Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/13431090. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Major_Character_Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage Category: M/M Fandom: 僕のヒーローアカデミア_|_Boku_no_Hero_Academia_|_My_Hero_Academia Relationship: Bakugou_Katsuki/Midoriya_Izuku Character: Midoriya_Izuku, Bakugou_Katsuki, Yagi_Toshinori_|_All_Might, Shigaraki Tomura_|_Shimura_Tenko, Todoroki_Shouto, Yaoyorozu_Momo Additional Tags: prototype_katsuki, Midoriya_Izuku_Does_Not_Go_to_U.A._High_School, because_he_looses_his_memories, erm, white_room_torture_kinda_setting, katsuki_is_gentle_with_izuku, but_he_usually_hurts_him, freestyle_i guess, my_poor_pudding_is_suffering, izuku_is_a_genius, thats_why_he_ends up_kidnapped, Maybe_-_Freeform, idk_-_Freeform, he_cool_af, with_a sherlocky_attitude_later_on_but_no_feels, izuku_has_an_iq_of_200+, Izuku gets_a_quirk, but_he_doesnt_know_about_it, endeavor_is_actually_nice_deep down_inside, Omega_Midoriya_Izuku, Omegaverse, Alpha_Bakugou_Katsuki Stats: Published: 2018-01-28 Updated: 2018-02-27 Chapters: 6/? Words: 3198 ****** Let's go back ****** by Kimura Summary Remastered version of Let's go back, that was an absolute trainwreck. "Help me" That's what his eyes tell me. I know who he is. He is Midoriya Izuku. He fights like an A-rank hero. He kills with no hesitation. But behind that mask, I know he's crying. I know he fell into an abyss. I know he isn't the same as before. I know that he changed. But I also know that somewhere, the Deku I knew is holding on. Waiting for me.   Notes Pheeew So I guess I'm going into the multiple fanfic mode. I'll start with this for now, and I hope I did better. I'm kinda sorry for making All Might an asshole. ***** He's my number one. (Prologue) ***** He watched his house burn down. He held on to his stomach. If moments ago he felt like he was going to puke, now he felt like he wanted to die. Not his mother, please.  Someone. Anyone. ... The first time Katsuki saw Izuku, he felt he was looking at an angel. His unruffled green hair reminded him of the soft grass he loved so much. His eyes were soft, filled with an innocence that made him feel a sense of delight when they lighted up around him. They were three, and their heads were full of dreams. "Someday, let's be heroes together!", Izuku chanted merrily. "Ha, no way! Your quirk won't be as good as mine!", he cheekily answered. "Huh...", Izuku sighed. Katsuki mentally slapped himself. He said it again, even if he didn't mean it. -"It's fine." -"Eh?" -"Kacchan is my number one, after all!" Katsuki blushed as he pouted. His pout formed into a smile as he hugged his friend. It wasn't love yet, but a bud had softly peeked out of the soil. It was flowering. ... It was a sunny day when an explosion announced the awakening of Katsuki's quirk. "AMAZING, KACCHAN!", Izuku shouted, as the caretaker ran to the commotion. "I can't wait for my quirk!", Izuku told him. Katsuki smiled at him. "Alright kids, let's get back", the caretaker said, cupping her hands as he raised his voice. He grabbed the hose, putting out the small fire that had been spreading through the weeds. He sighed. An explosive quirk, huh. It'd be a pain to contain it. "I'll be number one!", Katsuki chanted. He had gained a small pack of followers. But he had eyes for Izuku only.  No one else mattered. ***** Breaking down ***** Chapter Summary It's a Mido POV (?) So I just want to keep it clear, Mido has basically lost every aspect of "him". The villains stuffed him with plenty of quirks (cyborg style), and left him in a weak state, making him believe he's not important. He fights, despite the pain, since he knows that of he doesn't, it will be worse. And he gets renamed Nakushi, the meaning is explained in the chapter notes. Chapter Notes WARNING, RAPE!!!! SKIP CHAPTER RIGHT AFTER THE CURSIVE IF YOU DONT WANT SEE EVERYONES BUNBUN SUFFER! See the end of the chapter for more notes I'm Nakushi. I'm unwanted. I'm lost. I'm meaningless. I don't have feelings, or rather, feelings are something I shouldn't have, or Master will be mad. He'll thrash me, he'll kick me, he'll make me cry. And if tears roll over my cheeks, he laughs in satisfaction. And then he starts again. I shouldn't cry, or he'll hurt me more. I should not speak. I'm not a human. I was created by them. And that means, I should be loyal. His words are law, and his actions are monuments. I can't feel pain. That's what master says. A mere puppet shouldn't feel anything. But I feel a sting. My whole body stings. Master can't know. He'll get rid of me. I'll be useless.  