Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/5309582.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      F/M, M/M
  Fandom:
      Divergent_Series_-_Veronica_Roth, Divergent_(Movies)
  Relationship:
      Peter/Caleb_Prior, Peter_Hayes/Caleb_Prior, Four/Tris_Prior
  Character:
      Peter_Hayes_(Divergent), Caleb_Prior, Four_(Divergent), Tobias, Christina
      (Divergent), Tris_Prior
  Additional Tags:
      Sexual_Content, Explicit_Sexual_Content, Rough_Sex, Underage_Sex, Hurt/
      Comfort, Emotional_Hurt/Comfort, Oral_Sex, Hand_Jobs, Monsters, Inner
      Demons, Hurt_Caleb, Orgasm_Delay/Denial, Swearing, Anal_Fingering, Angst,
      Heavy_Angst, Angst_and_Feels, Top_Peter, Bottom_Caleb, Blow_Jobs, Crying,
      Men_Crying, Being_Walked_In_On, Dirty_Talk, Screaming, Tobias_is_bi
      curious_now, Tris_is_a_bitch, Overstimulation, Christina_is_awkward,
      Feels, OTP_Feels, Porn_With_Plot, Porn_with_Feelings, My_First_Work_in
      This_Fandom, I'm_Sorry, I_Will_Go_Down_With_This_Ship, I_Made_Myself_Cry,
      Biting, Anal_Sex, First_Love, First_Time, virgin_Caleb, lovemaking,
      Making_Love, Peter_is_douche, Top_Caleb, Bottom_Peter, they_both_have
      green_eyes_but_look_like_movie_peter_and_caleb
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-11-29 Words: 5662
****** Like You Wanna Be Loved ******
by Senowolf
Summary
     The one where its nearly all smut but then its feely, a little feely
     feel that hits you in your Cater feels. Then its love smut again.
     Basically it was supposed to be smutty then the feels train ran me
     over and now its splattered in feels.
     Just read it, its one of the good ones I promise.
     (Smut-feels-smut)
Notes
     So this is just, yeah just read. Also sorry for any grammer errors.
See the end of the work for more notes
“Caleb! Caleb, wait up will ya!?” Caleb felt a shiver run up his spine at the
voice calling his name.
“Damned Nose…..” Peter muttered when he caught up to the dirty blonde.
Caleb glanced a look over at the brunette and he felt his face flush when those
dark, deep green eyes met his.
“S-Sorry, I-I just, I-” The teen stuttered, his eyes widening and feeling tears
sting at his eyes making him want to shrink away and hide.
“I can’t do anything right! She hates me and it’s all because I didn’t have the
strength to fight Jeanine! I can’t use the excuse that I’m dam-damaged
anymore!” Caleb yelled and brought the heel of his hand down on his eyelid with
a soft thud.
Peter just stared and then sighed with raised brows.
“Hey you think you’re worse than me? Well if so you are wrong. Now, let's stop
thinking of this okay? Let’s go do something. Let’s get into trouble.” Peter
smiled that gorgeous smile of his, dark green eyes shimmering.
Caleb looked back up at him through his tears that were falling now, his soft
face contorted. But he nodded anyways. He looked down and then back up when a
thumb swiped slowly across his cheek. When the dark blonde looked into Peter’s
eyes, there was a dark look in them, like lust or something. Peter brought his
thumb up to his lips and licked the tear from it, moaning a little, it made
Caleb blush and stop crying.
“No one, can hate you Caleb….Not even me, and I hate a lot of people…” Peter
said while sliding his left hand up Caleb’s throat to the small curls at the
base of his neck.
The brunette then proceeded to press his lips to Caleb’s harshly with a moan
that was shared between them. The blonde felt the gasp he’d been holding back
finally leave his body in a loud rush of breath. He wound his hands in Peter’s
hair and tugged gently hearing the teen growl against his lips before felt
teeth bite into his bottom lip, earning a small yelp from Caleb.
Peter pulled away then for a second and then gripped Caleb by the collar of his
shirt and walked him back into the wall with a dull crack as the teen’s skull
knocked against the cement wall.
“Caleb, what have you done to me you Nose..” Peter said seriously then kissing
Caleb again, pushing his knee between the blondes legs and making him cry out
and rut against his thigh.
