Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/13443453.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Major_Character_Death, Rape/Non-Con,
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Supernatural
  Relationship:
      Gabriel/Sam_Winchester, Castiel/Dean_Winchester, Jessica_Moore/Sam
      Winchester, Adam_Milligan/Samandriel, Benny_Lafitte_&_Dean_Winchester,
      Gabriel_&_Original_Female_Character
  Character:
      Gabriel_(Supernatural), Gabriel's_Dog_(Supernatural), Sam_Winchester,
      Samandriel_(Supernatural), Dean_Winchester, Jessica_Moore, Lucifer_
      (Supernatural), Castiel_(Supernatural), John_Winchester, Michael_
      (Supernatural), Adam_Milligan
  Additional Tags:
      lucifer_is_a_bad_guy, very_gory_during_flashbacks, John_Winchester's_A+
      Parenting, lots_of_rape_during_flashbacks, i_don't_know_how_to_tag, very
      dark, for_like_the_first_five_chapters, i'm_aware_gabriel_is_ooc_for_a
      bit
  Stats:
      Published: 2018-01-21 Updated: 2018-03-18 Chapters: 2/? Words: 7973
****** Living In The Past ******
by lokixarchangel
Summary
     Gabriel was kidnapped at a young age for a sex trafficking ring and
     turned into a "performer". He has had to watch the only people he
     knew be sold or die. Finally, at the age of 23, he was rescued and he
     now has to readjust to human life. How do you do that when everyone
     had accepted your death? And the boy you had a crush on is now
     engaged? How do you readjust to life, when life has been turned
     upside down? Gabriel doubts he'll ever find out.
Notes
     TW: Very dark flashbacks that are in Italics if you need to skip
     through.
***** I won't be okay. *****
Gabriel stepped off the curb and crossed the street, hands stuffed in his
pocket. He was headed to his therapist appointment. He had dark circles under
his eyes this time from nightmares keeping him awake the night before.
“I’m Gabriel Shurley? I have an appointment with Ellen?” He said to the lady at
the front desk, though it was pointless. She already knew him, given he had
already been there several times.
“First door.” She smiled, gestured. He quietly thanked her before heading to
that door, knocking once before heading in, sitting down on the couch. He
fidgeted with the zipper on his jacket, biting his lip.
Soon, Ellen was there and she sat down, getting out her clipboard as usual and
smiling warmly. “Hello, Gabe. You been feeling better?”
He shrugged and looked up at her. “So, so. Nightmares are getting worse.”
“That’s understandable and to be expected. Contrary to popular belief,
something like this takes time to get over.” She smiled, sympathetically,
before writing something down. “So, where did we leave off, last time… Ah, yes,
you were telling me about… Hell?”
Gabriel frowned. This was her form of therapy. He told her everything that he’d
been through. He had to admit, it actually helped. Kept him from staying
permanently shut in his own mind. Especially since he had no one to tell. “Oh,
yeah. Hell was… it was an experience. You got sent down to hell for a variety
of reasons. It wasn’t even really a place. It was more an extreme punishment. I
was only sent down once…”
 
“Up. Up!” A guard ordered Gabriel, yanking him up.
The omega woke up, very confused, before crying out in pain as the guard
squeezed his arm tightly. “I said, up!” Gabriel immediately got up before he
was hurt more, wrapping his arms around himself as a chain was attached to the
collar around his neck.
“Where are we going?” He mumbled before getting backhanded across the face.
“Did I tell you that you could speak?!” The guard growled as Gabriel held his
face, whimpering. He shook his head, looking down. He didn’t dare say he was
sorry before being yanked out of his cell. He silently followed the guard to a
room, biting his lip after a moment.
Once in the room, his eyes widened as he looked around. The room was bathed in
red light and had about fifty people sitting at tables, eating. They had masks
covering their eyes and were all chatting. Their voices were drowned out by
Gabriel’s own fear as his chain was attached to the wall by a chair.
“Sit.” He was shoved into the chair and tied to it. He didn’t struggle, already
knowing it was useless. He just took deep breaths and settled in for whatever
torture he was going to be subjected to.
After a moment, the chatter died down when a man entered the room, grinning.
Gabriel didn’t hear what he was saying, his own heartbeat drowning out noise.
His heart was pounding. He couldn’t see straight. He closed his eyes to fix his
vision before deciding to keep them closed.
That didn’t last long, however, as soon, the man yanked his hair. “Open your
eyes, you little bitch. Come on, let everyone see those eyes. Everyone can
smell the fear rolling off you.”
Gabriel tried not to recoil in fear and disgust, blinking open his eyes. “S-
sir--” He was cut off by another backhand.  
“Nobody told you to speak, whore.” He growled, putting a gag in Gabriel’s
mouth. Gabriel’s eyes widened at the insult and pain and he cried out again
when his hair was yanked, again. “Now. Keep your eyes open. Got it?”
Gabriel nodded, quickly, making sure his eyes stayed open as the man walked
away, coming back with a hot fire poker. Gabriel’s eyes somehow widened again
when he saw the bright red end and he started to panic again. ‘No, no, no, no-’
His thoughts were cut off by a searing pain and he screamed, vision blacking
out.
