Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/2221773. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage Category: Multi Fandom: The_Avengers_(Marvel_Movies), Thor_(Movies), Captain_America_(Movies), Iron_Man_(Movies) Relationship: Loki/Thor, James_"Bucky"_Barnes/Steve_Rogers Character: Loki, Thor, Odin, Frigga, Tyr, Sif, Fandral, Volstagg, Hogun, Tony_Stark, Steve_Rogers, Natasha_Romanov, Clint_Barton, Pepper_Potts, Bruce_Banner, Nick_Fury, Maria_Hill, Phil_Coulson, James_"Bucky"_Barnes, Laufey, Helblindi, Byleistr_(Marvel), Jane_Foster_(Marvel), Sam_Wilson_(Marvel), Original_Male_Character(s) Additional Tags: Torture, Rape, mute!Loki, Intersex_Loki, Jötunn_Loki, Loki_Feels, loki!whump, Thor_Is_Not_Stupid, Mpreg, Miscarriage, Poisoning, Starvation, Odin's_A+_Parenting, Racism, Team_as_Family, Alternate Universe_-_Canon_Divergence Series: Part 1 of Colours Stats: Published: 2014-09-08 Words: 33376 ****** Loki Wrapped In Red ****** by Marie_Phantom Summary Instead of keeping the infant Loki, Odin gifts him to the army. Thor has spent his life hearing about a person who serves the army, a mysterious figure who never talks, never fights, but is taken everywhere the army is. Upon finally seeing this figure, he is captured by this man, who had no name, and blank empty eyes. This is the story of the evolution of Thor, and the catalyst that changed him from a boy into a man worthy to be king. Notes This story literally came from a dream I had, which I cannot remember except for one image. It had literally consumed me, and I had to write it down. This is, by far, one of the darkest things I have ever written. Heed the warnings, they are there for a reason. I am portraying Asgard as a deeply flawed and backward culture, ruling the Nine Realms similar to a police state. The only exception is Midgard. See the end of the work for more notes Thor first hears about the being when he is listening in on one of his fathers conversations with Tyr. He is meant to be with his tutors, learning his runes, but he has skipped out, confused as to why Tyr, the General, has come to see his father when Asgard is not actively fighting any wars. He sneaks to the door, and presses an ear to it, catching the conversation. "...it does nothing but cry. Cries all day and all night. It cannot lift, it cannot carry, it can barely walk. It's only good for one thing, and even now it's too small to do so." "You must have patience." Odin says, sighing. Thor can hear the faint scratch as Odin rubs a hand down his chin. "I gave it to you for a reason, it still needs to grow to be useful. Eventually, you will not need to worry about it not performing. If it still can't, then kill it and be done." "It's just expensive." Tyr growled. "It's been stealing our tunics, trying to clothe itself." "A thing like that does not need clothes." "I now, but it seems to be under some illusion that it does, to keep warm. Although I don't see how it gets cold, being a Jötunn." Thor gave a small gasp, and immediately out a hand over his mouth to try and stem the noise. There was an actual Jötunn nearby! "You mentioned that it could change it's skin, into that of an Aesir?" Odin asked. "Yes, when it wants to. We try not to encourage it." "Do try and keep your tunics away from it. I shudder to think what should happen if it actually manifested a personality." Odin said, sounding mildly amused. Tyr boomed out laughter. "I shouldn't worry about that!" He said. "It doesn't speak, and any transgression it does it is rapidly punished for. If it ever got close to a personality, then we would be able to beat it out of it." "Then it sounds like it is in your hands." Odin said. Thor heard footsteps at the door and hurried backwards, but not fast enough to not be seen when the door swung open and Tyr and Odin walked out. "Thor, what are you doing here?" Odin asked, sounding disappointed. Thor wrings his hands and looks down at the floor. He doesn't have any words to say. Tyr chuckles and reaches forward to ruffle Thor's blond locks. "It is good to see you, young Odinson." He says. Thor beamed at him. "It is good to see you too, General Tyr."  "Did you come to hear about military things?" Thor quickly latches on to the excuse. "Yes! I want to be a great general one day!" Tyr laughs again. "I am sure you will be!" Tyr claps Thor on the shoulder and then walks out the door, striding down the hallway. Thor watches him go, and is then scooped up by Odin.  "What did you hear?" Odin asks, walking the opposite direction to the nursery. He can already hear Sif and Volstagg fighting.  "Many things." Thor answers. "Anything important?" Thor thinks about the Jötunn nearby, and the beating it would likely be getting in the future. He felt oddly sad. "Nothing important, Father. Nothing important."     ===============================================================================       Thor doesn't hear about the boy for a while. But he doesn't forget. Asgard goes to war with Vanaheim when Thor reaches the equivalent age of 11, and he plays in the garden with his friends, pretending to slay dragons. Frigga sits under a tree, embroiding a piece of cloth (which will one day become Thor's cape). Thor turns to the trees, about to run into the nearby copse to hide, when he sees something move in the undergrowth. He stops, but is not noticed by the others. Two blood red objects moved, and then disappear under a blur of blue. Thor holds his breath. He looks at the objects, and they blink at him again.  He is about to call out, when he hears Tyr roar something in the background. The bush rustles, and the red disappears.  "What are you looking at?" Fandral comes up behind him. He sounds slightly out of breath. Thor swallows around a dry throat. He licks his lips. "Just a bird."     ===============================================================================       Thor meets his first Jötunn when he is only a little bit older. Laufey has been commanded to come to Asgard by Odin so he can pladge his troops to Asgards war against Vanaheim. Thor stands in the greeting delegation with his friends. His mothers hand rests on his shoulder, but he can feel it clench when the continent from Jötunnheim comes closer. Laufey is leading the group. Thor sees that he is tall, taller than Odin. His skin is blue, with raised white lines on it, and he eyes are blood red. Thor remembers seeing eyes like that before, and shivers. He has no hair, and his crown is a series of brass points in his skull. He is dressed in a loin cloth, with leather arm guards and grieves. Flanking him are his sons, Helblindi and Byleistr. Helblindi is slimmer, with a longer face and slender hands. Byleistr dwarfs his father, with a body like a boulder.  They walk to Odin, and kneel. "Hail Odin All-Father, King of All the Realms. We have heard your call and come to pledge our armies to yours." Laufey says. Thor cannot help but notice he says this through gritted teeth. Odin waves an imperious hand and Laufey stands. He doesn't look Odin in the eye. "I thank you, Laufey King, for your support." There is a slightly akward silence, before Laufey says, slightly desperately,  "Have you Senn anything?" Odin shakes his head. "Alas, no." Laufeys shoulders sink. Thor watches all of this with a slight frown. He notices Helblindi looking at him and he grins. Helblindi, to his surprise, goes white and looks away. "I have had your quarters prepared." Odin says, turning and walking to the palace. The greeting party turns and walks with him, with the Jötunns behind. Thor manages to wriggle away from his mother and goes to walk next to Helblindi, who continues to avoid his gaze. "I've never seen a Jötunn before." Thor says. He knows Helblindi is some years younger than him, but the Jötunn already dwarfs him in size. Heblindi doesn't say anything. "Do you all have red eyes?" Thor asks, walking faster to keep up with the Frost Giant. Helblindi nods. He can hear Byliestr come up behind him. "I've seen eyes like yours before." Heblindi says "I thought you've never seen our kind before." He sounds petulant. Thor nods, then frowns and bits his lips. "I think I haven't. I can't be sure. Anyway, it was so long ago I can hardly remember it." There is an uncomfortable silence as they walk to the castle. Thor is about to open his mouth again when he hears Odin says loudly, "I'm sorry to hear about Farbauti. But of course, winter in Jötunnheim is dangerous for even the most hardy creatures, let alone one that was half Light Elf." Laufey's shoulders tense. Behind him, Thor can hear Byleistr whimper suddenly, and Helblindi stops and turns back to his brother. Thor stops and turns as well. Helblindi has one hand placed on Byleistrs massive arm, and is rubbing it gently while Byliestr gasps wetly and roughly scrubs tears from his cheeks. Helblindi himself cried silently, his short black hair getting stuck to his cheeks. Thor remembers his lessons, and knew that Farbauti had been the long time mate of Laufey. He had been famed for his beauty, with a sharp Elfin face and long wild black hair. Thor imagines Helblindi looks a bit like him. Thor also remembers that, for his size, Byliestr is not much more than a toddler.  Who has just lost his mother. The rest of the party move on, leaving Thor, Helblindi and Byliestr alone. Byliestr continues to cry, whilst Helblindi comforts him. Thor wrings his hands. "I'm sorry your mother is dead." He finally says quietly. Helblindi gives up trying to conceal his tears and leans against his brother, sobbing in grief. Thor can feel sympathetic tears in his own eyes. "At least," Helblindi finally says, "at least he joins our brother." "You had a brother?" Thor asks, intrigued. Heblindi nods. "The first born. The True Heir to Jötunnheim. He is dead also. So I am now Heir." Helblindi dissolves into tears again. Thor sits with them, on the edge of the Bifrost, until a guard comes and collects them. He doesn't see Heblindi, Byliestr or Laufey again for many, many years.     ===============================================================================       Thor first sees the being in the army several years later. His is sitting on a balcony, reading a book about star maps, when the Army marches in from Vanaheim. The war is still not over, but the Army regularly comes back to replenish weapons. Thor puts his book down and leans over the balcony. His friends are cooing in the background, entranced at all the soldiers, and he can hear Sif say that she is going to be better than all of them. He ignores them, and looks instead at the wear and tear. Sees what punishment his people have gone through to quash the rebellion, and wonders dimly if it is indeed worth it. He doesn't say these thoughts aloud, for that would be tantamount to treason, and Thor doesn't have a death wish. He eyes the soldiers, and almost misses the figure on the sidelines. The black hair catches the corner of his eye, and he instantly focusses on that. His breath catches n his chest. The figure is tall, for his age. It has long black hair, down to its waist, and skin paler than milk. Even from the balcony, Thor can see sharp just of its shoulder, and the delicate turn of its wrist. It is not clothed, but instead walks naked next to the soldiers. Thor sees it is being lead by a leash attached to a thick collar around its neck. Thor sees red on its legs, and how it limps. He knows that the being is of a similar age to himself, if not younger. Thor is the Asgardian equivalent of a 14 year old. The being is indeed younger. Thor tries not to think about why it limps. "What do you look at?" Hogun asks in the background.  Thor is silent. As he has been for years. This secret is solely for himself.     **************     Thor goes to the army and wanders around. He pretended to be learning for when he becomes a leader of this fighting force, but in reality, he was looking for the figure that he had seen. Had been seeing for years. He goes towards Tyr's tent, and then freezes when he hears the man groan loudly. He tiptoes to the opening of the tent, and leans in. He then quickly leaned back and ran to the edge of the camp, where he vomited into the grass. The image burned into his retinas was this: Tyr, lying on his back in his bed, knees bent and feet on the bed and hands grasping the waist of a youth sitting in his lap. He was thrusting upwards almost violently. The youth had its head thrown back, staring at the ceiling with a blank expression on its face. It's long black hair was being gripped tightly along with its waist, as it rolled its hips in time with the thrusts. Thor had seen both a small flaccid cock and the opening of the vagina behind it where Tyr was thrusting in to. Thor knew how babies were made, had known for years. He had never met a person who was both. He had never seen an expression on a face like the one the youth had.  He hoped never to see it again. Suddenly his burring curiosity was no more. If this was what a great general did, then Thor no longer wanted to be a general.     ****************     Fate had other ideas     ===============================================================================       When Thor got to the equivalent of a 16 year old, Odin decided that it was time that he learnt the rules of being a general. Since Odin had many years left, and there was plenty of time to learn how to be a king, becoming a General was something that apparently needed to be learnt first. Thor didn't protest, because to do so would arouse suspicion. But he was intensely reluctant to do anything with the army, considering what he had seen.  His friends thought that this new promotion was one of the greatest things that had ever happened, and they were always asking his questions about his training. In the beginning, Thor was learning about battlefield manoeuvres, and was always ending days covered in bruises and scrapes. He collapsed into bed every night, and slept a solid 8 hours. This feverish activity kept his mind of the being, but nevertheless, he did think about it. He occasionally heard the men jeering someone in the camp, and the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach told him who it was. He didn't socialise with the men, instead keeping to himself. He gained a reputation for being standoffish and a snob, but he refused to lower himself to the indignity that the rest of the men lived in. He wasn't surprised to learn that Fandral was the first of his friends to partake of the being, which he then described in lurid detail to his friends. Thor sat through the retelling, a smile frozen on his face as he heard how the being first took Fandral into his mouth, then into his cunt "like a proper professional". "I was speaking to some of the longest serving men. Apparently, he's been there since he was young." Volstagg said. Thor took a deep swallow of ale to calm himself down. "I've heard that as well." Sif said. Thor nearly choked. "Odin gifted him to Tyr during the last war with Jötunnheim, and he's been serving the men ever since." "A pity his cock doesn't work." Fandral leered at Sif, who laughed. "I reckon you would have enjoyed him." "He's young, though." Thor said. His voice sounded far away, like he was hearing it from down a tunnel. Fandral turned to him in surprise. "He's a Jötunn. It's well known that all they really are are professional whores. They have both a cunt and a cock, and they are mindless beast who rut and have no deep relationships. The thing wouldn't know any different if it was living in Jötunnheim." Thor thought about Helblindi and Byleistr crying about their dead mother, and kept his mouth shut, lest he give himself away with his radical thinking. He excused himself and went to his room, where he spent the rest of the night staring out of his window, trying not to think about anything. The rest of his friends soon followed in finding their pleasure with the being, and Thor felt himself emotionally starting to cut ties with them. If they acted like this, then clearly they were no better than the rest of Asgard. Thor continued to learn. He learnt about manoeuvres, and battlefield positions. He learnt about weapons. One day, he rolled over in his bed and nearly brained himself on the edge of a hammer, sitting in his pillow which had appeared during the night. He questioned his father, who shrugged and said that a shooting star had been seen the previous evening over the palace, and that maybe that was where the hammer came from. Thor took his word as verbatim, called the hammer Mjolnir, and proceeded to summon lightning and thunderstorms with it whenever he had the slightest temper. He needed more control. Try as he might, he couldn't escape the camp entirely, and so some evenings he ate with the men, pretending to laugh at their appalling jokes and stomach the rations. He saw the being dragged from tent to tent, sometimes by the arm, sometimes by the hair. He heard the groans of sated men, and then the being would stumble out of the tent, unheeding of the semen running down its legs. On those evenings, Thor would sit by the nearest lake and electrocute individual blades of grass, imagining it was the men. Years passed, and Thor continued to learn. He reached his majority, and begged off partying with his comrades by saying he had a headache. He spent the evening lying on the palace roof, staring at the stars. The being was never far from his mind, and he saw it as it too grew. He saw its limbs lengthen, and the flesh cling. He saw the belly sink under the ribs, and the legs become overwhelmed by the suddenly bony knees. One night, the being was dragged in front of the fire and a knife was produced. The men roared with laughter as the being kneeled on the floor and didn't move as all of its hair was shaved off. The strands were brittle, sometimes breaking in the fingers of the men. Thor sat silently as the being was eventually dragged off by the arm, to the corner of the camp, and the hair was burnt in the fire. Those nights, Thor would look at the ceiling of his room and allow gentle tears to kiss his temples. The being didn't cry, so Thor cried for it. The years continued to pass, and Thor got bigger. He filled out, and the eyes of both men and women followed him. He indulged himself, but each coupling was tainted with Thor's reluctance to enjoy himself. Nevertheless, by that time he was a brilliant actor, and his partners would leave with smiles o their faces, whilst Thor continued to watch the skies.     ===============================================================================       Thor was leading a faction of the army in another assault against Vanaheim when he finally interacted with the being. It was late at night, and Thor was in his tent, pouring over battlefield drawing when he heard carousing outside. He leaned up and frowned at the tent flap, which was then pushed open and the Warriors Three walked in, all drunk and all merry. "Thor! How goes the planning?" Fandral asked, clapping Thor on the shoulder and breathing in fumes. Thor leaned back and plastered a fake smile on his face. "Well. We should be able to push back the rebels without too much loss of life." "That's a good thing." Hogun said, leaning heavily against the table. "Indeed it is." "How long," Fandral said, hiccupping in Thor's face, "how long have you been leaning over this table this evening?" Thor frowned at the question. "Since dinner, why do you ask?"  "You seem pretty tense." Volstagg said, reaching up to try and massage Thor's shoulders. Thor smacked his hands away with a frown.  "You need to loosen up." Fandral added, grinning. Thor suddenly felt uneasy, and opened his mouth, about to order them out. He didn't get that far, before Hogun reached back out of the tent and grasped something, dragging it into the tent with some force.  It was the being. Thor gaped. The being looked at the ground, and its hands hung loosely by its side. Its hair was long again, coming down to its waist in greasy tangled waves. Up close, Thor could see that its pale skin was covered by grime, and that it had pointed ears. It resembled a walking skeleton, so thin it was. The skin was papery and dry, and Thor saw many open sores and rashes, from where it had been rubbed against hard surfaces. "Display." Volstagg ordered. The being didn't move for a second, and then its hands moved to its crotch. It lifted its cock out of the way and then used its fingers to spread the lips of its slit, displaying pink, soft flesh. Thor felt sick. "Its all your tonight." "I don't want it." Thor growled. His hands were turning slowly into fists. The being didn't apparently notice the tension in the room, but then, neither did the other. "Nonsense! You need to relax, and that's what this is for!" Fandral hung off of Thor's shoulder and waved a hand in the general direction of the being. "I don't need to relax. I need to plan our next manoeuvres." Thor turned back to the maps. "Fine then." Volstagg said, grabbing the being by the elbow and jerking it to the opening. "Its not like there aren't other that don't want it." The others moved off, and suddenly Thor could see, clear as day, what sort of evening the being had. "Wait!" he said. The others stopped. Thor smiled and rubbed his shoulders. "Perhaps I will partake." "That's the man!" Fandral crowed. He grabbed the being from Volstagg and pushed it towards Thor. The being stumbled and fell to its knees, putting out its hands to steady itself. Thor reminded himself not to look at it but continued to smile at his friends. "I would like some privacy, if you wouldn't mind." He said, putting a bit of the iron command that he could wield behind it. The others grinned at each other and wandered out of the tent, closing the flap behind them and leaving Thor and the being alone. "Get up." Thor commanded. He walked to his bed and sat down, rubbing the area between his eyes and sighing deeply. He heard a rustle and opened his eyes to see the being had stood up. It was frozen where it stood, eyes to the floor, barely breathing. "Come here." There was a twitch, and the being walked slowly over. It stopped in front of Thor and swayed on its feet. Thor looked at the downturned face, into blank green eyes, and felt his heart break slightly. "I don't need anything from you this evening." Thor told the being. There wasn't even a twitch. The words didn't register, the being didn't understand. Thor licked his lips. Slowly, the being knelt and reached for the opening in Thor's trousers. Thor reared back and grasped those spider like digits. "No!" he said. The being stopped moving. Thor cradled the hands in his gently before returning them to the being, who placed them on its thighs. Thor ran a hand through his hair and wondered what to do. He sat there for a while, running over different scenarios in his head, whilst the being knelt at his feet. Finally, Thor decided to ignore him, and he stood up and walked around the being to get undressed. He slipped into his sleep shirt and turned back to the bed, to find the being lying on it, legs spread and staring at the ceiling. "Odin's ravens." Thor cursed under his breath. He went to the bed and stared helplessly down at the being. The being didn't move.  "Move." Thor said, and the being rolled over onto its stomach, pushing its backside out. Thor gritted his teeth.  "Move to the end of the bed." He ordered. There was a pause as the being took in this new order, and then it crawled to the end of the bed. It was still on its hands and knees. Thor then crawled between the sheets and snuffed out the candles using wind. In the dim light of the moon, he could see that the being had not moved. "Lie down." The being curled into a small ball, with its back to Thor. Thor supposed it was lucky that the being knew that command. Thor rolled onto his back and willed himself asleep, trying to ignore the presence at the end of the bed. It wasn't hard, because the being barely even breathed. In the morning, Thor saw that the being had left, or had been taken out to be serviced by others. In a dim part of his mind, he wondered whether that was the first night that the being had not been used in a long, long time.     ****************     During the rest of the campaign, the being was foisted onto Thor several more times. Thor continued to try and ignore it, ordering it to the end of his bed, and once onto the floor when the being had started to bleed from its arm onto the sheets. Thor tried not to touch it, couldn't bring himself to, because if he did, the being might wonder if this was a new order and act as such. When he got home, Thor went in to the bathhouse, and took the hottest bath he could. He felt grimy and unclean, and scrubbing himself pink, and tried not to think about what was happening to the being, now that he was not there.     ===============================================================================       Thor was called down to Midgard, with his troops, when Odin had called him in to the throne room and told him that a being known as the Other had taken an army of creatures called the Chitauri and invaded the planet, in search for a cube called the Tesseract. He arrived in the middle of the desert and was almost immediately surrounded by men inshore suits. His troops behind him put up their weapons, but Thor did not, looking for the man that appeared to be in charge. He found that man in Coulson, who, after hearing why he was there, escorted him to a name aptly name Fury, who then introduced Thor to members of the Avengers Initiative. Thor found them pleasantly likeable, while his troops regarded the Midgardians with distain. They mumbled and muttered and every so often, would try to trip up Natasha and humiliate her. They stopped when she broke the wrist of one of Thor's more senior officers. Thor smiled and thanked Natasha. The invasion culminated in a place called New York, where Thor commanded his troops to defend people rather than attack the Chitauri, leaving that duty to the Avengers. He organised escape attempts, and personally escorted people to the safety zones.  By the end, the Other was dead, and he his troops laughed and feasted in the bowels of Stark Tower (now called Avengers Tower). Thor himself did not join them, but ate with his new team mates, laughing quietly at their jokes and feeling a sense of camaraderie with them he had not felt in a long time. Thor was particularly fascinated by Steve Rogers, due to the magic running through his veins and the fact that, like Thor, he too wasn't all that comfortable with the world. They would sit on the sofa and discuss politics and the war the Captain had been involved in before he had been frozen. Thor was surprised to discover that Steve bore no ill will against the people of Germany, but instead wished to visit the country some day. Steve would often turn melancholy when talking about friends, especially about his close friend Bucky, and Thor would quickly steer away from that topic when he saw Steve's face drop.  Through Steve, Thor learnt a lot about the history of Midgard, and when he evaluated this realms politics against his own, he felt a tendril of shame in the pit of his stomach as he realised that Asgard fit the bill as a police state. 'When I am King, that will change." He vowed to himself, and didn't speak of it aloud. When it came time to return to Asgard, he thanked all of his new friends, and took his troops home. He vowed to return some day. As he got back to Asgard, he reported to his father, and saw a slow hunger take over the mans face. In that moment, he knew that his father now longed to control the realm of Midgard, and in that moment, Thor swore that he would do anything in his power to protect it.     ===============================================================================         Thor went back to the army shortly after, the only thing on his mind was sleeping with the quite presence of the being at the foot of his bed. He frowned as he went into his tent and saw that the being was not already there, waiting for him. He left and wandered around the camp, until he cornered one of the sergeants and asked. "Oh, it got itself into a bit of trouble. Needed sorting out." Thor felt himself go cold. "Where is it?" he asked. The sergeant pointed to the edge of the camp and Thor went. As he drew nearer, he could hear men swearing and a rustling sound. He turned the corner, around a tent, and saw five men holding down the being. The being itself was struggling slightly, legs moving weakly in the dirt. Thor frowned as he watch the slightly firm belly heave. "Hold him still." Grunted one of the men. He went to the beings face and pinched the nose shut, until the being gasped for air. The man emptied a vile of black liquid into the mouth and clamped the jaw shut, saying "Swallow, you bastard." Eventually, the being swallowed and the men let his limbs go. The being lay on the ground, stretched out and staring at the sky. "Greeting, General." said one of the men, turning around and seeing Thor. Thor ignored him. "What is happening?" Thor asked, his eyes not leaving the being. The others laughed. "It just being uncooperative at the moment. Soon that'll be gone, and it'll resume its normal life." Thor didn't say anything. He could see the being start to heave slightly, the skin of its belly rippling. "Have you killed it?" Thor asked. The men shook their heads. "Every few month it gets like this. Just need to give it that potion and it'll be back to normal." "I would like to be alone with it." Thor said. The others shrugged and sauntered off. As soon as they were gone, Thor crouched down beside the being and placed a hand gently on its shoulder. The being ignored him, its face contorting as the rippling in its belly increased. A high pitched keening sound emerged from its throat, and spidery hand grasped at the skin of its stomach. "Whats happening?" Thor asked, and then immediately berated himself when he realised that the being was not going to be able to answer back. The being was starting to pant in panic, its hands pressing into its stomach. Thor couldn't ignore his instincts and pulled the being until its back was against his chest, his hands crossing over its ribs and rubbing small circles into the skin. The being continued to keen, getting higher and higher, and Thor got all the more confused. Suddenly the being opened its legs wide and tipped its head back, opening its mouth and crying. Thor looked over its shoulder and saw a sudden gush of red, coming from between its legs. The belly flattened suddenly, and Thor knew now what the potion had been for. The being continued to heave, until there was nothing coming from it. It slumped in Thor's arms for a minute, before pushing off and kneeling in the red. Thor followed with his eyes, feeling hollow. The being reached out a hand gently touched a small white object in the blood. Thor saw that it was a tiny hand, curled as if in sleep. The being was now openly crying, gasping out great heaving sobs. Thor sat there, staring at the being as it grieved. This was the first show of emotion he had seen from it, and he knew now that e almost preferred it blank to what he was seeing now. The being didn't stop crying, but Thor needed to rest, so he gently picked up the being by the arms and carried him through the camp. He ignored the stares he got, as the being still keened, and made his way to his tent. The shut the flap and placed the being on the bed. He wanted to wash the blood off of the being, but he despised the thought of touching it anywhere near its crotch. The being was in a delicate state, and Thor wanted to be careful with it. Thor spent the rest of the night sitting on the floor beside the bed, listening to the being cry. He felt empty inside, and when the being was dragged from his tent in the morning to service the other men, Thor dragged a blanket to the floor and went to sleep. In his dreams, the being (not a being, a man) looked at him with wide green eyes, and his lips moved in speech. But Thor didn't hear what he said. The war with Vanaheim raged on, but Thor could see now that it was not a rebellion, but a bid for independence. He fought, and commanded, and tried no to think about the man in the camp, even though he saw him almost every day. The man served the troops more than ever, often now around the campfire, where he rode the men to the sound of jeering at catcalls. Thor tried to ignore it, but found himself often staring into space as his mind painted a ghastly picture of what was happening. Sometimes, the man would spend the evening with Thor, where he would present himself to Thor as he would the troops, and Thor would push him to the end of the bed to sleep. Thor often felt that the man would forget him between meetings, as the same thing happened seemingly every night. But one day, after the man had serviced a soldier around the fire, and had been burt badly when he had fallen in, he appeared at Thor's tent and swayed towards the bed, without doing anything for Thor like Thor would normally expect. The man crawled onto the bed and settled down at the end, tucking its knees under its chin and looking at the sheets with blank empty eyes. Thor gaped for a second, and then turned to his medical supplies and brought out a large jar of burn paste. He walks to the bed, to where the man is curled up, and gently touches his shoulder. The man immediately turned onto his back and spread his legs. Thor felt sick but pressed on, closing the legs and laying them down flat. He put the jar beside the man and sat down, slyly turning the man until his right side was exposed. Thor closed his eyes at the broad expanse of shiny red skin, and knew it must hurt something fierce, but the man didn't give any indication he was in pain. "I need to heal your side, otherwise it will scar." Thor said. The mans face didn't flicker. Thor took the top off the jar and dug out a thick handful of paste, slowly reaching over and smearing it over the burn. The mans eyes closed slightly, but otherwise he didn't move. Thor watched as the burn slowly turned white as it healed. It would scar, but Thor thought that that was the least of the mans problems. Thor ideally watched the mans face as the paste worked, and could see a tiny, minute lessening of the tension between his eyes. "I hope that feels better." Thor said. He didn't expect an answer, and he didn't get one. But he heard a soft sigh, and the skin underneath his hands lost the tension. The man turned blank eyes to Thor and slowly reached out a hand to grasp Thor's He fiddled with the fingers still covered in paste, and gently guided the fingers around to his front, to where the mans nipples had been until recently. Thor had visibly winced when he had looked one day and seen the open sores on the mans chest, when his men had gotten too carried away and had cut his chest, leaving two massive scars imprints where before there had been small nipples. The man had nearly bled to death, only recovering when one of the men had noticed and had cauterised the wounds with a hot knife. The man hadn't even moved. Thor slowly moved his fingers in a circle, covering the mans chest with paste and feeling even then the tension flow out. The man must have been feeling awful if he was dictating where Thor should direct the paste. Thor rubbed the paste into the skin, and could feel the man slowly sink into the bed. He was practically asleep when Thor wiped off his fingers, change and slid beneath the sheets. Thor thought about how he could feel the breastbone beneath his fingers, how thin the skin was. He resolved to bring some of his meal with him next time, and try and feed the man. Thor spent the night awake, listening to the man at the end of his bed breathing softly. It was a cool night, but Thor didn't offer the man a blanket, because he knew that, even though he was literally thin skinned, cold was something the man never was.     ****************     Thor brought food the next day. The man didn't touch the soup, but grabbed the bread and nibbled at it. His stomach distended painfully, but he finished the whole piece. However, not much later he bent over and vomited into the grass outside the tent. Thor felt immensely guilty, and, after asking the camp physician some covert questions, next presented the man with a simple drink of crushed apples and milk. The man sipped slowly, and finished half of the bottle before he stopped. Thor gently took the bottle and helped the man to the bed, where he lay on his back but didn't spread his legs. Instead, he placed a hand gently onto his concave stomach and rubbed. Some nights, Thor couldn't get the man to himself, and he didn't sleep as well, as he imagined what horrors the man would be going through. The nights after the man was away, he would stumble into Thors tent, and climb onto the bed, legs spread. Thor felt his heart break in those moments, and would gently push those legs together, all the while mumbling "It's alright, there's no need for that, I don't want that from you". What little progress he had been making would be undone, and the man, that pale, haunted man would revert back to the blank slate that he was. Thor battled during the day and night, for two very different causes.     **************   Thor now came home infrequently, and when he did, he spent much time in the library. He chose books about Jötunns, about philosophy, about training animals. He wanted to learn everything he could about changing people, about the self. His 'friends', for they were not his friends any longer, teased him about becoming a bookworm. He responded to their jests with weak jokes, but so removed was he from them, that they no longer noticed that there was no humour behind them. Thor looked at his father very differently, now that he had gone to Midgard and seen what true democracy was. He saw a man so set in his ways that to change would be almost impossible. He saw his mother as a frail figure, too cowardly to try and enforce a new order, and, as he had with his friends, he started to emotionally cut ties with them. It was when he was reading a book about the history of Jötunnheim that he realised that he had never heard the man being called by a name. He frowned. Even the palace dogs had names. He put his book down, and that night, he brought out the books he used to read as a child, trying to find a suitable name for the man. He had deliberately chosen his childhood books because he felt that the man needed something that came from joy, not something that came from his countries oppression, as all the Jötunn names that he had read had come after that realm was conquered by Asgard. He was reading stories from Midgard (a book that had been sneakily given to him by a maid when he was a boy, and that he had hid from his parents his entire life), when he came across his favourite stories, about the Norse gods. He liked them for the fanciful tales they spun of Asgard, as nothing like the stories had happened. But he admired them for their imagination, and he enjoyed envisaging himself performing the deeds for which he was apparently famous. He was reading about the legend of Sleipnir when he came across a name he had been reading about a few times. His large fingers traced the name and he whispered it under his breath. Just saying it, and he thought of the man who lay at the end of his end in the evenings. When he went back to camp, he waited that evening for the man to come. Eventually, the man stumbled into his tent at around 2 in the morning. There was dried semen on the inside of his thighs, and his arms hugged his belly. It was concave again, and Thor knew now that the only sustenance that the man got was with him. Thor felt sad, that even the wolves that trailed the army ate better than this man.  "Sit." Thor said and gestured to the bed. The man wondered over and sat, tucking his feet under his body. He continued to look at the floor, but gently took the offered glass when Thor came over with his meal. The man sips slowly, so slowly, learning again what food is, after so many days without it. Thor watches him, and tries to ignore the tugging in his chest. He reaches under his pillow and pulls out the book. "Do you know what this is?" Thor asks, showing it to the man. The man doesn't look at it, at least openly, but Thor can see he is looking out of the corner of his eye. Thor opens the book to the brightly coloured pictures. The man abandons his glass and starts looking openly. His face is blank, but his eyes widen as he looks at the pictures. He nearly drops the glass, but remembers just in time and places it down on the floor. Thor takes the liberty of shuffling closer and extending the book. The man looked at the bright images, and swallowed tightly. Thor can see his hands twitch.  "Do you see these pictures?" Thor said softly. The mans hands twitch again. Thor points to a picture of the Jötunn, the man out of place, but a necessary man to the Gods. "This man fascinates me." The man in the pictures is slight but well built, with long red hair, a pointed beard and sharp green eyes. Thor knows other eyes like that, except they are blank. "He was an outsider, a man not of the Aesir but much needed. He was a mother, a father, a much needed man. He is Chaos, Mischief, Fire and Lies. He is a needed neutral, the epitome of balance. I think its a pity that he only exists in stories," Thor said, placing the book on the bed in front of the man, "I would have liked to have met him." The man stared at the picture, and then, ever so slowly, reached out and touched the eyes, those green sparkling eyes. Then, he reached up to his thin face, and touched the skin below his own eyes. He never looked at Thor, but instead continued to look at the picture. "Yes, he has the same shade as your eyes." Thor whispered. He looked at the man, and then reached out his own hand. He placed it beside the hand laying on the book, not touching, but allowing the man to feel the warmth. The mans face didn't flicker, but his fingers curled slightly. "I think you should take his name." Thor said softly. The man froze. Even his breathing lessened. Slowly he withdrew his limbs, and hunched in on himself, placing his hands on his lap. Thor reached over and gently took the mans hands in his. His hands dwarfed the others, but Thor continued to hold them gently, and rubbed the oversized knuckles in a soothing manner. "I know that you have never had anything even resembling a name." Thor whispered. "I know that you are confused, but I feel that I would like to call you something, when you are here in my tent." The man shook his head slightly. His eyes were wide, and staring in disbelief as his hands were gently massaged by Thor. "I must call you something." Thor said. He didn't add that he wanted to call him a name, so that the man would become even more important to Thor. His whole being was slowly becoming devoted to this man, this hollow, broken being. "I want you to have this name, because you too are an outsider." Thor murmured. "You do not belong to our race, you too are Jötunn. But I see a great potential in you. I can see power, and flame, and great chaos. So that man," Thor released a hand and gestured to the book, "that mans name is yours, because he is you. The Midgardians were clever, they could see a man like this emerging, but they got their stories mixed up. But they could see Loki, could see how important he was, and so that is why from now on, you will be Loki." Thor gripped those fragile hands, and brought them slowly to his lips. They tickled Loki's skin. "You will be Loki, because you are important to me." The man, now Loki, closed his eyes tightly, but was not able to prevent a single tear from slipping free. It traced a pale line in the grime on his face, and Thor reached up to wipe it away. He cupped the hollow cheek, and Loki leaned into it, nuzzling the softness of Thor's palm. That night, Loki did not sleep at the end of the bed, but instead slept alongside Thor. Thor did not touch him, but spent the night staring at Loki's face, slack in sleep.     ===============================================================================       Vanaheim was decimated. Thor walked the battlefield, gasping as he looked over the bodies. He had no idea that ultimate power looked like this. The Light Elves, a truly beautiful race of people, were lying everywhere. Some had missing limbs. Others had holes through them. Heads were missing, arms lying feet away from their owners. Thor felt sick. He felt ashamed.  He wanted to pretend that this was all a dream. He jumped when he felt a hand grasp his cloak. He looked down into the tortured eyes of a survivor Light Elf, who was gasping for air. The man was painted red in blood, his pitch black hair strewn around his face. He was missing his legs, and had dragged himself towards Thor. Thor kneeled down. "M...mercy." The man gasped, releasing Thor's cloak and putting his hands together in a prayer position. Thor reached out and pulled the man into his lap, stroking the hair from his face. "You have mercy. I will not harm you." Thor said, staring into those white eyes. The man blinked, and tears slid down his face. "Alric!" The man called suddenly. He twisted in Thor's arms, looking around the field. "Alric!" "Sshhh." Thor soothed, gently pushing the hair from the mans face. "Where is Alric?" The man asked, turning back to Thor, his face twisted in grief. The mans hand twisted, trying to reach out to someone who wasn't there. "Who is Alric?" Thor asked. The man sobbed. "Alric...is my...my...husband!" He gasped. "My only...where is he?" Thor licked his lips and looked out over the field. The man sensed his hesitation and started to cry harder. "Alric is-" "Is he dead?" Thor could see the man was gasping harder, and knew he had only minutes left. Thor decided to ease the man suffering. He looked over his shoulder and said "You must be Alric." The man in his arms twisted, but Thor prevented him from looking and instead continued his conversation with a man who was probably long dead. "I have your husband in my arms. He is waiting for you." Thor sounded, trying to sound reassuring. But even he could hear the wobble in his voice. "Alric is waiting for...me?" the man said softly. His breathing was slower, and his body started to slacken. Thor tuned his attention back to the man and said softly, "He is waiting for you, so go to him, and be at peace." "Al...Alric." The man said and let out a final sigh. He died in Thor's arms.  