“Pete-ah! Peter we can’t-I-I can’t do this.” Caleb groaned out as he grew
unbearably hard in the black jeans he was currently in, it didn’t help that the
dark haired boy was rotating his leg and making Caleb whine.
“Please, Caleb please? I need it so bad, I need you, need you under me. Need
you calling my name so everyone knows that someone cares about you, so your
sister knows.” Peter spoke in a low, gravely voice.
Caleb shivered when those lips traced up and down his neck. They were still wet
from kissing so they left damp trails that made him clutch the brunette closer
to him. Peter trailed his hands down the other man’s sides, his hands groping
Caleb’s buttocks and making him cry out weakly as his hips thrusted forward.
Teeth nipped at the soft cords of Caleb’s soft skin, and his Adam’s apple, then
his collar bones that were peeking out from under his shirt. Peter pulled up
and away, smirking then grabbing the dizzy teen by the hand and dragging him
back to the dormitory that they shared with the others.
Peter smushed Caleb through the door roughly with a grunt of exertion when the
door came back at them and hit him in the side. He ignored the fact that
Christina and Tobias were in there, ignored when Tobias shot up and yelled at
him when he shoved Caleb.
“Peter! What are you doing-Get off of him you ass!” Tobias was about to grab
Peter who had climbed on top of the younger Prior, when he captured the
blushing boy’s lips in a heated kiss, a loud growl surpassing his thin lips.
Peter heard a loud gasp from Tobias and a squeal from Christina as he reached
down and cupped the younger teen in his large hand, squeezing when he pulled
away and watching Caleb cry out and blush deep red because the other two were
frozen in place and staring.
“Pe-TER! Th-they're still here-stop-Ah!” Caleb keened as Peter pushed his left
hand under the grey shirt the other was wearing and groaned at the feeling of
soft skin and muscle under his palm.
“To-Tobias, we have too-too get out, Tobias!” It was Christina’s voice.
The lean, muscular man was frozen on the spot though, he was honestly both
horrified and turned on. He had imagined what being with another man would be
like a few times but had been too scared to hook up with one in Dauntless, plus
he wanted his first time to be with a woman.
Christina grabbed him by the arm and drug him out of the room just as he caught
a glimpse of Caleb’s dick in Peter’s hand. Tobias closed his eyes as the dark
toned woman dragged him away from the room.
Peter pumped his hand quickly, his grip tight and the reactions from Caleb were
magnificent. Caleb was gasping for air and his chest stuttered in its heaves
and it was effecting Peter like nothing else. He smirked and then unzipped his
own pants to pull himself out.
The dirty blonde looked downward in shock and a cry filled the room as light
green eyes locked on Peter’s cock. The brunette then grabbed both their
erections in his right hand and growled low in his throat at the glorious
friction of Caleb’s cock against his own. The other teen, was making loud
sounds of pleasure, plea’s driving Peter mad with arousal and he began to fuck
his hand. The metal frame of the bed squeaked and he knew that later it was
going to be snapping against the wall and possibly break.
“Goddamn, Cale, you’re fucking gorgeous!” Peter exclaimed loudly before leaning
down and kissing Caleb’s full, red, and swollen lips.
Peter’s tongue licked around Caleb’s teeth, tasting every centimeter of his
mouth and enjoying every minute of it. He grunted in surprise when the blonde
teen began to fight back, his tongue pressing back against his while hands
tangled in his hair. Peter smirked against soft lips and pressed back harder,
hips rolling softly against Caleb’s.
The dark green eyed boy pulled away suddenly, a string of spit connecting their
lips before breaking. Peter ripped the shirt the other boy was wearing open,
buttons flying everywhere, then tore his pants from his beautifully pale legs.
Caleb shocked him as he rolled them over and nearly off the side of the slim
bed, then attacked the brunette with so much ferocity that it made Peter pause
for a minute.
The next thing he knew, he was naked. He looked downward at Caleb who was
taking in and maybe memorizing every dip and curve of the his body for future
reference, like the Erudite he was.
“Get down here Nose.” He mumbled and then grabbed the teen by his wrist and
yanked him down.
He had the blonde back under him in seconds and he attached his lips to all the
new skin that was now on display. He sucked deep red and purple marks into
Caleb’s soft skin over his throat and chest, knowing that everyone would see
the mark just under his jaw. It gave him a sense of pride knowing that everyone
would see that Caleb was his.
“You’re so damned beautiful, Caleb. So fucking perfect.” Peter realized with a
sudden surge of selflessness that surprised him.
