Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/8228105. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Homestuck Relationship: Dave's_Bro_|_Beta_Dirk_Strider/Dave_Strider Character: Dave's_Bro_|_Beta_Dirk_Strider, Dave_Strider, Rose_Lalonde Additional Tags: Dubious_Consent, Stridercest_-_Freeform, Alternate_Universe_-_No_Sburb Session, self-indulgence, Eventual_Smut, Some_Plot, Forgive_my_sins_Jesus Stats: Published: 2016-10-06 Updated: 2017-02-05 Chapters: 5/? Words: 11517 ****** Libido ****** by Karkalicious769 Summary Bro has heard all the names. Pedophile. Creep. Monster. Most of these names are told by himself, though. Because - shit - hot or not, a parent can’t just be attracted to their kid. And they certainly shouldn’t do anything about it. “Shouldn’t.” Meaning “past tense.” As in, “oh God, what the fuck did I just do?” Notes See the end of the work for notes ***** Day 0 ***** Chapter Notes So, I took a break from my usual DaveKat to write a self-indulgence fic. I didn’t write this to be criticized for what I like, so if you only came here to bitch about BroDave and everything wrong with it (believe me, I know) then you can just leave now. Trust me, I’ve heard everything. This probably won’t even be good anyway. Go find a better fic if you wanna complain. He read somewhere that watching your kid sleep is a perfectly normal thing for parents to do. They like to watch their breathing - make sure that it's steady. Make sure that their kid isn't have a bad dream. Some parents like to watch and simply remember the good times - back when they were the center of each other's world. Before they started growing up. Yes, Bro could be watching Dave sleep for any of those touching and socially acceptable reasons. But he isn't. Instead, he's focusing on Dave's lips. The slight part of them as he breathes. He wonders what they would feel like against his - would they be soft, or chapped, like Bro's? He studies the flush to Dave's normally pale skin. Because it's always too hot in Texas, but he still insists upon sleeping with the blankets pulled all the way up to his chin. He used to stand and watch from the doorway, back when his intentions were innocent, but now Bro stands next to Dave's bedside. He's lucky his charge is a heavy sleeper, otherwise he would never get away with this. He reaches out, tracing a finger down Dave's jaw so lightly that he isn't even sure himself if he’s making contact. His blonde hair is a mess, as it always is when Dave sleeps, and Bro brushes it out of his kid's face, running his fingers through the soft strands gently. He has to ask Dave for his hair care regimen some day. It's as soft as silk and slips through his fingers like sand. When Dave rolls over and sighs softly in his sleep, Bro takes it as his cue to leave. It means that the pleasant feelings are breaching Dave's sleep-laden mind and making their way into his dreams. At the very least, Dave almost never complains about nightmares anymore. Not that it makes Bro feel any less disgusting. Every night is a hollow and greedy victory. He absconds back to his room before Dave can wake, sliding under his covers and doing his best to sleep. He isn't thinking about Dave. He isn't thinking about his little brother's lips wrapped around him. And he certainly isn't thinking about the teasing smirk Dave would give him, practically taunting Bro as he kisses up his length before finally taking it into his mouth, going slowly and daring Bro to lose his cool. His eyes sly and smug while he takes Bro at an achingly slow pace. It takes all if his willpower to not grab Dave's hair and just ram in completely. Bro gives up, kicking the sheets off of him and pushing his boxers out of the way. He strokes himself slowly, like Dave would do, imagining that it's his brother pleasing him instead of himself. It's sick and wrong, and the fact that he only lasts a few minutes with that fantasy makes a small curl of self-hatred pool in the pit of his stomach. Dave probably wouldn't swallow - at least not the first time. He's such a smug and prideful little shit. It would probably take some… encouragement. But imagining all the ways he could “encourage” his charge to deepthroat him isn't doing anyone any favors. So Bro grabs some tissues, cleans up the mess, then turns over and tries to convince himself that the feelings will go away. They won't of course, but it’s okay to lie to yourself every now and again. The feelings have been growing and festering inside of him since Dave turned fourteen. It was around the kid's birthday that Bro began to notice all the ways his charge was… changing. He shot up like a weed almost overnight. His baby fat melted away thanks to their constant strifes, and the sharp, well- defined angles of his body became hard to ignore. His broad shoulders, and the muscles he was finally beginning to develop. Bro had never had a thing for blondes before, but he found himself wondering if Dave's hair was as soft as it looked. If he would look any better without his shades on. Or his clothes. He had done his research - and what he was feeling wasn't pedophilia. That implies a small, underdeveloped child, which just make Bro's skin crawl with unease. But though Dave is far from being a child anymore, it doesn't mean that being attracted towards the kid you raised isn't wrong. They weren't related (the kid had just been dumped on his doorstep when Bro was seventeen), but as Dave's legal guardian, that would still put him under arrest for incest and rape if he took this where it shouldn't be and people found out. The age of consent in Texas is seventeen, because yeah, he cared enough to do his homework. Dave has only recently turned sixteen though, and Bro is pretty certain that he’s straight. He never mentioned any guys, but they didn't really talk enough for him to mention girls, either, so it didn't hurt to lean on the side of caution. Bro isn't even sure if Dave likes him anymore. Actually, fuck everything. Bro doesn't need to be looking these things up at all because nothing is going to happen. He’s just noticing Dave's changes and progression towards becoming a young man. Nothing more will come of it. People just don't do that. “Dave.” Bro pushes his bedroom door open without knocking, leaning against frame. He taught Dave not to knock before entering a room. Knocking isn't cool. “Roof in five.” He says, his sword sheathed and resting on one shoulder. They haven't been up there in a while, but Dave doesn't hesitate before nodding. He looks to be talking to one of his online friends - the one with the grey text - and he’s sitting at his computer in just a pair of jeans. Not that Bro notices that. Of course Dave can be shirtless in his room. It's his room. And Bro definitely isn't checking him out and noting in approval all the ways Dave has filled out over the years. The way his jeans rest just low enough on his hips to give Bro a good look at untanned skin is completely unnoticeable. The curve of his ass as he sits, and the way said ass would feel sitting on something else- He shuts the door too loudly behind him as he leaves, his heart racing and the grip on his sword just a little too tight. Damn. Fuck Dave for being so appealing. Kids his age aren't supposed to look like that. They're supposed to be gangly and awkward. Not pornstar material. He shouldn't be strifing with Dave. They only stopped in the first place because the close proximity and the way Dave looked when he was sweating and out of breath was getting hard to handle. The only reason they're strifing now is because Bro has some frustrations he needs to air. And Dave can always use the practice. Dave arrives on the roof exactly five minutes after Bro. He isn't entirely sure how  Dave always gets his timing right down to the second, but he probably does it to annoy his brother. Like most other things. There's no little head nod to signal that they're starting. No handshake or stupid bow. Dave comes up with his shitty sword already unsheathed and held properly, and he drops into a fighting