Thor let the man go gently, flooding his arms across his stomach. He stood up, and walked out of the field, ignoring the calls of the Warriors Three and Sif. He went straight to his tent and started to scrub the blood from his arms.  Nobody bothered him that night. Loki was being used and dragged amongst the men, as a party favour for the triumphant army. Thor knew that he would eventually come to Thor, in a few days, with the blank expression on his face and quite possibly blood on his thighs. Thor had noticed that Loki's stomach was firm again, but not through food. Thor spent the night sobbing into his hands, cursing his birthright and wanting, for the first time in his life, to be something other than the prince of Asgard.     **************     Thor found Loki three days later, sitting at the edge of the camp in a puddle of blood. He was not crying this time, but staring blankly at the blood. Once again, Thor sees the underdeveloped bones of Loki's baby, and he felt sickness rise in his belly. He took Loki gently in his arms, and carried Loki to his tent. The man in his arms could not cry, Thor suspected his grief was so intense, so he lay still as a log in Thor's arms. Thor was gentle with him, and as he lay on Thor's bed, he didn't make any motions to open his legs. Thor gently cleaned the blood from his legs, but didn't move towards the space between Loki's legs, because the last thing he wanted to do was give Loki any hint of any desire he might have of him. Thor had none. He only wanted to provide comfort. When as much of the blood was cleared as Thor could, Thor doused the lights and slid into bed beside Loki. Loki himself continued to stare at the ceiling, but he lay alongside Thor, on top of the blankets. Thor places his open hands beside Loki, never touching, but allowing Loki to feel the warmth of his flesh. Just before he fell asleep, he heard a rustle, and felt Loki take one of his hands. He felt Loki raise it slightly and then dry parched lips pressed softly into it. Thor fell asleep with Loki still holding his hand. He didn't dream.     **************     The army marched back into Asgard in triumph. Every citizen was there, cheering on the returning troops. Flags were being waved, flowers were being thrown. Thor led them on top of his mighty horse. He felt empty. This was meaningless. He didn't want to go back to his rooms in the palace. He didn't want to leave Loki to the army. Loki was slowly becoming the most important thing in his world, and he loathed to leave him to the rest of the men. Loki seemed to have been doing better, those nights he spent with Thor. Thor had brought more books, and Loki was slowly becoming more animated. He would gently stroke the pages when the thought Thor wasn't looking, and even thought Thor was positive that Loki wasn't able to read, the picture books held his attention for longer than anything else. The entered the palace, holding his helmet in his hand and Mjolnir hanging from his belt. His mother and father were standing by the throne, looking at him with pride on there faces. Thor felt cold, even though the smile on his face apparently said the opposite. "My son, you have triumphed against the rebels from Vanaheim." Odin said. His voice echoed, and the court cheered. Thor's face turned into a rictus grin. "Yes Father. They were easily repelled in the end." ("Alric?"). Thor swallowed. "You have proved yourself worthy to be the Prince of Asgard. You have proved that you can lead and commands and army, and show the rebels that Asgard is still the Realm Eternal, and such actions will not be tolerated!" The court roared. "You have showed that you will be finally worthy of the throne." Thor swallowed minutely. The last thing he wanted at the moment was the throne. "Hear what I say!" Odin roared, and the court went silent. "I announce that, on this day, Thor will now be considered Co-Regent, and the fellow ruler of Asgard!" Thor felt the bottom drop out of his stomach. He felt himself go cold with shock, and his vision of his father swam. He deliberately locked his weak knees, so he didn't disgrace himself and collapse in front of his father, his mother, and the most important people in Asgard. He gritted his teeth and raised his hammer in celebration, to the sound of the troops and his 'friends' cheering for him. But although he had wanted this all of his life, the only thing he wanted to do was curl with with Loki, a picture book, and soft light. His duties as co-Regent began the next day, when he oversaw the disbanding of the army. He stood and observed the troops as they took apart their camp, traded in their weapons and went back home to their families. He secretly kept his eyes peeled for any sign of Loki, but he was being well hidden. He gave the men their final payments, signed papers, and tried to ignore the ribald jokes being made by the men to their wives. Thor knew that the men making the most obvious innuendos had often been the ones who had taken Loki in public, often to jeering and encouragement as Loki was forced to do more and more humiliating things. Thor finished his duties, and was about to he'd back inside, when Tyr came over to congratulate Thor on his becoming Co-Regent. Thor turned to thank the man, and suddenly saw Loki out of the corner of his eye. He was standing behind Tyr's horse, hands tied to the saddle, face to the ground. Thor reined in his anger and turned to Tyr. "Many congratulations, Your Majesty!" Tyr clapped him on the shoulder. Thor didn't flinch, but stared into the faces of one of his fathers oldest friends, and felt nothing but acute hatred. "Thank you, General, for your kind words." Thor said, returning the clap on the shoulder. He kept Loki in the corner of his eye. But that proved to be difficult when Tyr started to lead him away, intent on having a private conversation. They rounded a tent and Tyr kept his hand on Thor's shoulder. "I understand that this can be a big tradition for you." He said. Up close, Thor could see that his eyes were blank and cold, and suppressed a shiver of disdain. "It's not every day that a man goes from a General to a Regent." "Indeed it is not." Thor agreed. "The thing is," Tyr leaned closer, conspiratorially, "I know that your own personal workload will have increased dramatically." Thor thought about what he still had to do today, and didn't bother to suppress his wince. Tyr saw this and pounced. "I know that now you will not be able to devote all of your attentions to the army, as you have done so in the past. I was wondering if I might lessen the workload for you." Tyr grinned at Thor, and Thor, despite himself, felt slightly relieved that he wouldn't have to focus so much on the army, and he would be able to devote more time to his studies on politics, and the Privy Council. But then he thought of Loki, strapped to the horse like a stray dog, and his thoughts became grey and clouded. He looked at Tyr, and decided to play his hand as Prince. "That is a very kind offer, and I would be glad to take you up on it." Thor leaned closer. "You may have heard, from the men, that I have been enjoying the attentions from that man attached to your horse." Tyr snorted. "It is no man, but go on." "I have been impressed by the skill he shows in his duties, and have realised, coming back to the palace, that there is no one here that shares that skill." Tyr nodded in agreement. "Indeed, it has been used solely for such pleasures its entire life. Its not worth anything else." Thor resisted the urge to use Mjolnir to bury Tyr into the ground, and continued. "I was wondering if it would be possible to continue to use it whilst I stay at the palace. I feel that I would be missing out, if I went with anyone else." Tyr roared with laughter and grinned at Thor. "You have a mighty lust!" He chortled. Then he nodded. "Indeed, I shall send it to you when you need him. It is skilled at fucking, if nothing else." Thor smiled and nodded, feeling his heart lighten. He watched Tyr walk away, and the minute Tyr rounded the tent and disappeared from sight, the smile dropped from his face. "I'm a fertility god, you stupid cunt. Of course I have a great lust."     **************     Thor waited four days before first sending for Loki. He didn't want to arouse suspicion by acting too quickly. But he prepared himself for what Loki would look like when he arrived, and he found that even though he had prepared himself, his heart still sank when Loki walked through the door and stood in the entrance, arms loose and gazing at the ground. Loki swayed slightly on his feet, and Thor saw that he had been serviced recently, for there was still wetness between his legs, and bruises on his hips. Thor stood up from his desk where he had been checking the tax records for the Kingdom, and walked towards Loki. "Do you remember me, Loki?" he asked gently. He did not touch him, but ducked slightly to look Loki in the face.  Loki gave no verbal indication, but Thor saw a minute lessening of the tension in his shoulders, and Thor knew that he had been recognised. Thor stood up. "Follow me." He said and walked to his bathroom. He heard a slight hesitation and then the soft patter of bare feet. Thor gave a slight smile and walked into the room, where steam hung in the air from where he had filled the bath full of slightly warm water. Thor went to get a towel and a soft sponge, and turned to see Loki at the door, arms now hugging his waist as he looked at the bath with suspicion in his eyes. "I suspect that you have never had a bath." Thor saying, laying his objects gently down by the side and walking to Loki. He still didn't touch him. "But I would like to get you clean, if that is alright with you." Thor knew that Loki did not have enough self-awareness to have opinions, but there was a further lessening of his shoulder, and Thor took this as a yes. He took Loki gently by the hand and led him to the bath, where he sat him on the edge. He then manoeuvred Loki's feet so that they sat in the warm water. Loki's eyes widened and he almost kicked. "I know, it must feel strange." Thor murmured, soaping up the sponge and rubbing it gently over the thin, bony limbs. Loki continued to stare at the water. "I would like to see you clean. It feels much nicer than being dirty." Thor continued to talk about innocuous things, as he gently cleaned up Loki's legs. He found that the black on his toenails wasn't actually dirt, but a natural part of his biology, and correctly assumed that Loki's black fingernails were natural also. When it came to cleaning between his legs, Thor avoided the area, and gently lowered Loki fully into the water. Loki trembled slightly but otherwise didn't move. Thor stepped behind him, cleaning his back and shoulders, his arms and his chest. He got Loki's hair wet, and gently lathered it and got it clean. He internally despaired when so many strands came out in his fingers. When Loki was finally clean, he stood him up and wrapped Loki in soft towels, drying his skin gently. His hair once again reached his waist, and Thor gently rubbed it until it was no longer dripping. Clean, Loki was paler than the moon, and the dirt had covered open sores that had never been allowed to heal. Thor took Loki by the hand and guided him out of the room. Loki saw the bed, and recognised that Thor was once again resuming their interactions. He sat down at the end, and curled into a ball, facing the pillows. Thor tidied up the bathroom, and saw, out of the corner of his eye Loki rub a hand gently down his skin. Thor knew the feeling of freshly washed skin was pleasantly tingly. "It feels nice, doesn't it?" Thor asked, coming back to the bed. Loki stopped touching his arm and curled up again, keeping his eyes fixed on the pillows. Thor went to the bed and stripped down to his sleep pants, and then pulled another picture book out from under his pillow. "I think we should read something different." Thor said, opening it. He pushed the open book towards Loki, who uncurled himself and crawled up the bed to better look at the book. "It is a book about the Grecian Parthenon. I got it when I was on Midgard, a few years ago." Loki hunched his shoulders and stared at the pictures, mouth slightly open in wonder. He reached out a hand and stroked the words, gently. Thor felt his heart clench and gave Loki a small smile. "I shall read to you." Thor said, and started on the first page. He enjoyed the stories about the Gods, the politics and infighting, the many different personalities. After each page, he would stop and let Loki look his fill of the pictures. Loki would indicate when it was time to turn the page by dragging a finger across the edge.  They spent a quiet evening together, looking at the book. When they had finished, Thor slid under the covers and doused the lights. Loki slept alongside, his hand just touching Thor's. In the morning, Loki was gone.     ***************     Thor knew better than to try his hand. He couldn't call for Loki too many nights, otherwise Tyr and his parents might have become suspicious. He tried to get Loki into his chambers whenever it publicly appeared that he had had a bad day, so it looked like Loki was there to relieve the tension. Thor knew he would swallow his own tongue before he would use Loki like that. Loki would appear at his door in the evenings, sometimes freshly used, sometimes not. Always, he would look at the floor, and always, he would quickly follow Thor into the bathroom to get himself cleaned. From what Thor could gather, he seemed to enjoy the baths, and would always rub his newly cleaned skin when he thought Thor wasn't looking. Thor always had a fruit bowl in his rooms, and would always make Loki his drink, because he knew that Loki was still only eating when he came to Thor.  Sometimes, they didn't look at the books. They simply lay together, with Loki sleeping as deeply as he could, and Thor looking at his face. One night, after reading together, Loki lay sleeping shallowly beside Thor, his arms hugging his chest. Thor hovered a hand over his skin, and felt the unnatural cold. He could hear the slight wheeze coming from Loki's chest, and how his lips parted, trying to drag in more air. Thor knew Loki was now living on borrowed time, and that it would be soon when his body finally failed him, and he died, probably after servicing someone. Thor had vowed to look after Loki, from the minute he was first pushed into his tent all those years ago, but for the life of him, Thor didn't know how.     ****************     Some nights, Loki came to Thor, and his eyes were red rimmed, and his legs were bruised, and from the brief glimpses Thor could see him bleed from the slit between his legs. Those nights, Thor draped a blanket over the slim figure on the bed, and slept on the balcony, under the stars.     ****************     "Its obviously becoming very useful to you." Tyr said one day, after an afternoon discussing troop movements. Thor frowned slightly in confusion before his expression cleared and he grinned in disdain. "I find that being with him helps my mental clarity." This was not a lie. Thor often thought clearer after a night spent at Loki's side.  Just not about Asgard. "You know," Tyr said, putting a hand on Thor's shoulder, "I was fucking it the other night, and it spent the entire time looking at the door." Thor swallowed down his bellow of rage and chocked out "Oh, really?" "Damnedest thing. Normally it spends times like that staring at the ceiling, but now its staring to look at the exists. I've asked some of the men, and they have all reported that it does the same with them." "How strange." "Mmmm." Tyr fixed Thor with a suddenly sharp eye, and Thor tensed. "What does it do with you, when you fuck it?" Thor raised his head high, and stared down his nose at Tyr. "Much the same thing." He lied. "I find it less distracting when he is focusing on something else, rather than being blank." Tyr nodded and rubbed his chin. He dropped his hand and continued to look at the charts in front of him. Thor did the same. Thor had thought the conversation was forgotten, until at the end, when he was leaving, Tyr suddenly said "I've noticed, you never call it 'it.'" Thor froze. He didn't turn around to look at Tyr. "Figure of speech."  "It's almost as if, you see it as something other than the whore it is." Thor took a deep breath, then whirled around and looked at Tyr with a brittle smile. "How could I possibly think that? After all, don't the Aesir see the Jötunn as nothing more than conquered vermin?" With that, he strode out of the room. He missed Tyr saying softly "They do, but you don't." That night was the first night that Thor was not able to gain access to Loki. The servant returned with the note clutched in his hands, shaking his head. Thor spent the night on his balcony, legs dangling over.  He tried not to think about what was happening to Loki. He didn't succeed.     ****************     Thor managed to see Loki a few days later. Loki was back to staring wide eyed at the floor, his hips practically black with bruising. That night, Thor stroked Loki's hair softly as he slept, and wept quiet tears of grief.     ****************     Thor was busier than ever, and couldn't see Loki as much as he was able to. But when Loki did come, Thor brought out all the picture books he could find in the library, just so he could see the expression on Loki's face when he observed the brightly coloured paintings. Thor tried not to think about the future, because suddenly a future without Loki was no longer visible.     ****************     Loki stated mouthing words when Thor read to him. Thor counted this a victory.     ****************     It came to an end quite suddenly. Thor didn't even hear Tyr come to his door, when he was sitting with Loki, slowly going over Loki's favourite book about the Norse gods. Tyr didn't even bother to knock, but barged the door open with both hands and strode into the room. He stopped short when he saw Loki on the bed, hunching over a book. "Well now, what do we have here?" Tyr asked. He sounded nasty and spiteful, and Thor felt himself swelling with rage. "What are you doing here?" He asked. He slammed the book shut and got off the bed, walking towards Tyr. Loki stared at the floor with wide eyes, frozen in shock. "I come to get the whore back for the evening. Didn't you get my message?"  Thor knew that Tyr had sent nothing. "No, there was no message received. Anyway, we agreed that when he is with me he is mine for the evening. You have no right to demand him." "No right?" Tyr laughed. "That thing is mine, gifted to me by your father. It is mine to do with as I please." "Yet, as we agreed, he is mine for the evening! And if I wish to read with him, then I shall!" "Stop calling it 'he'!" Tyr screamed. "I shall call him anything I wish!" "It doesn't need a gender, not when it has both a quim and a cock!" Thor went white with rage. "He is a man, and deserves to be treated as such." Tyr crowed "It is a Jötunn. It deserves nothing." "You will not take him from me, not this night." Tyr pursed his lips, and then sneered at Thor, "You would steal him from me." Thor resisted every fibre of his being from looking at the man on the bed. "Yes." "Well then," Tyr leaned back, "this is a matter of theft, and needs to be dealt with. And since there is a Prince involved, we shall take it before Odin." Quick as a flash, Tyr darted to Thor's bed and grabbed Loki by the elbow, dragging his harshly out of the door and down the hallway. Thor followed after wrapping his cloak around his naked torso. Odin was still holding court when Tyr marched through the doors, Loki struggling to keep up and Thor following closely behind. The man who was petitioning to Odin quickly scurried out of the way. "Odin All-Father, Wisest of All Peoples!" Tyr cried. Thor raised an eyebrow at the greeting, but did not speak. Tyr threw Loki down into the ground in front of the throne. "What is it you want Tyr?" Odin asked, settling back into the throne. Tyr grinned nastily. "A matter of property between myself and the Prince." "Is there any trouble?" Odin asked Thor. Thor opened his mouth to reply before Tyr cut him off. "Yes, I believe Thor seeks to steal my gift from me." "Which gift would that be?" Odin asked. He sounded faintly amused. Tyr pointed to Loki, who had stared shivering in what Thor suspected was downright terror. "That thing, which you gave to me many years ago and which has been used by both myself and the army, as you dictated it should." Upon hearing this, Thor's heart broke, and he finished the task of mentally cutting ties with his father. If this what what Odin did, then he did not want to associate with a man like that. "I seek simply to spend time with him how I see fit Father." Thor said, stepping forward. Odin's sharp gaze shifted, but Thor was no longer cowed. "And what purpose would you have with it, other than to use it for its only purpose?" Odin asked. "They were reading." Tyr hissed. At this, Odin started to laugh, throwing his head back and crying to the ceiling. Thor endured the with a stony face, eyes occasionally flicking towards Loki, whose shivering was getting more and more pronounced.  "Reading?" Odin said finally. "Reading? As if this thing could appreciate words." Odin stood up and walked down the stairs. When he was 3 steps up from the bottom, he put his speak under Loki's chin and lifted his head. "Do you have the intelligence to read?" He cooed sickeningly at Loki. Loki's eyes remained firmly attached to the floor. "Do you even understand what a book is? Why, it must have seemed like you were almost thinking! What a funny illusion!" "Stop it. Stop it now!" Thor said, striding forward and knocking the spear out of the way. Odin looked at Thor in surprise. "How dare you? This man," he gestured to Loki, "this man has been destroyed by what you have done! You, Tyr, the whole of Asgard, and yet, he does not seek repentance when he rightly should! He does not seek revenge! He only seeks to become a person!" "Why should he?" Odin asked, stepping back a fixing Thor with a penetrating stare. "He is Jötunn. Jötunn do not feel as we do. They do not understand as we do. They are little better than animals." "How can you say that, you who have met them, who have conversed with them?" Thor pleaded with his father. "Laufey is hardly a good conversationalist." Odin grumbled. "All he does is ask about his fucking son. As if he couldn't sense that the brat was right under his nose." "What do you mean?" Thor asked cautiously. Even Tyr was hanging on to every word. "That thing," he pointe his spear once again at Loki, "is Laufeys first son, the True Heir of Jötunnheim. And Laufey is too stupid to know that his son has been here the whole time." The hall was silent. Thor remembered, all of a sudden, a crying Helblindi telling Thor about his missing brother.  Loki was the brother.  