The teen below him replied with a very arousing moan that suggested
disagreement but sorrowful joy. Peter wanted all that self hate to disappear,
wanted for Caleb to just let it go. Now that didn’t mean he wanted him to act
like himself, no he just wanted Caleb to forgive himself. The blonde arched his
back now as their bare skin touched, sweat slicking their movements and making
everything easier.
Large hands grabbed pale, lean hips. Softer, gentler hands roamed a strong
chest and muscled shoulders. This time, with a look of true care and concern,
Peter looked at Caleb like it was the first time he actually saw him. His deep
moss green eyes looking into the softer, leaf green ones below him. He felt his
breath hitch when he roamed his gaze over Caleb who was now blushing,
Gently, he leaned down and kissed Caleb’s incredibly plush lips, not caring
that his bottom lip was still slightly split from when that bitch of a sister
Tris punched him. Peter hated her, how dare she lay a hand on this perfect
human being. His cock twitched when he realized he was gonna put some
imperfections in his innocence, he’d not have it any other way. He swirled his
tongue around Caleb’s, curling his tongue like a hook behind Caleb’s front
teeth and pulled him closer so he could get a grip on the both of them once
more.
Peter ran his thumb over the head of his cock, swiping some pre-come off, and
over Caleb’s so their come mixed.
“Peter! Oh my God, do that again! Please!” Caleb was almost keening.
Peter smiled that beautiful smile, his hair a mess on his head, then pushed his
thumb down on the top of Caleb’s dick. The other teen bit back a howl when he
pushed the tip of his thumb into the slit. Caleb was shaking, his whole body
quaking from his impending orgasm, sweat making his curls stick to his
forehead. But he wasn’t allowed to come just yet.
“Not yet Cale, not yet Baby.” Peter told him with a nuzzle to the boy’s sweaty
hair. He pulled away then continued. “I wanna show you everything tonight, even
when you plead with me to stop.”
Caleb visually swallowed and then nodded, his stomach tense from willing
himself not to come. It fascinated Peter and he grunted in arousal, cock hard
and straining. It wasn’t the first time that Peter had, had sex. He had lost
that to his friend Molly back in Dauntless, not really his choice girl but
nobody wanted a newbie.
After her he had slept with a few Dauntless women, then the uprising happened
and he went with Caleb to Erudite where he fucked a cute Asian guy. Peter had
found out really quick that he enjoyed sex with men more than with women
because he could be more rough.
Now though as he was kissing down Caleb’s chest, he realized he didn’t want
anyone else. When he was just above Caleb’s navel, he stuck his tongue out and
started to lick lines up and down the boys soft abs. He trailed the tip of his
tongue around the edges of the other teens bellybutton, hearing loud gasps and
feeling the muscles of Caleb’s stomach tense up with sharp inhales.
“Oh God, Peter-uhn!”
Peter smiled and kissed below his navel, nuzzling his nose into the dark hair
of Caleb’s happy trail and inhaling deeply. Finally, after sucking and biting a
deep purple mark into the blonde’s left hip, he came down to Caleb’s manhood.
He grabbed the base, earning a gasp of pleasure, and then eyed the pre-come
leaking from the head.
“This Caleb, is called a blow job. Something I doubt you ever had the courage
to look up on the Erudite computers.” Peter said before he smeared the beaded
head over his lips like lipstick.
“OH MY FUC-!” Caleb cried out loudly, hips thrusting up.
Peter panted heavily, licking his lips clean when the blonde looked back at
him. “That’s it baby, feel this.”
He then took the whole of Caleb’s cock down his throat, his muscles flexing as
they tried to push the dick out of the back of his mouth.
Caleb shouted out loudly, loud enough that the next few rooms’ probably heard.
His hips jerked up, and a hand wound itself in dark hair that belonged to
Peter.
Peter set a agonizingly slow pace, swirling his tongue around the head and
making the blonde see the sun.
“Pe-Peter, Oh! Oh-Ah! More-Please-“ Caleb whimpered.
Peter moaned around his cock and then sped up, bobbing his head up and down, a
hand coming to wrap around the base again too keep Caleb from coming. The
blonde was a whining mess below him. His legs had been pulled up and were
laying open and limp, unless Peter gave an exceptionally hard suck, then they
would tense up and shake. Caleb was now being held down at the hips by Peter’s
free hand which was even more torturing.