stance. Bro takes off, flash stepping around his brother almost too fast for him to keep track of. Almost. Dave has gotten better at it since they first began training. Still, all he can do is turn around before Bro is swooping in. He aims just for little nicks and cuts, catching Dave's cheek, his shirt, the hem of his completely impractical jeans. Dave brings his own sword up, deflecting Bro and getting a bit of his hair cut off instead of taking it to his forearm. The swords make the horrible grating sound of metal on metal as they connect, and Dave visibly winces. That was a mistake, as Bro quickly takes the opportunity to flip his sword around and nail Dave squarely in the chest. He stumbles back, a little dazed, but no less prepared to fight. Bro thinks that his determination is cute, and he finds his inexperience even cuter. But Dave does try, and that's worth something. Bro flash steps away, and they begin again. An hour later, and Bro is beginning to think that Dave is about to pass out. He wavers on his feet, his stance too open and the grip on his sword less than mediocre. But maybe that was Bro's fault for pushing him so hard. He puts a hand on Dave's chest, grabbing his shirt tightly and sweeping his feet out from under him, sending him to the ground. He groans weakly as his body hits the floor, and Bro does his best to think PG thoughts as he straddles his brother and keeps him pinned down. “You’re getting sloppy, Dave.” He says roughly, face perfectly blank as always as he stares down at the boy beneath him. “Only got a few hits in. Maybe we should be doing this more often.” A little bit of blood sprinkles Bro's white shirt, almost as a permanent reminder of what happened. It was a lucky hit - Dave managed to catch Bro on the neck and broke the skin. Nothing deep luckily, but he can still do better. Dave pants heavily, glaring up at Bro as best he can. “Or maybe you should just find a hobby healthier than beating the shit out of children.” He fires back, reaching up to wipe away the blood dripping from his nose with his sleeve. That injury was the result of a wayward punch, but nothing broke, so the two of them had continued on with the strife. Bro snorts, leaning in a little closer. “I'll stop when you grow a pair and start trying. Really, Dave. Am I   that hard to beat?” He falls silent, simply staring at Bro as he breathes. Suddenly, the older male is incredibly aware of their position. Dave, beneath him, sweating and gasping and completely unable to fight back against anything Bro might want to do. It was… quite the opportunity. Dave blinks in surprise, his eyes widening behind his shades. “Bro, what are you doing?” His hands were now resting on Dave's waist, pushing his shirt up just a little and rubbing small circles in his skin. He's being careful, seeing how far he can go before Dave interjects. “Nothing.” Bro says dismissively, pushing his hands up further and tracing along his ribcage. “What? A guy can't feel up his little brother and make sure that he's developing properly?” Dave squirms underneath him, his face flushing as he looks up at Bro in confusion and frustration. “Bro, that's not-” He begins to protest, only to be cut off as he moans quietly. Bro smirks, tugging on his nipples again, a little harder, earning himself a small whimper from the boy beneath him. “That's not what? Speak up, Dave.” Bro teases, his confidence in these actions growing. He’s so close to Dave now - close enough to see the light freckles dotting his skin. He would be more tan if he wasn’t albino, but the freckles are still a nice touch. Maybe Bro should have Dave come outside more. Or maybe he should just keep touching his brother. For the moment, Dave isn't protesting or seriously fighting him, and that’s important. Consent is important, especially in such a delicate situation. Dave swallows hard, reaching up and digging his fingers into Bro’s shirt. “Bro- ” He groans quietly, embarrassment and unhappy pleasure flashing across his face. “No, stop - this is-” Wrong. Bro doesn’t want to hear Dave say it. He’s perfectly aware of what he’s doing. He moves one hand up to cup the back of Dave’s head, the other going down to hold his waist gently. Their lips brush against each other, and any argument Dave is about to make dies on his lips. He isn’t struggling any more at least, and Bro takes that as the go ahead to continue. As he had guessed before, Dave’s lips are very soft. They’re motionless against his, but that’s to be expected. His fingers tangle in the younger’s hair, and Bro uses his hold to pull Dave up closer. A small gasp leaves his mouth as the kiss is deepened, Bro easing his tongue past Dave's lips and groaning quietly at the feeling. Everything feels like it’s burning, but he isn’t satisfied with this at all. Kissing Dave is everything he had never wanted to dream it was, and all it does is stoke his passion higher. Dave whimpers quietly, pushing against his brother’s chest weakly to get him off. Bro opens his eyes behind his shades, watching Dave's expressions filter and change through the ordeal. And Dave doesn’t look upset. Rather, he looks confused and guilty and ashamed of himself. The kiss ends abruptly, and the warmth is immediately gone as Bro climbs to his feet. All he feels now is cold. “Ugh, Bro-” Dave tries as he pushes himself up into a sitting position. His sentence abruptly halts as he looks around, only to find that Bro is gone and that he’s alone. He sighs, falling back against the roof, and does his best to ignore the uncomfortable tightness in his pants. “Fuck.” ***** Day 7 ***** Chapter Notes How about a P.O.V. change?         A week flew by faster than Dave had anticipated.     It seemed like just the other day Bro had shoved his tongue down his throat, but apparently not. He hasn’t seen or heard anything from his guardian in that time. As far as he knows, Bro is on the fucking moon. He thought to check his brother’s room on day three - just to be sure - but he can’t go in there. That area is strictly off limits. And Bro would definitely find out if Dave tried to invade his personal space. He always does.     It’s a Saturday and the middle of July, so Dave has no reason to get out of bed early. The only reason he moves at all actually, is because the TV in the living room is on and the noise is preventing him from enjoying sleep properly. Dave doesn’t really remember leaving the TV, but he was pretty tired when he finally shuffled to bed last night. He wouldn't put it past himself.     He yawns, stepping out into the living room in his pajamas. Which is just a pair of boxers. It’s too hot in Texas to sleep in anything else, especially when one takes into consideration his faulty air conditioning. Bro has tinkered with it, and so have professionals. Evidently, it just hates them, because no one has yet to find a single thing wrong with the wiring.     Speaking of Bro, he’s taking up the entirety of the couch. And he’s using the TV to watch My Little Pony. And not even the newest version, which is at least tolerable. He’s watching the old version where Rarity is a disgusting color of pink and a princess andan earth pony. Dave hates the show, but Bro has made sure that he knows all of the main differences between the old cast and the newest one. Forget paying taxes, thisis information that will be totally helpful later in life. (Sarcasm heavily implied.)     Sometimes he forgets that his Bro is a complete nerd.     “Play it a little louder, why don’t you?” Dave rolls his eyes, stepping past him and into the kitchen for breakfast without making eye-contact. “I don’t think the neighbors can hear yet. And what better way to wake up on a Saturday than by listening to poorly-plotted lessons of friendship at six in the morning?” Dave says sarcastically.     They don’t even play that show on TV anymore. Or, at least, not on any channel they have. Not that it matters, because Bro has every season on DVD. Sadly, he does it unironically, too. It stopped being funny when Dave was five.         