When he came to reality again, he heard laughing and more chatter before
screaming again as the hot poker was pressed to his skin, again. He struggled
to get away from the heat, from the pain, but he was trapped. He tried to kick,
but his legs couldn’t move. And when he tried to move his head, the spikes
around his neck in his collar dug in. He was already dripping blood down his
chest.
The man went to press the poker to his skin again before stopping as he heard
Gabriel’s name being called. Gabriel felt his shoulder being shook. “Gabriel.”
“Gabriel!”
 
“Gabriel!” Ellen managed to drag him out of the memory, finally. “You okay?”
Gabriel blinked a moment before nodded, “yeah- yeah. I’m fine. Sorry. Zoned
out.”
“You did it again, didn’t you?” She frowned as Gabriel sheepishly nodded. “Why
don’t you tell me about it, next week. Let’s end this session, early? Okay? You
look exhausted.”
Gabriel nodded a bit and quietly thanked her before getting up and leaving. He
yawned a bit as he said goodbye to the lady at the front desk. For a moment, he
almost forgot to wait for the sign, but remembered at the last minute.
Ellen’s first task had been to get Gabriel readjusted to “human life.” As if
going through what he did made him no longer human. Don’t get him wrong, he
knew she had good intentions, just, sometimes, she worded said intentions
wrong. Sometimes. He ran a hand down his face, continuing to walk.
As he walked, he realized, he didn’t want to be alone at the moment.
Unfortunately, not being alone, would mean interaction. And possibly having to
answer questions that he didn’t want to answer. For the first five months, he
was plagued by the media, constantly asking questions. He had refused to leave
his house for a good month, having his friend Sam bring his groceries.
Sam didn’t ask questions. Gabriel was grateful for that. Maybe Sam wouldn’t
mind hanging out? Unless he was with that bitch of a fiance, Ruby. His heart
ached at the thought of Ruby.
Ruby was a Beta. Sam was an Alpha. Some Alphas preferred Betas to Omegas, due
to several factors. Gabriel had never asked Sam about this, not quite wanting
to know the answer. He had had a crush on Sam when they were close in high
school. They had been best friends before he had been taken. When he had been
rescued, he had found out Sam was engaged. He had to admit, he blocked Sam out
a lot because of this. But, Sam had treated him differently, too. So, he never
felt guilty.
Gabriel took a breath before getting out his phone and dialing Sam’s number,
putting the phone to his ear. He was at his apartment building, so he started
climbing the stairs until he got to his floor. His apartment was near the
stairs; a safety measure. He was still terrified of being taken again, so he
made sure to limit that risk. He jumped from surprise, dropping his keys, when
Sam answered. “Hello?” He hummed, clearly smiling.
“Sam! Hey! Um… I just got back from my-”
“Ruby stop. Come on, we gotta get ready.” Sam chuckled. “Sorry, Gabe. What were
you saying?”
Gabriel felt his mood dampen more and his shoulders slumped. But, he faked a
smile for his tone, unlocking his door and heading in. “Nothing. Sorry. Just
wanted to check up on you. You sound good, though. So, I’m gonna go. Sorry for
bothering you. Have a nice afternoon. Bye.” He quickly hung up, putting his
keys in the bowl and kicking the door shut.
Snickers, his little jack russell terrier, came running over to greet him. He
gave a weak smile to the hyper dog, crouching down to pick him up. “Hey buddy.
Miss me?” He murmured, petting him. The dog had been a therapy pet, but he was
probably one of Gabriel’s only friends. A sad thought. But true.
He had picked the dog because they had similar backgrounds. Snickers had been
stolen from his home as well and illegally trafficked in dog fighting rings. He
felt the little dog might understand him a bit. He kissed the dog’s head.
“Could you eat? I could eat. Let’s get some food.”
He set the dog down, getting out the dog food. He realised he’d have to go
grocery shopping. For both of them it seemed, as he looked for his own food,
only having several cup of noodles. “Noodles it is.” he mumbled, sighing, and
getting down one of the cups.
 Snickers barked and Gabriel realised he had forgotten to fill his bowl with
food. His phone rang and he turned it off without checking who it was, before
scooping food into Michief’s bowl. He put the bag back before petting Snickers
again and heating up the noodles, yawning a bit. “How about a movie and maybe a
nap?” He asked the dog, heading to the living room. He sat down with his
noodles, grabbing the remote. Several movies were off the list of options, so
he just picked a disney movie, curling up and eating.
He fell asleep halfway through the movie, the empty noodle cup discarded on the
floor. He was curled up on his side, having pulled a blanket over himself.
 
When Gabriel hung up the phone, Sam had been confused. He seemed so abrupt.
And, vaguely, he feared he might have accidentally set Gabriel back a bit.
“Shit.” He muttered. He went to try and call him back before being stopped by
Ruby’s hand on his arm.
She smiled. “We have a reservation, remember?”
“Yeah. Sorry. I have to call him back, though. It might be bad for his mental
health if I don’t.”
“Why? He can wait a couple of hours, can’t he?” Ruby sighed, rolling her eyes
and taking her hand back. “I guess we’ll be late, then.” She went and plopped
on the couch, crossing her arms and sitting back.
Sam ignored his fiance and called Gabriel, even more concerned when he didn’t
answer. He sighed and just sent a text before gesturing for Ruby to come with
him to the car. Ruby grinned and followed him. “I told you he could wait.”