“Peter I-I think I’m gonna, Oh my God I’m gonna come-AH!” Caleb full on
screamed as his orgasm was stifled by Peter’s hand, holding him in and making
coming impossible.
Caleb’s back was arched and his whole body was shuddering as Peter continued to
lick and suck on his cock that was starting to color in need of release.
Peter gave one last suck before pulling off. He kept his hand at the base of
the dick in front of himself and let his other hand remove itself from Celeb’s
hips to join his other one but started to jack the blonde off quickly with a
wicked gleam in his eyes. Caleb’s eyes were glistening and he was on the verge
of crying.
Peter stopped moving his hand finally, feeling bad because the blonde was
clearly in sexual pain. He didn’t remove his hand that was around the base
though. As Caleb’s muscles relaxed he fell back onto the thin mattress,
breathing heavily, his cock still hard.
Peter nearly lost it, then he did lose it. He abandoned his need to show Caleb
everything and shot off the bed to go over to the nightstand where he wrenched
open his drawer and grabbed the bottle of lube. He came back to the blonde and
sat down between those now bruised thighs.
“This Caleb, is the main event. I’m sure you’ve at least heard of sex, just
maybe not anal sex.”
Caleb sat up on his elbows, hair tousled and sticking every which way, his eyes
wet and making his lashes appear dark black.
“God Cale, you are so fucking perfect.”
Peter popped open the top of the bottle and then proceeded to coat his fingers
in the sweet smelling substance. Once his fingers were coated he leaned over
and kissed Caleb deeply, something sparking in his chest and making a warmth
spread throughout his chest and body. He pulled away, spit connecting itself to
their lips before it broke and fell onto Caleb’s chest promiscuously.
“This is gonna be an amazing first time…..I will make sure it is..” Peter said
then settled between Caleb’s thighs which now were thrown over his own and
wrapped around his hips. “Take a deep breath Cale…” He said then positioned his
fingers at Caleb’s virgin entrance.
The blonde inhaled deeply, then started to exhale, that's when Peter pushed the
first finger in. Caleb tensed up so Peter kissed up and down his throat softly,
soothing the teen and feeling him relax. He moved his finger around when it was
in to the knuckle, pushing against the wet walls encasing the digit.
“I’m going to push two more in okay Caleb?” Peter asked, watching the boy pant
and shudder below him.
He reached over and grabbed the lube to pour a little over his fingers and the
boys entrance. He pushed three fingers back in when he pulled the one out. He
felt Caleb inhale sharply and felt his body tense slightly before it relaxed
once again.
“Shhhhh, you have to relax.” Peter stated and started moving his hand in and
out, feeling himself throb from the sounds being made that weren’t Caleb’s
voice.
He moaned when he felt the ring of muscles around his fingers clench down.
Caleb grunted and then whined with a high voice that told Peter he was enjoying
it.
“AH!” Caleb suddenly cried out, his legs jerking.
Peter felt a smile spread over his face and he chuckled before saying, “I guess
I’ve found your pleasure spot, ey Cale?”
The blonde answered by rocking his hips back onto Peter’s fingers. The brunette
began a steady rhythm of jabbing his fingers into Caleb’s prostate while slowly
jerking him off. Peter leaned down and licked the built up precome from the
head of Caleb’s dick and moaned long and loud, hearing the older Prior’s breath
hitch in his throat.
Soon, Caleb was writhing in his spot on his back. His head was twisting from
side to side and he was thrusting his hips imperceptibly in an attempt to get
more movement but not choke Peter in the process. Peter pulled away with a loud
pop before pulling his fingers out, cock jumping when Caleb whimpered at the
loss of touch.
“Damn, Cale, you will be the death of me.” Peter all but growled while lining
himself up.
“Here we go..” Said Peter before he slowly pushed into the blonde.
Caleb inhaled sharply, holding his breath as his muscles were stretched around
the girth of Peter’s cock. His light green eyes looked down where they were
joining and he felt his breath stutter out of his burning lungs. They both
started to pant when Peter bottomed out.
“Holy shit Caleb. So tight, so-ah-!” Peter gasped when Caleb’s muscles tensed
around him.
He let his head fall into the blonde’s neck where he breathed heavily before he
kissed and licked the skin there, his hips starting to move slowly. Caleb
tensed up and threw his head back, holding still for a moment then crying out
loudly as Peter pulled away from his neck and started to thrust harder.