Bro doesn't reply, but the TV gets a little louder, so Dave guesses that he heard him.         Yawning, Dave opens the fridge to see what they have for breakfast. About a year or two ago - around the same time as Lil' Cal's disappearance - Bro stopped keeping his swords in there, but that still doesn't mean that there's food. Both of them are too lazy to shop most of the time, so usually it's just leftover takeout and snack foods. Not really a great diet, but Dave’s metabolism is high enough for him to not give a damn.         He bends down, pushing aside the takeout on the lower shelf (Chinese - Italian on the shelf above), and reaching for the apple juice he knows that he stashed in the back. When he doesn’t see it though, he scowls, straightening back up and shutting the fridge         “Bro, where did you-?” He starts to ask his brother where he put the apple juice, but when he tries to step back, he makes sudden contact with the aforementioned brother's torso, hardened and solid after decades of careful exercises. Dave’s impact - unsurprisingly - doesn't shake Bro in the slightest. It just causes him to push back against the fridge to put some distance between the two, and Bro takes the opportunity to grip Dave’s waist tightly.         “Dave.” He says seriously, and Bro’s breath tickles the back of his neck pleasantly. “We need to talk. About that incident on the roof.”         And there's what he wanted to avoid.         Dave tries to keep himself under control. His lips tingle at the memory of what happened, and he has to suppress a shiver. Did Bro know how much he liked it? How disappointed and disgusted with himself he was after his guardian left? Because he isDave’s guardian. He raised Dave. Bro shouldn't touch him like that, but Dave had wanted him to.         He closes his eyes. “I don't want to.” Dave tells him stiffly, struggling experimentally in the vice-like grip on his waist. Bro just holds him tighter though, so it looks like he's stuck.         Bro's lips brush along the nape of his neck, and this time, Dave can't help the pleased shiver that works its way down his spine at the feeling. “I think you do, though.” He insists softly, the hands on Dave’s hips inching towards to front. Bro squeezes his thighs gently, and Dave inadvertently lets out a barely audible whimper. “Don't pretend you didn't like it. Or that you don't like it now.” Bro's voice takes on a hardened edge, and Dave falls silent. His mouth is too dry to form words now, not that it matters. Bro wouldn't listen to his protests anyway. They both know that denying anything Bro just said would be lying. And he doesn't tolerate when Dave lies.         Bro kisses the bottom of Dave's hairline softly, inching his way up his neck like he has all the time in the world. Dave quickly grows uncomfortable, for reasons that involve impatience more than any desire to push Bro away. His lips burn against Dave's cold skin, and when Bro's tongue darts out to tease the shell of his ear, he can't help the moan that comes out.         He hums in approval, nipping at Dave's earlobe teasingly. “You sound better than I imagined.” Bro tells him with a smirk, and goddammit if his words don't send a wave of heat directly to Dave's already hard cock.         Because he actually imagined it. Bro imagined Dave moaning for him, and probably doing a lot of other things. He doesn't know how long Bro has wanted him. Dave doesn't know why it even matters how long he's waited. The fact remains that it's illegal. He's underage andBro is his legal guardian. Which means that this needs to stop, regardless of how much Dave likes it.         “Bro-” He gasps out, his hands flat against the fridge as he squirms in his brother's hold. “You need to stop-”         And just like that, Bro does.         The weight holding Dave in place is gone without warning, and he feels strangely cold without Bro's warmth all over him.         His heart pounds as Dave turns back around to face Bro. He's not there, though. He has to search for a moment, but his gaze lands on Bro sitting at the couch once more. He's still watching that awful show - completely relaxed as if he hadn't just been touching Dave and talking about how he wanted his younger brother.         Suddenly, Dave isn't hungry. He doesn't want to be around Bro until he can work out his confused feelings. So - still flushed bright red - Dave walks back to his room as fast as possible, not looking over his shoulder or even at Bro at all as he leaves.         The walk to his room seems longer than ever before, and Dave practically sprints the final few steps, slamming the door closed behind him and locking it with shaky hands. Bro can unlock it easily if he wants to, but it still gives Dave a sense of security.         He curls up on his bed - blankets and pillows surrounding him on all sides like a fortress - and tries to cry. Dave really tries. After all, he was just sexually assaulted by his brother. He should be beside himself with tears, right? So… why isn't he? Dave should be mentally traumatized by this. But instead, all he wants to do is go back out there and ask Bro to continue. ***** Day 15 ***** Chapter Notes In unrelated news: I have no idea what I'm doing with this story (or my life) anymore. See the end of the chapter for more notes Dave managed to avoid Bro for a good nine days. And Bro knows this because he counted. Every passing minute, the guilt and shame increased until it was ripping him apart from the inside out. Why did he do something like that? Why couldn't he have just sat Dave down and had a normal conversation? They could have worked it out, swept it all under the rug, and pretended like nothing happened. Instead, he ended up giving Dave a boner. Of course, physical reactions don't mean jack shit when it comes to actual consent, but it's still a good sign, right? That maybe Dave could like it, too? That maybe he likes it right now? Because Bro just can't bring himself to fully regret his actions. Images of Dave - flushed and breathing hard and pinned down beneath him - keep Bro up at night. During the day, he distracts himself by either occupying himself in his room or heading out and doing DJ gigs. Not only does it get him out of the house, but it also brings in money. The world doesn't stop just because Bro is attracted to his little brother. Life is nonstop, and that means he needs money to pay taxes. At least the job pays well and has long hours. Plenty of time to spend awayfrom Dave. Maybe that will help the feelings fade. That idea soon proves to be completely incorrect, though. He's watching My Little Ponyagain, but not the older version. That is something he usually only watches to bother Dave, since Bro doesn't enjoy it even ironically. He used to not actually like the Friendship Is Magic adaption, but after Cal just vanished on him, he sort of grew to like it. Kind of a lot. He's actually started to like a lot of things, not just including Dave. Cal wouldn't like that, but he's most likely gone for good, so what does Bro care? Looking back, he can't actually answer that. Why didhe care? Why did he hang on to Cal so much? Why did he let a fucking puppettell him what to do? God, the first thirteen years of Dave's life were awful. Most of the things were Cal's idea, but Bro isn't going to let himself off the hook that easily. He could have - fuck- told Cal that the fridge isn't a good place for swords or something. But he didn't, and that's no one's fault except his own. His mind was weak - easily influenced and pliable. Bro really didn't stand a chance. He was doomed as soon as he got his hands on that puppet. He really fucked up as a parent, but Bro can't help but want to make it up to Dave. It's a little too late to try being a dad, but maybe he could be good in some other way? Certainly, there are other ways to make people feel good. And that's really what he wants, isn't it? To make Dave feel good? No. He can't give himself a break on that, either. He's being selfish. That's all this is. But if he can make Dave feel good too… does