But even if Master says so, there's a weird sensation I can't brush off. It's yellow, I believe. Something...no, someone important to me.  Who...? "Nakushi!", Master calls me. I run to him, bowing profusely. "Yes, Master?", I ask.  He looks at me with a face of anger. "Strip.", he says, pulling his zipper down. I take out my clothes slowly, trying to hide my trembling. "FASTER!", he shouts. I take off my last garment. "Now, you know you're good at spreading legs, so show me your ass", Master commands. I put my hands over a table, raising my hips. He thrusts. I whimper. I cover my mouth, trying not to cry. I shouldn't say anything. I had gotten used to that odd stingy feeling, but there's another one. I feel like puking. I have no idea what it is. He gains speed, each thrust becoming more aggressive. Master moans in pleasure. He strokes my penis vigorously, using a lot of strength. He had a bad a day. I feel something warm fill me up. He pulls out, and the white liquid oozes from my anus. He walks away, throwing a cloth over me. "Clean it up." "Yes, Master..." The door closes, and I'm left in darkness again.  Chapter End Notes Nakushi 失くし, lost, abolished. नकुशि, unwanted. I just kinda like name puns, and I hate the fact that Nakushi is an actual name in Marathi. I thought it would be fitting, since Mido has lost himself and is currently unwanted. ***** Chapter 3 ***** He slept on the floor again. His body ached. His stomach felt awful, and he clutched it tightly. He held on. Thinking of that yellow stain in his mind calmed him down. His tears stopped. He sighed and fell asleep, yearning for something softer. “Hero analysis for the future”, was what the worn out cover read in hiragana. He ruffled his blond hair, scratched his neck and held it closer. It was something like his Bible. Despite being written by a child of six, it was rather impressive, holding detailed information.  Bakugo Katsuki couldn’t care less for what was written, but rather who wrote it. His dear Deku. Out of the possessions rescued from the house that darned day, he pulled out hurriedly anything that belonged to him. And out came the bundle of pages, held by thread. He bit his lip. According to the police Midoriya Izuku was no more at 13. But Katsuki was more than just sure that he was breathing. His heart was beating. But he wasn’t probably in his right mind. After all, the Deku he knew wouldn’t kill. Even as child, he sought to forgive. Even a villain. “They are just lost”, he used to say. That Deku was now a killer. Probably. “Who’s lost now, dumbass”, Katsuki mumbled to himself. He wanted to see him. Hold him. Love him. After so many years, he had finally recognized his feelings. What that enticing scent meant. Midoriya Izuku is his soulmate. He gritted his teeth, hating the fact that he was able to avoid what happened. If he had been with Izuku that day, nothing would have happened. “Wait for me”, he said, kissing the notebook. He looked at the sky. It looked full of promises. ... “Nakushi”, Tomura called. In time shorter than a whisper, the youth presented himself before his master. He still felt rather nauseated from yesterday, but he had mastered the ability to hide it in less than a year. Before that is, well, pitch black. Nakushi ignored why, believed what his master always said. That he was created by him, that he isn’t human. “You’re one second later than usual”, he said gritting his teeth. “My apologies, Master”, Nakushi mumbled. It was nighttime , the moon shining in its full splendor. “Bludgeoner needs some help. Apparently some heroes busted him. Go!” Nakushi nodded. He didn’t have a bite to eat since yesterday. He ran, despite being obviously tired. ... “Surrender!”, a hero shouted, cornering the Bludgeoner. He snickered. Before the nameless hero could retaliate, he felt a sharp pain on his neck. Blood. It poured out like a fountain. He clutched it, but alas, he had no hope. He fell with a loud clatter of whatever he hid in his costume. “Surgeon-chan”, the Bludgeoner greeted, reciprocated with a