Loki had a family, one that wanted him. Thor was broken from his musings when he felt something on his ankle. He looked down, about to kick off what he assumed was a spider, when he saw the pale fingers wrapped around his flesh. Loki was touching him, for the first time, of his own volition. Thor's breath stuttered in his chest. "All of this is mute." Tyr said. "The fact of the matter is that the thing is still mine, and I intend to take it back." Odin nodded, and was about to gesture with his spear for Tyr to drag Loki away, when Thor cried "Wait!" Odin and Tyr froze.  "What is it you want?" Odin asked, sounding bored. "I demand that Loki decide who to go with." "What?" Tyr gaped. "That thing doesn't have the wits to make his own decisions." Odin said dismissivly. He was about to gesture with his spear again when Thor physically knocked it away. "I believe that he can." He said doggedly. "Thor, what you say is folly." "You're wrong." "Oh, am I now?" Odin hissed. "I believe that Lo-, the man is capable of making his own decisions, and has been so for a while." 'Ever since he came to me'.  "Thor, we do not have time to indulge in your schemes. I have a Kingdom to run." Odin said. He was getting more and more irritated. "Humor me." Thor said. He felt the fingers on his ankle tighten. Odin gave a great sigh and stepped up the stairs. "Very well, I shall." Tyr looked stumped. "Your Majesty, you cannot possibly indulge this farce!" "My Lord Tyr, the thing will never be able to make any kind of decision. You will have it back, and this can end. Just humour my son, and soon all this will be over." "This is ridiculous." Tyr muttered. Odin then commanded that Thor step to one side of the hall, Tyr the other, and left Loki in the middle. They were then to call to him, and whatever side Loki went to, the man standing there would keep him.  Thor bent down and slowly, released Loki's hand from his ankle. He gave it a quick kiss and then stood up. He heard Loki let out a slight whimper but resolutely ignored that, instead focusing on getting his legs moving. So intense had his fight been with his father that he forgot that there were other people in the hall. They jeered at Loki, who was still on his knees, now rocking slightly and staring at the floor. Odin banged his spear on the floor to indicate Thor and Tyr to begin. "Come here! Come here, you worthless thing! You good for nothing piece of shit, come to your master! You think that you could be anything but a whore, nothing but a cunt on legs! I'll teach you, I'll show you! Jötunn runt, jötunn whore, come here! Come to me, you know what will happen if you don't! I'll punish you, I'll get you! I'll always be able to find you. Remember when you ran, when you were small? I always got you! You can never leave, there is no place, no barren moon that I will not find you! I'll punish you, I always do! COME HERE!"  Tyr was screaming, gesticulating wildly with his arms. Loki remained on the floor, shivering harder. Thor could see a small puddle forming under Loki's head, and he knew Loki was crying. The Hall started to jeer and join in, hurling insults to the kneeling figure. Thor stood still in the flood, his eyes never leaving the figure. He was waiting. It happened, so fleetingly that Thor would have missed it in any other circumstance. But he saw it, saw the moment when Loki turned his head so slightly it looked like it hadn't even moved. Saw the moment Loki's eyelids fluttered. And saw, for the first time, Loki's magnificent green eyes flicker to meet Thor's. It was just for a second, but that one second of precious eye contact was all that Thor needed.  "Loki?" He said softly. "Loki, it's me, Thor. Would you like to come with me? It's alright, all you have to do is walk to me. I'll take care of you. We can read some more, and have as many baths as you want. All you have to do is walk to me. You're strong, Loki, so much stronger than any person here. It's up to you Loki. It's your choice." Thor thought he hadn't been heard, until he saw Loki push himself to his feet. He swayed, and then took one tottering step. Towards Thor. He took another. And another. Thor saw the moment Loki's knees buckled, and rushed to catch him. He held Loki in his arms, and shrugged off his cloak, covering Loki from head to toe. The Hall was completely silent, each person amazed and horrified by what they had just seen. Thor straightened up, cradling Loki in his arms. He looked at the man that had been his Father, and felt nothing but emptiness. "I take this moment," Thor said, his voice resonating, "to announce that I am quitting Asgard from this moment hence. Never again shall I walk these halls. I leave, and will never return of my own volition." "You cannot do that!" Odin said, unfreezing and striding down the stairs. "I can, and I will." Thor turned his back and started to walk down the hall, ignoring the cries from the Warriors Three and Sif. Odin still followed, saying that Thor could not leave. But Thor was leaving. As he passed the entrance to the Hall, he stopped and looked at his mother in the shadows. She was staring at Loki wrapped in red with something akin to disgust on her face. "You allowed this to happen." Thor said to her. "That thing is not a person, it is an animal." She hissed at him. Thor stared at her and then gave her one slow nod. He strode away. Thor would never again speak to his mother. Tyr and Odin followed Thor to the Bifrost, still shouting. "You cheated!" Tyr shouted. "That thing is mine." "I did not cheat." Thor said mildly, securing Loki to his chest and starting to swing Mjolnir. "You cannot leave if you do not have that blasted hammer!" Odin said and reached out a hand to summon it from Thor. But he had forgotten that Mjolnir was no Asgardian weapon, as would not be swayed by anyone other than Thor (and later, Steve Rogers). "You forget, Odin," Thor said, staring over his shoulder at his Once-Father in grim amusement, "Mjolnir was a fallen star, and she chose me. You cannot command her anymore than your general there." "How dare you!" Odin roared, but said nothing more. "I demand you give me back that thing" Tyr said. "I shall not." "Give it to me! Give it to me!" "No." Tyr reached forward and touched Loki's foot, which was exposed from the cloak. Loki shifted and whimpered, and suddenly the skies darkened. The last thing Tyr saw whilst he was alive was a sudden streak of lightening. When the white had cleared from his vision, Odin turned his head and saw Tyr was now nothing more that a little pile of dust. Thor was gone.  He would never return.     ***************     Heimdall was already priming the gateway when Thor arrived. Thor didn't bother to ask if Heimdall had seen anything. Instead, he once again secured Loki to his chest and walked to the swirling gateway. "To Midgard, if you please Heimdall." He asked. Heimdall nodded. Just before he stepped into the vortex, he heard Heimdall cry from behind him "I would have been an honour to serve under you, Your Majesty." Thor turned his head and nodded, before stepping in and leaving Asgard forever.     ===============================================================================       Thor landed on his knees on Stark Tower, and very quickly had to turn Loki over before the man chocked on his own vomit. Loki apparently did not take to travelling that way well, and so Thor's first image of the Avengers since he had last seen them was slightly ruined but him holding back Loki's hair as the man purged himself. "This is anti-climatic." Tony said, sounding mildly irritated. He flicked his arms, and his Iron Man suit disassembled and went back into his Tower. Thor ignored him and continued patting Loki's back as the man heaved and whined, high under his breath. Thor grimaced and turned to Tony. "I am sorry, Anthony, for our sudden arrival." He said. "No problemo, He-Man." Tony said, striding forward. He peered at Loki and then jerked back in surprise. "Is that a man or a walking skeleton? Oh my God, have you managed to bring zombies to my Tower? Are zombies real on Asgard? Is this the Apocalypse?" Tony flailed. Thor raised an eyebrow and stood up. Loki continued to clutch at his cloak. His eyes are focused on Thor's hands, and every so often, his own fingers would twitch. "Nay, Anthony. I have just left Asgard, and I," Thor's shoulders suddenly slumped, and he gazed sadly down at the floor, "I need a place to stay." "Well you have a whole floor here." Tony said slowly. There was an uncomfortable silence, before Tony asked "Why the long face?" Thor looked confused. "Why are you so upset?" Thor gave Tony a grim smile. "I have exiled myself from Asgard. I am no longer of that race." "Whoa." Tony said softly. He turned and walked back into the Tower, Thor following behind. They entered the main living area, and Tony asked over his shoulder "So who's the stick man?" "This is Loki." Thor said, hefting him slightly. Loki sighed and snuggled deeper into the cloak. "Okaaaaay." Tony said slowly. He walked behind his bar and poured himself a stiff drink. When Thor did not elaborate, Tony gestured. "And who is Loki? Brother, friend, obscure relative?" "Loki is," Thor hesitated and gently placed Loki down into the sofa. He brushed an errant lock of hair from Loki's sleeping face and gently cupped Loki's cheek. he then released him but didn't look away. "Loki is...Loki." "Explain." Thor shrugged helplessly. "I do not know how." He felt, for the first time on his life, completely helpless. He had fled Asgard with nothing but the clothes he wore, and the man that he couldn't be without in his arms. The enormity of his situation hit him for the first time, and suddenly his legs gave out. He collapsed to the floor, and his chest contracted. "Thor!" Tony cried in alarm and set down his drink. He ran to Thor's side and grasped his arm. "Buddy, you gotta breathe." Thor heaved his breath, tears stinging his eyes. But he didn't cry, for he had long vowed that any tears he did spill would be for Loki only, and never for himself. Tony murmured platitudes, patting Thor's back until the man was able to seat himself upright, kneeling and looking at Loki, wrapped in his cloak and sleeping. "Better?" Tony asked. Thor nodded. "Good. Now, have this," he shoved a full glass of whisky into Thor's hand, "sit on the couch and tell me what that was all about." Thor sat on the sofa, next to where Loki lay. He gently placed Loki's slim feet on his lap, and laid a hand over them, making sure that even in his sleep Loki knew that Thor was there. Thor took a sip, and made a face at the burn. He pondered about what to tell Tony, and then decided to be honest. "I have exiled myself from Asgard. As of an hour ago, I am currently homeless." "Not homeless. Go on." Tony gestured with his hand. He looked intrigued. "I...left. For him." Thor gestured to Loki. "And for myself. I think." "Why? You're Prince of Asgard. you had everything. I mean, you had things that people down here dreamed of!" "I wasn't Prince when I left. I had been made Regent." Tony nearly spat out his drink. "You were King? And you gave that all up for the Walking Dead?" "Don't!" Thor said, suddenly furious. "Don't say that about him." He set down his now empty glass and ran his hands though his hair. His fingers caught on the snarls and the tangled plaits, and in a fit of frustration, the undid all of the braids, so that, for the first time on years, his hair fell naturally. Braids in his hair had been something from Asgard. He was starting anew. He might as well start with something small. Tony leaned back and looked at Thor. He knew the signs of becoming someone totally different, he may as well help Thor with his own transition. He nodded to Loki. "Who is he?" he asked again. Thor sighed into his hands. "He was a prisoner of Asgard. I have taken him from that life, but in doing so, I managed to alienate an entire Realm." "Not bad." Thor laughed weakly. "So a prisoner. What did he do?" Tony asked. He was cautiously intrigued. "He was born." Tony frowned. "That seems a bit of an exaggeration. What did he really do?" Thor gave Tony a small, sad smile. "I wish I could change the answer, but the fact of the matter is that he was born to a conquered race, and taken by a cruel King when he was just a babe. He has spent his entire life in the service of Asgard's Army, and has known no other life." Tony winced. "I gotta say, seems a little skinny for a guy who's spent his entire life fighting." Tony would have expected muscles, not scraps of flesh clinging to bone. Thor looked dead in the eyes. "He has never fought, never raised a weapon. He served in other ways." Tony felt himself go cold. He looked at Loki, asleep, and now saw instead the ruins of a man, who had lived in Hell. "He wasn't a soldier." Thor shook his head. "He was a whore." Thor winced but nodded again. "And you say he has been doing this his entire life? Please, not as a kid."  Thor didn't say anything. Tony slammed his hand down on the coffee table and stood up. "Fuck!" He ran hands through his hair. Then he whirled around, pointing at Thor and pulling his lips back in a grimace. "Don't tell me you did that to him, because I swear to God, if you laid a finger on him I'm throwing you off the Tower myself!" Thor held up his hands. "Nay, Anthony! I never touched him like that. I would sooner send myself directly to Hel than do that to him!" Tony continued to breathe heavily, but calmed down enough to sit down. He rubbed his hands, and then rubbed his lips, trying to drive away the sudden taste of bile. "So how do you know him?" he asked Thor. "He was pushed on to me, with the erroneous impression that I would do to him what others had. I chose instead to first ignore him, and then to try and educate him. But," he said, leaning back, "I was first made aware of him when I was a young boy." "You were a kid when you met him?" "No. I simply knew that there was a being my own age running around in the army. I didn't meet him until only a few years ago." "That's fucked up." "Indeed it is." There was a silence, as both men absorbed the information. It was only when the figure in red moved and made a soft sighing sound that Thor was roused from his stupor. He knelt by Loki's head, and stroked his hair softly. "Welcome back, Loki." He whispered. Loki moved his head like a cat under Thor's fingers, but didn't meet his eyes. Instead they darted around the room, and widened when they settled on Tony. His breath started to speed up, and he made small motions with his legs to try and move away. "Loki, Loki, do not be afraid!" Thor soothed. "This is my friend. This is his home. You are safe. You know I would never take you anywhere you might be in danger." Loki was still breathing hard, but his eyes had ester on Thor's chin, and he was breathing in time with Thor. Looking at them, Tony felt his heart squeeze. He gave Loki a non-threatening smile and continued to stay away. "Good man. Good, gentle Loki." Thor stroked Loki's hair, and whispered kind things in his ears. Loki, Thor was glad to note, no longer looked surprised when Thor called him kind things. He merely took them as his due, for he had learned, in a small part of his brain, that Thor would never be anything to him other than loving. "You mentioned that I have a floor, Anthony?" Thor asked, never taking his eyes from Loki. Tony looked at him and nodded.  "Yeah, couple of levels down." Thor nodded and stood up. He was about to pick Loki up in his arms, to go to his floor, when Tony placed a hand on his arm. "Thor, I don't know about Asgard, but Loki really needs to see a doctor." He murmured in a low voice. "I cannot take him to a physician, all of the trust that I have would be erased instantly." Thor murmured back. However, Tony knew of one doctor he could actually trust. "Bruce is here, he could see Loki." Thor looked at Tony is surprise. "I was under the impression that Bruce was not a medical doctor, but one of science." Tony winced but carried on. "Yeah, but he's picked up a lot of medical knowledge, living on his own, and he keeps up to date. He doesn't think I know that, but he does. He's the man to go to." Thor looked at Loki, and remembered the nights he had spent awake, staring at Loki and counting every breath that he had struggled for. Afraid that, if he went to sleep and lost his vigil, he would wake up next to a corpse. Thor nodded and scooped Loki up, who nestled his head against Thor's shoulder and continued to look anywhere but at Tony.  Tony didn't bother being offended. He knew how Loki felt. Tony led the way to the floor he has assigned of medical. Thor looked interested in the elevator, but stared at Loki like he had held the world. Tony hummed under his breath and strode out of the doors when they reached the assigned floor. "Bruce!" he called. The man in question popped his curly head out of an open door. He smiled when he saw Thor, but almost immediately frowned when he saw the man in Thor's arms. "Is that a man?" Bruce asked, coming out of the room and wiping his hands. Thor nodded. "Is Thor here?" called out a voice and Clint Barton came out behind Bruce. He had several bandages about his face and stitches in his eyebrows. Tony raised his eyebrow and opened his mouth to ask. Clint got there first. "Broke a window with my face. Classified." Tony pouted. "Clint, I see you have recovered from the Others invasion of your mind. I am glad to see that." Clint smile at Thor lessened a bit in intensity, but grew in warmth.  "Cheers." "Thor, is that a man in your arms?" Bruce asked, trying to come closer. Their stepped back. "I would not advise that." He warned. Bruce frowned at him. He tried to ask again but Tony grabbed him by the elbow and dragged him away slightly. There was a hurried, whispered conversation, before Bruce turned back to Thor. He didn't move any closer but looked at Thor with sudden understanding. "Thor, would you be so kind as to follow me?" He asked and moved down the corridor. Thor followed, whilst Tony and Clint hung back. He heard Clint ask a question to Tony, and looked over his shoulder at them. Tony looked at him and shrugged, and after a moment Thor nodded slowly. He would have preferred it that Loki's past have remained secret, but even he recognised that having an unknown man in the Tower with a secret past was a bad move, considering the immensely paranoid people that he now lived with. Thor followed Bruce to a clean and pleasant room. There was soft music playing in the background, and the walls were painted a beautiful shade of light blue. There was a comfortable bed, not a hospital bed, but one with a nice wooden frame. The duvet and pillow had pale green covers, and Thor gently laid Loki on them. Loki was still covered by the cloak, but his body softened when he lay in the bed. Thor kneeled beside him and held his hand. Bruce did not move closer, but told Thor softly to remove the cloak so that Bruce could examine him. "Loki?" Thor said. Loki's head twitched. "I need to remove the cloak so that one of my friends can examine you." Loki immediately tensed.  "No, no, Loki!" Thor sounded slightly desperate. "No pain, and nothing else. I promise you. You must trust me, you know I would never hurt you. And when my friend is finished, we can go and read." Loki's eyes landed on Thor's chin. He looked cautiously interested. Thor knew that the promise of books was something that Loki held dear, and so continued to speak of books when he unwrapped the cloak gently and took of from Loki. Loki shivered in fear, but kept looking at Thor. "Fucking hell." Thor heard Bruce swear softly. Thor had long become acclimatised to Loki's body, but to a person first seeing it, it was still a horrible sight. Thor, in his conversations with Steve Rogers, had been made aware of institutions known as 'Concentration Camps', which had housed people seen as different during the war that Steve had fought in. He had seen pictures of those brave and wonderful souls who had survived such hardships. He knew that Loki looked somewhat similar to those people. But, and Thor's heart sank when he saw it, Loki's belly was hard and slightly rounded, and Thor knew that Loki was once again pregnant. But if this time, he had managed to get Loki to safety... For the first time in his life, Loki might actually see a pregnancy through to the end. Thor's spirit lightened slightly. Bruce came closer slowly, and stopped in froth of Loki. He spoke softly and showed Loki his hands. "Loki, my name is Bruce Banner. I'm a friend of Thor's. I would like to examine you." Loki's expression closed off, and he opened his legs, wide as he could. Thor closed his eyes and swallowed a sob, and he heard Bruce start to breathe deeply. Thor stroked Loki's fingers and his face as Bruce quickly examined Loki. Loki shivered, and his throat constantly moved. Bruce murmured to himself as he examined Loki, but as he put his fingers into the slit between Loki's legs for a quick internal examination, his voice quickly rose in panic. Thor looked over and saw Bruce bring his hand up.  It was covered in blood. "I need help!" Bruce called. Nurses from other rooms came to Bruce, who wadded up some gauze and pressed it hard between Loki's legs. Loki himself was staring wide eyes at the ceiling, panting. Thor didn't move, frozen in horror. Loki was safe now. This wasn't supposed to happen. He reached out a hand, but it was quickly slapped away by a nurse who was trying to get Loki to sit up. Another nurse grabbed Thor's arm and started to drag him from the room. Thor stride to resist when he saw Loki reach out a thin hand and weakly reach for him, but the nurse continued to drag him away. "Only medical personal allowed." Said the nurse. "But Loki only knows me." Thor protested. The nurses gaze softened but she did not relent. "He needs medical help and you would just be in our way. You need to wait." She shoved him out into the corridor and closed the door. Thor stood daring dumbly at the wood before Tony came up and tapped him on the shoulder. "Whats happened?" Tony asked. "Loki is in trouble." Thor answered faintly. He sounded like his voice was coming from a very long way away. "Is he dying?" Thor hoped he wasn't, but couldn't answer. Tony sat down on the floor and Thor followed him. Clint had left earlier, to go and rest. Thor leaned his head back against the wood and closed his eyes. "So, Loki, huh? Kind of a weird name. I mean, he's nothing like the mythology says so." Tony said after a while. Thor didn't move his head. "The name is one I gave him. He wasn't born with it." "What?" Tony asked, looking confused. "Loki, up until recently, was know as 'it'. I gave him the name Loki three years ago." "But you've only been gone two years." Tony said in disbelief. "Time flows differently on Asgard. For me, I have been gone an entire decade." Tony was silent for a long time, before saying softly. "You gave him a name." "I gave him a name." "You gave him an identity." Thor nodded. "Sounds to me," Tony said slowly, "that Loki is a damn lucky man to have you." Thor opened his eyes and looked at Tony with a small smile. "I hope so, my friend. I hope so." Hours passed, and still the door did not open. It was in the early morning before the door opened and Bruce came out, wiping his hands. Thor stood up quicky, but stopped when he saw the defeated expression on Bruce's face. "Loki lost the baby. I'm so sorry." He said quietly. "But...but..." Thor said helplessly. "He was safe, he didn't have the poison. There was no reason." "His body went in to shock, and, due to his previous miscarriages, he aborted the fetus." Bruce shook his head. "He will never have children naturally. His body won't be able to handle it." Thor gasped and went in to the room, where Loki lay sleeping on the bed. It was an induced sleep, and he had an IV attached to his arm. Someone, probably Bruce, had bundled up Thor's cloak and slipped it under Loki's head, so that he might be able to smell Thor in his sleep. Thor sat down gently on the bed and took Loki's hand in his own. Out of the corner of his eye, Bruce closed the door after explaining things to Tony, who looked at Loki with shocked and saddened eyes. Thor looked down at Loki's face, slack with slumber. His eyelashes were still caked together with tears, and Thor could feel his own rising to his eyes. He gently laid down beside Loki, still clutching his hand. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I thought you were going to be safe. I thought it was all going to be better." Thor wept. Loki stirred in his sleep and turned his head towards Thor. His breath fluttered gently out of his lips. Thor spent the night with Loki, holding his hand.     ****************     The next morning, Loki was moved to Thor's floor, still attached to the IV and with a new meal plan. Bruce had told Thor quietly that Loki had almost been past the point of no return when it came to his weight. "8 days, maybe a couple of weeks." Bruce said, shaking his head. "Any time after that, and he would have become too starved to have properly absorbed any nutrients. He would have died." Thor made Loki's meals in the wonderful invention called a blender, and coaxed Loki to drink them. But Loki had become shell-shocked again, and spent days staring at the wall. He didn't even react when Thor brought out his newly acquired picture books.  Thor despaired. He had hoped for something new, but all he was getting was the same old results. In a last ditch attempt, Thor unhooked Loki from his IV and brought him to the steam room a few floors down. He had thought that the idea of a bath would be something that might entice Loki out of his stupor, but he got nothing. Gently he tugged Loki into his arms, and wept into his hair. He wondered if it might be better if Loki was indeed dead.     ****************     Steve entered the Tower after a nasty fight with some neo-Nazi punks, and was using his floor to convalesce until the heat was off his back. He thought some time in the steam room might loosen his shoulders, and so slung his towel over his shoulder and walked to the floor. He opened the door and was about to enter when he saw Thor sitting by the edge of the pool with someone. His heart immediately squeezed tightly. The man with the black hair was sitting on the wooden edge of the pool, his right leg dangling in the water, his left leg bent at the knee. He was rail thin, and one arm was slung lightly across his stomach. The other was clutching his hair tightly, and Steve could see that it had a large open sore on the inside of the forearm. The man was staring blankly at the water, his pointed ears doing nothing to keep his hair back, with tumbled into his wide, dispairing green eyes. Thor was sitting behind him, pulling him gently so that he rested against Thor's chest, his legs either side. Thor's arms were around Loki's waist, and he was resting his face in the man's hair. Steve could hear Thor faintly whispering, and suddenly felt out of place. Steve left the steam room. He closed the door gently behind him and went back to his own bedroom, where he went to bed and stared for hours at the ceiling, the look on the man's face covering the true depth of utter despair.     ***************     Steve saw Thor the next day, in the communal living area. The man with the black hair was seated on the sofa, wearing nothing but Thor's red cloak. He was once again staring blankly at the floor. Thor ran a hand through his tangled hair and nearly jumped when Steve greeted him quietly. "Steve, I did not see you." Thor said softly. Steve smiled at him gently. "I heard we have a new guest." Steve said. He walked to the coffee maker and pressed the button, quickly drawing out two cups. He finished making coffee and took a cup to Thor, who was sitting on the floor by the man's feet. Thor took the cup gratefully and sipped it, looking sadly at the man's bare ankles. Steve took a seat beside Thor. "Who is this?" he asked softly. The man didn't even twitch. "Loki. He is Loki." Thor said. He reached out with his spare hand and wrapped it around Loki's ankle. Loki moved softly and buried further into the cloak. Steve observed this but didn't do anything. "Is he your friend?" Steve said. Thor laughed softly. "He is more than that." Steve raised an eyebrow. "Oh, is he your lover?" Steve rather liked the progressive attitude of the 21st century. He could say he had been in love with Bucky and no on would take him to jail for it. The idea that men could love other men openly was refreshing. Thor shook his head. "No, he is not that. Loki is Loki." He shrugged helplessly. "I don't really have any other words to describe that." Steve nodded and gazed at Loki, who had his head buried in the cloak with only a tuft of hair sticking out and green eyes fixed on the floor. Steve had been informed of Loki's in depth history by Tony earlier that day, and so knew that Loki was suffering from both a loss of self and severe PTSD. Steve could sympathise, because he too suffered from the same affliction. "I'm sorry, Loki, that you lost your baby." Steve said, directly to Loki. There was a whisper, and Loki's head further retreated into the cloak. Now all that could be seen were his pale feet. Steve looked at Thor, who was in turn looking at Steve with a slight frown. "What?" Steve asked, feeling defensive. Thor shook his head and gestured to the kitchen. Steve followed and when he was sure they were out of Loki's hearing. "What did I do?" "You are the first person to talk to him and have him react." Now Steve frowned. "The others have talked to him?" Thor nodded. "Bruce when he examines him, Tony, Pepper, even Clint. He doesn't react. But you, he reacted to you." "That's strange." Steve murmured. He was feeling distinctly nonplussed. "Indeed." They stood in silence before a faint questioning sound from the sofa caused Thor to put down his cup and move towards Loki. Loki had unwrapped his head and was looking in Thor's direction. Not at Thor's face, but in the direction of the kitchen. Thor sat down by Loki's head and gently took and hand in his. "I was with my friend." He explained gently. Loki looked at his chin, and then back the kitchen. His eyes moved to where Steve stood, and then quickly looked away, back at his hands. But Steve got the impression that Loki had given him a quick once-over, probably to check if he was threatening. He didn't know whether he had passed the test, until Loki jerked his head minutely in Steve's direction and made an enquiring sound in the back of his throat. "That is Steve Rogers. He is a close friend, and the leader of the Avengers. I told you about them yesterday, do you remember?" Thor said softly. Loki nodded slowly. His eyes flickered back to Steve and Steve took the opportunity to move closer, until he was sitting on the arm of the sofa and staring down kindly at Loki wrapped in Thor's cloak. Loki's eyes were darting everywhere, but eventually they landed on Steve's chest and stayed there. "Hello, Loki. I'm Steve."  Loki licked his lips and his eyes darted to Steve's chin. Steve's smiled widened. Thor gave Steve a tremulous smile and gripped Loki's hand all the more tighter. Loki was looking at someone of his own accord. This is such progress that Thor almost wanted to sing with joy. "I fight with Thor." Steve explained. Loki twisted his head and frowned slightly. Thor realised that he didn't have a reference for comrades that fought willingly. His only point of reference when it came to fighting was that of an army, who had been forced into service, not individual men who had chosen it.  "We fight monsters." This proved to be a bad thing to say, as Loki blanched and weakly moved backwards away from Steve. Thor knew that Loki had been called a monster all his life, when he had not been called other things, and as such, he assumed that Steve fought and killed people like him. Steve looked suddenly confused and directed a worried glance at Thor, who surged up onto the sofa and put his arm round Loki's shoulders, trying to calm him down. "No Loki, never people like you!" Thor murmured into tangled black hair. "No one in this Tower will hurt you, I promise you. We fight monsters like the ones on Asgard, we fight invaders and terrible people! Not like you." Loki eventually stopped shaking. He looked at Thor, and then looked at Steve, who was staring at him in horrified concern. One hand was outstretched, and Steve's fingers itched to run comforting trails through Loki's hair. Thor continued to rock Loki softly from side to side, and Loki stared at Steve. Steve had never seen a man look so confused. Slowly, so slowly, Loki leaned forward and reached out a hand. He gently ran a finger down the back of Steve's outstretched hand, and carefully encircled Steve's middle finger. Steve realised that he hadn't managed to wash all of the paint off, and Loki seemed fascinated as to why it was a different colour. Thor looked at Steve, suddenly delighted. "Steve paints." Loki opened his mouth in surprise, and didn't release Steve's finger. Steve looked at Thor in confusion, who grinned back at him, unrepentant. Loki continued to look Steve's hand, twisting it each way to see it in different lights. "What?" Steve mouthed at Thor, who shook his head and mouthed "Later" back. Loki finally released Steve's hand and leaned back into Thor's chest, closing his eyes and breathing evenly until he fell asleep. Thor laid Loki down gently, pulled Steve into the kitchen and explained about the books. About Loki's face when he saw brightly coloured pictures, and how he would make Thor linger over those pages, running fingers across mythical (or not so mythical) figures. The next morning, Loki was staring at the wall when Steve strode on to the communal floor, a canvas under one arm and his painting supplies in the other. A bag across his bag contained his most current sketchbooks. "Hello Loki." Steve said. Loki turned his head, then looked sharply at Steve. His eyes were wide as they saw the paints, and he shifted in his seat, Thor's cloak sliding down one shoulder and exposing his chest. Steve swallowed when he saw the scar tissue and smiled all the wider at Loki. "Thor told me that you like painting."  Loki didn't move, but his eyes never strayed from the box of paints. He seemed to be licking his lips frantically. "I thought I might do some in here, if you don't mind." Steve set up his canvas and opened his paints. He then removed his bag and took out his sketchbooks, laying them down in front of Loki, whose gaze instead switched to them. One trembling hand reached forward and stroked the cover of the oldest sketchbook, form when he and just woken up from the ice. "You can look at them, if you want." Steve said. He sat down on his stool, facing the New York skyline, and selected his base coats. Behind him, he could hear the rustle of pages moving. They spent a quiet afternoon together. Steve occasionally talked to Loki about life before the war, and whenever he turned around, Loki would either be looking at the sketchbooks, or at the canvas Steve was painting. One one occasion, Steve turned around and found that Loki had multiple sketchbooks open, all at drawings of Bucky. He seemed to be frowning at the pages. "That's my best friend, Bucky." Steve said with a tight smile. He set down his brushes and moved to the sofa. Loki scooted away but didn't fall into a panic. "He's dead. He's been dead for a long time." Loki's long fingers traced the edge of Bucky's cheek. Steve felt tears spring to his eyes. "I miss him a lot."  Steve turned back to his painting, but a hand caught the edge of his t-shirt. He turned back to find Loki reaching out, taking his hand in his own black nailed fingers. Loki licked his lips then gave Steve's hand a tight squeeze before releasing it and turning the page in the sketchbook, to a portrait of Natasha sipping from a beer bottle. Steve swallowed around the lump in his throat and went back to his painting. In the doorway, unseen by either of them, Thor released a held breath and smiled in joy. Loki was finally reaching out to others. That night, as Thor curled up with Loki, Loki reached out and rubbed a strand of Thor's hair in his fingertips. He then looked at the door and stroked the invisible air. "You're right, Steve does have blond hair as well." Thor said softly. Loki then touched Thor's eyelid. "And blue eyes." Loki frowned for a moment in thought, and then slowly pushed himself so that he lay in Thor's arms. Loki settled his head on Thor's shoulder and closed his eyes. Thor relayed this information to Steve, who, the next time he saw Loki, stroked Loki's hair the same way he had seen Thor do so. Loki in turned rubbed a strand of Steve's hair. Painting soon became a prominent feature of the communal floor, with various Avengers and S.H.I.E.L.D staff coming in and admiring the paintings Steve produced, several of which were donated to the city gallery anonymously. In his sketchbooks, he started drawing the Avengers in everyday life, for example: -Tony in his lab, screwdrivers behind both ears and his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth in concentration. -Bruce sleeping face down on his newspaper on the morning, hand still maintaing a death grip on his cup of coffee. -Clint reading stretched out on top of a bookcase, feet dangling on one end and head dangling off the other. -Natasha cleaning knives by the sofa, hair in pigtails and legs stretched out with toes freshly painted. -Thor flipping pancakes, and staring bemused at the one stuck on the ceiling from when he had been too enthusiastic with his flip. -Loki, curled up in Thor's red cloak, watching Lord of the Rings with a wide eyed expression of wonder. -(Bucky dancing in their old apartment, face shining and mouth open, calling "Steve, come dance with me!") Steve would paint, or draw, and the others soon followed. In those brief months, the Avengers became closer than any family. For all of them, it was something new.     ****************     Thor eyed the sleeping trousers hanging from his hands, and then looked at Loki, who was also eyeing them with mistrust. It had been 2 months since Thor had landed on the roof, and Bruce had announced that he was pleased with the weight Loki had gained, and that now it was time for Loki to try and put on clothes. Thor was worried as to how Loki would take it, because as for as he was aware, Loki had never worn a stitch of clothing in his life. He seemed to be quite happy wearing Thor's cloak, but even Thor could see that Loki would now need to wear clothes. But he had envisioned starting with a large sleep shirt, not going on straight into trousers. Thor was worried that Loki would find them constricting, and misinterpret them as another controlling device. The sleeping trousers themselves were grey, and made of some of the softest material Thor had ever known. Thor shook them out and laid them beside Loki, who continued to eye them. His mistrust did not stem for fear of the unknown however. It was borne out of precious disappointment. He had never been allowed clothes, and every time he had been offered them, they had been cruelly snatched out of his fingers with jeering smiles and mocking laughs. Loki released Thor's cloak from about his shoulders and let it puddle around his waist. He reached out and stroked the material of the trousers. "It's up to you." Thor said, sitting down beside Loki. Loki ignored him. "You can wear them, or not. I won't force you." Loki stoppe stroking the trousers and flicked a glance at Thor. He manoeuvred carefully so that the cloak no longer covered him and grasped thew trousers, holding them out to Thor. Thor gave Loki a bright smile and laid them out in his hands. He took Loki's right leg and pulled the grey cotton softly up it. He did the same with the other leg and then took Loki by the hands, bringing him to his feet and pulling up the waist so that it sat on Loki's hips. He tightened the drawstring and then stood back, admiring the view. "They look good on you." Thor said, smiling brightly. Loki walked slowly to the full length mirror and fixed his eyes on his now covered legs. He twisted, feeling the material whisp against his skin, and wriggled his toes into the soft carpet. The trousers were slightly too long, and bunched on top of his feet. "Does it feel better, to be clothed?" Thor ask, coming up behind Loki and resting a gentle hand on his shoulder. Loki's eyes met Thor's chin n the mirror and he gave a single sharp nod. He was getting better at communication, and being allowed to express his feelings, but he still didn't speak. Bruce had quietly admitted to Thor that Loki may never speak, both due to the nature of his trauma and also because, simply, he had never learned how to. Thor walked back to the bed and took the cloak, draping it gently around Loki's shoulders like a shawl. Loki immediately grasped the fabric in his hands and arraigned it so that it covered his chest. "Come, we shall have breakfast." Thor said, turning and walking out of the room. He knew that Loki would follow him, mainly because now he was getting regular meals, Loki never missed an opportunity to eat. Thor make Loki's breakfast smoothie, and a slice of toast, and set about making himself eggs and bacon. Thor enjoyed the more varied diet that Midgard offered, as Asgard was a bit of a one trick pony when it came to food and eating. You tended to get the same meals over and over again. But here, Thor was able to eat such a wide variety of things that he had take-away almost every night. Loki drank his smoothie, and was settling down to eat his toast when Natasha strolled in. It was one of her rare days off, and she often shared breakfast with whoever was up, because Clint wouldn't surface much before midday, and even when he did, it was akin to talking to a zombie. "Morning, fellas." She said. She gave Loki's hair a single stroke (which he followed like a cat) and settled down beside him. Thor automatically doubled the amount of food he was cooking, and soon settled down a plate of crispy bacon and fluffy eggs with toast in front of Natasha as he made the same plate of himself. Natasha dumped an inhuman amount of sugar onto her plate and started eating. Loki had finished his toast and was eyeing Natasha's bacon in what he thought was a covert way, but Natasha could see him out of the corner of her eye. She turned and made a great (unbelievable) show of talking to Thor about sparing that day, and when she saw Thor's expression light up in a grin, she knew that she was going to be a few strips of bacon down when she turned back. Sure enough, when she re-focued on her plate, she was completely bacon-less, and Loki was trying to chew crispy bacon subtly. It wasn't really working. She grinned and tapped Loki's bulging cheeks. "You look like an angry chipmunk." She said. Thor chocked on his eggs and laughed loudly. Loki looked at Natasha as he always looked at women. With slight confusion. He seemed easier around them than men, because no women had ever really come into his cloistered world on Asgard (with the notable exception of Sif, who had merely pulled his hair the one time he had come close). So women confused him, and he chose to study them. Maria Hill had been shocked when she had opened the door of Avengers Tower, intent on giving Steve a mission debriefing, and suddenly found her hair loose and flowing between pale fingers as Loki examined it. She had stood very still and let him, because she had some idea as to why Loki would be so intrigued by long hair. She had sat down on the nearest chair and allowed Loki his examination of her face, not moving as he slowly touched her slightly softened cheeks and her large eyes. When he put his hand on her breast, she had jumped and gently moved his hand away, explaining in soft words what they was and generally what they was for. Naturally her eyes had moved to the scar tissue on Loki's own chest, and she had winced in anger. Maria had eventually forgot what she had been there for, and had spent the afternoon with Loki's head in her lap as they watched cartoons. When she reported to Fury later, she couldn't even remember why she had been in the Tower in the first place. Bruce had sat down with Loki afterwards and gently handed his anatomy diagrams of men and women, explaining to the confuse dyeing the difference and quickly reassuring him that in no way was he a freak. For Loki, it had been a jam-packed afternoon. Natasha finished her breakfast and cleaned her plate, offering to take Loki to the communal floor so that she and Thor could go sparing. Loki was getting better at being left with other people and letting Thor go, as long as he had Thor's cloak with him. Natasha took Loki gently by the elbow and walked him to the elevator, where they exited to Steve painting, from memory, his neighbourhood in Brooklyn as he remembered it. Steve turned and smiled at Loki. "It's good to see you, Loki." He said. Loki wandered over and stroked strands of Steve's hair, his preferred greeting. He then released Steve and sat down on the sofa, his current picture book resting beside some juice. "You're wearing pants. That's good progress." Steve smiled at him, turning away from his painting. Loki looked at Steve's chin and nodded. They spent a quiet afternoon together, with Loki slowly looking at his book and sipping his juice, and Steve painting his neighbourhood. Steve would occasionally stop painting and turn around to Loki, showing him bits of the drying canvas and tell Loki stories about a particular building, or where Steve and Bucky had managed to save enough nickels to by a real bottle of coke. He told Loki about a boy with a should stronger than the sun, and the friend he protected against bullies and against himself. Steve had the feeling that Loki and Bucky would have got on quite well. Thor came through the door and smiled at the tableau that they made. He wandered over to the sofa and stroked Loki's head, who immediately shuffled over and plonked his book down on Thor's lap. Thor slung an arm around Loki's shoulders and pulled him closer, where upon Loki snuggled his head into Loki's shoulder. Thor no longer needed to read out loud to Loki, as Loki was getting good at recognising words on his own. He could now pick out 'Loki', 'Thor', 'Mjolnir', 'Jötunn', 'Fire', and 'Magic'. Steve finished dabbing his painting and wiped his brushes off with an old t- shirt. He joined them on the sofa, sandwiching Loki between them as they all looked at the book in Thor's lap. "How was sparing with Natasha?" Steve asked. "It is a great relief to be able to spar with someone and not have to hold back, for fear of hurting them." Thor admitted. "Perhaps I should join you." Steve said. "The only work out I'm getting these days is against vintage punching bags, and eve then I'm winning." "It sounds like you also need to spar with someone and not hold back. Maybe tomorrow we shall go down to the gymnasium and see how strong you really are." Thor grinned at Steve, and Steve gave a delighted grin back. "Sounds like a challenge." They sat in silence for a moment, before Thor stretched and said "Would you like to watch a movie?" Steve nodded. "What do you feel like?" "Something with massive property damage, a small plot and unreasonably attractive people starring." There was a pause. "Michael Bay movie?" Thor nodded. "Michael Bay movie." Steve stood up and then offered his hand to Loki. "Loki, fancy coming with me to make some popcorn." Loki hesitated briefly before placing his hand gently in Steve's and allowing himself to be guided to the kitchen. Thor set up the movie and by the time the popcorn was done, the beginning was playing at the lights were muted. Bt the time the first movie ended, the rest of the Avengers had joined them, and there was a spirited discussion as to who was more of a bad-ass, Optimus Prime or Bumblebee. In the middle sat Loki, staring at them all, and for the first time in his life, he felt safe.     *************     Loki wearing clothes was a massive positive step, and was soon joined by Loki wearing shirts (silk so that it didn't irritate his sensitive chest), and skinny jeans, which everyone blamed Natasha for and for which she would never repent. Thor's cloak turned into a long, red scarf, because Loki was loathe to go anywhere without it, and Thor preferred having that price with Loki at all times, when he could not be there. Loki still had bare feet, because Loki had spent his whole life not wearing any shoes, and as a result his soles were hard as leather, and the skin didn't even break, not when he walked across broker glass as had happened a few times. Now that he was finally reading, he was soon being taught, slowly, how to write. Often he would sit down with Steve (who was an artist and therefore used to following lines), and would gently trace over the dotted lines with his own pen, tongue licking his lips in concentration. They all quickly discovered that Loki was ambidextrous, and which hand he would use that day would indicate what kind of day he was having. If he was using his right hand, then it was a good day, and he would be willing to curl up with anyone. If it was his left hand, it was a bad day, and Thor would always be by Loki's side, and his cloak would be wrapped around Loki like a shawl, and would sometimes shield his head and face. Loki's first word free-hand was 'Thor', which Thor had framed and put up above their bed. As the Avengers actually had more days off than days actually working, there was always someone to be with Loki during the day so that Thor could go off to the gym and not worry about Loki. The first person that Loki truly tolerated, apart from Steve, was Clint. It did help that Clint looked like Steve and Thor, with blond hair and blue eyes, although not as well built. Clint soon found a sounding board in Loki, because Loki would never talk back, and he knew what it was like to be under someones thrall. He would often sit with Loki, sometimes with Natasha, sometimes on his own. He sat on the floor, priming his bow or cleaning his arrows, and if Natasha was there with him, she would have Loki's feet on her lap, painting his toenails as Clint bitched about whatever television series had caught his eye. But if he was alone, then he would talk to Loki about being a slave to the Other, when he ad come through. About how he could always feel Clint Barton screaming at the back of his mind, bagging and crying to get through and to stop the atrocities which he had committed. He understood what it felt like to lose an identity, to be reduced to nothing. And he knew that Loki would never judge him, would never tell him to stop, even if he could, because Loki understood. One time, he fell asleep on the floor and woke up to find someone (Loki) had put a pillow under his head. And that was when he knew Loki had got it, and would always understand. Bruce was the first of the non-blonds to get through to Loki. He still acted as his doctor, and so would often be seen around Loki, checking his vocals and making sure that Loki aways had someone with him. He was also acting as Loki's teacher, when Steve couldn't do it, because he had the patience of a saint. Bruce was a calming soul, and if Thor couldn't be there in the mornings for Loki (a rare occurrence), then it would be up to Bruce to help Loki out. He would wake Loki up slowly and then lead him to get weighed, making sue that Loki's weight gain was always charted down incase of any anomalies. He would them make Loki his breakfast and then lead him to the bathroom so that Loki might get washed, but always with the door open. When Loki was finished and dried, Bruce would lead him down to the communal living area, where all of his materials would already be laid out. If Bruce had to spend the day in the lab, he always made sure that an Avenger was free to watch Loki, as Bruce didn't fully trust him on his own. As well as reading and writing, Bruce had also started Loki on simple mathematics, but had had to step up to advanced algebra when Loki was shown an aptitude for maths. Bruce enjoyed teaching, enjoyed watching new minds absorb information, and teaching Loki was a pleasant experience, because Loki always approached his tasks with an air of awe and wonder that Bruce had thought lost. Loki was now well past picture books, and had started on tomes. Bruce had given him the Harry Potter series, which Loki was tearing through. He couldn't wait to see what happened when they showed Loki the films. After his time watching them, Natasha was the next Avenger and first women that Loki next got comfortable with. His initial fascination of Natasha stemmed from two sources, first: that she was a women, and second: that she had red hair. Red hair wasn't common on Asgard, and for women to have it even less so. In fact, in all his years in the army, Loki had never seen another person with hair as red at Natasha's. And initially, that was where he looked. Whilst he looked at the men on their chin or at their hands, he looked at Natasha and focused on her hair. As he grew more comfortable around the Avengers, he would occasionally reach out and stroke Natasha's hair, over and over again with an expression of wonder. Natasha in turn would often take these opportunities to write up her mission reports, paint Loki's nails, or simply sit in front of him as he played with different hairstyles. If she was with Clint, she would be funny and sarcastic, but on her own, she was silent and pliable. It was very soothing, being with Loki. Tony's interactions with Loki were slightly hit-and-miss, mainly because Tony suffered from a permanent case of Foot-In-Mouth syndrome and would tend to wax lyrical with Loki on all kinds of subjects, some of which would send Loki into a spiral of depression and self doubt as he struggled to even comprehend what Tony was talking about. Tony would, on those occasions, panic and call the nearest Avenger to help him with the man who would have more that likely gone foetal, as he himself would retreat to his lab and hunch over his work bench, blinking back stinging tears and wondering whether he could do anything right. But sometimes (more often than not), he would manage to engage Loki in a discussion about particle physics, and Loki would look at him with an expression that left Tony's chest feeling tight. When they were in the lab, and Loki was playing catch with Dummy, and Tony would be adjusting his suits or building new ones, Tony would talk about his time in Afghanistan, and his terror at being tortured. Loki would, at those points, put the ball down and drop his head on the back of Tony's. He would nuzzle and Tony would close his eyes and drop his hands to the ones that had encircled his waist. And Tony would feel as safe as he could, knowing that there was someone out there who had been tortured to the extent that Tony had, and that he was surrounded by people who would defend him from his nightmares till the end. Phil Coulson had found Loki to be pleasant company when it came to visiting the Tower, as Loki was very close to Steve, and would lap up any stories about Steve and Bucky, or which Phil had loads. Phil found himself doing paperwork on Thor's floor alongside Loki with his latest writing assignment, and would expound upon the good Captain and the Sergeant missing in action. Loki would listen, and occasionally reach out to touch Coulson's chest where he had been stabbed. Coulson would explain about dying, and how he much preferred living, and, because he knew the despair that sometimes would lie behind Loki's eyes, he would gently encourage Loki to keep living and not take the easy way out, because if he did, it would hurt Thor more than Coulson could say. And Loki could never bear to hurt Thor. Nick Fury had met Loki in hospital when he had first arrived, assessed his threat level and more or less determined him about as likely to hurt the Avengers as a fruit. His interactions with Loki were minimal but always uncomfortable, because as Loki got more and more used to people, he would look more and more at their faces (never in the eye. He wasn't brave enough for that), and Nick had never enjoyed being scrutinised by someone he couldn't look in the eye. So he gave team briefings with his eye looking everywhere but as Loki, and when he read the reports about Loki and his recovery, he did so with both a grudging sense of respect and worry. It was worth keeping an eye on Loki, simply because Fury had never been one to assume something based on initial appearances, and he could sense the power thrumming through Loki's veins. Safety first, and all that.     ************     And Loki continued to thrive. His writing improved, his reading got to the stage when one day, Bruce walked in to find Loki reading Anna Karenina in the original Russian, and one day found Tony, Loki and Thor writing equations for a slush hydrogen propelled car on the wall.  Loki still had nightmares, and more often than not, 3am found Thor sitting on his bed with Loki clasped in his arms, shaking from the force of his dream. On the really bad nights, Loki would paw at the crotch of Thor's trousers, stuck in his past where his only existence had been to service people. When that happened, Thor would pick Loki up in his arms and take him to the television, switching it on to something innocuous and letting Loki drift back to reality on his own. Loki soon found a place in the Tower as a sounding board and friend, and there was a feeling in his chest, as if his hear could one day reach out and flutter off. He tenthly described it as happiness.     ***********     A few months after Loki and Thor had arrived, Steve left the Tower so that he could be close to the Triskillion in DC. For days afterwards, Loki slipped into a depression, and Thor tried to coax Steve back, to no avail. "I'm getting more and more missions, Thor." Steve said to him over the phone. "It's easier for me if I stay here." "Loki misses you intensely." Thor said, running a hair through his (now quite long) hair and looking at the figure wrapped in Thor's cloak, starring blankly at the screen of the television. Steve sighed. "I know, and as soon as these missions peter out, I'm coming back. Stick Loki on the phone, I'll talk to him." Thor handed Loki the phone, who put it to his ear. His expression suddenly brightened when he heard Steve speak, and by the end of the conversation, he was now actively watching the movie.  "Thank you." Thor said. He was greatly relieved by the change in Loki's demeanour. "No problem. I'm coming back, don't worry."  When Thor finished the call, he wandered over to the sofa and pulled Loki into his arms, who snuggled in and wrapped his own arms around Thor's waist. Thor absently kissed Loki on the head and switched on the news. It was a few weeks later, when he sat with wide eyes and his heart in his throat as he watch three Helicarriers destroy themselves, that Thor realised that he should have gone with Steve, if only because he now recognised the destructive quality in Steve's eyes. Loki was sitting on the floor, wrapped snugly n the cloak as he too was entranced by the screen. As soon as the footage finished, Thor's phone rang and he scrambled to pick it up. "Yes?" he barked with worry. There was silence at the end, then a voice Thor didn't recognise said "Is that Thor?" "This is he. Who is speaking?" "My name is Sam Wilson. I have you listed as Thor's emergency contact." Thor nodded. "Yes, that is correct. Is there something wrong?" Sam sighed. "I guess you saw what happened." "S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters have been destroyed by H.Y.D.R.A." "That's not all." "And the Helicarriers have been blown up." "Yeah." There was a silence as Thor got more and more impatient. But before he could ask any more questions, Sam spoke. "Steve was on one of the Helicarriers when it blew." Thor felt as if the rug had been pulled out from underneath his feet. He wandered back to the sofa and sat down heavily. "What?" he said faintly. "Thor, Steve was caught in the explosions and then fell into the river." Thor licked suddenly dry lips and said softly "Is he dead?" At that, Loki's head swung around and he gripped Thor's leg hard, looking pleadingly at his chin. "No, no, he isn't dead. But he's not good either." "Where are you?" Thor said, standing up and moving to his room to pack a bag. Loki sat up on the sofa and looked back at the TV. "DC. You going to come?" "I have to, as his emergency contact." Thor haphazardly threw clothes and toiletries into his bag and zipped it close. He carried the bag into the living room and plonked it on the sofa beside Loki, who look at it and then Thor with an increasingly concerned expression. "I can be there in a few hours, which hospital is he in?" Thor asked. Sam gave him the name and gratefully Thor thanked him. He then put the phone down and turned to Loki. "I have to go to Steve. He's hurt and he may need a friend." Thor explained. Luckily, Loki seemed to understand because he grasped Thor's hand and squeezed it before releasing it and standing up. Thor took his bag in one hand and Loki's hand in the other, and together they took the elevator to the communal living area, where Bruce was already waiting. Thor explained to both Bruce and Loki that he was going to DC, and that Loki would be staying with Bruce for a few days. Before he left in one of Tony's rental cars, he kissed Loki on the forehead and promised to be back soon. The ride to DC was torturous, as Thor was worried both about Steve and Loki. Arriving at the hospital, he was shown to Steve's room where a man was already sitting, reading a magazine. He stood up when Thor entered and held out his hand.  "Sam Wilson." "Thor. It is a pleasure to meet you." Thor said, shaking it and giving Sam a warm smile. His expression dropped when he looked at Steve on the bed. Sam looked as well and grimaced. "What is the damage?" Thor asked in a low voice. "Internal bleeding, broken bones, fractured cheekbone. Infections from dirty river water. It's bad, man. Not gonna kill him, but he's out of commission for a few days." Thor nodded gravely. He pulled up a chair and sat down beside Steve. Sam resumed his seat and continued to read.  They sat in silence for an hour before Sam put down his magazine and asked "So why are you his emergency contact?" Thor shook himself from his stupor and smiled slightly at Sam. "Are you aware of the nature of the serum that was injected into the Captain to make him like he is?" "Kind of." Sam shrugged. "He said it was derived from the Tesseract, that glowing blue cub from outta space." "Yes. Well, there have been some tests done, and our body chemistry is somewhat similar, due to his new biology being alien in nature, and myself being an alien from the culture that constructed the Tesseract. It was determined that, should anything happen to Steve that modern medicine could not understand, then they could look at my own biology and determine the best course of action, and vice versa. It's a very good method." Sam sat there, absorbing the information. He then shook his shoulders and chuckled under his breath. "Man, that's fucked up." "Isn't it?" Thor grinned at him. Silence reigned again, but this time it was comfortable. The nurses eventually came in to take some readings and offer Sam and Thor cots to sleep in. They agreed that it was probably best if someone stayed with Steve at all times, and so played Rock-Paper-Scissors to determine who would have the first shift. Thor lost, and spent the first 6 hours reading quietly beside Steve, waiting for him to wake up. Sam was right, it was a few days later before Steve woke up. Thor had been getting coffee and came in to the room to find Steve sitting shakily up in bed. He smiled in joy and gave Sam his coffee. Two days later, Steve was discharged, and after a quiet conference between Thor, Sam, Steve and Natasha, it was quickly determined that Steve and Sam would move in to the Tower in New York briefly, before moving off to go and find Bucky. Coming back to the Tower was interesting, because Sam had had to pack up his entire flat in a day, and Tony had sent a moving van to help. They travelled back to the Tower and Sam whistled when he saw it. Tony was standing at the entrance, holding a champagne bottle with a set of keys attached to the neck with a ribbon. "Welcome, my flying friend!" Tony greeted. Sam looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Er, hi?" "Welcome to the Avengers. This is my Tower, now your home." Tony walked up to him and shoved the bottle into his hand. "You apartment is on the 41st floor." Steve looked at Sam in amusement as he concealed a twitch. "Come in, come in." Tony turned and walked back to the Tower, with Thor following close behind and Sam and Steve hefting boxes into their arms as they waled to the elevator to go to their respective floors. Thor was set to head straight to the communal living floor, where he knew Loki would be. The doors opened and Thor walked to the sofa, where Loki was curled up in the cloak, staring at the book that he was holding. Thor dropped his bag and leaned over the edge of the sofa, smiling softly. "Hello Loki." Loki dropped the book and whirled around, dropping the cloak and throwing his arms around Thor. He pulled himself up the Thor, so that they were chest to chest. Loki rubbed his cheek against Thor's scruff and sighed gently against his ear. Thor in turn wrapped his arms around Loki and hugged him tightly. "I'm back, I'm back." Thor said. He stood up and dragged Loki over the sofa with him, so that Loki was soon standing on his feet. Thor swayed from side to side. Bruce came out of the kitchen and smiled at the picture that greeted him. Thor met his eyes over Loki's head. "Hello Bruce. How has he been?" "Doing well." Bruce came over and cleaned up Loki's work materials. "It was difficult, when you first went, but once we explained it to him, it got easier. I think he's just been worried about Steve, and with you gone, it made it worse." Thor nodded and released Loki, who in turn released Thor and slipped his hand into Thor's, staying close by his side. Thor wandered into the kitchen and set about making himself and Loki some cereal, knowing that it was time for Loki to have a snack and feeling peckish as well. Loki settled in his seat and didn't take his eyes off Thor, his normally blank face softened. Loki never smiled, but the expression currently on his face the closest thing to it. Thor put the food in front of Loki and was just about to tuck in when the elevator door chimed open and Sam and Steve stepped out onto the floor, chatting away. Loki abandoned his food and hurried across to Steve, taking hold of his face between pale hands and turning it as if he was checking for injuries. "Loki, I'm okay." Steve said gently but allowed Loki to move his head. Sam was standing there, looking confused, but he had been made aware of Loki during his time with Steve, and to be honest he had been looking forward to meeting him. Loki was a born survivor, and Sam had wanted to meet someone who had gone through what he had gone through and come out the other end a bit broken but still whole. "Good Loki. I'm okay, you can stop checking." Steve gently brought Loki's hands away from his face and held them, rubbing his thumbs over the knuckles. Loki then noticed Sam for the first time and shrank back behind Steve, looking at Sam under lowered eyes. "This is my good friend, Sam Wilson." Steve said, releasing one of Loki's hands and putting it onto Sam's shoulder. Sam didn't move towards Loki, but instead stood where he was and smiled. "It's nice to meet you. Steve's told me a lot about you." He didn't offer his hand, but allowed Loki to get his fill of Sam. Loki spent the rest of the evening eyeing Sam, which he found somewhat disconcerting until Natasha took him gently aside and explained quietly about Loki's somewhat closeted life so far, and how he never really met any new people. After that, Sam took it upon himself to be with Loki as often as feasibly possible, in between sorting his new apartment out and planning a man finding road trip with Steve. Thor was glad to be back at the Tower, but found that Loki seemed to be a bit preoccupied. They had explained, in detail, what had happened in DC, and that Bucky was alive. Since then, Loki had been hoarding any sketchbooks that Steve had that contained pictures of Bucky, which was most of them. Loki seemed suddenly obsessed by Bucky and would often bee seen sitting on the floor of the communal area, sketchbooks open all around him at pictures of Bucky. And it was only Bucky. Bucky as a kid, Bucky in the army, Bucky in the Howling Commandos. Steve confessed to Thor that he had thought that Bucky and Loki would have really gotten on, but now he was getting slightly worried about Loki's current obsession. Thor confessed the same thing. But they couldn't do anything, because Loki taking an interest in something was always a good thing, and so they watched and waited for something to happen. It was getting closer to departure date for Sam and Steve, when Thor came crashing in to the communal living area one morning and stuttered out that Loki had gone missing during the night. Steve had sat Thor down with tea and got him to explain that he had woken up in the morning to find Loki gone from their bed, along with a backpack, his wallet, and three sketchbooks. When Steve looked over the