that make is less selfish? Slightly less demented? Bro can't think of a good answer to that. Probably yes in most cases, but this… this isn't exactly "most cases" so there's not really an easy answer. The next time he sees Dave, he grips his self-control tightly and doesn't let himself look directly at his brother. Bro guesses that the younger male thought he was home alone, because when he steps out of his room, he freezes when he sees Bro sitting on the couch. Dave is wearing nothing but his boxers - not even his shades - and if the change of clothes under his arm is any indication, he intends to take a shower. Thatimage is quickly and forcefully pushed from Bro's subconscious. Both of them are still for a long pause, like they're trying to see which one of them is going to move first. The silence stretches on for a solid minute, then Dave opens his mouth. "I…" He tries, but he soon trails off, and nothing else follows. Bro never thought he would find his kid's off button, but now that he has, it's… a lot less exciting than he thought it would be. The silence returns, but this time, it's Bro that breaks it. He sighed shakily, licking his dry lips before speaking. "You gonna get in the shower before my self-control snaps?" Bro asks quietly, his voice low and rough with effort. Dave just stares. He doesn't say anything or try to leave, even after a solid ten seconds, which is unfortunate, because that's exactly how long Bro's self- control lasts. He's on his feet before he can stop himself (not that he wantsto stop himself), pushing Dave up against the wall and kissing him roughly. The clothes under his arm fall to the floor, but neither one of them cares. It was never this hard to resist temptation before. But like Bro said before- his mind is weak. That should bother him, but it doesn't. He's stopped caring. Dave whines into the kiss, clawing at Bro's shirt and trying to pushing him away weakly, but his efforts grow noticeably less desperate the longer Bro keeps it up. His hands aren't pushing anymore, just gripping Bro's shirt so tight that his hands are shaking, his knuckles are white, and Bro needs to be closer. Even with Dave not wearing a shirt, it feels like there's too many layers between them. His hands don't hesitate this time. One holds Dave's hips against the wall tightly, and the other one works it's way down the front of Dave's boxers. Bro doesn't touch him immediately, though. He starts by tracing the outside of Dave's thighs, closing his eyes and really feelingthem. He's trying to commit Dave to memory, since there's a good chance that he won't be able to get this close ever again. He goes further up, massaging Dave's sides. His brother looks so incredible without his shirt on, and this is the first time Bro has actually been able to touch him since he was five and their relationship was slightly less unhealthy. He trails his fingers over Dave's torso, mapping out the small hills where his ribs were visible through his skin, tracing the scars he acquired during strifing accidents, rubbing the softness of his stomach, and brushing over his nipples just hard enough to make Dave shiver. Bro loves this. This selfish indulgence of his. There's no way he isn't going to Hell, and Dave will probably hate him for this, but fuck it all if it isn't worth it. The kiss breaks as Bro takes to marking his neck instead. Dave whines in protest, shaking his head and trying to push away. It's funny, though. He doesn't look like he wants to push Bro away. His charge looks like he wants to pull him closer, but it took Bro years to accept the way Dave makes him feel, so the guardian really isn't surprised as he repeats his rehearsed lines. "Bro, for fucks sake, st-" He goes to say, only to be cut off when a moan rips through him. Even though Dave's hips bones had felt incredible beneath Bro's fingers - that forbidden area of skin that he had wanted to touch for so long- he had to deal with more… pressing matters. If Dave's creamy thighs are magic, then the feeling of his little brother's cock throbbing in his hand is perfection.Bro almost moans just from that, but of course, he doesn't. He has more self control than Dave will ever have. His hand is slow - careful and deliberate with his movements. Bro wants to remember this in detail. He wants to feel every inch of Dave beneath his fingertips, encouraging his brother to full hardness beneath him. It doesn't take long, and Dave's knees are soon reduced to jelly as he clings to Bro even tighter to remain standing. His moans sound like a song, they're so damn perfect. Dave has a moan that is better than any pornstar Bro has ever heard, because they're real. Each one sends waves of heat to Bro's already hard cock as he gives his little brother a handjob, cursing the day Dave hit puberty and became downright irresistible. For a while now, he hasn't been seeing his brother. Bro has been seeing all the thingshe could do to Dave. Things that would make him scream and beg for more and claw at the bed sheets beneath him because it just feels so fucking good. Bro gives Dave's neck one last, hard suck, pulling back to admire his handiwork as suddenly everything freezes. His hand is still holding Dave's swollen cock, hidden from view thanks to his boxers. Frowning a little, Bro tugs at them a little, and Dave let's out a small whine as his head is exposed to the cool air of the apartment. Resisting the urge to lick his lips, Bro sweeps his thumb across the tip experimentally. His skin comes away wet with pre-cum, and Dave absolutely melts in his touch, letting out a throaty moan that he must have been holding in. Dave's skin is flushed a light red, and he's breathing hard, staring at Bro with half-lidded eyes. His pants for breath are almost as delicious as his moans, and Bro finds him drinking them in all the same. The marks left on Dave's skin are going to leave a nice bruise, and Bro loves that he has the ability to claim him like that. He didn't bite or suck very hard, so they'll be gone in a few days, but Bro admires them all the same. "You look so beautiful like this." He breathes, pressing kisses to Dave's neck where he left teeth marks. The word "beautiful" doesn't fit at all with Bro's personality (the way Dave's eyes widen at it's usage highlights his surprise), but it describes Dave exactly. Regardless of how cheesy it is. "I want you to want this, Dave." Bro confesses, kissing along his brother's neck and pulling his hands out of his boxers to grip Dave's hips. "It'd be so easy to take it, but I want you to give me permission. You have no idea how long I've wanted this. You're driving me crazy, Dave." His voice takes on an edge of possessiveness, lust making him forget himself as he admits to Dave things he would never say in his right mind. as his leg works it's way between Dave's thighs, pressing up against his still hard cock. Bro kisses greedily, wanting to get his lips everywhere. There is just so much of Dave for him to explore. He wants everything. It's overwhelming, and he's getting dizzy with want. "Bro-" Dave gasps out his name, remembering how to speak as he tries to wriggle his hips away. "Oh my God, come on! Stop-" It's that same word again. The one Bro hates but the one he won't let himself ignore. Instantly, he pulls away from Dave, leaving him as a mess in the hallway as he absconds to his room. Bro realized a few days ago something that he had been struggling over for a long time. It isn't just about the sex. He tried that. He tried bringing women home from the clubs he would work at, and when that didn't work, he tried men. He tried for so long that he almost forgot why he was having so much sex in the first place. But unfortunately, he didn't. He saw Dave every day. Every morning, he was there, not even doing anything all that noteworthy. Just watching TV. But Bro would stare at him for hours anyway. No, it isn't sex he's after. It's Dave. It would be so fucking easy if all he wanted was sex. Pills exist that will dramatically reduce your sex drive, thus fixing the problem. But