“Peter, ah-hah! Peter need more-“ Caleb whined through his nose.
Peter pulled almost all the way out, then slammed his hips forward, groaning at
the tight and wet walls encasing him. It felt like whenever he pulled out,
Caleb’s inside were trying to pull him back in. It was glorious.
The room was now filling with the sounds of skin on skin and loud grunts and
cries. Caleb was gasping for air and his skin was slicked with sweat that
rolled down his burning skin into the white sheets below.
Peter’s dark hair was sticking to his forehead as he thrusted into the boy
below him. He let a growl leave his lungs as he slammed his right fist down
into the pillow beside Caleb’s head from pleasure. A drop of sweat beaded on
his forehead and then ran down his nose before dropping onto Caleb’s chest.
The small metal frame to the bed was squeaking and snapping into the wall now,
it was giving off a mild clack with every thrust.
“Peter! Harder! Fuck me harder! HARDER!” Caleb keened with his back arched.
Peter pulled up so he was in a kneeling position and grabbed Caleb’s wider hips
and pulled him back so they were closer, then began to fuck the life out of the
teen. Caleb screamed in ecstasy, his eyes clenched shut as his body was taken.
“FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!” Caleb shouted.
The metal frame of the bed was now slamming into the wall with loud snaps and
squeaking in protest. Peter looked down and pulled out farther and thrusted
harder, growling with a pleasured look as he noticed something. He was fucking
Caleb so hard that his body was starting to bounce up to meet his thrusts
because the small springs in the mattress. It nearly made him come right then.
Caleb flung his legs around Peter’s waist and then reached up to yank the
brunette down once more. Their teeth clacked uncomfortably as they kissed
heatedly, panting and sharing breath. Peter bit into the boy’s bottom lip,
earning a small yelp. Caleb reciprocated by clenching his body down around
Peter’s cock.
The older teen gasped and felt his arms wobble and he almost fell onto Caleb
but managed to hold himself up. Peter pulled one hand up from the mattress and
he roughly grabbed Caleb’s cock in his hand and squeezed, hearing Caleb scream
with a high and failing voice.
Peter didn’t pause or stop when he heard the door to the dormitory fly open and
still didn’t stop when he heard Tris’ voice.
“What are you doing to-!” Tris screamed then felt her whole body blush at the
scene before her.
Caleb. Peter. Caleb below Peter. Caleb having sex with Peter. Peter was moving
in and out of Caleb so harshly she could’ve sworn her brother would break. But
he was clearly enjoying every second of it. She had came running when she had
heard her brother scream, thinking that he was in pain. She was so very wrong.
Tris felt her body tingle in arousal that made her cringe in horror before she
fled from the room with a red face and wide eyes.
Peter was biting into the thin skin of Caleb’s neck, breaking the fragile skin
and setting off a whole new round of cries and screams. Caleb was in the throws
or hot, hard sex and there was stopping any of the noises coming out of his
mouth.
“God damn you are so loud!” Peter yelled as his body started to tense up.
Caleb’s voice was failing him now and his screams were horrible broken sounds
now but none the less arousing.
“HOLY-PETER I’M-I’M COMING! OH! OUHHHHH!” Caleb fell apart below him, thin
streams of come shooting from his dick and landing on his chest and just
skimming Peter’s chest.
Peter groaned in desperation from the blonde’s orgasm. He leaned down as he
neared the edge and licked the line of come from Caleb’s chest before biting
his left nipple without mercy. Caleb was crying out from overstimulation as
Peter continued to thrust. Peter gasped and his face contorted as he finally
started to come.
“AH-AHH-! Uhhhh! Caleb! FUCK!” Peter shouted as his cock throbbed and shot his
load deep inside Caleb, painting his warm walls.
He collapsed onto Caleb’s chest found his arms wrapped around the blonde’s back
as he was worked through the strongest orgasm he ever remembered having.
“Ah, hah! Uhhhhn, uh.” Peter panted as his muscles finally started to relax.
He could hear Caleb’s heartbeat thrum in his ears as they both calmed from
their highs. It took about fifteen minutes for their breathing to slow and even
then Peter felt his eyes droop shut as sleep started to nag at him. He felt
hands carding through his thick dark hair slowly and with concern. He huffed
lowly then struggled to pull himself up on his shaking arms. Peter grunted when
he realized he was still buried to the hilt inside of Caleb.