He opened her door for her, helping her in. He hesitated when he went to open
his own door. “That’s the problem,” he muttered, “I don’t think he can.” He
sighed and finally got in the car, starting it before driving.
 
“Hey. Kid. Come to the bars.” A voice whispered to Gabriel. He jumped from
surprise but went to the bars, blindly feeling around.
“Um… Hello?” He mumbled, rubbing his eyes. If they were open. It was pitch
black down there and he couldn’t see anything. Occasionally, a surge of power
would happen and the lights would temporarily flash. That was how he knew he
had bars. He rubbed at the area where the spikes in his collar had dug into his
neck, wincing.
“Hey. Are you hungry?” He heard kindness and a smile in the voice. It sounded
femine and was soft.
“Kinda… They haven’t let me had any food…” He rubbed his stomach. A power surge
happened and for a brief second, he could see who was talking to him. A girl
who was definitely older than him and had long black hair was sitting near the
bars. He jumped back from how close she was.
“Put your hands through the two largest gaps at the bottom. Let me know when
you do that.” She quietly told him. He quickly nodded and felt around before
putting his hands through. He couldn’t help but feel scared that this was a
trick.
“I did it.” He was very quiet and ready to yank his hands back at the first
sign of pain. A few things were pressed into his hands. He blinked at the cool
feel of tin foil and a more rough feel of something else.
“Okay, keep a good grip on these and pull your hands back.” She whispered.
Gabriel quickly pulled his hands back and bit his lip. “Chocolate and an
orange. I’ll try to bring you a bottle of water, later. Hey, are you afraid of
fire?”
“No… Why?”
“Here. Put a hand back out.”
He had to feel around a bit, but managed to put his hand back out, feeling
plastic pressed into it. He took his hand back, feeling around the small object
and realizing it was a lighter. “Thank you… What’s your name? If I’m allowed to
ask?”
“Hanna. What’s yours?” She had a very sweet voice. Like sugar. It was high
pitched, but not annoyingly so. Not nasally.
“G-Gabriel… At least, I think so. Everything is so fuzzy.” He mumbled.
“That’s the drugs. Don’t worry. You’ll gain everything back in a few more
weeks.” He could hear another smile. He jumped when he heard loud yelling.
“Quickly put them under your pillow! Don’t let them see what I gave you!”
Gabriel’s eyes widened and he quickly did as told, stuffing the items under the
pillow. He heard the yelling get closer before he saw lights and several men
stop outside his cell. One of them, he recognized as the man who pressed a hot
poker to his skin. He immediately hid under his bed.
“Hanna, why are you out of bed?” The man sighed.
“Sorry, father. I just had heard that you had gotten a new one and I was hoping
to see him. I wanted to see if he was as pathetic as you said he was.” She
sounded like she was pouting.
“You need to ask, first. Come on, off to bed.” The lights went off and he heard
footsteps fade. When they did, he crawled back out and got out the small orange
from under his pillow. He struggling to open it for a moment before using a
broken piece of rock from the wall. He almost cried when he swallowed the first
piece, before finishing the rest pretty fast. He tore off a piece of his
blanket and put the chocolate in it, hiding it under the bed. He then laid
down, falling asleep with a smile.
 
“Alrighty… Chicken or beef…” Gabriel mumbled, looking at the two types of
ramen. “I could have something that tastes nothing like chicken and something
that tastes nothing like beef. How about I get both?” He sighed and put both
boxes in the cart.
He then moved on the fresh produce. Ramen was cheap, so it was always first on
his list. He got some vegetables, in case he ever felt like actually cooking.
Or had to pretend he was alright for his family. Then it was tv dinners and
lots and lots of pastas. Pasta was also cheap and there was fifty thousand ways
to make it. So, it got pretty high up on the list, too.
“Snickers needs more dog food.” He reminded himself, heading to the pet aisle
before shaking his head. “I’ll take him to Petsmart. He can actually go in and
we’ll look at the fish and kittens together.” He hummed.
Yeah, he talked to himself a lot. It was a coping mechanism to help with the
loneliness. And, it distracted him from thinking too hard. “Shit. Have to go to
dinner at my family’s house. Can’t back out this time. God, Naomi’s gonna be
there.” He muttered, shaking his head. He rolled his eyes and got another
canned sauce and some mushrooms. He then went up to pay, getting out his money.
He worked for 11 dollars an hour and, since he literally did not go out and do
anything other than spend a ton on candy and alcohol, he had a good amount of
money. He handed the cashier the cash when he finished ringing everything up.
“It’s getting cold, isn’t it.” He smiled kindly at Gabriel. The interaction
surprised him. He looked to be barely nineteen and smelled like young alpha.
“Yeah. Heard it’s supposed to drop below freezing.” He attempted to interact
back, smiling politely.
“Well, uh… Bundle up!” He smiled brightly and waved as Gabriel took his bags
and left. He went to his car, that he rarely used except for these instances,
and put everything in the trunk. He wasn’t too much older than the alpha. He
was only 22. Funny how a story is going through the grieving process of someone
so young, huh?
Gabriel got in the car and started driving, checking his receipt and furrowing
his eyebrows at a neatly written phone number. How had he missed him writing
that?  Whatever. He crumbled the receipt and tossed it into the backseat.
“Sorry, kid. Not looking for anything like that.” He mumbled, focusing on the
road.