there is no pills for love. And as terrifying as it is, that's what Bro is beginning to feel. Chapter End Notes I need… serious help. At least the next chapter is… slightly better. ***** Day 19 ***** Chapter Notes You have no fucking clue how long it took me to figure out how color the text. It takes Dave four days to figure out that he can't riddle this one out alone. Oh, sure, he tried. He locked himself in his room and did nothing but think for as long as he could stand it. All he did was go in circles. Bro is his guardian. The excessive age gap is illegal, even if the Internet claims that it's not technically pedophilia. It's still wrong. It should feel wrong. He should call a help line or the police or something and report parent incest and sexual abuse. It's abuse if Bro touches him, right? Which he did. So he should feel sick and disgusted and used. But Dave doesn't. Bro said that he wanted Dave's consent. So… maybe it’s about more than just sex? It's already illegal. What would tacking rape on top of everything else do? Nothing. Just more years in jail if anyone finds out. And Bro hasn't even taken away Dave's phone or grounded him to keep him from leaving. Which means that he has Bro's trust, even though that is incredibly dangerous to risk in such a delicate situation. On Friday, Dave slips out of the house while Bro is asleep and heads towards the park. A nice quiet place to sit and ask Rose for help via Pesterchum. He left a note as a second thought, just explaining where he's going and when he should be back. He doesn't want Bro to worry or come looking for him, after all. The real problem though, is how he was going to explain this situation to Rose without giving away what was happening at home. She would blow it out of proportion. Well, it is already out of proportion, but still. Bro isn't hurting him. He wants Dave's consent and to make him feel good. That's not abuse, is it? It's still unethical though, and Dave's mind is spinning as he walks. He wants Bro at least physically but that could just be the hormones talking. How is Dave supposed to know if he actually fully wants this? The park is only a few blocks away, and Dave arrives quicker than he expected. But that's fine. He isn't looking forward to this conversation or having Rose trying to analyze his fucked up brain, but what else is he supposed to do? He doesn't have anyone else to turn to who could help. Besides a professional therapist. But while Rose might ask questions, Dave can avoid answering them pretty easily over text. In person? Not so much. He takes a seat on one of the benches lining the paths, directly across from the fountain and the playground for the kids just to the right. It's pretty early in the morning, so there's no kids around yet, but there probably will be in an hour or two. Which gives Dave plenty of time to do this uninterrupted. He sighs, but pulls out his phone and opens Pesterchum. And of course, Rose is online. The time is different in New York - one hour ahead, to be exact - but still. It's like she's always online when Dave needs her.   -- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 6:33 -- TG: so uh TG: whats up TT: Is that really the best opening you can come up with? TG: maybe it is maybe it isnt TG: either way it started the conversation so now whos the fool rose TT: I'm going to hazard a guess at still you, Dave. TG: its always so nice talking to you TG: you really know how to boost a guys self esteem TT: Thank you. TT: It warms my blackened heart to hear that from you, Dave. TG: whoa you mean theres actually something in there TG: i thought you were just a completely empty shell of what used to be a happy little girl who got a fucking pony TT: Again with the pony? Really? TG: yes again with the fucking pony TG: your mom got you a pony TG: why the fuck are you mad at her do you know how many kids would kill for a pony TT: Dave, I find it hard it believe that you're only here to pester me about my mommy issues. So are you just bored? Would you like to fill me in on your lackluster day so far? I'll even take notes if you want. It'll help keep up the façade of me being your personal therapist and actually wanting to poke around in your nightmare of a subconscious. TG: no this isnt about your mommy issues or my crippling need for attention ill give you that TG: but while were on the topic of parents can you help me with something TT: Ah, there it is. Tell me all of your deepest issues, Dave, because I obviously have nothing better to do than sit here and give you obvious advice that you won't follow anyway. TG: how about you get off the computer leave your room drop the sass TG: like physically drop it TG: and then come back and we can talk TT: Alright, give me a minute. TG: make it two you have a lot of sass that needs to be checked TG: youd probably get stopped at an airport for carrying so much sass TG: they have a weight limit for carry on rose and that sass of yours puts you 2 tons over i mean good god no one should have that much sass TG: its sheer weight and volume would probably snap your spine TG: so just drop it and ignore it because it never existed and you are actually a perfectly pleasant person TT: Well, I tried, Dave. I tried, but it seems that I can’t drop my sass. It runs through my veins. No blood - just pure sass. TG: god dammit rose you had one job TT: I gave it my best shot. Looks like I was right to keep my day job. Which is being your personal therapist. And I don’t even get payed for my services. That’s child labor, by the way. This is an illegal and socially frowned-upon thing you’re doing. TG: you know its funny that youd bring up illegal things right now TT: What did you do? TG: wow what the fuck rose TG: i havent even finished my train of thought and youre already making assumptions TG: ill have you know that my slow but sure descent into criminal wrongdoings wont be happening until at least after my future movie career has crashed and burned TG: at least rose TT: Well, at least you have goals. Even if they're awful and should be seriously reconsidered. It's a start. TG: thank you TT: So what's this illegal thing that you definitely didn't do? TG: alright so uh TG: say that there was this older person who you had always sort of admired and looked up to as a role model TG: and say that they admire you too but for TG: different reasons TT: Clarify something for me in this hypothetical scenario of yours. How much older is this role model? TG: like twice your age TT: Uh huh. And these… “different reasons” would be…? TG: like sexual reasons TG: they want to get it on with you hella bad TG: and you think that you kind of want it too but theyre just so much older than you and youre under age and completely unsure on whether or not it would be like a serious relationship or just you guys being fuck buddies and also if you would even want a real relationship TG: because you think that you sort of kinda like them a lot but theres just so many variables and you really shouldnt because its illegal and just over all wrong TT: Dave, why are you asking me if you should have sex with your Bro? TG: thats not what im asking at all! TT: It's cute that you think you can bullshit me, even after all these years of knowing each other. TT: Here's my advice. Ready? I know you won't follow it, but I'll tell you anyway. TT: If you want to do it, then do it. TG: rose you just told me to have illegal incestuous sex with the man who is the equivalent of my father TG: i mean technically TG: hes not much of a dad but hes the closest thing to one i have TT: Hear me out, Dave. You're stubborn and so is he, so if either of you want something, there is little that will keep you from it, including laws. If you're going to fuck your brother though, a few things. TT: First, leave me out of it. I have absolutely no interest in your sex life, Dave. TT: Second, you should be certain. Mediate on it if you have to. Just be sure. Because once you say yes, I think we both know that the chances of ever going back are slim to none. TG: rose your advice is awful TT: You’re going to be seventeen in five months, Dave, which is when you will technically be of legal age based on the age of consent laws in Texas. TT: I doubt that you’re going to be more mature than you are now by the time that rolls around. And honestly, you seem perfectly capable of deciding what you do and don’t want. TT: The two of you aren't even really related. He adopted you, didn't he? Had to fill out the official paperwork after he found you on his doorstep. At least, that's how you tell it, right? TT: So my advice sums up to this: TT: Do what you want. TG: i came here for guidance and im honestly feeling so attacked right now TT: Dave, you’re not a child. You can make your own decisions, can’t you? TG: of course i can make my own decisions TG: the problem is my decisions are notoriously awful and usually end in everything getting 10x worse TT: Honestly, Dave, it’s not a hard decision make. Yes or no? TG: how the fuck should i know! TG: hes like twice my age rose and he raised me but now theres just these feelings added into the mix of what was already a complicated relationship TT: Dave, I seriously can’t help you with this. This is a delicate situation. You could always call the police and report sexual harassment and attempted incest, but something tells me that’s not an option for you. TG: yeah no shit its not TG: hes still my bro and i dont want to get him thrown in jail or anything TG: plus hes pretty much all i have TT: Then tell him no and go back to your old relationship. TG: i dont think i can TT: You’re going to have to. TT: If it helps, I promise not to mention this conversation to anyone else. TG: yeah i guess that helps TG: wouldnt want john or jade finding out about my severe daddy issues TT: I can see where that conversation would be awkward. TT: My lips are sealed, but I do have to go now. Mom is insisting on making breakfast, and I have to supervise. She’s trying to kick her drinking habit, and she’s not very… good at hand-eye coordination yet. TG: alright you go make sure your mom doesnt burn the house down trying to make cereal and ill keep my pants on TG: setting goals rose TG: its the first and most important step of getting shit done TT: Have fun being productive, Dave. And good luck. TG: thanks TG: i think im gonna need it -- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 6:54 --   Dave doesn't feel any better about the whole thing when he closes Pesterchum and leans back against the park bench. If anything, he feels worse. That was all Rose has to offer? “Do what you want”? Really? He sighs, running a hand through his hair and tucking his phone back into his pocket. Fine, then. He can definitely say no to Bro. Doing so will deny both of them, but if he can’t make a choice, then society can make one for him. This is the smart path. The one he usually avoids, but it will have the best outcome for both of them in the long run. There’s still no children in the park when he leaves. Just a couple out jogging. When he gets home, Bro is - predictably - waiting for him. That’s new. Usually, Bro isn’t predictable. He's sitting on the futon, though the TV is off and his normally relaxed position is tense. Dave realizes how bad this must have looked to Bro. He could have easily gone to report him to the police, but Dave hadn't. And Bro could have gone down to the park if he wanted to check out the legitimacy of Dave’s story, but he hadn't. They’re walking a thin line between each other, but at least they still have mutual trust. Bro doesn't say anything. He never was one for smalltalk, and that probably isn't going to be changing anytime soon. Regardless, Dave can feel Bro's eyes on him as he moves into the kitchen to get something to drink. The last time he tried this around Bro, he ended up with a boner, but this time it goes much smoother. Dave still doesn't risk bending over. Instead, he just pours himself a glass of milk, pretending not to be staring at Bro as he does. They're both waiting for the other to make a move. To say something before the tension in the air becomes unbearable. Finally, Dave sighs, setting the untouched glass down on the counter. He doesn't know why he bothered with it. He isn't even thirsty. “Bro. We should… talk.” Dave begins nervously, not risking so much as a glance in Bro's direction. “This… thing going on between us - whatever it is - it needs to stop. Before it gets out of hand or someone finds out and you end up in jail.” The words feel good to get off of his chest, but all it does is make Dave more aware of what he's still holding back. “I know.” Bro's voice, low and unusually quiet, comes as a surprise to Dave. “We should stop, shouldn't we? But before we do, lemme ask you something.” Dave knew that letting his guard down was a mistake. Bro is upon him in no time at all, his hands gripping the counter on either side of Dave as they lock eyes. Oh, sure, he tries to look away, but then Bro grasps his jaw loosely with one leather-clad hand and Dave knows that he's royally fucked. This close, Dave can see the outline of Bro's eyes through his shades. He can't remember when he last saw Bro's amber orbs head on, but he can remember how they look in great detail. They're nothing but a faded memory, but still special. Still beautiful. “Do you want this?” Bro asks under his breath, so quiet that Dave isn't sure at first if his brother even spoke at all. “Wha-?” “Do you want this?” He repeats, a hardened edge to his voice as his hold on Dave's jaw tightens. “And I don't want to hear some bullshit excuse about how wrong it is. I don't want you to tell me the consequences or everything immoral about it. I'm already going to Hell, Dave. So tell me straight up. Do. You. Want. This?” He punctuates each word carefully, and he's so close by now that Dave can feel their breath mingling and it sends shivers down his spine. Dave can’t answer immediately. He’s searching Bro’s shades, looking for - something. He’s not sure what. He wants to know what Bro wants. Does he want a quick fuck or does he want a regular thing? Like a relationship. But then again, Bro wouldn’t be asking if all he wanted was to fuck. He would just do it if that was the case. And besides. He had asked about what Davewants. Consequences be damned. He closes his eyes, and the word comes out as no more than a breath. “Yes.” ***** Day 25 ***** Chapter Notes To be honest, I wasn't planning on updating this fic, but? My friend kind of had a mental breakdown when I mentioned that this chapter was done so now I'm updating it because I worry that he might actually travel a state over to beat my door down if I don't. So enjoy this! See the end of the chapter for more notes Bro gets the feeling that Dave is mad at him. Not that he blames the kid. After that "talk" when Dave returned home from the park, Bro had kind of just left. He didn't know what Dave was expecting to happen next, but it was likely something that lead to the bedroom. Or just bent over the counter. Bro is flexible. But instead of taking his brother right then and there as they had both wanted, Bro used every bit of his self-control to pull himself away and go to his room. Because, in all honesty, he didn't trust Dave's answer. Even assuming that Dave had been 100% honest back there, though, Bro still would have left. He doesn't want to rush into anything. Dave isn't some one- night stand or a toy to enjoy until it breaks. He wants this whole thing to really meansomething, as cheesy as it sounds. So, yeah, he left. He's saving it all for another day. And fuck it all to Hell and back if that isn't hard. The inner conflict is the worst part, Bro thinks. His urges - the ones he's been suppressing all his life in order to remain stoic and indifferent - have been given freedom, and they want nothing more than to pin Dave to the futon and fuck him until he's crying and begging for Bro to stop because he's cum so many times that it hurts. And that's a really nice sounding idea in it's own right, but Bro won't let himself do it. Logic keeps