He looked down at Caleb and felt his heart stutter in his ribcage at the sight.
Caleb looked so relaxed and calm like a mother looked after she had given birth
and was seeing her beloved for the first time, it was the same kind of
happiness. With his hair all mussed up and his lips swollen and red, with
lovebites and blemishes coloring his body up and down and eyelids half closed.
He looked so at peace and happy right now that Peter wanted nothing more than
to fall back down and fall asleep with him.
He felt the monster in his mind protest and he found himself standing up and
pulling his pants on hurriedly.
“Pet-er?” Caleb’s soft….beautiful…….deceiving…lying voice called softly.
Peter turned to look back at the boy who was now sitting up, his hair
completely flat on one side and sticking every which way on the other.
“What.” Peter asked coldly, face hardening.
He felt his face soften when Caleb cringed back with a look of a kicked puppy
crossing his face.
“Nothing. Never mind I-I’m sorry I-“ Caleb stopped trying to speak as his chin
wobbled and his shoulders strained as he tried to keep them from shaking.
A broken sound tore itself from his throat and Peter felt himself start to melt
at the sound of Caleb’s overly fucked out voice failing him, making his crying
sound so much more sorrowful. He debated what to do as the blonde’s eyes
brimmed with tears that started to pour down his face as his peaceful resolve
finally broke and he started to choke on his sobs.
Peter turned back around and with a strained shrug he walked out of the room,
feeling nothing but sickness twisting at his stomach and tying him up in knots.
He felt rage broil up and he found himself throwing his balled up hands against
the wall.
He was a monster. He didn’t deserve someone as beautiful and loving like Caleb.
And he sure as hell knew he wasn’t kind enough to have him. The beast inside
him, it made him incapable of having someone to love, without breaking them.
Peter knew that he would only break him like glass if he kept him for himself.
He was selfish and cold and rough and always had to have control. There was no
way that could correlate with Caleb, who was selfless when he needed to be and
warm and soft and everything Peter was not.
It was everything a tragic love affair was. The beauty and the beast, but they
didn’t and wouldn’t have a happy ending like Peter wanted. He had to be
selfless just this once. He wouldn’t forgive himself if he ruined Caleb anymore
than he already had. Peter didn’t know what to do, he wanted to shove it and do
what was right just this once and let what he wanted go. If he let Caleb go,
and if the boy really wanted him….He’d come back……That’s what that one poem
stated in a book Peter had come across.
His head whipped up when he saw Caleb stumble out into the hallway, his face
red and puffy from crying. Caleb staggered on his feet when their eyes met.
“Peter, please. I know that you think you’re a monster. But you’re not, not
with me. I saw it.” Caleb cooed as he made his way down the hall to him.
Peter growled as he came closer but it did nothing to the blonde and in less
than a minute he was pinned against the wall by the slightly younger boy who
was holding his face in his hands and begging with him.
“Please, Peter. You’re the only one who has seen me as human these past weeks.
I’m asking you to please let me help you.” His green eyes were red and filling
with tears.
“Caleb, let go of me. I can’t and won’t give you what you want. It was a
mistake what we did. I won’t lie and say that it wasn’t one of the most amazing
fucks of my life because it was. But that is all it was. Nothing but a rough
fuck.” Peter glowered coldly down at Caleb.
Caleb’s face fell and he let him go easily and then fell back into the wall
behind him. His face contorted as he stifled his cries and tried to stop the
flow of tears.
When he got a pretty good hold on his emotions he whispered, “That’s all it was
too you? Just a simple, high escalated fuck? Is that all my virginity was too
you? Jus-just some fuck!?” Caleb screamed the last part as he once again fell
apart, this time not in pleasure or pain, but in betrayal.
Peter fought with himself and then slammed his head against the wall in outrage
at the sound of Caleb’s angered curses and cries.
“No…” He growled.
“No? No, what.” Caleb pleaded, his anger fading away much too quickly for
Peter’s liking. It was replaced with a glossy and dazed expression that made
his heart speed up.
“It wasn’t some fuck. You are so much more than that to me Cale. You have no
idea. I didn’t even know until tonight. Dammit..” Peter swore.
“I want you so much for myself Caleb but if I have you I’ll only destroy you.