nod. The Surgeon. An A-rank villain. A high threat to heroes and civilians alike. Mindless. A killing machine. Heartless. A torturer. Well known for dragging information out of even strong people. A scared child, not knowing who he is. Not knowing what he once was. Nakushi picked up the bloodied scalpel, shaking the blood off. “We gotta get out of here, kiddo”, the Bludgeoner said, “more of them fuckers are on their way”, he mentioned as he ran off. “Hmmn.”, he said. But the now gone villain had ran off. He had killed again. He felt his stomach churn and his heart stop. That feeling he couldn’t shake off haunted him every time. He brushed it off trying to breathe. “HALT!”, a voice shouted. He didn’t. He ran faster than wind. He was gone. “Wasn’t that the Surgeon...?”, another asked. A-rank threat. That meant they had to address every single available hero. And that meant All Might would appear. Nakushi‘ Swift’s fear was All Might. Every time he saw his face, he felt fear. He felt that sting. He ran, not stopping. Avoid that man at all costs was something the master would tell him every time he ventured out on a mission. If all went well, he’d get a pat on his head from the master. ***** That darned day, zenpen. ***** Chapter Summary What happened the day he went missing. Chapter Notes See the end of the chapter for notes The roaring flames. The screams. And all I did was to look for you. ... "I'm back, master." Nakushi panted for a while, reminding himself not to be loud. He held his breath as he crossed paths with Tomura. He was laying down in the sofa, dozing off. "Hm", he groaned, not saying much. That single noise made Nakushi realize that he didn't do so well. He was late. He exited the room, reaching for his prison. He sat down with a blank mind. ... "Where are you off to everyday, Deku?", Bakugou asked, slinging his bag over his shoulder. "It's a secret!", Midoriya laughed. He wouldn't tell his friend that the hero number one was training him. That he could become a hero. That he could fight alongside him. How would he react? Would he be surprised? Mad? Happy? He ignored this, because he knew that either way, sooner or later, Bakugou would accept it. Because he always did.  "Man, you literally disappear everyday!", he groaned. "You'll know someday, I guess...", Izuku said, his voice trailing off.  "Right...", Katsuki mumbled, wondering what to say next. "Yeah! Deku, whad'ya think you'll get for the test? I'm definitely an alpha, though!", he laughed. Izuku was fine being a beta. He really didn't care much about the sex test, since he was almost sure that he'd get the same result 80% of the population usually got. A beta. A common person. "Probably a beta, I guess", he said. He had a soft hunch that he'd not be one, but he shook it off. No way. The results would come after a week, since tests got rerun many times. It was a difficult procedure, and mistakes were made many times, resulting in havoc. For that, DNA would be rechecked many times. It was protocol.  "Ah, it's time", Izuku thought, staring at his watch. "Sorry Kacchan! I'll catch up later!", he said loudly. "Oh, no, no, no, you're sticking with me!", he said snickering. "Kacchan, not today!", Izuku said, shaking him off. He couldn't miss that day. It was the day he'd finally get his quirk. He'd been preparing so long for this. "Today's a special day, dummy!", Katsuki said, holding him back. "Don't you have something to tell me?", he asked, obviously worried. "What?", was all he got. He had forgotten.  "We can do it next time, Kacchan!", he said. "I have something important today, so please don't bother me!" "What can be more important than my birthday...?" Midoriya froze. April 20th. His birthday. He forgot.  