hitting him upside the head. Going too rough too soon will scare him off,it says, and Bro agrees. You don't know what he likes. What if he hates you after you rush into something blind, logic points out again, taunting him now, and Bro begrudgingly agrees. What if when he said "yes" he was just doing it because that's the answer you wanted,logic is a smug little fuck as it says this, but againBro has to agree. They're all valid points, and worth far more than his stupid urges. Those can wait a week or two for him to figure this out. Dave helps by keeping out of sight, though. Bro hasn't seen him at all in the past five days. He can sense the atmosphere, though. The heavy air around Dave's door. The waves of frustration that keep him from initiating any interactions at all. He can appreciate that Dave is upset, but for what reasons, Bro isn't sure. He could always ask, but he's never been very talkative. Words don't convoy thoughts as well as actions do. Bro does his best to keep away, too. Not that it's hard. Summer is beginning to wind down, with August and slightly colder weather just around the corner. As such, there's a lot more party goers out for some last minute thrills. It's been almost an explosion of activity, and it's both exhausting and rewarding for Bro. He usually gets more calls than ever this time of year, and this time is no exception. He heads out around five after ordering some takeout for Dave to eat while he's gone, and doesn't get back in until three. It's hard to keep his smuppet site updated with work hours like that, but he figures that he's making enough money working himself to the bone to deny his "fans" for a while. The plan was working great. He was making money and keeping himself so busy that he only thought about Dave when he wasn't on the move. Bro should really stop thinking about him completely, though. For the moment however, he'll take his victories where he can get them. Yes, everything was going nicely. He had a routine going and was making connections. But Bro probably should have taken into consideration how stubborn and impatient Dave is. He gets home later than usual - close to four in the morning - and is greeted by the lights still on and Dave planted securely on the couch. The TV is off, but Bro could probably walk over and touch the screen and find it still warm from use if he really wanted to. "What're you still doing up?" He asks in an almost disinterested tone, his voice raspy and gruff thanks to a dry throat. Dave doesn't seem to notice, and upon prompting, sits up straight in his seat to watch Bro move to the kitchen. "Waiting for you." He replies, clearly unhappy. "What took you so long?" Bro shrugs, grabbing a glass and filling it up with water from the sink. He is, admittedly, enjoying the ting of jealousy in Dave's voice. He probably thought that his big bro is sleeping around, but Bro doesn't think he could do that if he tried. He only seems to want sex anymore when Dave is involved. "Doesn't matter." Bro says dismissively, downing about half the glass before speaking again. "I could have been passed out in an alley. You should be asleep either way." Dave is almost done growing from the looks of things, but that doesn't mean that these last few years of growth are suddenly unimportant. "Thought I set a bedtime for this exact reason." Scowling, Dave shoots a glare in his direction. "Don't be an ass about it, Bro. You don't care how long I stay up as long as I end up sleeping. Besides." There's a pause. "I think we both know why I'm up." The glass isn't empty yet, but Bro sets it down in the sink anyway. "Just say what you want to say and don't dance around the subject, Dave." He sighs, his back to his brother as he talks. Another pause. Dave is really good at those. "Is it something I did?" He asks softly, barely-restrained insecurity in his voice. "That makes you avoid me." Bro doesn't reply immediately. That was probably the most Dave has ever opened up to him in the last three years. It's… a little overwhelming. He sounded so hurt when he said it, too. As if Bro's supposed rejection stung more than any swipe from a sword. "Dave- Dave, no." Bro sighs, turning around to face his brother with a frown on his face. "I'm not avoiding you because of anything you did, alright? I'm avoiding you because I don't trust myself around you." He explains, making his way over to the couch slowly. This earns him a curious look. "Don't trust yourself? With what?" Dave asks, and Bro can appreciate what he means. Usually, the only thing Bro can trust is himself. This is… really odd for him. The only thing separating him and Dave now is the back of the couch, but it's still the closest Bro has been to him in days. Dave smells like his girly apple-cinnamon shampoo and faintly of Bro's rarely-used cologne, like he's trying to impress someone. He can't be mad at the kid. Not when it's so clearly working. "Are you sure you want that answer, Dave?" Bro asks quietly, brushing his fingertips along his little brother's jawline. He used to do that when Dave was sleeping but, surprisingly, Bro hasn't watched Dave sleep since this whole thing began. Trust is a fragile thing, and Bro doesn't have the luxury to give himself the benefit of the doubt. "It's not an easy thing to accept. It's taken me years." He watches the gears in Dave's head turn, until finally - slowly - he nods. "Yeah. I'm sure." And there's a good chance he already knows. But knowing isn't really the same as hearing Bro say it. There's a moment's pause between them. Dave, waiting for the answer to the question he had solved a while ago, and Bro unsure how to reply. Words aren't his thing. But for Dave, he can try. What does he have to lose by this point, after all? His hand slowly traces up Dave's jaw, caressing the skin silently as he works higher and higher until he reaches the earpiece of Dave's shades. He lifts them off without resistance, setting them carefully on the side table next to the futon. Bro removes his own shades next, blinking to adjust to the light before he refocuses on Dave. "God damn, did I miss those eyes…" He breathes without really realizing it, tilting Dave's chin up to get a better look. Maybe Bro should ban shades in the house. It's been years since he's seen Dave's ruby reds without his own pointed shades blocking the view, and they're far more stunning that he remembers. Bro doesn't like to toss compliments around, but words like "beautiful" seem to undermine how truly spectacular Dave's eyes are. There's a word for them somewhere. Maybe Bro will figure it out one day. Dave is clearly uncomfortable with being so open, but he doesn't try to reach for his shades or complain about the brightness of the room. Probably because Bro isn't wearing shades either, and fair is fair. "It's clear to me," Bro begins carefully, clearing his throat and earning himself Dave's full attention, "that you have no idea how much I want you." He frowns a little in confusion, staring up at Bro. "I-" Dave cuts himself off and tries again. "What?" But Bro isn't really paying attention to Dave anymore. He's started talking, and he's going to change his mind about it if he doesn't keep going. "Actually, forget what I just said. It's gone beyond want. Dave, I need you." He sounds so vulnerable when he says it that way that Bro visibly cringes, but he pushes on anyway. "Is that what you wanted to hear, Dave? Because here's the truth: I need you. Right now. We could cuddle or some stupid shit like that, or you could bend over the counter and let me show you something you've never experienced before. There are so many things I could do to you. With you. And it's going to be hard in more ways than one. If you let me, we couldn't go back. A brotherly relationship would pretty much be out the window. I'd get put in jail if the wrong people found out, and you'd be put in foster care, but I'm done caring." Bro pulls back suddenly, his jaw tight and expression flat. He shouldn't have said all that. Dave is quiet, just staring up at him with a look akin