i love your skirt as well and what a lovely name for a lovely face, come again soon!" she says and i wave her a good bye as i follow louis out the door, licking away at my vanilla ice cream. i know i have to get home to daddy soon and it makes me sad, but today's been a good day so i hope things will get better with him too. i really hope so. "let's head on home then?" louis asks. "yeah, let's."   ***** NINE ***** ***** NINE ***** LOUIS TOMLINSON maybe getting harry that ice cream wasn't such a good idea. it really wasn't. he sitting in my passenger seat with the bag of pastries tight in one hand while holding the ice cream with the other. he keeps licking it like a cat and you could literally hear the sounds of him licking the cone excessively. i try my best to drown out the noise, but it's pretty hard when it's literally right there. "you're really liking that ice cream cone." he looks at me and smiles really big, "i do! it's really good. thank you so much for getting it for me. do you want me to pay you back? i have some money in my piggy bank." i swell a little from the loving gesture harry gave and told him it's no big deal, "nah harry. think of it as a gift from me." "okay!" he the continues to lick away the cone and i get ready to head on back home. it really was a nice first day when it comes down to it and i'm glad to have made harry happy. i'm driving through the streets and maybe i did let my thoughts wander a bit in accordance to harry. he mentioned liam earlier, another student, and i should be happy for harry that he made a new friend, but for some weird reason it didn't sit well with me when i said he was interested, like really interested and harry just blatantly says yes. is it because this liam actually wants more from harry? and who is this liam? is he nice? harry says he's nice, but what if he's got a trick up his sleeves? and why the hell am i asking all these questions- "louis!" harry shouts and i freak out when i see a car right in front of me and i hit the brakes real fast before i could slam at the back of the other's man's car. "shit." i whisper, making sure harry doesn't hear or he'll reprimand me for it. fortunately none of us hit anything, "harry are you- oh god." i look back at harry who's sitting there awkwardly with the ice cream cone in his hand while the rest of the cream was splattered all over his face. "harry-" the boy, though, suddenly just bursts out giggling, "this is a weird way to eat ice cream," he chuckles and starts scraping the cream out of his face, and- oh lord stop this. he's literally licking it off his fingers, he's licking that white substance off his fucking fingers right in front of my face. it looks so much like, no louis stop it. he's a bloody sixteen year old, keep your old ass where it belongs. in the same section where normal minds reside. "um harry." "hm?" he looks at me with his bright green eyes and narrowed lips around his fingers, "what." "y-you've got a little um ice cream like all o-over your face." the boy just giggles again. oh god just kill me now. "i know don't worry i'm getting it off. i'm used to stuff like this cause daddy-" i watch his eyes grow wide and he pauses for a bit and i'm a little scared by how scared he looked, but, "d-daddy would like sometimes make my face u-um messy with uh. m-milk before uh breakfast and i clean it u-up like this. so the mess doesn't bother me." uh. okay? don't see why harry had to pause like that to say that, but okay. i'm not going to question it. um. "okay." "s-sorry i had a bit of a brain freeze." harry says. "sure you did." "honest." "okay, let's just get you home okay?" he nods quietly and carries on with wiping away the ice cream from his face. ♥ "hey harry is that your dad?" we made it back to harry's place, but there's a man standing out in front of harry's porch with his arms crossed and face pulled into a really grouchy look. that man wasn't ugly and had a nice built to his body so i'm a little skeptical that he's harry's dad, but harry gasps all of a sudden and look to see harry pouting with hands tightening around his bag of pastries. "yes, louis." he mumbles. oh then i guess i was wrong, that is harry's dad. weird. "okay, well i'll park up in front of your driveway to drop you off. need any help to get your stuff down?" i ask. he shakes his head no and i take note of how his preppy mood just changed all of a sudden and before i let harry head out i grab at his wrist, "are you okay?" "um, yeah louis. i'll see you tomorrow at school." he says simply and heads on out and grabs his bag from the back of my trunk and walks kind of slow to where his dad was standing, just glaring at him. well. okay. "see you harry!" i say, but he doesn't reply and instead makes it back into the quiet home incredibly fast, "well then." ♥ it's around 12 a.m. and i should get some sleep, but i couldn't seem to catch the sand man tonight and instead i'm watching, or should i say scrolling, through some shows on netflix just clicking away... bored. there's nothing much to do yet since it's just the first week of school and there hasn't been anything given at least not enough to read through. i need to read through those short write ups i made the students do this morning, but honestly do i look like i want to do that after a pretty dull day with those kids? yeah no and i left them home too so. i look at the clock and it's almost 1 and i might as well hit the sack or i'll surely fuck shit up tomorrow. i was about to tuck myself away into the comfort of my bed, but i stop and drop the blanket from my fingertips when i heard distant screaming coming from... next door. "what the hell?" there's shouting clearly coming from the house next door and to be more specific, i mean harry's house. it's muffled screaming, but it's definitely screaming and i walk over to my window where the noises are coming though and push away the blinds a bit. i sigh, annoyed since it was pointless cause all of the windows next door were closed shut. well fuck. the shouting stopped, though, but i have a weird gut feeling i should ask harry about it tomorrow because those shouts were a little worrisome and it sounded a lot like a little boy's scream. and i couldn't help, but think about harry and worry whether he's okay or not. ***** TEN ***** ***** TEN ***** HARRY STYLES   i ended up making daddy mad again last night and he was really mad. i don't understand why, though, because i thought he wanted me to make friends with mr. tomlinson for him anyway. but when i came home with mr. tomlinson he looked at me with such angry eyes, i couldn't even look back at him. i knew that that night was going to hurt again and i was right. daddy had a belt this time and it was one of those things from his pants. he said i've been naughty, very naughty, but i thought i was doing good so far so i didn't understand. daddy kept saying i kept being a naughty girl for other boys but the only boy i talked to was liam and daddy doesn't