Can’t you see? I’m a monster. I hate who I am and what I have become. I’ve
killed just to be accepted, I almost killed your sister just cause I hated her!
I. Am. A. Monster. I don’t deserve you.” Peter said sadly, letting his own
emotions get the better half of him.
“I’m weak. I peck off whoever disobeys me and anyone who is a threat to me. I
kill off the weaker ones so they don’t get in my way. I’m a monster, a blood
thirsty, cold hearted beast with sadistic pleasures in seeing people in pain
and-“
“Stop!” Caleb shouted suddenly from across the hall.
His bright green eyes were squinted and red but the determined look didn’t
wain. His eyebrows were knitted together and his lips were pursed together
firmly.
“You think you are any worse than me? I almost killed my own sister lest you
forgot. I have indirectly killed people, loads of them Peter. I was the one
helping Jeanine. I helped her control the Dauntless and kill most of my old
faction. It’s mainly my fault my own parents are dead-my-my fault. That is on
my hands.” Caleb dwindled into silence.
“Please let me help you Peter, don’t push me away. You might as well kill me
than push me away. It would much more merciful than watching you from
afar…..I’m fragile, I break easily. I’m weak and vulnerable. But I can’t stand
anything more than watching from a distance, it would destroy whats left of
me.” Caleb whispered.
Peter stared blankly for a moment then crawled forward on his hands and knees
so he was in front of the blonde.
“I don’t want to hurt you Cale, not you. I’m doing this because I am afraid of
breaking you. You’re so perfect, and beautiful. If I ruined that I could never
forgive myself.” Peter said with a shaking chin.
Soft, warm hands ran over his cheeks and pulled him into an even softer and
warmer chest. Peter let go of the string of pride he’d been clinging too and
finally let himself feel everything wholly now. He clenched his fingers over
Caleb’s shoulder and cried his eyes out, all the pent up anger and stress
flushing out with each shaky breath until he could only hear the heartbeat in
his ears and feel those hands run through his hair and over his back.
He was still staring blankly when Caleb moved against him. Peter tensed up and
involuntarily tightened his grip on Caleb’s shoulder and arm.
“Sh, sh, shh…….C’mon, stand up Peter….” Caleb cooed lightly while helping him
to his feet.
Peter followed close behind the blonde, their hands clasped together as they
walked. They were both different levels of monster. If Caleb could fight it so
could Peter. They were back in the dorm now, Caleb on top of Peter and kissing
him gently.
Cold….Stone…..Cruel…..Peter was below Caleb, kissing back softly. He was giving
away his control, putting his trust in someone else. Peter was letting him in.
He was going to let him in, let him see him for what he was and not what he had
been. He was going to fight for control over his monster, was going to let
Caleb tame it and care for it with his love and devotion. And Peter would in
turn protect and keep Caleb’s monster safe, he was going to heal him somehow.
They took their time this round. Caleb slowly opening Peter up, slowly sucking
marks into the brunette’s tanned skin. Their tongues trailing over each others
bodies with Caleb’s hips rotating in small, passionate circles while Peter
adjusted to his size. Then their teeth claiming each others skin with soon to
be scars. Their ragged breathes shared and their voices calling the others name
loud enough for just them to hear.
And finally their falling points, Peter calling to Caleb, begging him for
something he couldn’t form in words. Caleb answering with a loud drawn out moan
and soft kisses to his stretched throat.
Neither missed what they had been trying to say during their throes. They knew
what was meant, they knew but didn’t say anything. Instead, Caleb curled into
Peter’s chest and kissed just above the spot where his heart would be, then put
the flat of his hand there and looked up into the moss green eyes with his
light ones.
Peter nodded in understanding and then wrapping himself over Caleb’s taller
body and held him close. So much had happened in the past week, so much had
been revealed and grown. Pulling the sheets over them, Peter buried his nose
into the crook of Caleb’s neck and took a deep breath, satisfied in such a way
that all his energy was gone and left him falling into the best sleep he’d had
in forever.
They’d both wake up to each other the next morning. Everyone else in the dorm
and staring at them with accusing glares and questions threw at them like
knives. They wouldn’t answer of course and would just stare at each other and
smile with glints in their green eyes. Eventually the room would clear out and
it would just be them once again. Then and only then would they make a secret
promise to put each other back together, to heal the other.
They would make a vow to fix each other.
End Notes
     Was it any good? Or did I do it sickly and just fail?
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