When he got to his apartment building, he carried all the bags upstairs,
frowning when the door was already unlocked. “Shit, I must have forgotten to
lock it…” He mumbled, heading in. He went straight to the kitchen and set the
bags on the counter before looking for Snickers. “Snickers! Buddy?” He called.
The small dog came running out of Gabriel’s bedroom, wagging his tail. “There
you are, buddy! Hi!” He smiled brightly at the dog and crouched down, petting
him. “Ready to go pick some food out for you?”
Snickers yipped and wagged his tail more. Gabriel grinned and picked him up,
getting the leash. He hesitated at the sight of the leash and shook his head,
putting it back. “I won’t do that to you.” He mumbled, starting to head out
again after quickly putting away refrigerated items. He set Snickers in the
passenger seat before getting in the driver’s seat.
It was a short drive to Petsmart and soon, Gabriel was getting out Snickers and
walking inside. He pet him as he carried him around, furrowing his brows at all
the bags. “Okay… How about you pick?” He murmured to the dog. “Chicken or
beef?”
Snickers yipped and Gabriel chuckled. “Both? Okay, then…” He got two medium
sized bags, putting them in the cart. He then also put Snickers in a cart. He
then also put Snickers in the cart, starting to look around the store. “I
honestly have nothing better to do, I guess.” He sighed, pushing the cart
through the aisles. He got Snickers a few sweaters and went to look at the
rescue kittens. Snickers was good around cats, due to not living with one.
“Let’s go home.” He smiled at Snickers, paying for everything. He loaded it
into the car and headed home. On the way, his phone rang, so he answered.
“Hello?”
“Hey! It’s Sam.”
“Oh, hey Sam.” He felt an easy smile take over his lips. “How are you?”
“I’m great! Me and Ruby are looking at wedding venues.”
Gabriel’s smile disappeared and he felt tired all over again. “Really? That
sounds… nice…” He mumbled, parking when he got to the building and putting his
head back. Snickers climbed into his lap and Gabriel petted him, closing his
eyes. “Sorry, did you need anything specific?”
“No…” He heard a frown in Sam’s voice, but ignored it. “I just wanted to check
on you. We haven’t spoken much, have we?”
“Well, not really. Sorry, I have to go. I have to get this food inside. I hope
you and Ruby have fun with your venues.”
“Wait, Gabe. Would you want to hang out this Saturday?”
“Oh… Sam, I’m sorry. I have plans, surprisingly.”
“Oh, that’s- what? Oh my god, that’s great! With who?”
“Family? Dad said I wasn’t allowed to back out this time.” He smiled weakly and
yawned a bit. “Sorry, I really have to go. Bye.”
“That’s good.” He smiled before frowning again. “Oh. Alright. Bye. Miss you.”
“Miss you, too.” He smiled a bit before hanging up and sighing. “People suck.
Come on. Another night of falling asleep on the couch watching Friends reruns.”
He got out and headed inside with the bags.
He put everything away and sighed, wondering if he should check in with his
brother. He just shrugged. “I’ll call him, tomorrow.” He sat down on the couch
and laid back on it, turning on the tv. He turned on a tv show and pulled a
blanket over himself, reaching to turn off the lamp.
***** I give up *****
Chapter Summary
     Gabriel struggles through the memories and a family dinner. Along
     with getting a suit for Sam's wedding.
Chapter Notes
     MAJOR TRIGGER WARNINGS. VERY GRAPHIC AND THERE IS RAPE IN THIS
     CHAPTER.
Gabriel hesitated before knocking on the door and taking a deep breath. He had
a small dish of pasta in his hands, bouncing nervously. He hadn’t sat down for
dinner with his father and all of his brothers in a long time. They’d always
been too busy, or Gabriel was in a hospital, or Chuck was on a trip.
He had obsessed over looking normal and “okay” for this dinner. He didn’t want
to worry anyone. He had brushed his hair out and washed it really good, but
didn’t bother with any product or styling. He was in a star wars tee shirt and
purple jeans, having impulsively bought them a couple months before and never
worn them. And, he only had one pair of shoes; a pair of ratty old converse.
When Chuck opened the door, Gabriel attempted a smile. Chuck immediately hugged
him. Gabriel had to resist the urge to cling to the familiar contact and sank
into it instead, leaning forward as his father pulled from the embrace. Chuck
smiled brighter and Gabriel knew he had expected him to push him away.
Gabriel lamely held up the dish, attempting a stronger smile. “You said to
bring something, so I brought pasta… Is Cas here?”
“Of course. He’s helping to cook the rest. And, pasta will fit perfectly in
with the rest of the meal.” Chuck patted Gabriel’s shoulder before gently
taking the dish and carrying it to the kitchen.
Gabriel relaxed, a bit relieved. He followed him in, smelling chicken. He
couldn’t remember the last time he’d had an actual meal. Not even after he got
back. He withdrew and rarely ate with other people. So, it’d been a while.
Cas immediately ran over to hug Gabriel, grinning. “You came. I’m glad.”
Gabriel hugged back, once again sinking into the embrace and closing his eyes.
He was trying not to seem touch-starved and was grateful when Cas made it last
a little longer than normal before pulling away.
Gabriel offered to help cook and Cas set him to work with peeling potatoes,
happily chatting with his brother. Gabriel realised how much he had missed this
and relaxed again as part of the neverending ache laxed up. He chatted back,
having a small easy smile after a couple moments.