know about liam. but then he started to say i was being bad because i let mr. tomlinson touch me and even though i kind of wouldn't mind that idea, i never let him touch me so why was daddy saying all these fake things? as soon as i got home yesterday daddy shut the door and yanked me by my hair and dragged me upstairs. he took off most of clothes and tossed my backpack and pastries to the side. he got mad because he said he went to pick me up at school today, but i wasn't there. that was weird because i was pretty sure daddy didn't want to get me if he didn't drop me off in the first place. stupid daddy. daddy said i was naughty so he told me to stay on the bed naked until he gets back with his punishment stuff. this time it was bad for sure when brought his belt with him. i never saw him use that before so i was scared, very scared. he tied me to the bed and said some more mean things and touched my privates and chest a lot, then slapped me a couple of times. i was just happy i didn't have any homework because i wouldn't have had time to finish it because of daddy hitting me all night. it started to hurt even more when he slapped me with the belt all over my bum, not stopping for a second. i think my bum was bleeding but i couldn't see because i couldn't stretch from daddy holding my face down. he got tired of my screaming after and then he tied my mouth with my panties and said bad girls like me probably like doing stuff like this, but i don't. i promise i don't. it's so yucky, who puts their panties in their mouth? that's so gross. i cried a lot last night and now it's the next morning and i'm so tired. daddy didn't let me move from the bed either so he's also sweaty, naked, and lying on top of me and i could barely breathe. but it's another school day and i really wanted to see liam and louis today because they're my friends and they make me forget about my daddy at home even if i shouldn't. my bum burns and stings a lot, but i managed to get out of the bed quietly and washed up, got dressed, made lunch for today, and finished my breakfast. today i hoped to look a little better since there were some bruises all over my neck and tummy so i couldn't wear my favorite crop tops or shorts. instead i put on some light blue overalls with a long white turtleneck sweater underneath. daddy says i should keep the marks, but if i show it then i'll be in big trouble. i was going to use mummy's makeup but i only have a little more left and i use it for my face instead to hide the red stuff. well daddy's obviously not going to drop me off today so instead i'll have to ask mr. tomlinson again and i'm actually glad. quickly, i grab my things and try not to make my pained walking too obvious as i locked the door and walked down my white steps, running to louis' door. i feel bad, a little bit for bothering louis like this and i'm scared he'll get sick of me for it but hey when did nice things ever last for me? this shouldn't be a surprise if it all ends again. "hello? mr. tomlinson?" i knock on the door a little harder. i thought he might have left, but his car from yesterday is still here. "coming!" i hear and i smile to myself, thank goodness he's still here. i see him quickly open the door, "who is- oh. hey! harry how are you little sport?" i giggle a bit and shake my head, "i don't like sports, mr. tomlinson. i like dolls." "i didn't mean-" louis sighs and then laughs, "never mind, come in. we have a few more minutes before we need to leave so i'm eating some breakfast. do you want anything?" "nope. i wanted to ask if it's okay for you drop me off again today? i'm sorry if it's bothersome-" "hey, it's no problem. does daddy not want to take you again?" louis asks. i shake my head and frown. daddy never takes me to the places i need, but i go everywhere he wants and sometimes those places can be really bad. i hate daddy and i hate his friends. but they all hurt me so much more if i don't listen. ugh, why am i even thinking about them that's a story for another day. "that's fine i'm happy to take you and i'm glad i can too, car rides are boring when you're alone." louis says. "oh. i make them not boring?" "you sure do, harry. a good boy you are." i feel my cheeks buzzing when he said that and i don't know why but it's itchy. daddy says the same thing sometimes, but it gives me a bad feeling like i'm sad and that there's something bad that's going to happen. but when mr. tomlinson says it i feel good, like really good. weird. isn't that weird? "say harry." louis says and gets into the car, buckling his seat belt just like i did, "before i forget there's something i wanted to ask actually." "oh, what is it?" "around 1 a.m. this morning i heard a lot of screaming coming from your house, is everything okay?" uh oh. ***** ELEVEN ***** Chapter Notes See the end of the chapter for notes ***** ELEVEN ***** LOUIS TOMLINSON   i needed to know and i sure don't want to forget asking harry about it. the screams were loud, but they were gone just as quick. the sounds continued to rattle in my head and i don't think i'll be at peace until i find out what was going on that early in the morning. harry, on the other hand, looked a bit shocked that i even asked such a question and looked back at me his wide eyes. i couldn't help, but take note of his pretty green eyes glistening in the early morning light, they really are pretty. jesus christ, louis, what am i thinking?! "um. w-what screams?" he asks. ugh. okay, here he goes with being clueless about it. you see, i would be embarrassed if it turns out the sounds were from somewhere else and i was just bothering harry about it for no reason, but i am 100% positive those screams were coming from the styles' home. "sounds of, like, bloody murder for a couple of minutes," i tell him, "and i'm sure you heard it since it was coming out of your house." "i-i don't know what you mean-" harry's starting to stutter a bit more and his breathing quickens as well, fuck. "hey, calm down. i just wanted to know, you don't have to tell me if you can't-" "n-no. um. but then you'll think something is wrong. um. daddy and i were playing a game and i hurt myself so i screamed." harry mumbles, staring at his lap while twiddling his little fingers together. my eyes narrow a bit at the response, "are you sure?" i ask and start the car up for our departure, "so that screaming was you? why'd you lie and say you didn't know what the screaming was?" seriously, something's weird about all this. "b-because i thought um." he's deep in thought for a second and as a man who's much more experienced in life, it's pretty obvious he's trying to cook up a lie, "t-that you'll think i-i'm stupid for um screaming because i stubbed my toe." yeah, sure. you stub your toe, and okay fine i agree it can hurt real fucking bad, but that scream that sounded like sheer terror does not sound like something you'd hear from a toe injury. harry's for sure lying to me, but what if he's not? what if his