Katsuki didn't say a word. He just stood there. "You have been ditching me for months, Izuku." He used his name. He was mad. Rather than mad, he was more sad. "I HATE YOU!", he shouted, running away. "Kacchan..." He couldn't chase after him. He stood there for several minutes. After a while, he ran off to meet with All Might, hoping he'd just cool down after a while. Chapter End Notes So yeah, All Might's personality is kinda different. ***** That darned day, Choukan ***** Chapter Summary RAPE ALERT!!! DEATH ALERT!!! Also, I changed the fact that All Might was the one who raped Mido. But Izuku believes that it was All Might. It was dark, what do you expect? And he also blames All Might for what happens later, so yeah. Such angst. Much sad. Very cry. Chapter Notes Btw, if you don't want to read the rape scene, skip the italic. See the end of the chapter for more notes "What took you so long?", Toshinori asked. "U-uhm, something came up, and I-" "It's fine, my boy", All Might laughed. "Today's the day! How do you feel?" -"Terrified." -"Really? Not an ounce of excitement?" -"Maybe...?" -"Well then...EAT THIS." The blond lock of hair shone in the last rays of light. Izuku swallowed it, gagging. Hair is kinda hard to swallow after all. He didn't feel much different, so he shrugged his shoulders. "So...?" "Nothing", he said. All Might nodded, explaining that that was exactly what he felt. Nothing. -"All Might...?", Izuku nudged. "Yeah?" -"You're an alpha, right?" -"Yes." -"I'd be glad if I'm one too, you know? I usually make myself believe that I don't care, but I think I do. The test results will come up next week, and I feel scared." "It's a part of you, my boy. Reaching your highest limit will be when you love who you are. When you accept you flaws and mistakes. When you- All Might's dialogue was cut short by an odd scent. Enticing, making his head fuzzy. He's an omega. He had to get out of there. Those pheromones were the strongest he had ever smelled, making his body shiver. Without realizing it, he pounced onto his disciple.  "Toshinori-san?!", Izuku shouted. The scent was too strong. Maybe because of that, he came back to his senses. Without a word, he dashed away. It was dark. Midoriya didn't see a thing. He didn't hear anything. He believed All Might to be still standing there. And then he felt it. Someone gagging him. The grip was strong. He couldn't call out for help.  "Be careful, he told us to bring him up unscathed", a voice said. "Wait a minute! This kid's on his heat!", another one called out. "Really?! Lemme see?" "He-heat...?", Izuku thought, confused. He was an omega...? He was still scared, no doubt, but this new announcement overlapped his own safety. He wanted to use his quirk, but nothing came out.  "I guess the boss will be fine if we play around with him for a bit, eh?" Laughter ensued. And their eyes set on the boy with green hair.  "Let's have a fine time, boy." The man took off his hand. Clad in darkness, with people he didn't know and the person he admired, Izuku wanted to scream. Which he tried to do, but he couldn't.  "Ah, you can't speak because I put my quirk on you, kiddo. All you can do is moan, you know?" "It's okay, it's okay. You'll feel comfortable soon enough", he said.  He caressed Izuku's face. He felt repulsed. He wanted to puke. It was so confusing. It was so scary. It was dark, but before he could distinguish silhouettes, but now it was pitch black. He bit his lip. He could tell someone had switched some sort of light on, but there was no way to tell. He felt someone lift his t-shirt. Another voice excitedly said: "He has cute nipples!". Midoriya oddly knew what was next, shivering. He felt the man's tongue lick his teat vigorously, making him giddy with excitement. He sucked one while playing with the other one. Another pair of hands reached for his pants, unzipping them. "Just sucking on his nipples gets him so hard! He has the talent of an onahole!", said the unzipping man. Midoriya's penis sprang free. Even if he was feeling it, he didn't want it. He thought of Katsuki. Was he having a swell time? He cursed mentally. He should have postponed the meeting with All Might. His mind was so clouded, wanting to get a stupid quirk, when he left behind things that were more important. Katsuki was more important that anyone else. "Look at his hole! It's so tiny!", "It's dripping with juices, man!", "He's begging to be fucked!" Izuku struggled. No way. They were going to go that far...? He felt a pair of hands spread his anus wide. Something fell on his butt. Something warm. "Ugh, you didn't have to put your spit on it!". It's his spit. He waved his feet a bit, still struggling. He felt his butt damp and hot. He couldn't breathe. "It's pointless to fight, kiddo".  