Cas knew not to bring up certain things and Gabriel was grateful when he
avoided them. Soon, Chuck joined the conversation, helping Gabriel out and
showing tons of fatherly affection, which Gabriel was also grateful for.
After a while, their brothers slowly started to arrive, each carrying their own
dish. Their sisters even showed up, though they left their husbands at home.
Gabriel stayed in the kitchen, too sheepish to admit he was kind of hiding.
Even though they were only his brothers, fifteen was a huge number in that
small dining room.
Eventually, though, he sacked up and joined everyone at the table. A few
brothers happily greeted him, some ignored him, and others avoided his eyes.
Gabriel sat down between Chuck and Cas. He put food on his plate and
immediately started eating while the rest of his family chatted with each
other.
Gabriel stayed silent, mostly, and listened, tapping his foot. His mind strayed
to his dog for a moment before coming back to dinner. He looked down at his
plate and bit his lip, having already finished a first plate. He waited until
everyone was preoccupied, before getting a bit more, mostly out of habit. He
was used to having to sneak food, still. Especially with meals like this.
Gabriel saw Chuck frown out of the corner of his eye and withdrew back in on
himself, frowning as well. He just went back to eating before hearing his
father speak. “So, Gabe. How’s everything been?”
Gabriel just shrugged, furrowing his brows. He wasn’t sure how to answer that.
“Um… I got a job, a couple of months ago. It’s at the library, so it’s quiet.
It pays eleven an hour, but I want to pick up a second at the convenience store
so I can afford to get a second dog.” And, mostly to kill the endless free time
he had.
“That’s good! Very good! I’m glad for you.” Chuck patted Gabriel’s shoulder
before continuing to eat.
Lucifer snorted. “Why the library? I thought you loved loud spaces.”
Gabriel cringed. “Well… not anymore. Sensory overload.”
“Oh, right. Your “anxiety.”” Lucifer made finger quotes and snorted. Gabriel
cringed into himself and got silent again as Chuck glared.
Cas rolled his eyes. “Shut up, Lucifer. You know very well it’s not because of
that. It’s because of his adhd. Which, you have, too. So stick it.”
Gabriel frowned, not wanting them to start a fight because of him. “Cas, I’m
fine,” he whispered and looked down.
“Maybe so. But, he doesn’t have to be a jerk.” Cas sighed and whispered back
before continuing to eat. Gabriel shrugged a bit and continued to eat as well.
After a moment, Cas got up to grab the dessert, which Gabriel had been kind of
excited about. It was a massive chocolate cake with bright blue white cream
cheese icing. Gabriel smiled tiny bit, again, when Cas brought it out and set
it down. He got Gabriel a big piece, first, just to make sure he would get one,
before letting the rest dig in.
Gabriel melted when he took the first bite, closing his eyes. Homemade
chocolate cake. Not boxed. Not store bought. Home. Made. Gabriel was in heaven.
He had to be. He hadn’t had something this rich in a long time and he knew his
stomach was going to protest, later. But, for right now, he didn’t care.
Cas chuckled, softly. “You’re welcome. I made it with you in mind. I’m glad you
like it.” Gabriel smiled a bit more and mumbled a thank you as he continued
eating.
When everyone was done and had left, Gabriel helped Cas clear the table,
thanking him several times for different things. He also thanked Chuck as well.
And, when it was time for him to go home, they both hugged Gabriel tightly
before he left.
Gabriel drove home, having had the foresight to know he shouldn’t walk home at
night. He relaxed a bit as he drove.  Maybe things would be okay…  He thought,
as he drove. That thought brought another smile to his face and he turned on
the radio, plugging his phone into it.
When he got home, he dropped his keys in the bowl before double locking the
door and petting Snickers’ head, yawning a bit. “I had a good night,” he told
him as he filled his water. Snickers yipped and wagged his tail, following him
back to the bedroom.
Gabriel got quickly changed and laid down after turning on his fairy lights,
yawning again. Snickers jumped onto the bed and curled up by Gabriel. Gabriel
smiled sleepily and pet his back, slowly drifting off to sleep.
 
Gabriel’s head was yanked from the tub of water and Gabriel gasped for air,
only able to let water into his mouth, due to the contraption in his mouth that
kept him from closing it. The alpha torturing him smelled like old, stale
alcohol and vomit. Probably Gabriel’s vomit. Gabriel choked a bit as the
alpha’s cock was forced through the contraption into his mouth.
He had a firm grip on his hair and, even though Gabriel struggled to get away,
he kept his head still. The alpha smirked and growled, “you look so pretty
dripping wet and terrified. You just gotta learn not to say no, don’t you?”
Gabriel gagged again before letting out a painful breath of relief as the alpha
pulled his cock out. Gabriel hoped he was done, but immediately lost that hope
as his head was shoved back into the water. His vision was blurry this time as
his head came out and his eyes stung from the water that Gabriel was sure had
bleach or chlorine in it.
Gabriel struggled to see as he was thrown to the ground, too weak to move. He
just coughed and threw up in the floor, again. The alpha laughed and spread his
legs, shoving a finger inside Gabriel’s ass, making the omega tense up,
immediately.
He attempted to struggle away again, but just ended up coughing from the
exertion. His hair stuck to his forehead and Gabriel gave up, closing his eyes
as the finger was pulled out and the alpha’s cock was stuck inside. Gabriel
cried out, not used to it, and tensed up more, whimpering from the pain.