intense crying was in fact caused by hurting his toe? he is pretty curious and bloody soft, so he probably does take minor pains as something detrimental for him. "harry if something else happened you can tell me okay-" "nothing else happened louis! i was playing with daddy and then i hurt myself! that's it! can we talk about something else?" woah shit someone got a bit defensive there, but he's right i guess. i don't want to kill his mood especially since it's the morning. "okay sorry, sorry. fine let's talk about something else then. what do you hope you can achieve in these next few years in high school?" "i want a boyfriend." "okay- wait what. harry, what?" wait what. what did harry just say? i'm sure to be hearing things. honestly what the hell- "i want a boyfriend." this little sixteen year old who's barely starting his first year in high school could not be possibly thinking about getting a relationship. no way. what in the world. i mean, yeah i've seen young people get into deep shitty relationships but harry is way too young and his mind set's even younger. how on earth could he be thinking about getting a bloody boyfriend?! "uh. um. what?" harry huffs impatiently and looks at me like i'm stupid, "i said i want a boyfriend!" "oh so i'm not hearing things. why do you want a boyfriend exactly? i expected something like 'more friends' or 'become the smartest kid' but a boyfriend?!" i'm honestly mind blown right now. "having a boyfriend looks fun and i want one." harry says and then his voice drops where i could just barely hear him say, "and i just want someone to love me for real." i look to the side for a quick second to see harry frowning while picking at a loose string sticking out of his overalls. why's this boy got to make me feel a certain kind of way, it's killing me a bit. "what do you mean? who gave you that idea?" "no one did i just see it a lot and like i'm happy i have a friend and you're a great friend but i want like also someone who is not just a friend and is also a boy." "so a... boyfriend." "yes! because like i want to do all those thing where you can't do with friends and i want to do them with someone i actually like because i really hate dad-" harry does that weird thing again where he's about to mention someone and then cuts himself off so fast like he's going to bring hell fire if he says it. "uh, harry?" "i-i mean. i just. i want someone to love and someone to love me back." harry mumbles. "hey, people do love you. you don't need a boyfriend for that. you have your friends, me, your dad." i think i see him flinch at the mention of his dad, but maybe i'm just imagining things... "um. but you can't do stuff with those people, louis. like the stuff you do with your mouth." okay, for a fucking second there i thought he was talking about a bloody blow job and i nearly swerved the car into a lamp post, but then it dawned to me that harry's a cherubic innocent ass angel and he's probably talking about fucking kissing. "d-do you mean kissing, harry," i ask. and well motherfuck, i'm stuttering. "yes. kissing," he giggles, "i want to do all that stuff with a boy i can hold hands with and do stuff like in those movies. the only person i've kissed is my daddy." harry scrunches his nose up all funny in distaste when he mentions- "you kiss your dad?" yeah, i just had to ask that, whoops. harry started to do that weird huffy breathing again then says, "um. yeah. he's my daddy so like i care about him." if anything it sounds a little force because if there's anything to take note about harry, it's that he's super preppy when he's into something and talks about it like it's the only thing that matters. but the way he just mentioned his dad sounds far from something preppy and cheerful. i guess there's a lot about harry i don't know much about yet. "oh look, we're here." and we are actually, i make my way through the entrance of the teacher's parking area and retrieved my spot closest to the school again and quickly shut the engine off. "thank you, mr. tomlinson, for dropping me off again." harry says and makes his way to get out of my car. but, "harry," i grab at his wrist and gasp when harry squeals out in... pain? "harry?!" "ouch!" harry cries out, yanking his wrist back and holding it against his chest, "ouchie!" "harry! what happened? shit-" "don't cuss, mr. tomlinson-" i roll my eyes, "oh forget that, what happened? did i hurt you? i just wanted to remind you that if you need a lift again just tell me again after class. what happened to your wrists? are they hurting?" and holy shit was i throwing out questions quicker than ever. "s-sorry, mr. tomlinson. i didn't mean to scare you. just a little sore." harry mumbles. sore? what the. from what? "from what?" "n-nothing." god damm it, i hate it when people aren't telling the truth when it's obvious they can't lie for shit. "harry-" "i need to go! i'll see you in class later!" he shouts and i watch the boy attempt to run out of the parking lot, but oddly enough fails and instead speed walks with a limp. well, that's strange.... Chapter End Notes Another chapter, been busy and stressed and almost forgot about this story I had. I still have many chapters to upload that were pre written (unfortunately unedited because I'm very busy as I said) so I will most likely update this every day from here on until I reach the last chapter I wrote for which I need to reread this remember where I left off and then continue it. I've been getting better so I forgot about this story, but thanks for the constructive feedback it makes me want to finish it through :) ***** TWELVE ***** ***** TWELVE ***** HARRY STYLES   louis asks too many questions and i like him, i do, but it's getting on my nerves. especially since it keeps making me say stuff about daddy when i shouldn't. i sigh out a little in frustration because i keep slipping out stuff i really shouldn't and then i get all nervous when louis asks about it. gosh, i'm so annoying and i don't mean to but i just can't help it. i look at the large clock and see it's almost time for class and quickly head to my new assigned locker to grab my textbooks. the first class of the day is math, by the way and i was a bit annoyed by it before, but yesterday was a really nice day in his class. mr. grimshaw's class isn't as bad as i thought it would be because he's actually super cool and said he won't be too hard, but enough for us to learn. i was really relieved because then i won't have to worry so much on math because math is such an awful subject for me. i just can't believe the ABC's are now considered math, that's insane! i thought letters only belonged in english, but i guess not. i was making my way to my first class and then i hear someone call my name and oh no please don't let it- "harry!" i turn around, scrunching my eyes closed just in case and slowly open them to see liam running up to me and oh, "hey liam!" okay good i thought it was either the mean boys or louis. "hey! good