Where was All Might at?, was all Izuku could think about. He hadn't heard his voice anywhere. He was probably near by. Or maybe he decided not to speak. "Mr. Superhero, you're up after me!", he heard then. He was there, after all. His eyes teared up. "I trusted you. I trusted you. I trusted you..." Without any warning, he felt something big inside of him. "Fuck, he's tight!", the man swore, thrusting hard. Izuku began tearing up. The pain was worse than what he'd expect.  I don't want this. "Man, his moans ARE something!" "Shut him up, Yamamoto." "Don't say my name, fucking Miyauchi!" "You just said mine, fucker." "Whatever..." He felt his lips against his. His first kiss, shared with a stranger. Shared with a rapist. His hand pressed upon his jaw, making him open his mouth. His tongue wiggled inside of him. Like a disgusting worm. He tasted of smoke. The thrusts got harder, and before he knew it, he heard the man moan. He came. Inside. His stomach felt so disgustingly warm. Another one went in. This time, it was slippery and went in with no problem. That was worse.  He just wanted it to stop. Mr. Superhero? That man was no better than a villain. Why? "What did I do wrong...?", was all he could think. Think of something. Kacchan. The yellowness calmed him down. He stopped struggling.  "Ah, he finally stopped!"  "He accepted he's a fucking slut!" No matter what the pain was, he'd get through it. He could feel more than one penis. He could feel each time more hands. But it didn't matter. Kacchan. That's all what matters. Every thrust felt like a stab, and every second felt like it was happening faster.  Soon, it was over. "We gotta get him to the boss." "Are you a fucking idiot?" "What?" "He'll go to his home when he wakes up, right?" "Yeah, obviously." "Well, yeah" "Hmm, hmm." "Let's make sure he doesn't have a home to go back to, so he doesn't escape boss." "You're a fucking genius!" ... He felt a nudge. Who...? Fear seeped in again. He screamed like hell broke loose. He cried. Toshinori never thought he's see him in that state. He'd realized so late that it wasn't safe to leave him behind when it was too late. Even when he brought the suppressant.  "GET OUT! GET OUT! LEAVE ME ALONE!" He had no choice. He left his jacket on the floor. His clothes were torn up and sticky. Once alone, he broke into tears and wailed like a child.   Chapter End Notes Man, I went for a totally different approach. I tried imagining a scene, and I'm kinda surprised. ***** That darned day, Kouhen ***** Chapter Summary The third part of the damned day. Chapter Notes See the end of the chapter for notes He limped his way through the empty streets. He was sure a stranger or two peeked at him, but he honestly didn't care. He needed someone. April 21st already. It was maybe too late to wish him a happy birthday. He reached his best friend's house. He took the key hidden under the flowerpot. He carefully opened the door, still weakened. "Kacchan...", he mumbled. Izuku was sure his heat stopped. Because all he felt was a drilling pain in his butt. His legs felt weak. He heard a door creak.  "DEKU?!" He was grabbed in the nick of time. "Kacchan...", Izuku mumbled once more, and started wailing. "W-what happened? You- Katsuki couldn't finish his sentence. There was an odd scent filling the room. It was alluring. He could tell Deku was raped. He could smell it. But the fragrance emitted from his body. "De-deku..." "Kacchan...?"  What he saw was a face had never seen before. It was a face of need. Katsuki pushed him down to the floor, unable to control himself.    Katsuki pushed him down to the floor, unable to contain himself. “De-Deku…what is this…?” His face was flushed. Midoriya didn’t really mind it much, but then he saw those eyes. Those eyes full of need. The panting of his best friend as his hand slid through his T- shirt brought him back to the painful hours that he experienced. That time that felt like an eternity. He’d rather walk through fire than go through it again. “DON’T TOUCH ME!” He slapped him. “A-aah…Kacchan…” Not knowing what to do or what to say, he dashed away to the only person he could trust. His mother.   Chapter End Notes Alright, I don't know Japanese. I can speak a bit, but it's self taught, so I guess the zenpen and kouhen and the choukan aren't really the appropriate terms. So I apologize beforehand if they seemed a bit offensive due to language misuse. Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!