The alpha laughed, again, and slapped Gabriel’s thigh before pulling out and
grabbing Gabriel by the hair, shoving his head into the water, but deeper. He
then also slammed back inside of Gabriel, making Gabriel grab the sides of the
tub and struggle again, screaming into the water.
The alpha started to thrust in and out and Gabriel beat on the sides, gasping
as his head was pulled out for a moment before getting shoved right back in.
Gabriel sobbed while his head was in the tub of water, beating at the sides
again.
The alpha slapped his back, which was all torn up from a whipping the day
before, and it hurt so bad, Gabriel blacked out from everything combined.
When he came to, he was on the floor, vision still blurry from the water. He
attempted to look around, failing, and closed his eyes. He felt himself be
lifted and the contraption yanked out of his mouth before being dragged
somewhere. He whimpered, coughing again.
He got a new pair of panties slipped on him. He already knew what colour they
were; black. He was forcefully laid on his cot, on his back, and he cried out
before he was lifted up again and bandaged up.
The people in charge were smart. They knew if wounds were left unattended for
too long, the performers would die. Gabriel knew this as well. And, it made him
want to scream louder. Why couldn’t they just let him die?! He sobbed as he was
laid back down, on his side this time.
“Shut up.” He was backhanded and he made himself stop crying, curling into
himself. “Good boy…” Instead of being backhanded, his hair was stroked,
lightly, before he was left alone.
 
Gabriel woke up in a cold sweat, gasping for air and feeling like his head was
still submerged. It took him a moment to realise he was just in his apartment,
and had luckily not woken up his dog.
He got up and took a breath, going to the kitchen and sighing. He got himself
some ice water, closing his eyes as he leaned against the counter. He reminded
himself he was safe. He was okay. He wasn’t going to be hurt like that, soon.
After a while, he relaxed and went back to bed, laying down and looking at the
ceiling. So much for things being okay. He rolled onto his side, imagining a
deep sting in his back and closed his eyes. He slowly managed to fall asleep,
after an hour of nonstop thinking.
 
He woke up to Cas calling him. “Hey, just called to remind you that we’re going
tuxedo shopping in an hour with Sam and the rest of the groomsmen. I’ll pick
you up in forty five minutes. Ruby won’t be there.” Cas hung up and Gabriel
groaned.
He slowly got up and rubbed his eyes, trying to keep them open long enough to
get to the bathroom. He still was feeling the after effects of his nightmare,
trying to ignore the psychosomatic pain in his back.
Okay. Forty five minutes. He could take a quick shower in that time. But,
first, he has serious;y gotta brush his teeth. He fumbled around for the
toothbrush, brushing his teeth as he went downstairs and made coffee. He then
spit in the trash before going back to the bathroom and finishing, rinsing his
mouth before running a shower and stepping in.
He made sure not to look at himself as he slowly ran a soapy sponge over
himself, closing his eyes and leaning against the wall. He breathed slowly as
the water, burning hot, ran over his skin and turned it red, his mind
wandering.
“Kid. Kid!” He heard whispered from outside his cell. He slowly got up and went
to the bars, rubbing his eyes and sitting down. He already knew who it was. She
had already visited him a few times, before.
She turned on a flashlight so Gabriel could see, making him wince from the
sudden light. She smiled a bit. “Sorry. Thought you might want to see. Still
can’t talk?” Gabriel shook his head. He tried but ended up coughing and
wincing.
“Don’t try. Here.” She slipped a bag through the bars and into Gabriel’s hand.
Gabriel immediately opened it to find a couple of fruits and a few tea lights
with some big matches and another lighter. He did as he usually did to thank
her, which she had asked. He got close to a bigger opening in the door so she
could reach through and pet his hair.
She smiled and put her hand through, running a hand through his already dirty
hair. He’d be bathed, again, tomorrow. “I’m talking to my dad to see about
making you my pet. It’s a better life than you have here. And, he likes you.
So, he’ll most likely say yes.” She continued to pet his hair before handing
him a sandwich through the bars.
Gabriel frowned at the word pet, but got distracted by the sandwich and
immediately tore off the saran wrap, starting to eat. “Slow down.” She told him
and he immediately did so, nuzzling up into her hand.
She chuckled, softly, and murmured, “good boy…” She continued to stroke his
hair as he ate. As she did so, she put tiny braids in his hair, humming softly.
Gabriel relaxed deeply from the affection, closing his eyes and getting sleepy.
Hanna took them out and pulled him back so she could kiss his head before
telling him to go to bed. “I’ll get my father to give you a break, tomorrow.
Just a simple bathing and petting, so you look pretty for your first day.”
Gabriel nodded a bit and went to his cot, laying down and closing his eyes.
“Sleep well, pup…” She whispered as Gabriel drifted back off.
 
Gabriel put his head back and started to wash his hair, keeping his eyes
closed. He stepped out, after a moment, and sighed as he avoided the mirror. He
dried himself off before getting dressed right as Cas texted him that he was
there.
Gabriel stuck his phone in his pocket before filling Snickers’ food and water
bowl. He then quickly rushed out to Cas’s car, sighing. “Sorry. Was in the
shower.” Once again in a tee shirt and jeans, he got in the car, buckling.