morning. you heading to math?" "um yes! are you?" "well yeah silly, that's why i'm here." liam laughs, "i wanted to ask if you want to, like, walk together?" o-m-g. "u-um yeah!" i tighten my hand around my books in slight giddiness because wow liam wants to walk with me to class. we're both walking side by side to get to class when suddenly liam asks me a question, "oh hey, by the way i tried to text you but it said i couldn't deliver any messages and then i tried calling but you never picked up." "y-you tried texting me?" oh no, i remember exchanging numbers with him yesterday, but i forgot to tell him it was my home phone because i don't have a cellphone, "i-i'm sorry i should've told you i don't have a cellphone." "oh? then what number did you give me?" "my home phone. i'm sorry." "hey no need to apologize, it's cool. aw why don't you have a cellphone?" i wanted to tell him it's because my daddy believes that the only person i need to keep contact with is him so i won't need a phone since i come home to him everyday anyway. i think that's a stupid reason, but i can't tell liam because daddy said it'll get me in trouble. "i guess i just never really needed one. i never had any friends who gave me their numbers," and that wasn't a lie either. that's why i thought daddy was right when he said i only need to keep contact with him because let's be honest, i wouldn't have has any phone numbers to put in the phone in the first place! liam makes a sad face and doesn't say anything else since we already made it to class and took our spots. ♥ the day went on like it was yesterday and surprisingly none of the mean boys bothered me today. probably because the school is pretty big so it's hard to see people from middle school here. i couldn't have been more happier to not see those annoying bullies as much. liam said he made another new friend and that he wants to sit with us during lunch too. i got really nervous because what if his new friend doesn't like me? what if i make him really upset with my face? what if liam likes him better and then liam will leave me for his other friend because he doesn't like me? ugh my head is hurting from all the thinking. lunch is about to start soon so i'll have to be ready for it. just take deep breaths harry, i'm sure everything's going to be fine. deep breaths. the bell rings and finally it's lunch time. i made sure to write in my pink notebook all of the new homework assignments i have to do, but so far it's just reading and more reading and a little bit of math work. i'm a little worried though, because if i go home daddy's sure to bother me and then i wouldn't be able to finish my stuff. but daddy got mad yesterday since i didn't let him pick me up so does this mean he'll pick me up today? i guess so... ugh i liked driving around with mr. tomlinson better. well, maybe to get some things i'll have to break rules. daddy can wait outside, i don't care. i'll go home with mr. tomlinson instead. "harry!" i look up to see who's calling my name and then my eyes spot liam who's sitting in the same spot like yesterday but this time with someone new. i'm a little scared, but i get my lunch box out and make my way to the table. "hi liam and-" i look at the boy next to liam and looks kind of chubby. he's really white too and has really bright hair. his eyes were blue like mr. tomlinson's but i think mr. tomlinson has prettier eyes than this boy, "who are you?" i didn't mean to sound rude if i did, i'm just honestly curious. "oh! this is niall! niall, this is harry." "hey! liam wasn't lyin' when he called you cute- ow!" i watched niall cradling his arm after liam suddenly elbowed his chest, but... "c-cute? you guys think i'm cute?" "y-yeah." i feel my face start to burn and i could see liam's going a little red also, "sorry if that weird you out." "no! thank you oh my goodness this is the first time anyone called me cute that isn't my daddy or anyone that's from outside of school. this means a lot to me, thank you liam and thank you niall." niall stares at me with his big eyes and then he says, "aw you're so fucking adorable, mate. love your overalls too. have a seat!" "oh! right!" i slide into the bench part and carefully take my spot, trying my best not to make a weird face because my bum is still stinging a bit from yesterday, "owie." i mumble, but not too loud or else liam and niall might ask me stuff and i already know i can't lie to save my life. "say, i heard someone's throwing a get together party for the freshies. are you guys going?" niall asks, "because i am, but i don't know anyone else but you two for now so it'll be awkward to go alone." parties? i never got invited to a party before so i have no idea what those are like and i don't think daddy would let me go either. i continued to listen to liam and niall who were thinking about whether going or not and liam seems to agree that he'll go. "are you going to go, harry?" liam asks and oh dear how do i answer this. "i-i don't know. am i invited?" "it's open for anyone who's freshman, just show your id card and then you're in!"  niall says. oh, that sounds nice, "oh, but um i don't think i'm going." "aw why not?" liam whines and then he's munching on his weird looking school burger, "you should go with us harry! we'll have a lot of fun and get to know each other better too. besides, it's our first event in high school ever! you don't want to miss out on that!" that's true it sounds really interesting and i do want to go so i'd look cool because cool kids go to parties a lot, at least that's where all the awesome middle schoolers went to. they would talk about it non-stop after the next day and i'm always the one that's sitting outside of the discussion because i never went to any party. i was just never invited to them. "b-but my daddy won't let me go." and that's the full truth, daddy would probably throw a fit. "well, the party's like later in the night. try to sneak out maybe?" niall asks, "if not, liam and i can wait for you outside and we'll give you the ride to the party. we can like help you sneak out if you can't do it yourself." sneak out? that sounds... naughty. i kind of like it if it means staying away from daddy. "um, okay. i think we can do that. when is the party?" i ask. "in just a couple of days. it's this friday night and it'll go over until saturday morning, but we could leave whenever we want to if needed." i hope so because i don't think i could stay away from daddy that long. he would probably notice because sometimes daddy comes into my room to play with me and if i'm not there when he checks, oh i'm in big trouble. but at least i'll have a break from daddy if it's from night to morning... "okay i'll sneak out. it's friday night so my daddy sleeps earlier than usual to catch up on sleep. um, do i give you my address?" "yeah, here-" liam pulls out a loose piece of paper from his backpack and hands it to me, "write the address on here and we'll be there around 