to shock. Fuck. He messed up big time, didn't he? He came on too strong, and now Dave is going to be overwhelmed and probably say no. Fantastic. "Uh, Dave, listen. I-" He starts to explain himself, maybe backtrack a little and pretend that Dave isn'tthe center of his world and thus regain some of his dignity, but he's cut off before he can. Dave is a surprisingly good kisser. Now that he is actually kissing back, of course. Closing his eyes, Bro wraps his arms around Dave's small waist, pulling him up the rest of the way until he's perched on the back of the futon. He's willing to do nothing except kiss Dave for hours. His lips feel perfect against Bro's, soft and a little thin and dry, but he doesn't care. Dave's arms are around his neck, his slender fingers fiddling with the bit of blonde hair sticking out from under Bro's cap. Pianist fingers, his little brother has. They would be perfect fiddling with something else- The couch is in the way, Bro decides. So he pulls Dave off of it entirely, the kid's legs going around his waist as he clings on for dear life. As if Bro is going to just drop him now. Kissing Dave is weird and a little awkward. Neither of them is entirely sure what they're doing, or if the kiss should be hard or sweet. Bro cups the back of Dave's head, leaning forward just a little to press him against the futon and the kiss settles in between the two extremes, deep but not desperate. It's satisfying in ways Bro had never pictured, while also somehow managing to not be nearly enough. His grip on Dave's hips tightens, causing his brother to let out this little noisethat he wants to hear more of. It's absolutely beautiful. "Bro, we really shouldn't." Dave mutters as he pulls out of the kiss, biting his lip nervously. "It's getting late, and…" He trails off, unable to continue once he realizes that there's no good reason for them to stop. In reply, Bro raises an eyebrow. Dave has stopped messing with his hair, instead dipping his finger tips down the back of Bro's shirt to trace the top of his spine. "I think we both know that the last thing we should do is stop." He responds, his voice taking on a ragged tone. Dave knits his brows together in confusion, opening his mouth to say something, but Bro cuts him off before he can. The second kiss is much more frantic than the last. Their hips press flush together, both of them scrambling to be closer, and- Bro lets out an embarrassingly needy moan, his eyes widening in surprise. Fuck. He hadn't noticed that Dave wasn't wearing any pants. It got worse though, his boxers replaced with tight shorts that he couldn't remember ever seeing the kid wear. If he had, then he would have initiated something far sooner. It doesn't help that Dave looks just as surprised as Bro - like he hadn't been expecting a reaction like that from some shorts. His eyes spark with confidence, and this time, Bro is the one who gets cut off as Dave resumes the kiss. He grips his guardian's face firmly in his hands, parting his mouth, and it takes Bro just a moment to realize what Dave is going for here. He still thinks that the couch is a piece of shit and they should burn it, but it serves a nice purpose when Bro decides that standing while doing this just doesn't work for him. Bro moves his hands from the small of Dave's back to grip his ass, drawing this needy little whimper from him that only reaffirms the need to press Dave against something. The futon works just fine for this function, even if Bro has to waste precious time by walking around it. Dave grunts softly when he's dropped onto the plush setting, but he doesn't get so much as the time to thinkabout complaining before Bro is hovering above him. He likes the way Dave's pupils dilate at the change of position, lust and the darkened apartment making them almost completely block out the red of his irises. "Bro…" He murmurs, licking his lips either subconsciously or on purpose. Either way, it makes it just a little harder to be patient as heat pulses though Bro's body. "Are we going to…" He trails off, wrapping his hands around his brother's neck. Dave didn't finish his trail of thought, but Bro doesn't need him to. "No." He says, shaking his head despite the way every inch of him wants to say yes and take his little brother here and now. "I…" Bro swallows thickly, brushing Dave's bangs out of his eyes. He makes a mental note to give his brother a haircut sometime soon. "I want to do it when the moment is right." The words come out more sure than Bro actually feels. "And that is not on the couch at four in the morning after I've been out all night." He says, and it's much easier this time. There's a beat, and for a moment, Bro worries that Dave is going to be upset. He shifts a little, looking confused but… hopeful. "So, this is, like…" He pauses, searching for the right words, "a… real relationship you're after?" Now it's Bro's turn to be confused. "Wha-? Of course it is, Dave. If all I wanted was sex, don't you think there would be easier ways to get it?" Was thatwhat had been bothering Dave this whole time? Bro wasn't sure whether or not he should be insulted and take it personally. Maybe it was partly his fault. Certainly, he could be more open and affectionate. It had always just been… easier to retreat behind the safety of his walls, though. For a long minute, there's silence. Dave stares, seeming unable to process that his older brother might actually have feelings. "I… would like that." He breathed. "A relationship would be… great." He let out a short laugh, cutting through the tension as he pulled Bro back down on top of him. The third kiss was soft and light, both of them trying to pour years and years worth of affection into a single gesture. It wasn't going to work, but that didn't keep them from trying. The words "I love you"would suit the moment greatly, but Bro didn't say it. There was a better moment. Right now, he traced his fingertips down Dave's thighs, the boy shivering beneath him as he stopped at Dave's knee, rubbing little circles in his skin. This was long overdue. He just needed to kiss Dave, needed to feel his warmth and just make him feel loved. That was part of his job as a parent, wasn't it? And he had been seriously slacking in that department. Slowly, the lust dripped from the moment, and they both forgot their libido in favor of much more tender feelings. It was… quite the pleasant change. Bro decided that he liked it. He wanted to do this for hours. A yawn broke the kiss though, Dave tilting his head to the side to try and pretend that he wasn't tired. "Sorry." He murmurs, and tries to lean back up and continue. Bro stops him though, pushing himself up and putting a solid hand on Dave's chest to keep him down. "No dice, kid." Bro shakes his head. "It's-" he glances at the clock, "shit, five in the fucking morning? Never spent that much time just kissin'. Regardless-" He climbs off of Dave, standing up and stretching until his back pops almost painfully and he winces. "It's bed time. It was a while ago, so c'mon. Bed. You're tired." Dave looks like he wanted to argue for a moment, then he pauses and considers something. "Will you stay with me?" He asks, so quiet that Bro isn't sure for a moment if he actually spoke. Another pause. Why did they have to be so awkward when it came to the topic of affection? "Well, I mean, sure. If you want." Bro says honestly. "You've… never asked before." This causes Dave to turn a faint shade of red, and he shrugs a little. "You've never seemed open to the idea before." He hesitates. "I… guess we're changing things, huh?" He has an odd look on his face - like he can't believe that this isn't all some huge joke. Bro can't help but smile. "Yeah. I guess we are." Chapter End Notes Technically, I could end here but that same friend I mentioned from before wants a sex scene so guess who's going to keep this story going? Haha, fuck me this is so bad- End Notes Music Inspiration: "You Look Better When I'm Drunk" by The White Tie Affair. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!