sketchbooks, he knew that the books missing contained both the most pictures of Bucky, and also the most pictures of both Bucky and Steve together. Quickly the rest of the Tower was brought up to speed, and they went out, scouring the streets for the missing Loki. Thor and Steve went off together, Sam went off on his own, Tony drove and kept an eye out on the more public highways, whilst Natasha and Clint went to the subways, riding on every train they could. By the end of the day, it was cold and their feet were aching, and Loki was still missing. Thor sat on the sofa of the communal living area, a cold cup of coffee in his hands as he stared blankly at the wall. Natasha was patting his shoulder slightly in comfort. "I'm sure he won't have gone far." She said. "It's the first time he's been out of the Tower." Thor said horsely. "He's going to be so lost." "First light tomorrow, we'll go out and look again." Clint said, coming in to the room with plates piled high with sandwiches. Thor put his cup down and buried his head in his hands. His hair spilled over his fingers and they tangled with the strands, forming a barrier to the outside world. The rest of the team came in and sat down, eating and watching the news that was softly on. Nobody felt like talking. Loki ended up missing for three days. During each day, Thor would walk around the city, Mjolnir sitting on his wrist as a bracelet and his throat horse from calling. Fury had roped in some of his former agents to help, all armed with a current description of Loki and all scouring he streets for him. The rest of the Avengers helped when they could, but with the collapse of S.H.I.E.L.D, Natasha was in a much danger as Loki and needed to disappear occasionally, building new covers for both herself and Clint, who often accompanied her. Tony had his duties to Stark Industries and just couldn't spare the time. So it was really Sam, Steve and Bruce who helped. But it was a tense time for all of them, as they feared the worse. Thor would go to bed at night and spend the entire time staring at the ceiling, knowing that Loki was out there and that there was nothing he could do to find him until the morning. Loki hadn't even been wearing any shoes when he left. It broke Thor's heart to imagine Loki wandering around, scared and confused with bare feet. Thor was sitting in the communal kitchen, bleary eyed on the fourth day of Loki's disappearance when the elevator pinged open and Loki walked out. Thor dropped his mug in surprise. "Loki." He whispered and surged to hug Loki, when a man Loki had been holding hands with stormed in front of Loki with a knife out, pointing it at Thor. Thor stopped in surprise. "Who is this?" Thor asked. Loki tugged at the mans hand and threaded their fingers again. The man sheathed his knife and stepped back into Loki. They were standing very close, arms touching. Thor peered at the man, looking for features beneath the dirty carpet of hair and the thread-bare hoodie. He gasped when he recognised the eyes. "James Barnes?" He gasped. The man flinched and leaned even closer to Loki. Thor heard footsteps behind him and swung around, knowing who it was and trying to get to him before something happened. But was too late, and Steve dropped the glass in his hands as he too stared. "Bucky?" Steve whispered, staring at Bucky with tortured eyes. Loki looked as Bucky flinched again, and tugged him to the sofa, sitting Bucky down and opening his backpack. He took out the sketchbooks and opened them to the drawings of Bucky and Steve, before the war, before the serum. Bucky reached out a hand and gently traced the drawings, the same as Loki had done when he had first seen them. Steve made a strangled noise behind Thor. Bucky stopped tracing the pictures and his eyes settled on Loki, who had crossed over and wound his arms around Thor's waist, leaning in and settling his head against Thor's shoulder. Bucky bit his lip and his eyes flickered to Steve, who seemed frozen to the spot. Loki watched him, and, when he saw Bucky look at Steve with a naked expression of longing, he nodded and nudged his head towards Steve. Bucky gently rose from the sofa and walked to Steve, who couldn't move. He reached him, and cupped Steve's strong face in his hands. Steve closed him eyes and leaned into Bucky's metal hand, tears starting to course from his eyes. "I know you." Bucky whispered. Steve nodded. "You know me." "You said, one the Helicarrier." Bucky swallowed and tried again. "You said, you're with me till the end of the line." "I always am." "End of the line?" Steve opened his eyes and nodded. He reached out and cupped Bucky's face. "End of the line." He drew Bucky in and hugged him tightly, sobbing harshly into the dirt hair. But Bucky held Steve just as close, and sniffed at the familiar scent, and knew that he might be finally safe. Thor picked up Loki's bag and walked to the elevator, holding Loki close. He knew Loki was exhausted, and that by all rights he should be angry with him for disappearing. But he heard Steve and Bucky behind him, and in his heart, he knew that Loki had done the best thing imaginable, in his own unique way. That night, Bucky slept safely in the medical unit, his hand in Steve's. And Loki slept safely in Thor's arms, who looked at the ceiling and smiled in joy.     *************     Bucky described what had happened in those three days: On the first day, Loki had found his staking out the rooftops opposite the Tower, and had brought him food and spent the night sitting with him, watching him eat with green eyes that glowed like a cats.  The morning of the second day, Loki had taken his hand and brought him down to the street. They had eaten at a cafe and Loki had brought out the sketchbooks for the first time, showing Bucky pictures of Steve pre-serum. Bucky had nearly smashed the table, but Loki had been relentless. They had spent the day wandering around parks, sitting down and periodically looking through the sketchbooks. The pictures had fascinated Bucky, who had still been the Soldier but who had recognised Steve as something other than the Missions. That night, Loki had bought a room, and slept on the bed whilst Bucky had taken the floor, surrounded by pictures of someone he once knew. Day three had been introducing Bucky to himself. He had awoken that morning to find himself staring at a picture of Bucky before the war, smoking a cigarette and grinning unrepentant at the artist. Bucky had nearly thrown the book across the room, but Loki, coming out of the bathroom, had shaken his head and opened the rest of the books. They had holed themselves in the room, staring at pictures of Bucky in his youth, before the Ice had touched his eyes and hardened his heart. Pictures of Steve, his small face smiling softly at man only he could see. Some pictures of the two of them, lying side by side on a rickety bed, bare torsos pressed together as they slept a secret sleep. Two boys, dreaming of impossible things in a world that seemed determined to kill them both, just for being Bucky-and-Steve. Bucky had gasped as he remembered the feeling of sparrow-like hips under his hand, resting his head in a chest heading with exertion, and feeling the swell of protectiveness that came with knowing that only he could do this to Steve. He had looked at Loki and spoken of the most impossible things, things that he remembered were illegal but that might (might) be possible now. And Loki had looked at him and nodded. They had spent the night curled up together, holding hands, and then, the next day, they had got into a taxi and left for the Tower. And Bucky had never looked back.     **************     Loki spent more and more time on the communal living area, reading books and practising his writing. He was getting better at being left alone, although he always seems to enjoy someone being there. Bucky often came to join him, and Steve as well, as he found he enjoyed painting with an appreciative, if silent audience, and he was loathe to leave Bucky alone. And Bucky liked being with Loki, and Loki seemed to enjoy Bucky's company, and Steve liked them both. So it worked out rather well. Thor found himself with more and more time on his hands, and, when he wasn't in the gym, he now found himself talking to a rather wonderfully smart woman called Jane Forster (who had flirted with him for 10 minutes before Loki had come in, seen what was happening, and plastered himself across Thor's back, glaring at Jane). She seemed to be working on a project similar to the Bifrost from Asgard, and often asked questions from Thor about how it worked. She was hoping to start an interplanetary communication system, and Thor found himself encouraging her, as he too felt that the Realms were far to isolated from each other.  However, when she proposed starting with Asgard, Thor felt himself go slightly cold. "No, no, I don't think that would be a good idea." He said.  Jane looked at him, confused. "Why not? I mean, you're from Asgard, you know it best, you would be the perfect ambassador."  "Has no one explained the situation to you?" Thor asked, looking confused. On the other side of the lab, Tony winced as he tinkered with his suits. He had forgotten about Jane not really being in the loop. Jane shook her head, and Thor told her about is self-imposed exile, and the fact that he had vowed never to return to the Realm Eternal. He could see Jane visibly deflating. "Wait, I have an idea." Thor exclaimed suddenly. "There is another realm to which you might be able to exchange a dialogue." Jane looked cautiously interested. "What?" "Jötunnheim." "Isn't that where Loki's from?" Tony called. He abandoned his project and came over, finding the discussion to be more interesting. Thor nodded. He had forgotten about Jötunnheim, but now he remembered his lessons. And he remembered that, just before he had left, Helblindi had been elected King as Laufey had retired. Thor hoped that they remembered him from so long ago, as he hoped that establishing a peaceful coexistence between the two realms would help boost Jötunnheim's resources and save the dying planet. So he spent more and more time with Jane, who brought with her an energetic assistant in Darcy and a drinking companion in Dr Erik Selvig. Loki meanwhile started making lunch and brining it to Thor, who delighted in eating whatever Loki had cooked up, and frequently Loki ended up staying as he observed the machines slowly being constructed. His grasp of physics and mathematics was so good that he was soon bent over pages with Selvig, making alterations in his slow handwriting and letting Selvig exclaim in delight. Bucky would spend his days, when he was not in therapy, reading everything he could in Russian, and Loki would join him, snuggling up against his shoulder and reading from the same page. If it had been a bad day, Steve would lean against the other shoulder and Thor would pull Loki into his lap, so that they turned into what Tony called 'The Super Soldier and Godly Pretzel'. Nobody really minded when they came across this, as they used it as an excuse to order a restaurants worth of pizza and educate that group on the sofa in the ways of modern movies. Thor had been delighted with Star Wars, which had caused a lively argument with Bucky and Steve, who preferred Star Trek.  Loki would sit quietly and eat pizza, sometimes a whole box if no one was looking.      *************     Months passed this way, and yes, sometimes they would leave the Tower to fight the next megalomaniac who wanted to take over the world. Bucky was now cleared to join them, and everyone was secretly relieved that he would fight alongside them, because with his new metal arm (Patent to Stark Industries), he was practically unstoppable. They would come back, sometimes after days away, to find Loki had ordered out, or cooked a feast for them, and they would sit down as the worlds most mis- matched family and enjoy each others company. Life was good.     ************     Until it suddenly wasn't. It was Bruce who went missing first. Sometimes he would disappear, because he volunteered at the cities free clinics and would sometimes disappear for days at a time. He felt that, after destroying Harlem and the rest of New York during the Battle, he needed to balance out his bad deeds with some good ones. So he would go off, and come back a few days later, collapsed on the sofa while someone watched TV. But this time, he didn't come back. Loki noticed first, and handed a note one day to Tony, who then asked J.A.R.V.I.S where Bruce was. When J.A.R.V.I.S reported back that Bruce had been missing for a week, Tony visibly looked worried. A city wide search revealed that Bruce had not been seen for at least two days, and now the Avengers started to wonder if there was someone else planning something. But before they could launch an intelligence operation, both Clint and Natasha were snatched from their beds and also taken. Bucky visibly tensed when he saw that mess that their room had been in, the upturned tables and the darts stuck in the walls. Clint's bow was snapped in two, lying beside the door, and Bucky picked it up carefully, knowing that it had been broken beyond repair. If Clint was without his bow, and Natasha was without her knives, then suddenly Bucky knew that the Avengers were in real trouble. The rest of the Avengers spent the rest of the week together, forgoing their separate apartments to sleep on the floor of the communal living area. This did not stop Tony from disappearing one morning, two weeks later, when he went down into the lab to try and track the others down. Pepper, upon hearing Tony yelling, had raced down to the lab and taken a wrench to the back of the head, which had knocked her out and allowed her to be bundled into the loading van alongside Tony, who was panting harshly in panic at the sack over his head. Thor was getting increasingly worried, not only because of his team mates disappearing, but also because he knew it was only a matter of time before someone tried to get him two. Reaching Fury was no good, as he had also been snatched quickly after Natasha and Clint, and Coulson was desperately trying to keep the remains of S.H.I.E.L.D together. Maria had been taken in the same attack as Pepper and Tony. Thor now spent nights in the communal living area curled around Loki, who had now been reduced to staring blankly at the wall in panic. Loki was now cognitive enough that he realised the danger that he was in, and had become comatose with panic as a result. "Nothing will happen to me." Thor whispered against Loki's temple. "I promise you, I will keep safe." Loki would clutch as his arms in response. Bucky and Steve would lie on the floor and watch the windows and doors in turns, and Sam Wilson would make coffee, until the day they woke up to find the window of the kitchen open and coffee spilled all over the floor. Sam had been taken. Bucky became increasingly paranoid, not leaving Steve at all now. He knotted his hand in the back of Steve's shirt, and would even stay in the bathroom with him. But it could not stop Steve from being abducted, when he went to the door to get their pizza's and received a dart to the neck which knocked him out. Bucky whined high in his throat when he saw the pizza lying haphazardly on the floor, and rushed in to the street, where a well placed EMP struck his arm and he fell, jerking to the floor.  Thor was now alone in the Tower. The Avengers had been taken. Loki wrapped himself and Thor in Thor's cloak and slept as close as they could together. Thor could not look for his comrades, as he would not abandon Loki.  But one day, Loki came back from the kitchen, and found Mjolnir sitting on the floor, and Thor gone. The cups of coffee slipped from his fingers, and Loki turned wide eyes to the blasted out window. Thor was gone. Thor woke up slowly, groaning and shaking is head to try and disperse the headache. He blew gently to try and get the hair out of his face when he heard "Sleeping Beauty awakens." "Tony?" he groaned and opened his eyes to look around the room.  "Yeah, buddy. It's me."  Thor leaned his head back and looked around the room. All of his comrades were there, chained to the wall with a strong, shiny grey metal unlike anything Thor had every seen. Tony was strung up by his hands, his face bruised and one of his teeth chipped. Pepper lay slumped against him, unconscious. Clint, Natasha and Bucky were all strapped to the wall by their hands and ankles, Natasha and Clint quietly conversing, Bucky's breath hitching in fear as Steve, who was also chained by his hands and ankles, tried desperately to comfort him. Bruce was the only one who was chained by the neck, and he seemed to be meditating. Thor could see that the collar was tight on his neck, and that if he Hulked out, it would strangle and kill him. Fury was slumped in his chains, power napping whilst Maria was tugging fruitlessly at the restraints and Sam was also eyeing Bucky with worry in his eyes. All of their bared the signs of having been recently beaten up, rather viciously. "Where are we?" Thor asked, leaning back against the wall. Tony shrugged. "I don't know. Nobody seems to know." Thor frowned and jerked his head towards Bruce, who had opened his eyes. "Not even Bruce." "No." Natasha said. "Some men come in occasionally to take blood, or bring us to a room for tests, but they all seem to be on the same floor." "None of you have seen the outside." Thor concluded, and felt his heart sink. Clint shook his head. "I don't even know if we're still in America." Thor gently knocked his head back in frustration, but before he could say anything else, the door opened and three men in white lab coats came in. Following them were what appeared to be several guards in black combat gear. One of the scientists looked around, and then grinned when he saw Thor was awake. "Good, you have awoken. Take him." The guards went to the and unlocked his chains, brining his hands together and using powerful magnets to keep the wrists of the manacles attached. "Also, bring that one." He pointed to Bucky, who started shaking his head and whining, high in his throat. Steve started bellowing in protest, which prompted the others to also voice their protests, loudly.  The guards dragged Thor and Bucky away, to a room resembling a horrific mix of Tony's labs and a hospital suite. Thor and Bucky were bolted to tables and one of the scientists started attaching electrodes and monitoring pads to Thor and Bucky's chests. Bucky started heaving and turned his head to vomit. "Disgusting. You'd think they would show a bit of backbone." One of the scientists complained, roughly wiping Bucky's face. "Never mind." Said on others the other. He pressed a button and a machine came down from the ceiling, attaching itself over Thor's and Bucky's faces and around their heads. Bucky starts to hyperventilate in panic, whilst Thor looked confused. "One. Two. Three. Go." One of the scientists pressed a button and almost immediately, Bucky started screaming and thrashing in his restraints. Thor meanwhile felt a pleasant tingling around his temples and frowned. The scientists switched the machines off and Bucky stopped screaming. He panted harshly instead and Thor tried with all his might to break the restraints. "Subject 10 still exhibits normal reactions when confronted by electricity, whilst Subject 11 appears not to be affected." One of the scientists said whilst noting it down on a chart. Another scientist came a slapped Thor across the face. "Why are you not affected?" he asked. Thor spat in his face. The scientist whipped off the spittle slowly and the slapped him again. "Answer me, or I'll get the other one from your Tower and use him instead." "No, not Loki!" Bucky screamed and thrashed. Thor licked his lips and answered. "I am the God of Thunder and Lightning. Electricity doesn't affect me because I have it running through my veins." "But you can still feel it."  Thor nodded. "Interesting." The scientist murmured and went over to his colleagues. He murmured with them for a few minutes and then went back to the machine. He turned a dial and then said "Increasing the dosage by 10." "Stop, you'll kill him!" Thor said, heaving in his restraints. "No, we won't. You cannot kill someone like that." And with that, the scientist pressed the button and Bucky screamed again. The torture went on for an hour, before Bucky stopped screaming and only twitched. Thor had long stopped crying, and instead only looked blankly at the ceiling, as the gentle pulsing washed through him. He now understood what the Avengers were there for. They were anomalies of nature, and as such, were treated like that. Thor lost count of the time he spent in the prison with the others. Every day, one or two of the Avengers would be taken out, and then brought back in a worse state. One night, Pepper was not returned, and when the morning came, she was strung up alongside Tony, weeping and saying "They cut off my arm. They cut off my arm and made me re-grow it." Tony soothed her by pressing his lips to her hair, salty tears tracking down his face. Thor was pitted against the Hulk in an underground arena, and watch as the Hulk refused to fight, and was beaten savagely for it. The Hulk would not fight anyone, as he recognised friends. Bruce spent more time unconscious than anyone else.  Bucky's mind recovered quickly, and he was often taken out with Steve, as the scientists loved to compare their own different biology and the difference in the serums they were given. Occasionally, Thor would be with them, and all of them would refuse to speak a word when it came to questions, confounding the scientists and making sure that each was punished by the end of the day. Food was a luxury that they got to 'enjoy' once a day, and water came only twice. Soon, each of them supported dry lips and hollow cheeks. Dying seemed almost certain. One day, when all of them had been given a respite from the testing, a man came in to the cell. He was tall, with slicked back black hair and wide black eyes. He was dressed sharply in a suit, and his long fingers ended in clawed nails. He eyed them all with amusement, but in particular, focused on Fury, who in turn glared at him. "Do you know who I am?" He asked softly. He had a faint southern accent. Fury didn't speak. "You do, don't you. You remember exactly who I am." "The rest of us don't." Croaked Clint. The man turned to Clint and stalked forward, leaning in until his nose nearly brushed Clint's. Clint back away, screwing up his eyes. "Clint Barton." The man drawled. "Wazzup?"  "Don't play games with me, Hawkeye." The man abruptly stoop up and slapped Clint in the face. Natasha snarled and jerked in her manacles. "Buck up, Black Widow." The man said, still looking at Clint. "It's not the first time he's been slapped and it certainly won't be the...oh." The man chuckled suddenly. "It actually will be." "What are you talking about, nut job?" Tony asked. "My name is not nut job." The man turned to Tony and raised a perfectly manicured eyebrow. "My name is Louis Robespierre." There was a beat of silence, before Bucky said, slightly incredulously "As in Maximilian Robespierre? The great decapatator of France?" "My ancestor." The man turned his slightly unnerving gaze on to Bucky. "I think he had the right idea." "By chopping off the heads of anyone who opposed the Government?" Steve said, sharing a glance with Bucky. "By exterminating anyone who was different, who would not conform to what the people wanted." Robespierre hissed. "Oh shit." Tony said, completely deadpan. "It's shitty Hitler mark 2." "I'm better than Hitler." "Really?" Bruce said, guffawing. "Because we've heard this speech before, and no one who said it is doing pretty good these days." "The fundamental difference between them and me," said Robespierre, now not looking at anyone and picking off invisible lint from his suit arm, "is that I have both the wits and the means to carry out my plan, and I have managed to remove all of you in the process." The Avengers suddenly felt hollow as they realised exactly what situation they were in. "It was amazing, how I managed to catch you all silently. That Stark sound suppressor really does the trick." Robespierre looked at Tony, who suddenly looked sick and stared at the floor in rage and shame. "Are you aware," asked Robespierre, "of how long you have been here?" Nobody answered. "Two months. That's two months of research, two months of studying the lot of you. Two months in which to act, and with nobody to stop me." "What?" Tony gasped. "Yes. Two months, and you have managed to do nothing. You cannot even get out." "It's not like we've been sitting on our asses." Sam said angrily, rattling the chains. Robespierre smiles oilily at him. "I did take precautions when it came to getting the lot of you. Your god cannot even break the chains. Tell the others, Mr Stark, what they are made out of." Tony looked at the ground and said, through his teeth "Adamantium." Natasha gaped at him, and Bruce said "But I thought-" "That the entire reserve of adamantium was inside that beast Wolverine's body?" Robespierre chuckled. "Not all of it. Department H have been very good to me." "You do realise you have fallen in to the classic failure of bad guys?" Sam taunted. However, Robespierre's expression did not change, and Sam suddenly realised that there was more to the situation than he knew. "You think I would risk unveiling my plan if there was even the slightest chance that you would be able to topple it?" Robespierre grinned at all of them. "Two months. I have taken DC, and now New York. You can do nothing to stop me. With new knowledge of your abilities, my armies are stronger than ever. Soon, America will fall, and with it, the rest of the world will soon follow. And I can stand here and tell you all of this, because, with those unbreakable manacles and with the magic suppressors that Stephen Strange was able to give me before he so tragically died, you can do nothing to stop me." The cell was silent. The Avengers had nothing to say. "Well now, I believe that it's off to New York with you all." Robespierre went to the door. "I need to send a strong message to the people of that city that opposition will not be tolerated, and executing the Avengers in front of them would be the perfect way to do so." "NO!" Screamed Tony and Steve, wrenching forward in their manacles, hands grasping at air. Pepper hung loosely in shock, and every one else was seeking the eyes of the others. Robespierre left, and soon guards came in. They were injected with the sedative, and soon were bundled in to vans on the way to New York.  Thor awoke to screaming and groggily lifted his head. He saw lines of people being held back by guards with guns, and felt the rough wood underneath his knees. His hand were tied behind his back, and as he turned his head, he saw the other Avengers in the same position. New York was in an uproar, but they could not get past the guards and on to the podium, where the Avengers were kneeling. Thor was sickened to see a basket on one edge of the podium, and a man with a large sword standing next to where Robespierre was sitting. "They awaken!" Robespierre cried, standing up and walking to the Avengers. They crowded together, a last show of solidarity, but Robespierre walked behind them and grasped Steve by the hair, hauling his head up. "People of New York, this is a warning!" Robespierre cried. Thor realised that he had a mike attached to his lapel, and the screaming died down, until the city was almost silent. Robespierre dropped Steve, who put his head on Bucky's shoulder and gasped. "This is what happens, when opposition is seen!" Robespierre featured to the Avengers, who started brokenly at the people they tried to protect. Thor could hear crying and his heart jumped in his chest. "There will be no tolerance. Anybody seen opposing the new regime will meet the same punishment as your so called Avengers!" Robespierre turned back to the guards and gestured to Thor. "Start with him." Thor was grabbed roughly by the arms and dragged to where the basket was. He knelt above it. He breathed deeply, trying to calm his racing heart. He could hear Pepper sobbing his name softly, and Steve started to sing, a song Thor had taught him about the brave going to Valhalla. Bucky soon joined him. He could hear Tony say "Go in peace, big guy."  He closed his eyes, and thought of Loki.  He heard the executioner stand beside him, and heard the sword swing through the air. He tensed his shoulders, and prayed it would be quick. His skin suddenly prickled, and goosebumps rose as cold air was blasted from above him. Thor turned his head, and saw the sword suddenly crack, before it was covered in ice and splintered like rotten wood. The shards of broken steel fell to the floor, and Thor released a breath he didn't know he was holding. "What the hell?" Robespierre said. The executioner shook his head. "That's never happened before." Robespierre sighed harshly and took his gun from his pocket. He handed it barrel first to the other man. "Use this. Shoot them in the back of the-" "No." The sound stopped. The wind calmed, the trees didn't rustle. Thor turned his head to the other side, slowly, not daring to believe who it was.  But it was. It was. It was Loki. It was Loki, in Jötunn form. It was Loki, and he wasglorious. He stood beside Robespierre, wearing nothing but a pair of tight jeans and Thor's cape this time as a cloak, fastened around his neck with an emerald studded brooch. Mjolnir swung from his belt loops. His blue skin danced in the sunlight, and his scars stood out on stark white relief, painting a beautiful picture on his body. His hands now had black, elongated claws at the end, and his waist length hair danced in it's loose plait, danced in a wind of Loki's own making. Atop his head sat the most beautiful set of horns, arching high and proud, and not unlike a helm Thor had once seen in his fathers weapons vault. They were dark brown, and slightly ridged with little nicks, and Thor's breath stopped in his chest as he gaze not the magnificence that was Loki. Loki's blood red eyes met Thor's for the first time in nearly a year, and Thor could have wept at the strength now in them.  This was Loki as he should always have been, proud and beautiful. Thor could not have loved him any more than he did now. "What?" gasped Robespierre stumbling back.  "No." Loki said again, walking towards him. His voice was slightly thick, but as beautiful as silk and as commanding as a thunder storm. "Get away from me!" Robespierre said, stumbling back. He suddenly turned to the executioner. "Shoot them!" The executioner jumped and pointed the gun at the back of Thor's head, who gasped, having forgotten the man was there. But his eyes were on Loki, who turned suddenly with a snarl and race to the man. Thor saw him swing out his left arm and the executioners own head tumbled to the ground. Thor saw that Loki's arm was now encased in the sharpest ice, and blood trickled down the blade.  Loki looked at Robespierre and licked the blade, licking the blood from it with the slow smirk. Robespierre quickly jumped from the podium as the crowd descended into mayhem.  Loki disintegrated the blade and stepped behind Thor. His hands encased Thor's wrists and Thor cried out at the sensation of burning cold, before he felt the manacles crack and fall to the ground. Thor stood up, rubbing his wrists and looking at Loki. "Loki." He whispered. The man turned and looked at Thor with narrowed eyes. Thor didn't bother to resist. He grabbed Loki by the shoulders and pulled him into a sweet kiss. Loki froze for a brief second and then tentatively kissed back, one ice blue hand cupping Thor's face. Thor could have happily kissed Loki forever, but they were interrupted by Tony saying loudly "Not that we're not all pleased, but could Frosty come and help us as well?" Thor broker away with a relieved laugh and let Loki hurry to the others, who gazed at him with wide eyes. Each of them winced when Loki disintegrated their manacles, but soon all were standing and looking at the crowds, who had started fighting the guards. "I need J.A.R.V.I.S." Tony muttered. Loki quickly put a hand into his pocket and brought out a small ear piece which he handed to Tony. Tony put it into his ear and suddenly his face relaxed into a smile. "J.A.R.V.I.S, we need weapons." He paused for a minute and then assured the others "Weapons are on their way." "My bow was broken." Clint said. Tony paused and then raised his eyebrows at Loki, who looked back with a blank face. "Loki had repaired it." Clint grinned at Loki. "Niiiiiice." Loki turned back to Thor and released Mjolnir from his belt, offering it to Thor with a grin. Thor took it and felt relieved that he could feel the familiar weight in his palm, and the power thrumming through his veins. Behind him, one of Tony's suits appeared with all of the teams weapons either in it's arms of strapped to it. Steve hefted his shield with a relieved expression whilst Natasha, Bucky, Fury and Maria all grabbed their selected guns, ammunition and knives, stopping them to various parts of their bodies. Sam relieved the suit of his new Stark built wings and quickly got into them, strapping on his goggles and powering it for flight. Clint suppressed a squeal of joy when he saw his new custom bow and the full quiver of arrows. Tony then got into the suit and Thor could see Bruce standing on the pavement, waiting for the perfect opportunity to Hulk out. Pepper started glowing red. "Avengers, assemble." Steve said and everyone got off the podium, Bruce roaring with joy as the Hulk was unleashed. Tony quickly handed out ear pieces and soon everyone was with communications. "What do we need to do?" Bucky asked, shifting from foot to foot as he prepared to dive into the crowd. "Soldiers all over the city." Steve said, looking around. "They'll be some for crowd control and others patrolling the streets. Clint, Bucky, you two are up top. Get as many of them as possible, I want you from rooftop to rooftop." Bucky and Clint nodded and Tony took them to the nearest rooftop, where they started shooting almost immediately. "Thor, I want you up in the air. Use you lighting in to take out vehicles, weapons, men. Anything that could be a threat." Thor nodded, swung his hammer and left. "Fury, Maria, Pepper. On the ground, corralling people. Get them into the buildings, keep them safe. This going to get messy." Fury, Maria and Pepper immediately headed in to the crowd, getting people to follow them into the nearest large and convenient buildings. "Hulk, smash their weapons. Don't get hit by Thor's lightning." The Hulk grinned and went off, scattering people everywhere. "Tony, Sam, I want a city wide culling. Fire at will."  "On it, Cap." Tony said and took off, using precision shots to take out soldiers. Sam followed, whooping with joy as he hit them. "I'll be joining Fury and Maria with crowd control. Natasha, Loki, you two go after Robespierre. Bring him back to the Tower for trial, jury, and execution." Natasha frowned. "Execution?" she asked. Behind her, Loki encased his arm in ice again. Steve nodded, looking grim. "This man just tried to kill an Avenger in front of the world. He surrendered his humanity as soon as he took DC." Natasha looked at Steve, then gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before turning and following Loki. Steve went to where he had last seen Maria and hurried in to the crowd. On the top, Thor jumped fro building to building, following the roads and shooting down vehicles. He hissed when his arm was nicked by a bullet and he cleared down at the vehicle, about to send lightning its way before it was summarily destroyed by the Hulk. "Good work!" Thor called and the Hulk grinned up at him. Beside him, Sam landed to give his arms a break. There was a scorch mark on his left wing.  "What happened?" Thor asked, starting to swing his hammer. "Some of the bastards light up like Pepper. We need explosions." "Did someone say explosions?" said Tony, who was sweeping through Brooklyn.  "Yeah, some of the guards are like Pepper."  "Sending rockets on your way." "Ewwwww." They heard Clint say through the comms. Thor frowned from where he was flying and almost turned back. "That was disgusting." Bucky muttered. "What's the problem? MARIA, DUCK!" Steve said, and there was the distinctive sound of his shield pinging off of someone and returning. "They really didn't master the Hulk transformation." Bucky said. He shuffled from where he was standing and jumped roofs, getting soldiers right int he temples mid jump. "Some guys just tried to change, and tuned themselves inside out." Clint said. His arrows sailed through the air. "That's gross." Natasha said. They could hear gunfire in the background and her soft panting. "Luckily it seems that they didn't manage to get Tony's arc reactor power from TO THE LEFT! TO THE LEFT! TO THE LEFT!" They heard Pepper screech, then there was the unmistakable sound of fire roaring and then a crisping sound. "That's my woman!" Tony said proudly. "I got super soldiers on my six! I need air cover." Fury said and Thor heard Bucky and Steve both start swearing profusely. "Coming your way." Sam said and swung towards where Fury was. His guns fired bullets and the beefed up men dropped. "They don't seem to be getting up." Sam said, swinging back to join Tony. "Formula seems to be faulty." Steve said. "I've got cannon here!" Thor suddenly said. He tried to get out of the way, but didn't manage to turn in time when a shell hurtled in his direction. He was saved when an ice blast suddenly encased the shell and it hurtled down to the ground. It hit the ground and exploded, but the explosions was contained in the ice, so all that was left was a puddle in the middle of the street. "My thanks, Loki." Thor said, hurtling down the street after a truck that was racing away. "Loki's grinning. I think he says no problem." Natasha assured him. "Aww, that's FUCKER! SHOOT AT ME AGAIN, I DARE YOU!" Clint said, suddenly furious that his moment had been interrupted.  "These guys don't know when to quit, do they?" Maria asked, shooting several men who were holding children hostage. "We need to get them to stop." Tony said, sailing over head and dropping men like flies. "Natasha, Loki, you need to find Robespierre. We might be able to get him to stop his men." Steve panted. "We're on it, but it's not like he left a trail." Natasha said, sounding frustrated. She stopped suddenly when Loki lifted his head and sniffed the air and then hurried off down a side street. Natasha followed him. Half an hour later, the Avengers were exhausted, as they had been running on empty to start with and had wasted away during the two months they had spent in captivity. However, their battle ended when a tremulous voice echoed throughout the city. "This is Louis Robespierre. I order any men under my affiliation to stop now and surrender to the authorities. Do it immediately." The soldiers looked confused and dropped their weapons. This police that were standing nearby picked them up and bearded the men into contained spaces they could be locked in, whilst the citizens did the same if their were no police nearby. There was a bit of firing which continued, but that was from citizens who relished having heavy trigger fingers.  The Avengers tripped back to the Tower, Bucky holding up Clint who was slumped over his own bow. When they got to the Tower, Loki was sitting at the bar eating ice cubes, his eyes looking over everyone before fixing themselves on Thor. He stood up and hurried to Thor, nuzzling under his chin and lipping at the skin. "Thor." He said. Thor's eyes flooded with exhausted tears and he dropped Mjolnir, wrapping his arms around Loki and pressing his head gently against Loki's horns.  (Steve wandered over and, without a thought, picked up Mjolnir and set her on the table before collapsing on the sofa.) Robespierre was huddled beside an armchair, one arm missing. He was shivering and shaking, and had wet his trousers in fear when Loki had come bearing down on him, looking like the vengeful god that he really was.  "You." Tony slurred slightly and slid further down his seat. Pepper was sitting passed out against his shoulder, and Bruce was lying on his lap, staring blankly at the wall. "What shall we do with you?" "Shall we play a game?" Natasha said and Steve snorted with weak laughter. He relieved Clint and passed him over to Natasha who sat with him on the floor, before taking Bucky by the hand and curling up together on the sofa. Sam sat on the arm and rested a hand on Steve's shoulder, in an effort to stay upright. Fury and Hill were sitting at the breakfast bar. Fury was on the phone to Coulson, who was shrieking with joy at having them all back and quickly bringing Fury up to date with S.H.I.E.L.D.S status (small and slightly diminished, but ready to mobilise at Fury's word.) "You deserve to die." Thor said, drawing Loki gently down to the floor and pulling him against his chest as Thor leaned back against Steve's leg. "Please, please don't kill me." Robespierre sobbed. He had lost everything in two short hours, he had nothing left. Even his dignity had gone. "But you deserve to." "Didn't you say execution?" Natasha asked Steve quietly over Clint's sleeping head. Steve smiled ruefully. "Heat of the moment. I will not lower myself to his standard by killing him." "Then what shall we do with him?" There was silence, before Fury said "Put him in the Hulk cage." "Huh?" Bucky asked. "That glass box designed for the Hulk. Put him in there. He can stew till morning." There was a tired game of Rock-Paper-Scissors before Tony reluctantly stood up, grabbed Robespierre by the hair and dragged him to the basement. The Avengers didn't move except to get the pizza that they ordered, and occasionally visit the bathroom. It was in the middle of the night, when the news was the only thing lighting the room, when Steve nudged Thor and said softly "We'd all be dead if it wasn't for Loki." Thor smiled gently at the sleeping man in his arms. "Loki saved the day." Bucky muttered without opening his eyes "Loki saved the world." Thor nodded and closed his eyes, slipping back into slumber. He whispered to the room, to the city, to the stars. "Loki saved the world."     Epilogue   If this was a fairy tale, Loki 's first word would have been "Thor" and he would suddenly be verbose. He would speak his mind all of the time, with snark and sarcasm, and play as many pranks on the Avengers as he could and every night, he and Thor would make passionate love. The Avengers would defeat all of the bad guys, and there would never be any battles ever again. But life is not a fairy tale. Loki would very rarely speak, and certainly never said anything more that two syllables. He could says the Avengers names, and some simple commands, but, having spent his entire life mute, he found speaking to be taxing, and so communicated with his beautiful hand writing. None of the others minded, and on missions Loki would communicate through his comms with morse code. Thor and Loki would never make love, ever. But they exchanged enough kisses that this was enough for them. They didn't need more. Taking back DC proved to be even more taxing that New York, and when Robespierre's new government blew up the Lincoln memorial, Steve nearly exploded in rage. Clint was shot through his lungs and died twice on the operating table. Natasha went catatonic when she heard this, and spent the months of Clint's convalescene by his bedside, never leaving it except when necessary. Nine months later, they would be married in a simple ceremony officiated by Fury, and would spend their honeymoon shooting H.Y.D.R.A operatives in Poland.  They said that it was very relaxing. Steve and Bucky married as well, and spent their honeymoon painting in the Lake District in England, on the few days it wasn't raining. The bridge that Jane had been building was soon online, and the Avengers stood nervously at their end, waiting to see who would come through. When Helblindi came through, surrounded by his entourage, Thor let out a relieved breath. But Helblindi's eyes were fixed on Loki, who also stood frozen. "You look," Helblindi gulped and started again. "You look like my mother." Loki nodded and steppe forward (Thor had explained his theories to Loki). He extended a hand and traced the matching scars on Helblindi's face. Helblindi's eyes filled with tears and he reached out a hand to stroke Loki's long hair. "You look like my mama." Helblindi sobbed. Behind him, Byliestr held a hand to his mouth, and raced back through the portal, coming back and dragging his father by the elbow. When Laufey saw Loki, he collapsed to his knees and pulled Loki to his chest, howling to the skyies in relief. His son was back, and he was alive. Thor would spend his nights awake, sometimes listening to the chatter of Jötunns laughing with Tony, sometimes hearing the dust creep through the Tower. But most times he would look at his chest, and see Loki lying there, his pale face turned to Thor's. Thor would sometimes wonder, what would have happened if, for example, Odin had kept Loki and raised him to be a brother to Thor. How differently life would have turned out then. Or perhaps, if Odin's 'mercy' hadn't extended that far and he left Loki to die on the ice. But then Loki would snuffle Thor's chest, and Thor's eyes would squeeze shut. And he would forget those thoughts, and be thankful. For it had been a long and torturous road, but they were here now. And Thor would go to sleep, and trust the stars to keep them safe. End Notes The image I dreamt was the one Steve sees in the warm pool room, where Thor is gently cuddling a shell-shocked Loki, who is staring at the water. It was so powerful to me that I literally woke up sobbing. I based Tyr's personality on someone I knew growing up. I was (and probably still am) an army brat, and the man I knew was my own father's supers officer. He, too, was arrogant and self centred, though not as cruel as Tyr was. Robespierre was someone I needed for plot devices. Please don't be too harsh on me about him. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!