7:00 pm. make sure to like check your windows or doors at that time since we can't call you or text you." niall looks confused, "why can't we call or text him?" "i don't have a cell phone," i say. "oh, aw what a bummer. that's cool though, we'll just do what liam says." "so it's settled! niall? harry? you ready for our first ever party as friends?" i smile at the part where he says friends because now that means niall and i are friends and now i have liam, niall, and louis as good friends. it makes me feel really happy even if it isn't such a big deal. i clap my hands together and kick the air, "yes!" ♥ i told liam and niall goodbye and we also hugged for a little bit after lunch before i had to get to mr. tomlinson's class. it felt really nice to get a hug from the both of them and liam kept cradling me and laughed because he said i was so small. i felt a lot of pain when he squeezed me because my back still hurts from daddy's hands last night, but i tried not to make it obvious. i don't want to ruin any of the two boys' joy and make them worry because of my stupid daddy. anyway it's time to go to mr. tomlinson's class and so i made sure to put away any work i would not need into my locker and took my english and art books instead. the hallways were pretty empty right now so i hope to make it to class without any trouble and thankfully i did. i guess when you're in high school with so many people there really isn't much time to hurt and bully people. i haven't seen luke or his friends lately so yesterday is hopefully the last time i'll see those meanies. i made it to louis' classroom and saw him standing by the door, propping it open like he always does when it's time for people to get into their classes. "hello, mr. tomlinson!" "hello there harry how were things today? i hope they were all good?" he asks me and we both enter the class as the other students started to take their seats too. "yes i made another friend named niall today too and i got some homework now so school as actually starting to get serious." louis smiles at me and nods, "indeed it is little one, now take your seat okay? class is about to start." "okay, louis!" ♥ i sat from my seat with my chin propped against my hands just watching louis teach. one of my favorite things about sitting in the front is i get to see louis up close for two whole hours, watching him just talk and talk. he looks really handsome too with his button up shirt and black pants. sometimes i can't believe i got to be friends with someone as amazing as him. but i need to be careful, though, i keep telling him things that i shouldn't be saying and then he starts to ask me so questions. but i really want to tell someone about daddy even if it makes daddy mad or in trouble. daddy said to me one time that he would go away, but daddy never lets his kitten stay alone so he'll send me away to one of his friends. but his friends are also super mean and they hurt me just as much as daddy does. there's also three of them and they share a house together too. i already have to deal with daddy alone so if he goes away and i have to stay with the three of them, ugh i get so many chills when i think about it. daddy says it's nice to share his pretty princess kitten around because they sometimes give him money and i still don't think that's a good thing even if he makes a lot of money sometimes. but maybe mr. tomlinson can keep a secret. if he can pinky promise me and not tell anyone then i can tell him about daddy and then i can ask him to help me with the purple dots on my body because i'm starting to run out of makeup and i can't buy more from the store. i don't get why these liquidy things are so expensive when water is literally just one dollar. and water is something you drink or you'll die so shouldn't that cost more money? whatever, maybe science can explain that stuff i don't know too much. louis gave us some work to do and i happily worked through the english questions and noticed it's almost time to go home. i really don't want to go home because then i have to deal with daddy again and he's so annoying. i could barely sit at home in peace and then he comes home asking me to clean up the dishes, do the chores, and then sit on his lap to do all that nasty stuff only boyfriends are supposed to do. at least, that's what all the movies show. i never saw any of the kids' daddies touch their little boys so why does daddy do that to me? he says it's cause mummy isn't there for him, but there were some kids in the movies with no mummies and only daddies and their daddies just get a new mummy. so much thinking makes my head hurt so i guess it's not that important. daddy's stupid anyway maybe he just doesn't know how to get another mummy. "harry?" oh louis' calling me, "yes, mr. tomlinson?" "the bell just rang and the class is practically empty. please turn your assignment in and then we can leave. is your dad picking you up today or not?" louis asks. "o-oh." oh shoot everyone did leave, "i-i'm sorry i was just thinking and my mind just kind of got carried away." "it's no problem, is your dad coming?" "um." i think he is, but i don't want to go home with him. i really don't, "n- no. can you take me again today? i'm sorry if it's a bother, mr. tomlinson." i pack my stuff up quickly and drop the papers louis gave us into the return bin. "like i said, it's no problem. come on then let's go yeah?" louis' jangling his keys again in the middle of his nice hands and prepares to lock the door, "want to grab a snack again like yesterday?" oh yeah, the pastries. i frown a little because i never got to eat the ones from yesterday because daddy was mad and i had to spend the whole day with him. if anything it might be the same again because daddy's probably going to be waiting for me again and i won't be there for him to pick me up but... i don't even care. "n-no um, louis?" "yeah?" i follow louis as he finally shuts the door and starts to walk. "is it okay if i can stay and do some homework at your house? i don't understand some of the math mr. grimshaw gave today and do you think you can help me?" i hope louis knows his math he should right? he's a teacher, but he teaches english and arts only so what if he says no- "yeah that's fine. shouldn't you ask your dad first and let him know you'll be at my place?" i shake my head i could care less what daddy wants. if he gets really angry then he'll punish me later. he probably will forget and drink his stupid juice anyway and then i won't be in trouble any more. i'm just tired of staying with daddy all the time and this time i have a friend like louis so i can stay away for a little bit unlike last time i was forced to stay home all the time because there really was no place for me to go or to hide. just home alone with daddy. it was horrible. "oh thanks so much louis!" "then let's get on home then. i'll cook us up something and i've managed to put in most of my furniture anyway so it's not as messy like last