“It’s okay. I brought breakfast.” He handed him the bag. Gabriel immediately
dug out his food and yawned a bit as he started eating, curling up in the seat.
“So, did you sleep well?”
“Yeah. Sort of.” Gabriel shrugged, mouth filled with food. Still living on the
whole “might not always get food, so eat when you can”, he naturally didn’t
have many dining manners.
Cas frowned. “What do you mean “sort of”?”
“Just had rocky sleep.” He shrugged, again, and continued eating. Cas sighed
and dropped the subject as he continued driving, parking too soon.
Gabriel forced himself out of the car, already panicking. Maybe he should get
back in the car and go back to his nice and cozy bed with no friend who’s
getting married.
Cas gently grabbed his arm and drug him inside, dropping him off at a tailor,
who immediately shoved Gabriel into a dressing room with a suit. Gabriel
immediately started to panic from the shove, taking deep breaths to calm
himself.
No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t calm his heart beat, so he just gave
up and started to change, keeping his eyes closed because of all of the
mirrors. When he was done, he stepped out, already afraid of the tailor.
The tailor harshly grabbed his arm, making Gabriel’s already pounding heart
beat faster. Gabriel obediently followed, soon getting dragged back into a
flashback.
 
He winced as his arm was grabbed tightly and he was dragged to a hook, getting
his bound arms yanked above his head and hung on the hooks, making him dangle.
He looked down when he saw the whip, making sure to relax so it hurt less.
He bit into his tongue to keep from crying out from the first whip. “Pathetic,
little shit. You just can’t keep your mouth shut.” He felt another whip strike
across his back and he made a little pained sound.
His torturer laughed. “Awww, are you in pain?” He grabbed Gabriel’s chin and
forced him to look at him. “God. You’re so fuckin ugly. I can’t believe we keep
you.” He snorted and backhanded Gabriel before whipping him again. This one
tore a stripe of skin out of his back. Gabriel couldn’t help but cry out as
another one hit.
His torturer continued to degrade him as he whipped him, smirking the whole
time. Gabriel was barely conscious by the time they took him down and carried
him to his cell, forcing him onto his back. He cried out in pain.
They lifted him up and wrapped him up, like routine, before laying him on his
side. He made no sound as they left, curling up and crying softly. He whimpered
and closed his eyes, singing softly to himself in a broken voice.
All alone… He was all alone… He hugged himself. The little omega was broken. He
had lasted through so many years of this. He was giving up. He had missed his
own birthday.
That realisation cut deep. According to a date he had casually heard, he was
eighteen. Eighteen years old. He’d been down there for four years. He stopped
crying and felt a different darkness start to consume him. Any sort of hope at
being rescued fled his mind and he slumped into the bed.
“Happy birthday to me…” He whispered, taking in a breath. “Happy birthday to
me. Happy birthday to Gabriel…” He choked a bit. “Happy birthday to… me…” His
voice died off and he shook his head, gripping at the sheet. “I give up.” He
whispered. “I give up.”
Gabriel was yanked out of the memory by Castiel pulling him into his arms and
hugging him tightly. “Shhhh… Sh… I got you… We got a new tailor… Sh…”
Gabriel realised he was sobbing and buried his face in Cas’s arm, hugging back
and gripping at the back of his shirt. “She grabbed me… and shoved me… she
scared me…” He choked out and sobbed harder.
“I know, Gabe. I know. Let’s sit down.” Cas gently brought him over to the
chair and sat with him, making his scent calming for Gabriel. All that did,
though, was make Gabriel grip tighter at his shirt, realizing how much he had
missed his brother.
Gabriel calmed after a moment, pulling away. He realised they were in the
bathroom and relaxed when he realised no one had seen him break down. “How… How
many saw?”
“Just me and Dean. He immediately grabbed you away from the tailor and brought
you over. He’s complaining to the manager right now. We got a new one. She’s
much sweeter and softer. She won’t grab you. We made sure she knew that you
were… sensitive and she couldn’t be rough.”
Gabriel nodded a bit and relax more.  “Cas… my birthday is in a month…”
“I know. I already cleared the day so we can hang out and eat ice cream and
cake. Dad says he can come over as well, if you need.” Cas combed his fingers
through Gabriel’s hair, being gentle.
Gabriel nodded a bit. “That sounds good… Really good…” He took a breath before
getting up to clear the damage off his face. Cas gave him a bottle of
foundation that he carried for Gabe, just in case. Gabriel smiled gratefully
and took it, making his face look better.
“I’ll go let Dean know you’re okay and come back to get you.” Cas smiled and
left for a moment before coming back. Gabriel stayed quiet as they went back to
the group.
The new tailor smiled kindly and helped him onto the stool before gently
starting to adjust the suit. She stayed quiet, which Gabriel was grateful for,
and he watched Sam talk to the other guys, not really hearing what he was
saying.
The tailor spoke up, after a moment. “Sucks, doesn’t it?”
“What do you mean?” He blushed and looked down at her.
“Being a groomsman in the man you’re in love with’s wedding.” She shrugged and
smiled up at him.
“I-I don’t know what you’re… you’re talking about…” He turned more red and
looked away. She chuckled and shrugged again, going back to what she was doing
and falling silent again.
Gabriel looked back at Sam, again, feeling sadness. He was talking about Ruby.
He could tell. He was all lit up and happy looking. He never looked like that
when talking about him.