time," louis laughs again and it makes me laugh too. i don't know why, but just seeing louis like this makes me feel happier and free. i really like louis, i really do and i'm so glad i could call him my friend. ***** THIRTEEN ***** ***** THIRTEEN ***** LOUIS TOMLINSON   i'm not annoyed that harry's asked me to pick him up and drop him off for the past two days, but i am annoyed that harry's father seems to ignore his responsibilities. responsibilities where he should be getting his ass up to take harry to school rather than to have some neighbor, he didn't properly meet yet might i add, to depend on these things. now don't take it the wrong way, i do admire harry and having him sit here with me as we make our daily short travels and i do get my daily dose of surprise from the boy whenever he speaks, so i have no problem with that. it's just harry's dad is a little weird and i think it's time i do some digging of my own while i have the chance. it also looks like harry's going to be staying over with me to do his homework. to outsiders that's awfully inappropriate to have a little sixteen year old over at some thirty year old's house who's also his teacher, but i knew harry slightly before i'd known he'd be my student. our friendship's already been established beforehand so there's not much we can do about it. "so what homework do you have and how much of it?" i ask, just to make some conversation. "i have some math, some biology, some english, and some- i think that's it! i just feel worried about math. i never liked numbers and now there are letters with numbers and it's so annoying." he pouts all silly and i couldn't help but chuckle at the extreme innocence harry's giving off along with his hate for math. "lucky for you, i'm also pretty decent at math at least for your levels. i'll help you out, love. don't worry about it." harry looks all giddy again and he's clapping his hands together, "thanks you so much, louis. that means a lot to me. finally help on math. most of the time in middle school i had to ask help from the creepy library people and they barely helped me because they didn't like me and thought i was annoying." he says such things so easily it kind of scares me a bit, how hurt was this boy in middle school? "oh. well i promise i won't be like your creepy librarians and i'll do my best to help you okay? then we can do your english together too since i'm pretty much the one who assigned it to you." harry's happy by the suggestions and he's kicking his feet like he always does when he's happy about something. at least that's what i've been noticing. "you're so nice, mr. tomlinson. this is the most anyone's ever done for me." "don't mention it, i'm glad to help you out harry. thanks for being a great neighbor and new friend too. i still have yet to meet new people, but i'm happy to have met you first." "you should be friends with mr. grimshaw. he's nice too and he's my math teacher." i furrow my brows at the suggestion, "maybe, harry, maybe." personally, i don't want to make friends with people from the campus. if picking and dropping harry off becomes a routine, it'll be difficult to explain to teachers who'll attach themselves to my back. 'why are you taking harry home? is he your son? blah blah blah' god i could hear it now. we made it up to my driveway and i was about to park but noticed harry letting out a loud gasp then ducking until he's curled up and below the storage compartment in front of the passenger seat. "uh. harry what are you doing?" "sh. is daddy there?" i look up and surprisingly the man was not there like the last time, "no. why? i thought you dad was okay with you being here?" "u-uh no. no he isn't. i just don't want daddy mad at me like last time because he said he was waiting for me. but i didn't want him to take me home today and i really want to do homework at your house." "um. okay." i guess that makes sense, "well your dad's car isn't in the driveway like usual so i don't think he's home at all." "oh thank goodness." harry whispers and reappears onto the passenger seat with a pained expression. "you okay?" "uh yeah! let's just go in i want to finish my homework!" ♥ "mind passing me the oil, love?" after resettling into the home with harry's backpack messily sprawled across my dining table i started to prepare dinner for the evening. i'm guessing harry's going to be staying for a while because he seems unbothered by the time passing by and dinner time approaching. "oh sure." harry scurries on down from his spot where he was doing homework and runs to aid me with my cooking. we're planning to eat something simple like pasta with a crap load of toppings on it because i'm just that kind of lazy toppings loving guy. "just at the corner over there on the shelf above bottom section." harry nods and makes it to the oil's location trying to grab the bottle, but as soon as he opened the shelf to grab it he tip toed and slightly tripped causing the other bottle which was glass and filled with some old wine i had to start rolling off. "harry-" then crash, a loud sound of glass crashing and liquid splashing echoes the kitchen. "harry!" i turn off the stove to prevent overheating and rush to harry and remembered to be careful with the glass shards all over the countertop and floor. "harry are you alright?" and the poor boy's beautiful overalls and white turtle neck became drenched with wine. "l-louis." i watch his lips quiver and oh fuck he's about to cry, "l-louis i'm so sorry!" he's sobbing loudly with the oil bottle tight in his hold, "i-i'm so sorry please don't be mad, please don't tell d-daddy he'll get so mad at me too! i'm sorry!" i'm not even mad or upset, far from it actually. the cleaning is going to be a fuss, but i could care less about some old wine bottle. "babe, it's okay." and crap, i didn't mean to say that, but harry doesn't seem to notice, "come here and watch your feet. i just wanted to know if you're okay." "i-i am but now i'm all dirty." harry pouts. "well your house is next door we can go and get another outfit-" harry looks a bit panicked and shakes his head, "n-no need to it's okay." "harry, you're drenched in wine. it'll stain and we need to wash it before it does and you need new clothes on." harry looks like he's trying to come up with an excuse and says, "d-daddy's not home remember? and he'll be mad at me too because i didn't come home earlier. please, louis? can i shower here and borrow your clothes?" i try not to laugh, "harry you're too tiny to wear any of my clothes." "please louis?" he pouts and who could say no to that pretty face? "okay fine. i'll let you use one of my sweaters and joggers okay? take a shower then just go to my room and look through the bottom drawer of my brown dressing table for sweaters and some joggers. there's a guest room at the end of the hall and the bathroom's already stocked up so feel free to use shampoo and all that jazz. alright?" "okay, louis! thank you so much!" harry shouts, joyously running out of the kitchen to clean himself up. "i swear, this boy. well, time to get this mess cleaned up." ♥ i was in the midst of finalizing dinner and setting up the table when i heard quick footsteps running down the hallway. "i'm done!" placing the entree down i turn to see harry and oh- "why aren't you wearing any pants harry?" harry's just standing there proudly with hands on his hips wearing nothing but my grey sweatshirt that looks like a damn dress on this kid and- "because look! the shirt is long enough! i'm going to continue homework in your living room okay louis?" harry says and takes his bag off the table and leaves the kitchen again. i close my eyes asking for god's forgiveness even if i'm not that religious because holy shit did harry look so sweet and precious in just that shirt that reached the middle of his thighs like a fucking dress would. after doing so i carried on finishing setting up the table and grabbing a plate for harry since that boy must be hungry. ♥ "done. harry! dinner's on the table! come eat! i bet you're hungry!" i call out, flaking away anything excess off the table with the back of my hand. "harry?" i call again, not getting a response. i decide to check the living took afterwards since the boy wasn't responding and come across harry on the floor on all fours with his bum in the air and- "oh sweet jesus." are those what i fucking think they are. is harry actually wearing- he's fucking wearing panties. harry fucking styles is on the floor doing who knows what with his panty covered ass waving in the air. deep breaths tomlinson. deep breaths. harry is a child for fuck's sake. "h-harry." did it just get hotter in here, "w-what are you doing?" harry who shuffles a little more- oh lord no the shirt's slipping down his back reveal his skin and immature body. god, make it stop. or don't, wait yes make it stop. "l-louis?" the boy mumbles, "my pencil dropped under the sofa but i can't reach it." he seems to have given up because he pulls away and sits back on his bum then pushes his curls back looking like a sweaty mess all because he was trying to get his fucking pencil. "i c-couldn't get it." he pouts and all i could do was stare at harry with my jaws wide open like an idiot because holy fuck. "louis?" "h-huh yeah? what." "why are you staring at me like that." and he giggles real loud into the back of his hand, "it's kind of creepy but i like you so it's okay." oh fuck me i think my dick did a karate like whip in my pants. "u-uh dinner is ready. s-so. come eat. we can get your pencil later." "okay louis!" he rubs his eyes a little and then tries to get back on his feet like a bloody toddler would. i watch him walk by me and he's a bit closer in proximity when my eyes widen because i notice something eerily strange. "harry, why the hell do you have hickies all over your neck!" ***** Chapter 14 ***** ***** FOURTEEN ***** HARRY STYLES     "uh. what are hickies?" louis rolls his eyes and then grabs my arms, making me look right into his face. oh god. the way he did that made me feel both excited and scared, but mostly excited. i don't know, but whenever louis touches me i feel so weird like i want him to do more, like the stuff boyfriends do, like the stuff daddy does to me but without the pain. i know it's naughty, but i can't help but wonder that if louis did the stuff daddy did to me would it feel good? would i like it? sometimes the stuff daddy does does make me feel good but i don't want it. but if louis can do those then maybe i'll like it and want it- "harry you have hickies all over your neck yet you're asking me what they are? they're love bites, bruises by someone else because- because they were doing naughty things with you. where the heck did you get these?! does your dad know about this?! imagine how shocked he'd be if his little boy's out there doing things like this. who the heck gave you them?" of course daddy knows, he's the one who put these um- hickies. what a funny word to say, but i couldn't tell louis that daddy did them. pretty sure daddies aren't supposed to do this in the first place. but stupid, stupid, stupid harry. i'm so stupid. such a stupid idiot. i completely forgot about the nasty stuff daddy did that's why i wore the turtleneck in the first place! but now i have nothing to cover me up with. louis seems to look angry and i feel so bad. i don't want him to be angry. but i have to do whatever daddy says so i don't get hurt so much anymore. daddy says making me up is important, but it's so hard because i get scared someone will see and sadly louis has seen them. "u-uh." louis' hands tighten around my arms, why is he looking at me like that? all wide eyed and creepy looking? i don't like this at all. so i try to push him. "shit- sorry for holding you like that. i just-" louis looks a little sad, but why? "harry is there something you're not telling me." oh no, he's starting to ask questions again what do i do? how do i explain this- "i have a boyfriend." okay i didn't think before i said that but i guess it should work to stop louis from worrying. "okay what?! a boyfriend?! i could've sworn you told me you wanted one just this morning! how on earth did your 'boyfriend' do these? they look pretty old- " "i do have a b-boyfriend. i-it's liam. liam and i are boyfriends. he did these during lunchtime to m-make me feel naughty and we were in the bathrooms and that's why they look old?" "are you telling me all this or asking me to believe you?" louis says and he looks so shocked. "both?" "harry you're too young for all this what the hell. when did you start dating that liam boy? didn't you two literally meet two days ago?!" louis asks and he just looks so confused. "y-yeah but he called me cute and i-i like his face so we just became boyfriends." louis shakes his head, "harry, that's not how things should even start. jesus christ. if you two barely became boyfriends how the hell did he already start marking you all over like this?! you can't just let boys touch you so fast harry!" "how would you even know?" i cross my arms and try to move away from louis. i know i'm lying and i'm doing horrible at it, but louis seems to believe a little that liam and i were doing naughty stuff. okay good. that's all i wanted to check for. i just can't let him know about daddy, not yet. "harry, i'm thirty. i've had many boyfriends and did many things with them and i am experienced. i know a lot more than you do and have done things you shouldn't learn about until you're like at least 18." i don't know why but i didn't like how louis said he had boyfriends in the past. "i said i wanted a boyfriend and i finally got one," i cross my arms over my chest just to make it look like i'm actually upset, "you should be happy for me like when i made a new friend." "harry-" "can we eat i'm hungry. just ignore my marks, my boyfriend did it and that's it. now let's eat." "i need to meet this liam." he says. what the- "what? why?" "to check