When the tailor finished, she gently sent him back to the dressing room,
letting him get changed back. Gabriel stepped out and frowned when she was
gone, heading to sit down. He looked down, letting out a breath.
Gabriel watched the rest get theirs done, after a bit, feeling like an outcast,
again. He kinda just wanted to go home and sleep again, feeling exhausted. His
breakdown had really drained him.
He leaned back in the seat before looking outside and noticing a small donut
shop. His stomach growled and he hesitated before looking back at the group. No
one was paying attention. He could grab a donut, eat it, and be back before
anyone noticed.
He got up and left, going over to the donut place and buying one before heading
out and sitting on the curb to eat it. He sighed a bit, feeling stupid. This
was ridiculous. He’d had a mental breakdown, and was now outside eating a
donut. Well, it was a good donut. The icing was delicious. And, it was fluffy
and still warm.
He melted and closed his eyes, finishing the donut. He forced himself to go
back before he bought another, sitting back in the same chair and snorting when
he realised no one had noticed. He rolled his eyes and got out his phone,
playing on it for a bit and tapping his foot.
After a moment, Sam came over and sat down, smiling brightly. “Sorry I haven’t
said hi, yet.”
Gabriel jumped and looked up at Sam, immediately blushing. “It’s fine. You’ve
been busy.”
Sam shrugged and hummed. “Still. I should have said hi. How have you been? Was
the family dinner okay?”
“It was fine.” He sighed and looked down, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.
Why did Sam have to just be so perfect and concerned and always make sure
Gabriel was okay? Why couldn’t he just suck and make it easier on Gabriel? It’d
hurt a lot less if Sam was a jackass.
“Are you sure?” Sam gently brushed Gabriel’s hair out of his face, frowning
when Gabriel moved away from his hand.
“I’m sure. It was just… okay. Not much to report on.” Gabriel shrugged and
tried to ignore his fluttering heart. “You should probably get back to your
tailor.”
Sam frowned, noticing Gabriel shutting down. He just nodded and went back to
where he was supposed to be, glancing back at Gabriel.
Gabriel took a breath and, when nobody was looking, disappeared out the doors,
going home.
 
“Gabriel! I missed you!” Sam hugged Gabriel, tightly. “Where were you??”
“Sick. Got an insanely bad stomach flu.” Gabriel grinned and hugged back. “I’m
better, now. So, what are we playing?” He stuck a lollipop in his mouth before
giving one to Sam. “It better be something fun.”
“Hmm… Pirates!” Sam grinned, already running off to grab the fake swords and
costumes. He and Gabriel had spent weaks gathering all the stuff to make
costumes for several of their games. “Here!” He tossed Gabriel his costume
before tugging his on.
Gabriel tugged his on as well, before grabbing his sword and running to Sam’s
bed, making the pirate voice. “Argh, ye scallywag! What der ye be doin on mah
ship?!”
“I be lookin for yer treasure!” Sam grinned, holding out his own sword. Soon,
the boys had a sword fight that ended with them both on the floor and looking
up at the ceiling. Gabriel was still giggling, hands extended out.
He knew they were getting too old for these games. They were both going into
middle school, and soon it would be seen as uncool. But, Gabriel loved them. He
loved spending time with Sam, though Sam was acting different, lately.
The moment Sam had presented as an alpha, he had told Gabriel. Gabriel hadn’t
minded. He already knew he was an omega, having been getting heats since he was
nine. Gabriel had never minded being an omega, either. It was just an eh thing
for him.
But, ever since Sam had presented, he’d slowly started changing. He got a bit
more aggressive at times, and, he would often ditch Gabriel for other omegas.
Which, sucked major since Gabriel was starting to realize he had feelings for
Sam.
His dad had stopped letting Gabriel hang out with Sam on his heats, even though
he was taking suppressors. Gabriel had been saddened, but he didn’t worry about
it. He just told Sam the message, before suggesting they play Space Warriors.
Sam got a text message and sat up, grinning. “Dude, that hot omega just texted
me.”
Gabriel frowned, sitting up. “Oh? I thought you said he didn’t seem
interested.”
“I guess he is.” Sam shrugged, getting distracted by the cell phone.
Gabriel deflated and sighed, laying back down. He looked at the ceiling for a
while. Then, he got frustrated. “I should go.”
“Okay.” Sam replied, obviously not paying attention. Gabriel sighed and got up,
pulling off the pirate costume and grabbing his bag full of candy and pokemon
cards and ds games. He walked to the door before glancing back.
“Bye.” He mumbled.
“Mhm. Sounds good.” Sam replied. Gabriel just rolled his eyes and walked out,
texting his dad to come get him.
In moments, his father was there. He frowned at Gabriel’s expression, but
didn’t say anything, knowing Gabriel would tell him if he wanted to.
Gabriel leaned against the door and curled up in the seat, feeling hot tears
start to roll down his face. When he got home, he went inside without saying
anything. He went to his room and tossed the bag on the bed, wiping his eyes
and going to his computer. “Stupid.” He muttered, glaring at the screen.
 
“Stupid.” Gabriel mumbled as he plopped down on the couch, feeling tears drip
down his face. “I’m so stupid. He never loved me.” He muttered, covering his
eyes with his arms.
Sam never did. And, he never would. “I give up.” He whispered. “I give up.”
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