if he's like using you or not. you're innocent harry and young, you can't let boys use you like this so fast-" i feel my forehead sweating cause i'm scared he'll make it a big deal and then liam's going to ask why i did that and told mr. tomlinson we're boyfriends when we're just friends. "stop it! you're not my daddy and daddy would be fine with it. so just leave me and my boyfriend alone. why do you care so much?!" louis looks scared that i yelled at him and he shakes his head, "harry i know you're lying. if you won't tell me the truth, fine. but i know you don't have a boyfriend." oh my gosh this is getting annoying how come he keeps saying that like he knows? how does he know? "whatever." "don't give me that attitude, styles. let's go eat." louis says. "okay. sorry." ♥ we're eating on the dining table and i'm surprised daddy hasn't tried to find me yet because it's getting pretty late. maybe he's out with his stupid friends again drinking nasty juice. i was eating and looked up from late for a second, but i noticed louis staring at me again like he did when i was trying to grab my pencil. "l-louis?" "h-huh what." "y-you're staring at me again." it's weird, but i kind of like it. i like it a lot that louis' staring at me. "fuck- sorry. um." he looks away and goes back to eating. "you cursed again! that's naughty mr. tomlinson." i giggle a little and see louis glare at me again. "says the one who's got a boyfriend and it's barely the second day of your first year in high school and you're already covered in hickeys. that's absolutely terrifyingly naughty." louis says. gosh, he sounds mad about it. why? "someone's jealous." oh god did i just say that? "e-excuse me? jealous? jealous of what?" eh maybe joking around a little should be okay, "because i have a boyfriend and you don't. you're just a sad little old man with no boyfriend." louis rolls his eyes, "look at you getting all brave. maybe because i believe in waiting?" "i've been waiting for years, louis, to have friends... i'll take whatever i can." i decide to just go back to eating, but i could feel louis staring at me from the other side of the table. ♥ "harry, you're supposed to add the problems and then divide to find x." "what- why are there so many steps?" "because that's what math is? i don't know the bloody prophecy of math, why do you think i'm teaching english and arts?" "whatever at least that was the last problem and now we're done! yay!" "good then, we finished most of your work right?" "yep! we're finally done!" we finished eating and we're back in the living room sitting around louis' coffee table and working on math homework. it isn't too late, just almost 8 and i'm almost done with homework. daddy still hasn't looked for me so hopefully when i have to get back he's asleep and i can just sneak into my room. "say, harry. it's getting late. shouldn't you be getting back? pretty sure your dad's home by now if not before and you have school tomorrow." louis says. before i could stop myself i pout and look at louis with grumpy face because i really, really don't want to go home. if daddy is home and awake he's going to do so many bad things because i'm late and came home with mr. tomlinson again. but i can't stay even if i want to. "y-yeah. are my clothes clean?" i ask. "shit- harry i'm so sorry i forgot to turn the washer on. you could keep the shirt though and return it to me tomorrow yeah," louis says. oh god no. if daddy sees me like this he'll absolutely kill me. "u-uh okay." oh my god i'm dead. please let daddy be asleep. please. i start packing my stuff up and smile at louis who's helping me too. "think you could get home safe?" "pft course i can. it's just next door." if only home was a safe place... "alright, harry. i'll see you tomorrow then?" louis opens the door for me and i thank him again for helping me. "um. louis?" "yeah?" "can you like lean down you're a bit too tall for me." "uh okay." he kneels up to my level so my face is right in front of his. i put my hands around his hairy face and he looks at me with his pretty wide eyes, "thanks for helping me with homework, mr. tomlinson." and i give him a big fat kiss on the cheek. "bye louis!" louis' barely moving from where he was and looked a little shocked. i want to laugh really loud at louis' reaction, but i have to make sure it's quiet so daddy doesn't notice me louis then closes the door when i've left his yard and i look at my house and notice that all the lights are off, but the car is in the driveway so i guess daddy must be asleep. okay, thank god! now i just need to be careful and make it home to my room without making too much noise. i pull the key that's hidden behind a small crack under the floor, louis doesn't need to know i had an extra key so that's a big secret too, and unlock the door quietly shutting it behind me. i tiptoe through the rooms, but i don't see daddy anywhere so i hurry up to get to my room. whew, i'm finally at the front of my door and so far daddy hasn't come out of his room to check for anything. so he must be super asleep which means i'm safe for tonight. i open my door and thank you god- "someone decided to finally fucking show up." oh no. no. no. "d-daddy?!" there he was laying on my bed with a dress and some cuffs in his hands. oh god no, i thought- "did you really think that you could fool me, harry? and what's that you're fucking wearing? pretty sure that ain't a shirt from any of your clothes. were you fucking whoring around?" "n-no daddy-" "shut the fucking door and get on the fucking bed before i beat the shit out of you for disobeying me again. you're lucky i had work extended so i couldn't pick you up, but when i came home i expected to see your ass at home but you were gone for hours." "i-i was at mr. tomlinson's-" "i told you to drop cupcakes and get acquainted not suck his dick-" "i didn't do that!" "you fucking sure? let me guess, that's mr. tomlinson's shirt." i don't know what to say because it is, but i swear i didn't do anything with louis because why would louis want to do naughty stuff with a little weird boy like me? we're friends! and he thinks i have a boyfriend anyway, at least i kind of hope he does. "i fucking thought so. now bring your ass over here because you're in deep fucking trouble. those legs of yours are getting longer now aren't they? thinking you can strut wherever the fuck you want and fuck with whoever you want? not on my fucking watch, harry. i'll have to beat the disobedience out of you-" "d-daddy please not today please, i'm tired-" "are you fucking talking back to me?" i shake my head, i just wanted to sleep, but now i'm crying again. "stop fucking crying, i'll give you a real reason to cry about. dirty fucking boy." i drop my bag to the floor and take off the shirt that louis gave and make sure to place it somewhere safe and away from what's daddy about to do because i know it's going to get messy. very messy. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!